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silverisbestboy · 4 years

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Hedgies x Child!Reader

Requested by anonymous: I really liked your Shadow x child reader. Can I please have some more headcanons about the main three Hedgehogs with a human child? Thank you in advance!

Sonic:

When Amy asked him to get some flour for a recipe she was trying to make, Sonic zipped over to the nearest supermarket

What he was not expecting to find however, was a little human child sobbing in the middle of the toy aisle

"Hey, what's the matter lil guy?"

With wide, teary eyes, you explained to the blue hedgehog that you lost your mommy when you stopped to look at a toy and now you couldn't find her (bruh, that ever happen to y'all? It happened to me so often that I came up with a plan on how I was gonna survive in the grocery store)

"Well don't worry little fella, we're gonna find her, promise."

Next thing you know, you're in the mobians arms and zooming around the market in search of your mother

With the help of Sonic's speed, you end up finding her in no time, talking to a police officer near the front entrance about her missing child

"This your kid ma'am?"

Your mother is obviously very greatful to the young hedgehog and even offers to pay him for helping reunite the two of you

Of course, he declines though

He meets you again when taking a walk through a park

"Hey kid, how ya holding up?"

"Mister! I'm sorry, I never got your name."

"Not a problem kiddo. I'm Sonic."

"Mister Sonic! Do you want to get ice cream with us? Since you helped me find my mommy?"

"Uh, if it's okay with your mom then sure!"

Of course she agrees and little you grasps Sonic's hand to tug him towards a nearby ice cream stand

"Hey, slow down kid!... Wow, can't believe I just said that."

You happily eat your ice cream as Sonic chatters on about his past adventures to you

Meanwhile, Sonic's ice cream has melted to the ground vause he just won't stop talking long enough to eat any

He loves having such an attentive audience and you love hearing his regales of excitement

As the sun starts to dip below the ground, your mother has you say goodbye to your new friend

As Sonic dashes off in the opposite direction, he can't help thinking back to your happy giggles as you held your ice cream cone

He hopes to see you again soon

Shadow:

Shadow doesn't particularly like you at first

One day, he's standing under the shade of a large willow tree overlooking a small pond

He's so lost in his thoughts, he doesn't hear the crunching of grass under little sneakers

"Excuse me, mister. You're in my spot!"

He opens one eye to glance in your direction and huffs in annoyance

"I don't see your name on it."

"Yeah-huh! It's right there, see?"

Sure enough, Shadow turns his head to see two initials sloppily carved into the bark of the willow's trunk

Rolling his eyes, Shadow opted to ignore your presence and stared out over the water

"So are you gunna move, or what?"

Shadow's ear twitched but he made no move to respond

"Fine, you can stay, but don't think about making this a regular occurrence!"

"Big words for such a little girl."

He cocks his brow at you tauntingly and you puff your chest out in turn

"I make all A's in my English class." You snap back at him

Shadow smirks at your sassy tone and goes back to staring at the pond

You sit quietly at the base of the willow tree for a few minutes before taking out a picture book from your backpack

You start reading out loud and Shadiw growls in irritation, doing his best to block out your voice

But he can't help but listen in as you slowly pronounce each word shown on the little book and gets the urge to correct you every time you stumble or pause on a word

"I look up at the ... bri...br..."

"Brightest."

You look up to see Shadow now standing over you, arms crossed

"It's pronounced brightest."

You smile a toothy grin at him and continue your book

"I look up at the brightest star..."

It goes on like that for nearly an hour as you pull book after book from you little backpack with Shadow glancing down at you every time you a mistake and then gently correcting you

It soon starts getting dark and you say your goodbyes to the black and red hedgehog before dashing off towards your house

Shadow doesn't respond, but watches you leave before smiling softly at your fading figure

He definitely was going to make this a regular occurence

Silver

Silver decides to enjoy the beauty and nature of Sonic's timeline by taking a hike through a national park

He's taking in the breathtaking scenery of the canyons when he suddenly hears a terrified scream

Now completely alert, Silver races over to the sound to investigate

He's confused to find no one around, surrounded on all sides by trees save for a steep drop-off overlooking the canyons

He hears a strained "Help!" and carefully looks over the edge of the cliff to see a little human girl clinging tightly to a tree root jutting out from the rock

"Don't worry, I'll help you!" He reassures before focusing on your small body

A soft cyan glow surrounds you and you frip the root tight

You let out another shriek at the deeling of being lifted in the air, but your hold on the root remained firm

"Sweetie, you have to let go of the branch."

"No, I'll fall!" You cry out fearfully

"I'm not gonna let you fall, I promise. But you need to let go."

You finally open your eyes, which you had squeezed tightly shut before, and stared up inti Silver's golden eyes

He smiles at you assuredly, his hands glowing a soft blue

You reluctantly loosened your grip and feel yourself being lifted higher

You slowly release the tree root and steadily rise in the air until your feet can finally touch the ground

The flow dissipates from your body and you run over to tackle the white hedgehog in a hug

He laughs and returns the gesture gingerly, patting your back as you sobbed into his chest fur

You eventually let go of him

"You saved me. Thank you so much."

"Heh, it was nothing."

He walks you over to a nearby help station where a pair of worried parents are frantically asking for you

He bids you farewell and goes off to continue his hike, but not before glancing back to see you smiling widely up at your parents, skipping along the path

He smiles and turns away

'What a cute kid'

#sonic headcanons #shadow the hedgehog #silver the hedgehog #sonic the hedgehog x reader #shadow the hedgehog x reader #silver the hedgehog x reader #child!reader

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terubakudan · 3 years

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My Lesbian Experience with Loneliness by Nagata Kabi - Book Review and Impressions

(light reflection) Perfect :D Hoping Tumblr doesn't flag me for this xD

Ok, I'm going to start this off with 'this is probably the first and only book review I'm going to do' xD Because I rarely do read books now, and just as rarely buy them. Also, I would have preferred to buy the English version but alas they only had the Chinese version in stock ^^"

Stumbling upon this on the Internet, I was immediately compelled to buy this, as if I knew I would love it and that Nagata's story would resonate with me.

【Short Version】 I can't recommend this book enough, it doesn't matter what sexuality you are or from what culture are you. Nagata makes sure to tell an honest and 'naked' (without embellishments) portrait of her own personal experiences. How she herself is a college drop-out (having only graduated from high school), pushed herself to live/work while struggling with depression and eating disorders, not being sure of what she wants and feeling that she doesn't 'deserve' things, realizing her own sexuality in that she likes girls, and just not feeling 'good enough'...all through her cutesy and unassuming art style.

I will say again though, cutesy art style aside, the book deals with some very heavy topics. Nagata is very honest and doesn't shy away from the gritty details, and I admire her all the more for doing so. Many yaoi and yuri comics often portray an unrealistic and fetishistic view of the LGBTQ+ community whereas Nagata's story is much more grounded and sincere. This is not an easy read, but it's not an overly depressive one either. Nagata literally struggled for years with her mental health, but ultimately found light on the other side. Not mainly through the help of others, but through her own choice to forgive and love herself.

5/5⭐ Definitely recommend and would read again. And if I could, I'd give Nagata a big hug and a heartfelt 'thank you' for sharing her story.

【Long Version】 While it's written primarily from an Asian (particularly Japanese) perspective, Nagata's experiences are ones that should resonate with anyone who has been through the same or similar things, regardless of one's personal background. And I myself, while being fortunate enough to not have gone through eating disorders or self harm, am no exception.

I grew up in an Asian (Taiwanese/Chinese Filipino) household, while my parents weren't Tiger Parents (no offense but fuck Amy Chua for thinking that's a proper way of raising your children), they still had certain expectations on their children: to find a good husband/wife, have a good education, have a 'stable' career, etc. And while I love my parents very much, I'd be lying if I said there weren't any times where I felt they were smothering me, there weren't any times where they kept on nagging and bugging me for very trivial details. My biggest pet peeve: guilt-tripping me just for wanting to spend time alone.

"For me, my parents' opinion of me is absolute." (NOTE: While I won't be providing exact translations of the excerpts I used here, I'll do my best to summarize the gist of them.)

At the same time, I cared very much about their opinion of me. I made it a point to do well in school, to do things according to their wishes, and just like Nagata, I didn't know what I wanted. This even extended to caring about others' opinion of me, more than my own. In my freshman year of college, I 'went along' with being friends with someone, who while was nice to me, turned out to be a manipulative bitch skilled in passive-aggressiveness xD Being half-Taiwanese/half-Filipino, it was hard to fit in since people always treated me differently, it didn't occur to me I could be choosy with friends, I thought as long as they were 'nice' to me, that would do.

Asian culture is largely a collective one, where we define ourselves by our relationships with others, compared with Western culture (primarily America, I'll be using America as a reference point) where individualism is absolute, where you define yourself as you like. In Asia, it's also normal for children to still live in the same house as their parents well into adulthood, compared with Americans who are expected to move out the house once they finish high school or start college, and they're quite literally 'on their own', having to pay their own tuition, rent, etc. Where I live (Taiwan), it's normal for adults to continue relying on their parents financially well until college. Nagata for instance, while saying her parents really make her feel so pressured, is grateful that she still had a home to stay in (and she's 28!).

If you ask me though, neither a collectivist culture or an individualist culture is absolutely good nor bad. Each have their own pros and cons, and both Asian culture and Western culture could learn a thing or two from each other.

After going through quite a few job applications, one of the interviewers tells her "Ganbatte!" (You can do it!) after Nagata tells her what she really wants is to be a manga artist.

And sometimes that's all we need really, a small gesture or kind remark can do wonders. Even if there's no base or reason for it, it's something worth believing in.

I often have doubts if I'm doing what I really want, if I chose the right major for college, if I'm doing the right thing, if I'm 'good enough'. I didn't grow up with much self-esteem as a kid, and often derived my value from others. But even at my lowest times, a 'you're doing ok' was very reassuring to me, be it from family, strangers, or people I care about. Sometimes that's exactly what we need, it may be small but it could be the difference between continuing to wallow in depression or re-evaluating and choosing to be better to oneself.

I find it's really important to know, that however alone you may feel sometimes, there are other people out there going through the exact same thing. It's something universal, and while a lot of things are really unfair in life, each person has their own lot or burden to deal with. I have a Taiwanese friend who, while being more financially well-off than me, has terrible parents. And I mean parents who are quite so literally toxic, unsupportive of her, and would outright say the worst things to their own daughter.

How depression and anxiety can feel sometimes, we can literally feel like it's impossible to breathe and be in a state of disconnection from the world.

"The sounds that invaded my ears occupied my empty brain, making me unable to think at all."

If you only did what your parents asked you to do, wouldn't days like those be very painful? In the end, only you can understand what you really want.

Nagata's art style is one I would describe as simple, cute, and effective. I personally think had her story been drawn in a more serious style, it would have been even harder to read, much less finish. It's also a choice that has artistic appeal to me, serious subject matter juxtaposed with a 'kawaii' art style.

Nagata also depicts very well her mental state and thoughts throughout her struggle and journey to self-actualization. Depression is a really tough thing to deal with, and sometimes we don't even realize that we have it or if we do, refuse to acknowledge it. In Asian cultures especially, mental health has always been something of a taboo subject and there is a very heavy social stigma associated with it. Nagata herself even said that her parents seemingly refused to acknowledge that their daughter's mental health was in a state of distress. In Japan, there is a concept called gaman (我慢), which is described as 'enduring the seemingly unbearable with patience and dignity', and while it is portrayed as an ideal virtue that inspires perseverance, it can be a source of heavy pressure for others. Gaman also means that you are expected to suppress whatever emotion or negative feelings you have, often for the sake of others and no matter how tough the situation becomes for you. And while I agree that through gaman you can become more selfless for others, it shouldn't have to come at the expense of your own well-being.

I was quite fortunate to have grown up in a more liberal Asian household, but even when it came to mental health, our family also adopted the same kind of attitude towards it, by carrying on as if nothing was wrong, or just not talking about it. And to be honest, there were numerous times I wished we had been more open about what was bothering ourselves at that time. Talking and being open about your feelings is not a 'weakness' but something incredibly brave to do, and it's my wish for that to slowly become more acceptable in Asian cultures, which I know is kind of a stretch, but it doesn't hurt to hope.

Nagata makes the decision to clean herself up, by taking a bath everyday, habitually exercising, and no longer wearing worn-out clothes.

Depression especially can be a bitch. It deprives you even of your physiological needs, like your need for food. Nagata had to struggle with that on top of eating disorders for a long ten years. She ate so little and even felt that she didn't 'deserve' to eat, and at one point, anorexia became hyperphagia, and she would feel so guilty for eating almost expired/expired food. Things that would otherwise be simple to do also end up becoming difficult/impossible to do, like taking care of your personal hygiene, getting up from bed, doing simple tasks etc.

Thankfully, after Nagata realizes that she never truly 'valued herself', she starts to turn over a new leaf. Even just starting with cleaning herself up, she takes this as a form of 'valuing oneself' and her mood starts to improve, which her family also points out. In the end, taking care of yourself is not a selfish thing to do, it can even make you a better person who is there for others.

Nagata meets up with the female escort she hired, as a means to experience human sexuality, which she had always repressed her curiosity for and treated as a taboo subject. (NOTE: And I'm glad that she met a really nice girl for her first time too!)

Sex and sexuality is also a subject that I feel is hard to talk about sometimes, which I think also owes itself to most Asian cultures being relatively conservative about it. I myself have only recently identified as bisexual, which I attribute to internalized homophobia, not wanting to admit I was into girls too. And to be honest, 'coming out' is something I'm still uncomfortable about, because I don't want to risk my relationship with my family and it's still something I would choose to be selective about with colleagues and friends. I'm grateful though that as crazy the Internet can be sometimes, it can be quite accepting and tolerant towards things that we wouldn't otherwise discuss with even the closest people in our circle. Nagata's memoir ended up capturing the hearts of many readers ever since she first published it on Pixiv.

Exploring your sexuality doesn't have to be scary, it should be something exciting and liberating. Nagata decided to take matters into her own hands, and while the days leading up to the encounter made her really nervous and she even considered not going through with it at all, she willed herself to continue, because she wanted to do this for herself, it would be pointless if she gave up after coming so far in her decision to value herself.

And it's these series of actions that she decided to do that ultimately led to her life turning out for the better, it gave her the courage to do what she always wanted: to be a manga artist, which lead to the publishing of this autobiographical memoir, something she wanted to create that would 'make people want to buy this book' and from her own preference for reading stories that 'speak of secrets people wouldn't want to tell others'.

Nagata mentions what she calls 'honey': something that varies from person to person. It could be your reason for living, that thing that drives/pushes you, or even your sense of belonging. It may not be something permanent, but you can always find yourself a new one. (she mentions the last time she had her 'honey' was during her high school days, and while she has grown apart from the friends she made, she has found her new 'honey' in the form of being a full-time manga artist.)

Nagata stumbles and trips a lot on her way to being a better version of herself, but who doesn't? She admits to things not necessarily being smooth, but at least she's doing better than before. And it's that decision to at least try that counts. We don't have to be perfect, we're all human after all.

TL;DR My Lesbian Experience With Loneliness is a honest, down-to-earth, and ultimately hopeful memoir about the struggles of mental health and learning about one's sexuality. It's an amazing book, and very much worth the buy.

A big thank you if you read through all of this too. I know it's a mess and writing isn't exactly my strong point, but hopefully I've convinced some people out there to give this book a read! Please feel free to share your thoughts and I'd appreciate it very much too if you reblog/like this post.

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massivedrickhead · 4 years

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For the prompt thing and with hope you will feel better - Beca is dyslexic and is having trouble at the rehearsals, she won't say what is wrong even though girls keep asking or sth like that, then Chloe confronting her about it and a lot of fluff?

Hi, thank you for sending this prompt. I think this might be the third time I’ve received this prompt, so I’m assuming they’re all from you? I’m sorry it’s taken me so long to get to it. I’ll be honest, the reason I haven’t done this prompt yet is because I don’t know too much about dyslexia, and I didn’t want to make anything that was insensitive or inaccurate. I hope I’ve been able to do this with sensitivity.

If I haven’t please tell me and I’ll take it down.

Anyway, thank you for the prompt. Enjoy.

This was a mistake, Beca thought, looking down at the sheet of paper Aubrey had just handed her.

Her leg was vibrating and she got that familiar drop in her stomach as she tried to focus on the words on the page in front of her.

“Please make sure this gets filled out and handed back to me by the end of rehearsal,” Aubrey said.

Beca cast her eyes around the room to see the other girls all writing, and her eyes turned back to her own paper.

She tried to make herself focus, tried to make herself read each word so she could complete this form, but the words began swimming together as they so often did, and Beca felt herself getting frustrated. She felt the heat of embarrassment on the back of her neck, felt it spread to her face.

Focus, she told herself.

But by the time her eyes had travelled to the bottom of the page, she realised she hadn’t taken in a word of it.

“Okay, break’s over!” Aubrey called, and Beca shoved the paper in to her bag. She could complete it tonight and bring it in on their next rehearsal.

The rehearsal went smoothly after that. Beca was grateful she already knew the words to the song they were signing, so she didn’t have to rely on the print-out Chloe had handed her.

“I’ll see you ladies tomorrow morning for our next rehearsal,” Aubrey said, after finally calling an end.

“Tomorrow?” Beca asked. “I have to work tomorrow.”

Aubrey sighed. “What does it say on the whiteboard Beca?” She gestured to the scribbled green ink which supposedly laid out the Bellas’ plans for victory.

Beca looked, and again felt that twist in her stomach. Her mouth went dry and her throat seemed to close up. She opened her mouth to speak, but closed it quickly.

“Well?” Aubrey snapped.

“It says a lot of stuff,” Beca replied, her temper getting the better of her. “Tell me which bit is supposed to be important.”

She heard a slow intake of breath coming from the other girls around her.

“You’re a braver woman than I am,” Cynthia Rose muttered.

“We rehearse every day,” Aubrey said, jabbing her finger against the board.

“Okay,” Beca said. “I’m just saying, I have work tomorrow, could we rehearse after?”

“Sure,” Chloe said, preventing what she knew would be tirade of abuse from Aubrey. “What time do you finish?”

“12 pm,” Beca said.

“Perfect,” Chloe replied, grinning. “We’ll start rehearsals at one, if that’s okay with everyone else?”

Everyone else agreed, and they all began to file out of the auditorium.

“Beca,” Aubrey called, looking down at a stack of papers in her hand. “You didn’t give me your sheet.”

“Oh,” Beca said, wondering once again why she was putting herself through this. “I didn’t finish filling it out. I can bring it tomorrow.”

Aubrey raised her eyebrows. “I said I needed it today.”

“It’s fine, Beca,” Chloe said, cutting Aubrey off again. “Just bring it tomorrow.”

Beca shot Chloe a grateful smile, and headed out of the door.

Back in her dorm room, Beca pulled out the sheet of paper Aubrey had wanted her to fill out. She pulled a notebook out of her bag, and slipped the paper behind the sheet of transparent yellow plastic that was clipped into her notebook.

Slowly, the words began to make sense to her, and she filled out the sheet as best she could.

She filled out her name, date of birth, email address and phone number. She listed her allergies, dietary requirements, and gave her clothing sizes so they could order a Bellas uniform for her.

At the end there was a box asking if there was anything else the co-captains needed to be aware of. If there was any medical conditions or disabilities or even learning difficulties that would impact Beca’s ability to rehearse or perform, and if there were any special requirements that they could put in place to help her.

Beca had a suspicion this question had been put in by Chloe.

She tapped her pen against the page, chewing her bottom lip as she thought.

Then she folded the paper in half, and slipped it back into her bag, deciding they didn’t need to know.

After, she spent some time listening to a lecture she’d recorded that morning. She opened up a word document, and made notes of time codes of when her professor talked about something she’d need later, so she’d be able to find it when studying.

By the time she was finished, her eyes were burning and her head was aching. She shut the screen of her laptop, lay back in bed, and found her thoughts landing on Chloe. She couldn’t help but smile.

The redhead had protected her against Aubrey’s wrath in rehearsal. She had looked out for her at the hood night party, making sure she was okay and that she wasn’t getting bothered by Trebles or frat boys.

She knew if there was anyone she could trust with her secret, it would be Chloe.

Without meaning to, her mind wandered to that night in the shower, and she felt her cheeks burn.

She put on some music, and tried to forget about how good Chloe had looked. How good she had sounded.

When that didn’t work, she sat back at her desk, and pulled up her mixing software.

This she knew how to do.

Where words made her feel frustrated and embarrassed, music made her feel free. She understood the waveforms of a sound better than the she would ever understand a written word.

As the two tracks began to blend together, she forgot about everything else.

Everything… except Chloe.

———

“Have you got your form?” Aubrey asked as Beca filed into rehearsal the next afternoon.

Beca pulled the folded sheet from her bag and handed it over.

“Thank you,” Aubrey said, her eyes scanning the page to make sure she hadn’t missed a question. “You were born in 1999?”

“’96,” Beca said.

“Ah ha,” Aubrey said, correcting the form with her pen. “And you’re allergic to ‘dees’?”

A rush of heat travelled up Beca’s back, across her neck and made its way to her face in seconds.

“Bees,” she muttered.

She waited for Aubrey’s snarky comment that she knew must be coming. Waited for that cruel laughter from the other girls that she had heard so often at school.

No laughter came however, and after correcting the spelling error on her form, Aubrey dropped it onto the pile with the other girls’.

Feeling rattled and on edge, Beca went the rest of rehearsal without drawing attention to herself.

She didn’t bite back at Aubrey when she made comments about Beca’s dance ability, or her ‘ear monstrosities’, and she didn’t complain about the outdated song or the lame choreography. When Fat Amy showed her a string of messages on her phone from some guy she was seeing, Beca just smiled and nodded rather than try and struggle through reading them, and she kept just as quiet when Jessica and Ashley started a heated debate about which Hogwarts house was the best.

“You’re quiet today Bec,” Cynthia Rose said as they started packing up to leave. “Everything good?”

“Yeah,” Beca said, surprised she had noticed. “It’s just, you know, a lot. Not used to being around this many people with such strong Harry Potter opinions.”

Cynthia Rose smiled, and nudged her. “Us Slytherins gotta stick together, right?”

“Aren’t they the bad guys?”

Cynthia Rose laughed again and shook her head. “Only if you listen to JKR, and she doesn’t know shit.”

Beca smiled liked she’d understood, and Cynthia Rose left with a wave. She hadn’t read Harry Potter as a child, and had had no desire to read it as a teenager, or watch any of the movies.

She was aware she was missing a world wide phenomenon, but her disdain for popular culture had made it easy for her to pretend that she hadn’t read these books out of choice, and not out of a deep seated fear that she wouldn’t be able to.

It was how she avoided Twilight discussions in high school, when her friends had bombarded her with questions about Edward Vs Jacob. She’d simply replied that it was all lame, and they’d stopped asking for her opinions.

Beca hadn’t realised she’d gotten lost in her own head again, and was simply staring into space, half-way through packing up to leave.

“Earth to Beca?” Chloe said, waving a hand in front of her.

“Sorry,” Beca said, shaking her head slightly.

“Did you go somewhere nice?” Chloe asked. Beca tilted her head in confusion. Chloe tapped her on the forehead. “When you disappeared up there.”

“Oh,” Beca said, laughing. “There’s nothing nice up there, trust me.” She slung her bag over her shoulder.

“You did good today,” Chloe said, walking with Beca as they left the auditorium,

“You’re a very sweet liar,” Beca scoffed.

“You did! I know Aubrey gave you a hard time, but she’s just really obsessive. She wants us to be perfect. She wants to redeem herself,” Chloe said.

“I guess I’d want that too,” Beca replied, remembering the video she’d watched of Aubrey’s last Bellas performance.

“What are you up to right now?” Chloe asked as they walked.

“Nothing,” Beca said.

“You wanna grab dinner?”

“Sure,” Beca replied, trying to stop her grin from overtaking her face.

They arrived at a diner, and the waitress who seated them handed Beca a menu.

She gave it a cursory glance, recognised they sold burgers, and put the menu down.

Chloe studied it for a little longer, her bottom lip caught in her teeth as she read down the list. She glanced up at Beca. “Do I get cheese fries or sweet potato fries?”

“Is that even a question?”

“You’re right,” Chloe said, looking back down. “Cheese fries. Always cheese fries.”

Beca laughed.

“What are we having then?” The waitress asked, holding out a notepad.

“BLT with a side order of cheese fries, please,” Chloe said, still looking down at her menu. “Oh, and a strawberry milkshake.”

“Can I get a burger with fries and a coke please?” Beca asked.

“What kind of burger?”

“Sorry?”

“We have like five different kinds,” the waitress said, pointing to the burger section on the menu.

“Right,” Beca said, a nervous laugh escaping her as she looked at the menu, trying to make sense of the words that were now jumbling together.

“Can you give us another minute to decide?” Chloe asked, when enough time had elapsed for the waitress to begin to look impatient.

Beca’s cheeks were burning when she felt Chloe tap her foot with her own.

“You want me to tell you what kind they have?” Chloe asked.

“I can read them,” Beca said, her voice coming out harsher than she’d intended. “I’m not stupid.”

“I know that,” Chloe said. “I’m sorry, I was just trying to help.”

Beca sighed. “No, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to snap.” She rubbed her hand against her forehead.

“I didn’t mean to imply you were stupid, or that you couldn’t read,” Chloe said. “I’m sorry if I’m out of line here, but… You’re dyslexic, right?”

Beca’s head shot up. “How did you…”

“My brother is, and my dad,” Chloe said. “You mixed up your d’s and b’s and your 9’s and 6’s on your information sheet. You looked like you were struggling to fill it in during rehearsal, which is why I’m guessing you took it home? And when Aubrey asked you to read something from the whiteboard, you got kinda defensive.”

Beca ran a hand through her hair. “You’re pretty observant,” she said.

“You can call it like it is, I’m a bit of a creep,” Chloe said, smiling when she heard Beca laugh. “You don’t need to be embarrassed about it, it’s pretty common.”

“That didn’t stop me from getting teased in school when I couldn��t read aloud or when I failed every spelling test. The fact that it’s common didn’t stop my dad from calling me stupid every chance he got, or stop my teachers saying I needed to try harder or -” she swallowed, trying not to cry, “or saying I was slow.”

“They shouldn’t have said that,” Chloe said, her voice soft. “None of them should have said any of that.” She took Beca’s hand, and then saw the waitress making her way over. “What kind of burger do you want?”

“Cheese and bacon?”

“BBQ sauce?”

“No,” Beca said, pulling a face.

“She’ll have the classic with bacon, thanks,” Chloe said, before the waitress could ask.

“With fries?”

“Yeah,” Beca said. “Thank you,” she added, once the waitress had left.

“You shouldn’t feel ashamed about needing help, Beca. People need help with all kinds of things, nobody is born perfect,” Chloe said.

“Easy for you to say,” Beca said. “Look at you.”

Chloe cocked her head. “I had to wear headgear at school, because my teeth were overcrowded and my jaw was misaligned. I had to wear it for three years, can you imagine how often I got picked on for that? My lab partner Joe had scoliosis as a kid, so he had to wear a back brace. My sister had to wear a patch to correct a lazy eye. My brother, my dad, my uncle, my bio professor, all have dyslexia. Aubrey’s brother has ADHD. My mom had bi-polar,” Chloe said, her voice taking on a kind of fierceness as she listed these people off. “Everyone needs help with something, and receiving it isn’t a sign of weakness. It isn’t something you should feel embarrassed about.”

Beca looked uncomfortable. “I’m sorry,” she said. “I know dyslexia is common. I know I shouldn’t feel embarrassed about it, but I do. I can just remember being a kid and having to stand in front of a class, trying to read out loud. The other kids would giggle and sometimes the teacher would too. They’d shove books at me, or write mean stuff on notes, and tell me to read them.” Beca wiped away a stray tear. “And my dad…” She shook her head. “Well… the less said about him the better.”

Chloe squeezed her hands again. “You don’t have to make life harder for yourself by refusing to let people help you. I’m sorry that you had to go through all that growing up, but the Bellas aren’t going to be like that. Aubrey will understand if you need lyrics sheets to be printed on different paper or with a different font. She’ll get it if you’d rather we told you information instead of writing it down for you to read it.” Beca scoffed again. “Beca, she knows. The second she saw your d’s and b’s mixed up, she understood. She can be a bit intense, but she isn’t a cruel person. Why do you think we put that question on the form?”

“I figured you put it there,” Beca mumbled.

Chloe shook her head. “It was her idea. I agreed, obviously, but she thought of it. Look, I won’t tell anyone about this. I won’t even confirm Aubrey’s suspicions. But I promise, only good things will come of you being open with us. Won’t it be easier to not have to hide this?”

“Yeah,” Beca said, still looking uncomfortable. “That’ll be good. But… I”m just not good at sharing. I’m not good at being open and vulnerable.”

“What if I told them?”

Beca met her eyes and nodded, ever so slightly, and the waitress brought over their food.

“Okay,” Chloe said. “I’ll take care of it. We don’t have to talk about this heavy stuff anymore.”

“Thank you,” Beca said, feeling like a weight had been lifted. “Oh, by the way, when I called you perfect earlier? I was trying to flirt with you.”

Chloe grinned. “I know you were.”

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