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#but i wont blame myself entirely
4arconinoma · 5 months
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I need to be autistic about Diamond is Unbreakable again its been too long Did you know that i love Jojos biarre adventure part four diamond is unbreakable did you know that about me did you know that
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snekdood · 5 months
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i just think hes neat
#im basically just broly if he was smaller and shorter and whinier with elf ears#so what im saying is im basically broly and kish fused dsfnbvsvdhgfshgdgfhv#kish minus all the weird creepy shit#maybe links in there too. oh oh and beast boy obvs.#idk who else#maybe a hint of goku bc im worried i have the same dumb drive to challenge myself and push my limits or whatever#at least i wont endanger my family............................................................ right? right???#my bf was wondering why i identify w broly bc of him blowing up that one planet or whatever#(never mind the entire galaxy he blew up tho ig) but thats obviously not the reason.#its the whole 'becoming an invincible destructive force of nature that has bouts of wanting to Break Things often and usually bc#of being pushed to that edge by other people' thing#you dont get it u-u i need to go to one of those places where i can SMASH shit u--u. im just that kinda guy u---u.#and sometimes it is fun to imagine smashing ur enemies even though you probably would never do that and in fact imagining it#satisfies you enough kinda deal yaknow#as cheesy and on brand as it is for me rn i just love destroying shit and i always have im sorry im this way blame god ik i have been#maybe he shouldnt have made the sound of rocks crumbling and glass breaking etc sound so good huh? ya ever think of that??#anyways i find when i suppress these emotions it just boils up until i explode which i think only leads to more of a chance of me actually#hurting someone instead. when i pretend to be cute and flowery and people pleasey- it only makes me more resentful. but thats the#only version of me people seem willing to tolerate. and i dont think they realize how much THAT makes me resent them too#im not an innocent frail delicate uwu bean i will literally eat you 🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪#idk. its not like i want ppl to fear me either. but sometimes it feels like thats the only way to stop ppl from disrespecting me#maybe if ppl didnt assume me being nice and Not trying to start fights is a sign of being weak maybe i wouldnt feel like its necessary#to intimidate ppl to scare them away from me.#i promise babe you are Not getting away with it- i just know better not to start a scene. especially among other whities like me#yall will be vocally violent about whoever behind their backs over and over and if im the guy who actually confronts you suddenly im#the only one being an asshole. im simply playing YOUR game with you. you wanna be dishonest and hide behind a fake smile then so will i#and ill just sit here and wait until you break. and then everyone can call you crazy and confrontational instead!#i hate white people (yes ik i am a white people... doesn't mean i cant hate the way a lot of white ppl act)#things could be so much easier if you weren't a coward and just spoke your mind about how you distrust me and how quick you were#to find reasons to back up your mistrust. we coulda ended it there and avoided eachother. but now we gotta pretend we like eachother ig.
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absintheanflare · 1 year
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AWFUL fucking first day in cali
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poison-note · 2 years
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Bro I love doing group projects by my damn self
god damn this shit sucks
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buggachat · 10 months
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To be clear, I goddamn hated the finale on first watch. I was withering in my seat. My heart had dropped to my stomach. I had no fucking idea what I was watching in that final scene lmao
and then Adrien said "when Ladybug gave me the rings—" and I was like— wait. LADYBUG? LADYBUG STILL EXISTS?
I THOUGHT THE ENTIRE TIMELINE HAD BEEN REWRITTEN 😭😭😭😭 I THOUGHT LADYBUG AND CHATN OIR DIDNT UFCKING EXIST uNTIL ADRIEN SAID THAT I WAS SO SO SO SCARED
and then I realized, oh wait. This isn't a complete utopian timeline rewrite. This is just a timeskip of a few months and Mme Bustier is just a kickass mayor. In fact, she's only mayor BECAUSE it's still the same timeline. And then I realized, hey, wait, if they didn't rewrite the timeline, then how tf is Emilie casually there with no questions?
And then I realized she was wearing black. And Félix was there. And I remembered Amelie exists.
Basically, I went into the finale chanting to myself "it's okay, it's okay... they probably wont bring Emilie back... they probably won't rewrite the entire timeline permanently.... right? please....", even though I didn't actually expect it to happen, but just because I was terrified that it could. And apparently that fear actually got to me so much that I misinterpreted the episode as being everything I didn't want it to be... when... it actually wasn't that at all
anyway, all of this is to say, everything in the episode happens so fast that it confused and terrified me at first. And when I realized what had happened, my opinion went from "my year is ruined" to "oh. well. okay. kind of disappointing, I guess". And then I kept thinking about it, and the ending, and all that is set up and rewatching the scenes and all the loose ends still in place and.... i realized I loved it?
like, every time I think about this finale, I love it more. every time i rewatch a scene, I get a little obsessed. this episode went from my nightmare to actually really really cool to me, and I'm still kind of reeling from it
Basically, this is why I've been kind of passionately defending the finale— not because I think people who don't like it are """dumb""" or anything, I don't blame people at all for that, and I totally get the confusion. I was confused too. And I know I'm not the only one who went in preparing themselves for the worst, or went in with very specific expectation on what will happen, because this finale has been long awaited for so long. I think everyone was shocked with how it ended. I think most people probably startled at Amelie's face (it's so easy to forget she exists....)
Anyways, I started this post basically as an apology for if I seem too aggressive or defensive about the finale. Because I get it! I get hating it! I get being disappointed or frustrated or confused! Part of why I'm so defensive is because I have all the arguments so ready on the tip of my tongue because I had the very same argument with myself already 😭 So I'm sorry if any of my posts came off as too aggressive and in advance for any future posts that might. I promise promise promise I'm not trying to make anyone feel bad for having bad opinions on the finale! I just think this episode is really cool and the fact I related to a lot of the nay-sayers makes it easy to feel so impassioned about it.
But this post is getting off the rails and I'm just gonna let it, because some of my regrets w my participation in fandom is that I find myself chickening out of actually talking about my thoughts on episodes a lot. I get kind of overwhelmed and overthink everything after I've posted it and I'm a shy person. But my inbox is closed and this is the season 5 finale and I want to ramble and ramble so I will allow myself this
Basically, I went in with some very specific expectations for this episode. We all know about the Hawkmoth defeat story. Many of us have read it in fics over and over again, it was teased in Chat Blanc, we all know what we expect, we all know our favorite beats from it.
And what actually happened....... met virtually none of those beats. (For me, at least).
Like, Adrien wasn't there for the final episode. At all. He was completely absent from the confrontation. He never found out his father was Hawkmoth. He got his rings, but he never found out he was a sentimonster. He is living in the dark.
Ladybug confronted Monarch... alone. Which is sad, when so much of the series is dedicated to the partnership of her and Chat Noir. Them against the world....... and Monarch was "defeated" with nary a Chat Noir in sight.
The whole entire "Gabriel is known as a hero" thing. I don't think anybody was expecting that. Absolutely shocking.
The fact Marinette would lie to Adrien like that. The fact she's keeping so much from him. The fact everyone is. SO MANY people in Adrien's life (Marinette, Plagg, Nathalie, Felix, Amelie, Kagami, probably Alya, maybe more I'm not thinking of....) are just... lying to him, now. He is so in the dark. He knows nothing.
But.........
I kind of like that I didn't predict nearly any of this. I like that it caught me off guard. I love how this show just completely baffles me at every turn, how it will present concepts and ideas to me that I've never read a fic about.
In retrospect, Chat Noir being absent from the final battle... makes sense. It actually makes a lot of sense, if I think about it, because... there is only one possible way that could've gone, right? Chat Noir would not be allowed to have the emotional implosion that he would have to have. This is devastating. This is SO devastating. This is the entire shattering of Adrien's entire world we're talking about, and Chat Blanc is the only real way for that to end. Adrien has an emotional implosion in front of Monarch, he gets akumatized, it turns into an emotion explosion, extinction event. The end. We've already seen it.
And........ even if it didn't end that way, even if he managed to avoid akumatization...... how could the finale satisfyingly end on that note? How could it end in any semblance of a "wrapped up" way, at the very start of Adrien's emotional breakdown? It couldn't. I wouldn't WANT it to. In retrospect, Adrien finding out his dad is Monarch and then.... what? The season ends on a close-up of him crying? The season ends with a time-skip to the new school year where they skipped his entire grieving period!? I would HATE that, actually. I would hate that. I thought I wanted it, but I would hate it. I would hate it so so so much.
What's kind of amazing is that the finale ended with Monarch being defeated.... but Adrien still has those realizations to make. He still has those betrayals to come to terms with. There is time for him to make these realizations, for him to come to these conclusions, perhaps one at a time, perhaps in a more controlled environment.... and that gets me far, far more excited for the seasons to come than an episode that tried to wrap it all up in the last 5 minutes.
Also, the reason Adrien didn't go to the final battle was because he feared becoming Chat Blanc. He didn't know the truth to it, didn't understand that literally, yes, that's what would have happened if he was there, even if he hadn't been under a nightmare curse. But he still knew. He still expected it. He willingly chose to sit it out, no matter how much he hated it, because he knew. And there's something kind of powerful to that, I think, of Adrien making a choice that is so unequivocally the Correct choice, even more than he realized. And the strength it took for him to make that decision...... damn.
As for the lies and the Gabriel statue? I... it's upsetting, but it's supposed to be. And I believe it. I absolutely believe it. I 10000% believe Marinette would keep the secret of Monarch's identity to herself to try to save Adrien the pain. I 10000% believe that the population could easily be led to believe a famous billionaire is a hero. I 10000% believe that Adrien would WANT to believe it. I 10000% believe Tomoe would take advantage of it.
And I can't wait to see that illusion crumble.
Also.... this is the beginning of The Lila arc.
And the Lila arc begins on........ Marinette telling the biggest, boldest face lie she ever told. The Lila arc begins on the most extreme city-wide illusion we've ever seen. It begins on such a huge fabrication and....
..... it's Marinette's lie.
............ and Lila knows that it's a lie.
I'm
!!?!?!?!
This is so fucking cool???? The irony here??? the deceit???? All these loose ends, all the possible confrontations, all the ways this could GO. I don't know where the show is taking this, obviously, because nobody ever can predict where this show is going apparently (and I love it for that), but oh my god. I'm imagining all the fics I could read about this. all the fics I could write. all the thoughts and scenarios that this finale has provided me with to daydream about as I go to sleep.
Adrien, going through the motions of life. Looking up to his father as a hero, despite the fact the last time he saw him, Adrien was sobbing, in tears, and cursing his name. Adrien, after all the abuse he was subject to, having to look up at a statue of his father and...... be forced to think that maybe he was wrong about his father. But he's not wrong. He WASN'T wrong. He just THINKS that he is. His father is going to continue to loom over his life in ways I never expected post-hawkmoth. Adrien's relationship with Gabriel has not ended, a new and terrifying and horrible new chapter of it has simply begun, and Adrien is still as manipulated by his father's ghost as he was by his father himself.
THAT'S. WILD!!!
also, Adrien now believes that MONARCH MURDERED HIS FATHER. Chat Noir now believes that his greatest nemesis KILLED HIS FATHER. CHAT NOIR, resident self-sacrificer, believes that HIS FATHER was a HERO who DIED FIGHTING MONARCH. Adrien thinks that maybe he should be more like his father— more like his father who died in battle. This is. Not Good. For Adrien.
And it's Marinette that started this. Well intentioned Marinette, who doesn't really understand the extent of the horrors. Marinette, Adrien's girlfriend, the person he trusts most. She did this.
And, I mean.... god. I totally get how this sucks for a lot of people, because it's objectively upsetting.... but I LOVE lovesquare tension. Season 4 is probably my favorite season for that reason alone (still mulling over if season 5 beat it for me). I love the relationship drama, I love that it's in character drama, I love how it fits everything we know about them sososo well, I love that it's horrible and it's terrible and it's awful and it's all because Marinette loved Adrien too much to want to hurt him.
I was worried no reveal would mean that season 6 would just be... what? adrienette fluff? not that I don't love that, but where's the drama? well. there it is. that's the drama.
I need to stop typing this. I know this is abysmally long and ranty and if you read all of this then I'm sorry. But I wanted to get some of my thoughts out.
But basically, I was expecting a lot of things for the finale.
In my best case scenario, it would somehow, miraculously tie up and address all the loose ends with Adrien's angst and character arc in two episodes.... and then end with me totally satisfied, ready to only half-heartedly watch season 6 like it was just a small dessert after the main course.
And I already described my worst case scenario (my first impression of the episode lmao)
But it wasn't that. I was expecting a series finale, but I got a season finale. And I love season finales. I love how they keep me wanting more. I love how excited I am for season 6, because in both my best and worst case scenarios, I honestly didn't expect to be. I love all the new ideas and thoughts and scenarios swirling around in my brain. And even if season 6 doesn't address some of the things I want addressed, I'm so excited to see the creative content in this fandom that DOES
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WIBTA if I got my cousin a gift?
My family does a secret santa style gift exchange by age group. This year, someone made a group chat to put gift suggestions/wishlists in. Some people are more specific, some people drop their entire amazon wishlist, whatever. I gave two ideas for mine.
The cousin i got asked for a gift card or money. Hes been pulling away from the family for a while, and while I cant fully disagree and have been tempted myself, its a little frustrating when he shows up for the gift exchange and immediately leaves.
The other thing is that this cousin is spoiled af - hes got a nicer car than me, and I know that he gets all of his money from his dad. Kid has been materialistic and image-obsessed for years, but I also know how hard it is to be gay in the area he lives, so I cant really blame him from going full Arianna Grande Fan stereotype. Ive tried to talk to him over the years, try to be a supportive older cousin, but he wont engage with anyone, even when I’m trying to find common ground. Like the only conversation weve had in the last year was “i like your nails” “thanks”
He also took a while to respond to the group chat, and I ordered something on black friday for him (nail related) before he said he wanted money.
Im just torn. On one hand, I feel like money is a shitty, impersonal gift, and something he has plenty of. On the other hand, he made his wish clear. And on the third hand, I already placed the order and cant return due to the sales. Would it be an ah move to try to give him a gift that I think he would enjoy and that we could connect over if it means ignoring his request?
What are these acronyms?
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fiveloml · 2 years
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the umbrella academy x reader. “ i could never stay mad at you. “ [ gender neutral reader. ]
─ ✧ tua characters after / during an argument and want to apologize.
─ ✧ first fic !!! hoping it doesnt flop to hell :'o hi everyone im froyo and im obsessed with tua!! i also use they/them for klaus :]
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@ ─ luther hargreeves ☂︎ number 1.
LUTHER quietly knocks on your door, hearing your voice say “ come in “ is his sign to walk in with an assortment of your favorite snacks. he had a weak smile that disappeared once he noticed the tears in your eyes after the argument, he places the snacks on a nearby table and slowly sits next to you on the bed to see if you'd move away. you didn't.
so he went with a long apology, explaining how he was wrong and that he was sorry that he hurt you. after it, he gave you a gentle kiss on your knuckles and hoped you forgave him. “ you're so sweet “
@ ─ diego hargreeves ☂︎ number 2.
DIEGO is a honest man, he wont lie to himself but he felt such a strong urge to prove that he was right in the argument. not realizing he began to hurt you in the process, and the second he realized ─ he stopped.
he notices the tears in your eyes when you looked away, balling your fists as you figured it was useless to argue. you turned your heel and before you could walk away, a gentle hand grabbed your wrist as you looked at diego. his face filled with regret. “ wait─ i want to apologize. “
@ ─ allison hargreeves ☂︎ number 3.
“ i heard a rumor that you- “ ALLISON covered her mouth in realization, watching your expression turn into one of betrayal. “ you promised not to rumor me. “ you sniffed, but allison was the one to run out the room.
once she was back into her room, she felt sick to her stomach. you were the one good thing allison has ever had in.. forever, so to betray your trust in that way had guilt piling up like no other.
after a few hours, allison had approached you while you rested on the couch of the living room. “ i can't get you to forgive me overnight.. but i can try to make things right to help fix us. “
@ ─ klaus hargreeves ☂︎ number 4.
KLAUS drowned out your arguing by covering their ears, muttering nonsense as you tried to get your point across. “ klaus please just listen─ “ you tried to reason, but they only pressed their hands against their ears even more. “ i'm only worried about you! why dont you understand that?! “ you snapped, tears in your eyes as klaus suddenly froze up in shock.
“ you.. are worried? “ they said softly, putting their hand on your cheek as you nod in their touch. “ i'm sorry.. so sorry. i didn't want to make you worry for me. “ klaus whispered, pressing their forehead against yours with a cheeky smile.
@ ─ five hargreeves ☂︎ number 5.
FIVE was a.. difficult man to get to know well. he avoided things that were too touchy or that involved attachment, so when you came into his life ─ it was hard to adjust to such things he avoided his entire life.
so this lead to arguments, mostly one sided on five's end since he was simply worried. “ what were you doing out there?! you could've seriously gotten hurt. “ he said worridly with a tint of frustration. “ i'm not weak, just cause i'm not like your superhero family doesn't mean i cant defend myself. “ you crossed your arms, but he grabbed you by the sides of your arms and looked straight into your eyes. “ exactly, you aren't like us! “ his face changed once he realized what that could be interpreted as.
you wanted to walk away but five's grip on you kept you in place, he rested his head on your shoulder and said nothing else. he was showing that he was vulnerable and could only show this side to you. five was bad at the whole relationship gig.. but you knew he was trying his best for you. “ i know you worry, but i can handle myself. okay? “ you sigh, patting his back as you pulled him into a hug. “ okay. “
@ ─ ben hargreeves ☂︎ number 6. [ if he were alive ]
it was less an argument, but you can tell the atmosphere was tense after the mission today. BEN was supposed to be scolded by reginald, but instead you took the blame for his mess up. “ i got in the way by being there, i distracted ben. “ you lied to the father of the hargreeves.
“ you're forbidden to see my children, especially ben. leave. “
and so the two have you started meeting in secret, however did not bring up the reason why you were doing this in the first place. causing an aura of silence whenever you two met up. “ why'd you have to take the blame, i could've handled it. “ ben murmurs, leaning on your shoulder as you smile down at him. “ but you dont want to get scolded, right? “ and your theory was confirmed when he didn't answer, but his hand squeezed yours. “ i'm sorry.. i just cant bare to see reginald do that to you. “ ben sighs as you plant a kiss on his forehead.
@ ─ viktor hargreeves ☂︎ number 7.
VIKTOR always distanced himself out of fear he'd get used, especially after what happened with leonard when he was younger. you always reassured him that you have nothing but love for the boy and he knows that you do, but his fears get the best of him at times. “ you aren't safe with me! “ viktor yells, but you only look at him sorrowfully, people have hurt him so much and gets treated like hes nothing.
“ vik.. “ you murmur, walking towards him slowly as he continued to mutter to himself while sobbing. you gently wrap your arms around him, leaning into his chest as you listen to his heart beat quickly, his breathing stabilizing as he began to relax in your touch. “ i'm sorry.. i'm so sorry, i didn't want to snap at you.. “
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wewebaggit · 7 months
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I am already not paying for Netflix and will not support ST either, especially after Shawn Levy's open Zionist approach.
Look, no one is saying they cannot support their family in Israel. But what they are doing is basically sitting in the US and calling for an open ethnic cleansing against Palestinians, while cherry-picking their words and spreading false information. As we speak, Gaza is basically being bombed to death, an entire place has its water, electricity and basic resources being taken from them. It may be easy to post random shit on your accounts with millions of followers while living in rich houses. But the reality doesn't match that and both Levy and Noah should have been more sensible and learned better before posting dumb shit on your accounts.
You are free to hate whoever. N I'm not even gonna bother to defend them cuz it's not my job nor do I base my politics off of teen celebs. That being said I've read his statement that is just as passionate and devoid of the complete understanding of everything of it like other impassioned posts. That's what passionate posts do. They appeal to an emotion. I'm not sitting here expecting him or any other jewish celeb to say yaaaaaas Hamas. Nor am I gonna raise my brows if they speak for the Jewish side of things.
The statement that people read and ran with saying he's calling all Palestinians terrorists is as inaccurate as whatever false info y'all are accusing him of spreading. I do not blame him nor do I defend him and him is a placeholder for any Jew celeb, cuz I do not base my sense of right or wrong on what they're saying. I've never once felt the need to publicly anonymously denounce the people I don't agree with because I don't usually find myself overcompensating for anything.
Israel - Palestine conflict is not new. What's new is this one actor who everyone's expecting to say politically correct shit (which in his mind he might be doing just that 🤷‍♀️) and I believe that expecting this in and of itself is stupid and an easy way to pass the blame and do nothing at all to look good.
Palestinians right to self determination is not affected by what a nobody says. Nor is Israel's stance on continuing on with its policies of decades. The fact that people are busy harping on this one thing cuz apparently the only source of knowledge is insta and therefore maybe it seems like it's a must to react to whatever is seen on insta. Well, I cannot relate.
The fact that you or whoever if there are multiple anons find it necessary to approach me on anon so that I can be derisive towards him and that somehow it is the most important thing to discuss here - well, it is laughably easy to post while sitting in your home with food, water and power while others are wont to dangerously struggle for them. See how that works? My post is and has never been about Israel Palestine at all and was always in response to anon (and fandumb) who's been at it for a while.
Are we truly gonna say that he hasn't always be hated upon for things he's done and not done? Is there a comparable backlash against other celebs? That being said you now stop liking a celeb. Good for you. What does it achieve? Were you following them for their immense knowledge and wisdom of politics and geopolitical conflicts? Then I suggest you do not mourn the loss.
Also the fucking hypocrisy of everyone on this site to wake up like the Undertaker when it's israel/palestine (not even out of much real love for the people affected let me remind you as the argument is centered around fucking Noah schnapp/jewish celebs of all the people) and then no reaction to what happens in third world non-glamorous countries. (The glamorous here is Israel to be clear). And before you say well it's a reaction to what he said. Well there have been reactions based on what he should say or hasn't said, too. So like I'm judging y'all atp. Like what's the issue? Your heart bleeds for victims or does your mouth salivate over taking someone down with that pitchfork?
Why should I engage in an argument that's not based on what is says its about but the subject matter is celeb not the thing celeb is talking about. That being said I won't even be talking about the thing the celeb is talking about because there's shit happening in the world all the time and I have my opinions on all of them and I choose to keep them to myself lest people read what's not there and call me a genocidal dogwhister. There are 2 sides to a genocide. (And I'm not saying like 2 sides to a story. But a victim and a perpetrator) And the supporters of both sides will have unfortunate reading comprehension if it means they can take down a nobody in the business of nothing to make themselves feel morally superior.
So should he (Shawn and Noah) be more responsible or considerate or whatever? Idk. They can be or they can choose to show their ass. My respect (if any) for them never did rest on what their political beliefs were because, at the risk of appearing repetitive, I don't care.
I do care about the proxy hatred being spewed under the guise of sloganeering though. I'm way too used to it. It happens on the daily where I come from. I'm not gonna pretend y'all are angels. I see this for what it is.
So good on you for not supporting ST and staying true to your beliefs and code. That is always a respectable position to take. Sometimes people are just not in your position. Like you might not be in theirs. As you so pointed out.
TLDR: I trust celebs to post dumb shit. Where have you been to have expected differently?
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milknhonies · 1 month
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Please someone lobotomise me. I don't want to have big human thoughts. I'm done. Just put me in a care home and let me go through dementia as I enjoy puzzles all day. I'd rather be at peace and forget things than have to continue feeling like I'm constantly drowning.
I hate myself and I hate that I struggle to fit into society.
I just want to be loved and I thought I'd be married with kids by now (yes I'm only 22 but I'm a Christian virgin who struggles with the physical feelings of being comfortable with sex other than the smut I write and read.)
I thought men were real- I thought men were romantic and worshipped women. I didn't realise how objectified and then shamed we are by men who behave like animals.
I don't want to work and I think that's a massive reason I'm having such a bad breakdown. I want to be a Pilates wife. I want to be at home baking and cooking and meal planning and loving a husband. I want to mend his work uniform and sit and rub his feet while he oats my head and tells me I'm his angel.
I don't want to work in disability care where my tolerance is so minimal to loud, overstimulated (overstimulating for me) aggressive clients. Or work with babies that scream and cry and hit along with angry parents that yell at you the moment something goes wrong. I wish job employment agencies would stop trying to pressure me into these roles. I KNOW THEYRE UNDERSTAFFED ALREADY SO IM NOT RIDING A SINKING BOAT- no THANKS
I just want my dad. I just want to go home. I just want to be 6 years old. I want to go to preschook again and do painting.
I don't want to work from 5pm-5am and walking Brisbane streets at night all alone going from one cleaning place to another just for one client to write passive aggressive comments in the Communication booklet and my boss to start telling other co-workers that I'm having meltdowns and I'm high maintenance.
I'm autistic and I just want to be treated like a toddler or a dog because that's kinder than what's happening now.
I just want a husband to look after me and protect me.
I want to just make cute little videos and not have to worry my pretty head about money.
I DONT WANT designer bags or clothes. I just want to have a house I'm allowed to decorate and make dresses or bake for church. And a husband who comes from work and pats my head and tells me I'm a good girl. At this rate I don't even care if he's fucking a receptionist on the side.
I get it how these are such white woman tears. But fuck I think every woman should have this dream off they WANT without any shame.
I know it's a "grow up this is reality, you're describing something that doesn't exist." WHY CANT IT EXIST. FUCK.
I don't blame feminism. Feminism is amazing and I love her.
I blame classism.
People can't survive on just single home incomes anymore and that's fucked up to me.
"but women had jobs too you're just describing the rich wom-"
Women with jobs were mostly young single women waiting to get married or women who never wanted to get married but needed a liveable income. YES some entire families worked to survive poverty back in the day, I wont disregard that, but FUCK
you would think being so advanced as we are considering we mass produce via machine etc, human life would be "easier" BUT IT ISNT.
And I'm TIRED. I really am. I've been depressed since the day I was born but because it's so normal to me I forget how depressed I am and then feel bad when I burn the fuck out.
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quodekash · 8 months
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IM GONNA HAVE A STROKE ITS TIME FOR EPISODE 4 OF DANGEROUS ROMANCE
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I think they should probably kiss right now. that would be nice please and thank you
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THE BACK TOUCH IM SCREAMING
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bro why he look so confused
is he having gay thoughts or smth and hes confused as to why it's soccer-ball-usb induced?
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I love this woman so much
my goddess
my queen
milf fr
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OML-
IM LITERALLY CRYING FROM RESTRAINING THE URGE TO LAUGH
I WOULDNT SAY THAT, KHUN
WE DONT KNOW THAT FOR SURE
like yeah, sailom can't rly control kang's study habits outside of their tutoring sessions, but I wouldn't say he can't control him like... at all, ever.
he has top vibes tbh
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HE AGREES WITH ME
"um, excuse me bitch (respectful), sailom controls me very well, I am a submissive QUEEN"
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"do you want to go on a date with me?" "will you be my boyfriend?" "can I kiss you?" all of the above?
I know it wont be any of the above but I can dream
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I JUST LOVE HIM SO MUCH
HE'S SO KIND ALL OF A SUDDEN???
he was fine with being the worst part of Sailom's life, and then suddenly discovered so many other things in his life that Sailom has to face every day, and the punishment he gets every month if he doesn't pay his debt, and Kang realises he's the least of Sailom's problems, and he suddenly wants to help him as much as he possibly can. previously, he was offering his money to Sailom but not as comfort or help, but because he recognised his privilege and power and used it to taunt Sailom and to remind him who is in charge. but then he saw two grown men assaulting him and nearly pressing a hot iron to his face, and Kang suddenly saw just how much power and privilege he has, in the sense that he can literally solve most of Sailom's problems (because they mostly boil down to money) without any change in his own status whatsoever
he went from wanting to be the worst part of Sailom's life, to wanting to fix the actual worst parts of his life, and I just love him so much can you blame me for loving him so much
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OKAY BUT THE FACT THAT THEY'RE BOTH IN SCHOOL UNIFORM IN THIS IS SO INTERESTING TO ME
like. are they just taking a detour on the way home from school? or did they run away?
ive got my fingers crossed for an episode (perhaps two?) where they've run away and it's all happy and fluffy and they're away from the pain and the drama and its just me and you and you and me and we can be happy while we're here, we don't have to worry what anyone else thinks about us because we're together. and its probably at a beach.
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HE GRABBED HIM BY THE ARM IM GONNA DIE THEY'RE SO REUBKJLF
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just give me a moment while I sob
NO BC HE'S HOLDING HIS HAND
LIKE-
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AAAAAA
THE HAND ON THE SHOULDER AND THE HAND ON THE HAND
I KNEW THIS FRIKIN VR SCENE WOULD KILL MY SOUL BUT LIKE IN A GOOD WAY
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why am I crying.
can someone please explain to me why this is making me cry.
its so domestic. help.
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YOU'RE LITERALLY SO IN LOVE WITH HIM????
THIS ENTIRE MONTAGE IS THE END OF ME HOLY HELL
THEYRE SO DOMESTIC. IM DYING.
KANG FALLING ASLEEP ON SAILOM'S SHOULDER??? SAILOM FIDGETING WITH THE PENCIL AND KANG LOOKING AT HIM AND THEN LOOKING AT EACH OTHER AND THEN JUST SMILING???? SAILOM PUTTING THE BLANKET OVER KANG WHEN HE FELL ASLEEP AT THE TABLE????
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THIS???????
IM GONNA CRY. AGAIN.
IM ALSO GONNA RUN OUT OF SCREENSHOTS FOR ONE TUMBLR POST BUT I DONT CARE, THEY MEAN TOO MUCH TO ME
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THATS IT.
IM DONE.
THAT'S THE END OF ME
I SWEAR I FEEL MYSELF RISING UP TO HEAVEN
wait now I think im going down, maybe im going to hell
I have no sense of direction, I got lost on the way to wherever I was going and now im back in my body but HOLY FRICK ITS VERY LIKELY THAT I WILL DIE AGAIN
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VUIERJSBDGOPUVJBEWSDOG
GOOD JOB
THATS SO FREAKING GOOD OMG
IM SO PROUD OF YOU HONEYYY
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oh look, a not-so-subtle ✨metaphor✨
I think it's about them studying? without wind, the windmills can't spin, and then can't produce energy. without Sailom, Kang wouldn't have the push he needs to study?
it's something like that
it also might not be about studying. it could be about kindness
if it weren't for Sailom's situation, Kang wouldn't have had the change of heart that caused him to be kinder (particularly towards Sailom but im also hoping that he's helping him develop deeper empathy for others who also aren't as fortunate as Kang)
idk its something like that
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he leaned closer and now I can't tell if he's genuinely asking the question, or if he's trying to flirt
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OKAY WITH THE MUSIC PLAYING I THINK IT'S PROBABLY BOTH
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IT'S FINALLY HAPPENED
HE FINALLY DID IT
THE TOP GOT FLUSTERED
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BRO THAT IS SUCH A SUGGESTIVE SMILE
HE KNEW WHAT HE WAS DOING, THE LITTLE RASCAL
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I think he should give him a good luck and goodbye kiss
I think they should kiss is what im saying
pLEASEKISS-
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WAIT I DIDNT THINK THEY WOULD ACTUALLY LISTEN????
I know they're not actually gonna kiss. I know he's just gonna like tell sailom about how his grandma wont let him tutor him if he fails his midterms BUT I DONT CARE, I FELT VICTORIOUS FOR A SECOND, AND THAT'S NOT A FEELING I GET OFTEN SO LET ME BASK IN THE GLORY FOR A MOMENT
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DUDE YOU'RE LITERALLY THE WIND TO HIS WINDMILL, OF COURSE YOU HAVE INFLUENCE
AND HAVE YOU SEEN HOW MUCH STUDYING KANG'S BEEN DOING WITH YOU?? YOU'VE HAD SUCH A POSITIVE IMPACT ON HIS LIFE ITS INSANE (and you should totally kiss about it)
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HE'S LITERALLY LYING AWAKE THINKING ABOUT HIM, IF THAT ISN'T THE GAYEST SHIT IDK WHAT IS
I mean maybe it's the exams hes thinking about. but he's mostly thinking about how, if he doesnt pass all his exams, he'll lose sailom, and he doesnt want that because a) sailom could get beat up to a pulp again, and b) he doesn't want to lose sailom as his tutor when tutoring is like the only time they get to see each other and hang out, and he's realised how much he likes sailom and that he desperately doesn't want to lose that friendship - or the potential for it to become something more
conclusion: gay.
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Y E S
YES YES YES YES YES
SIDE COUPLE MOMENT SIDE COUPLE MOMENT
THEY HATE EACH OTHER SO MUCH RN AND IT'S SO ENDEARING TO ME
THEY WANT TO RIP EACH OTHER LIMB FROM LIMB AND IT'S SO ROMANTIC
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juST KISS
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you can do it bby, you are incredible
I think he'd do a lot better if he had adhd meds
because he has adhd. it's canon I decided.
do you want some of my Vyvanse, kang?
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OH LOOK AT THAT, IM CRYING AGAIN
oh look at that, I ran out of screenshots
OH LOOK AT THAT, IVE BEEN WATCHING THIS FOR OVER AN HOUR AND IM ABOUT 15 MINUTES INTO THE EPISODE. FRICK.
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le-trash-prince · 6 months
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Only Friends (But It’s a Jazz Musical)
Here is the 100% self-indulgent project that I have been working on since the series started! This began when I realized I was adding a lot of jazz songs to my regular OF playlist that didn't flow with the vibe of the other songs, so I separated them and realized how much they really worked on their own. I narrowed this down to a selection of ~40 tracks to just 11 to make it album-sized.
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I think, despite the fact that these songs aren't modern at all, they fit the series really well. As musical theatre is wont to be, though, this would be very anachronistic—not tied to a particular place or point in time, and with a range of music genres utilized. It's the type of thing where producers would say "Who cares? It's Broadway!" while critics write scathing reviews on how musical theatre is the lowest form of art.
Mostly it's just meant for fun. 😊 Listen on YT
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Tracklist + Scene Breakdown
I’m Gonna Live Till I Die
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(YT / lyrics) The opening number. The scene at the bar where we meet the cast. I love the long opening vocal note to this song and can picture each of the four main friends standing under a solo spotlight as the music builds, until the beat drops and the curtain parts and the stage bursts into life. The instrumental break in the middle would be lengthened in order to give Mew a chance to introduce the cast to the audience.
Something’s Gotta Give
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(YT / lyrics) This is the scene of Top hitting on Mew during trivia night. The irresistible force (haha) meets an immovable object. The line "something's gotta give, something's gotta give, something's gotta give" would easily be a recurring leitmotif sung by the chorus ensemble in the background of some of TopMew's tense moments and arguments.
You Go to My Head
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(YT / lyrics) This is the SandRay theme of the show. Ray starts off singing this to Sand when they're at Ray's house that first time. The direct comparison to alcohol shows that Sand is Ray's new fixation. An instrumental variation of this would play during most of their scenes, with a refrain sung by Sand later in the show ("Still I say to myself, get ahold of yourself")
I Put a Spell on You
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(YT / lyrics) Nick sings this while Boston seduces Top—through dance of course. This number is about both Boston coercing Top ("I put a spell on you") and Nick’s possessiveness over Boston ("because you're mine").
Smoke Gets In Your Eyes
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(YT / lyrics) Mew sings this about Top's betrayal. This was about how blind he was at the beginning, and the song culminates in Mew setting Top's drawing on fire.
I’ll Be Glad When You’re Dead (You Rascal You)
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(YT / lyrics) Both of the pool fights are combined in this scene, Mew going after Boston and Ray going after Top. It’s a little physically comical with lots of people chasing each other back and forth across the stage, but Mew and Ray are absolutely out for blood.
If I Didn’t Care
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(YT / lyrics) Sand is singing this onstage at club YOLO while all the boys try to process their unresolved feelings for each other. Lots of longing glances and loaded looks across the room.
I Don't Want to Set the World on Fire
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(YT / lyrics) This is Boeing's "I'm too hot for you to blame me for the chaos I bring and I'm going to set Top's life on fire" song. I absolutely envision this as a casual tap dance number, and he does the entire thing with his hands in his pockets and a shit-eating grin on his face.
If That Ain't Love
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(YT / lyrics) This one is on Sand's shuffle playlist in Ep 12, but I thought it really fit for a Boston solo! And I wasn't gonna not include the only jazz vocal playlist in the series. This is Boston trying to convince Nick that he loves him, even though Boston has no experience with romantic love.
You Always Hurt the One You Love
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(YT / lyrics) All of the boys are singing this song. Hurt people hurt people. Top, Ray, and Boston are singing together on one side of the stage, with Mew, Sand, and Nick on the other, with all three pairs meeting in the middle and clasping hands at the end. (circa ep 10/11)
My Way
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(YT / lyrics) This is the closing number and a duet between Mew and Boston on their final meeting. For a musical theater adaptation, compared to the original series, there's going to be more of a bang than a whimper at the end of this friendship, with both of them standing proud about who they are, faults and all. People were hurt, crimes were committed, questions remained unanswered, but Only Friends did it in a way no one else has.
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I hope y'all can give this a listen because I really enjoyed working on it. Doing a more theme-specific playlist was new for me, since I usually just throw anything and everything into my playlists, so I'd definitely like to try something similar with another fandom in the future. I hope y’all enjoy 😊
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osatokun · 3 months
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(for charlie - sry i love malkavians so much lol) wound, midnight, monster, heartbreak
So do I! my fav clan for sure and I stopped blaming myself for picking occult heavily based characters that are often malkavians. Enjoying what I love hehe.
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wound: How does your OC handle being wounded? Are their wounds mostly physical? Mental? Emotional? What's the worst wound your OC has ever experienced?
Physical? Easy. Once he got sick, he experienced the unbearable pain that could not be stopped. It was a mental disease and it slowly degraded kindred to being mindless creatures that could only kill and destroy, absolutely destroying their personality. Luckily, a salubri healed him. But after that he stopped fearing any physical pain, for better or worse. During the game he got his hands broken, he got his both legs chopped out, he got his tongue removed, his eyes got burned down several times etc etc. He has 0 fear. He understood that this is not alright, this is scary and painful for people around him too, when Glinda got sad because he was in pain. She grounds him well. As for mental and emotional.. well, he killed himself because he couldn't bear the betrayal of his trust in his family. The thought that he's lonely and family not always loves each other as you imagine. Reality crushed him, he started to take drugs, drink, and then killed himself trying to escape. So he doesn't deal well with feelings. But it's been 200 years, he's very slowly healing. He will never be entirely healed tho and he accepts it.
midnight: What keeps your OC up at night? Do they have nightmares? Fears? Anxieties? What do they do in the small hours of the morning when they should be sleeping? I mean, he can't be up because of nightmares, he's a vampire after all.. but he have nightmares all the time. His past fears, his current fears, and glimpse of upcoming future haunts him. He dies over and over again. He loose his loved ones over and over again. He fears for his new found family the most. He's pretty predictable and simple I think? Understanding that he can't save everyone is also haunting him. Understanding how many people died because he let a demon escape. Because he lost hope to save someone and didn't even try. Because he wasn't brave enough. Because he wasn't quick enough and instead of saving, he enjoyed his new happy family life. Because he was weak and got too emotional. He has so many blood on his hands. He saved many, but so many died.it will always haunt him. And before Glinda, he feared to be completely alone. He locked himself from everyone because of fear being wounded, so no wonder he was alone. She showed him that he's not alone but now.. now he is afraid SHE will get wounded or killed.He believes in her, he wont bother her with his fear, but he knows the fear is here.She knows it too. monster: Is your OC monstrous in any way? Is there something that makes them monstrous? Are they aware of their own monstrosity? Do they accept it or reject it? He learned to accept himself as a whole. I'd say, he even love his Beast as a part oh himself. However he asked Glinda to kill him if he'll fully become a monster one day. She rejected saying she is no different. heartbreak: Have they ever had a relationship that ended badly? Experienced some other kind of heartbreak? What happened? ...many. His first ever gf, Caroline, was a vampire. He is very stupid when it comes to emotions, he was sure it's going to be forever and ofcorse she likes him just as he likes her. However she used him while he was useful and easily guided. gaslited and manipulated him for almost 15 years. His sires didn't point it out, they wanted him to learn everything the hard way. But even now, when he understands what happened and that it wasn't love at all, he is grateful for the years they've been together and has no hard feelings. (even tho he run away from her in the end and still kinda fears her a bit)
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Then he didn't want to meet with anyone and avoided romantical contacts with people for 10~ years. But Caroline opened something new in him, desire to be loved, to be wanted, to be with someone. And once he saved a man who didn't want to die by giving him his blood. The man mistaken new feelings with love and wanted to posses Charlie. He seduced this little stupid malk who desperately tried to run away from the need of being loved. However when Charlie understood that when he's around the blood bounds wont get weaker, he broke up with this man. But it didn't end here. This man, David, was no little fluffy bunny. He stalked Charlie, manipulated his exes ( Charlie started to meet people, but quickly break up with them) into starting a Charlie-hate club where they started to learn magic and trying to make his life a nightmare. And when people started to get hurt. Charlie had to kill David. He fooled him that all these years was just a test and he passed, now they going to be together forever. At this point David already understood that Charlie is a vampire, but he believed that all this painful need inside was the need for bites. He let Charlie bite him, and malkavian drank all of his ghoul's blood, while reading his thoughts in the process. David was a criminal, a cruel and manipulative person, but Charlie mourns him still. He visits his grave and take care of it. And also thinks he had to let David die in the first day they met in the clinic, when they were just a patient and a doctor.
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tanoraqui · 11 months
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I blame @shrikeseams for this spontaneous fic. tw: accidental drug use
“This stew is very delicious,” Nóm commented, licking his lips with a thoughtful smile. “Tell me, what mushrooms did you use?”
Alert to the hint of wariness in his melifluous voice, Balan lowered his own bowl and turned sharply to his youngest niece, the evening’s chef.
“Daran, what mushrooms did you use in the stew?”
“Only sun-caps!” the girl said, stung. “Plenty fresh. I picked them myself this morning.”
Balan relaxed.
“The gold-topped mushrooms with white stems,” he explained to their shining friend. “Entirely harmless.” Nóm’s Taliska was far better than Balan’s stumbling Elvish; instead of trying to translate it plainer, he pictured the mushroom as clearly as he could in his mind’s eye, for Nóm could often pluck such things from a man’s head.
“Ah!” Nóm said happily, one explanation or the other clearly sufficient. He bowed gracefully across the fire to Daran. “Your use of herbs is very delicious, my lady.”
Daran giggled, as young women (and young men, and older men and women) were wont to do when the focus of Nóm’s charm.
[keep reading on AO3]
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parkerflix · 11 months
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about miles' mini series: i wonder how 1610! miles will react when returning home and meeting his universe's reader and having to start "over" but this time he can safely be in love without having an ENTIRE UNIVERSE deleting itself (poor boy he deserves the world).
and 2nd i think 42! earth reader (when they realize there are two miles ps whats the plural for miles? ahahha) they'll have a soft spot for 1610 miles because he is a miles. and they already care for 42! miles. they wont like 42! miles being meant to 1610! miles
(how funny is this ask without knowing context hahah)
hello! thank you for the ask!
1610! Miles I think will have a very good reaction! To be honest I will say part 3 won’t focus as much on his ending they’ll be an open & closed ending? very ambiguous but also depending on if people want it to be expanded on i would love to explore it! I think starting over might be hard in a sense for him, he knows this person but he doesn’t know them (if that makes sense lol). Definitely something he will have to make adjustments with!
42!reader definitely will have a hard time with it… honestly though who can blame them, I would probably have a breakdown myself. I’m hoping (bc it’s still being planned out) that we’ll be able to see their insight and kinda their thoughts on it. I think also coming to terms that the changes they saw in Miles was actually 1610!Miles will be interesting as well and also another curve they’ll have to navigate!
The plurals for Miles’ in my brain in Milesse. like geese. but i just think i’m funny idk!
(this probably looks like i’m talking abt 1 person w how many miles’ haha!)
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iminthetunnels · 4 months
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i read smthn so interesting on someone’s blog but it would be weird for me to reblog it. so i saved it as a draft. but i wanna rant abt it. i’m going to be all over the place and probably not make sense because it applies to me, and much so like everything else, my interpretations and assumptions and experiences in the situation all together.
when a man prioritizes a friendship relationship over a romantic relationship, i get bad feelings. not only do i feel as tho i take biblical words to heart and it resonates deeply within me, but a relationship with two people &god is focused on just that. and everything else will flow as a result. okay. so i do litwrally mean to put ur relationship first before anything, in order to maintain a partnership. this could be in business, family matters, child raising etc etc. without a strong family bond, what else can follow? and of course this is entirely from my perspective and experiences.
i never in my life thought to find love again. i couldn’t bear another anxiety ridden, sexually intense relationship where i didn’t truly find myself really loved, only desired when the time is right. and it disgusted me. i found faults in pursuing relationships, because no one listened, only lusted, only desired what i can bring to the table. which in a sense is normal. that’s fine, it’s a human desire to want someone commendable. i get that. i never thought to trust someone who i could pour my heart in both anger, disgust, just regular conversation, as well as love and commitment. i thought “i will do my best with my son and show him i choose him above all” which i do. which goes right back to my first paragraph. i think a relationship rooted in god, faithfulness, commitment, will overall be my end goal. it came so organically that i have hope once more. i promise u never have to settle, u never have to worry, u never have to feel that anxiety again when ur truly motivated and loved. and looked after truly. i also feel that, as a woman, in a society and country that does not value my work or love as a person, it can get very daunting and negative. i DO find myself resonating with other women who feel trapped by a male serving society. that’s not to say i hate being a mother, or i hate being a wife. i hate devoting my life. it goes right back to what so any WOMEN AND MEN FEEL, resentment for a subpar society. i refuse to make enemies with the opposite sex and blame them. it’s life making enemies with another race and blaming them. it gets us nowhere as a whole and unity should be our end goal. instead of fighting the common man, we should be standing up to oligarchs LMAOOOO lemme stop because i’ll sound rly crazy when i explain this next part. but it’s not me, you, or the next. that’s y i do stand for all. wont dismiss that certain ppl benefit from a society. but in that sentence on its own, they benefit from an established society. not one person
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aita for not enabling my friends eating disorder?
tw for eating disorders and misuse of medications for weight loss ⬇️
so recently my friend K has been really irritable and snappy with me lately. it's probably because she hasn't been eating a lot and has been losing a lot of weight really fast. i'm not here to blame or belittle her for her ed as i have also had an anorexia problem in the past but she's being a huge bitch and has terminated our entire friendship over ozempic. fucking OZEMPIC
for some background we are both in high school and live with our parents and my mom is a type 2 diabetic who just started taking ozempic. because of this my mom started losing a lot of weight on account of the decrease in appetite and this really inspired K.
so one day she had the gall to ask me to STEAL MY MOMS OZEMPIC just so she could lose a few pounds. this completely threw me over the edge because it was hard enough actually getting my mom the ozempic because of PEOPLE LIKE HER who only want to use it for weight loss are buying it all up and making it harder for people who actually need it to get ahold of it.
she tried to convince me and even bribe me to get it for her. i obviously said no because my mom needs it to LIVE and it escalated into a huge argument. she even had the gall to bring up the fact that she helped me through my ed and that wasn't willing to help her through hers. which is two entirely different things?? I was just starving myself and therefore not hurting anyone but my self and not trying to bribe someone to get me their fucking diabetes medication that they need to live.
(i'm also like 99% sure that K didn't do any research as to what ozempic is bc she is someone whos terrified of needles and wont come near one you and need to inject ozempic into your body. and secondly there is no way in any universe in which I steal the pen for her and its not obvious that i took it since theres only one pen per box and is only enough for one month of injections. theres no way my mom wouldnt notice)
anyway we haven't spoken in weeks and I miss my best friend. I wish we could talk again but K was being a huge asshat and I need to know if this was worth losing our friendship over. so aita here?
What are these acronyms?
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