#but it’s also south park so… anything could happen i guess

[romancingromanoff]

Second Death

Andromache the Scythian x f!reader

I decided to create a series for Andromache (my beloved). Here’s part 1, part 2, and part 3

Summary: Your first mission does not go according to plan

TW: Violence, major character death, somewhat descriptive gore, getting shot in the face, head explosions (kinda), ANGST

Words: around 3,000

A/N: Aside from being very difficult for me to write, this is probably the darkest I've ever gotten in terms of physical violence. So, uh, Happy Halloween I guess?

The plan was based off Buenos Aires 1822 (not 1922 as you had incorrectly assumed at first) which was a reference you obviously didn’t understand but was being explained to you in the most hectic way possible.

“Wait, so Nicky was decapitated-”

“Half decapitated. I didn’t actually die!”

“But you were quite light-headed for the rest of the day, my dear.” Joe feigned concern, brushing the back of his hand across his partner’s forehead and smiling like a fool.

Your leader was having none of it.

“Can we be serious please?” Immediately, the entire group’s focus shifted back to the Scythian. She certainly wasn’t going to admit it but she was apprehensive with this being your first mission. For months, you’d been doing nothing but training and begging her to let you in on the action until she was finally forced to give in. The instinct to keep you safe gnawed at Andy while it became increasingly difficult to ignore how your desire to prove your worth would only continue to grow. She recognized the same frustrations in a much younger version of herself and remembered how reckless it drove her to be.

“I’d rather we didn’t repeat that portion this time, agreed?”

You all nodded.

They laid out all the details about the traffickers and the group of people you were meant to rescue. It was an estimated 25-40 women and older girls being smuggled through for undoubtedly unpleasant purposes Andy didn’t get too detailed with. She, Joe, and Nico planned to storm the ship when it completely docked and most of the crew was on land retrieving supplies and weapons. That would leave only a few guards standing between them and the captives, who were most likely being held somewhere below deck. Once they find them, you and Booker would bring in the truck to help get everyone out. It sounded simple enough, but the fact that it was meant to go off without a hitch somehow doubled the amount of pressure you were applying to yourself. They had all done this at least once before, so if things went south then it was all because of you.

A few hours passed and you sat next to Booker in the passenger seat of the truck parked a couple of meters away from the ship and near a loading dock. With the engine off it was starting to get increasingly cold, but you didn’t even mind the chill at that point. You needed to be as alert as possible for what was to come.

Booker clearly sensed your apprehension. “It’s okay to be nervous, we’re not going to let anything bad happen to you.” He kept his voice low and his eyes glued on the dock entrance while you tried to do the same. 

Your mind was wrapped up in much bigger concerns. “I’m not worried about that. What if something goes wrong because of me? If I get hurt then so be it, I just don’t want to endanger anyone else when their lives and freedom are at stake.”

“You’ll be fine. Trust your training and lean on your team if you need help. That’s what we’re here for.” He offered you an encouraging smile that you attempted to return the best you could, yet you also wished he wouldn’t look at you with so much sympathy all of the time. As much as you appreciated everything they had done for you, you longed to show the others that you were capable of carrying your own weight and didn’t need someone to hold your hand constantly.

The two of you settled into a silence that was occasionally filled with a comment or two about nothing in particular. It didn’t do much to settle your nerves. You watched as dozens of muscular men left in packs, each one armed with at least a pistol that Booker taught you how to spot. He translated some of the French he could hear them speaking, which was mostly crude, misogynistic banter that made your jaw clench up.

“Good to know that men are pigs in basically all cultures,” you murmured mostly to yourself and tried to get your jaw to relax. Surprisingly, it earned you a gratifying laugh from the Frenchman and you were relieved when he didn’t take your comment too personally. 

“For the most part, I don’t disagree.”

“How will Andy and the others know when all of them have left?” You changed the subject upon the realization that the rest of the guard was hidden somewhere no one would see them, not even you. It was still difficult to imagine they had a better scouting position than the near-direct view you did.

“Don’t worry, they’ll know,” Booker assured you in a slightly amused tone. Some secrets were still too complicated for you to know about yet, you supposed.

Almost a half hour later, three heads eventually peered up through the shadows and Andy, Joe, and Nico lifted themselves up onto the ship. Perfectly lit by hues of the full moon, they danced towards their destination, the sheer coordination and skill reminding you of just how experienced they were. With Andy leading the pack, they silently began making their way up the vessel as a single unit. No words or other body gestures needed to be shared when they occupied the same hive mind. The group only came to a stop when they reached a door and huddled around it, trying to listen for anyone that might be on the other side. When you assumed everything was clear, Andy swiftly kicked it open and entered with her gun aimed and ready. 

Not even a minute after all three filed in, the sound of a gunshot suddenly shook you. You immediately turned to Booker, whose face gave away the slightest look of concern at the noise. This must not have happened in Buenos Aires. No more gunshots followed, thank goodness, but there were sounds of a struggle going on below deck which had the two of you on high alert. You prayed that nobody else close by could hear the commotion.

Things began to steer away from the original plan when Joe emerged from below far before he should have, struggling to keep another figure under control as he held their arms in a twisted position behind their back while continuing to firmly push them forward. Even in the dark, you could just make out how young the kid appeared to be. He couldn’t have been older than 16 and you assumed his reason for being on the ship was because he had an older relative in the crew. You relaxed when you realized that meant how unlikely it was that he’d be trained in how to fight. Joe would definitely keep from harming him unless he absolutely had to. Stupidly, you also forgot about how reckless young boys can be.

Everything fell apart in a mere matter of seconds. As he appeared to calm down, Joe eased up on the grip he held the boy with and he it didn’t seem like he would move at first. But in an instant, the scraggly kid darted from his grasp and sprinted around a corner and out of your line of sight to the completely opposite side of the ship. Booker reached for the door handle as a precaution while the rest of his body remained seated. A bead of sweat rolled down your neck despite the chill in the air and the gradual understanding that Book might be preparing to leave you on your own stilled your body completely. All of the careful planning you had fought to carefully commit to memory melted into mush.

Your thoughts were interrupted by a high-pitched whistle that rang through the air and your eyes quickly followed a bright red light travel up into the sky before it burst into a large display of lights and smoke. Time seemed to slow down and your heart sped up. Of course, if there wasn’t going to be another pistol going off, it had to be a goddamn flare gun. Yelling, alarmed Frenchmen could then be heard scrambling towards the dock and Booker cursed under his breath.

“Stay here, I’ll go help the others!” Booker leaped out of the vehicle, throwing the keys which hit your petrified figure. Part of you wanted to speak up and stop him but you could only squeak out an indecipherable sound of concern seconds after he was gone. Looking back at the ship, you caught sight of Nico peeking his head out from the door they entered through. He exited with a determined look on his face and was followed by a line of women. You itched at your sweating palms when twenty women or so had piled out and there was still no sign of Andy. 

The men hurrying in from the opposite direction quickly diverted your attention. Squinting your eyes, you were able to spot a figure in the distance headed straight towards your vehicle. You nearly panicked but caught yourself, uncertain if you were dealing with the traffickers or possibly random dock workers that had been alarmed by the flare and merely wanted to check out the situation. Either way, you decided it was still too risky to start up the engine just yet. At least, you told yourself the others probably wouldn’t want you to give away your position.

That’s when you noticed a faint movement in your side mirror. A tuft of matted blonde curls belonging to a distressed woman’s face peeked over the top of one of the crates not to far behind you. She must’ve spotted something concerning, because her eyes went wider than a trapped mouse’s and she disappeared back down, ultimately causing the crates to shake. You ground your back teeth together and prayed it was only you who had seen her. But then right on cue, the blinding glow of a flashlight landed directly over the area where the woman was hiding. The man you had spotted only moments before, his flashlight lit up a devious grin on his face that urged you to hold in your breath. He even sounded like the devil when he spoke. It didn’t take a high level French skills to tell that he began goading the poor woman like it was some sadistic game to him. 

He approached the crates ever so slowly, savoring the anticipation which laid before whatever unspeakable plans he had for his victim. It then occurred to you that she was most likely paralyzed with the same fear that had struck you.

And yet, she was the one currently being hunted while you were poised to sit and watch it unfold. You, protected by both your position and inexplicable gift of immortality. None of it seemed remotely fair and your body began to stir at the simple thought.

“Under no circumstances should you be engaging in combat,” Andy had firmly laid down the law several times leading up to this day. You’d never wanted to disobey anything she said so passionately before and here it felt like you scarcely had no other option but to go against something she forbade. 

The adrenaline rushing through your veins threw your body into action before you could debate any further. Barely aware of the forces taking hold of you, you tumbled out of the door and landed directly behind the attacker who continued to stalk forward towards the woman’s hiding place. He slowly began to raise his gun, something with barrels much longer than your forearms, and it was like you didn’t have the time to properly assess whatever danger lie at the other end. You just didn’t want it pointing at her.

Without a hint of hesitation, you drove foot into the back of the man’s left knee and he immediately crumbled down to about a third of his height. You were ready for him with your knife once his face spun around and an overpowering sense of rage guided your arm to make a clean cut from just below his right eyebrow, across the bridge of his nose, and finally through the center of his left eye. 

Something solid and heavy smacked the front of your head and you could hear the woman behind you scream in horror before everything went black.

Horrific violence was nothing if not a sheer constant to Andy. She had both experienced and caused enough to fill the oceans with blood, yet nothing made her seethe with rage more than watching yours spill from your head like a geyser. A thousand lifetimes stained with death could not have prepared her for the sight of your limp body hitting the ground, to which there was no question as to whether or not you were dead. Even if you had been wearing some type of protective head gear, a shotgun firing within five inches of your face would have been fatal. 

She was usually a pro at keeping her emotions under control until the mission was completed and never steered away from the plan without first calculating the absolute best course of action. The other teammates she had and the terrified group of women she was meant to protect called upon her to uphold her position as the leader, a task she had shouldered over a million times before despite whatever her personal feelings demanded. Absolutely none of that mattered now. Getting to you, killing that bastard, and wrapping you up in your arms became the only course of action she was capable of taking. 

Her first priority was taking out the son of a bitch that dared to touch you before anyone else got hurt. She handed off the little girl she had been carrying to Nico before barreling over a crate and launching herself over the side of the ship, rolling smoothly to break her fall when she hit the the dock. 

Despite how fast she ran, she seemed to move at a cursedly slow pace. She was still too quick for the man, his blood leaking from the fresh gash you had tore across his face, to notice her. He didn’t even get a chance to run before the warrior drove her labrys straight into the already-open wound. Andy could only revel in the brief taste of satisfaction for a moment before her emotions began swarming once again, the anger she had held for that man was now aimed solely at herself.

“Booker, get her into the back!” She barked at the Frenchman to take care of the hostage still hiding while rushing over to where your body collapsed. Up close, the sight was even more gruesome as blood, flesh, and bone were splattered all across what used to be your face. It would have been generous to call what was left of everything above your neck a simple stump. She knew she needed to get you out of there fast but hated to leave behind any parts of your head that might have been salvageable. Even saving something like an ear or significant chunk of your skull could aid in speeding up the healing process. She knew it would be excruciatingly painful for you to grow back yourself. 

She desperately grabbed at fistful of what she hoped was your brain before scooping you up in her arms. It was the fact that you were so much lighter than usual which made her wince, though she couldn’t help but be somewhat relieved when it meant it allowed her to run faster on her feet. Cautious yet quick, Andy made a beeline for the passenger’s seat of the truck and cradled your body in her arms while you continued to bleed out. It wasn’t a sight she wanted any of the hostages to witness and it’s not like she was letting go of you anytime soon anyway. 

“Drive!” One word was all she needed to command whomever was at the steering wheel to get out of there as fast as possible. It didn’t even occur to her to look up and check to see who she was sitting next to, as she immediately began trying to pick up any movement in your chest or a sign of a pulse in your wrist, anything that indicated the resurrection process was in motion.

“Please, please, come back to me,” she pleaded as your warm blood began to pool across her lap.

“Give her a second.” She realized it was Booker currently driving. “It’s only her second time and will probably take longer than expected.”

The women they had freed were now crammed together once again, only this time being in the back of a dark loading truck as it sped through the dead of night was probably far more merciful than them being forced to witness the transformation you were currently undergoing. Andy, however, couldn’t tear a single string of her attention away from you throughout the entire process. 

Each noise you made followed by the eventual cries of her name from your lips, once your mouth and airways had completely reformed, tore at Andromache deeper and deeper, in ways that no physical pain she had ever endured could compare. She bit down on her tongue till it was bloody as you repetitively squeezed her hand throughout the entire process. The same ones you often used to delicately recreate precious moments on paper broke more than a few of her bones. But Andy barely noticed and didn’t have the capacity to care. All she was focused on was you.

For the first time in centuries, the Scythian invoked the words of an ancient prayer and resurrected a long dead language as she tried to soothe your pain. She stopped believing in a higher power a long time ago but couldn’t shake the truth that repeating those words made her feel anchored to something even larger than her life or her immortality. There wasn’t anything she wouldn’t try if it might possibly bring you a sense of comfort, which she actually prayed may happen. 

#andromache the scythian x reader #andy the scythian x reader #andromache of scythia #the old guard #one shot #andy the scythian #the old guard x reader #andy #andy x reader #andromache x reader #angst #Charlize Theron characters

[howdidiendupshippingthispoll]

Have you known that a ship exists, but you have never thought of it that much until one day you realize you ship it and you don't know how it happened? Or have you thought that a ship wouldn't work but then somehow were convinced otherwise? Or you didn't know about a ship and suddenly said ship is everywhere and you can't help but fall in love with it? Well, then this contest is for you!

Shipping is a very funny part of any media! There are ships and ships, some cannon you love or hate, some no-cannon that you wish they had ended up together... and ships you don't know how you ended up shipping.

Really, there are ships you don't know how you ended up shipping! One day you are chill, happy with your life, and the next you are obsessing with a ship you might not even have known that it existed. In fact, that has happened to me twice just this year, so I decided to create a contest for those ships!

Rules:

Please, be respectful to everyone. Don't be rude to someone just because you don't like the ship or be mean in the tags or reblogs. Let everyone enjoy what they enjoy.

Propaganda is allowed and encouraged as long as you follow the first rule!

You can submit any ship you want, however, because I am not very familiar with a lot of media, I will ask you to please refrain from submitting any ship that you think might cause controversy or if they come from a very controversial media (like Harry Potter or South Park). You will be helping me a lot if you do this!

There are three exceptions to the above rule is that you CAN'T submit an illegal ship, nothing that features an adult with an underage. These ships will be instantly banned.

Also, for this contest, I will not accept OC's as part of the ship.

And last but not least, nothing that features real people. Singers, actors, youtubers, streamers, NO-ONE of flesh and meat.

The ship doesn't have to be cannon, they might not even interact in cannon, who cares? As long as you don't know how you ended up shipping them, then you can submit it! You can even submit characters from different media!

You can submit as many ships as you want but don't submit the same ship twice. Number of entries will not have that much of an influence in deciding if a ship enters or not.

Instead, I added a question for you to tell how you realized you shipped this. It can be anything! You didn't know about the ship but one day you saw a cute fanart of them and OMG they are adorable together; you didn't think of them as a couple but someone convinced you that they are pretty cute together and know you are ready to sink with the ship; or you know that the ship isn't that good in the story they are from, but my god, how could you not ship them?

This is not mandatory, of course, but the funniest and most interesting stories will have a better chance of entering the tournament.

Most important rule... have fun!

Here is the submission link for anyone interested:

They will close on Sunday June 4 at ECT time/GMT-5. If there are too many submission I will close earlier.

Some blogs that have inspired me are @controversial-blorbo-bracket, @weirdass-shiptournament, @guess-that-ship, @found-family-tournament, @died-but-not-dead-tournament and many more! Thank you for bringing joy with your polls!

#tumblr polls #poll #tournament poll #tournament #not a poll #competition #contest #rules info #ship poll #how did I end up shipping this #shipping #ship #sorry if there are any mistakes in the rules #english is not my mother tongue #Have fun

[hoosurdaddy]

Chapter 8.

Pairing: post covid! Stan Marsh x post covid! Reader, post covid! Kenny McCormick x post covid! reader.

Triggers: 18+, cheating, smut,gaslighting, fighting.. Reader is married to Stan, bad grammar, short.. Rushing this so I'm finally finished a series

--

Since the secret was out, you hadn't heard from Stan for the past few days despite the fact you had called and texted him, begging for him to come home and how you were willing to make things rights. You hadn't really slept or talked to anyone since. You had texted Kyle to see if he found anything about Stan, from his vague replies you had suspected that he was staying with him. At least he was safe.

Heidi had texted you about the entire situation and she seemed to be the only non-judgmental person talking to you right now. South Park was a small place, rumours were easily spread. You couldn't remember much from when Stan left, but you knew your two week holiday was up and you had to return to work.

When you walked into the door of the building, you could already feel the judgmental whispers and stares, while doing your best to ignore them but you couldn't, not even Butter's glares at you each time he walked by. You couldn't even eat your lunch in peace without people looking at you. You had just sat at your desk all day, pretending to be doing something. Until a fax came through for Kenny, which you had to deliver, which would stir up more rumors'.

But you held your head high when you entered his office. And there he was. His face was still swollen, you couldn't imagine how it looked before with all the blood. His lip was cut, his nose and eye were black, along with a few bruises on his arm. "Hey." You whispered as you handed him the fax, which he muttered a thank you.

You stood there for a moment as Kenny got a few more sheets for you to take out to your desk. "Why."

Kenny knew that the two of you were hot gossip around South Park, especially after the incident that took place at iHop. Kenny could see your eyes were sad and tired. You were a mess, you looked even worst than he did.

Kenny just shrugged. "You said you felt guilty."

"I do, but that was up to me to tell Stan."

"You weren't the only person involved."

There was no denying that Kenny was hurt, physically and mentally. He was always in pain from watching Stan hug and kiss, especially on your wedding day when Stan slipped that ring on your pretty finger, Kenny knew he had fallen in deep. Kenny always wanted you. You made him so fucking happy, you made Kenny feel like human. Even the nights when you'd rearrange plans with Stan to be with him. Kenny craved you so badly, but after this week events; he wasn't sure what was going to happen to either of you.

"If this was you trying to get back at me for ending things than fine. I guess I deserve it, but Stan did not." Kenny could take a thousand beatings from Stan and be okay, but with you, talking about your 'mistake' made Kenny want to remove him eyes. "I'm sorry Ke-."

Kenny held his hands up to stop you. "No, I'm sorry." Kenny figured this would have you running into his arms for him to take you back, but if anything, it made him look disgusting. "I have to go, faxes, lunch.." He rambled, moving past his desk and pasted you, leaving you standing there.

--

Tired, you dragged yourself into the house. You saw your parents car along with Stan's outside your house, and you could only think the worst. All you wanted to do was throw yourself onto the couch and cry yourself to sleep (somewhat). It surprised you Stan was home, but also extremely happy and nervous about what you were walking into.

In the kitchen, your dad sat there with Stan, laughing and smiling as your mom cooked what looked like to be burgers. Stan loved your dad, he was a stable father figure to him when his wasn't available. Stan always loved the feeling of family, and being around your family had helped Stan in his sobriety, especially when you both decided you wanted children.

"Honey." Your mom greeted as she walked up to you and hugged you while your dad smiled at you. Stan sat there, stoned face, but your parents didn't seem to notice. "Stan invited us to dinner. We're so glad you're home." Your dad continued, patting Stan on the back.

"Yeah, today was.. mad." Your voice was dry.

"Yeah, Stan was filling me in on all that happened this week."

You internally panicked, wondering what your husband had just told your parents. You figured it was nothing serious, or else your parents wouldn't be happy. You looked at Stan, who shook his head, letting you know that you were safe and that he didn't say anything about your affair. Your parents stayed for dinner, your dad had to much fun doing the wash up with Stan. They were both laughing and joking, while your mom sat with you, discussing about Uncle Derek's latest adventure to Australia.

When your parents finally left, you went upstairs to your bedroom. You noticed what a mess the room was in with Stan's clothes everywhere. You figured he was moving his stuff out. You heard foot steps coming up the stairs, it was Stan.

"What Stan? I'm a lying slut, you hate me."

"I don't hate you." Stan announced, leaning against the door. "Trust me, I want too. Some of us take our vows more serious than others." He continued, walking over to were you were sitting on the bed as he reached over to hold your hand. "I had called your parents to come get your stuff, and tell them about what had happened, but when they got here and I began talking to them.. You know your dad doesn't think I'm a total loser, he told me he was proud of my sobriety even while running a whiskey company." Stan let out a chuckle. His own dad never told him he was proud of him, let alone try help him get sober when he needed to be most. But he done it, and he would do it again.

"You were never a loser." You muttered, squeezing Stan's hand as you listened to him ramble. You had to becareful with your words. "Listen, I get it when we divorce you can still be friends with my dad."

"Divorce?" Stan shook his head. He wasn't going to throw away his entire marriage over a mistake that you made. "No way. Y/N I am not throwing away my whole fucking marriage over McCormick, okay? I don't know how but you're going to fix it."

You inhaled as you stared at him. You hadn't even considered fixing your marriage since that didn't seem like what Stan wanted, but he did. He was willing to give you a second chance. Stan wrapped his arms around you as you cried into his chest. The past few days had been lonely without him.

"Stop crying." Stan whispered as he hugged you. "You're going to make things right."

"How? How can I make any of this better?"

Stan sighed as he pulled away from you. "I wanted to tell you when things were right.. But there was a buy out on an old whisky company in Wyoming, and my company bought it.. It would be great to expand the market and for growth of the company, which means when the company is starting I will have to be in Wyoming a lot, which is about a seven hour drive." Stan started. "I want you to quit your job and move to Wyoming with me to start a new life without Kenny."

"Stan, I-"

"I am not giving up on this marriage because of Kenny. No way." Stan gripped your hands tightly. "You can fix this by leaving your job, and coming to Wyoming with me. We can have a fresh start, where no one knows who we are, or what has happened..So are you going too?"

You shrugged. "I don't know."

"You don't know?" Stan didn't think he was being unreasonable by asking so much. After all, you were the one who ruined your marriage when you decided to sleep with his best friend. He could of divorced you and went to a strip club, like Kyle had suggested. But he didn't. He wanted you. He wasn't going to lose you to Kenny. You had to work your ass off to make this right, and until Stan could forgive you; he would be the one in charge. "I can tell you my decision."

"Can I think about it? I'd be leaving my parents, our friends."

"I don't think you'd wanna hear what our so called friends are saying about you right now." Stan spat at you, making your head drop. He was right.

You nodded. Stan stood up as he planted a kiss onto your forehead. "I'll give you till Tuesday to think about it, 4:30. You better have a decision." You nodded again, feeling the tears welling back up in your eyes but this time, Stan wiped your eyes and gave you a kind smile (which you didn't deserve). "I'm going to stay at Kyle's until then. I'll see you soon with a decision."

You nodded again. Stan had left. You checked the day on the calendar, seeing that it was Saturday. You had a whole two days to make a decision that will affect the rest of your life, but regardless the consequence of your actions, and now you were paying for it.

#post covid!stan marsh x reader #post covid!south park #post covid!Stan Marsh #Post covid!Kenny McCormick #Post Covid!Kenny McCormick x reader #post covid!kenny mccormick smut #stan marsh #stan marsh x reader #kenny mccormick #kenny mccormick x reader #south park x reader #traitor series

[supposed2befern]

Hello! I haven’t posted anything for…a while now lmao but I HAVE been drawing. So, allow me to dump all my art in this post so I can disappear off the face of the Earth again because composing a good post is too much effort for my pathetic brain to handle /hj

I’ll try to put them in order of when they were made, but I’ll also group them into categories. The date as well as my signature can be found on all of the drawings (if you care lol)

This is a drawing I did for a friend of mine. It’s his original character, Mad Snake. Normally, I don’t like taking requests, but I genuinely enjoyed drawing this guy, so I didn’t mind it. He was a step out of my comfort zone, and I liked how he turned out!

Now, the Jaiden pieces! The first one was my idea that Jaiden started performing for Las Casualonas (but, like, as a singer or stage personality. She never actually did anything spicy). I also thought she and Melissa could have a really funny dynamic. Like some sort of rivalry for the audience’s attention/love.

The second picture, as it obviously states, is what I headcannon Jaiden looks like working for the federation. I had fun with her scythe (and if you pay close attention, you can see a little something in the reflection:])

And the third one is of Jaiden stretching w/ her wings. It’s also the most recent of this entire batch. Basically, I finally came up with a way that I liked to draw wings and had a sketch in my sketchbook of that pose, so I drew Jaiden. Her shirt intentionally comes down low in the back to make space for the wings, and her hands are out of frame because I didn’t want to draw them. Also, that one only took me about 2 and a half hours, where most of the other took from 6-8 hours, so…lol

The next pieces are an original work from 8th grade an the redraw two years later. It was an assignment that we had to read a novel and then make a trailer for it. I asked to make a drawing instead, and thus, this creation was born.

I changed a little bit, like putting two of the characters in the trees instead of a fading color behind them. Overall, they both took me three days and I’m really happy about how the redraw turned out.

This is Imp. Yes, he looks like SomethingElseYT, but I don’t care. I love him, and I was already attatched when I realized. I made a whole spread in my sketchbook for him (I ran out of images, so I didn’t include it here. Maybe another day) Also he serves no purpose other than being something I can doodle on random things and places. He doesn’t even have hands

This next one is a self-portrait in an outfit that I really liked! The original had my full name, but I blurred it for the sake of not wanting my full name on the internet (I’ve probably screwed up somewhere, but at least I’m trying :’)

And this last one is meant to be part of a collection, but I only made for Kenny. I want to draw all of the main four in South Park as teens, but I haven’t been able to think of poses and stuff for the others. It willl happen one day, but for now have this I guess

So, yeah. That was all the art that I wanted to share but haven’t had the motivation to actually put together posts for all of them. Hope you enjoyed my little display lmao

You probably won’t see for the next, like, couple of months because I’m really bad at posting. So, take this as my going away gift :D

#fanart #jaiden animations #qsmp #qsmp jaiden #roier #kenny mccormick #digital art #South Park #art dump #literally #artwork #artists on tumblr #original art #I can’t think of anymore tags #:)

[1moreoffkeyanthem]

hi, you can probably guess who i am bc ik you read my fanfics but as someone who is notoriously bad at posting fanfictions regularly how do you do it?? whats ur secret?? since you’ve had ur a03 for less than a year lol

Man I wracked my brain trying to figure out who you could be but I have a singular brain cell lmao.

And honestly? The only “secret” I have is that I get extremely fixated on things, like to the point where they don’t leave my mind, and that happened with South Park. I’ve always had a really active imagination too which means NO shortage of ideas lmao. As for the actual writing of the fics, I usually draft them mentally first, like while I’m at work or trying (failing) to fall asleep so they come together pretty quickly.

I also post a lot because I primarily operate in oneshots, which means the burnout risk isn’t as high as with multichapter stories. And most of the multichaps I do only don’t get abandoned because they CONSUME my mind and I can’t leave them unfinished.

ALSO I absolutely thrive on validation so every comment or kudos I get motivates me to keep writing what I love!

The entire reason I started writing SP fanfiction was because while I’ll generally read pretty much anything, I wanted to write EXACTLY what I wanted to read, like the specific ships and tags and tropes. Specifically fluffy injury hurt/comfort lmao. There wasn’t enough out there and I decided that’s something I was gonna change.

TLDR: write what makes you happy, and don’t force creativity. Have fun with it!

#asks #thank u for this #long story short I’m just insane #and have no life and Tweek level sleep habits #south park #ao3 shit #fanfiction

[illfoandillfie]

Underground

Pairing: Ben Hardy x Reader

Words: 769

Warnings: Ben is poor tired baby, meet cute.

A/N: Wrote this in a frenzy by hand when the internet was out. I think someone requested a Ben meet cute on a train one of the last times I took prompts and I guess I was thinking about it again and wrote this lmao. Also, please do not tell me if the train stations I chose make so sense I live in Australia, I’ve never been to the UK, I had to google a London Underground map and hope for the best.

You had no idea what to do. As far as you were aware there wasn’t really a guide for how to handle someone using you as a pillow in public. And a stranger at that. You’d done the normal thing when he’d approached the seat beside you. Avoided eye contact, focused entirely on your phone. Well, maybe not entirely. You had snuck a small glance at him, subtly of course. But you were single! No one could blame you for checking out a random guy on the train. You knew people who’d met on public transport and ended up married, as unlikely as it sounded. What if he ended up regularly getting the same train? Maybe it could turn into a thing like it did in movies. And he had been very handsome from the quick glimpse you got, if a little tired looking. You wouldn’t have minded any sort of a thing happening with him. Except then the handsome stranger had nodded off, right on your shoulder. What the fuck were you meant to do with that?

After a few panicked beats where you hoped he’d catch himself and sit up and you could pretend it had never happened, you glanced around for some help but your fellow passengers were doing an admiringly good job at pretending not to be looking. They were all probably just relieved it wasn’t happening to them. You tried giving the poor man a nudge, shifting your shoulder under his weight, anything to dislodge him if not wake him. But, either he was too asleep or you weren’t forceful enough because it did nothing. Surreptitiously poking his thigh didn’t work, nor did you have any success when you tried clearing your throat. But that was about all you could think to do without making a scene and making a scene was the last thing you wanted. Truth be told, you also felt a little bad for him. He must have been quite exhausted to fall asleep like that. So, partly out of kindness and partly out of sheer awkwardness, you resigned yourself to your fate and let him sleep, just hoping he’d wake before the train got to your stop. You didn’t really know what you’d do if he didn’t.  

He was out for longer than you’d have liked but thankfully not so long you had to face the quandy of getting off the train. He woke with a start at a particularly forceful jolt of the train and for a moment you both just blinked at each other.

“Sorry,” he finally said, still seeming a little groggy. As his wits came back to him you could see the realisation of where he was and what had happened dawn on him. “Oh fuck, I’m so sorry.”

“No, it’s alright,” you said blushing. It was an awkward conversation anyway, your instincts telling you to pretend it had never happened. And now you could properly see him you were seeing just how pretty he was.  

“I swear I don’t make a habit of falling asleep on strangers.” He made an attempt at a laugh and you tried to reciprocate but everything was so bizarre and awkward.  

“Uh, long day then?” You didn’t know how to get out of the situation without a polite conversation.  

“Yeah, just a bit. Wait.” he peered around, “Where are we?”

“Ummm, I think we just left Park Royal.”  

“Fuck,” he sighed.”

“Where were you meant to get off?”

“South Kensington.”

You cringed when you realised how far he’d gone past his stop.

“Oh well,” he was blushing too by then and rubbed the back of his neck, “guess I’ll just have to get off next and head back.”

He had a solution. He didn’t need any help from you. And yet you couldn’t stop yourself from saying, “I’m getting off at the next stop. I was going to grab some tea on my way home. You could join me if you wanted. I mean, unless you have to get back to Kensington urgently.”

He considered you for a moment but as the conductor announced the next station he seemed to make up his mind, “That sounds great actually. I’m honestly starving.”

You tried to hide your laugh as you stood up, making your way to the door, able to feel him following you.

Both of you joined the throng leaving the carriage, stepping out onto the platform.  

“I’m Y/N by the way.” you said as you walked along the platform, still a little in disbelief about your commute.  

“Ben,” he said, holding out his hand and flashing you a smile.  

#my writing #my blurbs #ben hardy x reader #ben hardy imagine #q

[houseofbrat]

I'm still on DivorceWatchMarch2023, and last I heard they were living separately and barely seeing each other, but we will have to see what happens. If not this month, then I believe it will be by May, but this is based solely on my prediction when they married that it wouldn't last five years.

I've not been really keeping up with the Markle goss for a while, so sorry to all who look forward to tea time. I haven't gotten any updates from my brother lately either for that matter other than we will be seeing more of Harry and Meghan on South Park at some point. I think they will be repeat secondary plot line characters next time though, like Satan and Jesus are. I was told that the South Park team was amused at how butthurt Harry and Meghan got.  Other than that, I've got nothing new.  I think something big is about to come out that will destroy them from a PR perspective, but I got that from Lady C.

I think Meghan threw down the title card for the children to try to get ahead of whatever this big thing is. Apparently they've known since the funeral that the children were Prince and Princess, but deferred on the announcement for some reason. Probably to create just this precise situation where everyone loses their shit. I personally don't think it changes anything or that Charles was wrong to give them the titles.  I DO think Charles should have just announced it back then and cut off the current Meghan shitstorm at the pass. That was his weakness, just not coming out with it from the beginning when he announced the PPoW. Maybe he didn't want any outrage to overshadow his mother's death, because really Harry and Meghan's kids' titles shouldn't even be given the opportunity to compete with mourning the late Queen.  There have been six other months though that he could have announced this and he should have. Now we've got a huge tempest brewing in a teapot, but again, I think this stunt was Meghan trying to get ahead of something. I mean, Christening Lilibet has nothing to do with her having the title of Princess, but Meghan threw that in for some reason. I think the Christening was solely to get Tyler Perry's alliance with her, whether real or imagined, cemented as Lili's godfather.  Again, something big is coming and she may be trying to tie him to her in case this scares him away.

Anyway, I'll start trying to keep ahead of the Todger Gossip again. I took a break from them for the Murdaugh trial. Meghan was really wearing me down, and I needed something uplifting /s, but I guess I need to get back to it. I will get to the bottom of this Tyler Perry alliance if it's the last thing I do. I've got a theory, but I want to have more than that because I'm certain that he had them removed from his house because The Wife was abusing the staff and refusing to accommodate others that Tyler invited to stay there for a few weeks.  He is also a very kind man by all accounts, so... other than his money, he's not really Meghan's type

I think this is really a non-issue. I remember now that Lady C said ages ago that they were already Prince and Princess and that the website and Prince Charles had nothing to do with it.

If Charles were going to do away with their titles, he would have had to issue new Letters Patent, which we know he has not done, so really this is nothing new and we are playing into Meghan's manipulative hands by even acknowledging this.

I think the titles are a red herring and we need to stop focusing on them and start focusing on why she has chosen NOW.  She orchestrated three things to try to rile people up over the course of 24 hours:

The Christening- that Meghan had acted like the Christening is what MADE Lilibet a Princess. It didn't. She doesn't have to be christened to be a Princess. Why a Christening for a 2-year old AND a title announcement at the same time?  I've got a theory, and I think the Christening is all about Tyler Perry and cementing him to her because she knows something is coming that could make him run away.

The titles. We now know the titles have been in place since the death of the Queen. She's been holding this card for six months, has had all of is playing will-they, won't-they about the titles for months and has chosen to play it now. Why? Has the National Weather Service updated the  DivorceWatch to a DivorceWarning? Is she trying to drum up goodwill by announcing her kids have titles that she has said she didn't care about? If so, that misfired, but Meghan always does misfire when it comes to generating goodwill, so...

The What's-her-name race-baiter interview. Why dredge that up right now? It's definitely not a coincidence and it's definitely at Meghan's command that this woman stirs the shit pot because the last time we heard from her it was around another big Meghan trifecta to deflect from Earthshot. Meghan miscalculates here because the woman is saying the Royal Family is racist at the same time as Meghan is announcing her children are fully titled members of that family, but we know Meghan always fails at every scheme to generate goodwill for herself, but she succeeds at getting everybody all worked up. Still she's been silent for months. Why now?

Regardless we are all doing what she wants us to do by getting outraged about this.  Whatever her reason for creeping out of her swamp to piss everybody off, the children's titles aren't it.  I'm curious about what actually IS it. Regardless, I'm eager to hear Lady C's take today.

Getty falling through may totally screw up the timing, but she is done with Harry and it is merely a matter of time before she publicly jumps ship. Harry is broke and she blames him for their being a laughingstock. Meghan really thought she had Getty locked down, but Getty's family has now reportedly successfully intervened, and I don't know what effect, if any, that will have on the future of the Todgers.

At one point, I heard Harry was the one who was leaving. At the Queen's funeral he was pulled back into reality enough to be done with her, but he is too crazy and drug-addled at this point to make a decision or act one way or another. However, whether or not it is publicly or legally acknowledged, they are separated. They don't live together. They are only seen together for staged publicity. She is, however, still in control.

#reddit #rumors...conjecture #2023 Sussex Divorce #that dumb prince's stupid wife #celebrities #pr games #titles 'n shit #Harry's Wife's Public Reputation Management #duchess of I NEED PRESS #duchess of I WILL NOT BE IGNORED BRF!!!

[floflipo]

k2 random oneshot

warnings: minor swearing, not proofread, just eh in general, gay kyle broflovski, also gay kenny mccormick

“Huh, you’re usually not up at this time.”

“... I guess.”

Two voices- one cheerful, one groggy- could be heard at the late time of 2:37 AM. Kyle sighs as he reaches across his desk and tries to grab a pen, but drops it onto his wooden floor. There were towers of textbooks, notebooks, and random pencils surrounding a singular sheet of paper. The piece of paper, devoid of Kyle’s chicken-scratch handwriting, sat sadly on his desk.

“Did something happen? You okay?” Kenny softly speaks to the speaker after a few moments of silence.

“No, not really. I’m fine. Just, you know,” Kyle inhales quickly. “Graduation is soon.” Kyle wishes that time didn’t move on so quickly. He missed the times in elementary school, where studies and reputation weren’t a huge worry.

“Haha, it’s weird to think that we’re gonna go to college soon. I mean, it feels like we haven’t changed at all since then,” Kenny laughs. Kyle can imagine it. How Kenny’s freckled cheeks slightly go up, scrunching up his face. He looked pretty when he smiled. He looked pretty with any facial expression, but especially his smile.

“Really? I feel like most of us have changed. For the better, and the worse. I kinda wish we didn’t,” Kyle scratches his hair with the back of his pen.

Kenny thinks for a bit. “Well, Cartman’s still an asshole, Stan still has problems with Wendy, Butters is still… Butters I guess. You’re still you, and I’m still me,” He says finally. 

“Change can be a good thing too, but it’s still lonely watching everyone around you grow,” Kenny also adds.

Kyle massages his temple and groans. “I don’t want to deal with any of this shit. University, jobs, moving, and everything. I wish our parents still did everything for us.”

“... Right, you’re moving to the city. It’s gonna get more lonely around here for sure, haha,” Kenny painfully laughs.

“I feel like nothing is gonna work out, Kenny. No matter how hard I try,” Kyle suddenly breaks down, almost crying.

“None of us know for sure if something is gonna work out. But none of us know for sure if something isn’t going to,” Kenny says softly. Gosh, it almost feels like Kenny’s sitting right here next to him, rubbing his back like they used to do as kids. 

Kyle almost regrets that he used his last years at South Park for studying. Maybe he should’ve hung out with his friends more.

Kyle doesn’t say anything for a while. Probably because he was crying. Kyle never liked talking when he was crying. All the words that he meant to say end up in a jumbled-up string of sniffs, hiccups, and sobs.

“Hey, I know you’re crying. I’m not gonna push you to talk or anything,” Kenny says slowly, soothing him. “But if you don’t know how something’s gonna end, isn’t it just better to believe it?”

Kyle sends Kenny a text instead. How do you know it’s not going to betray me? He retypes it a few times, due to his fingers shaking.

“... Do you not believe yourself?” Kenny asks.

Not really.

“Mm, then do you believe me?”

Duh, you’re my best friend. Kyle scoffs at the words “best friend”.

“Then believe in me who believes in you, alright?” Kenny’s voice could only be described best as light. It was almost too bright for Kyle to look at directly.

After a long pause, a mumbled “Okay, thanks Kenny,” could be heard, and after that, the short call of three minutes and twenty-seven seconds had ended.

the quote believe in me who believes in you is from an anime called tengen toppa gurren lagann, but the first time i heard it was in monika after story.

the thing about kenny’s voice being light is kinda a reference to killua’s thoughts about gon in chimera ant arc. (when gon insisted that kite was okay)

first time writing a oneshot/fanfic, idrc if it's bad its almost 1 am im going to sleep this isn't proofread btw

#sp k2 #fanfic #oneshot #south park #kenny mccormick #kyle broflovski

[aceditwrites]

The Master List (hi)

Master List:

Hi, i’m ace. I got really bored and i need an excuse to procrastinate on my personal writing projects so i decided to start an account dedicated to just writing. So like, you can request almost anything (limits below) like if you want like a platonic fic just ask! If you want the reader to be the kid or sibling of the character, i’ll do it! You can be as specific or as vague as you want, eventually i’ll get some prompts for help but for now, you gotta wing it. Also I’ll write for like any fandom even if i dont know it, i’ll try my hardest but i’d prefer if you stuck to the list below. Anyways yeah.  (also pfp is nyurei on picrew)

So basic rules, 

If youre an nsfw account dni, also i will not write smut regardless of age given i’m a minor

No incest 

I’m currently only doing x readers, that might change in the future but for now no ocs or ships

I’d prefer if you didn’t request x reader with an actual person, (ex. Instead of asking for a Maya Hawke x reader, ask for a Robin Buckley x reader)

If you know a character’s sexuality and you dont fit, dont ask (ex. Nico is gay, I will not write Nico x fem! reader)

Please specify pronouns when requesting 

Please keep in mind i’m not a professional writer 

Please use common sense and dont do something that makes me have to update the rules

Anyways, so fandoms i’ll write for

It 2017/2019: Richie Tozier, Eddie Kaspbrak, Stanley Uris, Bill Denbrough, Beverly Marsh, Ben Hanscom, Mike Hanlon (specify if you want 2017 or 2019)

Percy Jackson: Percy Jackson, Annabeth Chase, Grover Underwood, Piper McLean, Jason Grace, Leo Valdez, Hazel Levesque, Frank Zhang, Connor Stoll, Travis Stoll, Nico Di Angelo, Will Solace

Harry Potter: Harry Potter, Ron Weasley, Hermione Granger, Draco Malfoy, Cedric Diggory, Ginny Weasley, Luna Lovegood, Fred Wealey, George Weasley, Tom Riddle

Supernatural: Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester, Castiel, Gabriel, Lucifer, Kevin Tran, Crowley, Charlie Bradbury, Rowena (does girly have a last name 💀), Jack Kline (platonic only)

South park (platonic only for everyone, they’re children): Kyle Broflovski, Stan Marsh, Eric Cartman, Kenny McCormick, Butters Scotch, Tolkien Black (or is it Token? I swear its always spelled different), Timmy, Craig Tucker, Tweek Tweak, Jimmy Valmer, Wendy Testaburger 

Jurassic World Camp Cretaceous: Darius Bowman (i’d prefer if we kept it platonic with him but romance is ok i guess), Kenji Kon, Brooklyn, Yasmina Fadoula, Sammy Guiterrez, Ben Pincus, 

Marvel: Tony Stark (platonic only, so sorry) Steve Rodger, Bucky Barnes, Natasha Romanoff, Wanda Maximoff, Peter Peter, Ned Leeds, M.J, Harley Keener, Thor Odinson, Loki Odinson, Shuri, T'Challa, Okoye

The Owl House: Luz Noceda, Willow Park, Amity Blight, Edric Blight, Emira Blight, Gus Porter, Eda Clawthorne, Lilith Clawthorn, Hooty (platonic preferred, but if you freaky like that go ahead and ask for romance, see what happens), Raine Whispers

The Umbrella Academy: Luther, Diego, Alison, Klaus, Five (would he date a kid or an adult cause-), Ben (he can be alive or yall could be ghosts), Vanya 

Idk how any of this works but uh have fun

#Aced it #fanfic #x reader #platonic #romantic #it 2017 #it 2019 #percy jackson #heroes of olympus #harry potter #supernatural #spn #south park #jurassic world camp cretaceous #jwcc #marvel #avengers #toh #the owl house #tua #the umbrella academy #writing #requests open

[blazehedgehog]

Thoughts on South Park?

It's weird to think that South Park has been going for so long that I was in Elementary School (in Colorado!) when it premiered. I remember standing out in the snow waiting for the teacher to open the class room in 4th grade, complaining about how my nose was so cold it had gone numb, in between kids quoting Cartman and screaming "THEY KILLED KENNY!!"

That was probably something like 25 years ago. My Mom told me I was too young to watch it at the time, and I was. But you can't help it when the kids with looser parents are constantly telling you about it on the playground.

South Park has had lots of ups and downs over that time period. I never really got in to the show. Every time I tried, its humor was too abrasive and edgy to be anything that really hooked me over a long-term period. As it turns out, "Everything sucks and we hate everybody equally" isn't actually very funny, at least not to me.

And it's created a particular breed of Joker who embraces the show's ideals. People can say that Eric Cartman was always supposed to be the ultimate angry loser, but he's also been the one on the most merchandise and is generally the one under the spotlight the most often. There are a lot of people out there who think he's actually supposed to be cool and is just "telling it like it is," even when the show intentionally makes him toxic, or racist, or a bigot. It's seen as a form of empowerment. That's not great!

So much of that show has made so many people on this earth miserable. It has spearheaded campaigns of real hatred in this nation and gets to hide behind the excuse of cynical comedy when clearly some people see it less as a joke and more as a rallying cry for their destructive views. South Park didn't invent hate speech, but it definitely created a path to push for hate speech acceptance.

Nowadays, whenever I happen to see a clip of South Park, its brand of cynicism seems so sad. The show probably costs pennies to make -- there's a whole documentary about how they manage to turn an episode around in under a week, and there have even been instances where they have done episodes in just a day or two. Which is probably the reason its still on the air. There's a group of people who have been watching this show every week for most of their adult lives and its just a habit for them, and the costs are low enough that they'll keep making it forever.

But, like, there was a thing trending on twitter last week, because I guess there was an episode where Cartman had to use the restroom at school, but something was wrong with the boys room, so he threw on a cute bow and claimed to be transgender so he could use the girls bathroom.

And it felt so lame and boilerplate. It reminds me of that Eric Andre monologue where he makes fun of edgy 90's comedy. Every time I see earnestly edgy commentary like that I think about the smash zoom on Eric's face where he rips the parental advisory sticker off his mouth and goes "OH I'M SAYIN' IT." It makes me laugh to think there are people for whom this is their actual personality.

I suppose the real truth is I grew up in the world South Park said exists and it did not turn me in to a bitter, cynical monster who only wants to laugh at how much the world is burning.

#questions #Anonymous #south park #goin down to south west gonna go my bus #cartman

[awhitehead17]

Batfam Alphabet: X - Xylophone 

Summary: Tim is almost driven insane when a new case comes in and the killer’s signature happens to be a musical tune which he can't figure out.

Enjoy! :D 

“What’s the connection between the victims?”

“The police and the detectives haven’t been able to connect anything between them. That’s why Gordon’s brought the case to us, to see if we could spot anything they didn’t.”

Looking up from the paper he was examining, Tim frowns and turns to Bruce at the other end of the table. “How long have they had this case now?”

Bruce sighs and runs a hand over his face as he also examines papers in front of him. There are papers and files sprawled out all over the table, every single piece linking back to the case they’ve been asked to take on by Commissioner Gordon.

“The first victim was killed five weeks ago. Since then four more have died and the police, as reluctant as they are to admit it, are struggling to catch the killer.”

“Is that one a week?” Tim asks, taking a guess at the situation. This is the first he’s heard about these deaths, unfortunately it isn’t uncommon to hear about a death happening but for so many in little time it’s a wonder why he hasn’t heard about it yet.

Bruce hums in confirmation. Leaning back in his chair Tim lets out a breath and picks up another piece of paper, he analyses the details trying to wrap his head around the information he’s reading.

Bruce had not long come back from a meeting with Commissioner Gordon and as soon as he got into the cave he immediately went to work looking into the case and what the police have gathered on it, already being in the cave Tim got privy to the case and soon enough he and Bruce were engaged in a conversation about it. It surprised Tim that Bruce didn’t stop him from getting involved but it seemed like his adoptive father was open to the extra pair of eyes on the case.

“So five deaths and no links between the victims. Nothing at all?” It seems odd. Usually in these cases there’s a pattern after the third victim (if it gets that far) but for there to be nothing Tim isn’t buying it. There’s usually something.

Bruce shrugs in an almost helpless manner. “According to Gordon, all they’ve been able to work out is that the victims are children of the socialite however there are no targets to a certain gender or to a certain age. The families are from different ethnicities, they’re not all Gothamites, for example one victim was South African. The victims’ families aren’t part of any shady business, none have ever been involved in affairs, or owed money. The victims all tended different schools and ran in different social circles. The police can’t find a clear MO.”

“So the victims were random pickings?” God, Tim feels sick just saying the sentence and thinking about it, what the fuck is wrong with people nowadays.

“That’s a possibility,” Bruce ponders, “there’s a chance they could have all been selected. I haven’t had a chance to look through everything yet including the victims profiles and family interviews. What I just told you is what Gordon relayed to me.”

“Is there a chance they all knew the killer?”

“That's currently unclear.” Bruce answers grimly. “They seemed to have been taken at different locations, at different times of the day, different days of the week, in different scenarios. One was walking home from school, another was out meeting friends, one was out clubbing, another was at the park.”

“I’m guessing interviews with friends and families haven’t put a light on anything yet. Surely the police would have picked up on something by now.” Tim drops the piece of paper onto the table, already thinking about the ways to take this further and to gather his own information.

“That’s where we come in. We have connections the police don’t, Gordon’s hoping we can find something they didn’t.”

Tim huffs and rolls his eyes. “Doing the police’s job, surprise, surprise.” Bruce immediately scolds him for the comment and Tim puts his hands up in a placating gesture. Glancing at the time Tim realises how late it is. “I’m going to call it a night but tomorrow I’ll have a look into the interview notes and start trying to connect something.”

Bruce looks like he’s about to say something, that something probably being about Tim not getting involved but it seems like he changes his mind because he snaps his mouth shut and nods in answer. Tim bids him a goodnight before retreating from the cave with the case at the forefront of his mind.

Predictably sleep that night didn’t come easily, Tim probably caught an hour maybe two at the most. He was up early the next morning and after a two hour gym session he settles himself at his desk in his room pouring over case notes from the previous night.

It’s certainly a complicated case, Tim can now understand why the police were having trouble connecting the dots with it. Even after looking at the case for several hours Tim is struggling to find a link between the victims and what could be the killer’s MO.

Letting out a huff in frustration Tim decides it’s a good time for a break. He’s out of coffee and it would be good to give his legs a stretch. As he makes his way down to the kitchen from his bedroom he could hear the Manor’s occupants moving around, with it now being late morning it seems like the rest of the house are awake, unless they need to be none of them were actually morning people.

When he gets to the kitchen he greets Alfred and prepares himself a cup of coffee but also sorts himself out a bagel to munch on while he does so. Once he’s got a steaming cup of joe he starts making his way back to his room to carry on with the case and attempt to finally make the connection he's missing.

As he walks along the corridors to his room Tim happens to pass the library and coming from the room Tim could hear a melody being played, something calming, cantabile, and almost sensuous, it’s only when he peers into the room itself he finds Damian practising his music on the cello. Tim watches him for a moment, his movements making it look like playing the instrument is effortless. Damian’s always had a natural talent for music, Tim’s not sure if that’s because of his upbringing or just him as a person but either way Tim admits the kid is good at it.

Not wanting to get caught creeping on Damian, Tim leaves the room and as he walks the melody slowly fades away the further he gets. It’s only when he sits back down at his desk he realises he’s humming the tune Damian had been playing on the cello. Huffing he shakes his head and clears his mind of the music, this case needs his full attention and humming a noncommittal tune isn’t going to help anything.

An hour later Tim’s re-reading through the victim’s families and friends interviews, he’s already poured over it twice but he’s checking again because he’s positive there’s something hidden that he can use as a lead. He finds himself humming once more and rolls his eyes at his own actions, who knows how long he had been doing it for before he realised, however this time he doesn’t force himself to stop, he lets himself hum away as he continues to read the latest victim’s best friend’s interview with the police.

It's here when he finally picks up on something. It’s a small detail and now he’s looking at it he can see how it’s been overlooked but having Damian’s tune in his head it may have helped him notice it this time. The victim’s best friend has claimed that the victim had been complaining about hearing melodic tune days before they disappeared. Apparently it’s one of the only unusual behaviours the victim had shown before getting kidnapped, the police had written this off and nothing more came from it.

Believing this to be something more, Tim skims through the other interviews looking to see if any other claims of a similar fashion were made. It could be nothing or it could be everything. When he notes four out of the five victims had claimed about a melodic tune Tim knows this is something. He throws his hands up in the air and shouts in victory as he's finally found something in this case.

Gathering up his notes Tim hurries out of his room in the search for Bruce. As he runs around the manner shouting for his adoptive father he passes a confused looking Cass and a sweaty Jason who’s just finished a workout, Tim eventually finds Bruce in his study. Barging into the man’s office Bruce looks up and scowls at him, Tim really does know better than to just barge in like that but that isn’t important right now. He strides forward and slaps his papers down on the desk in front of Bruce not paying any attention to the paperwork the man is currently doing.

Tim explains, rather expeditiously, what he found and what he thinks it could mean. Bruce listens patiently, but whether that's because he’s genuinely interested or just humouring him Tim doesn’t know, but the man doesn’t argue against his findings so that has to mean something.

Almost half an hour later Bruce gives him permission to explore this discovery in more depth as long as he’s careful and doesn’t cross any boundaries. Tim lets out a snort at that, what boundaries, Tim is the golden child when it comes to following rules when chasing up a lead, there’s no need for Bruce to worry about it. He could tell Bruce didn’t believe him when he promised to be on his best behaviour but before the man could take back what he said, Tim thanks him and hurries out of the room.

It takes Tim several days to gather the information he needs and to create a plan of action. By the time he’s ready to go half of the week’s gone by, there hasn’t been a death this week but Tim knows (as bad as it is to even think about) it won’t be long until the killer strikes again with another unfortunate victim, that’s if the killer sticks to their pattern of one death a week. It still isn’t clear to what the killer’s MO is yet.

On Thursday night Tim suits up and heads out into the city. His plan is to visit some of the friendship groups the victims had been in; Tim had worked out they liked to hang out in the city late at night a few times a week and he's going to do his best to get around to as many of these groups as he could in one night.

His first stop is by a night club where the second victim liked to hang out. The friendship group were where he expected them to be, gathering on the other side of the street of the club clearly waiting for something and it’s when the group moves into the alleyway between two buildings that Tim makes a move to approach them.

Cutting across the rooftops Tim sneaks from up above and drops down stealthily behind the group. He waits a beat, purely for his own amusement to see how long it would take them to notice him, but when they don’t notice a masked figure lurking behind them Tim pointedly clears his throat and finally gains their attention.

The group has a mixture of reactions to his appearance. Some yelp and take a few steps backwards, one gets into a defensive stance and another even pulls out a pocketknife. Tim of course is unimpressed and rolls his eyes at the group.

“Look,” he starts, speaking to the rattled group of young adults, “I’m here to ask a couple questions about your friend who had passed a few weeks back.”

One of the girls in the group snorts. “You mean brutally murdered! She didn’t do anything! She didn’t deserve it.”

Before Tim could respond the guy with the pocketknife is speaking up, he steps in front of the group putting himself closet to Tim and holds the knife out in front of him. “No way man! We’ve already spoke to the police, we ain’t speaking to you either.”

Tim takes a breath to control himself because snapping at these people won’t get him anywhere. Once he’s composed he says, “I’m not the police, I’m just following up a lead on the case. Before your friend passed did she say anything about hearing a melodic tune?”

The group is silent and blinking at him as if he grew a second head. A beat goes by, and then another, and shakes his head before asking the question again, this time elaborating a bit more on what he meant.

This gets him a response, the girl who spoke earlier gives him an answer. “She complained about hearing a tune coming from her phone and how she couldn’t work out what it was. At first she had thought it was a notification but then it kept happening until she…. y’know.”

Tim hums in thought. That’s more detail than what the reports give. “What else do you know about the noise? What did it sound like? How often did it occur?”

The girl shrugs helplessly. Refraining from snapping at her Tim asks her some more elaborate questions trying to prompt her to answer but it seems hopeless, the girl – and the rest of the group – didn’t know anything more. Mentally filing those details for later, Tim dismisses them and gets ready to head off for the next group.

The second group, a trio of girls leaving the cinema, were just as helpful as the first. It had been pure coincidence Tim found them, he had been passing by and there they conveniently were, he managed to catch them at a corner of a quiet block and speak to them. They had no knowledge other than confirming their friend had complained about a noise coming form her phone which wasn’t a notification but they gave nothing more in depth than that. Tim thanked them and carried on with his night.

His third try of the night seemed to be the most informative of the bunch. He tracked down the best friend of the fourth victim leaving a restaurant after closing up for the night. Scaring the daylights out of the guy, Tim drops down in front of him in the alleyway where the back entrance of the restaurant is. The poor soul literally jumps in the air and drops his keys down onto the mangy floor, Tim watches from his spot as the guy picks them up with shaking hands.

“Sorry for scaring you like that.” Tim apologies, just because he's a vigilante it doesn’t mean he’s an asshole. “Sorry for your loss but if you have a moment I would like to ask a couple questions about your friend who passed recently.”

The guy swallows and nods his head, he’s shaking all over and Tim knows that it isn’t because he’s cold. Despite agreeing he still says, “I’ve already spoken to the police though.”

Tim nods, humming understandably. “I know but I’m following a lead they haven’t, also I’m not the police as you can see.” Tim pauses to give the guy a moment to compose himself before continuing. “Before he… disappeared, did your friend ever complain about hearing a melodic tune coming from his phone that wasn’t a notification?”

The guy’s eyes widen in what Tim would say is recognition. He nods but looks also looks unsure. “Yeah he did. He had complained about it for days before he… He couldn’t work out what was causing the sounds, at first he thought it was an app and then he thought he had been hacked but after getting his phone checked to find it virus free he had no idea.”

“Did he ever describe what the noise sounded like?”

“No, but I heard it a few times myself.” The guy tells him and Tim immediately straightens up, this is the first time anyone’s heard the noise. “It went from a high noise to a low noise, only a few notes and then it stopped. I remember him complaining about it happening four times a day, then the day after he told me it happened three times and the day after that twice. That was the last time I heard from him… It seemed like it was a count down or something.”

“Did you mention that to the police?”

“No, not in that much detail. I guess I didn’t think about it again until you asked. My best friend had just been found murdered, it’s kind of the last thing on my mind y’know.”

Tim hums thinking it all through. This is the most detail he’s gotten so far but it still doesn’t help him to solve the problem and how it can all be linked back to the killer. Humming he asks, “what was the noise like though? You say high to low, can you describe it in any more detail?”

The guy shrugs looking uncomfortable and unsure. “I don’t know! Um, like tings I guess?” He blinks and looks off into the distance and Tim could see he’s trying to come up with the right words to describe it. When he looks back at Tim his face has brightened, as if a light bulb has flicked on inside his head. “It sounded like one of those instruments you play when you whack the wood and it makes a sound. They go in size order and the smaller ones make the high pitched noises.”

It's Tim’s turn to blink at the guy. He raises an eyebrow underneath his mask. “Are you on about a xylophone? The noise coming from the phone is a xylophone tune.”

The guy shrugs, “if that’s what it’s called then yeah.”

Despite having some clearer descriptions it doesn’t do much to help Tim solve anything. Deciding that's as far as he’s going to get that night, he bids the guy a goodnight before heading back for the rooftops so he could start making his way back to the Manor. He’s got a lot to think about.

Over the next couple of days the case leaves Tim on edge. He’s obsessively thinking about it and continuously going over every detail he could to try and work out the mystery killer and how they’re linked to a xylophone. Tim had done everything he could to try and figure it out, he even went to Commissioner Gordon and asked for the victim’s phones but Gordon had denied him access stating they’ve all been disabled after they were ruled out from being a lead by the detectives.

His breakthrough on the case occurred on Saturday at lunchtime and it’s all because of Damian. Some of the family were gathered in the kitchen preparing lunch (or more accurately waiting for Alfred to prepare lunch) and that’s when Tim hears a musical tune going off, something that sounded very familiar to what he had heard be described. Tim’s head whips up from where he had been looking down at some papers on the kitchen island and he’s just in time to witness Damian looking at his phone with a huff.

A pit of dread occurs inside of Tim at the implications of what that could mean.

“What was that noise?” He questions Damian rather bluntly.

Damian gives him the stink eye but Tim isn’t deterred. “It’s none of your business Drake.”

From the other side of the island Jason snorts. “I wouldn’t have expected the demon brat to have a chirpy text tone like that. Hot chick messaging you Damian?”

Damian looks disgusted at Jason’s suggestion. “Don’t be absurd Todd.”

“Seriously Damian,” Tim stresses out now, “what was that tune and how long has it been going on for?”

It seems like Damian catches onto the fact Tim isn’t joking around. The kid narrows his eyes at him for a moment before he finally responds, his voice having less spite to it than it previously did and this time holds more caution.

“It occurs randomly on my phone and it isn’t any notifications. I’m not sure what it is and I’ve tried to work it out but so far I have been unsuccessful.” He tells Tim with a suspicious glint in his eyes.

“How long has it been going on for? How many times a day does is occur?”

“What’s with the questions Drake?” Damian snaps, annoyed at Tim’s persistence.

Tim slaps his hands down on the island and stares hard at Damian. “Just answer the questions brat. How long for and how often?”

Damian makes his infamous ‘tt’ sound before finally answering. “That’s the first time today. It happened twice yesterday, three times the day before and four times the day before that.”

Tim blinks at Damian as his mind goes into overdrive. If the pattern he thinks he’s made holds true, then Damian is the next target. A target that’ll disappear tomorrow.

Whatever his facial expression is showing it’s enough to alert the room. Jason is the one to ask the obvious question. “What does that mean Tim? What’s going on?”

Tim doesn’t respond, instead he stands up and gestures for Damian’s phone. “Give me your phone.” When the kid doesn’t move Tim snaps at him. “Now!”

For once Damian doesn’t argue with him and hands over his device Tim takes it and immediately heads for the exit. “One of you get Bruce and tell him to meet me in the cave.”

Behind him Damian lets out a protest and follows him out of the kitchen. He demands Tim to tell him what’s going on all the way to the cave. It’s only when he's at the computer Tim explains to him what’s going on and what that tune means. While he talks Damian goes very quiet and pale, now understanding how serious the situation is. To Tim’s surprise it must shake Damian quite a bit because the kid doesn’t argue, doesn’t even defend himself by saying ‘he can handle this so called killer because he’s a trained assassin.’

By the time Bruce arrives at the cave, looking somewhat frazzled and obviously disturbed by the news that his youngest son could be the next target of the serial killer going around, Tim is digging through Damian’s phone trying to track the signal of the tune. Bruce immediately demands an explanation to what’s going on and Tim doesn’t hesitate to explain what’s happened.

The rest of the afternoon is spent in a lot of frustration and stress as Tim, Bruce and Babs were doing everything they could think of trying to locate the source of the tune coming from Damian’s phone. They work well into the evening and night and not once have they been disturbed, not even Alfred has attempted to pull the three of them away from the computer. Damian occasionally comes by and while he does his best to hide it it’s clear the situation has shaken him up, but unable to help in the current search all he does is hover nearby restlessly until someone else (most likely Jason or Dick) pries him away to distract him.

It's nearing midnight when they finally get their breakthrough. Well Babs does, Tim and Bruce just happen to be there when she does.

Babs has managed to pinpoint an estimated location of the killer within a 3 mile radius in the southern part of Gotham. It’s a wide stretch but it’s more than what they’ve previously had. As soon as Tim gets the location he’s on call to those on patrol that night, himself and Bruce obviously excluded that night, and directs them all to the area.

Tim would have happily suited up and gone there himself, he’s sure Bruce feels the same, however with them being on the other side of the city it would’ve taken them too long to get there, it was much quicker and more efficient to send the others who are already out in the city there instead.

Once Tim sent the team there the three of them were then made to play the waiting game. Babs, already on it, hacked into nearby security cameras of the area and was flicking through the different options available. There were different angles from buildings, streetlamps and traffic lights, on occasional they would see one family member breeze by a particular camera before they were gone again.

After almost 45 minutes of anxious waiting it’s Dick who calls in after spotting their potential serial killer. Getting Dick’s exact location Bruce makes a call to Commissioner Gordon to update him on the situation and on the other line Dick announces he's going to scope the place out. It’s not even 5 minutes later when Dick calls back announcing he’s found the killer. Apparently different rooms of the tiny apartment space the killer is currently residing in is full of maps and images of the victims, Dick relays there’s a pin board with details of the victims and even potential future targets. Dick’s voice stutters when he tells them Damian’s picture is on the board.

Once it’s confirmed the police are on their way to that apartment Dick retreats from the space and hovers nearby, back in the cave the three of them watch the scene unfold through a nearby traffic light camera. They watch as the police raid the place and it’s another 20 minutes before they see them reappear again this time accompanied by a woman in handcuffs looking like she hates the world.

When Gordon calls Bruce sometime later, the Commissioner lets him know that she’s the killer. Everything in that apartment confirms it was her and then there’s the admission she said herself of killing the kids, the sick woman going as far as to say how much she enjoyed it and how much she had been looking forward to getting her hands on more innocents.

It’s only when Bruce finally hangs up the phone Tim knows it’s all over. The case is finally closed (at least on their end). Damian is safe, she won’t be hurting any more kids and by extension families.

Tim sighs in relief and slumps back in the chair he’s been sat on all day. Now that his mind isn’t distracted he could feel how tense his body has become and suddenly how hungry he is. Tim makes a plan in his mind to visit the kitchen before retreating to his room and not emerging for several days, after the week he’s had dealing with this case he deserves a couple days off, perhaps he could call Kon up and go visit him on the farm instead? It’d be nice to get away from the city for a little while and see his best friend at the same time too.

He’ll work that out later, for now though he forces his stiff body out of the chair and cracks his back as he stands. “God, I’m getting old.” He mutters to himself as several of his joints pop when he stretches, he then laughs when Bruce and Babs send him identical looks of exasperation at his comment.

“Now the killer has been caught and is police custody I’m calling it a night.” He announces. “After this case I seriously never want to hear a xylophone tune ever again, that drove me insane trying to work that out.”

“You and me both.” Babs commiserates with a smile.

As he’s leaving the cave, Bruce speaks up, “well done for this week Tim, that’s really good work and much dedication you put into the case.”

At his compliment Tim feels himself flush and stutters out a thank you. Even now, years later after working under Bruce for so long, Tim still isn’t entirely used to getting praise for his work from the man. It doesn’t mean he doesn’t appreciate it, it just sometimes still shocks him when it occurs.

As he ascends up the stairs towards the Manor, Tim knows there are still unanswered questions to the case, things he hadn’t been able to figure out himself but he’s sure those answers will come with time once the killer has been interviewed and trialled. He’s going to be keeping an eye out for that over the next few weeks, but for now he’s going to switch off, grab some food and then pass out for the next three days because he’s earned it.

#batfam alphabet #Tim Drake #bruce wayne #Damian Wayne #Jason Todd #case fic #serial killer case #calling cards #musical tune #batfamily #protective siblings #don't ask how I came up with this #also don't expect anything grand #it's unrealistic #but it was fun to write #it's almost 5k words #it got out of hand #light humour #light angst #fanfiction

[randomvarious]

Today’s compilation:

Totally Hits 2001 2001 R&B / Hip Hop / Pop / Pop-Rock

Fuuuuuuck, man. Can we please just go back to the year 2001? Y'know, before *the big main event* happened? Top 40 and hip hop/R&B radio were sooo good back then!! 😭

And here's an excellent collection of radio bops to prove it, put out by Totally Hits, the main, always-runner-up to the ever-dominant Now That's What I Call Music! series. I feel like a lot of people aren't aware of this, but, while the US run of the Now series was originally made up of a partnership between Universal and EMI and all their many subsidiaries, Totally Hits was its answer, provided by BMG and Warner Bros. and all of their subsidiaries. (And BMG also includes Sony, mind you.) So, while Now always outsold Totally Hits and released their albums more frequently, and also had a bigger pool of pop songs to pick from, Totally Hits definitely wasn't a slouch either, especially with this 2001 installment; they had plenty of goods to offer that Now couldn't.

But I don't even know where to start with this thing. Like, nearly all of this CD holds a special place in my heart. Those classic strings from Blu Cantrell's "Hit 'Em Up (Oops!)" ignite and my inner child just immediately activates 🥺.

So I guess I'll just pepper this post with some observations and fun facts about a bunch of these songs then...

Diddy and co.'s "Bad Boy for Life" still bangs hard to this very day. Its beat sounds just as nuts now as it did the day when it first came out 21+ years ago. I mean, I’ve still yet to hear anything else quite like it. And it was made by this dude Megahertz, who also produced Nas' "Got Ur Self a Gun" in the same year. And while the song only peaked at #33 on Billboard’s Hot 100, its “there goes the neighborhood”-themed music video was in *super* heavy rotation on MTV and featured an extended cameo from Ben Stiller, along with other cameos from Xzibit, Ice Cube, Snoop Dogg, Shaq, Mike Tyson, Baron Davis, Travis Barker, Dave Navarro, Access Hollywood’s Pat O’Brien, Fonzworth Bentley, fucking Crazy Town, and weirdly enough, the character actor Richard Dunn, who’d wind up playing a bunch of different roles on Tim and Eric Awesome Show, Great Job! some years later.

Does anyone else remember that early 2000s rap and R&B fad that was obsessed with making South Asian-sounding beats? Did Timbaland start that whole trend with Missy Elliott's bhangra-infused "Get Ur Freak On"? I could be wrong, but it feels like he did? 🤔

Here's what I think is the most slept-on song out of this entire slate: the remix of Dream's "This Is Me." I actually totally forgot that this song even existed, but this CD helped jog my memory. Do you even remember Dream? No, not The-Dream, but Dream; the ultimately fleeting female R&B and pop quartet that were most famous for that song "He Loves U Not." Anyway, they were on Bad Boy and Mario Winans took the original version of "This Is Me" and remixed it to include a sample of the bells from Bob James' "Take Me to the Mardi Gras," which is one of those samples I go nuts for every time I hear it. I first heard it in Snap!'s "The Power" and I've loved it dearly ever since. It also appears towards the end of Missy Elliott’s “Work It.”

Those who call Eve 6 a one-hit wonder are just flat-out wrong. "Here's to the Night," a soft, Police-inspired follow-up to the catharsis of “Inside Out” (the “heart in a blender” song), only placed two spots below it on the Hot 100.

It’s really funny and interesting how Uncle Kracker (what a stupid name) came out of the Kid Rock milieu as the turntablist in his backing band (lmao), and then, despite being a rapper, rose to immense adult contemporary fame with “Follow Me” and then a cover of Dobie Gray’s “Drift Away” (🎶Give me the beat boys and free my soul🎶). It also seems like Kid Rock kinda followed in his footsteps too, dropping his brash, working class, trailer park asshole gimmick for a quick sec to make “Picture” with Sheryl Crow the following year 🤔.

Remember “I Do!!” by Toya? It was her only hit, but that catchy, midtempo R&B groove was 🔥. Produced by this guy Antoine “Bam” Macon, who then went on to co-produce Nelly and Kelly Rowland’s “Dilemma.” Toya would release one more single after this one, which didn’t fare too well, and then she’d appear on Cam’Ron’s 2002 classic, “Hey Ma,” before falling all the way off.

We gotta talk about Willa Ford too. It shouldn’t come as a surprise to anyone that the people who produced “I Wanna Be Bad” also produced a bunch of songs for Britney Spears as well. Willa says she wasn’t trying to copy Britney, but damn, does this sound like a Britney song! Also, what on earth is Eminem friend-and-foe-and-friend-again Royce da 5′9″ doing on this?!?!?

           Oh yeah, and we can’t ignore this from Willa either:

That article was then followed up with this:

Which then allows for the perfect use of this meme:

Is there a stronger trio of singles to come from a rap album than the one that came from OutKast’s Stankonia? I mean, how can you beat “B.O.B.,” “Ms. Jackson,” and “So Fresh, So Clean”? I really don’t think you can. The production group of Organized Noize had a large hand in OutKast’s first four albums, and one of their members, Sleepy Brown, also provides the falsetto parts on the chorus for “So Fresh, So Clean.”

Why wasn’t Craig David a bigger thing in the US? He could’ve been our British R&B king, but he only wound up with two successful singles here with “Fill Me In” and “7 Days.” “7 Days” actually performed better on the Hot 100, but I feel like “Fill Me In” is far more remembered in the States. Anyway, despite his brief showing here, he managed to stay relevant all the way into the 2010s back home. Awesome voice and great beats.

Lastly, Dido’s “Thank You.” This song took such a long path to reach #3 on the Hot 100. It actually first came out in 1998, appearing on the soundtrack to an indie flick called Sliding Doors that starred Gwyneth Paltrow. Then, in ‘99, it was included on Dido’s debut album, No Angel. Following that, Eminem released The Marshall Mathers LP in 2000, which included “Stan,” a song that made the chorus from “Thank You” its own. Naturally, that helped to increased the popularity of “Thank You” itself and Dido then released it as a single in September of 2000. Then a couple months later, Eminem released “Stan” as a single too. Finally, in January of 2001, “Thank You” entered the Hot 100 at the #80 spot, and by April it had climbed all the way up to #3. It then stayed on the chart until September and became one of the biggest hits of 2001.

What a fucking nostalgia rush this whole thing was. Radio was at its absolute peak in these days. Just so many good and fun songs. Take me back! 

More of these installments from Totally Hits and Now in the near offing, so if you enjoyed this post, stay tuned!

Highlights:

Blu Cantrell - "Hit 'Em Up Style (Oops!)" 112 - "Peaches & Cream" Missy Elliott - "Get Ur Freak On" P. Diddy, Black Rob and Mark Curry - "Bad Boy for Life" Dream feat. Kain - "This Is Me (Remix)" Usher - "U Remind Me" O-Town - "All or Nothing" Eve 6 - "Here's to the Night" Uncle Kracker - "Follow Me" LFO - "Every Other Time" Sugar Ray - "When It's Over" Willa Ford - "I Wanna Be Bad" Toya - "I Do!!" OutKast - "So Fresh, So Clean" Ludacris feat. Shawna - "What's Your Fantasy" Craig David - "Fill Me In" Dido - "Thank You"

P.S.: I wrote a long Twitter thread about almost all of the songs on this album. I only covered a little more than half of them here in this post, so if you want more observations and fun trivia, check it out!

#r&b #r & b #hip hop #rap #pop #pop rock #rock #music #2000s #2000s music #2000's #2000's music #00s #00s music #00's #00's music #90s #90s music #90's #90's music

[ridiasfangirlings]

theres this south park episode where two kids get shipped by some asian girls and the whole town of south park starts shipping them too, so they fake a break up so everyone will leave them alone but it backfires bc one of them is a lil too good at acting and accidentally makes everyone believe the other guy cheated on him. The whole town becomes depressed and at the end they get back together to make everyone happy again, so like imagine that but with sarumi lol I had a south park phase a couple of months ago, I'm sorry. It's from the episode "tweek x Craig" btw!

Somehow I imagine this happening post-ROK, where all the clans assume Yata and Fushimi are dating (and they would be correct on that). Like say Yata and Fushimi have been spending more and more time together as they start becoming friends again and maybe they are actually crushing on each other but neither one is able to admit it. Of course their respective clans have noticed that they're spending all this time together and they all support this relationship, like the S4 boys know that Fushimi's been interested in Yata all this time and they think it's wonderful that he and Yata have finally gotten together. One day Doumyouji and Hidaka are visiting Bar Homra and Fushimi happens to stop by to pick Yata up, after they leave Hidaka says it's nice they finally hooked up. The Homra guys are like wait they finally hooked up, no one said anything to us. Hidaka's like isn't it obvious and thinking about it the Homra boys have to agree, like yeah they do spend a lot of time together and Yata seems way happier now that he and Fushimi aren't enemies, I guess they're finally dating.

The rumor even gets over to the Silvers and now three clans are shipping it. Yata finds out when one of the Homra guys accidentally lets it slip that they're all supporting him, Yata's like wait supporting me in what and the Homra guys are like you and your relationship with Fushimi. At the same time Fushimi overhears some of the S4 alphabet talking about him dating Yata and he wonders if Yata told them something. Yata calls him right about this time and they meet up to talk about it, Yata's like yeah I don't know why everyone thinks we're dating, giving this weak laugh and maybe also trying to not very subtly find out if Fushimi is, like, into this idea because Yata might be. Unfortunately since this is an emotion thing Fushimi absolutely misses Yata's not subtle hints and instead takes this as Yata admitting that he isn't interested in Fushimi at all and Fushimi figures well why would he be of course he only wants to be friends it was stupid of Fushimi to hope otherwise. Fushimi says it's annoying that everyone keeps gossiping and Yata's like 'I guess...we could break up?'. Fushimi shrugs and is like yeah I guess we could, it would make everyone leave us alone. Yata's like all right cool so we can like break up in front of everyone and then go on being just friends. Fushimi's like right just friends. Yata smiles all totally just friends nothing else and Fushimi agrees, just friends.

So a couple days later Homra and S4 have a mission together and when the mission is over Yata and Fushimi put their plan into motion and have a fake fight (somehow I imagine this fools everyone except Munakata, who's already been in this rodeo so to speak). They 'break up' in front of everyone and separate, Yata sending Fushimi a text afterward just to remind him that this was all fake because he is a bit worried about Fushimi taking things personally. Fushimi texts back that he knows that but maybe he really is somewhat gloomy because this is just a reminder that Yata won't ever love him. Unfortunately the squad have been around him long enough that they can tell Fushimi is extra gloomy and now they assume Yata must have broken his heart. Doumyouji idly comments that didn't one of the things Yata said sound kinda like he cheated on Fushimi-san and this immediately gets the rumor mill going, eventually Yata walks into Bar Homra to see everyone glaring at him and even Chitose is like seriously Yata cheating isn't cool.

Yata wants to walk the whole thing back now because he's tired of being called a cheater and anyway doesn't it seem like everyone's in a bad mood now that we 'broke up.' Fushimi clicks his tongue all are you trying to get me to take you back, being mostly sarcastic but Yata's like actually I think I am. Fushimi gives him this acid look like I'm not going to be your fake boyfriend Misaki and Yata gives this nervous cough as he's like 'well...what if you were my real boyfriend?'. Fushimi freezes and Yata ends up admitting all his feelings, that he was actually really happy when he thought Fushimi might want to really date him and he didn't want to ruin their friendship but he's been in love with Fushimi since middle school even if it took a super long time to realize it. Fushimi eventually admits his own feelings too, they kiss and agree to 'get back together.' Yata's like and you'll tell everyone I didn't cheat right and Fushimi gets this wicked grin as he's like I don't know, maybe you need to make it up to me first.

#sarumi #Talking K #imagine them 'breaking up' #trying to make it sound real without bringing up old wounds #and then they have to keep meeting secretly on the side #and at some point Yata's like why does it feel like we're actually dating #so he just goes with it

[moon-kissed-witch]

The signs as things that I did not learn until adulthood

Aries: Schwarzenegger had a himbo era. That's what inspired this post but not why I'm giving it to Aries. You guys just have that energy. Own it, I guess. You might end up being a Governator idfk

Taurus: That plantains are real and not just the sims way of saying banana. I thought this was just the sims creators being silly.

Gemini: Those toads that shoot blood out of their eyes are actually lizards. Also that scorpions are arachnids. And that I will always know less about this general topic than any mountain redneck I've encountered.

Cancer: I still don't really know who Al Gore is. Like, I kinda do, but most of that knowledge comes from South Park. I have learned in adulthood that knowing things like that has very little impact on my life, much to the contrary of what I learned in school, and my brain cells are few in number and already working overtime. I don't think I could learn about this if I tried.

Leo: That I actually am hot af I just have low self esteem. Also that you can push tampons out with your muscles. Flex that sex biiitch

Virgo: Not knowing many adult things is actually not that abnormal and we all Google what to do when something happens. Or we call our parents, friends, or grandma. Then we do our best and that's usually enough.

Libra: The cuter that something is, the more likely it is to destroy your life. Soft fluffy blanket be so fall aesthetic but will kill you from heat stroke at night. Puppies will destroy everything they can and will continue to do so unless you work with them on it. Attractive humans - self explanatory. Not a guarantee it'll ruin your life, but if you have a gambling problem don't get a puppy.

Scorpio: Teen angst doesn't go away it just becomes adult angst about doing the dishes and how you have to work your ass off to pay rent but then you go to the grocery store and think "Fuck, I need trash bags and paper towels" and you come to hold a deep seated hatred for these things. The teen angst that you formerly held for your parents is now transferred to toilet paper.

Sagittarius: If someone is staring at you, stare back. More aggressively. Scare them off. If they're a creep, you've now made them aware that you're aware of them. If they're just rude/judgmental, you've put not only the fear of God in them but the fear of you . You don't have to even do anything. It's about the eye contact. Works every time I'm out in public and someone is annoying me.

Capricorn: If you put the fucking lid down in a port a potty the smell vents out, like it is supposed to because that's why the vent is there in the first place. And every time you've gone into one with the lid up, that smell of nastiness could've been a lil less awful but the other person ruined it. I always knew that if you flush with the lid open you get particles everywhere, including what you wipe your face/body with and what you use to brush your teeth, but I didn't know about the port a potty thing. Now that I do I'm angry at everyone else.

Aquarius: People die while/from shitting way, way more often than I thought would ever be possible. Specifically I learned this because it's very possible that the "lol Elvis died on the toilet" thing is not only true but that due to the combination of both his heart being weakened by substance abuse and that he was trying to push out four months worth of shit, it caused his heart attack. And people also death by diarrhea. It counts for 1 in 9 deaths of children under the age of five worldwide.

Pisces: Buttermilk doesn't actually have butter. I learned this and thought to myself "Did you really just think that it was milk with a stick of butter in it?" only to realize that, yes, that is exactly what I thought. I had never examined this thought further.

#dumbass astrology

[wendytestabrat]

I’ve never been that much into shipping like literally I’m one of the most boring and logical people ever and when I watch most shows I just care about the plot and don’t rlly give a fuck when it’s soiled with a bunch of corny romances (except if it’s actually interesting and the two people have an entertaining dynamic that adds to the story and gives conflict and shit). This is exactly how the last few seasons of Regular Show were ruined bc it was all about relationships (even tho I love Rigby & Eileen together ngl LOL), as well as iCarly like the whole fucking Creddie vs Seddie war ruined the show, I doubt Freddie was supposed to end up with anyone but it’s like the writers felt pressured to put in that dumbass Seddie storyline bc shippers were obsessed. So I understand why people don’t care for Kyman or any South Park ship and just wanna watch the show, I mean I was like this too I used to not give a fuck and found the South Park shippers annoying. I only liked Stendy bc it was canon, and then Kyman grew on me over time, and I started to like Creek when it became canon too, but every other ship in the fandom is mostly trash imo LOL. But srsly ya’ll are dumb as hell for not seeing that there’s clearly something going on between Cartman & Kyle at this point, especially after Kyle went ballistic after seeing Cartman with someone else TWICE….I’m like bruh how can anyone interpret this as anything other than jealousy. DHSJJS I’m sure you could totally make a case to argue how Kyman isn’t gonna actually happen, bc I agree on some level like South Park is just a comedy, so I feel like a lot of it is all just Matt & Trey trolling everyone and putting in these subliminal messages that don’t amount to anything. And yeah one can also argue that Kyman will never happen bc Cartman & Kyle are both too stubborn to ever admit they care for one another. But I mean I feel like there’s NO WAY at this point that these Kyman moments we keep getting are just fans reading too much into things, I’m sure Matt & Trey know damn well what they’re doing and they’re putting this shit in on purpose as fan service to imply that Cartman & Kyle like each other bc they know so many people ship Kyman. So yeah will Kyman ever actually become canon or happen? Honestly I don’t know, it’s so hard to tell. But I mean Creek happened so it’s not completely out of the realm of possibility and Matt & Trey are always doing unpredictable things and trolling people. I really don’t wanna say that Kyman is for sure gonna happen, but I feel like I can’t completely say it’s not possible either bc I may be wrong either way LOL. But I know for a fact there is tension and subliminal messaging going on and these annoying ass anti-kymans are just gaslighting everyone for pointing out what we can clearly see. If we’re anti-semitic for seeing what’s going on between Cartman & Kyle then I guess Matt & Trey must be anti-semites too bc they’re the ones doing this shit and putting it in the show, not us. (And I’m Jewish btw LOL)

#kyman #south park #KYMANRANTGARBAGE

[laminy]

Sorry if you've already answered this question before it I'm really curious. What made you choose Perth as a place to set your fic, like with the IIS? I love the fic and I love how detailed you are but sorry again if you already answered this ages ago.

firstly, I love questions so even if I had answered this a million times, don’t apologize! it was awesome to see that I had an ask this morning ☺️ thank you!

secondly, no, I don’t think anyone has ever asked before! I only wish that I knew where my notebook was from the early days of ITBASM to answer this well, it’s been awhile.

I will say, I had not been to Perth and I still haven’t been to Perth (though I do hope to go over sometime in the next few years) so it wasn’t a personal affinity for it specifically. My main considerations at the start were mostly, “where is secluded enough that the Mercury could be built and take off from without large groups of people noticing?” Obviously, in hypothetical 1930s UK, there would be a LOT of green space. So, the piece I can’t remember exactly is why I chose the Cairngorms specifically over any other chunk of land, though I remember googling national parks in the UK for location ideas. I think I knew I didn’t want it to be Ireland because I wanted the characters to just zip around on trains and not have to fly every time they go to London. But I don’t know why I didn’t pick Wales, or anything other place. My best guess would be that I had just been to Edinburgh so I’m sure that was an influence.

Once I decided on the Cairngorms as the place where the Mercury was going to take off from and where Gwil and Rami did their training, then I really just looked at a map of it and picked a spot in the park that I thought looked best to have a training centre: close to some roads, but also pretty far away, in the south to be nearer to Edinburgh. Then Perth was just the closest city to that spot. Dundee was a little further out, and a little bigger, so I liked the idea of Rami and Gwil and the others living in this smaller city, near the training centre, where every day everyone could be driven in together, but still on a major railway where they could travel home to see family.

The things about Brian May’s mum being from Perth, and a train from Perth crashing in the 1950s, I didn’t find them out until after I’d already started writing.

I didn’t always know that the story would end with them moving back to Perth (I had other places in mind originally) but I knew for awhile before it actually happened in the story. Then I just needed to get them there.

#answering asks #into the blue and sunny morn'