#but it's not fucking in the ask box!

[sassydistresseddamsel]

Flash sale right anyone who buys my premium content in the next 2 hours gets a 50% discount and a sex video call 💦💦💋💋💋

#sexy content #sexy breast #sexy titts #barbie #i sell content #i sell custom content #i sell newds #i sell noods #so fucking sexy #sexy ebony #little tease #i sell dropbox #buy my dropbox #tit drop #dropboxlinks #content seller #content sale #newds for sale #noods for sale #sale #video call #custom newds #spicy newds #buying newds #ask me about my dropbox #drop boxes #hot nude #custom noods #dm for noods #noods4sale

[4ndeka]

god help anyone who disrespected his queen

#fuck me i forgot one of his legs #shit #karniss #kar'niss #bg3 #baldur's gate 3 #drider #spider #I LOVE HIM OKAY #i wanna give him a cup of sleepy time tea #and point at the bear on the box and ask him if he likes the bear #(he would say yes)

[thatdeadaquarius]

sagau with the language barrier issue except... the creator is sick and tired of trying to ask for things so they do everything themself.

and it gives their followers mass anxiety bc they can't even ask what you're doing... bc they know they won't understand anything...

SUCH A GENIUS NARVI 10/10 GOOD WORK SORRY IM SUPER LATE BUT THIS IS *chefs kiss*

Like, that's literally how I feel like I first played Genshin LMAO

Also this has a cont. Part 2 at the bottom bc tumblr fucking hates me UPDATE I FIXED IT THANK FUCK

Paimon was like "and then we go to Mondstadt- ! NO, not Wolvendom, to Mondstadt! NOT THE THOUSAND WIND TEMPLE WITH ENEMIES OUT OF UR LEAGUE, ENTER MONDSTADT FOR THE FIRST TIME BEFORE U EXPLORE THE REST OF THE MAP!! >:("

SO MANY IDEAS YET SO LITTLE WRITING SKILL GUYS HELP-

Also warning this is ROUGH in terms of spelling and editing and im so sorry abt that! I have my art show today so you're welcome to come back if you want to see it a little more readable tomorrow lmao

Edit Update 4/6/23:

Revised and fixed all the bad spelling and grammar (hopefully) so make sure to give another read if you havent read the cleaned up version lol

I dont have a beta reader so its just me trying my best ok-

Everything was like kinda chaos tbh at first

WOW- MY FIRST 1,000+ NOTES POST??!?! U GUYS, WHAT ARE R YOU DOIN??!!! THANK YOU SO MUCH!! IM GLAD U GUYS ENJOYED IT SM!! Also look out for more encoded stuff in the future since i mentioned wanting to continue stuff like this + ARG stuff :) <3

Edit 9/7/23: 2,000+ NOTES?? THANK YOU???

Like u wake up under the Irminsul, and u think ur hallucinating a goddamn gacha game for like a solid 5 minutes, or ur lucid dreaming, 

but once u actually took what felt like hours to process that u might actually be in fucking Genshin Impact-

Nahida came running from, somewhere?? Its kinda just very floaty dreamy in here so, unclear, she’s beaming with a giddy little smile (💘)

It’s… so much more than what her game model could manage.

I mean, you knew that, of course you did, but- to see the tiny goddess smiling in person, her cute chubby arms waving in the air, her cheeks all plump with baby fat from her excited smile, pretty green eyes that sparkle only in the way excited toddlers do-

It was just…wow. 🥺

You can’t help it, her sheer carefree excitement, exactly like a child but you know that she must be really overwhelmed with joy if shes letting herself act like that so blatantly, you feel ur muscles tug gently into a smile, you try to muffle it but ur happiness leaks out anyway

She's panting as she stumbles on short chubby legs to reach you.

After just staring at you with those big green clover eyes for a few seconds, she physically shakes her head to knock herself out of it,

Nahida places her hand over her heart, and bows elegantly, going back to looking at you with a small but bright smile, her voice is kind of quiet, muffled in a soft way, much like her game depiction,

“Hzozn! R'ev yvvm dzrgrmt gl nvvg blf! R wrwm'g gsrmp blf dlfow wvhxvmw fmgro R dzh zg ovzhg z uvd gslfhzmw bvzih low!” *

…Nahida begins to look a little concerned… her eyes get impossibly bigger.

…Oh no.

♧

Nahida had apparently quickly spread the news that you can’t understand them, but luckily it seems like all the characters still know you!

Alhaitham is pretty much a constant by your side, you knew he was vaguely studying linguistics in the akademiya… but that knowledge still didn’t prepare you to be intensely stared at with his diamond pupils for hours. 💀

Then he’d tap your shoulder or something, and you quickly picked up that he wanted you to just try and say something.

Then he would scribble for hours.

Turns out they can understand you about as much as you understand Teyvat language (s? You can’t even tell if there are multiple languages, that’s how unrecognizable this language is, damn)

The more extroverted or friendly people, like Venti, Yoimiya, Kazuha, Jean, Noelle, Amber, Xingqiu, Hu Tao, Zhongli, Ganyu, Barbara, Beidou, Collei, Ayaka, Gorou, Nilou

At least attempt to talk to you, and try very hard to watch what you gesture with your hands or body language

They're pretty much ready to play charades at all times for you lol

Interestingly enough, they only ever understood you when you typed in the chat (with other ppl)

But even then not immediately, 

Sumeru scholars basically had to make a whole new department (regardless of how much you play with others) to decipher your ancient language (to them) like those old clay tablets with cuneiform we’re still translating?

Like that, your words appear in elemental magic heavy places (so like that abyss lang. It’ll appear on walls or structures, so like Andrius’ stone colosseum? in Wolvendom gained some of your chat replies inscribed and glowing a rainbow of colors on the top edges of the walls)

Much like the abyss language you see throughout genshin, most Teyvat scholars (across nations/internationally) agreed your language is the oldest form of language known!

It’s like modern languages having roots in older ones, like English with Latin, greek, or German roots, or Sanskrit and the Prakrit for Hindi language today

…so of course no one really speaks the root languages anymore, because they’re so old, so those ancestors who spoke those languages would have little to no understanding of their modern counterparts…

◇

Occasionally if you turned your mic on for whatever reason there would be a gentle whisper on the winds in Mondstadt of your voice,

or your laugh in the waves washing ashore in Inazuma and Fontaine,

your startled noises or screams from battling bosses mixed with the landslides in the mountains of Liyue

So they know what you sound like, but that doesn’t mean they understood your language :/

Nahida had been hoping that you’re actual physical form being here would help improve the language barrier

But unfortunately, those things remained the same, but at least you were physically here to talk to now and give more content for the scholars to study rather than them having to make do with your snippets of language from chats

…so needless to say, it took you a long time to realize they viewed you as a god of sorts.

You kind of knew something was up when at least two allogenes were by your sides at all times, or eremites would replace them if they really couldn’t stick around

You figured they knew you weren’t nearly as combatant-ready as they were at all times, hell you obviously didn’t have a vision hanging off you somewhere, and you only really had a knife strapped to a belt, courtesy of the Thirty Corps

You are still kind of convinced that the people of Teyvat, or Sumeru at least, are just pretty polite (and in the allogenes case, very kind or friendly, even people like Alhaitham or Cyno, resting bitch faces they have, seem to soften a little when they’re walking around with you… maybe you’re just imagining it…)

And as much as you would love to wait until they understand you to do something more fun, as you can see the frustration on Tighnari’s face (and his ears try to flatten back hehe) as he looked like he was debating heatedly with some of the Sumeru sages who insist you stay in the city

…so why not go?

It’s not like they’re going to get it anytime soon, and it’s still too frustrating for yourself to charade things or draw things for them because you can’t even hear their guesses 💀

You can totally handle being like the traveler too, 

You still have access to your inventory afterall! Plus, lucky for you, you still find a pass for the Serenitea Pot in your little pocket dimension!

So now you have somewhere to sleep at night, and while most of your stuff went to the traveler’s pack, the things like Primogems

(which.. Okay now you really want primogems bc theyre so pretty and shiny irl)✨️

And other high-level things, or just objects of no use for the traveler (so basically all your hoarded level up stuff and infinite amount of weapons lol) came along with you

So you did have to wander the first week or so around the city and even commission the Adventurer’s Guild to grab you food supplies to cook with

Filling up, along with a few big waterskins, you’re off!

...and everyone collectively has a heart attack!

◇

When you show up in Ghandaraville essentially all “✨️💖☺️✨️” on Tighnari’s doorstep-

He chokes on the tea he’d been sipping on before he opened the door lol

He looks a little frazzled so you try to just gesture with “calm yourself small animal” energy with your hands

“Tivzgvhg Oliw! R'n- R- sld wrw blf-?! Mvevinrmw, xlnv rm, xlnv rm, ivhg! ...R mvvw gl hvmw z nroorlm ovggvih mld gl ylgs gsv vmgriv xrgb lu Hfnvif, gsv Zxgrmt Tizmw Hztv, zmw gsv Nzgiz nlhg orpvob…” he began out looking at you and talking and gesturing to his small dining table (the game sucks, his house looks great and has lots of cool rooms filled with interesting plants… oooo…so pretty...) 

But then he kinda just devolved into rambling, no need to understand, you can read the vibes and just know that's what he's doing lol

Collei eventually ducks in, and she looks a little panicked?

She’s quickly followed by Cyno, pushing past her to call out into the house,

His voice seems hard and stressed, looking at Tighnari, “Grtsmzir, szev blf hvvm gsv Tivzgvhg Oliw zmbdsviv, gsvb dviv hvvm xlnrmt gl Tszmwziezeroov ozhg-” 

Cyno stops and blinks.

Collei’s mouth is slightly dropped open, she also just, blinks.

You blink. 

Tighnari blinks tiredly, he looks like he’d rather be done for the day, you think.

The doctor sighs, and moves his head to nod towards the other dining seats.

◇

Sumeru foods are so much better looking in real life, and they’re so good too, your practically bloated by the end of dinner, 

As a thank you, bc u cant say it obv, you just gesture for Tighnari to stay sitting, and he gives you a raised eyebrow and a suspicious ear twitch

But stays still, and you reach out to finally hit the eight-pointed star hovering over his, and all playable characters chests at all times.

Like you suspected, it brings up a holographic character menu, but rather than his full model, it kind of hovers in front of Tighnari’s face, replacing his old 3D model self with framing the real thing for a portrait just in front of his face

The poor Denro user nearly jumps a foot out of his chair as he looks in shock at your screen, you do the same “chillll boy” gesture with your hands and press his shoulders for a second to remind him to not run off or panic

Cyno and Collei had done the dishes and put up leftovers, and are now standing behind Tighnari, watching with equally wide eyes,

“...Dszg ziv gsvb wlrmt gl blf?

Cyno’s voice is even deeper and quieter than usual, you feel goosebumps run up your spine

“Ziv blf tvggrmt yovhhvw, Nzhgvi Grtsmzir?!” Collei’s sweet voice is also hushed like she’s witnessing something sacred, Tighnari gently shakes his head negatively in response, his shoulders shrugging,

“Nzbyv? R uvvo... z orggov hgilmtvi, zmw nb Erhrlm rh zxgrmt fk zh dvoo…”

Though he’s replying, Tighnari’s eyes haven’t once left your ancient magic? technology device? hovering in front of him,

and as he crosses his arms and squints to try and look closer at everything floating in front of him, you can see the childlike gleam of awe in his green eyes, (so cute) in fact, now that you glance up and look, both Collei and Cyno have the same quietly excited and fascinated sparkle in their eyes too

With a displeased sneer, you chuck his old level one bow into the material grinding spots, hope he wasn’t attached to that…

Oh well, he’ll like the new one better, afterall, with no characters, all your best weapons and artifacts are ready to use!

With a small smile of reassurance, you finally finish gearing Tighnari up, tap a miniature version of that 8-point star in the corner like an “X” button, and it retreats like a classic TV set📺 turning off into his chest, he startles but then carefully stands

You decide to just start making decisions bc its worked out so far ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

And grab his hand and haul him out into the forest, Collei letting out a surprised squeak, her and Cyno hurrying after

You reach the nearest clearing, and gesture at Tighnari like a bow and arrow firing, he gets it, and your glad he already trusts you, because he doesn’t take long to summon his bow

He takes aim at a smaller tree about two cars length away

You can feel them all holding their breathe, as Tighnari charges it with Dendro, the arrowhead glowing, (it looks so cool and badass irl god you feel envious even tho ur already here-)

The ranger lets it fly, it streaks neon green, whistling through the air, it hits the tree-

and it fucking explodes.

Vines and leaves and the trees roots all rapidly swell like theyre filled with water, like it literally got hit by a superhero with plant powers, which, not that far off actually.

The green floating Dendro seeds make a ring around the tree its so full of elemental energy-

You give a wild grin, you still got it, hell yeah. >:)

Your grin widens as you look over at Tighnari, Collei, and Cyno

Cyno has a smirk lighting up his face, eyes eager, Collei’s jaw has dropped and she’s just frozen staring as the tree finally settles from the burst of the dendro powered arrow

…Tighnari has lowered his bow, and his mouth is only slightly open, his ears perked straight up into the air, shaking with excitement? Happiness? Interest? You don’t know how peopl-animal-hybrid ears work,

and you STILL cant talk to any of them to ask what they thought, so looks will have to do >:/

Tighnari is the first to move, his head snapping over to look at you, the brightest, kinda feral tbh, smile taking over his face-

“Blf pmld, dv xzm'g fmwvihgzmw blf, zmw blf fh, bvg R xzm'g dzrg gl hvv dszg rm gsv dliow blf'iv tlrmt gl wl mvcg. Blf'iv znzarmt."

… and you just 🙂? Cool!

And give a thumbs up👍LMAO

☆

Bonus:

Alhaitham was literally running around Sumeru City trying to find you when you left, tho you did try and leave a translatable-in-3-to-5-business days-note, he didn’t have time to translate that because you were gone.

Or worse, lost in the city, and he would never forgive himself if he lost you, esp as Acting Grand Sage-

Kaveh got a letter a day and a half later from Tighnari letting them know you were having a sleepover in Ghandarvaville lol

Kaveh also had to hunt down Alhaitham to give him said news, then force his roommate to go sit or lay down for the rest of the day to recover lmao

(Haitham honestly kinda freaked Kaveh out bc he’s never seen him that... desperate, it was like seeing a statue emote lol)

♡

ARE YOU KIDDING WE ALMOST HIT LIMIT AGAIN?!

Bro has anyone else had this problem???

I literally had to switch from PC to mobile and copy and paste it there to get all my shit in and tumblr not throw a hissy fit???!!!

FUCKING TUMBLR- SUCK MY BIG FAT- 👹👹 UGH

ANYWAYYYY SO I FINALLY CAVED 

And started doing ciphers for when you dont get teyvat’s language! I meant to do something fun like this for awhile but I wasn’t sure if that would be kind of annoying, but if you’re interested in learning what they actually say (which the whole point of this is that dw it doesnt rlly matter lol) here’s a hint:

*hint = Atbash

:> good luck!

Wish me luck on my art exhibition today!! Then I’ll be homefreeeee 😭

Safe Travels,

💀♒

♡ the beloveds ♡

@karmawonders / @0rah-s / @randomnatics / @glxssynarvi / @nexylaza / @genshin-impacts-me / @wholesomey-artist

#fucking tumblr #ok its official we got beef #welp .-. watch out if i ever need to post a fic or smth Ill just link my ao3 #on the masterpost pinned most likely #sorry btw this got AWAY from me 😭 #like idk? if i even?? answered ur question??? #genshin impact #genshin sagau #ask box open #sagau #my asks #genshin imagines #gender neutral reader #genshin isekai #genshin impact self aware #genshin impact sagau #genshin sagau language barrier au #genshin language barrier au #i should proobbaabbllyyy start tagging that huh #ugh i dont wanna go back to all my old asks/posts and tag it tho 😫 #cipher encoded #encoded #language cipher

[yingxtkm]

For the doodle requests maybe we could get sephy eating some pasta?

This man and his obsession with carbs LMAO he’s so real for that, also including a bonus cleaned doodle of him eating old microwaved Wutaian take out at 2am in the morning

#request box #doodle requests #answered asks #asks #he loves his noodles #if he wants pasta he’ll get pasta idc hojo fuck off #noodles #miniroth #sephiroth #ff7 #ffvii #final fantasy vii #my artwork #fanart #doodle

[wild-flowerhoney]

"i dont understand how you can ship-" you're no fun.

"they're the blueprint! canon! why would you-" you're boring. shush. go back to playing with your sad beige toys.

#im really tired #let anyone do as they please ffs #ship everything or nothing #it's fine #just dont butt in #pjo #hoo #bc yall need to hear this THE MOST #drove off 80% of the pjo fandom years ago by doing exactly this to the point of exasperation #percico #just #fucking everyone #but also #marauders #jegulus #starchaser #moonwater #moonseeker #isnt it fun how i cant tag the major ships bc i know 100% if i did id wake up to absolutely bs in my ask box

[ourtubahero-blog]

Just us when Neil answers our asks.

#this is neil gaiman’s fault #neilgaiman #neil gaiman #fuck you gaiman #good omens #good ineffable omens #ineffable husbands #Neil Gaiman’s ask box #gay tumblr #michael sheen #david tennant #sandman #the sandman #coraline #ineffable dumbasses #welsh seduction machine #soft scottish hipster gigolo #wait and see

[ireallyymissu]

guess who broke their gaming chair playing overwatch >.<

but here’s a few cute selfies ✨

<3

#fuck overwatch lol #come play overwatch with me #cute girl #cat beanie #beanie #cozy #my cozy blog <3 #selfie #me #ask box open #let’s be friends <3 #ask me anything #<3 #askbox #yearning #stoner #i hate my smile lol #donate if you can #pleease #wishlist

[pinetreevillain]

Tim teaching italian swear gestures to Donnie and regretting it almost immediately (I hope this is ok, love your work so much. I want to study your style under a microscope fr)

TIMOTHY WOULD NOT TEACH HIM THAT. HE KNOWS NOT TO EQUIP DONATELLO WITH DANGEROUS TOOLS UNLESS HE IS PREPARED TO DEAL WITH THE CONSEQUENCES.

#pastawayallday #gifts for me #DONNIE LOOKS SO DEVIOUS #HE KNOWS HOW TO SAY FUCK #ask box

[severedegg]

the sillies ever <33

#my art #wh #welcome home #wally darling #howdy pillar #eddie dear #barnaby b beagle #mewmew <3333 #i love welcome home #im annoyed though cause im tryna balance drawing fanart and doing this really fucking detailed commission that im torturing myself with #welcome home fanart #also dont ask why 5000 apples its for comedic effect lmao #i imagine they take them all to poppy n they help bake them into things and experiment lol #her getting all frazzled that theres so many boxes of apples outside her door tehe <3

[genderqueerpositivity]

People are allowed to decide who they can and cannot give their services to, you fucking freak (coming FROM a gay person) you are all so unbelievably PATHETIC for acting like wedding designers refusing to do shit for us becos of our sexuality is some massive hit to lgbt rights. You all don’t seem to understand we had it much worse, and that this bill is allowing people behavioural freedom. We should be grateful for it, it’s not right to force people to do things they don’t want to with their own businesses.

It's not an object to me, because I would never deliberately hire a Christian to design anything if my queer heathen ass were getting married.

And that isn't the point, because what I know is this: legally this is purely another step towards removing nondiscrimination protections entirely.

Do you really think that they're going to stop at websites and wedding cakes?

It's about removing legal protections against discrimination in all areas for the entire LGBTQ+ community. This court case was never about a wedding website, the designer in question was never hired to design a website for a gay couple--this case was entirely about attacking and weaking a nondiscrimination law.

I hope you get your wish.

And when your Christian landlord evicts you, when you are fired from your job for posting a wedding picture of yourself and your partner on social media, when your children are denied opportunities for having same gender married parents, when your family is refused service in restaurants, when doctors refuse to treat you, when the pharmacy refuses to fill your prescriptions, and when the EMTs let you die on the street because saving your gay ass is an affront to Jesus...

I hope you remember to feel grateful.

#ask box #the internalized homophobia is strong in this one #it wasnt a bill it was a court case you fucking clown #scotus #nondiscrimination laws #lgbtq #lgbtqia #queer

[lotus-pear]

Chuuvia besties clorinzai worsties

so true tumblr user evilkaeya sry for the infinitely late response i had to draw their first meeting in my head

dazai would make sure to be on his best behavior around chlorinde bc she could fold his ass in a second

#edit: NO OMFG I DONT SHIP THEM THEYRE BOTH GAY FOR FUCKS SAKE.. THIS IS A JOKE (anons in the ask box need to take a joke fr) #yk actually. part 2 where she just kicks him in the ribs with her nine inch stillettos puncturing his stomach #chuuvia sipping tea in the corner completely ignoring their unhinged partners #genshin imapct #bsd #lotus’s asks #lotus draws

[dragoncarrion]

quick dinobot. not sure what direction i wanted to take this in. Anyway i ljke him ❤️

#Maccadam #Beast wars #ask box #Dinobot #bw dinobot #Transformers #Tf #Tfbw #My art #Made this in like 2 hours was going to go for a completely different style but I liked the sketch too much 😭 #I need to let go of that damn sketch I'm always on that damn sketch. GRRRRR #Also you can tell I had no fucking idea what to do for the BG #I knew I wanted it to be dark pink but it was too plain. Ahhh

[the-kipsabian]

i stole this from twitter shhhh they dont need to know

#original said 'reply with' but i dont want replies we're doing an ask box thing cause thats what this site is about!! #this might pour unpopular opinions out of me tbh but fuck it. i'll try to be gentle unless its someone i really dont like lmao #anyways free to reblog too idc #ask game #wrestling #anyways im gonna play animal crossing so feel free to send something while im gone

[sonicattos]

shadow + uncut amethyst for the palette thing :3?

this one seemed like the easiest because i’m the ourple expert.

(no i didn’t use more colors outside of the palette, the colors were made by mixing them together)

#ask box #shadow the hedgehog #sth #sth fanart #color theory my beloved #oh this isn’t the only one i’m doing btw i just meant as the first one #ALSO FUCKED UP THE LEGS IM SLEEBY SORRY #saltcat art

[feral-ballad]

I don't think it's because they support or do not support that they're unfollowing. I honestly think they're like myself who is absolutely EXHAUSTED seeing bad news after bad news in this stupid world and being FORCED to have an opinion on something we cannot control. Just something to think about before getting hostile or feeling superior.

i don’t know why you think condemning someone’s silence to a genocide is “getting hostile or feeling superior” but sure. i guess i can’t get hostile when there’s people dying. so sorry you’re forced to have an opinion, must be very tiring.

#the fucking audacity i swear #if i see one more stupid ask like this in my ask box i’m gonna lose it #where’s the superiority in acknowledging people’s suffering? #from the river to the sea palestine will be free #gaza #free palestine #🇵🇸 #ethnic cleansing #genocide

[inoreuct]

sleepy zosan cuddles please? maybe sanji crashing zoro’s catnap 🤭

this was IMMENSELY fun to write. i couldn’t resist adding in a flipped scenario with zoro crashing sanji’s bed,,, enjoy 😽

Sanji poked his head into the men’s quarters, biting his lip against a smirk. The night was still young; Nami and Usopp were outside, ensnared in some inane drinking game while Luffy egged them on. He, however, had much better things to do with his free time. 

Such as bothering the one man currently asleep on the ship.

The wind whistled before he shut the door. It was going to get chilly, which was why he’d had the foresight to be here; Zoro put out heat like a bloody furnace.

The swordsman was belly-down on his bunk, arms splayed out, his broad back rising and falling in time with his breaths. Sanji was really banking on Zoro subconsciously recognising him here in order to not get run through with a katana, but better safe than sorry, he supposed.

He crept across the room in the soft lamplight, planted his feet, and announced “Marimo!” like he was summoning the man— before jumping and face-planting between Zoro’s shoulder blades. 

Evidently he’d been expected, because the swordsman didn’t so much as startle even as the bunk swayed under their combined weight. “What,” he deadpanned, sighing into his pillow. 

Sanji could feel it under his cheek, hear the soft whoosh of breath out of Zoro’s lungs. “It’s winding up to be a chilly night,” he sing-songed, stacking his hands to prop his chin on top. 

“You’re so fucking annoying,” Zoro groaned irritably, scrubbing both hands over the back of his head and clearly grouchy at being woken. up. 

Sleeping constantly, horrible sense of direction, grumpy all the time— “God, chéri, you’re such an old man,” Sanji complained, absentmindedly tracing patterns into Zoro’s shirt and watching the loose linen gather and twist beneath his finger. “And for someone with so much muscle, you’re not a very comfortable pil— Hey!”

“Up,” Zoro grumbled, uncoordinated and sleep-heavy as he pushed himself up and toppled Sanji off to the side.

“What’re you— Have of my efforts in trying to make you a gentleman been absolutely—” The cook squeaked as he was grabbed, muscled arms tight around his chest and waist as Zoro picked him up and rolled them over.

“Y’talk too damn much,” he muttered, the words pressed into Sanji’s hair as he adjusted, thumb rubbing up and down Sanji’s upper arm over his sleep shirt.

The motion was repetitive. Soothing. Sanji went quiet as bony ankles tangled with his; with his back pressed to Zoro’s chest, he could feel every breath the swordsman took, deep and ever-steady. Every single beat of his heart, clear against Sanji’s shoulder blades. 

The cook slid a hand over the one around his waist like he always did and laced their fingers. He’d lied about Zoro not being a comfortable bedmate; Sanji never slept better than when he was with him, and on top of that— If there was one thing better than a comfortable bedmate, it was a comfortable boyfriend. 

He had the vague awareness of a kiss being pressed to his crown before his eyes fluttered shut, sinking boneless into the thin mattress with a contented hum. Zoro didn’t sleep with a blanket, but honestly? 

Sanji never really minded.

*

His bunk creaked, dipping under the weight of a new person, and Sanji jerked awake with a soft “wha?”

“S’just me,” Zoro muttered, sliding into the blankets behind him and kicking them away after a split second of consideration, pressing the line of his body to Sanji’s back. “It’s too fuckin’ hot.” 

“You’re sticky,” Sanji whined, awake enough to protest against the feeling of damp skin and swat half-heartedly at the arm winding around his waist.

“Because I just took a shower, idiot,” Zoro hissed, which, ah. Explained why he was shirtless. 

“It’s too hot. Which is why you’re choosing to share a bed. And body heat. Okay,” Sanji yawned, his sleep-addled brain mollified as he settled back in, and Zoro huffed through his nose.

“You’re cold, it’s nice.”

“Hm.” The cook peered blearily over his shoulder before rolling over, tossing a leg over Zoro’s hip and shoving his head beneath his chin. “That’s the only reason you’re in my bed, huh?”

“Go to sleep, cook,” Zoro grumbled, something wry in his tone, “before I give you a reason to stay up.”

Sanji kicked him in the shin and fought down a sleepy grin. “Not so loud, they’ll hear you!”

“I’ve been awake this whole time, guys.” Usopp’s voice came floating from the darkness somewhere to the right, sounding a little traumatised, and Sanji sank his teeth into Zoro’s shoulder to stop himself from laughing out loud.

“Sorry, buddy,” he stage-whispered, still trying to control his residual chuckles. He could tell Zoro was laughing quietly from the rumbling beneath his cheek.

“S’fine. Just no funny business or I’ll get Nami… to…”

Their crewmate started snoring, and Sanji squinted up at Zoro’s face in the darkness. “Get Nami to what?”

“Can’t be anything good when that witch is involved,” Zoro sighed, shifting his arm up onto the pillow so Sanji could rest his head on his bicep. “Night, cook.”

“G’night. Don’t blame me when your arm falls asleep,” Sanji murmured, snuggling in with a shiver.

“Shut up.”

“Mhm. Love you.”

“…Yeah, whatever.”

“Marimo. You have to say it back.”

“Yes, okay, I love you, now please go to sleep.”

Sanji scoffed quietly. “You’re the one who woke me up.”

Zoro craned his neck to glare down at him. “I swear I will fuck off back to my own bunk.”

“…”

“Yeah, that’s what I thought.”

“Pissy asshole,” Sanji muttered into his shoulder, small enough that Zoro didn’t hear.

He fell asleep with a smile on his face anyway.

fin.

#zosan #op zosan #zosan fanfic #one piece zosan #zoro x sanji #they’re so fucking stupid #somebody please go save usopp #luffy’s out cold like the dead in the corner he’s doing peachy #but poor usopp is NOT #one piece sanji #one piece zoro #one piece #ask box #ino’s ask box