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copperbadge · 2 years

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Hi Sam! I saw a post mentioning that Russia might disconnect from the global web and we'll lose LJ. I was wondering if you know of any backups of the old Dungeons journals/community? It's been one of my comfort fics for a while and I'm sad about the possibility of losing it.

Man, I can't imagine what it must be like to be in Russia or Ukraine right now. Just the surreality of the clash between normal life and this terrifying totalitarianism descending. Incredibly scary and my heart goes out to the people of both countries. I feel like in the sudden scare of "we might lose LJ" it's important to remember that there are people who are losing a lot more, before I step into this discussion.

I've seen a lot of posts about methodologies for getting stuff off LJ. Not to be an asshole about it, but the best way to do this would be to have been doing it for the last five years. I know that's not helpful, I just want to remind folks that if you love something online, or if you use it as a resource, save it now. Do not wait for emergencies. If you own it, export it to a more stable platform; if you don't, archive it. If you start saving what you love now, while it's not in danger, you can do it in small chunks. It's a lot, I know, but it's a lot that is absolutely a lot MORE when you have a deadline.

(Related to this, would anyone be interested in me running a National Clean Your Home month style event but for digital? National Save Your Shit month, or "Nasa Yoshi", could be done, but it'd have to wait until at least April because I am on my last spoon just now.)

I just googled and it looks like we archived a LOT of the RP on Insanejournal, so there is a backup of Dungeons (which may or may not be complete, I honestly don't recall) here. (Dungeons, for reference, is a Harry Potter RP I was in ages ago. I think much of it might be archived at Dreamwidth too, you might check our usernames there as well).

One last caveat -- if you are archiving something that doesn't belong to you, lock that up. You don't know what the author's wishes are, and you don't want to get accused of plagiarism, so if you've got a fic or a site or a page that you want to save, save it privately.

Ok here we go.

1. Import from LJ to Dreamwidth. Apparently the queue for that is very long right now because it's a popular choice. It's what I did when I migrated to DW as my primary platform and it works very well, but also you have to be the owner of the LJ -- you have to give DW the username and password so it can access the LJ account. Not useful for you since you want to save off Dungeons content, which presumably you don't have passwords for. Also if you are going to be using Dreamwidth, throw them some money if you at all can, they were not prepared for this level of traffic.

ETA per @fraterrisus, thank you: “I love Dreamwidth, but before people go running there to save their LJs, keep in mind that not only is DW under really heavy load right now, they've been having a bunch of problems with LJ blocking their importer code, so there's no guarantee it will even work. Check out @dreamwidth on Twitter or read the staff's posts about this on DW for more info.”

2. There are probably programs, or will be soon, that can crawl through a livejournal and save everything off to your hard drive. These used to exist but because I moved off LJ so long ago I don't have any references for where they are, and they tend to be somewhat complicated to use if you're not familiar with programming languages, plus it's hard to know who to trust when half of Github is very earnestly trying to help and the other half is malware. If you'd like to try and find a program that will download an LJ that you don't own, I'd keep an eye on the Livejournal tag on tumblr. Readers, feel free to drop links into comments or reblogs; readers, also be very wary of what links you follow.

ETA thank you @hinerdsitscat for the reminder, this is possibly shady as fuck, but https://www.blogbooker.com/ is what we used to use years ago after strikethrough and similar. I can’t promise it is safe or effective but it used to work great.

3. Save off what you love manually. You can go to any LJ page, expand all the comments you want to save, right click and save-as. Your browser should save the entire page as an html file and a folder on your hard drive; the HTML stores the text, the folder stores the images. I don't believe it saves collapsed comments, so make sure any comments you want to save are expanded.

4. I'm sure there are other options I'm missing but I can't think of any so readers, feel free to drop other options in comments. In the meantime let's go to my option of choice: Evernote, or a similar program. Evernote is a cloud-based notebook, like OneNote if you use Microsoft suite, or like Googledocs if Googledocs allowed you to save web content without copy-paste.

Evernote has a webclipper widget that installs on your browser. Go to any page you want to save, click the elephant head webclipper button, and it will save a copy, like a googledoc, to your Evernote account. Only want to save part of the page? Highlight the part, click the elephant head, and choose "save selection". You can add tags and summaries when you clip, or you can do it later. Evernote can even be trained to intuitively tag stuff (like if you've saved off 30 fics tagged Steve/Tony, and you save a 31st, it will suggest "steve/tony" as a tag since you tagged similar documents that in the past).

Evernote has an app which is limited to two devices per username, but you don't have to use the app; you can just use the website to access the documents you have saved. The upside of the app is that it will save a backup of your cloud archive to your computer (the app is also mandatory for accessing evernote on your phone, but if you can avoid doing all this on your phone you absolutely should, what a nightmare). I did a tutorial about evernote years ago; I'm not sure it would be helpful at this point, since it's undergone a lot of changes since then, but it's relatively intuitive to use.

Evernote is not the most efficient way to save off an entire archive, but if there's stuff you especially love and worry about losing, it's probably one of the easier options. Get in, get that stuff, and concern yourself with the rest later. It can save art as well as text, and it's fully searchable. I have basically built myself a second, private AO3 of just the stories I enjoy using Evernote, and I also keep informative tumblr posts and fanart there.

Also, if stuff has gone missing, try entering the url into archive.org's wayback machine and accessing it that way. In addition, if you know the title, username, or a unique phrase from the fic or page, try googling it in quotes; a lot of people have migrated stuff all over.

Good luck, guys.

#livejournal #fandom #fan history

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storiesforallfandoms · 3 years

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he’ll never see this ~ noen eubanks

word count: 1994

request?: yes!

“Hi can you do one imagine of Noen Eubanks, like, the reader is a tik toker or influencer something like that and they have a crush on each other,and they Fans are Shipping them.

Thanksss💖🖤💖🖤💖”

description: in which she admits her feelings for a fellow creator during a stream thinking he’ll never see it

pairing: noen eubanks x female!reader

warnings: swearing

masterlist (one, two)

The sound of a new donation message coming in pulled you away from your game for a split second. The automated voice read the message out to you: “are there any influencers that you are totally crushing on right now?”

You chuckle to yourself as you turn back to your game. “You guys really wanna start something, huh? You realize this will be trending within an hour if I say anything.”

You glanced over at your chat to see they were begging you to tell them who your influencer crush was. You had mentioned a few times that there was a fellow influencer that you had a crush on, but you refused to admit who it was (for obvious reasons). Your viewers, however, were determined to find out who this mystery man you liked was.

“We promise we’ll keep it a secret,” you read, managing to catch one message before it disappeared into the void of never ending messages. “I don’t believe you guys at all.”

You laughed as you watched the chat blow up again. You finally paused your game and made your face cam bigger for the audience. “Okay, you know what? Fuck it, there’s no way he’ll ever see this and I’m not big enough of a content creator to have articles written about me. My influencer crush is Noen Eubanks. If you don’t know who he is, look him up on TikTok and you’ll totally understand why I have such a crush on him.”

Your chat went absolutely wild at this. You went back to playing your game, smiling to yourself as you did so. It felt nice to get that off of your chest, and you knew you were about to get a kick out of your fan’s reactions to this.

Like you said, you had no fear of Noen actually finding out what you said. You had a bit of a following, but it was nothing too big. Just enough that you could be classified as “Internet famous”, but not enough that admitting you had a crush on someone else who had a much bigger following than you would be a big deal.

Or so you thought.

After your stream, you decided to go right to bed. You were feeling tired and had to get up early to edit the video you were planning on uploading. You weren’t awake to witness the internet absolutely explode over your comment, but lucky for you it was still happening when you woke up the next morning.

When you checked your phone for the first time that day, you noticed that your notifications had blown up over night. You figured it was just your fans teasing you over your crush on Noen, which it partly was, but you noticed that it was also YouTube news Twitter accounts and internet tabloid accounts tagging you in their articles about your crush on Noen.

“Oh no,” you said, your eyes widening as you read through article after article, tweet after tweet.

Before you knew it, you had spent nearly two hours sat on the floor, reading through everything that mentioned both you and Noen. All the articles were the same: an brief introduction to you and your small Twitch/YouTube following, talking about you admitting to having a crush on Noen the night before, and asking whether the reading audience believed that you and Noen would make a good couple or not.

The reactions from fans were as entertaining as you figured - with many of your fans trying to come up with ship names for you and Noen and tagging him in clips from your stream - but then there were the less than entertaining reactions. Many people, whether they were Noen’s fans or just people who wanted to hate on you you weren’t sure, were saying you had mentioned Noen’s name just for clout, or that your “crush” was nothing more than an infatuation over his looks.

It wasn’t until your phone rang that you were finally pulled out of your trance and back to the real world. Your friend’s name lit up on your screen, and it took you a moment to collect yourself before you answered.

“(Y/N), have you been online yet today?” she asked.

You sighed and nodded, then remembered she couldn’t actually see you. “Yeah, I’ve been scrolling for the past two hours on Twitter.”

“You haven’t checked your Twitch page, or YouTube account yet?”

Your eyebrows furrowed together in confusion. “No? Should I?”

“You definitely should.”

You put her on speaker and switched to your Twitch app. You were shocked to see that you had skyrocketed in subs overnight, same with your YouTube page. You had gained a solid ten thousand subscribers on both platforms, and it was still rising by the second.

“So this situation has gained me more subscribers, who cares? That’s not why I talked about Noen on stream,” you said.

“Oh no, honey. It isn’t just the situation that has given you new subscribers. Go check Noen’s Twitter.”

You knew what she was implying, but you had to see it for your own eyes. You immediately opened the Twitter app again and typed in Noen’s name. You were brought to his Twitter page, where his most recent tweet was a link to the clip from your stream along with a caption that read, “When your internet crush calls you *their* internet crush”.

You covered your mouth in shock. You were sure you were about to start screaming, but you were so speechless that you couldn’t force any sounds from your mouth.

“I’m assuming by the silence that you’ve seen it,” your friend said after a prolonged moment of silence.

“D-Did he just c-call me his...?” you trailed off, unable to finish your sentence.

“He did,” your friend confirmed. “And both of your fans are going wild. They’ve already come up with a ship name for you, which isn’t the most clever name but I admire their spirit.”

You could barley hear what your friend was saying. You were still staring at the tweet in disbelief. Your mind could barley comprehend anything else besides the fact that your online crush thought the same as you. You were trying to tell yourself not to get too worked up, as it was most likely that nothing was going to come from this besides some gossip for a week or more, but your heart was still racing with excitement.

You gasped as a notification popped up on the top of your screen: “@/eubanks_noen is requesting to message you”.

“He’s trying to DM me,” you whisper, so silently that you could barley hear yourself.”

“What?”

“He’s trying to DM me! On Twitter!”

“What are you doing talking to me?! Go answer his DM!”

You were too focused to laugh as you hung up the phone and went into your DMs. The familiar profile picture that you saw almost every day on your timeline was the first thing you saw in your message requests. Your whole body was shaking so much that you could barley see the screen as you pressed to open it.

“hi :)”

It was a very simple message, but it was enough to make your heart race even more.

You were debating on messaging back, wondering if maybe this was a fake account or something. But you knew there was only one way to find out for sure, so you took a deep breath and responded.

“hi! :)”

His response came near seconds later: “so...we’re the internet’s hottest power couple, huh?”

You chuckled to yourself. “i guess we are. sorry if i ruined your mentions last night. i didn’t think it would blow up the way it has. i’m not all that famous online.”

“are you kidding me? you’re like one of the best twitch streamers. i’ve watched every single one of your streams, including last night’s”

You felt your face heating up, but a slight groan of embarrassment came from your lips. You were thinking of all the embarrassing things you had said and done on stream, and now wished you could just melt into the floor or erase the entire internet.

“oh that’s embarrassing. i’d say i’m not that awkward and dumb in real life, but i’m actually more so”

“i wouldn’t say you’re awkward or dumb at all. i think you’re adorable”

“Oh my God!” you exclaimed to no one in particular. If your face got any hotter, it would be on fire.

“you really know how to talk to a girl”

“i really don’t, but i’m glad you’re enjoying my attempts to flirt”

“so you’re flirting? never would’ve known”

“i know, it’s hard to tell. i’m trying to be subtle”

You continued to message Noen for a while. It felt so natural, as if you weren’t talking to someone you had been crushing on for about a year now. You were extremely glad you weren’t coming off as awkward as you normally felt.

Finally, after having been sat on the floor for a good three hours, your back began to ache and your stomach was growling so loudly in attempts to get your attention. You realized then that you had put getting breakfast on hold in order to fall deep into the hole of internet gossip that had surrounded you overnight.

“love talking to you and all, but i’m gonna have to go for a little bit. i’ve been sat on the floor basically since i woke up and i haven’t eaten yet today so my stomach is very upset with me”

“why are you on the floor? 😂”

“when i’m stressed i tend to sit down no matter where i am, and i was very stressed to see my name plastered all over social media this morning”

“why were you stressed over that?”

“it’s not something i’m exactly used to. like i said, i’m not overly famous online. i just have a small following. i’m not someone who has an article written about every little thing she says. also like i said, i didn’t expect you to see me admit that i have a crush on you last night, so i was so worried about what your reaction was going to be”

“i guess i can understand that. i haven’t had a lot written about me. i’m not a big tiktoker like some of my friends are, but i guess that’s a blessing”

You started to type another message, but paused when you saw the three dots from Noen indicating that he was typing something else.

“for what it’s worth, i’ve had a internet crush on you since you first started streaming”

Your jaw dropped at this. You had started streaming months before you even knew about Noen, which meant he had known about you before you knew about him. Just when you thought this day couldn’t get any better.

“wow! that’s quite a while. you must be one of my first subscribers then”

“i’m up there i think. i’ll wear that badge with pride”

The three dots again. You waited anxiously to see what he was about to say.

“i liked getting to talk to you today, though. maybe we could talk offline sometime, like through text or phone call. maybe meet in person eventually”

Your smile was so wide that it hurt your cheeks. “yeah, i’d really like that”

You exchanged phone numbers and added his to your contacts. You finally pulled yourself off the floor and started making a super late breakfast while also starting to edit your next video since you had also gotten such a late start on that.

You were putting your food on a plate when your phone chimed, indicating a new text message.

“btw, it’s nice to finally get to meet you internet crush :)”

“it’s nice to get to meet you, too, internet crush”

You sat at the table, your heart feeling warm. And to think, it all came true thanks to one nosy donation.

Not sure how much I like this imagine, but I hope you enjoyed anyways!

#noen eubanks #noen eubanks imagine #noen eubanks x reader #imagine #one shot #request #tiktok #fanfiction #fanfic #fandom

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blouisparadise · 3 years

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Here are some amazing bottom Louis fics that were posted or completed during the month of October. We hope you enjoy this list. Happy reading!

1) You Control Me (Even If Its Just Tonight) | Explicit | 1591 words

Louis rides Harry and thinks he's in control.

2) Save a Horse | Explicit | 2400 words

Louis goes to a rodeo with Liam, and gets a lot more than he bargained for. Featuring bull rider Harry, obnoxious t-shirts, and one hell of a night.

3) El Comienzo De Una Vida | Teen & Up | 2779 words

Note: There is no smut in this fic, but it contains omega Louis, so we’ve included it in this monthly roundup. This fic is the second part of a series.

After being bartered to Harry to save his kingdom, Louis is on his way to the Alpha's homeland and he would very much like him to stop being so cautious and just kiss him, god damn it!

4) A Treat For You And A Treat For Me | Explicit | 3416 words

Louis blushed at Harry’s flirty tone. “You’re just saying that to get in my pants.” He giggled, half joking. “But thank you. I’m glad you like it.”

“Not just to get in your pants, baby. I’m being honest. You’re always cute. Are you wearing mascara?” He asked, licking over his lips. Louis in makeup always did something to Harry. He loved it.

Louis nodded, leaning forward. “I am. Do you like it? I’m also wearing some cute Halloween panties under my costume.. if you wanna see them later?” He murmured, letting his lips touch Harry’s lightly before pulling away, a tiny smile on his lips.

Harry’s mouth opened a bit, but no words came out. Instead Louis was lifted up and carried in Harry’s arms, up the stairs. “Later? I wanna see them now.” He whispered into Louis’ ear, hot breath sending shivers down Louis’ body. “Missed you so much since last time.”

5) A Kiss For Then, A Kiss For Now (And A Million More) | Mature | 6073 words

Note: There is no smut in this fic, but it contains omega Louis, so we’ve included it in this monthly roundup. This is the sequel to this fic.

A collection of moments from Petal's life with her mummy, the stinky alpha and their new baby boy.

6) Terror At Our Door | Explicit | 6201 words

A hurt man comes to Harry's home on Halloween, bringing in a world of mystery that Styles didn't want at all.

What a shame that feelings are involved too.

7) Fight Me Breathless | Mature | 7596 words

Louis Tomlinson has no idea why he’s in a London hospital for asthma, but enter Harry Styles, his doctor, who he definitely doesn’t think is hot, and he’s left wondering if asthma is why he can’t seem to breathe properly with his doctor around.

8) This Ain't Red Wine | Explicit | 9054 words

It’s not until he gets a whiff of the contents of his glass that Louis realizes his grave mistake.

That’s not red wine.

It’s blood.

It’s probably not the most rational, but his first thought is what people are going to think when they discover his body. On the list of stupidest ways for a human to die, accidentally turning up to a Vampire party has to be pretty high up there.

9) Colder Weather | Explicit | 15132 words

Note: Please remember to check tags for any trigger warnings.

Louis doesn’t know what comes over him. “Please H-Harry, take me,” Louis looks back at the farmhouse, swallowing once as his skittish eyes fall onto the master bedroom window, “Take me with you, please.”

Harry’s scent flares, the tinged anger so noticeable that Louis draws back out of the alpha’s space.

“Is he hittin’ on you?”

Louis’ right hand rests briefly against the bruise forming rapidly over the right side of his rib cage, the darkness of the night hiding the movement. “No.”

10) Those Who From The Pit Of Hell, Roam To Seek Their Prey On Earth | Explicit | 17636 words

1889. Louis Tomlinson is a student at the prestigious Harrow School for Boys, nurturing his passion for forensic medicine under the care of a particularly mysterious and dark teacher, Harry Styles, who has set his main focus on a series of gruesome murders, all of them reflecting the year 1888, when Jack the Ripper went rampant in the poor streets of Whitechapel.

11) The Shining Distraction That Makes Me Fly Home | General Audiances | 19397 words

Note: There is no smut in this fic, but it contains omega Louis, so we’ve included it in this monthly roundup.

An omega Louis and an alpha Harry find themselves in a forced marriage that gives Louis the freedom he desires in exchange for Harry being chained up a bit more.

12) Welcome to The Rivalry | Mature | 19671 words

“Welcome home!” Niall yelled, clapping his hands in excitement. “Isn’t it great?”

Louis looked between Niall and the house, unsure how to respond.

“I don’t understand,” Louis finally managed to say. “Aren’t we a little old to be living so close to campus?”

Niall scoffed. “You’re only twenty-four for fuck’s sake. There is still plenty of partying left for us to do. What better place than one street over from where a car was set on fire after the Michigan game last year?”

“Is there proof of that? Did the car have Michigan plates or something? Is there a photo I can send in a DM to Wolfie?”

As if on cue, a Twitter notification popped up on Louis’ Apple watch. He had tweeted again.

13) Welcome to the Bottom of the World | Not Rated | 20859 words

Louis is an American musher/expedition guide, Harry is a scientist from England. They meet in the middle of Antarctica, what could go wrong?

14) Reach The Heavens Own Blue | Explicit | 21070 words

He steps up to the plate, eyes glazing over as he watches Harry chew sunflower seeds, his jaw moving obnoxiously and exaggeratedly. His eyes drag down Harry’s body, settling on his large bulge, accentuated in those sinful pinstripe pants. The lines cut across it just right, curving where he’s thickest. Louis wants to crawl across the dirt on his knees and just take what Harry gives him.

Louis shuts his eyes for a moment, opening them to find Harry staring at him with a smug expression. He fucking knows. Louis gets into position and waits for the pitch. He swings when Harry throws, missing the ball just barely. Strike one.

15) Terror Of Surrender | Explicit | 31566 words

Harry instructs them to step into Crescent Lunge, stopping when he gets to Louis to adjust his hips. “I think you can bend a little more.” He helps Louis deepen the stretch, his hands tight on his hips. “Good boy.”

Louis gasps quietly, his eyes snapping to Harry’s, his heart pounding in his chest. Harry’s eyes drop to his lips, his hands smoothing down Louis’ stretched thighs, then he’s turning and walking to the front of the class.

16) Eyes Off You | Explicit | 39396 words

A Charlie’s Angels inspired fic where Louis is the brains, Harry is the charm, Liam is the muscle, and Niall drives the getaway car - and Zayn is there, too. sometimes.

17) Puncture | Mature | 43383 words

Note; This fic has mentions of BH.

An alternate universe where Harry bites Louis and hates the taste of his blood but is still obsessed with him anyway.

18) Your Touch Shouldn't Make Me Feel Like This | Explicit | 48883 words

Uni AU in which Alpha Harry has been in love with his omega friend for the longest time and one motorbike trip to the countryside with Louis made him realize that he could no longer hold back his feelings.

19) Just A Flicker In The Dark | Explicit | 57191 words

Harry Styles is his case partner. High and mighty, annoyingly smug Harry Styles who’s known him for years and has fucking seen him naked for fuck’s sake.

He glances at Venus who’s blinking up at him with curious eyes, no doubt sensing the agitation sparking in his magic.

“This is not happening,” Louis says loudly. “This is not fucking happening. I am going to kill Liam, oh my god.” He doesn’t even know if Liam is responsible for this but it feels like something he’d do to drive Louis absolutely insane - exes don’t just show up to your assigned haunted house out of nowhere. “Fucking fuck!”

He nearly jumps when Harry knocks again, his muffled voice carrying through the wood. “I can hear you, you know,” he drawls, sounding frustratingly amused.

Louis exhales, resisting the urge to scream.

20) Wild Thing | Mature | 65962 words

Harry doesn’t think love is for him, until Louis shows him just how wild love is.

21) Three Days in February | Explicit | 187642 words

Louis is cursed after a night out with the lads and the five have just three days to figure out what happened and how to break it before Harry and Louis both lose their sanity and maybe something more. Louis can hear everything Harry thinks and Harry isn’t sure he can keep his feelings for Louis a secret from his own mind.

Check out our other fic rec lists by category here and by title here.

You can find other monthly roundup fic rec lists here.

#bottom louis #top harry #blp fic recs #monthly fic recs #fic recs #blp #larry

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florrickandassociates · 3 years

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TGF Thoughts: 5x04- And the clerk had a firm...

You can tell I’m enjoying this season when episodes air on Thursdays and I’ve written a recap by Friday night. More under the cut, as always.

I woke up very early on Thursday morning and couldn’t get back to sleep, so I decided to just watch this episode on my phone (I write these on rewatch). I’m sure the show was hoping that the upside-down clips of fake!Love Island would be disorienting, but wow, did this work on me. Between the lack of sleep and how plausible it would’ve been for me to accidentally have my phone upside-down with rotation lock on... I truly thought it was an ad for Love Island and also had to pause the episode to check my phone settings. Good job, show!

It turns out, however, that Carmen is doing a headstand and watching reality TV on her laptop. Very happy to see Carmen at home. It would be easy for the show to have her just be a mysterious presence at the firm, so even seeing her do perfectly normal things is a good reminder that she is a whole person and not just Associate Who Will Defend Anyone.

(I wouldn’t have expected Carmen to enjoy reality tv, but then again, I love Big Brother so...)

Carmen lives in a studio that doesn’t look like it is brand new!!! I’m ridiculously excited to see an apartment that actually looks like a place someone fresh out of law school might live. I’d believe it if Carmen lived in a studio in a luxury building or a one-bed on the salary she’s surely making at RL, but it’s very refreshing to see a character who isn’t super-wealthy on this show that tends to be about, well, very wealthy people.

Carmen is smarter than every other character on this show and on most TV shows: instead of opening the door without taking any precautions, she puts the chain on first. Remember how people used to just show up at Alicia’s door when she was the governor’s wife, and she’d always just open the door and look surprised?

Charles Lester is at Carmen’s door even though it’s nearly midnight. She tries to get him to leave, but he insists on staying. She closes the door to undo the chain, and uses the privacy of the closed door to grab a makeshift weapon, just in case.

Carmen explains her apartment by saying, “student loans.” So she doesn’t come from (excessive) money. (Or she was cut off by her family, but I feel like the early character description of Carmen said something about her family not having money.)

Lester has something very important to tell Carmen, but all his notes are on different scraps of paper and, even though he says his information is time sensitive, he takes his time looking for the right piece of paper.

He says Carmen can’t say she heard the info from him, blah blah. He’s there to share that in ten minutes, someone at the firm is going to be searched by the FBI. This info comes, of course, from Rivi.

Do we think Lester has to reference his notes to remember that the FBI is searching a name partner of Carmen’s firm? Or do we think he’s fucking with her? I think the latter.

Carmen was doing exercises to help with migraines, btw.

Carmen calls Diane to tip her off. Diane and Kurt are already asleep, but luckily, Diane has her phone on full volume and takes the call. She’s not happy about it and asks if it can wait until tomorrow. Asks is the wrong word—she instructs the caller to hang up if it can wait.

Even though Carmen can’t say where she got the information, Diane knows it must be from Rivi. Seems obvious enough.

Kurt gets out of bed and starts locking up guns and getting to work; Diane calls Liz. Liz is in bed with a guy we’ve never seen before and she does not really want to talk.

Liz notes that the info also could’ve come from Wolfe-Coleman, since Carmen is “tangled up with some rough characters.”

I’m sorry, fake Netflix CEO man... WHY ARE YOU STILL TRYING TO KISS AND PLAY WITH LIZ WHEN SHE IS ON THE PHONE TALKING ABOUT PURGING FILES AND THE FBI????

I don’t even hold this against the character. This is one of those things the writers of this show LOVE doing to heighten tension. They think people behave like this in real life and that it’s funny to have a million competing priorities at once, so they insist on doing things like this. In reality, I would be concerned about any person who did not hear “FBI” and go, “um, what the hell is happening? I should stop trying to fuck rn.”

Kurt starts burning papers. Is no one going to point out that maybe being on the phone (after you KNOW you’ve had NSA issues) talking about tips from powerful criminals and asking questions that are pretty clearly about document destruction... is a bad strategy?

Dude, why are you STILL GOING after Liz clearly tells you to stop!? Do you want me to hate you?!

Liz adds Jay to the call. He is asleep and also his hallucination from the premiere is (sadly) back. I still don’t get what they’re going for with this, so I’ll just be happy that (1) there is only one hallucination this time and (2) it’s only on screen for a minute.

This dude is really chanting “Let me see ‘em!” at Liz while she is on a frantic work call! This is how we are introduced to him! This is not funny! If this weren’t being played for laughs/to raise the stakes by having a lot going on I would be calling this man misogynistic!

Liz remembers that Diane has full boxes of files! They spill onto the floor as she tries to hide them! Drama!

And then the FBI arrives, so Diane asks Liz to take her 9 am with Wackner

The FBI enters, accompanied by... Nancy Crozier! Nancy is now an AUSA for some reason!

Nancy has graduated from “just a girl from Michigan” to using her pregnancy for dramatic effect. I guess she’s aged into being Patti Nyholm, or something. (I would LOVE to see Patti Nyholm show up on TGF.)

I know the client files are top of mind for Diane, but isn’t it kind of obvious that the FBI would be there about Kurt, given that the FBI was talking to Kurt days earlier?

9 mins in is early for credits!! (This first act flies, too—did not feel like 9 minutes.)

I say this once an episode, but isn’t it so fun to see all the characters from season one of TGW pop up in season five of TGF?

Liz sees her new man, Del Cooper, in reception. He’s a client. They try to be professional with each other. Liz remembers Diane’s 9 am with Wackner and asks the receptionist to tell her when he arrives. She dismissively says it’s “Some judge guy.” Wackner is, of course, already there and watching the interaction with interest. He uses this as an opportunity to “look for the restroom,” observe Liz meeting with someone else, and walk down to the associate floor.

He asks associate Leah (we’ve definitely seen her several times before) where he’s supposed to go for the staff meeting. She asks if he means the partner meeting or the associate one—he wants whichever is more interesting. She says she only knows about the associate meeting, and so he tags along.

Leah and Lucy (the associate from last week; Michael Boatman’s daughter) talk and assume that Wackner is from STR Laurie and thus in charge of the fate of their careers.

The associate meeting is fairly small—Leah refers to it as their “daily” so I wonder if it’s more like a team meeting than a meeting of all the associates.

The COTW is about a comedian who isn’t always PC. FakeNetflix is getting a lot of Twitter pushback.

“Ah, so you’re worried about being cancelled,” Liz notes. “Don’t say the ‘C’ word,” Del jokes. Then he asks the firm to do a sensitivity read of the comedian’s act.

Liz asks why them. David doesn’t get why she’s asking, though obviously Liz knows he won’t be offended by her question since they have a relationship outside of work. Del thinks that RL is the right firm for this task because they are a black firm, and also because this can be an audition for the rest of their legal business.

This seems like it is better for a PR firm or image consultant? Not a law firm? But sure.

Diane explains the whole January 6th situation to Liz. Liz immediately understands that if Kurt is in trouble, Diane is the one representing him. Because Kurt is Kurt, I’m willing to accept the “spouses-representing-each-other" trope here. But let the record reflect that, as always on this show, it is a TERRIBLE idea to have your spouse represent you! Just pick someone outside of the firm! JUST PICK ELSBETH, KURT.

Diane asks how her 9 am went; David Lee interrupts to ask Liz why she is being so casual with Del. “David, I am on the phone,” Liz responds. I love that she doesn’t really answer him.

Leah and Lucy try to turn the associate meeting into a showcase of how great they are; the other associates catch on quickly and all are happy to answer Wackner’s questions. He wants to understand jury trials.

Nancy’s pregnancy act does not work on Judge Farley, yet she keeps it up anyway. Court doesn’t go well for Diane, but it also doesn’t go well for Nancy.

Some of these interactions remind me a little too much of Peter’s trial at the end of TGW, like this one where Nancy goes to Diane with information about Kurt.

Leah gets off the elevator as Diane and Nancy talk, and to Diane’s surprise, Wackner is shadowing Leah! She takes a moment to look surprised before we return to the scene with Nancy.

I like all the little interactions within this Wackner plot. Diane asking Liz to meet with Wackner both connects Wackner to Liz AND shows that Diane would turn to Liz for back-up, and having Wackner/Leah run into Diane in court is a good reminder that even though Diane is dealing with a pressing issue, Wackner hasn’t just disappeared.

Diane encourages Kurt to talk. She wants to know if he’s not telling her something because she’s his wife or because she’s his lawyer. This is maybe why you don’t hire your wife as your lawyer.

Kurt says it’s because of politics—Diane doesn’t like that, since this is one issue where their politics should be shared.

“Diane, this works between us because we don’t let our political judgements overwhelm our respect for each other,” Kurt explains. But... is that relevant to this particular issue?

Diane asks the same question, essentially, noting that January 6th changed “everything” for her and she can’t treat this like a “chess game” anymore. Kurt wants to know what she’s calling a chess game. She says their marriage is the one thing that’s not a game.

On one level I understand exactly what Diane is saying and on another level I have no clue what this dialogue actually means. She can’t treat things like a game anymore, but also their marriage is the only thing that isn’t a game? So does that mean she can treat everything else like a game, then? I think what she’s trying to say is that the time for seeing political disagreements as a calm and rational game of strategy is over, and that she values her marriage and won’t play around with it.

Kurt tells her what he burned—a list of people in his little group. He says he’d protect them just like he’d protect Diane’s book group friends. Oh, wow, I was not EVER expecting to hear about that arc again! This is a pretty perfect time to mention it, though, since Kurt DID protect book group for the exact same reason he’s protecting the members of his club.

Other than “winning over a new client is important,” I have no idea why Liz and David Lee would gather together a group of partners to do the sensitivity read. I don’t know who IS the appropriate person to do the sensitivity read, given that this is a law firm, but I know this is a bad call.

Oh, they are going to go through line by line dissecting each joke in a group. They get through one joke before Madeline notes that the comedian is “objectifying black men.” A black male partner says he doesn’t mind. Madeline says that doesn’t matter because the joke is racially insensitive.

Overlapping chatter ensues, and the partners try to make changes to the comedian’s jokes, like substituting Norwegian for Nigerian. This... is not what law firms do. The joke isn’t funny with the substitution, but it also wasn’t funny before. It was low hanging fruit and the correct answer is to just cut it entirely. (Also, if you’re a comedian and all your jokes are about common stereotypes of groups to which you do not belong, you are probably not a very funny comedian!)

Diane has Jay do some more investigating. Jay looks up when Diane says, “ringleader of the insurrectionists,” and Diane is just like, “I know.” Then Carmen walks in.

Diane congratulates Carmen on “hitting the ground running” and then asks again how she knew about the warrant. Diane says she’s covered by the same attorney-client privilege, so Carmen should be able to share. Carmen notes the warrant was actually about Kurt, which does not answer Diane’s question. “So this came from Rivi?” Diane asks. Carmen says she can’t confirm.

“Carmen. You have been here three weeks. You have two clients: Wolfe-Coleman and Oscar Rivi. It’s one or the other!” Diane notes. Yep. I love that they didn’t forget that this isn’t much of a mystery. It’s more about principle than anything. If Diane knows it’s one of two sources and needs more information, I’m sure Jay can figure it out.

Carmen knows she’s stuck, so she asks if she can make a phone call. “I think that would be smart,” Diane says.

I’ve noticed that Liz and Diane are both being quite firm with others this season—and I like it. They're spending more time with lower-level characters, and both Diane and Liz have reasons to be more curt this year. Diane is under a lot of stress and it’s showing in all of her interactions; Liz is making a point of seeming in control to establish herself as the leader of the firm.

Then Marissa walks in. “What is going on with your crazy court judge?” Diane asks. “My?” Marissa asks. “Marissa, I am in no mood for defensiveness,” Diane insists. She mentions Wackner missing his meeting and shadowing Leah. That’s news to Marissa.

Marissa heads to Wackner’s court to figure out what’s going on.

Wackner is now experimenting with juries. This is interesting to me—I'd wondered before how smart it was to just have Wackner make all the rulings, so exploring the idea of having a jury shows he’s thinking about that, too. Also, it’s another sign that Wackner wants his court to have many of the same structures as a real courtroom. There are still judges, juries, witnesses, trials—he's starting something new, but it feels more like he’s testing out improvements for an imperfect system. I wonder if his end goal would be to set up separate courts, or if he’s more interested in shaping laws/reforming the system? Surely Wackner has ambitions of scaling up whatever conclusions he comes to. So what are they?

The reason for the juries is that the associates told him that juries are racially biased, so he’s trying to correct it. He also explains how he ended up shadowing Leah, and advises Marissa to go exploring whenever she’s kept waiting. (I have a feeling Marissa doesn’t need to be told this, but then, that’s why she’s Wackner’s “muse.”)

Marissa notes that Wackner’s court is looking nicer—there must be money coming in from somewhere new. Wackner confirms there’s been a sympathetic donor.

Wackner is dealing with a case about NFT fraud. Marissa says she doesn’t know what that is. I’m going to assume that Marissa is using Wackner’s strategies against him (she had just accused him of playing dumb to get others to talk) because I cannot believe that Marissa, who always knows random facts, ESPECIALLY ones that involve weird corners of the internet, would not know what an NFT is.

Marissa hears the case is about $4 million, and she’s shocked because this raises the stakes a little more than even she is comfortable with. Wackner has a signed and notarized document saying that both sides will honor the verdict. It is, as Marissa points out, notarized in 9 ¾ court by Wackner about a fictional case. “About a fictional crime,” Wackner adds on.

I’m a little surprised this is all these writers had to say about NFTs! Maybe they knew that by the time this aired, the actual topic would feel dated.

Mandy Patinkin is just SO GOOD as Wackner! I’m watching a fictional show about a fictional crime in a fictional court and even I am starting to believe in his ludicrous court!

Wackner’s jury selection process involves catching potential jurors in traps, like pretending to know the national anthem when they don’t. Smart. Probably super problematic if you think about it too hard and put it in the wrong people’s hands and people start to know the system. But smart, for now.

Diane is now in the sensitivity read meeting, for reasons passing understanding. They are still talking about the first joke. Jay calls Liz out of the meeting and notes that everyone in the room is old and no one is funny. “I’m funny!” Liz argues. Diane tries to leave the meeting, and Liz tells Diane Jay’s idea about needing younger people. “Oh god yes,” Diane agrees. I’m glad she sees it and a little alarmed that Liz doesn’t! I feel like they should’ve sent the tape to everyone interested in participating, then asked them to write up (separately) anything they found questionable or offensive, and gone from there, ending with a close review of anything that wasn’t previously flagged. If you debate every single line for hours you’re going to get nowhere.

I don’t know why Liz is so concerned that Jay thinks she’s not funny? But she is.

Diane asks Liz to join her meeting with Carmen and Lester. This is a scene I’ve been waiting for! Diane and Liz are both there and so the scene FEELS important. The plot advances. And, most importantly, they address why Carmen is staying at RL!

Lester reiterates that Carmen is super important to Rivi, so if Carmen says she can’t share info, then she can’t share info. Liz and Diane do not accept this. “I am a name partner. Carmen is a first-year associate,” Liz says. “Now, Carmen is free to resign and hang her shingle wherever she’d like. She can even go and work for you. That is up to her. But while she is here, she is subject to the rules and the mentoring of this firm.”

Lester tries to take Carmen out of the meeting. Liz and Diane won’t let him: They need to know if Carmen is staying with the firm, now.

“You have a lot to learn, Carmen. And you can only do that here,” Diane pitches. I don’t think that’s exactly true, but it’s not untrue.

Here is a question I have about Carmen: she is WILLING to represent drug dealers and rapists. Does she WANT to? She chooses RL, so I’m guessing her interests lie in big law and not in aiding criminals.

Lester leaves, but not before saying Kurt is about to get a grand jury summons. Diane gets one too. It’s not the usual guy! Too bad.

A bigger group is now deciding on if jokes are offensive or not, and they’re doing so with paddles that are red on one side (offensive) and green on the other (funny). I’m sure this is going to go well.

The group sees the replacement jokes and they are confused. Marissa wants to see the original joke. Julius shows the room, and everyone laughs. The joke is funny—and offensive. Someone from the mail room notes that he would be the butt of this joke, but he finds it funny, so he thinks the comedian should be able to continue with her set.

Here is where I think I fall on this: Get sensitivity reads to get ahead of any huge issues (like, don’t be Pepsi with the ad with whichever Jenner it was who solved racism). Be aware of the potential issues. Let viewers decide what is and isn’t offensive, and make informed decisions rather than arbitrary rules about what content to show. You’ll KNOW if you are indulging the tendencies of someone with a history of making the same type of problematic jokes (for example, maybe if you are reviewing something by Tina Fey and she tries to write another edgy plot where racial stereotypes are the punchline, you advise her to not do that because, I mean, why WERE there so many episodes of 30 Rock that involved blackface??). You’ll KNOW if you are giving a platform to someone who is actively trying to spread misinformation and be cruel to others. Someone’s going to be offended by everything, and it may be a huge deal and it may not be. IMO, it doesn’t really matter that I can’t make an exact set of rules about what is/isn’t smart to air. I don’t think anyone—not networks, not creators, and not audiences—would benefit from that. Lawyers might, though, for all the billable hours...

“You can’t tell a joke without offending someone,” Jay notes. I do not think this is true! Puns don’t offend anyone!

David Lee’s counter-example to Jay’s point is Gilbert & Sullivan. Of course it is.

As always, the argument devolves into overlapping chatter. These episodes exhaust me. At least this episode has some fun with the topic of the week and seems to have more of a point of view than some of the past episodes where the only conclusion is, “Wow! Controversy is controversial!”

Marissa ends up in the mail room with Jay and one of the mailroom guys (captions say his name is Jimmy). They are mocking the partner’s ideas of comedy. Jay and Jimmy agree that the best comedy is mean. But, Jay says, now it feels like you need “a permission slip to tell a joke.” Is... this true? This feels like one of those things people who would never actually get “cancelled” worry about because their fear overtakes their ability to understand what really gets someone cancelled.

Then again, this episode was written by professional writers who would absolutely know better than I am if people are really hesitant to tell jokes.

Jimmy has started making literal permission slips to allow people to tell jokes about specific groups. Jay and Marissa are down.

Jay asks Jimmy to make a card for something so inappropriate he wouldn’t joke about it... and Jimmy prints a card that says Greta Thunberg. No one wants to joke about that.

And you know why this joke lands well for me? Part of it is that the vibe of this scene is very fun and laid back. But mostly it’s because Younger tried to make a Greta Thunberg joke this season, and it was quite possibly the worst, most embarrassing thing I’ve seen a TV show do in ages. It wasn’t funny, just mean, over the top, lazy, and never-ending. (Poor Younger. That show had an awful final season.)

Liz is still worried she’s not funny. She asks Del if she’s funny and mentions Jay’s comment. He says she’s funny, but she’s not convinced he’s being honest. He points out this is a discussion no one will win. Del ends up accidentally saying “I love you” to Liz, which is a big deal for a relationship we’ve seen for all of two seconds. Liz says they don’t have to talk about it, but Del insists on explaining that he meant “affection,” not love. I’m glad they’re talking about this.

“Then maybe we should get married,” Liz says as seriously as possible. She stares at Del and smiles. He laughs and admits that was funny. It was VERY funny!

Grand jury time! Yet Another Ham Sandwich: The Sequel: The Musical: The Series. (Am I funny? Pls tell me I’m funny and hip with the teens!)

It’s Diane’s turn first. She does well, but there’s not much to say when Nancy plays the recording of Diane phoning the FBI with the rioter’s name. I did not need the clip from last episode in here. Diane is calm in court, but rushes to tell Kurt immediately. Nancy predicted Diane would do that, so she calls in Kurt before Diane has a chance to warn him.

So, wait, Kurt thought all of this was just a COINCIDENCE? Diane didn’t tell him earlier?! I don’t love this choice, but okay.

Liz finds a joke permission slip on her desk. Julius has one too. “Did you use it?” Liz asks. Julius doesn’t understand what that even means. Then they trade clothes, because Liz does want to tell a joke about white girl clothes.

Julius suspects the cards are a way to make fun of the partners for being unfunny. The associates are also chatting about the cards, having lots of fun, so it’s clearly not about the partners.

I think now is an appropriate time to mention that TGW and TGF have both been consistently hilarious shows and have been on the air for a combined twelve years. Neither rely on the types of jokes that these cards permit. This is a kind of interesting thought experiment, but... doesn’t it say something that the shows never use these jokes as crutches and still manage to be funny? This is what I meant earlier about people being afraid of cancel culture when they’re not actually really at risk of coming under fire. These writers know how to write things that are funny. They know how to make comedy out of absurdity and subverting expectations. And yet they’re worried about how to have jokes that aren’t mean? Really?

The first laugh out loud funny TGW moment that comes to mind right now is the episode that ends with that obnoxious talk show guy trying to out Diane as a lesbian. That joke deals with identity. But it still holds up 12 years later, because the joke isn’t that Diane could be gay... the joke is that Diane DOES NOT GIVE A SHIT what this pest is saying about her on TV, and so she laughs. And because the tension of the talk show guy’s BIG DRAMATIC REVEAL is cut with Diane’s dynamic, loud laugh, we laugh with her! I’m not really sure what I'm trying to illustrate with this example. I’m just noting that you can be topical, funny, and entirely appropriate at the same time... and these writers are great at finding that balance.

HR starts, like, texting (they TEXT Marissa!!!) employees about the joke permission slips? It’s so bizarrely done that I thought this was going to be a prank.

Jay decides they won’t go to HR, and Jimmy decides they’ll delay. Why wouldn’t HR just come down and take away the cards?

For this week’s dose of Wackner Wackiness, witnesses will be fully costumed, and it goes without saying that the costumes will be as over the top as possible.

David Cord is the mysterious donor. Marissa spots him and instantly puts the pieces together. Cord explains he met Wackner on the elevator. I can’t say enough how much I like that this season has a lot of moving pieces that feel like part of a whole. Cord showed up as part of a case that caused internal debate at the firm and had a thematic parallel to an ongoing plot, then crossed over into Wackner’s plot once he was established as a character!

Cord says he’s interested in “disrupting things” so he’s interested in Wackner. I did not need the still photo of where they founded HP that’s used to illustrate humble beginnings, I guess.

Nancy mentions Kurt’s unfortunate last name—she so would. Kurt takes the fifth. Was this thing about needing a reason to take the fifth true in the earlier seasons and just not mentioned? Didn’t Kalinda and Will use this strategy?

Nancy, obviously, plays the recording of Diane reporting the rioter. Kurt conceals his reaction for the grand jury, but he’s pissed.

Diane tries to apologize and Kurt asks for another lawyer. This is the right move. I can’t be all that sad.

The partners have collected all the cards and are trying to do damage control with HR. (Interestingly, there are certain topics the cards we see don’t touch on. Like, where’s the rape joke card? Aren’t rape jokes what we usually talk about when we talk about comedians getting cancelled? And where are the jokes about minority groups (aside from little people, referred to using the PC name instead of the names that would probably be used in most offensive jokes about little people) not represented in the TGF cast? I find this little bit of self-censorship quite notable, especially given that the writers seem to be arguing in favor of not regulating humor. These omissions, which MUST be intentional, tell me the writers do have their own lines they won’t cross...)

(My larger point there, and where this funny-but-unnecessary subplot fails for me, is that this whole episode feels like a bit of a panic over cancel culture and winds up being a strawman argument. I don’t disagree with the conclusions the writers come to and I do find some of these scenes funny. But at the same time, I don’t think Cancel Culture is actually about coming after every single joke that makes fun of any person or group (if we must do a cancel culture plot, why not do one about someone who is an odious person and yet still has a following even after they’ve been “cancelled”). And I don’t think that showing HR as a very stern, strict, humorless body is helpful. I’m getting ahead of myself, but all that accomplishes is having Liz win on a point that pretty much everyone can agree on, because no one is actually as humorless as STRL’s HR department! Humor has so many gray areas and if you try to make it black and white, obviously the side that’s saying YOU CANNOT MAKE JOKES ABOUT ANYTHING is going to be the one that is wrong.

I did just remember that all of these writers have probably dealt with unfun and strict standards & practices departments, and I like the way HR is portrayed more if I try to imagine them as Standards & Practices.

Liz decides she is going to see HR so she’s seen as an authority figure, not someone subversive. But first, Liz has to meet with Del and the comedian.

Wackner and Cord are in Diane’s office. Diane’s skeptical of their alliance. She also points out that it is corrupt for Wackner to be financed by Cord and decide on Cord’s cases. This is true. Cord says he has no vested interest in any of the cases. And Wackner says he’s the “most untouchable man on earth” and quotes a song again. Yet another example of how this court only works if Wackner is in charge.

The comedy meeting does not go well. David Lee is already trying to pitch their other servicces. The comedian finds the censored version hilarious in how terrible it is, and then she starts making fun of it, loudly, and for way too long.

David thinks it went poorly; Liz isn’t concerned. David is all, “you failed” and Liz asks him to cool it and notes that David isn’t the highest-ranking person at STRL, so he should “stop the shit” and work with her. She’s already sounding more like a boss.

Julius complements her on being “Boseman-like,” which is true (though I wish she didn’t need to be compared to her ex-husband). “I know,” Liz says quietly, likely because she hates that Adrian is still influencing her this much.

Del joins Wackner and Cord in the elevator, and this isn’t the end of the episode but I’m going to pretend it is so all the episodes can end on elevators this year. It’s close enough.

Kurt’s new lawyer is Julius. Ah, yes, choose the corrupt judge Trump pardoned who works at your wife’s firm to represent you. Seems smart.

Liz walks past Diane’s office and the camera follows her up to HR. She tries to get HR to understand humor. They do not. And that’s the episode.

So, a few thoughts to conclude. First, I went into this recap thinking I’d have a lot more to say about cancel culture and the way this episode handled the debate. But I ended up liking this plot—and this episode-- more the second time around. I still don’t think this episode said anything groundbreaking about cancel culture, because I don’t think it actually engaged with the topic beyond the surface. As I noted earlier, coming to the conclusion that jokes should be allowed because we’re all human isn’t really a resolution the real topic. What about accountability? What about allowing for some jokes to be too far without taking the teeth out of every joke? What about the way people panic over cancel culture when they’re not being canceled (this episode felt a little bit like a panic over cancel culture, which is why I reacted negatively to it the first time through) or about how cancellation doesn’t always stick or have meaning? There is SOMETHING to explore here, but I don’t think this episode found that something.

Second, because I didn’t find a way to work it in above... is it me, or is it actually HELPING the show to not have Adrian or Lucca around!? This season feels so much more focused than the past several, and I think it might be because the writers (who are, as always, very good at adapting to curveballs) had to restructure the show. Lucca always had her own subplots that were separate from everything else, and Adrian’s charisma tended to overpower others’ presence (especially Liz’s) whenever he was in the room. It didn’t help that the writers seemed to LOVE writing Adrian plots, even if it meant neglecting others.

Don’t get me wrong—I love Adrian and Lucca both. But there’s something to be said for a tighter show with three main interconnected pieces (Liz/firm drama, Diane/FBI and Kurt, Marissa/Wackner’s court) that carry over from episode to episode. Like the titles of the season, these episodes build on each other.

Also, there’s the right amount of every character this season. David Lee is used sparingly; Jay and Julius are supporting players who sometimes get the spotlight; Wackner is a huge presence but his plot feels like part of the show; Carmen feels important but isn’t being given screentime for the sake of screentime; Liz is finally the type of lead she should’ve been from the start; Marissa has nicely grown into a role closer to leading than supporting; Diane remains a clear lead.

5x05 next week!!! I am expecting some Hitting the Fan level quality and at least one fan-service-y reference. (Not really, but wouldn’t it be fun?)

#tgfthoughts #the good fight

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truly-morgan · 3 years

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Fanfic idea am too tired to write for now pt.1

So I have many fanfiction Idea, yet my dumb ass is just way too tired in so many ways to actually write anything for now, so I decided “Why not just make a list and see what people enjoy, might give me motivation”. This might be a multi-fandom post, depending on how many idea I can brings back from my bad memory.

After all, what better than writing a fanfic is to just dumb down the plot and ramble about me ideas.

TodoBakuDeku

Soulmate marks AU

They are all soulmates, and two of them a really dumb. The two first to notice are Midoriya and Todoroki. Somewhere after the sport festival, they happen to be changing at the same time for X reason and one of them notice they have a matching marks. We have two dorks unsure what to do, but they decided “Hey, lets give it a chance, we are already on a good start”.

Everything goes well, everyone do kinda notice how close they have become, but hey maybe it just how they are with close friend (especially with poor Shouto being a novice at friendship). But, one day when they are all changing after a sport class, Kirishima points out how similar Bakugo’s mark is to Midoriya’s one, making our explosive boy mad but then realise they have the same. Somehow these two childhood friend either never actually notice it (tbf, Bakugo’s mark isn’t that visible) or just erased that information from their memory if it was ever discovered.

And then we have Todoroki and Midoriya unsure what to do since they weren’t expecting to add a third person (after all it is rather rare thing to happen, but not in my fanfic), while Bakugo is just confused at how this situation as escalated quickly. Then we simply have a couples chapter seeing how thing are evolving between them, maybe some jealous Bakugo who didn’t want any of that at first but didn’t like seeing them this close when he could be a parts of it.

And somehow I wanna have Kirishima trying to help his friends, because of course he would, despite being confused by missing the part where Todoroki is also part of the equation.

Fantasy AU

This one would probably need to be cut in two parts? Like I imagine them meeting on a first quest and kind of slowly falling for each other that way? Like, Midoriya was already on this quest with Iida and Uraraka, joined later by prince Todoroki after Midoriya broke the ice (dum dum tss). They probably meet Bakugo on the way, already acquainted with Midoriya because of past event and decide to tag along “Because I was already going there, anyway Deku would get himself kill if he went alone”. So they ends up kind of bonding over the thing they live through and after killing the demon or something.

Second part is something I feel has more seriousness to it, happening a couple years later, where their relationship is something along the line of “I have no clue what relationship I have with these two exactly, there seems to be something but am not sure, but one thing I know is I am ready to die or kill for them”.

This would happen where Todoroki’s kingdom is dragged into war against the dragonkin because they are allies of the one going against them for land and riches. Todoroki has no choice but to actually follow his dad and obviously Bakugo will take care of his kind. I was imagining this whole scene going where Todoroki asks Midoriya to choice what he knew he wouldn’t regrets doing later on (so obviously going with Bakugo). A truly difficult choice, but the both understand, especially Bakugo, that he has obligation and no real choice in the matter if he wants things to change later on.

So we have this whole war going on, learning that Todoroki was working a little more in the background to actually help or makes thing less bad for the dragonkin when he his the one in commands.

One of the rare fanfic where I had some ideas about how to end this story, despite it being rather unsure yet.

BakuDeku

a/b/o

I was going to make a follow up to Bond where we see some snippet from their daily lives as official mates (yet hidden from the public for obvious reason). I already had a couple of ideas for this one, not sure if it actually count as a fanfiction since all the chapter would be rather “unrelated” to one another, each a little story that doesn’t exactly have a follow up in another chapter.

AllEraserMic

Everyone dies trilogy

I am an angtsy bitch and already started this mini-serie with They Both Knew. It was suppose to only be one story at first, then I wondered “How would the different duo react to on of them dying”. So I already did the Toshinori one, am missing Aizawa and Hizashi. This is purely to write angst since it had been a while since I actually wrote angst (I swear I wanted to cry when writing in on the bus something, the hospital scene was the worst).

So yeah, this is at least already kind of started I suppose.

Soulmate Marks AU

(Can y’all see what kind of jam I like?). This one is an idea that has already be seen quite many time in this ship dynamic, where Both Aizawa and Hizashi are in a nice relationship after discovering they were soulmates when studying at UA. So what happens when Toshinori realise that they are both his soulmate? Of course he can’t tell them, after all he wouldn’t want to break that happy couple.

Of course he’s not the most subtle man on earth about it and the couple does notice how weird he seems to act and how much more than before he make sure that his marks stay hidden.

EraserMic

Villain!Mic

This would most likely be based around the Villain Mic Au created by @corndog-patrol because I just really love her Villain!Mic so much (this is the kind of villain I really love too) and it gave me ideas. Go check her little comics about this AU, it’s absolutely lovely.

This would most likely be a slow burn (because that’s my speciality at this point), with different accounters they have throughout Eraserhead patrols, where he slowly get a better understanding of how Mic actually is, which mean not really a villain, despite Mic trying to convince him otherwise.

I like the idea of working with a Mic who is convince his quirk cannot be use for good because he was convince early on that his quirk is dangerous (painfully proved by his now bad hearing), yet still act in more ways that would be seen a heroic rather than villainous.

Am not an original person when it comes to AU apparently, but I just really like this idea and wanted to play with it a little bit.

If you want a good fanfic that is already written in that setting please go check out Villainous Heroics by Ibelieveinahappilyeverafter. I hope I won’t get subconsciously inspired by it (or at least not too much) when I write this.

BillDip

Reversed a/b/o Dynamic

So I already started it, this is probably cheating, but I don’t have the energy to write right now so fuck it ╮(￣ω￣;)╭. So this is an AU reversing the abo usual dynamic and omega are instead treated very well, coming from a twitter tread i had seen.

The twins are both actors (Mabel the film industry and Dipper more on the theater scene) and Bill is the CEO of the studio for which Mabel’s work. He basically meets Dipper when he was going to greet Mabel and fall head over heel for him, making him want to court him.

This is a rather fluff oriented story, where they slowly get to know each other better and Bill trying to court Dipper because in this house we respect omegas. This is a much more light hearted story than some of the one presented higher in this post. I was only going to start really writing it after finishing my two other AU (the 20′s speakeasy and zombie apocalypse ones), but when i get back into writing I might do that.

Lets make a deal AU

So I already presented this one in a previous list, but I really wanna get to write it down at some point.

This is where Dipper as a lot of confidence issue, comparing himself with his family and not seeing anything good in himself. I wanted to play on Bill not necessarily doing weirdmagedon that year and instead taking interest in Dipper.

I wanted to see Bill slowly pulling Dipper in after getting interested in him and thinking his great mind could help him in his plan. Also what better thing than to have one of the wheel sign on your side?

This is more on a Dark!Dipper AU kind of vibe, where the relationship is probably not as wholesome and good as the other one I’ve written until now, but I wanted to see something different.

Welp, can y’all tell I got interested in bnha lately? (if some of my many doodle of it wasn.t telling). I feel like I write for only two fandom despite loving many show. It just sometimes I feel like I would really be able to do it well? Like I’ve read many Hannibal fanfic, but I don’t think I would be able to write one whom is really good.

Anyway, these are the idea I really wanna write at some point, might get to do it in my not so existent free time or if I don’t feel like reading on the bus.

#fanfiction ideas #fanfiction i want to write #todobakudeku #tododeku #todobaku #bakudeku #allerasermic #erasermic #my hero academia #boku no hero academia #billdip #gravity falls #alternate universe

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zmediaoutlet · 3 years

Text

tagged by my good buddy @doilycoffin and uhh some number of other people to do the little tumblr survey game thing, and eve you are an absolute hero for including the clean copy at the end, thank you --

1. why did you choose your url?

I am Z and this is my Media Outlet. Although originally twitter was.

2. any sideblogs? if you have them, name them and why you have them.

Absolutely not, I can barely keep this one running. Also, I can’t imagine curating that much. People can handle seeing a Hannibal post instead of a Spn post, and if they can’t -- man, good luck to them.

3. how long have you been on tumblr?

I actually saw a thing from tumblrmemories today that reminded me that this post even existed, and so I can answer: apparently, I joined this tumblr place at 04/05/2012 3:26:41 PM. I have zero memory of the moment, lol.

4. do you have a queue tag?

I do not, but that’s because everything I post is queued. Y’all don’t know when I’m on here, I am mysterious. ...I am not, it’s just that I don’t like clogging people’s dashboards. So I queue for like an hour and then bounce.

5. why did you start your blog in the first place?

...I don’t remember! I guess because lj was collapsing like a flan in a cupboard, and there wasn’t anywhere particularly relevant to go when you were looking for fandom content. But I don’t remember what fandom it was, back then! That was a few months before I started watching spn.

6. why did you choose your icon/pfp?

(i keep seeing pfp and all I can read there is pirst ferson pooter.) My icon is just... my little happy man! He’s so happy, look at him. <3 And I think he’s been the icon since April 5, 2012. Y’all who can like change your icons and whatnot are impressive to me. And confusing. Both of those.

7. why did you choose your header?

...I don’t think I have a header. Do I? Now I’m feeling very losttravolta.gif.

8. what’s your post with the most notes?

uhh I think it might be that dumb ficlet I wrote where Dean gets turned into the teeniest of dragons and is trying to hoard Sam’s junk.

9. how many mutuals do you have?

literally no idea how to find this out

10. how many followers do you have?

just under 1400, a bunch of whom are probably dead accounts or noninteractive, which I guess isn’t much to show for almost ten years, is it. Should’ve learned to make gifs.

11. how many people do you follow?

just under 300, a much of whom are probably dead accounts or noninteractive, lol.

12. have you ever made a shitpost?

I don’t think so. I don’t have the shitpost energy!

13. how often do you use tumblr each day?

um, <1 hour on average. Some days I don’t come on at all, some days the scroll goes on a little longer.

14. did you have a fight/argument with another blog once? who won?

I have never intentionally started a fight with any blog, but a few people have gotten GROSSLY OFFENDED by posts I’ve made and tried to fight with me. My reaction, like a somnolent bear, is to be confused and wonder why someone’s making such a big fuss. I guess they won, since I blocked them and/or they blocked me, and they got to feel superior because they’d shown me what’s what. And they also won because I still think about it with bewildered annoyance years later, lol. Why did you turn into such a bitch over a headcanon post? Oh well, I’ll mildly hate them forever.

15. how do you feel about “you need to reblog this” posts?

They’re grossly stupid.

16. do you like tag games?

I do! Look at me doing one. It’s very high school, very sitting around past midnight on a sleepover.

17. do you like ask games?

I do! Same answer.

18. which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous?

uh, none? How does one even measure such a thing.

19. do you have a crush on a mutual?

absolutely not, oh my. EDIT: WAIT yes why not I have a big somnolent bear crush on doilycoffin. Let me woo your Texas heart or whatever, you goth grandma you! <3, >3.

20. tags?

idk who of y’all is doing what. These questions kinda got less interesting as they went down, haha, but I’ll toss out some tags anyway, uh -- @themegalosaurus, @alaynestone, @stripperlecki, @wetsammywinchester, @watermelonlipstick, @peach-coke, aaaand we’ll call that good.

#ask meme #or close enough to one #this isn't really getting to know you #it's like... metrics #kinda odd #but still worth looking at ig

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jzixuans · 4 years

Note

please sir, can I have some tog fic recs?

oh SO many hold on okay (these are all gonna be on ao3)

also under the cut to spare my poor followers

i’ll lay my roots in fertile ground by itsmylifekay (13154 words)

Andy did this on purpose, she’s sure of it. No matter how many excuses about skillsets and plans and 'you’ve been working on your Arabic, it’ll be good practice, Nile'… she knows now it was all a bunch of lies. There can be no other explanation for why she has been here, stuck with Joe in the middle of a hot, Italian summer while Andy has taken Nicky to the northern most part of France. It is a unique and unexpected kind of hell.

(A series of seven stories, snapshots of the first few years of Nile's time with the team. I'm trash for Nile & Nicky & Joe dynamics so there's a lot of that in here, but the others are all part of the craziness as well.)

fluffy slice of life post movie, really funny, really soft, i love how the author built their relationships

though you are alone and not quite beyond loneliness by dialux (26238 words)

“Joe didn’t lie back in that lab,” Booker tells him gently. “I am selfish. I am a liar. But beyond everything else, Nicky, I’m a coward.”

“Really,” says Nicky, looking unimpressed.

[Booker tries to save his family from Quynh. He's rather good at it, if not a little dramatic about the entire process. In the meantime, he learns a little more about himself, his family, and the definitions of bravery, forgiveness and love.]

a study in booker! real in depth, real great long read. (warning for antagonist quỳnh)

even if we win the battle by glitter_lisp (2591 words)

"Our Nile may have missed her calling,” Nicky says with a choked, hoarse laugh. “She should have been an actor. Or a surgeon.”

Then he slumps over in Joe's arms, unconscious, and Nile drops the scalpel, spins around, and throws up on the carpet.

whump but oh so good. focus on nile + nicky after a particularly harrowing mission with some good good nile + joe. (warnings for torture, mentions of throwing up (i mean it’s in the summary), blood, and some leftover trauma)

six summers down by sharkhette (3385 words)

Nile watched the first rays of the sun come filtering through the trees, softly dappling the path in yellow and grey. "Tell me something good?" she asked. "Everything's been such a shitshow since I met you—since even before that. And now, with Booker gone, and Andy…" She swallowed and turned to Nicky, who watched her with big, soft eyes. "Just tell me something I can look forward to in all this."

nile and nicky go for a run. the consequences of immortality catch up to her. some real good nile + nicky plus bonus immortal family at the end (warning for talk of quỳnh’s drowning)

atlas by bestillmyslashyheart (1336 words)

Nile is fine until she isn't. When the weight of her actions catches up to her, she needs someone to talk to.

some more nile + nicky from that time i deep dived the tag. for when you want to imagine nicky scooping you up in a big warm hug

i found love where it wasn’t supposed to be by imadetheline (1070 words)

Nile has a nightmare. Her family is there for her. And for one another.

late night immortal family dance party. makes you feel like everything is right in the world

at the crossings of two heart lines by mayqueen517 (4239 words)

"You understand - you cannot look back until you both stand beneath the sun."

"I do not need to see my love to know he is there. He is the breath in my lungs and the beat of my heart."

"Very well." ---

A Joe/Nicky twist on the Orpheus/Eurydice myth.

if you thought hadestown made you cry, this’ll wrench you more. happy ending though!! (warnings for death (obv), so much despair and hopelessness)

this lifetime and the next by kirasometimes (6662 words)

Shortly after marrying the love of his life, Nicky dies and his husband disappears.

or: Nicky is newly immortal and Joe has no idea.

a super interesting take. it’s still living in my head two weeks later and i Really need to reread it. (warnings for death, blood, stabbings, canon typical violence i guess. lab capture)

#nickyisnotamouse (and other stories from a happy universe) by lydenicokite (6806 words)

It may be a cliché to say this (“I didn’t want to become famous, it just happened!”), but Nicolò’s youtube career started as a joke. Actually, it started with Yusuf, like all the best things in Nicky’s life.

Nicky is a famous Youtuber, even if most of his fans are more interested in Joe, the elusive cameraman who never appears in front of the camera but flirts with Nicky in every video, than in the actual cooking and book reviewing. #RevealTheHusband and #WhereIsJoe are trending on twitter every time Nicky uploads a new video, but Nicky still believes it's important to keep his life with Joe private. It can't be that difficult, right?

hilarious modern youtuber!nicky au with lots of great interactions between the team and also nicky’s adorable (warning for drinking)

this time with knives by arkada (3588 words)

Joe gets into trouble on a mission.

Nicky gets him back.

badass nicky with knives saves his husband. nile + nicky + joe on a mission. not as angsty as it sounds. (warning for canon typical violence, death (joes dies a good handful), lots of described stabbing and slashing, blood)

even oaks must bend by winteryknights (2631 words)

The sidestreets are dead silent compared to the bustle of downtown, letting both ease and worry simmer in Joe’s bones as they pass only occasional pedestrians on their walk to the address Copley had given them. It’s a small apartment, part of a stonework building that’s likely just as old as Booker himself and a part of Joe wonders if he’d chosen it for the familiarity. A bigger part of him finds that it still hurts to care.

Or,

Andy doesn't have ninety years, but she does have a plan.

they go get booker early. things are sorted out. nicky and joe’s pain is acknowledged and booker is held accountable

ever have i never by nilmiel (525 words)

“Never have I ever had Joe profess his undying love for me to a bunch of people trying to kill us.” Joe had run out to pick up the takeout they’d ordered, and Nile had decided to teach the remaining group of fossils she now called family a new game for while they waited. And if it was a game she was guaranteed to win? Well. That wasn’t on purpose. — A small fic in which Joe loves his family, and the immortal fam love Joe.

i just really like joe waxing poetic about his family

the devil you know by falseconfidence (2254 words)

In which Nile drives the getaway car for the first time and quickly learns that there's a reason why everyone in this family drinks.

where nicky is your annoying dad in the passenger seat and andy slashes the tires of a dickbag and nile is Very Tired (warning for brief canon typical violence, unsafe car practices)

let our moment linger by indiebitch (1466 words)

there was something so lovely about Yusuf being draped across him like this. The rise and fall of his stomach as a reminder that his love, his heart was still breathing. The happy little sighs Joe would let out every once in a while. It just made Nicky so happy he could weep.

or Nicky loving to watch his husband sleep

soft sleepy husbands fluff

i found peace in your violence by incurableromancer (1387 words)

Nile knows that Joe could take apart and reassemble any make or model of gun you put in front of him while blindfolded and probably handcuffed. She knows that he can competently fly more planes and man more ships than Nile has or will see for many, many years to come. She’s heard stories about him defusing bombs and making it home in time for dinner, and yet. He’s still mildly afraid of microwaves, and doesn’t know how to type with his thumbs. Nile has seen him cry at The Notebook, and then cry again hours later while telling Nicky about it.

Or: found family, and moments of happiness, peace and healing between the chaos.

nile and joe hang out!!!

hope these are enough to tide you over!! (and lmk if i missed a link or anything)

#the old guard #immortal family #joe x nicky #andy x quỳnh #nile + nicky #joe + nile #joe + nicky + nile #lad of inbox #ask #long post #fic recs

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fu-yao · 3 years

Photo

tagged by @leonzhng thanks for making me dig through my most embarrassing crushes 😭✋

i’ll tag @highwarlockkareena @yibobibo @lan-xichens @purplexedhuman @aheartfullofjolllly @lanzhansmiles @nyx4 i feel like i tag you guys in everything i am so sorry please ignore this if u don’t wanna do it !!

putting this under a read more for reasons

MEN 2010 – 2016

literally nothing more embarrassing than falling on the same type of white man over and over again (with the exception of minho from shinee bless his heart)

tommy joe ratliff → he was the bass player for adam lambert during his glamnation era (think of songs like for your entertainment and if i had you) idk why exactly i liked him so much but i just did.... however i searched him up again quite recently and found out he’s one of those republicans that says the dumbest shit on twitter so Big Yikes

harry styles → “baby you light up my world like nobody else, the way that you flip your hair gets me overwhelmed, and when you smile at the ground it ain’t hard to tell...” and BOOM 13-year-old me was sold for well over two years

louis tomlinson → basically i liked harry most until around 2013 when for some reason i started to like him a little less, and i got more focused on louis tomlinson, and although i didn’t like one direction anymore louis tomlinson always had a special place in my heart

ashton irwin → so ashton is 5sos’ drummer, i discovered 5sos through one direction & i stanned them until late 2014

harries twins → the harries twins (jack & finn) are basically the reason i started spending a lot of time on youtube, they were funny and pretty and they just had good videos in general, so for almost two years i’d watch their content regularly

choi minho → my first steps into kpop happened bc i was watching videos on youtube (most probably the harries twins) and suddenly i saw the sherlock mv in my recommended videos so i clicked on it and then 14-year-old me proceeded to fall for minho like an idiot

brooks twins → still youtubers, the brooks twins were 3/5 of the janoskians (jai & luke brooks, beau brooks, daniel sahyounie, & james yammouni), an australian youtube comedy group that was active from 2011-2018 though i was only around from 2012-2014 (when jai brooks was dating ariana grande)

jc caylen → surprise! another youtuber! jc caylen was part of o2l (our2ndlife) a youtube collaboration channel on which each of the 6 members posted videos on a certain day in the week (mondays with connor, tuesdays with ricky, wednesdays with sam, thursdays with jc, fridays with trevi (my 2nd favorite member bc she participated on the x factor), saturdays with ricardo, and then they had surprise sundays every week) and i remember how much joy jc & the others always brought me with their silly videos

misha collins → up next, you might know him as the gay angel that was sent to superhell after confessing his love to the homophobic hunter on supernatural, it’s misha collins! basically misha was a huge source of comfort for me, and i even went around calling myself emmisha for almost two full years (cringe)

henrik holm → he played even bech naesheim in skam and my crush on him reached that level of ridiculousness where i actually tried my hand at learning norwegian (i can only remember how to introduce myself and some curse words i would make a great first impression on him)

MEN 2016 – 2021

min yoongi → okay so my baby steps into kpop happened through shinee’s sherlock, but i only got really invested when yoongi dropped agust d 1 because Holy Fuck y’know??

kim namjoon → oh man i remember thinking namjoon was cute and a very good leader and then BAM he dressed like THAT at the 2016 mma’s and i fell in love. hard

park seojoon → i started liking park seojoon whilst i was watching hwarang (you guessed it, i watched it bc of taehyung), although he wasn’t my favorite character by far, but he was very silly off camera & i liked that (i’m not that into him anymore tho </3)

kim seokjin → OH BOY LET ME TELL U i liked seokjin from the very beginning (i got to know bts in late 2014) and i always liked seeing him perform and be himself and god once i realized i had a crush on him it just hit me like a mf truck, and he’s still one of my favorite people to this day

jung hoseok → god fake love era hoseok really hits different.... also yes i know i have all of bts’ hyung line on my list BUT bts was a really big part of my life for almost 6 years soooo honestly they deserve it i still think they’re great guys

choi san → when ateez made their debut in 2018 i immediately fell in love with san, he was such an amazing dancer and he captivated me right from the very beginning, to this day he’s still my bias in ateez uwu

xiao zhan → AND THEN, OCTOBER OF 2019 HAPPENS AND I WATCH CQL AND... i fall in love with xiao zhan, something i’d never expected would happen bc when i watched cql for the first time i wasn’t as invested in the story, but i really really really liked xiao zhan and one thing led to another and now here i am as a xfx

wang yibo → the thing is, i’ve known yibo since eoeo except i didn’t know cql yibo was uniq yibo (bc i’d forgotten his name) and when i looked it up i can tell you my jaw dropped to the floor bc holy shit????? also he is very silly and i love him loads ok

lee minho → ah, the man who has been my skz bias since 2018, not only is minho my bias i also kin him (there’s a lot of aspects of myself that i see in minho and vice versa) and he’s very comforting to me

bang chan → honestly, it was only a matter of time before i’d fall for bang chan, i knew the moment i got into skz again that i’d start biasing him and, well, here i am, double biasing chan & minho

WOMEN

this list is shorter bc i’ve in general always had less crushes on women than on men??? blame society forcing me into thinking i was straight for a LONG time

ariana grande → remember the 2011 layout of twitter?? where u could not only have an icon and a header, but also a background and ur twitter page was smack in the center of ur screen with the big ugly menu bar at the top??? yeah ariana grande was always my background for my l*rr* st*l*n*s*n layouts

perrie edwards → this was right around the time she was dating zayn & little mix was breaking out into the spotlight, yeah i just really loved her

andrea russett → okay so remember o2l?? andrea russett was kian’s girlfriend for a pretty long time and they always did videos together and i always thought she was super pretty

lily collins → maybe i don’t like clary in tmi all that much but i sure liked the way lily collins looked

alona tal → MY BISEXUAL AWAKENING, it’s only when i saw alona tal in spn that i realized, fuck i might be gay

park jihyo → i discovered twice (my 2nd jype group after day6) through the like ooh-ahh mv and red-haired jihyo really did something to my heart (i just rewatched it and god zombie bang chan is so mf cute)

kim jisoo → when bp made their square two comeback i was immediately smitten for red-haired jisoo in playing with fire, it’s also when i realized she was my bias out of the four members

shin ryujin → the reason that i have blue hair is partially bc of ryujin and her amazing intro in wannabe :D

xuan lu → her portrayal of jiang yanli was SO ON POINT and she’s just such a kindhearted wonderful person wow i want her hand in marriage

lee yoobin → god i’ve known dreamcatcher from back when they were still called minx and ever since i’ve always looked at dami that bit more than the rest, i was also able to see dreamcatcher live in october of 2019 and the whole experience was just so amazing !!

FICTIONAL CHARACTERS

there’s a whole lot more than just these 10 but i wanted to fit the evolution into one (1) slide as best as i could lmao

peter pan → this movie came out in 2003 (?) and he’s honestly the first fictional character i remember ever having a crush on

legolas → i was really doubting between placing haldir or legolas here but i only really got a vague haldir obsession when i was like 14

zuko → LOOK. ZUKO IN ATLA? HOT. ZUKO IN LOK? HOT EVEN IF HE’S AN OLD MAN.

will turner → man was annoying sometimes but i really liked him and his relationship with elizabeth was cute

jo harvelle → gosh i can’t believe she’s the only female character in here???? yeah she was one of my two spn faves and i’ll never forgive the screenwriters for the way they killed her off

castiel → does your fave ever get sent to super hell for being gay? no? well. mine did

kili → fili and kili’s storyline tore my heart out, spit on it, and then laughed straight in my face, KILI WAS LITERALLY MY FAVORITE DWARF

howl → i only watched this movie for the first time in 2020 so i kinda fucked up the tl cause i watched cql in 2019 but shh, anyways howl with his blonde hair was good looking but howl with his black hair just hits differently. i want a howl

lan jingyi → MY BABY BOY, TINIE LITTLE BABIE WHOMST I MUST PROTECT ok no but seriously this kid. i love him a lot

mu qing → BARK BARK. that’s all (that’s not all i love him a whole lot and it hurts me to see so many people misunderstand his character and only see the bad parts of him when they can forgive others for fucking up (eg. xie lian himself & feng xin) but bc mu qing doesn’t deal well with emotions suddenly he’s the bad guy??? i s2g if ppl are gonna do to him what they did to jiang cheng in the tgcf la i will RIOT)

#thanks for the tag hanyi my hands hurt now </3 #tag game

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do-not-eat-the-dove · 3 years

Text

I need to write this, I need to write this because I am so fucking angry. I am so, so fucking angry, and every problematic shipper I want you to read this. Read it, all the way through, because if you don’t then you are ignoring children you might have harmed.

Tw’s for: beastiality mention, sexual abuse mention, paedophilia mention, typical darkfic trigger warnings in essential

When I was nine, I moved into the Aphmau fandom. Earlier than that, I was an avid reader of Harry potter. Earlier than that, I was into stampy cat and iballisticsquid and skydoesminecraft. I have been in fandoms earlier than my body can remember, and I started in on wattpad when I was very, very young. Just writing, only writing. I had a vague understanding of what sex and smut was as a child, because of unmoderated youtube thumbnails. I ran into sexual themes online, because that is what a child does okay? I will admit that I knew about sex as a child if only barely.

As a kid in fandom, you don't know how to moderate things. As a literal fucking elementary schooler who doesn’t know how to differentiate “Their” “They’re” and “There”, you do not know the difference between right and wrong. You do not understand what an 18+ warning is, and you don’t know what the fuck a dead dove is and why anyone would want to eat it in the first place. You do not understand, and i think that this is something that problematic content creators expect of literal fucking children, and i also think that it is extremely irrational and condescending for you to do so.

When I was a bit older, maybe twelve/thirteen, I found ao3. I found twitter, tumblr, bnha and anime. I was excited because it was a community, so I became super involved as fast as I could. I had still not hit puberty yet. I hadn’t even learned the pythagorean theorem yet. I didn’t entirely understand variables and I had no clue that washing your face was basic hygiene. I am bringing this up to display to you that I. WAS. A. CHILD. A kid. Five years ago at this point I still had trouble jump-roping. I was a kid who had average decision-making skills for their age and who found the idea of boys gross, crushes were based on who was fastest in gym class.

I let go of tumblr because I couldn’t grasp what on earth it was supposed to be used for and how it was supposed to be used, I posted shitty depressed memes on reddit because I thought I was edgy. And then I got involved in fandom twitter.

Me, my friends, we recommended each other cute ship threads and discussed Notps and did “toxic fandom stuff” because we were children who still celebrated valentines day with sweet-tarts and holographic paper cards. I still knew jack shit about sex and relationships because as a child sex education is just “this is a penis, this is a vagina, this is how you don’t get pregnant, any questions?”

So when one day, i decide to type “BNHA” into the search bar of twitter, intent on finding cute things to share with my online friends and instead am greeted with a picture of a character raping another character, I don’t know exactly what to do.

Let me repeat that; I looked up JUST the word “BNHA”. Just that. Nothing else.

And I, a child, who has no decision making skills, clicks on the post. Because it makes me feel funny, and children are curious.

As a middle schooler. As a child who had the average physical and mental capacity to resist impulse, aka none, as someone who used Uwu and OwO unironically, who thought spelling “as” with a Z made me quirky and fun, discovered a main-tagged post of a character being nsfwed in a sexual assault.

From here, I explored. What you people don’t get is that is what children do. That is what children DO. And you, in all your wonderful wise ways, decide that it is on ME. On someone who had no understanding of what this was, to be the adult and say “I do not think this is right.” You, the thirty year old woman who maintags, are saying that to me, who was a twelve year old.

I think the most traumatic thing I read during that time was an aged-down character, who went from fifteen to five, being sexually abused and pimped out by his mother and forced to have sexual contact with dogs.

Today, I suffer from intense intrusive thoughts that I do not think I need to be diagnosed for, because constantly wondering if you’re going to be sexually assaulted by every single man you come in contact with, having to shoo away evil disgusting thoughts that have made you involuntarily gag and nearly vomit, having to deal with these awful things in my brain is proof enough. Today, I have such a deep-rooted fear of sex and men and relationships that despite me being entirely Heterosexual, wanting children in the future, having these ideas of a family, I feel incapable.

Today, I saw a fic saying that it was my own fault if I found their problematic fic, and today I raged for every child that is going to be messed up by people who choose to blameshift just because they want to use maintags.

As fandom spaces get younger, and the fan age range grows bigger I have noticed a distinct uptick in who is reading and consuming fan content on social media. I know eleven year olds, ten year olds, I have met a nine year old child who messaged like they were twenty. All of these children read fanfiction of characters that they adore, and click on fics that include those characters because they adore them.

I’m going to share another experience that I’ve had with sex and sexual abuse that was self-inflicted, but normalized by the content that I had consumed. As a child, a thirteen year old, I messaged adult men. I went on omegle text chat, I found forums for sexual roleplay, I talked to probably a dozen adults in sexual manners without them knowing or realizing. Even a few women, and I am completely certain this experience is going to scar me until the day that I fucking pass. It makes me feel empty inside, but you know what? Your fics normalized that for me. I read a tweet from an adult, someone much older than me, who talked about having gone into adult spaces as a child. They did the same thing as me. It is a trend, but while I recognize that I was too young to know what I was seeing, reading, hearing from people who were older than me and therefore authority figures, they blamed themself. And that is the most heartbreaking fucking thing.

When you maintag. When you use a main tag, that a child who does not know how to filter out scrolls down on, and they decide that this will be an okay thing for them to consume because adults know better, will you look them in the eyes and tell them the fear of things they don’t understand and haven’t even been introduced to yet is their fault? Will you tell them that ao3 is an adult site for adults and it’s their fault for being stupid enough to read it? Will you tell them that the images that will play in their minds for years until they’re desensitized and so so scared that they’re now a bad person because of it, will you tell them that it was their fault for clicking on it when they were seven, eight, nine?

Frankly, I do not give a shit about what you write. If it is in rpf and you still push it i will think you are a bad person, but other than that I could never care less. But I do care what you tag, because If you write the word bnha on twitter with an image of a young child's favorite character being sexually brutalised? If you maintag a fic where someone is starved till they are nearly dead, infantilised, sexually abused during all of it, and leave it out in the open on a site you know has children, in a fandom you know is targeted towards kids. If your tags leave a child open for attack, harm, mental scarring? I care, because I will not let another child be blamed for something they themselves did not fully understand the weight of.

#fandom #anti anti #problematic authors #problematic shipping #ao3 #archive of our own #tw #tumblr #fanfic #fandom space #I have never talked about these experiences with anyone but if there is a time to talk about it it is now.

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gra-sonas · 3 years

Note

Hey! I hate to ask this, you already do so much for us! But would you mind just a tiny recap of Vlamis’ live from last night? You don’t have to go into a ton of detail or anything, I just saw that it was a half hour long. I have a weird anxiety thing that keeps me from watching lives and stories for the most. Still haven’t even been able to work myself up to watching the vlamburn one as much as I’d love to! 🙁

Either way, thank you for everything!

Okay, nonnie. I went and watched the whole thing again and wrote you a detailed account of what’s been said. I’ll link the live again, then you can watch here if you want to. Or not. Up to you. 🤗 Hope this helps. 💕

youtube

Brushing his teeth and flossing for 3 minutes while talking.

800 new follower lately “where have you been before?”

“Do you do anything to your hair at night?” He adds Moroccan hair oil in the morning, nothing at night.

“What’s your favorite of the drop?” He hasn’t seen everything from the drop (like the COSMIC tie-dye) bc he’s in Santa Fe. He loves the COSMIC and MALEX embroidered things (“so subtle”) bc they are in Vlamburn’s handwriting, he loves the Manesqueeze shirt bc you can make Alex and Michael kiss by putting your wrists together. He *loves* the candle (there’s one burning on his bedside table), the silky PJs are great, but he can’t decide on just one favorite thing.

“How’s Jesa’s sanity?” She needs like 3 weeks of sleep. He explains, that while we *are* the Vlambase, the Vlambase merch company’s just Jesa and Vlamis. Jesa has a team, but all the day-to-day things, ideas, emails/customer service (Jesa), the newsletter (Vlamis). They hadn’t collaborated with anyone before Tyler, so working with him was a new experience.

One fan mentions how they wanted to buy stuff but couldn’t. Vlamis says that he’s been there, and when he wanted something in the past he couldn’t afford, he started putting away a Dollar a day.

“Thought on One Direction?” Vlamis is a Harry Styles guy. “Harry Styles’ swagger is next level!”

“What do you think about Russia? Will Vlambase merch be available here?” Talks a bit about how annoying things are with shipping companies, says they wanted to protect themselves for the holidays, and now that the Christmas rush is over, some shipping options have become available again.

“Who came up with MANESQUEEZE” He ponders about it, and settles on Jesa. It was Vlamis’s ides to put tiny Alex and tiny Michael on the sleeves so that they can kiss tho. And Tyler came up with the idea to put a “toupee” on his head (in a previous drop, the NEVER LOOK AWAY design had tiny Alex and tiny Michael on the sleeves, but poor Alex was bald) for the design.

Someone got a MALEX pin and the candle. He knows the pin sold out fast, and he feels bad about that. They want everyone to get everything they want, but it’s difficult to make proper calculations how well an item will sell. The pandemic made things even harder. Like the PJ sets. Normally, they would wait until the sale ends and see how many sets were actually ordered, but during the pandemic, stock listings have been changing dramatically from day to day, so they had to pre-order the PJs and robes to make sure they had a certain number at their disposal. He said that they “overshot” on a couple of things, but ultimately sales have been great, and he appreciates that.

“I’m excited to make the MANESQUEEZE doodles kiss bc I do that with the NEVER LOOK AWAY shirt” Vlamis jumps up and shows his closet that’s full of Vlambase merch items.

“Why am I here, it’s almost 3am” He mentions that he’s been staying up until 4 in the past couple of days, but he has to be on set in 7 or 8 hours.

“Hello, just wanted to let you know that I got a tattoo for you” Vlamis asks for a photo and to be tagged.

“Kyle the packer [Vlamis’s roomie KA, who works in the warehouse when a new drop is ready for shipping]” Vlamis says they’re working him to death.

“Please save this live” He doesn’t know whether he’ll save it. Thinks the one with Tyler was important, but since it’s just him, he doesn’t think it’s important.

“I followed Jesa, Jesa is the real MVP” Vlamis says that Jesa is “a beast, and best in the game”. Quickly explains who Jesa is, and that she’s his partner in the Vlambase merch company. He mentions that she recently called him with an idea for Valentine’s Day, and he was like “Jesa, we need to relax!” But she loved the idea. She’s a big fan of RNM and the characters (and Tyler). “Jesa’s amazing.”

“What about new Soli art [Soli’s the artist who created the Boys Will Be Boys art for a previous drop]?” Vlamis smiles. “What about new Soli art. I like that idea. 😏“

“Your house [in New Mexico] is so cute.” Vlamis says thank you and shows the ceiling of the house (which he likes best). “Santa Fe is dope!”

“I adore your teeth” *shows his teeth* Says he had to wear braces (some even adjustable)

“I could’ve used my birthday money to buy something but I forgot” 🤨 << Vlamis’s face. “How you you forget, man?”

“Back to Twitter after this live” He mentions that he’d just been on Twitter before the live.

He got retweeted by Mountain Dew and loves it.

“I’m from Australia and hope my merch arrives before winter” Vlamis says he hopes shipping will be fast.

“Love the Valentines” They’re not actually Valentines, hence they’re “Love Notes”. Vlamis considers doing them not just around Valentine’s Day.

“You catch any of the CW shows returning this month?” “Might have to” But he knows what he’ll be catching on the 12th. “Prodigal Son, baby!”

“Where did you get the Game Boys?” Those are his Game Boys. He has a Game Boy Advanced and a Game Boy Color.

“How do you feel about Forlex?” *scoffs* 😒 “Yeah”

“So excited for the robe!” Vlamis gets excited. “The robes and the PJs are so comfy!” Talks about how it’s a bit weird, bc they don’t make them themselves.

Several people mention that their closet looks like his closet bc of all the merch and he loves that.

“How do you feel about Forlex” *gets agitated* “Why are you asking me this? Don’t do that to me, alright?” *softer* “Don’t do that.”

“How are you doing?” He’s doing very well. Very relieved that eh sale went well. This drop was like 3-4 months of work, the night before the sale felt like an entire month, too. Jesa and Vlamis Facetimed for more than 5hrs. They set up the website, and that’s how the glitch with the GIVE ME MALEX OR GIVE ME DEATH shirts and poster happened. They made a mistake and only noticed after the website went live.

“Do you know when S3 will air?” No, he thought it might’ve been sooner, but apparently not.

“I love your poetry from the last drop so why no poems this time?” He writes poems when he’s inspired, he hasn’t written a poem in a while. He’s currently preparing to direct his first movie in June 2021, and he’s been very focused on that.

“The Meet & Greet day changed.” Filming schedule changed bc they had snow, the schedule’s changing constantly. He’ll be set all day tomorrow (well, today, Jan 11) from 8am until 8 or 9pm. Sometimes they might even wake up in the morning and learn that the schedule’s been changed.

“You could talk about nothing and we’d still watch.” He doesn’t want to talk about nothing, wonders if anyone has any questions about the sale.

“I’m so excited about the robe. I was going to buy more but I’m broke.” He says we should be responsible.

Someone’s still waiting about their Black Friday stuff, but he says it’s the shipping company, not them.

“Vlamentines" He *loves* that, thinks it’s a good pun.

“Gotta support Aurora.” Always. 🥰

“Jealous Guerin in S3?” You’ll see, you’ll see.

“I placed 3 orders, last one last night. Give me Malex or give me death.” He loves it. He also mentions, that they’re working hard on figuring out how to combine orders in the future so people don’t have to pay for shipping several times. They just can’t do that logistically at the moment.

“Real talk, how often do you check your DMs?” He says, that some people might’ve noticed that he occasionally likes random photos on people’s IG pages. When that happens, it’s a sign that he read someone’s DM. He feels bad when he checks his mentions with a delay, and people’s stories have already vanished after 24hours. He sometimes doesn’t get to checking DMs for a week.

“Will we ever get the original pic of the kiss recreation?” *smiles* *waggles his eyebrows* “Maybe in the morning”

“So happy the Trevor Project was chosen for this merch drop!” He’s very happy, too. According to him, it was a no-brainer. Tyler’s worked with them in the past, so it made even more sense. They wanted to make sure that Tyler felt very strongly about wherever they’d be donating.

People urge him to go to sleep. “You want me to go to bed?”

“Why is your merch not available in India?” *deep breath* “It should be, it’s ridiculous. Unbelievable.”

“Your poetry was awesome.” He appreciates the praise and promises to write some more poetry.

Someone asks whether the movie he’ll be directing in June will be a comedy, but he says it’s the opposite. He’s mentioned in the past that Aurora and him will both act in the movie, but apparently he forgot about that. He doesn’t want to jinx the movie and doesn’t know how much he should reveal just yet. Talks a bit about 5 Years Apart.

Someone mentions that it’s Jeanine’s birthday on January 14th.

“Do (or don?) a face mask, Vlamis.” He refuses. Mentions his friend and roommate Spencer Waldner, who makes face masks.

“If there’s leftover merch, will you do another sale?” He says that most things are actually sold out bc they use Blank Clo’s blanks and will only make what’s been ordered. They might try to restock some pins tho, bc they went so quickly.

“USPS are a joke” He defends them. “They’re a public service, they’re trying hard, guys.”

“You should do a Vlambase drop with the Real Vlamis [a.k.a. Jeanie]” He’s excited and thinks it’s a good idea and asks if anyone’d be interested.

Someone congratulates him on directing his first movie. He points out that he’s directed before (Making It, a 3-part web series, it’s on YouTube).

“Would you ever come to Australia Comic Con?” He’d love to. Mentions that he’s supposed to be in Paris in May for a convention, but he’s not sure whether that’s gonna happen considering how things are currently going with the pandemic.

Some more talk about 5 Years Apart.

Circles back to doing a merch drop with Jeanine. People like the idea.

“Please save this live.” After an IG update, things have changed and he doesn’t know how to do it. In the past he had the option to save it [for 24hrs], now he can only upload it to IGTV.

“$30 shipping to Australia hurts my soul but I did it anyway.” He appreciates that and mentions, that he lived in Australia for 6 months in the past.

“Sing some Bright Eyes” He thinks his singing would hurt people’s ears.

Jesa Joy pops up in the chat and urges him to go to bed.

“Jesa is yelling at you.” Vlamis says that Jesa’s a “yeller”, and that she has a tattoo that says “Don’t yell tho”. He admits that Jesa often yells for a good reason. “I need to be yelled at sometimes.”

Someone asks him to accept a request to join his live. He says he’s pretty tired.

He says hello to someone from Germany (not me btw :P) “What’s up, Germany ✌️”

More people ask him to sing, but he says he cannot sing. He says it’s not like a joke or him being modest, he straight up can’t sing and is a horrible singer.

“Will there be a sequel to 5 Years Apart?” Maybe a sequel called “10 Years Apart” (he’s joking and visibly tired)

“Should I buy anything before the sale ends?” Yes.

Jesa Joy’s from Michigan, and Vlamis’s grandma’s from Middlesborough, Kentucky.

“Is Tyler singing again?” He doesn’t know. “I hope so. Love that kid’s voice” (Tyler’s 3.5 years older than Vlamis :P)

He’s getting sleepy and will read a little bit before bed. Considers drinking some Mountain Dew.

“Do you take design ideas.” Sure. Sometimes he sees design ideas from people they’ve been working on for months, but he’s gonna “steal” an idea from someone, he’ll tell them. He’ll steal it, though.

“Are you still reading SAGA?” He read the first one and is half-way through the second. He’s currently reading a book called “My First Movie” by Stephen Lowenstein. “How cliché.” Aurora got it for him.

Purple Skittles are his favorite. Purple everything.

“Your girlfriend’s the best girlfriend.” She is, she really is.

Asks Jesa Joy whether he should go to bed now.Even though it’s late, he’s hungry. Considers eating something. People tell him to go to bed.

He asks “Should I get naked and put on the PJs?” *waggles eyebrows* “I’M KIDDING, YOU’RE SICK. YOU’RE ALL DISGUSTING.” xD

“Don’t eat!” He laughs.

Says goodbye and says that Jesa’s posted a surprise picture.

“Any advice for aspiring actors?” Tells them to make their own stuff bc no one’s gonna hire them. (He’s being sarcastic). “It’s dark, but it’s what you need to hear.”

“Okay, love you guys. Thank you again! It was our best sale yet. Means a lot to me. Means a lot to Tyler. Us doing so well might mean that Tyler will work with us again. So I really appreciate it. Okay, I love you all.”

Jesa promises to post the pic in 4 minutes. He’s excited. “See, I got her to do it! The picture is kind of ridiculous.”

*pretends to take off his shirt, stops halfway through* “Noooooo, noooooo, noooooo!”

*throws kiss* “Love you guys, good night.”

#michael vlamis #vlambase #mgv ig #mgv interviews #nonnie asks

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favoniuscodex · 3 years

Text

ask responses

ok so there’s like a quadrillion anti-k*eluc things in my inbox (like every time this topic comes up)

yea these all shit on k*eluc but if you like that ship idk why you’re here cw: death threat mention (NO ACTUAL THREATS), typical k*eluc bullshit

anon said: if we're talking about incest, I've seen some shit in this fandom k*eluc could not compare. I wish there was a way to block people/tags in ao3... everyday I roll my eyes so hard to go blind and never see some of the shit in ao3 again

i like... dont want to shame people for their interests because ultimately fanfiction is a way to get some like... weird shit outta your system without harming anyone but like... MAN... some of the fics i’ve seen make me wonder if the authors have ever gone outside and touched grass before,,, and im saying this as someone who fantasizes about 2d pixels for fun.

anon said: The thing about kaeluc, i heard from somewhere that some ppl tend to go overboard with the warnings.. true, that ship is disgusting, but to warning them with death threat/su*cide? They talk about toxicness of kaeluc but without realizing it, they themselves are toxic. I'm not defending kaeluc stans cuz i've had some bad experience with kaeluc stans too. But I wish they realized that block button exist.

i mean, yes. this is basic human decency (blocking people and not harassing them). the internet has always been pretty reactionary to things they don’t like and is pretty toxic as a whole. idc if you dont like something, death threats are never a viable solution. but imma be honest, i’ve never seen that happen when it comes to that ship and therefore i have no time nor energy to devote to yelling at people for it. not my place.

anon said: I've seen some people saying k*eluc was ok in eastern side of the fandom because it is a cultural difference kind of thing. I don't agree with this because like... that means eastern people want to fuck their siblings??? that's a stupid argument. I don't ship it bc it weirds me out but I also don't really care people shipping it since it's just fiction

though this doesn't mean that it's okay to ship them imo. I just try to stay away from conflict

yea as a white person this sounds like some bullshit lie some asian fetishizing white person made up to justify shipping two brothers. additionally diluc is clearly like... germanic/white ancestry so like... is this argument even still valid? anyways that argument just reeks of racism and holds 0 ground. it’s weird as fuck. also anon, its cute that you want to avoid conflict, i wish that was me. i think this ship is overall pretty nasty and i will take sides LMAO

anon said: “ayo how can we ruin a fandom” *red/blue ship* sounds an awful lot like kl*nce shippers 🦍💨

yea i wasnt even in that fandom and i heard about it which shows how bad it is,,,

always the red and blue shippers ong

anon said: Just a little snippet from what they said because I constantly have to go back to it and laugh about that because it doesn’t take more than a few secons to go on google an be like “are diluc and kaeya brother” to which the big fat answer will be “yes”"…kaeya has basically disowned himself…Either way it’s fine and not incest if that’s the issue!”How do you disown yourself-

d... disowning yourself means you no longer want contact with your family, it doesn’t change the fact that you once viewed them as family.... what the.... FMKLDSMFLMSD,,, that person you were arguing with is WEIRD

anon said: if people want to ship an ice/fire dynamic that badly why not ship chongyun and bennett or something. sighs. why do people have to be Like That

TRUE,,,, true,,,, this is 100% facts and lowkey thats a big brained ship nonnie

anon said: I've just been reading through the asks about a certain *cough* fire/ice *cough* ship and let me also add something. Everytime i search Genshin on Ao3 I have to make sure one of the excluded tags is said said ship so that it cuts down alot and I mean alot so I can see others but at the same time, some good fic has that tag, not really the focus but still has it, which saddens me because I try to avoid it as much as possible. Also any fics on twitter that talks about the individual (either the fire or ice) in said ship I tend to just "nope" and quickly scroll down(unless it's a het ship weirdly enough it's a little calmer) I just wanted some good fluff and someone just had to ruin the good fluff by arguing that the fire/ice ship is superior than the one in the fic. Like I just want GOOD FLUFF 😭 WHY DO YOU HAVE TO RUIN IT?!I FEEL NEUTRAL BACK THEN NOW I AM JUST ANNOYED. Also sorry for ranting peace 🕊️

i literally only look at ao3 at this point for zhongchi or xiaoven shit so i cannot relate but like gjldgkmldfkglg. k*eluc shippers are inescapable on twitter though i hate it. remember the time the genshin official account reblogged some k*eluc art JSKLD:FKFSMP:GDL i hate it here,

anon said: broke: shipping kaeluc

woke: shipping yourself with both of them and thus creating a love triangle full of angst and a lot of tension and competitiveness between them

bespoke: having them realise that they value each other as brothers more than having petty arguments over the same person they like and thus instead of reader becoming a s/o to one of them we become best friends with both of them and the gang's all happy

i can’t tell if this is oomf trying to convince me to alter the ending of inheritance gjkdsnjskdlskj or if it’s just a genuine big-brained idea. either way... i can get on this train of support. OR the reader picks one of them but the other moves on and lives a happy life because why spend time being hung up over reader when you could find someone else.

anon said: all this kael*c (🤢) talk reminded me of the first scene in which we see diluc (yk the one with collecting dvalin's tears with kaeya in the temple? and at the end diluc comes in and destroys the hydro abyss mage? yeah that one) so I went and rewatched it and hrueizkxbd i now remember why i am first and foremost a diluc simp

diluc was fine as fuck especially in the scene where he interrogates the abyss mage,,, ugh /chef’s kiss/. thank you fellow diluc simp.

#im gonna go to class and get even more k*eluc hate in my inbox #i am the new anti-k*eluc safe haven apparently #this happens every time i mention how much i hate the ship #but fr this was NINE ASKS at some point im gonna stop responding to them #//mail

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fanficparker · 3 years

Text

Small No-things | Tom x Haz one-shot

Pairing: Harrison Osterfield x Tom Holland

Word count: 2.8k words

Warnings: I am leaving this fic open-ended, Fluff and angst sprinkled here and there

Summary: Tom was bothered for not putting in as much efforts as Harrison into their friendship. But when Harrison reminds him of how he's all for him by being his assistant on the set of Spider-man Homecoming, Tom realises he wanted even more from his best-friend.

A/N: Hope this ends my writer slump.

Tom didn't like lying, however, he did lie a lot. In his defence— he just happens to struggle with expressing his feelings because how does anyone do that shit without feeling as vulnerable as a tortoise devoid of its shell?

"Tom, love, are you feeling well?" His mum asked from the other side of the phone.

"Very," He told her, smiling lightly though the words which may seem strange as she cannot see him. But the smile was not for her in the first place, it was for him. He liked telling himself that he was fine and it was almost working.

He hung up when the conversation got too forced, wishing her good night. And as soon as the beeping of the disconnecting tone fell into his ears, he kept the phone down and shoved the plastic wall aside, almost taking Harrison by surprise.

Harrison and Tom were sitting (half-lying down) in the luxury area of an already luxurious London to Atlanta flight. The interior was greyish and the furniture was brownish with cream-coloured curtains. Both of them were sitting beside each other but a removable opaque plastic wall standing between was separating them, which Tom just removed (sixth time in the seven hours, considering they didn't even set it up in the first three hours of the flight).

"Jesus, Tom! Learn to knock!" Harrison jolted, keeping a hand over his heart.

"Sorry!" Tom uttered, not feeling it though (Harrison was a drama queen anyway), "Just a matter of two hours." He gritted his teeth in excitement and nervousness (at least, he wasn't jumping on his seat).

Harrison chuckled, putting down the magazine he was holding. He kept his elbow on the make-shift table, squeezing his legs in his seat and leaning towards the brunette.

"I know. Exciting isn't it?" He said softly, looking up at the ceiling.

"And terrifying," Tom added quickly.

Harrison chuckled, again.

"It's going to be fine..." The blonde produced a full mouth yawn at the end part, removing his glasses and tossing them over the magazine.

Sleepyhead. Seeing that Tom turned the lamp off, sinking into his own seat, shutting his tired eyes.

He knows it's going to be fine. It... It's just that it doesn't feel fine. How does he even explain this?

...

"We can eat a burger. If it will make you feel better..." Harrison offered as the two boys dragged their luggage trolley across the airport.

Definitely, a burger can't make him feel better.

"I said I am fine," Tom repeated, sounding almost frustrated. Because wasn't this the thirteenth time, Harrison was asking him this question?

"You don't look fine though..." He defended in a soft voice.

But it just added to Tom's bubbling irritation.

First, the man who was supposed to pick them up at the airport hasn't arrived yet. Second, that person was telling him how he was just a few miles away for the last two hours and now he wasn't even picking up the call (if things couldn't get any worse). Third, Tom's feet were aching. Fourth, he wanted to sleep in a comfortable bed. Fifth, he didn't like people trying to pursue him into changing his mind and Harrison was doing exactly the same.

"Okay... But can you eat for me? I am really starving."

Tom stopped at his friend's words, leaving the trolley as his hands rest over his hips.

"Mate you got a completely different abdomen. You can eat for yourself!"

"Please..." Harrison did his stupid little pout, making Tom roll his eyes but it was all for vain. He knew well that his friend won't take no for an answer.

With a final huff, Tom relaxed his tensed shoulders, giving in.

"OK."

Soon, he found himself sitting at the counter of an open Burger joint inside the airport itself as he watched Harrison eat.

"Now why are you stealing my chips?"

Well, he wasn't just watching...

"Doesn't your stomach fill up when I eat?" Tom mocked, throwing another finger chip into his mouth and licking the salt off his fingertip.

"And I thought, my best mate wasn't any regular creep..." Harrison produced a gagging noise but then instantly stuffed his mouth with a big bite of the burger.

"Yeah, he is a PhD scholar." Tom rolled his eyes again, chewing on the chip.

That made Harrison laugh. He tried shutting his mouth tight, pressing a hand over his lips as his cheeks swelled, struggling to stop the food from falling out of his mouth.

Tom failed to contain his own grin that split his face. He joined Harrison in the meal as his own order arrived. He watched his phone ring off and away. For once he didn't care about reaching the hotel any earlier. They were fine here. He felt fine here. Didn't he?

...

"Whoa, this is huge!" Harrison dropped the bag on the floor with a thud, instantly rushing to take a look at the bathroom. He checked the other room and then the spare bathroom... Then the kitchen, the balcony and then rushed back to the living room which also served as the outer, larger bedroom, where Tom was still standing unmoved, arms folded across his chest.

"It's huge..." He repeated, letting the adjective trail off his lips.

Tom opened his mouth to say something but Harrison was quick to cut him off—

"Which room should I take? The inner one or the outer one?"

The brunette scrubbed a hand down his face, "The inner one because I seriously don't want your hundreds of shoe pairs invading our living area."

Harrison's brows quirked, "How-how do you know?"

"You posted it on Twitter." Tom shrugged.

"You don't even use Twitter!"

"Yes, and your fans did repost the video on Instagram tagging me."

"Well, then they are your fans. Traitors!" This time Harrison had his hands folded across his chest, dramatically swaying his head to the other side.

There was a pause.

"... Did you actually bring them all?" An amused smile formed on the corner of Tom's face as Harrison licked his lips.

Unnecessary drama... If it was something, the boys would have called it their personal quirk.

"All for you..." Harrison replied, smirking, maintaining the eye-contact with the other boy.

But it was too fatal. He gave up.

"Actually, no I didn't." He rolled his eyes this time.

The victorious smile reached Tom's ears but he was too tired to care. He could kill to sleep on that soft bed. So, he jumped up on the mattress, discarding his shoes and pressing his face against the silky fabric of the pillow.

"I am taking the outer room anyway." His voice came out muffled, not that it was unintelligible.

"Twat." Harrison whispered, twisting his mouth. He was anyway going to invade Tom's space and Tom knew it.

...

Tom won't call himself sad or melancholic. It was just that Harrison had so many... friends.

He had always been great at maintaining relationships even with the people he met in Year Five. But Tom really only had Harrison, despite all the enormous extra amount of people he knew because of Billy Eliot or The Impossible and now even the Marvel Universe. Even when Tom was meeting Jacob Batalon for the third time, it was Harrison who could crack up the conversation. And they were meeting for the first time!

Tom was visibly jealous of this. It wasn't the angry or hateful kind of jealous. It was a sad one. It made him feel as if he was putting in less amount of effort than Harrison. It made him feel as if he was not doing enough— dishonest, insecure and what not...

He felt stupid for feeling this. Yet, it didn't stop him from feeling it more than often. Not that Harrison would ever make him feel this way. He felt worse for knowing and yet feeling all the same.

"Hey, Holland?"

It was Jacob's voice that brought him back to reality.

"Mind if I steal your boyfriend? We are liking each other way too much." Jacob winked, looking at Tom and then at Harrison.

They were inside Jacob's trailer where Jacob was sitting on his chair and Harrison was standing beside him, leaning over his shoulder on his elbow. While Tom was standing opposite to them, basically out of the conversation. Jacob's statement did only one job— make him more anxious than before. Dread settled at the bottom of his stomach, his breathing got laboured and his heart almost stopped.

"We--we aren't boyfriends."

That made the two boys laugh more but Tom only got more confused and felt more left out. Harrison must have noticed because—

"Tis' just a joke. Relax." Harrison shook his head, looking directly at Tom.

Tom could best produce a spluttered laughter, ready to leave for the set.

"Jacob likes teasing. Which means we are gonna be shipped a lot from now on." Harrison giggled as they waited for Tom to be called for the scene. He was wearing that overly tight Spider-man suit, way too uncomfortable.

"... And that doesn't bother you?" He swirled his neck to look at his best-friend, wondering...

"Why would it bother me? It's just a joke. Normal between friends." Harrison shrugged his shoulders like it was...

Normal...

If Harrison is saying then it must be normal.

It has to be...

...

"That was sick! I totally didn't assume Laura to be 'the' prankster. Z was so not ready!" Harrison laughed as he emerged from his room, rubbing his wet hair with a towel. Tom hummed in response busy scrolling through his phone. Harrison tried to ignore it, not caring about whatever Tom was busy gazing into his phone but he could read the uncomfortable longing in his friend's brown eyes. His own laughter died in his throat as he sat beside Tom, giving him a side glare.

Three weeks they were together in this hotel suite which made Harrison more aware of Tom's expressions than any other time. And today, all he noticed was Tom's eyebrows furrowing more and more as he looked into the device. Harrison snatched it off his hands when he suspected him of—

"Hey what?!" Tom yelled, trying to take it away but Harrison was quick to raise it up in the air, using his height advantage. He looked into the screen.

— stalking Henry. He was scrolling through Henry's Instagram profile. Tom sunk into the cushions realising that he was caught red-handed. He watched the softness of Harrison's eyes vanishing replaced by something close to anger as he scrolled through his phone.

"We talked about this, right?" His voice came low as his line of sight shifted from the device to its owner. Tom didn't reply, rather looked to the other side, at the empty wall.

Harrison's nostrils flared. He tossed the iPhone to the side and stood up, pushing his glasses that had fallen to his nose tip back to his eyes.

"He's a piece of shit and you are still clinging onto him?" It was a statement disguised like a question to cloud the fact that Tom didn't have a choice than to accept that his ex-boyfriend was in fact a piece of shit. He was supposed to move on.

But does Harrison have any idea how difficult it was to move on? Does he has any idea how many times he looked at people, thinking he would fall in love with them but in a few days the truth would hit him hard on the chest?

He couldn't.

He can't.

At least, things with Henry were so much better. They lasted the longest. Two years were the longest he had been with someone and not felt drifting apart. Until...

Tom started, voice higher than it should be: "Just because you don't like him, that doesn't mean I---" But he was interrupted by a voice even louder.

"Of course I don't like him. I don't like arseholes!" There were mixed lines of anger and worry on Harrison's forehead. He paused, breathed from his mouth and added in a lot softer voice: "Don't you remember how it was with him?"

Until, he saw himself in the mirror. Until, he noticed the dullness in his eyes that used to glint with enthusiasm. He saw those dark circles, the loss of sleep, the loss of self-esteem.

He even stopped dancing, the thing that once meant everything to him. The thing that paved the way to everything he loves now. And he left it because Henry didn't like seeing him dance. Wear skirts and perform ballets. And he loved Henry so much that he stopped doing it.

No, he never loved Henry.

Henry was his weakness manifesting as a person, taking form in flesh and blood.

"I... I am just seeing his pictures, not that I am going back to him." Tom stated, his pride trying to overshadow his vulnerabilities.

Harrison again exhaled, sitting back on the sofa beside him.

"It's not just about physical things. It's also mental. We talked about it. You deserve so much better Tom and no one even close to Henry." He kept his palm over Tom's knee, looking him into his eyes, "Henry is your past. Gone. He doesn't even deserve a space in your memories."

Tom would have argued but he remembered that they have had this conversation in the past and that Harrison was right.

Henry told him what was good and bad for him. He decided everything for Tom and that's what Tom loved. He loved that he will no longer be responsible for any wrong decisions he ever made. That he would have someone else to blame for all his failures but he was so wrong.

It was his mistake. Considering the possibility was his mistake. Accepting Henry in his life was his mistake. Letting Henry make decisions for him was his mistake.

Henry tried to push his friends away from him. He did push all his friends away. But Harrison was the only one to push back. Push back even harder.

Harrison stayed with Tom no matter how much he pushed him away because Henry said Harrison was not right for him. Still, Harrison knocked at his door, asked about his day, told about his day, wished him New Year before anyone else.

Harrison even knocked at his door when Tom had completely given up, accepted that the gear of his life was no longer in his control. Harrison gave him his chest to keep his head on and cry. Harrison listened to him patiently and understood everything even when Tom was sure his words were just sobs, completely unintelligible.

And right now, he was again pushing Harrison away and Harrison was pushing back with a stronger force. Something hot and wet flashed through his eyes, collecting at the bottom of his eyelids. He wiped it off before it could fall down or before Harrison could notice.

His chest constricted imagining what if that tear had dropped. That it's been so many years after Harrison had those steel braces over his teeth removed or when Tom was no longer afraid of never growing taller and reaching Hollywood... And yet, Harrison would still give his chest for him to lay his head over and patiently hear his sobs and understand his distorted speech.

"Sorry. I shouldn't be so harsh on you..." Harrison apologised removing his hand from Tom's knee but the touch still lingered. He could still feel the warmth of the touch on his skin.

But Harrison was not harsh at all...

Tom smiled this time, looking into his best mate's blue eyes. "No, you are right. Henry is shit."

Harrison smiled too and got up again, stretching his arm is Tom's direction with his palm facing up. His hair fell on his forehead when he looked down at him, exactly like a bungee jumping rope.

"We should go out then. Refill that brain of yours with memories that will be worth memorising." He cheered.

But Tom knew there were moments worth memorising even in those times with Henry. All those moments he had his friend with him. The one who wore those metallic braces, complained about those acne on his forehead or how thin he was and joined gym at fifteen but then never went there the next day.

"Yes." Tom placed his hand above Harrison's. Harrison who no longer had those braces or those teen acne neither he chickens out of the gym training...

Tom did skip over a small detail. That little itch in his fingers when he noticed Harrison's curls falling over his forehead. The desire to touch them and push them back. He had clenched his fists momentarily until he unclenched them back to put his hand over Harrison's bigger ones. He pretended that that itch didn't exist.

Or that he liked holding his hand...

TAGLIST: @hazmyheart // @justasmisunderstoodasloki // @tommysparker // @just-a-littlebit-of-everything // @thenoddingbunny-blog // @calltothewild // @viagracex // @httplayer // @slytherin-chaser // @perspectiveparker // @catkeeperthetall // @god-knows-what-am-i-doing // @its-a-leap-of-faith-kid // @emmaloo21 // @tomxhazarchive

#tomxhaz #taz #torrison #tarrison #hollerfield #osterland #idk but i am not tagging it as individual tags #tom holland x harrison osterfield #friends to lovers #friends to lovers au

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brkfstgrrrls · 3 years

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@2187s LEFT A NIGHTMARE AFTER THE TONE: 🥝🥝🥝🥝🥝 !!!

@rapturcd - Where to start to describe a friend? Nox is a close online friend whom I’ve had the pleasure of following for the last few years now. We’ve been able to keep up with each other from blog to blog, and continued to do so when she revived this blog right here, a Bioshock oc. I’ll admit that when I saw her move here, I had no clue what the hell Bioshock was other than some video game. I’ve been graced with so many exciting details, passion has been poured into every message and post she makes upon the dash, it instantly made me a fan of this little franchise. Though the Bioshock rpc is small, Nox has found a way to make it her own. Her blog is filled with so much helpful information, and one look at her extremely well thought out, and detailed OC page will tell you all you need to know about this vast universe. With every OC she makes, it’s done with love and care, but something about Nicholas is truly special. Aside from being from one of the most interesting and unique fandoms, Nicholas was crafted with more detail than the gods could give any living being. Nox is also a plot driven writer, I know I am too so if that’s your thing, you’ll be glad to know not only is she a peach but she’s very fun to bounce ideas with! She helped me learn so much about Bioshock, it made plotting feel effortless and an overall thrill. If you don’t follow her, not only are you missing out, but I’ll personally be offended on her behalf.

@segadore - It’s been a few years now, and I have not been able to get Fawn off of my tail, damn you— I’M KIDDING, no but really, Fawn and I have been buddies for the last few years, and I started following her on her Steve Harrington blog. I’ve already gushed in the past about how much I love her Steve, so in the same way she’s so kindly embraced my OCs, I’d like to do the same with hers. Let’s start off with this: Fawn is the one person I see constantly and without a second thought embracing all writers, you could write an oc, canon muse from a different fandom, female oc, doesn’t matter– she will love them like her own. You speak with Fawn ooc, and you’ll feel at home, you’re never a bore nor bother. They’re one of the few people in this RPC I feel so genuinely safe around, and they make me feel like a valued writer even when I’m being ignored by others on the dash, I feel important, and it’s thanks to them. Fawn writes a very amazing muse named Mykah, from what can only be described as a non-existent fandom. I learned about Dead Like Me through her, and I’ve since been completely hooked on this concept and universe. Mykah is a very special, and well-thought out muse. He’s a soul collecting reaper from California, and he’s got so much wit, charm, and attitude, how could you not love the guy? He’s got a tough exterior, but he’s so funny as well, you can tell when you’re reading something Fawn wrote, they have such a unique tone, your eyes will be glued to the screen instantly as soon as you see a reply in your inbox. From the bottom of my heart, I hope we continue to write for years to come. If you want some fresh content you’ve never seen before, and perhaps one of the kindest friends, with the most goddamn creative mindset, please, go look at Fawn’s content. For the love of GOD go look.

@wyntered - You know how when your favorite musician or celebrity makes a post on Instagram or twitter, you go “Ah! There’s _____ again, classic ol’ _____, love them.” and you get all giddy in your seat, overwhelmed just by their presence even if it isn’t for you? That’s how I feel everytime I read each and everyone of Chantelle’s posts. I’ll be the first to admit that I don’t get to read all of my rp partners replies to other folks, sometimes I’m too busy, or honestly? I don’t feel like it. But the amount of effort and research they’ve put into this, how could I not? I love reading both her replies to myself and other people, I love reading her meta posts and headcanons, because I know it’ll not only be helpful but just wonderful. It’s also so nice to see how much care she’s put into writing such a complicated man like Bucky Barnes, her portrayal is uniquely her own, and she’s truly made sure to set a realistic example for others. I’ve learned so much, and it’s thanks to her. They’ve also been so gracious in writing with my own Marvel OC, Alice, and never act annoyed or bothered. That’s not something you often find with people who write popular canon muses, but it’s something I’ve been lucky enough to find with Chantelle. Do yourself a favor, buckle up, and get excited. Go and give her a follow, because I just know in my heart she’ll be more than happy to embrace you with open arms. Thanks for giving me the most iconic and kickass friendship for my daughter! It’s probably obvious to y’all by now that I love Chantelle’s work, so you know this message is genuine.

@capnsolo - I found out a few weeks ago that Kayla and I have been mutuals for years, and neither of us knew it. We’ll ignore that for now. I know Kayla as the most fantabulous Han Solo mun on the block, no really, she’s amazing. We found each other again because I writer princess Leia ( over on @/hopescorned ) and well… SCOUNDRESS! Together, we’ve managed to create our own little version of canon to their storyline, and we continue to develop it each time we speak. I’m not very good at articulating my thoughts, but my point is, Kayla is a very skilled, and creative woman. She’s smart, she knows how to use canon as a crutch, but doesn’t rely on it. She let’s her brain do the talking, and she knows how to collaborate well with others, and happens to be very open minded and flexible to other people’s muses. No matter how outlandish the idea might be for a story, Kayla will find a way to work with it. I’ve never seen someone capture Han’s tone so well, each time I read one of her replies, I can truly see and hear Harrison Ford acting each of the stories we create, out in my head. She has a way with her words, and she’s a true talent. Please, even if Star Wars isn’t your think, at least give her work a chance, it’ll be a pleasant surprise.

@nostlgic - Ash & I have been writing together since February, and the day we started speaking, they were one of the kindest souls I’ve been graced with speaking to. A passionate writer, you’ll be pleasured to see that their muse list is rather long, and diverse. Ash is the kind of writer that is always up for the challenge. You have an OC no one is interested? Cool, Ash is now interested in writing with them. You have a crazy rp idea you want to pursue? Ash is the first in line to give it a try. Whenever I write with Ash, I know it’s going to be a new and exciting adventure, each story is different from the next, and with each muse, they shift tones effortlessly; Stephen King would envy them. I made a post probably a month or two ago about how I wanted to write with an Edward Scissorhands, and within approximately 10 seconds, they volunteered to add him to her muse roster, and a mutual friend of ours even went to comment “I was going to tag Ash but it seems she’s already here” and why is that? That’s just the kind of person Ash is, and I truly love it. Go and peep her profile, because I can guarantee there’s at least one muse you’ll want to write with.

･ﾟﾟ･*:༅｡♡ SEND A 🥝 FOR A BLOG RECCOMENDATION

#𝙍𝘼𝙏𝙏𝙇𝙀 𝙏𝙃𝙀 𝙎𝙏𝘼𝙍𝙎 ! ✧ ( answered )#2187s #rapturcd #segadore #wyntered #capnsolo #nostlgic #[ whew. i had to rewrite and remake this post three fucking times ]#[ and now i have a headache. also super dehydrated. ]#[ sorry. smoll brain not enough thoughts nor a big enough vocabulary to describe- ]#[ -what i'm thinking n' trynta say. ]#[ nirvana is also playin' so ima wee bit distracted.. ]

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mulletcal · 4 years

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flowers, maybe daisies, might relieve the gloom. - an a.i blurb

a/n: i lowkey blame @sexgodashton for starting this whole mini series of boomer!ash things, but i also adore this because boomer!ash is soft as hell. and also a lil d*ddy but we don’t need to talk about that. title is from wait by sweeney todd bc i love it. alternative title was gonna be from L.G. FUAD by motion city soundtrack

word count:

warnings: ashton irwin being a thirst trapping, lemon stealing whore. i’m kidding it’s just a solo ash fic w no smut but some mild ash thirst trapping.

-----

‘ashtonirwin started a live video.’

Ashton didn’t often go live on Instagram, but this shelter in place order had left him ultimately bored - writing a song every day before noon, sure, but anything after that was a blur. Occasionally he would have interviews or live-streams with the band, but on days without that he was left alone with his thoughts, and his thoughts weren’t always the safest place to be; so talking to fans it was.

It was going well so far, simply asking fans how their quarantine was going - bringing some of them into the livestream so he could talk to some face to face. One girl in particular had caught his attention when they began to discuss hobbies she had picked up during the time she’d spent at home.

“Yeah, I’m learning to garden. I have a tomato plant that is just starting to sprout actual tomatoes, so that’s kind of exciting,” She had said, a nervous laugh escaping.

“Well, I would hope that your tomato plant is sprouting tomatoes, it would be a little concerning if it was growing something else,” Ashton replied with a chuckle, the girl giving a small shrug but still laughing along with him.

“You should look into it if you’ve got the room at your house, I bet it would feel rather rewarding to be able to cook something with your own fresh vegetables.”

“Would save me quite a bit of money too. Can I grow yeast? I’d like to learn how to make my own bread but here in L.A. you can’t find yeast anywhere.”

The conversation continued like that for a few minutes more, Ashton taking only a couple more fans into the livestream after that to talk to before he decided he should probably do something else productive with his day. Something like learning to garden.

It surprised Ashton the things you were able to order online during this time - soil being the main thing. He also read that saving coffee grounds would help, and he was excited at the idea of his insane coffee habit wouldn’t be completely useless. He ended up buying seeds for tomatoes, mint, sunflowers, lemongrass, and zucchini. The lemongrass and mint was specifically for Calum, realizing he would be able to dry the plants out once he had harvested them so he could make the man his very own tea.

When his package finally arrived, Ashton spread the packages out, sliding them across the table as though he was some card dealer in Las Vegas. Thinking the fans would find it amusing, he took a picture of the spread and added it to his story with the caption of ‘pick a card, any card…’. Maybe it would only be funny to him, but it did prompt a fire reaction from Michael.

It seemed as though the reaction from fans were positive though, them taking to Twitter to let him know their excitement about his new endeavour. That’s where his weekly livestreams began. He would show everyone the progress he was making with his plants, and just in general him chatting with fans. Ashton never really thought of how refreshing it could be to just talk to the fans, without the worry of time restrictions or anyone’s personal safety in the way; in fact, it left him rather inspired, loving their fans even more if it were at all possible.

A particularly warm day in L.A. left Ashton wondering if he should go out to the garden that day - but it was the day he would normally livestream, and he was excited to show what he was up to that day. Ashton wanted to plant another tomato plant, and also the lemons on his infamous tree had enough for him to make some lemonade so he was going to go through that as well.

Clad in some cut off jeans, or as Calum so affectionately called them his jorts, and a white tank top, he pulled up the live option on Instagram and waited for the people to begin to filter in before he started to speak.

“Hey guys! Just gonna wait for more of you to filter in before I actually head outside, but I thought that since you guys love my lemon tree so much, I’d make some lemonade. Fuck, I sound like a YouTuber. Is that gonna be my next career, is just YouTube tutorials on how to make shitty lemonade?” Ashton laughed to himself, slicing the lemon so he could juice it, ignoring the comments he saw about murdering his lemon children.

It didn’t take him long to make the lemonade, making mild conversation with the fans while he stirred in a little bit of sugar and some cheat mint he had ordered while waiting for his own to grow.

“Alright, now that I’m waiting for that to cool, probably best we go outside and check on those tomatoes, hm?”

It had been weird at first, talking to himself; but he quickly realized that he talked to himself anyways, even without the phone in front of him, so it couldn’t have been too weird for anyone who could overhear him.

“So I wanted to plant another tomato plant today, because everyone can use a friend right now, you know?” He looked into the camera, a smile spreading across his face when he saw the flood of cute little emojis that followed. “M’gonna be like the Bob Ross of gardening. No mistakes, only happy accidents or whatever it was he said.”

Ashton began to work away at his garden, building up a sweat in the process. It wasn’t until he leaned back, glancing at his phone did he see a text from Michael flash across the top.

‘Mate, Crystal said stop thirst trapping the fans.’

Ashton’s brow furrowed, unsure of what the text was saying, “Okay so I just got a text from Michael - what’s thirst trapping? And am I currently doing it?”

Of all the comments that followed, he noticed one that said ‘I mean… I’m not gonna say either way but take a look at yourself and get back to us’. Another one told him that it was when someone wears something in order to provoke risque texts, or gain attention from someone.

Ashton pouted, looking down at his appearance. He was kind of sweaty, but he didn’t think that the fans would mind him being covered in dirt and sweat, it’s not as though they had to smell him. Though, he would admit that he needed a shower.

“Well, since my tomato plant has been… planted next to its’ friend, and I’m apparently thirst trapping you all, I should probably go shower and clean up. Is me mentioning a shower thirst trapping as well?” Ashton rubbed his face over his hands, a small huff leaving his lips, “I don’t know… Fellow youths, tweet me and lemme know. Also, may hold a poll later on what to name these guys.” He flipped the camera around, struggling for a moment, to show the sunflowers that were starting to sprout, “M’thinking of naming one Denise. Just seems like a Denise.”

After his small speech was over, he ended the stream, grinning to himself. He hadn’t meant to show off his body in such a way, but it was funny to know that even with him hardly doing anything but be himself they still lost their shit.

Glancing around at his garden, he felt himself swell with a mild sense of pride. He was still a ways off from seeing any fruits of his labour (literally), but it made him feel good knowing he did something with his time at home, instead of slipping further into his mind which wasn’t always the kindest to him.

Ashton realized that when he was gardening, it was similar to songwriting in a way where all of his self doubts and fears went away and he could just pour himself into it - the reward being well worth the risk in the end.

Once his shower was done, he sat outside in his backyard, sipping his lemonade and enjoying the sunshine - realizing that having to stay home wasn’t all too bad, if it meant he could reset his mind, and do some small part to help how he could during that time.

tag list: @haikucal @talkfastromance4 @softbabiestan @boyfriend-cal @calum-uncrowned @wildflowerirwin @irwindoll @gosh-im-short @thesubtweeter @heavenisapeach @ridingcthood @loveroflrh @mantlereid @inlovehoodx @irwinkitten @n-ctarinenga @g-l-pierce @thecurlsofgod

#ashton irwin #ashton irwin blurb #ashton irwin fluff #ashton irwin fanfiction #5 seconds of summer fanfiction #boomer!ash

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