#but my body said no

[wishmemellon]

My artistic depictions of endometriosis

#I literally just want to sleep #but my body said no

[paradoxical-machine]

I want to sculpt but my hands are so so weak and they still hurt from mixing the colors last night :(

#paradoxical talking #i want to create #but my body said no #maybe tomorrow

[tbgkaru-woh]

The new generation leaders

#mdzs #wei wuxian #lan wangji #jiang cheng #jin zixuan #nie huaisang #mo dao zu shi #the untamed #my art #i redesigned them a bit again what gives!! #i always said i wasn't too fond of my jzx and nhs but i think i like these versions! #i really like nhs with shorter hair or hairdos #and jzx with straighter hair and these kind of jewleries look both rich but also humble which is exactly what i wanted to hit #jiang cheng would pop out more in full body ver but he's always kinda same-ish he just works #messy yllz wwx is the goat and i will not have him any other way thank you #also lwj being as simple and elegant and flowy as possible...yes please

[inkskinned]

something bad happened to you, and you died, and you came back wrong.

not wrong all the way. the little ways. you forget important dates, stopped going out with friends. it's harder to make you smile. you're apathetic towards things you used to love, afraid of places you used to go to cheer up. quieter. flinching. different.

you came back for love. you're still here for love. what pulled you back was a brightness so loud that even death couldn't outshout it. death heard the call and smiled at you and said okay. go home. somebody is waiting for you.

but you came back different. like lot's wife; you've turned into salt. you used to chirp through life in hops and skips; but now you lose skin just standing up. you have to move slower, skimming across this world without-touching-it. most things feel dull - until they're suddenly all-too-much. life, and being alive just rushes up and over you and you get hopelessly crushed.

you try to explain it to them: it is ugly, but this is what you are, now. the huge golden hoop of your halo now a little bronze ring. you are still watering your plants and wearing the same clothes. after all, you worked hard to come home. this life; so odd and off-color, now that you are wrong.

but they waited for you - it's just that they wanted the "you" that happened before this. the "you" that could sing in the show and hug people tight and look at a blade without breaking down to cry. the you with a smile in pictures. god, holyshit, it's like looking at a completely different person, isn't it. that other-you; the one they actually wanted.

you are the consolation prize. you are the body that forgot the ghost. you are the memory of the bad thing, and the death after; like you are wearing that memory as a banner. you are a fragment, an assembly. simulacrum. you don't make eye contact in mirrors, afraid the light will glance off and your true nature will flash back at you.

you hear them talk about it in their hushed, desperate whispers. sometimes they even admit it to your face; harsh and violent, acid thrown at christmas dinner. god, can you just fucking be normal again. you do not remember what normal is. you had to climb so far to get back here; you are far too exhausted. you want to open the glass door of your heart and show all the gears. can you help resolve whatever got messed up?

you try so, so hard. you came back for them. because you believed they would love you, even when you were so horribly broken. because you believed they would be patient. because you believed unconditional meant "without exception." you cannot do things the same way. you just get tired too quickly these days.

you want to put them on a couch and pour them the tea with hands that shake more than they remember. you want to line them up and draw them a map of where you have had to wander. you want to show every bruise in a backsplash; the little helpless ant of your soul carrying all that weight, over and over. you want to say: yes! it is different! but i did it for love!

you want to say: "i'm not the same, but i'm yours and i'm here. can that be enough?"

#this is very obviously about my battle with #ptsd #but i think it's also like a pretty apt metaphor for a lot of things like setting boundaries or going to therapy or choosing recovery #i was thinking about the 'comes back wrong' trope and i was like. oh no i have feelings about this bc i have mental illness #and once i stopped masking - i was WRONG. i was different #here's the good news: i am now INNUNDATED with love. fucking swimming in it. excelling at it. the people who stayed #learned my new self. my new different body and how i am different but i am trying. they have held me so tightly #and my life no longer feels quiet. it is not based in my suffering. it feels like i have been growing a tree in my chest #and now it is flowering. #it is so lovely to be surrounded by people who have said - oh! you cut off so many branches i was worried you weren't the same. but now... #... this is just a new you. and i love you. and i love that you're different and happy. #(but yeah also im nb so i was absolutely influenced by Trans things)

[exigencelost]

Somebody mentioned in a tag on one of my posts the scene where Marco Animorphs is showering after antmageddon and he finds an ant stuck to his hip by the pincers where it presumably was trying to bite him in half when he was an ant and then it died from him becoming very big very fast and I feel like that scene, and the scene where Cassie finds a sliver of a sentient person’s flesh between her teeth while she’s flossing and then flosses until her gums bleed, really deserve recognition in the literary canon. Applegate deserves an award. There should be a TV Trope named after whatever the fuck that is. Like fridge horror but diegetic. Bathroom horror. Your bedtime bathroom routine as an opportunity for personal confrontation with the violent detritus of the dead which lingers in and on your body even after you have ostensibly stripped yourself of weapons and healed over all your wounds.

#animorphs #applegate said what if you could transform your body entirely and literally rewrite your genetic code #but it was not enough to get away from the evidence of the terrible things you have asked your body to do #what then. wouldn't that be fucked up. #and the answer AS ALWAYS is yes katherine it would thank you for asking #if you screenshot my tags transcribe them so help me god

[andy-clutterbuck]

The Ones Who Live - 1x01 - Years

#i need to..... #Rick Grimes #* #rg #The Ones Who Live #EXCUSE ME #if i said you had a beautiful body would you hold it against me #i love arm #anyone remember those sticky hand things you'd get from grocery store quarter machines #that'd be my existence #just rest your head on a tiddy and have a think ya know #S O L I D #nice rack rick #so well proportioned and fit without being bulky i hate bulky #the mold broke #no it didn't you could make a mold #gonna invest in those kneeling pads people who garden a lot use #and stock in Halls or Ricola #until i can't walk tomorrow #until the neighbors call the cops

[im-totally-not-an-alien-2]

Danny, at 17, did not have the best love life. This is partially because two of his must haves in a partner are " Will protect me with their life" and "Will commit unspeakable acts of violence for me" or at least beat someone up for his honor.

Naturally, this doesn't always result in the most stable of partners.

His first girlfriend, Valerie, became an anti-hero and broke up with him for his safety.

He finally got with Sam in sophomore year only for the feds to come into class one day to arrest her. To his surprise, her crimes had nothing to do with ghosts but rather an incident where she went too far and committed a few acts of economic terrorism. Danny and Tucker never really learned the specifics of the crimes, and her parents hushed up as many news outlets as they could, so there wasn't much info to go around. All they knew was that she saved thousands of lives by doing it.

In the end, she was sentenced to eight years, and she broke up with him so that he wouldn't wait around for her to get out.

His third partner was a guy named David who was really sweet. Unfortunately, Danny got kidnapped one day by David's arch nemesis, who was some villain with a corny edge lord name. Yeah. David had become a a super hero after they started dating.

And if you guessed that he freaked out and dumped Danny for his own protection, you'd deserve a cookie.

Danny was noticing a pattern here. One that continued with everyone he dated. They always became some kind of hero before dumping him for his own protection, and it was infuriating. Sure, danny could defend himself, but he was never deep enough into the relationship to reveal his phantom half, and frankly, his hero career was something he left behind when he left Amity and destroyed the portals.

He met Tim at a skatepark after Tim fell off his board cause of some jerk speeding out in front of him on his own board, forcing Tim to stop or else hit the guy. The guy was unrepentant and Tim calmed him down (this did not stop him from melting the guys wheels with an ectoblast when no one was looking).

Tim then asked him to coffee. Danny, noticing how cute Tim was, agreed.

Danny was up front with his parents being mad scientists in Illinois. He always was with all the people he dated. It was better not to hide these kinds of things or worse, wait until you're already attached and afraid of losing them. So he always told potential partners as early as possible. Tim seemed a bit put off by this but was calmer about it than most, and they continued chatting.

Tim didn't seem like the type to turn to heroism or anti heroism so he felt safe on their later dates. It was only after he had known Tim for a while that he put the pieces together.

Tim was always covered in bruises that he hid with his clothes and make up, he had complained about batman over the phone when he thought danny couldn't hear, he was rich, he knew how to fight as revealed by his stances and footwork dispite trying to pretend he didn't, and lastly he held a lot of political power and influence being Bruce Wayne's son. Power he had no reservations using when it suited him or he was just feeling petty (that pettiness was part of why danny was falling for him harder than he thought he could)

No wonder Tim was so okay with his parents being rouges.

Tim was a villain!

At least Tim wouldn't leave him like all his exes. Danny doesn't think he could handle it if he did. Another good thing about this is now he can talk more freely about the more villainous and morally gray ideas and inventions when he was alone with Tim.

Tim didn't see anything wrong with Danny's idea to use something similar to cloning pods to make synthetic meats like rump roasts and steaks as a way to end world hunger and was eager to add to the conversation.

#dpxdc #prompts #fanfiction prompts #brain dead #deadtired #danny phantom #danny fenton #tim drake #red robin #yum #red robin dc #danny: i love my villian boyfriend #imagine when tim finds out #imagine when tims FRIENDS find out they'll never stop teasing him #batman #does danny assume the reast of the waynes are villians too? #danny tells Tim about Phantom after they had been dating for a few months and they've said thier first I Love Yous #sorry ive been gone for like a week ive been having A Time #stressed #some people find cloning immoral even if its just body parts so idk #tim is probably hiding danny from the bats in this lmao #i got a new phone #and it has spell check! can you tell? lmao

[swannsways]

🤸 Dominic Sessa as Angus Tully 🤸 – The Holdovers (2023)

#the holdovers #dominic sessa #angus tully #films watched #filmgifs #dailyflicks #moviegifs #my gifs #need to make a specific post about how natural and fascinating the way he moves and uses his body language #imagine landing your first acting role and serving this much #SO ICONIC #the cartwheel alone deserves an oscar nom are you kidding me #and to know that it was just him improvising and payne said why tf not

[symphonyofsilence]

What drives me even more insane about this scene is how you'd expect Gojo to imagine High school era! Geto in the crowd. Or at least not the cult leader, worst of all the curse users Geto Suguru. But no, it's the cult leader Geto. It's Geto as Gojo last remembered him. As Geto last was. Whatever choices Geto made, wherever his choices led him and them, however he was, whoever he was, traumas and messed up ideas and bad choices and ill reputations and scorns and all. Gojo wanted Geto Suguru there. Not any ideal version. Not any "what if" version. Not any "at some point in time before things went downhill" version. Not any "when your hands weren't stained with innocent blood" version. He knew very well what he wanted. And he wanted it all the same. He wanted Geto Suguru. However he was. He just wanted him to be there. He just wanted him to be.

And he didn't want him to help him, he didn't want him to fight with him even if they were strongest together and always fought together for a while. He just wanted him to be there in the crowd and cheer him on. He just wanted him to stand there and give him one of his sweet, heartwarming smiles that shaped his eyes into crescent moons. He just wanted him to be. Then even if Gojo had died in the end anyway, he would have been satisfied. It would have been worth it. Only if Geto was there.

#his love is so pure! it's so real! it drives me insane! #'this is pure love' playing in the background while Gojo said his last words to Geto before his death was a perfect choice! #people died because the strongest sorcerer alive didn't make any move against his batshit boyfriend for 10 years #then couldn't burn his body after he had to kill him. and then froze like a deer in spotlight after he saw his body in the subway #and the same thing is true for Geto his dead body literally came to life to protect Gojo #(the very first case among Kenjaku's many hosts during centuries) even after Gojo had killed him! and he bore no grievance towards Gojo #even in his last moment. to the point that even Nanako & Mimiko knew that Geto had no problem dying by Gojo's hands. #'Whether you come as a lover or an executioner I am ready to receive you.' #jjk #jujutsu kaisen #gojo satoru #satoru gojo #geto suguru #suguru geto #satosugu #gege akutami #my two cents

[brumleys-bones]

My therapist told me to post this lol

#chronic illness #chronic pain #chronic fatigue #rheumatoid arthritis #original comic #comic #my art #healing takes time #im learning to live with my body again and its hard #my therapist said other ppl could benefit frkm seeing this so yknow #take care of your body

[tekatonic]

huh, Princess Elise is looking a lil different today

#sonic the hedgehog #princess elise #sonic 06 #i love wings so much but this was... a lot ! i like how they turned out though #if you ever looked at my elise doodle dump you may have noticed her looking a bit weird in the bottom right corner #this is that but a bit more refined #i'll explain in another post probably but it's an AU where she gets this weird mutation from interacting with Sonic and co #why ? something about energy #like i said i'll explain another time #teka art #id in alt text #if this is triggering to anyone please ask to tag ? i'm not sure if this is considered body horror or not

[puppetmaster13u]

Prompt 274

You know what is fun? Baby Ghost Jason. You know what could be even more fun? Ghosts are Dragons. 

Jason? Aware of none of this. 

He was on comms, y’know listening and rolling his eyes at Dickwing, who used his real name, really Dick, he mocks. It’s just a stakeout, nothing new there, honestly boring when he could be blowing something up instead. It should have just been a stakeout. 

Yet there’s something suddenly there, something behind him. Something that causes his hair to stand on end and his comms to spark into static like some sort of horror movie. Something, something with clawed hands with corpse-pale skin tipped in black, stained or dead or something else, tilting his head up and up and up as he’s frozen. 

“A child, out here? Alone?” a voice crackles, hisses, hums, and purrs, somehow all at once, unnatural in its tone. He can’t move, he needs to move, he has to move, but it’s like the space around him has gone cold and dead, like he’s stuck in the Pits once more as claws hold his head and his vision blurs. “Sleep, child. Rest- we’ll be home soon.” 

#DCxDP #DPxDC #Prompts #Ghosts are Dragons #Halfa Jason #Not Ghost King Danny #Ancient of Space Danny #Jason: If I just got kidnapped by fae because Dick said my name I’m going to riot #Halfas have human-ish forms #Danny has four arms like Pandora & floating horns like Frostbite & same scale patterns as Clockwork #He’s cooing over the little Star Core Jason #Jordan & Ellie: Oh a new sibling? You give us sibling to tease? Yessss gooood #Pariah looking down at this scrap of a teen now forced into dragon form for his health: Ah yes another grandson #Jason has no clue what’s going on he’s very overwhelmed right now #Danny was not the one to nab Jason but it’s his child now look how cute #sun core dan #moon core ellie #space core danny #star core jason #a lil celestial body flock of dragons <3 #Jason is like a chonky amphiptere-esque dragon #long serpentine with feathered wings but also has legs #six chubby catterpillar-esque ones and long curved talons

[fumifooms]

Homegrown

Thistle and Delgal - Dungeon Meshi, Ryoko Kui

^ Fernando Pessoa / Killing Flies, Michael Dickman / A Brother Named Gethsemane, Natalie Diaz / Antigonick, Anne Carson v Oats We Sow, Gregory and the Hawk

#Dungeon meshi #spoilers #dungeon meshi manga spoilers #thistle #sissel #thistle dungeon meshi #web weaving #web weave #Just in case for sake of transparency: in the ‘what a relief everyone’s safe’ panel I erased a bit of dialogue he originally said #‘What a relief everyone’s BODY IS safe’ #But yk. Delusions angst. Dinner table Thistle imagery you are famous to me #delicious in dungeon #Umm go check out my Thistle & Falin fic on ao3 called Slivers maybe idk #Sometimes it does feel like Thistle has an age regression through the manga it’s interesting. Kui what were you cooking #I am a firm believer that Thistle’s an adult and that that doesn’t take anything away from his narrative tho. #He’s the older brother here & that’s the whole point. God dunmeshi family narratives I love youuu #Thistles are a weed… Idk the garden theme for him works great imo. Make that dungeoneum manage that kingdom like an ecosystem

[bakudekublogblog]

kacchan telling izuku that his body moved on his own is fucking crazy. like not only did kacchan remember izuku saying that all the way back from the sludge-villain incident but he’s also confirming that izuku’s crazy, boarder-line suicidal intensity is a two way street. it’s not just izuku who is insane about kacchan it’s mutual insanity. kacchan’s body moved on its own. he was helpless but to throw himself into the line of fire when he saw izuku was in danger. he didn’t think about it. he didn’t choose to do it. he didn’t have a choice. it was as if izuku was a piece of his own soul. katsuki instinctually needed to protect him above all else, even at the cost of his own life

#AND HE SAID IT OUT LOUD IN THE RAIN IN FRONT OF EVERYONE #bkdk #bakudeku #hey man just casually checking in uh I would die for you and not even think about it #you know how you almost kill yourself for me that’s like Mutual I guess idk what are we #do I tell my mom do I update my hinge profile #like izuku knows he’s weird about kacchan he knows he isn’t normal about him #and he ONLY threw himself into sludge villain incident when he saw it was kacchan. #and THEN his body moved on its own #and kacchan is the ONLY ONE who saw just how in danger izuku was #AND THEN HIS BODY MOVES ON ITS OWN #his body unlocks a new ability just to get to him faster #they’re just so deeply spiritually and physically connected and it’s MUTUAL

[elitadream]

What if this was Luigi's fight all along?

#Alternatively: what if Luigi finally snapped? #And what if he had the chance to save and protect Mario? #He would take it in a heartbeat. Danger and anxiety be damned. #There's nothing he wouldn't do for his big brother #Including facing his single greatest fear #And Mario knows this #bless them both #Also when I said I was going to bring my Bowser back as himself... This was the piece I was talking about! #I've had this scene in mind for a whole year omg #But could never seem to find a good opportunity to finish it #The recent talk about Luigi for the body swap concept was just what I needed #And now I finally get to share it with you all! #Luigi #Bowser #Mario #Fire Flower #power-up #angst #drama #fight #family #bravery #heroism #Super Mario Bros #fanart

[that-dumb-dinosaur]

"you're like a sister to me"

#EZRA AND SABINE SIBLINGS CANON #I HOPE #bc Sabine why were you longingly touching his face girl that was not very sibling of you #the way stress physically left my body when Ezra said that tho #ahsoka series #ahsoka show #ahsoka spoilers #sabine wren #ezra bridger #trexi pterodactyl screeches #star wars #ahsoka