#but our queen would act like this soz | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

alinaastarkov · 4 years

Note

In response to that slayin', hair flippin', finger snappin' answer you just published, would you be so kind as to list moments that reference how cruel Sansa is to Arya? (If you want!)

Thank you so much!!! When I say this ask made me scream with delight!!! I believe this is the answer you’re referring to (if not soz please tell me which it is) and I really had fun with it tbf 😂

I’m very happy to list some of these, because it is so often overlooked. In this instance, I will not be including moments that show how deeply it affects Arya, unless that is present in the same quote, because Arya’s self-esteem and mental health is affected by a number of things and people, and Sansa is only one of those things.

Without further ado, let’s get down to it:

She looked at Arya. “What did you think of Prince Joff, sister? He’s very gallant, don’t you think?” “Jon says he looks like a girl,” Arya said. Sansa sighed as she stitched. “Poor Jon,” she said. “He gets jealous because he’s a bastard.” “He’s our brother,” Arya said, much too loudly. - Arya I AGOT

This is more generic cruelty than specifically to Arya, but it does show how little she thinks of two of her siblings. Especially as she knows how close Jon and Arya are, and she chose to say it anyway, perhaps just to get a rise out of her (which is why I think Arya thought Sansa attracted Septa Mordane’s attention) or simply not caring about her feelings. Unclear, but we can see that Sansa calling Jon a bastard or half-brother (as she always does) is clearly hurtful to Arya who sees him as her brother, and both sisters acknowledge she is more like Jon than anyone else, so it’s hard not to see this affecting Arya negatively.

It wasn’t fair. Sansa had everything. Sansa was two years older; maybe by the time Arya had been born, there had been nothing left. Often it felt that way. Sansa could sew and dance and sing. She wrote poetry. She knew how to dress. She played the high harp and the bells. Worse, she was beautiful. Sansa had gotten their mother’s fine high cheekbones and the thick auburn hair of the Tullys. Arya took after their lord father. Her hair was a lusterless brown, and her face was long and solemn. Jeyne used to call her Arya Horseface, and neigh whenever she came near. It hurt that the one thing Arya could do better than her sister was ride a horse. Well, that and manage a household. Sansa had never had much of a head for figures. If she did marry Prince Joff, Arya hoped for his sake that he had a good steward.

Nymeria was waiting for her in the guardroom at the base of the stairs. She bounded to her feet as soon as she caught sight of Arya. Arya grinned. The wolf pup loved her, even if no one else did. - Arya I AGOT

I know I said I wouldn’t look at how it affects Arya, but this quote in particular is specifically about Sansa. The misogyny of the society is inherent in this statement, as it’s what is making Arya feel inferior, but we know Sansa lords this over her in this quote. Arya even mentions things she is better at, and still thinks negatively because that is all she can do well.

The only thing that scared her about today was Arya. Arya had a way of ruining everything. You never knew what she would do. - Sansa I AGOT

Sansa regarded her scrawny little sister in disbelief. “You can’t look for rubies, the princess is expecting us. The queen invited us both.” “I don’t care,” Arya said. “The wheelhouse doesn’t even have windows, you can’t see a thing.” “What could you want to see?” Sansa said, annoyed. She had been thrilled by the invitation, and her stupid sister was going to ruin everything, just as she’d feared. “It’s all just fields and farms and holdfasts.” “It is not,” Arya said stubbornly. “If you came with us sometimes, you’d see.” “I hate riding,” Sansa said fervently. “All it does is get you soiled and dusty and sore.” - Sansa I AGOT

Here we see how poorly Sansa thinks of Arya, and this is her own POV so there’s nothing to say about bias either. She also disparages one of the few things Arya thinks she can do well, and thinks of Arya as stupid and “ruining everything” which is not kind, especially when Arya’s presence would not affect her time with the Queen. Also interesting that she says this later on:

Be with you, Sansa thought, but she said, “Whatever you’d like to do, my prince.” Joffrey reflected a moment. “We could go riding.” “Oh, I love riding,” Sansa said. - Sansa I AGOT

Riding isn’t so bad as soon as anyone else wants to do it, huh?

One day she came back grinning her horsey grin, her hair all tangled and her clothes covered in mud, clutching a raggedy bunch of purple and green flowers for Father. Sansa kept hoping he would tell Arya to behave herself and act like the highborn lady she was supposed to be, but he never did, he only hugged her and thanked her for the flowers. That just made her worse.

Then it turned out the purple flowers were called poison kisses, and Arya got a rash on her arms. Sansa would have thought that might have taught her a lesson, but Arya laughed about it, and the next day she rubbed mud all over her arms like some ignorant bog woman just because her friend Mycah told her it would stop the itching. She had bruises on her arms and shoulders too, dark purple welts and faded green-and-yellow splotches; Sansa had seen them when her sister undressed for sleep. How she had gotten those only the seven gods knew. - Sansa I AGOT

Sansa knew all about the sorts of people Arya liked to talk to: squires and grooms and serving girls, old men and naked children, rough-spoken freeriders of uncertain birth. Arya would make friends with anybody. This Mycah was the worst; a butcher’s boy, thirteen and wild, he slept in the meat wagon and smelled of the slaughtering block. Just the sight of him was enough to make Sansa feel sick, but Arya seemed to prefer his company to hers. - Sansa I AGOT

Here we have an instance of Sansa thinking of Arya as “horsey”, so why are we trying to deny she called her that? She also looks down on all the people Arya makes friends with, which shows her classism and how low her opinion is of her sister and her sister’s friends.

Sansa couldn’t help but smile a little. The kennelmaster once told her that an animal takes after its master. She gave Lady a quick little hug. Lady licked her cheek. Sansa giggled. Arya heard and whirled around, glaring. “I don’t care what you say, I’m going out riding.” Her long horsey face got the stubborn look that meant she was going to do something willful. “Gods be true, Arya, sometimes you act like such a child,” Sansa said. “I’ll go by myself then. It will be ever so much nicer that way. Lady and I will eat all the lemon cakes and just have the best time without you.” - Sansa I AGOT

More of Sansa delighting in her sister’s misery. More of the “horsey” face. More Sansa telling her sister she isn’t wanted, which is something Arya is already deeply afraid of.

She was almost in tears. All she wanted was for things to be nice and pretty, the way they were in the songs. Why couldn’t Arya be sweet and delicate and kind, like Princess Myrcella? She would have liked a sister like that.

Sansa could never understand how two sisters, born only two years apart, could be so different. It would have been easier if Arya had been a bastard, like their half brother Jon. She even looked like Jon, with the long face and brown hair of the Starks, and nothing of their lady mother in her face or her coloring. And Jon’s mother had been common, or so people whispered. Once, when she was littler, Sansa had even asked Mother if perhaps there hadn’t been some mistake. Perhaps the grumkins had stolen her real sister. But Mother had only laughed and said no, Arya was her daughter and Sansa’s trueborn sister, blood of their blood. Sansa could not think why Mother would want to lie about it, so she supposed it had to be true. - Sansa I AGOT

Now, I’ve joked with my siblings about one or more of us being adopted, but I’ve never genuinely believed it, going so far as to ask my mum if it was true. This is worse, though. Sansa knows the kind of social ostracism and classism bastards are subjected to, and she genuinely wants that for her sister just to make life easier for her.

A bright bud of blood blossomed where his sword pressed into Mycah’s flesh, and a slow red line trickled down the boy’s cheek. “Stop it!” Arya screamed. She grabbed up her fallen stick. Sansa was afraid. “Arya, you stay out of this.” “I won’t hurt him … much,” Prince Joffrey told Arya, never taking his eyes off the butcher’s boy. Arya went for him. - Sansa I AGOT

Arya swung at the prince again, but this time Joffrey caught the blow on Lion’s Tooth and sent her broken stick flying from her hands. The back of his head was all bloody and his eyes were on fire. Sansa was shrieking, “No, no, stop it, stop it, both of you, you’re spoiling it,” but no one was listening. Arya scooped up a rock and hurled it at Joffrey’s head. She hit his horse instead, and the blood bay reared and went galloping off after Mycah. “Stop it, don’t, stop it!” Sansa screamed. Joffrey slashed at Arya with his sword, screaming obscenities, terrible words, filthy words. Arya darted back, frightened now, but Joffrey followed, hounding her toward the woods, backing her up against a tree. Sansa didn’t know what to do. She watched helplessly, almost blind from her tears. - Sansa I AGOT

Joffrey made a scared whimpery sound as he looked up at her. “No,” he said, “don’t hurt me. I’ll tell my mother.” “You leave him alone!” Sansa screamed at her sister. Arya whirled and heaved the sword into the air, putting her whole body into the throw. The blue steel flashed in the sun as the sword spun out over the river. It hit the water and vanished with a splash. Joffrey moaned. Arya ran off to her horse, Nymeria loping at her heels. After they had gone, Sansa went to Prince Joffrey. His eyes were closed in pain, his breath ragged. Sansa knelt beside him. “Joffrey,” she sobbed. “Oh, look what they did, look what they did. My poor prince. Don’t be afraid. I’ll ride to the holdfast and bring help for you.” - Sansa I AGOT

Now, I do not want to get into more crap about the Trident incident, but all of this is very telling, especially as it comes from Sansa’s POV so there is no bias. After watching Joffrey hurt an innocent boy, Sansa not only tells Arya to stay out of it and let the boy be mutilated, when Joffrey starts threatening her sister with a sword (remember, Arya only has a stick at best) she thinks that they are both ruining things. In this very dangerous and volatile situation where she should be defending her defenceless little sister, she not only blames them both, but is only annoyed because they are ruining her date. And then, she tells Arya to leave Joffrey alone. It’s pretty whack and I’d feel resentment too if I was Arya. And then, she abandons Arya and seemingly doesn’t care because she wants to be with Joffrey (remember that Arya goes missing for four fucking days) and opines about what they did to him, as Joffrey wasn’t the aggressor.

“They were not the only ones present,” Ned said. “Sansa, come here.” Ned had heard her version of the story the night Arya had vanished. He knew the truth. “Tell us what happened.” His eldest daughter stepped forward hesitantly. She was dressed in blue velvets trimmed with white, a silver chain around her neck. Her thick auburn hair had been brushed until it shone. She blinked at her sister, then at the young prince. “I don’t know,” she said tearfully, looking as though she wanted to bolt. “I don’t remember. Everything happened so fast, I didn’t see …” - Eddard III AGOT

We know she knows exactly what happened. This is a lie. Plain and simple. I don’t blame Sansa for this - we would probably all be her confronted with this intimidating situation - but that doesn’t make it any better for her sister.

That was when Sansa finally seemed to comprehend. Her eyes were frightened as they went to her father. “He doesn’t mean Lady, does he?” She saw the truth on his face. “No,” she said. “No, not Lady, Lady didn’t bite anybody, she’s good …” “Lady wasn’t there,” Arya shouted angrily. “You leave her alone!” “Stop them,” Sansa pleaded, “don’t let them do it, please, please, it wasn’t Lady, it was Nymeria, Arya did it, you can’t, it wasn’t Lady, don’t let them hurt Lady, I’ll make her be good, I promise, I promise …” She started to cry. - Eddard III AGOT

I feel for Sansa here, but she didn’t need to throw her sister under the bus, again.

The last fortnight of their journey had been a misery. Sansa blamed Arya and told her that it should have been Nymeria who died. And Arya was lost after she heard what had happened to her butcher’s boy. Sansa cried herself to sleep, Arya brooded silently all day long, and Eddard Stark dreamed of a frozen hell reserved for the Starks of Winterfell. - Eddard IV AGOT

Sansa’s eyes had grown wide as the plates. “A tourney,” she breathed. She was seated between Septa Mordane and Jeyne Poole, as far from Arya as she could get without drawing a reproach from Father. “Will we be permitted to go, Father?” - Arya II AGOT

“I don’t care about their stupid tourney,” Arya said. She knew Prince Joffrey would be there, and she hated Prince Joffrey. Sansa lifted her head. “It will be a splendid event. You shan’t be wanted.” Anger flashed across Father’s face. “Enough, Sansa. More of that and you will change my mind." - Arya II AGOT

So, she blames Arya for Lady when it wasn’t her fault (seemingly out loud to Arya’s face seeing as this is coming from Ned), distances herself from Arya and then insults her at breakfast. Me and my sister fight, but not like this.

That was when Arya missed her brothers most. She wanted to tease Bran and play with baby Rickon and have Robb smile at her. She wanted Jon to muss up her hair and call her “little sister” and finish her sentences with her. But all of them were gone. She had no one left but Sansa, and Sansa wouldn’t even talk to her unless Father made her. - Arya II AGOT

When Prince Joffrey seated himself to her right, she felt her throat tighten. He had not spoken a word to her since the awful thing had happened, and she had not dared to speak to him. At first she thought she hated him for what they’d done to Lady, but after Sansa had wept her eyes dry, she told herself that it had not been Joffrey’s doing, not truly. The queen had done it; she was the one to hate, her and Arya. Nothing bad would have happened except for Arya. - Sansa II AGOT

Again with the blaming when she is fully aware it was not her fault. I admire Sansa’s growth through the series. I enjoy reading her AFFC and TWOW chapters. But boy, did we truly start at the bottom.

She knew her father was still angry about that, but it wasn’t fair to blame Joff. That would be like blaming her for something that Arya had done. - Sansa III AGOT

Ironic, isn’t it?

“What did Gregor do?” Arya asked. “He burned down a holdfast and murdered a lot of people, women and children too.” Arya screwed up her face in a scowl. “Jaime Lannister murdered Jory and Heward and Wyl, and the Hound murdered Mycah. Somebody should have beheaded them.” “It’s not the same,” Sansa said. “The Hound is Joffrey’s sworn shield. Your butcher’s boy attacked the prince.” “Liar,” Arya said. Her hand clenched the blood orange so hard that red juice oozed between her fingers. “Go ahead, call me all the names you want,” Sansa said airily. “You won’t dare when I’m married to Joffrey. You’ll have to bow to me and call me Your Grace.” She shrieked as Arya flung the orange across the table. It caught her in the middle of the forehead with a wet squish and plopped down into her lap. “You have juice on your face, Your Grace,” Arya said. It was running down her nose and stinging her eyes. Sansa wiped it away with a napkin. When she saw what the fruit in her lap had done to her beautiful ivory silk dress, she shrieked again. “You’re horrible,” she screamed at her sister. “They should have killed you instead of Lady!” - Sansa III AGOT

Sansa is the aggressor here, telling blatant lies, and it’s a bit of an overreaction to a stain on a dress.

“Arya started it,” Sansa said quickly, anxious to have the first word. “She called me a liar and threw an orange at me and spoiled my dress, the ivory silk, the one Queen Cersei gave me when I was betrothed to Prince Joffrey. She hates that I’m going to marry the prince. She tries to spoil everything, Father, she can’t stand for anything to be beautiful or nice or splendid.” “Enough, Sansa.” Lord Eddard’s voice was sharp with impatience. Arya raised her eyes. “I’m sorry, Father. I was wrong and I beg my sweet sister’s forgiveness.” Sansa was so startled that for a moment she was speechless. Finally she found her voice. “What about my dress?” “Maybe … I could wash it,” Arya said doubtfully. “Washing won’t do any good,” Sansa said. “Not if you scrubbed all day and all night. The silk is ruined.” “Then I’ll … make you a new one,” Arya said. Sansa threw back her head in disdain. “You? You couldn’t sew a dress fit to clean the pigsties.” - Sansa III AGOT

The one time Arya tries to apologise and make amends, particularly by putting herself out there and offering to do something she hates to fix it, and Sansa says that.

“I didn’t do anything wrong,” Sansa pleaded with him. “I don’t want to go back.” She loved King’s Landing; the pageantry of the court, the high lords and ladies in their velvets and silks and gemstones, the great city with all its people. The tournament had been the most magical time of her whole life, and there was so much she had not seen yet, harvest feasts and masked balls and mummer shows. She could not bear the thought of losing it all. “Send Arya away, she started it, Father, I swear it. I’ll be good, you’ll see, just let me stay and I promise to be as fine and noble and courteous as the queen.” - Sansa III AGOT

“It won’t be so bad, Sansa,” Arya said. “We’re going to sail on a galley. It will be an adventure, and then we’ll be with Bran and Robb again, and Old Nan and Hodor and the rest.” She touched her on the arm. “Hodor!” Sansa yelled. “You ought to marry Hodor, you’re just like him, stupid and hairy and ugly!” She wrenched away from her sister’s hand, stormed into her bedchamber, and barred the door behind her. - Sansa III AGOT

Again with the unnecessary insults that prey on insecurities Arya already has. Especially seeing as Arya is trying to cheer her up.

“I’m not like Arya,” Sansa blurted. “She has the traitor’s blood, not me. I’m good, ask Septa Mordane, she’ll tell you, I only want to be Joffrey’s loyal and loving wife.” - Sansa IV AGOT

Sansa found herself thinking of Lady again. She could smell out falsehood, she could, but she was dead, father had killed her, on account of Arya. She drew the knife and held it before her with both hands. - Sansa II ACOK

There are about 3 Arya mentions in Sansa’s ACOK chapters, and one was negative. And this is all while she thinks Arya is dead.

Lommy had called her Lumpyhead, Sansa used horseface, and her father’s men once dubbed her Arya Underfoot, but she did not think any of those were the sort of name he wanted. - Arya IX ACOK

Sister. Sansa had once dreamt of having a sister like Margaery; beautiful and gentle, with all the world’s graces at her command. Arya had been entirely unsatisfactory as sisters went. - Sansa II ASOS

Again, she thinks Arya is dead, and this is still how she sees her.

Her name, she had to know her name. “Arya Underfoot. Your sister used to call you Arya Horseface.” “It was me made up that name. Her face was long and horsey. Mine isn’t. I was pretty.” - The Prince of Winterfell ADWD

I know Jeyne said she made up the name, and I know you’re all gonna say that means Sansa didn’t use it. But it doesn’t matter that she made it up, because that doesn’t mean Sansa never said it. Arya and Theon, who has no bias or reason to lie, admit that. It seems pretty clear to me.

There are one or two positive mentions of Arya in Sansa’s thoughts, but that’s not what this ask was about. I hope I answered you nonny and thank you for the kind words!!

EDIT: forgot to add the link at the start. fixed now!

#asoiaf #neve has mail #arya stark #the night wolf #again i've got people complaining i use the sansa tag even though my last answer was not negative at all #so i will not be tagging her here #i will on the next one though so bite me

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punkscowardschampions · 4 years

Text

Flat Whites & JJ

Mia: Mum can take four of us, so three of you are still going to need to find your way there, Dad's away on a Golf weekend 🤷 Grace: I'll ask if any of the fam can take the rest of us 🤞💜 Mia: Aw, thanks so much, babe Mia: so you're cool not coming with us then? Grace: there's like 1000s of them so 🤷🙄 someone'll will totally be talked or bribed into doing it 💅 Grace: oh yeah sure, it's like not even a problem, babes Mia: 😂😂😂 for real, got to have some upsides, yeah? Mia: Great 💗 Mia: the rest of you, you can only bring what you can hold on your laps, Dad took the range so we're in the sports, the boot is like non-existent 💁🙄 Grace: ugh IKR?! 😂😂😂 Grace: at least we can take SO MUCH of the stuff whoever's behind the wheel, you're so welcome huns Mia: Love a helpful queen Mia: Asia, are you even coming with us or are you going to ditch us for your boyfriend, again 💅 Asia: Of course I'm coming!!! Asia: Literally just got my hair done 👌👌✂ Asia: [and a million pics that nobody asked for] Jimmy: 😍😍😍😍😍 Grace: WOW! SO CUTE Mia: Yeah, but are you coming with us or coming with us like Maya's party where you left SO early with him instead of having a good time with your besties Ella: 😏🍵 Hollie: wasn't so early she didn't have a good time with ME tho! 💃💘 views to prove it Asia: UM like isn't it LAW that what happens at parties stays there?! 🤫🤫 Asia: & he doesn't even wanna come with soooooooo Jimmy: 💔 Ella: Oh, so we're your 2nd choice? 🤔🤔 Mia: 💔 is right, so rude Asia: ???!! Asia: not even Mia: We all heard you, you can't deny it Mia: at least own it, babe, omg Asia: you asked if he was coming?? Mia: Literally no one is concerned about him but you 😂 Mia: shame he's not, I might need your seat, actually Mia: but that's cool, yeah? seeing as you've got so many options Asia: ?????????? Mia: 🤫🤫 Grace: Why might you need her seat though? Spill on who you're trying to bring, thank you Mia: I'm not trying to make this convo all about me Mia: so cringe Mia: we're meant to be planning, thank you Jimmy: Go on, we're obvs all DYING to know Mia: Have to wait and 👀 Mia: be a nice surprise for you all Janis: How will we ever bear the suspense? Jimmy: there's only one of you who's getting mouth to mouth if you stop breathing, soz Janis: Things are looking up, Asia 🤞 Jimmy: I'm SO not going if Asia's not going, FYI Janis: 💔 Mia: There'll be room in whatever you're showing up in Mia: assuming she doesn't ditch you too, it's her thing rn Jimmy: put her on my lap ✔ you don't mind, do you, babe? Ella: 🤢 Jimmy: green's right Jimmy: no need to be jealous, El Ella: Don't ever call me that Jimmy: Babe 💔 come on Jimmy: this TENSION between us Ella: Repulsive and delusional, cute 🙄 Ella: Why are you even in this chat, though 👏 it's not nice to make fun of Asia, or helpful rn Jimmy: Bit rude to chuck me out of a chat she started Jimmy: but alright we can plan without her Jimmy: Mia* Mia: You aren't funny, new boy Jimmy: is that @ Asia's boyfriend or? Jimmy: he's got a name Janis: You aren't funny, babe Janis: what's to plan anyway, we have tents, we have lifts, sorted Hollie: Is Asia coming? Mia: Grace, can you please explain to your sister how much more there is left to do Mia: and Asia why are you like making people ask after you??? hello, answer a question, would you, silence ain't cute Grace: Janis does lowkey have a point, babes, it is chill Grace: she doesn't need or want to be involved in our outfit planning, obvs 😂😂 Asia: I LITERALLY SAID I'M COMING Ella: 🔉 Ella: Why are you shouting though Asia: why are you the volume police, Ells?? OH MY GOD Mia: Obviously Mia: but there's actually important stuff still to do, thanks, like who's getting the drink, for one Mia: Asia needs to calm down and find herself a seat, and a whole new tent if she's going to bring everyone down with her attitude??? Mia: don't take your relationship drama out on us tbh Jimmy: The unfunny dickhead with the unflattering fake ID, duh 👋 Jimmy: Love me again now, don't you? Mia: Don't get excited Mia: I want 2 bottles of vodka Jimmy: You gonna put me on a timeout, an' all? Cute Mia: El? Ella: Same Janis: You know it's a weekend Janis: you two don't need 4 bottles between you Janis: and you aren't even meant to have glass anyway Mia: You suddenly care about the rules? Mia: We'll pay you now, chill out 😂😂 Jimmy: I was waiting for the #flex Jimmy: can rest easy and count my 💰 now Mia: 🙄 you wanna pay for us Mia: literally none of us will be impressed Jimmy: and live off bread and water for the foreseeable? You're alright Jimmy: So poor, me, you just put the reminder out yourself Mia: 💔 Mia: like we're all SOOOO rich Jimmy: 🙄 Mia: like, bang on about it more, so not boring Mia: is anyone else going to order or are you just going to keep him waiting forever? Mia: what's wrong with you lots, like are you being shy Hollie: you bringing up Maya's party has me 🤔🤔🤔 maybe we should chill out with the 🍾🍾 idk Mia: You make those little videos sober, don't think you need to worry about being any more cringe, babe Mia: why are we going if to not have fun, come on now Hollie: WOW, ILY too babe Mia: it is what we 💗 about you Mia: so funny Hollie: 👌👌👌 Mia: OMG, this MOOD Mia: you're all stressing me out, actually over this Grace: Vodka is like totally fine for all of us, okay? Just get enough to have fun with, like Mia said Grace: without getting CRAZY like Hollie warned Grace: then we can all just move on Jimmy: 👍 Mia: Yeah, this is so much fun Mia: 🙄 Mia: I'm over this convo Jimmy: 💔 Mia: El, be ready in 15, okay? Grace: Is that everything? Mia: 🤷 Mia: Like I'm doing all the work for what? Mia: You wanna be boring, you'll have to work it out yourselves Grace: I'm literally asking so you don't have to do it all yourself, honey Mia: I said, I'm over it Mia: We're going shopping, you can all do what you want Grace: Ugh Grace: everyone stop Ella: The problem is you're doing nothing though? 💁 Grace: Excuse you? Ella: What? 😂 Grace: That's like the opposite of helping Grace: I'm trying to sort everything out Ella: 👌👌👌 Grace: Do you wanna talk to Asia rn? cos I don't think you appreciate how upset she is Grace: That's what I'm doing Ella: Such a saint 🙏 Ella: she's got nothing to be upset about, just like the rest of you, this is such a joke Grace: mhmmm Grace: we all know you wanna call the whole thing off, Ella Grace: but maybe the rest of us wanna go, so like ?? Don't be so rude Ella: That's why me and Mia are the only ones who have made any suggestions in this chat??? Ella: Okay Grace: 4 bottles of vodka isn't a suggestion, it's a shopping list Ella: We all know you can't handle your drink Ella: so why don't you ask for some cocktails in a can and get realistic about it Grace: 🙄🙄🙄 Mia: El, leave it Mia: this chat is so hormonal Grace: Call off your clone please, so over her Ella: Ha, now who's excused Ella: what was that about green? Grace: yeah cos I was so in favour before Grace: okay Grace: I literally don't care, count me out if this is how it's going to be the whole time Ella: The tantrums 😂 Ella: your sister finally invites you to something and this is how you act Grace: my sister isn't the one being a total bitch, you are Grace: eat something, you'll feel better Ella: Seen enough changing room meltdowns to know that's not worked for you, hun 😚 Mia: This is so toxic and we all know why Asia: I don't Mia: 🙄🙄🙄 Mia: God 😂 Mia: she speaks Hollie: stop shading her Mia: And another one Hollie: her and her bf will be done before the tents are set up, like hello? Hollie: it's not worth dragging her over Asia: 😱😱😱 Asia: Hollie! Mia: Wow Mia: it says so much about you that you only pipe up when things get bitchy Mia: both of you, where was this enthusiasm earlier? Damn, say how you really feel, Hols Hollie: I have to do my own dirty work 🤷 Hollie: if Ells had a twin too, I could sit back and get comfy too Mia: No one's asked you to be such a bitch Mia: this is why people don't fuck with you, so uncomfortable 😬 Hollie: yeah cos only you two are allowed, isn't it? Hollie: is it a boy you've invited? Mia: 😂 show me where Hollie: maybe where Ells is about to pull Gracie's weave out? Hollie: or when you uninvited Asia cos you're so salty that she has a bf Mia: Grace is trying to threaten she's not coming and Asia is clearly doing the same since no one uninvited her Mia: like, try to hide your drama behind us some more Mia: we're shopping for outfits, MY mum is driving us, I've paid for my drinks? Mia: sort your lives, honestly Hollie: my drama is you, you're being cringey bitches and I'm so done 👌 Asia: So I can come with you? Ella: Mime to a sad song, you'll feel better Ella: duh, Asia Hollie: I'll feel better when that boy you have a crush on, who I won't name to the entire chat cos I'm not that bitch, slides into my DMs again Hollie: thanks so much though, Ells Ella: It's tragic you think that means anything Ella: as if you've ever made it to the tent being put up Hollie: It's sooooooo funny that you think that's going to get to me Hollie: I don't want a 💍 and you know it Ella: that's lucky Ella: don't think they do engagement rings in man-sized Jimmy: Well I'm fucked then Jimmy: soz babe, the proposal's cancelled Mia: Are you two legit still here? Mia: That's even more pathetic than you three, you're in luck Jimmy: waiting on my shopping invite, no manners, you Mia: You've got your list Jimmy: But how can I join the cult if you don't tell me the dress code Jimmy: Kool-Aid's on order, like Mia: 🦗🦗 Mia: less reaction than your fake proposal bombshell, I am SO sorry, sweetie Jimmy: I proper felt that, you should go to drama school Ella: and Brits are meant to be decent at sarcasm Ella: try harder, new boy Jimmy: What's sarcasm? Please tell us, attack dog #1 Ella: Get Grace to, seeing as she's such a martyr Ella: Asia's stopped blubbing now Grace: Get over yourself and my name out of your mouth, hun Grace: your changing room meltdown atm isn't my problem Ella: OMG, a real-life 👼 Ella: deigning to talk to us commoners for a sec Ella: you wanna talk about names in your mouth, be sure to tell Asia what you said about her after she left Maya's, k 😘 Grace: Jesus loves everyone babes, even you Mia: 💁 so true Mia: make sure your hands are clean before you start pointing the finger, Gracie Grace: Oh please, I was drunk after I left that party cos OBVS I can NEVER handle my drink, DUH Grace: Do we wanna take a moment to talk about what you both said about my sister and her boyfriend after they invited us to this festival or no? Mia: Try on another excuse, see if that one fits Ella: 😏 Ella: doubt it Grace: we for sure don't wanna take any moments to discuss body image, unless of course you really would like to leave the chat and focus on your ootds Ella: 🐢🌵💚 Asia: ??? Asia: what does that even mean?? Ella: She knows Ella: Asia are you at home? Asia: not my home Asia: why? Ella: to pick you up Ella: you still need to get stuff too, right? Asia: OH Asia: I'll get him to drop me off rn Ella: 🙌 we'll wait 💗 Asia: 👌💗 Mia: We'll do nails and tan after, Dad's paying Asia: I can't tan too dark tho it'll clash with 💇 Mia: 'course, babe, that'd be so cringe Mia: you'll look amazing 😘 Asia: 💗💗💗 Mia: k, toodles 👋 Asia: SO excited Ella: Us too 💃🍾 Hollie: 🙄🙄🙄 Ella: Your negative energy is really draining Ella: speak up if you've got a problem, Hols, maybe we can help Hollie: I just can't remember stepping into a time machine and popping out again when we were like 12 tbh Ella: Your backne is acting up again? Ella: Worst timing, the sun will do it wonders though, don't worry Hollie: 😂 Ella: See, that's more like it Ella: positivity, ladies Hollie: Mia, are you really doing this? Mia: Doing what, babe? Hollie: you know Hollie: 🥶🥶🥶🥶 Mia: I really don't, though Mia: sorry 😕 Mia: DM me if you don't want to say it in front of them, yeah Hollie: okay Hollie: be really cool if you could swat Ells off your shoulder first though Hollie: just saying Mia: Why are you being like, jealous Mia: so weird Mia: we're all friends, 'cos we're not 12 😂 Hollie: check your inbox Hollie: you won't be BFFs with her when you read that Ella: Beg an invite harder Hollie: you'll be begging to keep yours, babes Hollie: gonna have to do your own tan, uh oh Ella: You'd know all about that Ella: 🍊🍪😷 Asia: OMG yay! I understood that time Ella: 😂 it'd be hard to miss, right babe Ella: bless Asia: 😂😂

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annoyedfanfiction · 5 years

Text

Arthur Curry x Kryptonian!Amazon!reader (2)

Aquaman spoilers. I forgot to warn for justice league spoilers but hey, it’s too late now sorry guys.

“No eternal napping,” Arthur interrupted, offering a hand to you, where you had flopped against the wall. “You and I have some words to exchange with a certain two queens, I believe.” You groaned, flopping your head back against the crumbling wall, but taking his hand anyway. “Remember the part about literally starting an entire war?” you questioned, as you all loaded yourselves into the jet. “A war between Atlanta and Themyscira could end both civilisations,” Diana pointed out, instantly. “Neither side could win a conflict like that without devastating losses, and it would require us to take sides.” “Atlanta will not go to war against Themyscira,” Arthur promised, calmly. “I will not allow it.” “Because your half-brother is well known for listening to you,” you commented, sarcastically. Arthur rolled his eyes, and leaned back, smirking.

“I am king now.” Every head turned to him. “Dude, like, actual King? Were we meant to be calling you “Your Majesty”?” Barry quizzed, immediately. “Have we all technically committed treason against the Atlantean throne?” “No! No!” Arthur panicked, grabbing the boy by the shoulders as he freaked out. “I don’t want to be called your Majesty, that’s the most uptight fucking thing. It’s all fine.” “So, what, Orm is dead?” you queried, furrowing your brows. “That doesn’t sound like you.” “He was imprisoned, briefly, but now he is acting as...co-regent and advisor,” Arthur admitted, scratching the back of his neck. “So you’re king in title, but you let your bro do it?” Barry clarified, scrunching up his face, “Why? You rule an entire kingdom but you let someone else do it for you?” “The amount of time, energy, and pandering to beuro-aristocrats that goes into leading an army, let alone a kingdom, is unholy, Barry,” you answered, closing your eyes as though the memory physically pained you. Diana rolled her eyes at your dramatics, as Arthur agreed. “Orm enjoys that bullshit,” he chuckled, easily. “I do not. He and Mera report back on everything, I can make and reverse any major decisions. I attend council once a month, and hold court for the people once a fortnight.”

“Princess Mera is your regent?” The question tasted bitter on your tongue, and you tried to ignore the pang of jealousy. “Regent, friend, and ally,” Arthur answered, looking over you in amusement. “She and Vulko helped me take the throne, and we grew close.” “Then there is no need for a meeting with Hippolyta and Atlanna,” you smiled, as though it relieved you. “Princess Mera will be a popular choice for Queen of Atlanta.” “Did you miss the part about ‘friend’?” Arthur sassed back, raising an eyebrow. “Not just any friend becomes regent,” Diana answered for you, as you glowered back at the smirking king. “We are good friends, and she is a wise diplomatic instalment as regent,” he responded, calmly, “I needed someone I could truly trust to work with Orm. I think you would like her, she’s got a similar...fire.” “Last time I saw Mera, I hadn’t even met you, and she was just a baby in Vulko’s arms,” you smiled, thoughtfully. “I should like to see the woman she has grown into.” The jet swept to a stop in Bruce’s familiarly dim Bat-Cave, and you all stood as the doors opened.

“Alfred!” you exclaimed, immediately, as the grey-haired man stood by the door. He looked up at you, in surprise, and his face split into a smile. “Miss (Y/L/N),” he greeted, politely, as you pulled him into a hug. “Come, Alfred, death has not had such an effect that I do not remember our friendship,” you assured him, feeling him relax into the hug. “It is a relief to see you back, (Y/N),” he admitted, smiling. “I don’t suppose death caused a forgiveness for Bruce’s...lapse of judgement?” “No, but I think he has suffered enough for it,” you murmured, eyeing Bruce off as he descended from the jet. “I will let it rest.” You felt Alfred breathe a sigh of relief, and then heard his groan of exasperation as footsteps clattered into the cave. “B!” You recognised Dick Grayson’s worried voice, as the mob of children, black-haired boys surrounding Steph and Cass, swamped into sight. “Father, I am pleased to see you home safely,” Damian Wayne intoned, approaching placidly behind his brothers. “Wait, wait, is that–(Y/N)!” Jason burst out of the huddle, and sprang onto you. “I thought you were dead! And then Bruce was bringing back Clark and I was all, what about you, and he was like, we can only do one, and I was all, fuck you then.” You chuckled, embracing the tall boy/young-man in front of you. “I appreciate the concern, Hubcaps.” You reached up and ruffled his hair, with a grin. “It seems the gods weren’t the happiest about ~the end of woooorlds~. Have you met Victor? He’s just as done with the world as you are, and I need to introduce him and Barry to Tim.” “I heard my name.” Tim popped up beside you, dark circles under his eyes, but hyper-vigilant as always. “Barry! Victor!” You waved the two boys over from where they had been standing, awkwardly, in the midst of the scene, beside Arthur, as Diana conversed with Alfred and you and Bruce waded through the sea of children. “Barry, Victor, this is Jason Todd, and Tim Drake. Jason, Tim, Barry Allen and Victor...” “Stone,” Victor offered, a little stiffly. “Victor Stone.” “Woah, you were meant to be dead,” Jason smiled, warmly. “Welcome to the resurrected club.”

so i definitely changed the timeline a bit let’s pretend Aquaman happened before Justice League and you can get back to Themyscira bc it is convenient for meeeeee soz

also sorry it’s short and reasonably actual-event-less but there is more to come i promise

@affabletimelady you wanted to be tagged? edit: also @zzeacat and @heckin-kat

#aquaman x reader #arthur curry x reader #aquaman #justice league

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thebrothershardy · 6 years

Note

Can we do the opposite too? Most despised suspect in each game? (:

YES

secrets can kill: everybody here is EQUALLY ANNOYING

stay tuned for danger: and everybody here is as two-dimensional as their character models

message in a haunted mansion: ah, good ol’ louis chandler, the man with the voice like caramelized poison.

treasure in the royal tower: what still baffles to me to this day is that when i was younger i genuinely liked giant pissbaby jacques. NOT ANYMORE, PAL

the final scene: soz joseph, but i have NO SYMPATHY for your sad lil backstory. also, LOL at the game for trying to keep us from hating him by adding “at least he was kind and courteous to maya the whole time he kidnapped her” ????? he was going to kill her??? for a theater???? and even when it was obvious that the demolition was gonna happen no matter what he still stuck her in a fish tank and refused to budge?? NO

secret of the scarlet hand: i cannot forgive anyone with hands like taylor sinclar

ghost dogs of moon lake: red knott strolls around SALLY’S PROPERTY acting like he has ANY RIGHT TO BE THERE and BUILD HIMSELF A TREEHOUSE and then has the A U D A C I T Y to berate nancy for making noise even though he is T R E S P A S S I N G

the haunted carousel: joy trent, a disappointment to her name and to us all. she also has the morale of a defeated slug. if she doesn’t figure out miles’ riddle in a matter of seconds she thinks it’s HOPELESS. GIVE ME SOMETHING TO WORK WITH HERE, HER INTERACTIVE

danger on deception island: okay, yes, he is amusing, but how can anyone in this current american political climate actually do anything but flinch when holt scotto starts talking

secret of shadow ranch: there is no one unlikable in this game. i mean, even shorty, who is obviously Not The Best Person, has some truly stellar lines

curse of blackmoor manor: I LOVE EVERYONE HERE TOO

secret of the old clock: you know, i’ve wondered for many years if jane’s unwillingness to help us sew that dress was an intended culprit giveaway or just nancy drew characters having their useful penchant for being as unhelpful as possible so nancy can be forced to do ALL THE CHORES. that being said, there is just nothing likable about a woman stupid enough to explode a kitchen of a place she is trying to sell for as much money as possible. JANE, all the way

last train to blue moon canyon: I LOVE EVERYONE AGAIN

danger by design: everyone in this game is just Existing, taking up absolutely no space in my heart/brain. i’m tempted to say dieter is the most annoying because he has the audacity to try to make us sympathize with him because he is in love with a woman who is not interested in him. much sad. very hurt.

creature of kapu cave: is there a single redeeming quality about quigley??? also WHERE DOES NANCY’S FIERCENESS GO when she’s stuttering out answers while quigley grills her on where her clipboard is and HOW THIS IS A REAL SHAKY START TO THIS UNPAID WORK SHE’S DOING FOR HER

white wolf of icicle creek: there is just not enough understanding in my bones to have the patience for trap-happy gun-wielding ollie randall knocking down chantal’s door for a raise

legend of the crystal skull: i like the whole cast here!

phantom of venice: colin baxter

haunting of castle malloy: BYE, KIT

ransom of the seven ships: of all the brilliant villains we had at our disposal, and we got….. dwayne powers (with frank’s voice to boot)

warnings at waverly academy: am i SUPPOSED to like rachel and/or kim after they shovel all their homework onto us and yet still barely give us the time of day?????

trail of the twister: everyone is great! although man, do i wish debbie would stop yelling at us to HAVE FUN all the time

shadow at the water’s edge: listen i know everyone likes her and yes, she has some great dialogue, but i find yumi more annoying than anything else

the captive curse: everyone is great, no complaints here

alibi in ashes: toni scallari is the only person in this FANTASTIC ensemble to dislike, and even then, i kinda can’t because of how unbelievably REALISTIC she is

tomb of the lost queen: lily is just too obnoxious for me to enjoy her. also, it’s so painfully obvious that she and lukas from cap share a voice actor that it’s hard for me to even get through her dialogue

the deadly device: listen, i get that he’s super clenched up in his man pain but gray could be a LITTLE less terrible. he’s probably still better than victor, though.

ghost of thornton hall: i really WANT to like jessalyn, especially since we get such a build-up to her reveal, but damn girl, weren’t there easier ways to get to the bottom of your mom’s sordid past than kidnapping yourself, dressing up as your dead aunt, and torturing your entire family into thinking you were dead/held at gunpoint/being murdered somewhere? it also doesn’t help that she goes ape shit on nancy if nancy doesn’t immediately went to help her despite her very sketchy situation. or that she somehow finds it appropriate to complain about her family being a “hot mess” because they’re…… worried about her????

the silent spy: nope. nope, y’all, NOPE. everyone is stellar, a+, 10/10

the shattered medallion: if there is anybody out there who genuinely likes kiri…. gimme your location….. i just want to talk……….

labyrinth of lies: i really do like everyone, but if melina could’ve been a little less hot/cold with us, that would’ve been nice??

sea of darkness: okay, so i really do like everyone in this game, but there is one person i like just a liiiittle less. and y’know, i can already feel the backlash from this, but i really wish dagny would’ve been a bit less of a grumpy, brooding loner. i just remember way too many kids in high school who acted JUST LIKE THIS because they thought it was uber cool. i probably would’ve had more sympathy for this attitude if we would’ve gotten more about dagny’s backstory, but all we know is that she’s going through a divorce. which, that sucks, but it’s also VERY COMMON. if she would’ve un-iced herself a little more before the game’s end, i would’ve definitely liked her a lot more.

#asks #anonymous #I KNOW SOME OF THESE ARE POLARIZING BUT MY HEART IS SET

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gold-from-straw · 6 years

Text

The Golden Prince - Ch2

This chapter contains quite graphic violence, so I’ve used a cut! If you want to read from the beginning, here it is on AO3!

Percy followed his prince up the last wide streets to the palace, never allowing his focus to lapse. Prince Credence glided through the vaulted corridors, his back straight, his poise perfect as always. Percy was close enough that he alone could see the sweat dampening the black curls against the graceful curve of his neck, and he had to force his gaze away.

True to his word, he walked straight to the council chambers, where his mother the Queen would be holding court. Percy noticed no flinch in his demeanour, no flicker of fear, save for the clenching of his fists, skin stretching white over his knuckles. Percy’s heart ached. He wished, not for the first time, that the young man he adored was not so kind, would think more of himself than his people. If it were so, Percy could have some chance of one day convincing him to run from this repressive land in the dead of night, flee the violence and control and travel together, under Percy’s protection. Many a night had he spent in dreams of simply wandering, like he had done in his youth, before he arrived in Salem. Those days had been carefree, but lonely, and imagining the perfection of Prince Credence by his side, bestowing those precious small smiles on him, was an indulgence to be treasured in absolute secrecy.

Credence stopped the requisite seven paces from the throne and dipped his head in a bow. Percy dropped to his knee.

“Prince Credence.” Queen Mary’s voice was ice to Percy’s spine. “For what reason do you interrupt the council in session?”

Percy’s immediate instinct was to bristle on his prince’s behalf. Credence was of age, surely it was not only his right to take part in council meetings, but his obligation. As heir it was vital that he learn statecraft. But Credence’s voice betrayed no impatience or irritation. “My queen,” he said, his voice soft and carrying to every corner of the great chamber. “Forgive my intrusion. It has come to my attention that there has been an arrest made in error, an accusation of witchcraft mistakenly made.”

There was silence. The hairs at the nape of Percy’s neck raised in warning.

“Are you questioning the wisdom of our most vital law, Prince Credence?”

Credence’s head snapped up, his first show of fear. “Not at all, your Majesty! I would never consider it.”

“And yet you speak on behalf of a witch, whose own neighbour has denounced her for unspeakable acts? Tell me, my child, do you know this woman better than those who are forced to live near her?”

He bowed his head again in supplication. “Her husband—“

She scoffed, and Percy felt the eyes of the council fall derisively on Credence’s bent neck. “Her husband. A man in the thrall of a witch? You believe his word over that of a God-fearing neighbour, a man well respected and active in the church.” She turned to one of her councillors. “Remind me, Lord Griggs, of the evidence against Temperance Bradbury.”

A thin, white haired man stood and coughed importantly. “The case against Mrs Bradbury was brought by a Mr Timothy Swann, who claimed that Mrs Bradbury had cast upon him the evil eye, and caused him to become unnaturally enamoured of her. Indeed, upon investigation, many items of a concerning nature were found in her possession, including an amulet for worshiping the moon goddess, and a poppet believed to be used in the cursing of good Christians.” He looked up and sniffed. “We are even now collecting further evidence against her from other neighbours.”

“And what about evidence on her behalf?” asked Credence, standing straight once more, his voice limned in steel. Percy felt warmth flood his every cell, fear and pride for his prince saturating him.

He stood, his chin high, face determined as he gazed into his mother’s eyes. Queen Mary stared down at him, the slightest curl to her lip. “I am concerned about your priorities, Prince Credence. I believe it is time to remind you of where your loyalties lie. Time for you to prove your devotion to our Lord God and rejection of Satan and his servants, those who would practice witchcraft.” She turned to the council, her voice rising to spread, insidious, through the hall, through the unknown channels of gossip and into the city. “Let it never be said that I show favouritism. Let it be known that I shall punish my own flesh and blood in defence of the Word of God, and that our battle against the evil of witchcraft may be waged across the lines of love and family. The witch Temperance Bradbury shall be hanged at noon on the morrow.”

“No!”

Her head snapped to Credence as he cried out, and her eyes narrowed. “And my son shall take twenty lashes with the scourge, as a reminder that our Lord Jesus suffered for our sins, and we shall suffer gladly with him.”

Percy felt the blood drain from his face. He wanted nothing more than to gather the prince up and run with him, but Credence gathered his poise and straightened his back. With his spine dead straight, he walked after the Queen, a silent procession that grew as they neared the courtyard. Percy glared at every face that joined, remembering those whose eyes gleamed with schadenfreude, and those who looked after the prince in sorrow.

His very soul ached to see his beloved prince step out into the courtyard and strip his golden coat off, revealing a back littered with scars. He nodded to the executioner, Jacob, who bowed his curly head in sorrow and respect. The queen mounted the stairs to the royal box, her voice cold and clear as she announced the execution of the blacksmith’s wife, and the punishment of the prince.

The people gathered as the news spread through the city. Jacob lifted the scourge, braided leather thongs interspersed with shards of bone, vicious and unnecessary. Percy felt ill.

“Stop,” called the queen. Her voice projected clearly without her raising it. “To prove your loyalty to queen and country, I would have your most loyal knight perform the punishment.”

Percy’s heart froze in his chest. He could not - he could never bear to hurt Credence. But the prince turned, his eyes meeting Percy’s, and he nodded. There was nothing but peace and acceptance in his expression, and Percy could not bear it.

Jacob placed the handle of the whip in Percy’s hand. “Do not hold back your strength,” he said softly, sad eyes meeting Percy’s. “It will do him no good. Trust me.”

Credence turned to face the whipping post, muscle and sinew shifting under his skin as he raised his hands over his head. Percy’s feet led him forwards, each step like lead.

“Begin,” called the queen, and Percy steeled himself. He raised the scourge, hating the feel of the leather in his hand, the sound of the bone clicking, the evil woman who would have her own son whipped in front of his people by the man who would have done anything to save him from harm. He took a breath, held back his gorge, and swung his arm.

The first lash fell across his shoulder blades, and Credence twitched, but made no sound. Percy cringed, his heart shrivelling within his chest, but he lifted the whip again. As the strikes fell, the shards of bone ripping into his skin, leaving red lines of inflammation and torn flesh, Percy gulped back his grief and rage.

By the fifth strike, the blood was flowing. By the seventh, Credence was grunting in pain. When he cried out loud on the eleventh, the bone slicing into the skin on his ribs, Percy could hold back his own sobs no longer. He whipped the leather into his beloved prince’s body, his eyes blurred with tears.

He was breathing hard, almost sobbing, by the twentieth. Credence’s knees had given out beneath him and he sagged, his head hanging low between his shoulders. Percy returned the hated scourge to Jacob, wiping his tears away discretely before turning to the prince.

Credence had gathered his strength, his legs holding him, though they trembled visibly. He gathered his silk shirt and coat, buttoning them up though the blood soaked through the fine material immediately, and turned, his poise perfect as he bowed to his mother. Thanked her for her protection of his immortal soul. Percy kept his mouth shut lest he lose the contents of his stomach.

He remained standing in the courtyard as the queen left, as the council dispersed. As the people returned, heads bowed, to their work. He stood, eyes fixed on the precious blood that marred the dust of the courtyard.

@fckimlovingit, @vacantbloodbones, @theaterclassmademegay, @soz I hope you guys don’t mind me tagging you every chapter! If you do please tell me and I’ll stop!

#my writing #fantastic beasts and where to find them #The Golden Prince #Gradence #credence barebone #percival graves #tw: blood #tw: abuse #tw: violence #tw: whipping #tw: scars

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activatingaggro · 7 years

Note

SINCE YOU HAVE GIVEN YOUR BLESSING FOR THE AWFULNESS: "Can I?" for ID and Laledy!

CW: Age gap, ID being oblivious and then terrible.

You never thought much about it, but Laledy’s about Bonnie’s age, isn’t he?

It’s not like he’s got the sort of face that invites that sort of comparision! Bonnie’s all bone and sinew, sure, just like him, but every ounce of her is pure muscle. You’ve seen the sort of damage she can do! She might not be through her adult molt yet. She’s still all adolescent gangle, with the sort of lankiness you can’t figure if it’s youth or real. But no one’s ever going to try to sell her school-feeds.

On the other hand, Laledy’s got the sort of face that makes him look like he still belongs in the caverns.

But that doesn’t mean much! Raphae was still sporting gray eyes until barely a sweep ago, and the last time you saw a picture of him, he’s only just outgrowing them. Highbloods age strange, that’s the problem with them. You’ll be dead before Bonnie starts going gray. Chances are, you’ll be long dead before this sprout stops looking like a pupa.

He isn’t quite her age. But he’s close enough! And Empress only knows she needs more friends.

“Grubadee, have I ever told you about my moirail?” you ask him, and at the other end of the table, he starts like you just hit him.

“Moirail? Wait, uh – you have quadrants?”

Well! That’s not the response you were expecting.

Instead of responding, you take a long sip of your tea. Taking Laledy out for lunch had been a lark. Why not drag the little cullbait out on a proper outing at night, for once, and do your good deed for the sweep? Let him get some proper moonlight on his skin before he burns it all off! He’d been excited when you first mentioned it. Downright pleased, really, and he’d only made two jokes about buying his favour.

(Still two too many! Slap some paint on this boy and you’d think he was a

clown, sometimes, his sense of humor is so awful.)

But he’s been acting strange about it the entire morning twilight, dragging his feet and bouncing in turn. You’d figured it was nerves! Sipara never liked buggies, the first few times she drove in one. But you’ve been at the cafe for nearly two hours now, it’s nearly dawn, and his mood still hasn’t settled any.

Of all the ways it might swing, though, you didn’t figur ehe was going to go off and get all rude on you. But you don’t even have time to tell him he gets to rephrase that before he’s already scrambling. “For reals, tho! Like, not even gonna lie, I totes thought you were, like, doin’ the lone ranger shizz, between like - the whole pancrackin’, and the code-monkeying.”

“It’s, like, thematic,” he hazards, chewing on his lip.

“Calm your spheres, sugargrub. I’m not offended,” you lie, setting down your cup. He visibly relaxes back into his chair. There’s just something so fucking sad about the relief in his grin: he’s Bonnie’s age, sure, but you’re pretty darn certain she’d never scrape for your approval like this.

“So. Uh. You have quadrants.” He says it like it’s some big surprise.

“Did I say quadrants? Shame on you, sprout, don’t put words in my mouth!” You click your tongue at him. “I have a moirail, sugarplum. Don’tcha know, our fine lady Q doesn’t require the rest of ‘em?”

The cafe’s owned by some girl like Taylor, a blueblood with her nose all the way up in places it shouldn’t be. No one even bats an ear the letter, or mention of ladies: half of the folks here look well past Conscription, and you know all of them can’t be imperials. It’s one of the only places you can mention the Queenpin without risking your neck!

Not that it stops Laledy from looking side to side, like drones are about to pop out from under the tableclothes. “LIke, what, no pitch-mate?” he asks, curious, and there’s something strange in his voice. Amusement? If he starts laughing, you might very well just leave him here. You don’t understand pupas. “For

reals? And no flush? Not even ash?”

You blink at him.

“.. no~oo. ‘fraid not!” You slide your empty glass forward, and then wave for a waiter. This is the sort of place that Raphae used to take you to after shows, and the sort of place you’ve missed, since coming back to Alternia. You don’t get to drag Bonnie out here often: she gets a little too restless to sit still this long, for all that it’s nicer than her flavor of ice-cream parlors.

Different tastes, you suppose. No one’s getting shot here, sure, but they took your chip at the door, so all you have to do is leave.

A little less excitement’s worth that sort of luxury!

“Is it that shocking?” You snort. “I’m flattered,” you add, amused, “that you think I’m just such an amazing commodity that my squares are just flying off the shelves, sweetheart. So flattered. Downright touched.”

He doesn’t laugh. But he does smile, a little weakly. “Dunno about flying off,” he snarks. “I mean, shizz, pal, you ain’t even got a sweater on. Thought knitwear was, like, your thing?”

“It is, it is.” The smile, the gab: he’s back into an upswing, thank the Empress. You’ll dump him at Taylor’s before he can drop back down. He’s just not very entertaining like this, when he’s acting like he’s being cowed at every corner. “But alas, my finest cardigans are all with my dear bluebonnet right now. Which ist o say, my dearest, most beloved and bedraggled of moirails. She’s probably ripping holes into them right now,” you say, mournful as you stand up. “Bless her heart. She likes adventure. And she’s your age - have I mentioned that?”

“I was thinking, sweetheart, the two of you ought to meet! You’ve both got such unique senses of humor, bless your little biscuits. Why, you’d get along like a house on fire.”

“.. um. You want me to meet your moirail? Like, won’t that be, hella awks?” A beat. “Or does she, like, not mind -” He’s standing up, but now he pauses. For a second, you think he’s going to gesture at his eyes. “- she work for mizz QP, too?” is what he settles on instead. He’s following your lead, stepping neatly around the table as you slip back on your jacket. The slide of his cane on the carpet is very nearly inaudible. “Or is she, like, the local, law-respectin’ sort?”

“Oh, absolutely,” you drawl, heading towards the door. “Don’t you know, my little sprout, that’s just my type? Law-abiding, proper imperial citizens only! No criminals, no cull-bait, certainly no girls with perfectly illegal transportation —”

Laledy’s been on your heels the entire way out of the cafe, the solid clack of his cane on the concrete behind you a ready reminder to keep your pace slow. But you’re still several steps from your buggy when you realise the sound has disappeared, and he isn’t actually following. You exhale, rolling your eyes up, and then spin to face him. “Laledy!” you say, sharp. “Sugargrub! What in the world is your -”

“So, um, is this, like, a date?” Laledy blurts out.

Well.

“Oh, shit. Uh, not that it’s gotta be - I mean, ‘course it ain’t, what’m I thinking, fancy food ‘n all is just, like - I was just -”

He doesn’t pause when you hold up a hand. He doesn’t stop when you clear your throat. But when you snap: “Laledy!” with just a touch of fang to it, he stops so quickly he nearly bites his tongue.

”Clearly,” you say, once he’s quieted down, “you want it to be! And who am I to crush your dreams?” Something about this seems a bit strange. But he’s very nearly Bonnie’s age, for all that he’s pupa-faced, and his eyes, if they weren’t blind, would be green. So it’s only a little outrageous, you suppose. “So, to answer your little question - before you went entirely off the rails - why not? You can get in the car, by the way!”

”Unless you’re planning on making this lot your new home. I mean, I guess it is nice, but just between the two of us, miss Queene’s couch is just a wee bit nicer.”

You linger by the car door as he clicks his way over, then you pull it open for him, holding out a hand to take his cane. “Here,” you say, and the look he gives you - wide-eyed, alarmed - earns him a laugh. “I’m helping, sugarhorns! Tell you what, I’ll even give it back when you get hive, how’s that?”

This is nicer than you would be in any other circumstances! But if you’re evidently just making his night, then there’s no point in doing it halfway. And the startled doe look is worth it.

”Hey! Uh, ID. Wait.” You’re sliding the cane into the seat behind him, but now you pause. Laledy’s worrying his lip, scratching at the side of his neck like he’s about to say something interesting. Tonight’s been full of surprises: you can’t even imagine what’s going through his pan, and you’re too amused to even want to guess.

.. not that you can help it. Maybe he’s figuring out a way to let you down gently! Break your poor pumpbiscuit over his accusations of a date, let you know he just doesn’t feel that way, bless your heart. The thought’s endearing. And he certainly looks anxious enough for it.

You’re already thinking of a witty rejoinder when he blurts out: “– can I kiss you?”

Well. Isn’t that just precious?

”No,” you tell him, amused.

You don’t even finish the word before he’s deflating. His cheeks flood green, then his face. His ears pull back and down. “I’m sorry,” is the first thing he says, but not the last: the rest of his words are practically a slurry, they’re so mixed up, falling on top of each other like he can’t even be bothered to keep them straight. “I’m a dumbass! Soz, soz, sorry -”“- you didn’t let me finish, you little cactus.” The first laugh had him quieting. The second one got you a frown, and now he’s looking – confused, still, but belligerent! Serves him right. Laledy’s mystifying, but he’s amusing, too, even when his mood keeps spinning every time you blink. “Stop writhing,” you order. “You can’t kiss me, but I’ll tell you what, dearheart -”

When you grab his chin, it fits neatly between your thumb and your forefinger. And when you lift his face up, he doesn’t object, just makes some queer sound at the back of his throat. “- I will kiss you. How’s that?”

”Yeah,” he breathes, shaky. “Okay.”

#[drabbles]#cw: age gap #laledy is NOT actually bonnie's age #ID just doesn't give enough of a damn to have registered his age beyond 'younger than me'#because: awful. AWFUL.#anonymonster

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titoslondon-blog · 7 years

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New Post has been published on Titos London

#Blog New Post has been published on http://www.titoslondon.com/askhermore-to-zac-posen-gowns-galore-instyles-a-z-of-awards-season/

#AskHerMore, To Zac Posen Gowns Galore - InStyle’s A-Z Of Awards Season

A is for…#AskHerMore

A is all about the feminist #AskHerMore red carpet movement. Pioneered by Reese Witherspoon and Amy Poehler in 2015, it’s all about changing the way media (that's us too) talks to women and encouraging them to ask better questions than just ‘'Who are you wearing?'. Because quelle surprise women have views on politics and current events as well. B is for…Bliiiiiing

And a whole lot of it. From the now infamous $2.5 million 115-carat Lorraine Schwartz emerald drop earrings that Angelina sashayed down the Oscars 2009 red carpet wearing, to Cate Blanchett’s Chopard earrings, bracelet and ring combo that cost a whopping $18 million, when it comes to standing out at an awards ceremony, it’s all about the bling. The winner of our Ultimate Bling Award? Elizabeth Taylor, obvs. The queen of more is more, Taylor’s then husband Richard Burton bought her a 69.42 carat diamond ring for $1 million but, as Elizabeth puts it, ‘Even for me it was too big. So we had Cartier design a necklace.’ Well, as we always say, when your diamond’s too big to wear as a ring, whack it on a pendant and wear it to the 1970 Academy Awards around your neck instead. Understated, who?

C is for…Charlize Theron

Who knew that Charlize Theron was such a babe? Well, we did. An epic actress (she won an Oscar for her terrifying role in Monster), a style chameleon and repping on the red carpet for taller ladies everywhere, Charlize is the ultimate awards badass and we’re obsessed.

D is for…Diversity

With Meryl Streep’s Golden Globes speech addressing immigration straight on, and the 2017 Oscar nominations finally making progress against #oscarssowhite with a black actor being nominated in all four acting categories for the first time EVER, the awards diversity drought is officially over. Hooray!

E is for…EE Rising Star Award

Arguably the most exciting award of the year (because it involves majorly hyped new talent like Ruth Negga and Tom Holland aka Spiderman) the BAFTA EE Rising Star Award is so snazzy we throw a party for it every year. Check the deets HERE.

F is for…Fancy Dress

Bjork’s swan moment, Cher’s 1986 ‘Mohawk year’ and Rihanna’s Britney-meets-Egyptian bejewelled bodystocking – yup, when it comes to red carpet dressing there’s always one that takes it to that bit too far to the realms of fancy dress. And we look forward to that one every year, natch.

G is for…Gaga

When she’s not being carried along the red carpet in an egg, wearing yesterday’s beef tartare as a dress or performing an epic ode to David Bowie with glam rock costume changes to match, Lady Gaga’s generally stealing the limelight at any and every awards show. Case in point: accepting her 2011 MTV awards in character as her male alter ego Jo Calderone. Lady Gaga going method? Groundbreaking.

H is for…Hosts (The Weird, The Wonderful And The Awkward)

The fun part about awards shows? They inevitably have to be hosted by two celebrities that would never normally talk to each other but now have to share a stage and present funny quips and bits for hours on end. A recipe for success, non? Well, if you’re hilarious comedians and besties Amy Poehler and Tina Fey presenting the 2015 Golden Globes, then yes. But if you’re Anne Hathaway attempting to present the 2011 Oscars with a possibly stoned but either way totally out of it James Franco, then alas, no.

I is for…Insta Madness

If only Bradley's arm was longer. Best photo ever. #oscars pic.twitter.com/C9U5NOtGap

— Ellen DeGeneres (@TheEllenShow) 3 March 2014

If you didn’t see THAT group selfie at the 2014 Oscars, then what hole were you living in? Ellen’s celebrity studded Hollywood selfie broke the internet and started a new A-list obsession with Instagram. Just try and get through awards season without liking Chrissy Teigen’s adorable backstage pics with John Legend or Lily Collins asking your opinion on what Zuhair Murad gown she should choose. It’s all about the BTS (that’s behind-the-scenes) pics babe.

via GIPHY

J is for…Jennifer Lawrence Falling Over

via GIPHY

Doing a damn good impression of a weeble, Jennifer Lawrence can’t help falling head over heels for awards shows, literally. Tripping over her massive Dior gown on the way to receive her Best Actress Oscar back in 2013, J-Law’s tumble was surely the most Tweeted about awards moment that year. That, and her tripping over a cone. And every other time she’s totally stacked it. Jennifer, we salute your ability to power through embarrassment.

K is for…Kisses

Remember that time Angelina Jolie said she was ’so in love’ with her brother before kissing him smack on the lips at the 2000 Oscars? Well, we do. And tbh, it’s still weird. Between that and John Travolta’s surprise attack on Scarlett Johansson, awards season always seems to bring out the awkward affectionate sides of celebs (and their siblings).

L is for…Loser Face

via GIPHY

Some people can nail the perfect Joey from Friends gracious loser face, and others…well they don’t keep it together so well. Take Samuel L Jackson who, when losing the 1995 Best Supporting Actor Oscar to Martin Landau, could be see mouthing ‘Oh shit’ on screen. Or when Kanye, in true Kanye fashion, took things one step further by crashing Taylor Swfit’s VMA award win to defend losing nominee Beyonce’s honour thus beginning an A-list feud of epic proportions. A polite clap would have been fine.

M is for…Meryl Streep

via GIPHY

Officially the most nominated person EVER. That is all.

N is for…Novel Adaptations We’ve Never Read

Let’s face it, every year there’s a bazillion films nominated that are actually super intellectual novel adaptations that we’ll pretend to our ridiculously informed and cultural friends we’ve totally read but in reality we’ve just watched the movie and googled some original quotes. Soz, not soz.

O is for…Opening Numbers

Hugh Jackman’s adorable, if slightly awkward, dance number with Anne Hathaway at the 2009 Oscars, Andrew Rannell’s all singing, all dancing rendition of ‘I Believe’ from The Book Of Mormon at the 2011 Tony Awards and Neil Patrick Harris’ arguably best ever Tony Awards performance in 2013 are just a few of the awards show opening numbers to go down in history for the right reasons. We won’t mention the wrong ones.

P is for…Poor Leo

2017 aka the year Leonardo Di Caprio finally won an oscar. It’s fair to say a few people may have given up on it ever happening, including Leo himself. #poorleo.

A photo posted by Angel (@bri6427) on

Jun 30, 2016 at 8:40pm PDT

Q is for…Queen Bey

via GIPHY

If anyone else can announce their pregnancy on stage at the Grammys and bring a tear to our eye quite like Queen Bey we’ll eat our jauntily tipped purple fedora Destiny’s Child style. Lest we forget THAT game-changing Country Music Awards performance of Daddy Lessons with Dixie Chicks that we’ve listened to like 300 times. Ok fine, 500.

R is for…Red Carpet Hype

Fact – you can’t have an awards show without a red carpet, but where did it even come from? Why not a blue carpet? First thunk up by LA showman Sid Graumman in 1922, the red carpet made its debut at the first ever Hollywood premiere, Robin Hood, but didn’t make an appearance at the Oscars until 1961 when film enthusiasts watching on tv couldn’t even tell it was red because of the black and white picture. The epitome of you had to be there.

Fun fact – the carpet outside the Dolby Theatre where the Oscars are held is 500 ft long. Incidentally, just enough room for Jennifer Lawrence to fall over in.

S is for…Speech Cock Ups And General Weirdness

youtube

Part two of the awkward hosting section of our A-Z, it’s not an awards season if someone doesn’t mess up an acceptance speech, mispronounce a celeb’s name or send a worthy cause to accept the award on their behalf. Check out Miley Cyrus sending a young homeless dude called Jesse Helt to pick up her 2014 MTV Award (which he’s appaz now auctioning off, that’s gratitude for you), John Travolta classically messing up Idina Menzel’s name and Tom Hiddleston, god bless him, attempting to tell an inspirational anecdote and totally missing the mark. Oscar fails are our fave.

T is for…The Leg

Need we say more? Winning our award for best dressed at the 2012 Oscars, Angelina Jolie’s right leg made such a statement it even had its own Twitter account.

U is for…Ugly Crying

via GIPHY

Yes, it’s an emotional time for everyone, but there’s some that handle the sitch better than others. Gwyneth Paltrow was not one of them. We won’t even mention Halle Berry. Let’s just say we’d give them the Oscar for ugly crying.

V is for…Valentino

That iconic black and white dress Julia Roberts wore to win her Oscar back in 2001 that you always remember every time the Oscars rolls round again? It was Valentino. Cate Blanchett’s timeless one-shouldered yellow dress she wore for her 2005 Best Supporting Actress Oscar win? Yup, Valentino.Scarlett Johansson’s seriously major red dress that put her on the map? You guessed it, Valentino. When it comes to dressing like a winner (or dressing a winner, should we say), Valentino have got it down.

W is for…Wardrobe Malfunctions

via GIPHY

From Chrissy Teigen’s NSFW leg split to Geri Halliwell’s 1997 Brit Awards boob slip, a well-placed (pardon the pun) wardrobe malfunction gets you more column inches than actually winning an award. Our fave? J-Law’s gravity-defying dress tear that magically reattaches itself almost instantly. We geuinely don't know what happened there.

X is for…Exes

There’s nothing better than proving how totally fine you are about an overly publicised breakup by revenge winning an award literally in front of your ex. On the other hand, bumping into an ex on the red carpet isn’t exactly ideal. Oh Hollywood, you’re so small and incestuous and adorable. Brad and Angelina, we wish you good luck.

Y is for…Yellow

Black is so blah. If you want to make a statement on the red carpet it’s all about wearing yellow. Take notes from Reese Witherspoon’s post-Ryan Philippe break up LYD (little yellow dress) and Rachel from Friends fringe that was TOO good or Michelle Williams winning at life in a yellow custom Vera Wang dress that we’ve basically never got over. Nabbing the canary yellow torch and carrying it into 2017, Emma Stone’s red hair, pink lips, yellow dress combo is so chic it’s insane.

Z is for…Zac Posen

Bringing an air of mid-century couture to the often pedestrian fashion proceedings, you can bet your money on Zac Posen dressing the most dramatic, and high fashion celebrity on the red carpet. Noteworthy moment – Christina Hendricks wearing the widest emerald green skirt you ever did see before whipping it off to reveal a fitted mermaid tail gown underneath. And our girl crush hit new heights.

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punkscowardschampions · 4 years

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Janis & Jimmy

Janis: I know we said no more plans Janis: but hear me out Jimmy: Go on Janis: I'm sick of my fam being on my back Janis: and they've only ramped it up since the whole joyride, which didn't even happen so Janis: 💡 Jimmy: What? Janis: It's a bit weird but reckon you can handle it, it won't take much Janis: 'cos obvs they think you're so 😎 you've just gotta come and be 😇 at 'em for a sec so they calm down Janis: like I said, their concern does not ever last long but I can't hack this bullshit, my sister's at it now as well Jimmy: I ain't going to church but if it ain't that Janis: Church nan ain't white nan, you're fine Janis: unless you hit her up too Jimmy: Is she as fit as your white nan 'cause then I might do Janis: questions like this are why you're in the bad books Jimmy: I weren't planning to bend her over a pew, you're alright Jimmy: I can fake 😇 Janis: Can you not be so disgusting please Janis: heavy dose of the good 📔 asap Jimmy: You gonna give me a smack with it? Janis: You'd obvs like it so no Janis: focus, boy Jimmy: 💔 Jimmy: So business like today, you Jimmy: there an actual plan then or what? Janis: Um yes Janis: got your listening 👂s on now? Jimmy: crack on and we'll see Janis: not rocket science, like Janis: just got to come over and not sneak in, actually acknowledge my parents exist for once Janis: no fucker else is here, even Gracie is gone so I'll want to die slightly less Jimmy: I'll bring my homework, ain't started owt yet & there's a art project that you're the perfect muse for Janis: Good thinking Janis: you know, be yourself, they ain't thick but show them that there's definitely no 💀pact going on here Janis: just 🤓💕 Jimmy: I get it, no using our blood as paint Jimmy: 👍 Janis: 💔 Janis: no one more than me, trust Jimmy: I'll 💀💀💀 you first chance I get baby Janis: 🤤🤤🤤 Janis: just get through dinner Janis: what do you like, anyway Jimmy: When? Janis: oh, tonight Janis: if you can? Jimmy: I don't have any white robes, like Jimmy: What else do 😇 wear? Janis: as discussed, burning cross is fine Janis: not to wear just to show your true colours, whitey Janis: 🤔 idk Jimmy: You have to kill me yourself, Jules, the death pact ain't between me, your dad and his shotgun Janis: Not likely Janis: total hippie pacifist loser Janis: gives you an idea of the dresscode but I won't be able to pretend I'm 😍 Janis: can only act so much Jimmy: So 😎 but in yellow or some shit? Jimmy: 👌 Janis: maybe you should ask Mia Janis: queen of fashion Jimmy: Hang on then Janis: 😏 Jimmy: She's typing Janis: edge of my seat Janis: she's so witty Jimmy: #same Jimmy: 👀🍿 Janis: 😂 Janis: must be buzzing Janis: not getting any #content from gracie rn Jimmy: I'm gonna need you to skim read this back to me, I don't do essays in the hols Janis: so chatty, her Janis: RBF would never give it away Jimmy: [sends whatever the hell Mia has] Jimmy: what colour is the new black? Janis: awh, she misses us too Janis: very helpful, basically, ditch the 😎 and your usual is fine Jimmy: 👍 Janis: you actually alright with this, yeah Jimmy: Do you want me to kick off to prove I'm obvs still 😎 and you're alright to still fancy me? Janis: shut up Janis: it's just idk Janis: bit serious Janis: but they will not leave me alone it's ridiculous Jimmy: Don't ask them if I can 💍 you ✔ Jimmy: or 💀💀💀 you ✔✔ Janis: about the gist Janis: dickhead Janis: don't need to like you that much Janis: then you'll never escape 'em either Jimmy: It's nowt I can't handle Jimmy: have had a girlfriend before, like Jimmy: she had parents an' all, even with the northern life expectancy at about 51 Janis: I'm sure they were normal people though Janis: #normalfornorthern Jimmy: 😂 Jimmy: Yeah I were just begging them to take me in Jimmy: thing were she was begging her dad's best mate to take her out Janis: 😬 Janis: would've made mealtimes a bit awks Jimmy: It did do when they were playing footsie under the table Jimmy: but he's got them well and truly under now so it all came right in the end Janis: Gross Janis: we've got a similar story but defs one to avoid Janis: touchy subject, literally Jimmy: 🤐 about that on the night, gotcha girl Janis: 👍 Janis: weren't me though, 'fore you ask Jimmy: weren't about to Jimmy: there's some shit I'm better off not knowing, I reckon Janis: not very #goals Janis: meant to be dying to know everything about me Jimmy: then I'd have to return the favour Jimmy: you're alright Janis: my thoughts exactly Jimmy: 💕 Janis: can get back to whatever shit you were up to then Jimmy: ☕🎨 Janis: wouldn't have been impressive if I'd guessed then Janis: good to know Jimmy: least you've got a clue Jimmy: they've got me teaching the new lass Jimmy: 🙄 Janis: trusts you again, at least Janis: gutted though Jimmy: no other dickhead'll do it Jimmy: she nearly melted Pete's beautiful face off Janis: 😱 Janis: why weren't she sacked on the spot Janis: can't be risking their best asset like that Jimmy: She's the manager's goddaughter or some bollocks Janis: shameless nepotism and all Janis: scandal Jimmy: You were right though, no doubt he's my #ultimatewingman Jimmy: me and her, all this steam Janis: nothing as romantic as minor scalds Janis: 🙄 Jimmy: when you've seen a lass' milk frothing technique Janis: mhmm Janis: when that technique leaves half the staff needed to raid the first aid box Jimmy: #livingdangerously Jimmy: 😎🚬 Janis: you're so dumb Jimmy: 💔 ow Jimmy: worst burn of all that were Janis: Not my finest I'm aware but not on the clock Jimmy: what are you doing then, rich girl? Jimmy: if it ain't making fancy food for tonight, I'll be well offended Janis: and take away the only use my father has? Janis: I would never Janis: doing fuck all, if it suits your #poorlittlerichgirl narrative Jimmy: So come here Jimmy: Don't have to be 😇 at the CG Janis: you're busy Jimmy: I'm 💀💀💀 Janis: you're 🎓 Jimmy: Do you want me to survive til tonight or not? Janis: I mean if you died in a tragic steam related accident, they'll just be trying to comfort me so yeah Janis: probs Jimmy: Alright, dickhead Jimmy: I'll let her ⚰👻 me Jimmy: You only had the one job for fuck's sake Jimmy: 👋😘 Janis: Don't be a twat Janis: let her do it and you'll end up a 🥕 Jimmy: What? can't 👂 you being a twat over the sound of my 😱😱😱 Jimmy: it ain't quite death throes but she's getting somewhere Janis: go die quietly Janis: we ain't friends no more and I won't miss you Jimmy: with all them 🎻🎻 playing, how can I? Janis: seriously Jimmy: It's their livelihood this orchestra, the lads take it well seriously Janis: such a windup Jimmy: you Janis: how am I Janis: 🃏 Jimmy: soz, can't come to the phone 'cause I'm 💀💀💀 Jimmy: I'll miss you even though you don't me Janis: stop being so basic and I might Jimmy: bit rude Jimmy: I'm in work and that's my job description near enough in full Janis: and they all 💕 it Jimmy: You jealous? Janis: why would I be Jimmy: that ain't an answer Janis: you're one to talk, boy Jimmy: Why am I? Janis: 'cos you always do that Jimmy: what are you on about, Jennifer? Janis: 🙄 Janis: you, div Janis: always answer questions with a question Jimmy: Bollocks Janis: Er yeah you do Janis: not gonna make it up Jimmy: I answer loads of questions Janis: yeah Janis: sure, I don't ask you loads so Jimmy: 🙄 Janis: ugh Janis: be nice Jimmy: you Janis: I am Janis: you're trying to make me jealous for some reason Jimmy: Why would I do that? Janis: You tell me Jimmy: you tell me, you're the one who reckons I'm doing it Janis: you're the one that keeps chatting about the new girl Jimmy: I ain't said nowt about her Janis: if you hadn't, I wouldn't know she existed Jimmy: if you don't wanna know what I'm up to, say that Janis: you can tell me without taking the piss Jimmy: No I can't, she's that shit Janis: Bummer Jimmy: Are you gonna stop being a dickhead now or what? Janis: Probably not Janis: genetic Janis: and I've got a lifelong streak going so Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: in a bit then Janis: that's rude Janis: don't act like you didn't know Jimmy: had my 🤞 you were faking it, like Jimmy: 💔 Janis: too bad Jimmy: 🎻🎻 Janis: bye Janis: arsehole Jimmy: now that's rude Janis: I got the hint Janis: no need for pleasantries Jimmy: 🥇🧠 you Jimmy: grabbing hints I ain't even putting about Jimmy: no need for you to be in a right mard more like Janis: you've been pretty clear Janis: even without answering questions Janis: forget it, like Jimmy: clear about what? that I wanna see you, yeah Jimmy: I get that your parents are on your case but I ain't done nowt but said I'll help Janis: no Janis: never mind Janis: I need to get out of this house Jimmy: So come here Jimmy: like I said Janis: I'm clearly in a bad mood, like you said Jimmy: and what? Janis: you don't need that Jimmy: Bollocks Jimmy: I always need you Janis: say it again Jimmy: I need you all the fucking time, alright? Janis: yeah Janis: definitely alright Janis: more than Jimmy: then just Janis: I am Jimmy: Are you? Jimmy: 'cause I Janis: the bus ain't here but yeah Janis: I really wanna see you Janis: know it ain't been any time really but Jimmy: You need to move in with your fit nan, girl Jimmy: living in the middle of nowt ain't working Jimmy: I'll go have a word Janis: you did not hit it off as well as you're reckoning, babe Janis: soz Jimmy: actually 💔 Jimmy: no salt needed for this caramel with all them 😭 of mine Janis: 😏 Janis: know how you feel Janis: being the favourite had its perks, namely that spare room Janis: no more Jimmy: I don't how that feels but being no fuckers fave has its perks an' all Jimmy: namely I don't give a damn if Ian don't want you in my room Janis: come on, you're definitely the boy's fave Janis: not like its Ian Jimmy: It's Grace Jimmy: he's too young to know better obvs Janis: how she likes 'em Janis: where she is atm, so my other sister can swan about being the ultimate rich girl Jimmy: You're gonna have to stay, if only to win our kid round Jimmy: I just ain't having it Janis: tryna pit me against her ain't the best idea to get me to do anything, FYI Janis: but luckily I wanna anyway Jimmy: I ain't saying that, I'm saying do it for me Jimmy: and I'll do owt for you Janis: a lot to promise Jimmy: only if you're asking for a lot off me Janis: d'ya trust me then Jimmy: Should I? Janis: I don't know Janis: probably not, track record would say Jimmy: There a but coming? Janis: I want you to Jimmy: There you are then Janis: I will try Janis: no promises though Jimmy: no need for any Jimmy: got my own track record, going round in my head, talking shit Janis: yeah Janis: s'alright Janis: just promise to 💔 in an interesting, inventive way at least Janis: and I won't cheat on you Jimmy: you'll be a 🥇 muse til the end Jimmy: make it easy that Janis: you're welcome Jimmy: 💕 Janis: won't let on I ain't got a 🖤 to break Jimmy: you mean you can't 'cause it'd be fake Janis: you reckon Jimmy: I've 👂 it in there, babe Janis: must've been your own Janis: long since 💀👑 remember Jimmy: Yours is faster Jimmy: such an athlete you Janis: alright Janis: since you've been cute about it Jimmy: You feeling alright? Janis: ha ha Janis: I can relent, tah Jimmy: I was expecting a challenge Jimmy: ready to take my pulse an' all there I were Janis: anything but actual work with you Jimmy: 😏 Janis: didn't admit it was fast 'cos of you or anything so I still win Jimmy: you didn't deny it were Jimmy: go on Janis: not the point Janis: shh Jimmy: say it then Janis: why Jimmy: you reckon it's true, why not? Janis: because 😳 Janis: is why Jimmy: You're so Jimmy: when you 😳 Janis: are you taking the piss Janis: it's your fault so Jimmy: I'm not Janis: good Janis: don't, like Janis: 'cos I Jimmy: I'm not, like Jimmy: you're just really Jimmy: it Jimmy: 💀💀💀s me Janis: I just want you Janis: a lot Jimmy: it's alright Janis: I'm glad 😏 Jimmy: be 💔 if you weren't Janis: trying to tell you how much I am here Jimmy: go on Janis: I'm no poet Janis: or 🔥 sext writer Janis: but I think about you too much Janis: and I'd rather be with you than doing fuck all else Jimmy: What do you think? Janis: about you? Jimmy: Yeah Janis: Just like Janis: everything Janis: the way you look and sound Janis: when I touch you Janis: how you feel Janis: how it feels when you touch me Jimmy: It feels different with you too Jimmy: than I thought it would Jimmy: and it's been before Jimmy: I get it Janis: yeah Janis: a bit Jimmy: 🤏 Janis: it's different Jimmy: I don't wanna call you a ❄ right now Jimmy: but you are different Jimmy: you make me feel Janis: I ain't ever before Janis: felt, like Jimmy: no 🖤 you, I heard Janis: No I mean Janis: idk Jimmy: go on, I'll still get my head through the door when you get here Jimmy: promise Janis: I ain't had a boyfriend 'cos it was just Janis: nothing Janis: guess they were all just shit, yeah Jimmy: Getting with people you ain't seeing again is a bit Jimmy: the chemistry's there or it ain't Jimmy: you don't really have chance to say owt unless you're the dickhead giving out ratings after Janis: doubt it would've phased him Janis: head bigger than yours Jimmy: that's your type then Janis: shut up Janis: I ain't got a type Jimmy: You just gave yourself away there, girl Janis: I reckon it's a series of unfortunate events Janis: actually Jimmy: 💔🎻💔 Janis: ugh Jimmy: that were for me not you Jimmy: 🥇 boyfriend and still 😭😭 Jimmy: can't win with you Janis: you do Janis: that's the whole point Jimmy: beat out knobhead with a bigger head 🏆💪 Jimmy: get it engraved on the 🏆 Janis: go on then Janis: add the time you gave him mad evils Jimmy: Hang on Jimmy: I've had the pleasure an' all Janis: mhmm Janis: lucky you Jimmy: nowt's coming to mind Jimmy: his head ain't that big after all 💔 for you Janis: you were probably wasted Jimmy: Alright, pisshead, now I know you're taking the piss Janis: wanna admit you weren't Jimmy: you've seen me wasted once, there were scotch and buses involved Jimmy: only the one bellend and I'm related to him Jimmy: OMG is Ian your ex 😱😱😱 Janis: 😂 Janis: yeah Janis: you guessed it, very bitter about it Jimmy: that explains feeling nowt Jimmy: he can't get it up, why he's fuming all the time Janis: that explains that too Janis: sadly not how I remember it so Janis: insulting you'd suggest such a thing Jimmy: keep them memories to yourself, tah Janis: rude Janis: you talk about your ex Jimmy: she's a mum but she ain't yours Janis: pst Janis: it ain't actually Ian Jimmy: sounds like what you'd say if it were, that Jimmy: and no need to list every lad on the back of my 🏆 like Janis: fuck off Jimmy: bit rude Janis: rude you're calling me a slag Jimmy: never said that Jimmy: you said they were all shit Jimmy: that's more than the one you reckon I've met Janis: only the one in brazil Janis: very unlikely you've bumped into him Jimmy: #plottwist Janis: 😱 Jimmy: I'm just trying to say Jimmy: whatever you did before I got here or before we were a real #goals couple Jimmy: you don't need to tell me Jimmy: I'm not gonna make it weird Janis: just say you don't want to Janis: it's fine Jimmy: that's not Janis: Whatever Jimmy: Shut up, no Jimmy: I haven't done owt Janis: then drop it Jimmy: stop fighting with me Jimmy: I like you so much Jimmy: that's all I were trying to get at Janis: well I was just trying to Janis: it don't matter Janis: it's alright Jimmy: I'm sorry, I'll shut up Janis: you don't have to be sorry Jimmy: 🤐 me Janis: but I wanna talk to you Janis: know I'm shit at it Jimmy: I'm the one who keeps putting my foot in it today Janis: nah Janis: you're good Janis: at all of it Jimmy: Bollocks, I'm crap Janis: no you ain't Janis: I'm the one who don't get it Jimmy: what? Janis: 🖤 remember Jimmy: yeah but that was before Jimmy: mine weren't 💕 and 🌹 either Jimmy: we're in this together Janis: I Janis: I'm trying Jimmy: 🥇 you Jimmy: I mean it Janis: tah Jimmy: 💕 Jimmy: we can just Janis: yeah? Jimmy: it's alright with me Jimmy: more than Jimmy: how things are going Janis: good Janis: just tell me Janis: I feel like Janis: starting shit fake just makes it even more confusing Jimmy: Not a top 💡 Jimmy: I get it, alright Jimmy: I weren't expecting owt like this to come from it Jimmy: I weren't gonna let it Janis: yeah, obviously, like Janis: not as if I'm saying you knew from the off or anything Janis: or like if you had just sent me an unsolicited dick pic or something then this would all be so easy Jimmy: obvs that would have worked an' all Jimmy: been ages for me, chatting lasses up though Janis: I get it Janis: when you look like that you don't need to Jimmy: 1. 😳 Jimmy: 2. I didn't wanna Janis: you had other shit Janis: not the be all end all Jimmy: feeling nowt ❌ for me Jimmy: weren't gonna happen Jimmy: unless I 👻⚰ Janis: being dead makes everything easier Jimmy: that's where I fucked up most Jimmy: just makes you fitter and more mysterious Jimmy: don't need to tell you 🧛 girl Janis: you're too nice Janis: have to really commit to being a dead cunt, like Jimmy: 😂 Janis: 💀 serious Janis: even gracie can see it Jimmy: that I'm too nice or that you ain't? Janis: both but latter goes without saying Jimmy: that's what I were thinking Jimmy: but the former is only for tips Janis: alright Jimmy: at least fake believe me, Joanne Janis: not what a cunt would do Jimmy: you're not a cunt to me Jimmy: only a massive dickhead Janis: give me time Jimmy: not for that Janis: 💕 Janis: like I said, I'm trying Jimmy: if you weren't, I wouldn't be Jimmy: like I said, it's never felt like Jimmy: I've not Janis: just like the first time yeah Jimmy: no Jimmy: thank fuck Janis: was your ex your first gf Jimmy: and only Jimmy: til now Janis: really Jimmy: you're surprised? Janis: I'd have guessed at least a couple Jimmy: we were together ages Jimmy: not actually in my 40s Janis: makes sense Jimmy: did at the time, she was a mate first Jimmy: about for everything Jimmy: I didn't have to explain how much of a headcase my dad were Jimmy: or that my mum Janis: s'nice Janis: easy Janis: my idea of hell for me but there's logic to it Jimmy: It weren't though Jimmy: she might've been nice and easy but not to me Jimmy: every other lad in the north Janis: why'd you stay with her for ages then Jimmy: Does it matter? Janis: maybe Jimmy: Why? Janis: 'cos if you're just a glutton for punishment then I should probably go Jimmy: Do you wanna go? Janis: no Janis: but I should if you're just trying to get hurt Jimmy: might've been then Jimmy: that's not this Janis: okay Jimmy: we were just doing what we saw our parents do Jimmy: like maybe if we could make it work it meant they just weren't giving it a decent enough go Jimmy: then I could turn around to them and say crack on Jimmy: fuck it up differently tah Janis: you and everyone else Janis: only reason the species is still going Janis: got to be arrogant enough to reckon you can right all their wrongs Jimmy: I weren't gonna raise a kid she had with her dad's mate to prove owt though Jimmy: so that were the end of that Janis: done better than all the blokes in my fam then Jimmy: 🥇 me, my dear Janis: 🤡 them Jimmy: then my plan were to just crack on with any lasses who were up for it Jimmy: but turns out I weren't Jimmy: 🎻😭💔 Janis: you really couldn't fake it? Janis: taking your oscar back tbh Jimmy: if you don't know by now that I weren't faking nowt with you, take all your own 🏆🏆🏆🏆 back Janis: I Janis: I fucked with it all too Janis: which was annoying because you were such a dickhead Jimmy: Oi Jimmy: you're the dickhead Janis: you were though Janis: even if you've shown your true 😇 ways Jimmy: couldn't have you falling for me, Juliet Jimmy: with every other lass already 😍😍😍 Janis: oh please Janis: you were not concerned about that, mr big ego Jimmy: 😱 Janis: don't act like I gave you any indication I was that bitch Jimmy: you said you were into it, how do you reckon you weren't giving me them? Janis: into it don't = 😍 at you does it Jimmy: Alright 🤤 then Janis: 😏 Janis: didn't deny that idiot Jimmy: would if you could Janis: no I wouldn't Jimmy: just to be awkward you would Janis: 😒 Janis: you want awkward Janis: k Jimmy: I want you Jimmy: I can sort your mood out Janis: bold Jimmy: and true an' all Jimmy: Deny that Janis: just making more work for yourself rn Janis: shh Jimmy: I ain't scared of it, rich girl Jimmy: I'll show you Janis: don't be so Jimmy: what? Janis: everything Janis: distracting Jimmy: you Janis: it's all you Janis: I feel mental Jimmy: keep that between us Jimmy: challenge's been accepted, you gotta give me a chance to win your parents round Janis: all about the heroics of rescuing me Janis: I know Jimmy: Nah, fed up of lasses in distress, me Jimmy: have a go at helping me Jimmy: if and when you fancy it Janis: easy Jimmy: so 💪 you Janis: obvs Janis: and you're so damn helpable Jimmy: you're a bit nice Jimmy: I won't say owt to anyone though Janis: no one would believe you, baby Jimmy: I could prove it but I don't want you to stop Janis: you just Janis: deserve it Jimmy: that your plan now? Jimmy: 💀💀💀 without touching or looking at me Jimmy: just niceness Janis: ain't that the phrase Janis: still need to see you though don't take that from me Jimmy: I dunno can't think of owt else but you Jimmy: being here Janis: I'm not sorry Jimmy: might be when you hear how fast my 💓 is Janis: nah, saving you, remember Janis: you're safe with me, like Jimmy: yeah so shit at this you Jimmy: nowt close to the right words them Janis: I'm trying, you know that Janis: wanna have something right for once Jimmy: Baby Jimmy: you do loads right Janis: maybe Janis: plenty wrong too though Jimmy: sounds and feels fake to me, that Janis: I'm alright with you thinking it is Jimmy: get alright with how 🥇 you are Janis: be alright with how much I like you Jimmy: I am Janis: Good Janis: it'd be really hard to stop now so Jimmy: don't then Janis: tell me you don't want me to Jimmy: [voice memo cos extra and never does any work clearly] Janis: okay Janis: a bit 😍 Janis: maybe Jimmy: 🤏 Janis: that's what I'll tell this bus driver anyway Janis: 👀 to the front Jimmy: oh he wants to see something? hang on Jimmy: [😒 selfie] Jimmy: crack on, dickhead, my missus could walk here faster Janis: 😂 Janis: putting that as my phone background Jimmy: 💕 Jimmy: Give me a new one then Janis: [looking whatever kind of cute she would be tbh] Jimmy: Oi Janis: ? Janis: weren't flipping you off or anything Jimmy: where's my warning? Jimmy: I just dropped a flat white Janis: victimless crime Janis: drink it hard if you're gonna, people Janis: and if that's how you react to a 📸 better meet me outside Jimmy: it's alright, I blamed the new girl Jimmy: send me a video and we might get her the sack Janis: I'll get on it then Jimmy: 👍 Janis: hate her already Jimmy: me too Janis: nice save Jimmy: come on, babe Jimmy: don't like any dickhead but you Janis: 💕 Janis: but see how you excluded Pete and the 👴👵 by saying dickheads so Janis: 💔 Jimmy: I'm only human, soz Jimmy: reminds me though Jimmy: he's got #band drama Jimmy: if you really wanna be a hero 🎤 Janis: 😱 Janis: how's he gonna make it big at this rate Jimmy: with you as the voice and face #duh Janis: you wanna live that groupie fantasy and have the whole band or? Jimmy: 1. I'll be the 📷 Jimmy: 2. just you and him Jimmy: 3. I'll tell him you'll audition then Janis: 1. obvs Janis: 2. double obvs, can't all be the #face Janis: 3. lol no Jimmy: 4. 💔 Janis: you will be when he's 😬 at my voice Jimmy: don't call my bf stupid Jimmy: he knows 🤩🤩🤩 when he sees and hears it Janis: I would never Janis: love him too, thanks Jimmy: #loveyourself too then tah Janis: stop being a dork Jimmy: 😱 Janis: come on, I wanna talk about you, not me Jimmy: I'll 🤐 Janis: you can Janis: it's fun to make you loud Jimmy: how much longer are you gonna be stuck on the bus? Janis: too long Janis: I'm really Jimmy: tell me Janis: I'm just Janis: I need to be alone with you already Jimmy: you should've let me let the new girl melt my face off Jimmy: we could've been alone in the back of an ambulance Janis: famously not, don't let you just piss about back there Janis: and I can get us alone without involving any bimbos Janis: or ruining your beautiful face Jimmy: must give less of a shit up north 'cause I swear I have Jimmy: might've been more out of it than the memory suggests Janis: pisshead Jimmy: so sweet you Janis: soz Jimmy: I get it, it's hard for you being a lightweight Jimmy: especially when I'm so 💪🏆 Janis: far as I remember it, I've looked after you, not the other way 'round Jimmy: leave it out Janis: just saying Jimmy: that was one time Jimmy: and if you wanna get stuck into Ian's supply after a party I'll do it for you Janis: I can look after myself Janis: 💪🏆 Jimmy: me an' all Janis: 'course Jimmy: I can Janis: No, I know Janis: not taking the piss Jimmy: 👍 Janis: I didn't mean to Jimmy: forget about it Janis: but actually Jimmy: I said forget about it Janis: told you I'm shit don't let it ruin it Jimmy: It's not you, is it? Janis: what Jimmy: what that night turned into, me and him Jimmy: you weren't meant to be involved Janis: you don't have to explain that Janis: I really weren't trying to take the piss, I don't reckon it's funny Janis: but none of my business either Jimmy: yeah but that's just it, I do 'cause it weren't a one off Janis: your dad's a cunt Janis: I know that much Jimmy: to me 'cause I Jimmy: just to me like that Janis: I'm glad it's not the kids Janis: really glad Janis: but you know I'm not gonna like Janis: tell Janis: not that I want that for you or anything Janis: but I'm not stupid, I know that wouldn't help fuck all Jimmy: I'd never let him Jimmy: not to them Janis: I know Janis: you look after them really well Jimmy: I couldn't do nowt when it was my mum but she started as much shit as him Jimmy: they were both just Janis: Not what they should be Janis: or where Janis: yeah Jimmy: it kept getting worse Janis: 'then your mum left? Jimmy: it couldn't go on like that Jimmy: something had to change Jimmy: it did Janis: but instead of fixing it's just Janis: a different kind of fucked Jimmy: 'course Janis: That's shit Janis: you deserve not fucked up, not saying I can give you that or anything useful but for the record Jimmy: life is Janis: yeah Janis: got no evidence to the contrary Jimmy: you know when you're a kid and you hid under the blankets, that's still me Jimmy: 😎 or 📷 instead Janis: at least you stay put Janis: braver than running Janis: my speciality then and now Jimmy: 1. where am I gonna go? Back to my mum or my ex ain't options Jimmy: 2. Cass and Bobby need me where they are Janis: 1. anywhere they ain't Janis: 2. that's the problem Jimmy: There's no bravery in nowt I do Jimmy: at least you're doing something Janis: I'd be doing something if I stayed gone Jimmy: Why haven't you? Janis: It's harder than you'd think Janis: There's some things you gotta do that I ain't ready to yet, I guess Janis: it's like killing yourself, yeah Janis: everyone reckons this shits the easy way out, but you blow your brains out or suck dick for a place to stay Janis: you know, just 'cos it's not brave don't mean it ain't hard to give into Jimmy: Yeah Janis: my sister did it Janis: properly Jimmy: she never came back? Janis: in the end Janis: at first she was the same though Janis: worse, she'd always be coming back just to see us and stuff, I don't do that, I just run out of places I can be too Jimmy: You can be with me Janis: You underestimate how little I can be with them Janis: thanks, still though Jimmy: You heard me Jimmy: You can stay Janis: you mean it, don't you Jimmy: I don't want you to leave Janis: I don't want you to either Janis: I don't mean here but Janis: me Jimmy: If I leave this town, I won't leave you Jimmy: he can only make me do the one Janis: Jimmy Janis: I'm glad I met you, even if it's because life is shit and Jimmy: I'm glad too, even if that's the only thing I've got to be glad for Jimmy: and it's closer to Easter Jimmy: and we ain't American Janis: alright shut up Janis: words are your thing, not mine Jimmy: they're a bit your thing Jimmy: I like talking to you Jimmy: and I work in retail so I don't like talking to anyone Janis: means a lot Janis: truly Jimmy: should do Jimmy: ask my ex, never communicate me Janis: that was the problem Janis: not the baby daddy drama Jimmy: she wouldn't have fucked him if I could string together a sentence, obvs Janis: he better be so daddy or what's she doing Janis: not that she asked me to judge her life and choices but here I am Jimmy: he's not Jimmy: but at least she never went for Ian Jimmy: as step mums go, not my top pick Janis: not as hot a concept as porn would have you believe, like Jimmy: he likes his missus a bit older, give him that Janis: got to have something going for him Janis: not enough but you know Jimmy: you'd fucking have to be legal drinking age for a date with him an' all Jimmy: imagine the #bants Jimmy: a few under the table snakebites ain't cutting through that Janis: 🤢 Janis: I refuse to think about a first date scenario altogether, nevermind an @iantaylor8 first date Jimmy: Fuck me, you've never done one Jimmy: right Jimmy: I'm taking you Jimmy: and we ain't leaving before every cliche is ✔ Janis: 😂 if only you'd known this when it was #sofakesoextra Jimmy: I know you better now Jimmy: you're gonna hate this, baby Janis: 🤤 Janis: that's what does it for me Jimmy: no 🤤 on the 1st date Janis: bit of 😋 then? Jimmy: we'll see Janis: playing it 😎 Janis: very apt Jimmy: can you do tomorrow? Janis: Why not Janis: if you're the perfect 😇 tonight Janis: free as a bird Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: Alright, I'll pick you up at 8 Janis: is that all the info I get? Jimmy: from my own door 'cause you're staying Janis: that makes me Jimmy: 😱😱😱 WHAT ARE YOU GONNA WEAR THOUGH Jimmy: I don't have a date outfit for you here Jimmy: oh no Janis: 🤞 Grace has gone 👻 'cos that was frightening Jimmy: where does your sister live? might need Grace's suitcase Janis: don't take the piss Jimmy: this is serious omg Janis: if you don't stop Jimmy: BABE Jimmy: how are you not freaking out? Jimmy: it's our 1st date Janis: I hate you Janis: #triggering me Jimmy: I'm soz Janis: felt that Janis: 🖕 Jimmy: baby, I'm so sorry Janis: well you should hide 'cos finally off that fucking bus Jimmy: You said I'm safe with you Jimmy: can't make me unsafe now Janis: let's see if I can stay mad at you, boy Jimmy: Challenge accepted, girl Janis: don't bring your new mate Jimmy: who? Janis: 👍 Jimmy: 😘 Janis: [comes at him] Jimmy: [outside or inside?] Janis: [a point lmao, let you decide where he is, she ain't gonna have much chill either way] Jimmy: [lets say he was waiting outside so he don't get sacked cos likewise] Janis: [let 'em have a moment] Jimmy: [a really extra moment cos emotions are running high] Janis: [truly, so much revealed] Jimmy: [it makes me die, what's it been days? weeks? boy ain't gonna have no secrets left] Janis: [when you just wanna talk] Jimmy: [she ain't the samaritans calm down please] Janis: [we know she wanna too it fine] Jimmy: [oooh can we say his shift is over so they can go shopping for date clothes and be cute nerds] Janis: [um yes] Jimmy: [yaaas just imagine she's expecting him to go back in and he does but to get his jacket like surprise] Janis: [so confusion but then #onboard for the #bants of it all] Jimmy: [not even telling her where they are going just like follow me lol don't get lost bab but then it's obvs] Janis: [when you get to just have fun for once, also changing room shenanigans are always the one] Janis: [and can actually get a 🔥 lewk] Jimmy: [literally if you don't get kicked out of at least one changing room for saucy behaviour and another shop for a playfight who are you tbh] Janis: [truly, remember you got a date with her 'rents tonight though, gotta try on some 'good boy' clothes (but ain't no one tryna make you buy them fr)] Jimmy: [just do it for the lols boy] Janis: [get on the bus to hell lads] Jimmy: [see how many old ladies you can offend] Janis: [heheheh gotta try and get it out of your system if you've gotta be good, obvs] Jimmy: [there's your excuse not that you need one] Janis: [truly, we all know you're doing the bare minimum later lol] Jimmy: [she should teach him more signing though cos cute] Janis: [a parent pleaser for sure, should also take a selfie with cali 'cos loling imagining it and then the relevant peeps, grace and mia tbh, can see] Jimmy: [omg yes mia would be fuming cos cali ain't here for her bye] Janis: [said as if she's graces' gf and they're being shady lmao] Jimmy: [thank god we didn't go that far] Janis: [no one needs that in their life] Jimmy: [especially Grace, I'm mean enough] Jimmy: [there should be a bus photoshoot cos he'd have his camera for homework and imagine how annoying] Janis: [big tut energy] Jimmy: [exactly then you can make out til they tut themselves to death] Janis: [soz you're bitter and can't remember being young and in love ladies] Jimmy: [one of them should say something judgey in irish cos always a thing that they think young peeps don't speak it] Janis: [when you usually pretend you can't speak it but you can and you say something sassy back] Jimmy: ? Janis: she's just asking for your number Janis: but I told her to back off soz Jimmy: 💔 Jimmy: but lipstick on dentures is my top turn on Jimmy: fuck's sake babe Janis: you can 🤞 she's on the bus back 'cos won't be joining you with that attitude Jimmy: [😏] Jimmy: if you loved me you'd accommodate my kinks Jimmy: and ask to borrow her 💄 Janis: [turns away from him dramatically, but does actually ask, let us assume the lady is a moody hoe and is like no bitch though] Jimmy: [gives her a look like well? even though he knows the answer] Janis: [shrugs] Janis: your girlfriends a real bitch Jimmy: I am seducing someone else right in front of her Jimmy: what kind of dickhead Janis: then she's no third if she's gonna get all jealous Janis: have to stick with Pete Janis: what a shame, bye Doris Jimmy: 💔👵🎻👋 Janis: if you loved me you'd text him Jimmy: [does] Jimmy: you've got an audition next week Jimmy: 👍 Janis: [just looking at him like bitch you better not lmao] Jimmy: [shows her the text loling cos obvs he has not it'd just be a work question or whatever] Janis: [shoves him but is too loling] Janis: he's the one auditioning tah Janis: don't put it like that though, don't sound very nice Jimmy: [when you're 😏 but inside you're 😒] Janis: [just laying your head on his shoulder 'cos truly the longest bus ride] Jimmy: [playing with her hair as per because can never stop yourself] Janis: soz Jimmy: why? Janis: making you do this Janis: defs an IOU Jimmy: [shrugs and snuggles her more] Janis: you'll get it when it's happening Janis: [shrugs back] Jimmy: gotta start my homework some time Janis: what you gotta do Jimmy: 📷 and 🎨 you Janis: your teacher is gonna be sick of my face Jimmy: needs to give us less bollocks prompts then Jimmy: you're what interests me Janis: 😏 Janis: [but really 😳] Jimmy: and what's more significant than an IRL Romeo and Juliet obvs Jimmy: she should give me more marks for the nod to english coursework Janis: sure she will Jimmy: [another shrug but wrapping his arms around her then] Janis: ['you're good' in his ear from the snug] Jimmy: [when you're too white to 😳 and it not be obvs so you have to kiss her for distraction like close your eyes rn thanks] Janis: [not gonna say no, avert your gaze bus grandmas] Jimmy: [also stop the ILY curse for a bit so] Janis: [least they'll only take up one seat now instead of two 'cos defs getting on his lap, welcome everyone lol] Jimmy: [imagine taking that seat though oh hey] Janis: [just like 'scuse me thirdwheeling these teens] Jimmy: [it's a bad idea on many levels not least how turned on they are gonna be by the time they get to cali's but that's why I won't stop them lol] Janis: [have fun dealing with that or not] Jimmy: [mhmm] Janis: ['maybe we just stay on the bus'] Jimmy: [we all know whatever he wants to say it's just gonna be a shameless sound like always] Janis: [😏 'not a no' and kissing him harder like she cares about being quiet sure] Jimmy: [being extra as if to say do you want me to say no I don't think so] Janis: [just smiling into that kiss] Jimmy: [pausing to breathe and 😍 at her casually] Janis: [covering his eyes with her hands like don't look at me like that] Jimmy: [just loling] Janis: [pouting and hiding on his chest] Jimmy: [pouty lip kiss thing strikes again] Janis: stop being cute Jimmy: ['you' saying it out loud for the eye contact] Janis: [makes a noise 'cos don't know what else to do #overwhelmed] Jimmy: [kissing her neck but really soft cos lovebites aren't 😇] Janis: ['you're really gonna-'] Jimmy: ['what?' in her ear when he's kissed his way there] Janis: [shakes her head like nope, can't talk now bye] Jimmy: [doing whatever he can to make her say something/make a sound obvs keep looking away bus peeps] Janis: [saying 'shit!' just a bit too loud for these nosy ladies] Jimmy: they're gonna smack you with a shopping bag Janis: and when I get arrested for granny bashing, it'll be entirely your fault Jimmy: 😇 me Janis: no Janis: definitely not Janis: I think you just broke like, 4 seperate laws Jimmy: only 4? 💔 Jimmy: how many more stops is it? Janis: not a challenge, babe Janis: [looking out the window like ?! then 😒] Jimmy: could be if you come here Janis: ['we've already missed our stop so' collecting all their shit like] Jimmy: ['we had better just stay on here then' but helping] Janis: [just bitching like why didn't the driver say, I get off at the same stop everyday etc etc] Jimmy: [probably keep your mouth shut boy especially about how she wanted him to mind his business when she was on her way to you] Janis: [getting off this bus in a disgrace/huff] Jimmy: [🚬 guys you won't have chance when you get there] Janis: [try not to die in all the ways] Jimmy: [I'm loling cos he's carrying a plant] Janis: [lmao oh the effort to get left alone so you can get into more trouble again god bless] Jimmy: [just doing smoke rings like pay attention to me] Janis: [such a grumpy face] Jimmy: [putting the plant down so he can pick her up for a sec like don't be sad] Janis: ['I don't even wanna go and now we're gonna be late'] Jimmy: ['fashionably though' because remember all those lewks they tried on good times] Janis: [🙄 'you're not helpful' and picking up the plant like let's ride] Jimmy: [pouty face but on you go] Janis: [just smoke 'til you calm down a bit, babe, showing she is by slowing her pace so she's not running off] Jimmy: [nobody wants to do this its fine, bet Cali aren't buzzing at the prospect rn either] Janis: [probably not if they think he's some crackhead who tells her to steal cars lmao rude leave ur judgment at the door] Jimmy: [exactly] Janis: 💕 Janis: soz Jimmy: [holds his hand out like hold it please] Janis: [does] Jimmy: [swings it as they are walking] Janis: [😏 but more 😍 than smug 'always in babysitter mode, you' and nudges him gently] Jimmy: ['keep that between us, tah' cos he's not tryna babysit Gus or Diego lol or any of the cats] Janis: [mimes 🤐 'none of us are little enough, you're safe'] Jimmy: [shrugs cos Cass isn't either but hey ho] Janis: ['more feral than the cats, like, you'd miss yours so fast'] Jimmy: ['might do the dog' hilarious Jimothy we all know you don't hate Twix] Janis: [shakes head 'you play so hard to get'] Jimmy: [gives her a LOOK 'but I don't have to, since we're already late' pulls her into him using their linked hands, don't squash the plant boy] Janis: [a LOOK right back but close up 'cos now you are 'not meant to be being cool, remember'] Jimmy: [just staring at her really saucily like well then you'll have to do it for me] Janis: [looking at his lips like #distracted 'can't kick the habit, like'] Jimmy: [#same on both counts 'me either' just leaning in so much without actually kissing her] Janis: [making a noise of frustration like come on 'we could always be more fashionable'] Jimmy: [looking her up and down 'you couldn't be more... and back up to her face 'you're so...'] Janis: [taking his hands and putting 'em where he was looking] Jimmy: [finally kissing her so intensely because you're the most alone you've been all day] Janis: [make the most of how middle of nowhere it is for once] Jimmy: [a mood and a moment] Janis: [breaking off sporadically to tell him how hot he is, how much you want him etc etc, everything but ILY] Jimmy: [we all know we aren't getting actual words out of him rn except her name sometimes so pop off sis] Janis: [oh you two] Jimmy: [what a day and you're not even there yet] Janis: [lmao, thank god you're just going over for dinner, not like out out 'cos you're getting later by the minute here] Jimmy: [not to mention what you're gonna end up looking like after this] Janis: [her hair always be looking wild 'cos of you boy, such a giveaway] Jimmy: [that scalding tea there boo] Janis: [how to stop you, always fun lololololololol] Jimmy: [lets be nice and not haha just be late af] Janis: [you saucy onion] Jimmy: [it's been a minute since the changing rooms and yolo] Janis: [only 15 once henny] Jimmy: [only felt like this once too so they deserve it] Janis: [the lurve is so real truly she does not know what to do] Jimmy: [god bless] Janis: [how did we do the ily last time] Jimmy: [basically she got drunk and said it cos it was when he challenged her to outdrink him but he didn't say it back then cos couldn't and she was like don't forget I said it though but then he said it as they were falling asleep that night] Janis: [we've done so much] Jimmy: [hence we did to decide if we're keeping any of it cos rn none of that's happened] Jimmy: [*need] Janis: [it's all still here at least we can mix and match whatever we wanna baby] Jimmy: [yep] Janis: [for now, finish ya business and get gone] Jimmy: [honestly hurry up] Janis: [that's not what she said] Jimmy: [oh boo you funny fish] Janis: [hheeheheh but get ready for the awks lads] Jimmy: [oh lord he doesn't know what he's getting into here] Janis: [when you hate your parents, being so fake nice tonight henny] Jimmy: [cali will be shook] Janis: 👍 Jimmy: you alright? Janis: take the compliment Janis: doing well Jimmy: 🥇 us Janis: just like old times Janis: all this acting Jimmy: just like old times Jimmy: you talking bollocks Janis: charming Janis: its called conversation Janis: my wit is sparkling Jimmy: is it? Janis: you x2 ing that or gonna specify Jimmy: you heard Jimmy: and that weren't an answer Janis: yes to both, obviously Janis: why are you being rude Janis: just 'cos you can't to them? Jimmy: I'm not Janis: doubting my wit is rude Janis: tah Jimmy: show me it then Janis: Jimothy! Janis: shocked AND appalled Jimmy: 😂 Jimmy: that's not the one, babe Jimmy: Jamie got closer Janis: Don't remind me Janis: miss him Jimmy: 💔 Jimmy: ouch Jimmy: after everything I did for you out there in the middle of nowt Janis: really Janis: you're gonna remind me of that right now Jimmy: you should miss me Janis: I can't miss you more than I already do Jimmy: challenge accepted, Juliet Janis: [looking at him over the table like what you gon' do] Janis: ? Jimmy: [eye contact ftw] Jimmy: 😇 me Jimmy: [but under the table he's being a 😈] Janis: I hate you so much Janis: [when you're suddenly so focused on your meal like nothing to see here] Jimmy: how much? Janis: [shifts down in her seat/closer to what he's doing like 'that much'] Jimmy: [goes harder because of course] Janis: You're so Jimmy: go on Jimmy: I'm what? Janis: you're really really Jimmy: [stops like tell me] Janis: [imagine the grumpy face, cali like ?] Janis: hey Jimmy: ? Janis: now I really don't like you Jimmy: [just eating like 😏] Janis: [footsie like pay attention to me] Jimmy: [a look because he can't resist and we know it] Janis: [going from 😒 to 😏] Jimmy: [when Cali are talking to you and you have to pretend you're listening, thank god for all that practice he's had at customer service Janis: [lmao that fake smile taking you so far rn] Jimmy: [also v proud of him for eating whatever the food is because lbr its not gonna be what he's used to] Janis: [right, she would've told caleb not to do anything weird af but still] Jimmy: [and he hasn't thrown anything at her which is his fave thing to do] Janis: [imagine] Janis: so Janis: what's your verdict Jimmy: needs 🍅 sauce, obvs Janis: 😂 Janis: meant my parents, but if you hate 'em, start there Janis: he'll 😢 Jimmy: they're alright Janis: 🤔 Jimmy: I dunno Jimmy: weird but I'm used to you, like Jimmy: weirdest girl about Janis: piss off Janis: nothing like either of 'em Jimmy: never said you were Janis: better not Jimmy: come on Jimmy: that northern, not that thick Janis: didn't say you were Janis: you just like being mean to me Jimmy: don't sound like me, that Janis: must be thinking of Jamie then Janis: which one are you again? Jimmy: I were gonna say we can still be mates then 💔 Jimmy: there's my answer Janis: ah Janis: my good pal Jim Janis: I remember Jimmy: 👍 Janis: [squeezing his hand] Jimmy: [draws a heart on her with his fingertip because he always used to do that and I've not] Janis: [when that makes you 😳 more than anything else] Jimmy: [writes 'you' in it cos close to ily as we can get rn] Janis: [when you have to excuse yourself for a hot sec] Jimmy: [when you're like oh shit shouldn't have done that cos you think you scared her away] Janis: won't leave you with them too long Janis: brb actually Jimmy: 👌 Janis: 💔 it'd be too 😈 and obvious for you to come find me rn Jimmy: I could fake choking to 💀💀💀 Jimmy: or 🤢🤢🤢 Janis: you're so committed to your role Janis: it's impressive Janis: but I want more time than that'd give us so Janis: [coming back don't be gone forever] Jimmy: [just staring at her shamelessly soz the in-laws] Janis: [sitting next to him instead of opposite 'cos an abudance of chairs to choose from deal lads] Jimmy: [kiss her cheek cos that's 😇] Janis: [is 😊 but whispers 'I miss you' whilst she's there] Jimmy: [tucking a strand of hair behind her ear like just being helpful and 😇 don't mind me] Janis: [so 😍 hurry this meal along tah bring out the dessert lol] Jimmy: [oh and does the thing where you pull the chair in to get her close to the table but also pulling her chair closer to his at the same time] Janis: [issa must, as close to sitting on him without actually] Jimmy: [and just like I'll casually leave my hand on your leg what a coincidence] Janis: [makes a 😋 noise like she's really enjoying this dessert but we all know] Jimmy: [is clock watching hardcore like when can we leave lol] Janis: [least you can just do the bare minimum here, hang in there kids] Jimmy: I miss you too Janis: you can show me Janis: when I'm showing you how grateful I am Jimmy: [just biting your lip like this is fine yep] Janis: [😏 then signing something at Diego who is presumably there chilling] Jimmy: ? Janis: [cue cali asking him about his art homework 'cos she was asking if they can use the space/his lights and shit] Janis: escape plan activated Jimmy: now I really like you Janis: show me that too Janis: not just a 🥇 muse tah Jimmy: or a 🥇 face Jimmy: 🧠🏆 you Janis: careful Janis: my head might not fit through the door Jimmy: I'll carry you through 👰 style Jimmy: about to ask if I can 💍 you obvs Janis: you don't reckon that's 😈 nah Janis: not the 40s up in here Jimmy: what can be more 😇 than the sanctity of them vows before god 🙏💕 Jimmy: when in 🍀 do as the paddys do Janis: you're really turning me off here Janis: 😏 Janis: god can watch but he don't need to get involved Jimmy: [does something to turn her on like am I though] Jimmy: found our 3rd then 🙌🎊 Janis: he was in our 💕 all along Janis: and please tell them we need to go now Jimmy: [does like oh we have to get started because we can't miss our bus home/get back too late etc] Janis: [does the thing where you make glasses with your fingers to 🤓 at him as they're walk/running out] Jimmy: [nudges her like oi] Janis: [kisses him so hard when they're barely out of sight like wait] Jimmy: [doing that walking but still kissing thing but kissing so hard that they just knock into a wall/door casually so obvs just gonna push her up against it and kiss for a bit] Janis: [lmao Pablo needs to walk past bye] Jimmy: [10000% yes] Jimmy: [wasn't even there for dinner but appears right then haha] Janis: [this fam comes and goes as they please no consideration lol] Jimmy: [true facts poor Caleb food is his love language Pablo how dare you] Janis: [also you're his chef child, probs out spending all your money doing who knows what] Jimmy: [those debts don't just appear overnight so yeah] Janis: [fun and games honey] Jimmy: [this fam 💔 me] Janis: [honestly, like way to prove everyone right guys] Jimmy: [fuming about it as if we didn't do this lol] Janis: [at least you two are enjoying yourself rn] Jimmy: [speaking of is there anything else we wanna do here?] Janis: [we probably know the vibe, see if we can find HW pics]

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punkscowardschampions · 5 years

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Indie & Rio

Indie: can we chat? Rio: 'Course we can Indie: you still mad tho? Rio: No Rio: Serious Indie: me either Indie: my heart b heavy but not w that Rio: What's wrong, babe? Indie: all things Indie: its bad here Rio: How bad? Indie: dred like i dont wanna drag you back in but i cant cope w it Rio: Don't worry about me Rio: I'll have to sort some stuff here but how soon do you need me back Rio: and what can I do 'til then, like Indie: let me be w you i wont 2s mckenna or no thing Indie: but i gotta be out Indie: theres too many fucking situations Rio: alright Rio: of course Rio: i'll sort the uber now, where am I sending it Rio: is it the things i know or has something else, or multiple something else's happened? Indie: [sends random ass location because honestly where the fuck she wanna be rn] Indie: theres more and worse Indie: how you want it? Rio: First tell me you're safe Rio: then tell me however's easiest for you Indie: I'm proper high rn are they gonna let me come to london? Rio: Yeah, obviously don't bring anything but if it's gone it's gone Rio: You'll be fine Indie: safe Indie: i got none left to bring Indie: it been like that Rio: Damn Rio: Say no more, but do Indie: i get why my ma werent trying to do nothing but this Indie: cept its there still when you come thru Rio: That's the problem Indie: cant keep it goin innit cant keep no thing goin Indie: cant keep drew from wildin acting like a younger bringin feds to my door and my boy on my back cos hes fave target Indie: neither chatting to me like i done this Indie: did i? idk Rio: Nah, you didn't Rio: I can't even expand on it because just no, how could it be you Indie: thats how the boy treating me like i livin for the drama Indie: but the feds want drew in the pen & thats how he want it cos theres nothing left for him to fuck up in these ends Indie: i cant stop it none Rio: That ain't you though Rio: and who would be about this shit, it's the worst Rio: As for Drew Rio: I'm sorry Rio: We've been here before, there's no talking to him when he's in that space Rio: and that isn't on you Indie: every day we on this he be spitting angry at me throwing shit around but acting like im the one creating Indie: its too hard Indie: and yeah then theres drew back on his bullshit Indie: w the only apology yours to hold cos he aint offering Indie: i want him gone & i put that out into the universe so mayb i did it Indie: this is proper gone tho & that baby gonna be born soon Rio: Oh babe Rio: He don't know you like that, he shouldn't be treating you like that, standard Rio: even if you were the biggest drama queen in the world but you ain't and he got you so fucked up on that Rio: Nah, he's doing it all himself, even if you thought you wanted it or still do if not this way Rio: you can't make him do the dirt he do, or make him not Rio: The baby will be good, it'll have it's Ma and Bea is staying with her still and everyone else, you know it'll be okay Rio: what about you though baby Indie: how i let him chat to me that way? who am i rn? wtf Indie: i just want our yard back and you back and things to be what they were Indie: but its not Indie: cos even if we there what kinda ma she trying to be for real? im spinning out but like where in the universe is she @ Indie: & none of this is gonna hurt you most Indie: thats the last thing i aint chatted Rio: We've all put up with shit we shouldn't have Rio: 'cos we thought it'd pay off Rio: You ain't alone in that, nor does it make you less you even if it makes you feel less altogether Rio: I can try to talk to Drew, about the flat, idk if I can make that happen but if he goes jail he loses his lease, he only kept it in the past 'cos his boss' would pay it if he dealt inside, like but he ain't got the clout he used to have Rio: accept it or nah, no doubt we could chat about me taking it on if it comes to that but i ain't making promises Rio: I know but, you gotta trust we will all be there for damage control Rio: we're all alright ish, yeah? Rio: Go ahead, babe, I can handle it Indie: i got caught up cos i wanted someone to be for me & about me one time & everyone else has somewhere to lean Indie: you and mckenna being goals in my face Indie: everything else was a mess but i just added Indie: and now she has Indie: cos what i gotta tell you is bills told me edie be gone Indie: hardcore packed up and run out Rio: i know there's nothing i can say to make you feel less shit about it but i swear to you babe, we've all been there Rio: you know i have Rio: it doesn't make it better for you but it ain't your fuckup, it's one we all go through to grow through, yeah? no bullshit Rio: she did talk to buster but Rio: i didn't think it'd be anything more than normal Rio: i'll tell ma Indie: i reckoned bills was gonna cry she was carrying that much worry Indie: i aint no what to tell her Rio: I'll talk to her too Rio: I don't know what I'll say but Rio: it'll be alright, we can sort this Indie: i been swerving dem all hard as you Indie: more than she got detention for how hard she was trying to hit me up she said Indie: doing everyone the dirtiest ever why i gotta leave Rio: I can't blame you Rio: This shit is hard Rio: and painful Rio: I'm sorry I left you alone Indie: he aint try and fuck me i got no excuses Indie: [sends selfie] am I 😢 I can't feel it so what you seeing? Indie: not trying to be out here in the wild 💔😭 Rio: Baby calm down okay, you're good Rio: Your flight is booked and the uber is en-route Rio: I sent all your deets to you, all you gotta do is get here Rio: we're gonna sort all this okay and the shit we can't we gonna make bearable at least Indie: i dont have anything tho cant b living in mckennas garms after the last Indie: he gon b mad enough im rolling up likely Rio: No he won't Rio: I got plenty of shit you can borrow don't stress on that Rio: Nance has got a mental wardrobe here too Indie: o yeah other mckenna Indie: always sleeping on her living there too Indie: she aint but she do Rio: Exactly, I've had to borrow her bed loads of times before and you know they living that en-suite life Rio: you can stay for as long as you need Indie: innit what school gon do put drew in prison? 😂 Rio: Tbh Rio: In the grand scheme of things, that doesn't matter rn, soz teachers Indie: ill screenshot them words like my ma says Rio: I missed you Indie: safe cos imma be in your face soon Rio: wish it was under better circumstances, like Rio: but we'll get there Indie: @ the age to have a breakdown once a wk soz bout it 😂 Rio: that i can handle Rio: nothing that a pint of ben & jerry's and some chill time can't Indie: warn mckenna to lock up his squad & we all good Rio: 😏 Will do Rio: he's not really rolling with them rn so temptation should be outta the way Indie: 😍💍 be like Indie: i feel it Rio: Erm I ain't that hoe 😣😂 Indie: theres how you say & how you do bitch 😏💘😂 Indie: 👀 you from the front row in a few Rio: 🙄😔 am I really that bad Indie: nah nah Indie: mckenna be amp as Indie: its a good link Rio: Yeah but I mean Rio: do you feel like I've been ignoring you Rio: pre you know, that bullshit Indie: allow it babe Indie: you never done nobody that way Rio: Promise Rio: 'cos that ever what I was trying to be Indie: you always on the clock & your game Indie: trust Rio: Alright, 'nuff about me Rio: is there anything else you need, either now or for when you get here? Indie: gon need to grab my shit while 👻ing this boy Indie: standard juggle Indie: if hes been holding that long & not dashed it out ill break in Rio: You're gonna take some mates with you, yeah? Indie: bitch please i dont need the lads knoing my business that hard Rio: is it a good idea tho, even if he got his own van u kno they all got each other's backs, like Rio: be careful, all i'm saying Indie: they aint gonna call the feds on me man Indie: ill leave it til im back need a clearer head than this for a lock pick Rio: Yeah, don't worry 'bout it now Rio: anything replaceable we can sort now Indie: im not tryin to lose my head over things rn Indie: if imma be in london i got what i need Rio: That's the main thing Rio: and I ain't gonna come at you with 20 questions either, like Rio: space can include from me, just lemme know what you're feeling Indie: i been had enough space from you girl Indie: i miss you Rio: was hoping you'd say that Indie: i love you more than Indie: thats the mood Rio: i love you too Rio: no outs Indie: dont lets lose each other again Indie: 💖💖 Rio: never 🧡 Indie: how long this uber tryna be im 😫😫😫 Indie: imma b sleepin on this wall like i kicking it nursery rhyme vibes Rio: it's saying it's nearly there on the app Rio: if you gonna crash at the airport make sure you near the gate tho Indie: safe Indie: o sick idea Indie: the plane not trying to be up long enough for that shit tho innit Rio: legit its as quick as the bus into town like Rio: be here in no time Indie: its a madness Rio: yeah, see, it's not that far really Indie: feels like Indie: but mayb thats just how i want it so i can 👻 this town harder than afore Rio: it's far enough for that Rio: ain't letting drew out the country are they Indie: 😂😂😂 Indie: not less they start deporting crooks old school like when 🐨 country just one big pen Rio: He wishes Rio: always got his top off like we living that life here Indie: fr like he needs a tan to appear more peng nah nah Rio: if we wanna get a new wifey Rio: least if she out there we unlikely to be related to her so go off Indie: true true Indie: unless he tryna head to spain for my nan we all good Rio: 😬 Rio: yikes, not a mental image we need Indie: idk i hear she keeps things tight & fresh Indie: hes done worse Rio: Stop 😩 Rio: 'less you gonna bring me one of them sick bags Indie: get you a straw donkey when he drag me out there for the 💒 Indie: i got you Rio: when u don't wanna be nan but u down to be ma Indie: least she too old to put a 👶 in Indie: & it aint like being down to be ma is top of his list for how he want his wifeys Indie: that ones just for you like Indie: ro not trying to mother me no mind the one she growing rn Rio: Fair Rio: Willing to put up with his shit and mother him is clearly more vital Rio: 'low it with the mommy issues like he's the only one going without Rio: twat Indie: o snap Indie: just cos yours aint want you boy dont mean you gotta kill mine tho Rio: o snapped too soon Rio: but he ain't get snapped on enough for that Indie: when he offering you dem same goodies ☠ Indie: thanks dad Indie: you a real one Rio: waste Rio: he's so fucked Indie: i was 👍 Indie: down & out Indie: what that make me? Rio: you a kid Rio: not chatting down to you, but you allowed to be is what I mean Rio: he's grown and he caused your shit, he should know and do better so you could Rio: literally his job Indie: idc now if he show up for astrid thatd do man Indie: grown past him still Rio: Yeah Rio: we'll have to wait n see if he can be arsed to prove himself Rio: idk if he's been allowed near since you know Indie: not from what ive 👂 Indie: coulda changed since he stopped chatting at me tho Indie: or he coulda just been chattin it so it dont look his fault he swervin Rio: wouldn't blame them from keeping him away rn, your hormones are fucked and she's never had much sense when it came to him Rio: but i don't know if it's a forever deal or what Indie: i can see her lawin it cos he burned her so hard w this Indie: proper owned Indie: she aint tryin to let you come thru & you fam so Rio: well you know Indie: cant call her out that hard when it aint that different from how my ma tryin to be when Indie: they all 🤡 for him Rio: yeah Rio: i don't get it Rio: whatever, he's good looking Indie: so your da he aint a wasteman w it Rio: it's easier to be treated like shit sometimes though than accept the love init Indie: call out 🔫 at me bitch Rio: not what i was going for Rio: just saying he ain't special with it, we all do it Indie: 👀 you Rio: 😏 shh Indie: 😂 Rio: neway Rio: he's out, yeah? Indie: innit Rio: 👍 Indie: how you livin Indie: gimme dat 411 Rio: yeah good tbh, the place where i work is cool Rio: i'm just doing promo stuff 'cos i don't wanna get too into anything obvs but it's fun, not dry like the angel was getting Indie: sick! they gonna let me in or ⛔ Rio: see what i can do Rio: sure we get u made up no one gonna be too amp Indie: dont 🤡 me Indie: keep it 💋 Rio: oi don't be doubting my skillz Rio: you ever seen me out like that 😂 rude Indie: doubtin my ability to carry all that Indie: you ever seen me in 👠 bitch Rio: you don't need 'em when you out with me Rio: only just be touching your height in mine so Indie: 😂😂😂 Rio: 😣 be looking stupid short 'round here Indie: you will stand w mckenna Rio: what i'm sayin Indie: 😍 gotta travel far 💖💖 baby Indie: good thing he extra too Rio: 😂 Indie: hows the love Rio: I don't wanna be extra about it at you Rio: but it is good Rio: and no one totally flipped shit on it so Indie: im not that 💔💔💔 you cant speak on it Indie: boy dont get to do me dirty and keep me pining long Rio: That's my girl Rio: 💪 Indie: throw shit @ me again he gon catch these hands Rio: serious, what a cunt Rio: he ain't gonna have the chance Indie: do me a solid & dont tell the fam yeah? your ma only just calmin after wanting to merk drew Rio: 'course Rio: you got it handled Rio: they don't need to know every little thing Indie: i did nearly run there the other thinkin i was gonna be baby'd up same time as my step ma near Indie: but nah 🍀 Rio: remind me to take you drs yeah Rio: 😰 Indie: its chill i not letting any lads near me in the 24 or out of Rio: still, with your memory, i don't think the pill is the one we'll get you the implant maybe Rio: or the coil, they last time Indie: sexy Indie: he was wrapped but it got fucked up idk was wild Indie: get them posho london drs to sort me 😂😂😂 Rio: nah you wanna be the one in control of that shit babe trust Indie: 👑👑👑 Indie: i feel that Rio: boys be mad dumb that shit could be old or ripped there's no telling Indie: fr 😒😒🙄🙄 Indie: he only got a year on me too idc how many girls he tryna chat he been w he dont kno that much Rio: You can defs take off at least 20% of whatever he chatting Rio: Trust Indie: serious? Rio: Probably Rio: or think about how many of them were like Rio: 5 minute fumbles at parties and shit Rio: doesn't really do much for your game even if its a numbers booster Indie: tell me mckennas i wont say shit to him swear down Rio: 😂 i would but idk Rio: i ain't asked Indie: girl WHAT Indie: bitch imma do it for you Indie: we taking off like 90% for him 'cause how he like to chat or nah? Indie: 😂😂😂😂 Rio: I can imagine like, I don't need confirmation Rio: Poor baby 😂 Indie: do he kno your numbers? Rio: Nope Rio: 'less he tryna keep track like that which I doubt lmao Indie: its jam we can keep em on 🔒 Rio: Idc I'd tell you Rio: but he ain't wanna know trust Indie: boy too jel Indie: how they all be Rio: you know Indie: drew be tellin me how to do w my body like he something to me so we can let mckenna stand Rio: yeah that's a whole nother thing Rio: that ain't cute or wanted Indie: he aint 😂😂😂 Rio: truth hurts 😂 Indie: innit tho Rio: ur uber says its there so pull up Indie: i be waving to someone Indie: gotta b Rio: kinda excited even though it's cos everything is shit Indie: it me you gotta be hype 💖💖💖 Rio: That's alright then 😘 Indie: what mckenna say bout it? Rio: He's cool, gonna talk to his Dad so we don't have to Rio: getting food too to show he can, like Indie: trying to flex o boy Rio: ever since you dissed him Rio: gotta get good Indie: he need be told 👌 Indie: bring 🍔 🍕🍟 any of Indie: it aint hard if you smart Rio: idk if he taking orders but i'll let him know 😏 Indie: hit him w a screenshot and add 🥊 or 💪 Indie: 💍💍💍 life be like Rio: You have no idea babe Rio: getting it from both of yous again now 😜 Indie: is it? he wearin the 👖 thats how you 😍😍 Indie: i been knew Indie: 💘💘💘 Rio: Shut up 😩 Rio: That just how it be in the bedroom don't get it twisted Indie: 😏😏 when he such a daddy you let him wear the 👑 out 😏😏😏 Rio: yeah you lucky you still a flight away Rio: 🥊 'fore 💋 forreal Indie: 😂😂😂😂

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punkscowardschampions · 5 years

Text

Jimmy & Janis

Jimmy: Alright? Janis: Not too shabby, Jimothy Janis: How about you? Jimmy: Been better Jimmy: You know 😏 Janis: Goes without saying Janis: we both make do like but all things considered Janis: think it was 'reet' as you would say Jimmy: You're so full of craic Jimmy: No wonders I miss you already like Jimmy: But yeah it was alright Janis: 🍀 Janis: Take the compliment even though with present company its not asking much of me is it Janis: No shade to Cass or Bobs Jimmy: Want another, do ya? #thirstyworkthis Jimmy: Full of 'em thankfully Janis: Who you calling thirsty?! 😉 Jimmy: Denying it? Jimmy: Bold move Janis: Your word against mine Jimmy: Fair. You are louder than me Jimmy: Gonna get drowned out Janis: 😳 Janis: Prick! Janis: Not my fault that you just grunt like a caveman at all times Jimmy: If you aren't about it, do something about it, mate Jimmy: Just saying 😏 Janis: Ha.. what, teach you proper English? Janis: Not sure I got the time or dedication to the cause tbh 🤔 Jimmy: Nah you haven't got the vocab 🇮🇪 Jimmy: Need more than 🍀 is the drama Janis: 🖕 Janis: Drama is the only subject you're about, more like Janis: not working with an unwilling pupil Jimmy: You can't be my muse across every subject, mate Jimmy: So thirsty like Janis: Ugh Janis: I hate you Janis: So glad you're not here now Jimmy: Can't shut me up from this far away though Jimmy: We both know you've got means otherwise Janis: Such a blatant hussy Janis: all becomes clear now 😂 Jimmy: Skerries brings it out in me Janis: Well what happens in Skerries, like Jimmy: Shit. Hang on Janis: Okay Janis: Is it? Jimmy: Sorry Jimmy: As you were Jimmy: What did I miss? Janis: Damn, didn't hear me lamenting under ya window? Janis: Guess the thirst isn't THAT real Janis: You good? Jimmy: Funny Jimmy: Shame you weren't, could've caught me when I was tempted to throw myself out dramatically like Janis: That bad then? Janis: 'Cos you went away, like? Jimmy: My dad just had a weekend worth of opinions he simply had to share with me about how I've been spending my time Janis: I can imagine Janis: You aren't free childcare though Janis: I know my fam are lax about certain shit others aren't but he is taking the piss Janis: Right? Jimmy: It isn't like I even mind about looking after them, he's acting as if I'm desperate to be rid when I'd rather have 'em than leave them with him Jimmy: None of us wanna play happy families with him and his missus Jimmy: Have your fucking alone time Janis: Soon to be asking that, gotta be realistic Janis: Esp. with how little he's given the kiddos re. you're Ma Janis: What a headfuck, can't just transition seamlessly, son Janis: and as for the rest of that shite, he just KNOWS that'll make you feel guilty, Jim Janis: I don't know anyone who puts as much work in with their fam, he's not got a leg to stand on there, just knows what'll work on you, that's all Jimmy: yeah Jimmy: it fucks me off though, it really does Jimmy: Feels like ages since we went away already and I'm only just back through the door Janis: I know Janis: Sometimes I wish we could just take 'em and leave for good Janis: Not really though, I know that's a lowkey fucked thing to wish considering Janis: Not trying to be an insensitive cunt, just hate it when he gets to you, if I could do something about it forreal, I would Jimmy: You do Jimmy: Not trying to make you feel awkward bout it but you do really help me Jimmy: I wouldn't be able to hack half as much of this if you weren't about Janis: 'Course you would Janis: You did before, like, since you was 13 Janis: That's mental Janis: Don't usually wanna gas you up this much but you're fucking strong, and I know you had to for 'em but still are Janis: Own it, big 'ead Jimmy: Alright Jimmy: Still wish you were here though Jimmy: Or we were there Janis: Duh, I'm a delight Janis: and not going anywhere anytime soon so Janis: you're in 🍀 Jimmy: About time I had some Janis: That's the spirit Janis: just hit your Da with that quality bants 😎 Janis: won't have no comebacks, I bet Jimmy: 💪🏆 Jimmy: Sooner I can get my own flat the better Jimmy: Debating jacking school in but then who'd be there to get Mr Lucas' rocks off Janis: Won't someone please think about Mr Lucas n his needs?! Janis: Such a hero Janis: Forreal? Be a shame, like Janis: Not just for the art department Jimmy: I know. I wouldn't get to spend all day eye fucking you for starters Jimmy: 🎻 Jimmy: I dunno, sometimes it's the only peace I get from dickheads, kids and mad dogs but they aren't paying me to be there like Janis: Can't have you using your skillz on the CG punters instead Janis: Get restraining orders or their order over ya like Janis: Makes sense though, shame there ain't a compensation scheme like Janis: Maybe you could get run over and then say the Dr fucked you over Janis: double bubble Jimmy: Get your nan round to beat me up again Jimmy: Have a go too, be a hero, mate Jimmy: If anyone asked there was loads of 'em and I didn't see a single face, sorry Janis: 😂 Janis: and defs not a pensioner and a teenage girl either like Janis: probs the 'RA after you, like Janis: sell that shit to The Sun, boyo Janis: full of good ideas, me Jimmy: Quality Jimmy: I am gonna have to get another job at least Jimmy: any ideas there? Janis: Hmm Janis: Lets put our heads together Janis: What are your skills, Mr Taylor? Jimmy: 😏 Janis: 😒 Janis: There's a market for it Janis: Mia could be your sugar mama, play your cards right Jimmy: I'd happily go broke in that case Jimmy: Live in this box room forever like Janis: You got principles now? Janis: Didn't have 'em when you was sucking face with Tam 🤔 Interesting 😂 Jimmy: When Mia's concerned it's called common sense Janis: Don't reckon you got staying power to be nothing more than another flavour of the month? Janis: She does go through them, admirable in a way given all she's seemingly working against Jimmy: I know I haven't Jimmy: Kissed goodbye to my new boy appeal ages ago Janis: I dunno Janis: I still reckon you're alright Jimmy: 💕 Jimmy: Cute Janis: 🤢 Jimmy: [Sends a picture of Twix] Speaking of Jimmy: Absence has made the heart grow fonder for someone Janis: Real MVP Janis: been wearing you out instead of her Janis: You owe her, like 😜 Jimmy: I'm gonna bin off school Jimmy: I can make it up to her then Jimmy: Just for the day, keep calm dad Janis: Lol, really prove his point, like Janis: Teen's prerogative Janis: Fair though, I'm pretty knackered Jimmy: yeah why not Jimmy: you don't wanna come over to keep us both company then? Janis: You don't have to ask Janis: if you just wanna 💤 Janis: Not gonna be that bitch Jimmy: what kinda bitch you gonna be Janis: I've not decided yet, watch out world Jimmy: Keep me posted Jimmy: Twix needs to get a jump on her competition Janis: Look, baby girl, if its a competition between you and school then it is none Janis: but the lad here needs a break Janis: I'm soz 💔 Jimmy: 😎💪🏆 Jimmy: Challenge accepted Janis: You turning sleep into a sport now? Jimmy: Have you seen Twix when she gets going on a dream? #Athleticaf Janis: Aww 😍 Janis: why you taking on the champ, gonna have you picking up her shit- oh wait Janis: s'a dog's life forreal Jimmy: She was the one being #goals all along Janis: Truly Janis: can I come over actually Janis: I want to Janis: Call me thirsty all you wanna Jimmy: I want you here too Jimmy: We're even Janis: What was that? You actually admitting defeat? Janis: 😮 Janis: Never thought I'd see the day, Taylor Jimmy: Don't get used to it, like Jimmy: But I do owe you one for sorting Skerries Janis: I'll take it Janis: Even if it was hardly selfless of me like Jimmy: I'm alright with you being selfish if it means getting away from the shit Janis: Easily sorted Janis: S'my default, ask the fam Jimmy: I would but I'm gonna see how long I can carry on pretending families don't exist 😎 Janis: Not gonna say challenge accepted when you're being a good boy Janis: but I like the sound of that too Janis: plus, unfair, numbers wise Jimmy: You are at a disadvantage Jimmy: Never usually let that losing streak stop you though Jimmy: 😏 Janis: Fuck off Janis: Selective memory sore loser 😒 Janis: I got this in the bag anyway, you can't be cunty to kids Janis: I'm away there, all my fam be grown...ish Jimmy: You're gonna have to jog it for me cause all I see in my past are wins, mate Jimmy: Not that you can trusted if you've forgotten how much of a dickhead I am Janis: I know you find it hard to keep up with me but Janis: at least try, mate 😉 Jimmy: Don't have to. I'm a natural at beating you Jimmy: 💪🏆 Janis: 😑 Janis: I feel its my duty to inform you this isn't how you make girls like you, you know Janis: otherwise your chances of getting a new gf to stick are slim Jimmy: It's alright I don't want a new girlfriend Jimmy: And I know what works on the one I've got 😏 Janis: What a charmer Jimmy: You aren't denying it 😎 progress Janis: What's your game? Janis: Suspect Jimmy: No games Janis: Yeah right Janis: got my eye on you boy Jimmy: You always do Jimmy: 😎💪💕 Janis: 🕵 you're a shady character that's why Janis: could be a 36 y/o russian spy Jimmy: 😲 Jimmy: with this face? rude Janis: deep cover Janis: obvs want me for the olympics cos why else Jimmy: busted Janis: fans gonna be gutted Janis: never mind will they won't they Janis: rollercoaster from fake start to fake end Jimmy: We're gonna need new #s Janis: #whendimitriisnottheone #comradeBYE Jimmy: 😂 Jimmy: I'll get the vodka shots in Jimmy: Win you back like Janis: Not that easy Janis: but not gonna say no Jimmy: #thirsty Janis: how did we end up back here Jimmy: Too true for you to keep avoiding, mate Janis: what you think Janis: queen of avoidance Janis: won't see me for dust Jimmy: I'll see you tomorrow, babe Janis: Only by proxy Janis: 'cos my true love is there Jimmy: 🎻💔 Janis: Don't worry, we can still have mindless sex Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: Alright Jimmy: Done Janis: Heart healed real fast Janis: Called it Jimmy: I'm easy Janis: Didn't wanna say it, kid Jimmy: Ask Tam she'll tell you Janis: I bet she would Janis: Unlike you I do my best to avoid her though so no tah Jimmy: Don't know what you're missing there, mate Janis: Ha, you can get fucked Janis: I'm not having a threesome with you and Tam Janis: not even for the #drama Jimmy: what about for the #craic? Jimmy: You'd be lucky anyway she's only about me 😎 Janis: So jealous 😒 Janis: Twat Janis: How about a mmf threesome, bet YOU ain't so keen now Jimmy: Depends who you're considering Jimmy: If it's Mr Lucas I'm well in Janis: All fun and games now but you know he'd be way too down Jimmy: 😒 Jimmy: Too real Janis: Mhmm, that mouth gon' get you in trouble one day Janis: what am I gonna do with you, eh? Janis: 😇 over here Jimmy: I'm the bad influence like Jimmy: Take that dad Janis: Yeah, I'll just tell him, like Janis: Problem solved Janis: Please him no end having to have a chinwag with me 😂 Jimmy: 😂 Jimmy: done deal Jimmy: not like we're trying to avoid him or owt Janis: oh, just thought we were trying to avoid our own, like Janis: there goes my bruch goss sesh Janis: gutted Jimmy: Keep up, mate Jimmy: Gotta totally isolate ourselves for that teen angst cliche Janis: Umm Janis: 🚩 Janis: are you going to tell me next that no one else cares about me but you? and that I need to block everyone and give you my phone Jimmy: You can tell your fam that next time Gracie's blowing up your phone Janis: I'd pay to see her rescue mission but Janis: I'll let it get to the danger zone before I do anything, standard Jimmy: Fair Jimmy: Can't fault you there Janis: Give you time to get proper creeper Janis: up ya game Jimmy: I'll take that Jimmy: Challenge accepted as per Janis: G'wan then Janis: Don't scare easy Jimmy: I already figured that out Janis: Clever boy 😉 Jimmy: have my moments Jimmy: Don't even need school, see? Janis: Still wanna jack it in then? Janis: Let Monday pass, see how you feel Jimmy: I don't wanna really Jimmy: Just being a crybaby about being stuck under this roof Jimmy: 🎻 Janis: Fair Janis: I feel it Janis: You can always squat in the barn if you're quiet Janis: won't charge you Janis: much Jimmy: I can be quiet Jimmy: If you don't blow my cover we'll be alright Janis: Excuse me Janis: I'm stealth as fuck Janis: you know you got caught the other day yeah Janis: was saving your ego but Jimmy: Nah Janis: Did so Janis: you know Gracie got her 👀 peeled for you forever Jimmy: Damn Jimmy: Should've known that she'd still be obsessed with me Janis: You? Okay 👌🍆 Janis: watch you don't rub your shine off dickhead Jimmy: 😂 Jimmy: Thought you'd be buzzing she's switched her allegiance like Janis: Still not getting rid of her is it Janis: Unless you both run off into the sunset and leave me in peace Jimmy: Yeah alright Jimmy: You've got Twix you'll be sorted Janis: Like you give a fuck Janis: finally getting the twin you wanted all along like Jimmy: Naturally Jimmy: Just playing the long game Janis: Bit of a weird way to play it but Janis: this your usual approach? Jimmy: You're the first twin I've dated Jimmy: Lucky Janis: I really feel it Jimmy: [Sends a pic of Twix looking adorable] Jimmy: Bet you do Jimmy: 💕 Janis: Look at what you coulda had Janis: now you're gonna have to get a pug with my sister Janis: sad Jimmy: More of a cat person anyway like 😏 Janis: are you trying to get with my mum? Janis: sicko Jimmy: Nah just over mad bitches, you know Janis: Defs wanna avoid this entire fam then Jimmy: Nah their alright Jimmy: And not just by comparison Janis: Hmm maybe from the outside looking in Janis: They aren't but what am I gonna do, emancipate myself? I've got less cash and less of a place to go so not the brightest of ideas Jimmy: Guess we're stuck Jimmy: Twix has a lot of love to give but fuck all cash Janis: Preach Janis: Useless sugar daddy Janis: should take a leaf out my sister's book clearly Jimmy: Bit late for that Jimmy: You're too loved up Janis: Nah Janis: Tell Twix to speak for herself Jimmy: [sends a voice clip of Twix howling] Jimmy: Done Janis: 😂 Janis: aren't you in enough trouble rn boy? don't start her off! Jimmy: She's a bad bitch Jimmy: Can't be told Jimmy: I blame her training meself Janis: Oh, Twix, where you gonna go? Think on, girl Janis: Get what you pay for Janis: You want results, you gotta cough up for my services Jimmy: You can't need new kicks already, mate Jimmy: I know you've been shopping like Jimmy: The social's got you exposed Janis: What makes you think I was paying? 🤔 Janis: Mean she didn't buy you a 'round? Shame Jimmy: I know you weren't Jimmy: Gonna pay when Twix hears about it though Janis: Sure the flat whites are already hunting her down too Janis: Awkward Jimmy: Tam's probably trying to stretch her skin into a suit as we speak Jimmy: She's gonna need a touch of your luck I reckon Janis: Not your usual type, long and lanky then? Janis: That'll be a toughie but she's nothing if not determined, bless her Jimmy: Dunno I can't remember Jimmy: 🤷 Janis: Nice Janis: Such a gent Jimmy: I wasn't trying to be Jimmy: She bumped into me and we had a dance to make it less awkward Jimmy: Far as that politeness went Janis: No need to lie 😂 I'm not the one that's gonna be crying about it Jimmy: No need to be jealous cause I'm not Janis: Whatever, weren't together Janis: not against any unwritten rules or other shite Jimmy: Still Jimmy: If you were jealous, like at Cass' party, no need to be Janis: You what? Janis: I weren't, you were being rude, that's all Jimmy: Alright Jimmy: 🤷 Janis: Always wanting me to be jealous Janis: 😒 Jimmy: Nope, just saying Jimmy: I'm that dickhead like Janis: What dickhead would that be? Jimmy: A jealous one Janis: Nah Janis: You ain't Janis: why would you be? nothing to be jealous about Jimmy: Forget it Janis: Can't say that, never works, like Jimmy: There's a first time for everything though Jimmy: Worth a go Janis: 🤷 Janis: fine, hit you with the shrug right back Janis: be like that Jimmy: I'm not being like anything Jimmy: I just don't wanna say it. Okay? Janis: Alright Janis: What do you wanna say? Anything? Should I go? Jimmy: Don't Jimmy: It's not your fault like, being too good for me and that Janis: Are you mental? What are you even chatting Janis: Fuck leagues, not even playing the same sport, and I ain't bragging Janis: For once Jimmy: Bollocks Jimmy: You're fucking stunning like, and that's just looks Janis: 🙄 Janis: Please Janis: that's the start and end of my qualities Janis: don't even make the most of that, like Jimmy: Shut up Jimmy: It isn't Jimmy: And you don't need to, that makes it worse, or better depending on the lens you're viewing through Janis: I've told you, I know what I am Janis: Ain't under any illusion I'm a catch Janis: Not fishing for sympathy like Jimmy: I'm not throwing any sympathy out Jimmy: Or compliments, just facts Jimmy: You are a catch, mate Janis: Blatantly not 'cos no one else thinks or has thought so Janis: what I'm saying, there's nothing to BE jealous about Janis: no one gunning for you 'cos I'm off the market, is there Jimmy: Only cause they can't compete with how #goals we are Janis: Yeah, that's the joke Jimmy: It doesn't have to be Jimmy: I'm not laughing Janis: No? That might've been your reality but it certainly hasn't been mine Janis: There's a reason I was a 'dyke' with no friends, and those reasons haven't disappeared Janis: You would laugh, you do Jimmy: No Janis: Forget it Janis: I'm using mine now too Jimmy: Don't Jimmy: I don't want you to forget what I'm trying to say Jimmy: Even if I am messing it up Janis: you don't have to Janis: say anything Janis: just 'cos I'm being a fucking sad case Jimmy: I want to Jimmy: There's so much shit I wanna say to you, alright? Janis: But you don't know how? Janis: Alright, Liam, fucking hell Jimmy: He was on to something Janis: Maybe Janis: 😏 Janis: You don't need this though, my shit ontop of yours, forreal, so you can forget about it, alright? Jimmy: I'm not that much of dickhead Janis: Ugh, can't you try? Janis: Always claiming the title and now where is it when we need it, eh Jimmy: Sorry Jimmy: Got no control over it like that Jimmy: Basically none around you, like Janis: You mean that? Janis: No bullshit, no bants? Jimmy: You know I do Janis: Good Janis: 'cos me either Janis: and I am jealous, really jealous Janis: and you know that too, I know Jimmy: That's why you have to hear me out Jimmy: There's no reason to be Jimmy: I swear Janis: Alright Janis: I'll try Janis: Its not personal, but I know its shitty to be on the other end of it regardless Jimmy: Good Jimmy: I can't lie now, I quite like it Jimmy: Nobody's ever been that bothered about me before Janis: Well they're thick then Janis: I Janis: I dunno Janis: Not had anyone to myself before Janis: that I wanted to keep Janis: not letting go easy, like Jimmy: Don't Jimmy: Me and you. Alright? Jimmy: That's how I want it Janis: Alright Janis: I wish we had a place to go now too Janis: Bad Janis: out of the question storming out in a teen angst rage tonight? Jimmy: It's out of the question for me not to Jimmy: I'll take the car Jimmy: Find us a place Janis: You're already in trouble I guess Janis: Lets do it Janis: I'll be waiting outside Jimmy: I'll be right there Janis: 👌 Janis: what are our chances of sneaking me in though? 🤔 seems silly to come back home only to come back tomorrow like Janis: up for the challenge? Jimmy: Put a coat on it's freezing out Jimmy: You know it 💪🏆 Janis: Cute 🖤 Janis: but as I've pulled, will do Jimmy: Funny Jimmy: Got the car keys that's the first hurdle like Jimmy: Don't even need luck Janis: Thank God, like Janis: just that good, yeah? Jimmy: Yeah Jimmy: 💕

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