#but remus fucked up the summoning so they are stuck together

[zvdvdlvr]

teacher remus noticing reader is upset and asks them what's wrong after which reader basically comes out as trans (ftm)?

acceptance; remus lupin

synopsis: remus's student confides in him something that's been plaguing them.

warnings: PLATONIC RELATIONSHIP, father figure remus ong, trans (ftm) reader, f/n: friend name, f/n doesn't know y/n is trans

reader's pronouns: he/him

"y/n?"

y/n looked up. he had been stuck in That Feeling for the third day in a row now, and it was hurting him. he was forgetting to do basic tasks such as eat and make your bed. he was barely talking, and had no will to go to classes.

"yeah?" he croaked, suddenly aware of the class's eyes on him.

f/n eyed him. "are you okay?"

y/n nodded. "yeah, yeah i'm fine."

turning f/n nodded to professor lupin. "she's fine."

y/n visibly shrunk back at being referred to as "she". the fucking pronouns followed him everywhere, tormenting him and telling him he wasn't a "him", but a "her". it made him feel a way that he couldn't describe.

at least the lesson continued, and all eyes moved back to lupin.

y/n spent the rest of the class in an uncontrollable daze. his head was spinning, but not quite enough to want to get up and leave. though not soon enough, class was dismissed.

the milling of students past him finally grounded y/n back, but his name being called alarmed him.

"y/n? will you stay for a little bit?" professor lupin asked, scarred face patiently awaiting the answer he knows he'll get.

y/n swallowed. "yeah."

once the last pupil was out of the room, remus turned to his desk and waved his hand. within moments, two steaming mugs appeared side by side.

"cocoa?" the professor asked with a smile. "i know it isn't really the season for that, but i think you'd like this better than the tea i've been drinking lately," remus explains. y/n slowly stands up, and takes the cup from the professor's hands.

"oh don't worry. there's no truth serum in this, i solemnly swear." remus stated before taking a sip.

"so, dear child, what's been on your mind as of late?" remus finally asked.

y/n looked down, back slouched violently. "i- it's truly nothing. just stress, i guess."

it was a pity y/n was a bad liar when upset. "i won't judge. i simply want to know what the change in attitude is about," remus explained, eyes trained on the teen in front of him. "if this is a family thing... well, i had a friend who... if it's a family thing just say so and i'll leave you alone of you so please."

y/n felt horrible. he felt like the professor genuinely cared. and all the emotion in his voice was stabbing y/n in the heart. "i'm trans- transgender," y/n whispered, eyes to the floor.

he barely registered the mug being taken from his hand, or remus leading him gently to the floor, but he didn't realize he was openly bawling into his professor's arms. "i'm trans, professor," he sobbed, gasping on air.

remus soothingly shushed his cries, and patted his back in a fatherly way. it pained remus to see one of his favorite students so upset.

five minutes flew by. y/n sniffed miserably as he harshly wiped tears from his eyes. "are-are you gonna t-tell dumbledore?"

"would you like me to?" remus asked.

y/n shook his head.

"what do you go by?" remus asked quietly.

"still y/n but i'm thinking of going by something else. my, uh, pronouns, though, are he/him," y/n explained, fingers knotting together. he hadn't told anyone that he was trans. this was huge.

remus smiled. "would you like me to use your pronouns in front of the class?"

y/n nodded. he hadn't thought of that question, but maybe hearing his pronouns from his favorite professor would help validate him.

remus grabbed the desk to help him up. grabbing the teen's hand, remus pulled y/n up. "i may have... something that could help make your voice lower..."

y/n looked up, wide-eyed. "really?"

the professor smiled at y/n's glee. "yes. it's a potion that i can give you the recipe too, but i don't have the ingredients," remus explained, summoning some potion book.

flipping through pages, remus finally found the page. grabbing a piece of paper, remus enchanted a quill to copy down ingredients, the process of making the potion, and when and how to drink.

y/n gingerly accepted the paper. "i- i really don't know what to say, professor...'' he trailed off.

"just a simple assurance that you'll be smiling tomorrow is all i need," remus chuckled, nudging y/n gently in the arm.

y/n felt wholly accepted by professor lupin, and the feeling made him want to cry again.

but all y/n could do was smile in gratitude and hope lupin knew how much this meant to him.

#remus lupin imagine #platonic relationships #father figure #remus lupin x reader #remus lupin x male reader #angst to comfort #trans ftm #trans ftm reader #trans reader #harry potter #remus lupin x plus size reader #remus john lupin #remus loves sirius #tbh #slayed #slay bestie #defence against the dark arts #professor lupin #professor remus lupin #x reader #x male reader #x you

[thatonelesbianfander]

The Ghost and the Reaper Chapter 10

Fandom// Sanders Sides

TW// Major Character Death, Yelling, Shouting, Fighting, Violence, Knife, Swearing, Crying, Screaming

Word count// 2496

Description// Janus is one of the many grim reapers whose job it is to reap the souls of the dead and help them ascend to the afterlife. After one assignment, the spirit they reaped, a 23-year-old nonbinary person named Remus, refused to ascend. Now, Janus is stuck with them following it around wherever they go.

Characters// Remus Sanders, Roman Sanders, C!Thomas Sanders, Janus Sanders, Virgil Sanders, Logan Sanders, Patton Sanders, Nico Flores

Pairings// Slight Karrot Kings

AUs// Found/chosen family Creativitwins & C!Thomas, human!sides, they/them Remus, it/they Janus, he/she Roman

Author’s note// The second half of this chapter was fucking heart-wrenching to write. Enjoy!

Masterpost // Previous // Next

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Remus backed up a little, Roman also turning towards where Remus was looking.

”What… How did you-” Remus started.

”We’ve got a little spy on the inside,” Janus said, pointing towards the rebel reaper.

”Oh, you piece of shit,” Remus said, annoyed.

”Thanks for helping, Matt. You can go now,” Janus said, Matt nodding and fading from view.

”Roman, you get everyone to safety. Humans to their apartments, and spirits to the med bay. I’ll hold off these motherfuckers,” Remus said, summoning a knife. Roman nodded, rushing out of the cafeteria.

”Everyone. Go wild,” Janus said, the reapers scattering out of the wall and into the courtyard. Remus rushed at Janus, Janus grabbing their arm before Remus could stab them.

”Let’s duel,” Remus said. Janus smiled, pushing Remus away. Meanwhile, Roman was running around the courtyard, gathering people and taking them to the elevators. Reapers ran all around the courtyard, swiping their scythes at any spirit they could find. Roman ran to the elevators with a group of people, seeing Patton standing outside the elevators, surrounded by reapers.

”Move out of the way, kid,” the one reaper said.

”No! I’m not letting you into the med bay!” Patton refused. The one reaper raised their scythe, about to hit Patton with it.

”Patton! Catch!” Roman said, picking up a nearby hammer and tossing it. Patton caught the hammer, hitting the reaper in the head and throwing it at the other reaper. Roman ran over with his group of people, pushing everyone into the elevator.

”Okay, living to your apartments, dead to the med bay! We’ll be right up with supplies when we can,” Roman said. The people in the elevator nodded, the elevator doors closing. Roman took out a knife, standing beside Patton.

”You good, Patton?” Roman asked.

”Yeah, no reapers have gotten into the upper floors yet, so all we have to do is fend them away from the elevators,” Patton said, hitting another reaper with his hammer.

”Do you know where Virgil and Logan are?” Roman asked.

”Yeah, they’re gathering more people up,” Patton replied. Just then, Logan and Virgil ran up to the two, a group of people following them.

”Alright, everyone in the elevator! Humans to the apartments, spirits to the med bay,” Roman said, rushing the people into the elevator. Roman turned around, seeing a group of reapers quickly approaching the four of them. Roman grabbed out her knife, nodding to Patton, Virgil, and Logan before the four charged towards the reapers. The four fought the reapers, Roman tossing his knife at a few.

”Roman, duck!” Logan yelled. Roman ducked down, a knife flying past his head towards a reaper.

”Nice!” Roman said, Logan smiling and giving a thumbs up while dodging the scythe of another reaper. Roman pushed the reaper he was fighting to the ground, tossing another knife at their chest. The four backed up, coming together. They nodded at each other, running and tackling a group of reapers together. Roman grabbed Virgil’s hands, Virgil spinning him around and launching him at another reaper. Roman tackled the reaper, punching him in the face.

”Logan! Elevator!” Virgil yelled, a reaper nearing the elevator. Logan threw a rock from one of the planters at the reaper’s head, knocking him out before he could get into the elevator. The four regrouped near the elevator, Thomas and Nico running up to the four.

”Pa!” Roman said, running over to the two.

”Roman!” Thomas said, hugging Roman.

”Did you find anyone else?” Roman asked.

”No, we were just about to check the theatre,” Thomas replied.

”Okay. We might need to evacuate the humans… It’s starting to get dangerous. You two check the theatre and then come back here, we’ll try to hold the reapers off,” Roman said. Thomas and Nico nodded, running towards the theatre. Roman regrouped with the other three, handing them all new knives. The four got into a fighting stance as more reapers rushed towards the four.

The four rushed towards the reapers, fighting them while talking amongst themselves.

”So, what do you guys wanna do after this?” Roman asked.

”Hm, I don’t know… I was thinking maybe we could just watch a movie in the theatre,” Virgil replied, slicing a reaper’s face with their knife.

”Eh, that could get boring though,” Roman said.

”Ooo! Maybe we could play a game at the arcade? I heard they got a new DDR machine!” Patton said, hitting another reaper across the face with his hammer.

”Maybe… Logan, what about you?” Virgil asked.

”I don’t really know, I was just going to go along with whatever you decided,” Logan said, breaking his arm free from the reaper’s grip and punching them in the face.

”You know… I’m really glad I met you guys. I never really had any real friends during my childhood other than Remus, so it’s nice that you’re here,” Roman said, smiling.

”I’m glad we met too!” Patton responded, fighting off another reaper.

”Virgil! Watch out!” Roman said, Virgil ducking the flying scythe of a reaper. Virgil grabbed the scythe, tossing it back at the reaper and hitting them in the head.

”Don’t worry, I got this,” Virgil said, giving Roman a thumbs up.

”Alright, we should probably retreat deeper into the courtyard,” Logan said, looking at the group of reapers charging at the four.

”Agreed,” Virgil said. The four ran off, the reapers chasing after them.

”Shit, that hole that was blasted in the cafeteria was big, huh? There’s gotta be like, 20 reapers in this pack,” Logan said, tossing a knife at the reapers.

”Yeah. That stupid rebel reaper ended up being a spy and blowing up the wall in the cafeteria. I guess he heard about the explosion earlier today messing with the force field and used that to his advantage,” Roman said, starting to fight the reaper horde.

”I knew having a reaper in here was a bad idea,” Virgil said, punching two reapers in the face at the same time.

”Yeah, in hindsight, it probably wasn’t the best idea… But we thought we could trust him, so it seemed like a good idea then,” Roman said.

’Well, I think-” Logan started before being cut off.

”SHIT, SHIT, SHIT!” Virgil yelled. The other three turned to Virgil finding him on the ground in front of a reaper, slowly fading away.

”Virgil!” Roman exclaimed, throwing his knife at the reaper and rushing to Virgil’s side. Virgil collapsed into Roman’s arms, Virgil holding his arm.

”Shit,” Virgil said, looking down at his hand which was almost fully disappeared.

”Virgil…” Roman said, tears coming to his eyes. Virgil looked up at Roman, frowning.

”Hey, it’s okay. Everything’s going to be fine,” Virgil said, hugging Roman as best as he could. Roman hugged Virgil back.

”Thanks for being my friend…” Roman said, smiling sadly.

”You’re welcome,” Virgil said, fading completely out of view.

”Roman! Watch out!” Logan shouted. Roman snapped back to reality, Logan grabbing the scythe before it could make contact with Roman’s back.

”Fuck!” Logan yelled as the scythe cut into his hand.

”Logan!” Roman said, grabbing Logan as it fell. Roman looked up, looking around just in time to see Patton fade completely away. Roman looked up while holding Logan, her eyes darting back and forth. Roman screamed angrily as Logan faded completely away, getting up and charging at the reapers.

Meanwhile, Thomas and Nico ran through the lobby with the other people they collected from the theatre, running towards the elevators. The two pushed everyone in.

”Alright, you already know the drill. Humans to the apartments, spirits to the med bay,” Thomas said, the people in the elevator nodding before the doors closed. Nico turned to Thomas, worried.

”This isn’t looking too good, Thomas,” Nico said.

”I know, I know… Thomas responded, turning to Nico.

”What do we do now?” Nico asked.

”We should stay by the elevators. It seems like Roman and the others ran off, so we’re going to have to protect the elevators,” Thomas said. The two stood in front of the elevators in combat positions, ready to fight whoever would threaten them.

”Honestly, if we don’t make it out of here… I just wanted to say… I love you…” Nico said. Thomas looked over to Nico, red in the face from blush.

”I… I love you too…” Thomas said, smiling. Nico smiled back. Just then, the two heard Roman’s angry scream, turning to the other side of the courtyard.

”What was that?!” Nico said. The two looked around, seeing Roman barreling towards a reaper hoard.

”Roman!” Thomas exclaimed, worried. The two watched as Roman shredded through the hoard, running towards the two afterwards.

”Roman! Are you okay?” Thomas asked.

”Yeah. Is everyone in their places?” Roman asked.

”Yeah, everyone’s accounted for,” Thomas replied.

”Where are the others?” Nico asked.

”They got ascended while we were fighting that hoard,” Roman said, trying to catch his breath.

”Aww, Roman…” Thomas started.

”There’s no time for condolences. We’ve got to evacuate everyone. Grab a spirit from the med bay to teleport all the humans out of here to the surface,” Roman said.

”Are you sure?” Nico asked.

”Yes, I’m sure! Get a spirit from the med bay and get all the humans out of here!” Roman said.

”Nico,” Thomas said. Nico nodded, getting into the elevator and going up. Thomas took out a knife, walking over to Roman and putting a hand on his shoulder. Roman looked up at Thomas, confused.

”What are you doing?” Roman asked.

”You really think you’re going to fight this alone without your father by your side?” Thomas replied.

”Pa… Please just evacuate with the others…” Roman started.

”No, I’m not going anywhere. If we go down today, we’re going down together. Got it?” Thomas said. Roman nodded, smiling. She hugged her father, Thomas hugging back.

”Now, let’s go help your sibling,” Thomas said. The two pulled away from each other, rushing into the cafeteria.

”Remus? Remus, where are you?” Thomas called out to Remus. The two looked around the cafeteria, hearing Remus and Janus fighting but not being able to see them. Thomas peeked into the kitchen, seeing the two going back and forth.

”I HATE YOU! I HATE YOU SO MUCH! YOU RUINED MY LIFE!” Remus yelled, dodging another one of Janus’s attacks.

”ME?! I RUINED YOUR LIFE?!” Janus yelled back.

”YES!” Remus yelled.

”OH, I’M SORRY! I DIDN’T REALIZE I WAS THE ONE WHO DROVE YOU OFF THAT CLIFF!” Janus yelled.

”YOU TAKE THAT BACK!” Remus shouted.

”OR WHAT?!” Janus challenged. Remus lunged at Janus, missing it by a few inches and barreling into the wall. Janus walked over to Remus, pointing their knife down at them as Remus tried to regain their strength.

”Goodbye, Antichrist,” Janus said, raising the knife above its head.

”Wait!” Thomas shouted, rushing over between the two as Janus went to stab Remus.

The world fell silent, time seeming to freeze as Thomas stood between the two, a knife in his stomach. Janus backed up, pulling the knife out of Thomas’s stomach, its eyes looking remorseful. Tears started to form in Thomas’s eyes as he fell back, Remus catching him in their arms.

”PA!” Remus exclaimed, desperately trying to hold Thomas up. Thomas looked up at Remus, tears falling down his face.

”Remus…” Thomas said, reaching his hand up to Remus’s face. Tears fell down Remus’s face as they looked at their father.

”Pa… No, no, no, no! Pa! Don’t leave me…” Remus said, holding their father’s hand to their face.

”Remus… It’s going to be okay, buddy…” Thomas said, smiling weakly.

”No, it’s not! I still need you! I’m not strong enough without you!” Remus cried, holding their father close. Roman peeked around the corner, seeing the two and rushing over to them.

”Remus… It’s going to be okay… Trust me…” Thomas said, his breathing slowing.

”No! I can’t lose you! We still have so much to do!” Remus cried.

”Pa…” Roman said. Thomas looked over to Roman, smiling softly.

”And you, Roman… I’m sorry for failing you as a father… I should have been better…” Thomas said, reaching his hand out to Roman.

”What?! No, no, no! What are you saying?!” Roman said, tears filling his eyes, “You didn’t fail me! You could never fail me! Don’t say things like that!”

”Roman…” Thomas said. Roman started to cry, Thomas frowning.

”Come here, you two,” Thomas said, extending his arms out to the two. The two hugged Thomas, Thomas holding onto the two with all his strength.

”I love you two so much… More than life itself… I promise you two… Once we get to the afterlife together, I’ll be a better father to you,” Thomas said, smiling weakly.

”You’re already the best father we could have asked for, Pa… You found us when we were at our lowest, and you cared for us for most of our lives… That’s all we could’ve asked for considering our previous home life… We love you so much…” Remus said, tears falling down their face. Thomas looked up at the two, smiling. The three stayed in each others arms, not daring to let go as Thomas’s breathing slowed more every second.

”You know… I’m glad you two came into my life… You gave me so much more meaning than I already had… I’ll always treasure that forever…” Thomas said.

”We’re glad you were in our lives too, Pa…” Roman said, tears falling down his face.

”I love you two so much… Stay strong for me, okay…” Thomas said.

”Okay, Pa… We love yo…” Remus said, pulling away from Thomas to find Thomas laying against the wall, motionless.

”Pa?” Remus asked, their eyes widening as they checked for a heartbeat, breathing, anything to signal that their father was still with them to no avail.

”PA?! NO! NO, NO, NO, NO, NO! PA! WAKE UP! PLEASE! COME BACK!” Remus cried, holding onto Thomas. Roman backed up, putting a hand to his mouth as Remus sobbed into Thomas’s chest.

”Remus…” Janus spoke up, reaching out to Remus. Remus tossed a knife at Janus angrily, the knife flying past Janus and lodging into the wall. Remus stood up, glaring at Janus.

”Roman. Take Pa and get out of here. Now,” Remus said, summoning another knife. Roman nodded, picking Thomas up and running out of the kitchen. Janus looked at Remus, nervously.

”Remus…?” Janus said, backing up into the kitchen island behind it. Remus glared at Janus, holding their knife out towards Janus.

”I’m going to fucking kill you,” Remus said, tears streaming down their face.

Masterpost // Previous // Next

#thatonelesbianfander #sanders sides #thomas sanders #thatsthat24 #tss #sasi #sanders sides au #sanders sides fanfiction #remus sanders #roman sanders #janus sanders #logan sanders #patton sanders #virgil sanders #c!thomas sanders #c!thomas #nico flores #the ghost and the reaper au #tw major character death #tw death #tw yelling #tw shouting #tw crying #tw swearing #tw knife #tw fighting #tw screaming #tw violence

[liemonyellow]

i’m not calling you a liar - chapter 4

read on ao3

prologue | one | two | three | four | five | epilogue

Summary: Five times Janus apologized to the other sides and one time he didn’t.

Notes: Ambiguous Anxceit

Warnings: None (Please let me know if there is something I should add as warning)

[virgil] thief

As per usual when it came to Janus nowadays, Virgil was nervous.

It wasn’t always like this, though. They had gotten along better before they revealed themselves to Thomas, especially when it was important to stay unnoticed. Because unnoticed people didn’t get targeted. They didn’t get beat up for being different. They didn’t get killed for being gay.

But even beyond their shared goals, they had been friends. Best friends. Virgil had known Janus practically as well as he knew himself, and Janus had known him even better. Not a day went by that they hadn’t spent together in some form.

That was a long time ago. Virgil had long since grown wary of Janus, of the hurt he and his lies could cause, but moreover, Virgil had changed. And so had Janus, for better or worse.

He didn’t hate Janus. He couldn’t hate Janus. He understood all too well why Janus did what he did, even if he didn’t agree with it. To Janus, the ends justified the means. But Virgil could never see things that way. Things were never that straightforward for him; there were too many factors, too many perspectives, too many people and things he cared about to disregard them for his own purposes.

Virgil had for so long now wanted his best friends back. He wanted to go back to the simpler times, when he and Janus and Remus would just pile up on the bed in one of their rooms and just exist together, with nothing between them but friendship and inside jokes that were incomprehensible to the others. Now that things were different, Virgil found himself longing more and more for when they weren’t. For when he didn’t have as many regrets or worries. For a time when they were us and not them.

It wasn’t fair. He wanted Janus back. He wanted Remus back. But nothing was ever that easy, was it?

Story of his fucking life.

At least at the end of the night, he’d have some kind of answer to the question plaguing him for the last few years. Can we be friends again? Is that even possible anymore?

“Good evening, Virgil.”

He almost jumped at the sudden sound. He tried to return the greeting, but found his tongue stuck to the roof of his mouth. He just nodded instead.

Janus bowed his head in acknowledgment and moved to walk around the table to sit down. Virgil had no clue what the latter had planned for the night, but if it was anything like Patton’s, or Logan’s, or even Roman’s, Virgil didn’t think he could handle it. He was just too keyed up to enjoy being outside, especially now that it was dark. And especially not with Janus.

The prospect of spending an entire night with Janus now, when they were still in the middle of whatever the fuck their relationship had become, sounded tortuous. He should’ve just taken Janus’ offer to avoid each other to the end of time. But, as had become increasingly apparent to himself, that wasn’t what Virgil actually wanted, and it wasn’t going to be anywhere near helpful in the future now that Janus and Remus were joining them at the table.

Janus took a seat on the other side of the couch, summoning his extra arms to clear off the coffee table and place the basket he’d brought with him on top of it. Virgil hoped it wasn’t food; he was certain he wouldn’t be able to keep it down. He just watched as Janus continued doing whatever he was doing. Something about his outfit seemed vaguely familiar… but Virgil was too anxious with anticipation to really focus on that.

The other side hadn’t said anything yet, focused as he was on methodically unpacking his basket filled with… yarn?

“I thought we could have a quiet night in,” Janus said at Virgil’s bewildered stare. “Just like old times,” he added, almost whispering.

When had Janus started knitting again? Virgil ached to know. He once again wished they could just go back to those old times, when they’d just sit and craft in silence, enjoying each other’s company.

Still frustratingly mute, Virgil shrugged. He summoned and pulled out an old blanket he’d been working on patching up, along with his own supplies, and started stitching away.

There was something therapeutic about the repetitive, tedious work that Virgil enjoyed. When he got really into it, he’d fall into some trance-like flow state where he’d look up and realize it had been hours since he’d moved. Except now, he was having trouble focusing, especially with Janus right there. Just like old times. But these were anything but old times, and Virgil’s mind refused to let go of that.

Virgil tried to ignore the mounting dread that the night was going horribly. Janus hadn’t said anything more. He hadn’t apologized yet. Why wasn’t Janus speaking? He loved hearing himself talk. Some days, he would just start ranting about some stupid shit for however long he felt like ranting, and Virgil and Remus would listen, adding little comments and snarkery of their own whenever Janus paused to breathe. Now, he was just silent, utterly focused on the fabric forming in his hands and driving Virgil mad with unease.

Was it intentional? Was Janus enjoying making Virgil squirm? Or was he actually trying to ease Virgil’s anxiety with the quiet, just like old times? Once, Janus’ presence had been calming. Now, it was anything but.

Virgil couldn’t take it anymore. And now, his mouth seemed to actually work.

“Can you just apologize already so we can go back to hating each other?” It would make things easier, going back to old patterns. Safe patterns. Not the ones he may have wanted, but the ones he at least still had.

Janus froze. Then he sighed, setting down his knitting, but he didn’t look away from it.

“No.”

Virgil couldn’t believe what he was hearing. “What?!”

“You want honesty? The honest truth is that I don’t hate you. I don’t know how to apologize to you. I don’t even know what I’ve done wrong by you. I don’t know what you want from me, besides, apparently, my non-existence.” He frowned, glaring at the yarn in his lap. “And that cannot be allowed to happen.”

Then, all at once, Janus crumpled. His shoulders slumped, his head hung low, his grip on his needles loosened. “Virgil, I’m sorry. I know you hate the lying. But I can’t tell you that I’ll stop, or- or whatever other platitudes people use, because it’s what I am. Thomas needs his deceit.”

He finally looked up to meet Virgil’s eyes. “So, I guess I’m sorry that we can’t be friends anymore. That I ruined our friendship by being… me.”

The only emotion Virgil could make sense of at that moment was surprise at how easily he could still read Janus, even now. There was nothing but abject misery written into the other side’s features.

“You… you don’t hate me?”

Janus gave him a wretched smile. “You were one of my best friends. I could never hate you.”

Virgil’s heart was thundering in his chest and his ears. “N-neither could I,” he said, barely able to hear himself.

A glint of something bright flickered in Janus’ eyes. It was quickly extinguished. “You should. I’m the absolute worst.”

He wasn’t lying. One of the few times he hadn’t lied to Virgil’s face, and that was what he said? There was something so defeated in Janus’ voice, something Virgil had never heard before. It broke Virgil’s heart to hear it.

“Don’t- Look, I- I know things have been bad between us for a while, but-” Virgil grasped for the words to express his distress. “It’s not as bad, now. I don’t hate you, really. We- we still have a chance, right? To talk, or whatever? Work things out?” To be friends again?

Janus said nothing, looking back at the unfinished fabric in his lap.

“Janus, come on,” Virgil pressed. “You shouldn’t say things like that. You’re making me look like an optimist.”

Heaving another sigh, Janus picked his knitting back up. “I suppose… there is a chance things could improve. I’ve said my piece. Whatever happens from now on, happens.”

It was the best he was going to get. But Virgil wasn’t about to let this slippery snake slip through his grasp once again. He stared hard at Janus, who steadfastly ignored him.

Then it clicked why Janus’ outfit looked so familiar. Or, rather, his hoodie.

“Is… is that my old hoodie?” he asked.

Janus froze. “No.”

Hah. Caught red-handed.

Janus’ blush was quite stark against the black fabrics he’d wrapped himself in. “I was cold and you weren’t using it anyway,” he added, mumbling.

Virgil couldn’t help the fond smirk he felt forming on his lips. “Thief.”

Knowing Janus, ridiculous, infuriating, ex-best-friend Janus, his Janus, Virgil figured he’d taken to wearing it and had gotten so used to it that he didn’t even register it as out of the ordinary. It gave Virgil a bittersweet reminder of what they used to have, of Janus stealing his stuff and swaddling himself in a cocoon of Virgil’s warmth. It gave him proof, of a sort, that Janus still missed him. Most of all, it gave Virgil hope that they might get there again, someday. (And if it gave Virgil just the tiniest bit of smug pride that Janus still found comfort in his presence, no matter how small or tangential… well, he wasn’t just going to lie to Janus’ face about it.)

This wasn’t how Virgil saw this night going at all. He expected another shouting match, maybe some snark and sarcasm. Not this. He didn’t know how to deal with a Janus who seemed to have given up on something he wanted.

Luckily for the accursed snake, Virgil refused to give up on something he wanted, now that he knew it was possible. He wanted his best friend back. He would just have to try harder. For the both of them.

#my fics #ambiguous anxceit #platonic anxceit #janus sanders #virgil sanders

[spicycreativity]

The Core Four (Logan, Roman, Virgil and Patton) are somewhere spooky, old house, in the woods, etc etc, and it's a place where poltergeist/demon/ghost/devil/spirit/whatever you want Remus resides and haunts and is scary and evil in. (Or they summon him) And he's like "Ooh time to mess with them muahahahaha!" but he sees Patton and gets like this "Cute boy!" And gets interested in Patton instead.

Boop

Words: 2k

Pairing: Pre-slash Intruality

Other notes: College AU, mild Vitaminwater slander, somewhat based on my own college experience of being straight edge and bored all the time and also owning multiple fist-sized chunks of quartz crystal purchased from the tent outside the gas station down by the on-ramp on the far side of town 🥴 Our abandoned dorm building was not haunted, tho

Content warnings: Mentions of underage drinking (not depicted), mentions of overdosing (non-graphic), Remus is sexually forward toward Patton, swearing, innuendo, etc. Still, I'd only rate this T

While it was rooming assignments that brought Roman, Patton, Logan, and Virgil together during the first weeks at university, it was their mutual unwillingness to break any sort of rule that kept them together. While their peers were drinking smuggled alcohol and racking up write-ups from the RAs, the foursome would sit on Logan and Virgil's side of the dorm suite drinking Vitaminwater and attempting to entertain themselves with board games and Netflix. This, predictably, got old quickly and weekends soon became a desperate battle to stave off boredom and existential ennui.

The fraying thread of Roman's patience finally snapped the night Patton suggested Pogs. The lack of adventure had chafed at him longer than it had the others and he secretly longed for some sort of thrill, even if it meant breaking the rules.

"Ugh," Roman threw himself backwards onto the pillow he'd stolen from Logan's bed, nearly knocking over Patton's mostly-full bottle of grape Vitaminwater. "We're seriously so lame that we can't think of anything better to do than Pogs?" 

"Hey," said Virgil from atop his bed, and shook a few drops of açai-blueberry-pomegranate sugar water onto Roman's forehead.

"Sorry, Patton," Roman added, wrinkling his nose at the unpleasant sensation. "No offense, but I'm just so bored! I was expecting more adventure when I finally left my dreary old hometown."

"I thought you told us you were from Los Angeles," Logan said, tossing a package of Wet Wipes down onto Roman's chest. "And Virgil, I understand why you would want to teach Roman a lesson, but please try not to stain my pillowcase."

"What do you wanna do, Roman?" Patton asked, adjusting himself where he was propped up against one of the legs of Logan's bed.

"I don't know! All I know is that I have the most boring Snap story out of everyone in my stupid 100-level History class. Remy went surfing the other day. And he's from Nebraska! How does he know how to surf?" 

"There it is," Virgil said.

Roman sat up again and opened up the Wet Wipes so he could clean off his face. "Lightning round! Suggestions. Go!" He pointed at Virgil.

"Um," said Virgil. "Uh-- Sca-- Uh, horror marathon. Horror movie marathon."

"Ugh, no." Roman pointed at Logan.

"Studying."

"Oh, come on. Patton?"

"We all go to bed early so we can wake up and get breakfast together before the dining hall runs out of waffle batter?"

"Guuuys." Roman pointed at Virgil again.

"Man, I dunno, Roman! Like I'm the expert in what looks good on a Snapchat story."

"You're the one who's bored," Logan added. "Why don't you suggest something?"

"That's not how it works!" Roman shot back. "I'm the-- the arbiter, the czar! You're the idea guys."

"Okay, fine!" Virgil leaned over the edge of the bed to better give Roman the evil eye. "How about we break into the shut-down dorms with a ouija board and try to contact the spirit of that kid who OD'ed in the bathroom?"

"That's the spirit," Roman said.

"Ha," Patton said weakly.

"Wait," said Virgil, already desperately trying to make eye contact with Logan. "I was kidding. You can't be serious."

"No, no, that's a great idea! Virgil, go get your ouija board and whatever other spooky shit you have tucked away.

"We're going now?" Patton squeaked.

Logan sighed and swung his legs over the side of the bed. "Roman, anything you post to your Snapchat story can potentially be turned in as evidence and used to incriminate you. I suggest you leave your phone behind."

"Wait!" Virgil ran his hands through his hair, agitated. "You can't possibly be on board with this."

"I'm not," said Logan. "I am offering Roman advice for the same reason high school nurses' offices offer condoms: not as an encouragement, but as a safety measure. Either we all agree to go now or we all agree to go tomorrow night after Roman spends the whole day pouting and whining--"

"Hey!"

"So I suggest we just get it over with," Logan concluded.

"Seriously?" Patton was already pale and shaking, holding a stray hoodie of Virgil's close to his chest.

"It's okay, Patton," Virgil said, offering him a reassuring smile. "I'll let you wear my horn of protection amulet."

It took just under an hour to get everyone changed into darker clothes and outfitted with protective symbols from Virgil's collection. In addition to silver amulets and charms, he had handed out fist-sized chunks of quartz crystal to all of them with careful instructions not to lose them, as he wanted everything back at the end of the night.

But soon (all too soon for Patton) they faced the looming silhouette of the abandoned Monroe Hall. It was in surprisingly good repair despite the lack of security cameras and floodlights to deter intruders. In fact, the only light came from the blue emergency callbox situated a few yards down the path.

"We, genius," Virgil said, turning to Roman. "How do we get in?"

"I don't know!" Roman tossed up his hands. "I'd Google how to pick a lock but somebody" --he glared at Logan-- "made us leave our phones in the microwave."

"I already told you, it's a functional Faraday cage and--"

"Yeah, yeah, how about we save the science lectures for 8:00 am on Tuesdays and Thursday," Roman said.

"That was oddly specific," Virgil muttered, trying and failing to exchange a glance with Patton, who was staring at the ground and turning over the quartz crystal in his hands. "Wait, I've got an idea." He took his own chunk of quartz out of his pocket and slammed it through the glass door, sending a shower of tempered glass clattering onto the tiled floor inside. Then he stepped through the hole and beckoned the others in after him. "Let's go."

Patton made a muffled sound of fear and grabbed onto Logan's arm.  "You don't really think there's a ghost, do you?"

"Of course not," Logan said, leading Patton inside and following Virgil to the stairs.

"Wait!" Roman jogged ahead to lead the charge. "Are we not gonna talk about Virgil just--"

"Found a broken door and stepped through it?" Virgil interrupted, bumping Roman with his hip. "No, we are not."

Roman led them up a flight of stairs and down a corridor similar to the one in their own dorm building. All the doors they tried were locked, so they set up the ouija board in the hallway outside the bathrooms.

"Okay, gang," Virgil said once they were all sequestered around the board. "Pointer fingers on the planchette."

"Not our whole hands?" Roman asked.

Virgil shot him a sideways glare. "I'm sorry, are you the expert on the occult?"

"Are you?" Roman asked.

"Relative expert," Virgil said, sticking out his tongue. "Now. Pointer fingers on the planchette."

"I really don't know if this is a good idea," Patton said, extending a shaking hand.

"You should be more afraid of campus security," Logan said. "Although from the state of the building, it appears that we are the first to successfully enter."

"Nothing's happening," Roman complained, his eyes on the planchette.

"We haven't asked a question yet, genius," Virgil sneered.

"It seems rude to barge into someone's house and just start asking questions," Patton said. He looked up, addressing the ghost. "Hi!"

The planchette jerked and began to shake. Anticipating Virgil's accusation, Roman held up his other hand. "It's not me!"

"Shut up!" Virgil snapped. "It's moving."

They read the letters out loud together as the planchette began to move around the board: "N-I-C-E." Pause. "C-O-C-K."

"Oh, come on." Virgil grabbed the planchette and threw it at Roman's face. "Not funny."

"I swear that wasn't me!" Roman said, smacking the planchette down. It clattered across the board and came to a stop by the number '2.'

"Roman," Patton chided, "it's really not nice to mess with us like that."

"You too?' Roman said. He turned to Logan. "Come on, Specs, you know it wasn't me."

"I know it wasn't a ghost. I know it wasn't me. I know Patton and Virgil aren't likely to make that sort of joke. Therefore, I can safely posit that it must have been you. Although I wouldn't make an accusation without more evidence."

"Oh, come on!" Roman put his hand on the planchette despite Virgil's noise of protest. "Hey, spirit. Can you do something else spooky so my friends stop accusing me of--"

What happened next was equal parts anticlimactic and chilling: Roman's eyes turned green and began to emit a gentle glow. He was silent for only a moment before turning to Patton with a chipper smile. "Hey, hot stuff! Nice cock."

"Whoa" said Virgil, scrambling backwards toward the wall. "What the fuck."

"He invited me in!" said Roman, or more accurately, the ghost possessing Roman's body.

"Oh my God," Patton said. "That's not Roman."

"Yeah, no shit!"

"I'll give him back in a minute," said the spirit. "I just had to shoot my shot with hottie over here. What's your name, sugar?"

"Uh," said Patton, glancing wildly at Virgil (who was fumbling in his pocket for his holy water or his salt, whatever he found first) and Logan (who was actively blue-screening). "Patton?"

"Nice to meet you, Patton." The ghost stuck Roman's hand out for a shake. "Name's Remus. Has anyone ever told you you're kinda DILF-y for a college student?"

"N-no?"

"Well, you are."

"Thanks, I guess." Patton sat back and pulled his legs up to his chest in an unmistakably defensive pose. "Um, is there something that you wanted, Remus?"

"I already told you!" Roman's face beamed in a way it never had before, his eyes twitching strangely in their sockets. "I just popped in to shoot my shot. So?"

"He's propositioning you," Logan hissed. 

"I…" said Patton, panic whiting out his mind. Unable to find words, he held up his left hand to show off the silver band on his ring finger.

"You're married?" Roman's body leaned forward to read the engraved writing. "True love waits."

"It's a purity ring," Virgil explained, finally extricating a small vial from the tangle of cords and chains in his pocket. "And this is holy water."

"Wait," said Remus, "are you guys exorcising me? Cause I swear I'm gonna give you your friend back. I'm dead, not evil. Also," he turned to Patton, "is that a no?"

"Yes!"

"Wait, so you do wanna bang?"

"No!"

"Alright, alright, damn." Remus leaned Roman's body back, putting up his hands in a defensive gesture. "You know, I was gonna go full poltergeist and try to see if I could make you all cry, but I changed my mind when I saw Hot Pat-tato. Soooo, you're welcome."

"Yeah," said Virgil, "I'm not sure we should be thanking you for taking over our friend's body. Give him back, by the way."

"Wait!" said Patton. "Remus, why aren't you at rest? Is there something we can do to help you move on?"

"Nah," said Remus. "To be honest, I just wanted to haunt the crap out of some dumb college kids."

"Need I point out," Logan said, "that you are also a dumb college kid?"

Virgil looked around at the empty halls, walls of closed doors, the dusty spiderwebs hanging like streamers in the corners. "Wait. There's nobody to haunt."

"Yeah," said Remus. Roman's shoulders shrugged. "It's been kinda lonely and boring. 

"Sucks to suck," Virgil said, brandishing the sealed vial of holy water. "Okay, time to go."

Remus sighed and crossed Roman's arms over his chest. "Fine. I didn't really want to haunt you guys anyway."

"I might…" Patton twisted up his mouth thoughtfully, rubbing his fingers along the quartz crystal in his pocket. "Maybe I'll come back and say hello sometime."

The grin that unfurled across Roman's face was so familiar that Patton nearly hugged him. But his eyes were still that slightly luminescent green, still twitching and rolling like he was trying to take in every detail of the world all at once. "Really?"

Patton nodded and held out his hand palm-up. Roman's hand was icy, but Patton forced himself not to flinch as he brought his head down and kissed Remus' knuckles. "Really."

For a moment, there was silence. Then came a gentle warmth, and confused brown eyes staring down at Patton, who only had time to gasp before Roman tilted his head in confusion. "Um, Patton? Why are you holding my hand?"

#you are contractually obligated to point out any formatting errors or typos #sanders sides #sanders sides fanfiction #intruality #college au #spicywrites #patton sanders #remus sanders #anyway i am forever entertained by the idea of ONLY projecting my idiosyncrasies onto the characters and none of my psychological trauma #hence the overshare about college #you can know every exact details of what i did from ages 18-21 but i will never ever tell you how my parents fucked me up #no bummers! funny shit only!

[random-writes-blog]

Knowing right from wrong

Summery: Remus isn’t always the best 12 year old. He acts and speaks on impulse and during a fight he bites Roman. Patton won’t let let that happen again.

Unsympathetic Patton, Questionable Logan, Sympathetic Remus, Sympathetic Roman, kid!sides, gore, claustrophobia, whump, collar, spikes, child abuse (seriously a Lot of the language is from experience so be careful.), manipulation, Hurt no comfort, please ask to tag

Patton paced the living room, “I still can’t believe he did that-” his hands were still shaking from anxiety and adrenaline. He turned to Logan, “We have to do something about him.“

Logan nodded, “We’ll let him settle down and have a nice talk-“

”He bit Roman!” Patton said, ”And those horrible things he talks about all the time-” he shuddered than sighed, “Listen Logan, I love Remus as much as I love every other side. But we can’t do nothing about his behavior.”

Logan raised an eyebrow, “I didn’t say we should do nothing. I said we should talk to him about the situation.”

Patton shook his head, “It won’t work, we can talk and talk but he won’t listen.“ He moved to sit next to Logan on the couch, “I know you think we can work with him, that he must have something good to offer or else he wouldn’t be a part of Thomas but... I think he might just be rotten. And if we let the rot fester inside Thomas...”

”I heavily disagree with your view of the situation. This isn’t a pattern of behavior, Remus got mad at Roman and bit him once. You can’t look at one mistake and some of his more... Disturbing moments and decide that he’s bad.”

There was a loud howling wail from across the hall as if Remus wanted to throw his own opinion on his existence onto the table. Though it was just as likely that he was pissed at being grounded for the moment. They decided to ignore it.

”We need to look at the risk vs rewards aspect of this Logan. Let’s say Remus never hurts anyone again after your talk. He‘ll still say those... Awful things and won’t contribute anything meaningful to Thomas’s life. And if I’m right and your conversation does nothing?” Patton bit his lip, “Logan we don’t know who he’s going to hurt next.”

Logan sighed, there was really no arguing with Patton sometimes, and he did have a point... ”What do you suggest we do then?”

Patton took Logan’s hands in his, “Give me a week to work things out with him. I think I know how to fix him.”

Logan took a deep breath, “Okay.“

————-——————————————

Remus banged on the door of the closet, every second it felt like the walls were growing closer together. He could feel it boxing him in, trapping him there. He was losing air. If he stayed in much longer the walls would squish around him and his bones would snap underneath him and he’d run out of air and he couldn’t breathe- he couldn’t breathe so he shouted and screamed.

“Let me out! I’ll tear out your throat with my teeth! I’ll tear off your skin until you’re just muscles and bones and blood on my fingers! I’ll-“

The door to the closet finally opened the slight light of the hallway streaming through. His eyes lit up and he tried to run out; only to be picked up. He kicked and thrashed against the person holding him, the person chuckled and he stopped, looking up curiously.

“Are you done?” Patton asked, “I want you to let it all out now, because I’m not going to let you keep hurting people kiddo.”

Remus gave a small nod, not because he was ‘done’ fighting back. He was just kind of stuck at the moment.

Patton smiled, “You’re doing better already. Alright, I’m going to put something on your neck quickly, than put you down okay?”

Remus squinted, but apparently his actual consent wasn’t required for Patton to reach around his neck and put on a loose green collar. Then Patton dropped him on the ground.

He immediately summoned his tentacles to try to unclasp it. The minute a sucker touched the material though, he felt the sudden sharp jolt of a metal spike piercing through the soft flesh of his tentacle. He tried to pull it off but only felt the spike move, tearing further down his tentacle. He could feel his own blood start to travel down his neck.

”Get-Get it off!” He shouted at Patton, he tugged more, only tearing further into himself and let out a small cry.

Patton held onto his tentacle, “Don’t move. You’ll only hurt yourself more.”

“YOU LITTLE BITCH, I’ll kill you! Get this thing off me, get it off! I’ll kill you I’ll-“ He felt another spike form on the collar near his throat. He held his breath. One wrong move and it’d would cut into him.

Patton hummed, “All of that was extremely impolite. Death threats? Remus is that any way to treat anyone?“ His face softened as he knelt down and took Remus’s head in his hand, “I don’t want to hurt you. Not really. I just want you to know that you can’t behave the way you do and not face any consequences.”

Remus was very aware of how close the spike was to his throat, how close it was to cutting off his larynx or his airway or-

“Now, if you just say you’re sorry, I’ll call off the spikes and we can talk about how this will work for us, okay?”

Go to hell! He wished he could shout it and spit in Patton’s face, but the metal near his throat and on his tentacle were a good enough deterrent.

Patton tapped his foot, “I don’t have all day. Apologize. Now. I’m going to count down from 3 to 1.”

”3.”

No! Fuck that and fuck him! He wasn’t going to cave to threats

”2.”

He was Morality. He wouldn’t really do that to him, even if he was shitty. (Would he?)

”1” He heard a disappointed tut. Than a burst of pain as the spike dug itself into his throat. He fell to the ground, he wanted to cry out but the only noise he could make was a strangled gurgle. Black spots danced around his vision and he stared at the blood, a lake with smaller rivers of crimson slowly moving away. It was the kind of thing that would have made him smile if he wasn’t in agony. He decided that’s what he would decide to focus on instead of Patton’s drones or the numbness that was slowly making its way through his body.

He didn’t know how long he paid attention to that before feeling a swift kick to his stomach That made him curl in on himself. He wanted to vomit.

Patton’s voice hasn’t changed from the stern, caring tone he’d had since the beginning. “Remus, how are you supposed to learn anything when you won’t pay attention? Look at me.”

Remus managed to move his body to look at him. He watched as the spikes moved out of his neck and tentacle, which fell limp to the floor. With a snap, Remus’s body began to repair itself, but the pain remained.

”Good.” Patton said, his smile mocked him. “I still want that apology and you owe Roman one too for how you behaved earlier.

Remus stared at him in disbelief. He was still thinking about that apology? That felt like decades ago... “’m sorry.” He mumbled. He really wasn’t in fact he wished his threats would actually come true and he could kill Patton.

Patton put his hand to his ear, “What was that? I couldn’t understand you.”

He had to be fucking with Remus. He wasn’t going to repeat himself, Patton got his apology! What more did he want?!

”I could make it worse you know. All of our damage is temporary so it’s not like anyone would know-“

“I’m sorry, okay?” He practically shouted, he hated this, but he didn’t want to make it worse.

Patron sighed and pat his head, “It’s a start kiddo. I hope you know now that violent and hurtful behavior will not be tolerated.” He kissed Remus’s forehead, “I love you, and I want you to start doing better for me. Okay?”

It wasn’t a question. It was a threat. One that they both knew he wouldn’t hesitate to act on. Morality meant knowing the difference between right and wrong and acting on it. Remus was wrong and there was no hesitation to Patton’s actions.

”Okay.“ Remus took a breath, “Can I take this thing off now?”

Patton shook his head, “No, I want you to keep it on, to remind you of what you learned today. Now, let’s take you to your room.”

Remus nodded and followed him, his head was starting to fuzz over. He felt like he was in a daze. The next thing he remembered was being tucked into bed.

“Hey Ro-boat?”

“Yeah?”

“I’m sorry for biting you earlier.”

“‘s okay, it didn’t even hurt that much! And Logan gave me this super cool dragon bandaid! Hang on let me get the light so I can show it to you.”

He heard Roman fiddling around, trying to get the switch and shook his head. “Show me in the morning. I just want to sleep right now.”

Roman swung his body so he was peering down at him from the top bunk, “You never want to sleep at night, what’s wrong?”

“I don’t feel too great.”

“Should I get Logan?”

”No-“

”Should I get Patton?”

Remus’s eyes shot open, “No!“ He took a deep breath, “Just... Just go to bed. I’ll be better in the morning I promise.“

“Okay...“ He pulled himself back into his bed, “Good night, Duke of Scarington.“

”Good night.”

#Unsympathetic Patton #Questionable Logan #Sympathetic Remus #Sympathetic Roman #Whump #tw child abuse #Tw claustrophobia #tw gore #tw manipulation #Rem Writes

[agerestorybits]

Hiding.

Roman didn’t mean to drop. He just...he was losing the argument and he was so upset and he just..couldn’t hold on anymore. He sunk out in the middle of Logan’s lecture. He went to the only person he trusted when he was little.

Remus.

He hid under Remus’s bed and Remus joined him. “What’s wrong?”

“Everyone’s mad an I messed up again!” Roman said, wiping tears from his eyes. Remus put an arm around Roman and pulled him to his side.

“Hey. It’s ok.” Remus said, “You are doing your best. That’s not messing up.”

“Logn tinks so.” Roman said dropping more.

Remus sighed. He wasn’t going to argue with Roman right now. He needed to distract him. “Hey, Let’s play a game!”

“A game?”

“How about go fish?” Remus asked.

“Ok!”

---

Patton was looking for Roman after he ran off. He wanted to make sure he was ok. Logan was harsher than necessary today and while he still believed he was in the right, was willing to apologize to Roman.

The only problem was that no one had seen Roman for hours. The only person he hadn’t asked was Remus.

He was about to knock when he heard Roman yell, “I win again!”

“Are you sure you’re not cheating?” Remus asked in a surprisingly kind voice.

“No!” Roman said.

“You’re not sure if you're cheating?” Remus fake gasped.

Roman giggled, “No! I mean I not Sheeting!”

“Oooooo!” Remus replied.

Patton was confused, he knocked on the door. The laughter on the other side of the door cut off. He heard a whimper. There was a solid minute before the door opened.

“Hi Remus. I’m looking for Roman.” Patton said peeking into the room and not seeing any sign of Roman, there were cards on the floor though.

“Why do you care where he is?” Remus said he sounded defensive.

“Logan wants to apologize for his behavior.” Patton said louder so that Roman could hear him and stop hiding!

“That’s nice. I’m sure it’ll make up for everything.” Remus said flatly.

“Remus..”

“Listen. Why don’t you go tell Logan to shove his apologies up his ass!” Remus said. “We’re tired of words. We need actions! Changes!”

“What do you mean?” Patton asked.

Remus scoffed. “I don’t have time to enlighten you.” He closed his door and locked it.

Patton tried the door knob and sighed when he found it locked. “Just...tell Roman we’re waiting for him.”

Roman was under the bed again listening. He crawled out when Remus told him that Patton was gone.

“You don’t have to go back. You can stay here with me.” Remus offered.

Roman felt guilty for running off, “He wants to say sorry?”

“He’s said sorry before and then did it again. They all have.” Remus reminded him.

“This time?” Roman asked hopefully.

Remus’ heart break a little at the hope in Roman’s face at the thought that they were going to be nicer to him when he tried so hard to be better himself. Remus couldn’t bring himself to crush that hope. “...Maybe…”

Roman looked at the door. His face shifting, that small shift from little to big. “I should go back.”

Remus nodded. There was no use arguing.

Besides Roman would be back in a couple hours anyway. His heart torn out again as the cycle continued.

---

“What do you think?” Roman asked excitedly.

Logan stared at him. “It’s….adequate.”

Roman smiled. It was the first idea in a week that Logan seemed to approve of. He was flying high...until Logan continued speaking.

“Of course it still needs work. But as a first draft it’s fine.”

Roman’s heart sunk. This wasn’t the first draft. This was the finished product! This was…

This was fine. “I’m glad to hear that.” Roman said, forcing his voice to not waver.

Logan nodded. “I need we’re done for today.”

Roman watched him walk away and let his smile drop. He sighed and closed his eyes. He rubbed his face and tried to pull himself together. “You ok?”

He looked up to see Virgil watching him. “Fine.”

“You don’t look fine.” Virgil said.

“It’s fine. I swear.” Roman said. And it was, wasn't it? This was normal. If anything it was better than normal. What reason did he have to be upset about it?

Virgil looked him over, “You need a break.”

“I still have to...finish this.” The last two words come out broken. He didn’t have to finish it, he had to re do it. Fix it.

Virgil took the notepad from him. He scanned through it. “...It’s….nice.”

The hesitation in Virgil’s voice broke Roman. He slipped into Little space. He teared up. Virgil stared shocked. “Whoa! Whoa! Ah..shit! Don’t cry!”

Roman hid his face in his hands as he cried. Virgil cursed again. “Patton!” He called.

Patton stuck his head in. “What do you…” He saw Roman. “What happened?”

“I mess up agin.” Roman wailed. Virgil and Patton stared in shock at the shift in tone and words.

“I think we broke him.” Virgil said panicked.

“What do we do?” Patton asked.

“Don’t look at me!”

Roman whimpered from the yelling and ran off. “Ro don’t leave!”

He ran into Logan and knocked them both down. “Roman if you could watch where you-” He was cut off as he took in the terror in Roman’s face. Roman scrambled to his feet and kept running. Logan was stunned and it took Virgil offering him a hand for him to snap out of it and get to his feet.

“What happened?” Logan asked.

“I don’t know.” Virgil said.

“Well we need to follow him. Find out what’s wrong.” Patton said.

---

Remus looked up as the door opened and he was instantly concerned as he saw Roman who slammed the door shut before sitting down on the floor in front of it.

“Roman what happened?” Remus asked kneeling down next to him. Roman hugged him and sobbed.

“I did it. But Logn said not good enuf. Den V didn’t like it edter.” Roman explained.

At this point the others had gotten to Remus’ door and could hear Roman and Remus through it.

“Hey. it’s ok.” Remus said trying to calm him.

“No! I kep mess up! Always!” Roman yelled before breaking down into more sobs.

The three outside looked at each other guilty. “What’s going on with him?” Virgil whispered, “Why’s he talking like that?”

“A mental breakdown?” Logan suggested.

“Because of us?” Patton asked wide eyed.

“WE can hear you!” Remus called. They heard Roman whimper.

“Roman we’re sorry.” Patton said.

“EAT A DICK!” Remus snapped back. He opened the door, “You always say sorry but you never change! Never actually listen to him! I’d think you would be more careful about that.” He pointed to Logan who shifted awkwardly.

They peeked in the room and Roman wasn’t in sight.

“What’s going on with him?” Virgil asked.

“He’s coping.” Remus snapped. “Because you all make him NEED to.”

“Why didn’t he say anything?” Virgil shot back.

Remus glared at him. “He has! Multiple times! None of you cared enough to really listen!”

“Re stop.” Roman’s voice came from under the bed.

“No I’m not going to-”

“Scary me.” Roman said quieter. Remus’ anger faded. He sighed.

“Sorry. I didn’t mean to upset you.” Remus said going over and dropping to the floor to look under the bed at Roman. The others inched their way into the room.

Roman peeked out at them. He looked scared of them. That sure made them uncomfortable.

“Roman we really are sorry.”

“I didn’t mean to upset you.” Virgil said.

Roman looked down at the floor, “It’s ok. I did bad.”

Logan frowned, “You didn’t. If anything you have been doing some of your best work lately.”

Roman stared at him mouth open, “weally?”

“Why is he talking like that?”

“Fuck off!” Remus snapped.

“Re….” Roman put a hand on Remus’ shoulder.

Remus huffed, “He age regresses.”

“How young are you right now?” Logan asked.

Roman hesitated before holding up three fingers.

“Oh.”

“Oh is right! Now you can all talk to him later! Right now get out!” Remus said.

Patton stared to protest and Remus summoned a weapon (of which I totally thought of). They left.

Roman crawled out from under the bed.

“Are you ok with them knowing?” Remus asked concerned.

Roman curled up in Remus’ lap. “I guess.” He shrugged.

“I could hit them hard enough that they don’t remember it.” Remus offered.

Roman giggled, “No!”

“Oh come on! Just a little thump upside the head?” Remus asked.

“Re!” Roman laughed, “Dat’s bad!”

Remus stuck his tongue out. “Try and stop me tot!”

Roman stuck his tongue out too. He looked at the door and frowned. “What if they mean about it?”

Remus sighed and hugged him, “Then I’ll give them hell about it.”

Roman hummed, “Mkay.”

----

Roman saw them all at breakfast the next day. They all froze and looked at him when he walked in. He took a breath, “Any chance we just..forget yesterday happened?” He asked meekly.

Patton tackled hugged him. “I’m so sorry!”

“We didn’t know we were pushing you so much.” Logan said.

“It’s...fine! Really! I just have to learn how to handle it!” Roman said.

Virgil slammed his hands on the table, “No you don’t! You shouldn’t have to find a way to Cope with us like that!”

“Sorry.” Roman said on instinct.

Patton pulled back, “We are going to change.”

“Really?” Roman asked hopefully.

“We want you to be happy.” Logan said.

Roman smiled. Then paused. “I don’t suppose you would be willing to….nevermind.”

“What do you need?” Patton asked determined.

Roman didn’t look at any of them, “Umm...watch me when I’m..little?”

“Won’t we cause you to be little?” Virgil asked.

“Well.. I don’t regress because of you all every time…. Sometimes it’s just normal stress.” Roman said. He watched them all look at each other…. This was a bad idea. “Just forget I said anything! It was a stupid idea!”

“Roman.” He looked up at Logan. “We would be honored.”

Roman smiled.

Remus listened from around the corner and he took a breath for the first time since Roman walked in there. He was sure he would have to go in there and bust some heads. He might still have to if they didn’t take care of Roman right. But for now he was willing to give them the benefit of the doubt.

Maybe things would get better.

Remus was happy for Roman. Really! He found his place! He even started going to one of the others instead of him…..which was fine of course! He wasn’t upset...or hurt...or betrayed.

He sat on his bed. Six months had passed since Roman had come by to see him. He still saw him around it but it was different now...Roman didn’t need Remus to protect him. He wasn’t his safe haven anymore. And...Remus missed that.

It wasn’t like he never hung out with Roman but...Roman wasn’t regressed then. It was different. More strained.

“Are you ok?” Roman asked.

“I...no.” Remus said.

“What’s wrong?”

Remus paused, “Just...creative block.” He lied. “It’ll pass.”

Roman nodded sympathetically. “Let me know if you need anything ok?”

I need you to need me. Remus thought. But he didn’t say it. He couldn’t say it. Roman was happy now. He spent so long wanting this, Remus was not going to mess it up!

---

He came downstairs to find an obviously little Roman playing with Patton on the floor.

‘Great job!” Patton praised Roman who giggled.

Remus closed his eyes for a moment and opened them to see Patton looking up at him concerned. He noticed the wetness on his cheeks and was quick to wipe the tears away.

“Remus are you ok?” Roman looked up at his brother’s name.

His face lit up, “Re!”

Remus turned and went back upstairs.

He almost got to his door when someone tackled him from behind. “No! You gotta play too!”

“You...want me to play with you?” Remus asked.

Roman looked at him, a bit more aware than he normally was when he was little. “Of course.” Remus beamed and picked Roman up. “RE!”

“Away we go!”

---

“We need to talk.” Roman said.

Remus looked up at him from where he was laying on the floor. “Yeah?” Roman didn’t really seek him out anymore so he was intrigued.

Roman said down on the floor cross legged and sighed. “I’m sorry.”

“What?”

“I haven’t been spending as much time with you as I should and Didn’t see how that was affecting you. So..I’m sorry.” Roman said.

Remus laughed. “Wha-wha-what? Are you kid-kidding me? You don’t have to worry about me! I’m fine!”

“No you aren’t.” Roman said.

“Really I’m…” The look Roman gave him cut him off. “Fine you caught me. I miss taking care of you. Happy now?”

“Re why didn’t you tell me?” Roman asked.

Remus shrugged. “I didn’t want you to feel like you owe me something.”

“Owe you...Remus!” Roman smacked Remus’s arm. “Are you serious right now? That’s not how this works!”

“I know!”

“Then why didn’t you tell me?”

“BECAUSE YOU DON’T NEED ME!” Remus yelled. He took a breath. “You don’t need me around anymore. It would be selfish of me to ask for you to let me take care of you if you didn’t want that.”

Now it was Roman’s turn to laugh. “Of course I still want you to take care of me! I thought you wanted a break from my constant problems.”

“Why would I want a break from that? It’s the most interesting part of my day!”

“Really?” Roman asked.

“Really.” Remus said.

Roman hugged him. “Ok.”

“So…”

“Yes. I still want you to take care of me.” Roman said. “I really do.”

Remus hugged him back.

#agere roman #little roman #cg remus #patton #logan #virgil #mild cursing #mild angst

[remus-sanders-is-the-bestest]

Thomas has a lot to explain

Alternative title: what to do when your friends use a shrink ray on you but they’re imaginary and your other friends are on the way

Just a bit of context, I headcannon that Remus is incredibly smart, and will do stupid things with Logan, in the name of science.

Word count: 1572

Remus and Logan were thinking of scenarios that they could make happen with their shrink ray.

"What if we used it on Thomas? He's the only one who hasn't shrunk before, and I don't know whether it would work on a being that is not imaginary. We should try it. Forscienceofcourse" Logan finished hurriedly.

"Huh, never thought of that. I doubt that he'd agree to it though so..... surprise attack? We need to collect the data and we can't do that if we ask and he disagrees. We could do it right now to stop risk of being stopped by someone"

"That would work, however Joan and Talyn are on their way to Thomas's apartment soon, and if it works it would be incredibly inconvenient for Thomas to explain"

"Come on nerdy wolverine. The shrink ray works both ways, we can just turn him straight back. No need for worrying. Don't you want to have an experiment that involves Thomas?"

Logan sighed. He really did want to have an experiment that involved his host, and this was an easy way to do it without being stopped.

"Fine"

They picked up the shrink ray and sunk into Thomas's living room.

"Guys, what are you doing here? Is something wrong?"

"Science" Logan whispered, firing up the shrink ray.

"What's that? GUYS WHATS THA—" A bright flash of light cut him off, temporarily blinding him.

When he opened his eyes, it was to a vastly different point of view than before he was forced to close them. He turned to where Logan and Remus were stood together.

"What the fuck guys. What did you do? Joan and Talyn are about to be here, and you do this? Was this remus's idea?" It was then that he noticed Logan staring at something he was holding. The logical side looked up momentarily, face panicky

"It would appear that since we, and the shrink ray, originate from inside your mind, we have also shrunk. This would be fine if I hadn't of dropped the shrink ray when I felt my own size decrease. It seems to of suffered a greater fall than it would have if it stayed big. It is too damaged to change you back yet."

Thomas was growing nervous "can't you, like, summon another one?"

Remus, who had been uncharacteristically silent, spoke up. "There are limits to what we are able to do, Thomas. We had to make it from scratch. We could summon the materials, sure, but putting them together took days, almost weeks. We can try to fix it but it will take hours at least. I'm sorry" the thing that surprised Thomas the most was that Remus sounded genuine in his apology.

Before he could respond, Virgil showed up, sensing Thomas's rising anxiety levels. When he noticed the problem he stormed over to Remus and Logan. "Oh. My. Fucking. God. You two. I swear Logan, how can we class you as the smart one when you pull shit like this?! And don't try to blame it all on Remus, I'm sure that he had at least some part in it, but I know full well that you wanted to know if it would work on Thomas. Now you've gone and put Thomas in danger. He's not imaginary, he can die. In comparison to him at the moment, Joan and Talyn would be giants. What would have happened if the ray had a bad effect on Thomas and killed him? This is why you need to ask people before you do a dangerous experiment. Now Thomas is stuck like this until you can get it fixed and to top it all off, Joan and Talyn will be here any second."

As if on cue, the door opened. Thomas couldn't help but feel a deep instinctual fear of his friends. He knew that they wouldn't hurt him, but when you're faced with giants, you're gonna be scared aren't you? It didn't help that Virgil was muttering all the things that could go wrong. He ran under the couch.

He could just hide there until Logan fixed the thing. Unfortunately it seemed like Talyn noticed the movement out of the corner of their eye.

"I think something just went under the couch" fear coursed through his body, Virgil generating endless possibilities of what could happen, despite the fact that these seemingly giants were his friends and would never hurt him. Logan was trying to calm Virgil down, saying about how logically there was nothing to worry about, these were Thomas's friends and they would never purposely hurt him. Both Remus and Virgil pointed out that accidents happen all the time, and it wouldn't take much more than one wrong step for Thomas to die.

This (of course) did not help the mood. Nor did it help Thomas's racing heart when Talyn looked under the couch. He felt like his heart was going to explode it was beating that fast by the time that their eyes locked on his 3 inch form.

"What the..." they muttered, reaching out to grab him.

He ran. He ran as fast as his infinitesimally sized legs could carry him. It wasn't quick enough. Nowhere near in fact. He was soon being scooped up into hands that could crush him if they squeezed too tight. But he wasn't being squeezed at all, the hands just cupped around him. It was like being on a living cushion, and that thought unsettled him. Probably Remus's doing he noted, desperately trying to distract himself from the frankly terrifying situation at hand.

"Thomas?! What the- how?!"

He waved, weakly. "H-hi"

"What the fuck happened?"

"It's a long story, and honestly not that believable."

"Just tell me"

"Fine. Get Joan over here, I'm not explaining this twice, and you might leave out details"

The now colossal friend called over to their partner.

"JOAN! I FOUND THOMAS!"

He rubbed his ears, that was really fucking loud.

The mentioned human walked over. It seemed they didn't notice the shrunken man yet.

"Where is he?"

Talyn nodded towards their hands, where Thomas was sat. He waved again.

"How the fuck—"

"Thomas was just about to explain that if you'll let him"

"Well, I won't be explaining but the person explaining will be in my body, if that makes sense."

"It does not but go on"

"Before it happens, please don't be alarmed if he says things. There are a lot of things that he likes to say, but unfortunately he's the only one that knows exactly what happened that isn't fixing the shrink ray"

"Woah, woah, woah. Shrink ray?! How the fuck"

"If you'll let me give the guy my body, you'll find out" his eyes rolled back in his head, returning a blood red.

"Woah, having a body that can't be turned into slime or shapeshift is weird. Anyway so, me and my friends represent different aspects of Thomas's personality. Me being 'bad' creativity or intrusive thoughts. You may call me Remus or the duke, my brother Roman is 'good' creativity and the ego, my boyfriend Logan is logic, then there's Patton, he's morality, the heart, the feelings, the inner dad and the inner child. And last but not least, there's Janus and Virgil. Janus is the embodiment of deceit and all of the lies that Thomas tells and Virgil is the embodiment of anxiety. Me and Logan were messing with our shrink ray and we wanted to know whether it would work on Thomas because he was the only one that knew about us that wasn't imaginary. Oh yeah I forgot to mention the fact that we're all imaginary. So anyway we kinda surprise attacked him, which shrunk us as well because we're a part of him. It also shrunk the shrink ray which Logan dropped in surprise, causing it to break. And then you showed up after Virgil yelled at us a bit. Logan is off fixing the ray now.

"You know, the others have all had a turn possessing him but this is my first, because I 'would kill someone' and 'would get him arrested'. I mean I would, but it would be so cool. I think the thing he was most worried about was me hurting either of you. I do have a lot of plans for that, but I can't act them out when Thomas is this small, which is probably why he let me possess him instead of waiting for Logan to come back"

Joan and Talyn seemed to be processing the very startling news that Remus told them. After about a minute of silence, Remus announced that the shocked looks on their faces was indeed hilarious but he had to go.

When his eyes rolled back into his head, this time they returned to their normal chocolatey brown. "I'm really sorry that you had to meet him, but I guess we all know what happened now" Thomas apologised.

"Dude. I know I've already said this, and it's been explained but WHAT THE FUCK?!??"

(It was at that moment that Percy Jackson broke through the window, screaming "DID SOMEONE JUST SAY THE THREE WORDS THAT DESCRIBE MY LIFE?!" He then caught sight of Thomas and said "what the fuck". just kidding, that would almost be as unrealistic as 3 mil people watching someone talking to himself for 30-50 minutes. Oh wait)

And I guess that's the end? Probably.

#remus sanders #sanders sides au #sanders sides g/t #logan sanders #thomas sanders #character thomas #character joan #character talyn #virgil sanders #sanders sides fic

[im-actually-ok]

Fangs

Chapter Five

First, Previous, Next

Masterlist

Fandom: Sanders Sides

Ships: Platonic DLAMPR, platonic Logince, platonic Moceit

Word Count: 1077

Genre: Not fluff but not angst, idk

Warnings: Fangs, very slight body horror(the fangs), food, eating, spying, alcohol(Janus being a wine mom), doing the wrong thing for the right reason (i think that’s it but if i missed anything please let me know so i can add it, thank you!!!)

----

Ohhhhhhh gosh why was Logan doing this?? Roman was going to think he was weird and a screw up and- and-

“Jesus, Logan, what happened to you??” Logan was snapped from his anxious thoughts when he heard Roman, looking up to see Roman looking at him with a look of… confusion? Concern?? Logan wasn’t the best with emotions.

He made sure the door was closed before he moved and just… sat down on the floor, “hey, Ro,” he said softly, moving a hand up to cover his mouth as he spoke.

Roman was definitely concerned but he moved, sitting on the floor as well. Logan… /definitely/ looked off. First off all his hair was longer, most of it was tied back into a short ponytail but a bit hung over his eyes in the front, the second was the dark circles under his eyes. Guess the lisp wasn’t the only different thing about Logan, also the fact he wasn’t wearing his usual black polo and blue tie. Instead he had on a dark blue large sleep shirt that hung over his small frame and pajama pants with little spaceships and planets and stars.

“Hey, Lo,” he said softly, “you ok?”

“Not… not really,” he said softly.

“You… you wanna talk about it?”

Logan hesitated. Did he really want to tell Roman???

Yeah. He wanted to do this.

“Don’t… just don’t freak out, ok?”

Roman nodded slightly but truly he couldn’t make any promises.

Logan took a breath and nodded as well, “Right. No point in pothtponing it.” he looked down at his lap, “I wath… experimenting and it… didn’t go the way I planned..” he said softly and Roman raised an eyebrow.

“What do you mean?” He asked, the concern and confusion on his face growing.

“I mean that I-...” he sighed, putting his hand down and facing Roman so the other would see his teeth, “I fucked up,”

------

“Patton, it’s eleven pm, why are you here?” Janus asked, leaning against the doorframe in his black robe with hints of yellow and a green face mask on, his hair pulled up out of his face and a wine glass in his hand.

“I need your help,” Patton said, hugging himself around the torso.

Janus sighed, “What did you do?”

“I-wha- nothing!”

“Then what do you need me for?” He asked with an eyebrow raise.

Patton sighed and looked around, unsure if anyone was listening, “Can I come inside?”

Janus rolled his eyes, “Ah yes, at eleven pm in my self care hours, I’d /love/ for you to come in,” he said, obviously not wanting him to come in.

“Thanks, Janus,” He said, stepping inside and not catching the sarcasm.

Janus just sighed, walking back inside after Patton and closing his door. Patton pulled out a chair from Janus’s desk and sat down. Janus waved his hand and he was in his normal attire, face mask and robe gone but the wine glass in his hand stayed as he sat on the edge of his bed, “So, Patton, what do you need help with? Got your cat stuffie stuck on the ceiling fan again and need my cane to get it?” he asked with an eyebrow raise.

Patton shook his head a little and then sighed, clasping his hands together as he took a deep breath, “No, I-.... I need you to pretend to be Roman tomorrow and get into Logan’s room,” He said quickly, his face burning slightly with the shame that came with asking such a thing.

Janus’s eyes widened and he sighed, “I must have drank too much, Patton, dear, I’m afraid I misheard you, can you repeat that?” He said though he heard Patton quite clearly, he was giving him a chance to explain himself.

“I-I need you to pose as Roman, please. Apparently Logan let Roman in his room and I’m not sure what’s going on but- but I need you to do this for me!” he said, begging the other, “please, Janus,”

Janus gave him a look, “Patton, you cannot be serious, you are Thomas’s sense of morality and yet you sit here and ask me to violate one of my best friend’s trust by impersonating another one of my best friends behind his back?!”

“I know how it sounds but you have to trust me,”

“This is insane! If Logan trusted Roman enough to let him in that’s a big deal. He didn’t trust me that much, he didn’t trust Virgil or Remus that much, and he sure didn’t trust you that much,” He snapped.

Patton shrunk back a little, tearing up, “I-I know, I-I-I’m sorry, I’m just…. I’m so worried about him, Janus,” he said softly, looking up at him with pleading eyes, “It’s just one time, I only want to know if he’s ok and I’ll never ask you to do anything like this ever again I pinky double super extra duper promise!”

Janus just looked up at him before looking away. “It took me… so long to get accepted. I finally was able to be with you guys and we’re happy. If I do this and the others, or worse, Thomas finds out then not only will Logan and Roman be hurt but I’ll be shipped right back to the dark mindscape. I can’t do that again, Patton.”

Patton’s expression softened, “Janus… we’re not going to ‘unaccept’ you,” he said softly, “You’re family now, kiddo, and if they send you off they’ll have to send me off too because this was all my idea in the first place.”

Janus ran a hand through his hair and he sighed, “Patton I-”

“Kiddo,” Patton cut him off, “I’m not gonna force you to do anything you don’t want to, just know i’m only worried about Logan, you don’t have to do any of this, ok?”

Janus nodded a little, taking deep breaths, “ok… can I-... can I think about it?”

Patton smiled and nodded, “of course, kiddo, take all the time you need,” Patton said, standing and moving to leave but taking Janus’s wine glass as he did.

“Hey, give that back,”

“Kiddo, its eleven pm, you shouldn’t be drinking wine this late,”

“You’re no fun” He stuck his tongue out at Patton and Patton just laughed as he left the room. Janus sighed, flopping back onto his bed and summoning a new glass of wine. He was going to need it if he was going to make this decision.

-------

Oh what are they gonna doooooooo????? How will Ro react? What will Janus choose? Is Patton making the right choice? So MaNy QuEsTiOnS tHaT i DoN’t HaVe ThE aNsWeR tO!!!

Fangs Au Tag:

@did-he-just-hiss-at-me @aegis-the-ace @occasional-fander @thefivecalls @wishthefish916 @osdd1b-partner-system-dynamics

#because i can #my writings #Fangs Au #sanders sides #thomas sanders #logan sanders #roman sanders #patton sanders #janus sanders #tw fangs #fangs #tw slight body horror #slight body horror #tw food #food #tw eating #eating #tw spying #spying #tw alcohol #alcohol

[ambersky0319]

Dumb idea from a tired Rayne: Logan, who doesn't want to date Roman, keeps telling him "___ and then maybe I'll date you" so later you have Roman looking practically like a fucking clown as he tries to recite Shakespeare in full garbwhile also trying to speak in a perfect accents with the mind palace looking like a galaxy, only for Roman to find out after while he was practicing his brother and Deceit asked Logan out and he said yes, and he tried to tell Roman but he refused to listen.

This doesn’t have a happy ending, but it’s also not a bad ending?

Ships : One-sided Logince, Platonic Logince, Romantic Intruloceit

Warnings : Leading people on, miscommunication, let me know if there's anything else that I should add!

Masterpost 

----------------------------------------

It wasn't that Logan didn't like Roman. He did, in complete honesty, Logan loved spending time with Roman, he loved being Roman's friend. But that's where it ended.

Being Roman's friend.

So when Roman confessed that he had feelings for Logan, he didn't know what to do. How do you reject someone, and then say it's because he just got into a relationship with said someone's brother and his partner?

But that's the thing. Logan tried to say that. But every time he got near the answer 'no' Roman would fall into another round of rambling that lasted anywhere between five to twenty minutes. It got to the point that Logan just... Gave up on trying to outright reject him.

Instead, he started giving Roman impossible tasks to do.

He didn't expect it to backfire so terribly on him though.

Logan sighed loudly as he collapsed onto the couch within the dark commons, right by Deceit who set his book down to console his annoyed boyfriend. Remus was nowhere to be found, probably in the Imagination. Logan just wished he could cuddle them both right now, that would surely cheer him up.

Deceit gently pulled him into his arms, pressing soft kisses to his temple as he started to massage Logan, slowly drawing circles on his back. Logan made a soft, strangled noise as he curled closer to Deceit.

"What's happened now?" Deceit hummed. He and Remus knew of Logan's predicament, and both knowing how well Roman took rejection, weren't able to give Logan any ideas on how to tell Roman that he wasn't interested, not without letting their own relationship slip.

"He- He actually learned Latin and performed not five, but ten original poems! And! He actually changed his sash to that awful gray that he hates!" Logan let his head fall into Deceit's neck, huffing and shaking his head.

"I told him that he needs to perform an entire Shakespeare play all by himself looking like Pennywise using time-accurate accents and in garb and that the entire mind palace must look like a galaxy."

Deceit began threading his fingers through Logan's hair. "What are you going to do if he actually succeeds in this one?"

"Honestly?" Deceit hummed in confirmation. "I have no fucking clue."

Silence filled the dark commons for a long while. Logan was far less tense now but refused to move out of Deceit's lap. Not that Deceit minded. But then Deceit broke the comforting quiet.

"Remus and I were talking earlier, about maybe to put a stop to this we just... All come out."

Logan shifted only slightly, frowning against Deceit's neck. "I thought that's what we were trying to avoid?"

"Well, we've been dating for what, four months now? And Roman has been doing this for about three. No matter how the others react, we'll stay together, and Roman can work on moving on and accepting that you aren't interested." Deceit continued to run his fingers through Logan's hair, no knots remained but he knew it was helping Logan relax. "We're ready to come out. If you aren't though, that's fine, and Remus and I can always help you come up with something-"

Before Deceit could finish, there was a crash as the Imagination door slammed open, and Remus came stumbling down the stairs cursing up a storm.

"Remus?" Logan asked hesitantly when Remus started to tug at his hair and pace. Remus barely glanced at them.

"I fucked up, guys I fucked up royally- Roman's pissed, he's so incredibly pissed oh my god, guys-"

"Hey, hey, Remus," Logan shifted out of Deceit's arms a bit for the first time in quite a while. "Come sit down, and maybe explain what happened?"

Remus did, settling down on Deceit's other side and welcoming the embrace from both Logan and Deceit. He then went on to explain how Roman had unconsciously wandered into Remus's part of the Imagination, where Remus had been talking with Hope about Deceit and Logan, getting suggestions from Hope on how to handle the situation if Logan didn't want to tell anyone yet. He described how Roman now knew that they were all together, and how he looked so incredibly heartbroken but also so pissed, and Remus wasn't able to tell if it was at Remus and Deceit, or Logan.

Once he was done, Logan groaned loudly, head falling back to hide in Deceit's shoulder. He said something, but it was muffled by Deceit's shirt. Remus clung to Logan, burrowing his face in Logan's hair. "Maybe we can just give Roman amnesia, y'know, and no one will know!"

"I don't think giving your brother a concussion is a good idea, Remus."

"At least it's an idea!"

Logan shook his head, taking a deep breath. "No, I'm going to have to talk with him. But... but I think I'll talk to Roman tomorrow. Hopefully he'll be willing to listen, I doubt he will be right now."

"You sure, Lo?"

Logan nodded, moving so he could press a light kiss to Remus's cheek. "I just really want to spend time with you both. And maybe this'll be safer."

"Alright..."

-

The next morning, Logan rose up in front of Roman's room. It was too early for Patton or Virgil to be awake, but Roman often got up around the same time as Logan. He knocked lightly on the door, and it took a minute and Logan was just about to knock again when he heard a lock click and the door slowly opened. Logan bit his lip as he felt his heart figuratively break at the sight before him, Roman with irritated eyes and hair so tangled one brush would never be able to help tame it. He looked so pale, too, and he wobbled slightly in place as he processed just who was at his door.

When it finally caught up to him that it was Logan, Roman attempted to shut the door. But Logan stuck his foot out to stop it. "We really need to talk-"

"I don't want to see you, Logan."

"Please, Roman?"

". . ."

"I just want to explain things. You don't need to actually respond, but you need to hear me out. And then, if you no longer want to be friends, then I'll just leave you alone from now on. I won't even take long, I just need five minutes."

Roman hesitated, before sighing in defeat and he sulked back into his room, letting Logan enter. He sat on the bed and just stared at Logan. "Five minutes. Go."

Logan took a deep breath. "First, I wanted to apologize. It was wrong of me to lead you on like I did, getting your hopes up that I might reciprocate your feelings when in fact I wasn't only not interested, but was seeing other sides.

"Next, the only reason why I kept doing that is because any time I tried to tell you no, or that I wasn't interested, you would cut me off, or refuse to listen. I tried each and every time to get you to listen and I failed, so I gave you more and more ridiculous tasks thinking you would eventually give up. And then you didn't. And I just had no idea what to do, because I still wanted to be frends, I love being friends with you, but I don't like you how you like me and I just- I'm um, I'm just really sorry, Roman."

Logan held his breath as he watched Roman for any reaction, holding Roman's gaze. Roman took in a shuddering breath, before glancing to the side, frown tugging at his lips.

"And you were with my brother and Deceit the entire time...?"

"... Yes."

Roman closed his eyes for a moment, processing everything that Logan had said. When it seemed that he finally did, he exhaled slowly, still not looking at Logan.

"I'm still mad, Logan, I'm still hurt. But... But I don't want to not have you in my life. I still want you around. It wouldn't be the same with you gone- and I- fuck, Logan, I'm sorry for not listening... I should have, this all could've been avoided." Roman held his head in his hands. "Just... can, can we come back to this in a few days?"

Logan nodded hastily. Roman glanced at him for a moment before looking back down at the floor. "I'll see you later, Logan."

Logan hugged himself as he left Roman's room, summoning a water bottle for him before he left. God, this wasn't how he wanted things to turn out...

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[intruality-overlord]

Why Are We (Best) Friends?

Warnings: excessive swearing, alcoholism, mentions of drugs, drug use, suggestive humor, implied sexual content (no smut), some gore descriptions. Generally, Remus stuff.

Taglist: @blogging-time @veraisnotfine @littlestr @jessibbb @broken-pens @hi-its-tutty @idkanameatall @moxiety--sanders101 @theyluna-womoon

Let me know if you want to be added or removed from the taglist! Updates every Wednesday/Thursday. *yeets fluff for thy soul’s consumption*

Chapter Six: Ducks

Bubble Bath

August 14th, 2018.

“Five? Normally you’re sated by three,” Patton said incredulously.

Sloshing water over the tub’s edge, their knees knocked together. Patton and Remus’s bones had become saturated with warm water, and the bubbles were seeping in now too.

“I got worked up badly.”

“But five!—“ Patton’s rasping voice broke into a cough. Remus reached out on impulse to touch his throat as if to soothe. It at least brought comfort as Patton pressed into the heat of his palm. The action encouraged Remus to curl his fingers, but he didn’t dare apply any pressure. Turning relaxed and pliable, the full, bowling ball weight of Patton’s head fell trustingly in his grip. Even his eyes slipped closed, the little puppy.

(Poor, touch starved thing, taking every morsel of affection so hungrily like it could cure years of neglect.)

“I’m sorry,” he sincerely said, “I shouldn’t of— I, I never should have asked this of you.” Gaze settling on the froth of bubbles steadily dissolving in the water, his hand fell away.

Only for Patton to catch it. He brought Remus’s hand to his lips, kissing the back like a gentleman. He shook his head fondly. “I know I can say no. Stop worrying.”

“Yeah, but still, Moonshine. I should restrain myself more—”

Sparing his tender throat, Patton abandoned his voice in favour of booping Remus’s nose. That shut him up. He choked on a surprised laugh, tossing his head back. Wanting to giggle himself, Patton just smiled at him while his stomach clenched. When Remus stopped laughing, he winced and rubbed the back of his neck.

Patton tugged Remus forward by his hand still clasped in his, and positioned him with his back to his chest. Deft hands delicately came to hold Remus’s neck, just beneath his jaw. His thumbs threaded into the baby hairs at his nape. (The brief thought of being strangled to death, his body left floating in the bathtub framed as a tragic, accidental drowning crossed his mind. Remus had the compulsion to blurt it out, yet ground his teeth.) Tilting his head just so… Click-ck! And the other way… Cra-a-ack. Air trapped between the segments popped like thunder. Shivers ran through him, soothing the kink in his neck, but consequently triggering a different kink (one he didn’t even know he had until right then). “God, I didn’t realise I needed that,” he sighed appreciatively.

Migrating, Patton settled one hand on Remus’s ribs flexing from the aftershocks of his boisterous, rumbling laughter. Patton could feel Remus’s scurrying rabbit heart. De-dum, de-dum— de-de-de-dum, dum. De-dum. Remus’s rabbit heart hopped beneath his palm. Loud, rough, and wild, it nudged at Patton affectionately. His heart had always beaten a little faster, a little harder. A little more passionate than it should, leading it to stumble and hiccup occasionally. Every beat, his heart plucked his muscles like the strings of a viola, each pizzicato note a jolt singing through his body. In contrast, the base of his lungs took short yet deep breaths. Wisps of curly, deep cinnamon seasoned, caramel chest hair grasped and coiled around Patton’s fingertips.

Then, trying to coax out another laugh, Patton ruffled his hair.

And white powder clinging on got displaced from Remus’s fringe, sprinkling the water and suds.

Patton gasped, “That’s why!” (The “I should’ve known” went unsaid.) Being so used to seeing that streak of silver, Patton had forgotten entirely how and why it was there in the first place.

…

“I tried to distract myself but the two weren’t a good combination.”

Trust

February 7th, 2019.

Glue splattered on Patton’s face as soon as he popped up in Remus’s room. (Well, he thought it was something else first, but quickly noticed it was stone cold, so no.) Fucking perfect. Patton had just walked in on the funeral of a monstrous glob of red and white paper mache of intimidating stature. It had a fresh, gaping, fist sized hole in it, dripping like a miscellaneous orifice.

Mindlessly munching on a pencil, Remus stood back to scrutinise his work. That wouldn’t do. Remus summoned his Morningstar over his shoulder. “How do you like this, katoptronophile?!” Remus cackled. His morningstar ploughed through the mache mound vaguely where a head would be in one swift(ish) swing. More pulp splattered Patton’s face.

“Really, Remouse?” He whined exasperatedly. Only just noticing him, Remus chirped, “Patton! Could you help me hide the body? I don’t have enough stomach acid to dissolve the whole corpse. Wait—” Remus spat out his chew toy of a pencil, carving “ass” into the remaining mulch puddle like a signature. “Hope Double Dee won’t be too heartbroken,” he muttered thoughtfully, “Eh, whatever.”

“Dear lord, you’re high as a kite.”

“High as a kite? Kites can’t go to space!” Remus babbled, doing a little theatrical twirl. “Think of what kind of aliens you can find in space! Do you think any of them have tentacles?!” Losing his balance, he stumbled into Patton slumping on his shoulder. Unbothered, Patton patiently waited for Remus to right himself whenever he wanted.

“Did you get stuck into the cookie jar again?” Patton asked casually as he wiped and flicked off various substances from his face and glasses. Doing a double take, that red better not be blood. Using blood sweat and tears isn’t ethical, they’ve talked about this!

“What? No! Of course not! Now, Puppy, why have you got a rabbit on your head and haven’t even introduced me yet?! Who’s this little handsome little fella? He looks like a George,” and Remus dissolved into a fountain of cooing while he ran his fingers through Patton’s hair. (Patton tried not to fucking moan at how good his nails felt scraping against his scalp.)

“Oh, the shrooms…” Patton sighed, “His name is Harold. Harold George—“

“The third! I remember now! How could I forget you? You’re so soft.”

Indulging Remus was Patton’s favourite hobby.

“God, you’re so soft I wanna strangle you and skin you so I can have your soft fur all to myself,” Remus ranted and Patton tried not to show fear. It wasn’t that hard, really... Mostly because he was trying even harder to choke down a begging whimper scrambling onto his tongue. Remus grabbed chunks of his hair in each fist tugging lightly. Patton reminded himself that they weren’t impulses Remus would act on and that he had these thoughts constantly just didn’t tend to share them. “But I won’t cause you’re just too cute, my little mammal brethren.”

Patton wasn’t as cute as his bunny, he thought, but he’d take the compliment.

“Hey do you want some?” Remus offered his pencil to “Harold.”

…

“Fine, suit yourself.” And he ate the rest like a carrot.

Shoulders slacking, Patton huffed fondly.

“I kind of wish you were like this— open— more…” Patton smoothed down Remus’s wrinkled clothes. “I hope you know you don’t need to filter everything you say,” he continued as he fixed his mussed hair with practiced hands. “It doesn’t change anything. You’re my best friend. I’ll never stop loving you, all of you. I don’t love you in spite of your so-called flaws, I love those parts of you just as much as the rest of you.”

That’s what true love means, whatever form it shall take.

Patton made a mental note to tell him that again once he came down. (Sometime, eventually…)

Remus wrapped him in a bear hug, squeezing just tight enough that he felt his ribs flex, but not painfully. “Whoa,” Remus said when he pulled back, eyes wide, “You should keep your skin on, bones and muscle isn’t a good look for you.”

“Silly Snow Bunny.”

Butterfly Kisses

April 16th, 2019.

“You know, once Thomas asked us all to say “I love you” to each other.”

Remus looked up from his sketchbook that rested on Patton’s arm looped around him. It was a typical day bundled in cat and kraken onesies respectively.

“…yeah?” He encouraged him to continue. How Patton’s pitch dropped made Remus draw suspenseful suspicions. Taking a sip of his rum, Patton prepared himself for potential embarrassment. He tapped his glass, listening to the quiet ringing it sang.

“I… I told them all that I loved them. So much. And I really meant it,” Patton said, earnestness framing his words. “I told them that I would give them all butterfly kisses,” Patton chuckled at his own stupid, emotional-ness, “which they ignored, of course.”

Remus leaned backwards into Patton’s chest, trading comfort in the currency of body heat. Peach pink lips mulling over heavy words came into view as Remus tipped his head back. He rested his head on his collarbone, and Patton’s breath rustled his hair. He listened intently— Listened closer to these next heavy words than Patton’s previous ramblings. “But—” Patton swallowed, adam’s apple bobbing, “But Logan could hardly get out the words, Roman was really reluctant, and Virgil refused to say it entirely.”

“Well, I love you,” Remus said, no hesitation.

Patton was star struck.

“R-really?”

“You’re my best friend. Of course I do,” Remus said like it was a no brainer— Since it was.

Voice muffled in his next sip, Patton softly said, “You’re my best friend, too.” He was smiling so much, and ended up biting the glass he hid behind. Mustn’t giggle and disturb the lake of quaint quiet with ripples.

“Butterfly kisses are the ones with the eyelashes, right?”

“Uh-m, yea— huh?”

In Patton’s lap, he craned his neck over his shoulder rather than swiveling around. Leaning in, warm huffs of air skating across their skin, he fluttered his eyelashes against Patton’s cheek. His nose prodded lightly at Patton’s jaw. Specks of white powder dusted onto his cheek from Remus’s fringe, which he quickly wiped off.

Patton became still and quiet as dawn. Dawn when the moon hasn’t said goodbye, and the birds haven’t said good morning yet.

“Teacup?” Remus murmured worriedly. Did he overstep a line (drawn in chalk and scrubbed away by time)? No, no— “Thomas must remember that icecream he ate yesterday, should I fetch some from the kitchen?” Remus attempted to quickly mend.

“No…” Pin drop silence squeezed between their synced inhale and exhale.

“No, jus…” Patton drifted off, setting down his half empty glass. (In second thoughts, he hoped he hadn’t drunk enough to fray or lose this memory.) His newly empty arm draped around Remus’s torso, and Remus tugged his arms close like a well worn winter coat.

“Stay…”

Next Chapter:

#WAW(B)F? #sander sides #thomas sanders #ts sander sides #sanders sides #ts sanders sides #patton sanders #ts patton #remus sanders #ts remus #intruality #moduke #thomas sanders sides

[flirtingwitharson]

Prompt: Sirius and Remus + mistletoe?

“James,” Sirius warned as he walked back in the front door to their shared flat, his hands laden with shopping bags. “Not this year, mate, come on.”

“It’s the holidays, have a bit of spirit!” James yelled back. It was Christmas Eve, and James and Sirius were hosting their annual Marauder family get-together. In typical James-and-Sirius fashion, they had left all of the decorating and setting up for just hours before people were to arrive.

“You can’t keep fucking trying to get us under the mistletoe, you dickhead, you know it’s deeper than that and you know you’re being a child.”

By us, Sirius was of course referencing the seemingly taboo topic of himself and one Remus John Lupin. Anyone with two eyes could see that the pair were head over heels for one another, and James had been pushing to get them together since they were at least seventeen. Now, at the ripe age of twenty one, he was still not-so-subtly trying to catch them under the mistletoe so they could, in his words, “snog, shag, and get married already.”

James huffed and took the leaves down from the doorway, leaning forward to give Sirius a quick hug and lend him a hand with the groceries. “Let’s not have our knickers in a twist on Christmas, yeah?” He said as he laid bags out on their kitchen table and began to unload groceries and the like.

“Yes, mum,” Sirius bit out in reply. “Where’s darling Lily, is she still lending me a hand in the kitchen? I can’t possibly make the roast without her, I season it all wrong.”

With James’ affirmation and a well-timed knock on the door, Sirius’ mind was put off of the melancholy note that rang out when Remus crossed his mind.

Three hours, two glasses of spiked eggnog, and one wonderfully seasoned meal later, people had begun to arrive. Euphemia and Fleamont Potter—ever the earliest to arrive and one of the last to leave—arrived first, for which both James and Sirius were happy, simply because neither had seen their parents in a bit of time. Peter and his girlfriend followed, and then people were all arriving at the same time and Sirius no longer cared to keep track. He tried to surreptitiously keep an eye out for honey-brown curls and a horrid yet endearjng jumper, but to no avail, for James mumbled a quiet, “he’ll be here, Pads, calm your tits,” in his ear.

“Stop it, you ponce, I know he’ll be here—“ Sirius snapped back, until he was interrupted by a pair of familiarly lanky arms around his neck from behind.

He turned around and couldn’t even find it in himself to be ashamed of the too-wide grin that took his snarl’s place. “Hiya, Moony,” he threw out as he was released from the man’s grip, if only so he could hug James.

“Heard you were doubting I’d come, then, hmm?” Remus grinned back. His jumper was just as billowy and ugly at first sight as Sirius had envisioned, but he felt his heart melt to jelly as soon as he noticed it had the phases of the moon and the Lupus constellation stitched onto the front.

“I never!” Sirius replied in mock offense, hardly even noticing James leave the conversation for his girlfriend on the otherwise of the room. It was so easy for Sirius to get lost in Remus—his eyes, his smiles, his ethereal goddamn presence; after five years of being irrevocably in love with the man, he still hadn’t gotten used to it. “Er, do you want to go put those under the tree, then?” He asked, pointing to the boxes by Remus’ feet and looking down to hide the red on his cheeks after he realized he was staring.

“Yes,” Remus nodded. “I’ll go do that.” He bent to pick up the gifts but stood again, adding as if as an afterthought, “Oh, I forgot to mention. I couldn’t exactly, uh, warrant the trip back to Wales this year, so I’ll be here in London for the holiday. I know it’s very last minute, but I’d really rather not spend it alone...”

Sirius rolled his eyes and shoved at Remus’ shoulder playfully. “Of course I’m not letting you spend bloody Christmas alone, you bastard. You know the Potters love you, they’ll be so happy to be able to give you your gift in person. Why didn’t you tell us sooner?”

It was Remus’ turn to blush this time, and Sirius tried to commit the visual to memory. “I was trying my damnedest to scrounge something up to go and see them, and I almost took the hit to my pride and asked you for a loan, but I realized I haven’t spent Christmas with you lot since we were fifteen and I found I missed being in London for the hols.”

Smiling to himself, Sirius bent and scooped up Remus’ things and handed them to him. “I’m glad you know you can always ask me for help, then,” he said, “and I’m really excited you’ll be with us tomorrow, but get outta here and go put these by the tree, I have people to feed.”

Another three hours saw people trickling out the door, only the Marauders four plus Lily and Sarah—Peter’s girlfriend—remaining. Many drinks, a successful meal, and plenty of gift giving and receiving was had. Sirius was the proud new owner of a new pair of Docs, several of his favorite albums on vinyl, and the comfiest jumper he had ever seen (from Remus, for secret santa, of course). His friends, of course, were all grateful for the plethora of thoughtful things he had gifted them in return.

“We have to make the few-hour drive to her parents, so we’re should go,” Peter announced as he stood and shrugged off his coat. “Another lovely Christmas Eve, cheers, you guys.”

“We’re for bed anyways,” James stated through a yawn. “Be safe, ring us when you get there.”

As Peter and Sarah said their goodbyes and left the flat, Sirius turned to Remus, who looked to be reluctantly reaching for his own coat. “Want to stay and listen to music for a bit?” He suggested, hoping Remus would give in easily and stay. “I mean, you can honestly just stay here and ride with the three of us in the morning, doesn’t make any sense if you drive separately.”

Remus’ shoulders immediately eased up and he nodded, following Sirius across the flat and into the door of his room. Shutting the door behind himself, he took in the room around him; he’d seen it a thousand times, but was always so enthralled by just how Sirius it was. The walls were painted a gloomy, darkish red, but every inch of the surface was covered. Images of musicians, album covers, photos of the Marauders from various stages of their life, and even drawings and paintings Sirius had done himself were all over. His record player lied on a table in the corner, next to a comfortable bay-window seat with a bookshelf stacked from floor to ceiling with records and CDs to the side of it. The bed was up against the far wall, and the frame was painted to look like the night sky; the artwork was done by Sirius, but the bedfeame itself and most of the other beautifully engraved wooden furniture in the room was Remus’ handiwork.

“There’s clothes in that bottom drawer that are likely to fit your tall arse, wear whatever,” Sirius pointed, interrupting Remus’ moment of infatuation. He went to shuck off his jeans and felt something in his back pocket, having completely forgotten it was there. He took it out and held it in his palm, carefully closing his fist around the item as he stood and walked over behind Sirius, who was rifling through his bookshelf for music to put on.

Remus stood behind Sirius, and with a short nod to summon confidence, he held the object in the air above them, waiting for Sirius to acknowledge his presence and turn around.

“Moony, quit being all quiet and—“ Sirius tutted. He stopped short as he turned around, looking up, then back at Remus again. His heart raced as he noticed what was undeniably mistletoe between Remus’ thumb and forefinger.

“Sirius Black, I think you and I both know fairly well that I’ve been in love with you for some time now,” Remus breathed out. “It was only recently that I finally believed that the feeling was certainly mutual, but I hadn’t had the bollocks to do anything about it, until now. So, this year, I figured I’d provide the mistletoe, s’much more romantic than James trying to rope us into it, I hope.”

Sirius blinked. He didn’t know why tears were coming to his eyes, and he would certainly deny the lump in his throat, but after a few seconds of stunned silence he leaned forward and kissed Remus, hard. “Happy fucking Christmas,” he mumbled against Remus’ lips when he pulled back breathlessly. “This is real, yeah? This is the long run, you’ll stick around?”

“Stick around? Pads, you’re stuck with me for as long as I live, damn it, seventy percent of the reason I stayed for Christmas was for you.”

Laughing, Sirius pressed his lips to Remus’ again. “Best present I’ve ever received, then,” he claimed. “I most definitely won’t be returning this one.”

#crimas time!!! #marauders christmas #marauders #marauders fic #ficmas #remus lupin #sirius black #wolfstar #moony #padfoot #james potter #peter pettigrew #prongs #wormtail #wolfstar fic #mwpp #remus x sirius #sirius x remus

[alwaysanotherrainbow]

aftermath

warnings: food mentions, remus gorey thoughts, sharp mention

ship: remrom

Remus has forgotten a card for Roman’s gift, and the two of them are left to clean up the aftermath from the Prince’s birthday party.

________________________________________________________________

It came as a shock to absolutely no-one that the common house was full of glitter after Roman’s party.

A dying Bluetooth speaker replayed Don’t Stop Believing, its music tinny and hollow as the vocals lapsed in and out and the phone’s virtual assistant sang Battery low over and over. Remus stuck some half-melted vanilla bean ice cream in the fridge before putting red velvet cake into the freezer; it took him a few seconds to rectify his mistake. 

Roman hummed as he swept up pieces of foil confetti. 

“I didn’t forget your gift, you know,” Remus said absentmindedly as he picked up a pompom and put it in a bag. “I wanted it to be ready for you, I didn’t wanna give you something bad or that you wouldn’t like.”

“If it’s from you, I’d like it.”

“If I gave you smallpox, you wouldn’t like it.”

“Well, that’s smallpox. No-one likes it. Besides, I don’t think that was what you were planning on giving me.”

“Shit, you’ve got me there.” Remus glanced around before jumping up and tugging down the tinsel-like Happy Birthday, Roman! banner. “There. Common room, restored.”

Roman dumped the confetti in the wastebin. “You’re right, dandelion. Back to its former glory.”

“If we can get the glitter off the ceiling.”

“Yeah..”

“How on earth did we get it there, anyways?”

“Probably with the saline water-balloon that we infused with glitter?”

Roman laughed, going to the fridge and grabbing himself a juicebox. “Want one?”

“Please.”

Remus liked stabbing the straw through the cardboard, not through the spot where the straw was meant to go. Roman drank his as it was meant to go, summoning some paper, crayons, and two pens, one green and one red.

“What’re you doing?”

“I’ve got an idea and I want to write it out,” said Roman. 

“You know... I forgot to write a card for my gift.”

“Dear, you don’t have to.”

“I know, but I want to.”

“...Hey, do you want to do what we used to, where we work on things together and compare?”

Remus nodded, grabbing a pen and getting to work.

It was a strange environment to work in, with the paper they were using still flecked with crimson glitter from the table. Roman shook his head at the scarlet crayon and reached for a brick-red at the same moment that Remus was carefully shading in his drawing with the ballpoint pen’s residue ink. From time to time, they took sips of their drinks.

“I’m done,” said Roman a few minutes after the Bluetooth speaker had died, flipping his paper so that it was impossible to see.

“I am, too.” Remus covered up the paper by leaning his upper body on the tabletop. “Don’t look at me like that, I promise it won’t smudge.”

“On the count of three, we reveal them.”

“Okay! One, knife--”

“...I’m sorry, knife?”

“To be completely fair to me, you did say on three, not that I couldn’t say knife.”

Roman smiled. “You know what, that’s fair.”

“All right.” They counted together. “One, knife, two, three!”

They revealed their drawings.

Roman stared at Remus’ ink-portrait. It was of surprisingly good quality, with Remus smiling as he pointed to a surprisingly non-gorey hole in his chest (it was shaped like a cartoon heart, just allowing the other side to show through) and a “Wanted” poster of Roman. It read, Handsome Prince wanted! He stole my heart. Reward: lots of kisses and cuddles. Happy birthday xx -- your dandelion >:)

“Is that for me?” whispered Roman. “You’ve beaten me at my own game. I.. I wanna keep it forever and ever.”

“You’re telling me?” Remus asked as he pointed to Roman’s work.

Roman’s drawing, on the other hand, was a pink rose dripping tar, drops of dew on it. It read in beautiful calligraphy, You’ve taken my breath away, dandelion. Thank you for an absolutely amazing year. -- your prince, forever yours.

“That’s a freaking masterpiece, Roman, I... Fuck, I’d embroider that onto my soul in a heartbeat. You can keep mine, it’s for you and no-one else.”

“I’ll find a nice frame for it. Something that nice ought to be displayed, if you’re okay with it.”

“I’m keeping this in my special-gifts-from-Roman chest and never ever letting anyone else hold it! Ooh, that reminds me.” He reached into his pocket. “I got you a really nice gift, I think you’ll like it-- here!”

He handed Roman a small brass contraption of gears and emblems. It was the size of a golfball, with all sorts of patterned perforations.

“Er, I love it, but what is it?”

“I’m giving you the stars.” Remus tapped it with his fingertip; the contraption began to glow. “Here, let’s go to the common living room.”

They stepped into the room adjacent to the kitchen. No-one else was there; however, it wasn’t free from the glitter that had defined Roman’s party. They’d need to clean it up later.

“Okay, we’re ready! Turn off the light!”

Roman flicked the switch.

The room sank into darkness, but all around them, glimmers of light began to shine. It was like a living night sky, constellations moving of their own accord and the glitter scattered from the party refracting back little pinpoints of starshine.

“And just tap it again to turn it off,” explained Remus. “So, er, what do you--”

“It’s perfect,” whispered Roman, taking a step towards the wall which now displayed Orion the Hunter, which gently moved along. “It’s so wonderful... You literally gave me the stars?”

“Psh, it was nothing! I am glad you like it, though.”

“Remus, I don’t know how I’m going to outdo you for your birthday. Nothing could top this.”

“Heck, no need to worry about outdoing me! You don’t even have to get me anything.”

“But I want to.”

“Sweetie, I’ll love anything you give me, and I do mean absolutely anything.”

Roman smiled. “You know what I wished for this year, and what I’m wishing for on these stars?”

Remus leaned in for a kiss; when Roman leaned forward, too, he pressed his lips to his. 

“Don’t tell me,” whispered Remus when they pulled apart, “or it won’t come true.”

“It just did come true, though, when you pressed your lips against mine.”

“You hopeless romantic, you.”

“It is in my name. Er, or am I in its name...? Well, it doesn’t matter. Thanks, dear dandelion.”

Remus smiled, wrapping his arm around Roman’s waist as they settled onto the sofa. “Happy birthday, Princey.”

#remrom #remrom fic #my fics #my writing #happy late birthday to the Prince

[deadanddeactivated]

Changes

So @figurative-siren-song posted a thing today and uhh apparently i was really in the mood to write some heavy angst. This was before i was having a really shitty day (tbh when i wasnt having a shitty day it had a happy ending).

Anyway no fancy post editing because tumblr mobile sucks, please enjoy

AO3

--

The sides weren't like real people.  They couldn't just… reinvent themselves or change the way a real person could.  When the sides wanted to change, they had to break apart. Become a fragment of their old selves, and let the other fragments fade.

Virgil knew a thing or two about changing.

Not like De, who was still self-preservation no matter what he called himself.   Or like the twins, who couldn't even remember King tearing himself in two.

Forgetting didn't work so well for Virgil.  Instinct wouldn't have made the mistakes Fear and Anxiety had.  

Then again, Instinct was the one that started the whole mess.

(It's not like the memories had stayed away anyway.  Not like with the twins. Virgil supposed he should have expected that.  It just wasn't in his nature to forget, even if he couldn't remember what he wasn't forgetting.)

The point is, Virgil knew a thing or two about changing.  

So the pit in his stomach didn't really come as a surprise.  He knew the risks. Lifetimes ago Instinct and King had talked about them at length.

"Hey Roman."  Virgil greeted that morning, hoping Roman didn't notice how tense his smile was.  "You want to spar or something today?" 

"Don't distract me!"  Roman declared, yanking a snack from the cupboard and turning back towards his room.  "I have to get this project done! Thomas is depending on me!"

"Oh."  Virgil breathed, even though Roman was already gone.  Patton walked in next, offering a smile as he prepared a quick breakfast of sugary cereals.

"Good morning Virgil!"  He greeted.

"Morning Pat."  Virgil returned the smile, even if it didn't  reach his eyes. "Hey, do you maybe want to bake today?  I think we're running low on cookies."

"Oh that sounds swell!"  Patton said. "But Thomas is feeling a bit disheartened at the moment, I need to spend the day lifting his spirits!"

"Right, of course."  Virgil mumbled. 

"Thanks for understanding kiddo, we'll bake tomorrow."  Patton assured, planting a kiss atop Virgil's head as he passed.

"Tomorrow, right."  Virgil agreed, looking down at his hand.  Tomorrow.

Logan was already at work when Virgil knocked at his door. 

"Yes?"  He asked, sounding a little annoyed at being interrupted.  Virgil hesitated, biting his lip a moment before pushing on.

"I was just wondering if you wanted to go stargazing, maybe."  Virgil suggested. "The sky in Remus' side of the mindscape always does cool things when you're around."

"My apologies Virgil but I am busy preparing next week's schedule.  Perhaps we can go some other time." Logan refused and immediately turned back to his work, assuming the conversation to be over.  Virgil just sighed, stepping from the room and wondering what now.

As he was turning to his own room, thinking of maybe writing a letter, the rundown door at the end of the hall caught his eye.  

Trying in person couldn't do any harm, right?

Stepping through to the other side of Thomas' mind, Virgil was a little surprised to find he remembered exactly how to get to the living room.  He even remembered which of the floorboards creaked and which would break if he stood on them. It was actually a little bit of fun and by the time he found De, reading on the couch, he was smiling.

"He De!"  He greeted.  "Wanna hang out?"

"Why?"  De hissed, destroying Virgil's good mood.  "I'm sure the others didn't send you here to spy on me."

"What? No, I just wanted to-"

"Don't save it."  De spat, standing.  "You didn't choose your side, don't live with it."  Without another word, De walked off.

That…

That didn't go the way Virgil was hoping.

But it's alright, he told himself.  There was still Remus. Hopes high, Virgil eventually found the green side in his side of the imagination.

"Remus!"  He called, waving.  The glare Remus shot his way made Virgil stagger back.

"Fuck off."  The duke growled.

"Wait, Remus-" But before Virgil could speak, throned vines rose from the ground to separate them.

"I said fuck off."  Remus repeated.

Oh.

Right.

Okay.

That's…

That's fine.  

It's fine.  

Virgil will just try again tomorrow, right?

But even as he thought it, Virgil knew he wouldn't last that long.  He didn't have the drive to fight against the growing pit in his chest.

Wiping his eyes, Virgil knew there was really only one thing left to do.  It still took him another moment to sink out.

"Virgil!"  Thomas startled as Virgil appeared, jumping back from his computer. "Uh, not that I'm complaining but what are you doing here?  I'm not anxious."

"I know."  Virgil said, leaning against the back of the couch and looking off to the side.  "I just, wanted you to know that I'm proud of you. You're doing a great job."

"Thanks?"  Thomas frowned, sounding unsure.  "Is everything alright man?"

"Yeah."  Virgil lied.  "It's nothing I wasn't prepared for."  He took a deep breath and forced himself to look at Thomas.  "Bye Thomas." He said.  

Then, in a blink, he was gone.

Instinct sat with King a lifetime ago.

"If you break apart you might fade."  Instinct warned.

"I'm going to tear myself apart no matter what."  King argued. "Maybe this way I'll survive it."

"It's too dangerous." Instinct argued.

"It's my only choice."  King shrugged. "I'm going to forget this.  I don't want the mini mes to know about this, just in case they keep breaking.  In case they become something so small, Thomas doesn't need them anymore."

"Thomas is always going to need his creativity."  Instinct claimed.

"Not this one he doesn't.  I don't make sense to him anymore."  King sighed. "Look after them, won't you?"

"...I will."  When King broke he tried for two perfect halves and yet Virgil's pretty sure there were pieces missing.  Things so very King that went to neither Roman nor Remus.

Years later Instinct sat alone.  

Thomas wasn't listening to him, the sides weren't listening to him.  He couldn't be sure if it was Morality turning Patton, and therefore all of Thomas, against him.  Or was it Thomas' new ideas of instincts being somehow lesser than normal thoughts. Maybe it was Instinct himself athat had pushed them away.

Whatever the cause, the problem remained.  Thomas wasn't listening to him. The sides weren't listening to him.  He couldn't do his job like this.

What was the solution?

King.  King was.  

That night, something in Instinct broke and he ceased to be.  

Fear arrived in the mindscape a few days later.

Fear had long since broken into Anxiety when the memories started flooding back.  Spurred on by desperate attempts to remember a name he wasn't sure he had.

And with those memories came a realization.

Anxiety was a fragment of a fragment.  He was too small a side. Instinct could handle a change in Thomas.  But Anxiety? One wrong change and he'd cease to be.

That night Anxiety tried to leave first, hoping it might hurt less.

Now, fading into Thomas' subconscious, Virgil was glad he stuck around.  He just wished he had longer, to fix the things he broke.

But Anxiety wasn't like Emotions or Logic or Creativity.   Next to them he was just a small part of Thomas. A part Thomas could manage himself now.  He didn't need Virgil.

Would the others notice, Virgil wondered.  Would they realize what he'd been asking for all day? 

Would they care?

Virgil didn't have long left to ponder that.

None of the sides were particularly happy to be called for an unscheduled meeting, all rather busy.  However they couldn't just ignore a summons from Thomas. Patton, Logan, and Roman appeared together and yet Thomas looked around desperately, like he was looking for something.

"Is everything alright kiddo?"  Patton frowned.

"You threw off my groove!"  Roman claimed.

"Where's Virgil?!"  Thomas asked, panicked.

"Why he's right-"  Logan cut himself off, turning to see Virgil's regular spot empty.  "That's odd." He frowned.

"Did something happen?"  Patton asked.

"I don't know!  He just, he popped in and he said he was proud of me and then he was just, gone!"  Thomas explained.

"But you clearly still have your anxiety."  Logan noted. "You acted rather different when you didn't."

"Then it can only be one thing!"  Roman declared. "Rise, you fiends!"  At his shout, Deceit and Remus find themselves appearing.

"Oh yes, this is exactly what I wanted to do today."  Deceit claimed, rolling his eyes.

"What did you do to him?!"  Roman demanded.

"Who? Jeffery Dahmer?"  Remus asked, tilting his head with a smirk.

"I believe he's asking if you've seen Virgil."  Logan clarified.

"Not at all."  Deceit huffed. "He certainly didn't try to trick me into 'hanging out' with him."

"Me too!"  Remus gasped.  "So I skewered him with thorns!"

"Remus!"  Patton exclaimed.

"Okay so I didn't skewer him."  Remus grumbled. "But I tried! And that's what counts!"

"Virgil must have been real desperate if he went to you two for company."  Roman muttered.

"He did ask if I could spend time with him, unfortunately I was busy with the schedule."  Logan said.

"He asked me too."  Patton realized.

"Geez, what would make our local loner desperate for company all of a sudden?"  Roman asked.

"His room."  Patton whispered.  He sunk out quickly.

"Patton?"  Thomas called, concerned.

"What about Virgil's room?"  Remus questioned. "Is it dirty?"  He smirked.

When Patton rose up a moment later, his face was seldom enough to put them all on edge.  He opened his mouth to say something but instead found tears filling his eyes.

"Patton?"  Logan pressed.

"It's, it's gone!"  Patton managed through tears.

"Guess you lot weren't good enough for perfect ol Virgy either."  Remus smirked.

"No." Logan said, understanding washing over him.  "If his room is gone that means… Virgil faded."

"What?  No, that's impossible!  Thomas still has anxiety!"  Roman argued.

"Thomas will always have anxiety.  However, he no longer needs Virgil to manage it."  Logan explained, shaking his head and trying to pretend his hands weren't shaking.

"I still need Virgil!"  Thomas argued. "We have to bring him back!"

"I'm sorry Thomas, you don't need him.  Subconsciously, you know that." Logan said.

"But we can bring him back, can't we?"  Roman asked.

"No."  Patton sobbed.  "We can't." A thunk cut into the sense of grief falling over the sides.  Turning, they saw Remus had fallen to his knees.

"I…"  Remus' voice was a whisper, quieter than any side had heard it.  "I didn't let him talk. He tried to talk to me."

"He wasn't lying." De said.  "He was trying to say goodbye."

"He isn't gone!"  Remus screamed. "Maybe he's just, he just moved back, yeah?  Let's go check De, I bet he's picking a movie for movie night!"  He decided.

"Remus."  Deceit tried but Remus was already gone, racing through the mindscape for a room that wasn't there anymore.  Patton sobbed louder to the side but Deceit barely heard him.

Virgil tried to say goodbye.

Deceit never let him.

He's not going to get a second chance.

Another thunk rang through the room.

#turns out ill write even when i dont have a laptop to do so #i downloaded the app to do this #the app sucks #thomas sanders #sanders sides #writing #figurative-siren-song #fanfic #virgil #hurt no comfort #angst #virgil angst #virgil sanders #roman #roman sanders #remus #remus sanders #deceit #deceit sanders #patton #patton sanders #logan #logan sanders #instinct virgil

[sunflower-swan]

Wolfstar chapter 5

A/N: Here’s what you need to know: I created this story for Writer’s Month 2020. Every day is a new prompt, and therefore a new chapter. This is an AU Wolfstar where Remus is a tattoo artist next door to Sirius who manages a flower shop. James and Lily are alive in this universe and own a coffee shop across the street. And to make parts of the story work with the prompts, Remus is about 10 years older than Sirius. It also takes place more or less in present time, minus Covid-19.

This is chapter 5 of a multi-chapter work. If you’d like to start from the beginning, here is chapter 1.

Disclaimer: I don’t own these characters. I just like to play with them.

Day 5 Prompt: Soulmates

Rating: Explicit

Word Count: 1571

Tags: language, original character, smut, shower scene, oral sex, fellatio

A/N: Consider this your smut warning. Sirius and Silas decided to have make-up shower fun I had not anticipated at the end of this chapter. Who is in charge of these characters?! Or, in the immortal words of Pilot Wash, “Who’s flying this thing?!” Firefly...anyone? No? Hello, crickets.

Chapter 5

Sirius

Stevie Wonder, “All in Love is Fair”

All of fate's a chance

It's either good or bad

I tossed my coin to say

In love with me you'd stay

Sirius slowly sat up to a sitting position. He rested his elbows on his knees and hung his head. “I did something dumb.”

“I figured that much. Continue.”

He rubbed his hands together and let out a heavy sigh. “I got home late from the flower shop last night.” He paused and glanced at James. “More like, I got home early this morning, I guess.” Sirius turned his attention back to his hands and continued. “Silas had fallen asleep on the couch trying to wait up for me, and I accidentally woke him up. Then…” He covered his face with his hands. “...he said he needed to talk to me and it couldn’t wait until morning.”

James' expression softened and he moved to comfort his hurting friend as Sirius recounted what was said and what he did.

“...and then I passed out on your couch and woke up to Harry’s bony little knees in my stomach about 10 minutes ago.” Sirius finished.

Like a good friend, James had remained silent through all of Sirius’ story. “So,” he began, “you’ve not broken up?”

“No, but I was a right arsehole running away like I did.” He slouched back into the couch, and picked at his fingernails.

“That is true.” James agreed. “So how are you going to fix this?”

Fix this? Sirius rolled his eyes, incredulous at James' optimism.

At that moment, Lily padded into the living room with Harry in tow. “James, I told you we shouldn’t have set up the wards to allow Sirius in any time he wanted.” Sirius noticed there was a tiny hint of amusement in her annoyed tone. She made her way into the kitchen and added, “I’ll make us tea, shall I?”

James smirked. “Under the frosty exterior, she really is quite fond of you.”

“She must be if you were able to convince her to make me Harry’s godfather.” Sirius chuckled. Turning somber again, he roughed his hands through his hair and said, “What am I going to do, James?”

They sat in thoughtful silence until Lily returned with a tray of teacups. “Harry, hun, you want to go play in your room, and I’ll let you know when breakfast is ready?”

“Ok, Mum!” Harry hugged his mum’s leg before tottering off.

“What did you do?” Lily asked as she sat down.

They each grabbed a cup of tea, and James gave Lily the CliffsNotes version of how Sirius came to be on their couch that morning.

“What an arsehole.” Lily shook her head in disbelief at Sirius when James had finished recounting the story. “You know what you have to do first, right?”

“What?” Sirius asked.

“First, you pray to Merlin that young man doesn’t hold grudges. Then you beg his forgiveness.”

“Begging is at least one trick you’re good at, Pads.” James snickered.

Sirius picked up a throw pillow and whomped James in the head. “Damn it, James! You’re not helping!”

“Ok, ok!” James held his hands up in defence. “Sorry,” he said with a grin. “Couldn’t resist.”

Ignoring her idiot husband, Lily continued. “After Silas forgives you…”

Sirius scoffed.

“After Silas forgives you,” she repeated with emphasis. “Then you talk to him about whether he should go or not. And if he decides to go, then you talk about what that means for your relationship. And since he leaves tomorrow, that conversation should happen sooner rather than later.”

James and Sirius stared open-mouthed at the ease with which Lily laid out what needed to be done. Lily peered back with astute eyes and sipped her tea.

“It’s that simple.” She shrugged and left them to make breakfast.

“She has a way of cutting through the bullcrap, doesn’t she?”

“One of the reasons why I married her.” James said in awe. “Anyway, here's the real question Sirius: Do you love him?”

Sirius balked at the question. “What? I don’t know! I mean...maybe?” He stood and began to pace. Love? Godric, James! “How do I even answer that?” He felt the heat rise in his chest. “I think, James Potter, I think you forget how lucky you are.” He pointed a finger at his friend. “The rest of us mere mortals didn’t meet our soulmate when we were eleven years old. Notwithstanding the fact it took you six years to wear her down enough to agree to go out with you, you’re perfect together. And me…” Sirius stopped pacing long enough to catch his breath. “I’ve fucked up a lot of good relationships, and I don’t want to fuck up this one.”

“Then what are you still doing here, mate?”

~~~~~

Sirius opened the door to his flat as quiet as a mouse. He crept across the threshold and closed the door with a silent click. Silas was in the shower. He could hear the water running. Summoning his Gryffindor courage, he made his weary way toward the bathroom.

He stood with his palm on the bathroom door for a moment, gathering his thoughts. Apologize, beg forgiveness...Sirius sighed...hope he forgives me...figure it out from there...

Hot humid air rolled from under the door. The scent of fresh citrus mixed with leather clouded his senses. Sirius knocked softly once. Twice. Three times before entering.

A hoarse voice that he did not recognize as his own said, “Silas? I’m back.”

Silas stuck a sudsy head out of the shower. “I’m still not sure why you left.” His forehead creased. 

“Si…” Sirius didn’t know what to say to make this better. He leaned a shoulder against the wall next to the shower and exhaled. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry I’m a mess. And I’m sorry I left. And…”

This is your last warning. Turn back now if smut is not your jam.

An arm extended out of the shower and grabbed Sirius by the collar and pulled. The next thing he knew his lips were attacked. Their tongues wrestled for dominance in his mouth.

Silas broke the kiss and said, “I forgave you the moment you walked through the door. Now take off your clothes and get in here.”

Sirius didn’t need to be told twice. In a flash he had stripped and jumped in the shower. He took a moment to relish the hot water cascading over his tired body before he raked his hungry eyes over Silas’ naked form. He was stunning; an Adonis. Moisture glistened on his fit frame and his eyelids were heavy with lust. 

Shaking the water from his eyes, Sirius crossed the minute distance between them in less than a second. Silas gasped as Sirius claimed his mouth for his own. Wet bodies pressed together, Silas moaned into the lip bruising kiss. 

Sirius felt his arousal build, and he seized Silas’ hips and ground their pelvises, savoring the friction and feel of reciprocating hardness. Relinquishing Silas’ mouth, he nuzzled the crook of his neck, nibbling the sensitive pulse point he knew drove his boyfriend mad.

“Oh, Gods!” Silas panted and threw his head back. His chest rose and fell with rapid breaths as he slid a hand between them and grasped Sirius' needy length. He stroked with abandon.

Sirius trembled at the touch. “I’m supposed to be apologizing to you. Not the other way around,” Sirius growled in his ear. He slammed Silas against the cold tile wall, and elicited a sharp hiss from him. He moved from kissing neck to collarbone. From collarbone to chest. He ran a flat tongue across Silas’ skin, earning a whimper in response. Sirius could taste the remnants of citrus body wash. His body felt like it was on fire in his desire for this man. He nipped, and licked, and sucked all the way down Silas’ powerful torso to the rock hard erection between his legs.

“You are the most gorgeous man.” Sirius peered up into Silas’ heady eyes.

Silas ran a hand through Sirius’ hair, then cupped his chin and brushed a thumb over his lower lip. “I love you,” he whispered.

The world stopped spinning. Sirius’ breath hitched. His heart skipped at least three beats. Love? He loves me? With reckless abandon, Sirius ravaged his boyfriend’s cock like a man possessed. He poured every unsaid feeling into this moment.

Silas’ knees buckled at the sudden impale into Sirius’ warm and inviting mouth. He slapped a hand on the wall to keep himself upright, while the other hand fisted Sirius’ hair. His breaths quickened. “Fuck...Sirius. Not gonna...last long…”

Sirius redoubled his efforts, pumping the shaft with his hand while dancing his tongue around the head. With a thrust and a groan, Silas came undone.

The sound and feel of Silas’ orgasm was like rocket fuel to Sirius. His own erection was so taut that it was painful. His lust palpable. He stood and leaned against Silas for support. He placed one hand on the tile beside Silas’ head as he pumped his own cock with the other. In what seemed like no time, he came with a growl, and spurted on Silas’ flat abdomen.

Heavy breathing filled the air. The men gazed into each other's eyes.

“I…” Sirius swallowed. “I love you, too, Si.” He cupped Silas’ cheeks in his palms. “And...you should accept the grant. It’s only six months.”

Silas lips spread into a wide grin. He wrapped his arms around Sirius and pulled him into a soft kiss. Their lips were still grazing on each other as Silas said, “I’m starting to get pruny. Let’s get out of here.”

A/N: Welp...that smut snuck up on me. This chapter got away from me a little bit. You’re welcome. ;)

Next Chapter: Chapter 6

#writersmonth2020 #wolfstar #remus lupin #sirius black #remus x sirius #sirius x lupin #slow burn #alternate universe #harry potter #fanfiction #fanfic

[random-writes-blog]

What you are chapter 5

Remus heard quiet murmuring around him. He could feel the familiar, jello-like squish of his bed underneath him. He wanted to whine and pull his pillow over his face. It was far too early to be awake! His body felt so sore though that he knew trying to move would be a massive mistake, he groaned and squeezed his eyes more tightly. The voices silenced.

“Perhaps we should through some water on him.” One of the voices said.

Remus’s eyes shot open, “I’m up, I’m up!” He tried to move and felt a surge of pain on his back, he moved back onto the bed. Patton practically jumped on him to hug him. Pushing his back against the bed and making his pain rear up with a harsh burning sensation.

“Remus! You’re okay,” he moved out a tear from his eye, “Don’t ever worry us like that again.”

Roman was sitting off to the side playing with his fingers, “You’re still so hurt... Hey everyone, can I get a chance to talk to my brother for a second alone?” The group looked at each other and nodded in agreement.

“I think we all want a moment with him alone.” Deceit said quietly, standing up.

Wrath leaned towards Roman and whispered, “If you do anything to him, I will tear you apart.”

Roman smiled sheepishly, “Will do!”

And with that the group began to leave, Deceit was the last to leave, giving a final small look before leaving. Remus would bet money that he was standing directly behind the door just in case anything did go wrong during this discussion. Remus starred at Roman as he shuffled back and forth.

“Well?” Remus said slightly impatiently, there was nothing that he hated more than silence.

Roman took a deep breath, “I can’t help but blame myself for this, for you locking yourself in the imagination.” He rubbed his arms, “You’re not- a few months ago I thought you were the evilest thing a person could be, you’re loud, irritating, violent and vulgar.”

Remus grinned, “That’s the goal!”

Roman gave a small smile back and gently put his hand to his shoulder, “But you’re far from evil and you don’t deserve to be hurt for existing. And I’m sorry if I ever, ever contributed to you feeling like you do.”

Remus’s eyes widened at that, he didn’t expect the conversation to go this way. He couldn’t help but start to giggle. Oh God, Roman- heh- his laughter slowly became more and more harsh and jagged, his throat grew sore from the effort when he spat out, “23 years and 7 days!”

Roman blinked, “You counted?”

Remus’s grin widened, “Janus and I made a bet on the day that we met about whether you’d or Logan or Patton would ever see any value in us. It took this long but I WON! I WON! I WON!” He started to bounce and make loud screeching noises of victory.

Roman gave a small smile of relief, “Yes well...” He stood up, “I feel better, but the more important question is, do you?”

Remus moved his hand back and forth, physically time had already started to heal his wounds and mentally, well, he wasn't sure how he felt at this point. Studying his own mind was always an annoying at best use of time. He shrugged, "About as well as a mouse in a blender eating cheese."

Roman looked at the ceiling trying to figure out what that meant. There was a loud SPLAT as a piece of green goo (Whether it was jello or snot Remus couldn't know) hit Roman directly in the eye. Roman groaned at the attack and reached his hand towards it only to get his hand stuck, ah, it was the glue. Remus summoned a cup of fire; Roman held his hands up in fear.

"NO!" Roman cleared his throat and took a deep breath, "I'm good, I prefer keeping my eyebrows thank you." Remus shrugged and put the fire away while Roman shook his hand to try to separate it from his face.

He sighed, "I guess I'll just wait until I can get to my room to get it off." He gave one of his so-charming-and-kind-it-made-Remus-want-to-puke smiles, "Try to get some rest okay?" Remus sighed, did his brother have to be... Like this? All the time?

He waved his hand to dismiss him. "Don't worry too much about me Prince Smarming. I'll be fine."

Roman ruffled Remus's hair and started to walk towards the door, but Remus felt weird about the entire thing. Like someone took away your plate of organs before you could finish it; a slight sense of fullness but a lingering, intense hunger remained. That hunger is what lead him to loudly call to Roman.

"Roman, wait." Roman took his hand away from the doorknob and turned around to look at him. Remus's head started spinning, wait, fuck, what did he really want to say? Did he want to eat Roman?! Is that what that thing in his head that he was thinking was saying?! It wouldn't be the first time, especially during moments like this when everything felt intense, oh why would he stop Roman without even thinking about what he was supposed to say-

Then, as if from hell itself, a phrase floated towards him. One that perfectly described his current feelings towards Roman and his relationship to what just happened.

"Thank you."

------------------------------------

Wrath was poor at expressing emotions, which showed in what reaction he decided to show Remus. It was a short visit in which Remus didn’t get a word in edgewise. Instead Wrath marched over to his bed, his face showed his mild irritation of the situation, his eyes hard and narrow as two pieces of coal. He crawled on top of Remus’s bed and flicked his nose.

As soon as he’d came he’d gone. --------------------------------------------

Remus wasn’t sure how Deceit was going to react, after all, he’s the one who’d known about this entire endeavor after all, he was aware of it. Of every part of it, the good things that would happen, the bad and the neutral all the same. Yet he went along with it anyway, because it was what Remus wanted.

He pulled up a chair and ignored its screams as he sat on its face. He equally as easily ignored its weird moaning noises.“You know, Roman was ready to chop my head off the moment that he heard what was going on.” His voice had a hint of a chuckle in it.

Remus grinned, “Did he go through with it? Bet there was a TON of blood.”

Deceit rested his head in his hands, “Remus, we’re physical manifestations of Thomas’s being. We only have things like ‘blood’ if we want to or,” he gently stroked his scales, “It reflects Thomas’s view of us in some way... Of course there was a ton of blood.”

Remus gave a loud cackle and clapped his hands, "OH GOODIE! Can you give me a show?"

Deceit tapped his chin with his finger, “Hmm, I don’t know,” he gave Remus a knowing look with that small smile on his lips.

Remus had to stop himself from bouncing, “You’re great at remaking events!”

Deceit grinned and tipped his hat so it covered the snake half of his face, “If you insist.” He gave a twirl, his caplet flowing around him as he changed into Roman. Remus snuggled into his blanket and watched the show take place.

“Why can’t I get into the Imagination?” Deceit as Roman shouted, he spun around again so he was himself, facing Roman.

He pressed his hand against his heart, “Why would I have anything to do with this?”

‘Roman’ growled at Deceit, his hand on his sword’s hilt,“Drop the act Corrupt Cobra, I know you’re far from innocent. I could feel your slimy yellow aura all over my door!”

Deceit gave a long, sigh and rolled his eyes dramatically. He pointed where Roman was standing with his thumb and stage whispered to Remus, “This guy, am I right?” He turned back to ‘Roman’ before he could give a proper answer, “Fine fine, if you truly insist on knowing, your brother asked me to do him a little favor.”

‘Roman’ glared at Deceit, “What did you do,”

Deceit cocked his head, “What?”

‘Roman’ pointed his sword where Deceit’s throat was, “The only wishes you’d grant are those monkey paw... Evil kind, what. Did you do. To Remus?”

Deceit’s eyes shifted, “You’re a smart man Roman, I’m sure you can figure it out.”

There was a silence between them.

“Let me through.”

“No.”

‘Roman’ pulled his sword back, “Let me through or I will not hesitate to separate your head from your neck.”

Deceit shook his head, “I will not let you stop Remus from getting what he wanted for the sake of your own sense of feeling morally right.” He held his hair.

‘Roman’ true to his word swung his sword, Deceit turned back to his self so he could show how the muscles of the neck were separated, the blood pushed through his veins each droplet flying through the room like a water sprinkler on a garden.

Remus squealed and opened his mouth to taste the take droplet, Deceit’s head winked at him but in the few seconds where he was still reacting to ‘Roman’s’ bold action, Roman ran past him through the door.

Deceit summoned his hat and bowed while Remus cheered his dramatic display.

“Brava brava!” He shouted and gave a loud laugh, but as Deceit moved back to sit back down, a silence fell upon the pair.

“So... That’s it then?” Remus asked, “You’re not going to scold me or tell me that what I did could have gotten me killed, you know the whole riot act that you gave Virgil when he did something that could have fucked him up?”

Deceit looked down and took a deep breath, in and out through his nose. He than looked back up at Remus, “Remus, I- we grew up together. You and Virgil were all that I had for years and after Virgil left you were the only one that I had left. And,” Another deep breath, “As much as a mistake as some may argue it is... I have some respect for what you are and what you do... What I told Virgil disrespected him and that’s why he hates me now. I didn’t respect his ability to chose who he was and what he wanted to do.”

Deceit stood up, “And I will not make the same mistake again. Remus you’re an adult and I’m your friend. I-I trust you to make your own decisions and know what you want to do for yourself and Thomas.”

Remus’s eyes slowly widened further and further as Deceit continued speaking, “Dee- I don’t know what I want! Not really, I think, I’m REALLY bad at making decisions, I’m reckless and I have no filter and-”

Deceit put his hand on Remus’s head, giving it a gentle ruffle, “You’ll figure it out.” He moved his hand away, “You’re the only one who can... Let’s just hope that it doesn’t involve too many mess ups.”

Remus wrapped his arms around himself, “We can hope but it’s me! I’m chaos and pain personified.”

Deceit hesitated and stood up straight, “You’re a lot of things Remus. Those are only two of them but I can’t tell you what else there is to you.” And with that, Deceit walked out of the room. Each click, click, click of his heels a roll of thunder through Remus’s mind. No matter who came after, he knew now that Deceit wasn’t going to pull him out of this and that-that frightened him more than anything the Imagination could give him.

#What you are chapter 5

[sparrow-flies-south]

Remus’s Guide To Mending Friendships (For Fun And Profit) [2/?]

Fandom: Sanders Sides Rating: Teen Pairings: Deceit & Virgil, Deceit & Virgil & Remus, Remus & Roman Warnings: Disturbing imagery (it’s Remus’s POV), imagined character death, kidnapping Summary: When he realises that Deceit misses Virgil, Remus decides that the best way to cheer him up is to persuade Virgil to come back to the dark side. Too bad Virgil hasn’t wanted anything to do with them since he left.

Part One  Part Three  Part Four  AO3

Step Two: Invite Them To Spend Time With You

Remus popped into Virgil’s room near midnight.

Before, Virgil’s room had been one of Remus’ favourite places; the sense of dread really got his blood pumping, and it helped give him so many wonderful ideas. It hadn’t changed much since then, it was still dark and covered with cobwebs, but one of the walls was painted purple now, and Virgil had stuck glow in the dark stars on the ceiling.

Virgil himself hadn’t noticed Remus yet; he was still sat on his bed, looking at his laptop with his head phones on. His fingers tapped against his bed sheets along to the music he was listening to. Remus had never seen him look so relaxed.

Usually, this kind of scene would make Remus want to throw something, or smash something, or just start screaming so that there would be something happening. Now, though, Remus felt oddly transfixed watching Virgil.

Then Virgil looked up, saw Remus, screamed, and threw his laptop.

Remus dodged the laptop, and it shattered on the ground behind him. “Is that how you greet people now?” he asked. “Should I throw something back?”  

As he spoke, Virgil shot off his bed so that he was standing on the other side of it to Remus. He glared. “What the hell do you want?”

It was a relief to see that Virgil was still acting normal.

“I just want to talk!” Remus said brightly. “You know, catch up. It’s been forever!”

Virgil stared. “We saw each other last week.”

Remus frowned. “That’s what I said.”

Virgil crossed his arms over his chest. “We have nothing to talk about,” he said coldly.

“Aw, don’t be like that,” Remus said. “What about old times?”

That, it turned out, was the wrong thing to say.

“Old times?” Virgil snapped. “You mean how you terrorised me for years? Or how you kicked me out for finding people who cared about me? Or, hey, how about when you made me tell Thomas about how I used to be one of you?”

Remus stared at Virgil. His chest suddenly felt tight, like a tentacle was wrapping around it, threatening to crush him until he asphyxiated.  He wanted to say something, to protest that he hadn’t terrorised Virgil; that they didn’t kick him out, they’d just given Virgil a choice and Virgil had chosen to leave.

But Remus couldn’t seem to do anything. It was as if Virgil was a gorgon and Remus was turned to stone.

Virgil was still glaring. “Well? What exactly do you want us to talk about?”

“Come back,” Remus blurted.

Virgil faltered. “What?”

“Come back,” Remus repeated. “Come live with me and Dee again. He misses you.”

Virgil shook his head. He seemed to be having trouble processing what Remus had said, which was a fairly normal reaction to Remus, come to think of it.

“Deceit doesn’t miss me,” he said at last. “He just misses having someone to control.”

“That’s not true,” Remus protested.

Virgil glared. “Deceit never cared about me. Neither of you did.” He seemed to be growing more sure of himself now. “The light sides- they care about me. They help me. I don’t need you anymore.”

Remus frowned. He took a step forward, and Virgil took a step back.

“I’m not going back,” Virgil snarled.

Remus halted. Virgil’s breathing had turned heavy and fast, and he was glaring at Remus. Remus swallowed. Then, he fixed a smile on to his face.

“Fine!” he said. “Not like you’re any fun now, anyway.”

He didn’t quite leave Virgil’s room fast enough to miss the look of relief on Virgil’s face.

Back in his own room, Remus sank to the floor. That had gone terrible. Like a train wreck, except train wrecks were fun, with lots of fire and smoke and dead bodies. So not so much like a train wreck then.

Maybe he should just leave Virgil alone to his perfect life with his perfect friends. But, no, Remus had decided he was going to get Virgil back, and Remus didn’t give up when he’d decided something. That would just be admitting that his idea was unrealistic.

If Virgil didn’t want to remember how good things had been with them, then Remus would just have to find a way to make him remember.

 ***

Which was how Remus ended up in the light sides’ living room with duct tape, a bundle of rope, and a fool proof plan.

The sides – all four of them - were in the kitchen, which meant all Remus had to do was wait until Virgil and then follow him out and surprise him.

It wouldn’t be long. Virgil always left group activities first.

Laughter and voices drifted from the kitchen, his brother’s voice carrying above the rest, though Remus couldn’t hear what he was saying. They were doing something together – baking maybe? Whatever. Remus didn’t care.

Time passed. Virgil didn’t come out when Remus expected him to. That was strange. Virgil was always anxious and ready to leave when around other people, but Remus could hear his quiet laughter.

As he waited, Remus let his imagination wander. What would happen if he walked into the kitchen? The others would probably yell at him, and try to make him leave. It’d be fun enough in the moment, sure, but he’d get bored fast. What about if he grabbed one of the knives and started stabbing someone – not Roman, he’d just fight back. Not Virgil, either, he’d probably see it coming. Logan or Patton then. Stabbing Logan would be satisfying, except it probably wouldn’t have much of an effect. Nothing he tried to do to Logan would.

Maybe it would have an effect on Patton – Patton did get very upset about all of Remus’s ideas. Maybe Remus would be able to make Patton bleed. Maybe Patton would die. Now that would be interesting.

Roman would probably cry – he was dramatic like that. Yeah, Roman would cry and hold Patton to his chest and swear revenge against Remus. Then he’d probably run Remus through with his sword, and wouldn’t even have to feel guilty about it later.

Logan – Logan was harder to predict. He kept going on about not feeling things, so Remus wasn’t sure if he’d cry. He’d probably help Roman get revenge, though.

Virgil would definitely cry. And get revenge – maybe he’d even get there before Roman did, and kill Remus while Roman was still holding Patton.

Virgil would hate him, and never want to see him again.

Which wasn’t that different from now, actually.

Thinking about that wasn’t so fun anymore.

Logan left the kitchen then, and Remus had to scramble to hide behind the television in time. Okay, so maybe he should have been paying more attention to his surroundings.

For a moment, Remus panicked – had Virgil already left? He had to get to Virgil before he reached his room, otherwise Virgil would be too powerful. But no, he could definitely hear Virgil’s voice from back in the kitchen.

Logan didn’t linger in the living room, instead crossing straight through it without bothering to look to closely, and heading upstairs. A few moments later, Patton and Roman followed him.

Which made Virgil the last one to leave.

Well, that worked in Remus’ favour. He summoned his tentacles and moved into the kitchen.

Virgil hadn’t seen him; he was looking in the opposite direction, a small smile on his face.

Remus darted out a tentacle and wrapped it around Virgil. Virgil cried out and started struggling, but Remus just pulled Virgil to him. Virgil’s eyes widened when he saw Remus.

“Ro-“ Virgil began to shout, but Remus quickly slapped another tentacle over Virgil’s mouth, muffling his cries.

Remus pushed Virgil to the ground and quickly tied his hands and feet, then tied his arms to his sides, so that he couldn’t flail them around. Virgil glared up at him, still trying to speak around the tentacle.

“Aw, don’t be like that, Virgie,” Remus said, and patted him on the cheek.

Virgil somehow managed to glare harder.

With a shrug, Remus transported them both back to the dark side, and only once they were both there did he remove the tentacle from Virgil’s mouth, letting it disappear with the others he’d conjured.

“What the fuck,” Virgil spat as soon as he was able. He pushed himself back, away from Remus, until his back hit the sofa.

Remus looked around to see where Deceit was, but he must have been in his room. Virgil struggled against his bonds.

“Let me go,” Virgil was snarling. “The others are going to notice I’m gone- they’ll come looking.”

“Dee!” Remus called, ignoring Virgil. “I have a present for you.”

In the corner of his eye, Virgil stopped struggling and fell silent.

Upstairs, a door closed, and footsteps sounded towards the stairs.

“I truly hope it’s another body part,” Deceit called, a mix of amused and exasperated.

Remus glanced contemplatively at Virgil, who had drawn his legs up close to his chest, eyes wide and fixed on the staircase. “I mean, technically it contains body parts.”

Deceit descended halfway down the stairs then froze, eyes fixed on Virgil.

“Remus,” he said calmly. “What is Virgil doing here?”

Remus grinned and threw his arms out wide. “Surprise! I got you Virgil.”

“I can see that,” Deceit said, walking slowly to the bottom of the stairs. “Why have you decided to kidnap Virgil?”

“Because you miss him.” Really, shouldn’t it be obvious? Deceit was supposed to be the smart one. “And when I asked him to come back he said no. But then I figured we could just keep him locked up one of the spare rooms. It’ll be just like old times!”

“Fuck that,” Virgil spat, struggling again. “You are not keeping me here.”

Deceit glanced at Remus. “I certainly have the same memories of old times as you do,” he said, then shifted his focus to Virgil. “Are you hurt?”

Virgil went still. He gaped at Deceit. “What?”

“Are you hurt?” he repeated. “Remus can certainly be… gentle without meaning to.”

“Hey!” Remus protested, more at the gentle thing than at what Deceit actually meant.

Virgil was silent for a long time, watching Deceit in confusion, while Deceit watched him back, expression unreadable.

“No,” Virgil muttered at last, looking away.

“Well then,” Deceit said, and strode towards Virgil.

Virgil pushed himself into the sofa as much as he could, hissing. “Don’t touch me.”

Deceit stopped in front of Virgil and crouched down, so that they were eye to eye. “I am about to commit some nefarious action, of course,” he said. “You should definitely be afraid.”

Virgil eyed Deceit warily but didn’t move.

Deceit summoned two extra pairs of hands. One pair reached round to untie his hands, another his feet, and the final pair untied the rope wrapped around his arms and torso. Once they were done, Deceit withdrew, standing up and taking a few steps back.

Virgil watched Deceit suspiciously, rubbing at his wrists.

Remus gaped. “What are you doing? He’s going to escape.”

“Really?” Deceit said. “I hadn’t thought about that. Thank god you are here, Remus, or I don’t know what I would do.” He sounded pissed.

“You’re the one who wanted Virgil back,” Remus protested.

Deceit glanced at Virgil, who looked as confused as Remus. His jaw twitched. “Not like this,” he said, quietly, and then looked at Remus and continued, in his normal tone. “We don’t have the time for one of us to constantly guard him. And if we leave him unsupervised, you know he’ll escape.”

Virgil smirked.

“And do you really want to face the light sides?” Deceit asked. “Or give them more ammunition to use to turn against Thomas.”

“But-“

Virgil stood up, and Remus fell silent. His eyes darted between Remus and Deceit. He opened his mouth as if he was going to say something, but then he just closed it and disappeared.

Remus turned his attention back to Deceit, who was still looking at the spot where Virgil had stood, jaw tight.

“You were lying,” Remus realised.

Deceit jumped slightly, as if he’d forgotten Remus was there. “I’m always lying,” he said. “Do you disagree with what I said?”

Remus shrugged. “You’re smart enough to figure out a way to get around all that. If you wanted to keep him, you would have.”

“Trying to keep him didn’t work last time,” Deceit said. “And you should leave him alone.”

Remus scowled. “But you’re upset. Why would you do something that makes you upset?”

Deceit shook his head. “Despite what your brother likes to think, not everything has a happy ending. Why fight for something that is never going to happen?”

Remus wanted to keep arguing with him, but the look Deceit sent told him not to. Instead, he did nothing as Deceit left the room in silence.

Well, he thought, standing alone in the living room.This is going to be harder than I thought.

#sanders sides #remus sanders #sympathetic remus #virgil sanders #deceit sanders #sympathetic deceit #my fic #janus #remus #virgil #remus's guide