#but she comes out the other side

[ryssbelle]

Poppy for N2 au, it took me so long to make her design cuz I didn't really know what I wanted to do only because I feel like her design is pretty perfect.

But then I just thought about fun outfits to give her or outfits that I would find comfortable if I was wearing them and it all came together.

Poppy here is pretty much the same as here movie counterpart, as nothing really changes on her end of things other than having more insight on Branch through his brothers, and through Lief. Shes also a bit more understanding a bit earlier on because of it but it doesnt do much to change her own character arc I would say.

Bonus

Part of Poppys design was based off a design I had made for previous rulers of Troll Village/Tree

Namely Queen Protea who I designed as Poppys grandmother

Named after the Protea flower which part of her design is based off :D

In the context of this Au Protea was the one who conceptualized the tunnels while her son, King Peppy, was the one to follow through after her death

#my art #dreamworks trolls #trolls #trolls 3 #trolls au #trolls band together #trolls branch #trolls poppy #trolls oc #trolls oc lief #trolls oc protea #its really hard to mess with poppy at least in the context of this au cuz like i said nothing really changes on her end #whats changed in this au was just stuff on Branchs side of things #Poppy can witness these things but she herself isnt really changed by them #she of course would have more insight on Branchs life through his brothers and the addition of Lief as a character #but idk if that would fully change her approach with him other than what ive displayed #where shed try to relate to branch rather than trying to force him to relate to her #which would then most likely make her more understanding going forward than she was in canon #im still figuring her out #also since im in the tags and nobody really reads this #i feel brave enough to say #that secretly #ive been kind of sort of #posting a fanfic of this au under the name not the only one #on ao3 #and thats where Protea comes from #its not well written in the slightest #but its just for fun and practice so in my mind it doesnt really have to be entirely #but i am having fun with it #so if you see this and check it out please be so very nice to me please

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

Frank! fantasy flavor!

rambles:

i really wanted to blend that monk-class inspiration w/ Frank's personal vibe... i like to think that i Succeeded!

i turned his tie into a sort of brooch since, yk. bowties aren't all that Fantastical. they miss the style. also i think they'd be more comfortable with something smaller since he's very active and needs a wide range of maneuverability

i bet Eddie or someone wheedled them into adding the leather shoulder pauldrons - leather to keep it a bit more flexy, and also. it just looks Cool!

figuring out what would replace his vest was tough. i didn't want them to be entirely unprotected, but i couldn't give him straight armor. though i will admit! a sort of tight-fitting crop top was Considered! but i landed on a gambeson vest as the best fit - comfortable, flexible, a Vest, while providing some level of protection! also, gambesons are quilted, which fits Frank's diamond-checkered vest!

ive already mentioned that one of my favorite outfit things is Flowy Pants Tucked Into Boots, so... that choice wasn't very character driven. except the boots are a tall ankle wrap - for that extra stability and strength! their shoes are pretty flexible and are only a few steps away from being slippers.

and the half-skirt - open skirt? - thing (still don't know what its called) is purely some self indulgence. i think Frank looks great in skirts!! also imagining him Throwing Down w/ the added flair of the skirt... damn. it'd probably help confuse enemies too - what're they gonna do next? who knows! the skirt is in the way and adding extra Movement!

i like to think that his knife is either in a sheath attached to the back of the belt, or they have it on their thigh (under the skirt) like Wally's bag. he probably never uses it... punching is the way to go for Frank methinks. it's probably reserved for cutting ropes and fruit

speaking of punching.... wrist wraps! inspired by boxing gauze! pads his knuckles, keeps his wrist compressed, its the best choice for physical combat. though the wrapped knuckles probably always have blood showing through anyway... or no yeah it's mostly other people's blood...

as for scars - Frank probably has quite the collection! i imagine that they've been picking fights since a young age, and in such a dangerous world he probably got hit a Lot until they learned how to hit back. and hit back Well. still, i wanted to give him a cool face scar with a very lame backstory - a book with a crisp, sharp spine corner fell off a high shelf and bonked them in the face at juuuust the right angle <3 he probably stays very fucking quiet about it which makes everyone think there's some intense traumatic backstory behind it. there isn't. Frank's just embarrassed.

closing note: i imagine that Frank has zero magic. literally none. cannot wield it for shit cannot utilize it. he's just like Howdy fr

#im Very happy with this outfit ngl #they probably know a bunch of different fighting styles... #and then stitches them all together into a Frankenstyle #get it? frankenstein's monster + frank + style - yeah yeah i know im hilarious #he probably stresses everyone tf out with how gung-ho they are in a fight Without Much Protection #like yeah gambesons can cushion blows and depending on the quality can lessen or even stop arrows / stabs #but frank's is a Vest. yeah it covers his vital organ area but like. their face? arms? legs? its free target practice #everytime eddie sees frank throw himself at an enemy w/ magic or Much Bigger Than Frank #he has about 100 heart attacks #catch him sprinting to cover's franks ass. they need it #frank Will look at someone way above his pay grade and go 'yeah i can take em' #(and that's why they consistently end up under poppy's healing wing) #julie unfortunately is on the same bullshit as frank #so if frank takes on someone he cant handle - so will she. without blinking! #though when she (or anyone else) tries it that's when frank goes 'are you crazy?! dont fight them they'll kill you' #frank has common sense when it comes to other people <3 not themself <3 #scribble salad #wh fantasy au #ah yes and the tiny knife... the glorified cheese knife... #even sally has a nice dagger and she's got some Powerful magic on her side #meanwhile frank is bringing fists to a gunfight smh #tryin ta think of a backstory for him for this au... #im thinking... he was either an orphan or his parents straight up Ditched him as a kid... #and he was taken in by a... fuck im missing the word. monastery? or something? #whatever it was it was run by somewhat spiritual people that raised & trained highly skilled/disciplined fighters #with the intent of 'you will fight for good blah blah blah' #maybe frank would sneak out and thats how he met julie? and he taught her some combat skills maybe... #& then he wound up running away w/ her or somethn #or he completed his training and went out to be a Soldier For Good but wound up following his own path & moral compass... idk

[dungeons-and-dragon-age]

Hiii everyone, say, how do your Hawkes go go about sharing their estate? If they do it at all? Is everyone free to come and go or are they more private? Or do they only invite their LI to stay? I'm curious!! :)

#lay rambles #my ocs #oc: liam hawke #oc: lilian hawke #both my hawkes are very social w their friends but i love comparing their boundaries around it #theres variation in rules for specific ppl with both of them ofc but theres still general differences #with liam its all very open and everyone can p much come and go whenever #they dont get extra keys (theyll get lost and he doesnt want randos finding them lol) but they know where to find the spare key #and bodhan and sandal and orana know to let them in whenever #hes very lenient in this this regard but he does have rules abt what he does and doesnt want them to do #mostly its about not making too much of a mess lol bc liam prefers to clean himself #(he doesnt trust the crew with his household and also he has particular ways of doing things and Hates when theyre done differently) #so things like keep your dirty garb at the entrance dont cook by yourselves (this was banned after they did it one (1) time lol) etc #also no fucking allowed. do that somewhere else for the love of the maker he does NOT want to walk into that in his own house #(and it also comes back to liam not trusting them with cleaning but also Not wanting to clean that up lol) #also he is not fond of them going into his room uninvited. most of the house is chill but that is *his* space #he accommodates these rules by e.g. having spare slippers and a little washing basin in the entrance hall for dirty shoes/feet #always makes sure to have snacks in stock that he knows they like #food will have notes abt what to leave for leandra/orana/etc but otherwise food is prepared with his friends in mind #and in general he'll make sure to adjust the space/routine in little ways to accommodate them #(air out when fen isnt there cus he doesnt like drafts; keep curtains open cus anders prefers open spaces; etc) #lilian on the other hand doesnt like when her friends come into the estate without a heads up (cept for emergencies) #but once they have her 'ok' its basically mi casa es su casa #dont yknow. overdo it and get too rowdy but otherwise do whatever #however. she also expects everyone to clean up after themselves. she aint here to play maid and youre all adults #also liam has a general 'please try to not be too wild when leandra is here' and lilian doesnt #not cos she doesnt care but cos leandra is bothered by sth she can speak up herself #oh and lilian uses the basement space as temporary refuge for anyone who needs it (mostly escaped mages) #also side note: both offered gamlen to stay but he refused (out of pride/remorse) #...this got long and i ran out of tag space lmfao so this is it for now xD

[storm-of-feathers]

I would call that a suicide tbh. I don't think what Penny (or Pyrrha, or Yang, or Hazel,) did counts, since it wasn't "I want to die" and more "I have to die for people to win.".

Ruby wanted to die. Huge difference. As far as she and the other characters know, she pretty blatantly just committed suicide. After being tortured and told over and over and over that the world is better off without her.

Fuck, man. Of all the characters they could have had for a scene like that, Ruby is by far the most gut wrenching.

#rwby #rwby spoilers #rwby volume 9 #rwby volume 9 spoilers #now. obviously i dont think shes actually dead or gonna lose memories or anything like that #idk what i do think is going to happen #but a reset on her character wouldnt really make narrative sense. imo. so i think shes gonna go through the tree #probably see summer and all that #and then come out the other side as her #with the understanding she'll never be the same girl again. and that she HAS to move forward.

[drenched-in-sunlight]

i like ghostflower (hell I draw fanarts for them) but I’ve decided I like the version of them in my head more and will just stay away from the fandom in general cuz I’ve seen some discussion and they just make me go “what on earth are y’all on” 💀💀💀💀

#“miles will immediately forgive gwen when he sees she’s gathered a whole team to save him WHAT #he’ll save himself first then befriend Miles G. and Miles G. will start hissing like the cats when that team comes and Miles looks upset #like I firmly believe miles will only talk to Hobie and Margo after all that cuz they r the two that stand by his side thru whole that #like that take is so insane when Hobie is the reason Miles can run away in the first place and Margo risks everything to allow Miles leaving #AND HE KNOWS #u don’t even need a scale to see who Miles will associate with safety and protection more after atsv #also “miles keep getting up after he’s beaten down cuz that what Gwen told him to do in itsv is ALSO insane cuz WHAT #the thing she said when she and others were berating and crowding Miles for not knowing how to be Spider-Man just FEW DAYS after he’s bitten #?????? #THAT THING???? #not his mom’s words or his uncle’s or idk THAT’S HOW HE IS??? #*walk in the tag* *walk out immediately* #u don’t have to make them the only person in each other’s life to prop the ship up especially in this case cuz it makes no sense 😭 #actually the first point srl piss me off cuz that team was only possible in the first place cuz of Hobie and Margo and Miles laying #the groundwork by just being a sweetheart he is #charming and inspiring ppl so ofc these kids will rally behind him and team up to save him #ykno LIKE IN THE COMIC TOO??? #ppl just have to take the only thing I don’t like in the movie (miles suddenly obsessed over Gwen when they didn’t even interact that much #in itsv) and magnify it x100 in fandom #if she ain’t a gremlin girl that is trying her best to regain Miles’ trust but it’s a slow process and Miles needs space and time first then #I don’t want it

[aroaessidhe]

2024 reads / storygraph

A Tempest of Tea

first in a YA fantasy duology

follows a young immigrant woman in a fantasy Victorian city who runs a tearoom that doubles as an illegal bloodhouse for vampires at night

when their business is threatened, she gets a chance to save it by teaming up with her best friend, a rich girl with a talent for forgery, a vampire artist, and a mysterious city guard to do a heist to infiltrate high society and collect a logbook that may reveal the extent of the corruption in the city

fantasy city with a masked ruler, arthurian elements, themes of colonialism

#a tempest of tea #aroaessidhe 2024 reads #This has a really cool concept and worldbuilding and some fantastic characters! #I like the discussion of immigration and colonialism (I appreciate a story in this niche that’s not so white) #I like arthie and jin’s relationship and Arthie is a great character. #It definitely feels like the first half of a story - like is the arthurian stuff gonna come up more or is it just... #the mc is called arthie and has a gun she pulled out of a stone. Is there more to that lmao. it does end on a cliffhanger too. #The main thing I *didn't* like is that the middle kinda turns into…miscellaneous events purely to facilitate the characters being attracted #to each other. good for them I guess but i don’t care. #(I probably should have expected that based on the author’s other duology so that's on me I guess) #(the romances also feel on the older side of YA) #I also found that the audioboook narrator paused slightly too long between sentences. #I love having author interviews at the end of audiobooks! #which also directly called me out for guessing the obvious twist but not the multiple others directly after #(granted the obvious one I was like... genuinely confused whether it was supposed to be a twist bc I thought we already knew that) #also what's up with the coconut. lol. why that specifically

[cuubism]

hello friends. despite my 9 million existing dreamling wips i'm feeling the need to branch out a bit for the sake of my mental variety. what pairing other than dreamling should i write a little something for? could be romantic or platonic

other way of phrasing i guess: any pairings you really want to see more fics for in the fandom?

#i actually do have one someone asked me for ages ago i've been meaning to get to so i'll try to do that too #bonus points if it still involves dream bc you know i love dream XD #probably wont do any romantic pairings /between/ the endless because well yeah #but open to exploring pretty much anything else... feel free to send whatever if you want. dont worry about if i'll like it #if i can't vibe with it or find it uncomfy i just won't write it no harm no foul #not me soliciting little prompts fully knowing that motivation is a fickle beast and who knows if i would get to writing them XD i want #to though! or like. idk. if anyone wants to share headcanons about their favorite pairings i am happy to receive them #the sandman #a couple that are bouncing around my head already: #rose meeting desire. this could be really interesting i think (they are of course her grandparent) #calliope and lucienne post-calliope's imprisonment: i think their dynamic could be interesting since they both have/had close relationships #with dream. but of course calliope's relationship with him fell apart. i think lucienne with whatever context of it she had would probably #be sympathetic to calliope's perspective but still staunchly On Dream's Side so the speak bc she is ultimately very loyal to him... could b #an interesting convo. #additionally - calliope and johanna. both suffered things recently. both had curious interactions with dream where they recently saw both #his vicious side AND a kinder more understanding side of him... [dream gave rachel a peaceful death at johanna's request etc] #but they've come out of their suffering really differently (granted it was different types of suffering. but) #wow here i am asking for people's ideas and then just coming up with my own XD #anyway #wait two others: i'm fascinated by the potential dynamic of lucienne and the corinthian they only had like one short scene together in the #show but can you imagine. spending eons being loyal to dream and then going opposite directions with that loyalty. being among dream's inne #circle so to speak except lucienne is her own entity while corinthian was /created/ by dream. they have the most fascinating venn diagram o #personality traits and narrative positions... #secondly. and this is kind of crack. but like. imagine johanna and corinthian in the same room XD 'hi i'm an exorcist and this is my pet #serial killer' 'yeah my lord gave me a vacation to go kill some demons' why doesn't he try to kill johanna? bc she tried to destroy him #first time they met and he can't help but respect it XD

[fromtheseventhhell]

Arya watched them die and did nothing. What good did it do you to be brave? One of the women picked for questioning had tried to be brave, but she had died screaming like all the rest. There were no brave people on that march, only scared and hungry ones. (Arya VI, ACOK)

--

The night she was caught, the Lannister men had been nameless strangers with faces as alike as their nasal helms, but she'd come to know them all. You had to know who was lazy and who was cruel, who was smart and who was stupid. You had to learn that even though the one they called Shitmouth had the foulest tongue she'd ever heard, he'd give you an extra piece of bread if you asked, while jolly old Chiswyck and soft-spoken Raff would just give you the back of their hand. (Arya VI, ACOK)

Arya: *restrains herself from acting out when captured by the Mountain and his men because she knows fighting back/being brave wouldn't accomplish anything*

Arya: *takes note of the temperments of several Lannister guards so that she can learn how to navigate around their behavior*

Fandom: Arya is a feral idiot with no self-control uwu 🤗

#arya stark #asoiaf #a song of ice and fire #this is really just a small portion of her intelligence and self-control and yet...people can't stand the idea of Arya being more than #the brawn to somebody's brains. They literally can't handle her being her own character or not comparing her to somebody else #mind you this is all on top of how calculated she us when helping with the coup and planning her escape from harrenhal #none of these takes are even judging her based on the books it's all about her in comparison to [x] character...usually Sansa #Ned's /Sun and Moon/ quote has had a terrible impact on this fandom and their perception of the Stark sisters #Arya HAS to be the /wild + reckless/ counterpart to Sansa's cool + collected/ side lol and it's such a joke #even if you thought Arya was reckless for defending Mycah which is debatable she's gone through so much since then #and she would've been dead several times over if she was really as rash and impulsive as fandom wanted her to be #why people can't comprehend both sisters sharing qualities I don't know but it's hilarious considering this fandom's #/don't pit the Stark sisters against each other/ attitude...guess that only counts when it comes to propping up Sansa #at what point can we start calling this out for the misogyny it is? #fandom nonsense

[crimescrimson]

Ada Wong & Leon S. Kennedy: The History [ Resident Evil 4 (2023) ]

#crimson's gifs: resident evil #Resident Evil #RE #Resident Evil 4 #RE4 #Resident Evil 4 Remake #RE4R #RE4MAKE #Ada Wong #Leon S Kennedy #Leon S. Kennedy #Leon Kennedy #Leon Scott Kennedy #Aeon #AdaLeon #LeonAda #Leon x Ada #Ada Wong x Leon S. Kennedy #Pairing: Keeping Score #im ngl to you please look at all the other Aeon footage ive previously edited in its full on youtube #from the 1998 og to fucking re2 remake and tell me you don't see how out of character their interactions in 4r are #Because I swear to god ive been working with their entire history of footage for this series for the past couple DAYS and its just mental #I ranted about Leon last set but its also Ada whos undergone a crazy fucking out of character streak too #Calling Leon a dog and shit is NOT how shes treated him at ALL in any other instance #Like in the og again shes outwardly caring and concerned for him in SW and the base game. She does NOT talk about him like that #Even in their later interactions like re6 shes still outwardly worried for him #The only piece of media that comes even close to that type of characterisation would probs be Damnation and even then #The whole movie segments with them is just dark flirting while on the job and theyre both in kinda bad moods so in there it makes sense mor #In RE4 its a reuniting after 6 years on BOTH sides. I loved Ada's new seperate ways and the bond she had with Luis but they massacred #How she and Leon treated each other and it makes me mad

[ride-a-dromedary]

I couldn't tell you why, but something about Halsin taking the time to write "My Dear Nettie" and reminding her to take care of the animals and not to feed anymore fish to Tuffet the bear really gets to me - the note is literally rushed and scribbled, but he still took the time to be kind.

#BG3 Musing #Halsin Posting #and this goes along with the halsin communicates deliberately we were talking about #i've figured it out - so many of the other druids are snippy with Halsin not because of shadow druid nonsense #but because he has obvious favourites duh #jk jk but it's very obvious there is a special connection between him and his apprentice and she greatly admires him #but also as a side that note that says KEEP AWAY FROM TUFFET she's lazy enough as is - you KNOW Halsin also scribbled that out #like a naughty cat note taped to a fridge to remind everyone to PLEASE STOP FEEDING HER SHE'S ON A DIET #also that bear who is just SO sad that halsin didn't come back with the rest of them

[sysig]

For Requestober: Would you please draw some platonic/ambiguous fluff of Commander Peepers with Wander and/or Silvia? ^^

I love the grumpy little guy, he deserves all the love in the world <3

Day 4 - Don't tempt me

#My art #Requestober #Wander Over Yonder #Commander Peepers #Sylvia #Who's the caption belong to? :3c #It is nigh impossible for me to make digital grayscale WOY art lol #They just belong in poppy cartoon colours! It's the most correct! #It's also amazing how fast I fall out of practice lol - Peepers fared alright but I did have a few edits lol #And I've never been 100% confident with Sylvia but she is fun to draw! #You just know he's overworking himself - as usual - and Wander is elsewhere so Syl needs a nap partner lol #Kill two birds with one stone! #And I mean if he needs an excuse she could always give him a reason to need to rest up lol #It'd tire her out too! Sparring to exhaustion haha #Wander just comes back to the two of them passed out flopped over each other and covers them with a blanket lol #Better yet sets up right nearby and naps all together! Haha #Their fluff is always on the rough and tumble side haha ♪ Even if/when they're sweet to each other there's always Something #That's just their dynamic :) It suits them hehe

[lolotr]

Okay but it will give me life if Imogen gets to say "I'm bi actually" in the next season and them have nick give her the biggest hug and then they're bi4bi bffs forever and ever and

#heartstopper #heartstopper spoilers #I adore this girl #And I actually don't care if she ends up queer or just does some questioning and determines she's straight #Bc that's also an experience #Being surrounded by queer people will make you do some healthy questioning of your assumed heteronormativity even of yourself #If you come out the other side of that straight it's still important work #BUT #I've been saying since s1 I wouldn't be surprised if she is queer and I would ADORE that too #And her and nick being the best of friends gives me life #I saw someone post that they wanted her to end up alone and happy at the end of s3 and I kind of adore that #Like she figures herself out not through a relationship but through having supportive friends #And then choosing to be alone #God this show is everything

[hollyhomburg]

Y E S i live for sad bily facts

Okay so! Hiding them in the tags cuz I’m on mobile enter at your own risk

#seriously If you don’t want spoilers or to be apart of the angst dont click!!!!! #first off: jungkook dies first #a seizure takes him out at 55-60 and it’s partially namjoon’s fault #namjoon doesn’t catch him before he hits his head and he goes through a period of depression after and eventually comes to the conclusion #that jungkook would have forgiven him and he would have #the kids take it the worst especially their youngest who ends up sleeping between the mc and tae for a full year #as for the next angsty tidbit- yoongi dies before the m/c #and she’s actually really really happy because he never got to know what a dead mating mark feels like like she’s actually very thankful #tae and the m/c and hobi are the last ones alive and they leave the house to their kids and retire to a smaller seaside cottage #hobi only gets to live in it for a few weeks before he passes at like 80 #the mc and tae live for a few more years after that both of them with their dead mating marks on the sides of their necks #the spend most of their time with their grand pups of which there are 8 of one of which looks so much like namjoon that #tae in her haze of dimentia actually talks to him like he is namjoon #tae and the m/c pass hours from each other though like #maybe less than 3 hours #and live until they’re 91 years old

[revelisms]

Braindumping about Silco and Vi, because these two are such fantastic narrative foils for each other—and, in the same breath, completely cut from the same cloth.

I keep wishing they had more scenes together, another square-off, something to put them head-to-head—because there's so much potential for them to counteract the layers of each other.

At the root of it all, Vander's looming between them, this monolith of a presence that ties their pasts together. But above that, still, we have Jinx—who not only is their driving tension, but their greatest possibility for reconnection.

Here, we have Vander's daughter—someone who, for all intents and purposes, has become what he wanted, but who has also been someone he saw too much of himself in; who he did his best to reshape, instead of enable, and who put him on a pedestal, and truly saw him as hers, more than perhaps anyone (except, well, Silco).

Vi treasured Vander, fully looked up to him as her father—and losing him shattered her. In between all the layers of it, there's this underlying thread in his actions towards her, a tension that just sits with her through Act 1—Do as I say, not as I do (or, rather, as I did).

Here, we also have Vander's partner—someone who knew him before, knew what he was, what he resented, and what he became, instead; and who bears the scars of what all their fallout grew to be. Someone who holds the memory of him tangibly, in multiple respects, as though it is something he physically cannot sever: Vander's knife, the Drop—and even, in some ways, Jinx.

Silco is still clinging to the idea of Vander, throughout the entire series. To the potential in their reunion at the cannery; to the reassurance of what he knew him to be (I knew you still had it in you; Vander wasn't the man you thought he was); to this need he has to still speak to him, even after everything.

But Vi was raised with the burden of being the eldest; being the one most capable of providing protection—and, as a consequence, with the burden of responsibility.

She's not only a sister to Jinx. She's a guardian to her—and in many respects, a stand-in mother. And Silco, as a surrogate father, is standing right in the middle of that. A roadblock between "Powder," as Vi knows her sister as, and "Jinx," as Silco knows his daughter to be.

Right at the forefront, we have so much conflict here. Vi is so similar to Vander, to the point that she is nearly his spirit incarnate—so much so that having her resurface from a presumed grave just sets fuel to fire for a vendetta Silco has never been able to snuff out.

But beneath that—far beneath that—they have so much in common. Vi's headstrong rebuttals in Act 1 about going against Piltover and striking them down, about being made to feel lesser her whole life and needing to fight against it, just sings with Silco's anger in the cannery (You'd die for the cause, but you won't fight for one?).

These are two kindred spirits, two revolutionaries willing to do anything for their city and those they love, and who aren't afraid to fight for it. Who want to fight for it.

But trapped between it all, we have Jinx. Someone Vi is not willing to sacrifice (i.e., her memory of Powder), and who Silco, by the end of the series, isn't willing to sacrifice, either (i.e., his loyalty to Jinx).

Vi, of course, could never fathom Silco being a father to Powder (how could she, after he is the reason Vander was taken from her?)—and looks for justifications for her hatred, in everything he does.

But the unfortunate truth of the matter is that for all Vander cherished and nurtured Vi as a vision of himself—so has Silco, to Jinx. He sees himself in her. He has empowered her, cherished her. He is so incredibly tender with her, in his own ways. And—for all his absolute faults, his skewed morals, his tunnel-visioned zealousy to achieve Zaun—he is a good father to Jinx, just as Vander was a good father to Vi.

The question I keep finding myself mulling over, though, is whether these two could find elements of that, once again, in each other.

There are so many things Silco isn't—not only in Vander's shadow, but simply in the character that he is. He doesn't come in swinging; he plots, he strategizes, he fights with words. He isn't a warm presence, or a jovial one; he's chilling, he's dry, he's distanced. There are countless contradictions one can draw between the two of them—and so many layers one can tease apart, on how their opposites attracted each other, how they worked (a balance that will no longer ever be).

But there are so many things Silco is. He's critical, he's fiercely rational, he knows how to weave a crowd around his finger with a single intonation. He admires the outcasts, the scrappers, those that have dredged through society to claw for what they can. He surrounds himself with them—and he operates alongside them, as an equal as much as an usurper.

He's a flavor of parenthood Vi didn't receive, but could have—the one that would have validated her need to fight; who would have taught her that strength comes in numbers, not in one's single ability to protect; who would have seen her snarkiness, her quick wit on her feet, and taught her to use it to her leverage.

The tragedy of the whole series is that Jinx needs them both to have balance in her life—to keep the tether of her child self and her trauma from splitting her apart at the seams—yet for Silco and Vi, as the narrative destines them for (and as it destined Silco and Vander for), any semblance of a connection between them is doomed for destruction.

There's too much they hold fiercely to themselves, in their own traumas, that they cannot set down—even for the sake of Jinx's needs. They are equally selfish, in that way. They want the version of Vander that they are not willing to let go of; and they want the version of Jinx that they know her to be.

But they could change. They could.

Silco did, by the end. Chose his daughter, his legacy, over the cause, over his vision of progress. And Vi did, too. Chose "peace," chose to set down the gauntlets, chose politics (and—arguably—complacency, in the same way Vander did) as the path forward.

But what if they set it all down, for Jinx? What if they became what she needed, on both sides? A father who sees her, nurtures her, like Vander saw and nurtured Vi—and a sister who loves and protects her, like Vi loved and protected Powder; who could learn, maybe, to love and protect "Jinx," too?

And maybe—just maybe—Silco and Vi could learn to appreciate each other, for all their surface hatreds. Find mentorship, find balance again, in each other. And through it, Vi could learn that protection, responsibility, isn't the only quality to strive for. That even she can be nurtured again, too.

#yes this is rapidly becoming the entire basis of heron blue and yes this is the central premise of the WIP i'm working on #shhh #listen these two are just #hhGHGHGH #silco and jinx have that special dysfunctional flavor of daddy issues out the roof #but let's just talk about vi with all that for a second #like???? #yes she will loathe silco until her deathbed for taking vander from her but like...vander gave this girl parentification issues for DAYS #there's some complications big time on both sides #arcane #rambles #arcane meta #arcane vi #arcane silco #arcane vander #i know i have completely left caitlyn out of the equation here #honestly - i could see their relationship developing more...genuinely's not the right word but? #separate from the context of vi being freed from prison? #something that comes more naturally from them seeing each other in their own contexts/working environments #and admiring/appreciating each others' opposites all the more for it #also just like #this is what jinx NEEDS it is the whole shakespearian tragedy of the entire conflict with these three #and the total angst ball of what that *could* be is just divine

[birdricks]

been thinking about this dialogue again.

#rick and morty #ooooooohhhhh. two sides of the same coin. #this ep is super fucking good btw in terms of beth characterisation #i was talking abt it w my sister last night #likeeee up until this ep the beths have been mostly competing. whos more real. whos more cool. #the two conflicting aspects of beth that led to her being cloned in the first place fighting #but they eventually come to not only tolerate each other but love and appreciate the ways theyre the same and the ways theyre different #ik its like the joke of 'haha self love to the extreme' but it rlly is just a big metaphor for self love #also to bring this back to jerry. lol #interesting that space beth claims to dislike jerry but beth points out the hypocrisy in that those exact traits #are things space beth loves about her #much like how beth herself likely has disdain for jerry becasue she recognises parts of herself in him #alsooo beth calling herself out in her destructive tendencies #gawdddd this ep is so good #i rlly wish we cld get more beth centric eps bc shes super interesting #ALSOOO this is the ep we get the insight of young jerry thinking it an honour to be torn apart by beth. ouch

[goldkirk]

I DON'T HAVE TO LIE ANYMORE!

#I DON'T HAVE TO LIE ANYMORE ABOUT ANYTHING #IT DOESN'T HAVE TO OVERRIDE ALL OTHER PROGRAMMING EVER AGAIN #HA #MY GOD THAT FEELS LIKE TWO DECADES OF RELIEF #and I found out yesterday. that this year. next winter. it IS two decades. exactly. this is the year. every day i am shown new reminders #that keep me going in my mission to relearn to fully and instinctually trust my self #ever since [redacted therapist] asked me point blank and my IMMEDIATE response was complete disbelief #a firm 'you think there's any universe where i'd feel like i could trust myself? after my nonstop history of failures and being horrible?' #tone “No!” of disbelief #and a horrible way-too-harsh laugh that bolted out before I could strangle it off and stop it. #that woman never coddled my feelings any time I spoke something alarming or bullshit and that was so helpful to me #and the tone she let exist in her voice when she responded to me with a very uncharacteristic “Oh Katie.” #was so. so much more agonizing for me. than her responding with an immediate logical slam-dunk of the truth about healthy behavior and stuf #anyway ramble over i'm so tired. i've done so much trauma work this week i am Drained emotionally #now i see what the past several months but especially especially #the baffling (to me) infuriating out-of-control-speedrun-somatic-processing + every-health-condition-flaring slog that December and January #were for me when I hadn't expected anything to be wrong #...and the extremely specific way this certain zone and particular incident kept coming up over and over and over and over and OVER was not #a bug. it was a feature. thank goodness i trust myself for little things now bc that's the only way i was able to get to this other side #and look back and suddenly realize that my subconscious and body knew what they needed and had a plan in progress the whole time. just like #i rationally say I trust them to have and do. #and that perhaps maybe. for real for real instead of just TELLING myself hard enough a lie that i trust my self and i trust my body and tha #they always know their own needs and timing if really slow down and listen to them f u l l y #anyway. yeah. bye haha i need to stop oversharing on the internet #trauma evolution #shh katie #personal #my god. i wished for this day more than i wished for anything else my whole life. all these many many many many years. what magic. #add to journal #abuse