#but that cat is an absolute asshole

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

having sensory problems is tough because how to i tell my stepdad that i want to throw a brick at him for having a snack in the same room as me-

#i had to go to my room i swear to god #the scrape of the fork the fucking mouth sounds IM A BITCH NOW SORRY #one wrong noise and i become an Asshole #internally. i will not outwardly express any of this #he's such a good person! he does not deserve the ire i feel when he makes The Wrong Noises which happens Quite Frequently! #now he's playing with the dog and i wanna throw TWO bricks at him #shutupshutupshutup theres too many noises at once im going to MAIM something #the tv the microwave the dog the fire the the the #punching something in my head... #absolutely unprompted #Man Don't You Have A Job To Go To Or Something. At *checks cat* Nine At Night #i might just. walk out into the dark woods for a bit. let the nonexistent wolves have me #maybe mothman will be there.... #IF HE BOOPS THE DOG ONE MORE TIME- #im evil now. im in my evil arc. im a hater. my heart burns with rage

[camelspit]

sophie absolutely had a warrior cats oc back in the day

#shes just like me fr #i had so many i dont even remember the details of any of them </3 oops #this is heavily inspired by the time i was messing around with the fitz ai #and we started warriors rping together #also sidenote. fitz is absolutely a powerplayer. asshole /lh #anyway they should have rp dates. just a thought. #i think they would both be cured if they got to play around as dramatic cats for a few hours #i wonder what sophies favorite characters/clan/etc. are #she feels like she'd be a leafpool/ravenpaw/graywing fan to me #but thats just off the top of my head #kotlc

[vettelcore]

people with outdoor cats be like: yes my cat came back home half dead, caught hiv, is full of parasites and sometimes has gone missing for weeks but i don't care bc at least the cat is free and not locked inside like selfish people do!!!

#i cannot fucking stress this enough PLEASE do not let your cats roam outside freely if you care about them #if they're used to going outside leash them!!!! #the amount of cats we get at the clinic who come almost dead/with horrible wounds bc they're allowed to be outside is insane #not to mention how many run over cats i see where i live #they could get attacked by other animals too #like its just not worth it #we had to put down a cat today after the owners found her almost dead with an INSANE infection bc she had ruptured her intestines #her hip was shattered too #looked like probably some asshole kicked her #and the owners were like oh we had just buried one of our other cats the other day after she got attacked by another animal #and im just standing there like ?????? and that's normal to you?????? #oh but at least the cats can climb trees though 🤪 #remember the dude i talked about a while ago who brought his cat in honestly the worst condition I've ever seen? #covered in poop vomit piss and fuck knows what else? #that had a colony of cats all infected with FelV bc he refuses to vax them? #yeah this woman was a family member btw #thank FUCK he didn't come today because that would've been a shitshow #all things considered at least this woman seems to be... not absolutely fucking insane? i guess? #but anyway she kept saying how it was sudden! and how the cat was perfectly fine last night! #oh my gOD that cat had maggots eating her from the inside that doesn't happen overnight #cats are tough and will hide a lot of pain but can't you just tell the truth??? #you either didn't care enough to bring this poor baby earlier or you just noticed now what had happened to her

[sb-essebi]

"I was surprised you'd stick up for Astarion"

Shadowheart. GIRL. He's biting me every night. You sleep right next to us. I'm bending my goody-two-shoes paladin ass over backwards to get him to like me. Do you not have eyes? You tought I'd sell him out to a monster hunter??? Girl. Girl, I figured out what your hand wound does. It's selective blindness. Shar, goddess of darkness, makes perfect sense, girl, Shadowheart, listen-

#sari plays bg3 #this woman! I swear!!! #driving me mad #I kind of hate that I've grown so fond of her?? #like. shar worship? BAD! and she can be unkind and uncaring and also ruthless. BUT. she also ends up liking doing good #and she CAN be cautious and patient and measured when she puts in the effort #and gale? he's not without sins. obviously. he's also very in the 'I regret that it didn't work' stage still rather than 'I regret doing #that' stage. which. I do get honestly? and he LOVES power. and he keeps spinning every story in a way he never admits he does love power #but he's SO nice. I love the way he talks. he's so intense about magic. so sweet about mystra. he's insane about his cat. #he locked himself in his tower moping for a year. it's implied that said tower was MEGA cluttered with artefacts before that. #how can you not love him at least a little bit? right? #I love how complex the characters are in this game #like even astarion- am I insane about him? yes. absolutely. I talk to him just to look at his face. I stare at his hands when he talks. BUT #he can be an asshole. just AWFUL. but I'm getting to know him so much and honestly who wouldn't be like that after what he's been through.. #I'm 20 hours into the game and already I can't wait for future playthroughs where I spend more time with different characters #karlach and halsin are so fun! wyll is such a disaster! lae'zel is such a bitch! I love all of them.

[lucy-lockwood]

Honestly, I'm surprised that there aren't more Lockwood and Co Modern AUs / No Problem fics which adapt Skull as Lucy's online friend.

Only she can talk to him (she's the one who connects with him online and he's never met any of her irl friends or family, who also have never met him)

He's sarcastic as hell and feels like he has free reign to say all sorts of bullshit bc he knows the people involved will never hear him (not a feature of all internet friendship but can be)

Doesn't know his actual name, only knows him as 'Skull' (he doesn't share his real name online, maybe the nickname is derived from his username or icon)

A connection that can have elements of danger (99% of internet friendship is a blessing but talking to people online can be dangerous/toxic)

The risk can make it difficult to explain that despite the fact Skull could be planning to kill her if given the chance, he's still very important to her and probably her best friend

Idk, just food for thought. If anyone knows any fics which feature Skull in this role, do link them for me! I've never actually read one but it seems like too good an adaptation for nobody else to have ever thought of it lol

#I love fics where he's a cat bc it absolutely suits him but I do miss his snarky dialogue #fics where he's a real boy are very fun but you lose that element of him being the funny asshole nobody can hear whispering in Lucy's ear #lockwood and co #lockwood & co #lucy carlyle #carlyle and skull™ #the bastard skull

[faraige]

I was carefully frogging some rows on my knitting while my cat sat on my lap, so without me noticing he bit the yarn and split it in half :')

#knitblr #knitting #cat #cats #he's a little fucking asshole #was it already a bad day? yes. did that made it worse? absolutely? #but I was so brave about it #shut up faraige #yarnblr

[idk-bruh-20]

Irondad fic ideas #45

Peter finds a tiny kitten in a car engine one night (could be on patrol or on the way home from school) and May, surprisingly, is on board with keeping it. Peter reads online that in the early ages cats need to socialize a lot so that they're more friendly with new people, so, since he's on summer break, whenever May's not home he just takes the cat everywhere. Just holds it in his hand.

He shows up to Tony's lab like, "Hey Mr. Stark!" completely normal, and Tony's like, "...what's with all the meowing?" and Peter pulls a cat out, presenting it proudly.

Tony's heard all sorts of animal horror stories from his parents because Howard didn't want a pet, so at first Tony's like, "Get it out of my lab." But he can't resist Peter's puppy eyes. The cat stays. Cut to like a month later and Tony has to watch Peter's cat for some reason, and Tony does that thing that dads do where they're like "we're not getting a pet >:(" then "this is my child and if anything happened to it I would kill all of you and then myself."

He says it's because Peter would be devastated. But really, that's only half of it.

This fic idea was submitted by @derpmallow !

#happy 5 year anniversary to derpmallow's cat #derpmallow's fic ideas #this is SO adorable #and so accurate tony would absolutely be a cat dad 100% #irondad fic ideas #irondad fic idea #fic ideas #fic idea #love the added touch of howard being the asshole who instilled anti-pet sentiment in tony so changing his mind is like healing as well #peter parker #tony stark #may parker #irondad and spiderson #iron dad and spider son #ironfam

[uselessnbee]

sometimes i feel so petty i want to make a big post about all the times Will and El weren't that great towards Mike just to ..you know.. balance it out a bit

#it's always here's all the times Mike hurt Will and El's feelings and never here's all the times Will and El hurt Mike's feelings #it's so unfair like i saw people hating Mike over fucking MILKSHAKES because they just had to find a reason to hate him it's so stupid #if i went on here and started hating on Will and El for not laughing at Mike's vomit green joke cause it made him sad yall would call me #absolutely crazy and delusional like be fucking for real Mike just breathes wrong in Will's or El's direction and he's the devil himself #but Will and El could literally call Mike a slur to his face and yall would be like hE dESeRvEd iT tHeY DiDnT dO aNyThiNG wRoNG like fr #there are so many small times when Mike tried to get Will's attention like the vomit green joke or the they're conspiring against me moment #and everyone always just laughs how Mike is a loser trying to get their attention but they always just ignore him or whatever but if it was #reversed? if it was Will trying to get Mike's attention only for Mike to either ignore him or yell in his face how it's stupid to be #concerned about something so small? oh yall would go ballistic suddenly yall wouldn't care how small these things are suddenly you would #want Mike fucking dead but when it's the other way around it's just funny and embarassing for Mike? and not just small things like this #when we point out how El invalidated his feelings and dismissed his bullying everyone is like oh she didn't mean that she meant it like #this she meant it like that she said it because of this and that and the situation is like this so this is why she said that #and blah blah blah she didn't do anything wrong but when it comes to Mike suddenly it doesnt matter if he meant it differently or if it was #the situation and messy feelings making him say something hurtful no he's just an asshole oh i am cursing you all #i hope you step on lego every day and your favorite snack is always sold out in every shop i hope every cat you try to call will ignore you #or hiss at you i am so tired of the double standards when it comes to Mike and willel i am so angry #mike wheeler #mike wheeler protection squad #blue's 'mike's extreme defender' ramblings #i got a little carried away in the tags but i'm not sorry i said what i said #and idc if i get hate for it cause i'm right anyways

[bunnyb34r]

I swear to God my house is fucking haunted (I mean I knew it was but like MORE haunted) like theres been shit falling over for no reason all fucking day

The hair spray bottle that hasnt been touched in months fell off the sink. Something in the kitchen fell, I did not investigate. The tv antenna was knocked down. And just now there was a fucking stuffed animal avalanche bc like three fucking stuffed animals that havent been touched in YEARS launched off the top shelf and knocked my hello kitty water dispenser down (thankfully I do not use it, it is decorative), both the doll rooms off (breaking one :( minor damage but still), the one apparently load bearing plushie behind the dispenser fell in the empty space, and the stupid straw hat I have kept falling when I put it back.

Like what's your fucking problem??? Am I not paying enough attention to you fucking ghosts?? Are you trying to get my attention to tell me something? Bc if so I ain't gonna listen if you keep knockin my shit down. I fucking have two drinks on the nightstand where the dispenser is and I'm so fucking lucky they didnt get hit bc god I would be LIVID. Like cant you write on the bathroom mirror or send me coins like yall usually do?? What do you want?????

#there was absolutely no reason for this shit to drop yall are just being asshole ghosts #and before anyone tries to dispute the fact my house is haunted/ghosts aren't real shut up bc i know theyre here i have proof #they can apparently affect electrical shit like in the sims bc after my dad died like a year after I had gone downstairs to get something #and i hit all 3 light switches bc its a habit. anyway the one hasnt worked in over a decade and we've tried to fix it to no avail. anyway tm #they ALL turned on and it's been working ever since like agdgdgd hello?? and i can feel their presence a lot like when the cats visit me #i remember dad saying he SAW our first cat's ghost clear as day a couple months after he passed and we've all felt his presence 🥺 #i have other incidents but anyway yknow pennies from heaven? well we lost so many people in 4 years so there was confusion on who sent #the coins yknow? well my dad sends quarters. i KNOW it's him and he knew i collect them. aunt k sends nickels @ #and idr who sends dimes but i know those two. also bluejays are dad like cardinal's are passed loved ones we know it's dad #i used to be a skeptic and be like okay yall are just bullshiting but nah i get it this shit is real #also possession/reincarnation is real sgdgdgdg but again another story another time #marquilla

[scoreplings]

cat climbed inside the trash can and got melted ice cream all over his fur. and then discovered he loves baths

#hes a baaath boyyy #such an asshole. but hes so stinkin cute #i was like bet u wont do that again you wet idiot baths suck #but he loved it 😭 started playing in the water and purred the whole time i dried him off. #at least he isnt traumatized. but he is absolutely smart enough to learn playing in trash=fun bath time so i gotta stop that from happening #alistair #worlds smartest cat and he uses it all for evil

[jadequarze]

MISO WHY ARE YOU BLOCKING THE DOOR??!! I NEED TO GET OUT

This took like half an hour of in game time to actually nudge him away, this asshole cat istg

Coming back into the house to cook something oh my fucking gOD! DAMN YOU CAT!!1!

#jade plays #btw in my brain miso is freeloader's real name #so just imagine the daily life of astrel after a few years of her rescuing miso and now that he's comfortable #he's being an absolute asshole of a magic cat

[aaronymous999]

Not a fan of redemption Mapleshade headcanons and storylines, not because I don’t like her but because let women be evil!!

Also Mapleshade kinda read as a metaphor for parents who uh let their children die because of their own beliefs and shit. ( cough parents who refuse to vaccinate children ) so personally I really don’t like the idea of redeeming her for this very reason 😭 although I think it’s cat fantasized enough that call her a silly gal all you want or whateva

Been a lot of discussion about gender and evilness on warrior cats tumblr lately so here’s a summarized version of my takes:

-Rainflower and Crowfeather are equally awful, but don’t treat Rainflower any better because of how some fans treat Crowfeather. I don’t think Crowfeather is written particularly well but it’s also worth noting that a lot of fans like him more because well. He’s a protagonist and has a lot more content to theorize over than Rainflower who just straight up bullies her disabled child. Although you can still like Rainflower if you want, just let’s not bbygirl ify parents like Rainflower or Crowfeather.

-More Bramblestar slander on my feed PLEASEEE

-Sometimes people blame things on characters when… babe the writing is just awful. I know a character is told by the narrative to do something cool but then never actually is shown doing it, I don’t believe that’s a fault of the character I believe that’s bad writing.

-Not related to any fandom discourse actually but can we talk about how boygirl and girlboy core some of the warrior cats characters are because I have never come across this many in fiction

-I also think it’s worth noting that despite how much I really don’t like Mapleshade and Rainflower for their actions ( not as characters I actually like them as characters and the roles they fill in the story ) the actions of the male villains and antagonists in Warriors are way worse and often are not acknowledged for how awful they are and it’s good to acknowledge them but you shouldn’t try and apologize for characters who have in writing no mistake on the writers, done horrible shit. You can still like Mapleshade and Rainflower without excusing what they’ve done. Mapleshade blatantly murdered her own children due to negligence, do I like her tho? Yeah. I do.

#aaronymous ramblings #warriors #warrior cats #rainflower #mapleshade #bramblestar #discourse ig #crowfeather #abuse tw #point out shitty male warrior cats characters all you want and prop up shitty female characters but please i do not wanna see more #rainflower apologism it comes off as incredibly ableist #also its okay to enjoy shitty characters as long as you acknowledge their wrongdoings #like I like Jayfeather but he’s an absolute asshole #like jayfeather haters are often dismissed because Jayfeather is so beloved but like #no they’re right I just still like him anyways because hes interesting #same thing with mapleshade like no no she did murder her children and people who didnt deserve it i just think shes an interesting kitty and #i still really like her #also as bad as rainflower is tho worst parent of the year award goes to clear sky definitely

[kipper-the-dog]

Why is every single road user in Erin Hunter books so bloodthirsty

#warrior cats #survivors dogs #like I get it some people are assholes who would absolutely spoed to hit a cat #but most?? #nowhere ever is a car described as slowing down but I think that’s what 80% people would do #accidents happen I know but it’s so funny #average British car driver out for blood

[ghost-proofbaby]

Helppp there's a little cat hanging out outside my house trying to come in and it has a collar on so I went outside to check for a number or something and there's nothing the the collar, just a little bell and it is so cute. But we can't figure out who's cat it is??

the cat system has just given you your assigned cat. good luck soldier 🫡

#thank u ily <3 #although the bell is giving fae #my biggest fear is my cat is an outdoors cat (i have a doggie door and he comes and goes as he pleases) and he won’t wear a collar #so i just KNOW there’s at least ONE neighbor who also thinks he’s their cat #like absolutely not that is my grumpy lil asshole

[starstaiined]

violently sobbing at almost 4am about travis martinez

#my tiktok fyp keeps giving me travis slander videos and i am sick of it #going to bite something actually #leave my boy alone #my pathetic little wet cat #with his stupid sad boy middle part #yes hes an asshole in s1 but he learns and grows #he was as much a kid as any of them #dealing with the same amount of trauma #arguably more so than most of the other girls at the beginning actually #like he SAW his father DIE in front of him #physically watched it happen knowing his weight on the branch contributed to it snapping and pulverizing the way it did #like yea no shit hes going to be lashing out #does it excuse it? no! but he does try to apologize and be better!! and he is!!! #like hell the amount of FORGIVING that boy does is absolutely insane #for doomcoming ALONE #not only forgiving but then still actively trying to help when he didnt have to #see shauna giving birth scene #and then forgiving natalie #like i love nat i do #but as an older sibling? the shit she pulled with tricking him into thinking javi was dead so they'd stop looking? #unforgivable #if it were my little sibling and that came to surface? hell would rain down #and not only does he FORGIVE her but he then ALOLOGIZES for being an asshole about it!!!! #for a situation in which he was entirely justified to be pissed about!!!! #and then he RISKED HIS LIFE to save hers!!!!!!! #HE TACKLED SHAUNA AND THE KNIFE #GOT HER TO RUN WHILE BLOCKING THE DOOR AND FIGHTING OFF ALL OF THE OTHER GIRLS #WHO ARE NOT ONLY OUT FOR BLOOD BUT WHO HAVE ALREADY TRIED TO SACRIFICE HIM ONCE!!!!!!! #like yea he has faults but he's a complex character and not a fucking villain #travis martinez

[science-lings]

Still mad at my lawyer brother for not giving his kitten one of my brilliant name suggestions so I'm going to do the next best thing and headcanon Phoenix getting a cat when Trucy moves out so he's not lonely

#he deserves a needy loud stray that just showed up one day that he got attached to like every other person in his life #make the little guy blind and call him justice #he shows more respect for that mr. justice than apollo #he would be such a little shit about it #phoenix wright #apollo allows it bc he's a cat guy and only visits japanifornia to see his namesake #you cannot tell me that Phoenix Wright tamer of people who are assholes wouldn't love a disaster cat #he asks it to help him with paperwork #it jumpscares him by jumping on his back whenever he's too hyperfocused on something #it shows Pess who's boss and then becomes her best friend #also you cannot tell me that phoenix wouldn't absolutely hate having an empty house #he needs a cat to loaf on his back when he's collapsed on the floor bc his spine is bad