#but that day is not today | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

emmyrosee · 1 year

Text

It’s not common to see Atsumu fuming.

Genuine anger, not the petty shit he throws at you when he decides he wants to be an obnoxious turd to yourself or his brother.

You can tell the difference, too, because a petulant pout and attitude is plastered on that pretty face of his, but when he’s genuinely mad, there’s no attitude; it’s just raw emotion and lips pulled in a straight line, his chest giving irregular, short breaths because he can’t breathe. It’s almost scary, but it happens so little that you’ve learned to manage it when it does happen.

This is one of those rare occasions you have no clue which he’s feeling.

The car door outside slams shut, sending a nervous chill up your spine, but it’s immediately squashed when you hear Hisako’s innocent laughter. You smile and turn towards the now opening door, and you give atsumu a fake, sympathetic look when his thick brows are furrowed in frustration. On his leg, Hisako’s tiny arms are wrapped around him, her legs locked around his ankle and her smile that’s missing a tooth is beaming up at him.

“You,” he scolds, looking down at his menace of a six year old. “Go upstairs. And don’t come out until you’re seventy-eight.”

“Can I hug mommy first?”

“If you must,” he growls. With that, Hisako quickly bounds over to you and reaches her arms up for a hug, and while you give her one, you watch as Atsumu paces the floor, cards his hair, chews on his cuticles, anything to make him calm down.

“Daddy’s mad,” she whispers in your ear.

You offer her a snort, “I know.” With a kiss to her head you plant her back to her feet and nudge her to go into her room, waiting until to door closes before you turn back to your husband.

“Atsumu-“

“I’m not ready for this,” he growls. “The little traitor, I can’t believe she’d do this to me- my own flesh and blood.”

“Don’t word it like that, you make it sound like she committed arson or something.”

He softens and pouts like a dog; clearly, whatever it is, it’s taking a toll, and you sigh before you walk over and plant a kiss to his forehead. “Whatever it was, I know it wasn’t on purpose; what happened?”

“She’s just not ready, okay, she just doesn’t know-“

“Sweetheart, you need to let me in here-“

“He was holding her hand!” He whines, scrubbing his face with his hands. “They-They-They were holding hands! I thought I had a few more years to prepare for this shit! Wanted to wait before I put the fear back into these damn boys! I can’t fight a six year old!”

You pause. You retract your hand and give him an absolute smirk.

“You’re kidding me?”

“Sure ain’t!” He barks, crossing his arms over his chest. He’s so mad his forehead vein makes itself known with a sheen of sweat. “Tomorrow, I’m going to that damned school, and I’m moving her classes!”

“Honey,” you say sweetly, gently grabbing his arm to ground him. “It’s okay; I’m the one who told her to be nice to this boy.”

Instantly, his head whips in betrayal. His eyes are blown wide, muscles tense and despite how angry he looks, he can’t find the words to convey it.

“YOU WHAT?”

You shake your head, “she asked me why she feels butterflies in her tummy when she sees him.” To try and soothe him, you hook your head over his shoulder and bat your eyes innocently, “and I told her that it’s the same feeling I get when I see you-“

“Don’t try to be sweet, I’m mad at you,” he snarls, but there’s a softness in his eye that makes you think he’s not as serious as he thinks he comes across. A massive hand cards through his hair and he looks up to the sky as if to ask for patience. “I can’t believe this. My two babies, the loves of my life, betraying me in such juvenile ways.”

“Atsumu, spell juvenile,” you challenge.

“Spell ‘no’,” he grumbles. You sigh and gently grab his arm to pull him to the couch, and for a few seconds he puts up a small fight, but does end up giving into you in the end.

“Sweetie, listen to me,” you soothe. “Hisako is six. She’s going to start having little crushes soon enough-“

“Fuck, stop reminding me,” he whines.

You shake your head and rub a soothing hand on his back. “And all we can do is let her express those feelings in healthy ways; it’s what we’ve always done.”

“What if he hurts her?”

“He’s six.”

“What if he breaks her heart?”

“I’m sure she’ll cope.”

“What if he-“

“Atsumu.” Your hands squish his cheeks. “Calm down; she’s going to be okay.” You smile and kiss his pouted lips, “you remember what it was like having a crush at school-“

“Excuse you,” he grumbles from his squished cheeks, shaking his head from your grip. “I’ve only ever been in love with you.”

“You’ve told me about your relationship with Rintaro, trust me, that was a crush.”

“Was not!”

“Was too.”

“Was not!”

“It absolutely was.” You smile warmly, “and that’s fine. But now, you need to let her experience the same thing. She’s a big girl. Besides,” you nudge your nose with his, “you’ll always be her favorite man.”

“That’s actually Osamu, but I appreciate it.” Your words do seem to calm him down however, and he wraps a big arm around you to settle into the couch, “I just love her, baby… just want her to be safe.”

“I know; and she will be.”

The silence you get comfortable in gets interrupted by the door to your home getting flung open, and while you jump in the air in shock, next to you, Atsumu chuckles.

“Speaking of the devil.”

“What did you-“

Before you can say anything, Miya Osamu suddenly stands in the middle of your living room, the hat on his head tampered with and his apron turn on his hip, his head lined with sweat as if he ran here. Your jaw slacks in surprise, “Osamu, you did not leave work to come here-“

“WHAT STUPID LITTLE SNOT WAS HOLDING HER HAND?”

6K notes · View notes

dear-ao3 · 3 months

Text

”i’d like to be my old self again but i’m still trying to find it” is such a baller lyric. like people don’t talk about that part of a break up enough. you can be over it all you want but the accepting that things are now different and you are not the same person you were at the beginning is sometimes the hardest part

#me last night #anyway #remembered how much i love singing loudly in cars once again today #things i was robbed of for two years #one day i will in depth compare and contrast the importance of all too well and better man on the same album #but that day is not today #not a tag #from saph #yall breakups are easy #finding yourself after is harder

547 notes · View notes

im-this-kind-of-girl · 7 months

Text

Aziraphale and Crowley's unhinged character analyzis (pt1)

Controversial opinion:

Aziraphale and Crowley at the end of Season2 managed to accomplish the main goal they each had since the beginning of time. Only to realize that what they wanted no longer made them happy.

It sounds crazy, but to explain myself I have to do an in-depth analysis of their personalities and the possible transformation arc that both characters are probably going to have at the end of the Good Omens story.

Disclaimer: I have no idea about what is going to happen in Good Omens. This analysis could clearly be considered a theory since I'm not Neil Gaiman, but as someone who knows about narrative and character structure, I'm going to elaborate. Also, English is not my first language, so sorry in advance.

Aziraphale

First let's talk about Aziraphale. For two reasons, firstly because he is the one who seems to deserve the most defense right now; and second because Aziraphale, in my opinion, is the main character of Good Omens. This is because Aziraphale, out of the two, is the one who is likely to have the biggest change in his personality once his arc ends.

In a story, especially one like Good Omens with many characters, it is common for there to be many arcs, as every character has something to learn. Crowley, as a co-protagonist and love interest, is clearly going to have a change at the end of the plot, but his change won't be as big as our angel's.

First things first, what is a transformation arc?

It is the transformation that a character undergoes from the beginning to the end of the story. Basically, at the beginning of a story, a character is in a certain state of equilibrium, he lives and thinks in a certain way until he is exposed to a situation that forces him to act outside of his comfort zone. During this, he will undergo different changes that will be reflected in actions that take him away from his natural state until the climax, where the character will make a decision that will change his normality forever. This is important. In every story, the climax marks a before and after in the protagonist's life: whatever he decides at this moment has no turning back and will mark his life forever, so that after the climax, the character may again have a state of equilibrium but different from the initial one.

What is the climax of Good Omens? Well, in the 1st season we have the bodie swap and in the second season the separation of Crowley and Aziraphale. But of the story itself? It's still a mystery.

Neil Gaiman has already confirmed that Good Omens is a three-act story, so its climax will be located at the end of season 3. We still don't know what definitive change there will be in our characters… although throughout the series we have enough clues to at least know what they probably have to work on changing.

Aziraphale's Role

In order to analyze Aziraphale we must begin by understanding his role within the angelic hierarchy. Aziraphale was created as a Cherub and then, after Eden, became a Principality. Both ranks have one thing in common: they are guardian roles.

Cherubs are second in the highest circle of heaven, below Seraphims. They are described as "guardians of the universe from a divine plane and without direct contact with humans, although they positively influence them". On the other hand, Principalities are seventh within the last circle of the angelic hierarchy, and the highest rank within it. They are the guardians of nations and countries, overseeing global events within politics and commerce.

So, Aziraphale was created with the main purpose of being only one thing: a soldier. His function is to obey and protect objects, places and beings. That is why he was the angel who received the sword of fire, his task was to protect Eden. But he also has a very strong sense of intrinsic goodness that has led him to make erratic decisions throughout history that question just how much he is willing to obey orders.

If Aziraphale feels that something is wrong, he won't do it. It doesn't matter if he has to go against Heaven or sin. It doesn't matter if killing a child saves the rest of the world, he won't do it. It doesn't matter if God will grant Job new children, he can't stand idly by. These actions make him stand out from the rest. A simple soldier just obeys while Aziraphale has a critical mind, he has too strong of an opinion about right and wrong. If an event happens that he considers evil, Aziraphale will go to great lengths to prevent it.

It is remarkable that the first thing he did having free will was to give his sword to Adam and Eve. Of course he did it with the function of protecting them but, by giving them his only weapon, Aziraphale was left in a serious state of vulnerability. He did it because he is good and kind, but it could also be considered an act of sacrifice. Here enters another important issue when talking about Aziraphale that relates to religion itself.

The Martyr Hero

One of the most basic conceptions about the Christianity is that without sacrifice a person cannot really be good. Jesus was crucified to free us from our sins; Job sacrificed his whole life to prove that his faith was genuine. Even centuries later, the ecclesiastical institution maintains that the more you suffer, the poorer you are, the more chances you have of ending up in Heaven.

All the sacrifices made in life will eventually be rewarded in the Kingdom of God. It is the eternal figure of the martyr that is worshipped in Church, the idea that to really love, to really do good, sacrifices must be made.

Aziraphale believes this blindly. Now, he is an angel, not a human. He will not have an eventual reward of any kind, and that does not matter to him, because he considers himself lucky to be able to be a being of light who brings happiness to others no matter the price he has to pay. He was willing to fall only to save the lives of Job's children just because it was the right thing to do.

Performing actions for your own happiness without thinking of the consequences is frowned upon throughout the Bible. It is considered selfish and is a great source of guilt for all its faithful.

There is a line from the Good Omens Musical that has always stayed with me. When they argue, Crowley tries to talk some sense into Aziraphale by claiming all the reasons why he should help him avoid Armageddon, to which Aziraphale replies "you and I are not important."

Why didn't Aziraphale quickly give in to the proposal to stop the end of the world? Why didn't he tell Crowley where the Antichrist was without hesitation? Why did he help Gabriel in spite of everything? Why didn't he kiss Crowley back although he wanted to?

Truth be told, Aziraphale does not prioritize his own happiness because he does not consider himself important.

At the center of it all is God, good and ineffable who would never let anything happen unless it is not amenable to the greater good, then there is all the rest. Aziraphale believes he is just a soldier with a mission: to protect the Earth and everything he considers worth saving. He is not on this list: his welfare does not matter to him because, in the grand order of things, Aziraphale does not believe he is important.

There is no afterlife reward for him, though that doesn't stop him from feeling guilty about wanting it.

Aziraphale's dilemma

Aziraphale's great dilemma ould be summed up as:

Do I do what I want or do I do what I must?

Should he obey the rules or get what his heart yearns for now that it is within his grasp?

Throughout Good Omens, we learn Aziraphale has given into various temptations such as food. But these sins are small in comparison to what he really wants. For how does he explain to God that what his heart desires the most is to be able to love the Serpent of Eden?

He is madly in love with Crowley. He could lose everything: his bookstore, restaurants, music, art, but the feelings he has for him will never go away. It were years of repression, believing that if he loved him in silence, everything would be okay.

Now, in the season finale, Crowley expresses it, confesses and kisses him, offering him what he has always secretly wanted on a silver platter.

But Aziraphale was also offered a place in Heaven, finally being accepted by the family he misses. Aziraphale spent the entire 2nd season getting involved in trying to save Gabriel, in bringing Maggie and Nina together, getting perhaps a little too invested because he clearly missed having a purpose.

He was not well emotionally. He missed feeling that he does good because, despite everything, he believes in the potential that Heaven has. Aziraphale knows that if he is in charge, if he gives up everything that makes him happy, if he stops being selfish as he was all these years, he can make the necessary change to prevent the End of the World.

Aziraphale is a soldier whose main goal has always been to protect. Becoming the supreme Archangel he is able to protect everyone he loves. Because of this, he decides to sacrifice his earthly happiness and make the most difficult decision but the one he feels is right: to leave Earth, reject Crowley and become Head of Heaven.

The end of his arc and Crowley

Like any arc, Aziraphale's is clearly at the end of the story. He's already changed a lot, and he's done mostly so because of Crowley. Not just because of love, no, Crowley manages to awake something in him. Crowley is the driving force that encourages change in him, that reaffirms or questions his beliefs whenever he is in doubt about whether something is right or wrong. He inspires something that Aziraphale, an obedient soldier of the Lord never had: freedom.

Obviously, our angel always had that spark of freedom, though repressed, hidden in the darkest part of his being because he knows it is something that makes him different from the rest and he doesn't like to admit that he doesn't fit in Heaven.

Because this means that he doesn't fit in Hell either, nor on Earth completely. Ergo, admitting to being different means confirming his suspicion that he doesn't fit in anywhere. But he never had to pretend this with Crowley.

Knowing all this, how will Aziraphale's arc end?

Well, he's going to have to choose between heart and duty again. Aziraphale is going to want to save Earth at the Second Coming, that's obvious. He is going to be forced to disobey Heaven once again as he realizes that he cannot change them. In this way, he will confirm something tragic: his sacrifice was in vain.

But it is necessary that he can assume this in order to understand that he is wrong:

It is not necessary to suffer in order to deserve love.

It is not necessary to sacrifice everything that makes you happy to prove you are good.

Eternal sacrifice is not the solution. Aziraphale has to learn that being happy and being loved is not a reward that has to be given, no, it is something he is worthy of without the need to sacrifice his life. Aziraphale must understand that he does not have to prove that he is a good person by martyrdom. He is a good person because he is empathetic, smart and sweet.

The secret is to find the balance between love and duty, between good and evil, to embrace his freedom and find happiness by accepting his mistakes that make him different from the rest. The easiest way is to learn to love in the most genuine way: the human way. Discovering that love does not necessarily have to be painful or repressed, that he can do it openly, that what he feels is not a test of faith, but the reward he has been waiting for all these years.

Aziraphale will ultimately become free through Crowley's love.

#stay tuned for crowley's analysis #some day i'll get over these two #but that day is not today #good omens #aziraphale #aziracrow #aziraphale and crowley #ineffable husbands #neil gaiman #character analysis #terry pratchett #crowley #good omens aziraphale #martyrs #transformation arc #good omens theory #amazon prime #give me s3 or give me death

620 notes · View notes

alm0staliv3 · 11 months

Text

I don't listen to Repugnant but that does not stop me from simping for Mary Goore

#it's the name choice #and the emo nonbinary swag #one day the 200k fic about them being the antichrist raised by the clergy good omens style will exist outside my head #but that day is not today #mary goore #repugnant #tobias forge #tender father #ghost #ghost bc #ghumblr #ghost band #the band ghost #ellis.png

544 notes · View notes

and-his-hands-were-24-crows · 12 days

Text

Someday the people at the bubble tea cafe are going to notice what I'm doing there every week.

#but that day is not today #(because I was there yesterday)#good omens #good omens fanart #good omens after dark #nsft #(implicitly now - explicitly later)#WIP #digital sketch #i made this #24 crows art

93 notes · View notes

a-mint-bear · 1 month

Text

Your Secret Admirer

Female Yandere x Reader

Part 1

The story of your secret admirer and how she fell in love with you.

[tw: suicidal ideation] - it's vague but it's there.

Part 2

She'd been alone for some time.

===========

Her father traveled for work, she could count the number of times he'd been home and seen her in the last ten years on one hand. Her mother had been more attentive when she was younger, from what she could remember, but that stopped pretty abruptly when her younger brother had been born. He had a lot of health problems and spent a lot of his childhood in and out of hospitals, their mother stayed by his side. She didn't really know him, and he didn't know her.

Between her father's job and her brother's health, she had attended a new school every couple of years. When she finally felt settled, every time, they would pick up and move again. She stopped trying to make friends fairly early on.

She made sure to never cause trouble and worry her family. She was always the perfect daughter. Never underfoot or in the way, even when she wanted her family's attention more than anything.

No one to cry with when things got hard. No one to nurse her back to health when she was sick. No one to celebrate her birthdays with her. No one to say good morning or good night to.

No matter how good her grades were or what she achieved, they never looked her way. They didn't need to check in on her; she was their healthy child, the one who never caused any trouble, who could take care of herself. She knew they loved her, but she couldn't remember the last time they had actually told her so, or even showed her. Her mother had her brother and her parents had each other, there was no one who was only hers.

She had always been on her own.

Even when she'd started college, every day was still so meaningless... nothing really mattered. She never found anything she wanted to be or do... She found herself just going to her classes day after day, never speaking to anyone, just because she was... supposed to, to stay out of the way.

Then, that day, she was walking to her classes when everything just... stopped.

She couldn't take it anymore. Why should she keep going? There wasn't anything for her to look forward to anyway... She couldn't bring herself to take another step. What was the point? In any of it?

If she were to disappear, how long would it take her family to notice? There wasn't anywhere meant for her... no one to look to... and a future that was getting harder and harder to picture herself in.

If she walked off and kept on walking... would anyone even notice? She wanted the world to stop so she could just... breathe.

She was so empty, it physically hurt.

The world slammed back into motion when she was suddenly knocked to the ground. There was a stinging, throbbing pain on the side of her wrist.

And there you were.

You were apologizing over and over, saying you weren't watching where you were going. You hovered with a worried look as she got up, she was still kind of out of it.

When you saw that she had scraped her hand on the concrete in the collision, you reached out without thinking. When you took her hand in yours, she couldn't breathe. You led her to a nearby bench and sat with her, getting into your bag. You got out a surprisingly cute bandage and stuck it on, still apologizing and fussing, but all she could focus on was your touch.

It jolted everything awake inside her. She was hyperaware of everything. The way the sun hit your eyes, the smell of your shampoo, the nervous lilt in your voice as you kept on apologizing.

And your warmth. She was in awe at it; it had been so long since she'd felt another person's warmth. A kind voice, a comforting look in their eyes.

Everything about you filled that empty space.

You asked her if she was okay, and those words finally broke through.

"Yes." she nodded, suddenly aware of how rude she might've seemed. "Thank you... for helping me... um?"

You just smiled and told her your name. It sounded so... right.

She told you hers back, and to you it was something so inconsequential. An accidental meeting between two strangers not likely to ever meet again.

But to her, it was everything.

You flashed one more warm smile and gave one last sincere apology before standing, and it took everything in her to not ask you not to go. But that would be strange, right? She was just a stranger to you, you didn't owe her that. But she wanted so badly for you to stay.

And when you were gone, all she wanted was to see you again.

===========

The next day, you were on the same route. She watched from a ways away, trying to figure out what your day looked like, when would be the best time to come and see you again... But the longer she watched, the more she found herself... nervous? She'd never felt this way before.

If she said the wrong thing, or made a bad impression on you, she was afraid you would look right through her, like everyone else did.

Look at me.

It became her mantra. It repeated over and over in her head as she watched you, she uttered it again and again like a prayer as she fell asleep to thoughts of you. She poured the words like a blessing into everything she made for you. It became her fondest wish.

She had daydreams of you. Always of you seeing her again. In some, you smiled and called to her. When you said her name again it would fill her with such warmth. In others you looked at her with disgust and fear at discovering how she'd been following you. She was surprised to find that he latter option gave her such a strange thrill.

As long as you were looking at her, it didn't matter to her with what intention.

She left you gifts. Little things to guide you back to her, when the time was right. She wrote her thoughts in love notes she would slip into your bag or leave where only you would find them. She left a bookmark with pressed baby's breath flowers in the book you checked out from the library. They were small and didn't stand out among other, brighter flowers, but staring at their tiny, delicate blossoms made her feel... something. She wasn't quite sure what. She'd taken flowers from the same branching stem, set them in resin, and made them into a necklace as something like a matching set. It made her feel close to you, in her own way.

You used to spend what felt like forever looking over the things she left you, sometimes with a smile, sometimes with surprise or confusion, but always something behind your eyes that made her heart skip a beat.

But after a while, you started to ignore the things she left you. No surprise or raised eyebrows, or funny little smiles at her clumsy poetry. Not even annoyance or disgust at finding yet another trinket she'd made you or the all-too-personal fantasies she'd left in a note. Just...

Nothing.

You just left them where you found them and kept going about your life, like it didn't matter. Like she didn't matter.

You couldn't see her anymore.

It left her feeling sick.

She cried and screamed in that empty house, where no one heard her. Just another place where she wasn't really... there. You'd become such a comfort to her, but now all she could do was sit alone with her thoughts. She skipped her classes, she couldn't eat, she couldn't sleep, but there was no one to notice. No one to care. She was spiraling down into something awful. She started thinking of all the ways she could get your attention again, none of them as pleasant as the gifts and notes like before.

Love her or hate her, anything was better than the cold indifference that stabbed through her heart, ripping out every piece of you and making her empty again.

She couldn't go back to that. She refused to feel that horrible ache again. She made a plan. It was time for you two to reunite, no matter the consequences.

"Just you wait..." she smiled, holding her necklace tight, gently caressing the smooth surface under her thumb. She held it to her lips as her mantra ran through her mind over and over again.

"You'll finally see me..."

===========

an anon asked for a longer story for The Secret Admirer yandere girl

Original Yandere Girl Types post

#female yandere #yandere girl #yandere #yandere imagines #female yandere x reader #female yandere x y/n #The Secret Admirer #slight retread of her bit of the yandere girls post #now with more backstory #part 2 will be here before long #it was actually written first and just needs a little editing #im not up for actually using y/n in the text just yet #one day i will be so bold #but that day is not today #maybe in Part 2

98 notes · View notes