#but the disappointment and sadness in Ted's face is too much

[thetarttfuldickhead]

A Jamie-centric pre-OT3 Christmas story told in 25 short chapters.

Masterpost / AO3

14.

Another fucking draw. At least they’d actually scored in this one (Obisanya 26, Tartt 74), but what good was that when they let the other team net the ball just as many times? Jamie stared morosely at his Lynx collection, trying to muster the energy to change out of his kit. He was sweaty, his hair was a mess, and his side ached dully from a nasty tackle near the final whistle; taking a shower would be heaven. But he was too tired to move.

It wasn’t so much the game that left him exhausted, even though it sure took its physical toll. The past ten days had been a mad flurry of setting up surprise after surprise for Roy, and that had involved more gift hunting, eavesdropping and secret sneaking around than Jamie had ever thought he’d get up to. Between that and football and team Christmas bonding there’d barely been time for sleeping and eating.

And after all that, he still hadn’t called Mummy. He’d tried to, every single night, but he just. couldn’t. do. it. Apparently his efforts still weren’t up to scratch, which was baffling, to be honest: how fucking sad was Roy that not even the truly fanastic stuff Jamie had pulled for him had made him happy? Christmas was only days away, and Jamie was running out of both ideas and time. Could he get Sade to actually write Roy a song… ? Might be too much, though, even if he managed to figure out how to sort it. It’d give the bugger a heart attack or something, and that would make Keeley sad and probably not count as him doing a nice thing, even if it’d be dead unfair of the universe to blame him for Roy being a frail old man.

Perhaps he could invite Dani out for another brainstorming session; it had worked a treat last time. Jamie was pretty sure that Roy had appreciated his gifts and gestures, from what peeks he’d managed to sneak of the man. Just not appreciated them enough, apparently.

It also seemed like maybe Roy was getting a tiny bit suspicious. Yesterday, he’d kept turning his head every this way and that, and sometimes stopping dead in the street and whirling around, looking a little wild-eyed. At one point Jamie had had to dive behind a couple of large rubbish bins to avoid detection. That was a pair of perfectly ripped trousers he’d never wear again.

Fuck, but he wished that—

“Jamie, are you feeling well?”

Jamie turned to look at Sam, who had stopped by his cubby, already changed and with a concerned pinch to his kind face. He looked just slightly, slightly hesitant, as if he wasn’t sure if his question would yield an answer or something sharp and snide. Jamie made an effort to smile. “Yeah, bruv, I’m sound. Just, you know, tired of not winning.

“It is disappointing. But, thanks to you it was a draw instead of a loss. And it was a very nice goal too.”

At the praise, Jamie felt his smile grow easier, more sincere. It had been a very nice goal, hadn’t it? Good of Sam to notice. 

“Yeah, yeah, thanks mate. And yours were great too, you know?” he added, remembering what Dr. Sharon had said about how acknowledging other people’s accomplishments did not diminsh Jamie’s own.

The way Sam’s lips curled into a wide grin, mirroring Jamie’s own, and the way the sight of it made Jamie feel warm had him thinking she was onto something there.

“Thanks, Jamie,” Sam said simply, and gave him a friendly nod before walking back to his own cubby.

Still smiling, Jamie finally began to undress.

---

Once he was showered and changed and Ted had somehow talked them all into feeling determined and hopeful rather than dejected, Jamie hefted his bag and headed for the door. On his way out he passed by Keeley and Rebecca Welton, offering a smile to the former and a polite nod to the latter.

Keeley lit up when she saw him (and fuck, but that still did things to him, didn’t it?). “Hi, Jamie,” she said. “Listen, I was wondering if you could stop by my place tomorrow? I wanted to talk to you about some new tweaks to your brand, now that you’re playing again?”

Jamie perked right up at that. Talking to Keeley and discussing his brand? Fucking brilliant. Much better than spending another day trying to figure out what would possible make Roy Kent happy enough to appease the universe into letting Jamie call his mum.

He’d been working hard. He deserved a little break. Besides, hanging out with Keeley at her place might well yield some new Roy related ideas.

“Yeah, mint, yeah,” he said. Then a thought occurred to him and he frowned. “Or, actually, no, I can’t. The team’s doing a day trip Winchester Christmas Market after our recovery sessions. Sorry.”

He was, too. As much as he was growing to appreciate the lads and was looking forward to the trip, he’d rather spend some time with Keeley (and his brand was in sore need of some brushing up, ‘cause people were still being cunts and hung up about him walking out on City and Amy and stupid shit like that).

“Oh.” Keeley looked disappointed, which cheered him a little. “Tuesday?” she suggested.

“Sure, yeah. I mean, I’ve got training, but I could drop by after? Unless you wanna… “ He nodded towards her closed office door.

“No! I mean… No. There’s been… there’s an issue with the ventilation, yeah, it smells awful in there. Like dying animals and farts and baby vomit. Blegh. You don’t wanna go in there.”

Uh, yeah, no thank you, he sure as hell did not. Jamie made a face. “Yeah, all right,” he said. “I’ll just come by yours then?”

She nodded, looking relieved. “Great! Thank you, Jamie!”

“You’re all right.” He gave her another smile, Rebecca another nod (and noted that she for some reason seemed like she was struggling not to either roll her eyers or laugh, which was kind of rude, considering how hard Keeley worked for her and all, and she really should get Keeley’s office sorted), before heading out to his car.

So. Fun trip with the boys tomorrow – maybe he’d find something nice for Mummy and for Roy at the Christmas market – and then hanging out with Keeley the day after. So-so playing and his mummy issues aside, life wasn't so bad.

#jamie's christmas carol #fic #my stuff #keeley jones

[gffa]

Buncha scattered thoughts about trying out some different TV shows and whether or not I’d recommend them so far: - The Last of Us, with only a basic understanding of the plot of the games, I’m otherwise going in basically blind on this one and I’ve been enjoying the HBO adaptation a ton so far!  Very much at the top of the “if you’re looking for a show to binge and don’t mind horror and sad stories, TO WATCH” list!  The chemistry of the characters and the stunning scenery and well-paced scenes makes it thoroughly watchable. - Shrinking, I’ll give pretty much anything Bill Lawrence produces a shot (Scrubs, Cougar Town, Ted Lasso) and I’m charmed from the first episode.  You’ll always get fun banter and funny dialogue, but I’m already engaged with the characters because he has a way of writing snarky characters who still have a ton of heart.  The therapist’s hot mess of a life is offset by how genuinely he cares about his patients, openly and honestly.  I am a sucker for people who banter but aren’t afraid to put their heart on their sleeve. - The Light in the Hall, which I can’t talk about without spoiling the ending, but I wound up disappointed by this one.  The story is fairly predictable and the acting is top-notch, but I was frustrated by [redacted] being the only [redacted] and of course they end up being the murderer, all in service of making a woobie out of the [redacted].  It left a bad taste in what was otherwise a strong show. - Poker Face, I am not Rian Johnson’s biggest fan, but I like his work a lot more when he seems to be writing a love letter to a genre that he wants to pay homage to, to build a tribute to it, rather than subvert it.  I like that it’s quirky but keeps a lid on the amount of it, it feels like it’s having fun with the concept of this version of Columbo, and it knows that you’re here to watch Natasha Lyonne do her thing and it loves watching Natasha Lyonne do her thing, too. - His Dark Materials, which I love the adaptation, having never read the books it still feels like you can tell they were adapted with love and it works as a coherent storyline.  The actors are incredible, each of them are great on their own, but then having fantastic chemistry with each other, and I’m very taken with the themes of the story, around religion and knowledge and free will and independent thought.  Sprinkle in that the main character gets to be an angry, often messy, often very loud about her feelings character, and I’m in. - The Price of Glee, I went into this one hoping that it would at least be something of a tell-all about what went on behind the scenes, because I bet that would be fucking wild, given what we already know.  But after the first episode and skimming the later ones, it seems to be focused more on (as the title suggests) how much it cost these people to be part of it.  Which, you know, fair.  But not quite what I was looking for, so I’ve set it aside for now. - The Owl House, 10/10 no notes.  It’s been so satisfying to see a lot of character arcs come to fruition, even if the season has been massively truncated.  Luz’s struggle between which world she wants to stay in, the maturation of her relationship with Amity, the reconnection with her mother, all of that is fantastic.  The acknowledgement of Willow’s feelings and the support she gets from her friends, Hunter’s willingness to open up about his own feelings, also so much good.  Worldbuilding bits and pieces with the Collector and that I’m already engaged with wanting that poor kid to have better influences, yeah, that’s the stuff. - Three Pines, which I mostly picked up because I like Alfred Molina and he is indeed very charismatic and warm in this series, which has some pretty scenery and a very cozy feeling.  I’ve never read the books this is based on, but it feels like the show very much knew that it wanted to be a charming little murder mystery series with a connective throughline and it was exactly that.  I wouldn’t call it light-hearted, it has some lovely emotional weight, it has characters who very openly care about others, but I would still say it was a very warm show. - Avenue 5, which got off to a bit of a rocky start in its second season for me, but by the end of it, I was enjoying the absolute flaming trainwreck the whole thing is and how, when you lean into the chaos along with the show, it’s pretty hilarious.  I love the characters and I want to know where it’s going from here, I’m going to be so pissed if HBO doesn’t renew it for a third season. - The Sex Lives of College Girls, I enjoyed the first season of the show enough to binge the whole thing and I liked the girls’ friendships with each other and it felt like there was a lot of heart here.  I don’t know what happened with the second season, if it’s me or the show but nothing felt like it was clicking anymore and I finally had to drop it.  First season is adorable, totally worth watching as a stand-alone show!  Second season, idk maybe others liked it more than I did! - Criminal Mind Evolution, I was willing to pick this show back up again because I still have fondness for the actors and the characters, but after two episodes I had to rage quit.  The writing just isn’t working for me, its leaning into everything I grew to be frustrated with or outright hate about the original and even a character like Garcia’s warmth feels forced and unearned.  Dropped and will not be going back.

#lumi.txt

[kentray]

Yet another theory: Roy/Keeley break-up

Near the end of S2 there were theories on Reddit that Keeley might be pregnant. They died down but I think that it might have been the case. So my theory is, I think a miscarriage or abortion may have caused Roy & Keeley’s break up. Again, it's long... so bear with me. And as always, this is just a theory because I felt there was more to the break-up and the show purposefully wants to keep us in the dark only for a major reveal later.

Keeley wasn’t shown drinking past S2E7 – yes, she had drinks in her hand & spoke of them, but she never actually drank – a kind of unwritten rule in tv with a pregnant woman. Nor did she smoke. (S1E10, 11, 12)

S1E10 Keeley’s behaviour at the funeral was erratic and a bit disrespectful of the environment but I chalked it up with her being emotional about death but what if her hormones were out of whack? She didn't know she was pregnant yet or she’d just realized?

She talked about wanting people to be nourished by the fruit from her tree – that’s a very allegorical parallel to pregnancy.

If Roy didn't know about the pregnancy until after the fact (miscarriage or abortion), the line in the funeral episode "I didn't know about the fucking child" was foreshadowing.

She looked directly at Roy when the reverend spoke about Rebecca’s father being a devoted husband and father.

She also did not do her PR duty with Rebecca. She needed to properly warn her of the repercussions of Rebecca’s relationship with Sam. I mean think of how aware Keeley was about that with those photos of her and Ted in S1 when she was dating Jamie. But if she had a pregnancy on her mind? Was she distracted?

In S1E12, having this huge opportunity to start her own company and being given the news via email? Is that realistic? Did she question any of this? Due diligence? Again, if she wasn’t thinking straight, if she had lots on her mind, it would all seem like too much at one time.

When Roy wanted to open the champagne in S2E12, she said, "I thought we wanted to save this for something really, really special?" What's more special than opening your own company? She then distracted him by proposing sex... avoiding having to drink but not having to say anything about why.

She also was at a crossroads. Her dreams were coming true as her career was soaring. She had the love of her life supporting her - but a baby? That wasn’t in the cards.

And then the trip to Marbella, she couldn’t go away. Fair enough… but encouraging Roy to go alone when he’d just arranged it all for them both? (I do not approve of his sudden surprise trip but that’s separate issue.) Having him away for six weeks would give her time to decide whether to keep the baby or not. She is scared and has never been in a long-term relationship before. Maybe has even dealt with pregnancy scares and been disappointed by partners?

So we get to S3 and they are broken up. She wanted a break, Roy wants a break-up. We know Roy has self-worth issues. He feels he weighs Keeley down. I believe he feels he’ll impact her ability to succeed – he’s got a lot of baggage and Keeley has been more than supportive. It’s unfair for her to have that burden. So that's what we see as his reason.

Fine… but Keeley – why won’t she work at it? Yes, she’s preoccupied but it’s obvious “being busy” is not the reason for the break-up. That’s an excuse. It seems obvious that they are covering with Phoebe and fine... but the carefulness with how they word things sticks out to me.

It’s also obvious Roy wants it to be known that HE is the reason for the break-up but he's still kind to Keeley. It's as if he’s protecting her.

So, what if she miscarried or chose to have an abortion?

We see Keeley as serious and sad at the beginning of S3, and in Episode 2, when Roy gives back her things in a bag at the club, her hair is ragged and she looks unhappy, putting on a brave face.

We then get a scene pointing out that her period is early due to stress. That surprised me. I would have considered Keeley to be a woman on the pill, or even more likely, an IUD. It's not impossible to have an early or late period on the pill but to show that scene? We now know she could get pregnant.

Also for symbolism? The use of the lamb with Keeley's storyline? Lambs represent gentleness, innocence, and purity and babies are often called little lambs. Also, the little lamb pooped over her work, twice, as if to say the lamb (the baby) impacted the quality of her work.

When Roy received all those sympathy well-wishes - what did it look like? Balloons and teddy bears and flowers? Mostly white? It looked like what people give new parents. No wonder Roy was angry. (Poor Trent.)

Her not knowing what CFO means? Not knowing who her VC “boss” was? The person who funded her? Her bad decisions? Even her decision to enter a relationship with Jack? All of this is Keeley regressing. She is new to all this but really not doing herself any favours. She is heartbroken, perhaps suffering from trauma from everything that's happened.

What she does do, is to seek comfort in a woman, rather than a man - and yes, while that provides LGBTQ+ representation, it also protects Keeley from getting pregnant again.

And Roy? What if he didn’t know until after the fact? And if that was the case, I think he would respect her agency. Her body, her choice, but it would indicate to him that she didn’t trust him to talk about it. It would confirm all the self-hatred in his head, the idea that he wasn’t enough, that no one could love him. And above that, if she did miscarry, he would feel immense guilt for causing her pain and sadness, especially as she was at an exciting time in her life. He would blame himself because Roy blames himself for everything.

Remember in S2E8,he told Phoebe he was afraid of infecting her with the worst parts of him? That is not a man who thinks he would be a good father even though S2 showed the audience why Roy would be a good father. Fatherhood is a major theme in the story. I thought it was foreshadowing at the time, perhaps it was.

Also, what if post-miscarriage/abortion Keeley had regrets? What if she talks about wanting to be a mother? This would also encourage Roy to bow out, because if she does eventually want a child, she should be with someone who is worthy of being a father. He likely might not word it that way - he might just be firm in the idea that he doesn't want to be a father.

Keeley would be devastated but would also respect Roy’s decision. She doesn’t have the energy to fight. She might think she's the one who has hurt him and he thinks he’s doing the right thing even if it’s hurting her.

I actually think Rebecca would know what happened and even would respect Roy for walking away if he doesn't want to be a father, because Rupert didn’t give her that choice. Which then would have led her to think of trying to be a mother again. And I noticed Rebecca didn't seem to be angry with Roy for breaking off with Keeley and hurting her, just frustrated. She understood and then she got after him to get a move on.

Now here we are. Roy and Keeley are both a mess. They are both regressing to old versions of themselves. Keeley is back to living life superficially and Roy is back to living life full of anger and hostility.

In S1, Keeley mentioned she had abandonment issues. Until Roy most of her relationships have been superficial, never getting close enough to be truly hurt. In S2, it sounded like she didn't have a good relationship with her mum. We never got to see this but perhaps she feared Roy would reject her, which he did.

And then of course Ep 9, ROY'S SPEECH ABOUT A FOOTBALLER'S WIFE MISCARRYING, Roy said, "He didn't tell anyone. He kept it all inside", Keeley gave an almost imperceptible nod and was near tears.

In S2E9, the man many called "Roy on 'Roids" & his sexy partner Mary were expecting a baby. A nod to Roy & Keeley? Guess who is at Beard's wedding with a baby on his chest?

When they were finally about to talk about their relationship, it was in Jamie's childhood bedroom... a child's bedroom. Sadly Jamie interrupted.

In S2, Headspace, Roy reads the DaVinci Code & quotes the point where the "old geezer" inflicts wounds on himself for his perceived guilt which is exactly what Roy has done all season because he felt he caused Keeley pain.

I tend to think it was a miscarriage and even the possibility that she talked to Roy about the pregnancy/the options prior to losing the baby, but that's all just guess work at this point.

While I could accept this as a reason, I still think they’ve missed the mark on storytelling by keeping it a mystery. It’s not fair to the viewers who have been on this journey and waited for 500+ days between seasons only to be left with no answers. It's been a really sad season if you love the Roy & Keeley love story.

#keeley jones #roy kent #roykeeley #ted lasso theory #ted lasso spoilers #royxkeeley #pregnancy storyline #roy and keeley #reeley #roy x keeley #roy kent keeley jones #keeley x roy #keeley jones independent woman #keeley/roy #rebecca welton #relationship trauma #PTSD #hidden storyline

[aelsie]

Welcome to my Ted Talk. Topic of the Day: Darklina Season 2 👀😬😱

Spoilers! 🚨

I had very low standards for this season when it came to Darklina because I’ve read the entire Grishaverse and well….it was rough when it came to that ship. I was a little disappointed that they took out certain moments, lines and points from the books. They made up for it with some replacement scenes but most of all with that ENDING! Oof, the ending gave way more open doors than I expected!

I always knew that they wouldn’t end up together. My beloved Darklina ship was a Shakespearean tragedy from the beginning. And yet I was looking forward to watching one half of my ship kill the other half of my ship. What a very strange ship! And yet I rode it happily! The connection they had throughout the season was powerful, the strange trust Alina and the Darkling had, the magnetism, the undeniable pull between two people who really had no other equal but each other and in so many ways made the other their only refuge. It was as if they were fighting on stage but behind the curtains they were confiding in each other, no matter how angry they were, conversations between two kindred souls, or two people who KNEW that no one else could truly understand them but the other. A literal one of a kind connection.

Throughout the season, the way he talks about their powers and the darkness, he’s warning her, cautioning her about the dangers of it, and all the terrible things that come with it. He also flat out tells her that with him gone the nichevoya will hunt her, but she takes it as a threat instead of a warning. A very Darkling thing to do btw. In the end, he’s saying, be careful because you’ll end up like me and it’s not pretty, you’ll lose yourself and will lead an empty life. I wouldn’t want that to happen to you. When the nichevoya goes to attack her, he yells for it to leave her alone and boy, that just proves that he still has a kernel of humanity and that he does indeed hold affection (maybe love or as much as he can love) for Alina. And he doesn’t want her to end up in the place he has—filled with pain, rage, resentment, loneliness, heartbreak, loss of humanity and quite possibly no salvation.

One of the surprisingly emotional moments was when he talks about hope and there’s a flashback to their first kiss. He basically admits that when she came into his life, he started believing that he could have some salvation, he started having HOPE, hope in controlling the literal demons and darkness in him, in ultimately saving HIMSELF. The Darkling remains nameless in the books and he only reveals his name to Alina about 2/3 of the way in book 3 during a *cough* intimate scene. For the show Ben said in an interview that his incredibly vulnerable admittance of finding hope when Alina came into his life was their replacement scene for that scene. I think that just might be more impactful.

As The Darkling dies, he looks up at her and says “Blue skies. My little saint.” This is the one scene I wish they kept from the book. Alina was way more emotional about his death in the book, she cries and holds his hand as he’s dying. In the show, you can see a flicker of empathy and sadness on Alina’s face. It’s there but not enough in my opinion. Either way, it still tells us that now more than ever, after everything this season, she understands him and knows him even better. She has seen and been around that darkness well enough. Maybe a little too well, as we see in the end. She grants him his final wish which is to make sure there is nothing left of him (but not really, his hand is still out there, ooooh!) His funeral was strangely sad when technically he is the villain. He’s a fantastically complex villain.

Also, boy am I glad that she chose not to be with Mal and decided to stay in the palace with Nikolai because that means no losing her powers and no Malina (for now). Alina is tenfold better in the show than the books just for that and that crown looks GOOD on Alina. I do want my Zoyalai eventually. And we see flickers of that when Zoya looks at Nikolai, interested. I do think that they will be endgame at the end of the day. Which begs the question, what about Alina?

The show ends with Alina using the shadow cut and her looking shocked and then scarily pleased with herself. The darkness has creeped into her. Exactly what Aleksander warned her about and didn’t want to happen to her. He will come back (which does happen in the books, so don’t fail me Netflix 😭) and I wonder if he might play a role in getting rid of that darkness within her, an ultimate show of how he cares for her. Wouldn’t that be a crazy “redemption” arc? He does tell her in the show “let me be your monster” and “let me carry the hatred of the world” as if he’s saying I’ll carry the darkness and you the light and together we’ll balance out and create peace. At least, that’s what’s going on in his head. Either way, those were really heavy lines to say to Alina. In the books, we do see him make a sacrifice for Ravka, stopping the Fold growing again by willingly trapping himself into a tree—literally being a monster holding back the bad things in the world. Maybe he'll do some redemptive thing for Alina also. We never did see his body disintegrate in that last scene. Also, Zoya was shooing a bee off of her--bees being the sign of Sankta Elizaveta aka one of the Saints who resurrects The Darkling in KoS. Maybe Alina will suffer under the weight of the darkness and who knows maybe Alina will find some strange relief to see him again. The one other person who not only understands but KNOWS. At this point, I expect that they will become even more like equals and will meet halfway. Now that Alina has slowly, subtly but surely walked a similar path to darkness—use of manipulation, harsh words about taking everything away, becoming colder, leading the second army, working as right hand to a king, saving a loved one with merzost, and finally, gaining shadow powers.

It’s the best we could realistically ask for in this ship. Because yes, in many ways, they do have a romance—twisted, toxic, gruesome, and tragic as it is but it’s there in my opinion. It’s an undeniable connection, a temptation that can’t be taken away, and what happened between them is the definition of changing someone’s life completely. Even on Alina’s end when she talks about how he was the first to show her her true powers, her value, how she was meant for more. Of course Baghra says that those still remain true regardless of him but you know that as Alina is saying it a part of her still feels so betrayed and so hurt. Because she did feel something for him once and had HOPED for something more with him, even Baghra tells Aleksander that there was a time when he could have earned Alina’s love. At the end of the day, it’s a way more compelling pairing BECAUSE of its complications and tragedy.

I never imagined Alina to take a dark turn, that’s a ballsy but fantastic move for the writers but I am SO here for it. It was always a pipe dream for some Darklina shippers. But...well, here we are! It basically happened! She might not have joined the Darkling's dark side, but she's basically gotten her own dark side now. It makes her more interesting and complex and opens the door for more darklina. Maybe not endgame Darklina but just more of their angst and drama. I remain a darklina fan even if their romance is terrible and tragic but their pairing is so messy, complex, poetic and has so many layers. Let’s suffer with this ship together my friends 😈🥹

With that, can we have season 3 now PLEASE?

PS. The Darkling is such a simp, even when she's destroying the Fold, he looks around with amazement and says "extraordinary" as if he's so proud of her. He's like biiiish that's mah wife-y, she's about to destroy my creation AND me because she's a badass. You go wife-y!

#Jessie and Ben’s chemistry was palpable this season #even just standing in front of each other the tension is peak #darklina #pro darklina #alina starkov #the darkling #shadow and bone #aleksander kirigan #general kirigan #shadow summoner #sun summoner #aleksander morozova #shadow and bone spoilers #shadow and bone season two spoilers #king of scars duology

[hiddenwashington]

                                       we are the april fools

welcome to the brain cell of the admin team working! we love a good bit so, here is a compilation of our bullshit for your memeing pleasure. enjoy!

**tw for nsfw, drug mention, alcohol mention, swearing

‘ fuck off you fucking gremlin ’

‘ mister mistoffelees is my cat boyfriend ’

‘ one is a kink, one is a crime ’

‘ i live for chaos you gotta feed me ’

‘ i’ll continue being an asshole for your amusement ’

‘ i’m ready, bring on the anxiety ’

‘ hey bro, what the fuck ’

‘ we’ll scar ourselves for valentines day ’

‘ and then she wrote me a novel about his cocaine addiction ’

‘ sponsored by ritz cheese crackers, absolute shit ’

‘ you have no legacy, your legacy is to be disappointed all the time ’

‘ you’re like some sad soccer mom that came for the wine instead of your kids soccer game ’

‘ karen can choke i would never forget the sangria ’

‘ your moms dead, i’m your problem now ’

‘ it is i, the mullet of your dreams ’

‘ you cannot mention pornhub! this is why you’re not hr ’

‘ i’m on the clock to knock your lights out ’

‘ i’m livin la tiddy loca ’

‘ she was hot, i don’t know what to tell you ’

‘ righting the world and the economy one karen at a time ’

‘ you can fight my brain and my anxiety sis we’re having ✨a terrible time✨ ’

‘ i’m on it drag that bitch to denny’s i’ll take her ass out ’

‘ can god stop vibe checking me ’

‘ today i learned that cocaine could be an antidepressant if the government weren’t cowards ’

‘ i had five shots of espresso, even god can’t stop me ’

‘ ted bundy is up first i will square up ’

‘ one day i will have the pleasure of going to hell and murdering freud ’

‘ i will not face consequences for my actions. you can not make me ’

‘ i can accept that i have a flaw or two. that’s it though, just two ’

‘ i know you try very hard, but you are very stupid ’

‘ let’s go straight, a thing we’ve never said before in this groupchat ’

‘ you better be ready to sleep with moth man - hi dad! ’

‘ that’s like the saddest uwu i’ve heard in my life ’

‘ i just want the thrill of rejecting a god ’

‘ you really think you could take on the kool-aid man and take no damage??? ’

‘ i don’t have a foot fetish, i’m just autistic ’

‘ i haven’t even learned multiplication, how am i supposed to know what a pyramid scheme is? ’

‘ do i look sexy while dying? ’

‘ have you been watching too much youtube? ’

‘ fucking ipad kids, man ’

‘ i can be sane about this i promise but not today ’

‘ i’m a catch and i can also sleep with a younger man ’

‘ how do you milk an oat ’

‘ fuck my dad ’

‘ sometimes you just need to start swinging ’

‘ i just watched a cat girl walk out of thin air in a starbucks ’

‘ isn’t that that furry thing people are into ’

‘ i’m gonna go on The Google and see if i can figure anything out ’

‘ am i high too? ’

‘ fuck off bambi ’

‘ since there was no warning and i make the rules here ’

‘ you’ll go where i say you’ll go ’

‘ does a - mother fucker ’

‘ gonna play chase the emo ’

‘ we love biting dilfs….? ’

‘ optimistic nihilism, right? none of us matter ’

‘ it’s kinda cringe to be kidnapped ’

‘ you rolled a 5, stfu this rabbit’s coming to brand you ’

‘ is he immune to KNIVES?? ’

‘ alright – now to kill this dad ’

‘ if you think garfield is going to stand against me in court, you’re out of your fucking mind ’

‘ no offense but you have like no mom vibes ’

‘ i think i got threatened by a furry ’

‘ speak of the cat lady and she shall appear ’

**shotguns frappuccino** ‘ there’s many ways to drink a drink ’

‘ these hands are magic, baby ’

‘ are you saying naruto is jesus?? ’

‘ your pride is going to get us killed ’

‘ you look like you could fit under a bush ’

‘ y’all test me… ’

‘ it’s your reward for being a dumb bitch ’

‘ i am SO GLAD you didn’t get vored by a cloud ’

‘ did you get so high/drunk you circled back to sober? ’

‘ try to crowd surf the third graders! ’

‘ some things are better off unknown , the phrase will haunt me but… ’

‘ we’ve summoned satanic tennessee ’

‘ what’s a chakra? i didn’t bring anything with me ’

‘ hey lady, did you give me crack ? ’

‘ there are no nutrients in my body, only spite! ’

‘ i’m here to be fun and cute! not smart! ’ 

‘ i don’t joke about setting timers ’

‘ eggs aren’t meat... yet ’

‘ this is being run by a bisexual maniac ’

‘ maybe nessie’s lonely, maybe nessie needs to get laid! ’

‘ biting is my kink ‘

‘ don’t worry, i will slowly eat away at you until you are a husk of a person ’

#meme day #long post tw #featuring the hits from two dnd campaigns and nightmare comments in the admin discord

[viddo3k]

Okay so... I watched Sonic Prime, the first season. And I'll have to say, i was (almost) pleasantly surprised. (Spoilers for Season 1 i guess?)

Before watching it, i remember what my friend told me, to watch this show without the mindset of a Sonic fan, or something like that.

I didn't listen and i regret it BUT it ended up not being as bad as i thought.

Season 1 was decently quick to watch, the 8 episodes were roughly 25 minutes long so i easily got through all of it in one go; something I haven't done in a looong while 💔

The pacing seemed pretty fine to me, most of the time, it had decent set-up, get introduced to familiar faces, get to see the classic Sonic v Robotnik fight, you know, the good stuff, and all seems well. Then the Paradox Prism Shatter happens and all goes to shit, both in and for the show.

I think they had lots of cool stuff they could work with; the Sonic franchise is filled to the brim with lots of events that could be twisted around to create alternative realities that could've been interesting! Problem is, they did exactly not that, or at least they didn't for the Jungle and the Pirate dimensions.

They have this Dimension where you have an almost Sonic Forces setting; Robotnik controls an entire city, everyone is sad, everything is robotic, and Sonic is uh... Not gone, per se? He was completely non-existent, so It's more or less the same. You also have a group of rebels too, commanded by Rouge (known as Rebel) and Knuckles (known as Knux. No I'm not kidding), so it really seems like a Sonic Forces' premise rehash, which I was excited about.

As a matter of fact, this New Yoke City dimension is actually pretty good, and it had some cool stuff going on around it. For one, Robotnik and his other 4 alter egos managed to capture a Shard of the Paradox Prism and use it as an energy source, and Sonic wants to get them Shards to fix the Prism, once he's realized his mistake, that of breaking it.

When Sonic goes around the dimensions, Nine (Tails) gets the Shard for himself and starts going around places and/or dimensions to find one most suitable for him, and he did, in the form of The Grim (as he calls it), all while the Resistance is managing to rally up against the 5 Robotniks.

I found this whole thing happening pretty damn cool, which is a shame because the other dimension are pretty disappointing by comparison.

This show is targeted towards children and it shows in the Jungle and Pirate worlds. I honestly think that it was borderline lazy, they literally just made everyone a pirate or a monkey, and have the most basic ass conflicts going on.

Like, in the Jungle episodes, Knuckles, Rouge, Big?? And Tails were all thrown on top of big big trees because Amy thought they were disrespecting and destroying the forest (they were), then at the end Sonic just gets them to do a quick Ted talk and look at that, all the problems are suddenly gone. A shame because it also had cool ideas, that of gigant flickies and the Shards having specific powers tied to the dimensions they're in (the Jungle Shard can grow trees at light speed). And God forbid they don't show you a flashback at least 20 times.

Then the Pirate episodes are just Knuckles having ptsd after he failed to grab the Shard for himself and his old crew, but then Sonic's all like "dude you could become famous" and suddenly he wants it again, and the funniest thing is that he actually gets it; much to Sonic and New Yoke City's Amy's dismay (she's evil over there). Unfortunately this world's Shard doesn't have any specific power, excluding for being exceptionally bright but every Shard glows anyway.

It kinda just boggles me how they went for such boring alternate world ideas when they had so much potential to work with, and i just think it's kinda lame, especially because the only actual location ever used is Green Hill Zone, It's like Sonic Generations all over again!

It's also worth noting that Sonic in this show is nothing like ever seen in the franchise: He's an actual idiot.

It's almost as though he's never had any coherent thought, since he struggles to make the easiest of connections throughout the show, and he's also kind of annoying at some points, ESPECIALLY in episode 2, good lord. I can hardly believe this is the same Sonic that went through Sonic Forces and/or the Metal Virus, and yet it is and it's terrible.

On a more positive note, this show looks pretty damn good, the animation is just on point, on par or even better than Sonic Boom's, which had great animation of its own; this goes to show just how much emotion can the Sonic cast portray simply via well animated gestures and such. They also had pretty well animated action scenes, like the Shadow v Sonic fight, or the Big Flicky chases. The environments themselves look pretty good too, especially NYC but that's probably just because I'm very emo.

I also liked the OST a bunch, i liked the almost underground mixed with Hip-hop influence the soundtrack had in NYC, and the Pirate/Jungle themed uh... Hip-hop tracks it had; yeah i think the Prime composers liked Hip-hop, It's like listening to Linkin Park, but i think that's cool, I'd like to see more of it in the Sonic Franchise.

Then there's the voice acting and like... I don't know about it. The cast just sound really weird for some reason, like the vas we're trying to do playful impressions of the game vas, mind you I didn't check who's voicing who so yeahh lol.

Well, i guess that's it really. What did i think about Sonic Prime's Season 1?

It's... Fine. Nothing outrageously bad and nothing amazingly good, just a Sonic themed kids show that has a surprising amount of potential left untouched by the authors, albeit with great animation and backing music, which isn't anything new to Sonic but yeah, still worth noting.

I'm hopeful for Season 2 actually, I've been told it's better than Season 1 so i have relatively high hopes for it, and I'll be definitely watching it soon and talk about it, so yeah, wait for it. All i hope is that they use more interesting ideas for alternative universes other than "Knuckles is a lame ass Pirate now".

#Sonic #sonic prime

[eddievedders]

GET IN LOSER, WE'RE GOING TO F*CKING MURDER NATHAN SHELLEY!

#Ted Lasso #tedlassoedit #tedlassogif #bbelcher #dailyflicks #usernessa #userlili #userkk #cindy-clawford #usernessie #Jason Sudeikis #why is tumblr being a d*ck right now? #listen i am not okay #i'm so angry at Nathan #this has Rupert's hand all over I can feel it #props to Trent for telling Ted who the source was tho #but the disappointment and sadness in Ted's face is too much #after everything they went through #this is the 3rd time i'm trying to post this pls tumblr let me #my stuff #mine: believe #ted lasso spoilers

[arentyouadorable]

Bloody Postcards

for the Discord 1p4a “Travel”

The first postcard, at the top of the board, is a collection of four photos. Three of them are landmarks, a picture of the Port of Liverpool, the Royal Liver Building, the largest Anglican Cathedral in Europe and the last one, a famous statue of Liverpool's most famous band: The Beatles.

Rebecca unpins the postcard, flips it in her hands, finds her neat writing at the back.

Ted keeps staring at me so I gourds I have to write something. He wants to send this bloody postcard so that we find it when we get home. So here I am. 200 miles from home, I am writing something for us to find when we get home. Rebecca&Ted

She recalls Ted's laughter when they entered her home, their home, how he had turned the postcard in his fingers, tracing the single words, the way she had spelled his name right next to hers.

One week later he had showed up with a cork board and some colorful pins.

“For the postcards.” He had explained.

And Rebecca had sighed, knowing the postcard thing wasn't going to be a one time thing.

The second postcard, top right, is a picture of Union Station. Huge block yellow letters with a thick black outline spell Greetings From Kansas City in the center, covering half of the image. Rebecca remembers the text she had written on the backside by heart. She takes it anyway.

Another trip, another bloody postcard. In case it wasn't clear enough, we were in Kansas. Ted is pretending not to look at me, but I know you are, you little minx. I'm wasting so much time writing this, there'll be no time left for kisses. I'm furious. Rebecca&Ted

With a small smile, Rebecca puts the postcard back. Memories of their first trip to Kansas crowd her mind and there had, indeed, been time left for kisses.The thought makes her heart flutter.

The next postcard doesn't have a city name, just a self explanatory landmark: the Tour Eiffel. It had been their first Valentine's Day and Ted, romantic, sap Ted, had organized them a short trip in the city of love.

“I've never been.” He had explained when Rebecca had made a face at the insufferable cliche. “I thought, what better time to go than Valentine's Day?” He had kissed her nose, grabbed her hand. “And what better company than my soulmate?”

And how could Rebecca resist that? Behind the postcard, just some rushed words:

Kisses from Paris

Rebecca&Ted

The disappointed look on Ted's face when they had gotten home and found the postcard fills her with sadness even years later

Right beside the Paris postcard is one from another European capital. A collage of smaller pictures featuring the Brandenburger Gate, the Dome and random pieces of the Wall. Rebecca smiles at the memory of their time in Berlin, so gray and so rainy they spent most of the time tucked away in little bars and pubs.

Hello postcard, my old friend. Once again, I am putting a little bit more effort in this. Ted was so disappointed after Paris, he almost didn't want to send anything. So I'm really trying. Hi Ted. You are handsome, I love you. Rebecca (&Ted)

The smile on Ted's lips when the postman had delivered the postcard, how he had rushed into the kitchen, beaming, how tightly he had hugged her to his chest, lovingly.

“I love you too.” He had whispered. “Let's travel more in the summer.”

The colors of the next postcards are Rebecca's favourite. Pink flowers, white houses and blue sky. Rebecca turns it and looks at the childish handwriting, the little drawing of a cat in the top corner, next to the stamp.

Dad, Rebecca and I are in Greece and it is awesome. The whea weather is great and I don’t want to go home. Rebecca says she stinks like garlic all the time and Dad always kisses her. There is cats everywhere and I could pet one, today. Best vacation ever! Henry, Rebecca & Ted

Their time in Greece had been wonderful. The early mornings on the beach, the long dips in the crystalline waters, Henry's enthusiasm to try out all water sports. Years later, she can still hear Ted's laughter when she fell from the kite surf, remembers his screams when she pushed him down with her. She still feels his hands on her sun-kissed skin, still tastes the salt on his chin and smells the summer breeze in their hotel room.

Right next to it, a postcard from another island. When Ted had proposed, it had taken Keeley one week to organize the perfect hen do for Rebecca. That's how Rebecca had ended up in Fuerteventura with Keeley and Sassy, both her best friends pushing spanish men and colorful cocktails in her direction.

My dear love, I miss you terribly. Keeley keeps making me drink, says it's my last trip as a single woman and that I should enjoy it. I do, but I wish you were here with me. Which, I know, it's not the point of a hen bachelorette. Can't wait to marry you. R.

Reading over the text, Rebecca blushes slightly, incredibly embarrassed of how romantic and unbearable Ted has made her through the years.

The next postcard is a perfect representation of this. Rebecca moves aside the postcard from Greece, reminding herself she should hang it better so that it doesn't cover the others. Another day, maybe. She looks at the white sand, the blue sea, the clear sky. The letters in the middle spell Mexico, two palms in the background.

This is the first postcard as Mr. and Mrs. Welton-Lasso. I still hate them. There is no point, we are taking so many pictures. Mexico is dreamy. Perfect place for the perfect honeymoon. With the perfect man. Rebecca & Ted Welton-Lasso

Her gaze lingers on the names and on the address line, now featuring her second Surname. Welton-Lasso. It feels right.

Rebecca hangs the postcard back in place and finally takes the most recent one from the pile of mail on the counter. She looks at the Chureito Temple and Mount Fuji in the background, already missing Japan and its gorgeous nature, the busy cities, the tasty foods.

Coming up behind her, Ted hugs her waist and peeks over her shoulder.

When he sees the postcard, Ted widens his eyes. “What? It's here already? No way!”

“We've been gone for a while.” Rebecca argues, moving to take a free pin and hanging the postcard in the bottom corner of the cork board.

Before poking a whole through the light carton, though, she turns it around, showing Ted the text.

I guess postcards aren’t that stupid when trying to remember a language

愛してる (Ai shiteru) = I love you (deeply)

好きだ (Suki da) = I like you (not platonic)

大好きだ (Daisuki da) = I really like you (大 big)

Rebecca & Ted Welton-Lasso

She feels Ted smile and hears his approving hum.

“We will need to get a new board. This is full.” Rebecca points out, finally hanging the postcard.

Brushing his nose against her neck he squeezes her closer.

“I thought you hated them.”

“What can I say, Coach. You changed me.”

#ted lasso #Ted Lasso fic #Tedbecca #1p4a #digital art #silly #rebecca #rebecca welton

[kaunis-sielu]

A Favor

“Auntie!” Anya says the second you answer your phone, “I need your help!”

“What’s wrong?” You’d learned quickly that her version of an emergency and yours were very different.

“My principal wants to talk to my parents!”

“Why?”

“Because I’m sick of Ted Cramer being a bully so I punched him.”

“Okay, so why are you calling me?”

“My parents are out on a mission!”

“Oh.” Keeping who Anya’s parents are a secret is the only thing keeping her in normal school, which was something both agents had wanted for their daughter. “I’ll grab one of your uncles and come in.”

“Not uncle Bucky okay?”

“Why not?”

“Um, last time he was here the principal called him a terror or something and uncle Bucky got really sad.”

“Okay, not Bucky. Are you in the office now honey?”

“Yeah.”

“Tell the principal we’ll be there soon.”

“Um, could you just say you’re my parents? They haven’t met them and you don’t travel as much as my parents do, and you look a lot like me. Since you work behind the scenes people won’t know.”

“I don’t know if that’s a good idea.”

“Please!” She begs, “otherwise they’re just gonna demand my parents come in and then they’re gonna be recognized and I’ll have to leave all my friends!” She sounds so upset that you cave,

“Okay fine.”

“Thank you! Okay I gotta go, I’ll see you soon.”

“See you soon honey.” You hang up then and grab your purse to head out and find one of the boys. You know that Bucky, Steve, Scott and Bruce are all home. Bucky is already out and you don’t think Scott is around enough to be a good Clint substitute. You round one of the corners and nearly crash into Steve, “ah!” You cry startled at the sudden appearance of the Captain.

“Sorry, you okay?” He asks and you nod.

“Hey, I need a favor. Well, actually Anya needs a favor.”

“Is she okay?”

“Yea, just in trouble and needs two people to come to the school.”

“Let me get changed.” You haven’t told him all the information yet but he’s already ready to jump in and help Anya. It’s one of the reasons you adore the man, always ready to help his family.

“Oh, okay I’ll meet you downstairs?” He nods then disappears into his room, you make your way down to one of the cars and as you’re walking up he appears out of the stairwell. He’s in a black shirt, jeans and a grey jacket that either belongs to him, Sam or Bucky, you’ve seen all three men wear it so you’re not sure who it belongs to.

“You want me to drive or do you wanna?” He asks and you pull open the passenger side door in response. “Alright.” He chuckles then gets into the car and heads for Anya’s school.

“So just a heads up she’s asked me to pretend to be Natasha, well actually Natalie Rushman.”

“Why?”

“Nat and Clint are gone so often and since I don’t go out on missions to fight I’m home more than anyone. If Anya needs someone to come in again I’m the best option, I’m not a familiar Avenger. You might be more of a problem, having to explain how I know Captain America.”

“I wear a mask and I’ve got my undercover hat in the back.” He tells you with a grin and you laugh softly.

“Alright, if asked I’ll just say I work for Stark.” You say as he pulls into the parking lot. You climb out of the car and make your way into the school, Steve’s hat is low and somehow it does make him look less like Captain America and more like suburban dad.

“Hi, how can I help you?” The woman sitting at the front desk asks, it was too easy to get into the school, you glance up at Steve and see a small frown on his face. He must be thinking the same thing.

“Hi-“

“Mom! Dad!” Anya cries rushing you and Steve who you share a surprised look with Steve as Anya wraps her arms around your waist and buried her face in your stomach.

“You must be Anya’s parents, I’ll let Principal Decker know you’re here.”

“Thank you.” You tell her and the second she turns away you conjure rings for your and Steve’s fingers.

“Good thinkin’ Sweetheart.” He mutters into your hair.

“Anya, can you tell us a little more about why we were called in here?”

“Ted Cramer wouldn’t leave me alone, he keeps pulling my hair and poking my side and taking my stuff. When I told Mr. Sanders he just told me to ignore it so when Ted grabbed me at recess I punched him.” She looks up at you and that’s when you see the forming bruise around her eye.

“Anya who hit you?” Steve asks, his voice low.

“Nick Sanders. He’s best friends with Ted.”

“So why are you the only one in the office?” You ask, irritation building.

“Because the boys are in with the nurse.” A male voice says and you look up to see a man in a suit standing in front of you. “You must be Mr. and Mrs. Rushman. Principal Decker.” He reaches a hand out for Steve’s and he shakes it coldly.

“Bradley actually, Clark Bradley. My wife kept her last name and since she did all the work we decided to give Anya her last name.”

“My apologies, let’s move this to my office?” He offers and when he goes to touch you to guide you into his office you shy away, Steve wraps a protective arm around your shoulder and when Principal Decker gestures for you to sit Steve stands behind your chair arms folded tightly.

“So you’ve called the other children’s parents?” You ask hoping that he isn’t going to disappoint you but considering he’s already pretty much ignored you you don’t have a whole lot of hope.

“Considering Anya is the one who started the fight we’re a little more concerned with dealing with her behavior first.”

“That’s not the story we heard.” You tell him, glancing over at Anya who looks furious.

“Well, you can’t always believe everything children say.”

“I’m sorry,” Steve says through gritted teeth, “did you just call our daughter a liar?”

“No, no, I just think it’s unwise to just assume you’re getting the whole story.”

“I told them the whole story!”

“Anya if you can’t be respectful then I’m going to ask you to sit in the office.” Principal Decker warns and she folds her arms tightly over her chest, that’s when you notice the rip in her shirt.

“Anya, turn around please.” You tell her and there’s a large tear in the back of her shirt. “Did this happen when you were defending yourself?”

“Yes.”

“Fighting Mrs. Rushman.” Principal Decker interrupts.

“Maybe Anya should go out into the hallway.” Steve growls and you reach behind you to take his hand.

“No,” you counter, “Anya needs to be here to hear this just as much as Principal Decker does.” Your voice is steady, calm, “we have taught Anya to defend herself if someone has touched her when she has asked them not to. Ted Cramer has been an issues all school year, I know because I’ve already emailed Mr. Sanders about it.” Not a lie, as her godmother Natasha has you in their parent email so that you can step in if needed. He opens his mouth to speak but you hold up a hand, “I am not finished.” His mouth closes again, “We won’t be pressing charges against the school for allowing sexual harassment to continue,”

“Sexual harassment? Hold on a minute, they’re 10!”

“He has been pulling her hair, touching her and taking her things all year.”

“Little boys do that when they like little girls! He just has a crush.”

“I see you’re married Principal Decker,” You say gesturing at his ring, “do you poke your wife? Do you pick on her? Take her things? Touch her when she asks you to stop? Because if you do you’re an abuser.” His mouth drops open. “Am I pleased that Anya felt her only course of action was to hit someone to get them to leave her alone? No, I’m furious that her teacher and principal did not listen to her and made her feel like she had to defend herself. Now, how long will she be out of school? My husband and I have jobs to do and frankly you’re an ass.”

“Mrs. Rushman!” He sputters but you stand and hold out a hand for Anya’s.

“How long Principal Decker?”

“Three days.”

“Very well. Anya go get your things.” You turn then and make your way out of the principal’s office Steve behind you.

“Damn Sweetheart.” He mutters and you give his hand a little squeeze. Then he disappears with Anya to gather her things. You head out for the car, leaning against the sleek black thing in the sunshine. Hopefully Clint and Nat won’t be too upset with how you and Steve handled this.

“You! Are you that little Rushman bitch’s mom?”

“Excuse me?” You ask standing up straight as a woman comes storming toward you.

“You heard me. I’m gonna kick your ass.” She takes a swing at you that you see coming a mile away. You duck under her arm, step behind her and throw and elbow into her shoulder blade throwing her off balance. She stumbles forward and you turn to face her again as she whips around.

“My daughter took on three boys and only had a black eye and a ripped shirt. Where do you think she learned to fight?” You ask calmly as the woman rushes you again, you wait and shove her away as you sidestep her again she goes stumbling. Technically it was Natasha but the woman doesn’t need to know that. This time when she rushes you you don’t move, instead you catch her arm and spin her into the car pinning her against the hood.

“Mom?”

“Hi Anya. Clark.”

“Everything alright here Sweetheart?”

“Yea, this is one of the boys mom. She doesn’t seem pleased with how we decided to raise our daughter to not be a passive little thing who lets boys do whatever they want.”

“Fuck you!” The woman screams and you twist her arm painfully.

“Language. You’re at an elementary school.” You say coolly, “Anya honey get in the car please.”

“Anything you need from me Sweetheart?”

“Mm, her husband doesn’t seem too pleased.”

“Let go of my wife you fucking bitch!” He roars his truck squealing to a stop behind your car. He comes bolting out of the car and Steve sighs.

“Honestly. Who do they think taught our kid to kick ass?” Steve grumbles placing himself between you and the large tatted man.

“He’s gonna kill you!” His wife says from where you still have her pinned to your car.

“Friday, are police on their way?” You ask your watch.

“Yes.”

“Thank you.” You say before a loud crash happens behind you.

“I told you to calm down.” Steve says and when you glance behind you you see the other man groaning against his car, a body shaped dent in the hood.

“Mick! Mick! Do something!” The woman yells struggling against you as the police roll up.

“I don’t think Mick is gonna be getting up anytime soon.” Steve says with a sigh. The two police officers come up and she starts screaming about how you’d attacked her. The police take her from you and when they attempt to cuff you too Steve speaks up.

“You probably shouldn’t do that.”

“Are you threatening us sir?”

“No, but she does work for Stark and the whole thing was caught on that camera so maybe check the security camera before you go slapping cuffs on people.”

The two officers call for an ambulance to check on Mick then one goes inside to see what was caught on the camera. When he comes out with a flash drive you’re free to go.

“Thanks Auntie. Thanks uncle Steve.” Anya says from the backseat as Steve pulls out of the school parking lot.

“Don’t thank us quite yet. You still have to tell your parents that you were suspended.” Anya groans loudly before pulling her phone from her pocket. “On speaker please.” You instruct, she’s a tricky thing.

“What? Don’t you trust me?”

“Considering I just played your mom and Steve your dad, no I do not.” She groans but does as you ask and calls her mom on speakerphone.

It’s not the worst conversation and you’re glad that Nat and Clint found that you and Steve played them entertaining. You make sure to tell them that you’ll make sure she gets her schoolwork done before she goes back next week.

“So, I was thinking we deserve ice cream.” Steve says once Anya hangs up with her parents.

“I think that sounds like a great idea. What do you think Anya?”

“I love ice cream. Uncle Steve you should ask Auntie out.”

“Oh, um.” Steve stutters and you glance over your shoulder at Anya.

“Anya you don’t just get to decide things like that for people.”

“But he likes you, and you like him Auntie.” Before you can say anything else Steve chuckles,

“Well she’s not wrong.” Steve says and your gaze whips over to him.

“What?”

“I do like you. So, what do you say? First date at an ice cream parlor with our niece?”

“That sounds perfect.”

#steve rogers #captain america #oneshot #imagine steve rogers #captain america x reader #Steve Rogers x reader #steve rogers one shots #steve rogers oneshot #avengers imagine #avengers one shot #clintasha #clint barton x natasha romanoff

[born-for-eachother]

Hi and welcome to my Ted Talk about Inuyasha’s expressions here!!!!

Kagome’s tearful smile as she looks down at the man she loves is everything to me but there’s just something about Inuyasha’s face that hits me hard with the feels. We see that Inuyasha is not wearing a smile when he initially pulls her out of the well. To be frank, he looks quite sad here. Sad because he’s spent the last three years without the love of his life that lives 500 years into the future. When we learn that Inuyasha had went to the well every t h r e e days, there’s no doubt in my mind that he probably bore a similar expression, perhaps even worse, with more angst. He missed her so damn much, even going as far as telling Miroku that he loves Kagome and telling Kaede that he needs her. But in both instances he also mentions that other people love and need her too. Inuyasha was happy that she was safe on her side of the well, he put her well-being above his own and while he acknowledges these feelings he has toward her, he refuses to act selfishly and think that he’s the only one who matters in her life. As much as Kagome reassured him that he’s worthy and she’ll always stay by his side, I think there’s a part of Inuyasha that thinks that he isn’t worth coming back to; let alone permanently. Despite all this, he *still* waited for her, was holding out hope that she’d return to him and was relying on fate to prove that they really were born to be with one another. Fate obviously didn’t disappoint Inuyasha and low and behold, Kagome returns. His face just screams “Do you know how long I’ve waited for you??” And I think that’s why Kagome apologizes to him and asks if he was waiting. I think his forlon expression spoke his silent question to her. She’s right in front of him, he’s holding her up, holding her hand tightly to his but he’s processing...not quite ready to match the elation that Kagome bares. Still processing the fact that she chose him, and seems to be in awe. He actually doesn’t smile until Miroku, Sango, Shippo and the children show up and again while carrying Kagome on his back. I will never change my mind on the fact that Inuyasha probably had the harder time with the separation; solely based on how he called Kagome ‘his home.’ He was essentially without a home for 3 years and I think that’s another reason why he looks so sad in that picture. It was PAINFUL. This is the same guy who misses Kagome just hours after she goes through the well. His voice even cracks when he asks her what she’s been doing all this time. He just wears a somber look or a sad look the whole time they’re reuniting and it breaks my heart. Sidenote: When he kept going to the well every three days, he did NOT catch her scent. I just think about that and it is even more unfortunate because he was going off of NO leads (but still went) whereas here, he does catch her scent.

#inukag #inuyasha #kagome #MY BABIESSSS

[alaskasmonsters]

(Divine) Dog Cuddles | Fushiguro Megumi

the divine dogs aren't just useful in a fight against curses but also when faced with emotional battles.

pairing: fushiguro megumi x gn!reader

w.c: 1.592

warnings: reader being sad? other than that none

a.n: this one is kinda bad (just lowering the expectations beforehand lol) but i still hope you enjoy it!

There was a soft knock on his door and when Megumi opened it he found you standing in front of it, nervously shifting around as you fiddled with your fingers.

You looked cute, he noticed.

Your hair was disheveled and your face clear of any makeup. You were only wearing an oversized hoodie with, what he recognized to be, pikachu shorts underneath.

Yes, you looked cute.

He opened the door a little wider and you scurried inside, face lighting up when you noticed the divine dogs were already summoned, sitting in front of his bed. As soon as they saw you entering they had started wagging their tails and you smiled happily.

He didn’t know how you had done it, but they liked you. Megumi had never seen the dogs so excited to see someone. They were usually nonchalant, not paying much attention to the general humans as they were fixed on curses. With you there was a difference.

He couldn’t help but ask himself if maybe that was because of him, if they could pick up on his feelings for you and liked you because of that.

You were already kneeling on the floor and eagerly patting the dogs heads and they happily rubbed their heads against your hands, panting.

Megumi sat down on the bed behind you, eyes watching you with fondness as you started talking to his dogs in a baby voice and caressed their fur and scratched behind their ears.

He hadn’t asked why you had wanted him to summon the dogs, he felt it was inappropriate and out of place after you pleaded him over text, the desperation clear as day. The humor all your interactions naturally included had been missing.

You were a person that hardly took anything too serious.

In the beginning he wasn’t too sure what to think about that, or you, for the matter. You’d joke about everything, no situation deemed too serious or professional to not make humorous comments.

That was probably why you got along with Gojou-sensei so well. Both of you were utter crackheads at times, hardly ever responsible with the words you were spouting.

In every area, that was.

When you had started making comments about being attracted to the King of curses, and how absolutely “hot and sexy” his “tatts” were... the bluntness and insolence your words held, it had shocked him.

You were always upfront and naively honest about everything that went on in your head, and despite your silliness he learned to respect that about you.

He also realized rather quickly that your humor was part of your charm and that despite mostly cracking jokes in any given situation you were well aware of the seriousness of the matter. When push came to shove you could put aside your penchant for humor, although never completely and get the work done.

He liked that about you.

Megumi had grown quite fond about all the little behavioral traits you exhibited, that made you you. While in the beginning, when the two of you had just met, he hadn’t thought much of you, now you belonged to the very few people he respected very dearly.

So much, he had reconsidered questioning you about your reasons for wanting to see the divine dogs this late at night, when you messaged him. He had decided he could still ask you when you arrived at his door, but then he’d seen your messy appearance and it had thrown him off guard.

And now you looked so peaceful with your hands buried in his dogs’ fur, that cute little smile on your lips. You were so content in that moment, he’d feel bad if he interrogated you now.

He almost decided to just let you be, lie down and pretend to read a book so he could watch you subtly without it seeming creepy.

Then white dog licked over your cheek and for some reason it seemed to trigger something inside you, because the next moment you suddenly buried your head into the dog’s furry neck, clinging to him tightly.

Megumi watched in surprise.

That was a little too affectionate, even for you.

Only then he noticed your shoulders were shaking with every breath you took and the almost inaudible sound of sniffles that reached his ears. You were crying.

Black dog, who had noticed as well, dropped his head into your lap and although he was a little surprised on how well adjusted they were with the emotional depth of a human, he was feeling a little useless in comparison.

He wanted to help you, as well.

“Y/n...” he started, deciding that if he wanted to comfort you as well it was better to do it now, “are you feeling alright?”

Despite the attempt to keep his voice as calm and monotone as he could, he still feared the question alone had been crossing a line.

One thing he had noticed about you was that although you seemed to be perfectly aligned with your emotions and fine with others knowing about your state of mind at any given moment, considering how naively honest you were, you were actually very private in that matter.

You were often honest about the superficial feelings you experienced in situations and weren’t ashamed of crying when it seemed appropriate, say when dealing with a sad movie (a story about dogs...those seem to always get you), but what you showed to others was only the surface of it all.

You chose carefully what you wanted to share with the rest of them all, and to Megumi’s disappointment you never came to him or anyone else when you were experiencing serious sadness.

Well, you hadn’t been until now.

At his question you had pulled back slightly, just enough so Megumi could hear you, but still too hidden by the fur for him to see your face.

“Yeah, sorry...i...i’m just feeling a little emotional that’s all,” you replied softly, voice strained from tears.

If he was a little closer to you he would have deemed it appropriate to hug you, but he knew that the both of you weren’t on that level, yet.

“May i ask why?”

You chuckled, probably at his choice of words. That was okay, though, it seemed to cheer you up a little.

“Just haven’t been feeling all too great, missing my family a little bit,” you muttered, one hand reaching out to pat the head of the dog lying on your lap as you kissed the top of the white dog’s head.

Megumi hummed, encouraging you to continue talking. He wanted to know what made you feel this way and preferably how to make you feel better, if you’d only let him.

“I...you know dogs, when you pet them you release all these happy hormones? Like serotonin, oxytocin and prolactin. It calms you down, that why dogs are often used as emotional support animals, too,” you explained in a quiet voice, unusually shy about what you were saying.

Megumi couldn’t figure out why.

“I didn’t know that,” he admitted, because he hadn’t.

He never had a dog, an actual one, or known anyone with a dog and although the divine dogs may appear similar to the animal, they weren’t real dogs, either.

“Yeah...i know it’s not really the same but i thought maybe your dogs would have a similar effect and petting them would make me feel better,” you continued, before hastily adding, “I’m sorry, i am totally exploiting you for selfish reasons.”

Megumi couldn’t help but shake his head at your remark, partly fond of how you were concerned about him, partly confused why’d you even come to that conclusion.

“I am happy that I can help you feel better, if only through my ability to summon the divine dogs.”

That was the first time you turned to look at him since you’d stepped into his room and the smile you were giving him was absolutely blinding. Your red eyes seemed to sparkle at his comment, too.

“You’re too kind, Megumi.”

He returned your smile, hoping it was just partly as reassuring as yours was.

The both of you sat in silence, Megumi racked his brain for a way to distract you even more from thoughts of homesickness and cheer you up but his mind came back blank.

He wasn’t really the best when it came to ted talks, Itadori would have been a much better candidate for that, or Gojou sensei, who was specialised at distracting others with his silliness. If only he were a little more competent in one of those areas.

“I think they like you.”

He didn’t know why he had said it, it was just the first thing to come to his mind.

You looked up in surprise, the white dog nudging you into your side when your hand stopped moving though its fur. Your eyes fell down at it in confusion and then a wide smile broke out on your face.

It was beautiful. Blinding.

“You think so?” you ask happily, turning back to look at him for a second, before resuming to pat the dog in your lap.

Megumi watched, smiling softly at the exchange.

“Yeah.”

You hummed in content.

Maybe he wasn’t too bad at it, judging by your lightened up features and the soft upwards curve of your move as you continued coddling his dogs.

Anyway, if you asked him, he’d summon the divine dogs for you anytime if that gave him an excuse to have you around more.

#jjk #jujutsu kaisen #jjk oneshot #jujutsu kaisen oneshot #jjk fluff #jujutsu kaisen fluff #fushiguro megumi #fushiguro megumi x reader #fushiguro megumi oneshot #fushiguro megumi fluff

[platypus-quacks-too]

Well, you can’t say it wasn’t an eventful episode. It also felt a very Ted Lasso episode (whatever this means, I am not able to to describe it).

* This show has the very rare ability to give us all the hints to understand something will happen, and still be surprised about it and never betrayed. It happened again this week with Nate’s betrayal. I did expect Ted’s panic attack to be revealed to press, I did expect Nate doing something stupid about that... and here we are. So yeah, I did expect it. Did it hurt less? Heck, no. * Still I really can’t be mad at him. I mean, I am mad, but I am mostly sad to have witnessed Nate the great being consumed by insecurity and ambition and becoming this. * It has been said maybe but Trent (The Independent) telling Ted about the article, somehow apologizing and revealing his source (!!!) was a big deal. * It’s just now I can’t think of how Ted must feel about this. You remember which photo was framed next to Henry’s right? I AM NOT FINE. * Oh, Ted. Just when it seemed he was doing better. Remember I said it felt a very Ted Lasso episode? I guess I meant that Ted was back, at least in part. * At least, his goodbye with Sharon was everything. I felt all his disappointment and hurt when she left without saying goodbye, I melt when he gave her (OF COURSE) another toy soldier. I really appreciated the relationship they eventually built over time. * I still want to know what the heck was in that letter. * ANYWAY. So, we all agree that next year when Rebecca is gonna return into Ted's office, it’s gonna be for a big damn kiss or something, right? Whatever it will be, we know that next season, second to last episode is gonna have this scene again? * Anyway (2), I literally screamed with joy at that moment?? Beside the obvious foreshadowing, they were in the same room?? talking?? of a serious topic??? and Rebecca was vulnerable to him??? And it clearly it was big deal to her to tell him about Sam??? Like everyone and their cat knew about it BUT TED and he had to tell him why she was so torn about letting Sam go. * Ted’s reaction was priceless. This is bad, right? But it made you happy, right? This is bad! But you have to follow your heart and your guts. Oh, Ted. * The biscuits are back and nothing hurts. * ‘The boss [...] smells like pizza, roses and, I assume, Viola Davis.’ this is oddly specific and absurdly sweet. * Is me or Sam’s chant was build over Seven Nation Amy? It sounded a lot like po-po-po-po-poooo and in this case, it’s okay. You can use on Sam, my beloved. * I sincerely think he is gonna leave eventually. His family is probably all for it, and the very thing we knew about him was how homesick he felt. And him and Rebecca... I think they definitely done for good. She had the chance to keep it going, and simply she didn’t. * I know there is lot of drama regarding Keeley and Roy but I can’t feel worried about them? It’s not all unicorns and rainbows, but it doesn’t feel like that what they are going through is their ultimate doom. Moreover, once again this show proved to be different and put an established relationship facing.. realistic, not preposterous made up issues? Like before with the ‘too much time together’ issue, now the ghost from the pasts and the legitimate fears of commitment. But the point is, I feel like everything is gonna be fine. * Which does not apply to everything else, of course. I am so scared for the finale, mom come pick me.

#Ted Lasso #unrequired opinions

[mediocre-writerr]

lonely heart [leah rilke]

pt.7 of bring us through

leah rilke x reader

requested #1: Part 6 of Bring us Through where we see more of just all the girls together as a group working together? Maybe more of the reader with like Dot, Fatin, Rachel, Martha and Nora?

requested #2: Omg the part 6 was absolutely amazing! It hit me right in the feels, I love angst. Would you maybe do a continuation of it?

*not my gif*

You didn’t know what it was. If it was a break or a breakup. Leah didn’t seem to be making an effort, but neither were you.

Of course your insomnia started coming back. Unable to sleep, but rather stared at the fire. This night wasn’t any different. Leah’s arms weren’t wrapped around you so you felt empty. The comfort you once found in her arms were long gone.

“You’re still up?” Toni asked, groggily. She got up from her spot next to Shelby placing herself next to you.

“Insomnia’s back...” you mumbled and she just nodded. Time went on as the two of you just sat in silence. The fire crackling and the oceans lapping were the only sounds you could hear, “Does it ever stop?”

“Does what stop?” Toni questioned, tilting her head to finally look at you.

“The hurting...I know about you and Regan. She was your first love and all.” you explained.

“Shelby told me you already experienced a first love. I didn’t know Leah was the one.” she said, more confused than anything else.

You shook your head, “She’s not, but it hasn’t stopped hurting. Not from my first love, not after this fight with Leah. So does it stop hurting?”

Toni sent you a sad smile, shaking her head, “No, you just make room for it, as pessimistic as that sounds it’s the truth.” you let out a disappointed sigh, running your hands over your face, “But...whether happens, forgiving Leah or finding someone new, your heart will be ready. You’ll just have to listen.”

The next morning you were hanging out with Fatin. Shelby and Toni off on their weekly rendezvous, so you were left alone. You would usually spend this time with Leah, but obviously that was out of the question.

You and Fatin were trying to listen to the instructions that Dot was giving. The two of you stared at Dot like she had three heads and sighed before turning your head to look at each other. Fatin’s mouth slightly open. ‘Do you understand what she’s saying?’ Fatin mouthed with furrowed brows.

You shrugged your shoulders as you shook your head. Both of you stifiling a laugh to look at the girl in front of you. Leah’s eyes glanced between the two of you as her jaw clenched. She shouldn’t be feeling this way, she’s the one who picked a fight for the same reason she’s angry now.

But if there was a budding romance between you and Fatin it wasn’t alright with her. Leah has been trying to figure out ways to talk to you and apologize. But it seemed like all of the words in the world could not express how sorry she was.

“Shelby?” Leah called out as she followed her along the shoreline, after they got back from their alone time. You weren’t the only one who had stopped talking to her, “Shelby please!” she exclaimed pulling on her wrist to face her.

“What do you want?!” Shelby snapped as she looked her way.

The brunette seemed to shrink at her words, but nevertheless pushed on with the subject. “I just wanted to apologize...”

“I’m not the one you should be apologizing to.” she shot back. Anger gleaming throughout her eyes.

“I know, I know, but it’s more complicated than that.” Leah sighed as she looked down at her hands.

The blonde Texan rolled her eyes. “And what exactly is complicated about it? It’s not too hard to say ‘I’m sorry’.”

“But it is hard to say ‘I love you’ when I don’t even know if we’re still together,” Leah confessed, “Shelby, I know I fucked up. And I know I broke the one thing that I promised you, but I need to know how to get her back. We haven’t talked since and it’s killing me. I need her in my life.”

Shelby sighed as she looked at you. You were smiling, but your eyes didn’t have that sparkle they used to. In fact, you looked more tired again, like you haven’t been sleeping again. At least not since what happened with Leah, “Well you aren’t going to get any closer to getting back together by wallowing in your sorrows. Don’t make me regret giving you another chance Rilke.”

You sat along with Fatin, Dot, Martha, Rachel, and Nora around the campsite as Dot tried training all of you to keep watch on the fire. Your leg bounced up and down as you watched Dot’s makeshift Ted Talk on firewood.

“So make sure you get the driest pieces possible. One slightly wet wood will cause the fire to diminish.” Dot explained.

Fatin snorted, “Sounds familiar, like a lovely pe-“

You laughed along with the rest of the girls as Dot cut her off, “Alright, moving on! Y/N, you’re on inventory with Martha. Rachel, you’re with me. And Fatin and Nora.”

Martha’s suitcase washed up on the shore not too long ago. She unzipped it to reveal a froggy type poncho. “Yes! Froggy! I used to wear this thing whenever I was stressed and it would calm me down!”

She slipped it on, “Awe that looks so cute on you!”

“Thank you!” she said, doing a little twirl. There were a few little moments of silence before she finally spoke up, “So what happened between you and Leah? You guys are like dating right?”

You swallowed before answering, “Yeah? I don’t know...we just got into a really rough fight and I don’t know if we’re dating anymore.”

She noticed how sad you looked and smiled at you sympathetically. “Dinosaurs eating people,” she began singing the song you would sing to all of them when they were upset and your lips quirked upward, “Dinosaurs in love,”

“Dinosaurs having a party. They eat fruit and cucumber!” the two of you sing together.

“Wait! You guys are singing the song without me?!” Fatin screamed from where she was and her and Nora ran over.

Fatin pulled you up from off the ground and spun you around, “They fell in love. They say ‘thank you’.” Nora sings.

“A big bang came and they died!” Fatin sang, doing this weird lyrical dance. Your smile grew even wider as she danced all over the place.

“Dinosaurs dinosaurs fell in love! But they didn’t say goodbye!” the four of you sing as Fatin continued to dance.

“But they didn’t say good-BYE!” Rachel and Dot sing loudly coming out of nowhere.

All of you laughed with one another and for the first time since the fight, you felt okay. All of you sat back around the campfire, much to Dot’s disappointment of you and Martha not doing the one task she asked you to do.

You felt someone tap your arm from behind and you turned around to come face to face with Leah. Your heart skipped a beat as your breath hitched. The two of you hadn’t talked since and it’s been consuming you.

You took a deep breath, “What’s up Leah?”

“Um...I have to go scavenging for fire wood and uh you’re the one who got the infamous Dot’s Wood Ted Talk. I was wondering if you’d like to come with me?” you were silent for a beat before she started talking again, “If you don’t want to, you don’t have to.”

You shook your head, “No it’s okay. I’ll go help you, strength in pairs you know?” you say.

A small smile formed on her face, “Yeah strength in pairs.”

You got up and wiped the sand off your butt, before falling into step with Leah towards the jungle. Toni gave Shelby a look as the two of you walked away, “Are you okay with this?”

“I’m giving her one last chance.” Shelby answered and Toni nodded, “Can I chew her ass out next time if she fucks up again?”

“Wait I want in on it!” Fatin exclaimed, interrupting the girls’ conversation.

“So do I!” Dot confessed looking at the couple.

Shelby just laughed, before nodding, “All of you could take part in it.”

You and Leah barely talked the entire time. Embarking in comfortable silence. The humid jungle making you grow tired by the second and Leah could notice.

“Hey did you wanna take a break? It’s getting pretty humid out here.” she suggested and you smiled at her before sitting along the trunk of a tree.

She sat down next to you, but maintained her distance. She didn’t want to make you uncomfortable or anything.

You stifled yet another yawn, “Have you been getting sleep?”

You shrugged your shoulders and stared out into the forest, feeling somewhat embarrassed, “No.”

“Love, you haven’t?” she asked and her eyes went wide at the nickname she said, but you didn’t seem to mind. All you did was shake your head, “If you want you can rest here, I’ll keep watch and wake you up when I think it’s time to head back.”

You pondered this question for awhile, before ultimately nodding. Leah was about to give you room to sleep, but before she could you immediately rested your head in her shoulder as if on instinct. Leah tried to make you as comfortable as possible, placing her head softly on you.

Soft snores started emitting from your mouth, making Leah smile softly. This meant that you didn’t feel awkward around her. That meant that she might have a chance with you.

Leah sighed as she hung out with Fatin a couple nights after. The two of you would go on missions together like usual, talking more and joking around more, “So she didn’t seem awkward around you?” Fatin asked, trying to figure out what was going on between you two.

She shook her head, “No...I don’t know. It just seems like she’s not interested in me anymore.”

“You just gotta grow some balls and tell her how you feel, dude! That’s the only way to actually know.” Fatin put her hand on Leah’s shoulder.

The blue-eyed girl sighed, “But I just got back to being friends. I don’t want to ruin it.”

“I know this line has probably been told by everyone here, at some point or another, but look we’re on a stranded island. We don’t know what’s gonna happen to us, if we’re gonna get saved or not. You gotta take the leap of faith.”

Leah nodded and sighed, going back to stare at you and Shelby.

You laughed as Shelby was telling you her champagne problem with Toni “Can you believe Toni wouldn’t let me be the small spoon? Like you put on this big ol’ tough girl front, but you can’t be big spoon once?!”

“I think its fitting.” you teased as your gazed rested on Leah, who was already staring at you. The orange hue from the fire lit up her face, but you could still see a small blush forming on her cheeks. She smiled before looking down at her hands.

“You still love her?” Shelby asked.

You hesitantly nodded, “Yeah, I don’t know. I just-what if I get my heart broken again. Or everything falls apart...again. I can’t go through something like that again.”

Your best friend put her hands on your shoulders, shaking you lightly, “Love is terrifying. But if you’re constantly terrified about getting your heartbroken, you’ll be stripped of love your entire life.”

She looked at you dead in the eyes, all seriousness, no lightness, “I mean look at us Y/N, we were stripped of loving who we wanted our entire lives. Now is our chance to finally change that. And if Leah’s not the one and you get your heartbroken then we’ll get through it. Because if God brought us to it?”

“God will bring us through it.” you say with a smile on your face.

“Hey can we talk?” a voice calls out from behind you. You turned around to see Leah standing there with a nervous smile on her face.

You nodded, “Yeah of course.”

“I’ll leave you two alone.” Shelby said as she got up from the spot next to you, bringing her voice to a whisper, “Don’t fuck this up.”

Leah bit her lip and sighed, “I still have feelings for you.” your breath hitched immediately, “I know that I fucked up and I’m so sorry. For all of the things I’ve said and just all of it. I guess I just self imploded because the only love I’ve ever felt was with someone I shouldn’t have been with in the first place. He took my heart that was fragile like glass and just dropped it.”

Her eyes started tearing up, “But you, when everyone thought I was insane you were there. You broke down my walls and you liked me for me. I think I’m in love with you Y/N and that terrifies me.”

You take a few steps forward, gently putting your hands on her shoulders and pulling her closer and pressing your lips against hers softly. Leah’s breath hitched against your lips before she shut her eyes and moved them against your lips slowly. You smiled against her lips and pulled away after a few moments. “I love you Rilke. So much.”

Her smile grew more and more, “If you want we can take things slower. We can figure everything out together.”

You leaned closer and gave her a chaste kiss, “I’d like that.”

///

tag list:

@yourssincerelyj @shalifoestilinski @greysky22 @hstoria

#the wilds imagines #the wilds #leahrilke #leah rilke imagine #leah rilke x reader

[professortennant]

Ok, how about Rebecca consoling Ted after the team loses a big game?

For a moment, just a moment, she--along with the rest of the AFC Richmond crowd--had thought they had pulled off a miracle, a Cinderella story that the press would be talking about for ages. Relegated only to win a Championship League final in the very next year, a team with a vengeance and a coach with a chip on his shoulder.

He hid it well, Rebecca thought. But now that she knew he hated being underestimated, counted out before the match even begun, she had seen a real change in him. She’d asked Beard about the change during a training session she was observing, the sun and blue sky too tempting to not go out for a bit. Ted was running right alongside his players, yelling words of encouragement and correction in equal measure. 

“I think he’s realized he’s not in Kansas anymore.” A beat of silence and then, “And I think he wants to prove himself to y--everyone.”

She hummed in acknowledgment and watched as Ted blew his whistle, jogging to midfield, and animatedly demonstrating the run he wanted for his players. It seemed now that the team was on the same page, it was time to put the real work in.

But Lady Fate had other plans for AFC Richmond this evening, a night that should have been victory. A dirty tackle on Richard left him with a torn ACL, lifted off the field on a stretcher, a drizzle of rain made for less-than-ideal field conditions, and a series of simple turnover errors had left the team in disarray and confusion. It was over before it could start. 

In the locker room, she watched as Ted tried to cheer his team up, noting that third place didn’t mean they were down and out for the Premier League, that they just had to work a little bit harder for a little bit longer. But even Ted’s heart seemed to be a little bit broken, a little disappointed. 

“Ah hell, who am I kiddin’? This flat out stinks. I really wanted this for you boys, I really did. Maybe I let y’all get ahead of yourselves. Let myself get ahead of myself,” he amended, eyes flicking down to his Nikes. “And I’m sorry for that. I should have kept you focused on tonight’s game. We can’t help injuries and field conditions, but we can control energy and the fundamentals. We were sloppy tonight. That team wasn’t better than us. I know it. Y’all know it.” He sighed, looking around the room. “We are going to be promoted this season, fellas. But tonight: Be sad, be disappointed, be angry. Be whatever you gotta be tonight to light a fire under your butts because we are gonna work that much harder starting tomorrow morning.” He nodded his head at each of them before turning on his heels, shoulders hunched inward, leaving his players behind and Coach Beard to wrap up the evening. 

Rebecca frowned, following him into his office, shutting the door with a soft click. It had become custom for her to join the team--win or lose--in the locker room, his words from so many months ago still ringing warmly in her ears. You liven up the place.

But this was not the Ted Lasso she was accustomed to seeing: not angry, not encouraging, not blissfully optimistic. Just wilted. Disappointed. 

He looked up at her from his slumped position in his chair, a small, tired smile on his face. “Hey, boss,” he sighed, rubbing his hands over his eyes and through his hair, ruffling it and making it stand up. “Not our best showing.”

She stood in front of him, hip leaning on his desk, as she considered him. “Oh, I don’t know about that,” she teases. “There were some real lowlights last season. You yelling like a maniac about stopping the clock comes to mind.”

“Yeah, well, I still think it’s a stupid rule. Why keep the clock running when no one’s playing? Don’t make a lick of sense to me."

“You know what doesn’t make a lick of sense to me?,” she prompted, earning a delighted look from him for using his own phrase as a segue. She tilted her head towards the locker room where she could see players milling about, heading for the showers or crowding around Coach Beard and his whiteboard. “That speech out there wasn’t exactly the Ted Lasso motivational speech I’ve come to expect.”

He groaned and quite suddenly lurched forward, forehead smacking the desk with a loud thunk. She acted without thinking, hands immediately going to the back of his head, fingers sliding through the thick hair, rubbing his head. “Ted! What the bloody hell?”

“‘m fine,” he said, voice muffled against a stack of papers, still facedown. She laughed, relieved to know he hadn’t completely lost his marbles, and tugged gently on his hair, encouraging him to sit up.

Instead, he groaned appreciatively in a way that made her heart pound double time in her chest, fingers hesitating in their movement. She went to withdraw her hand but he turned his head to face her, the movement entangling her hands further. 

She looked down at him, eyebrow arched. “Did you turn into a canine while I wasn’t looking?”

He panted at her playfully, a small, half-hearted woof escaping his mouth. “New deal boss: You keep doing what you’re doing and I’ll tell ya the God’s honest truth.”

“You’d tell me the God’s honest truth regardless of my petting, but go on,” she conceded. It was living out a harmless fantasy, she told herself. It wasn’t her fault his hair always looked as it did: perfectly coiffed and styled until it wasn’t, strands falling into his eyes, causing him to develop a new tic of running his hands through his hair, flipping it back into place. It had been maddening to watch and she was self-aware enough to acknowledge the urge to run her own fingers through his hair weren’t platonic in the least (the other images and fantasies accompanying the urge were definitely not to be explored in a packed locker room). 

He grinned lazily up at her as she continued stroking his hair, nails scratching ever so slightly at his scalp, causing him to stutter as he spoke, eyes falling closed. “I let them down,” he confesses softly. “I let them get ahead of themselves, horse before the cart, counted those damn chickens before the eggs hatched. I let them think this one was in the bag--didn’t stop ‘em from goofin’ around at practice--training, whatever. I let them down.”

His eyes flickered open, peering up at her, sorrowful. “I let you down.”

Her hands tightened in his hair reflexively. “Me? Ted, how could you let me down? You’ve done everything I’ve asked of you.” 

“I told you we’d win the whole fucking thing,” he reminded her. “Close but no cigar.”

"I never thought you’d be one to throw pity parties, Ted Lasso,” she reminded him, tugging at his hair once more before sliding her hand down to his shoulder and pulling, encouraging him to sit up. He did so, exaggerating the motion as if every movement cost him something. She bit back a smile.

He swiveled in his chair and it was only then she realized the position they were in: him in the chair, legs splayed while she stood between them, leaning back against the desk. Her cheeks flushed warm and she shook her head slightly, clearing the fantasy from between her ears.

She reached down to take his hand in hers, squeezing slightly. He clung back, fingers wiggling between hers so they were interlocked. She forgot sometimes that he was as desperate to touch as she was to be touched. 

“You did promise me you’d win the whole fucking thing. But I don’t recall a timestamp on that promise,” she reminded him. “And this is not over, Ted, not by a long shot. We have one more chance to make it to the Premier League for next season. The season is not yet over, Coach. And I don’t want your players--our players--thinking it is, either. We have work to do and I need you pushing every single one of those men to believe in themselves and this team the way that I believe in you.”

The words came earnestly but awkwardly, a year of walls and shields and a lifetime of British distaste for sincerity and emotions making the speech stilted. It certainly wasn’t a patented Ted Lasso speech, but she thought it a rather good Rebecca Welton.

Ted was looking at her with something akin to awe, mouth parted and eyes bright and gleaming. 

“Rebecca?” he asked, voice low, standing from his seat, still holding her hand. With him standing and her leaning against his desk, he towered over her ever so slightly, just enough that she had to look up to him. “I would really, really like to kiss you right now, if that’s alright.”

She blinked at him for a moment, mind racing, before giving a single, jerky nod. The moment she indicated her consent, he was there, fingers disentangling from hers so he had both hands free to cup her face on either side, cradling her gently as his lips pressed softly, quickly to hers. The combination of the warmth of his lips, the tickle of his mustache, and the sudden shift in action had her gasping into the kiss, her hands steadying themselves on his hips, clutching at one of his ridiculous jumpers, kissing him back as insistently as he was kissing her.

And then it was over.

But Ted kept his hands on either side of her face, thumbs stroking over the soft curve of her cheek, his forehead pressed to hers. “I’ve wanted to do that for a long time now, but, uh, never seemed like the right time.”

“And now was the right time?,” she asked breathlessly, her own fingers and thumbs making abstract geometric shapes along his hips and sides, tracing the lines of him.

He pulled back, grinning, and she was delighted to see that his eyes were once again gleaming with the positive, radiant, sunshine force she had come to associate with him. 

“What can I say? I’m a sucker for a good pep talk.”

#ted lasso #ted lasso fic #ted x rebecca #THANK YOU FOR THE PROMPT #honestly regretted having the team around bc they woulda gotten up to a lot more in that office... #and rebecca's fantasies are my own my god that hair #andreasbayden

[idreamofplaid]

A Merry Little Christmas

Summary: Christmas can be, above all, a season of hope. Dean reminds the reader of that.

Characters: Dean x Reader; Marla & Ted (OCs)

Word Count: 2821

Warnings: Oral (female receiving)

A/N: This is for @firefly-in-darkness written as part of @negans-lucille-tblr ‘s fic exchange. I hope you like it. It’s inspired by the song “Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas”.

The bar was empty with the exception of some of the hardcore regulars. It was the week before Christmas, and that changed the clientele somewhat, but not entirely. Some of the fortunate had places to be, loved ones to draw near, and celebrations to bring to life the joyful intent of the season. For others, it was the same routine, December 25th was just another day on the calendar. 

Marla Henderson had her usual seat at the end of the bar wearing something tight fitting and low cut to see whose eye she might catch. She’d been doing it ever since her husband left in a desperate grab at feeling wanted, desired, and validated again. Watching her always made Y/N feel a hollow, nagging sadness in the pit of her stomach. She could be Marla in a few years, only without the husband. 

That thought filled her with melancholy, and the music from the jukebox wasn’t helping. The Carpenters could always make her feel wistful even when the song was about roasting chestnuts and meant to be festive. The garland that was hanging in swags around the room was also having the opposite of the desired effect on her. It looked out of place, like a poor attempt at a pretense of merriment.

Ted Markham was also here tonight, slinging back the whiskeys. The holidays hadn’t changed anything for him, or about him. He was always on the prowl, looking to get lucky, and far too often he was looking to get lucky with her; tonight was no different. “Hey, darlin’, how about another one?”

She poured another shot in his glass and asked a little more cynically than she should  with a customer, “Don’t you ever have a limit, Ted?”

He put his hand over hers suggestively. “Not too often, gorgeous.”

She pulled her hand away and put the bottle back on the shelf. He just wasn’t getting the hint tonight. “Y/N, why don’t you come over here and sit on this stool next to me? It’s a slow night. Nobody’s gonna mind.”

He was right about one thing. It was a slow night. Couples seemed to have already paired up for the holidays to bask in the warmth of true love or enjoy a fleeting whatever to help get them through the season. After a string of disappointing boyfriends and too many dashed dreams of holiday romance, Y/N had basically given up. “Sounds tempting, Ted, but I’m gonna pass.”

He wasn’t usually a belligerent drunk, but maybe something in the tone of her voice had set him off. “Now is that any way to talk to your best customer?”

Y/N had been in her share of tight spots thanks to her chosen line of work over the years, but this time she found herself getting really uncomfortable and just wishing she could sink beneath the bar and hide.

She was struggling for a comeback and starting to get flustered when a tall, powerfully built stranger with broad shoulders and the face of a Calvin Klein model confidently strode up to the bar. He made a point of standing in Ted’s space and flashed Y/N an easy smile. She got lost in his deep green eyes for a minute and almost missed what he said. “Sorry I’m late, sweetheart.”

He gave a cursory glance over his shoulder at Ted. That was all he needed to do. This man had an air about him that anyone with an ounce of sense or self preservation would know not to challenge. Ted made a lame excuse about it being late and hastily left.

The unknown, handsome guy took a seat on the barstool Ted had vacated. Marla was already giving him her best sultry look. Y/N recovered from her earlier discomfort. There was something about being in this guy’s presence that made her feel safe. She couldn’t think of anything clever to say so she went with, “Thanks for rescuing me. Can I offer you a drink on the house?”

He smiled again, and she felt her Grinch like shrunken heart start to glow a little bit. “Sure. I’m Dean.” He extended his hand.  When she accepted his hand to shake it, it was warm, solid, and strong. Y/N could get used to the feeling of that hand.

Dean stayed until closing time, and after a couple shots of whiskey he had switched to beer. It was a small gesture but one that didn’t go unnoticed by Y/N. He wasn’t interested in getting drunk.

Y/N wasn’t sure why he was alone in a bar tonight. Maybe he didn’t have anywhere to go? Maybe he was alone too? That was hard to believe; look at him. And for the first time since she’d noticed Dean, she did. She really looked at him.

There was a depth in his eyes that it was easy to miss at first, probably because he kept it hidden; he didn’t want anyone to see it. It was a type of softness wrapped up and hidden by the hard glint he’d most likely put in his eyes because sometimes he needed that to survive.

Y/N was fascinated by Dean and spent the rest of her shift getting to know him. Marla gave up after about forty-five minutes and left when Dean hadn’t so much as tossed a look in her direction. Y/N’s questions weren’t too probing, just the getting to know you kind of stuff. “I’ve never seen you around before. What brings you to town?”

Dean took a slow drag from his beer, and the way his full lips circled around the opening of that bottle was more than a little distracting. He gave a mirthless chuckle and sighed. “Business is kind of slow for once. Don’t have much family, just my brother. He’s got a new girlfriend. They’ve been dancing around each other for a couple of years now. Finally took the plunge, and I’d just be the third wheel. So, I hit the open road to see where it’d take me.” He took another drink of his beer and appraised her with his eyes. They stopped their downward movement at her neck, which she also appreciated. “What about you? How’d you end up in this bar?”

This was a story Y/N didn’t tell often. She preferred to keep it pushed back as far as she could get it, covered in dust, on a high shelf where no one ever looked. She wanted to tell him, and poured herself a drink to reinforce her courage. “I needed a new start. Life didn’t turn out at all like I had expected or hoped, and I thought a change in geography might magically fix it.” She put her whiskey glass down on the bar after only taking one sip. “I was wrong.” 

Dean didn’t say anything, instead waiting for her to go on when she was ready. “I didn’t have the happiest childhood. For awhile I thought I’d escaped all that. Met a guy. We even had a little house together, but then he cheated on me. End of fairytale.”

Dean leaned forward, resting his forearms on the bar. His voice was quiet, reflective. He looked into her eyes, and she knew he actually saw her. “Bastard. You deserved better.”

Y/N laughed, the way she sometimes did when she didn’t know how to process her feelings. “How do you know? You just met me.”

Dean paused, and there was a heaviness in his words when he answered, “I know how to read people.”

Y/N laughed again. “Do you think you could teach me how to do that? I always pick the wrong guy. Did it three more times after him.” She downed the remaining whiskey in her glass.

Wanting to change the subject, Y/N looked around the bar to see if someone needed a refill. She’d been so engrossed in her conversation with Dean that she hadn’t noticed the place had completely emptied out, and it was only 1 am. Christmas. People and their places to go, or worse their utter despair at having nowhere to go. Dean looked around and assessed the situation too. He turned back to her, “Hey, why don’t you close up? I’ll wait and take you home.”

She welcomed his offer; she didn’t want to be alone in this place tonight. The sadness, desperation, and discontent just seemed to hang in the air. Y/N made quick work of wiping down all the tables and securing the stockroom, including the safe. Dean was waiting for her when she reemerged.

He pulled his keys from his pocket; the jingle was loud, but not unpleasant in the empty bar. “My car’s outside.” Y/N nodded. She’d call someone to get a ride to work tomorrow; her car would be okay here. Right now, she just wanted someone to take care of her, even if all that meant was a ride home.

His car matched the man. Rare. Powerful. Something you didn’t see everyday, and completely beautiful. Dean opened the very large and shiny black passenger door for her. He had an unexpected side too. Guys this tough usually didn’t act so gentlemanly.

Her tiny bungalow wasn’t far, and the ride ended too soon for Y/N. Sticking to his chivalrous ways, Dean walked her to the front door. It almost felt like the end of a date, and she found herself wanting to kiss him. Snow started to fall, and she pulled her coat around her more tightly 

Y/N tilted her head up and one of the big fluffy flakes landed on her cheek. For a minute, she remembered how giddy the sight of snow had made her when she was a girl. It was still a symbol of beauty and hope for her. She saw the flakes start to collect in Dean’s hair. Without thinking, she reached up and brushed her fingers over his hair, but resisted the urge to run her fingers through it.  His eyes caught hers for a minute as the snow fell between them before he leaned down and kissed her with a touch as light as the snow that fell on her face.

She opened her eyes slowly. It was quiet with the kind of peace that only a snowfall can bring. The heat was radiating off his body. It warmed her, and she didn’t want to let that warmth,or him, go. “Do you want to come inside?” 

They both knew what that meant. Something had passed between them during that kiss. Dean licked his lips and seemed to be thinking. His eyes lingered on hers for a minute before he answered, “Yeah, I’d like that.”

As soon as they were inside, Y/N took off her coat and hung it up. Then she turned to Dean and started to push his jacket from his shoulders. “Let’s get you out of this.” She hung it on a peg next to her coat. When she turned back to him, he pulled her into a close embrace and kissed her with purpose. It was slow, deep, and doing everything he meant it to do. HIs tongue circled hers, and her arousal grew. If his kiss alone could do this to her, she was in for a memorable night. 

Dean’s hands made their way down her back until one stopped on her waist while the other snaked lower down to cup her ass and give it a light squeeze. She was starting to breathe heavier into his mouth. She pulled away from the kiss and took his hand. “Bedroom’s this way.”

The rooms in her house were tiny, too tiny to accommodate big beds. Right now the coziness of her full size bed seemed perfect. Dean immediately began to strip off his layers of shirts. She watched his naked shoulders and back while he bent over to take off his boots. His body was toned and had just the right amount of muscle. Y/N imagined her fingernails digging into his back. 

She was dragged from her fantasy back to the glory of reality when Dean started to unbutton the black shirt she wore for bartending duties. Underneath that functional shirt she was wearing the kind of bra that makes a girl feel pretty, and the way Dean was looking at it made her feel more than that. His look told her just how much he desired her. 

He took off his jeans before he laid her down on the bed and turned his attention to her lace covered breasts. He laved at her nipples, sucking and kissing them through the fabric. He took one of her taut nubs between his teeth and pulled at it. She moaned beneath him. “Dean, please.” 

He slid further down her body, dragging his hands down her sides, kissing all the way down to her pants that were in the way of what she wanted. Dean removed that barrier, taking her panties off at the same time. He parted her thighs and settled between her legs. He made a long swipe with his tongue through her folds, stopping at her clit to lap at before settling his lips around it to suck.

The way he’d kissed her didn’t lie; he knew what to do with his mouth. She was whimpering and pleading with him for more. He pushed at her entrance with one finger, gently exploring. Then he added another and started scissoring them to open her up. She came on his mouth while he stroked her g spot with his fingers.

Her fingers were buried in his hair, and her fists were closed around handfuls of it. Dean whispered against her core, “You’re beautiful, sweetheart.” He kissed her inner thighs while she came down from her orgasm. 

When her breath evened out, she sat up; Dean rose up on his knees to face her. She reached behind her to unhook her bra and let it fall. Then she reached for the waistband of Dean’s boxer briefs to push them down and release his erect cock to stand thick against his stomach. He finished taking them off while she fumbled to open her bedside drawer and get a condom. She handed it to him, he sheathed himself, then laid her back down on the bed, kissing her as they went. 

He buried his face into her neck and kissed that sensitive spot beneath her ear. She put her arms around him and whispered, “Now, Dean. I’m ready for you.”

He entered her with a smooth, swift motion. She inhaled sharply, and he pushed deeply inside her. She moved her body with his, feeling every drag of his cock over her sweet spot and push of it against her cervix. Just like she’d imagined, she dug her fingers into his back when she came and felt him throb inside her, coming just seconds after she did.

Dean said her name as he let go, and she clenched around him; her orgasm revived by his, by the pleasure she could hear she was giving him. They lay motionless for a sweet moment before Dean moved to take care of the condom. When he returned, easing the covers back and slipping into bed she asked him, “What are you doing?”

He motioned for her to get under the warm blankets with him. She settled in beside him, and he wrapped his arms around her. “I’m holding you.”

The snow was still falling outside, and she watched it fall through the window, not sure what to say. It was Dean who spoke again. “Is that okay? Do you want me to go?”

She let herself relax and lay her hand on his chest. “No, I don’t want you to go. I guess I just thought you would. That’s the way this usually goes.”

Dean kissed the top of her head. “Well, that’s not how it should go. You should be held, kissed some more, and told just how beautiful you are. A man would be crazy not to know how lucky he is to have a woman like you in his arms.”

Y/N got very quiet. She felt tears in her eyes, and for once they weren’t tears of sadness. She closed her eyes and just let herself feel what it was like to be so close to him and to hear a man say these kinds of things to her. She trusted him. She trusted what he was saying, and she trusted that this could be something that lasted beyond tonight. Was this even possible? Could it be possible that there was such a thing as a Christmas miracle? She had believed in them back when snow meant hope to her. Dean tightened his hold around her, making her feel secure, and she felt him kiss her forehead. Yes, they could be real.

Everything: @gambitwinchester​ @princessmisery666​ @onethirstyunicorn​ @peridottea91​ @logical-princey​ @emilyshurley​ @beenlovingromansincedayoneish​ @fangirlxwritesx67​ @waywardbaby​ @atc74​ @ledzeppelinsbonzo​ @shaniquacynthia​ @mariekoukie6661​ @tumbler-tidbits​ @67-chevy-baby​ @fandom-princess-forevermore​ @terrarium-jpeg​ @emoryhemsworth​ @crashdevlin​ @heycasbutt​ @jules-1999​ @mrsdeannafuckingwinchester​ @cosicas-cuquis​ @sammyimpala-67​ @queenoftheunderdark​ @dean-winchesters-bacon​ @mrs-meghan-winchester​ @timelordy-fangirl2​ @sweetness47​ @hobby27​ @awesomesusiebstuff​ @kickingitwithkirk​ @becs-bunker​ @sandlee44​ @supernaturalgrandma​ @lonewolf471​ @sea040561​ @dawnie1988​ @maddiepants​ @volleyballer519​ @outcastedangel​ @kdfrqqg​ @lizette50​ @daisymoder72​ @sorenmarie87​ @oldfreakything​ @winchesterxfamilybusiness​ @deansotherotherblog​

Dean/Jensen: @deansyahtzee​ @flamencodiva​ @deanwinchesterswitch​ @feelmyroarrrr​ @sammit-janet​ @focusonspn​ @akshi8278​ @ladywinchester1967​ @sgarrett49​ @wingedcatninja​ @coffee-obsessed-writer​ @adoptdontshoppets​ @ellewritesfix05​ 

#spnsecretsantaficexchange #dean smut #fluffy dean smut #dean angst #dean fluff #dean oneshot #dean x reader #spn christmas

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

You're a worker at Ransom's country club and he takes your virginity, please? 💖

+Drabble request for randsom! He start to blackmail the reader into sleeping with him or he’ll let out her dirty little secret ( you can choose what ever that would be!)

requested by @bbyhoneybee-x

Plus Gratuity

Warning: noncon, thievery, blackmail

Your heart raced as you crept around the locker room. The first time was terrifying and almost paralysing but with each visit the guilt slowly faded. These men were so rich, they probably didn’t even notice the missing bills. They tipped well enough but not enough to stomach their errant hands and wandering eyes. They owed you more if you were going to pay your way through grad school on their perversion.

Sad almost how old men filled their midlife crises with golf and ogling women who weren’t their wives. Women who were much too young for them. How they spent the money which had once brought them pride and joy on a woman who would never do more than preen and give a fake laugh in hopes of another bill in her apron.

But you needed more and you weren’t about to beg for it. Your textbooks had infringed upon your rent and your grocery bill had sent your account into overdraft. The first time had been desperation, the second for your commute, until the profit was as much the thrill as the money. Oh, and your phone was cracked thanks to your sprint for the bus.

Harold Ballard's wallet was thick but you were disappointed to find only ones. Perhaps a post-golf visit to the strip club. Ted Lauren’s was a bit more flush and you trusted that a twenty would be unnoticed among the wad of fifties. You continued your rounds as you listened for any footsteps, any strain of the faucets, any clatter of the locker doors beside your own careful prying.

You eased the last locker closed and sighed. You tiptoed around to the exit just beside the showers. You grabbed the long metal handle but the door didn’t budge. You frowned and tried again. The little knob was broken and the flat face was centered with an impossible hole.

You shrugged and flitted back around and across the locker room. The other exit was much the same and there was only one other left; that which led into the pool. You’d have to hope no one noticed you sneaking through.

That door was locked too.

“You didn’t get the hundred in my shoe. Tucked up in the toe.” You turned at the voice which often had your blood cold.

Ransom was of the few younger members of the club and never had more than an arrogant sneer to offer for your troubles. He was a terrible tipper and a worse person.

“I don’t know what you mean,” You said.

“Don’t act so innocent,” He scoffed as he crossed his arms. “You’re pretty slick. Fast. Quiet. If not a little oblivious.”

“I don’t—”

“Hey, if I was you, I’d fleece these pricks for all they got. Gerry’s Rolex is a cool ten grand, even if it is as old as me.”

You stared at him. You were caught. The bile gathered in your chest and you reached into the shallow apron around your waist.

“I’ll put it all back,” You said softly.

“I don’t care. These assholes won’t even know it’s gone.” He smirked. “Unless… Unless someone tells them.”

“What do you want?” Your head pulsed.

“Oh, honey, don’t worry, I’ll add that hundred to your haul.”

He dropped his arms and his hands gripped his hips, his index fingers pressed to the smooth leather of his belt. He still wore his golf clothes, the white shirt tight enough that you could as good as see through it and his slacks sleekly cut so that he seemed even taller.

“What is it? New purse? Shoes? I always wondered what you looked like without that ridiculous apron.” He taunted.

“Tuition. Books. You know, because some of us weren’t handed a trust fund.” You snarled.

“Now, now, don’t be a bitch cause you got caught,” He warned. “I could be a real piece and tell the owner. I’m sure that tuition will be easier to pay without a job.”

You frowned and stayed quiet.

“You done for the day?”

“On break,” You answered.

“I can be quick,” He winked.

You drew your brows together. You didn’t like the way he was looking at you.

“You can have the money,” You offered weakly as he stepped forward.

“I have money,” He grabbed your arm before you could retreat. “You know that.”

“What are you--?”

“Stop wasting time,” He wrenched you toward him. He spun and shoved you into the locker room. “Not much I could want from you.”

He grabbed the waist of your pants, just below the string of your apron. He pushed you forward around the bench as you tried to dig your flats into the tile. You threw your hands up as he forced you against the lockers. He leaned his weight on you until you felt the metal of the door dip.

“Ransom—”

“Mr. Drysdale,” He grabbed the back of your neck. “We’ve never been that familiar.”

You shuddered as his fingers pushed beneath your pants. “Mr. Drysdale, I—please…”

“We don’t have time to waste,” His breath tickled your ear. “Do we?”

“Stop—I don’t—I can’t—Just tell Mr. Denakos. I’ll tell him myself—”

“Mmm, that’s no fun,” He ripped your pants down below your ass and wiggled his hips as he ground his crotch against you.

You whined as he slid his hand between your bodies and rubbed himself before tearing down your panties. You pushed against the locker and tried to wiggle out from his grasp.

“Please—”

“What’s wrong, sweetheart? Don’t act like you don’t want this.” He purred.

“No, no, I haven’t—”

You bit your lip as he dipped his hand along your ass and forced his fingers between your legs. He kicked his foot between yours and inched them apart. He pushed you harder against the locker and the breath rushed from your lungs.

He was rough as he felt around and teased your folds. You gulped as he slipped a finger into you. You were unprepared for the intrusion. You squeaked and he added another finger.

“Ah, st—ow,” You uttered.

“Come on, don’t act like such a precious little…” His voice trailed off as your body tensed and your nails scratched the metal. “No…”

“Please, stop,” You begged.

“Oh ho, this is gonna be even better,” He drew his fingers in and out of you. “Shit, you better get wet soon.”

“Mr--- Drysdale!” You exclaimed as he pushed until he was knuckle deep. “Ahhh.”

“Fuck it,” He pulled out harshly. “We don’t got time for this.”

The metal of his buckle jingled and tickled the top of your ass. He kept your feet apart with his as he pinned your shoulders with one arm. You felt the smooth tip of his cock as he bared it and pressed it to your ass.

“Ran—”

“No,” He snaked his arm around you and clapped his hand over your mouth. “What did I say?”

You mumbled into his hand as he bent his knees and poked between your legs. Your feet slipped slightly as he pressed his head along your entrance. He pushed until he was cradled by your. He brought his other hand away from his cock and grabbed your hip. He tilted your pelvis and you tried to turn your head away from his other hand. He slammed into you so that your chest was crushed against the locker.

You were on your tiptoes as you were stretched by his length. It hurt so immaculately that the corners of your eyes pricked. He jerked his hips, each time you struggled to keep your feet on the tile, each thrust crushed you further against the locker.

You whined into his palm as he clamped over your mouth and his other fingers curled around your hip and tangled in your apron. You strained around him and latched onto his wrist as you tried to ease the pain.

“A fucking virgin,” He hissed as he rutted against you. “Fucking thief.” He nuzzled your head. “Bet ya not even on anything, hmm?” He got faster and faster, driven by his own voice. “And I just went in bare. Oh, you feel fucking great. So tight.”

You slapped at his hand as your breath hitched and the pressure built in your pelvis.

“I’m gonna blow inside of you,” He whispered. “You like that, hmm? You gonna go out there and smile at those old men with my cum dripped out of you.”

You shook your head and his hand got tighter around your face. He thrust frantically and his grunts filled your ears. Your hips ached as he hammer into you and he withdrew his hand to slap the locked door beside you. He growled and you felt a sudden warmth. He slowed and finally stilled. Your walls were tender and sensitive.

“What time you done?” He asked as he pulled out and his cum leaked from you.

You quivered as he backed away and you barely kept on your feet as you stayed frozen against the metal.

“Well?” He sat heavily on the bench and huffed.

“Four-thirty,” You uttered as you turned slowly to face him. You were stunned as you couldn’t think of anything to do but pull up your panties and black pants.

#dark ransom drysdale #ransom drysdale x reader #dark ransom drysdale x reader #ransom drysdale #ransom thrombey x you #ransom thrombrey #ransom thrombey x reader #dark!ransom drysdale x reader #dark!ransom drysdale #dark!ransom x reader #knives out #drabbles