#but the door is unlocked

[inkskinned]

crows use tools and like to slide down snowy hills. today we saw a goose with a hurt foot who was kept safe by his flock - before taking off, they waited for him to catch up. there are colors only butterflies see. reindeer are matriarchical. cows have best friends and 4 stomachs and like jazz music. i watched a video recently of an octopus making himself a door out of a coconut shell.

i am a little soft, okay. but sometimes i can't talk either. the world is like fractal light to me, and passes through my skin in tendrils. i feel certain small things like a catapult; i skirt around the big things and somehow arrive in crisis without ever realizing i'm in pain.

in 5th grade we read The Curious Incident of the Dog In The Night-time, which is about a young autistic boy. it is how they introduced us to empathy about neurotypes, which was well-timed: around 10 years old was when i started having my life fully ruined by symptoms. people started noticing.

i wonder if birds can tell if another bird is odd. like the phrase odd duck. i have to believe that all odd ducks are still very much loved by the other normal ducks. i have to believe that, or i will cry.

i remember my 5th grade teacher holding the curious incident up, dazzled by the language written by someone who is neurotypical. my teacher said: "sometimes i want to cut open their mind to know exactly how autistics are thinking. it's just so different! they must see the world so strangely!" later, at 22, in my education classes, we were taught to say a person with autism or a person on the spectrum or neurodivergent. i actually personally kind of like person-first language - it implies the other person is trying to protect me from myself. i know they had to teach themselves that pattern of speech, is all, and it shows they're at least trying. and i was a person first, even if i wasn't good at it.

plants learn information. they must encode data somehow, but where would they store it? when you cut open a sapling, you cannot find the how they think - if they "think" at all. they learn, but do not think. i want to paint that process - i think it would be mostly purple and blue.

the book was not about me, it was about a young boy. his life was patterned into a different set of categories. he did not cry about the tag on his shirt. i remember reading it and saying to myself: i am wrong, and broken, but it isn't in this way. something else is wrong with me instead. later, in that same person-first education class, my teacher would bring up the curious incident and mention that it is now widely panned as being inaccurate and stereotypical. she frowned and said we might not know how a person with autism thinks, but it is unlikely to be expressed in that way. this book was written with the best intentions by a special-ed teacher, but there's some debate as to if somebody who was on the spectrum would be even able to write something like this.

we might not understand it, but crows and ravens have developed their own language. this is also true of whales, dolphins, and many other species. i do not know how a crow thinks, but we do know they can problem solve. (is "thinking" equal to "problem solving"? or is "thinking" data processing? data management?) i do not know how my dog thinks, either, but we "talk" all the same - i know what he is asking for, even if he only asks once.

i am not a dolphin or reindeer or a dog in the nighttime, but i am an odd duck. in the ugly duckling, she grows up and comes home and is beautiful and finds her soulmate. all that ugliness she experienced lives in downy feathers inside of her, staining everything a muted grey. she is beautiful eventually, though, so she is loved. they do not want to cut her open to see how she thinks.

a while ago i got into an argument with a classmate about that weird sia music video about autism. my classmate said she thought it was good to raise awareness. i told her they should have just hired someone else to do it. she said it's not fair to an autistic person to expect them to be able to handle that kind of a thing.

today i saw a goose, and he was limping. i want to be loved like a flock loves a wounded creature: the phrase taken under a wing. which is to say i have always known i am not normal. desperate, mewling - i want to be loved beyond words.

loved beyond thinking.

#spilled ink #writeblr #personal #please don't ask me to talk on my experience on the spectrum lol. i hate how ppl talk to me about it #i really try not to write so specifically about it #bc inevitably someone talks to me like im a child #i think this is the first time i've ever openly identified with it but i've been hinting for years #i might delete this. feels big. #the thing is that being on the spectrum actually IS a spectrum #and if u say ur autistic #inevitably someone makes an assumption about ur needs/symptoms #please do not treat me differently than u usually would. like.... we can tell when you do #and like i mention. i do appreciate the effort. i do truly appreciate the effort. #but it still feels like... #when i was blind. sometimes people kind of did the same-ish thing. #they'd find out i was blind and start talking really loudly? #and while i KNOW they're just trying to help. it would be like. i'd be trying to find #the right way into a building (sometimes only 1 door is unlocked and i couldn't see the signs posted about where to go) #and ppl would be like ''OH UR BLIND? YES SO THIS IS A DOOR. IT OPENS INTO THE BUILDING. IT IS LOCKED NOW." #''A DOOR CAN BE FOUND IN MANY LOCATIONS.'' #and it feels like. when i admit to being autistic #someone comes screeching into my life being like THIS IS A DOOR.

[gay-cripply-scientist]

The bestie is getting tired of me trying to shove myself in their letterbox

#tbh creature #autism creature #yippee #I did know the door was unlocked #I still stuck my arm thru the letterbox

[samwwise]

If you say so. But then again, other people's love lives always seem so much more straightforward than our own.

#good omens #goodomensedit #goodomensgifs #crowley #david tennant #good omens 2 #he's like well THANKS nina for unlocking that particular door that's been sealed for 6000 years #oh well time to get absolutely TROLLIED #myedits #gif

[smalllady]

#mass effect #smalllady gifs #meedits #gamingedit #vgedit #dailygaming #dailyvideogames #they fixed this cutscene!!!!!!!! #on the ps3 version you wouldn't see anyone talking after rana unlocks the door lmao

[kedreeva]

Dustin, imitating his role model.

#Stranger things #henderfam #dustin henderson #steve harrington #my gifs #I just love them ok #regardless of whatever snark comes out of Dustin's mouth #he still thinks Steve is cool #and I love that for them #also please note the doors ARE UNLOCKED #the girls get into the car like normal human beings

[rebouks]

Previous // Next

Byrd: Teach us! Juniper: Okay! First, you’ve gotta put your hands above your head. Wren: Nuh. Juniper: This part’s easy. Byrd: Like this?! Juniper: Just like that-.. keep them there and bring your foot up against your leg, like this! [Byrd giggled, wobbling precariously as he mimicked his cousin] Juniper: It takes a lot of practice-.. c’mon, Wren! [Wren scowled, making a break for it; the only thing worse than dancing was being told what to do] … Having given up trying to reply to Alex’s latest letter, Robin stared listlessly at the star shaped stickers on his ceiling. He’d poured his heart out about how nothing ever went right, how he never fit in anywhere, how he was having a tough time at school-.. that he got in a fight, that he kept imagining what it’d be like if his parents died, particularly his father; he’d briefly considered asking what’d happened to her mother too but he’d thought better of the whole thing and viciously crumpled his pathetic attempt into a ball instead. Maybe he ought to burn it in the sink so no one else would read it by accident. He felt bad that he hadn’t replied yet but he’d been in such a foul mood recently that he couldn’t think of anything remotely interesting or fun to talk about, and the last thing he wanted to do was bum her out. He rolled onto his side as Wren stomped toward his door; it rattled familiarly as her little fingernails fiddled with the lock. Robin knew it was her because he could sense her current disdain, and she was the only one of his siblings who’d learnt how to do it-.. plus, if it were either of his parents, they would’ve knocked.

Wren: Juni’s tryna make me dance! Robin: She’s not gonna make you do anything. [Wren grabbed Robin and shook him with urgency, yanking at his hair with desperation] Wren: I’m gonna hide in here, okay?! [Robin sighed; reasoning with a six-year-old, especially Wren, was rather pointless] Robin: Sure. Wren: Wait-.. where’re you going?! Robin: Does it matter? You’re safe in here. Wren: Robinnnnn. Robin: Get off me! Wren: I wanna play! Robin: So, play-.. just don’t delete all my saves again. Wren: You do it! I wanna watch. Robin: I don’t really wan-… Wren: Pleeeeeeease? … Robin: I can’t play if you’re gonna squish me-.. get off. Wren: Uuuugh.. I can’t, I’m stuck. Robin: Move! Wren: [gasps] What is that-.. kill it! Robin: I don’t have anything to ki-… Wren: KILL IT!

#ts4 #sims 4 #simblr #ts4 story #sims story #forever in between #fib #robin finch #wren finch #byrd finch #juniper finch #skdjsk wren.. KILL IT #no questions asked #😂 #reminds me of making my dad play tomb raider for me whilst i watched cos i was too scared to play it myself lmao #poor robin just wanted to wallow in peace tho #😭 #damn that “safe” lock that oskie insisted on pfffft #always wondered what the point in those thumb turn ones was cos u can technically unlock em from outside if u can fit smth in the crack #but ig it makes sense on inside doors just in case smth happens 🤷‍♀️ #neway..

[reegis]

watching people argue abt whether or not its weird to be h*rny abt jane prentiss on my latest tiktok is my favorite thing ever.. will you let the worm lady in…

#its my favorite soap opera rn #big fan of the ppl who are like NASTY but im unlocking the door #my kind of people #yall get it it sjdjffjjfjg

[vamprisms]

(pest control guy coming up from the basement and putting his hands on his hips) well ma'am. it looks like you got minotaurs

#we're not actually licensed to remove these so you'll have to send a few virgins down every s- hey what are you shutting the door for ma'am #no. no come unlock this

[drewpicturesani]

The Traveller

So Chants of Sennaar is a good game-

#chants of sennaar #cos traveller #traveller sennaar #fanart #chants of sennaar spoilers #sennaar #art #character portrait #support small artists #tower of babel #hiiii these are custom glyphs based on how I think each floor might come to refer to the traveller #devotees is a combo of [person] and [up/great] as the traveller helped them to open the doors and ascend #warriors is [person] and [go/pass] as the traveller filtered through their ranks without trace #bards is [freedom] with their lil [person] signifier loop on the bottom as the traveller brought both the serfs and the upperclass bards #their own kinds of freedom #the alchemists is a mix of [specific person] and [open] as the traveller opened their fairy door #and the anchorites #extra spoiler warning just in case #the anchorites is a combination of [key] and [talk] - because they made the traveller to unlock the closed off communication between #the peoples of the tower #PLUS it looks like the ... #what are we calling the god/duty/beauty/transformation/exile glyph yall #the connection glyph? #thatll do

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

Lmao Frank would absolutely keep a list of everything they tried to do to fix this situation. He has his work cut out for him with poor wally as well. Does he know what happened to Sally?

Frank does know what happened to Sally! ofc he caught his first glimpse of her when he sorta woke up, then after he Actually woke up, Wally made sure to sit him down and be like "she will kill you if you go near her <3"

still, Frank didn't really believe Wally. so Wally showed him proof:

and Frank quickly changed his tune.

and honestly, it's more like Wally has his work cut out for him with Frank lmao. cause by the time Frank fully wakes, Wally's pretty much given up. and rightfully so, there's... not really anything he can do except protect his sleeping friends.

so Frank's initial attempts to make a plan kinda went like:

Wally is very earnest about saying "that's nice". it is nice. it's refreshing to have someone around that still believes something can be done, however futile that hope is. Frank will catch on eventually.

#these two are very fun to explore in this au because its kind of a role reversal? in a way? #bc after literal decades of being alone in the dark #wally is jaded. hes learned things. hes unlocked a variety of emotions. hes adapted. hes had an all around bad time. hes Different Now. #and frank? frank (at least in the above scribbles) hasnt dealt with that #comparatively hes bright eyed and bushy tailed!! #so hes like drawing up plans and brainstorming #and meanwhile wally is just lounging off to the side with a book hes read about a thousand times #frank: I HAVE A NEW PLAN! #wally: *pats his head* good job neighbor <3 #wally: *goes back to staring into the void* #wh lights out au #scribble salad #welcome home au #within the year tho frank goes from We Can Fix This! to actively talking to a stick with eddie's hat hung on it #and i mean. there is really Nothing they can do. its out of their hands #but perhaps its in someone elses door.... #also thank you for the opportunity to Talk about this au! ive been marinating it in the braintisserie a Lot!

[blumfrey]

Dr Purnell was such a crybaby in the asylum convo

#like man get it yourself #you literally have the power to unlock every door in sight #simon henriksson #doctor purnell #dr purnell #cry of fear #afraid of monsters #cofaom

[korrasamibottles]

"I could fix her" "I could make her worse" well I could have her tossing her head back and biting her lip and gripping the sheets and pushing her hips up off the mattress and

#POST. #again. you all chose to be here and the door remains unlocked.

[sarcasticassian]

I feel like there’s definitely a universe where Steve heard Eddie singing Nancy’s praises and somehow got the idea in his head that Eddie has a crush on Nancy, so after the hospital he watches them because yeah Jonathan is back but things seem a little weird with him and Nancy and is it because Nancy has a crush on Eddie as well? 

her and Eddie start hanging out more just the two of them as well as with Steve and Robin (a trek through the Upside Down and then later pulling one of them who is nearly dead out of there can really bond a group) and Steve thinks the pieces are slotting together

Eddie and Nancy have study sessions together, they talk about D&D, Eddie shows Nancy some metal bands and she seems to like them and they talk about random books and movies together for hours, tucked away on a couch when the Party hangs out they gossip like old ladies and have their own inside jokes, it makes Steve itch because it looks like Nancy and Jonathan aren’t breaking up and he feels bad for Eddie so he tries to be his friend and hang out with him when Nancy is off on dates and ignores the way his stomach constantly clenches when he’s around Eddie

Robin is watching this slow motion car crash of Steve realising he likes Eddie and panicking that he can’t talk to Eddie about his interests like Nancy can and having a downward spiral about it all, she’s also watching Eddie’s eyes follow Steve around at every hang out whilst Nancy scoffs in the background and gently bullies their friend about his obvious crush on her ex

one night the girls get bored enough that they lock Steve and Eddie in a closet (ha) and go and watch a movie and gossip whilst the boys sort themselves out, unlocking the door but not opening it after their movie is over and their nails are dry

Steve rants to Robin for an hour the next day about how he and Eddie had to stay in that closet all night and that was really mean Robin, Nancy pops up from somewhere within Family Video to tell Steve the door was open and does it really matter when he got to curl up with Eddie all night? no so calm down and also she’s going to watch Eddie’s band play at the Hideout on Tuesday, does he want to tag along and glare at Eddie’s other friends too or did she just get special treatment because Steve thought Eddie liked her

Steve gapes at her but eventually Robin agrees that they’ll go because she has a shovel talk she needs to give actually

#Eddie deffo tried the door realised it was unlocked and didn't say shit #platonic edancy #my beloved #steve harrington #eddie munson #Nancy Wheeler #robin buckley #steddie #stranger things #steveddie #stranger things 4 #fruity four #the fruity four #platonic stobin

[sweet-belladonna]

@blood-soaked-amaryllis hey! little guy! im heeere!

#slowly creaking open the front door nd closing it behind himself tbh #broke into his living space AGAIN. #stop UNLOCKING THE DOORS DAZAI.

[triffany-lottablog]

Seen multiple posts about doing the fire quest in town but i think we are forgetting the best place to do it.

#bugsnax #hi Eggabell #this game lives to put you in a position to really mess with her #Eggabell tells you please don’t come up the mountain it’s so unstable even grumpus walking around can trigger an avalanche #so the game says okay. here’s a giant fuck off cake spider that you have to fight that stomps all over the mountain have fun :) #RIGHT IN FRONT OF HER IGLOO AND THE DOOR SHES TRYING TO UNLOCK

[9e111]

oh hey, it's that guy again

#monster #horror #terato #OC #face horror #body horror #eyestrain #my art #mannequin #kindly leave your doors and windows unlocked #i swear nothing bad happens