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#but the moment the mask comes off it comes out that their affections were only skin deep
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is this actually that uncommon? I don’t even unpack just the DAY I return from somewhere, but it’s literally the first thing I do. I do nothing else until I’m unpacked, I have everything organized back in it’s proper place in the house within an hour of getting home lol.. I thought this was typical??? What’s the cultural norm?
#same with groceries or anything else I;m bringing home from outside -  i put it away or d o soemthing with it immediately#I just don't like looming tasks in the background taking up my mental space like 'oh i still have to do that later' etc.#I can't relax until everything is taken care of. If i try to relax or rest when I just got home from a trip there's just always the nagging#sense that I'm going to have to get up and do something else LATER (put the stuff away) so why not just do it now#It's the whole principle of 'be more uncomfortable in the present in order to help yourself in the future'#Samme thing with covid like. Follow the social distancting tules and wear masks and do everything extremely dillignently NOW no matter how#annoying or inconvenient it is at the MOMENT because the future pay off will save you more discomfort later (more vairants coming out - long#er lockdowsn because of wider spread - you or your family getting sick - etc.)#I am ALWAYS willing to inconvenence myself and ''suffer'' temporarily in the present if it will help my future self or get me a larger#benefit down the line. etc. etc. But to me that just seems like.. literally the only rational thing to do#what's more important? my temporary emotional satisfaction or my long term wellbeing ? always the long term#it might feel good to just come home and flop onto the floor and shove the suitcases aside but is that like hour or so of rest worth#the annoyance later when you realize you've still got to put everyhting up and now you REALLY don't feel like it and etc. etc. ?#just save your future self the trouble and get it out of the way#But again I just thought it's like... everyone would also do that??? If not then when do you unpack? days later???#Kind of like how in childhood I still had a lot of issues (hadn't developed cognitive empathy really at all - no affective empathy - don't u#nderstand social cues well or people at all - etc.. which is a recipe for frustration when Living In A Society since people are always#doing things you don't understand and you struggle to communicate properly or be understood like everyone's just speaking a different langua#ge than you) and worse anger problems and there were a few times I would come home from shcool or something and just freak out and#knock my shelves in my room over and break things or etc - and it's like OKAY that feels fine in the moment but.. consider the aftermath!#now I have to spend like a whole fucking hour cleaning my room and putting everyhting back together and etc. etc. and it's like a negative#feeling on top of a negative feeling. not only am I still kind of mad but now I have EXTRA work to do when I just want to go to sleep#So in a more minor way it's the same thing like.. If I feel shitty from traveling I don't want to DOUBLE the shitty by having extra stuff to#do later and some task looming over my head. I want to get all the bad out of the way first so I can just have uninterrupted peace later lol#if that makes sense? idk lol#The one exception is once recently I had been somewhere and got legit heat exhaustion and was throwing up by the time I got home so#I didn't unpack everything then. But after cooling off and having pedilyte and stuff I still shakily unpacked before I went to bed lol
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honestsycrets · 10 months
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Stung | [Miguel O'Hara x Reader]
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❛ pairing | miguel o'hara x reader
❛ type | oneshot
❛ summary | after a discus malfunction, you're bitten by an anomaly and refuse medical attention. you're in a state that you refuse to show to miguel-- at all costs.
❛ tags | NSFW, sex pollen, mention of a wound, slight chase, miguel o'hara doesn't like to be ignored, cum eating, creampies, abnormal amount of fluid, venom bite, slapping, some insecurity, spanish is not translated, sexual memories.
❛ sy’s notes | my obligatory ABO-sex pollen fic for ATSV. i usually make a ABO/Sex Pollen piece per fandom I write in, so here's one for Miggy 🐝
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“All done!”
You slipped out of HQ’s packed infirmary with a jaunty bounce in your step. Crispy, coppery blood was matted onto your forearm concealed behind a hastily tied bandage. You weren't concerned about it. It would resolve within the hour. Likely less. As would your elevated body temperature. Despite the doctor's prattle about the benefit of further testing, you found their concern to be a non-issue. These things were virtual non-issues, even if the doctor and your man thought otherwise. 
The hallways at HQ were like any other day in your city. Congested with the coming and going of spiders in their daily lives. A glimpse at any group might reveal decadent flirting and haughty laughter. Some were in a rush to their own worlds, but most were completing work assigned by the Spider Society. The one you were looking for reclined against a wall with his arms interlocked one over the other. His displeased rumble prompted you to his presence above all other voices in the crowd. 
“You should have let them run the tests.” His voice was teased with concern but became mild, little more than a drab sigh at your refusal. You blew off his concern with a shake of your hand, gone yellow and bubbly behind a bit of ineffectual gauze. His eye glazed over the wound. You couldn't tell what he was thinking behind his mask, but you didn't need to. You only needed to convince him you were right.
“It’s stopped bleeding, Miggy. It’s just a scratch,” You held up your arm, flicking it with emphasis. His eyebrows raised for a moment, then flattened, staring at you with a dull rictus. “It was just a brief malfunction of the discus.” 
Technically it was more of an impalement, but if Miguel wasn’t going to ask, you weren’t going to invite him to delve deeper. Otherwise, you might spend the next few hours of your life fixing a wound that surely would have closed up by the time results were back. The injury site mildly itched. That was all. Never mind, the slight, honey-colored rash migrating from the puncture site to your elbow. Or the referred pain. Minor things. 
“You’re being stubborn.” 
“You’re the one to talk.” You snapped the discus free from your sash and chucked it toward Miguel.  He caught it with an unsurprising amount of ease, claws clicking in unison against the ineffectual metal.
“¡Qué problema!” he mocked, his voice dry and absent of discernible emotion. 
You closed the distance between your bodies to slide your arms around his broad neck. His other hand came to your lower back. It was warm, the way he touched you, from the bundles of affection that fluttered in your belly to the heat dappling across your chest. You missed this every day. It made fleeing the infirmary all the more worth it.
“I put the anomaly in another discus. One that actually works, no thanks to your programming.”
“That’s what happens when you take things without asking.” He flicked the discus between his thumb and index finger, waggling it for emphasis. It was true that there had been nights that went with banging, clacks, clatters, and the occasional outburst when things weren’t quite going his way. There were a few discuses on his desk. You just so happened to take the one that malfunctioned. “I was working on it. ¿Qué era?” 
“Oh,” you mumbled. “Just some stingy bees. What harm could they do?” 
His eyes roamed your wound. You couldn't help but look down too, both horrified and fascinated by the way the rash had moved in just a brief few minutes. The colour had begun to fade. You glanced up, flattening your mouth into a slight, forced smile.
“Fine. If you're sure.”
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To be fair, you secured many anomalies with and without the help of others. They all went into their cozy, temporary forcefield homes until they could be fairly redirected to their appropriate dimensions. In the downtime, you could help or hinder Miguel's progress. Then, your watch would alert you to another disturbance and the cycle would continue. 
Until that morning. 
Your watch blared, and blared, and blared some more. The early morning sun began to rise and cast offensive beams of light into your room. Usually, it didn’t bother you. But this morning, everything offended you from the scratch of silky sheets on your naked body to Lyla illuminating what darkness was left, all golden and cute. You wondered if that was how Miguel felt when you forgot to pull the curtains, strung out on the bed after he finished with you.
“Woah! Oops!” she turned, covering her eyes with her spindly fingers. A growing ache throbbed between your legs. It wasn’t quite the same dull soreness from Miguel’s late-night visit last night, either. “Sorry, sorry. Miguel--”
“He can handle it,” you bit out, snappier than you intended. It wasn't like you. “Or-- Jess. No, Gwen. Gwen can do it, she loves--” 
“He asked for you.” 
Of course, he did. You scrunched a pillow over your head. Your Miguel couldn’t see you this. Absolutely not. You debated getting up, ignoring what you called a negligible ache that was quickly morphing into a terrible pounding. You can't believe how quickly the thought fell apart, pushing yourself to sit up in bed. The ghost of his scent floods your nose, flashing memories of the night before.
Something at work set him off. Something that commanded no intimacy, but the mechanical release of his rage that wouldn't destroy precious resources. He sat on the edge of the bed, driving your mouth onto his cock with the aid of your hair bundled around his fist. You recalled the shakiness of his thighs under your fingers, his firm legs spread wide fucking your mouth with cold abandon. He chased his own orgasm selfishly, needing the release, needing to see your body painted by whips of his cum sprayed across your exposed breasts. He pulled you off in silence, inspecting the drool and cum that spilled down your chin and throat in rivulets. "What--"
Your face tightened, glancing down at the growing tension in your belly. Everything began to annoy you, especially the scratch of the sheets against your skin, your bed empty of his presence. How could you tolerate that uniform plastered to your ass? You buried into the offensive bed. This was fine. This was normal, recalling what you'd done last night. Surely, the burn had to do with the whole being launched through not one, but two crumbling buildings the day before. The dust and rubble. Were you close to your cycle?
“Tell him I’m dead,” and without another word, you resolved the call. Within seconds she popped up again, bent at the waist because this was your life now. Never could you just… take a day off. There was always something. You muffled your screams of protest into the mattress and dug your feet in, kicking off the sheets, the blankets, the pillows, all of it.
“Is this a fit? You’ve never had a fit before,” Lyla noticed. A fit? She thought the burning of your body was a fit? Damn AI. Resolve. 
Resolve. Resolve. Resolve.
It became cathartic after a good while. Or it would have been if not for your senses hyper-fixating on every minor change in your body.  Despite your apprehension, you knew. What was once a dull pain radiating from your forearm morphed into something much worse. Something you couldn’t blame on the rather average experience of being pelted through the average event of windows and concrete. It was more than a tingle. It burned as it coursed through your body. 
You stumbled over the bundle of bedding into the bathroom. It was there that you realized that to your horror, you weren’t just lubricated, now you were soaked. Your fluids coursed down your thighs as you dabbed the region clean with a bundle of tissues. It did little good. Touching the area exasperated the issue. Maybe you needed an orgasm, maybe ten. An hour or so later, you slammed the heel of your palm into the mirror, fracturing it into shards of terrible glass that crumbled onto the countertop. Beads of blood dabbled onto your reflection. 
“If you d--” resolve.
So not a reaction to your average bee sting. Correction. A great, big, fat colony of hissing, buzzing bees. The act of recalling information was like jamming your hand into fluid water to snatch a tiny hair tie. No matter how many times you tried to recall the information, you couldn’t quite grasp it. It was there, floating around your head, but inaccessible. Your mind traveled back to Miguel. How gentle his lips could be, trailing soft kisses along your neck and shoulder when you rode him in reverse. How deep he'd go. 
"Fuck off!" Your watch blared again. Its beeping filled your bathroom, echoing over and over. You reached behind the door to pluck a silky white slip from its hook and dragged it over your head. You were about to resolve the call again when the hot timbre in his warm voice saying your name gave you pause. Your Miguel, popping up in a golden haze. You found yourself gazing at his full lips, full and plump. If only he was here. He could have his lips on your--
“What are you doing?” 
Lost in thought, you failed to realize that Miguel had been calling you by name again. You shook your hazy mind free of the thoughts that formed a swirling cloud over your head. You slumped down the wall and onto the floor.
Help was what you failed to say. As your mouth opened, nothing came out. The words were not wording. The vulnerability of asking for help was palpable. You soothed yourself by shifting your hands underneath your skirt. What would he think if he saw you here-- ripped asunder by your own biology? Whore. Miguel lowered his gaze, his eyes squinting at the sweat dabbling down your neckline as he looked you over. He wouldn't want you anymore.
“Are you listening? ¡Coño! What is wrong with you!?” 
Resolve.
You resolved him. Your Miggy-- resolved. Oh, you swallowed dryly. He wasn’t going to be happy about that. It wasn’t a matter of if Miguel would come for you. It was a matter of when. When he had time to separate himself from trashing-- whatever was the closest object to him in the lab-- to take out his rage on you. You reached for your medicine cabinet. You had more important things to worry about. First on the list? The searing heat.
Your watch was better off tucked away in a chest in the closet.
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Night came with no solutions. You crouched on your window sill, chest rising and falling. You sought to stare at anything but the mindless buzz of the tv screen inside. Even with light pollution, some stars winked in the distance. Your body was a bundle of warm heat, buzzing with irritation after a fruitless day of soothing your body. You grew accustomed to your pert nipples against your silky slip, the lubricant coursing down your leg. At first, denial. Now, acceptance. You thought tomorrow might be better.
You felt his presence before you heard, smelled, or saw him. Through the sea of scorched sensations battering your senses, there was one that stood apart. A tickle that niggled at the back of your head. It could have been anyone, but you didn’t have to guess to know who it was. “Lyla." 
“You haven’t called him all day,” Lyla squeaked. 
“Called all-- I answered his call!” Your dress was matted to your body, cloaked in an abhorrent amount of sweat. It was only minutes ago that you retrieved your watch confident that you could bullshit something, anything, for a few days of reprieve. You jammed your shaking finger to resolve the call. 
“Not all of them. Miguel was worried.” 
“Worried! Lyla, that is not worried,” you spat. That was your Miguel, scaling the side of your apartment. His talons cracking the siding of your apartment. The reverberations spiraled up your legs, sending waves of anticipation lapping at your core. After your long day, you weren't sure how you were still somehow upright. With every crack of his talon into the brick siding, you were running out of time to come up with an excuse.
In a bid to escape, you fell into your room. The hard floor knocked the breath out of your dry lips. You stumbled onto your feet and supported yourself with a bookcase of less than half-read books. “Lyla, he can’t see me like this!” 
“Then tell me what’s going on,” she popped back up. “C’mon, you can tell me, it can’t be that bad.”
If her tone was playful in some half-baked attempt to neutralize your fight, the threat was imminent. Your hand connected with the top of the window, applying pressure to close the window. A hair too late. At the same time, Miguel’s clawed hand curled around the bottom of the window sash. You were too slow for the man who excelled with power, speed, and efficiency. You weren't going to win this fight. Not with your body threatening to crack at the very sight of your man's strength.
Though you saw him nearly daily, he always took your breath away. His sinewy body was always a sight, his suit accentuated his thick and fine cut. You moistened your lips, longing to run your fingers through his thick dark brown hair as you did every night. You caught his sharp gaze a second longer than you should have.
 “Open up,” he whispered coolly.
He was a distraction. The wind was not on your side either, blowing wisps of his scent into your overwrought senses. His natural musk mixed with the sweat of a hard day's work. Somewhere in there, bitter blood. You could smell the caramelized scent of the flaky, buttery empanadas and hot coffee you shared the day before. It gave you pause, his intoxicating smell and the sultry trill of his voice. But you couldn’t let him see you, not like this.
“Oop, there he is. Just checking on you,” Lyla chittered. Resolve.
“Miggy, please go away,” you sobbed in frustration, shifting to shoulder the window. “Why are you so stubborn!?” 
“It’s who I am.” 
The window cracked all at once. With mere milliseconds to respond to the sash careening into the upper rail, you whirled past the bedroom door. Miguel broke into a run behind you with long strokes of his legs. He made contact, sending you barreling into your lazy sapphire couch from the impact. You saw stars for a fraction of a second before you lurched on your palms and elbows, scrambling off of the couch and across the floor. His hand caught your ankle and dragged you underneath his body.
“¡Ay!” you bit out. “No, no no no. Miggy!” 
“¡Callate!” 
His hand wrapped tightly around your throat to force complacency, pinning you back to the hardwood floor. Your palms slammed onto his chest, drawing lines down his chest. Bits of pathetic electricity fizzled on his broad, muscular chest, a consequence of your fading focus. That focus was eviscerated when Miguel threw his hips flat against your core. Your frantic fidgeting against Miguel soothed some of the terrible, buzzing pressure rattling between your legs like warm honey on a sore wound. The ache for his relief became more important than the impulse for substantial breaths.
“Don’t move. Why are you--”
“I can’t help it,” you cut him off, straining against his large palm to stare at his crotch. His gaze fell on yours, following the path to his soft cock. His eyes widened with the sudden attention. Tears threatened to spill over from your eyes, pricked with spikes of pain. "It's too much!"
You ate your shame with his body crouched between your legs and his large palm choking the air out of your throat. The influx of air not only brought your scent, but your day-long desperation to fix what you believed was wrong. He could smell it now. He could see it now. He could hear it in your voice. He knew why you failed to answer his calls. The violent jabbing of the resolve button. Throwing your watch into your cramped closet to ignore the calls. The pheromones that soaked your apartment. It was unavoidable.
“You can’t help it,” he repeated. Miguel considered you with razor-sharp eyes, nearly as sharp as the talons that rescinded into his arms. 
"I'll see about that." His hand left your neck to reveal bundles of bumpy shivers that soared across your skin. He raised his finger to wipe away the wet tears that fell from your flushed cheeks. Then dropping lower, Miguel chased the thin straps of your gown with his claw and slid the offending fabric off of your breast. The nub was as hard as it had been hours ago when you twerked the nipple between your fingertips and dreamed of Miguel.
“You’re...” he cupped your breast in your palm and massaged your nipple with one sharp twist of his thumb. The gasp that left your lips wasn’t one you were proud of. Your undulating hips that ground down on his cock weren’t entirely unwarranted. You needed it. "Hot. As if you're in heat."
This couldn’t be happening. From a ball of rage to one of arousal, he released a tiny amused chuckle. You spent much of the day in different parts of the apartment with your hand, toy, ice, and water into your body to soothe this terrible ache. So Miguel wouldn't see you like this. It was this moment you sought to avoid after your long day: The moment of Miguel's disapproval. Now he laughed at you.
“Happy?” you sobbed into the forearm that kept Miguel stable. “Go away, someone else could use your stupid help.”
“Don’t you need me?” Miguel dipped his head down. Strands of his dark hair tickled your hypersensitive skin. With the lightweight fabric of his suit, pressing your cunt back against his clothed bulge felt wonderful. You bit your lower lip and watched his cock jut against its fabric. You lifted your puffy eyes to his gaze and found a wicked gleam there. He knew it wasn’t enough contact for the pressure and painful spasms to abate. Deep down, you knew that Miguel was your only hope for relief. Who else could, or would, you call in this condition? Mostly because Miguel always fixed everything.
"Miggy," you murmured. After this pitiful display, he wasn't rejecting you? Your mind flowed weightless and light. The terror of your day faded under his careful caress. In its place, comfort that he would take care of you.
“Don’t you?” His hand snaked between your folds and found it soaked wet, the low throbbing of your pussy palpable. He retracted his fingers and spread the sticky fluid between his thumb and middle finger. At some point, silence became better than an answer. Miguel brought his hand down on your cunt for a sharp slap. Bundles of nerves cried out under the abuse. It shook free a squeal from your lips, bitten raw by the pressure of the day. Your head bobbed into a mechanical nod as to save yourself from another slap.
“You know how to ask. It’s si Miguel, por favor Miguel.”
You needed the warm sensation of his cum. But making those words proved too difficult. Your canines pierced bloody holes in your lower lip. You clawed up his forearms, trying to leverage and force him closer. Miguel grabbed your shoulders and thrashed them back down onto the floor. You felt bad for the downstairs neighbors. 
“Say it.” 
“Miggy,” you looked into his eyes. They were blown wide, nearly fully black with a thin outline of scarlet, chasing the outline of your exposed breast. For all his talk, you realized he wasn't immune. Even with his face tight, his eyes focused on the same thing you needed. Maybe, all this time, you were baiting Miguel with half-assed answers. They were invitations. Invitations to come to fill this need you had. You would be lying if you said that wasn’t what you wanted this whole time. Finally, you had him where you wanted him. 
Miguel broke eye contact first. He cupped his plush lips around your nipple, suckling the breast taut and wet. You cried out in surprise and arched into Miguel’s mouth, enticed by the fangs that grazed your nipple. As quickly as he came, he was gone.
You lurched up, palming Miguel's dick through his pants. His hips bucked into your palm. He refused to make any sound as he considered your next movements, releasing Miguel’s cock from his suit. Impatience and need coalesced into your brave movements, sliding your palm against him. He was impossibly thick and hard, dribbling at the tip. Miguel huffed a small noise as your palm ran over him. You dared to call it a moan.
Miguel sneered and shoved you back onto the floorboards. “I’ll only tell you one more time. Ask me properly.” 
"You do too, don't you?" You giggled. A noise that grated his ear. With the belief you wouldn’t bolt, Miguel shifted back onto his knees. You wouldn’t. There was nowhere left to run. Not that you even wanted to, fat and hungry off Miguel's growing desperation.
"Come here." He snaked his hands underneath your knees, dragged you close, and pushed them to your chest. Your eyes fluttered shut. Moments later, the sensation of his thick dick sliding against your engorged folds forced them back open. It gave you just enough relief through the pulsing pain to look at him with your hazy eyes. From this angle, you appreciated how large Miguel had gotten. His round cock-head bobbed and crested over your mound as it rubbed against your aching clit. His face was trained, focused. He wasn't going to relent first.
The nagging pressure never abated. You sought something more, something better, the sensation of being filled. With every glide, you squeezed your walls in protest to his absence. Your hips protested the restriction of your movement, shimmying against the firm hold he had that kept you in place. You wanted more than that. You wanted true relief from his teasing. Miguel drew back to inspect the fluid over his fat shaft as held you down. You gave in, whining at him like a brat.
“Por,” you scratched his forearms. “Por favor, Miggy. You don’t know what it's like.” 
“All fours-- face down.” 
The cacophony of desire battered and overcame any other human emotion you could have. You complied, crawling onto your fuzzy indigo rug for what came next. Miguel’s gloved hand skimmed across your ass, middle finger skimming toward the center. He followed up his gentle touch by reeling back his hand and cracking it across your ass, searing the nerves alive. Once, twice, and then a third. Tears pricked your cheeks again, a consequence of your nerves being overwrought and now assailed.
“Miggy!” 
He shushed you with fervor, another thwack beating the jiggling flesh hot and red. Your legs trembled under the weight of his slaps. “Ignore my calls again and you’ll get much worse.”
“I didn’t-- you wouldn't want me,” your lips parted in defense of what you’d done. Miguel dipped down to spread your folds, rolling his index finger along your pulsing walls. Your body drew him in, squeezing and urging him forward. Your swollen walls were impossibly tight, straining to bring him in more and more.
"You know I do."
The need for more devoured any other thought, any threats of what he’d do next time. You rolled your hips to ride his hand. In place of a slap, Miguel slid another finger slid in beside the first to stretch your walls open. He faltered at your next words and slid his fingers free.
“Not like… not like I need you.” 
“Who decides that?” he pressed on your upper back to force it down. You complied. Miguel stumbled forward, finally pressing his thick head to your pulsing entrance. His round head pressed, just barely, into your wet hole. You clenched down, inviting him into your warmth. You weren’t sure he’d actually give it to you. It was so damn close.
“You do, Miggy,” you murmured, pushing back. He watched as his shaft slowly disappeared into your body, your apprehension of retaliation rendered you too slow to finish.
Miguel snatched your waist and forced you to take the rest, a soppy squelch lubricating his shaft. The sound that slipped from your lips was entirely uncouth, punctuated by his unforgiving thrusts. Your walls strained around his cock. No matter how many times you took him, the drag of his cock and slap of balls against your body always felt somehow like the first. It filled that ache-- the consistent burning need to have him here, inside of your greedy body, scratching something that you could not itch all day. It’s what you wanted. 
“That’s right, I do.” Miguel rumbled, short, punctuated thrusts beating your clenching cunt into complacency. The pleasure ruptured through your cunt-- battering his dick in response. He let loose a sharp grunt followed by a string of curses. Your sweet release spilled over his dick and balls, dripping down your thighs. Your legs threatened to shook, but Miguel was unwilling to allow your trembling legs to give out.
"Ah! Miggy!" His fangs punctured your shoulder to force you to stay in position, his pelvis stuttering against yours. His growl punctuated the warm, soothing cum that soothed your walls like warm honey over a wound. Your walls milked him free of his cum, spasming in response to his orgasm. He pieced himself together against your back, pulling his fangs free and settling a soft kiss over the burning wound on your shoulder. As if he hadn't been the one to tear his fangs into the crook of your neck.
“You’re not letting go,” he hummed in annoyance. He turned his attention down to your ass, ghosting his fingers over the healing bruises over your backside. You squealed, jerking forward. He followed you forward, punching a hole in the floor by your side. “Fuck, don’t move!” 
You cast your attention back toward Miguel. He huffed forcefully out of his nostrils. He motioned toward your ass as if it were obvious-- your walls were clamped over his cock, unwilling or otherwise unable to let him go, as if he had any more cum to give in that current moment. You took it all.
“I. I didn't-- I can’t--” 
“Yeah, I know. That Bee venom does that. Mine should neutralize it.”
At some point, you murmured. It sure as hell wasn’t doing it now, keeping him seated into your cunt that bubbled with the mixture of his and your release. “You knew about it? I could have died!” 
Miguel chuckled. 
“You wouldn’t. You’re too stubborn to die,” he sighed, fiddling with his watch. The tests-- that you never had ran. Ones that he suggested. Ones that you refused quite openly. “Why would I deny myself the fun?” 
His cock slipped free. Your hips dropped and fell slack against the floor. You weren’t proud of the cum that oozed out of your ass over your decimated room, nor the fact that your useless neighbors hadn’t called for help once. Not that you needed it-- but still. You palpated your stomach, slightly distended. Miguel bent down and gathered the mixture of your bodily fluids on his fingers, suckling his own fingers dry. You watched his wet tongue swirl around his fingertips. It wasn't fair.
“Fun? What fun!? Do you know how long I-- You’re a mean man, Miguel O’Hara.” 
He lurched over, his breath tickling your lips. He kissed you, salty and sweet. Your nose scrunched up, pouting against his lips. He left the room for the kitchen, fetching a wet cloth to clean his body with. He zipped himself back into his suit shortly after and dropped the sodden cloth by the cum puddling under your ass.
“Never said I wasn’t.” 
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7K notes · View notes
maiiiwrites · 8 months
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★ | ATTENTION STUDENTS . JPEG
PAIRING ! theodore nott x f!reader
IN WHICH your arrival at hogwarts is stirring up trouble
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you roamed the halls of hogwarts. feeling overwhelmed in a good way. no words are enough to explain how happy you are to finally be here. the transfer process took so long and stressed everyone who handled it. thankfully your parents assigned someone to do the papers for you.
your arrival at hogwarts mid term grabbed everyone's attention. everyone had questions and wasn't exactly quiet about their theories. they wanted to know who, what, where, why you we're here.
"a new student? in the middle of the term?"
"how odd is that?"
"look there she is, the new student"
you continued walking, not bothering to acknowledge the students trying to get your attention. you were only looking forward to one person. in that exact moment, your eyes finally met for the first time in months. you couldn't mask your excitement from that interaction alone.
theodore didn't expect a new student, much less his lovely girlfriend. his gaze softened and a small smile managed to slip through.
two souls finally feeling each others presence after being apart for too long
that's how it went for the next few days. just simple little glances and the occasional exchange of letters. much to theodore's dismay, his subtle actions of affection did not go unnoticed by the group.
blaise was particularly nosey about his relationship with you. he was always the one who caught onto the small smiles across the hall, playing on the thread bracelet on his wrist, and the hidden love letters in his desk drawer.
"sooo.. theodore what's up with you and the new gal," blaise not so subtly asked during breakfast.
theodore perked at the mention of you, "nothing."
"oh come on there's obviously something! at least give me a hint," blaise continued.
"sure. here's a hint, im not telling you."
theodore knew there was no escaping this. they're bound to find out sooner or later. for now, the plan was to stay silent and leave loose ends. leave them curious for a while, but his fool proof plan came crashing down the moment you walked in the great hall.
you smiled at your friends seated at the table. looking forward to having your stomach filled. however, boys surrounded you with gifts and letters before you could even settle down.
you attempted to slip away but they were simply too much. feeling more crowded by the passing second. theodore didn't like how crowded you seemed. the obvious panic on your features was his last straw.
he abruptly stood up from his seat and walked towards you. leaving his friends intrigued by the sudden outburst.
theodore easily made his way to you and wrapped his arms around your middle. the action catching you by surprise until realizing its just theo. your theo.
"everyone back off! you're making my girl feel uncomfortable,"
the whole hall went silent at the confession. the crowd of boys slowly disappeared heartbroken and taken aback from theodore's claim. leaving his act of affection on display for everyone to see.
you turn around facing theodore. finally seeing him up close since your arrival.
"is it just me or you got prettier since the last time i saw you?" you teased.
theodore rolled his eyes and kissed the corner of your lips. "you've been causing a lot of trouble lately," theodore hummed.
you gasp, faking offense by his words. "are you accusing your sweet girlfriend?"
he laughed at your silly antics and hugged you tighter. "never, trouble."
you smiled hearing your special nickname.
"i love you and all but your friends are burning holes through my head," you point, particularly at blaise. theodore finally realized you're both (still) in the middle of the great hall wrapped in each others arms.
he chuckled finding the entire situation funny. theodore finally let you go and tucked a loose strand of hair behind your ear. "i better go back, trouble."
"does this mean we can visit each other now.." you beamed.
who has he to deny your love and attention. "always."
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© maiiiwrites — ALL RIGHTS RESERVED
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romanoffsbish · 3 months
Text
So Kiss Me
Natasha Romanoff x R
Natasha was a perfectionist, something that normally benefited her, but when it comes to dating she is a bit lost. In her time as a spy and single woman she’d shared her fair share of kisses, but with you she’d yet to find the perfect moment… | WC: 1,521
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"Pull over!" Natasha looked at you incredulously, it was pouring down rain and you were on a highway, driving away from her failed attempt at a picnic date.
Just before she denied you she let her gaze linger on your face, you looked so enthralled by the storm; wordlessly she pulled off onto the side of the road, her red emergency lights flashing in the dead of night.
——
If you were anyone else she'd have kept on driving, but you weren't. You were Y/N, the beautiful person who turned her world upside down just by existing. Gravity was lost on her planet though, so the vibe was wavy. All Natasha wanted was to make you happy so she stood beneath the dim light of the moon observing you. Not caring if it was cold and wet, because you were smiling.
After she helped you climb over a white fence and into a field you released her hand and began to twirl around  the wet, open grassy area in a fit of infectious giggles.
You were perfect. This entire moment was, honestly.
Natasha wanted to dance with you, but she was lost in her depraved thoughts, of your lips pressing into hers.
It was too soon, right? Two months and four dates, alongside many a lazy night in at the compound, and she had yet to make the daring move. Was she scared?
No, she told herself she was just being cautious. If you move too fast then things are more likely to crumble to the ground and that was the last thing she wanted. In this moment though, where you are genuinely joyful she questions what even constitutes the perfect timing.
Natasha dreamed it could've been today, you'd have just finished eating: a pb and j for herself and a bit of snacking for yourself, a strawberry here, some cheese and cracker there, a brownie made by Wanda, always.
The thought made Natasha smile, she could only imagine the mess you'd leave behind on your face in your rush to gobble the treat down. Her heart would skip and she'd scoot closer to you with the excuse of needing to wipe your face clean. She'd tease the idea of trying a brownie herself, then she'd lean even closer.
You'd look at her lips, a jolt of electrified energy would surround you as your eyes met again. The desperation muddled into your sweet y/e/c eyes would compliment her desire. Natasha would gulp down her fear, masking it with a channeled confidence and kiss you firmly.
Soft and slow as her tongue swiped your lips, in a perfect world she would have you in her lap. It would be a gradual shift, and just as your thighs touched hers she'd squeeze your hips and slide her tongue into you.
Tasting the brownie, catching hints of a dark caramel, not caring for the way that it covers your natural taste. Yet she would be compelled to stay where she was, unable to separate herself from your affection until she felt your body tremble from the oxygen deprivation. As she'd pull away she'd hotly whisper, delicious—the brownies review; commentary laced with innuendo.
Natasha would observe you fondly, the moment you stop feeling a need to gulp down air you'll meet her gaze and your lips will tiredly upturn. The redhead would grin just the same as she lifted water to your lips. The both of you'd sip some down, silently regarding one another before the inevitable embrace.
You'd likely still have been there now, laid out on the blanket beneath her with your tongues entwined. A beautiful encapsulation of your heart's connection.
It would've been perfect...
Natasha caught you staring up at her, heart racing in her chest and she smiled, realizing it still could be.
"Fuck it," the redhead whispered under her breath. In two long strides she was stood right before you, leaving enough space for you to move away, but you moved right into her open arms with a radiant smile. The rain had soaked through the both of your clothes but you were warm and so content in her offered embrace.
Wonder; the look in your eyes, bright and refreshing as you stared up at your lover. Natasha's eyes were a bit murky, a silly fight going on in her stubborn mind.
"You're so pretty Natty," you giggled, a finger raised up to boop her flushed nose, "my beautiful Natasha."
The storm in her mind faded instantaneously.
Natasha was uncharacteristically nervous, even though it was near pitch black you could still see her face flushing under the bright stars. The redness on her nose from the cold trailed a bright stripe across her cheeks and you'd never seen her look more beautiful.
You sighed gently, "What's on your mind honey?" Natasha leaned more into your touch as your thumbs mindlessly stroked over her cheeks, comforting her. A stuttered breath left her lips, "C-can I kiss you detka?"
You grinned, heart racing incredibly fast as you pulled her face close enough that she could feel as you nod. A nudge to your nose and then her lips were on yours. It was like the atmosphere had thinned around you but it didn't matter, your urge to breathe was nonexistent.
If Natasha was a succubus you'd willingly submit, it was never a question you had but now it was answered. The taste of her blood should've alarmed you, but all it did was make you press your soft lips further into hers.
It was like you were trying to love her back together, kiss her until all her broken pieces fit as one again. A warmth spread through her chest and radiated off the brief smile you felt against your lips. Strong arms then wrapped around your waist until her hands could grip your hips and lift you off the ground. A continuation of the expression of her unbridled joy as she spun you.
Your legs dangled and clacked together momentarily until you followed your reflex to wrap them around her, pulling her front flush to yours; it felt natural, to finally be this close to your true love, bodies entwined.
There was no place else either of you'd like to be, even if the field was another's territory it felt like you two belonged here. At least for the time being as your relationship reached new heights; a melodic moan left you as her tongue sensually swirled around yours, her grip on your hips tightened and you both realized just how heated the moment was with your back to a tree.
Natasha's arms loosened, resting on the sides of your body now as she lowered your feet to the ground. Your head tipped back, hanging off to the side of the tree trunk, your eyes full of happiness gazed up at her.
A playful sigh left you when you saw her eyes dart to your glimmering lips. "Took you long enough, Natty."
Natasha gasped in offense, "What ever do you mean?"
"Don't get me wrong," you coo'd, hands going back up to cup her cold, wet cheeks, "This was perfect, but I just had anticipated it would happen far sooner."
"Oh," she squeaked, almost embarrassed but she steeled herself. "Mind telling me when sweetheart?"
Natasha chuckled when you shivered, a mental note made to remember how easily you react to her teasing.
"I was ready after our first date," you admitted with a dreamy sigh to follow, "It was a perfect night to me."
The redhead nods, remembering the moment too.
It was the most awkward night of her life but you only seemed to find her timid exploration of the situation endearing. When she grabbed onto your hand while in line for the massive rollercoaster you gently smiled, refusing to acknowledge the sweat coating her palms.
You wished she'd kissed you then. When she tried the cotton candy for the first time you wanted to kiss her. Seeing the glint of childish amusement in her eyes as the sugar melted on her tongue made you sentimental.
At the top of the ferris wheel, when she risked putting her arm around your shoulders you'd expected it then. Yet still, she missed the opportunity to lean in, just like she did that night when she left you at your own room.
"I thought you maybe weren't feeling me," you admitted with a regretful tone, "but then you asked me for a second date; I realized you were taking it slow."
"Wow," Natasha acknowledged, "I am an idiot."
You giggled, "It's okay Natty, truly, I appreciate the consideration you gave to our relationship so much."
"I just want this to work Y/N," she pleaded, "I need us to be endgame. Nobody else could make me happy."
"You wanna be my endgame?" Natasha nodded, and held your tilted face in her hand, then she instinctively leaned in for a kiss, stopping only briefly to whisper, "More than anything," against your parted lips.
"I want that too, Natasha." The moment was perfect.
Every single minute spent with you always was....
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angelltheninth · 11 days
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HI! I saw your requests were open and I need someone who can write some toothnumbing fluff to throw my idea out to. Hazbinxreader, either vox or Adam. Or both where they've been hooking up/dating for awhile but this time they end up make love instead w the reader confessing their feelings and vox/Adam wanting to hear it over and over since it's the firt time they've heard genuinely said to them. If u want to.go further then writing how it changes the whole dynamic of their relationship. I love these two and really need a little bit of fluff for them.
So fluff and smut too.
Pairing: Adam, Vox x Fem!Reader
Tags: nsfw, fluff, love confession, kissing, gentle sex, struggling to accept affection
A/N: Yeah, I'd say these two would have a TON of problems with genuine affection.
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Used to people saying they love him, he is a full blown narcist after all
Loving an idea of Adam and actually loving him are two different things entirely
In his own way he loves you too, but unlike you he will never say it
Thinks that stuff makes him seam soft and weak
When you say you love him during sex he never thinks much of it
Just another one of those things you say while you're full of his dick
The real meaning strikes him when you ask him to take his mask off
You want to confess to the real Adam, not his performance of an Exorcists he puts on every day
A lovely performance to be sure but you much prefer the real him
The one who goes wide-eyed and red in the face and ears when you cup his soft cheeks and pull him into a kiss as you tell him how much you love and adore him, the man beneath the mask
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Has a huge ego but he mostly built it himself
Puts himself on a high pedestal but has trouble accepting you really like him, you probably enjoy the attention that comes from dating one of the VVV
No problem with admitting he enjoys your company, he enjoys sex a lot, even skips out on work sometimes
But he can't really trust you when you tell him you love him, so you keep trying
It's never during big moments in the public eye
Always in complete privacy and after a love making session so that he doesn't think it's only the sex you love
Lies when he says he hates the way you leave lipstick marks all over his screen, he secretly loves that you leave a reminder on him
Gets defensive when other demons flirt with you, you love him right, so it should be fine if you only fuck him from now on
Turns his screen off when he senses you're about to say you love him
You don't need to see the literal heart-eyes he gets
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vampcubus · 1 year
Text
𝐊𝐍𝐘 𝐑𝐎𝐔𝐆𝐇𝐇𝐎𝐔𝐒𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐇𝐂𝐒
a/n: i had to… I HAD TO THE BRAINROT TOOK HOLD OF ME. still getting used to writing for these boys so bear with me.
:ఌ¨ ♱ 𝐂𝐇𝐀𝐑𝐀𝐂𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐒 : inosuke, zenitsu, tanjiro, kyojuro, and tengen (feat. tengen’s wives)
:ఌ¨ ♱ 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐓 𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐒 : light nsfw, spicy in places.
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𝐈𝐍𝐎𝐒𝐔𝐊𝐄 𝐇𝐀𝐒𝐇𝐈𝐁𝐈𝐑𝐀
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— HE GETS IT!! literally the best person for the job. you will not be disappointed because that’s his love language too!! 
— The moment you suggest wanting to play fight he is tackling you to the ground full force because he was waiting for you to say that!! 
— He loves it!! The cute aggression he gets around you can finally be satiated. He’s on cloud nine rolling around with you, trying his damnedest to get you in a headlock just to feel you kick your feet in protest.
— You’ll have to remind him to ease his grip and the strength he uses to toss you around, but he’s a pretty quick study! 
— You’ll really have to try to be able to pin him however, he’s as flexible as he is strong and determined to flip you on your back and proclaim his “inevitable victory” you can imagine his surprise (and heart eyes) when you’re craftier than he anticipated and manage to not only keep up with this enthusiasm but BEAT HIM. 
— Soon as that happens though he’s less interested in fighting and more interested in wrenching his mask off so he can crush his lips to yours.
— You will never be safe after that first time you roughhouse with him, any time he gets that giddy feeling in his chest around you he just pounces. It is kind of your fault for conditioning him to express his affection that way. 
— You may want to explain it to your friends however because Tanjiro is BEYOND confused. You two were having a profound moment why are you wrestling??? 😭 Zenitsu is having a freakout, trying to pry the boar man off you whilst screaming “YOU ANIMAL, WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO Y/N-CHAN!?” (though once zen’s been briefed he is immensely jealous) 
— Inosuke gets suspicious if you aren’t fighting back with your usual enthusiasm. Are you sick? mad at him? injured? He’ll get restless if you haven’t been in the mood for it lately because what do you mean you don’t want to wrestle??? >:(( don’t u love him???
— Inosuke doesn’t want to actually hurt you, of course, he knows the difference between a cry of delight and one of pain. If you make a sound implying the latter he’ll stop and check-in.
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𝐙𝐄𝐍𝐈𝐓𝐒𝐔 𝐀𝐆𝐀𝐓𝐒𝐔𝐌𝐀
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— I’ll be honest he doesn’t really understand it 😭 you’re supposed to be madly in love why do you want to fight? most of your attempts will be one-sided, the most fight you’ll get out of him is playful swatting.
— He’s also easily distracted by physical contact, so the moment you straddle his hips in an attempt to get the upper hand (which you’ll most likely already have, he really doesn’t have the heart to put it up much of a struggle) he’s melting into a puddle, hands coming to your thighs to drum absentmindedly on them—which in turn distracts you. It’s so hard to get mad at him for it too when he peers up at you with that lovestruck puppy look through thick blond lashes.
— Zenitsu definitely prefers a more “aggressive cuddling” approach than actual roughhousing, like tackling the other to the ground for some spirited nuzzling. And maybe some light-hearted games of footsie or lazily shoving at one another’s hands to see who’s stronger.
— Doesn’t help that he’s incredibly horny all the time and pinning him down just makes him feel hot, so now you’ve got that to deal with. 
— Zenitsu loves to play up the drama of it, the back of his hand pressed wistfully to his forehead as if he’s feeling faint as he performatively exclaims “Oh, be gentle with me, Y/n-chan~!“
— That usually gets you to back off with a huff of annoyance and heat in your cheeks, knowing he’d formulated the perfect foil to your cute aggression. The best way to fend you off was to make it weird.
— Putting him in a headlock just means he has an excuse to nuzzle his face against your chest, jostle him too hard and you’ll just make him cry.
— Deep down he thinks it’s a bit endearing, it’s just a love language you don’t share and that’s ok. He’ll let you rough him up, just don’t expect the same treatment. 
— To that end, you’re better off taking out your aggression on demons </3
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𝐓𝐀𝐍𝐉𝐈𝐑𝐎 𝐊𝐀𝐌𝐀𝐃𝐎
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— You’ll have to explain it to him for him to wrap his head around it, but he’s pretty open to it! He grew up with many siblings and they liked to playfully wrestle with him sometimes, he just never imagined doing something like that with you! Especially since he’s such a gentle soul and can’t imagine wanting to hurt you in any way.
— He really tries to match your enthusiasm, but all of his playful shoves and swats always end up softer than necessary. 
— Checks in constantly! “That wasn’t too rough was it?” “That didn’t hurt right?” “Ah, did I get carried away? 🥺” like bb calm down you’re doing great.
— Once he’s used to your habits he can’t help but anticipate your next sneak attack, biting his lip to conceal a smile when he notices you ready to pounce from the corner of his eye. You may think you’ve caught him unawares but he often can smell or hear your approach, but he loves to pretend anyways, just to see that triumphant grin on your face when you jump onto his back.
— Oftentimes your playful wrestling is interspersed with gentle touches. You just look so cute when you’re determined and he can’t help but caress your face in the moment <3 (he’s so soft pls i’d be crying)
— Nezuko watches the two of you play a lot and you can tell she wants to join in so sometimes you tag her in to fight at your side!!! Tanjiro is laughing so hard he can hardly breathe, overwhelmed with joy as the two most important people in his life put him through his paces.
— While he definitely prefers to express his affection in softer ways, he learns to love roughhousing with you. He knows that you only do it because you want to be close and because you trust him, and he’s content with that.
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𝐊𝐘𝐎𝐉𝐔𝐑𝐎 𝐑𝐄𝐍𝐆𝐎𝐊𝐔
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— When you first express your desire to play fight all you’ll get is a puzzled tilt of his head in return. He’ll genuinely ask you why, and when instead of explaining you get flustered he is suddenly very intrigued.
“I must confess I do enjoy that expression on your face, little flame!” (If you know you know) he all but announces to half the compound, which has your entire face boiling with embarrassment. Seeing his comment has only extended your distress, his eyes soften fondly. “Take your time.”
The best answer your monkey brain can conjure is “because I love you!” blurted out in a hurry, startling a few nearby birds into flight. No one’s quite as startled as Kyojuro however, whose face is now equally ablaze at your confession.
“And I want to be close to you,” you added, fighting through the early relationship jitters to get your point across. The best way to a healthy relationship is through communication, right? After all, Kyojuro had no right to be so damned cute all the time. It made you want to wrestle him into an embrace every time he said something unintentionally endearing—which was often!
“I think I understand!”
— Honestly, he’s a natural at it. He knows his own strength and how much he can use when tussling with you without causing any real harm. Even if you really wouldn’t mind a few token bruises to remember those silly moments by. 
— He’s a little nervous at first, he did grow up with a brother but Senjuro had always been gentle in his affections towards him. Though as soon as he sees just how much fun you’re having he’s absolutely on board! Enamored when you can’t help but giggle as you’re rolling out of reach, lunging for his sides, and jumping onto his back in an attempt to bring him to the ground.
— Most of the time between efforts of fending off your playful shoving he’s nuzzling against you, trailing kisses wherever he can reach. Laughing heartily along with you as he all too easily weakens you by attacking your sides with incessant tickling until you’re wheezing so hard you can hardly breathe.
— He rarely initiates roughhousing, but he will never deny you. It’s a great way to lift his spirits when he’s feeling down. It’s a rare occurrence, but he appreciates those small gestures the most. Close proximity and your beautiful laugh? What more could he want?
— He now knows your desire to roughhouse is a sign of affection, so he cherishes being able to let loose and play with you. Though most of the time neither of you is concerned about winning. Your playfights all too easily turn into spirited cuddling. (He’s just so loving and I- *sobs*)
— Until you decide to test some newfound strength and surprise him by flipping him flat on his back with his hands pinned to the ground. Now… now it’s different, a different kind of longing in those bright golden eyes you’ve grown to adore. One of blatant heat and desire. He always desires you but especially so when you assert yourself. 
— Does this lead to you desperately rutting against one another and tearing at your clothing? Couldn’t say. (Absolutely)
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𝐓𝐄𝐍𝐆𝐄𝐍 𝐔𝐙𝐔𝐈
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— He thinks it’s adorable that you want to roughhouse with him and will actually encourage you to try! He’s so disrespectful about it though 😭 can hold your attacks at bay with a single hand over your face. Likes to egg you on until you really want to smack him and then acts surprised when you slip out of his grip and head butt his chest full force.
“Why you little…” 
— Now the game is on! Prepare to roll around struggling for the upper hand until he feels he’s put you in your place! Instead of being discouraged by your loss, you’re more determined to win the next round.
— His instincts are razor sharp so don’t think you’ll ever truly get the jump on him with a sneak attack, even when he looks to be none the wiser. He always knows you’re there and foils your plans at the last second :(((
— You can usually get Suma and Makio in on the action and get him rumbling with laughter as you all wrestle in a pile. 
— Hinatsuru prefers to watch with a soft expression as her lovers fight and then crawl into the cuddle pile that follows as the four of you are gasping for breath. Suma always claims a place at your side afterward so she can whisper new schemes into your ear <3 she’s your partner in crime.
— Tengen could likely fend the four of you off all at once if you ever did convince Hina to join, but he loves the triumphant cheers you make when he admits defeat.
— Now if you just so happen to have even greater strength than him? He’s shutting up so fast cus please toss him around and rough him up a bit, I’m telling you he gets off on that shit—especially if you’re being “flashy” about it. Probably goes without saying that your roughhousing often turns into something else.
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tragedybunny · 8 months
Text
A Little More Than a Nibble - Astarion x F!Reader
Astarion wakes you up at camp looking for a late night snack. You both end up with something a little more. (Fluff, Angst)
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Yes I'm on the Astarion train. How can you not love him?
This short is set before Astarion's act 2 confession
Something called to you from the dark, stirring you out of sleep. Fragments of the waking world brushed against your consciousness; a dying fire, a far off owl calling, a presence hovering over you. The cold influx of terror lasts only a moment as you realize the presence is not only familiar but expected at this point. “Are you awake darling?” Astarion’s voice exudes the beguiling charm that’s become so familiar to you, familiar enough you’ve started to catch the hint of artifice that lays behind it.
Sleep-heavy eyes drift open to find him kneeling down next to you, red eyes fixed on you. The deep slumber is hard to shake off and your answer is no more than a drowsy whisper. “I am now.”
“Oh apologies my sweet but I was just wondering if…” He lets the words hang for a moment, waiting for your mind to catch up, to finish the implication. Really though it could only be about one of two things since you’re the one in camp that’s been both fucking and feeding him. And with the ungodly hour, you can easily conclude which it is.
“No luck hunting?” He deserves at least a little teasing for waking you like this.
“Actually I was thinking about you and couldn’t get the taste of you off my tongue. Would you mind terribly if I had just a little taste, just a slight nibble?” Perhaps you’ve been too indulgent with him and he’s grown used to getting his way with you, a habit you really should put to an end. If only the mere suggestion of those teeth at your neck didn’t make you quiver with excitement.
Still, it won’t do to placidly let him have his way every time. “You say slight nibble, and I wake up woozy the next morning. I fail to see what I get out of this little arrangement.”
For a moment, you think you see the slightest hint of hurt at your refusal, before he swiftly resumes his flirtatious persona. “Why, you get my gratitude and affection. Both of which are undying, I might remind you.”
It’s not the honeyed words that convince you, it’s the ghost of an emotion, the possibility of vulnerability, that there’s something beneath the mask he shows everyone, even you. Not that you would really refuse, you’re too far gone for that. Life as the daughter of a noble house of Baldur’s Gate primed you for this, to fall for a man so wrong, and dangerous, and not at all anything you should want. Rebellion after years of complicity, years of forced perfection and crafted smiles, of doing everything expected of you. The Illithid ship had given you a terrible burden, but it had also been more freedom than you’d ever known in your life. Freedom that didn’t necessarily come with inbuilt wisdom. Silently, you throw back the covers, beckoning him into the bed roll beside you. With a satisfied smile, he gracefully slides in, body pressed against yours.
The first time you’d let him do this it had been awkward, sloppy almost, a fact explained by the later revelation you were his first. Now familiarity has led to comfort, intimacy of its own sort. Different than just sex, but no less thrilling. An arm around your waist, he buries his head into the crook of your neck, lips brushing up against it in a gentle kiss first that makes you shiver before the bite.
The sharp ice of those teeth piece your skin and drive into the blood flowing in your veins. Then you feel it, the echo of your blood flowing into his veins. It had frightened you the first time but now it sends a wave of bliss through you. An involuntary sigh escapes you and you know if his mouth wasn’t full, he’d be tormenting you for how much you enjoy it. Arms loop around his shoulders, pulling him tighter against you, as though you are begging for more. You are though aren’t you? You can’t get enough of this, of him.
Drifting away, you lose yourself in him, a sweet surrender to an inexorable pull. As promised though, he’s only taken a taste when he lets up, pulling away, and licking any drops from your skin. The control he’s starting to show is impressive, even if it leaves you yearning for the strange connection of his feeding. Knowing that he never lingers after any encounter between the two of you, you unwrap your arms which feel so much heavier now, letting him go. Unexpectedly, he remains, head now resting on your chest, forehead pressed to your cheek. “Not going to eat and run?”
“In such a hurry to be rid of me?” He murmurs, his face hidden so you don’t even have a chance of reading his expression.
You’re not naive, despite what the others might believe. There’s nothing more you expect beyond what already passes between the two of you. Even if you believe you could care for him, he’s not open to you that way. Still, even if the tone is nonchalant, you feel there’s a loneliness behind it he's not quite hiding all the way. “I didn’t say that.” He doesn’t ask directly to stay and you know he won’t, so you pull the covers over the two of you and put your arms back around him and without saying another word.
With a subtle shift, you feel him get near your throat once again before stopping himself. “Perhaps I should go.”
“You don’t have to, I trust you.” Tentatively, you reach a hand up and softly stroke it through his silver hair. First he tenses, and you wait for a reproach for being too tender with him, but none comes. A moment later and you feel the tension release and he relaxes again. Your eyes are heavy, your body desperately craving sleep, but you're afraid there will never be another moment like this, with him so close, and not pushing you away. So you fight to stay conscious, and keep your fingers moving gently as long as he allows it. Sleep comes to claim you again though, and just as the world fades around you, lips brush your collarbone and the arm around your waist holds a little tighter.
The dawn comes, and the camp stirs. When you find the empty space in your bed roll, you tell yourself your heart doesn’t break a little and get ready to get on with your day.
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angelbarelywrites · 1 month
Text
♡ slashers scenarios | you’re almost a victim..
♡ fandoms; Halloween, Texas Chainsaw Massacre (2006), Black Christmas, Dead by Daylight, slashers (general)
♡ characters; Micheal Myers, Thomas Hewitt, Billy Lenz
♡ reader; gender neutral
♡ cw; very suggestive content
♡ note; i wasn’t sure how to word the title/concept of this one?? but essentially you’re almost a victim, but you’re a little to okay with it/something they do and it throws them off?? idk just read ‘em
also only 3 little meow meows in this one, i wrote most of this on break at work uwu
•┈••✦ ❤ ✦••┈•
Micheal Myers
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> he’s been stalking you for months
> in his mind you’re the perfect victim
> clueless to his presence, adorable and vulnerable
> he’s drawing it out as long as he can
> but he’s practically twitching the night you come out onto your porch in your tight pajama shorts, relaxing with some tea
> he’s got you pinned to the wall before you can even scream
> he wants to savor this, so he keeps his knife tucked away and has a massive hand around your throat
> he doesn’t miss your breath catching
> and he takes a moment to watch your chest heaving, your cheeks all flushed
> but he’s not that easily impressed. could be the lighting. maybe you’re quick to panic.
> “…you’ve been watching me.”
> you knew?
> you knew, and you still played his game
> interesting. very interesting.
Thomas Hewitt
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> Tommy boy is already giving you special treatment
> something is different about you
> he’s not sure what, you’re pretty, but he kills plenty of pretty people
> maybe something about the way you look up at him through your lashes?
> and you’re terrified now, but you weren’t scared of the initial sight of him..
> he doesn’t put you on a meat hook, instead rigging you somewhat kindly, your hands chained above your head but your bound feet on the ground
> whatever he decides on, he knows that you’re special. you deserve to be honored.
> he takes extra care in examining you, feeling you shiver as he grazes your exposed stomach - a side affect of your position, but a welcome sight
> he roughly grabs your face and pushes it left and right, pausing to rub your cheek with his thumb
> you would be a pretty face to wear
> he shoves two fingers into your mouth as he’s mentally measuring
> and he practically startles at the noise you make
> he’s never heard a sound like come from a victim- especially not his victims
> when he pushes a bit and you whimper around his fingers it confirms his suspicions. you’d given a choked moan at the initial intrusion
> he stares down at you, breathing heavily through his mask
> oh you were very special
Billy Lenz
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> you were renting a spare room in the sorority house
> while you were good friends with the girls, you valued your alone time
> you quickly became Billy’s favorite to watch, mostly because you were always home
> when he calls he always tries to time it so you pick up
> but usually the girls downstairs still answer- you’re never expecting calls so why bother?
> this evening however, he’s lucky- there’s an on campus event and you’re home completely alone
> you answer on the second ring and he’s delighted, immediately babbling profanities and filthy threats
> “gonna fuck that pretty piggy c—“
> to his surprise you giggle at him
> not a nervous sound, but genuine giggling
> before he can snap, or really even process you laughing at him, you stop him
> “yknow if you want phone sex, you can just ask nicely mister”
> he hangs up in a panic
> that was certainly the last thing he expected
> but now he’s beyond fixated on you
> he barely sleeps just to peep through your wall
> and it’s just about time he paid you a real visit
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sim0nril3y · 5 months
Note
I’m LITERALLY screaming at ghost with a praise kink !!!!!!! That was so fucking good I am foaming at the mouth!! Was that part of the 12 days of kinkmas thing? Also, side note, can we read all of these as civilian!reader? Or will the 12 days of kinkmas be outside that little au?
Also, if I may be so bold, could I request ghost with a breeding kink, perhaps? 🫣
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Note: Firstly, thank you so much for sending this request, you have no idea how much I needed to write this down! As for your questions, anything that comes before the 14th of December is totally just for fun and part of my normal writing so these types of things aren't part of the 12 Days of Kinkmas. Also, the Kinkmas will continue to be part of the Civilian series but honestly you can read my fics in whatever way makes you happy! Pairing: Simon 'Ghost' Riley x Civilian!Reader Warnings: No mask Simon (It's my personal headcanon in his regular life he probably wouldn't wear it), established relationship, teasing, breeding kink, P in v sex, lots of talk about pregnancy and knocking up, unprotected sex, canon-typical swearing.
There was no denying that Simon was in a strange mood. Where usually he rarely touched you in public now his arm was draped over your shoulder like some kind of accessory or his hand lingered on your lower back and even drifting down to cup your bum. He’d lean down and whisper into your ear, pressing a tender kiss to the hinge of your jaw. Everything he seemed to do only lead to you feeling a little warm.
It was just unlike him. Simon was usually very reserved in public, sometimes even holding your hand was too much affection for him.
All day you wracked your brain trying to figure out what had changed or what had sparked this sudden alteration in Simon’s mentality. As instructed you were stood by the hob, slowly stirring a pot of whatever Simon had prepared. You had been so deep in your thoughts you hadn’t heard Simon approaching from behind, slinking up behind you, strong arms tying around your middle and sucking you back against his form.
Those skilful lips found your throat, humming as Simon pressed a couple tender kisses to the areas of skint that were exposed. “Si, what has gotten into you lately?” You giggle was breathless, wooden spoon long forgotten in hand as your head tilted back into his shoulder. “Fuck~”
Simon continued to kiss and suckle at your throat before muttering out coldly. “Y’gonna think it’s stupid…” Then resuming his attack on your throat. “You know…” Losing track of your words as his lips nipped at your earlobe playfully. “Nothing… nothing you could say… would ever be… stupid…” The words seemed to trail away pointlessly.
For a few moments Simon remained painfully quiet, his hands roaming around your mid area, rubbing and soothing his hands against it. “Fuckin’ hell…” Like always when frustrated or a loss for words Simon growled out the expletive. “Fine…” He muttered, keeping you firmly facing away from him so that he was able to try and form a sensible sentence. “Been havin’ this dream lately…” Simon let out a low huff. “Sound so fuckin’ stupid…”
“A dream?” You quizzed, pinch forming between your brows. “What kind of dream?” “A dream… it keeps coming back…” Simon smirked. “I don’t dream ever but this one… this one won’t get out of my fuckin’ head.” Those strong hands continued to stroke and caress your stomach before finally he allowed the truth to spill from his lips. “You were pregnant.” The hands on your stomach were so soft and soothing, like trying to manifest his dream in reality. “You were pregnant with my baby… and you looked so fuckin’ good…” The word rolled off his tongue like it was dripping in sin and you knew then you were going to need to change your panties.
A big grin found your face. “Is that right?” He growled in a moment, yanking you over to bend you over the kitchen table. “Simon, the dinner-” “Don’t worry. I’ll fill you up.” Simon growled, yanking down your sweats and underwear in a quick moment. “Need to get this dream out of my head, babe. Can you… can you let me do this… please…” There was almost pleading to his tone and it caused you to rub your thighs together as you leaned over the table, his hand pressed between your shoulders.
“You can do it.” You confirmed gently and in the moments that followed Simon was kicking your legs apart to exposing your sopping cunt. “Look at this…” His hand cupped your sex, watching you shudder on the table. “Looks like you like the sound of my dream too, love.” A couple fingers slipped into your cunt, spreading your walls wide around his thick fingers and making you whimper against the table. “Is that right, baby? You want me to fill you up? Want me to pump you full of cum?”
A tight couple whimpers came from your throat. “Please. Please. Please.” You whimpered lowly, shunting your hips back to practically ride his fingers as they spread you wide. “Please, need you… need you inside me…” It was as if that was all the encouragement that Simon needed, because in the next moment he was unbuckling his belt, taking his rock hard cock in hand, massaging and rolling back the uncut skin as he pressing himself against your tight open and letting out a low groan as he sank inside, feeding you inch after inch until he reached the hilt, hips firmly pressed against your rear. “Good girl… Good fuckin’ girl takin’ every fuckin’ inch of me like I taught you.”
After allowing you a couple moments to finally adjust to his immense size Simon drew back and began to fuck into you, hard and fast, one hand braced on your shoulder whilst the other cupped under your knee to lift onto the table. “Feel… so fuckin’ good…” He growled out, teeth grit, muscles strained, wound so tight you wondered if he might snap, or if this was maybe him snapping. “Gonna look… so good filled up with me… know you’re gonna look so good, baby.”
“Simon-” “I know, baby. I know.” His hips shunted faster and shallower, hardly removing his cock halfway before shoving it back inside of you. “Fuckin’… tight cunt…” He cried out lowly. “Can’t wait… can’t wait to see you dripping… dripping with me…” Simon let out a low groan. “I’m gonna… gonna keep pumping you full… full until you’re bursting.”
The kitchen was filled with wet, slapping sounds. The sound of Simon fucking into you with so much love and adoration. The promises of a future. The prospect of having a full life together. It was enough to make your walls begin to squeeze and tighten, that and the feeling of your clit rubbing awkwardly against the table with each brutal thrust from Simon’s strong hips into your own, pistoning his thick cock relentlessly.
“There. There. There.” Your voice was begging and then following by a couple moans and squeaks as your cunt spasmed and squeezed around him. “There it is…” Simon hissed. “There it is, baby. Fuck, feel so fuckin’ good…” He growled, tilting his head back. “Tell me… Please… Tell me you want it… B-beg for it…” His hips snapped erratically, trying to stave of his own end even as your cunt milked and tried to force it from him.
“Simon~” You squeaked. “Simon… Simon, please… I need… I need your cum… I need you to fill me up… I need you to knock me up…” The words flowed so easily, unsure if you even believe them or wanted it to come true, but it seemed to be enough to throw him wildly over the edge, growling, huffing, snapping his hips aggressively and finally pumping you to the brim with his cum. It was a feeling unmatched, the warmth spreading throughout your walls leaving you humming lowly from the table. “Thank you…” Simon whispered into the air, leaning over your frame to press a couple kisses to your shoulder. “Thank you, babe.”
The two of you stood there, panting and slowly coming down from your highs, the kitchen table completely disgraced from your actions, his cum seeping out from your cunt and around his cock to seep onto the wood, the dinner completely forgotten about and burnt beyond recognition by now and the two of you left with a lot to think about.
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Masterlist | Ask | 05-12-2023
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jackactuallywrites · 2 months
Text
Purely Professional
Pairing: Simon ‘Ghost’ Riley x Female Medic Reader
Rating: Mature (nothing too explicit but dick is hinted at)
Warnings: Ghost has a boo boo 😔 (blood, facial injury - split cheek and bruising)
Summary: You are the only medic Ghost trusts to treat him. Also you guys are friends with benefits!
Notes: Yes I do always headcanon Ghost with a broken nose. It’s HOT. Also I’m cleaning out the drafts
Word Count: 1,712
ao3 link
“He’s here.”
You didn’t need to ask to know who the other medic was talking about, nodding thanks to the medic as she left, and you quickly finished up with the young woman you were patching up, “You can take ibuprofen as needed, no more than two pills at a time, and space out the dosage to every four hours.” You wrinkle your nose, “I mean, you know how to take ibuprofen, just basic over-the-counter stuff. But come back if there’s any problems.” She nods, “Thanks, Doc.” You weren’t sure how many times you’d specified the difference between a combat medic and a military doctor, but at this point, it wasn’t worth the air, so you just nodded, gesturing for her to take her leave, “Anytime.” She grabbed the pillbox and made her way out of the room, leaving you to clean up the empty wrappings, tossing them into the nearby bin. You tore off the paper that was covering the bed, binning it as well and then rolling out another cover, making sure everything was fresh and clean. When you were satisfied, you walked out of the room into the waiting room, your eyes immediately landing on the one man who didn’t need to be named.
Ghost.
The intensity of his gaze was intimidating, his dark eyes glowering from underneath the skull mask as though he wanted nothing more than to take down every single person who dared to breathe the same air as him. At this point, the other medics had learned that he wouldn’t accept their help, refusing to utter even a single word until you were free. You leaned against the frame of the door that led into the hallway, beckoning him with a jerk of your head. He rose from his seat, seeming to dwarf everyone else around him as he walked through the room toward you, brushing past you without a word and striding straight into the open examination room, the cold silence seeming to emanate off him like a tangible aura, visibly affecting those around him, the other medics shrinking away from him as he passed.
You followed him into the room, closing the door behind you, “So, what can I help you with today, Lieutenant?” He sat down on the bed in the room, resting one forearm on his thigh, gesturing with the other hand to his face, consistently a man of few words. You stepped closer to him, “You’re going to have to give me a little more than that.” He grunted, reaching up to take off his helmet, setting it on the bed beside him, and then unclipping the skull mask, revealing the balaclava underneath. Finally, he pulled off the balaclava, revealing his clipped blond hair, and then his face, bruised and bloody, his cheek split open, blood already dried to his skin. His eyes, thankfully untouched, the black paint surrounding them unmarred, were on you, boring into your face as he watched you.
You didn’t waste time, reaching out to probe his face, your fingers gently holding onto his chin as you turned his head from side to side, inspecting the damage. It looked worse than it was; facial injuries always bled more, and though he tensed when you gently pressed his cheek, there was no sign of anything broken. After taking a moment just to be sure, you drew back from him, walking to the medical cupboard and taking out an antiseptic wipe, talking as you did, “You won’t need stitches.” He grunted, and you took this as permission to begin wiping the blood away from his face.
“So,” you began, always one to make idle chitchat as you worked, “who did you piss off this time?” Ghost watched you, his face solemn, searching your eyes before he responded, his voice barely more than a whisper, “Couple guys.” You smiled as you brushed the wipe over his split skin, “You know if you want to see me, you only have to ask.”
All the tension in his face seemed to ease then, his eyes softening as he looked up at you, “I know.” You took this as permission, gently nudging his legs open so you could stand in between them, closing the distance between you, allowing him to reach out in his own time, and after a brief moment, he did, his hands reaching out to gently rest on your hips, his fingers hesitant, still unused to the intimacy you shared. You cleaned up the rest of the blood on his cheek, giving him time to get used to your close proximity as you brought out a small plaster to cover his wound. In a moment of impulsivity, you pressed a gentle kiss to his damaged cheek, your reward his sharp intake of breath and the tightening of his fingers on your hips, pulling you closer toward him.
“You know,” you began, letting your hands rest on his shoulders, “the other medics are going to think you’re sweet on me.” Ghost let his face rest in the crook of your neck, his voice low, muffled by your shoulder, “I’m not sweet.” You smiled, letting your fingers trace over from his shoulders to the back of his neck, “No? What would you call this?” “Desperate.”
There was no mistaking the longing in his voice, the yearning, the way his fingers pulled you closer to him until your body was pressed against his. Already, his fingers were pulling at your shirt, just like he’d done so many times before, secretive fumbles in whatever vehicle or armoury was nearest, all beginning with some injury he only allowed you to treat, all ending with you wrapped up in his arms. You smiled, shifting one hand to stop his fingers on their insistent path underneath your shirt, “I think they’ll notice if I spend forty minutes in here with you.” Ghost didn’t seem entirely put off by the idea, his face tilting up as his lips began to move over your neck, gently nipping at the skin, his voice husky, “You love this being our dirty little secret, don’t you?”
It was impossible for you to lie to him; after all, he was special forces; no doubt he could sniff out every last secret of yours if he truly wanted to. His hand was already moving from your hip up to your cheek, forcing you to look at him as he pulled away from your neck, his pale eyes searching yours, “Admit it.” Every part of you seemed desperate to touch and be touched by him, and you held back a groan, “Yes. Which is why we can’t do anything in here.” His lips quirked in a smirk, “We wouldn’t want them to think you give this treatment to everyone.” You smiled, “I am supposed to be a professional, after all.” His thumb reached out to brush your cheek, “Couldn’t we both use a little unprofessionalism right now?”
The idea was tempting. Too tempting. You could feel those eyes of his melting away your resolve, and you shifted your weight from one foot to the other, biting the inside of your cheek, “What exactly did you have in mind?” There was a wicked look in his eyes, luring you into sin, to submit yourself to his will entirely, “What I have in mind would make too much of a mess and needs more time than we have.” You tilted your head to the side, curious, “So what do we do?” He was quiet for a moment, his eyes flicking over every single facet of your face, your eyes, your cheeks, your lips. He leaned into you, his nose bumping against yours, letting you feel that little ridge where it had been broken. His words were a murmur against your skin, softer than he ever seemed capable of, “I’ll be content with a kiss for now.”
It never seemed to make sense that a devil could be so sweet; you knew what he was capable of, you’d patched him up, you’d seen his medical records detailing what he’d been through, yet here he was, asking you for that simplest of intimacies. You obliged his simple request, leaning forward to press your lips against his, feeling the slight stubble on his skin prickle yours, his hand shifting from your cheek to the back of your neck, the one on your hip moving to the small of your back to pull you closer to him, encircling your body, his lips soft against yours, yet insistent, needy. He pulled away before you, leaning his forehead against yours, letting out a strained sigh, his hand moving from your back to his crotch, adjusting his trousers to disguise the growing bulge there. “The things you do to me.” His voice held some frustration, his fingers tightening on the back of your neck but loosening just as quickly, always in complete control of himself.
You could see the Lieutenant return, the way his back straightened, the grim determination returning to his lips. His hands fell away from your body, reaching for the balaclava and mask he’d put to the side, and you knew your time with him was coming to a close. You stepped back from him, tucking in your shirt, allowing him to resume that persona, covering his bruised face with the black balaclava and then finishing with clipping his skull mask back into place, his helmet finishing the transformation. All that remained of him were those soft eyes, out of place, surrounded by blackness. He reached up with one hand to tuck a loose hair back under your beret, his gloved fingers gently stroking against your cheek. “I’ll be seeing you.”
There was no doubt that he would find you to finish what you’d started here, but for now, he was back to business, standing up off the table and straightening out his uniform. You crossed the room to open the door for him, allowing the outside world view into your privacy, not that there was anything for them to see. He stalked past you without a word, yet as he passed, his hand reached out to gently squeeze your arse, sending tingles up your spine as he left you wanting, trying hard not to look like a lovesick dog as you watched him go.
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fhrlclln · 10 months
Text
miguel o’hara x spider!fem! reader
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just a bit of angst for experimental reasons guys… i’m sorry in advance <3
the lore im basing off is solely on the background story of miguel in the movie and a lil bit from the 928 miguel, so please mind me for switching it up, my loves!!
miguel is harsh but harsher towards you when you’re practically one of the first and loyal spider members to the league. why?
angst under the cut
。・:*˚:✧。
miguel was harsh. rude, sassy, overly harsh but everyone got to experience that kind of attitude of his. not until that attitude went overboard with you. you didn’t know why or how this started but you knew miguel’s attitude of being snappy and that was kind of his way of showing a little affection. but to you, to you none of that was that. he was more cold, more snappy, more overly dismissive of you everyday since jess had recruited you and you didn’t know why.
your dimension was a variant of miguel’s as well, both of you are from nueva york. scientists at alchemax and in your dimension, he was just an ordinary colleague of yours. except that, this time you weren’t a mutant-spider hybrid like miguel is, but more that you were actually bitten by a radioactive spider and the rest was history from then when an anomaly from another dimension had gone to yours, thus meeting the leader himself and jess. which was a total surprise that you learned another miguel o’hara was spiderman as well.
“that’s all?” miguel asks, snapping you out of your thoughts.
“yeah.” you nodded awkwardly, tensed a bit, you had just reported to him about your mission you were assigned on. you stare at his back, seeing him flick away from his screen as you sighed, this bubble in your throat threatening to burst. the miguel you knew wasn’t like this a bit, sure he was still an asshole but this miguel was worser. the only time he was nice is when he softly told you that you can join the spider-society after jess had introduced you to him.
“leave me.” miguel says with no thank you of whatsoever, just pure coldness. you frown, wishing he would just try and be more a little civilized towards you. your mouth opens slightly, brows furrowed as you wanted to say something but you held back, still staring at his back, his movements were calculated as he didn’t notice you further. your feet sank to the ground as you nodded, the bitterness in your heart making your lips tremble underneath your mask as you guided yourself out of his lab.
jess watches from the shadows with great amount of displeasure as she glances up to miguel. you walked away, shoulders sunken and she could tell you were trying to hold yourself back at his attitude towards you.
“you can’t ignore her forever, miguel.” jess speaks up. miguel stills, glancing to his side as he rolls his eyes.
“it’s none of your business.” he deadpans, intent to not hear what jess has to say. she sighs, leaving the lab as well.
“at some point, she has to know.” jess quietly tells him before she leaves. he merely stays quiet, the sound of the footage he has been playing echoing his lonely lab. his fingers tap on their own on instinct when he’s alone as one video pops up to give him that feeling of that once happy time he had.
“look, papa!” his heart sinks hearing his little daughter’s voice. he looks happy back then, smiling, with cream on his face as his kid smiles with him when he puts her down. a pleasant memory to fill the void in his heart as he yearns for it again. the sound of little laughter, the feel of warmth around his heart, that same feeling of sweet happiness back then. love was there and regret was yet to overcome him.
“what are you doing? get in the video. mija, tell mama to join us.” his other self laughs as he looks behind the camera, miguel’s heart surges as the camera shakes for a moment. he watches, breath stilling, always readying for the next part as he tried to not dwell on the grieving feeling when he watches it.
“mama! come on!” he smiles for a bit, just barely.
“alright! wait, lemme just—“ your voice cuts in. his heart drops when you turn the camera over to you three now. all smiling as you kiss miguel on the cheek, teasing him for the cream on his face. miguel’s eyes train on yours, your smile was radiant as ever, same smile you had when he watches you sometimes when you talk alongside your fellow spider friends here.
“say cheese!” you cooed in the video, kissing your daughter on the head as the other miguel smiles widely, leaning against you. his heart sinks as his lips tremble, his fists clench when he remembers the first time he saw you again after both you and gabriella had died in his arms. he landed in your dimension when he was tracking that same anomaly, you were fighting alongside him, defeating the anomaly that had landed in your dimension. his first instinct was to sweep you up in his arms but he held himself back, knowing what further damage might do if he even gets close to you remembering how selfish he was taking place of the dimension the former miguel had. taking his place as your husband and the father to his child.
but was it so wrong knowing that in another world that it was possible for him to be happy?
he doesn’t know. and he makes sure to stay it that way no matter how he knows he puts much distance between the two of you since you joined the spider-society in the early days. the video ends as miguel shooks his head to clear his thoughts as he looks back to where you exited, a sinking feeling in his chest, urges he denies inside his head as he remembers what would happen if something between the two of you would transpire. he loves you, but he hopes that you wouldn’t know it. he hopes that you’d accept that his way of being a major asshole was in-order to protect you.
“she can’t know.” he mumbles underneath his breath, hands covering his tired face, his broken heart already torn to pieces as grief fills it in. convincing himself this is the only way for you to live.
you can’t know.
。・:*˚:✧。
IM SORRY. my next fics are spicy so stay tune <3
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mandosaur · 10 months
Text
New Rules (Miguel O'Hara / Reader)
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Fandom: Across the Spider-Verse
Pairing: Miguel O'Hara / Reader
Word Count: 11,320
Estimated Reading Time: 40:58
Summary:
“No.”
Her voice is firm and she jabs a finger at your chest.
“Do not do that. Hit ignore. Block him. Toss the thing at the wall. Do not answer.”
Lyla calls again and sends an alert that Miguel is trying to contact you.
“Hit ignore! Don’t do it!” Gia reaches out for your watch.
You stand abruptly. It’s a stupid, stupid choice. You know it is. Gia is right, you should just chuck the thing in a garbage bag.
But you still fish your phone out of Gia’s purse and toss some cash at the bar.
“I’m sorry,” you apologize.
Your on and off again friends with benefits arrangement with Miguel comes to a close, but you just can’t seem to let him go.
Loosely based off “New Rules” by Dua Lipa.
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“One: Don't pick up the phone You know he's only callin' 'cause he's drunk and alone Two: Don't let him in You'll have to kick him out again Three: Don't be his friend You know you're gonna wake up in his bed in the morning And if you're under him, you ain't gettin' over him.” “New Rules” by Dua Lipa.
—————
The outfit you’ve picked out for yourself tonight looks great. It’s a red little number that’s been in your closet for ages aching to be worn. You weren’t sure when you bought it how it would look like on you, but it makes you feel great when you catch a sight of yourself in the mirror. You look attractive, hot, and it steels some of your resolve as you head down to where you and your friend agreed to meet.
If you were being honest, you’ve really needed a confidence boost these past few days. The heart ache nestled deep in your chest wouldn’t go away and simply touring New York looking for villains of the week to fight wasn’t cutting it.
A sigh leaves your lips as you find yourself in a bar downtown. Gia, your roommate, has selected a bar for you both to have dinner at. It’s relatively quiet tonight with only a handful of people, yet it still offers plenty of distraction. You may not have been enthusiastic about going out, but you can appreciate having something else to put your mind to.
Although you can’t tell Gia the truth about your recent stint with heartbreak, she knows the details. She knows you had a little fling going on with a guy who checked all your boxes but just wasn’t willing to commit. He’d take you into his bed then leave before the sun rose. It was a never ending push and pull.
Gia didn’t understand why you couldn’t just block the guy and be done with it. She had already chastised you for your “lack of self control” and “frustrating addiction” to pain.
Of course, she didn’t know Miguel.
Miguel. The man who had come into your universe and invited you into his elite little Spider-Man task force to hunt for anomalies. The man who seemed to understand what loss was better than anyone and made you feel seen. Perhaps the only person who knew you better than you.
Gia didn’t get the song and dance you had around him because she didn’t know what it was like to exist as a masked vigilante losing everyone around you. She didn’t know how lonely it was or how sometimes you couldn’t tell who was under the mask. Or if there even was a part of you left that wasn’t just tied to your responsibilities as a hero.
Miguel was the only one who got you. The two of you had clicked like puzzle pieces after meeting. He favored you over the others and had moments where he seemed like he loved you back. Being with him was like finally finding a piece of yourself that you hadn’t realized was missing.
When the two of you had started sleeping together, you had been hopeful. Perhaps the little arrangement between you both would lead to something new. Hell, there had been plenty of moments where he had seemed softer outside of the bedroom and quite a few times you’d catch him staring with a look of affection-
But then everything would go wrong. The moment the two of you got close outside of a biblical sense, he’d pull back. Close you out and end things with you. You’d go days without speaking to each other feeling miserable and heart broken only to be suddenly called back by him.
He’d pull you back in like a magnet and sleep with you over and over again until the next time you ventured too close and he shoved you aside once more.
It was a very painful back and forth, yet you couldn’t find it in you to end things permanently. Not when he took up a large part of your heart, and not when he was your boss of all things.
Currently, you were on the outs again. He’d called it off a few days ago after a bad mission. He’d come back to HQ in a horrible mood and everyone else had suffered for it. When you’d walked up to his office to check in on him, he had snapped at you to leave. His words had been harsh and cold. He had ordered you to stop acting like his girlfriend, constantly checking in and taking care of him like a child, and reminded you that nothing existed between you other than two adults satisfying some urges.
His words had been a blow to your heart and you had left HQ suppressing tears. Gwen and Hobie had watched you go with sympathy, and Jess had mercifully delayed your missions for a while to give you time to recover. Either that or Miguel had ordered her to keep you away from him.
So, naturally, your best friend had suggested you go out for some drinks. Gia didn’t know about your alter ego or quite who Miguel was, but she knew enough to declare him undeserving of you and promised you’d find someone else.
You look up briefly when Gia arrives. She looks stunning in the neon dress she’s wearing and has done her hair in an elaborate style. There’s a happy grin on her face as she slides in the booth opposite of you and you envy her joy.
She calls your name and hugs you over the table.
“You look hot today!” She remarks.
You offer her your best smile which isn’t much. Already, you can feel some of your earlier apprehension return. You have no energy to be out and about with people. Tonight would have been so much better had you been able to curl up in bed with a box of tissues and some ice cream.
“Meet any cute people?” Gia asks. She rummages through the fries you’ve ordered while scanning the bar.
There’s a group of guys in one corner who eye her with appreciation. You think you catch one looking at you too, but you turn away uninterested. The guy seems handsome, but his eyes aren’t red and he doesn’t have two sets of fangs. He’s not the one you desperately want.
“I’m not feeling too social today,” you admit. You twirl your straw wrapper pensively.
Gia gives you a look with a deadpan expression. You know what she’s thinking. She finds it frustrating you can’t just let Miguel go. She doesn’t get why you’re so hung up on him.
But you are. You genuinely have fallen for him in your time working together. He’s showed you parts of him he’s never showed others. He’s told you about Gaby and how he raised her as a single father in her dimension for months before losing her. He’s told you about how he got his powers and the doubts that come with it. He’s shared his canon events with you and opened up to you about the stress he’s in with holding up the entire multiverse.
He’s let you in where he’s shut others out. You know he feels something for you, are sure of it deep in your bones, but he’s just not willing to admit it to himself. That’s what makes it all so frustrating. Loving someone who doesn’t love you back is torture, but loving someone who does yet won’t allow it for themselves is a death sentence.
Gia sighs and the sound rouses you out of your thoughts. She pinches the bridge of her nose and closes her eyes tightly.
“You have really got to get back out there, babe. He’s not the only man in the world. He’s not adding to your life,” she shakes her head.
You look down at your hands.
“You know I can’t,” you murmur.
A part of you wishes you could. If you could flick a switch and let him go, you’d do it. You’d be better off forgetting all about him. It would save you so much heart ache, but your feelings run deep. He’s captured you completely, tangled you up in his web, and you can’t let him go.
Gia thrusts a hand out at you with a look of impatience. She wiggles her fingers and waits expectantly.
“Gia-“
“Ah, ah, you know the drill. Phone.”
You give her a glare but pass your phone over. Gia has insisted on confiscating it since your last break up. She doesn’t want you to be tempted to call Miguel. Of course, your watch is the only real way to connect with him because of the differences in universes, but you’re certainly not going to tell her that.
Instead, you purse your lips when she slides your phone into her purse and watch as she leans forward. She has a gleam in her eye when she surveys the bar. She’s watching every person carefully trying to assess who’s worth your time.
Eventually, she zeroes in on the guy from before. He’s broken off with his friends and is now sitting alone at the bar. Nursing a glass of something amber, he catches Gia’s eye as he throws another look your way.
You don’t even have time to react before Gia is yanking you up by your hand. She’s pitching you forward before you can even blink. You half wonder if she’s the one with superpowers and not you when you suddenly find yourself in front of the guy.
Gia waves the bartender forward and not so subtly shoves you towards the guy. You catch yourself on his chair with a hiss of her name.
“You alright?” The stranger blinks up at you in surprise.
“I am so sorry,” you hold your hands up, “My friend is drunk-“
Gia swoops in and tosses an arm around your shoulder. She has the same mischievous grin she wore back in college every time she had some idea terrible she was cooking up. It’s gotten you into some trouble before and scares you now.
“Hey, you look like you could use some company. My friend here just left her asshole ex. Why don’t you two catch up while I get us some drinks?” She pats your shoulder and is gone in a whirlwind of energy.
You could melt into the floor out of humiliation.
“OhgodGia,” you groan. You don’t even want to look at the stranger out of sheer embarrassment.
The stranger coughs lightly in surprise before offering you a smile. He blinks in Gia’s wake before offering his hand.
“Oh wow,” he remarks with his own blush, “Well that was subtle. But, please, sit. I-My name is Tyler.”
Knowing that Gia will kill you if you don’t at least try, you slide into the stool next to him slowly. Maybe if you entertain him for a few minutes you can satisfy Gia and convince her to take you home. Then you can proceed to strangle her in a dark alleyway away from witnesses for putting you in this situation.
“I am really sorry about her-again. She means well she’s just a lot,” you run a hand down your face and introduce yourself with your name.
The stranger, Tyler, seems friendly at least. He grins easily at you with his own embarrassment. You can tell Gia has put him on the spot too. At least the two of you have that in common.
“Well, at least she broke the ice for me. I saw you a while ago and thought you were really pretty. My own friends were teasing me too,” he offers.
You wave down the bartender and place an order. You definitely won’t get through Hurricane Gia without a drink.
“So, a break up?” Tyler offers a sympathetic smile, “Been there. I just broke up with my fiancée a few months ago. I think I spent an entire month living off of frozen pizza rolls and watching terrible documentaries just to take the edge off. I definitely know how awful it feels.”
His words put you at ease some. You swirl the ice around your glass.
“Breakup is maybe not the right word. We weren’t really together. I wanted more and he didn’t.”
It hurts to say it out loud. It sounds so pathetic when you put it that way, but you can’t help it. The truth is a brutal knife to the ribs.
Tyler makes a noise of sympathy.
“Well, he didn’t know what he missed out on. It’s his loss,” he lifts his glass to you.
You glance away and see Gia staring from your old table. She mouths for you to keep going. You flip her off when Tyler turns around.
“I’m really sorry about my friend. She’s determined that the way to get over heartache is to find someone else. I’m not really interested in that,” you admit. Better to lay your cards out now.
Tyler leans in like he’s about to tell you a secret.
“Don’t worry, I’m not either. My friends dragged me here tonight too. The one in the gray suit is getting married next month and wanted a chill night out. I’m not here to meet someone. It’s too soon, but maybe we can be friends? Breakup buddies and all that.”
He offers you his cellphone and asks for your number. You bite your lip but decide to take the plunge. Why not? It’s not like you owe any loyalty to anyone.
Once you’ve exchanged information, Tyler’s friends call him over. They’ve decided to move on to another bar across town. Tyler has no choice but to go.
He gets up and gives you a friendly wave.
“Don’t be a stranger,” he turns around then hesitates and turns back to you, “And, for the record, that ex of yours is an idiot. I wouldn’t have let someone like you go.”
Once he’s gone and you’re feeling bashful again, Gia slides into the seat he just occupied. She’s munching on fries like she didn’t just humiliate you. You aim a hard kick to her shin and feel better when she shrieks.
“Never do that to me again,” you warn.
She doesn’t promise you that. Instead, she presses you for info on Tyler.
“You two going on a date soon?” She urges.
“He just got out of a breakup too. He’s not interested either. I’m not going out with anyone.”
Gia sighs.
“Look, the important thing is that you let this mystery guy of yours go. This on and off thing is for high schoolers who haven’t developed their prefrontal cortex and have zero impulse control. You’re an adult. I don’t want to see you so broken up about him. You need to get him out of your system.”
You look away.
It sounds easy, you admit, but forgetting Miguel isn’t an option. He invaded your senses. You remember what it’s like to be held and kissed by him every time you try and push him aside. You remember the way he laughs when you manage to crack through his walls, the way he smiles when he thinks you aren’t looking, and the way his voice gets softer when you call. Even if he’s been yelling at someone moments before, his voice always gets soft when you appear.
He loves you. You know it. He probably knows it. Everyone in the agency knows it. It’s just that he’s not willing to take that final plunge.
Before you can say anything more, your watch begins to glow. Lyla is trying to patch a call through.
Gia doesn’t know much about your watch, but she knows enough to guess you’re being called. She narrows her eyes at you when she sees the way your body tenses.
“No.”
Her voice is firm and she jabs a finger at your chest.
“Do not do that. Hit ignore. Block him. Toss the thing at the wall. Do not answer.”
Lyla calls again and sends an alert that Miguel is trying to contact you.
“Hit ignore! Don’t do it!” Gia reaches out for your watch.
You stand abruptly. It’s a stupid, stupid choice. You know it is. Gia is right, you should just chuck the thing in a garbage bag.
But you still fish your phone out of Gia’s purse and toss some cash at the bar.
“I’m sorry,” you apologize.
The look Gia gives you is murderous. She puts her head in her hands like she’s fed up with you. In her place, you’d probably be fed up too.
Still, you slip out the bar and hit your watch. A little projection of Lyla appears as you duck into a secluded area.
“Lyla?” You tilt your head.
Lyla hums, “Miguel wants you at his office. Says he hasn’t seen you in a while. Poor Miggy is worried for you. You don’t usually spend so much time away from HQ.”
She patches a portal for you. You look around to make sure you aren’t being watched then slide in. Gia will definitely tear you a new one for this tomorrow, but can’t resist the urge not to go back to him.
———————————————
Miguel is standing by his computer when you arrive. He’s reading some reports when you pop in. His eyes glance at you as you emerge and his eyes widen.
You’re still in your outfit from the bar. It’s a little ego boost to see the way his eyes scan you from inch to inch. If nothing else, you can find comfort in the fact that you still have the power to drive him crazy.
“You called?” You voice.
HQ is empty this time of night. Most people are either back in their own universe or staying in some of the dorms on the other side of the building. For now, it’s just you and Miguel.
Some anticipation builds in your stomach. This is how a lot of your late night meetings have started.
Miguel straightens up from his chair. You don’t miss the way he swallows when he sees you.
“Did I interrupt something?”
You can’t be sure but maybe there’s just the hint of an edge to his voice. He sounds a little miffed, like he’s jealous. It’s a nice change from his usual aloofness with you.
“I went out for drinks,” you admit, “What is it?”
It’s been days since you’ve last seen him and you missed him. It’s so easy to miss him. He has a hold on you that you can’t possibly escape from. He’s magnetic without trying, has a good heart even if he hides it behind a facade of anger and coldness, and he cares about people. He’s a good person. You’ve glimpsed it all and have fallen hard. Being without him hurts more than any broken bone or injury.
Miguel hesitates when he looks at you. You take stock of him.
He has dark circles under his eyes and looks stressed. A part of you hopes it’s because your last argument has also been keeping him up. If you aren’t the only one hurting, you think it’ll make you feel better. Then again, there’s a mountain of paperwork on his desk and his computer has a ton of messages unread. Maybe it’s less you and more the job itself that has kept him up.
“Jess said you needed a few days off because you weren’t feeling well. I just wanted to make sure you were healthy,” he turns away from you, “Yet I’m sure you are. If you can go around drinking, you can go on a mission.”
A prickle of irritation fills you.
“Did you just call me here because of that? This could have been an email.”
You hope your face doesn’t show the disappointment you feel. For a second, you had been expecting him to have changed. To have admitted he was wrong and hadn’t treated you fairly. Then again, this was Miguel. Miguel wasn’t exactly known for being sentimental or emotional.
“What else is there?” He doesn’t even turn around before he’s at his computer, “I’m assigning you a case this week. Your little vacation is over. You’re dismissed.”
Indignation fills you. You shake your head firmly.
“Come on, Miguel. Give me a little more than that. I haven’t seen you in days and all you do is assign me more work? That’s it?”
You step forward towards him.
He turns around and glares. His eyes flash with a warning.
“That’s it. Go.”
He’s got the voice he uses for the other recruits. The one you’ve heard him scold Hobie and Peter B. in plenty of times. It’s not one he tends to use on you, and you bristle.
“Why did you call me here? Lyla wouldn’t open a portal for me if it was just for work.”
Miguel’s jaw is clenched.
“Well she did that without me asking. I didn’t want you here.”
His words are a blow to the stomach, and your anger grows. You jab a finger at him and glare.
“You’re not even going to apologize? You insult me days ago then want to be professional again without apologizing-“
“Why would I apologize?” His own anger is rising, “I meant what I said. You knew what this was when we started. I’m not sorry you forgot.”
A huff leaves your lips. You shake your head and take another step forward.
“You’re unbelievable.”
“And you’re annoying.”
You meet each other half way. His face is clouded with anger. You can feel your heart race in your chest from you own rage.
“I can’t believe you won’t admit that you want more between us.”
“And I can’t believe you’re testing my self control showing up here in this dress and pointing a finger at me,” he retorts. His eyes go down to your lips. You can sense what he’s about to do.
You lean in first and he devours you. The kiss is full of fire and anger. You’re both pent up and stressed. It burns and consumes you in a way you’ve been longing.
Anger fuels you and you take his hair in your hand giving it a firm tug earning a hiss from him. He picks you up and sets you on a nearby desk. The files scatter on the ground. Neither of you notice.
“You’re not going to apologize?” You hiss it between breaths.
He makes a sound at the back of his throat, “I’ve got nothing to apologize for. My intentions were always clear.”
His mouth goes for your throat. Your rebuke is lost as his hands begin to inch under your dress. The words he’s spitting out at you hurt, but his fingers soothe the sting when he explores your body.
This is a mistake. Gia is right. You should shove him off you and walk away. You’ll never get over him if you’re still sleeping with him, yet you can’t seem to do that. Your body amidst the haze of ecstasy won’t allow it.
Instead, you close your eyes and give in. You let him fuck you in his office all while telling yourself you’ll deal with the fallout in the morning. You don’t think of the consequences or how much this will hurt when the sun rises-
And it does.
It hurts like hell when you blink awake after dozing off in his chair and find him gone in the morning. He’s left for the day and a note near you is the only thing he leaves behind. You read it then throw it into the waste bin with tears running down your face.
In his messy scrawl he’s written, THIS CHANGES NOTHING.
———————————————
Gia has her arms crossed when you return to your shared apartment. She knows where you’ve been. She can see it in the bites he’s left along your neck and shoulders. The walk of shame you just took burns.
“You slept with him, huh?” Her eyes are narrowed in annoyance.
You sign and bury your head in your hands. She isn’t done with you yet. Her judgement feels thick against your skin.
“And he left again, huh? Right after he got what he wanted.”
The question makes you cry. You burst into tears feeling regret and heartbreak. Gia sighs and her gaze softens. She wraps her arms around you and holds you close.
What’s worse is that the pain of his rejection doesn’t hold a candle to the pain of missing him. It’s illogical and pathetic, but you and Gia both know this won’t be the last time you make this same mistake.
And it isn’t.
Days later, he appears at your doorstep and you welcome him into your bed again.
———————————————
Days after that encounter, you open the door to find Miguel bleeding in the hallway. He has a large gash across his side that looks painful. He stumbles inside before you can even react.
“Miguel?”
You close the door behind you as he hisses in pain.
“I-I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have come, but I need a first aid kit,” he groans.
You’re grateful Gia isn’t here. You don’t think you could explain why Miguel is bleeding in his spider suit. That or why you let your ex back inside again.
Deciding to shelve your personal feelings, you hurry him over to the kitchen and set him down on a chair. There’s a first aid kit under the sink. You’ve used it plenty of times before when you come back from fighting crime.
Miguel is strong and puts on a brave face as you go about patching him up. The gash at his side is the worst one, but his knuckles are also bleeding and there’s a tiny cut on the side of his chin that looks painful too. It doesn’t look like he’ll need stitches, but it does look bad.
“What happened?” You look up at him.
“Anomaly. I took it down, but it got me on the side. I didn’t even think before coming here. I’m sorry.”
He looks away as you work. You wish you could tell what thoughts are running through his mind. Your own are consumed with the fact that he’s here.
HQ was just a click of the watch away. Lyla could have called him to the medics there and gotten him help. Why had he showed up at your place? You haven’t spoken since the night at his office.
The memory of it stings and you purse your lips.
This is probably a mistake. The second mistake you’ve made this week. Things won’t end well if you don’t develop a sense of self control, but you’re not sure you want to let go. Despite everything, there’s still a little nag of hope that’s rooted itself deep into your heart. You don’t want to give up.
“You weren’t at HQ these past few days either,” Miguel speaks up. He suppresses a wince when you finish his side. The skin there is already starting to heal over. A testament to his powers.
The bruises on his knuckles look worse than they are. It takes just a bit of treatment to get them to start healing too. Soon, the cuts are just dark bruises.
“I did my mission. I let Hobie do the report for me,” you explain.
The mission he had assigned you on had been easy. You and Hobie had taken the anomaly down without question. It was just another villain of the week. At the end, Hobie had offered to go back to HQ without you to check in with Jess and Miguel. You had fled back to your universe certain that you couldn’t face people there just yet.
A muscle on his jaw works as he tightens it, “You don’t have to avoid me. I’m sorry for what happened earlier.”
His words make you ache. You hate feeling this way. Always dancing around the truth but never able to fully face it.
The final cut he has is on his chin. You have to look at his face to tend to it. His eyes are trained on you and the depths there take your breath away.
There’s trepidation and nervousness there along with something else. It’s soft and meek like he’s trying to shield it. You think it’s a cross between longing and affection.
He does love you too. You believe it strongly. He just doesn’t want to admit it. Miguel is the kind of man who can face hordes of villains and never falter, but ask him to open up and share his feelings and he panics. He can’t even be honest with himself.
Your fingers trace the planes of his face as you apply a thin layer of ointment on the cut.
“I thought that’s what you wanted,” you whisper. It always seemed like he wanted you as far away from himself as possible. You had agreed to give him that even if it slowly killed you, “Why did you come here tonight? Really?”
Lyla wouldn’t have sent him to you if he hadn’t asked. For all of her teasing of him, she is mostly obedient. She would know not to send him where he doesn’t want to. The fact that he came to your door means a part of him did.
Why? Why tell you to keep your distance then show up at your home anyway? Could there also be a part of him that finds you just as impossible to be away from? Or are you clinging to him and seeing what isn’t there?
A faint trace of color has spread through his face. You blink. Without realizing it, your fingers have been stroking his chin. It’s such a habit that you never even noticed it.
An apology forms on your lips and you drop you hand before he intercepts it. He takes your hand in his and stares down at it. The muscle in his jaw works again.
“I wanted to see you. Hobie said you had been injured on your mission. I nearly came here then and there,” he admits. It’s a quiet breath into the night like he can’t believe he’s admitting it. Your heart picks up.
The injury in question had been a simple broken rib. Your powers come with accelerated healing. By the time you had noticed it, it had already started repairing itself. Hobie and Miguel both know this, yet he had been worried. A part of you dares to hope again.
And then you remember the way he had left you in his office. The note that had broken your heart. The way he took and never gave anything back. An ugly feeling twists in the pit of your stomach.
“I really don’t know why you’re doing this to me,” you breathe out.
It hurts to be led on. It hurts to be discarded. Maybe Gia is right. Maybe you should just let go. Resign from the agency and ignore the thought of him forever.
You pull your hand free and turn around. His eyes follow you as you begin to pack your first aid kit.
When he calls your name, his voice is soft and hesitant. It fills you with a yearning that aches.
“I don’t want to hurt you,” he admits, “We just can’t-“
“We can’t? Or you can’t?”
Miguel is brave but there is one fear he can never face. He’s lost so much already and is afraid of losing more. That’s why he keeps people at an arm’s reach. No one is allowed into his heart because he’s lost everyone thus far. His own daughter, or at least in another universe, had disappeared in his arms. He won’t let anyone else in.
A rational part of you knows it. You know he’s pushing you away because he’s scared. He doesn’t want to lose you to the danger of your jobs or the universe that keeps you apart-
But doesn’t he see that he’s losing you anyway? That pushing you away is slowly killing your worse than a villain ever could?
By the time you turn around to look at him, you are surprised to find him right behind you. His hands slot around your waist and he presses his forehead to yours. It’s an affectionate gesture he doesn’t do often. Perhaps the adrenaline from the fight he just came back from is still coursing through his veins and making him more vulnerable.
Your name falls out of his lips like a prayer. You barely have time to react before he’s kissing you.
This kiss is different from the one at HQ. It’s full of fear and adrenaline. He kisses you like he isn’t sure if he’ll ever be able to do it again. Maybe you should never let him do it again.
It’s addicting. You cling to him like he’ll disappear if you don’t. Surely he will disappear if you don’t. It feels like home when the two of you touch. You’re two halves of a whole never truly feeling satisfied if you aren’t together.
Life would be so much easier if he just admitted he loved you too. If he took a chance on you both. It would save you so much heartache.
It’s a really bad idea to do this tonight, you think. You haven’t discussed anything. You haven’t come to an agreement or settled out your feelings. The two of you are merely working on instinct.
But that doesn’t stop you from leading him to your bed. His injuries don’t stop him from sleeping with you. The darkness of the night offers some cover for what you’re doing. Some way to hide from the emotions you are trying so hard to evoke and he so hard to restrain.
It’s a long night for you both. By the time you’re done, you’re exhausted and he has to go back to his world. You don’t say anything as he turns to dress. Sleep is slowly creeping up along with the smallest whisper in your head that chides you for doing this again. Falling back into his web without measuring the consequence.
Before he leaves, he kisses your forehead. It’s a soft piece of affection he’s never done before after sex. If you weren’t so tired and sleep weren’t already dragging your eyelids shut, you would have asked him to stay.
Still, before he leaves, you swear you hear him whisper an “I love you” into your skin. You can never be truly sure of it. Perhaps it was a dream your subconscious did to ease your heartbreak, but you want to believe it’s true anyway.
It isn’t until the next morning that you wake up alone again and hate yourself for putting yourself through this once more.
———————————————
Avoiding HQ isn’t doing you any favors. There’s a mountain of work with your name on it that you haven’t done in a while. Jess has been patient thus far, but you hate to add more stress to her plate.
You’re an adult. You can do professional. Even if your ex is the leader of the agency, you know you can keep calm and work.
So days after your last encounter, you ask Lyla for a portal and set off for HQ. Gwen nods at you as you pass by and you detect a hint or worry on her face. You offer her a weak smile in turn and hurry to your desk.
Paperwork is tedious. You’ve always hated to write mission reports, but it keeps your mind occupied. You breeze through five entire files before your fingers begin to cramp.
The sun in Miguel’s universe is starting to set by the time you finally give up. The workload has eased some, but you’re stuck on one particular file. The document needs some information that Miguel has in his computer. Lyla doesn’t respond when you call her, likely helping out with another mission some other team has been sent on, so you have no choice but to go to his office.
A pit of anxiety forms in your stomach. You dread walking up the stairs to where his office is. It’s been days since you last made the mistake of letting him in, and you’re not eager to see him again. Still, you can’t just shirk your duties because you’re heartbroken.
So you make yourself a promise not to sleep with him this time and go up the stairs. You tell yourself you won’t let him back in for once. That you’ll cut him off cold turkey and be out of his hair before he can even react. Maybe if you copy the document fast, you can get out before he even has a chance to speak-
But then the sound of voices reaches your ear. You can make out Miguel’s voice and someone else’s. Peter B.? It seems the two are talking in his office.
It’s wrong of you to listen in, you know it, and you almost go back down the stairs deciding to come back tomorrow-
But then Peter B. says your name and you freeze. For a moment, you panic that maybe they know you’re here. Maybe one of them has detected you with their senses or maybe Miguel has smelled you. However, it later becomes apparent they’re just talking about you.
Curiosity burns and you hesitate. It’s wrong, an invasion of their privacy, but you can’t help yourself. If they’re discussing you without your presence, you think you’re owed some rights to hear what they’re saying.
So you inch back to the door and listen in making sure to keep yourself discrete.
Peter B. sounds serious for once. It’s uncharacteristic for him. He’s talking to Miguel and you can hear something in his voice like he’s upset.
“-ow long are you going to keep doing this? You’re both miserable.”
He’s scolding Miguel. His words sound both sympathetic and exasperated. He reminds you so much of Gia that you almost roll your eyes.
“This isn’t your business,” Miguel’s voice is a growl. You recognize the dark tone he uses. It’s a tone he’s used on you before in arguments. He uses it when you pry too close and he gets frightened.
“I’m your friend,” Peter B. argues back, “I’m just looking out for you.”
There’s the scrape of a chair like he’s flung himself into a seat. You can practically imagine them both sitting across from each other. Miguel skulking and trying to ignore him while he talks while Peter B. chastises him.
Since they’ve met, Peter B. has called himself Miguel’s friend. Miguel denies it vehemently and claims not to have friends, yet he doesn’t kick him out when he intrudes. He always seems to let him talk or lets him bring Mayday to work. It’s likely that, like your situation, Miguel does think of Peter as a friend even if he would never admit it.
“We are not friends. You should go home,” Miguel bites back.
Peter makes a sound like he’s shaking his head. You hear him sigh and the chair creaks as he shifts his weight.
“Look, I get it. I do. I was divorced once, but come on, Miguel. This isn’t healthy. You keep torturing yourself with this over and over again. When will you just admit the truth to yourself?” His voice sounds tired.
Miguel is silent. You wish he weren’t. You’d love to hear what he’s thinking.
Peter continues.
“You sleep with her, you ask Lyla to check in with her, you watch her on your screens, you send her out on the least dangerous missions, and you panic when she gets hurt. Why can’t you just admit you’re in love with her and let her in. We all deserve a chance to be happy, right?”
You manage to bite back the gasp that rises up your throat.
There. Peter has said it out loud. The one thing you’ve never said out loud or Miguel.
There’s a very tense silence that follows. Miguel refuses to budge. You can practically imagine him pinching the bridge of his nose the way he does when he’s upset.
Frustration fills you. You wish he’d say something. Anything. Finally admit the truth to someone even if it isn’t to you. Or at least admit the truth to himself.
You know he loves you. Everyone around you knows too. Jess, Hobie, Gwen, Pav, Peter, Ben…Everyone knows. It’s just getting him to say it out loud and do something about it that’s the hard part.
A hand slams on something. You almost jump. It seems Miguel has taken his frustration out on a monitor. You can hear the static chirping as the screen splits in half.
“You have no idea what you’re talking about,” he hisses it out at Peter, “She’s just a colleague.”
Peter doesn’t give up. You hear his chair scrape as he stands.
“You don’t do everything you’re doing for a colleague. Look, I lost Mary Jane too once. She left me and I was miserable. I would have never have found happiness again or gotten Mayday if I hadn’t just let go of my fear. Someone once told me it’s all just a leap of faith.”
A leap of faith. You think you like that expression.
Miguel doesn’t.
“I’m not afraid and our situations aren’t comparable. Your wife was from your universe. You belonged to the same world. She didn’t have powers that made her risk her life daily. She wasn’t always in danger. You know our line of work. You know why I can’t.”
You hear him begin to pace. He’s going for his stage system. If he ascends up, he’ll brood forever and Peter’s efforts will be for naught. You hope he manages to stop him before that happens.
He does. You can hear when Peter clicks off the elevator’s button and when Miguel growls out a warning for him to quit.
“You are afraid, and that’s okay. You just can’t let fear destroy you. I was afraid to have Mayday and look at me! I love being a dad. You should let her in. Let yourself be happy. You’ve already lost enough.”
You think to Miguel’s daughter. The way he had broken when he had lost her. You think of his canon events and the people he’s watched die. It makes sense that he’s so terrified about letting you in. You get it.
However, Peter is right. Fear shouldn’t control him. You’re afraid too about loving someone in your line of work, but you’ve decided to be brave. In a world where you could die any moment, isn’t it better to die having have experienced a great love? Doesn’t the reward outweigh the pain?
Miguel mutters a string of Spanish. He’s irritated and beginning to shut down. Any moment now he’ll close himself up. You just hope Peter’s words were enough to get him to think.
Your hopes, however, are shattered when he next speaks.
“I’ll end things with her then. Happy? Set her free. She doesn’t deserve being strung along-“
“Miguel, that’s not what-“
Peter’s words are cut off as the elevator is turned back on. Your eyes burn with tears and anger floods you.
Stupid, stupid man. Too stubborn and cowardly for his own good.
“Don’t do this, Miguel, come on!” Peter practically begs him as the elevator begins to make its ascent up, “It’s not just you you’re hurting.”
“I’m going to end things once and for all. You’re right. This isn’t fair.”
Miguel’s words are final and the elevator clangs as he reaches the top. Moments later, you hear Peter drop into his chair out of frustration. That’s your key to leave.
You storm off HQ and call on Lyla. This time she answers. Whatever playful retort was on her tongue earlier dies away when she sees your tears.
You don’t give her a chance to ask what’s wrong. Instead, you demand a portal back to your world.
Emerging back into your apartment, you storm over to your cellphone. Gia was right, you think, you do need to get him out of your system. So you scroll until you find the text from Tyler all those nights ago at the bar and you send him a message inviting him over.
If Miguel wants to call things off, then you’re way ahead of him.
———————————————
Tyler is a great guy. He shows up at your apartment with some take out and doesn’t pry when he sees your poor attempt at concealing your pain. He’s entirely platonic and friendly when you invite him in.
He knows this isn’t anything more than a distraction. You two are break up buddies. There’s no romance or lust between either of you, so there’s no nervousness or tension when you sit down to eat.
Gia has left for the night pleased that you’ve finally taken her advice. You don’t have the strength in you to clarify that it isn’t like that and she doesn’t have to leave your apartment to give you privacy.
“Hope you like Chinese,” Tyler holds up some takeout boxes.
“Love it,” you reply. You try to sound upbeat and positive, but it falls flat. Tyler gives you a look of concern but doesn’t comment. He’s willing to give you space.
The two of you plop down on the couch and you let him choose a channel. He opts for a shitty B film with monsters. The acting is so poor that you find yourself snorting.
Tyler makes you laugh too. He makes it a game to spot plot holes and inconsistencies. The one who finds the most will get to pick dessert.
He’s good company. When you find yourself starting to think too long on what happened, he makes a joke to get your attention back. Perhaps if you hadn’t fallen in love with Miguel, maybe the two of you could have been something. In another universe, maybe you do end up with Tyler.
Still, in this universe, your heart is still broken.
At some point, you win and you decide on a key lime pie in the fridge. Tyler brings out some wine and you settle down into the kitchen table.
“I didn’t want to pry, but are you feeling better?” He looks at you over the rim of his glass.
“Better than this afternoon,” you admit. It’s not completely a lie.
You needed this. Being able to spend time with a friend is a good distraction. Tyler is a good guy. He doesn’t pry anymore after that question.
Instead, the two of you talk about anything and everything. You feel at ease. He makes you laugh and smile quite a few times. By the time midnight comes around, you’re surprised that you lost track of time.
He stands up and decides to call a ride-share. You tell him not too. It’s too dangerous for him to be out at night. You offer him your bed and insist when he protests. You’ll take Gia’s bed. She always takes yours when she has family over at your apartment. You know she won’t have a problem if you take hers for a night.
The two of you go to bed in your own rooms. You find your thoughts drifting towards Miguel, but you shut them down. You really don’t want to think of him now. Not when he’s decided that he’s going to end things once and for all.
At some point you drift off to sleep. You don’t wake up until the next morning when someone knocks on your door.
Your room door is still shut, Tyler is sleeping in. You don’t even think before opening the door convinced that it’s Gia coming back. However, the person standing in the hallway makes you freeze.
It’s Miguel, not Gia, who stands there. He’s wearing civilian clothing and looks miserable. There’s exhaustion on every plane if his face like he hasn’t slept a wink thinking. You hesitate.
“Miguel?”
He hangs back taking you in. You must look like a mess in your pajamas. If you weren’t still half asleep, maybe you’d be embarrassed.
“Can I come in?” He calls your name softly and adds a ‘please’ when you don’t move an inch for the longest time.
You glance at your room door hoping Tyler is still asleep when you let him in.
The last time Miguel was here, you two slept together. It feels maddening to have him so close again.
“What do you need? Lyla didn’t call me.”
You try to keep your voice even, steady. It’s an attempt to hide the turmoil inside you. Miguel hesitates when he sees the two wine glasses on the table. You had left them out yesterday. Still, he opts not to ask about it.
“I wanted to talk to you,” Miguel admits, “I haven’t been fair.”
You remember his conversation with Peter. Is he here to end things once and for all? You wrap you arms around yourself to keep you steady.
“I’m sorry,” Miguel murmurs, “For everything. You didn’t deserve it. I took advantage.”
“You didn’t do anything I didn’t want to do,” you shake your head, “It’s not taking advantage if you were honest from the beginning. I just got my hopes up.”
The words feel bitter in your tongue. You look down at the floor.
“But I wasn’t honest,” Miguel admits. It’s a quiet whisper that makes you look up. He looks like he’s struggling. He’s never been good at vocalizing his feelings or talking things out. This is a major effort for him, “I lied. I wasn’t being honest.”
He takes a step towards you and you stare blankly at him. You don’t want to get your hopes up.
He calls your name again. A plea.
“I wasn’t honest when I told you I didn’t want anything between us. I was being a coward. Peter B. poked his nose where he didn’t belong and talked some sense into me. Jess chewed me out too last night. They both made me realize how terrible I’ve been.”
So Jess had talked to him too. It was probably after you had left. Having been on the receiving end of her scolding before, you can imagine it was a harsh awakening for him. It must have been if he’s deviated from his initial plan with Peter.
You wait patiently as he gathers his thoughts. This is a huge effort for him, and you know it doesn’t come easy. Some hope rises in your chest.
“The truth is, I’ve been lying to the both of us for a long time. I-it isn’t just sex, alright? It was never just sex.”
He takes a step closer. You watch him closely. His eyes are open to you now. You can see the emotions there. The affection, the heartbreak, the yearning, the fear, the love. It makes your breath hitch.
“Miguel-“
He cuts you off gently. His hand goes for your cheek. He hesitates just briefly, his fear wanting him to bolt, but he fights it back. When his skin touches yours, a little spark has you both feeling dizzy.
“The truth is, I do want more. I’ve wanted more since you walked into HQ to begin with. I kept pushing you away because I was scared. I know you probably don’t want anything to do with me, I wouldn’t blame you if you told me to leave, but I want you to know the truth. I don’t want you to think it was something you did or that you were never good enough.”
Silence reigns between you both. Emotion chokes your words. He leans in briefly.
“I want this,” he breathes out, “You terrify me, this scares me, and I hate feeling this sense of panic, but I can’t stand it anymore. I don’t like seeing you cry or pushing you away.”
“I-“
The words die in your throat. You think about how you want to tell him that you love him, that you want this with him too, and that you’ve been waiting for this moment. This dream of yours has finally come true and you feel like you can finally breathe again. You want to pour everything you feel into your words so that he can understand everything you’ve gone through. You just don’t know how.
To his credit, he waits patiently. His eyes are warm when he looks at you. It’s the type of look he’s only given you before when he thought you weren’t paying attention. Your heart races in your chest.
Just when you think you’ve found the right words to respond-
The door opens behind you. A half asleep Tyler stumbles out still unaware of his surroundings.
The world stops.
You see the moment Miguel turns his head and spots him. He realizes he’s coming out of your room. Slowly, you see everything start to fall apart.
You want to beg him to listen, explain to him that it isn’t like this, and tell him that nothing happened. Yet he’s already moving away from you. His eyes cycle between betrayal, jealousy, heartbreak, and fury before he closes himself off. He takes a step back and an entire chasm opens up between the two of you. Whatever progres you two had just made is now gone.
Tyler blanches when he spots Miguel. You see the wheels churn in his head and he realizes what happened. What he’s just done unintentionally. The last of the sleep disappears from his system and is replaced by shock.
“Oh god, sorry,” Tyler blanks.
For a moment, you think you see Miguel tense. He’s like a coil waiting to spring. You suspect he’s getting ready to launch himself at Tyler. You take a step between them to try and stop him and try to explain-
It’s too late. Miguel reins in his self control and doesn’t strike. Instead, he straightens himself out and turns away.
“I didn’t realize you had company,” his voice is a deadpan growl much more terrifying than anything you’ve ever heard before. You move before you can think. Your hand snags his sleeve to try and explain what just happened-
He firmly tugs himself free of your grasp. His voice is cold, detached, and guarded when he answers back.
“Don’t worry, I’ll let you two get back to it. This was a mistake I won’t make again.”
He storms out of your apartment with his entire body practically seething with anger. You try and follow only to see him disappear in the middle of the hallway. Lyla closes the portal before you can follow.
Tyler is incredibly apologetic when he leaves. He feels terrible he’s ruined things for you. You half heartedly tell him it’s not his fault. It’s all yours, really.
By the time he’s gone, you feel like someone has taken your heart and crushed it in the palm of their hand. You crawl back into Gia’s bed and sob until your head begins to pound. Everything feels ruined.
———————————————
Gia finds you there sometime in the morning. She smiles and opens her mouth to tease you about your date when she catches sight of your face. Immediately she pales and rushes forward.
“What’s wrong? Did Tyler hurt you?” Her hands come around you and she holds you tightly.
You shake your head.
“Then what happened? You look like you’ve seen a ghost,” she fusses over your tears. Her eyes are wide with surprise. You reckon you’re giving her a terrible fright.
In between sobs, the story pours out of you.
You tell her everything. How Miguel had come to tell you that he wanted a romantic relationship between you, how you had been about to tell him that you loved him too, and how Tyler had given him the wrong idea.
You’re practically shaking by the time you’re done. Gia presses her lips together and holds you closer.
Your heart has never broken quite like this before. It’s in millions of tiny pieces. You don’t think you’ll ever be able to pick them back up. Not with what happened.
Gia holds you until you’re done crying. She’s pensive as she stares out the window. Finally, she sighs.
“Call him.”
It’s such a deviation from her old advice that you blink at her. It pains her to say it out loud. She looks like she bit into a lemon when she does, but she powers through.
“Look, this guy got the wrong idea, right? Go see him and explain things. Don’t let him get away. It sounds like he genuinely cares for you.”
You wipe away at a tear on your cheek and glance at her.
“You hate him,” you mumble. Gia helps you clean up your face. Her hands are gentle.
“I hated him because I thought he was just a booty call leading you on. It sounds like he does love you back. You shouldn’t let him go after a misunderstanding, right? At least explain what happened to him and go from there,” she bites her cheek, “If you’ve been fighting for him all this time, what’s one more battle? Give it one last try.”
Her advice seems so simple. You sniff until some of your tears finally dry. Your head is pounding but it’s nothing compared to the agony that is in your chest.
Gia helps you dress and gives you breakfast. She wishes you well. When this is all over, whether it ends in tragedy or success, you’ll have to thank her. She’s put up with so much on your behalf.
You tell her you’re going to his apartment. Trepidation fills you as you round a corner. You call up Lyla on your watch.
When she greets you, her face is downtrodden. You miss her cheery and teasing personality.
“It’s not a good idea for you to head over there right now,” Lyla hesitates, “He’s in a mood. He’s been smashing things and throwing stuff in his office all morning.”
You wince wracked with guilt. You hurt him. Sure he probably deserved it after how badly he’s hurt you, but you still never meant to do that to him.
“Lyla, please let me in,” you beg.
Lyla looks away.
“He told me he didn’t want you anywhere near HQ for a few weeks. You’ve been put on leave.”
Panic grips you. You need to speak with him. You hold the watch up and beg.
“Lyla, please. Please let me make things right. He’s got the wrong idea.”
It takes some more begging. Lyla looks torn. She doesn’t want to anger Miguel further after this morning, but she also doesn’t want him to hurt himself on a misunderstanding. Finally, she wilts and opens a portal. You jump in before you have a chance to second guess yourself.
———————————————
Lyla had understated the sight of Miguel’s office. It’s a complete war zone. His monitors are smashed on the ground, his desk is half way across the room, and there’s broken glass everywhere. He’s destroyed everything in his wake. You wince as you step over broken wood and metal.
Jess has opened the door for you. She tells you to leave immediately if things get messy. Miguel really doesn’t want to see you right now. Lyla will be on standby ready to send you home or anywhere else if you ask her to.
You wave them both away as you search for Miguel. His elevator is on the ground which means he has to be somewhere on this floor.
After a while, you find him. He’s staring out the window and his entire back is rigid. He senses you before you have a chance to speak.
“Get out.”
It’s a harsh bark of an order that makes you wince. You stay rooted to the spot.
“Miguel-“
“Lyla, get her out.”
He taps on his watch and Lyla appears. She looks between the two of you before shaking her head.
“No can do. Jess has me working a different mission. Sorry, Miggy. Guess you’ll have to talk things out like adults.”
She winks out before Miguel can press her again. You hear the sound of anger he makes as she disappears. He still doesn’t turn around to look at you.
“I came to speak to you,” you hear yourself say. You’re surprised your voice sounds so calm. You certainly don’t feel okay. Your ears are roaring and your heart is going a million miles a minute.
“I don’t want to hear it. See yourself out.”
This time he does turn. His face is completely devoid of expression and he moves away from you.
You spin around to follow.
“What you saw isn’t what it looks like. Tyler and I are just friends.”
Miguel huffs something that sounds like a laugh. It sends shivers down your spine. He says Tyler’s name under his breath like a curse.
“It doesn’t matter,” he waves you away, “You and I are just coworkers. Nothing more.”
His words ache but you don’t let them land. You know the truth. He’s told you it just a few hours ago.
“Miguel, stop,” you come up behind him. He’s completely tense when you grab his hand to stop him.
“Enough,” he says your name with a warning, “Go home. There’s nothing more to say.”
You don’t budge. There’s a terrible voice inside your head that tells you that letting him go now would be a mistake. That if you don’t clarify things, you’ll lose him forever.
You try again.
“Nothing happened between us. I only care about you. Please look at me,” you plea. You try to sidestep him to put yourself in his direct field of vision.
He turns around.
“It wouldn’t matter if it had, you owe me no loyalty. We were never together,” he argues back. It sounds like he’s trying to convince himself of that. Perhaps he’s been turning those words over in his head all morning.
You won’t let him leave. He needs to know the truth. If he decides afterwords that he still doesn’t want you, fine. You’ll give up and resign from the agency. You’ll go back to your old life and force yourself to let him go, but he needs to know the truth at the very least.
“Nothing happened at all. We slept in separate beds. There is no one else but you,” you move forward, “I was going to tell you then that I do want you. That I’ve always wanted you.”
He still won’t look at you. You manage to stand in front of him and force him to see you. You want him to look and see the sincerity in your gaze. The love you hold for him burns bright when you meet his eyes.
Some of the tension from his body leaves. He sees that you mean every word. That if Tyler hadn’t interrupted, you would have told him you loved him then and there.
But he’s still afraid. He’s warring with himself over what to do. His instincts tell him to push you aside like he’s been doing. To save himself further pain by cutting you off once and for all. Another part of him is crying out for him not to. The part of himself he had bared for you this morning wants him to give in. To hear you out and be honest with himself.
You hope that other part of himself wins. You need that part of himself to win.
“Please believe me,” you whisper, “It’s only ever been you.”
His eyes close as your hands trace his face. You have to stand up on your tippy toes to reach him.
After a long pause, he sighs.
“Do you know how much it killed me to see him? To imagine him touching you? I almost killed him. The worst part was that I knew it was all my fault. That you owed me nothing and it wouldn’t have mattered if you had decided to move on because I pushed you away.”
“Do you know how much it killed me to be pushed away?” You murmur. It’s not a rebuke or retort. There’s no poison or malice behind your words, you just want him to understand that you’ve both been hurting.
He winces anyway. His eyes trace every inch of your face as if looking for something. You aren’t sure what he’s searching for, but you do know there’s more you haven’t said.
“I want to be with you. I’ve been fighting for you since the beginning. If you don’t want me, then tell me. Tell me once and for all, so that I can move on because I’ve been suffocating these past few days,” you slowly withdraw from him to give him space, “I love you, Miguel. But I can’t keep doing this. You’re breaking me.”
Silence descends in the room. Your heart beats wildly in your chest.
There. The ball is in his court now. He can either accept or reject you. Either way, this game between you will be over.
He’s quiet for so long that you suspect he’s made his choice. You try not to show how heartbroken you are when you take a step back. You’re about to apologize for wasting his time when he surges forward.
You don’t have time to react before he’s picking you up. His mouth crashes against yours and his kiss steals your breath away. He pours everything in it. His heartbreak, his longing, his love of you. It’s so powerful that you feel your self start to melt. You respond in kind kissing him back just as fiercely.
He holds you to him as if afraid that you’ll disappear if he lets you go. You two meet again and again. In between breaths, he pants your name. It isn’t until both of your mouths are bruised that you manage to come up for air.
He leans into you almost immediately after, kissing your throat and murmuring against your skin.
“I want you. I’ve wanted you since the beginning. I’m sorry,” he kisses your mouth gently in another apology, “I don’t deserve this.”
You cut him off before his thoughts can spiral again.
“I love you,” you repeat. His eyes close like he can barely believe it so you say it again. When he opens his eyes, you see the love for you in them. You’ve always known he loved you. Now, you finally have a confirmation.
“I love you too,” he responds. It takes your breath away. You’ve been waiting for a really long time to hear those words.
The next time you kiss, it’s less frenzied. This time, you both know you have time to pace things out. You’ll have all the time you need from now on. You’re both done pushing each other away and breaking your hearts.
His heart is racing against you and you feel your own beat against your ribcage. Still, you press forward. Declarations of love spill forth between heated kisses and nips. You’re drowning in each other.
For the first time in ages, things slowly start to fall into place. The darkness looming over you is gone replaced by a beautiful sunlight. You feel yourself smile into the kiss and he kisses you more softly as a result.
The two of you will have to talk at length more in the future. You’ll have to discuss what you being in an official relationship will mean in terms of your jobs and your different universes, but that’s all a problem for tomorrow. For now, you’re both content to be with each other and to celebrate the fact that you are now together.
The road ahead will not be easy. Nothing in life ever is. Yet you know you can both weather it if you fight for each other the way you’ve been fighting each other. There’s nothing the two of you can’t survive if you work hard.
Together.
1K notes · View notes
sunshine-and-moonshine · 11 months
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Cod - SpiderMan Kiss
Requested: No
Warnings: None
It just seemed so funny and cute when you saw it on the tv. You couldn’t help but want to try it. Which all lead to you climbing up onto the large doorway into the living room, trying to find the perfect angle to lean over without falling and busting your head open on the hardwood floor. And lucky for you, this was the exact moment your lover decided to come home, heading right for your location.
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Ghost
Ghost nearly punches you out of instinct when your head pops out from the top of the doorway. As it is, his fist is clenched and raised, and he pulls it close to his chest when he realizes it’s just you.
“Bloody Hell, Love.” He mumbles, ignoring your giggling. “The hell are you doing up there?” He asks, eyeing your precarious position as you don’t even bother to explain, simply cupping the back of his head and pulling him in, nudging his balaclava up just past his lips before kissing him. He hums, pleased at the affection as he deepens the kiss, cupping your cheeks in his large palms. It only clicks with him when you pull back, making him chuckle. “I think I’m supposed to be the one hanging, Love. Since I’m the one with the mask and all.”
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Soap
Soap practically jumps out of his skin when your head pops out from the top of the doorway, slipping and falling back on his ass, cursing a bit when he realizes that it’s just you.
“What are you doing up there, Love? You could get hurt!” He says, brows furrowed as he stands back up to his full height, examining you quizzically as you motion him closer. He does so slowly, pleasantly surprised when your mouth presses against him, but he eagerly kisses back, tongue playfully prodding at your lips. “If this is the reward for getting scared by you then by all means, do it again.” He chuckles, breathless as you pull back.
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König
König was so distracted when he came in that he didn’t even notice your head at the top of the doorway at first. It wasn’t til your heads butted together (gently, thank god) that he finally looked up.
He blinked at you. You blinked at him. He was….so confused, but didn’t have time to ask questions before you were pulling up his mask and planting a sweet kiss on his lips. He was still standing there when you climbed down, so confused that there might as well be question marks floating around him like some sort of cartoon.
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Alejandro
Alejandro also wasn’t paying that much attention when he walked into the house, too busy on his phone, texting Rudy something or other. That was when he noticed you out of the corner of his eye, looking like some sort of deranged ghost or something. He immediately jolts and curses, backpedaling as he clutches his chest, like that would calm his racing heart.
“SANTA MIERDA!” He shouts, taking a few deep breaths while giving you an annoyed look. Even your chuckling is not enough to soothe his irritation as he walks closer, ready to scold you for scaring him like that, only to be cut off by your warm lips melding against his, stealing his breath away. He blinks at you, suddenly soothed, though he does demand a few more kisses before you can come back down.
2K notes · View notes
jungwondazed · 5 months
Text
18+ only / emotion heavy sex w heeseung
i think there’s a loneliness hidden deep inside heeseung that is sort of masked with his flirty and bold interactions with fans. he’s charismatic, no question but i like to think there’s some of us who can kind of see through that.
i believe he longs for a love so deep it could heal the innermost parts of him, the parts of his childhood that he couldn’t live out regularly due to the stress of trying to debut. growing up in the spotlight under strict scrutiny and never having the chance to be like any other young adult, leads me to believe that heeseung craves a genuine relationship.
he’s gentle with you, patient. he plays his role of a man well. protective, caring, and nurturing you in the times that you need. when you come to him about personal problems he nods with every sentence you express, he tilts his head at your hurt, and wraps his hand around your fingers, reminding you of his presence. heeseung is anything but abrasive and abrupt, he is the wind blowing through a field that follows you every way.
he loves so hard that it hurts. there is no getting mad at him, he’s never wronged you of any sort. he’s sensitive, more than most guys are. as tough and head strong as he is, when he welcomes someone like you into his life that turns him into a vulnerable man there are softs spots that you must tip toe around because loving him is learning the parts of him that needs healing.
with his emotions set in place, it translates over to how he takes physical affection, and he is a fool for it. heeseung would never casually sleep with anyone, his values and life experiences has shaped him into a guy that can only get off if it’s with someone he desperately loves.
“is this okay?” he asks every single time like this isn’t anything you aren’t used to. you nod, and he continues, his breath staggering when you grind down and he pushes up.
heeseung doesn’t think he’ll ever get used to this overwhelming feeling of love and warmth through genuine and meaningful sex. the way your skin presses on him, the outline of your body in the dark when you ride him, how pretty your face is so up close he could kiss every inch of it. there were days when he was so alone that even if a thousand people showed up at his door the isolation swallowed him whole. with your one body on his, he thanks all his lucky stars that he was patient enough to await for someone like you. the nerves on the pads of his fingers are stimulated by your breasts, how he loves feeling them knowing you gave all yourself to him. his grip on your waist as you fuck yourself is tight, not wanting to ever let you go.
heeseung stares at you like the world gives him a few seconds of more time, his gaze lingering down your face and body like there is no tomorrow. he soaks in the image as if there aren’t plenty of more chances to make love, yet he treats you with speciality each time.
“ah”s and “oh”s fall from his lips, some stuck in his throat when you stroke him with your walls. he feels your love in every way like this, never closing his eyes despite how good it truly feels.
“i love you, ____” he’s the first to say those three words each time, and you kiss them right from his mouth, giving it to him like he needs it.
he fucks like both of your lives depend on this one moment, thrusting up into you when you’re too tired to keep going, showing you how love is supposed to be. that we bear the weight when the other can’t, that there is a pleasure is doing the labor for our partner.
“feels too good hee,” your grip on his shoulder almost hurts but that thought vanishes in seconds when he hits it right where you love it. he keeps his pace at that same spot, listening as you tell him over and over again how good he makes you feel, how you love him so much, drinking your words up.
he presses you tight against his chest when you’re both close, trembling as each passing stroke inches you towards your high. there are moments in life heeseung looks back on that makes him think every hardship he has encountered was worth it. some of them being his first call back, first congratulations from his family, and a performance here and there. but the majority of those moments are all linked to you. memories of how you look when you cum on him flashes through his mind, because there is no closer bond in love than through feeling a moment so intense together: with you struggling to take it, spitting out i love you’s and every word of affirmation there is, he’s delighted that all the sacrifices and tears that he gave, rewarded himself with you. he cums in you deep, almost whining by the time it spills into you. he loves you so much, the feeling of his orgasm and his never ending affection for you is euphoric, you experience it in every part of you. he is raw and tender, making you feel like it was the first time after each one ended.
“i love you so much, ___, i love you, just so you kn-“ and you’re all over him again, not once letting him slip out of you.
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usedtobecooler · 6 months
Text
steve takes on a shitty little side job for halloween, working as a scare actor at the pumpkin patches after dark strictly adult shows.
his character changes most nights, to keep things fresh but mostly so that eddie won’t come running in with his girl of the night — with the sole purpose of dragging steve to the ground to make himself look tough in front of her.
tonight he’s got a burlap sack over his face, dressed in a blue boiler suit that’s ripped at the chest from an overzealous customer a few days previous — and okay, maybe he should’ve worn a shirt under it, but, y’know, the chicks dig it.
he’s hiding behind a hay bale when he spots you with your group of friends — you’re an easy target, jumping at every little noise, flash of light and brush of fingers on your elbows. your friends are laughing so hard it draws attention, every actor in the place jumping out on you all and terrifying you further.
he almost feels bad about praying on you, knowing he’s gonna freak you out, but it was what you paid for, after all. and he was endeared by the fact that, no matter how nervous you seemed, you were laughing just as hard as your friends were and looked to be genuinely enjoying it.
as you get closer, excitement builds in steve’s chest, you’re slightly sideways, unaware of his presence, and he takes his opportunity — pushes his way out from behind the bales to a gaggle of ear piercing screams and laughter. you jump, trip over your own feet and basically fall onto him, a panicked little giggle pushing past your lips.
he crowds you back up against the hay bale stack, honey flecked eyes narrowed and hardened as you stare at him, a nervous laugh escaping you. you’re breathing heavily, he can feel your chest heaving against his own with how tightly pressed together you are. he forgets for a moment that he’s meant to be scaring you, instead leaning a toned arm out to bracket you in.
he only plans to do it for a moment, but then you actively push up into him, like you’re daring him to do more and, oh. steve leans in, so close in fact, that your noses brush through the thick, scratchy material of the sack covering his face.
you gasp, another nervous laugh being punched out of you, though your gaze finally leave his to rake down the vast expanse of exposed, tan, freckled skin. steve almost feels a little smug at how long it takes for you to rip your pretty eyes off of his toned body.
your friends have long gone, their laughter and screams to be heard just over steve’s shoulder. he’s almost glad that they left you both alone to have your moment, but his shackles go up at the idea of them leaving you.
he’s almost ready to break character to escort you back to them, when a high pitched trill of your name is echoed through the maze. you almost look sad as you acknowledge your friend, pouting exaggeratedly and nodding towards them.
he holds his hand up to his ear, fingers in the shape of a makeshift phone, “gimme your number?” he’s grinning, even though you can’t see, and he knows his voice sounds deeper than usual with the muffled affect of the burlap mask.
you fluster, covering your mouth with your hand to hide your laugh, “when do you finish up?” your voice is soft, sweet and steve kind of melts with it.
steve doesn’t speak again, just holds up all ten fingers to mimic that he gets off at 10pm. you look down at your watch on your wrist, just a slight glance but it’s enough for him to catch.
“meet me under the ferris wheel once you’re off?”
and hell, who was steve to pass on that opportunity?
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songforeddiemunson · 8 months
Note
Can you please do a Eddie X virgin reader where there has always been romance and they never acted on it until they confess when there watching a film and then a couple weeks after they make out then have soft sex
Thank you so much for the request!! I made some minor adjustments because that's just the route the narrative took me, but I hope you like it! I'm SO sorry this took so long, it's been a nutty few weeks.
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NEXT SUMMER
Eddie Munson x Fem!Virgin!Reader (description vague apart from AFAB for inclusivity)
Summary: Eddie meets a cousin of the Wheelers who is visiting for the summer, and falls head over heels. The problem is, she lives in Chicago, and needs to return in the fall. Can they handle it?
Warnings/Tropes: longing with a bit of angst, fluffy affection, romantic soft smut, mild language, aftercare, mostly this is just really sweet.
Word Count: 5517
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August 1990
You first caught Eddie’s eye on a late summer evening, standing under the twinkling lights of carnival rides at the county fair. It was the sort of cotton candy sky just moments before the sun dipped below the horizon, signaling the end of another august day. The droning cicadas were rapidly giving way to the cricket’s song, but all of those innocuous details faded away as Eddie watched you as you waited in line for the Scrambler, talking and laughing with your companion.
Eddie’s heart nearly leapt in his throat when he saw that the person you were speaking with was someone he actually knew. Nancy Wheeler! his brain screamed, and before he realized what he was doing, his feet were carrying him forward as if he was on autopilot, such was your magnetism.
Nancy caught sight of Eddie as he approached, and her face broke out into a broad grin. “Eddie!” she exclaimed with delight. “It’s so great to see you!” She hugged him as you stood by, a polite smile gracing your lips.
“Likewise, Wheeler,” Eddie replied fondly, and when his eyes slipped to you, your heart nearly ceased its rhythm. The breath was stolen from your lungs, and all you could do was stare wordlessly at the handsome man who evidently was a friend to Nancy.
Unbeknownst to you, Eddie was experiencing the same physical paralysis under your gaze.
“Eddie! You have to meet my little cousin!  She goes by Ivy, but her name is–”
“Oh my god,” you moaned, cutting Nancy off. Blood rushed to your cheeks in mortification.  “I am not little, I’m twenty years old now!’
Nancy giggled fondly. “Well sure, but you’ll always be little to me.”
You rolled your eyes. “I’m only two years younger than you, but whatever.”
Eddie laughed, and your cheeks pinkened even more. “It’s nice to meet you, Eddie,” you said. You struggled to meet his eyes; it was like staring at the sun.
“It’s good to meet you too Ivy, if– if you don’t mind me calling you that.”
You smiled and nodded enthusiastically. “Please do.”
And so you spent the rest of the evening with Eddie and Nancy, keeping things oh so casual but feeling like you might die every time he looked at you. You remained aloof because, after all, you didn’t even live in Hawkins, and eventually you’d have to return home to the city. 
When Eddie first learned that you would be returning to Chicago at the end of the summer, he was crestfallen but struggled to mask it.
“I’m sure Chicago is really cool,” he said with forced bravado. “Way cooler than boring old Hawkins.”
“Oh but I love coming here,” you breathed enthusiastically. “Chicago is cool and all, but this is so nice. I love smelling the mown grass, and being able to go to the drive-in movie theater, and all that great summertime stuff.” You gestured around you. “And the county fair! I love coming to the fair.”
Eddie smiled despite his growing sadness. “You make it sound pretty nice. But really it’s just cornfields…”
“...I love corn,” you countered.
“And strip malls…”
“.....strip malls always have video stores, and I love movies.” you said with a grin.
Nancy returned from buying a candy apple.
You pointed at her. “Candy apples! I can’t buy candy apples in Chicago.”
“Hmm?” she replied, confused, chewing. “I’m sure you can buy candle apples in Chicag–”
“Not from the fair though,” you interrupted. “They’re better from the fair.”
“Point taken,” Eddie said with a chuckle, holding up his hands in mock surrender.
“I do still want to jump in a creek though,” you said wistfully.
“Gross, no. There are leeches,” Nancy said.
“Not in creeks,” Eddie laughed. “Ponds, maybe. But creeks are fine.”
And so the evening wound down. You and Eddie went back and forth over the virtues of city vs country living, but Eddie had to admit, you did have a way of making Hawkins sound pretty great. When it was time to part ways, Eddie desperately wanted to kiss you, so much that his lips nearly burned from the need, but he refrained. What would a girl like you ever see in a guy like him?
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Two days later, on a late Sunday morning, where the summer sun shone relentlessly through a bluebird sky, Eddie picked up the phone and dialed the Wheeler’s number with a shaking hand.
Mike answered, sounding like he just woke up.
“Mehllo?” he mumbled by way of answer.
“Mike! It’s Eddie.”
“Munson?!” that seemed to wake him up. “Dude! It’s been forever!”
“Yeah man! How are you doing?”
“Oh things are good, I’m going off to college next month, and–”
“Is your cousin around? Ivy?” Eddie blurted anxiously, covering his face in embarrassment over the way he must have sounded. “Sorry man, it’s just that I need to ask her something. I would love to catch up with you though! Before you head to school; we should get together.”
“Yeah definitely,” Mike responded, unbothered. "We’ll catch up. I’ll go get Ivy….” 
Eddie heard the handset thump against whatever surface Mike set it upon, and heard him call your name. He faintly heard your voice respond, which made Eddie’s already hammering heart pick up its pace. More fumbling noises ended with a slightly breathless, “Hello? Eddie?”
“Hi Ivy,” he replied, and you thought maybe you could hear a smile in his voice. “Wanna go jump in a creek?”
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Your summertime in Hawkins was coming to a close; in only a few days’ time you were due to return to Chicago and university. As the final days ticked away, a ball of sadness gradually grew in the pit of your stomach. It was the best summer ever, and you were sorry to see its end.
Since the night you met him at the fair, Eddie had taken you cliff jumping into the Bear Creek, something that simultaneously terrified and thrilled you, leaving you more exhilarated than you have felt in a long while. But when you weren’t jumping, you simply floated in the water, watching the dappled sun dance across its surface, loving life.
Eddie also took you to the drive-in theater. It wasn’t a date, since he didn’t technically ask you out like that, and Nancy and Mike also insisted on tagging along. You lined camping chairs up in front of the van and rolled down the windows with the sound up loud so you could all sit together. It was a lovely, balmy night of watching Total Recall, and you ate too many skittles while swatting mosquitoes. It was perfect.
And now summer was ending and it was time to go, and you couldn’t possibly want to return to Chicago less. Why did you have to meet Eddie now?
You sighed as you packed up your things, folding clothes and setting them in your suitcase slowly, unmotivated. Nancy perched on the side of your bed, watching.
“You seem really bummed out,” Nancy remarked.
“I guess I’m not looking forward to going home. I wish I could stay a bit longer.” you replied, not bothering to hide your low mood.
“Would this have anything to do with a certain long-haired boy that lives on the other side of town?” Nancy prodded. It’s not like you were hiding anything.
“That obvious? And he’s twenty-four, he’s not a boy.”
Nancy nodded, with a giggle. “Fair enough.”
“And…maybe. I don’t know. It’s not like he’s kissed me or asked me out properly....” You stalled your packing, and you folded and unfolded the same sweater over and over while you let your thoughts wander.
“But you want him to?” Nancy prodded gently after a moment.
You sighed. “Yeah, I do. It’s kind of all I can think about actually,” you added with a wistful chuckle.  “But what’s the point when I live all the way in Chicago the other nine months of the year?” You flopped down dramatically on the bed with a huff.
“Maybe you can talk on the phone and stuff throughout the year, and pick up where you left off next summer?”
“Long distance?” You allowed a glimmer of hope to creep in. “Do you think that could work?”
Nancy shrugged. “I did it with Jonathan when he moved to California. It’s not easy, but it can work.”
You hitched a deep sigh. “What if he doesn’t want to?”
“There’s only one way to find out,” Nancy replied.
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The sky was overcast as you loaded the last of your bags into the back of the Wheeler’s car, matching your mood. You hugged Mike and Karen goodbye; Ted and Nancy were going to ride with you to the train station. You scanned the empty suburban streets for Eddie, but he was nowhere to be seen, causing your heart to sink even lower.
Just as you were about to climb into the backseat, you heard a sound that pulled your attention toward the woods at the edge of the neighborhood. There was some rustling and you saw that the flora was jostling about. What the–
Eddie suddenly materialized from the trees, calling, “Wait!” as he trotted over toward you. Your heart reversed its previous downward trajectory with haste, and happiness soared through you so abruptly and completely that you thought you might fall over.
“I cut through the woods,” Eddie stated breathlessly. “I was afraid I wouldn’t make it.”
“Just in time,” you grinned.
Ted poked his head out of the car’s driver window. “We’re going to be late if we don’t get going.”
“Oh– Okay, I won’t take long,” Eddie stammered slightly.  “I just wanted to say good bye and ask you…is it okay if I call you?”
You struggled to contain your delight at the suggestion. “Yes Eddie, I would really love that.” You pulled a small notepad from your purse, jotted your number down, and tore the scrap of paper out before handing it over. “Don’t lose this.”
Eddie had the fleeting thought that he would have your digits tattooed on his flesh to ensure their permanence. “Don’t worry, I won’t.”
Ted honked the horn, even though you were all standing right there.
“Okay, well I have to go. Call me tomorrow?”
Eddie nodded, his throat suddenly gone dry. “I will.”
As you sat down and closed the car door behind you, Ted wasted no time pulling away.  You twisted around in the seat to watch Eddie grow smaller as the distance increased. He raised a hand and waved shortly before you went around a bend, causing you to lose sight of him.
The temporary high of seeing Eddie was quickly supplanted by sadness. It was going to be a very long wait for next summer.
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June 1991
Once you were clear of the train platform, your rolling suitcase and duffle bag appropriately situated, you bolted through the crowd as quickly as possible.
Nine long months you waited. Nine months of speaking on the phone for hours nearly every night, talking about everything, watching movies together, helping Eddie write his next D&D campaign, discussing books. You shared hopes, dreams, wishes, and desires. Nine months of longing. Nine months of imagining his lips on yours, his fingers gripping the meat of your thighs, picturing him doing things to you that you’d never done with anyone before. You were tired of waiting.
You never officially declared yourselves to each other, still hadn’t even kissed, so you couldn’t be completely sure that he felt the same way. But you had a pretty good idea; after all, would a guy spend that much time on the phone with you if he didn’t feel some kind of way? He said he was going to pick you up at the train station after all, so that had to count for something.
You were determined. Eddie would not slip through your fingers; this summer was going to change everything.
And there he was. As you entered the terminal with the other passengers, you spotted him immediately.  He was leaning up against the wall, torn tight jeans and black band tee, long chestnut curls cascading around his shoulders. He was beautiful. 
The way his face lit up when he spotted you could probably heal the world, if you could find a way to harness it. 
You let your bags drop to the ground as you ran to him, and he opened his arms to you as you collided with him, slamming him back against the wall. His arms slid up around your back and gripped you tightly, his breath fanned across one ear, setting all your senses alight, and you simply resided in his embrace and felt the object of your affection absolutely envelop you. Oh how you had waited for this.
You pulled away just enough to look at his face. He was undeniably very happy, eyes bright, smiling broadly, his dimple making itself known.
“Hey you,” he said.
“Hi you,” you replied.
“I’ve missed you,” he said softly.
“I've been counting the minutes,” you said. You thought maybe you were going to cry.
“Try seconds,” he whispered, opening his eyes wide as if he was revealing a scandalous secret. 
The rest of the bustling train station faded away. The voices and echoes were reduced to a muffled din, and all the people who hastened past you became less corporeal. As your eyes roamed his face, it felt like you were the only two people in the world.
He blinked and pulled away, and as soon as it started, the spell was broken.
He hastened over to your bags and grabbed hold of them, slinging your duffel over his shoulder and taking your rollbag in one hand. “Let’s go,” he said with a look over his shoulder, his hair bouncing as he hurried through the terminal with you in tow.  He slowed as he approached the doors to outside. “Uh, I’ll take you to the Wheeler’s to settle in, but I wondered…” He paused, his expression belying his own lack of confidence. He looked almost shy.  “I got an apartment about a month back, finally…a space of my own,” he continued. “I wondered if maybe you wanted to watch a movie later?”
“Eddie!” you breathed, excited. “That’s so great! Why didn’t you tell me?”
“I wanted it to be a surprise,” he said with a small shrug. “No pressure, if you don’t want to. I just wanted to put it out there, no strings attached.”
“I would love to,” you beamed. 
“Do you want to know what movie I picked out?” Eddie asked.
“I really don’t care,” you replied, and you laughed together as you walked to the parking lot.
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You waited anxiously for Eddie’s arrival later that evening.
“It’s a daaaate!” Mike sang as if he was still fourteen and not a freshman in college. Nancy slapped him on the arm.
“Don’t tease,” she admonished, but there was a twinkle in her eye.
“It is not a date!” you countered as you checked your reflection for the thousandth time. “Doesn’t someone have to say it’s a date for it to actually be a date?”
Mike rolled his eyes. “Some things are just sort of….assumed.”
You and Nancy glared at him in tandem. “Uh, no thank you. Nobody should make assumptions about anything like that,” Nancy scolded.
You nodded in agreement. “Yeah I mean, what if he just thinks I’m a great friend, and I go and spoil everything going in there thinking this is a date?”
Mike gestured toward you as you touched up your lip gloss. “Says the chick who has been fussing over her appearance obsessively for the last 45 minutes.”
“I’m just being prepared,” you said.
“For what?” Nancy said with a chuckle.
“Just in case it is a date. I never said I didn’t want it to be.”
Nancy laughed as Mike groaned in exasperation. Fortunately, you were saved from further discussion by the doorbell. You ran from the room before anyone could stop you, grabbing your shoulder bag on the way. 
You opened the door and revealed a slightly nervous looking Eddie, and he nearly stole your breath away.
Eddie was resplendent in a blue and black plaid button-up shirt with his black jeans and black converse sneakers. He had clearly made an effort to tame his hair, and his waves were soft and tidy. His breath caught when he saw you.
“H– hi,” he said with a grin.
“Hi yourself,” you said. You chanced a look over your shoulder, fearful of an audience. “Okay let’s go before Mike and Nancy get weird and interrogate us,” you said, grabbing Eddie by the hand and making him laugh while shutting the door behind you.  Eddie held his van door open for you before walking around the other side and starting up the engine. Was that aftershave he was wearing?
Butterflies exploded in your chest. Oh my god, this is a date, you thought to yourself elatedly.
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Eddie’s place was nice, simple, and clean. He didn’t have much in the way of furniture or decor yet, but he had the basics, and it was all his.
You were halfway through Goodfellas– which was really good– and sipping on bud light bottles on opposite ends of the couch.  You were sitting with your legs curled underneath you, your left foot sticking out along the couch cushion.  Eddie reached over and gently laid a hand on your ankle, pulling your attention away from the film.
“I’m gonna grab another beer. You want anything?”
“Sure, you want me to pause it?”
“Nah, I’ve seen this twice already,” he said as he headed to the kitchen.
“Eddie!” you said, smiling. “Why didn’t you rent something you’ve never seen?”
“It doesn’t matter,” he called. “I love this movie.”
You picked up the remote and paused the film anyway.
“But it just came out on VHS!” you said, laughing. "How have you seen it multiple times already?"
He returned with two freshly opened beers and handed one to you. He sat down again, a little closer this time.
“What– you don’t watch movies over and over again every chance you get? Is that…like….not normal or something?” He smirked at his own sarcasm.
“Not that quickly I’m afraid,” you said, and he laughed out loud. 
“I guess I’m a bit of a fixator,” he said. “I fixate on things.”
“I suppose we all have things we fixate on,” you said.
“What do you fixate on?” He asked. He was leaning slightly in your direction. It made your heart speed up a little bit.
“Well lately,” you said, drawing out your syllables and pretending to think really hard about it. “Lately it’s been this guy.”
“Oooh,” Eddie said. “Tell me more.”
“Well, he looks a little rough around the edges, but it turns out that he’s the sweetest.”
“He is?” Eddie played along.
“Oh yes. And he has the biggest, most soulful brown eyes I’ve ever seen. It’s like he’s always seeing the world in new and interesting ways. And don’t get me started on his lips…”
“What about his lips?” Eddie asked.
“They’re so full and plump, like fruit, and I want to nibble on them.”
Eddie huffed a small laugh. “You want to nibble on his lips?”
“Among other things,” you said, a little breathily.
As your eyes flicked down to his lips, he licked them unconsciously, and you knew everything was about to change.
Eddie leaned forward, closing the distance between you, and he raised his right hand to cup the back of your head, pulling you forward. You felt his breath fan across your cheek as he rubbed his nose against yours.
“What other things did you have in mind?” he murmured.
“I want him,” you said simply. “But I don’t know how he feels.”
“Hmm,” Eddie cooed. “I think it’s safe to say he wants you too.”
“He does?”
“Oh yes,” he breathed, and then he kissed you.
Your breathing hitched– it was finally happening.
You enjoyed the simple feeling of his beautiful lips against yours for a moment before you parted your lips to deepen the kiss. You slotted his bottom lip between your teeth and applied gentle pressure. Eddie’s quiet gasp did things to you.
You chuckled, and rose up on your knees before pressing your body firmly against his, the movie now forgotten.
Eddie broke away, beaming. “I thought you probably felt the same way, but I wasn’t sure, and I was afraid to make a move and fuck it all up–”
“Shut up and keep kissing me,” you said.
He did as he was told. He also dialed up the passion, and you kissed each other hungrily, pouring nine months of longing into your efforts. Your tongues danced together, your hands roamed the expanse of his back, and you slid one hand up and under his shirt to feel his flesh.
Eddie gasped at your touch, and pulled away. His pupils were blown wide from the excitement, and you imagined that yours might look the same. He cupped the side of your face in his hands, boring his eyes into yours.
“Are we together? Are you mine?” he asked, and your heart broke and soared with equal measure at the sheer sweet earnestness of him.
“Yes, Eddie,” was all you could muster before he was kissing you again. He tipped you back and gently laid you down across the sofa, allowing his hand to travel up the length of your torso, keeping things chaste, but only barely.
You laid together and kissed deeply for a time, until you decided you’d had enough.
“Eddie,” you said.  “T– take me to bed.” 
“Are you sure? That’s really what you want?”
You nodded, but you couldn’t hide your nerves, and he gently pinched your chin to tilt your head up. “You seem anxious,” he said softly.
“Well, I – I haven’t actually done it before.” 
Eddie’s eyes widened slightly.
“I’ve done some stuff, a little hand stuff mostly, but never, uh– it. Sex. I’ve never had sex.”
Eddie smiled affectionately at your display of nerves. “Relax, babe. It’s okay. You don’t have to do anything you’re not ready to do.”
“But I am ready,” you said, more assuredly.  “I really want to do this with you. I want you to be my first.”
Eddie searched your face for any further signs of nervousness or unease, but all he saw in your eyes now was conviction and honestly. You reached up a hand and laid it on his cheek.
“Nine months I’ve waited for this. I knew a long time ago that you were the one, Eddie. I’ve waited long enough.’
Eddie nodded. “Okay,” he said softly.
He moved to stand and gently scooped you up in his arms, making you giggle, and he carried you over to the bedroom. He kicked the door open with his foot, making you laugh some more, and laid you on his bed, which was clean if unmade. He leaned down and braced himself on either side of your body to kiss you.
“If you want me to stop, just tell me,” he said between kisses, and then stood back up to pull his shirt over his head. He did it in one fluid motion, letting his soft curls dance across his shoulders and back, and he was a sight to behold. You’d seen him with no shirt on last summer when he took you swimming, but somehow this was different.
“May I?” he asked, and paused with his fingers above the fly of your denim shorts. You nodded, and let Eddie loosen the buttons before pulling your shorts down along your legs and tossing them aside.
You smiled up at him as he loosened his own jeans and pushed them down before stepping out of them, leaving him clad in nothing but his boxers. He returned to the bed and laid next to you, gently trailing one palm up your body and pushing up your shirt, resting it at the bottom of your ribcage just below the underwire of your bra. Eddie resumed kissing you; it was something you were quite sure you would never tire of. He was amazing.
After a beat he pulled away to look down at you. “I need to get you ready,” he said softly. “I don’t want it to hurt.”
“Okay Eddie,” you replied.  He pulled your shirt over your head gently, and then moved one hand to your back to unclasp your bra. 
“You seem to have some experience with this,” you said, feeling a stab of self-consciousness.
Eddie paused. “A little. I’m not a virgin, but I’m hardly a Casanova or anything…”
“It’s okay, I don’t need to know.” you looked away. 
Eddie was not pleased with the loss of eye-contact, and he could sense your discomfort. 
“Hey,” he said softly, turning your face to his. “It’s only been a couple different girls. I really haven’t had much action for a guy my age, trust me. And nothing serious, ever.” He kissed your forehead. “You’re special. I want this– I want it to be special.”
You relaxed and smiled. “Honestly, I’m fine.”
“You’re sure?”
“Completely.”
“Okay then.”
He pulled your loosened bra off, leaving you in only your knickers. “If you want me to stop, just tell me.”
Your answering smile was cut short as he bent and placed a kiss on your nipple. “You’re beautiful,” he murmured, before he sucked the little bud between his lips, setting all your senses alight. 
“Oh–that feels nice.” you sighed.
As Eddie suckled you, he slowly trailed his hand down the length of your torso, leaving goosebumps in its wake. He paused at the elastic of your underwear, slipping one finger just under the thin white band, but continued no further. 
“You can– ah– you can touch me Eddie,” you managed between gasps.
With no further preamble, he slowly slid his hand into the delicate cotton, and his fingers found your heat. He removed his mouth from your nipple, leaving it feeling cool and bereft, before kissing you lasciviously as he slowly pushed a finger inside of you. You gasped, but as quickly as he had entered, he was gone again. He dipped in smoothly a second time, but then turned his attention to your clit, applying gentle pressure and circling it with his moistened finger.
You arched your back and moaned at the sensation. Your senses were heightened, your heart was racing, and you couldn’t believe that you were here, with Eddie, after all this time. You were delighted; you’d waited so long for this, and you were going to enjoy it.
Eddie slowly picked up the pace and pressure of his ministrations. You felt as if all the blood in your body was rushing to the space between your legs, and your body began to tremble. It felt good– damn good. You could hear the wet sounds of your arousal as his fingers picked up speed, and then, without warning, he slid one back inside of you. You moaned as he pumped you with one finger, sliding out, stroking the sensitive button of nerves, pushing back in. You were teetering on the edge of climax when, suddenly, he stopped. 
“Wha–” you said blearily, as Eddie padded over to his nightstand. 
“I’m just grabbing a rubber babe,” Eddie smiled, as he pulled open the drawer and held up a foil square.
“Ah, right.”
“Just want to be careful, ya know?” 
“Of course.”
Eddie paused to look at you, his face painted with adoration and concern. “You sure you’re still okay with this?”
You nodded emphatically. “Yeah, yes.”
Eddie looked angelic. Flushed with desire, his hair slightly mussed, lips reddened from kissing, his boxers tented by his arousal. He walked around the bed to stand at the end, and he gently pulled your underwear off, leaving you fully exposed for the first time. You had to fight to resist the urge to curl into yourself protectively. You weren’t the only naked one for long, however, as Eddie pushed his boxers down, and you were able to see all of him for the first time.
He was beautiful. He was perfect.
He deftly rolled the rubber along his length before he laid down next to you, and let his fingers return to your heat. He leaned down and kissed your neck while he worked you open, this time with two fingers. He slid them inside as he kissed your lips and licked into your mouth, and then he gently climbed on top, allowing you to rest your calves around his hips.
You felt his tip prod your entrance.
“Are you ready?” he breathed into your ear.
“Yes,” you said, and he captured your earlobe with his teeth as he slowly started to push in.
“Ah– fuck,” you cried softly. It felt like white fire had ignited where you were joined and traveled up your body, settling behind your eyes, and a kaleidoscope of sparks clouded your vision. You squeezed your eyes shut and ground your teeth together as you moaned through the sensation. It hurt, but it was a sort of pain you’d never felt before.
“God, babe,” Eddie gasped as another shallow, gentle thrust pulled him deeper. “This okay?”
It wasn’t okay exactly, it stung like hell, but it was okay because this was Eddie, and there was nobody else on the planet you were willing to experience this with.
“Uhhuh, yeah,” you panted. “I’m okay.”
Eddie sat back on his heels and grasped your thighs with his hands, pulling you flush against him and seating himself fully inside of you. His eyes met yours and he smiled at you adoringly as he began to move.
You moaned in sweet agony as each thrust ignited new fires within you, but before you realized what was happening, the pain began to give way to intense pleasure. Your gasps of pain grew to cries of ecstasy, and Eddie could feel you yield to him, could feel the resistance temper, and he delighted in watching the change come over you. White fire was replaced by pure bliss.
He lifted your legs to rest your ankles on his shoulders, and picked up his pace. 
Eddie hugged your legs to his chest as he pumped, every thrust hitting deep, the mingled gasps and cries of your lovemaking growing in volume and timbre. You reached out a hand to touch his chest, but he was too far away. Eddie noticed this, and he released your legs to lean forward, bracing himself with his hands on either side of your shoulders, and he kissed you. It was damn hot, the passion of it all, making out so intensely that your teeth clattered together as he fucked you, all of your senses heightened and electrified.
You scratched at his back as your felt your climax building, causing his own pace to falter. Your cries of delight as you came caused his own orgasm to crash into him suddenly, and you both moaned as you rode it out together.
And then all was still.
You breathed together as you came down from the intense sensations you had just experienced, and you could feel Eddie’s heart beating in its cage, his chest pressed against yours. He could feel yours too.
After a moment, he got up, discarded the used condom, and slipped on his boxers, smiling down at your prone, naked body as he did so. “Was that okay? It didn’t hurt too much?”
You thought for a second. “It did hurt at first, that probably can’t be helped. But after a little while, it felt really good. Was I– was I any good?”
Eddie beamed. “Oh babe. You don’t have to ever worry about that. It was incredible.”  He headed to the bathroom, and returned shortly with a damp washcloth. He sat beside you and gently tended to your sore, sensitive area. The cool terrycloth was soothing, and he peppered your face with kisses, making you giggle. He tossed the washcloth aside and laid down with you, wrapping his arms around you to hold you close.
“Do you want to stay here with me? You can, if you want,” Eddie murmured into your hair. He sounded sleepy.
“Eddie, I want to be wherever you are,” you replied. You were feeling quite drowsy yourself.
“I don’t want the Wheelers to think I kidnapped you,” he said with a small chuckle.
“They know where I am, and we’re all adults, so I’m staying put.”
Eddie grinned. You had no way of knowing what was happening in his heart, but he wished he could transfer part of his joy to you, so you could feel even a fraction of his elation.
Eddie had no way of knowing that you were feeling exactly the same way. He also had no way of knowing that you were planning to transfer to Indiana State in the fall. In time, you would share your hearts fully with each other, but for the moment, you enjoyed just laying in his arms, and drifting off into blissful slumber.
Together. ♥
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