#but the way the musical is structured and deals with grief and reframing the past hit me directly on an emotional bruise

[teaandinanity]

Me: [is reminded the musical Fun Home exists]

Me: [spends the next three hours listening to Maps every other song]

#I suspect this musical hits very differently if you've lost a parent pretty young #like my relationship with my dad had almost 0 overlap #but the way the musical is structured and deals with grief and reframing the past hit me directly on an emotional bruise #which has still not healed after almost two decades #so when I first saw it I cried several times and I still have to kind of stop and catch my breath at a few songs #and maps is one of them #I saw a post once talking about grief as being like a button in a box #and there's a thing in the box - a balloon or a ball or whatever #and when the loss is fresh it's full and it presses on the button all the time #persistently and painfully #but as time goes by it gets smaller #and bounces around the box and doesn't always hit that button #but when it does the pain is the same it's just not all the time anymore #I suppose it's also true that the older I get the more context I have for the grief #but it's so strange to realize that it won't be that long until I'm older than my dad was when he died