#but yeah... im just like... either say something or dont bro | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

todayisafridaynight · 9 months

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Tsuma is an INSANE one to start on but also a fantastic one... I think my first was SP so it's so funny we've "traded" those specific shows lmao BUT YEAH. YEAH. I BELIEVE YOU. I'M GONNA BE NORMAL ABOUT KEISUKE BUT NOT ANYTIME SOON. Tsutsumi's Princess Peach lips every time Maida squishes his face 😭😭😭😭😭

The moment outside the school basically condenses everything about the show for me it's so perfect and cute but I'm INTERNALLY SCREAMING AT ALL OF THIS BEING SAID OUT LOUD... PLEASE... YOU'RE GOING TO END UP ANOTHER IMPRISONED TSUTSUMI... He really is SUCH a malewife though that's what destroyed me frame one... especially because he's really similar to how Tsutsumi talks about himself so like perfect casting I hope he had fun with the role... Definitely continuing when I can are you kiddinggggg

Well Hopefully You Still Think AtR's Cute And/Or Sweet Wherever You're At Now So The Rest Of This Isn't Embarrassing LGSKFJLGJ BUT YEAH... YEAH... I'm aro myself so all that's Complicated right, and definitely something I tried to consider when Sorta-Not-Really-Recommending, but it's good to hear it can be entertaining even without being able to relate :']

THAT COULD'VE GONE /WAY/ SOUTH AT THE PANEL but I'm glad everyone made it out unharmed😭😭😭BUT YEAH... at the end of the Ohashi arc when Ogata threw all his stuff off the desk and the gang just wordlessly put it back for him 'cause that's all they can do... ough. Momence. That's why it was so sick watching everything fall into place [temporarily]. Also appreciate the Jo-ism in doing all the dirty work for a politician in the family and wanting to be stopped without saying it upfront and uhhhhh being fine with dying and/or going to prison LMAO

OH BUT NO PROB it is always tradition for me to send the translated letter once I've indoctrinated someone new :] funny thing is every single version I've sent is different because I've been editing it to this day

AGAIN i chose tsuma cause the title was Utterly Insane and i just had to see for myself what the fuck was going on and im so glad i did... funny that we did trade first-watches (and fun that i get 'my own version' of ogata's letter lmao) :)

BUT YEAHYEAH keisuke's adorable.. like genuinely i think he's tsutsumi's cutest role ive seen so far its hard for me to imagine one topping it in regards to how endearing he is (❁´◡`❁) keisuke being so enamored by his wife but being So Blind To How Things Look is genuinely super funny. like poor guy really is just super happy to have his wife back in a way but not yk (╯▽╰;;; )

Horribly i think of okita from that Taboo movie when it comes to consuming media: even if i dont personally have that experience or understand 100%, i can still appreciate a good story and characters (im paraphrasing SO hard and with less homophobia </3), so if you got anythin good throw it my way anytime ♪(´▽｀) !! i'm about to start episode eight in a bit but NO WORRIES i still very much am a fan of the show !! and im sad/excited to see im almost done with it ( sad its almost over, but also SUPER interested to see how everything comes together in the end (☆▽☆) )

#long post #snap chats #tsutsumi drinking game where you have to guess his chara either ends up dead in jail or Somehow Ok ☠️☠️#keisuke's such a dork... he's literally such a puppy of a man right down to being Stupid Loyal it warms my heart (´▽`ʃ♡ƪ)#i LOVEE it when takae squishes his face cause I Repeat... he does look super cute and silly...#that's literally all i can say about him He's Cute And Silly and it's why he's one of my fave tsutsumi roles #the best things in life are cute and silly.... its why i love kirby...#now i wonder about how tsutsumi talks about himself if keisuke reminds you of him... inch resting... but i believe its a perfect casting..#BUT ANYWAY YEAH NO the one thing i like about psychology is that it helps me understand people more #or at least im more willing to investigate why X and Y is a thing for Z yk #so Again even if i havent personally experienced something or get it from a Personal perspective i can still work out how other people feel #and just immerse myself and still enjoy the media :)#AH BUT YEAH THE BIT WHERE OGATA THROWS ALL HIS STUFF ON THE GROUND lit the peak ABSOLUTE Top Ten momence #cause Yeah No we're ALL frustrated for him at this point with how much he keeps getting shot down for actually trying to do his job #but not do his job TOO well no cause God Forbid THAT happens i guess. again makes it hard to be mad at him for being out of pocket lmao #IN ANY CASE im gonna go do somethin quick then im gon finish AtR either within the next two hours or at least this morning BYE #birthday went fine nothing too remarkable happened other than my sis and her boyfriend made pizza and it was real good #then they my bro and i all played smash bros and i was trying my best Not to play too seriously cause ik my sis and her bf dont game much #but my bro and i do and i at least wanted to give em a chance to have fun ☠️ alright ima go take care of That Thing BYE

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mrfoox · 1 year

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Me sharing sappy shit to others:

Them: um???? Ok....

Me: 🥺 (I'm so cringe now)

Others sharing sappy shit with me:

Them: ☺️

Me: 😳 (oh my God be normal about this come on)

#miranda talking shit #I told oliver i trusted him quicker than usual and i was wondering why that was. And that i dont feel the need to act in front on him #And he doesnt either. So i was like uwu thats so good and he was like: uh yeah thats good #Having guy friends is just them not understanding why tf im bringing up cringe shit and me being like im love you idiot #I love soft shit. I am trying to keep myself under wrap and not say things too often bc i know others dont like it thay much #But when i do im like bro... Please ... Listen... Bro........ Fabian have known me for years and know that but oliver i havent shown that #Side so much of. I also asked him if he trusts me and he was like ????? What a weird question and i was like yeah i said before #Hand that it was a weird question. 'yeah i mean.... I trust your judgment and i think like your mom said if you say something you've though #About it for a long time so you know you're certain about it? So yeah i trust you.#I kinda assumed he trusted me bc... I mean yes he have told me some stuff but i was curious why so lol #'when did you think of this?' 'uh idk. Before bed i think' 'so you laid down and thought 'hmm wonder if oliver trusts me or not?''#Lmao... Not quite how it went but he wasnt completely wrong. My before bed thoughts are always out there man I think of many things

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womenloverlmao · 29 days

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Spencer Reid NSFW Alphabet

He's so babygirl

Im not adding warnings or like whats included because this is all over the fucking place and yeah that's nobody's fault but my own but still

Dont like it dont read it, dont complain.

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

He thinks it's so fucking important, he could probably go off on a rant about it, too. (But let's be honest, he can go off on a rant about anything.) He thinks it creates an emotional bond, shit like that. Even though he's the sub, he does like to take care of you after you take care of him.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

His favorite (and yours of his) are his hands. He knows he knows what to do with them, driving you absolutely crazy. He also 100% teases you with it too, just saying. He can be insecure sometimes about certain things, but he knows them.

He loves your thighs and tits. Let's be honest, we all know he's a boob guy.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

He cries when he climaxes sometimes.

Also he either likes cumming in you or on your tits. (Bro is obsessed with the tibbies)

D = Dirty secret (pretty self-explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Sometimes steals your panties, but he puts them back (after washing them) and you don't really notice. He also knows how to hide it so like

This one you know about, he was getting INTO it and he got a work call that he had to pick up while he was still inside you. A couple whimpers were let out when you moved against him and it was so embarrassing but no one besides you two know. they thought he was sick because he is a sickly victorian child

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

Bro is not experienced at all, he was a virgin before you, but he knows what he's doing from reading so fucking much about literally everything. Sure, he might be awkward at first, but once he's done it once and is sure you like it he's pretty good at everything.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

He likes when you're on top, but his favorite is when your legs are thrown either around his waist or over his shoulders as he absolutely pounds into you like a bitch in heat.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? Are they humorous? etc.)

there are moments where even when he is balls-deep inside you you both can't help but laugh. he sometimes spews random facts and he can't shut himself up so it can be really a mess but you both love it.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

It all depends on your preferences. He keeps it relatively short, but if you need it shorter he'll do it.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

It's 100% Intimate, even if it can be silly sometimes. it's just different, in your own way, really.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

When he's on his own in a hotel room and you're back home and he needs you, he'll do it. Most of the time he needs your voice to do so, but he knows when you go to bed, and if it's before that he will call you but if it's not he'll do it on his own. If you send him pictures of yourself? uses them. he won't admit it, but he does.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

Mommy kink. I don't need to elaborate.

Orgasm Denial

Overstimulation

B r e e d i n g.

Degradation but only a little, you have to add praise to it and then it's fine.

Kinda like possession?? But not like in a keeping you or him locked up, in a 'you're mine' way.

Hair pulling.

Probably into pegging

Nipple play on you.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

Bedroom. That's pretty much it. He gets to thinking too much anywhere else. He gets too into thinking in the bedroom, how do you expect him to fuck you in a bathroom shawty

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

You in his clothes. Dirty talk. Sometimes it's nothing specific, and he's touch-starved so he can act like a teenager.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

I feel like he would stay away from bondage after Hankel. Before then, he would be fine, but chances are this all takes place after so yeah no. Same reason for spanking and shit. It may look like he's super kinky, but there are more things he wouldn't do than things he would.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

He likes when you give him head but dude would do anything if you let him eat you out. He's absolutely amazing. He has your body memorized, so like

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

He can do whatever, but when he's trying to make himself cum (normally after he's made you cum and leaves you super fucking overstimulated but he wants to cum so badly) he's fast and like holy f u c k. but he knows how you like it, so before then it's whatever makes you cum quickest so he can cum. also random but I forgot to put that he always makes you cum first.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

Will do them, but prefers having time with you and that shit.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

He is but if it's something listed up there it's a no. He could try different things but there are many things that he just wouldn't do.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

Can go like three five-minute rounds with breaks in between them, but when he's doing it on you he will probably overstimulate you to no end just trying to make you feel good.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

He doesn't have anything but if you wanted to do things with them, they could be implanted.

If you got a dildo he would let you use it on him after a little bit of convincing.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Depends on the day and if he's being a dom or a sub, but even inside of those it depends. He leans more submissive and loves to please you, but he is 100% a brat and will tease you.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

He is l o u d. he can be quiet but he will whimper, moan, whine, beg. (bitch in heat I'm not sorry)

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

He loves listening and being the sub while being the top. Like... do you get what I mean?

Also one time he was in you, rubbing your clit, trying to get you to cum and he said 'Did you know about 75% of the clitoris is inside the body' and you actually burst out laughing and yall had to stop what you were doing and like gather everything and make sure you didn't die while he was inside you again.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

6.5 inches, and thick. like, ripping your vagina from the inside out thick. (why am I set on this hill please murder me slowly)

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

It wasn't high. until you came around, then he is just like EVERY MOMENT OF THE DAY turned on. it's physically impossible, or it should be.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

If it weren't so icky in his head he could probably fall asleep immediately afterwards, but he has to clean it up and then he can fall asleep.

#criminal minds #spencer reid #criminal minds x reader #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x you #criminal minds x you #spencer reid scenario #spencer reid headcanon #headcanons

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bug-bites · 3 days

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batfam beach episode?? real not clickbait no glue no borax??

cw: nothing! pure vacation beach fluff (p≧w≦q) also barely proofread,,,

pairing: gn!reader x batfam (NOT ALL AT ONCE.)

characters: dick grayson, jason babygirl todd, cassandra cain, tim drake, damian wayne (all intended to be interpreted as either romantic or platonic unless its damian. ik in some comic runs he's like an adult but hes like permanently 12 in my head and i dont fw that :/)

a/n: im back with a new dc obsession tee hee (soz to everyone who wanted more abt the cod guys or spiderverse im comicsmaxxing and redhoodpilled) will probably make a part 2 w/ bruce, babs, steph, and duke eventually :3c

Dick Grayson haha dick

oh he loves the beach so much

the sand beneath his feet make him feel nostalgic from when he would practice tumbling with his parents in the circus ring i think there's sand in circus rings right? I dunno someone fact check me on that one

the victim of being buried in the sand, always asks for a mermaid tail but ends up with something like massive sand tits (courtesy of either tim or jason), he laughs it off anyways

somehow gets the worst tan lines. He wore a swim shirt one time and never again because the tan lines looked SO BAD which is a total shame because he tans gorgeously

will beg to do play shoulder wars i have no clue if this is the right name, again fact check me for this thing where you get a piggyback ride from someone and you try to knock someone whos also getting a piggyback ride over in the water

you’re on his shoulders since bro is strong asf and you square up against tim and damian

obviously you lose because hello that's damian wayne we are talking about but at least its fun!!

cass and jason are forever the undefeated champions of shoulder wars though, that goes without saying

Cassandra Cain

shes always seen beach episodes in animes that damian practically dragged her into watching so when she gets to actually go to a beach she is so excited peak sibling bonding is dragging your siblings into your interests

loves building sandcastles and writing things in the sand, watching it get washed away, and then do it all over again

hold her hand and jump over waves together on the shore and she will be the giggliest and happiest human being alive on planet earth

but out of all the beach activities she loves beach volleyball

shes actually scarily good at beach volleyball for someone who has never played volleyball before

dick thought it would be fun to teach her and have a friendly match between him and bruce vs you and cass

yeah bruce and dick were COOKED. huffing and puffing like they have a vendetta against the three little pigs at the end of it while cass is like “this is so fun, lets go again!”

ends the day with a little sunset stroll along the shore i need her so bad you do not understand please bbyg ill treat u soooo well

Jason Todd

beaches are fun on paper for him, in person not so much

PERSONAL HC INCOMING! He gets migraines after the lazarus pit so he can only have so much fun before needing to lie face down with his head covered with a beach towel to make everything less overwhelming or he wears sunglasses the entire time

he brings a book to read at the beach and stays in the shade the entire time yes he is that bitch

usually at home in the comfort of his little library he likes to read things that have an impact on him or just stuff that makes him want to analyze deeper. think books like frankenstein, lord of the flies, all quiet on the western front, just generally heavier stuff

but his vacation books? totally different. usually something super light, maybe a shitty romance book that you find in walmart which are clearly just results of book packaging, or a some booktok recommendation he got for shits and giggles because it just was so laughably bad, maybe even a childhood feel-good book like percy jackson or the little prince (mostly just books he would not grieve over if sand permanently got in between the pages)

he tried reading a colleen hoover book once and honest to God wanted to toss it into the ocean HE WOULD HATE HER BOOKS AND I WILL DIE ON THIS HILL

but out of everything he likes watching you enjoy yourself, his book wasnt that important anyways. show him that funky sand dollar you found or that really cool piece of seaglass, he’s probably gonna bring it home with him. a little keepsake along with the millions of grains of sand that never seem to go away

Tim Drake

Burns so easily

At first its kinda cute, like hes asking you to help him get that spot on his back he just cant seem to reach and its just a little sweet moment between you two as you rub the sunscreen into his sore muscles

But then it happens again. And again. And again to the point when he goes up to you, you automatically reach for the tube of SPF 100+

I just know his vitamin d deficiency goes crazy

Leaves the beach looking like a lobster, sunburnt, a crazy bump on his head from getting hit with a volleyball, and some god awful sunglasses tan lines

Overall, beach activities are not really his thing bros job is NAWT beach

Enjoys the boardwalk a lot more than the beach itself, likes the touristy stuff but still goes to the beach because dick loves it and he loves his older brother :(

Damian Wayne

i feel like he wouldn’t care too much for typical beach stuff. like at every beach that has sand and decently clean water you can do most beach activities

one thing that is never 100% consistent at all beaches is what lives on the beaches. this boy will spend hours staring into tidepools

bruce was lowk concerned because his son did not gaf about normal beach activities that kids do but eventually he reached a point where he was like "i mean at least hes having fun and being safe"

i feel like talia would always show him books of sea creatures when he was little but he never ended up being able to see them in their natural habitat someone take this boy to an aquarium now

tells you fun facts about each creature you come across

will scold you if you take a shell from the beach, definitely says some shit like “how would you feel if someone ran into your house and just took your bed?” based though, leave shells at the beach yall! taking them is like bad for the ecosystem

brings his notebook around and has little sketches of the sea creatures

even though typical beach activities arent his favourite, he doesnt hate it. he likes that he can catch a break from all the vigilante stuff and spend time with his family as a family and not just as a team

loves scuba diving. idk it just somehow makes sense and i think he would look really stupid in a wet suit

also i feel like he would never mention it but in his mind hes fully thinking "this is just like a beach episode" but he would rather die than say it out loud FUCKING NERDDD

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sturniol0s · 2 months

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DARE. MATT STURNIOLO

part 2

matt x fem!reader

a harmless prank wont hurt right?

warnings- use of y/n, swearing, smut, high matt, p in v, weed.

matt’s pov

I stood outside shuffling through my keys trying to get to the house key. i walked in to hear chris, nick, and nate all in the living room taking turns to play ‘mario carts’.

“yo, how’d it go? did you guys fuck?” chris asks

“no, but she thinks i like her” i respond as i sit beside him

“bro, you know what would make the prank even better? you should text her” chris says

“i’ll try” i say as i get up

as im heading upstairs i cant help to smile from how good the prank is going. i grab my phone from my pocket and text her, mostly the only time i did text her was when i started getting f’s in junior year of high school and need the homework answers.

Me: Hey. I had a good time with you today!

Y/n: yeah! it was fun

Me: Do you wanna smoke weed? my brothers are getting on my nerves and i need a distraction.

Y/n: yeah! sure

Me: K, pick you up in 10

y/n pov

the next hour moved painfully slow. This is either because im waiting to see matt or because im waiting for weed.

matt and i have never talked about anything other than him asking for homework answers or just him messing with me in general.

while i wait i put on a blue oversized zip up and black cargo pants. i get a text from matt saying he’s outside my apartment.

Matt: Im here!

Me: okay, give me a minute to get outside

Matt: No, i mean im at your front door.

i get a knock on the door. i run to open the door.

“matt!!” i say as i hug him

“hii” he says while laughing

“i dont think anyone has ever been that excited to see me” he added

i chuckle as we are on our way to the car.

“so where are we going?” i ask

“my house” he replys

“okay” i say

matt starts holding my hand. i smile as he looks at me.

“why are you smiling?” he says while laughing

“no reason” i shrug

15 minutes later

we pull in to his drive way and he gets out the car to open my door.

“thank you!” i say

“yeah of course” he replies

as we enter the house i can see his brothers stare at us walk up to his room.

Matt digs his hand into the pocket of his pants. “here” he says as he pulls out a bag.

“thank you” i smile, giving him a kiss before sitting down on the floor.

“thats all i get?” he frowns

“yeah, for now! come smoke this weed with me”.

matt follows me and sits beside me against a wall.

“want me to roll it” he offers as he watches me fail

“mhm” i hum

me and matt have smoked together a couple times before but we haven’t done it in a couple weeks.

“can you pass me a lighter?” matt asks.

i pass him the lighter while i continue to watch him.

he turns his body facing me. “open your mouth”

i do as he says, sucking on his thumb as he uses it to seal the joint shut.

he holds the joint against my lips, and i take it between them, letting him light the other end.

i inhale the smoke entering my mouth.

before i can let out the smoke, he lifts my chin up and kisses me. as my mouth is partly open. the smoke goes in between our mouths.

he smiles at me.

i hold the joint in front his face, letting him grab it with his mouth and take it between his fingers.

“your so beautiful ma” matt says

“thank you” i say as he hands the joint back to me

after a few minutes of silence i decide to ask him a question

“do you like me?” i ask him

“yes, do you?” he replies

“yeah” i say

“come here, ma” he demands

i sit on his lap and he kisses me, after making out for god knows how long he stops and smothers me with wet kisses.

“matt. i need you” i whisper

“i know, i know” he says

matt carry’s me to the bed.

We make out for some time. i lost track of it. i don’t even know if this is the weed or if its just me. my hips aimlessly lift up to find something to create some sort of friction.

what are we doing? im kissing the person i “hated” for 9 years.

we continue making out on the bed as he takes his shirt off, his hands slide to the bare skin under my shirt, with out a second though i take my shirt off completely forgetting i don’t have a bra on

“fuck, your so pretty”

he softly kisses my chest, flicking his tongue over my nipples before sucking them.

he slowly starts unbuttoning his jeans and pulls them down only leaving him with boxers. he slowly starts taking them off.

he pulls my pants and underwear off all together.

“wet for me already?” he says

“matt, please” i whisper

“i know, i know” he says before putting my legs over his shoulders and pushing inside of me.

i grip onto a pillow as my body adjusts to his size. matt gasps in pleasure. he drops his head to my neck, letting me hear his soft whimpers as he feels me clenching around him

he starts thrusting into me. both of us hearing the sound of our skin echo in the room.

im having sex with my so called enemy.

he pushed one of my legs, spreading me more.

“fuck” i yell out.

“gotta be quite if u want me to keep going” matt warns me. he puts his hand over my mouth.

his dick hits every spot perfectly. i find my self begging for him, moaning his name, something we both would never expect.

he pounds in to me watching his cum fill me up as my cum drips around him.

he drops beside me and gets up to grab a towel.

“here” he says as he hands me a towel. I clean my self up and grab my panties and put it back on as i lay back in his bed waiting for him to come in.

he puts sweat pants on and a black shirt.

he gets in bed and puts his hands on my waist and his head on my neck.

i love you

“i love you to” matt replies

part 3?🔥

tag list: @ghostlypineappl @chrisloyalgf @heartz4janellieeeeeee @hearteyesformatt @mattyb333 @sturnioloslife @delilahluvsu @b2cute @nellyjan-th @jeanieswagger @tillies33ssss @mattsbabetbh @mattswrld @tapesmatts @sturnsvlg @sturniologirl813 @vane2realz @sturnzsblog @kiibichio @sturniolho @bernardsleftbootycheek @sturniolobessed @ihateeveryone357474 @bb-1s-blog @samandcolbyfan22 @misslilsassafras04 @blahbel668 @stapley0urmouthshut @mirandakay20 @vinniehackerslefttoe @melonjollyranche @hopefuljellyfishcollection @suyqa @bluesturniolo333 @sofiabrown1 @iluvm4ttsturni0l0 @tay-laaaaa

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ma3mae · 8 months

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Don't be so annoyed, love!

Summary: He's so annoying sometimes but it's ok because you love him 😭 (HC w/ Dazai, Kunikida, Ranpo)

Genre: Crack, fluff, lowkey suggestive themes

Warnings: 🗿 we ignoring the red flags bc we can. also mentions of farting bc dazai 🗿🗿🗿🗿🗿

A/N: u cant tell me that they wouldnt do any of these things ok 💀also kunikida's got a small drabble out of nowhere but im always wildin when it comes to him 😭😭😭😭😭

Dazai Osamu

u cant tell me that as soon as hes rly comfortable in ur relationship that he WOULD NOT be ashamed of just farting outta nowhere honestly 💀

Like yall r just chilling on the couch, watching smth and he just lets it all out bc why should he hold himself back 🗿

Hes at home 🗿

But bro's lucky he doesnt smell but 🗿🗿🗿🗿 wheres the warning from him

u give him the side eye and hes like "What? Are you perhaps ashamed of human nature, bella?" like ok we'll leave him alone but he ruined the emotional moment of the movie yall were watching 😭😭😭

Is also the type to prob leave his socks and clothes lying around

It got better over time but he still sometimes does it bc old habits die hard i guess 🧍

once got so bad you just collected all of his clothes and put them infront of the door so he'd have no choice but to pick all of that up and do it himself 💀

would try to talk his way out of it in the beginning but also felt kinda bad after the relationship got more and more serious

So now hes a good bf/ husband and does it himself 🤩 (with the occasional sock under the couch 💀)

drinking habits would take a bit longer to be fully gone, he'd learn to regulate it over time

He's learned to warn you tho when he thinks that a rly shitty day might hit him bc work and more

sometimes you take the day off and do something together to take his mind off of it

Sometimes you're at work and a "im home" text without hearts will come and you know whats wrong

would feel more comfortable over time letting you take care of him

will definitely show you his appreciation for you the next days in one way or the other 🤩💅

talking about living together, yall would often have to sit down to talk about his spendings bc our man cant save for ANYTHING

Used to often come home with little things like "Look, this reminded me of you!" and it's a plushie of a cat or something

Started off cute and small but got dramatic like him really fast

ngl he came home with a expensive necklace u liked when the both of u went shopping but u didnt buy it bc.. she expensive...

like he was charming as always with his "Tada! Guess what I've got you?~ 😋" ".... Not the necklace...? 😧" "🤩 How did you guess that right, bella??" "😨😨"

THIS man right here wouldnt even hesitate to just right out fking steal shit for you if u want it bc thats how much Power u got over him he'd never admit that tho sksks... OK maybe in bed...

he'd def either blackmail or bribe chuuya into helping him with stealing

probably even has access to his bank account and you'd only realize that when he'd stand infront of your door, asking where that "f*cking b*stard" is

you'd legit have to mediate their convo or else the whole building you live in would be gone immediately skks 💀

Chuuya likes u so he wouldnt make yall pay for it bc he knows that dazai's nearly broke 24/7 and u dont deserve to pay for his fault 💅

it would be enough to destroy his pride to make him obey chuuya for like 2 weeks or sum cue evil cackling from said red head

queen of Gaslightining nr. 1 😭 sometimes its for the dumbest arguments tho like why its okay to smack your lips while eating 😭

"I don't know it's just really noisy and kinda annoying for me?" "But Bella, that shows just how tasty your food is or are going to deny that fact and say that I should not show my appreciation for it? What if for me personally it's a sign of a good meal?" "Yeah but doesnt need to be that for me. Also you can show your appreciation for it in other ways like just simply saying its delicious?"

"But actions speak louder than words, my love." "YEAH, well then what do you want then???"

Its just a whole shit show and would (lmao it WILL) end in him giving you just shameless bedroom eyes and well you know whats gonna be after dinner lmaooo 🤡😭

Also also i do believe that hes not the best cook at first but hes a real fast learner so it prob would only take him a week of consuming cooking videos and reading books and BOOM

"Samu, is this a 3 course meal you're cooking because that's a LOT of ingredients in the kitchen." "Sssh just sit down, wash yourself up and enjoy the evening, my love! I'll call you when I'm done 💕"

Manages to somehow still give you some snacks and drinks in between the cooking 😭 with some sneaked in kisses on your shoulder or lips 😏

If you go and hug him from behind, he'll be MELTING

Like nuzzling your face into his back while wrapping your arms around his torso, you feel the slight rumble in his chest as he chuckles at your cute action 😭

"If you want to eat something then you should take a break from being so cute, you know? Don't want the food to go bad from maybe getting a bit distracted if you stay here for a bit longer." "Ew, are you implying you'd start something infront of our food??"

"... Well, I can just have a whole meal by myself but you'd be left hungry so it's your choice 😋"

🗿 the way he doesnt need long to be turned on is alwaya amazing to u but thats just how whipped he is and bro is a whole snack himself so WHOS complaining 😋💅

food's is guaranteed to taste heavenly but if he knows youve got time, then he'd make excuses to taste your cooking like

"Samu, it's been a while since I've gotten to taste your cooking." "Aww, was it that delicious for you? Hmm but I actually prefer your cooking!"

Time for some cooking and baking lessons together, eoow 💅 with the occasional make out session because the sauce found it's way on your lips and he just had to clean it up with his 😭😋

honestly despite all of some of the difficulties, dazai would never fail in making you feel loved in his own way even tho u gotta peel back some layers 🗿

At the end of the day, his bear hugs and many kisses are smth u love to come back home to after work

also doesnt say it but would def be a house husband for u 🤩 with the occasional "whoops gotta go and do smth quick" text and he comes home at like midnight skks bc the agency needs his cute ass 😋 but dw dinner's ready and house chores have been done so enjoy ur evening after work, zurlie 💅

dont kill me for this but id give him a 7.5/10 😭

Obsessed with him and i love him but it would prob be really really exhausting to get him to FULLY trust you and its honestly understandable

Also he kinda makes me feel like i'd have to walk on eggshells around him because you often dont really know what hes thinking 😭😭

could smile at u while thinking "why u so ugly" 😭😭

also bro is so smooth, its scary like he'd prob make us forget immediately that hes trying to find out everything about us(why he sounding like a stalker 😨😨 wouldnt want him to be MY stalker 😨😨 or would I?? 🤩) MY DELULU BRAIN 👹

Doppo Kunikida

😨 Cleaning maniac

personification of the verse "I can COOk, i can CLEAN" (i know its "dont" instead of can but we all know hes like perfect house husband material... maybe a bit too perfect 💀💀💀👹)

If u forgot a cup on the dinner table, he'd legit take the cup, put it in ur hand and be like "why did u leave it there if u r not using it"

WILL def rant about why u shouldnt do it

Honestly huge nagging mom vibes 💀💀

At the beginning of moving in together, he'd just clean everything without a word whatsoever

Like you wanna help around the house too? NUH UH, he already finished everything up.

Vaccuming the house? Done

Swiping? Lmao be sure to not arrive at home after work around that time bc u gotta stand at the door and WAIT until the floor is dried 💀😭

Dishes have been done like at 5 in the fucking morning 💀👹

Bro thankfully doesn't wash clothes that often (gotta be careful of the water bill 😭) but there r days where he legit throws his clothes nearly everyday bc the worse the mission the more blood yk 🗿🗿

U had to legit drag his ass to the couch to talk to him bc he gonn be deep clean the house if someone doesnt stop him

"Kuni, you literally don't need to do EVERYTHING by yourself! I'm also here to help and frankly, it feels like you're my maid sometimes 😞" " Don't worry. Everything fits perfectly in my time plan and since you sometimes work overtime, it's better if I do a bit more of it."

... "🗿 You are legit saving this city from being destroyed so often and I just sit in the office, bro 🤡" "I understand your argument but I have seen the way you look tired so often so let me take a bit of your burden"

He knows how to make us go "🥺"

The argument prob went on for an hour until yall settled on making a plan on who does what on which days and if someone's gotta work overtime or sum then the other takes a bit of it over and so on

So in the end its alrighty 🎉

Groceries and so on are never a problem except it sometiems turns out like going shopping with your mom because...

"Omg Kuni, look!!" *holds up cute decoration* "We could put this on our dinner table! Isn't it cute 🥺??"

Bro just takes it from you and looks at the price. Legit gives you the 🤨 look

"That's 937,32 Yen (around 6€) 🤨🤨. For a tiny statue of a dog? We could find it somewhere way cheaper." "🥺 But it's a limited edition and it reminds me of you bc its got the same fur color 🥺. It's even got ur glasses on 🥺"

Bro will say no but the day after you spot the dog on the table 🤡

Yall lying in bed together and cuddle so give him a peck on the lips while killing him with your cute ass smile (U MURDERER 🗿🗿)

"What was that for?" "Hmmm, well I just noticed that said statue magically appeared on our table. You think it was a cute long haired fairy with glasses and a grumpy look 😋? "

He tries really hard to deadpan at you but the corner of his lips still tug upwards as he pinches your nose

"Well, sometimes its not so bad to buy a little extra, I guess."

If theres a market nearby with some really good deals then you'd either be dragged together with him or he'd come home after work with tons of bags

Always surprises you in how good he is at negotiating about the price

Sometimes you gotta stop him from arguing with some of the shop keepers because some decided to sell some items way too overpriced 🗿🗿🗿

you once found him stay up all night researching about reasonable prices for veggies... 😨

and cue to yall standing in the morning infront of said shop keeper getting absolutely destroyed in an argument by your man.. 😮‍💨😮‍💨😮‍💨

Well guess who even got some extra free stufd because kuni terrified the shit out of him 😋

"Thank you for your hard work in harvesting and selling us these delicious vegetables. My wife is quite a fan of them." Your husband said as he put the money into the shop keepers shaky hands, face red in embarassement as he squeezed out a "It's nothing." between his teeth. His face paled at the words "We'll see each other next Monday. Until then have a great week." leaving your man's mouth as he gave him a friendly smile before taking your hand and going to the next stall,only for you to sheepishly wave goodbye to the shop keeper before going with your husband.

"Well, you gave him quite the scare back there." You said as you felt him squeeze your hand a bit tighter, the bustling of the array of people only increasing by minutes. "Someone had to correct his ways. It would help his sales but only if he's willing to take that advice seriously." he simply answered as he looked at the contents of the bag, counting the ingredients left to purchase.

"Well atleast we got ourselves more than we needed so we can go home and call it a day." "Who are you?" Chuckling at your surprised face out of the corner of his eyes, he continued to make his way towards the end of the market, to finally reach your car.

"I thought over your words and I do believe it would be nice to" laze around together "for once in a while. Everything in the house has already been done, so maybe we could try out that one series you've been talking about. The reviews seem to be quite positive about it."

He just lets a breathy laugh escape his lips at your squeal while you begin to rant on why its gonna be so good watching it and

UUUUGGHHGH 😭😭😭😭 GIVE ME KUNIKIDAAAAAAAGHHHHHH 😭😭😭🤡🤡👹👹👹

honestly there are like no real red flags like his red flags are disguised green flags and yall can legit work through it easily

The only thing would be his tendency to overwork himself and it could lead to an argument but never a real fight because hes pretty easy to reason with

Like even when hes stubborn, he'll STILL listen to your words because the many good things about him that he'd always make sure to take your words seriously 🗿🗿

which sometimes makes it tempting to tease him bc we can lowkey understand why dazai easily tells him the most outrageous shit and your man just casually writes it down in his notebook 😭

"That damn idiot managed to fool me again by telling me that aliens have been among us (AMOGUS 👹) and that the goverment has been hiding it from us for decades." "I thought you already knew about that tho?"

"What" "What?"

"Wait so they're real?"

Cue to him showing him a video (that dazai sent to you a week ago just for this moment 😭)

Lmao dont tease him too much tho but dw, he cant stay mad at you at all lmao 😋💅

Honestly a 8.5/10 bc his nagging scares me 💀😭

Edogawa Ranpo

"Greatest Detective" more like "Queen of Gaslightining" 👹👹

Everyone knows hes way too obsessed with sweets but how the hell is his teeth actually still existing 🗿🗿

ngl i believe fukuzawa would prob sometimes just randomly ask him if he brushed his teeth bc he lowkey lowkey raised him ok 🤡

Ranpo is all nice like "yup, i did." but when u ask him, hes a whole b*tch about it

"Hah??? Why would you ask me that?? Do you really believe that I'd be so dumb to forget about brushing my teeth? If i can solve the most difficult cases then why would you assume that brushing my teeth might something that I'd forget, huuuhh??"

His gaslightining used to work at the beginning of ur relationship but sooner or later its not hard to notice his patterns 🗿

Like yas ok, he could just put up a whole ass strategy in how to not get u to notice that he didnt brush em at all but bro

Hes too lazy

And hes a sucker for attention 😩 like he might be "annoyed" if u nag at him bc of smth but he absolutely loves it bc its just one of his many ways to get ur attention without him having to actively get up and get it for himself 🤡🤡🤡🤡

Hes a huge clown but i love him 😭

Dazai tends to forget his socks or smth lying on the floor but THIS mf right here just doesnt rly care 😭

Like that was the first thing u noticed when u entered his apartment 🤡

Its not right out messy on a disgusting degree, its more like theres tons of trinkets n shit from cases or just random candy wrap hidden under the couch 💀💀💀

The epitome of "I can do it tomorrow" bc bro doesnt forget, he just IGNORES that he has to do it 😭

might take a while to actually get him to yk do smth around the house

used to prob only sleep and shower at his apartment and thats it💀

But when hes whipped then hes whipped and hed actually try his best to help around the house

Key word "try" 🤡

Like its often tbh accompanied by "okay, ill do it but only if i get smth"

A MANCHILD, I SAY 👹👹👹👹

But there are days when he legit deep cleans everything by himself bc either you had a bad day or yall had a fight 👹👹

still would whip out the "now gimme something, please 😋" if yall cuddle after a fight and he cleaned and tidied everything up for his love 🤩

doesnt always have to be candy yk HEUEHEUEHEUUE 👹👹👹👹👹

also its not a surprise but dont let him near the kitchen

HE COULD

HE RLY COULD COOK SO WELL

Like he had only cooked for ONE time and it was like a fever dream

Bc u legit had a fever and he cooked chicken soup but uhm 🗿

he cooked it so good??? Like veggies n meat cut and cooked up nicely?

Broth kicking in real hard?

Like? "What the hell? I thought you couldn't cook??"

Bro is about to put that spoon fr away 💀

"I'm not so heartless to let you starve and I definitely wont be giving you some cheap soup either. I just looked it up on the internet and followed the instructions so you gotta get well soon because I miss your cooking 🤩🤩"

Are we flattered?? Gurl, maybe but he'd def know if we tried to make ourselves be sick to taste his cooking again

Bro only offers to help when it comes to baking 😪😮‍💨😮‍💨

His only help is licking the dough or chocolate outta the bowl or smth 😀

would sneak in many kisses tho bc he likes u and sweet stuff is just sugar overload for him and he loves it 🤩

I think one of the important factors for him in a relationship is that fukuzawa approves of you? Since he does value his opinion over his own intellect

Like bro trusted him when it came to Fukichi and other ppl 💀

fukuzawa could legit go "aliens r evil" and ranpo would be like "ok everyone, aliens are evil!!!!" 🗿🗿🗿

honesrly i dont think why there would be a reason for fukuzawa not to accept you (if there is one then time to take 100 steps back and reflect on urself 💀)

He'd prob be impressed on how u even fell in love with him bc.. its ranpo💀

petty, clingy, can be manipulative ( but never with ill intentions), would legit prank ur ass bc he can, impatient and quickly bored af

But hes attentive, kind, can be patient when it comes down to it, empathetic (depends sksks) (also thank u fukuzawa for kinda ramming that into his head 🤩), affectionate in his own way (a sucker for physical touch but would NEVER right out admit it 🗿) and so much more honestly

there arent any real red flags tbh (might come as a surprise for some ppl)

Maybe maybe he'd obviously have a bit of difficulty fully opening up and i do believe there might be times where he once or twice legit deducted what ur feelings r for him bc hes used to being careful around people and especially bc in case someonw could randomly target the agency

Or is some kinda criminal in general

But honestly when hes learned to trust you then you know youve got yourself someone loyal 💅 and i mean FR loyal

personal favorite hc and honestly prob canon since we've already seen it : he'd not be ashamed to throw hands at someone when he thinks you're being insulted or harassed

And with hands i mean exposing them to 100% until they are pissing their pants and begging him to leave them alone 🤩🤩🤩

Also also, gives me off a similar vibe to dazai with the "maybe having to walk on eggshells" around them but ranpo doesnt make you feel as watched tbh as dazai which would kinda make it easier to talk to

but bro isnt as smooth as him so whOOP 💀💀

Overall iconic and a solid 8/10 🤩🤩🤩💕💕💕

The random ratings i gave them LMAO 💀💀💀 hope u like em 🗿

#bsd x reader #bungou stray dogs x reader #dazai x reader #bsd dazai #kunikida x reader #bsd kunikida #ranpo x reader #bsd ranpo #dazai osamu #kunikida doppo #ranpo edogawa

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rzyraffek · 8 months

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Platonic yandere yautja x human child reader

Aww dad yautja😊 I didn't write for yautjas in months!! Hopefully u enjoy it!! Also i used they/them for kid. No tw, only cuteness and wholesome dad figure yautja👹 request open

Dad yautja with human kid

Bro is confused ??? Tf??? Why is there a child here??

He either found them abandoned in middle of nowhere or accidentally killed their perents, by 'accidentaly' i mean ofc he wanted to kill them he just didn't know there was a child nearby and now he feels bad

Kinda finds human pups ugly😭 why are you so smol and loud wtf

Dad!yautja after he kinda adopts y/n he gets too overprotective! Like dude won't leave their side at all, especially when you guys are outside; dude will pick them up and just carry around.

Can't cook to save his life, he kinda set kitchen on fire. And humans cant eat raw meat, so now you are on fruit diet for now (and veggies)

Had this parental instinct to teach them everything, how to shoot, find food, basic self-defence, overall taking good care of themselfs. But he kinda likes that he has to provide for them, it gives him control yknow

When he carries them around everywhere! He acually lets them sit on his shoulders or just hang on his neck😓😍

Cant say no to those cute big eyes! Yes he will let them 'decorate' his armor (with glitter and stickers) and he will let them paint his nails and he will lisen to them gossip about their friends.

If his kid is a little artist and walks up to him and says "papa i drew you!" He does not care that he looks like a lizard nor that they didn't color it perfectly. Dude is purring, picking y/n up and he carries this drawing in pocket everywhere

Other yautjas say that he spoils them, but he disagrees! Your a HUMAN baby, i mean yeah your basically one of yautjas now but!!! Your tiny! And your skin is so squishy!!!

He had to learn how to comb their hair cuz at some point y/n simply refused to cut it (me too lil guy) and he respects them so much he won't just do something against them

Kinda wishes he could understand human body language more

Also about body language i can imagine kid just kinda mimicing yatuja body language and habits. Like dad!yatuja will say "child please go to bed its late" the kid will just angry respond with a hiss👹 "hsssss👽🦎" "?????" If yaujtas had eyebrows, he would rise them

If y/n is a girl, and she has her first period? Dude panics! HUHH WHAT BLOOD??? FROM WHERE!?? UHHHH????

Dude tries to be a perfect father figure, he tries to have similar intrests with his kid so they can connect more, but if y/n is totally not into hunting, collecting, nature themed stuff, Yautja is more than happy to catch up with whatever teens are into this days, but he will judge the hell out of tv shows (if they watch any)

I kinda forgot it suppose to be yandere so it turned out to be just wholesome im so sorry

Understands that kid needs privacy but he will just go invisible mode and lurk in shadows! Like what if somone attacks you??? Or worse! What if you meet some humans that he doenst like??? What if they will tell y/n all lies about what 'bad war crimes' he commited and what 'murderous' his kind is!! Those are lies pls dont lisen to humans

No boy/girlfriends!!! Nuh uh!! Your his little baby you cant go doing all those... things... with some human. ugh! this person probably can't even hunt for you!! Or give you nice treasures!! Or build a pretty nest!! Why would you like them my child?? Look at all those trophies i gathered for all those years! You should stay here!

He loves the fact that he lives in some wild ass jungle and y/n cant leave him due to all those dangers around, plus he loves that y/n will always stay tiny(in comparison obviously) and weak so be basically needs to provide for them! Right???

I used x reader tags ONLY to reach bigger audience

#slasher x reader #slasher headcanons #yandere yautja #yautja headcanon #yautja x reader #yautija #yautja

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incorrect-riordanverse · 1 year

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Riordanverse Characters as quotes by people i know have said

dedicated to @lord-of-pterodactyls, i know you asked for friends in particular but i’m broadening it as even people i consider my nemeses (old ass philosophy teacher) are funny

Percy: i truly feel as if nothing will ever incapsulate my being as truly as the singing monsters water wubbox

Annabeth: *screaming from adjoining room* GET LOST APPLE MUSIC PRIVACY

Piper: *in bikini* i don’t like people with big boobs

Jason: *trying to compliment piper* your hair looks like dementia

Leo: *emerging from the stinky depths of his room after being in there for 16 hours straight and no showers with clothes from 5 days ago, red scabs all over his body and lips so dry it looks like a snake shedding its old skin by how crusty it is* guys on a scale from 1 to 10 how sexy do i look rn?

Hazel: *yeets her foot out and jiggles her toes menacingly at people she dislikes as an intimidation tactic because her toes are particularly hideous*

Frank: *after literally being targeted by a racial ‘joke’* worse than that, you white people eat spam

Grover: *pats air purifier* a good trusted friend

Nico: *drifts into hazel’s room* bro i ain’t even gonna lie, the holidays are better than the black plague *leaves room before she can question him further*

Reyna: *sleeptalking* stallion le meghan

Rachel: *pretending her coloured markers are vapes*

Thalia: *pointing at luke* my bro be the victim and the perpetrator

Tyson: *when talking about doing math* all i have are my fingers and a dream

Clarisse: *sees a sick person in bed* you’re looking pretty vulnerable *proceeds to ransack their room and steal their sheets like some gremlin*

Octavian: i am THE riddler *speaks in riddler voice and puts on devious little expression* what is... a curtain?

Will: *sees a dying person and looks pointedly at nico* and thats because they didnt take their cenovis vitamin c

Luke: i am constantly one snap away from either committing homicide or suicide

Apollo: *feeling face after new skincare routine* gosh my face feels as soft as a silicone tit

Meg: *pointing at apollo after redemption arc* YOU WON’T GO TO HEAVEN BECAUSE YOU ARE A COMMUNIST!

Magnus: *eating falafel* this is an orgasmic experience

Samirah: *substituting random words in english for arabic and not realising no one understands what she’s saying*

Alex: *laughing at the death threats she gets online after posting a meme about BTS in the military*

Blitz: *does something naughty* omg sorry im such a libra（＾ν＾）

Hearth: *walks into room* god is dead.

Carter: *walking into sadie’s room visibly upset with a box of cadbury favourites* here take them. if you don’t im going to eat them all. please, dont make me do this

Sadie: take a shit and be late to school or dont take the shit and be on time hell loop

Zia: my top artist on spotify this year will be xi jinping’s wife

Walt: *simply, appreciatively and completely without context* yeah, buddha is a pretty amazing guy

Anubis: i dislike being emo because i can only go as death note characters for halloween

Bast: *absolutely entranced by watching love island uk and is just repeating everything any person says back in a treacherous essex accent*

Bes: *walking into classroom full of young teens with an oversized ‘free james assange’ shirt* today i am a nice, trendy leftist. tomorrow, who knows?

#of course im putting them in the context of riordanverse or else they simply would not make sense otherwise #i have so much quotes that cant apply to these characters because theyre all asian jokes bc me + my fam + my entire friendship group r asian #i had to censor the frank quote too bc what happened was 100x more out of pocket 💀#riordanverse #incorrect riordanverse #heroes of olympus #the kane chronicles #percy jackson #trials of apollo #magnus chase #annabeth chase #thalia grace #zia rashid #rachel elizabeth dare #piper mclean #leo valdez #nico di angelo #carter kane #sadie kane #jason grace #will solace #samirah al abbas #hazel levesque #lester papadopolous #frank zhang #meg mccaffrey #grover underwood #reyna avila ramirez arellano #bes bast anubis blitz hearthstone apollo octavian tyson #luke castellan walt stone alex fierro clarisse la rue

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hadesisonlyalad · 3 months

Text

yk i dont post a lot on tumblr but we all saw that red flags post so im gonna take a moment of ur time to say something on each merc and the red flags listed for them. im doing a read more incase u havent seen the “mercs red flags” headcanon post and it does not flood ur page

both the medic and engie things with “not wanting to spend time with you/wont make time for you” is SUCH bullshit if that was the case they wouldnt even date you. and then ur telling me engie tf2, DELL CONAGHER, would NEVER want to take you on a date? like ever??? u are INSANE. And then sorry to tackle medic and engie in the same paragraph but they had a lot of common “””””red flags””””” that were listed. why would he yell at you. he hardly even yells in general (based off comics and voice lines) if anything hes just kinda a loud person 💀 AND YOU BRINGING UP ONE THING WONT MAKE HIM SUDDENLY IGNORE YOU FOR DAYS LIKE?? he KNOWS hes committing medical malpractice btw. he would not leave you for bringing that up he is WELL AWARE of what hes doing. and we see him CANONICALLY DISCIPLINE ARCHIMEDES IN MEET THE MEDIC, WHY WOULD HE TOLERATE HIS BIRDS ATTACKING YOU????

also why are we listing an addiction as a “red flag” what the fuck is wrong with you. i get not wanting to date someone with an addiction, its a valid concern, but thats SO much more serious than a “red flag” or “ick”??? LIKE ARE YOU OKAYYYY???????

AND THEN HEAVY’S RED FLAG IS “he has trauma” FUCKING. PACK IT UP GUYS IG IF YOU HAVE TRAUMA YOU CAN NEVER BE IN A RELATIONSHIP. (/s) WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU.

i’m fine with the miss pauling ones, at least two of them, because yeah, it’s canon that she doesn’t have the most time and i imagine if ur not a merc or work in that area a relationship might be a bit hard? but shes an honest person, i don’t think she’s gonna lie to you. idk im very neutral about the pauling ones, if anything theyre the most in character of this shithole list.

all i have to say for pyro is like. yk those people who hc pyro as aroace except theyre super weird about it? like theyre either infantilizing them or have weird ableist feelings about pyro? yeah thats the vibes im getting. actually wait where did u pull codependent pyro from actually wtf

i think the “tryna live like hes 20” thing for spy is really fucking funny 💀 like go girl go live through that middle age crisis!!/j no but seriously. hes dating you hes gonna think you’re a 10, and even then YOU’RE SAYING IF YOU AGE AT ALL HE’LL LEAVE YOU??? CANON MILF LOVER SPY. “OFF TO VISIT YOUR MOTHER!” SPY TF2. WILL LEAVE YOU IF YOU GET OLD AND AGE AT ALL…? HE LIKES HIS WOMEN LIKE HE LIKES HIS WINE MOTHERFUCKER: AGED. sorry bad joke lets keep going uh- i think the other hcs are garbage too i just really hate specifically this spy hc. just this one specifically.

im not a sniper connoisseur, my friend will is way better versed in sniper’s characterization, but even i know this isnt sniper. “thinks if he argues long enough he’ll win”…? “cannot support you in anything”?!!?! “IF YOU’RE HIS FRIEND AND YOU TWO GET INTO A BAD ARGUMENT PREPARE TO NEVER SEE HIM AGAIN” IM GENUINELY AT A LOSS FOR WORDS. I JUST. I DONT..? WHAT DO I EVEN SAY. I DONT K N O W WHAT TO SAY. BUT IF I DID KNOW WHAT TO SAY I’D BE SAYING VERY BAD THINGS.

i dont think scout is misogynistic- i see why people think that but me personally i just think he has no game and people mistake it as violent misogyny for some reason. but. listen we know scout is a dick we do okay but he loves women. why would he cheat on you.? bro he’d be glad u picked him 😭 AND THEN THE PERIOD THING?? he was raised by a SINGLE MOM do you REALLY think shes gonna raise him and let him think that way about a natural body function. im speaking entirely from the single mom experience and the answer is NO!!!! also how is loving your mother a red flag. being the youngest child is also a red flag, i guess. and having issues with his dad. (/s) also, second verse same as the first: IF HES DATING YOU HE THINKS YOU’RE A 10 WHAT IS SO HARD TO FUCKING GET ABOUT THISHXWHBVWBWBXvqvsbs?1?2!2’wndjwke

uhhh soldier wasnt. here for some reason. so nothing to say about him.

anyway leave ur opinions below. i rly dont wanna get into any tumblr drama or internet drama at all bc it scares me dearly and im always self conscious about leaving a bad digital footprint especially over something as petty as tf2 drama but i cannot stand for this slander I CANNOT‼️‼️‼️‼️ sorry if u also think im mischaracterizing anyone here i only put hours of studying into my fav mercs and thats. abt it,, listen im silly okay

#team fortress 2 #tf2 #heavy tf2 #engineer tf2 #scout tf2 #spy tf2 #soldier tf2 #pyro tf2 #demo tf2 #tf2 demoman #ms pauling #sniper tf2 #medic tf2 #guys im going insane #i hate this fucking red flags post im so sorry i had to let it be known #reblog or comment ur opinions ig im also curious

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plantboiart · 2 months

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Hello. List of what animals I believe each just roll with it pc I know would be. I am objectively correct but if you disagree please tell me anyways I crave other people’s opinions to steal.

Riptide

Jay: a bird, obviously. Saying she’s a jaybird is easy and low hanging fruit and extremely valid. Personally I think she’s maybe a corvid since very smart but also absolute fucking menace. Honestly? Could be a seagull. Loud and lives near water and also smart but also? Absolutely insane. Yeah sure I could say she’s something cool like an eagle or whatever but I think in our hearts we all know she’s a seagull.

Gillion: of course he is a sea creature! But what kind? Fish. More specifically? Swordfish. Of course. What else could he be (he could be a shark but shhhh im saving that one for later)

Chip: the bastard man himself! Which animals are the biggest bastards? Raccoons. Yes I am basic. He’s either a raccoon or a little dog. I am specifically thinking my mom’s 11 year old small dog who yells at men and tries to pick a fight with every single dog that is larger than her. That’s some Chip energy right there.

Goobleck: bro who knows like what the hell is that thing i do not. Hes whatever he ate most recently. Bros fursona is just straight up slime. He is an enigma.

Prime defenders (+Ashe I don’t care that technically he was just a guest he deserves to be here)

William: ravens, black cats, bats, butterflies, snakes, crows. All associated with death which makes sense for our little ghost guy! But of course we can’t forget wolves! He has two wolves inside of him after all. But also? He is not cool enough to be a wolf. That man is a black cat with a dream and sharp sharp claws.

Vyncent: I think it would be funny to call him a rat. Since he eats them. And also he just kinda is a rat. But no, I believe he is a deer. Don’t really know why, just….. vibes.

Dakota: my beloved son. He’s a yappy little dog. Bouncing all over the place and screaming at evil-doers. I believe in him.

Ashe: strong cat energy. Is william already a cat? Yes. But so is ashe. He’s like a fully gray cat with short hair :)

Apotheosis

Rumi/Elena: fox! Because Sunny :) also because I can’t really think of an animal that would be a good representation for an identity crisis

Peter: “lizard” no. Peter Sqloint is a mouse. Just a lil guy. I’m right fuck you he. Is. A. Mouse.

Thanatos: spider! Kinda scary and lots of people dont like but in reality just an awesome dude. Shoutout to my friend’s pet spider Mörkö I love them

Blood in the bayou

Rolan: shark!!!! Im right and i need to say it. That man is a fucking shark. I love sharks. Sharks are generally misunderstood as violent and evil but they are just lil guys. Fits Rolan being an evil alien monster but just also a lawyer. (Also i just really like sharks)

Rand: y’all ever cry about pigeons? How we domesticated them and then abandoned them when we didnt need them anymore? How they dont even know how to make proper nests because they didnt need to for so long? Yeah. Im normal about this campaign.

Kian: he’s so hard to figure out because like…….. honestly? In canon? Weve got no fucking clue what his personality is actually like. We dont get a single moment with all the masks off and just the person underneath. The closest we get is him admitting that hes not really a rockstar and even that is so short and just. Auehgeh. This is why im obsessed with him btw i love a mystery i know will never be solved. Also so much room for headcanons. Is he a cat? A butterfly? A dog? A snake? A songbird? A dove? Something else? I dont know!! Lets go with a moth

The suckening

They are all cats. I mean c’mon. Emizel is a feral street cat that hisses at everyone who gets too close. Shilo is an indoor cat with an anxiety disorder. Arthur is their mother. Im correct.

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the-s1lly-corner · 5 months

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I did see that you're getting a bit tired of TADC asks, so feel free to put this on the back burner or ignore it entirely. That said, the TADC cast w/ a reader who has anger issues. (The reader isn't mean or a jerk, they just have emotions that are difficult to control so they can be prone to lashing out.)

TADC cast x reader who has anger issues!

uuhuhuh! this post is mostly just a lot of the characters and the reader communicating and all that because we love a thriving relationship in this house!! so apologies if some of the segments come off as.... repeating.. written as neither romantic or platonic, up to you really

CAINE:

very good at taking you away from the situation thats making you angry; i mean the dude can teleport, so getting you away from somewhere is not an issue for him... however, if you would rather he make up some excuse so its less.. embarrassing..? (this goes for other instances of intense emotion/overstimulation! bro is a king!) he will make up a scenario where youre needed elsewhere so it naturally look like you.... have to be needed... you know? basically a "mom can you say no to this so i can say you said no because i dont want to do this social thing with someone?" energy. or maybe im weird... probably defends himself if you lash out at him, but he wont lash out back. just pushing that hes not the reason youre upset (of course if this is a scenario where hes innocent) he cares about you a lot and he doesnt like seeing you this way, so its likely that hes going to power through it and help you calm down and find a solution... though if you need alone time, youre going to have to tell him as he might not be able to pick up on your body language and hints

POMNI:

probably a little intimated when you get heated about something. should stress that shes not scared of you but you can get a little intense. tries to make a list of things to help you with regulating your emotions... though given that pomni seems to be more of an anxious person rather than an angry on, some of her stuff may not work... maybe? breathing exercises definitely work, as well as detaching yourself from the scene... actually, i think pomni might be pretty solid with calming you down. as for lashing out, i dont think she would be able to stop herself from getting at least a little bit offended, especially if shes just trying to help. please be sure to apologize to her and make it up to her, lashing out at innocent parties isnt okay. hell, lashing out at guilty parties isnt okay too sometimes (this is more of a case by case thing, obviously)

RAGATHA:

very patient but i dont think she would stand for you lashing out at her when shes trying to help. very careful about not pissing you off and stresses communication between the two of you and is able to read when you need some alone time. to the lashing out thing, if you (verbally) attack her for no reason its definitely going to hurt but she knows better than to respond with anger... maybe... really depends on how shes doing and what you said. will either anger you further or make you see youre kind of being an ass to an innocent party, you know?

thinks... pretty good if you need someone to rant or vent to, very open and always offers an ear to you. tries to come up with solutions so you can avoid situations where you become angry, as well as coming up with stress relieving activities to calm you down. 10/10 love ragatha

JAX:

honestly between all the characters hes going to be the one whos going to be pushing your buttons the most. sure he cares about you, but youre not totally immune to his bullshit, you know? like yeah hes less annoying when it comes to you, but he still acts like a douchebag most of the time and pranks you every now and then. i think thats an issue for another post, though, soooooo.... so basically you getting irritated and eventually totally pissed off with jax isnt that rare of an occurrence and since jax isnt the most emotionally mature hes probably going to make a joke of it until he kind of. realizes hes actually causing issues. then he finally drops it and leaves you be. smart enough to know that you need some time to cool off, will at least make an attempt to apologize or make it up to you. probably the worst out of the bunch to have as a partner since he hardly takes shit seriously or with care... this is all coming from someone who enjoys jax, buuuuuuuuuut yk?

KINGER:

honestly the king of comfort, and i think this still applies to non-sadness/anxiety emotions. would be taken aback when you lash out at him? yes, but he will try not to be offended. bros mind is clear when he notices youre so much as slightly upset and hes working on trying to find a solution. takes you to his pillow fort. i dont think he would ask for an apology if you lash out at him unless you say something truly horrible; feels as though you were vulnerable and werent in the right frame of mind... honestly really understanding about it because he cares about you a lot, you know? not much else to be said; tries to dethatch you from the thing thats setting you off, tries to calm you down, and takes verbal lashings with grace.. though i do think some of his patience may chip if its a constant thing. but i think thats a side thing because anyones patience and understanding can only go so far, and ultimately this is an issue the reader themselves is going to have to work on

ZOOBLE:

the most likely to argue back with you if you needlessly lash out at them. zooble takes no bullshit, and if theyre trying to help you and you get onto them for trying to be a good partner/friend then they arent going to be nice about it. like i think they would say some stuff back, before sulking off. this one is definitely going to need to take a lot of time. its not so much that zooble does bad with conflict in the case of "they shut down" its more a "they can possibly instigate it due to them getting caught in their own emotions" soooooo.... you BOTH are going to need to talk about this and smooth it over if you want the relationship to last. communication and shit is key, guys. obviously this can get very heated and drawn out if zooble was innocent and just trying to help, even more so than if zooble was actually the problem. because in that case, then zooble can understand that they did something wrong and at least deserved it a little... but if they actually did nothing and were just trying to help you? no, thats not going to slide with them...

GANGLE:

okay now gangle is the "freezes up and perhaps even flees" when there is conflict, so if you lash out at her shes probably going to get really upset (like sad and feel guilty) even if she knows that she has done nothing wrong and youre upset at something else. not so much as she SUCKS at offering a distraction or means of calming you down, but she.... isnt the best at calming down a really ticked off person.... might just wait for you to cool down... if you said something mean to her please remember to apologize because knowing gangle, shes not going to ask for one out of fear that she might be pushing, or she might outright believe she doesnt deserve one. though i think that might be self projection WHOOPSIE

#tadc x reader #the amazing digital circus x reader #digital circus x reader #caine x reader #pomni x reader #ragatha x reader #jax x reader #kinger x reader #zooble x reader #gangle x reader

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do-i-look-like-a-doctor · 2 months

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okay but the Naruto universe is so fucking weird yet funny if you explain it and question it.

first, you have this lil orphan broke kid ninja boy named after a fishroll. then, you have an emo kid who acts like he got parents and a good way in life despite the fact he’s equally as much of an orphan as Mr. Broke-Blonde-Bitch. THEN you have this normal chick with pink hair who signed up for absolutely none of this nonsense yet got dragged into it. tell me why it’s these three against the world yet none of them can function together? it’s like watching ferrets hyped up on PCP fight over raw spaghetti noodles. dont even get me started when they were in school together, i can bet every person here 6 cents that at some point Sakura aka Ms. Fuckall got tired of Naruto and Sasuke’s bullshit and just tried to abandon them at an animal shelter.

speaking of school and general tomfoolery, why was the dude in charge of these three young squishy brained freaks the most depressed 20 something year old creature on the planet? i will admit, Kakashi is attractive and a great dude. he is so iconic, he misses his old team, and it’s clear he wanted best for his Group of Weird Children but he also reads porn all day and his mask probs smells like cheap aftershave.

if i was a 13 year old ninja child and i saw my sensai (who’s name sounds like cashew) doing all that i’d assume im either about to learn a sick ass skill (how to not cope with emotional trauma properly) or im about to get my ass handed to me. or im about to dropout.

back on track. so you’ve got orphan #1, orphan #2, Ms. Get-Me-Out-Of-Here, and Emotionally Repressed Man in one team. what do the kids do? beef for like 3048384 episodes. what does Kakashi do? try to teach them the power of friendship the entire damn series. oh, and let’s not forget that Naruto apparently has a demon fox inside him because of course he does.

anyways, once the team gets good at teaming they haul off to take their lil ninja exams. who do they meet? some kid named Gaara with smudged eyeliner and shaved brows. he’s a red-head, that’s cute. oh and he can control sand and tries to kill every child in the exams because his dad is a piece of shit hipster. who else do they meet? a kid named Rock Lee who can kick really hard, a girl named Tenten who wishes for all of us to stfu, and poor Neji who can’t keep doing this. there’s also some guy named Guy. yeah, the chunin exams nearly flop because Gaara doesn’t know how to act right.

all this is happening but the pivotal of it all? Sasuke decides to be extra emo and FUCKS OFF TO KILL HIS HALF BLIND SICKLY OLDER TWINK BROTHER.

then, Naruto decides he wants to harness his powers and FUCKS OFF WITH AN OLD ASS BUSHY HAIRED MAN WHO WRITES PORN. Jiraiya needs to be studied on a microscopic spiritual level. he is why SCP’s exist.

who let these kids out? i told you all not to feed the animals and look what happened. now theres beef between a group of kids and the akatsuki.

oh and the akatsuki?? don’t get me started. wtf is that. why is this group of fucked up people with weird powers who are being led by a ginger hive mind of corpses just wandering around? and why is Weasel, aka Itachi, in the middle of it with his goofy explosive hypnotic eyeballs? i want them all put down.

so you’ve got the evil eldirch horrors in the streets. thats fine. Naruto gets put into a new gang cuz Kakashi has to hospitalized. cool, whatever. Naruto decides to start hutning down his rogue boyfriend alongside Sakura, who became a sickass ninja doctor, along with his new sensei Yamato. wonderful… THEN SOME BITCH NAMED SAI SHOWS UP.

DO NOT GET ME STARTED.

what is that? why is it emo? why is its tongue tattooed? put it back outside bro i stg. i love him so much.

everything is just everywhere in this anime bro I can’t. Sasuke is no where to be seen, Naruto is doing fuckall across the world with his groupie, Kakashi is lowkey sad again cuz his kids are gone, and Sakura can barely breathe without issues occurring.

not just that but the twink brother named Weasel is being stupid and enables his own murder. yeah he basically wants Sasuke to come for his ass. meanwhile, Naruto comes home bigger, better, older but still broke and full of fox demon. still, not a single soul except his friends and teachers like him. shit gets even more wild, it becomes knock-off Cheetah Girls vs. The World.

girl i gotta go before i hurt someone. see yall in part 2.

(all of this is heavily unedited, apologies for mistakes)

#naruto #kakashi hatake #sasuke uchiha #itachi uchiha #sakura #yamato #slander #who fed the animals I stg #guys I love this anime plz don’t come for me #yapping #part 2 might be tn or tomorrow idk #uchiha sasuke #uchiha itachi #uchiha obito #hatake kakashi

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random-lil-illing · 9 months

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Call of Duty Ghosts headcanons bc im bored

things these hcs will not have: angst, nsfw, reader/ocs, death (i know ajax died but no he didn't. and logan didn't get kidnapped/taken by the federation wdym)

things that will appear: lots and lots of keegan, a lot of teen! keegan and ajax, logan and hesh, fluff, silliness, lgbtq+ themes, elias, merrick, some rorke, and a tiny bit of neptune and kick. Also riley is there!!! gotta love the dog. also theres swearing. oh and this is a somewhat long post

okay so first up teen keegan and ajax hcs (aka when they first joined the ghosts)

-they lied about their ages for the first few months and then randomly went 'yeah we're actually 16/17'. elias and rorke decided to keep them on the team bc they had potential. merrick was very against it at first but was like 'yeah okay'

-those two definitely confused everyone else with their slang just like hesh and logan do now

-they insisted they were best friends but nobody believed them bc they acted so fruitily with each other (it was all jokes they said)

-if we go with the keegan is trans hc i feel like ajax did a 'diy at home' top surgery

-speaking of the walker bros. keegan was their main babysitter, with ajax as second choice if keegan was unable to. elias paid him like 20-30/hour and gave him an extra thirty dollars if he gave keegan the kiddos before he had time to eat

-keegan was amazing at eyeliner (he still is but tries to convince the rest of the team he doesn't do it anymore. they know better than to believe him) and almost always incorporated it into his eye black for missions

-following this up ajax was the master of painting nails and no one was safe from painted nails until he turned twenty two, including logan and hesh as kids. the only one who was sort of safe was rorke bc ajax never had the patience to convince him

-keegan exclusively wore baggy, graphic t-shirts and sweatpants/jeans/shorts outside of missions. occasionally wore tank tops for training. ajax almost never wore baggy clothes, wearing form fitting clothes instead - tank tops, normal t-shirts, sweatpants, jeans, etc. The two always stole each other's clothes

-keegan had (and has) the absolutely strangest eating habits. cannot eat three full meals a day without complaining about being full, but two meals a day + a bunch of snacks before and after each meal is fine. refuses to eat something he had a bad experience with once in like second grade but will gladly eat something that could kill him. Cannot cook to save his life (can you tell im projecting)

-ajax on the other hand has fairly normal eating habits but could not cook at all back then. he's okay at cooking now, but he till refuses to eat anything raw (including sushi and raw vegetables) or anything too cooked (mushy vegetables and such)

-keegan definitely set curfews for everyone anytime they decided to go out. he wouldn't strictly enfore them but he'd be a bit upset if they weren't followed (he's anxious and cares abt his teammates just doesn't know how to show it)

-i feel like both listened/listen to ayesha erotica atleast a lil. obv they have other music they listen to (metal, rock, etc.) but they definitely have atleast five ayesha songs in their playlists

-keegan has no idea what the p in his name is for. his birth certificate says 'keegan p. russ' (or katherine p. russ if we go with the trans hc). he tried to ask his parents/siblings but they dont know either. ajax always joked its for 'pussy' and logan and hesh followed in ajax's footsteps

-you know those baby tees with like 'i <3 pathetic men' or 'i put the hot in psychotic' on them. yeah ajax and keegan have those but as like oversized shirts

-keegan rarely ever cried/cries bc hes always forcing himself not to. so to encourage him to cry when he feels like it the team gives keegan ten/twenty dollars after everytime he cries and they tell him to 'get himself something sweet to make up for the tears'

-on that note keegan used to have the biggest salty cravings but now he has a terrible sweet tooth. ajax used to like savoury but hes a sucker for spicy now

okay enough teen headcanons lets move on to the present

-we all know logan and hesh are gen z so i propose: the walker brothers confusing everyone with gen z slang/humour/behaviour. things like 'slay' or saying 'im gonna kms' at any minor inconvenience. logan saying 'nice girl dinner' whenever keegan makes his weird but lowkey bomb lazy food

-some of the ghosts (mainly keegan, logan and kick) listen to music on missions. they mainly have appropriate songs for the occasion like phonk or metal but sometimes when they're fighting or killing an enemy inappropriate music starts playing and they have to try so hard not to laugh. i mean keegan slicing someones neck with 'make u cum' by ayesha erotica playing in the background

-logan rarely swears but when he does they are the most brutally creative swears ever. i'm talking 'pussyy-eating son of a French whore' sort of shit, and worse. much worse. hesh swears regularly but gently, elias the same but a bit harsher, rorke swore like a sailor but gentler than logan, neptune only swears when other do, kick never swears (you gotta bribe him to do it), merrick only swears when hesh, logan and keegan can't hear, and keegan swears a lot but nobody ever catches him doing it

-sometimes the ghosts mix their masks up to keep the federation on their toes

-also lets pretend that at the end of the game elias didnt die and logan didnt get captured by rorke and ajax didnt die at the beginning bc that made everyone else sad which makes me sad and just no. no angst here (pls humour me sadness is a very uncomfortable feeling)

-they tried to have separate rooms at their base but eventually they all just moved into the same room minus elias bc they just feel safer that way

-riley is the community service dog no arguing. whenever someones having a panic attack riley helping them. nightmare? dont worry he sleeps in the same as everyone else he'll just cuddle you. trouble eating/doing something? he'll do it with you

-also keegan, kick and logan 100% spoil riley. everyone treats him amazing but these three treat him like a king

-also i think it'd be funny if atleast one of the ghosts kept getting riley's gender wrong and calling him 'she' 'good girl' etc. bc thats exactly what i accidentally keep doing

-riley's very smart but the one thing he doesnt get is why nobody will eat his dog food with him. his logic is that he can eat human food so that means they can eat dog food. the only person that has eaten dog food with riley so far is keegan bc he will eat basically anything as long as the texture/taste/memory with said food is fine

-speaking of which occasionally keegan will just crack an egg and eat it raw infront of the others bc he thinks their reactions are funny. nobody else but neptune and hesh find it funny

-one time kick switched out keegans eyeblack with sharpie ink and keegan couldnt get it off for a week and didnt speak to kick for a month, not even on missions. he had ajax talk for him.

-(over comms on a mission)

kick: hey keegan do you need help?

keegan, fighting for his life against about five enemies alone: ajax tell kick i am about to DIE

-i think it'd be really funny if the ghosts started a tiktok account where they pretended to be airsoft/military cosplayers. theyd get unexpectedly popular and people would be like 'yo wheres ur gear from' and theyd panic and respond with smth like 'we stole it from the government' so theyd just be known as THE anarchist airsoft tiktokers (theyd obviously use different names and masks than usual)

-keegan is the most innocent ghost regarding sexual matters. it was banned talking about/learning about in his house and he never bothered to learn later. he knows the basics (how sex/getting pregnant works) but otherwise no

-merrick, neptune and ajax never had siblings growing up so whenever they see logan and hesh fighting they always wait until either keegan or elias intervene to see if its serious (elias is their dad and keegan grew up with four other siblings). why not kick? kick can't be trusted to intervene if they were tearing each others limbs off bc he and his siblings chased each other with weapons for fun

-keegan loves sugar but doesnt like showing it so he just eats chocolate/ice cream/cake at like two in the morning

-also he moves around a lot in his sleep to the point he could go to sleep on his bed and wake up underneath the same bed like two hours later

-rorke and elias were definitely best friends i refuse to believe they werent. also rorke taught the walker bros how to swear

-the ghosts watch cartoons in their free time. anytime they have a free friday they have movie nights - not limited to cartoons but its mainly that. when they watched the barbie movie they wore pink (also yes they're all feminists no theyre not any -phobic/-ist)

-i know they would never meet him but if they ever met ghost (simon riley) theyd make fun of his accent and maybe mask (especially the 'foap' side profile). they wouldnt take it too far tho i feel like they actually kinda like ghost. he wouldnt like them much tho i feel

-they have game nights and they have rules as to who can play what

-keegan cant play any card games bc he automatically wins everytime or he cheats, no inbetween. hes also banned from twister bc hes the most flexible

-neptune and merrick aren't allowed to play jenga (neptune cheats and merrick always gets way too mad about it). oh and neptune cant play would you rather bc he somehow always is the loser

-logan isnt allowed to play poker or go fish bc he cheats. he also cant play truth or dare bc he always picks truth and never dare

-hesh isn't allowed to play chess because he flips the board. also cant play 'sorry' bc he doesnt like killing off the other players

-kick isnt allowed to play any board game bc he somehow always finds a way to cheat

-elias isnt allowed to play would you rather bc he takes too long to decide

-ajax isnt allowed to play jenga, 'sorry' truth or dare bc hes either cheating or leaving halfway

-merrick also cant play twister bc he cant even do a crab for more than a second. neither can elias but he doesnt want to play anyway

-they have two groupchats - a professional, strictly bussiness one and a free time, silly one. sometimes they'll be talking about a target they have to kill in one groupchat and a minute later theyll be sending memes in the other one. they have the professional chat instead of meeting bc nobody likes those. sometimes someone (usually logan, hesh or kick) will be texting in the casual gc while theyre supposed to be talking abt important stuff in the bussiness gc and merrick or elias will go 'pay attention to the meeting boys' even tho there is no meeting

thats it for now lmk if you want more :]]]

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