#but yknow. this... maybe this thought process... well. it helps me let me exist.

[writing-till-i-am-dead]

Tylo Oneshot

“We’re gonna let you guys hang out in pairs,” said one of the doctors to Tyler. “To let you guys check on each other and all that.”

Tyler scoffed. “How generous of you..” he hissed sarcastically. 

The doctor didn’t bother with a response and left the room, leaving Tyler on his own again. He laid back on his bed and stared at the ceiling. 

Please bring me Taylor.. I need to know if she’s ok.. please, please…

The door creaked open and Tyler jolted up to see his sister. Only.. it wasn’t her. 

“Tyler!” Logan cried out, halfway to tears. 

“Logan!” He exclaimed in surprise before glaring at the doctor. “No! Bring me my sister!!!”

“Ms. Hernandez is currently with Ms. Banner. Complaining will get you nowhere.” The doctor closed the door and Tyler slammed his fist into the wall. “Damnit!”

Logan gave him a look of embarrassment and shame. “I’m.. sorry..”

Tyler looked up at him and suddenly felt guilty. “No, no.. it’s not you, Logan. I just.. Taylor-“

“Is your sister. I understand..” Logan tried to force a smile. He really didn’t understand. He was an only child and was never really close to one specific person..

Tyler sat on the bed and buried his face into his hands. “This place is driving me nuts..”

Logan hesitated before eventually sitting next to him and placing a hand on his shoulder. “Well.. look on the bright side! At least now neither of us are alone!”

Tyler looked up and couldn’t help but feel a little lighter upon seeing Logan’s smile, even if it was a forced one. 

Logan was one of the few people he couldn’t really bring himself to be annoyed with. He’s too nice and the idea of yelling at him felt like it would be the equivalent to kicking a puppy (unlike with Aiden who feels like a mosquito he needs to bash into a wall). 

“Thanks, Logan..” he said with a sigh before lying back. “So what should we do? Not many forms of entertainment here other than the tv. And they’ve only, got, like, 3 channels. The news, Disney Junior, and The History Channel. Unless you wanna watch Ancient Aliens?”

Logan wrinkled his nose at the mention of Ancient Aliens. “Unless you wanna see me pop a blood vessel, I recommend turning on anything but that.”

Tyler was surprised by the almost passive aggressiveness on Logan’s voice. He let out a soft air of amusement and set the remote down. “Fair enough, astrology nerd.”

“Ugh, I study astronomy, not that fake, wishy-washy stuff that only exists to give boring people personalities.”

Tyler barked out a laugh. “Dang, ok! Wasn’t expecting that! Yknow, Taylor believes in astrology. Listens to horoscope podcasts and everything.”

Logan let out a dejected sigh. “Don’t remind me. She once asked for my star sign so she could check my compatibility with everyone in the group. If it was literally anyone else asking me for that, I would’ve stomped off right then and there. But Taylor’s nice to me, so I just gave in..”

“You have a lot more bite to you than I first thought.. guess I don’t hang out with you as much as I should..” 

Logan smiled softly at that. “Aha.. ya, well.. I’m not too fun to hang out with on my own.. but.. maybe..”

The two sit there for a moment, Tyler tapping on his wall dejectedly, wishing he could see his sister..

“I’m sorry..” Logan says under his breath. 

“Huh?” Tyler looked over at him. “For what?”

“Me being the reason you can’t see your sister..”

Tyler sucked in air through his teeth and looked down, ashamed. “Look, Logan, really, I’m not upset they brought you in instead-“

“But it really is my fault.”

“Huh? Whaddya mean?”

“I.. asked them if they could bring me to see you..” he admitted quietly. 

Tyler stared at him, processing his words. All he managed to say was “Huh?”

“I.. I wanted to see you.. because.. this.. this whole thing is terrifying!” There was a pause, all could be heard was the ticking of the clock. “And you.. you’re so confident all the time. For some reason your aggression, even in stressful circumstances, it’s oddly.. comforting? Like, at least there’s one person there who is expressing that they’re feeling anything but fear, yknow??”

Tyler still couldn’t find words. No one had ever described his aggression as comforting. Annoying, yes. A problem, he’s heard that hundreds of times. But comforting? That was new. 

“You..” he finally managed to choke out. “Are weird.”

Shiiiiit. 

Now he wishes he stayed at a loss for words because the absolute look of embarrassment on Logan’s face made him immediately regret his words. 

I KICKED THE PUPPY! SHIT, SHIT, SHIT! I KICKED THE DAMN PUPPY!

“But that’s not bad!” He quickly said. “Whatever helps, yknow!” 

Logan smiled weakly and forced out a laugh. “Ya.. ya..”

“Logan..” Tyler tried again, reaching out hesitantly before stopping himself. “I really didn’t mean it that way..” he said gruffly, really trying to keep the awkwardness out of his voice, but he ended up just sounding stiff. “You’re.. I.. you’re nice, Logan.”

“Hah.. ya.. nice..”

I’m so bad at damage control, ugh!!

“Logan!” Tyler barked. Logan jumped in surprise and turned to him. 

“You’re a fucking weirdo,” he said bluntly. “But I don’t mean it in the way Barron would.. I.. mean it in a good way, all right?”

Logan must’ve realized Tyler meant it, because he smiled a real smile. A smile of thankfulness and appreciation. 

“That.. really does mean a lot..” Logan said, nervously rubbing his arms. 

The two looked at each other and Logan felt desperation creep into his soul. This entire situation has been terrifying, being kidnapped, separated from his friends, and learning he’s going to turn into a phantom. He had to say it. He had to! He couldn’t possibly die without saying it right here and now! He was not going to be a coward!!

“I like you, Tyler,” Logan said. 

Tyler’s eyes widened. “What..?”

“The way you play baseball and have manage to be cool about everything you do and your sense of justice and the way you care about the people you love, like Taylor.. I like all of that about you!”

Right when Tyler thought Logan couldn’t surprise him anymore. “L..Logan..!”

But before he could even figure out what to say, the door opened. “We’ll be taking Mr. Fields back to his room.”

Tyler looked up, his eyes still wide. “Huh..?”

Logan stood up and waved at Tyler. “See ya, Ty..” he said with a smile. Logan felt really proud of himself. 

“W-wait.. hey, Logan!”

But the door shut and Logan let out a sigh. With each step, he remembered little things. Like when he went to a baseball game to practice his photography and he first ever saw Tyler and how cool he thought he was.. Like when Tyler stood up to Barron for Logan… Like how Tyler said he liked that Logan was weird..

By the time Logan reached his room and the door closed, he realized what he did. It really hit him like a school bus. 

“AHHHH! Did I really just do that?!?” He grabbed a pillow and screamed into it. “NOW I REALLY HOPE I BECOME A PHANTOM!”

#school bus graveyard #tyler hernandez #logan fields #Sbg #tylo #tylo sbg #sbg oneshot #Oneshot #Fanfic #shipping #Tyler sbg #logan sbg

[stray-tori]

link click s2e01+02 eng dub thoughts

waiting for my friends to wake up for new link click ep so i'm watching the dubbed episodes and ??? holy, the death flash segment has such a different vibe.

well not SO different but yknow... I do hope they didn't write themselves into a corner here...

Dub: "I'm sorry… everything is going to be different now. death isn't something even one of us can change. the best we can do is accept it, so please don't let this be another burden for you to carry." Sub: "It seems... everything is changing... If death cannot be avoided, then it might be better to face it now."

"don't let this become another burden" ???? ToT

Dub!LG was rly like "dude, speak faster- thERES SO MUCH MORE PAIN YOU CAN FIT IN HERE" dshjds-

Also I find the "even one of us can change" bit to be a little off-throwing. Maybe the emphasis is slightly wrong but I didn't process what he meant immediately upon first hearing it. Sounded more like "ONE of us" than "one of US" (i.e. ability).

alejandro's slight stutter when answering about the ability UGH GOLD

Little sad that the flow of red-eyes conversation isn't as good. usually the dub did great with convo flow, but here it seems a little jumpy. "if you dont know where to start, let's start with activation" -> "I can't quite figure it out" (then proceeds to explain how much they alr figured out adhsjds-)

Also the "i need to trust you again" depends heavily on the viewer knowing what red-eyes means there (i.e. the lie of no cops/the dark room plan).

ik that this is in the sub too, but the "but she sees right through you" is still a little weird to me and it's more obvious in dub i think. I thought that what this was going for was a sort of "you may be okay with fooling me, but fooling her (while i'm her) will end badly" kinda deal, but maybe I was wrong? In the dub it just directly sounds like they mean they were only able to tell the lie because they're in QL's body and get some of her memories and feelings (like CXS does, maybe?) - but they actively paid attention to his shaking hands and everything, so I kind of don't think they relied purely on QL.

nooo they keep making red-eyes slightly different. from them assuming the photos and then confirming it through the "does he run here or teleport" moment, instead they just try... to stab her?? i guess?? and then they go "ohh i get it now" which... isn't a huge difference but kind of takes away from their smart thinking.

Going from the reaction -> "oh so I was right! How interesting!" (sub) to -> "teleporting with pictures, talk about a convenient power!"

STOP!! REMOVING!! THEIR THOUGHT PROCESS >:(

"why would I wanna hurt lu guang? he's family to me!" dub out here confirming the marriage, good for them good for them why would they do this to me

"you said the girl is innocent" -> "from what we saw it wasn't the girl" WHAT ABOUT THE BLOOD ALL OVER HER MADE YOU CONCLUDE THAT

Changing the part where CXS calls the murderer "the person who calls themselves my friend" (paraphrased) was a good call, bc that... sure was A Move.

Damn, dub just implied CXS wanted to perma-dive via "Two years... that is more than enough time. i could go back and change everything.". afaik we still don't know if the 12h restriction is bc of lu guang's rules or actually a restriction, so that is... certainly A Move, too. In Sub I felt like it was just desperate and he might have tried even with the 12h windows, but here it rly does sound like he'd just dive for longer? Unless I'm reading the dialog wrong...

"Sorry to disappoint" LOL ICONIC, slight adjustment but based.

"what's with the stuffed animal? not for me, i guess?" LMAO HELP ME- "it's for my daughter, wise guy." PFFT

"and he's already a ghost. he doesn't even have social media. some might say he doesn't exist" o... okay? does dub know more than we do dshjds-

"Breathe, damn it!!" pfft Captain Xiao is trying-

"is he the streetfighter master siwen talked about?" DUB WHAT ARE YOU DOING- i'm p sure this is just about the style, not the person ahhh-

"our backup's gonna be here soon" - "how funny, mine just arrived" While not what I've seen people translate this line as, still a good flow for this moment.

Aight. Some stumbles imo, but maybe they know more than we do and it'll all work out!

#link click #shiguang dailiren #link click s2 #sgdlr s2 #link click english dub #tori talks #tori has opinions

[xsarcasticwriterx]

Wonderwall- part 9

TSummary: bucky learns of what truly happened the night of Tony's party.

Warning: Angst to all fuck, mild fluff at some parts but pretty much angst

Pairings: Stucky x reader, Tony x reader

Notes: heeeey im back againnn

Masterlist

The world felt as if all time stopped. As if all oxygen had been removed from the plane of existence. You were so far gone you couldn't even process the yelling around you. "y/n!" you finally snapped at the yelling of your name. Bucky stared daggers at you. "what happened when you talked to tony at the party?!" he yelled. you opened your mouth which felt as if someone stuffed cotton in your mouth. "I demanded he tell me why he wouldn't talk to me. He said you'd kill him-" you were cut off. "damn right i am" and bucky launched towards tony, steve being the hero he is jumped straight into action pulling bucky back. "buck! buck! calm down" he said trying to keep bucky back. "you told her not to tell me?!" he yelled at tony. tony shook his head "no i simply said you'd kill me but after that i told her and left i never said she couldn't tell you" tony defended. you shot daggers at tony "I was trying to save you from this!" you yelled at him. "This is only happening because you kept it from me!" bucky snapped at you.

"You said you didn't love her!" bucky yelled at tony "I didn't at the time! At least not that i had addressed i don't know maybe i did, fuck bucky i'm having a child with her!" well shit tony that isn't going to help. "no really?! I thought that my girl had my baby not the asshole who seems to backstab me at any chance!" bucky yelled trying to escape Steve's arms again. "says the one who murdered my fucking parents!" tony yelled back. with that...silence. bucky had stilled until he suddenly shoved steve back causing steve to fall. bucky ran shoving tony to the floor getting a few hits before anyone could process what happened and go to grab him. steve finally pulled him away. shoving him towards steves room blocking him from getting back to tony. "Bucky barnes be a father? he can't even have a conversation without going all winter soldier" tony spat as bucky walked away. everyone looked at tony but you looked at bucky who seemed more hurt than angered. he turned walking with steve more willingly. you turned and slapped tony so hard he fell back to the ground. "yknow what tony. I thought you were better than using someone's past against them. fucking asshole!" you yelled and

started walking to steve's room. before you could you felt a hand on your shoulder. turning you saw vision. "vis not now please" you looked at him. "just....love and jealousy do crazy things. Anger usually comes from hurt remember bucky isn't the only one hurt by this event" he said looking at your stomach talking more about the pregnancy rather than this fight. you nodded "thanks vis" you gave him a small smile before continuing to steve's room. knocking you heard a few sniffles released before the door cracked slightly. steve sighed. "y/n..i don't know if you should be here right now." he said. "steve let me talk to him" you begged. steve looked behind him and then turned back to you with an apologetic look "im sorry, love" he said softly. you nodded "i love you bucky" you said at the floor. "I love you steve" you said at him. he gave a small smile "i love you too y/n and he loves you too just...give him space" he said before closing the door.

you felt tears fall from your face. you headed back to your room before hearing another door open. turning you saw tony who looked like he'd been to hell and back with blood dripping from his nose and cuts on his face along with bruises. "y/n-" he spoke. you shook your head "not yet tony" you started to walk off. you heard an angered breath "y'know this is why i didn't want to fucking tell you!" tony yelled at you. you stopped turning back to him "no this is why you dont be fucking selfish and let your feelings ruin everything" you yelled. "selfish?! selfish?! fuck you for trying to not ruin your life and instead staying away reminder you came into my room last night i was doing fine staying away!" he yelled. "how can you claim to be able to be a father and be around for this pregnancy and for me if you cant handle a fucking team meeting with us?!" you yelled.

"....why were you in his room" bucky asked softly. looking up you saw a disheveled bucky. fuck cant he make noise when he walks?! you make a mental note to make every door squeak so you know when to shut up. "buck-" you started before bucky turned back into the room as steve had started to exit. he looked up at you with a sympathetic look. you closed your eyes taking a breath. looking at tony you simply felt all that anger rush back into you. you stormed off into your room. you flopped on your bed screaming into your pillow.

tears flooded the pillow. you rolled over letting your sobs out. that went as horribly as it could and you in turn lost everyone. well maybe not steve but who knows really. you wanted to scream again and again until your voice was gone. you fell back on your bed staring up at your bed. you knew a place you could escape to. you stood up walking out your room. "where are you going?" you heard steve asked. you couldn't face him. "top of a hill where i can scream" you said honestly. "can i come?" he asked. you finally round to face him. he looked as bad as you. "bucky?" you asked. "fell asleep few minutes ago"

you nodded "and us?" you were afraid of the answer. "y/n i knew tony loved you long before he even knew. the second word was out you were pregnant i knew that he couldn't stop himself from falling hell he probably started falling after you two...y'know" he said looking at the floor. "point is, I would never leave you because of how he feels and while i have questions i know you'd never cheat...well...y'know what i mean." he said awkwardly. you nodded. "steve" you said softly. he looked up at you. "thank you." you said walking to him and hugging him. he gave a light laugh "no need to thank me, love. Now let's get out of here" he said squeezing you before letting you go. You two got into the car music softly playing in the back as steve drove. Yall remained in silence with so many questions and words left unsaid. You could feel the tension, so thick you could cut it with a knife, and yet you did nothing but remain silent on the ride except to direct steve on where to go. Soon you saw the thick forest full of trees of various kinds. as steve drove up the hill you saw the field of flowers approaching. steve parked the car and looked over at you. you looked at steve and sighed opening your mouth ready to speak steve cut you off. "we'll talk later" he said getting out of the car. you nodded and exited the car. you walked to the edge of the hill, looking out at the long field of flowers flowing down the slope. you inhaled deeply thinking of the last few months of your life, hell the last few hours of your life. you thought of how you almost died how you were stranded out in space accepting you'd never see any of your friends again and now you were here, pregnant with tony's kids and bucky angry at you and not even talking to tony and steve has so many questions that you can feel him pondering what exactly your keeping from him and bucky. you feel anger souring through you.

How could you have almost died and yet somehow everyone still blames you for something you thought would never occur blames you as if you even thought you would live to see them again, blames you asking you what you were thinking when the truth was you weren't thinking because you thought you were as good as dead. why is this the way things went. you felt your lungs fill with air and your fist curl up. you scream louder than you ever have. you feel energy sour through you feeling the air shift and hearing the trees behind you creaking. "uhm y/n?" you hear steve. you feel tears stream down your face and your throat tighten. you gasp for air as you fall to your knees. you hear steve running to you. "y/n" he says putting a hand on your shoulder as he kneels next to you. you look up at him and see the concern on his face. you look around seeing branches have fallen from the trees and flowers have broken. you hear car sirens going off. "i'm sorry" you whisper. steve wipes your tears "its ok" he says holding you. "It's all ok" he says stroking your cheek of your still falling tears. "I never meant for any of this" you choke out. "I know, I know, everyone just needs time" steve's voice remains soft and gentle. silence soon falls and again you can feel steve's brain spiraling. "ask me" you whisper. "hm?" steve hums. "ask me whatever it is just ask" you say pulling out of Steve's grip. "No-" you cut steve off "ask. ask and get it done with" you say.

"Why didn't you tell me?" He asked softly. "I didn't want you to have to lie to bucky" you say stroking Steve's cheek. "but I could've helped you tell bucky" he said. "I know, but i need to handle this myself at some point and i thought i could know until..." you trail off. steve nods "give bucky time he will come around and tony....that's up to you" he shrugs. your not sure where you stand with tony but what you do know is you will never deprive your kid of a father and if tony and can still be that than who are you to stop it not matter what your personal feelings to him may be. you sigh and look at steve "thank you" you say. steve smiles "no need to thank me" he says kissing your forehead. "how'd you find this place?" he ask. "When the memories got bad and fury was pushing too much id go on a walk, one day i found this place it was peaceful and once i had broken down here and realized no one could hear me and my powers could spiral here and break things without hurting anyone it just became my area for a good bit." you said finally being able to think properly.

steve hummed and held you simply sitting in what was now a peaceful silence. soon time got to you two and you knew you must go. "come on,love" steve said slowly standing. you sighed following after. the car ride steve held your hand and the silence was no longer filled with unanswered questions and betrayel. you sat in the car outside the avengers building feeling anxiety fill you. steve could feel your grip on his hand tighten. "love?" he asked rubbing yout hand. "They all hate me" you whispered. "no they dont bucky is upset and tony is well tony but everyone knows you and knows you would never purposely hurt anyone and that bucky is simply feeling betrayed." steve said softly. you nodded. you released steves hand exiting the car. you walked into the building a silent empty house as everyone was hiding away from any argument that may arise. sighing you walked to steves room.

peaking in you saw bucky still asleep curled into steves pillow. you walked closer seeing his hair a mess and his body seemed so tired. you brushed his hair out of his face sitting by him on the bed. you heard footsteps looking up to see steve. he gave you a soft smile before walking off. you felt tears fall again. you felt horrible for what you did to the man you love. He has been through hell and back and been alive for far longer than he probably even wishes and now you've only hurt him more. You have tried to help him process his past and yet you've caused him so much pain in these past few months you haven't even stopped to think how he may feel about having to raise someone else's son, only concerned if tony would raise his own kid as if you didn't two of the best men in the world right in front of you handing themselves to you. you pushed his hair out of his face. you sae bucky start to stir and stood up. sighing, you nodded and left the room. You walked to your room and laid on your bed feeling your tears stream down your face. You needed to fix this. Need to fix your relationships with those in your life. Need to fix all of it. That's what you would do.

Taglist (yea my bad y'all waited months again)

@solielsfanfics @vicmc624 @mylifeispainandiloveit @frostay @cjand10

#bucky x reader #mcu #mcu fanfiction #mcu x reader #marvel cinematic universe #marvel #tony stark x reader #bucky barnes #bucky barnes fanfiction #bucky barnes x reader #bucky #bucky barnes fluff #bucky barnes x you #bucky fanfic #bucky x you #james bucky barnes #james buchanan barnes #stucky x reader #stucky #steve and bucky #steve x bucky #steve rogers #winter soldier #iron man x reader #iron man #the winter solider x reader #winter solider x reader #the winter solider #captain america x reader #captain america

[caught-the-lovebug]

hi!

so I have this really really weird situation with my sort-of crush right now.

We both know each other for around a 3 months or so, and i feel we're pretty close friends but im not sure he feels we're THAT close yet, but we still talk sort of often.

we were pretty good friends, and we'd constantly roast each other, make fun... very play-fight type of friends.

so, i honestly just thought of him as a friend for quite a while, but there was this contantly lingering but unidentifiable feeling everytime i'd talk with him. I just brushed it off, because - well, I don't trust chemical reactions.

but then this one day i just realized that - i feel some sort of affection for him. whenever he smiled, laughed at my jokes, responded wittily, made eye contact with me, I'd feel so happy and feel the need to squish his face (haha im so cringey T_T)

and then i was like "okay, this is some kind of romantic affection, definitely" which was weird for me, because I'm ace and I've only ever had one other crush in my entire lifetime, and that was feeling was veeryy different. this was smthing weird, like - i just wanted to protect him at all costs, yknow? that kinda thing, but it wasnt very sibling-y either.

i told a few of my friends abt this while the crush grew, and i tried to interact more, but then this one day I tried talking with him and i figured that someone who knew told him that I liked him and after that, he started acting really distant with me, which I hated, because even if I did like him, I considered him to be a great friend, and I didn't want to lose that friendship. We texted fine, but irl, we barely spoke.

later on, i learnt that he likes another girl and doesn't like me romantically, but doesnt mind being friends with me. After that, I found the whole process of "making him like me" so tiring and gave up on my crush, which was surprisingly exhilarating.

currently, I've convinced him I just want to be friends and I did that to myself as well so now I don't feel any pressure or anxiety when talking with him and I just act as myself (which is so relaxing compared to when I was constantly overthinking everything i did around him). I like the relationship we have as friends but I do still sometimes wish for more.

I like not crushing on him consciously because i can be myself, but at the same time, i catch myself thinking about him or just giggling over how adorable he is or glancing at him whenever I see him.

I'm a little confused as to what we are right now, and more importantly what I'm feeling for him, and idk if maybe I might have a chance with him in the future? should I still make tiny attempts of flirting or trying to impress him or should I just let it be and go on its own course?

(i dont even know what point I'm trying to make here - I just needed to vent T_T)

Just needing to vent is so valid.

I'll attempt to answer your questions still but if the vent is all you needed, then feel free to ignore me lol

It seems to me that you are friends. That doesn't change if someone is crushing on the other. Friendship is separate to romance, they exist side by side. You are friends and you have romantic feelings for him. That's okay.

Getting caught up in what feelings mean and what words to use, I often find isn't helpful. I had a crush on my best friend for four years. It didn't stop us being friends but our friendship felt closer and different to others I'd experienced. When I would get frustrated trying to label how it was more than just best friends but not dating because he didn't feel romantically back, it felt awful. The reality is, words are flawed. Capturing our entire complex history and my emotions for him in one word wasn't going to be possible.

And this can be true for newer crushes on friends too.

In regards to a chance in the future, you might! But equally, you might not. It's okay to have your feelings and not force them away if you don't want to. In my experience, crushes on friends are difficult to force away. But I would let it fade when it does. Clearly, he doesn't want to lead you on, so holding onto hope isn't going to help your friendship.

And on that same topic, I don't think you should try attempts at flirting. You've both decided to be friends and not pursue romance with each other right now, I wouldn't push that.

In saying that, having a crush can be fun and exciting, and you're allowed to exist in those feelings and enjoy them. If you don't like them, that's valid too! But you don't have to be ashamed of them and you don't have to force them away if you don't want to.

I hope this helps!

#crush #fox gives advice #anon ask #ace

[eternally-writing]

chain reaction | jjk

genre: fluff and angst

rating: PG

pairing: Jungkook x reader

theme: college!au , enemies to lovers, series

word count: 1.3k

warnings: light swearing

synopsis: A semester with your mortal enemy, Jeon Jungkook, as your lab partner was bound to be an experience to remember.

banner by me!

A/N: hey everyone! This is my first series that I’m writing and I’m so excited to share it with all of you! If you want to be tagged in future parts, reblog and mention that you want to be tagged in the caption, or you can send me an ask!

--♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡--

“You’re late”

Swinging your backpack onto the lab bench beside you, you glare at your lab partner.

“Shut up Jeon, it’s only 8:04am and our TA hasn’t even finished introducing the lab yet”.

Introduction to Organic Chemistry was all set up to be your favorite class. You were a chemistry genius in high school, your professor had amazing “rate my professor” reviews, and the class fit perfectly into your schedule, finishing right at 2:00pm so you could walk back to your dorm under the radiance of the afternoon sun.

It was all going well until you walked into your 8:00AM lab and found that due to budget cuts, all labs would now be done in pairs. And you had been paired with none other than the bane of your existence, Jeon Jungkook. As if doing an amide reduction wasn’t hard enough on its own, you had to do it alongside the biggest thorn in your side.

You couldn’t quite pinpoint exactly what it was about him that irked you so much. Maybe it was the way the girls tried to flirt with his constantly over the open flame of a Bunsen burner, or the way that he sucks up to your extremely old TA in order to get full marks on his procedural skills, or maybe it’s the fact that he somehow managed to look effortlessly put together at 8am on a Tuesday morning, while you looked (and felt) like absolute crap.

Either way, you were counting down the seconds until this semester would be over and you wouldn’t have to look at Jeon Jungkook again, but time seemed to be moving extra slow today.

“Late and spacing out today? Wow, lucky me to have you as a lab partner.”

Scoffing at him, you adjusted your protective glasses and readied your labware for today.

“180 minutes until I’m free. That’s it,” you thought to yourself.

“Technically it’s 170 minutes now, but if we don’t get started someone soon so we can hand in our product by 11am, we’re going to be here for a lot longer than that.”, snapped Jungkook next to you, already starting to mix chemicals together in a beaker.

Well, looks like your habit of accidentally saying things out loud gets worse when you’re tired.

“Let’s just try and get through this lab today without stepping on each other’s toes Jeon, okay?” you said, trying to catch up to Jungkook in the lab.

There was one part of chemistry labs you disliked the most. The waiting time. In some labs it was only 30 minutes, while in other labs it had taken almost an hour, but the constant in all of the situations was that waiting made it feel like time was passing at an infinitely slower rate. Taking out your laptop would violate lab safety protocol, and you couldn’t do any further steps in your lab until your reaction in your solution was done progressing under the fume hood. Since there were no other options, the only other thing left to do in moments like this was talk to Jeon Jungkook.

“So I was -”

“What did you -”

Yikes, add the awkwardness of starting conversation with Jeon Jungkook to the reasons you never talk to him.  You decided to pause and let him carry on with whatever he was saying, giving him a semi-pleasant smile to hopefully help distract from the embarrassment you were feeling.

“I was going to ask what you wanted to do our lab presentation on,” said Jungkook.

Your eyes widened at his statement. Looking at the whiteboard situated at the side of the room, you saw that in the 4 minutes you were late to your lab you may not have missed your TA explaining the procedure, but you did the big words on the board that said:

“FINAL LAB PRESENTATION: 3 weeks from now, worth 20% of your grade, done with your lab. 5-10 page paper and 10-15 minute oral presentation”.

Unable to contain your discontentment with the situation, you let out a groan and leaned back in your chair in frustration, almost falling off your lab stool in the process.

“Well aren’t you just little Miss Sunshine today? I’m not thrilled about this either, but I’d rather pull out my eyelashes than have to repeat this course again next semester,” scoffed Jungkook.

No morning ice coffee + Jeon Jungkook being annoying + a looming group project was more enough to make your head hurt.

“Can we just talk about this later Jeon? My brain can’t process this right now,” you pleaded as you put your head in your hands.

Leaning closer to you, Jungkook spoke at a whisper-level near your ear so nobody else would hear.

“Is your brain too busy processing my charm, sunshine? Don’t worry, I’ll try and tone down the charisma for you,” he joked with a smirk.

Your head went from being in your hands to plopping flat onto your (no longer sterile) lab counter at Jungkook’s comment.

First of all, ew. You don’t know how Jungkook was possibly picking up girls by talking like that. Second of all, charm and charisma were probably two words that you would NEVER associate with Jungkook, so his statement was definitely wrong.

A project with Jungkook meant that you would be spending a LOT more time with him, and the prospect of that happening made you wince internally. Group projects meant libraries, evenings, and , ugh, probably weekends with Jeon Jungkook.

You were snapped out of your internal despair by the sound of Jungkook’s voice.

“Hand me your phone.”

You froze. “Hm?”

“Well I don’t know what you think of me Y/N, but unless you think I can read your mind we’re  going to need to text to figure out when to meet.”

Giving in, you quickly tossed your phone into his open palm while grabbing his phone which was sitting on top of his backpack.

Glancing over his shoulder, you took a peek at your contact name.

“little miss sunshine? really Jeon?”

“Of course sunshine, i had to pick a name that encapsulated your positive and radiant energy,” he retorted, sarcasm practically dripping off of his words.

You definitely were picking your battles today, and one over a silly contact name didn’t seem to be worth it.

“You can do whatever, Jeon, but you’re sticking in my phone as “Jeon Boy” and there’s nothing you can do about it.”

“We’ll see about that Y/N,” remarked Jungkook as he opened up his lab manual to read the next steps in the procedure.

Your mom had always taught you that the word “hate” was a very strong word and was only to be used in extreme situations. To this day, there were only 3 people in your life that you truly hated in every sense of the word: your ex-boyfriend, Jimin, your ENGL 101 Professor, Dr.Lee, and your neighbor’s cat, Mr. Whiskers, who chewed up your grade 8 science project the day before it was due.

You wouldn’t say that you hate Jungkook, but you were definitely getting close.

“Yknow, I don’t like you Jeon. Actually, scratch that, I really don’t like you.”

Glancing over at the timer on your lab bench finally reaching 0:00, Jungkook began walking over to the fume hood. Turning back to you, he smirked and started to speak.

“Well, the feeling’s mutual sunshine.”

Boy, this was definitely going to be a long semester.

--♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡--

If you want to be tagged in future parts, reblog and mention that you want to be tagged in the caption (or you can send me an ask)!

If you liked what you read, please write/follow! Thank you for reading♡

- Emily

#bts fic #jungkook fic #armywriterssupport #bts #bangtan boys #jungkook fluff #jungkook angst #bts fluff #bts angst #bts series #kpop fic #enemies to lovers #themes: e2l #bts e2l #e2l #bangtan sonyeondan #bts x reader #jungkook x reader #jungkook x you #bts x you #college au #bts college au #jungkook college au #bts imagine #jungkook imagine #kpop imagine #kpop scenario #bts scenario #jungkook scenario

[clumsyclifford]

ok hello i absolutely love all ur fics, you’ve just got a certain quality in ur writing that is just… mmm. yeah so anyway, do you have any advice on how to improve or just how to write?? (especially fic cause personally i struggle with that more than original stuff??)

hello!! that is very kind of you to say thank you <3

advice on how to write. oh boy. oh man. well i can try. i will do my best. i will also try to be brief but we all know how that song goes

update from having finished answering this: alright. okay. this is not only long, but decidedly english teacher-y. i’m sorry that i am the way that i am. this is what you get for asking a leo for writing advice. am i joking? maybe. maybe not. anyway. this post got away from me in a big way so here’s a read more. warning: LONG post under the cut.

1. study your characters. for RPF like the band stuff i write, that literally means watching interviews, watching them perform, seeing how they interact with each other, picking up on their mannerisms (behavior) - what they do with their hands, if they repeat themselves or stutter when they talk, the quality of their voice when they're talking about different things, and so on. also keep track of things they mention a lot in interviews especially about each other - for example jack has mentioned before that alex has an annoying habit of twirling his hair when he zones out. that kind of thing. IMPORTANT NOTE!: you don’t have to use all of this information. just like studying for anything, you collect all the information you can and then you parse through it and use whatever you think will contribute or be relevant to your story.

2. remember that characters are people. or at least they’re representing people, which is an important distinction (see #3). still, considering that your characters are people can be a helpful way to get out of your head. see, characters are supposed to be archetypical, and fulfill a role, and say certain things in certain ways and never really deviate from that. but people are highly unpredictable and behave in random ways for random reasons and have thought processes that are unfathomable. people will just do fuckin’ whatever. if you’re worried that your characters aren’t behaving in a believable way, keep in mind that you’re trying to make your characters represent people, and people’s behavior is justifiable any number of ways. people just do shit.

3. remember that characters are not people. sike! no but seriously, this is just as important to remember. unfortunately, no matter how hard you try, characters are never going to be people. that’s a good thing for stories, though. characters can pick up on nuance in senses that people can’t - they can distinguish between different facial expressions, different smells, different sounds - BUT ONLY INSOFAR AS IT MOVES THE STORY ALONG. in other ways, characters are ridiculously oblivious. you can use this to your advantage. in fact, a lot of the time, you have to. if your character notices right away that someone is flirting with him, then you can’t write a 30k slow burn, for example. characters don’t do that thing humans do where they go “what?” but then halfway through the re-explanation they register what’s been said. pretty much everything characters say has meaning. (by this i don’t mean semantic meaning, i mean significance - characters don’t really just say “what?” because they didn’t hear what someone said, they say “what?” because they can’t believe it or they don’t understand it or they refuse to understand it. characters never seem to run into the didn’t-hear-them problem. must be nice.)

characters can do whatever you want or need them to do, because you’re in charge of them. (sometimes this doesn’t feel true - mine do all kinds of shit and i just have go “well alright then” - but it is true.) they are gears in a story. you decide when and how they turn.

4. dialogue is your friend. i am super super biased here, because i looove writing dialogue. if you talk to sam about this i’m sure she would say that description and narration are the ways to go. but you came to me, so i get to say that dialogue is god. i don’t want to say that dialogue is the only method of communication (i know nonverbal communication is real), but dialogue is the fastest and most effective method of communication, and by extension, the most effective way to advance relationships between characters. now. obviously there are exceptions. if characters are kissing, they’re probably not doing a lot of talking. if they’re trying to be undercover or discreet, they’re more likely to rely on gestures and facial expressions than speaking. if you’re writing a very peaceful scene, you might not want to undercut it by adding a lot of chit-chat. but i maintain that dialogue is the best way to move a story along, for a few reasons. 

first, at least for me, too much description is just tiring. depending on how skillful the writer is (sam), i can read a fair amount before i hit my limit, but unlike in mean girls, the limit DOES exist. you don’t want to over-describe the world (see #5). second, i find that dialogue is a really really good indicator of a person’s character. this is especially true and relevant in fanfiction, which is a lot more character-driven than original fiction in many ways. also, in a sec i’m gonna talk about showing [not/and] telling, which is every english teacher’s bitch, but dialogue is a really good way of showing who a person is and also a good way to establish facts about the universe. you could just narrate and be like “Jack hated waking up early,” and that works and in many cases it’s perfectly legit. but you could also do something like this:

“What the fuck,” Jack mumbled, still half asleep. “You better have a really fucking good reason to be waking me up this early. Like someone better have fucking died.”

and sometimes that’s just a more fun way to say it. (for the record you can also show AND tell here! there’s no reason why you can’t have this line of dialogue and then a line in the narration confirming how very much jack is not a morning person!)

the last reason why i am particularly fond of dialogue is because i am also particularly fond of communication, which is a preference thing. let’s face it, guys: characters aren’t gonna communicate if they’re not literally actually talking to each other. dialogue means talking to each other. talking to each other means solving problems, fixing (or creating) conflicts, understanding each other better. i love communication, ergo, i love dialogue. And You Should Too. 

5. describe the world, but don’t over-describe. i opened this fic earlier and it was like “jack was excited to wake up to go to his first class at the university of baltimore” and i just. i was like is this really relevant. do i really need to know this. and i never found out because i closed the fic but in my defense it was on wattpad and i had only opened it out of curiosity. look. there are three ways to use details in fic. (a) introduce them right away (b) introduce them when they become relevant or (c) don’t introduce them at all. let me give you some examples. 

(a) say your character A (i’m using jack because i’m used to him) wakes up. he’s in his room in his house off-campus. character B (rian) walks into the room. this might be a good time to explain that rian is his housemate. to that point: “show not tell” is a good rule, but sometimes “show and tell” is just as good. e.g.: 

Rian walks in, holding Jack’s Green Day shirt and looking irritated. That’s really nothing new; Rian looks irritated at Jack roughly once a day. Being housemates for a year will do that to a friendship.

boom, now you’ve let everyone know they live together without throwing it in their face, and you’ve also told everyone that these two guys are friends and have been friends for at least a year but probably longer. you showed it by having rian walking in holding jack’s shirt - usual housemate behavior - but you also told it in a subtle way that established the relationship and some kind of history between these two. well done.

(b) sometimes you want a certain detail to make an impact. this is the kind of thing you hold onto and don’t specify, and in certain cases you leave the reader wondering, “well what about x?” and then when you finally explain x they go ohhhhhhhhhh. yknow. the italicized oh. consider the following:

(A)

“Alex is in my bio class,” Rian says, referring to Jack’s ex-boyfriend of last year.

Jack frowns. “So? Why should I care?”

“He’s my lab partner,” Rian says. “I have to spend a lot of time with him.”

“I don’t care what you and Alex do,” Jack says. “But you should know he sucks at bio.”

Rian gives Jack a look. “First of all, that’s not true, he’s incredibly smart. And second, I’m telling you as a courtesy, because I thought you might not want your ex-boyfriend hanging around our house after he broke your fucking heart.”

(B)

“Alex is in my bio class,” Rian says.

Jack frowns. “So? Why should I care?”

“He’s my lab partner,” Rian says. “I have to spend a lot of time with him.”

“I don’t care what you and Alex do,” Jack says. “But you should know he sucks at bio.”

Rian gives Jack a look. “First of all, that’s not true, he’s incredibly smart. And second, I’m telling you as a courtesy, because I thought you might not want your ex-boyfriend hanging around our house after he broke your fucking heart.”

the only difference between these two excerpts (which i just wrote lol they’re not from anything real) is that the second one doesn’t explain who alex is right away. that makes it way more interesting when rian reveals who alex is a few lines later. magic.

(c) take this college au that we’ve established here. where does it take place, you ask? easy answer: it doesn’t matter. you don’t need to say what school they’re at. this will make your job easier, because then no one can fact check you, and it also means you don’t have to decide what school they’re at. but even if you do decide, it’s not usually necessary to say. believe me, you can go thousands of words without ever needing to specify what school they’re at. you know why? because it doesn’t matter. and no one cares. and as soon as you specify in canon that they’re at a particular school, you are bound to be accurate to everything that school does, and that makes your job way more difficult than it needs to be. as hazel once said, work smarter, not harder. 

6. adverbs are also your friend. (yknow, words that describe verbs, typically ending in -ly, like “loudly” or “angrily” or “smoothly”.) ESPECIALLY when it comes to dialogue tags. (dialogue tags are the things you add to dialogue to say who’s talking and how they’re talking - like “he said” or “he whispered” or “he earnestly explained” or whatever). a lot of the writing advice you’ll see nowadays will usually guide you away from overusing dialogue tags other than the classic “says/said” and i STRONGLY concur with that advice. things like yelled, cried, mumbled, snapped - these are very good in moderation, when you’re really trying to emphasize the way a person is speaking. the more you use them, the less impact they have. in most cases, a simple “he said [adverb]” will do. instead of “he snapped” consider “he said curtly/sharply/coldly.” instead of “he mumbled” consider “he said quietly/clumsily/softly.” I WANT TO MAKE IT CLEAR THAT THESE ARE NOT DIRECT SYNONYMS. every word has a nuanced and slightly different meaning and that is the BEAUTY of the english language!!!! all i’m saying is that in many cases, a verb can be replaced with an adverb to achieve roughly the same effect, without making the reader feel like they’re scanning a thesaurus.

and speaking of a thesaurus: it’s not cheating to use outside resources like thesaurus.com to help you come up with words. i fuckin love thesaurus.com. i use that shit all the time for everything. i use it when i’m writing emails. i used it just now to write that last paragraph. thesaurus.com is your BEST friend.

7. grammar. (and spelling but that’s really a given.) unfortunately if i tried to teach you all of the essential rules of grammar this post would exceed tumblr’s previously-nonexistent word count limit. so i’m not gonna teach you any of them. this is just a general point to suggest that if/when you’re writing, have someone you trust, with a good grasp of grammar, look over it. of course it doesn’t have to be perfect or AP style or anything like that. readers will overlook a certain amount of grammar mistakes and every reader has a different threshold. but in general, as a grammar geek and former journalism editor-in-chief, i have a duty to my grammurai code to preach the importance of grammar in writing. good grammar does not necessarily mean good writing and vice versa, bad grammar does not necessarily mean bad writing, but bad grammar makes good writing a lot harder to read, and in some cases will even obscure your actual meaning. so please, have someone read it. for the record this is me offering up my services. i am very good at fixing grammar. i have lots of weaknesses in writing but grammar is one of my strengths. please prioritize grammar. thank you for coming to my ted talk.

***

okay so now that i’ve said all of this shit and pretended to be an expert and embodied everyone’s tenth grade english teacher, let me add one very important disclaimer:

none of this is always relevant.* writing is an art, not a science. you are never going to be following all of the rules, all of the time. you shouldn’t. it’s good to know the basics of constructing a plot, establishing a character, showing and/not telling, moving the story along. but a lot of this advice is really subjective and heavily influenced by my writing experience and habits and tendencies and preferences, and those are simply not generalizable to the world. i am a sample size of one and science dictates that that means my results cannot be statistically significant. i am just some guy. earlier i said you don’t want to over-describe the world. but maybe you do! maybe you’re really into worldbuilding and you want people to know what they’re getting into. maybe you’re like sam, and you just don’t feel as confident in your dialogue skills but you love painting word pictures. i said that adverbs are your friend, but maybe you just prefer to use verbs. maybe you don’t want ANY dialogue tags and you want the reader to interpret the dialogue based on context and content. i said that characters aren’t people and they won’t behave like people, but maybe you’re trying to write hyper-realistic characters. maybe you’re just going for believability over narrative. WHATEVER. the point is, rules are made to be broken. no one is going to have The Answer for How To Write Good because there isn’t just one answer. every single writing rule has exceptions and you can be that exception as many times as you want.

*except grammar. grammar is fucking always relevant.

i hope any of this advice was helpful to you, even though i english teacher-ed the fuck out of it. and for what it’s worth, i approached this as if you were a relatively novice writer, but i know absolutely jack shit about your writing prowess and experience and habits. so maybe you already know all of this and none of what i’ve said is helpful at all. if you have a more specific problem, i would be happy to try and help. if you’re hoping for more specific feedback, i’d have to read something of yours first - but again, happy to try and help. i don’t know if you can tell but i loooove writing and english and grammar and all of this shit and it would be my honor. i have now spoken so long that james madison himself is begging me to shut up so i’ll stop here but thank you for coming by and giving me the opportunity to expatiate a shit ton. and GOOD LUCK i forgot the most important advice of writing which is HAVE FUN LOVE WHAT YOU WRITE AND WRITE WHAT YOU LOVE OKAY BYE

#yowza #mamma mia #hachi machi #someone get this bitch a muzzle #i feel like i keep saying i sound like an english teacher here but i never specify that im not actually an english teacher #god i wish my blog brand was just 'the person you come to with writing questions' #is it too late to establish myself as that #ask #writing advice #stuff #im giving it the stuff tag. i said enough that i feel like it's earned the stuff tag. #anonymous #if i keep looking at this im just going to keep adding things because adhd-coded brain wants ME to overdescribe. hypocrite #so im just gonna hit post n run #good luck

[kevinwastaken]

okay so idk if anyones done this yet, but this has been in my mind ever since i got into omori lmao

so uhHhHhhh heres my idea for an identity v omori crossover! just because i think it would be neat

this is going to be a super long post (probably), so if you want to read it, just hit read more or whatever

i also want to say that some character choices are gonna be taken from my friend, @/kami.rikki on instagram. but she didnt think as hard on these as i did so like idk

there Will be spoilers for omori, so just be warned of that lmao

so as i said before, this has been on my mind for a HOT minute. and i think it would be a cool collab

for starters, this crossover will be split up (as is every other crossover) in two parts, with one hunter two survivors. i know essence usually have one hunter three survivors, but theres not enough characters for that, and six can be split up evenly sooo

i was thinking that the skins could be like the ones from the persona 5 crossover. like, they can be “awakened” in a sense. the base costumes will be the dream world versions of everyone, while the awakened costumes will be the real world versions. i wasnt here for the persona 5 crossover, so idk how many of those spirit things you had to collect, but i Do know that omoris spirit things could be. uh

well actually i dont know. initially i was thinking lightbulbs, like the one in white space, but the lightbulb isnt too important in the game i dont think? and im not sure about clams either. i know theyre dream world currency, but??

oh actually, maybe you can collect Something to awaken the costumes. because something is a representation of the truth in sunnys mind, and by awakening the costumes, you get to see the characters as their real selves. yeah lets go with that, you collect something from the essence

i swear ive been thinking this out shut up

the hunter costumes wont be awakened though, and i have a reason for this

anyway

part one

the characters that will be present in part one are sunny, basil, and aubrey. i chose them first because. ofc, sunnys the protag, basils his best friend and helped cover up maris death hes important to the story but anyway, and aubrey is <<33 yuh

so heres whos going to be who:

sunny/omori as wu chang

so let me preface this by saying that im not a hunter main. never have been, never will be. and ive never played wu chang. but i swear thisll make sense, im doing research

wu chang is actually composed of two characters, with two different stats: xie, the white guard, and fan, the black guard. i cant tell the difference while im playing, considering the fact that my ass is either running away or decoding. but theres a difference i looked it up

sunny would be the white guard. xie is a fast chaser, but has slow attack speed. ie, slow hits, slow pallet breaking, that stuff. this reflects how sunny is in the real world. he can run, yes, but hes still physically weak due to being locked in his house for four years and spending all his time sleeping. he would be better for chasing than attacking

omori would be the black guard. fan is the opposite of xie, having slow chasing speed but faster attack speed. this reflects in omori. omori is Very apathetic, and really, i dont think he would care to chase anybody unless it was for a quest. though, i guess killing survivors Is a quest for hunters, but. anyway

in battle, omori is a good fighter. his attacks are strong, (although not as strong as say. aubrey or kel. but who am i to say, the playthrough i watched had omori constantly sad) out of him and sunny, omori would be the attacker. so theres my choice for them

the umbrella can probably be switched for a knife. maybe an elongated knife. im not entirely sure, but i know the umbrella wont stay as an umbrella

basil as kurt frank

so i know what youre thinking. why is basil “the explorer??” hear me out this is actually a really good idea

the true best choice would be emma, since shes the gardener, but idv doesnt like giving characters skins of the opposite gender if you know what i mean. anyway

basil isnt a fighter. hes an assist, yes, but that was only for a crime four years ago. not my point, he wouldnt want to be in the action

i think he’d be a really good decoder. especially a good kurt

i originally wanted him to be prisoner, out of no bias whatsoever (/j) but kurt is a good fit for him

basil hides. he hides from things. he hides from the truth just like sunny, and he hides from others. albeit he still goes outside

i will not lie, i have a very personal grudge against kurt players. i dont want them to have anything because every kurt main ive come across was toxic to me specifically. but anyway

so one of kurts abilities is that he can go smaller to run around undetected and/or hide. i find this perfect for basil, because. yknow. hiding

his other ability is to find password pages and use them to decode ciphers faster. i think this would be funny because basils existence in headspace leads sunny to remembering the truth about maris death. i mean, if he werent in headspace, omori and the gang would continue going on adventures like nothing is wrong, so basil sort of speeds up the acknowledging process

this sounds dumb actually. but it makes sense in my head

anyway, the book would be turned into basils photo album, and he wouldnt have a backpack like kurt does. theres my answer

and finally,

aubrey as margaretha zelle

aubrey was actually really hard to pick out. none of the female survivors really fit her, aside from maybe coord, but i dont know what her gun would turn into. i will admit that her section wont be as detailed as basil or sunnys. but anyway my choice is with margie

aubrey imo would be a good kiter. she has strong stats all around, so i feel as if she’d be a great fit for margie. not to mention her speed boost when falling from large heights, which would make her a faster runner and harder to chase if used right. aubrey would be more physically fit since shes a fighter and seems to do a lot of stuff with the hooligans, which also helps prove that she should be a kiter. ANYWAY

so margie has these music boxes that can mess with the hunter, right? some of aubreys attacks can mess with enemies iirc. soooo theyre kind of similar in a way, arent they?

im not exactly sure what the music box can be turned into. maybe a small piano? aubrey cares about mari a lot, and the reason shes so pissed at everyone and rebellious is because she felt like everyone had forgotten about mari and moved on with their lives. so the music box could be a tribute to mari

i dont know how many changes they made with ann tamakis costume in the persona crossover, other than cosmetics for the skin only, so im not sure if the music box was changed at all. i can dream though

in the case that its changed, the blue box could be the song from the playground in headspace (yknow the one) while the red box could be the final duet song. but just with the piano, not the violin

essence

because yes, i thought about the essence too

of course, aside from the skins, there will be other stuff in the essence too. so itll be as follows:

for portraits, theyre going to be the neutral battle portraits from headspace. aside from basil and mari, who do not have battle portraits. theirs will just be of their neutral expressions with the neutral emotion backround behind them. i would add pictures, but the character pictures add up to six, so i’d run out of room before reaching part two

for graffiti, im not really sure. maybe everyones overworld sprites in headspace? along with maybe one of Something

for accessories, i actually have an idea of what thesell be. theyre going to be character exclusive accessories, just like how tpn did theirs

for aubrey, she’ll have mr plantegg. i was thinking of maybe having her bat as an accessory, but

OH ACTUALLY her bat could be a shop accessory that changes the music boxes!! probably an a tier tbh

anyway, the essence accessory for her is mr plantegg, and its there strictly for cosmetic purposes. for basil, he’d get either a pair of garden shears, or a basil plant, since yknow. his names basil. this is also for cosmetic purposes

they all are. i should say that now, the accessories are all cosmetic except aubreys a tier shop bat

finally, for sunny, im not entirely sure what to give him. i could give him a knife, sure, but then he’d have two knives because of the umbrella. maybe a steak? or a pair of red hands? im torn on this

and that concludes part one

part two

**PLEASE BE AWARE THAT MARIS IMAGE HAS THE PHOTO FROM THE TRUTH ALBUM WHERE SHES HANGING FROM THE TREE. IF YOU DONT WANT TO SEE IT, SKIP PAST IT. SHES THE FIRST CHARACTER IM PUTTING ON HERE

part two consists of mari, hero, and kel. do not separate them </3

here are my character choices:

mari as yidhra

so i know yidhra may seem like a weird choice. i originally thought of maybe mary, but this makes sense to me

yidhra herself will be mari. im not sure which version, but even though i have real world mari in the photo, maybe headspace mari would be better. nobody can see her anyway lmao

yidhras servants will be, again, mari, but she looks as she did when basil and sunny hung her on the tree. her hairs covering her face, with her right eye being visible. kind of like the girl from the ring, but anyway yeah

yidhra is the dream witch. she haunts your dreams and she haunts mine when i go against her. maris death haunts everyone, especially sunny and basil (whom know the truth of what happened,) so this just seems like a perfect fit

her death is “leeched” onto everyones minds (pun entirely intended), so attaching herself to survivors with only her death appearance visible is mmmm

instead of an axe, maybe her weapon can be the jump rope she was hung from? and it can be used as a whip? that makes the most sense to me idk

im not good at explaining things, but if you were to see dream witch in a match, youd know how good this would work

also brings a new meaning to “my thoughts will follow you into your dreams” HELLO

hero as norton campbell

so hero was kind of hard for me to pick too. i wanted him to be a support character, but looking around, there are. barely any that would work. my closest choice was victor, but?? the letters???? they dont correlate

hero doesnt give me kiter vibes, but nortons good at rescues too, as long as youre in an area with obstacles. and usually, when someone dies in battle, hero can make life jam to revive the fallen party member

nortons magnets are used to either bring the hunter closer to him, or push the hunter away. both can be used to stun with obstacles. while hero doesnt have any stun attacks that i can remember, he does have charming abilities that can be used to take damage for the other party members. so similar stuff? idk

i guess his magnets can be turned into chocolate chip cookies, since thats what he uses to heal everyone. if not cookies, then i dont know

oh actually one of nortons abilities is called “attract.” thats so funny if you put hero as him lmao

heros section is kind of short, my bad

kel as william ellis

come on. who else were you expecting me to use? its the basketball man as the football man

while kel is a fighter in battle, he can also be used as a backup healer. aubrey is the main fighter of the group, and hero is the main healer. so hes kind of a catch-all in a sense

kels an athlete. he plays basketball. williams an athlete. he plays football. need i say more

im not gonna lie, this is kind of a don tpn situation where it just Makes Sense that kel would be william

the football will probably be replaced with either a rubber ball or a basketball, depending on which skin youre using. the former is for headspace kel, the latter for real world kel

the buffs and debuffs for william makes sense on kel too. kel would probably have trouble with something as (probably) complex as the cipher machines, and the struggle and vaulting buffs show off his athleticisim

same with the football, using rush to rescue is such a kel thing to do

essence

for part two, there will be about the same things as part one

the portraits will be the neutral battle portraits, this time with the real world counterparts of everyone. basil and maris will be their neutral expressions on the neutral battle background. though, since mari doesnt have Real real world portraits, i guess they could use the one from the one i used on the mari yidhra picture

for graffiti, it can be the real world overworld sprites

in terms of accessories, theyre still cosmetic and character exclusive. maris can be the white egret orchid, since thats the flower that represents her. heros can be a spatula, as thats his weapon of choice in headspace. for kel, im not sure. hes using the ball as a weapon so???

maybe he can get a cactus, because thats his assigned plant

in terms of shop items, i think i know the perfect thing

mewo as a pet

mewo my beloved. nobody could ever forget you

mewo would be a hunter pet. she would be cool for survs too i guess, but considering both her owners are hunters.....

mewo would probably follow the hunter around, not really doing much. i think it would be Extremely funny though if every time a survivor was chaired, she just chilled next to them in the pose shes always in in white space

thats pretty much it. if you got this far, thank you!! i spent like two hours writing this whole thing out LMAO damn

#this is soooo long im so sorry #but im having a moment LMAO #identity v #idv #omori #omori game

[enderspawn]

🎼 (I can’t find the correct emoji lol) exile arc tommy?

Oh boy! (opens up breakdown playlist) /hj

Montreal – Penelope Scott

Sleep with a Baseball Bat – Cosmic Johnny

Brother – Gerard Way

breakdown under cut, tw for suicidal ideation on the first song esp

1.       Montreal – heehee hoohoo suicidal/depression thoughts baby!!

I mean in short this is tommy saying he wont Survive exile. The intro of the song lists when the singer would be home from college/school and that “another 90 day summers gonna take [their] fucking life” which is rlly just. Tommy not gonna live THAT long in exile.

“And I would rather die And let me make it clear It's nobody's fault But I think we all know That I won't make it to Montreal”

So the thing here is that its “nobody’s fault” bc on one hand it is that he doesn’t blame tubbo but worse he doesn’t blame DREAM. Its just meant to happen, its not bc of anybody, yknow?

“And I would rather die I'll jump before I'll fall And I'm having lots of fun But I won't make it Montreal”

Mans tried to jump to his death before he “fell” whether bc of dream or an accident, hes makin the active CHOICE to end it rather than just waiting. Even w the fun he’s having w dream, he’s miserable and he knows he wont make it to see lmanberg again

“You like to talk about the future As if it's real And when you tell me that you love me I can almost feel it”

Dream keeps promising him stuff for the future. Maybe he can visit to see the tree, maybe he can get another visit, maybe he wont be alone. But tommy doesn’t care, its all fake to him (which like, it is so good for him but fjkdlsjf)

“It's not that it's a bad plan No, the plan fucking slapped I was so excited you don't know how bad I wanted all of it The coffee shop, the weather, the apartment But I don't want anything anymore I don't know, I guess I just got bored”

Okay so. Tommy kept trying to get shit together to leave, right? He wanted to go back so bad and have this domestic life w his friends but in the end he just got so downtrodden that after his shit got blown up he was so ready to just GIVE UP.

“And I don't wanna die I don't wanna get left behind But it's better half than none I hope to god you have some fun”

He doesn’t want to be in this situation, he still CARES abt the lmanberg crew but in the end hes been told that they’re happy WIHTOUT him. He’s not angry at them, not anymore, he just wants them to be happy bc he isn’t.

2.       Sleep with a Baseball Bat – tommy and dream relationship baby!!

“And every time you wake up Thinking this could be the day Well something, something just”

Every day in exile he had no real plans. He just had to exist out there alone and hope someone else came. This IS the day he can do…. Something. He doesn’t know. He doesn’t have a goal.

“And when your love is an anxiety attack Don’t settle for that, don’t settle for that And when you wake and find the claw marks in your back Sleep with a baseball bat, sleep with a baseball bat”

Hes been manipulated into thinkin dream is his friend, that dream “loves” him but it makes him miserable! Hes paranoid and stressed and falling apart!! Boy!!! Fjdsklfj

“Siena says you’re getting used But something’s broken in your head And you can’t run away when you need to”

The other ppl who visited him, like ranboo, KNEW something was happening and that he was in a bad place but tommy had been manipulated by dream so much that he couldn’t process it. No, dream couldn’t be bad, dream was his friend, right? He couldn’t leave exile, dream would be upset. Its all what DREAM wants, not tommy.

“Hey, space cadet Are you still floating round the rock That you spent so much of your life trying to get away from? And does it at least look different from up there?”

OKAY SO ONE. SPACE CADET? THAT’S CLARA BABY!! TWO: he spent ALL his time on this server fucking fighting dream, trying to “get away from” him. But now hes stuck “floating around” with him as his “friend”. The last line feels sarcastic and bitter but like. FUCK it hits, yknow??

“It might take a couple tries till you believe it But love is real, you’ll figure it out, you’ll live to see it But you still have to take a couple of falls And you can’t make an omelet without breaking your balls So batter up Is your bed made? Is your helmet on?”

HAPPY ENDING POG!! HE STARTS HEALING!!!! HE STARTS REALIZING DREAM WASN’T HIS FRIEND!!! He still “falls” and relapses into wanting dream w him but hes so much better!!! Also,,,,, “is your helmet on” w the turtle shell helmet (eyes emoji)

3.       Brother – IF TECHNO AND TOMMY NOT BROTHERS WHY THIS SON—(gunshot rings out)

Okay so on a serious note this song is abt addiction and while I don’t want to take away from that Serious Topic, it Does relate but w tommy dealing w his ptsd of dream

“And brother, if you have the chance to pick me up And can I sleep on your couch To the pound of the ache and pain? Oh, in my head 'Cause I'm awake all night long To the drums of the city rain”

Hhrhnrng staying at technos place to hide from dream and get better a lil JFKDLSJK. Also “the drums of the city rain” is referenced a LOT in this song but like. It keeps him up so,,,,,, dream JFKDLSJF. Mans barely ever slept in exile so it WORKS okay jfkdlsjf

“The lights we chase The nights we steal The things that we take to make us feel this (To the drums of the city rain)”

This is him and techno livin together!! Like in the first chorus you could see lights we chase being tommy finding techno’s place, then later it’s the lights of lmanberg as they sneak in. the nights they steal is both just time spent together and also straight up the times they stole shit JFKDSLJ. “the things that we take to make us feel” is the gapples tommy always eats so that he can feel safe (also, bc in the og song this is PROBABLY abt drugs and potions are drugs in universe so. Arguably getting a potion effect from the apple means it is Also Drugs? Fjdkslfj)

“I can't go back I don't think I will I won't sleep tonight as long as I still Hear the drums of the city rain”

Go back to logstedshire or lmanberg you ask?? The answer is yes. Both. He feels like he doesn’t belong in lmanberg and logstedshire is too traumatizing for him to return at this point. As long as he “hears the drums of the city rain”, or is thinking of dream, he Cant Sleep:tm:

“Does anyone have the guts to shut me up? 'Cause I believe that every night There's a chance we can walk away So hold on tight Because I won't wait too long In the drums of the beating rain”

Okay so hear me out but. This is just tommy and dream. “I believe that every night theres a chance we can walk away” is tommy hoping desperately for dream to let him go home, to walk away from logstedshire. He never will be permitted, not really, but theres a chance that tommy clings to. He wont “wait too long” while out in exile and stuck w dream bc hes desperate and miserable (also fun fact these analysis is basically me just pmv’ing shit in my head and rambling vaguely abt it but like. Listen,,,, flashback verse jfkdsljf) ALSO. The line “does anyone have the guts to shut me up” in relation to exile!tommy is just VERY important to me. Mans was so quiet and afraid to speak up when in exile.

“'Cause the nights don't last And we leave alone Will you drive me back? Can you take me home? (To the drums of the city rain)”

Following up that last paragraph, this is still in flashback. The days end and dream leaves again, making tommy alone. He asks if he can go back, if he can see home and lmanberg and everyone. But echoing the “to the drums of the city rain” after home CAN imply that “home” has become logstedshire WITH DREAM even tho it keeps him up and aaAAAAAHHHH

I swear this ends up okay and techno + tommy focused fjkdsljf

“Faces I don't know I am tired in the glow”

He feels isolated from everyone during his exile and lashes out at those who visit, to the point he feels like they’re all more or less strangers and “faces he doesn’t know”. Being tired in the glow is, imo, him over the lava.

“Of the freezing club Keep me breathing Don't make the lights come back Can you take me home? We all need this When we leave alone”

Hhhngg okay so tommy breakdown time! Hes in techno’s house (the freezing club) and is just pleading for techno to help. Don’t let “the lights come back” (lava again maybe? He doesn’t want to be Like This?) and just wants to feel like hes at home because hes just left exile and hes Messed Up Over It

“Remember when you and I would make things up? So many nights, just take me down To the place we can hear them play I miss that sound 'Cause now we don't sing so loud To the drums of the city rain”

OKAY SO THEY MAY NOT BE CANON FAMILY BUT WILBUR REMEMBERS SPARRING W TECHNO AS A KID AND PHIL IS HIS CLOSE FRIEND SO THEY STILL KNEW EACH OTHER AS KIDS SO SHUSH FJSDKL. Tommy just wants things to go back to how they were, before everything. When things were easy and they were kids just having fun. He misses it. Before exile, before lmanberg, before dream. But it doesn’t matter, because they’re stuck in this now. With his brother dead and his closest friend being the man who killed his best friend and helped blow up his country. Again, the drums of the city rain is dream. Because of his influence, its all different.

Hhhngngngn this is too long so I wont go into the last outro bc you can interpret it a LOT of ways, esp depending on how you want to Pace this song w the exile arc. But like. The analysis is THERE if you really wanna push it/animatic it babeyyy

#dream smp #mcyt #tommyinnit #exile arc #HHHHNG IM SORRY THIS IS SO LATE JFKLDSJ #I PROMISED MYSELF ID FINISH THIS ASK GAME UP AND WOULDNT GO IN DEPTH AS MUCH THEN DID EXACTLY THAT W THREE SONGS JFKDSL #tommy #answered #song ask game #listen the last song is a LIL bit of a stretch but its my playlist i get to put in the not depressing song fjdkls #Anonymous

[crystu-cii]

XDD

I f e e l that pain in my soul-- my older sister uses cologne sometimes and it is sO STRONG AND WILL NOT STAY CONFINED TO HER ROOM-- AMD SOMETIMES SHED DO IT IN THE DOORWAY LIKE HELLO-- XDD

YEAH WH GET SOME SLEEP LEAVE THE STAYING UP TO US-- XDD

YES BABY JAIL, INTO THE UPSIDE DOWN LAUNDRY BASKET YOU KNIFE-WIELDING HEATHEN-- XDD oms XDD well I don't know them but I love them- YESSS THEYRE SO FLUFFY-- I'm actually curious what images pop up first imma check-- FLUFFY PUPPIES-- we've actually never owned ones that fluffy(those actually look more similar to shetland sheepdogs than the shelties we've had so far?? Very similar/similar enough where if someone doesn't know a sheltie we mention shetland sheepdogs), our current one is a purebred that we got for free(she was being given away bc her family never came back for her and the lady taking care of her couldn't afford the time to take care of a second dog long-term think) and she's got pretty short fur in comparison- still fluffy enough, but not quite so long of fur-- she's a blue merle(absolutely gorgeous fur, she's like 8 now with a lot of health problems but she's super loving still 💕💞) anyways about the fur, so long as you brush regularly you should mitigate most of that, and it mostly collects in corners- but like.. be prepared to eat and wear dog fur for the rest of your life-- (actually there's a thing called a fur zapper we bought recent that you put in with your clothes when you wash/dry them(I think it's dry but idk??) that's supposed to get a lot of hair off your clothes in that process? Also lint rollers are your best friend--) AND roombas are really helpful(we bought a knockoff one and rarely have to sweep ever so 👀) XDD WHEEZE I can't even imagine what you did-- but like you could ask for a budgie/parakeet /hj I mean, they aren't very expensive (actually they're pretty cheap) but they're very loud, need a lot of attention(especially if you want them to bond to you!) and you need to research into them a lot to make sure you're doing things right-- loads of vids online!! Loads of websites too!!! I'd know I have one- JUST A WARNING, FEATHERS AND SEED HULLS GET ALL OVER YOUR FLOOR XD p l u s like you have a friend who knows stuff about birbs :3 anyways ENOUGH RAMBLING FROM ME WOW THAT GOT LONG--

💕💕 I feel that XD OMS-- I WISH-- WHAT A D R E A M - s n a k - Awww but what a mood XD

XDDD oms YES-- EXACTLY-- XDDDD another good thing you should try eventually is SWEET POTATO CASSEROLE WHICH IS APPARENTLY DELICIOUS??? I TRIED IT FOR THE FIRST TIME(AT LEAST IN A WHILE) TODAY AND IT WAS SO FUCKIN TASTY????

H E A THEN-- XDD how cool of them to try tho :3 whEEZE Y 'A LL-- XDD

WHEEZE I SUCK WITH INSTRUMENTS SOOOO-- DAMN THA'S SOME BAD LUCK MY DUDE-- MAYBE YOU'RE CURSED DAMN-- oms wOWW--

Yesss-- ooh I've never played 👀 seen some stuff but never played-- (see: my computer sucks XD) I h a v e played Portal 1 and it is SO GOOD and SO SHORT and I WISH I HAD GOTTEN PORTAL 2 INSTEAD BUT THATS OKAY CRIES-- YESSSS THE SONGS SLAP--- ALSO THERE ARE ACTUALLY TWO WHOLE MORE CANON(PROBABLY KINDA MAYBE NOT?? IDK) SONGS, ONE FROM A LEG DIMENSIONS GAME("You Wouldn't Know") AND ONE THAT WAS CUT FROM PORT TWO("Don't Say Goodbye"(Harry101UK made an edit to make it Glados' voice!!)) THERE ARE ALSO A BUNCH OF GOOD FAN SONGS SO YEAH-- ALSO NOT TO BE A SIMP BUT GLADOS' VOICE? PERFECTION. I LOVE HER. ALSO I COULD LITERALLY DETAIL THE PORTAL LORE I AM INCREDIBLY EMOTIONALLY INVESTED IN THIS GAME-- ALSO THERES A CLIP THAT SOMEONE MADE USING A (VERY GOOD) GLADOS TTS TO HAVE GLADOS SAY TRANS RIGHTS AND ENBY RIGHTS AND IF I FIND IT AGAIN ILL SEND IT TO YOU-- YOU COULD PROBABLY FIND IT IF YOU LOOM UP GLADOS SAYS TRANS RIGHTS? IT HAS A VIDEO WITH TRANS FLAG COMPANION CUBES ACCOMPANYING IT-- ALSO YES THE PORT MODS(/ADD-ONS? MAYBE? THEY'RE COMMUNITY MADE I THINK BUT IDK ALL I KNOW IS THAT THEYRE COOL AF--) (also I apologize for all the screaming? XD it's like, four am and I was talking about portal so.. whoops?)

Right like wth???? I???? Okay but like December to February babies just fuckin DONT EXIST IN THIS GEN OR SOMETHIN-- CAUSE I FIND N O N E -- Maybe there are more December babies but there are definitely like NO January to February babies it is So Weird--

NEJFQOBGKW WOWW d an g like-p l e a se s t op over sp r aying-- xD and LEGITTTT LIKE- THAT WAS M Y ROLE TO STAY UP LATE- XDD

WHEHEHEZE- LAUNDRY BASKET TIME- G E T I N XDD anD YESS- any doggo is just such a cute doggo 😭💞💞 but for me- fLUFFY ONES ARE WHERE ITS A T- and ohhhh i see- FOR FREE?? W H A T A S T E A L XDD but awwww the poor doggg at least she's with you now ! ;0;; 💞💞😭 aaw such a lovable puppup 😭😭💞 and oHHH i see :00 but oh no- xD i also have a friend that has two dogs and whenever he would give me gifts- there would be dog hair on them no matter what- XDD and ooOhhh those sound really helpful! omg- i swear i dont have to have a pet for the need of a roomba- i already shed so much hair myself its so crazy-- xDD and oH MAN loud animals are really gon get my mom fired up- and OO birds just look so cuteee i always fantasize of having one- but then again- with the noise and all xD the more i think about it i dont think we are prepared to have a pet at all xD but i still dream of at least having one pet in my lifetime!

and OO that sounds awesome!! i have no clue if i even tried casserole before- man- sometimes i just eat food without even knowing wth it is XDDD but THAT SOUNDS so gooodddd :O

and LEGITT LIKE- TF IS HAPPENING WITH MY SCHOOL LIFE- XDD and oh my god- IT GETS WORSE- that year there was a FREAKINGG FIREEEEEEE- it wasnt that dangerous thank god- but it had to get a whole ass room renovated because of it- and guess what room it was- THE ORCHESTRA ROOM- AND GUESS WHAT M A D E I T W OR SE- that year- it was the first time the school replaced those 10+ year old instruments with new ones- NOW THEYRE B U R N T- and mind you that the school's budget isnt so- gr e a t- like oh my god i am still so bewildered over HOW MUCH chaos HAPPENED that year- and i thought that year was gon be the year- yknow? like UGH

and OHH MANN playing portal sounds awesome! but i just dont think the game would be worth my money cause i know the plot- and even with the mods and all my brain would be broken as i would possibly have no clue what to do- xDDD

and HOOOO MANNN game fan songs are just so AWESOMEEE- and those sound pretty cool! :OO and HOLY SHIT FUCK YEAH- GLADOS SAYS TRANS AND ENBY RIGHTS Y A LL- now im gonna look that up and let my ears be blessed by such words- XDDD and DONT WORRY BOUT SCREAMING ALOT- i scream a whole dam lot too XDD

and LEGITTT- finding someone's b-day in january and feb is so rare all of a sudden like wh a t - XDD

#the rambles of crystu #even tho we are legit friends on discord- ima still answer these XDDD

[macklives]

homestuck recap

i hated this so fucking much bc my 2 am bitch-ass didnt want to read a recap thats probably longer than any slowburn out there

anyways here it is

also, uhhH sorry im using this as a end of session discussion bc that shit gets explained in her as well. and im not writing up more recaps of a recap so this is where im done for the day. (by done for the day i mean last nights session, im still doing a liveblog soon. i just wrote this yesterday)

also that this is long

you dont have to read it, theres nothing of importance

ive been coping with humor to get me through it

neato.

have fun with what i suffered through:

why was “beta” the only thing unhighlighted?

like did i miss a page???

OH its the beta version of HS thats why

damn its like 5 pages and thats it

mmh

well youll all be happy to know im clicking every single one of these links again bc i like looking back like ahh i remember that. good times. also in case i forgot some shit existed.

do you think andrew had fun writing this? or was he like “fuck”

thats a lot of fucking package talk. good thing im not confused as of now and remember it pretty clearly. of else, this early on in the recap, id be screwed.

god remember when i did an analysis on each item and what it did

i feel as if i have the technology engrained inside my head right now

cruxite, alchemeter, all that jazz

flashbacks are starting up already

yeah, that was the good part in homestuck where i knew 100% that i probably would continue on this liveblog in its entirety, ngl

that one explosion scene. bc it kept me going.

OH W A IT SHIT

i just realized how the intermission spades probably fucking foreshadowed the whole jack revolts thing and gains the ring, which was also technically JOHNS fault considering he slashed up the doll in the first place

my god, i guess thats the only good aspect of the recap. looking back at things and realizing the missing pieces.

oh that makes sense for the whole “this prototyping had no effect on the enemies, since he was already in the medium” i didnt actually think about that

little did rose know where that would get her right now

oh yeah

there’s still the whole entire lab terminal thing and how mom basically knows the place exists. i guess we’re still venturing onto that and itll come up later when we find out how mom knows SO MUCH about the game.

still think shes some weird spy or secret agent

i kinda love her ngl

anyways, theres literally no reason for skaia to produce a cloning machine. so technically, they only sent the meteors in, right? so who put the cloning machine in if not mom?

oh yeah that impact was nerve wrecking asf

and still at this point in the comic i called dave fuckboy red

huh, how times change

i hated reading that whole paragraph ngl, the frustration just kicked me in the boobs again

yeah nobody else got tornadoes, huh?

OH that makes also much more sense

bc she did prototyped them before she entered the medium.

i gotcha

man one of my favorite edits i made, rose hitting that meteor with a bat

are you

telling me

the exiles structures they arrived on were in the form of the items the kids used to enter the medium?

THE EGG

THAT EXPLAINS “EGG”

of course it was 413 years ago. that was never explained. simply vague “many years in the future....” but i expected no less from this

man serenity is the most wholesome character in hs no doubt

damn thought andy here was really gonna spoil us jade’s planet

okay cool, im glad i now have the layout to the whole “their stations went to the coordinates of the home button” shindig

man i honestly dont know what else to say besides “yeah cool recap” when i already pretty much know what went down? ofc im looking into each link and shit and adding in things when i see fit, but otherwise its just me going “ah good times” yknow

the whole meteor thing kinda makes sense now?

we’re still missing a few pieces of info but we’re getting there, folks

oh yeah that reveal

god jade and dave have it in the shits for parents huh

bro isnt the best and jade has a fucking dog

who lowkey

is doing better than bro

who knew a fucking dog is a better guardian than bro lmfao

dreambot = terminator. im telling you.

sorry im still on that idea and it will never leave unless i have the actual proof in front of me that its not going to become a thing. meaning, ive finished hs and theres still no terminator dreambot or either andrew himself gives me a canon letter with “the robot is not arnold, mackenzie, pls just let it be”

why is the entire game session highlighted

i swear to god if this is like to a second recap or smth of the whole game session i may fucking CRY

okay thank god its just a design of the skaia layout

which is honestly cool

idk why its blurry tho but i can at least see the layout now. which is honestly how i pictured it anyways.

yeah, john did make a huge impact in his friends’ life and i find that so fucking touching

yep. got that. everything loops around. cool.

especially when the trolls come in. god we havent even gotten to that recap portion yet, we havent even gotten to the INTERMISSION

pls can this be the halfway point to the recap

AT LEAST

so they were exiled after the whole jack: ascend thing, right? considering theyre way in the future. man no fucking wonder.

speaking of jack

man that whole dad and jack interaction was gold, ngl

OH THAT EXPLAINS THE RING THEN

and wow, andrew’s really giving us the best female content huh. andrew is the true god of equality and diversity.

also hey, i didnt realize that wow. so PM tricked the queen in showing the parking ticket to be able to take the present from jack. she’s a smart cookie, that one..

she and PM basically snitched on jack and it was the best thing that has happened to me so far

oh yeah okay

but why did AR panic over bec? bc thats something we havent learned yet, right?

anyways

exile town, the only town which should exist. facts. i dont make the rules.

noice

i love PM being queen. like.. thats canon now. shes an actual queen.

yeah that was a fun game and the consorts were cute

fuck yeah the dick head

hate them even more now that i know john was killed because of them

anyways, i wonder what dick move dave’s denizen did? maybe thats why its filled with lava bc the denizen was like “fuck it. make the land red. kill them all”

UH WHAT

WHAT

OH MY GOD HOW DID I JUST FORGET NANNAS LETTER LIKE THAT LMFAO

THEIR TITLES WERE THERE THE WHOLE TIME!

so i still dont know what they mean but i can gather it has something to do with the game giving them abilities. considering dave is the “knight of time” and he can go back in time. whack.

which means john can either control someones breathing or simply wind. and rose is... like that one girl in the winx club who does the sun shit. bc whenever i think of light powers, i think of stella.

and jade is space. witch of space.

nice

i have no idea what that means ngl

okay finally

we’re at the trolls

maybe this recap will end soon

i remember when i thought they were internet bullies

yesss

someone asked if i basically knew the trolls were on a different veil than the kids, so not presently with them, and i know lol. i was making a joke before btw. jsyk. dont think im incompetent to forget these things when sometimes i choose to forget it so i can add in a joke

it be like that, i annoy many

then again, pls dont assume im trying to say im not incompetent bc im also a fucking dumbass and DO forget shit and i have no excuse

imagine being so bored on the meteor, your last resort is speaking to aliens

ngl me if i was ever trapped on a meteor and could potentially do that

nah ik its bc its their only hope at helping with their session or whatever tf CG said to john. but there was BOUND to be a conference meeting between them like “okay guys. humans. that needs to be sorted out” and you just hear CG screaming in the background

i cant wait to meet them honestly bc im growing on all 4 of the ones we’ve seen already. and on top of that, i know what they look like and i know theyre not THAT bad, just a little on the crayy zee side sometimes

but theyre trying

OH MY GOD

I GET IT

FUCK

DOES THAT MEAN THE INTERMISSION IS *APART* OF THE MAIN FUCKING STORY??

AND SPADES IS WV FOR THE TROLLS

GOD D A M N

wow

i didnt expect that. but maybe the signs were there and i was just willingly choosing to ignore it or smth bc “haha couldnt be, right”

flashbacks to how i thought the trolls were humans

anyways, i guess he got his revenge on the kids version of “snowman” ie the black queen. but really

he did not have to do that. he could have cut off the finger and fled. but he decided “nah, lets implode her” so the loml is dead and all i got was a catchy song

i knew they were different types of “bullies” but now i just have to replace bullies with uhh

trolling strategies

anyways, this is cute. i love how they’ve come to be friends through mutual frustration. good part in the comic.

i wonder why it explodes

more importantly

....

terminator time?

this was my favourite sequences of dialogues in the whole entirety of homestuck. that is to say the back and forth thing that the kids went through to become a sort of wingman for the other.

absolutely gold.

all except AT’s rap.

GC was the only smart one with the linear shit

anyways fuck he still has to kill the denizen now but apparently its hard to beat for a sleeping dick head so

that will be fun for the future

john will probably need to kill A LOT of imps to get there

yeah rose is a badass bc she slayed that thing with needles of all things

OH and the white queen was the cursive

damn did AR ever do the whole guide process to a kid yet? maybe he will with dave, idk

oHHH

i fucking SEE

thats why he said DNA

to use it and replace all the life forms in the ocean

fucking neat wow

man that sounded sarcastic but im genuinely impressed bc all i got was bullshit as i read jaspersprites log

so thats the secret. it was “meow” bc that somehow translates to the genetic code she needs then. and that code apparently took fucking years to write as well. sick. whack. oh man.

derse is very pretty, ngl

and wow shit

“dave had already been awake in his tower all along without realizing it” how tf does someone just

do that, awake in both places at once

i didnt even fucking realize that fact as i read that pesterlog wow

ah yes, around the time things got confusing

okay so the capsule makes sense bc at first i didnt know it was a fucking time capsule so i got confused as to how it just apparated the game lmfao

the more you know i guess *twinkle*

i find that a neat concept tho

like the whole whatever you prototype affects the imps and shit

yeah so that whole “he had no advice” basically impacted his future

no shit dave wanted to reset things bc he probably thought he caused some sort of bad butterfly effect and killed his best friend

fuck calsprite thats all im gonna say

i read that first sentence and i think i got an aneurysm

and then everything else just made me sad again

i mean good thing he fucking did amirite?

we got pain at first but now we got cool shit like idk

fucking DAVESPRITE

damn idk how that works

will rose have like two minds now? or will this be some steven universe fusion shit?

“and understood their meaning” course well i fucking didnt so could you pls elaborate, rose?

okay but then what the fuck did he use that was inside the fucking box

bc i thought he used his knife?

im only every going to refer him as that now, thank you andrew

alright okay..

god that was a lot

i dont know what will happen once i click on those links but i am going to see that for myself bc i refuse to add ANYTHING ELSE

#homestuck #homestuck liveblog #hs65 #hs65 end #act4 #pg1674 #THANK FUCK FUCKING CHRIST #THIS TOOK ME A SOLID 4 HOURS IN TOTAL TO DO #INCLUDING PROCRASTINATION THO #LIKE I DID SNIPPETS WHILE I WAS AT WORK #AND THE MAJORITY LAST NIGHT #GOD #NEVER AGAIN #anyways #i learned some new stuff but then again this isnt even worth it for you all #like i didnt even say anything witty enough for it to be at least entertaining #just 'man that was cool' #and other synonyms of that sentence #im so sorry this took so long #and was tedious to read

[unproduciblesmackdown]

weird to think back on things like the funky experience of being The All A’s/B’s gang and then The All A’s person during middle school and the Smart Kid designation cuz we all have a godawful time within the k-12 education system and also in Higher Education / academia as well and the setup isn’t like, good for anyone though natch between the “lack of attention / occasional positive attention” and “frequent / negative attention” ends of the experience the former is preferable; apparently weird to have been Good Student passing b/c again idk i have good retention and could memorize shit in homeroom for a quiz that day and that was great b/c actually i had godawful / nonexistent study habits and actually basically hated school and did anything last minute and all but like whatever, i could figure out / understand and remember shit more efficiently / faster than usual so like, idk, i’d get wild results ig. and anyways yeah Smart Kid throughout all of k-12 but like, although i don’t think i’m Not smart in any way, it’s like, but no i hated school and never really tried, that inferred correlation wasn’t there but like also there’s the weird Presumed Identity for you. and it Was weird b/c idk i was like, okay? “perpetually nebulous / imprecise / uncertain sense of identity” gang out here and i’m like hmm okay Am i “the good grades getter?” and then apparently you are cuz like welp that’s the Expectation, and also in my case i was also in the “oops let’s minimize ptsd party” gang of Gotta Get As/Bs motivation..............the point is like, it’s funny how despite that concept of what The A’s Getter is, by now i’m like oh but that’s not even like, my Main Thing, much less my Whole thing. my main thing is that i get wildly interested and passionate about stuff and when i’m really about shit i’m So about it and into it and all that yknow. and it’s like, would be cool if i hadn’t had to like, first fight past this arbitrary Assigned Box to even start to figure out what i’m Really like. but Schools aren’t out here about like allowing for people to be varied individuals and shit. plus, weirdly i’m not sure if i hadn’t had that “Positive” Label to supplant any others that my autistic ass would’ve been largely left alone as much as it generally was............even I didn’t get through middle school w/o some light bullying peppered in there but hey for the most part i got by. and like, i remember 15 was a time for a wild Agonizing Spike cuz that was the point i was having to try to settle on a college major and i was like bitch i don’t know!!! for starters how is every 19 / 20 y.o supposed to know!!! but like litchrelly a year and a half ago my ass was in middle school and barely had any opportunities to individually choose what to pursue, and even if i Had an interest i would sometimes assume if it didn’t seem like The Smart Kid choice i would just assume that like, my interest would only be Allowed to go so far. so yeah i’m 14-15 for the first time having a little breathing room and allowed to pick out my own shit and investigate various stuff (cuz of the luck of getting to live on campus aka parents are Not around and i can be around for more than just Classes) and yet like, that wasn’t enough time to suddenly Fully Realize The Whole Of My Own Identity And What My Actual Passions And Life Goals And Etc Are. plus i kinda remember that i figured i’d flunk out and so was kinda Not spending freshman year expecting to actually be able to do this college thing.....so yeah i always distinctly remember the Stress of sophomore year with this Timer counting down of “gotta declare a major oh god” and trying somehow to Realize What I’m Even Like (i did partially lmao outside of the Academic aspect of it) and obviously like, that’s a Lot.......................plus it was kind of doomed anyways cuz i do remember that when i even mentioned the fact of like “hey what if i majored in ______ [cuz i’m evidently actually like thinking social issues are what i’m thinking i could dedicate my attention to, i’m 15 idk trying to figure this shit out]” and it got immediately brushed off cuz of my mom’s assumptions about what i was like based on my being Smart(tm) and my not wanting to tell my parents about anything Actually about myself by that point so that was like..........well cool to know that that’s not an option for me anymore thanks to immediate dismissal........................like i totally remember that by sophomore year i was def Swiss Idol and “i don’t have a clue what to major in” was a big part of that 9_9...............and like, doing college early is kinda crazy but also Not having high school to mayyyybe figure things out for a bit before hurtling towards Declare Major at 92384 mph is like, would it have helped? who can say. but for example, i know Now i’m a theatre gay, and the limited number of friends-ish i made at college was basically all theatre gays what a surprise, but i myself didn’t ever touch that because i had No direct experience with it, because middle school didn’t have that extracurricular, and then being dropped into hs with people who did? i was like fuck i’m not auditioning for shit i really don’t know how to do. i’m not even Supposed To Be Here goddamn!! i can karaoke avpm in the first floor lounge that’s IT!! fuckin r.i.p. but i mean also i Know high school is it’s own fuckin mess that’s hardly like “flourish as individuals!!” all a sudden. like how i don’t know if i’d’ve been “solid B’s” gang if i would’ve had more room to just figure out my own shit earlier, or if things would’ve been even More miserable cuz of my replacement Type being something more frowned upon cuz weird loser was def waiting in the wings............and then of course Smart Kid expectation constraints wasn’t hardly the only issue in holding back that “oh wait but what am i like *Actually*” process cuz if i was in high school i would’ve been around my parents every day and That was just as much if not more a hindrance in figuring myself out. like going to college may have been useful in that yes i did learn shit but if nothing else i am glad for it b/c the strides i made in “god damn i have to get away from these people (my parents lmfao)” and knowing at least that i’m not Like what THEY thought i was like was E ssen tial Knowledge..........but anyhow like the point of looking back on this shit isn’t to figure out How To Have Run The Perfect Course cuz obviously what’s the point in imagining as broad a what-if, but it’s good for Understanding shit currently..........like oh yeah this crap probably Affected me!! and you gotta know the history to understand the present...............it’s just really wild how like, Passion and (rarely activated) Energy And Intense Interest is like, what i consider my Thing now, and that was like. not what i ever heard anyone else tell me that’s what i’m Like, like, ever basically. i mean not that i don’t think i’m Not smart. it’s just like, not my whole thing and it just kinda feels more incidental, right. What If the whole time i’d been able to pursue whatever i felt like is a wiiiiiiiild question i don’t even know. there’s been so Little of that that’s its absolutely off the shits to be able to put together “oh right i’ve been a theatre gay all along” and “actually i Have performed on stage a decent number of times and supremely thrived in those experiences and i Know i was interested cuz i wished like (@ my family: dni)” and have this very simple (and thus far unusable) Knowledge about something i actually like and am interested in, cuz for the most part it’s [??? ?? ? ?? ???]

on a shorter but related note: the Camaraderie i feel with everyone in the “either has or wants to or would even seriously consider Cutting Ties with parent/s" gang and like, always very Interested in the various experiences within this v broad category. cuz there are so many factors playing into Why you’re in this group and then there’s so many factors in regards to whether someone actually feels able to ditch a ‘rent or two, and then beyond that, all the factors in whether someone’s actually able to............like, knowing that it’s never “lucky” to have to be in this group in the first place, i fairly am Lucky about it in many ways cuz, first of all, lucky to have been able to actually execute [eff off from parents] maneuver, and lucky to get to Know that’s what i totally needed to do........we are all Valide in how we try to deal with relations w/ parents that are so bad you even have to think about “maybe i have to Not Have This Person In My Life At All” and like, when people are dealing with that but Don’t feel they have the option to truly cut that parent or two out of their life, that’s like, well as someone who once felt that way and can Empathize and yet also had these Factors Line Up which let me peace out which aren’t factors that are in play for everyone (as well as a lack of other factors which Are relevant for others and which might mean Leaving Behind Parent/s 5eva isn’t an option they’d consider) it’s like Oh wow, let me hear more about that experience. tldr the camaraderie

oh and ps. it’s funny how like, in my post-being-in-school life, i thiiiiiiiink people usually probably assume i’m Kinda Dumb if anything. cuz the Grades don’t exist anymore but i’m still autistic!!!!! which is another wild factor in thinking about like “well what if [some aspect of my life] had been entirely different, hmmm” cuz it’s like. well i’d’ve still been autistic lmao..............the Social shit has like, been an issue even before the other usual shit in school cuz i Knew i wasn’t fitting in at preschool when all we were doing was like, learning colors and going outside. and it always was a bit distressing to me Never really having more than a couple friends and even then not that close or anything, right? and also how i’d try to Fix this with various strategies and trying out different situations like “oh well i’m not putting myself out there i’ll put myself out there” [tries it and it half-backfires] or “well if i’m spending a weekend with people who know me from Online they’re gonna like me for sure” [majority of ppl in a sub Friend Group i’m peripheral to and i’m intermittently stressed the whole time] “Ah Fuck” lmao and honestly only recently am i like oh right..............when you’re autistic socializing just in a very fundamental way is really like That*.................(*a way i can’t easily explain lmao)............like really just in mad recent times kind of realizing like, oh, okay, i don’t think i can ever Adjust My Approach and just suddenly become good at Easily Makes Friends and that kind of shit..............finally just kinda realizing like ohh right okay i really just do Not do “normal good conversation” like you’re supposed to and that’s just chill The Way It Is not necessarily “not good enough at it” way but It Just Is Different way like........yeah it can be Not Pointless to try to modify your social approach and that’s true for absolutely anyone, but like say, if i’m like oh if i simply get Better at [social interaction task] i will then finally be Good at it, it’s like, shit well that’s honestly just not how it works for me. like, #getting how after a point it’s like “okay learning to do [task] in a way that’s more [like this] is maybe gonna be better for Masking / seeming allistic but like, not for Actually giving me a social experience that’s more fulfilling for Me.” Plus, it’s like, i’m also way more (or okay at least As Much) socially limited by external factors, probably. 

pps oh and also, tangentially related b/c Autistique, it’s wild how every time you delve into (something At All specific about autism) you’ll probably learn something Utterly new about autism which is like god damn this isn’t That niche why haven’t i heard this!! why do i have to know there are 538 other would-be “i should already know this” revelations waiting for me about this topic cuz you have to manage to dig up this stuff on your own and dodge all the unhelpful bullshit types of sites where it’s Not about info from people / for people who are autistic? please. it’s almost like this is a constant and important part of my identity that affects p much every aspect of my life and is helpful to hear others’ info about the collective experience of it b/c like, it’s literally all in your own head and you can’t just somehow Know the ways you’re different in that realm just from emergent traits you can pick up on and figure out. ugh!!!! anyways

this is LONG but NO readmore b/c eh. who am i if not [i hope everyone hates my blog this week.jpg] every week

#NOTHING could make me a ''good student'' lmfao low effort and procrastination FOREVER!!!! #i studied a little bit the night before for my driving exam AND the sats........did gr8 on both b/c the devil's watching out for me #I Shouldn't Be Alive title card #but anyways i WILL tag this #long post /// #oh and you KNOW the same source got me thinking abt all this these past couple days......u_u #anyways at this point i am like lmao oh yeah i'm Not easy to interact with! and i usually don't find it easy to interact w/ everyone! #that's how it be on this bitch of an earth..

[littlebabycrybtch]

like,,,, sld;fsld yall it really is as simple as you unfortunately dont make the rules, the oppressors with power make the rules, ie straight people, and they dont Want aces and dont get nuanced lgbt+ discourse and think we’re just another fucking flavor of lgbt and will treat us as such whether you want them to or not. like. you cant. change that aspect of it with discourse. you can ignore it every time we try and bring it up but ya cant make it go away. literally every time our erasure turns to visibility, cishets hate our existence (yes,.,, even cishet aces,,, bc of the whole ‘ace’ part,,, which isnt cis or het) and it becomes unsafe for us. lmao im so tired of this shit like you dont,,, have a right to talk over us and tell us that isnt the case or smth bc number fucking 1. Yall never listen to us and push us away so how Tf do u think u would even know how ace ppl experience life anymore, if u wont even occasionally let the narrow forced relatable meme personality drop for a sec to show genuine human emotion and think critically about your morals and rampant vicious actions towards a group most of yall can Admit is marginalized lmAo, and 2. you literally would not do this to any other group you viewed as human beings who werent top tier privileged oppressors like. and we have tried to explain soo many fucking times now why we dont have any fucking power over anybody!!! bc ffs on What Earth should we be considered a major threat when we are consistently forced to experience corrective rape and heteronormative prejudice and medical discrimination (ATTEMPTED CONVERSION THERAPY AND DENIAL OF TREATMENT, NOT JUST ‘do you perhaps have trauma?’ SHIT). like. you are the only other group that experiences these things in this way and is capable of providing the support we need to combat these things!!!!! not the group we’ve “chosen”, the ONLY GROUP. THATS WHY WE ASK FOR YOUR HELP. not bc we wanna ruin ur fuckin day and infiltrate the gay resources and say we’re EXACTLY as oppressed as you are, bc yknow what. nobody in the lgbt community is exactly as oppressed as the next! its not that complicated! it never needed this much of debate bc the most basic way to understand this is that if straight ppl dont fucking want us and if you’ve ever met a straight person you know they view anything not 100% straight as automatically gay, and we’re gonna stay struggling with that without outside intervention, what else are we supposed to Do when we experience injustices like this. how are we expected to just be completely okay living like that. smh dont you dare fucking say ‘get over it’ like. lmaooo, thats not how activism works. pls tell me you understand why a struggling group would want you to help them. struggle less. like. less injustices would be rly cool tbh. id like to exist in a not marginalized way bc i shouldnt have to. dont rly think im a bad person for that just bc it means making u go through the arduous process of trying to care about it. like lmfaooo a bad thing happening shouldnt have to be Ignored until you let it get bad Enough for your standard of trying to stop it. harm prevention is a vital part of human decency and if u just wanna wait till shit rly hurts before being sad about it later, 📣 ur not a good activist 📣

so anyways if u see an ace person celebrating pride this year and wanna pop a vein Maybe run the simple concept through your 2 braincells that truth be told we are not allowed to exist in any positive way literally at all besides the CHANCE of being accepted during lgbt+ pride events. it rly is as simple as; This is all we fucking have, as we gain visibility we only receive more hate and violence, oppression is a complicated system and for oppression to take place at one point in time a group is simply vulnerable and targeted as the system is built against them, so if you dont take the ‘in between’ state of not privileged, not yet oppressed as a mandatory time for intervention to prevent worse harm, you are part of the problem of letting these injustices happen. its basic critical and sympathetic thought to understand that you dont need to be bottom of the barrel oppressed to not just face ‘valid problems’, but ones that Deserve to be corrected. facing prejudice and major constant injustices is... not smth to shrug off and ignore, they are actual problems for the ppl that exist under them and we literally cannot just move past them. and tbh ranking these kinds of things slightly lower and trying to prioritize causes is one thing, but ffs there is literally No moral system that should say ‘well some injustices are ok and ppl should just deal with them theirselves'. expecting ppl to support themselves and get over injustices or stop talking about them for any reason isnt progressive! at all! stop letting ace people be constantly fucking miserable and realize we just want ur fucking help and that our basic emotional responses to injustices isnt cringey(TM) its human, 2k19

#ace discourse #asexual #asexuality #aphobia #ace pride #notice how i had to say 'its that simple' like 3 times despite writing a novel bc exclusionists literally need u to baby talk it out #im so ti red yall pls just see us as people who deserve to not suffer #anyways happy fucking pride month im tired of having to defend why i should be allowed to be happy in any way shape or form #while existing as ace even though i gain literally nothing from it ever and it only seems to make life 10x harder actually :^) #bc chucklefucks like you cant grow up and get over the 'lol virgin' jokes and understand that str8 ppl are dumb and make dumb decisions #but unfortunately! those dumb decisions have major consequences and affect ppl and ignoring it is even dumber somehow! wow! #long post/ / / #neg// //

[tumblunni]

MAN OKAY IM MAKING A SELF INDULGENT KINGDOM HEARTS SONA

Probably the only main reason i havent made another one since i was a kid is cos i never really wanted to be a keyblade master. Even as a kid i always hated "they are just all magically born evil because darkness energy" as a trope. Whenever an evil guy had minions who were all "mindless and evill" and you were supposed to mow them down in droves because of it, i always felt like they seemed LESS evil, yknow? Like youre canonically stating that theyre NOT evil! Theyre dangerous, yeah, but you just said that they dont have complex cognitive thought or ability to choose their own actions. Theyrr just being USED for evil, by the guy whos the real evil! Theyre like guard dogs who were abused into dangerness and if they cant be rehibilitated then its sad, yknow? Poor heartless!! And seriously how can they make them have such cute designs and not expect us to see them that way!!

So yeah i hate that canonically the heartless are all evil and canonically everyone good has to destroy the heartless, like its the entire damn point of a keyblade so i couldnt even touch one without being forced to slay the cutebabs! And KHDDD was great with the long awaited addition of CUTE BABS GOOD GUY MONSTERS YOU CAN HUG, although they were a whole new species of monster and its still canon that heartless are all evil and the equally as annoying canon that all good/remotely sentient Nobodies look like regular humans instead of the cute patoots they once was. THE CUTE PATOOT THAT NEVER WAS!!!! Srsly the low level Dusk is my fave design in the whole series its such a good squiggle boye

OKAY OKAY SO MY POINT IS

If i was gonna make a normal khsona itd have to be either specifically a Dream Eater trainer keyblade weilder whose entire story is about pet raising and none of the fightng evil, or an Organization member because theyre the only sympathetic monsters even if they dont look monstery anymore. Even though obviously rationally my self insert in anything would always be a good guy cos i am a very soft boyo who is too much of a wimp to do the slightest evil. But alas all the best characters are evil and the monsters look so cute aaaa!!

SO OKAY my ULTIMATE self indulgent khsona would be ME AM ANSEM NOW

Me as a heartless researcher who hugs all the heartless and becomes a heartless and then we heartlessly heartfully hug! Cos seriously it is a true fact that i would be a good guy but also if someone came up to me and was like "hey its totally possible to BECOME one of the cute monsters" id be like "oh noooo dammit i guess im evil now" *shrugs in heartless* But i wouldnt really do anything evil i'd just run like.. Old friends senior heartless sanctuary. Just make a big nice house for all my monsters and bake them cakes everyday. I WOULD LEARN TO COOK FOR THEM!!!! So if that makes me evil then i guess i am evil, dammit!! "Oh nooo we dont wanna get our souls stolen and turn into really fabulous cute designs with amazing supernatural powers" well you are WRONG okay. Just my most self indulgent everything idea is just *points at the evilest beastie* im gonna lovv and cherish that! *takes a running leap into a ballpit of Darkballs* SERIOUSLY DARKBALLS ARE SOME OF THE CUTEST AND ALL THEIR ANIMATIONS ARE SO CUTE WHY IS EVERY HEARTLESS SO CUTE AND SO ANIMATED WHY ARE THEY THE MOST DIDNEY THING IN DIDNEY WHY DID THE NEW GAME ADD A HEARTLESS WHOSE JUST A BIG PUDDING WITH A FACE HOW AM I MEANT TO NOT LOVE THAT hhhh

So yeah khsona bunni is some librarian mothafucker who does Deep Darkness Research but is also the nice goofy good guy sort of mad scientist, like the nutty professor or something. I'd probably be the comic relief on some team of actual villains, thats the only way id really be any threat to anyone. But i'd also totally be The Mom Friend and itd be like u guys are having some serious battle and then i call up Mr Big Villain mid battle like HEY YO COME JOIN KARAOKE WITH ME AND THE HEARTLESS and then hes like "damn man can we have a rain check on the whole end of the world thing?"

Like lol another self indulgent oc thing would be "power to be friends with all the fave villains and they are my friend and we hug". Like an all star teamup of just specifically all bunni's fave KH and didney villains and then also they never fight anyone and we just enjoy slice of life friendship antics. Like Kuja and Ursula would be so cool!! Cos theyre both similar personality yet Kuja had experience manipulating a more loser-y lady who looked a lot like ursula so i can expect he'd underestimate her and try his queen brahne plan again and maybe get outsmarted? And maybe theyd be locked in an eternal battle of two masterminds trying to manipulate each other and along the way they somehow end up accidentally forming a mentor student or mom and son relationship? Like ursula is the better version of garland and she helps kuja heal from his childhood trauma and also in the process maybe he helps her heal from whatever ambiguous backstory event led to her being ostracized from her royal family and such. THEY WOULDNT BE BAD IF THEY HAD HUGS OK let me believe this!! And also of course theyre both the big gay/trans coded dramatic fashion person from their respective stories, so srsly there could be so much awesomeness from the combination of The Two Most Stylish Of Two Worlds! Also i wonder how Kuja would even work in a khified version? Like maybe terra still exists as a separate world in kh world rules and it has a plan to destroy and take over gaia in the same way as the original ff9. Or maybe take some of kuja's other plot points and go from there? Like with how he disguised himself as a treno noble and how he eas created by garland to be an "angel of death", maybe in this world he's a shapeshifter Nobody assassin who infiltrates different worlds and corrupts important people to help garland destroy them? But since he's a very complex experiment and complex = humanoid in this universe, it could be an excuse for him becoming sentient over time and having a plot similar to repliku wanting to be a real human. And i dunno maybe zidane is his "brother" because he's the heartless made from the same original dead guy, who was discarded as a failed experiment? Like it could be interesting to see both of them as villains on the same side, and actually have a close relationship as loving brothers. And theres even already a monkey type heartless! And i dunno maybe the plot of garland creating the genomes infiltrator heartless and then kuja going on to create black mages still black mages? Like he still makes Vivi cos seriously its SO WEIRD that the heartless are based on black mages and then of all things they decided that Vivi would be the ONLY ff9 character allowed to appear in the whole kh series and itd just be in the role of "normal human kid". But they didnt even change his design!! He still looks like a heartless!! Why does nobody question why fredbob mcnormalson doesnt have a face!! So itd make much more sense if he was still a heartless and he's just a good one who wants to be a real boy BUT COS THE WORLD SAYS ALL HEARTLESS ARE EVIL I CANT HAVE THAT. Theyre all evil and only extra evil people get to be humanoid types! Boooo! So kuja doing Special Experiment Science could explain there being at least one special heartless thats not evil. And i dunno, kuja sends vivi out on his first test mission to infiltrate and destroy twilight town but whoops instead he becomes everyone's favourite baby brother! Like he's about to devour some dude's soul and then seifer and co come in and yell at the victim like DUDE ARE U BULLYING THIS POOR TINY CHILD and they drag off this poor very confused heartless in a hug and now he's Lost Forever I Guess. Kuja: damn he tasted icecream i'll never get him back!

Look ok i really like Villains Who Are Not Bad and i will constantly make Villains Who Are Not Bad and nothing will ever be better than Villains Who Are Not Bad

My khsona is Good Heartless who hugs Good Heartless in a team of Good Heartless and also brings in other cameo characters to become Good Heartless ok yes the end hell yea hugs n such

TYHE BEST OCS IS HUGS OCS OK

[louisysl]

so my brother left for the army today.. it’s mandatory for men in finland, and you serve 6-12 months depending on various things, most though serve the full twelve months.

i’m really scared. it’s so fucking weird. i drove him to the bus stop and on my way back, alone, i felt so unsettled. even though i only just had dropped him off. and i miss him, even though i saw him eight hours ago. i think it’s mostly just knowing for at least six months, i’ll only see him a couple times a month.

that probably doesn’t even sound so bad, and trust me, my feelings were very different when my older brother left for a year. in fact it was a relief, as it meant there’d be one less abuser in the house. i wasn’t close to him, either, so even if he hadn’t been abusive, i doubt it would’ve been a big deal, at least in a negative way.

and i realise that, sadly, many siblings aren’t that close. in fact rather few are as close as my little brother and i; he’s my best friend, my Person, my favourite human being. we’ve been called twins our whole life, not because we look alike, are twins, or are even of the same age, but because we’ve always been incredibly close. closer than most siblings are, and i feel so incredibly lucky to be able to say that.

for nearly twenty years i’ve seen him every day, only exceptions being some odd weeks here and there, and my stay at the mental institution (during which i did still get to see him a couple if not a few times a week). and to go from being able to walk three steps to see him every day, to only being able to text or call and then see him once or twice a month is so, so weird. i don’t know.

i’ve been ignoring this, because that’s how i deal with everything. i just pretend it’s not happening, as if that’s actually going to make the problem go away, but of course, at one point or another you’re going to have to face the reality of the situation.

we’re only hours into this thing, and i’ve already had so many instances where i’ve felt his absence. i think of something, see something, hear something, and i wanna go tell him about it, talk about it, maybe just say something in passing, but i can’t. he’s not in his room, and he’s not even coming home later today.

i’m scared, too, mainly because anything violent scares me. guns scare me. don’t even get me started on the war. and it’s my lil brother. i’m worried when he drives alone, i get worried when he goes to the store alone and takes longer than i thought he would, i worry about him a lot and very easily. i don’t really show it to him as the last thing i would wanna do is let my worry dictate his actions. obviously he’s nearly twenty and fully capable of taking care of himself, and the chances of anything happening to him are so slim and on top of it all, it’s just part of life. it’s risky and scary. and he’s the most important person to me so obviously he’s the one i worry most about. but i want him to live his life and do what he wants and the only time i’ll allow myself to show my worry is simply by asking him to text me or the family group chat once he’s arrived home from driving alone, should nobody be home to make sure he’s okay. and that feels relatively reasonable, in fact even my parents would ask as much from him.

i do know he’s going to be okay and i in fact think he might even enjoy this experience. i’m so excited for him to make friends and have these experiences. every guy i’ve talked to that has done this, has told me it’s an experience they appreciate and are glad they had, but wouldn’t necessarily want to have again. also, it helps you become more independent and includes lots of exercise and important life lessons, so all in all, it’s a pretty great thing when viewed from that perspective.

i’m also scared, because for the first time in my life, i’ll live alone with my abusive parents. i’ve always been the one they’ve been harshest on, even more so since my big brother moved away. it’s not even something that’s just in my head, as my little brother would tell you the same thing, and he’s certainly not afraid to disagree with me and often even sides with my parents or remains neutral. i actually really appreciate that about him, and i’m so grateful he has a strong mind and confidence like that.

and, like, it’s scary to live with two people who are supposed to not only take care of you but love you. neither of those apply here.

i got a call last week from somebody who works with the social services, as i’m getting help from, i guess, what’s essentially the child protective services for young adults, and the lady told me they’re going to have available apartments soon, in the city i work in no less. i’m going to have an interview with her on tuesday and i have no clue what to expect or what my chances are but i’m praying, praying so god damn hard this is it. i need to move out, i do, and this is the first time since six months ago when i started this process that any progress has been made.

this is gonna be a year with big changes, that much is obvious.. my lil brother going to the army is the first one, and from what i can foresee, the second biggest change (moving out and living on my own is going to be really fucking weird and hard and new, and going to bring a lot of challenges of its own). 

it’s just.. no matter how bad it’s gotten at home, i’ve always had him here. usually he’s (unfortunately) been present in the situation and i don’t have to explain shit and i can just, yknow, talk it out. get support. perspective. all that shit i do need. and even more so, there was a period of years during which the only reason i didn’t kill myself was his existence and while it’ll always remain a good enough reason to endure anything, it’ll be harder to hold onto without him here. yknow?

i just. there’s nobody that comes even close to him. not even close. no one ever has nor will anybody ever. and i realise i may sound really dramatic to anyone who doesn’t have a sibling or person they’re as close with as i am with him but god, none of this is exaggerated. yknow. it’s just. i. i feel so unsettled this is so god damn weird and every second that i’m not distracted, i feel so out of place. like a piece of me is missing and he’s, yknow, he’s alive and just a text or a phone call away (even if he’s going to have very little time to answer either, but still), but it is just. i miss him.

i miss him even when i spend a night away, or we’re too busy and don’t get to spend time together or even see each other for a day or couple of days. and it’s always been relatively easy to cure because even getting to exchange a few words helps.

also like. i always go to the grocery store with him ‘cause it’s an errand we both need to run regularly and it’s a great excuse for us to do something productive as well as spend time and catch up. now i have to do those alone and it’s gonna be so weird.

and even after the six months to a year, i’ll likely, hopefully, have moved out and it’ll never be the same again, yknow. obviously i’m always gonna keep in touch with him and i know we’re gonna remain just as close, but it’s just gonna be so different and i’m getting really emotional thinking about it because it’s never gonna be so easy again, it’s never gonna be just a walk through two doors a couple meters apart.

i. i know he’s gonna be okay. i’ll also be okay, we’ll be okay, we are okay. but it’s a massive change and one i haven’t wanted to face, one i’ve seen coming for a long time but never wanted to even think about.

#x #i miss him so much

[isaacathom]

oh dude the funnest part about this whole Stanton-Zhang family is that when Rhia is like, legally revealed to not be Rhia.

the police (possibly international, idk) are questioning the family, figuring out if this is some sort of identity fraud. like ‘Patrick Stanton, are you aware of a woman claiming to be your daughter by your first wife?’ ‘Rhia? yea.’ ‘well, is she?’ ‘uh, no. but she is like family to us.’ ‘wait, what. so youre in on it?’ ‘oh, yea! my sister in law Bronwyn and her family brought her over for a holiday and we had a long discussion about her situation and how we could help. we offered to have her fill that role’ ‘soo.... you DONT have a daughter by your first wife?’ ‘nope.’ ‘........ so shes just a fake person?’ ‘pretty much? but she is functionally family. we adopted her in all but legal terms’ ‘...........’

the police are very confused, needless to say. they go to Bronwyn and Jun. ‘so, uh, the fucks up with Rhia?’ ‘well, Jun found her knocked out in the Team base and took her with him to ensure she was safe-’ ‘wait he took her?’ ‘well, yes, i didnt know if someone would come back for her and was worried she’d end up badly injured as a result of that wait time, or that she might wake up alone and get lost in the desert’ ‘.... right.... go on’ ‘so we took her home and looked after her and she explained her situation, being an orphan and basically relying on that Elliot fellow-’ ‘the ex elite 4 member?’ ‘yea, that guy. and shes talking about how he left her for dead in the base-’ ‘what?’ ‘youd have to ask Rhia and Elliot. but we heard her story and, well, we’d grown close to her over her time with us, so we thought, maybe we could adopt?’ ‘so then why didnt you?’ ‘welllllllll we were worried Elliot would come looking for her if we properly adopted her, PLUS it had been like, two weeks since she went missing, so if we suddenly appeared with her itd look really bad-’ ‘it already looks pretty bad from here’ ‘we know, sir. so we decided instead of adopting her as Seren, we’d.... yknow..... pull in a favour. work something out so she could stay with us as someone else’ ‘and you used the Team?’ ‘no shit. i mean, i WAS an admin. i basically talked to Dante - that guy you arrested, the big one, not the kid - and we... made arrangements’

‘alright, Seren. the fucks up with this?’ ‘with what?’ ‘this whole ‘Rhia Stanton’ thing.’ ‘oh. well, i was staying with Elliot for a few days, a sort of field trip from the orphanage, go fight some gyms sorta deal. and Elliot had that Team raid, and i begged to come along, so i ended up going. and when we got in, we got jumped by a team of grunts. after a scuffle, i managed to free Elliot, at which point he.... yknow.... fucking bolted.’ ‘what’ ‘oh, sorry, he fled like a coward, better?’ ‘.....’ ‘and then the grunts beat me up. woke up in Juns house, he explained stuff, i stayed with them awhile, rest is history’ ‘miss, thats what we want to know’ ‘well, ok. at this point id been missing arrroooouuund two weeks, and Elliot had been blatantly lying about the circumstances. BLATANTLY. saying oh, he left me in bed and went to the raid and i was gone in the morning, fat lot of shit-’ ‘miss’ ‘so i thought, i cant trust him. but if i go to the police, ill probably have to confront him, and id probably lose in the public opinion, because ~everyone~ trusts in Elliot, and they wouldnt trust me.’ ‘are you sure?’ ‘well, at the time, definitely. with hindsight, maybe not. at the time, i was positive dealing with him would be more trouble than it was worth, and thatd he’d basically never leave me alone if i reappeared. and i... didnt want to see him again, yknow? so, i talked to Jun and Bron and their daughter Lyndelle, trying to figure something out.’ ‘and thats when you concocted this Rhia Stanton thing?’ ‘oh, no, that came a little later. see, the family had already planned, for a while, a trip to Unova to see some other family. and they thought, ok, theyll bring me along, and theyll discuss it with THEIR family there’ ‘how did you get out of [Victoria]? you didnt have a passport’ ‘uhhh. honestly? no fucking clue’ ‘miss’ ‘Jun basically handled it, as far as i know. called in a favour with the Team, yknow, asked them to mock up an id thatd get me to Unova, and then we’d work from there. i dyed my hair, wore big sunhats, off we went! THEN we made up Rhia Stanton’ ‘...........’ ‘what?’ ‘why didnt you go to the authorities?’ ‘given that, at the time, the authorities were the Organisation and i thought they were firmly in Elliots camp, given the whole raid collab thing, i wasnt trusting those fuckers-’ ‘miss’ ‘as far as i could throw them. then, yknow, turned out they were Team, but i didnt know that, and Jun didnt exactly ~tell~ me that at the time. no need, i suppose. was still no guarantee they’d have taken my side. given how EASILY they let go of my case, i fucking doubt it. fiiiirmly in elliots pocket to curry public favour. wasnt having it’

the police come together ‘what the fuck do we do about this?’ ‘well, the family ARE willingly giving up this information AND ‘Rhia’ and Jun are acting as informants on the Team....... we could let this go’ ‘but its like, supppppper illegal’ ‘but they were all in on it. they wanted her to be in their family but didnt want to involve Elliot. remember, he was basically her guardian at the time’ ‘i GUESS? still illegal’ ‘but they ARE informing on proper criminals doing malicious crime, rather than something that at least had good intentions. not like she committed tax fraud. the only people who have touched Seren’s accounts are her family from Johto taking all of her inheritance. doubt ‘Rhia’ has seen a penny of that, somehow’ ‘...... sure, fine, say we let her off. what do we do about the fact she exists twice?’ ‘...... shit’

in the end they end up partially merging the Seren and Rhia files and removing any blatant lies, like her Unovan ancestry. with some tweaking, they legally adopt her to the Stanton family (Patrick and Eira), thus allowing her to keep her illegally gained Unovan citizenship (based on the fact Patrick and Eira were wholly open to the idea of legally adopting her if it would help, and simply didnt because the Org expedited the process through illegal means). they probably remove her Johto citizenship through her ‘mother’ (Patricks first wife), since as Seren, she hadnt gotten that citizenship through descent anyway (given her parents were both Johto natives who renounced and became [Victorians lads]). they basically just wipe it clean. they give her the OPTION of informing her blood family of what happened. she says fucking go for it. publicise it. publicly wrap the case on my disappearance. im not going to seek them out. in the end, her blood family MIGHT seek contact. the only real connection she would have is being able to claim her inheritance from her dead parents BACK from her blood family (who, as you’ll recall, took that inheritance from Seren’s account after she was presumed dead). whether Rhia would actually go for it? no idea. probably couldnt be assed. given shes basically disowned that section of her life, it doesnt really bother her much.

tl;dr the police are really confused by this seemingly good intentioned act of some sort of identity fraud and in the end dont pursue charges and just sorta....... let it go.......... i mean yea she WAS a criminal but it was blackmail/extortion in terms of being in the Team, she was consistently anti-Team, and shes informing on them and helping personally fuck them over, so, like..... if she didnt harm anyone, who cares, lol.

#story blogging #codename seren #long post #uhhhhh i got distracted lol fuck me i have homework to do