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qqueenofhades · 4 years

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Everytime I read "Nicolo di Genova" my brain glitches and I read "Nicolo do Genovia" instead so /whispers/ Kaysanova Princess Diaries AU?

...yes. Did someone say Gay Champagne Romcom? Because that is my Brand.

Nicolò is an Italian-American graduate student living in New York City with his widowed Italian mother and working on an engineering degree at NYU. He was thinking about joining the priesthood for a few years and recently dropped out of seminary and is feeling that Millennial Crisis that all of us know about. He has gone on a few Tinder/Grindr dates, but it’s hard enough to meet someone in this city even when you’re not a gay ex-priest engineering student living in his mother’s rent-controlled apartment in Morningside Heights because have you seen the property prices in New York. Plus WHENEVER he brings a nice boy home, HEY PRESTO there’s his mom waiting eagerly up in the front room, “NICOLÒ WHO IS THIS HANDSOME YOUNG MAN, DOES HE HAVE GOOD PARENTS, IS HE A CATHOLIC NICOLÒ” and of course that instantly kills any kind of romantic mood. Nicolò is like “let’s just go over to yours PLEASE.” But he tends not to see his dates again anyway, and it’s equally depressing, and it’s nice that his mom isn’t homophobic or anything, but he’d like to just meet someone without his mother instantly planning the Big Fat Gay Italian Wedding, and yes he knows this is a nice problem to have but STILL

Anyway, then of course the Dead Dad Circus rolls into town, and Nicolò learns that he’s not actually the son of a nice hardworking Italian immigrant, but of His Serene Highness Prince Domenico Grimaldi of Genovia, who wouldn’t you know it, has recently died too young from cancer and left no legitimate heir except the result of his rebellious teen fling with a cocktail waitress in Capri – which would be, you guessed it, Nicolò. While Nicolò is still processing the horrifying mental image of his mother being a cocktail waitress in Capri and having to look up Genovia on a map, the rest of the royal machine is kicking into overdrive. This involves a very awkward meeting in a very fancy Manhattan hotel with Nicolò’s magnificent but rather out-of-touch royal grandmother, Her Serene Highness The Queen Mother Maria Elisabetta Henrietta Julia Victoria Mignonette Grimaldi of Genovia. She’s basically Julie Andrews because obviously. She informs Nicolò of his Solemn Duty to return to Genovia and become Prince Nicolò and eventually be prepared to take the throne and submit to a fascinating life of minor European royal family ribbon-cutting duties. Oh, and getting married and producing more heirs to the throne, on pain of breaking a thousand-year-old bloodline, though she doesn’t say this out loud. Her loyal right-hand man, driver, and general bodyguard/fixer/man about town, Sebastien le Livre aka Booker, gives Nicolò various sympathetic looks but does not interrupt.

Nicolò obviously freaks out and runs off to call up his best friend at NYU, Andy. Andy is some indeterminate degree of years older than him, in some indeterminable stage of her Classics PhD, and sometimes says weird things like how badly the Library of Alexandria had already been defunded by the Roman emperors before it finally burned, like she was there and holds a personal grudge about it. She is a cranky vodka-drinking lesbian who rides a motorcycle, gets them into periodic scrapes, and understands his shit dating life. She deeply empathizes with all his “I’m not going to run away and leave my life in New York to become part of some creakingly antique regressive imperial monarchic system of racist and homophobic oppression, NO SIR!” Fight the power, Nicolò. Fuck those guys.

Of course, however, Julie Andrews Grandmother Maria prevails and Nicolò is forced to take Prince Lessons, which he hates but tries to be a good sport about, because, well, he’s Nicolò and he’s a good person. He is then whisked off on a private plane to Genovia, because they want to see him in situ before they make a final decision on accepting him as their prince. There of course we have the high-life palaces and parks and snooty clueless aristocrats who look at Nicolò like he’s a prize racehorse and have absolutely zero clue, none, nada, about the real world. Just as Nicolò is about to firmly decide that this is a complete crock of shit and he’s going back to NYU, he meets….

Prince Yusuf “call me Joe” al-Kaysani.

Joe is a minor member of one of the Middle Eastern royal families, some fictional tiny Gulf kingdom that is super SUPER oil rich. He has a title and a lot of money but doesn’t have a clearly defined role in the family, other than that he’s been ordered not to embarrass it. Nicky does not know this when they first meet, but obviously it’s not possible to be an out gay prince in a conservative Arabian-peninsula Islamic kingdom, and therefore the fixers have arranged for Joe to be publicly dating a daughter of the Malaysian sultan, Quynh. (We are making her Malaysian in this instance so she can also be Muslim and hence an appropriate match for Joe.) Except Princess Quynh is also hella lesbian and is getting the same thing out of the fake dating with Joe that he is, i.e. throwing people off the scent of their real selves. They spend their time together in private eating popcorn, commiserating about their lives and crazy royal families and the press invading their privacy, watching romcoms, and Judging the Straights. They’re actually best friends and text each other all the time, so at the royal function where Joe runs into the stiff and nervous and clearly overcompensating New Guy who’s evidently the New Prince of Genovia, and oh my god Q he’s the Most stuck up person I’ve EVER MET, Quynh is the first to hear ALL about it. She immediately suspects that Joe doth protest too much.

Meanwhile, Nicky meets Nile Freeman, another young American (from Chicago, obvs) who is working at some important EU institution currently headquartered in Genovia. They also hit it off and Nile tells Nicky about the things she wants to do to help change the world and why she’s here, and he is moved by her kindness and altruism and remembers that that was what he wanted too, and why he joined the priesthood in the first place. He opens up to her about the shock of learning the truth about his now-dead dad and the crazy whirlwind he’s been sucked into and how he doesn’t know what to do, and their friendship is beautiful and we love it.

Meanwhile, of course, Nicky and Joe keep running into each other and getting on each other’s nerves, Nicky is thisclose to calling up Booker and ordering him to deport Joe because why is he always here (Booker, of course, will eventually become a secret ally in helping them see each other, but that is not quite yet). There is some Shenanigan where they end up both getting into trouble, Grandmother Julie Andrews is not amused, and finally they are forced to sit next to each other for a whole state dinner and Be Polite, because Genovia is trying to forge better relations with Joe’s kingdom. (Genovia is tiny, ancient, and broke, Joe’s kingdom has obviously a ton of money, there are old historical ties between them, some Genovians traveled to the kingdom in the past, Genovia’s trying to improve its human rights record and take in more refugees, etc. Nile is also helping with this last). So Nicky and Joe get ordered to fake a highly convincing bromance and pretend they’ve been best buddies all along (think Red White and Royal Blue) and that means they have to actually learn about each other and spend time together and ugh, he’s a spoiled rich playboy brat, and ugh, he’s a clueless American who thinks he’s better than us, and…

Oh no.

Yes, of course they fall in love, they deny it as hard as they can, Nile and Quynh and Booker are all increasingly exasperated by their attempts to pretend they’re not, and finally they kiss and make love and admit their feelings and that they want to be together. Then of course they get outed by some scheming evil cabinet minister (Merrick) who doesn’t want Nicky to become king and disapproves of him dating (gasp) a MUSLIM WHO IS ALSO A MAN, and there’s a huge scandal and a ton of drama and the usual Romcom Breakup Angst as they decide whether they can still see each other. Andy flies out to Genovia to comfort Nicky, Booker has a Word With The Queen, and Joe hides in his room until Quynh (along with Nile, who she’s met and hit it off with) appears to tell him that he has to be brave, she’ll help.

Anyway, etc etc., Drama, “I love him no matter what, if you don’t accept him you don’t accept me and your STUPID BLOODLINE CAN CHOKE” speeches from Nicky, Julie Andrews sees the light, they decide that Nicky and Joe can keep seeing each other, and it’s all rather sweet. There’s a lot of public relations to be managed and whether Joe’s family is going to disown him and what this will mean for the whole international relations thing, but… one thing at a time.

Nicky agrees to become Prince of Genovia as long as he can be with Joe, Joe decides that hey, he likes Nile too and there’s plenty of meaningful work to be had here and the three of them can join forces to do good things and he’s going to stay, and the Genovian public obviously comes around and loves them. Nobody can find Princess Quynh. It’s rumored she ran off to America with a cranky vodka-drinking PhD student of indeterminate age and was last seen on the back of a motorcycle heading west.

Everyone lives happily and gayly ever after.

The End.

#the old guard fanfiction #joe x nicky #kaysanova #anonymous #ask

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malfoygrass · 3 years

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I never talk about an ot3 for Draco and Astoria, so...I interrupt my regular programing to talk about my first ot3 Headcannon for Draco and Astoria and Harry. Because I figured if Draco and Astoria ever decided to go in that direction, Harry would be 100% there with them.

Hear me out:

At first they don’t have anything in common, there’s Harry who feels so out of place in a world that practically worships him that it’s funny. Draco who’s coming to terms with the fact that he needs to change his old ways and Astoria, the morally ambiguous girl who was suffocated by her family's hypocrisy and refused to let Draco wallow in self pity.

Astoria was trying to run away from home when she accidentally found Draco hiding in her train compartment, they're not even friends, just two perfectly sad people who feel better together than apart after the battle of Hogwarts. But they run away together, because he's an ex death eater and she's a broken pureblood, both trying figure out how to build up their lives from scratch, now that Voldemort is dead.

Just two halfway rebellious teens trying to make sense of a present in which they are called adults. (Astoria refuses to call herself or Draco blood traitors, since there was nothing to betray in the first place)

And that’s how they find Harry Potter, in between house hunting in Muggle London, shopping in muggle malls, Draco's panic attacks out over his dark mark and the hallucinations of her survival guilt. they find Harry Potter, who goes to the same cafe each afternoon and also has a lost look in his eyes that Astoria is familiar with. Harry who for reasons of his own also wanted to run away from a world that doesn't really see him. Harry who feels alone after losing so much and yet finds peace in his own company.

So being the person she is, Astoria invites him over to Draco’s new muggle house for posh tea and crap takeout and when the night is over and the mutual apologies are exhausted. Draco tells Harry he's welcome to stay in his guest room whenever he wants.

Astoria's presence is a joy to find comfort in, a blank slate of opinions for Harry to talk to, she makes it easy for Harry to adapt to Draco, to understand his former arch enemy and find himself in places he never thought to look. their lifestyle isn't demanding or ambitious. To Harry, it seems like all they want is a quiet place to heal and figure out who they are, before the future Lord Malfoy and the youngest Greengrass heiress, can assert their true voices in Magical Britain again, and so he stays... because he needs to figure that out too.

Harry teaches Draco how to use a coffee maker and discovers a new appreciation for every old museum in the UK. Once Astoria learns to sew clothes with magic, Harry and Draco find themselves in too many fancy suits for their liking and being made to judge between all her dresses. They visit all the dance clubs Harry ever wanted to try. Draco proves to be an excellent dancer in every type of muggle music much to Harry's amazement, while Astoria makes them both laugh whenever she tries.

Harry exhausts himself teaching Draco and Astoria about the joy in the simple things of life. While Draco and Astoria try to convince Harry that using money to make life easier is the Muggle version of magic. And the thing is that, the three of them don’t notice when love comes into the mix.

Sure Astoria likes Draco, he’s dramatic and stoic and he’s the closest thing she knows to a mirror, he can read her entire volumes of pretentious books and never gives in to her whining when she’s sick, and she likes Harry, because he’s funny and down to earth and a fierce protector over the people he loves, which includes her, she knows Draco enjoys it, she enjoys it too, how Harry makes them feel safe. She likes them both and they are attractive and she knows they like each other so it’s okay to love them like a friend, until it’s not. (And she doesn't know what to do)

And sure Draco likes Astoria and Harry, Astoria because she’s soft and forgiving and she’s got hope enough for the two of them and he’s pretty sure she’d support him even if he turned into a monster and Harry because he’s Harry and past history aside, Harry is just as forgiving as Astoria, he doesn’t put up with Draco’s moods and he gives as good as he gets, Draco likes Harry’s raw honesty, his sarcasm, his sense of humor, if Astoria feels like home, then Harry feels like adventure without leaving home, they both make him happy, Harry and Astoria know enough about muggle culture to lose themselves in London with him, pulling him out of his shell and tag teaming his defenses until he gives in, he is happy to have them both, until he wants more (but he doesn't know how to tell them he wants them both)

And Harry, well he feels like Draco and Astoria are a perfect combination of kindness and spite. He likes Astoria, probably more than he should, given that she’s the archetypal white princess to Draco’s black prince, she’s understanding and patient, warm, mischievous and strong in her fragility, and Harry has never met someone who can speak about caring for one’s enemies like Astoria does, she’s simply the kind of girl who brings comfort wherever she goes and Draco, Harry has learned to like Draco, underneath the pretentious idiocy, there’s actually a good person. Draco is mean, and stubborn, but he’s also smart, ingenious, terribly generous and stupidly indulgent with people he cares about, which are not many, so Harry likes him. They are both more innocent than they should, too prone to overspending, he always feels like they don't know enough of the Muggle world to avoid being swindled, he finds it endearing, and it’s okay to be their friend, until it’s not (he knows he's inlove, but nobody's ever told him it's okay to love two people at once)

It starts when Astoria's nightmares return. Dreams of dead people blaming her for surviving the carnage that make her scream herself awake, Usually Draco is used to awkwardly climbing in her bed and soothing her until she falls back asleep. But this time Harry gets there first and he's much better at it than him (Astoria responds better to Harry's reassurances than she does to Draco's). So Draco lets her calm down in Harry's arms untill she's well enough turn around and seek Draco's more stable and familiar presence.

It's a dynamic that neither Harry or Draco mind, much to Astoria's embarrassment. Truth be told the three of them have nightmares, but only Astoria is held and cuddled by the two of them anytime she so much as whimpers in her sleep. So when Harry wakes up in cold sweat and pretends to be checking up on Astoria only to find that Draco had the same idea, they don't make a big deal out it.

Because Harry has PSTD episodes almost as often as Draco and turning the house into a safe place to heal is what they've been trying to do since the beginning.

Harry needs Draco to remind him how to act normal and sarcastic and he needs Astoria to soothe him into a state of calm. Draco knows they need each other a little bit more at night, and Harry thinks it's nothing to be ashamed of. So Draco isn't. Astoria is weak, Harry is a protector and Draco is a provider. Aside from falling inlove with a classmate's little sister, It's natural to be so close with the boy who used to be your school rival...right?

Astoria's room becomes neutral ground. It eventually gets filled with Harry's things and Draco's things of course. After all her room was meant to be the biggest anyway (Since Draco in all his sexist assholery thought Astoria owned a wardrobe as big as his mother's so she should have the biggest closet) besides it's saves them all time to have Draco's hair products on hand instead of going trough all the trouble of stealing them from his room

Eventually Draco's room turns into an office for Harry and the guest room becomes the potions lab Draco always wanted....

Aaand after a few months of living together, healing together and learning to fit in the muggle world. They decide it's time to go back to face the magical world and their responsibilities.

It turns into a panicked discussion about everything their families and friends are going to expect from them once they rejoin the real world, and in a true Griffindoor fashion Harry makes the first move and tells them he wants to stay together.... But romantically, because at least he is trying to be brave cue the two emotionally constipated Slytherins admitting their feelings.

So there's a lot of talking and more than some kissing involved in that whole emotional confession time. They decide that if they are going to be together then it's going to be them against the world and thats going to be an uphill battle but they're willing to, if it's with the other two.

And yeah that's how I imagine an Ot3 between Draco Harry and Astoria would go

Ps: could someone tell me what this ship is called? Drastroriary? Drarryoria? Haroriaco?

#Drastoria #astoria greengrass #draco malfoy #Harry Potter #draco x Astoria x harry #ot3 <3 #ot3 au

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doorsclosingslowly · 3 years

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Someone, Broom in Hand

Kaz died before he turned sixteen. That’s the story. When he reappears, it’s at the side of the Dark General, wearing the thin fluttering robes of the Sun Summoner. Jesper travels to the Little Palace to punch his fucking teeth out.

Kaz[/&]Jesper | 7.5k | content note: nonlinear narrative, past and offscreen abuse

The purple kefta is too big for Kaz. Jesper doesn’t want to think about why he dumped his coat over Kaz’ head, except that Kaz looks weird and cold in his ugly fancy yellow paper taffeta shirt, his one layer that he’s wearing apart from the underpants that leave his knees bare.

That he looks uncomfortable at all should be nothing but a trick of the violent light: there are two separate lit fireplaces in the bedroom, so awkwardly placed that they were probably retrofitted by a Fabrikator. It might have been David, though then Jesper would surely have heard a treatise on the stones used to erect the Little Palace, or Gaz, or Lizaveta or any of the other Materialki Jesper’s been bunking with but—but anyway, if Kaz felt like wearing more, he could order an attendant to fetch another shirt or two. Unless there’s nothing he owns that isn’t thin and revealing and fucking yellow. Unless he’s not allowed… Unless he can’t even dress himself anymore without a gaggle of attendants. Man moves up in the world and forgets everything he knew: tale as old as time.

“Just like you forgot us,” Jesper mutters, less viciously than he should.

The Kaz-doll makes no comment. No protest. No further manipulation of Jesper’s old affections. No snide mockery for Jesper passing his kefta on to the man that less than an hour ago, he tried to kill.

He just pulls the coat on. With his odd bare fingers—no claws after all, just thin and human—he closes button after button, including the top four that Jesper’s never once used, struggling to pull the material over the bone-tines sticking out of his chest. (And who back home would believe that Dirtyhands has ordinary fingers and a totally fucked up chest?) It would be easier to leave it open, but Kaz, even now he’s a sunny lapdog, doesn’t do easy. When he drops his arms, the too-long sleeves fall down over his hands, and with his thumbs he traps the fabric there. Sad little improvised half-gloves, more than Jesper’s seen him wear in the month since he let himself get conscripted into the Little Palace. He looks back at Jesper.

There’s no Thank you—Kaz Brekker never knew that word, and it seems in the two years they had him, whatever else they forced on him the Ravkans failed to teach him any more manners—but there is something new in his glare. It’s not just the purple washing the colour off his smooth—his way too smooth face. No. It’s something old: defiant, and angry, and scheming, just barely breaking through the placid paint and the rust beneath it.

Bit by bit, as he buttons up Jesper’s kefta Kaz simultaneously pulls on the moth-bitten coat of Dirtyhands he’s kept way back in the wardrobe of his brain, the ruthless killer, Bastard of the Barrel, Dregs lieutenant and future gang boss unless he gets murdered first. And it didn’t stick the first time. Pulls it over whoever it is that he was before. Over the doll beside Kirigan.

Over that person in the corner, that cornered boy, brittle and alone and stripped of armour and weapon and self, and Jesper wants to kill every single fucker in the Little Palace.

“Back home, you had a plan for everything,” he says instead. “I’m not assuming it’s a B or even a Z or a Q squared, but I know you. I know you’ve considered it. What do we do now your beloved long-lost friend’s shown up to help you steal the Sun Summoner?”

☼

Yesterday, Kerch accepted the terms of the Ravkan crown. Ex-crown. Dark fucking empire. Whatever. Test all children and send the Grisha to the Little Palace, conscript some people into the First Army—though what they still need an army for when they have the Fold is anyone’s guess—send food, booze, and, worst of all to the fastidious greedy Kerch, pay tribute without receiving anything at all in return. It was in the mouth of every paperboy on the streets, every mercher, every gang boss. By Ghezen how could we just surrender? they moaned, and Do you want to end like West Ravka? and Didn’t you see him? Kirigan’s going to crown himself king of everything. He’s unstoppable. And that boy next to him, the Sun—

Honestly? Jesper doesn’t give a fuck anymore. He’s paying fifty kruge just to sit on Inej’s bed for an hour and braid her hair. Ketterdam can burn to the sopping wet ground for all he cares. The world can rot. Like the Dregs did. Like everything Jesper cared for.

Inej, though, watched it.

“I had to see,” she’s whispering into Jesper’s ear, barely moving her miserable red-painted lips even though his hair should block out most lines of sight already. Inej’s smart, though, and desperate: if Jesper keeps returning to the Menagerie as nothing but a smitten small-time gangster with an incredibly vanilla hair fetish, he won’t catch attention. Tante Heleen will have fewer reasons to raise Inej’s rates. Jesper can barely pay for a visit a month as it is, and even those he allows himself mostly because he’s given up the hope of ever paying off her indenture unless he wins big.

“I snuck out yesterday. I had to see. Heleen got a new girl from Ravka six months ago, and she believes, too. Had a cheap pamphlet with her, last thing she had, of the new Saint. The illustrations… they looked just like Kaz.”

“Fu—” Inej elbows him. Jesper presses his lips into the braid over her ear. “Forget about Kaz Brekker. You’re the only one who matters now. He died, and you ended up here.”

She’s trapped in the Menagerie now because Kaz disappeared into the harbour like so many orphans before him; because he didn’t tell Jesper jack shit about Inej’s situation that might have helped him keep her safe in the Dregs; because he allowed senile Haskell who knows the names of all his five hundred thousand miniature boats and literally nothing else to stay in charge of the Dregs instead of killing him as soon as possible, which allowed Haskell to let the payments for Inej’s indenture lapse, which meant three months after Kaz just disappeared from his life Jesper got back to the Slat to find that Inej, too, had gone without a trace, and it was only luck and a pervert old Dreg that Jesper soon afterwards ‘accidentally’ shoved off a roof talking about the girls at the Menagerie that meant he found her again. Found her, only to realize he can’t help her at all.

Inej pulls Jesper’s ear back to her mouth. “I saw him, Jesper. I saw Kaz. Kaz is alive. He was there. I saw him.”

“You what?!” A sharp elbow darting out of her red sad nightgown that would have slipped right in-between his ribs if it was one of the knives she still mourns, and he’s not even given anything away. Heleen’s a hell bitch, but what use would she get out of random surprise?

“I saw Kaz. He’s the Sun Summoner. I was far away but—it was Kaz, standing next to General Kirigan, holding his hand, when the Merchant’s Council signed the terms of surrender. It was Kaz. I’m certain. Sankt Kaz.”

“I—” Jesper burrows his face into Inej’s hair. “You didn’t happen to have a knife on you, did you? A really tiny one she couldn’t confiscate. A super lethal one. Might never get as good a chance again.”

“Jes—”

“Fuck him sideways with a rusty shovel. That traitor. Did you forget how you ended up here? He left us. Saw a bigger pile of cash and skedaddled, I bet. He always wanted to be king. Guess becoming the Darkling’s queen was the next-best option.”

Inej doesn’t even defend Kaz. Jesper pulls away from her so he can look at her face. She always looks sad these days, unless she has specific painful orders to perk up, but it’s deeper now. She’s not doing the gesture, not holding her hand against her chest. Faith, now, is just one more thing Kaz Brekker took from her. Jesper can’t blame her, even though he never believed. Not even when Ravka’s new ‘Sun Summoner’ started gaining them the whole continent. Power’s power, though, no matter whether the stories around it are true. If Kaz truly is the Sun Summoner, then it’s not just Kaz Brekker who sent her back to the Menagerie—but one of her Saints. Fucking asshole.

He buries Inej in his arms. It’s all he can do now, to hold her until this month’s hour is up, because it’s not like he can just murder the Ravkans special weapon in retribution, can he? Can…

“This changes nothing,” he whispers. “The only priority is still paying off your indenture. Kaz quit the Dregs. He left us, and that means he’s nothing now. Less than nothing. I have a good feeling about the Makker’s Wheel at the Emerald Palace this weekend. Lots of pigeons there for the ‘Fete of Unity with Mother Ravka’ or whatever, and the minder thinks I’m hot. It’s risky, of course, but if I do this right—”

☼

Jesper’s just about to crawl right back out from under the bed—weapons raised, since hell knows what Kaz was planning back there, and fuck Jesper for apparently still harbouring enough trust in the guy to follow his lead two years after he deserted—but then, a series of clicks and rumbles heralds the opening of the door. Footsteps, and it slides shut again.

Shit, that was close.

And Kaz wasn’t bluffing, after all. Well, well… it certainly means something that Kaz, beloved Saint and Sun Summoner and ally to the Darkling, just told his attempted murderer slash old friend and-or stooge to hide. Kaz never did anything without a motive, be it profit or power or vengeance, and even this degraded, polished version surely isn’t so far gone as to engage in ideas as base as altruism. Ergo, Kaz will want to use Jesper for—something, though what is there he wants when he’s basically a prince of—but he isn’t, is he? He’s in a cell. A cell Jesper can unlock.

Three pairs of footsteps move around the room. One of them might be Kaz, but without his limp, it’s hard to recognize him. None of them says a word, which… it probably means this is a routine visit. Whatever’s going on, they all know their role.

Two pairs stop moving, while the third one—circles around them, it sounds like, and then someone else stumbles a little and catches themselves. Jesper hopes they’ll hurry up. He’s in mortal danger, technically—Kaz can still choose to reveal the intruder inside the Sun Summoner’s private room and-orprison, but, prison. Jesper’s far more useful alive, and so, hiding under the bed is fucking boring.

There’s not even anything interesting in-between the slat frame and the mattress. It’s the only place where you could hide anything—that Jesper can think of, at least, but there’s just nothing there at all, and Kaz used to be a real magpie. It’s a gaping void, just like everything else in this room. Like everything else in this palace, a chasm painted over with gilt and power. Unless—something’s stuck to the underside of a cross brace. Jesper slides a fingernail under the edge, and it comes loose easily enough. Not exactly a cache worthy of Dirtyhands, and anyway, it’s just a… a mangled piece of paper. A paper that looks like it’s been chewed on and spat out—and an entire corner actually torn off, or bitten, maybe—and whatever used to be printed onto it mostly rubbed off except for a couple of letters here and there, RAV. Curved lines and tiny hats. What would Kaz need to hide in his room? Apart from weapons he doesn’t have. Other people’s jewellery, dito. The only thing that Jesper knows about him now is that he’s trying to open the door. Trying to leave. It’s probably a map, then.

Which means an escape is planned, and Jesper’s just providing the desperately sought means. Good. That means he should have even more leverage here.

Somebody stumbles again, this time taking two steps to catch themselves. Almost as if they’ve jerked away.

“You’re falling behind,” slimes the smooth, rich voice of the Darkling. “On second thought, our people would miss you at the celebration. I’ll inform the staff that you wish to dance, all night long.”

☼

“You’re hanging around here because you heard that General Kirigan and the Sun Summoner are due back this hour, aren’t you?” The woman in a tidemaker’s kefta that just sidled up to Jesper speaks unaccented, high class central Ravkan. Even if her dark skin is an indication of Zemeni heritage, she came to the Little Palace long before the Darkling’s recent territorial acquisitions. She’s no ally, just like the rest of the crowd that surrounds them: an old-school Grisha, veteran Second Army, not someone whose loyalties may yet be pliable. Not someone like Jesper, whose skin started crawling the moment he showed his skills to a Ravkan occupation officer so he could sneak into the Little Palace. She’s friendly, though, and looks at Jesper’s face with clear appreciation. “You must be new. Hi. I’m Nadia.”

“Jesper,” he says, throwing a flirtatious grin like a blanket over his nerves and anger. It’s almost fun, playing the suave infiltrator assassin Grisha. Except Inej’s still in the Menagerie. And Kaz is still a piece of shit. “Yeah, I just got here! They didn’t test for Grisha ability in Novyi Zem when I was little, so I barely knew who I was… but once I heard about the Darkling, about this place, I crossed the True Sea as soon as I could!”

“That must have been so hard. So lonely. This place is…” She grimaces. “This place was our sanctuary. You’re lucky you’re Materialnik.”

“Why?” It’s the first time since his arrival that anyone’s had even a neutral opinion of Durasts, let alone good, and granted, it’s not like he cares that much about the ability his Ma died from, and he’s only talked to a dozen people since arriving yesterday, but…

“Listen, I know you want to see the Sun Summoner, and don’t tell anyone I said this but…” Nadia pulls Jesper a few paces away from the crowd on the training grounds, into a corner formed by two enormous bales of hay. Well-chosen: he can barely see the crowd that just surrounded them peek out behind the yellow stalks. “You’re sweet—”

“Listen, you’re gorgeous, but we just met—although, on second—”

“No!” She laughs, but it’s bitter. “You’re cute, but no. It’s my duty, to her, to protect you. The new ones. You’re Materialnik, so you’re not combat, so you’re not going to actually meet the Sun Summoner. Ever, if you’re lucky.”

“He’s that bad?” Kaz was always a dick, if Jesper’s honest—it was part of his charm—he was just a charming magnetic one, and back with the Dregs Jesper hated his ruthlessness just as much as he admired it. He was worst to his fellow Dregs and his enemies, though: he could charm a mark when needed. So it’s a tad unexpected that Kaz earned himself the hatred of a Grisha indoctrinated from childhood to see him as her Saint and saviour. Apparently, he’s just that talented. That obnoxious.

Well, Jesper’s not complaining. That makes his plan much easier.

“He killed my best friend,” Nadia whispers urgently. “The last time I saw her they were taking a walk, and then I found her, blisters and burns all over her body. Who else? There’s a reason he’s not allowed to have weapons. I heard the Darkling doesn’t let him go anywhere alone, or he would murder us all. He killed Baghra too, I’m sure—she was our teacher, but she disappeared two years ago. Just stay away from him, alright? He looks harmless, but he’s a rabid dog. Oh. There he comes.”

Jesper barely manages to whisper, “Thank you,” before she pulls away from him and returns to her previous place. Back to the crowd of Etherealki and Corporalki on the training field, but she finds her place in the last row, standing—hiding—behind two men much taller than her.

Jesper follows into the crowd. No need to alert Kaz that the past is hot on his heels, and then—

Well. There he is.

There someoneis, anyway.

If Jesper trusted Inej just a hair’s breadth less, he’d have cursed her and sneaked back out of the Little Palace the second he sees the person holding General Kirigan’s hand. Sure, the Sun Summoner is male, with dark brown hair and dark eyes and pale skin, and just a little bit taller than Kaz was at fifteen, but that’s where the similarities end. Dirtyhands had his impeccable mercher’s suits in a grim mockery of Ketterdam’s upper class, and gloves to feed the rumours, and a cane to walk and kill. His hair managed to be at once floppy and severe; just like his gaunt face, in the right light, made him look utterly captivating and not just like an annoyed scheming rat. He looked exactly like the Bastard of the Barrel should. Not pleasant or easy, but the person Jesper once would have followed into any lion’s den.

This—this Sun Summoner, on Kirigan’s arm, is beautiful. Healthful. Pristine.

Barely even a fucking person.

It’s the face, mostly.

You could never tell what Kaz was thinking, just looking at him, because he was, after all, thinking in layers upon layers of incomprehensible schemes at all times of the day and then went to bed and dreamt about ploys and deceptions. Jesper could barely follow him the three times total he deigned to explain part of his plans. But you could always tell that Kaz was thinking. Planning, scheming, plotting his greedy bloody vicious way out of and into every possible house on every possible street.

The Sun Summoner looks empty. He’s staring straight ahead, but he’s not even doing thatwith any kind of purpose. He’s like a pet on the Darkling’s arm. He looks more airheaded than all blackout drunk heirs and heiresses in Ketterdam combined.

It’s incredibly eerie, because now he’s searching for it Jesper can sort of read Kaz Brekker back into the Sun Summoner’s face. This face is much smoother, without the marks of past firepox, plumped and rosy-tinted, but that might partially just be a testament to the quality of Ravkan cooks—or, how skint the Dregs always were. He has a normal haircut. It probably suits him better, unless your standard for beauty is Dirtyhands, and unfortunately Jesper—anyway. The Sun Summoner doesn’t have a cane, either, and he doesn’t need one, apparently, because he isn’t limping. Ravkan royal healthcare, but honestly, Kaz could have pressed a Grisha healer into service back in Ketterdam only he always insisted—well, whatever. Fuck his words of wisdom. Fuck him. Fuck Kaz. Jesper shouldn’t even be remembering that snake.

Kaz Brekker betrayed Inej, left her to rot in the Menagerie, so whatever role he’s playing right now in whatever scheme this is—because it has to be a scheme that put Kaz into the yellow robe he’s in right now, so thin it’s translucent, and sleeveless too in the Ravkan winter. The Dregs tattoo on his arm is gone. Two Inferni are flanking him and the Darkling, their hands perpetually on fire just so Kaz can parade about in a robe no Menagerie slave would go outside in, but still, it’s Kaz. It’s definitely Kaz Brekker. Jesper can see it now.

Fuck him. He traded the Dregs for this. He abandoned them to Haskell’s mismanagement and let Inej go back to the Menagerie. He betrayed them all.

(Of course, Jesper abandoned Inej now too, and without a word, but—after that last catastrophic loss in the Emerald Palace, there’s a zero percent chance the Dime Lions wouldn’t have strung him up by his own entrails—or sold him into indenture, trying to make back at least a fraction of the fifty thousand kruge he owes—so really, he had no choice. It’s the next best thing, right? If he can’t help her anymore, at least he can kill the bastard that started all their troubles.)

Kaz just walks off, hand in the Darkling’s grasp, towards the Little Palace. Carelessly following the other man’s lead.

The old Kaz would have noticed Jesper.

☼

Footsteps and then, a series of clicks and pieces of wood and metal rubbing stones. The door. Kaz’s legs, taking steps backwards to the bed in a perfect, healthy gait. The rich soft creaking of the bed as he sinks down again, and in front of Jesper—the same two muscular, pale, bare, identical hairy calves. Like the legs of a statue, or one of those de Kappels he used to like, except the right leg is trembling finely. Barely noticeable if it wasn’t right in front of Jesper’s face. Those Ravkans maybe aren’t so crafty after all.

Then: nothing.

After what feels like an hour in which Jesper doesn’t dare move, even though the Darkling must have left already, a hand drops off the edge off the mattress. Middle and index finger erect, then crooking twice in quick succession. It takes a moment to connect. Jesper hasn’t seen those signals in such a—move, path clear. Yes. That’s what it was.

Jesper wriggles out from under the bed, annoyingly free of dust. Pristine. Empty, just like everything else.

“Didn’t think the Sun Summoner needed to use our secret code, boss,” he drawls up at Kaz from the floor. Kaz, with his barren black eyes and his new porcelain doll face, picking at the wide open collar of his yellow shirt.

“Never drop a tool you can still use,” Kaz says. A beat. “Didn’t think I was your boss anymore.”

“You aren’t.” Jesper turns his head away, looking at the spotless floor and the intricately painted walls from his low vantage point. Exquisite, imposing, empty: a Saint’s cage, as beautiful and terrible as Inej’s room in the Menagerie. The bare wall hiding the inaccessible door. “That guy really fucking hates you.”

Kaz doesn’t reply. Jesper turns his head back to watch him again, even though that won’t give him anything more: Kaz used to be willfully inscrutable even back in the Barrel, but after whatever Grisha surgery they did to him, there are only traces left of the real person trapped inside him. Dollface, Jesper thinks again. Who’d have expected they’d turn fucking Dirtyhands into a dollface?

It’s Kaz who turns away, fingers clawed into his neckline. His voice is rough, even if it’s a shadow of the damaged rasp that used to be him. “I thought about it sometimes, back then. The first time.”

Every fibre of Jesper’s being wants to interrupt with, What are you talking about? I don’t speak cryptic anymore. I’m out of practice. He should get off the floor, raise his guns, resume—but whatever it is, whether it’s some stupid new Grisha power, whether it’s zowa, or his memory of Kaz is just coming back, he doesn’t—

“It was like this. I was on my bed already, usually, when it grew hard—and I thought you would be up for not being on the bed, and there wasn’t much else in my room. I imagined watching you. I didn’t touch it. That was better.”

Uh. What.

“He probably knows I threw up after we—I tried to hide it. I thought I could manipulate him into seeing me as his partner, I thought I’d healed, that I’d practiced enough—but he just saw that I was still weak. He saw he could control me. But if he didn’t do it again because I threw up, I’m—”

He was right. Jesper would have stayed on the cold hard floor back then for him. Even now, Jesper would crawl around like a worm jerking off for the fucking asshole he got himself trapped in the Little Palace to murder, if that meant Kaz never had to—

Kaz pulls the neckline of his flimsy thin single ugly yellow shirt closed. The shirt that doesn’t protect him. The shirt he didn’t choose.

☼

Jesper’s imagined the Sun Summoner’s quarters, of course. Most of the Grisha in the Little Palace are wretched gossips—or Jesper’s been charming as many people into spilling as many secrets as possible to him so he can plan his attack, same difference—and anyway, he needs a backdrop for his imagined kill shots. It’s Kaz Brekker, after all. Dirtyhands. The ex-Bastard. You’d want to rehearse that death. Think of some witty one-liners.

Nadia said it was gorgeous inside, like a dollhouse. Lizaveta, who Jesper’s been told to shadow so he can learn how to become a proper Durast, insisted it’s totally empty. Grzegorz said there were live kittens inside, so the Sun Summoner could sate his lust for innocent blood, Sayyna thought there was a giant swimming pool, and a lovely naïve boy from the edge of the permafrost up at the former border insisted it was just like the quarters of all other Grisha, except with a little more privacy. Since they’re all siblings fighting for a world that will be kind to Grisha.

Jesper, privately, imagined a few stolen paintings and a mishmash of furniture. Because he’s an idiot.

This is just like—

If it is the Sun Summoner’s bedroom at all. It should be. Jesper did his homework: he followed the Darkling and his Sun Summoner creature that wears the skin used to house Kaz, and a variety of Materialniks, to the end of this specific corridor, five times in total. Watched the Materialniks unlock a hidden mechanism, and then the two most powerful men in Ravka—in all charted countries, ruling everything this side of the True Sea but pockets of Shu Han and even that’s a matter of time—they walked inside, hand in hand. The Darkling always left, after a while, alone, and so it only made sense to assume that the hidden room that Jesper just snuck up to and unlocked is, in fact, the Sun Summoner’s room. Kaz’ room. It’s the best time for breaking into it, too. There’s going to be a party in two days, so hopefully everyone’s too busy, and even if the Sun Summoner’s out doing preparations then Jesper can just hide in here and kill him in an ambush. That’s probably easier, actually.

First, though, he locks and hides the door again, because… yeah, he went to Ravka expecting to get caught. At some point. This is a suicide mission for revenge, after all—suicide is in in the title. But it’s no fun if he gets caught before the gory glorious revenge part. Before Kaz admits he was a piece of shit. Both guns cocked and ready, he turns around, and actually inspects the room he broke into.

No. Nothing changes, even when he blinks and blinks again. That wasn’t a faulty first impression.

The room still looks like a fucking prison cell.

A fancy, clean cell, but a cell nonetheless. It��s empty except for the bed, and Jesper owes Lizaveta more money than he has on him (though to be fair, technically, Jesper’s fifty thousand kruge in debt anyway, so does it really make a difference at all if he’s a few Ravkan coins more in the red), and even the windows—Jesper’s had enough training now that he can look at the windows and see the subtly reinforcing mesh inside the glass. No curtains. No curtain rods. Nothing—there’s a subtle mesh inside the bedclothes too and the frame of the bed looks far too sturdy to be torn apart by anyone who isn’t a skilled Materialnik. There are meshes in front of the fireplaces.

Nothing in here that can be used as a weapon.

Not against others, and not against oneself.

No escape.

There’s nothing in this stark white massive room but a person, acting like he never did before and still looking more like himself than when he was walking through the training grounds. It’s probably the distance from other people. He’s got his back to Jesper and he’s in the furthest corner from the door, which should be a tactical misstep because he can’t escape from there but really—it’s as good as any other location, in this room. There’s nothing of use to anyone left, not even to someone as shrewd as Dirtyhands used to be before he lobotomized himself into the Sun Summoner. Or before he was—

Kaz pushes himself up from his kneeling position using the walls he faces. He mutters, “I beg your forgiveness for keeping you waiting, Aleks.” His voice sounds odd.

“Are you crying?”

“Jesper?!”

Kaz turns so quickly he has to brace himself against the wall again lest he fall over. His translucent shirt ripples. His dark eyes in his weird new too-handsome face trace over Jesper, again and again. If they were fingers, Jesper would feel like he’s being caressed. No, that’s the wrong thought. A thought from a book he won’t admit he’s read. Jesper’s got his guns out. He came here for a reason. A bloody, glorious reason.

“Inej wouldn’t want me to do this, but she’s locked up in the fucking Menagerie,” he announces, just to see whether Kaz can feel even a shred of guilt. “Just so you could be a Ravkan prince in ugly yellow lingerie.”

“Just follow my—”

No, then. Or maybe it’s just the new face Jesper can’t read. Not that it matters. “Shut up. Do you remember what you told me when I joined the Dregs? About what you’d do to traitors? Well, I have added a couple of my own ideas.”

“Shut up, Jesper. You can monologue when we’re done, but—”

Jesper aims right between his weird, smooth pebble eyes. “When you left us, you knew it would all go to shit. Inej’s in the Menagerie, and there’s no way to get her out again. Haskell let the Dregs collapse after you disappeared. No Dregs, no kru—”

Kaz flinches. “Quick. Get under the bed. Now.”

Whether it’s surprise, a sex instinct, or—far worse—a lingering sense of loyalty, Jesper obeys instantly.

☼

“We’re lost,” Jesper moans. They’ve been surrounded by trees for four days. He’s not even sure they’re trudging vaguely southwards anymore. Everything looks the same. What wouldn’t Jesper give to be back in Ketterdam already, with its lovely street names and pedestrians and garish landmarks (and gangsters about to string him up), or at least somewhere in Novyi Zem where he sort of understands the landscape. Or what’s left of Shu Han, so Kaz can unclench.

“We’re not lost,” Kaz rasps. “Keep going.”

“How do you—the map.” The half-chewed-up map hidden under Kaz’ bed, the map he snuck into his coat—Jesper’s kefta, whatever—even though he probably already knows it by heart.

“Yes. The map.”

“Why the fuck are you telling me to choose where we’re going if you’re memorized the map?!” What an asshole. Jesper just clean forgot what a piece of shit Kaz is. He forgot it so utterly he’s helping him break out of Ravka, without even extracting anything in return. He’s a fucking idiot. “Is it so you can blame me when we get caught?”

Kaz, the dick, rolls his eyes. “Wouldn’t I rather not get caught at all? Think, Jesper—what’s the one advantage you have over me?”

“I’m prettier,” Jesper shoots back. “My winning personality. I have a better tolerance for hard liquor. Fashion sense. I’m funny. No, wait—I’m a much more generous lover.”

“He doesn’t know you,” Kaz hisses, making the pronoun sound even more slimy than the guy it’s referring to, which is honestly quite a feat. “Do you think this is my first attempt? He’ll send people to every single route out of his core territory that poses any advantages. He has enough soldiers for that. What he doesn’t have, though, is enough soldiers to watch every route your bird-brain might pick at random.”

And then, he stalks ahead viciously. No. Limps ahead.

It’s been growing much more pronounced over the days. At first, even without a cane he walked just like any person with two healthy legs, and that’s what Jesper expected. The Ravkans healed their Saint’s leg, didn’t they? That’s what they would do. Only Kaz can think around enough corners to make his bad leg into an advantage. But with every passing day, Kaz’ gait has grown closer to what Jesper remembers from back before the world went to shit. Kaz was touchy about accommodations back then, though, or people being nice in general, so Jesper hasn’t even brought up improvising a new cane. All he’s dared to do is slowing down his own steps to what he remembers would have matched Kaz, back then.

And insisting on taking breaks. Like he does now.

“It’s almost night, you refuse to make light despite being made of sunshine, and I’m hungry,” he complains.

“I’d assume that Ketterdam has made you soft,” Kaz rasps, “o cherished crown jewel of crime and commerce, and what’s the difference.” He limps back to the fallen tree that Jesper has chosen as their camp site, though, so he must be a just few steps short of utter collapse.

Jesper unwraps the two woollen blankets he’s been carrying on his shoulders. They didn’t get a chance to steal much, mostly because Kaz was a prick about it and didn’t even let Jesper go back to his room: apparently there was time for Kaz to fold up a paper bag into a facsimile of an envelope and write an address in Djerholm onto it and have Jesper talk a stable-hand into riding out to deliver it, right now, but no time to search anywhere else for supplies. They took just whatever they found in the stables, which amounted to extra coats, some boots, the blankets, and horse feed. And gloves. Kaz declared it was time to run as soon as he’d found gloves.

Balefully, Jesper chews on his oats. Even wrapped in his blanket, the night is cold, and Kaz—who’s still wearing nothing but underpants besides the robe/gloves/Jesper’s kefta/stolen coat combo and ill-fitting boots without socks—is shivering violently.

“We should steal you some real clothes from the next house we see,” Jesper mutters. “And some decent food.”

“We’re not stealing anything until we’re in Shu.”

They’ve had this argument before. Jesper shouldn’t be as thrilled about that as he is. There’s no way to resolve it, until they find the border—or until Kaz keels over from hypothermia, because then even his rational fear of detection won’t keep Jesper from finding some trousers. For the time being, though—

“I’m going to sit closer and steal your body heat. In exchange, you can wrap my blanket around your legs.”

Kaz glares. He can do it masterfully again: just like the limp snuck back as soon as he left the Little Palace, his face over the days grew thin and pockmarked. Vicious. Jesper’s commited it to memory, in case Oily, Tall and Dark steals it again.

“If you freeze to death tonight, this was all for nothing. I could be sleeping in a palace right now. Well, a dingy side house, with the other Materialniks, but joke’s on them. This whole escape would have been much more complicated if I’d been a Squaller. Or a Sun Summoner, who refuses to even use his power to warm us up.”

“Leave it.” Kaz runs a finger roughly over where his collarbone should be, and he shudders. The temperature, or something worse, some new pain he’s not revealing—but carefully, he leans his blanketed side against Jesper, and allows Jesper to throw his own blanket over him, too.

“I’ll make you a new cane tomorrow. With a head, too, if we can scavenge enough metal from the buttons. Not a crow. You haven’t earned that until we free Inej, but maybe… a worm.”

“That’s just a stick,” Kaz mutters. “Go to sleep.”

Easy for him to say: Kaz is taking the first watch, and so he’s not balancing on a fallen log in the cold without a blanket, trying to fall asleep sitting up while leaning against Kaz’ shoulder with as little contact surface as physically possible. After some hours or minutes, though, Jesper’s suffering is too much for even Kaz to handle. Who knew there was a limit! Who knew Kaz had heard of mercy! Maybe he just doesn’t like Jesper wriggling next to him. He fists a lock of Jesper’s curls and pulls his head down into his lap.

“I didn’t help you because I want to fuck you, just so you’re aware,” Jesper jokes, because this is actually—it’s actually almost comfortable curling up on the fallen tree with his head on the blanket on Kaz’ thighs, even though there’s the remnants of a branch digging into his hip and they’re on the run from all Grisha in the world and also the new, expanded Ravka that covers nearly every country on this continent and Inej’s still imprisoned and if they actually manage to get back to Ketterdam, Jesper’s going to be in so much shit. And still, it’s… “I mourned you, you know, when Haskell told me you’d died. I wasn’t just angry because the Dregs were a shambles without you.”

Kaz is quiet. Jesper sort of wishes he’d touch his hair again, or his shoulder—and he never seemed to have any trouble touching the Darkling, so what, is Jesper not good enough—but he also looked like a void back there, like in order to endure it maybe he had to smother—

“That’s not why I mentioned that fantasy back there,” says Kaz, lyingly. Sure. He just happened to invoke Jesper’s obvious past crush for no reason whatsoever. The awfully convenient infatuation Jesper didn’t have sense nor skill to hide back then. Kaz is exactly the kind of person who’d exploit someone’s first love. The person who’s realize, long before Jesper did, that maybe, he’s not actually completely over—but maybe that wasn’t the important bit then. It went on. And that story about the Darkling—

“You thought I’d help you out of pity?” Jesper would have done, if he hadn’t been so angry—if he hadn’t been already so freaked out by the placid expression, the clothes that looked expressly designed to torture the Kaz he knew, the cell… It wasn’t pity. What is it you feel when a person you knew—maybe not his secrets or his past or his thoughts or what trouble he just dragged you into because he’s a secretive dick, but still, you knew him, it was burned into your heart, his movements and the codes he taught you and just when a heist was about to trigger one of his fears he’d never mentioned and you needed to get him out now… What do you feel, when that person comes back from the dead, and comes back wrong. Like a stag with too many tongues inside its mouths and its hands locked behind its throat. Except the other way round, because Kaz Brekker was terrifying, and what he was made into or what pretended to be was only scary because it wasn’t. Anyway. Kaz is a manipulative commandeering asshole again, so it doesn’t matter. “You despise pity.”

“It’s a tool, just like everything else. One he couldn’t take. And pride just gave me—pity got me out of the Little Palace, didn’t it?”

“Something did.” Jesper tips his non-existent hat, and Kaz slaps the top of his head to make him stop wriggling. He keeps the hand there this time, knotted tight in Jesper’s hair. It stings, but it’s also… Jesper closes his eyes and tries to fall asleep before inevitably, it’ll leave.

“Pride. It was my fault.” Kaz’ voice almost sounds the way it did back home. Harsh, vicious—and damaged. Human. “I thought I could bear it. He was—the Sun Summoner could have no weaknesses, he said, nothing for our enemies to use, and I allowed myself to think… ‘our’ enemies. I practiced. It was easier, after a while, to bear touch. I thought—it seemed like the best option, to stand at his side, and to make him see me as his partner I should… I was tired of being a prisoner. I thought I could use him.”

That’s bad enough, but… “But you’re limping again,” Jesper hisses. “If he’s forming you like a clay doll to make you his perfect Sun Summoner, he should have started with healing you.”

“They did, when I first came to the Palace. I didn’t want—but I learned to accept it. After my first escape, he broke it again, personally. Had it tailored over, afterwards, every few days. Incentive for cooperation.”

There’s nothing Jesper can do to fix this stagnant, lifeless voice. He could hug Inej, at least, but this—

“It’s what I would have done, too. He was just better than me, and he didn’t need another one, so he had to change me.”

“By dressing you up and making you look like a doll. If you tell me it was a sex thing, at least I could—no, still couldn’t relate. His taste’s shit. That beauty was pretty ugly,” Jesper mutters into Kaz’ thighs.

Kaz pulls at his hair again—probably a rebuke, but the sting travels down Jesper’s spine to—well, it’s time to change the subject rather quickly. What’s there to… oh yeah, his head’s on a blanket. That’ll do. “I just had a great idea,” he says, and—yeah, his voice is still completely normal and steady. A little loud, maybe. Kaz hasn’t moved his hand away, though, so it can’t be too obvious.

“Don’t hurt yourself.”

“Fuck off, my bright idea of breaking into the centre of Grishadom to kill you in a murder-suicide attack because what else was I going to do, let the Dime Lions grind me between millstones to press out the fifty thousand kruge I may perhaps still owe them—”

“You what?!”

Jesper powers on, because that’s really a conversation best left for when he’s not lying in a forest with his head in Kaz’ lap and trying to forget, desperately, the way it felt when Kaz pulled his hair. The way it feels when he does it again. “I’m just saying, it saved you. You’re welcome. So anyway. We only have one pair of trousers. I was going to suggest we alternate wearing mine, but we both know I wouldn’t get them back.”

“Your so-called idea is… interesting,” Kaz mutters, voice almost pulled asunder trying for both disturbed and mocking. “But I’m far more interested to hear about the fact you skipped out of Ketterdam without paying your debts. A crime punishable by death in every gang. Every gang in Ketterdam, the city where you want us to go.”

And yeah, that’s occurred to Jesper, but… “That’s a problem for later. You’ll think of something, boss, if we make it that far. You always have a plan. For now… I wouldn’t—well, I would carry you if your legs freeze off, but it wouldn’t be fun for either of us, so… You sewed yourself up constantly back home, and I’d wager sewing is just like swimming. Once you know, you can never forget.”

“Skills are useless if you lack every materia—Jes—”

“Yeah, I definitely can turn a button into a needle now. We just need to tear the second blanket into some vaguely trouser-shaped pieces, and for thread—well, we could just tear up your Sun Summoner robe, it’s useless anyway.”

“Jesper,” Kaz rasps again.

“I’m a genius?”

“No, you’re still an idiot. Why not, though?”

☼

Kaz Brekker disappeared between Sunday and Tuesday night. That’s all Jesper knows, and it’s that precise only because Kaz has been experimenting with the payroll recently. Apparently, handing out wages on late Tuesday maximizes the chances of flushing as much money as possible back into the coffers of Dregs-owned establishments, and he’s also taken to handing out the money personally. Some weird power play that Haskell hasn’t yet forbidden: everyone knows Kaz barely bothers to keep his accomplices informed about the job they’re currently doing, and the big boss tolerates him mostly because Dirtyhands is still more useful insubordinate than dead.

It’s Wednesday now, though. Wednesday afternoon.

And Jesper still hasn’t gotten paid.

Kaz is gone.

Jesper’s in Haskell’s office, inquiring about everyone’s money. Too irritated by the games of Makker’s Wheel he was forced to miss out on last night to perform anything but the most pro forma I remember my boss’ boss is technically my boss and can kill me pleasantries. Instead of promising to kick Kaz’ ass, though, like Jesper hoped, Haskell just tells him Pasko will give him his wages tomorrow.

Haskell won’t say anything else. Just, “That boy got himself mixed up in something he couldn’t handle alone, and it fucked him. You won’t like what you find, when you go looking for the dead.”

#jesper fahey #kaz brekker #inej ghafa #kaz x jesper #I'm free! well sort of I have an idea for a coda in which jesper roleplays the darkling so.......#dimtraces makes things #shadow & bone #shadow and bone

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natequarter · 3 years

Text

the maiko tangled au several people asked for

There are rumours of a missing baby, of the Crown Prince in absentia.

It's been years - sixteen years, to be precise - and nobody has heard a word.

The Fire Lord is a hopeful sort of man, and lights lanterns every year in order of a boy most people don't know the name of. Mai, a cynical girl on the run, doesn't give a damn about possibilities when there's cold hard cash to be stolen and rich assholes to cheat out of all their money.

She doesn't strictly mean to steal the ostrich-horse, the same way she doesn't strictly mean to break into a tower in the middle of a forest because she was trying to keep Azula's cronies off her tail.

(How long have they been in the criminal underground, children trying to escape their horrible parents? She doesn't recall, and has no nostalgia for their childhood.)

The boy with the firebreathing thing on his shoulder knocks her out cold.

"Huh-"

"Don't touch me!" The boy - what even is his name? - darts around the room. Fucking lightweight. He wouldn't stand a chance against old Azulon's spies, or Azula and Ty Lee if they ever stopped trying to kill each other.

"I wa-"

"You have knives up your sleeves."

She glares. "And you know that how...?"

He winces.

"Oh no. What did you do."

"I kind of... stole all your knives?"

She tries to lunge for her knives, but he flies out of the way like some sort of acrobat (like Ty Lee), evading her grasp. Her weight pulls her over, and it's that that forces her to realise she's tied to a chair.

"Unhand me!"

"I mean, I could cut off your hands," he says, "but that seems kind of overboard."

It's then that she realises his hair, tied in a high ponytail, extends not down to his black hanfu as she'd previously thought, but down beyond his legs, winding around the room like a bizarre pulley system.

In fact, the room is extremely tall, and narrow, and climbing up here was definitely a mistake.

Funny, he looks like Azula when he squints like that.

Asides from the scar, what's up with his face?

"Don't do that, actually."

He still looks spooked. "Who are you, and what do you want?"

"Mai. I'm, uh..." She tries to think of an acceptable lie. "I juggle knives. With my friend, Ty Lee."

He believes it, thank Agni.

"Who are you?" It's accusatory. She doesn't care.

"Zuko." His name, his features... they should remind her of someone, but she has no idea who.

"Why are you here? Shouldn't you, I don't know... have parents."

He shrugs. "I have my grandfather. Sometimes he goes out for a few days."

"Don't you ever go with him?"

"No? I've never been outside. It's dangerous." He pauses for effect. "I could die."

She snorts. "You? You could die? Please, any attacker would die of shame. You're far too pretty to be killed."

"Um, thanks?"

"I could show you outside, you know. Nobody murders kids like you out there."

"Really?" He looks thrilled. "But... my grandfather."

"You'd be back in time," she lies.

"Then why not?" He practically jumps out the tower.

Mai likes him.

"Whoa! What's this?" Zuko grabs a handful of plants. "It's so soft, and... green." The animal on his shoulder breaths sparks, and the leaves combust.

"That's leaves. And plants." She runs a hand through her short hair. It still sticks up an inordinate amount.

"Plants are cool."

Not all of them. She sighs. "if you insist."

The ostrich-horse she tied to the tower beckons; Mai gestures to it. "Fancy a ride?"

"'Course!"

Mai lifts him on, and rides.

(She pretends not to notice how her breath hitches at his touch.)

"Get her!"

Yelling, Azula's gang probably. Mai ignores it, steering the animal as fast as she can towards an inn. This bunch are Ozai's territory. Neutral territory, at least as far as Mai is concerned.

"Why does that weird girl with the knife want to get you?" Zuko yells in her ear. She'd forgotten she'd stolen Azula's crown. Oh well.

"Long story!"

"Are you a criminal?"

"Not the time!"

What can save you from a gang of criminals, if not a boy with a dragon and a good singing voice? She makes a note to ask the name of the damn thing before it burns her clothes off.

"-And I have a dream!" she finds herself yelling with the crowd. It's true. She does have dreams, buried under her mother's disapproval though they may be.

"What's your dream, Mai?" Zuko asks.

"I want to be..." The truth is, she once wanted to be a princess. Ridiculous. "Free."

"That's boring and doesn't have any lanterns involved though!"

"Lanterns?"

"Long story. Some other time?"

"I guess."

She looks away from Zuko (Agni, was she staring?) to find a pub of angry villagers.

Whoops.

"Are you, like, a murderer?" he yells.

"No, I just publicly betrayed and consequently got humiliated and disowned by everyone who knew me."

"Well who in all of Oma and Shu did you know to get such a bad reaction?"

"A princess!"

"You're a princess?"

"No, the girl I betrayed was. I'm just a noble. Well, ex-noble. If we're doing life stories, can I ask why you have a horrible scar on your face?"

"Druk burnt me."

"Druk?"

"Yeah." He lifted up the lizard thing.

"It's called Druk? I was calling it Lizzie." Zuko shot her a look. "Short for Lizard?"

"No?"

Zuko just stares.

Being on the run is hard. Being on the run from Azula's forces with a boy with ridiculously long hair is harder. Nearly drowning in a cave is definitely hardest.

Events move too fast for her to count; before she knows it, she's sitting in the Caldera braiding Zuko's hair. It's struck through with gold, she notices, and when he sings the strands glow. Some people would find this romantic. Mai finds it weird.

But he looks pretty in the sun, and he looks even prettier with his ridiculously long hair braided to perfection. She threads firelilies through it. Zuko grins.

"You like that, huh?"

"It looks cute!"

"It does."

"Just like you, Mai."

She blushes furiously, trying not to stutter. "Th-thanks."

Mai quickly regains her composure. "Anything you'd like to do tonight? Other than the festivals."

"I'd like to see the lanterns. Grandfather says they're on the same day as my birthday, so I like seeing them."

"I can do that, I guess."

"Thanks, Mai."

Anything for you, she almost says.

The man holding Mai by the wrists is a creep, she knows that. "What do you want with me? With him?"

"I want to live forever!" He snarls. "His hair keeps me young, see."

"No, I don't see."

"Enough with the sass." The ropes dig into her hands.

"Let me go!"

"Not until I get Zuko back. Come out, come out, wherever you are..."

Nothing.

"The nation is waiiiiting! For their prince!"

A series of things click into place, all at once. The lanterns. His absence. Who her captor is.

Zuko.

Prince Zuko, who looks like Azula and has been missing for exactly sixteen years...

What luck.

Mai doesn't have the chance to entertain fighting back before she's falling to the floor, from her precarious position. The man below her hits the ground with a thud, and she feels something break both within her and below her.

"No!"

Agonised screams, Zuko, hair and glowing and singing and-

Darkness.

"Mai!"

She wakes up, head aching. "...Zuko?"

"You were - you were dead-"

The first thing she notices is his hair. "Was I?"

"Yes! You were! Don't do that again."

"Sure," she says. "I won't."

"These are the lanterns, Zuko."

"My lanterns." The bastard is smug. Then again, he did give up some damn good hair to save her life. Fair trade.

"They look beautiful."

"I have to agree. And," he says, illuminated by moonlight, "so are you."

She stares, and then snaps out of it, and leans in to kiss him. Now that will wipe the smirk off his face.

#i will not write this fully YET #but #here goes #mai #zuko #maiko #atla #tangled

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bisluthq · 4 years

Text

SS Tily does not lay claim to Lover; a thesis

I thought this would take me longer but y’all, I’m done with Part 2 of my Gaylor analyses. Unfortunately this chapter brings bad news for Tily nation. I honestly don’t think many of the songs on Lover are about that relationship. But I also think it’s not as simple as the mainstream Kaylor narrative would have us believe. Let’s dive into this, shall we?

First things first. I think it’s worth noting that many of the songs on this album are not about romantic relationships at all. Like it’s a bit of a marketing ploy to portray it as an album primarily about romantic love when so many songs explicitly aren’t about that feeling. In fact, there are more themes on Lover than on any of her earlier stuff - it’s something she expands on in folklore.

I Forgot That You Existed, The Man, The Archer (which I firmly believe is about her debating coming out), Miss Americana & the Heartbreak Prince (very obviously about the political situation generally and supported by the doccie title), London Boy, Soon You’ll Get Better, YNTCD, and ME! are all about explicitly different themes. Obviously there are a couple references within those (like ME! has that line about “I never leave well enough alone” which reappears on the 1, and The Archer mentions someone “staying” but I still think ME! is about self-love not romantic love and The Archer is about personal anxiety around identity). Fundamentally, they are not love songs.

I don’t think that’s really up for debate. The only one I can see anyone - say Toes or like hardcore Tily fans - debating is London Boy. Unfortunately for my Tily babes, I do think it’s satire that serves as a homage to Joe and the other British beards, and possibly riffs a teeny bit on her time with Lily. Contrary to some gold medalists in Kaylor mental gymnastics, I fully believe Tay does make reference to Joe in her lyrics (I’ve mentioned the fictional verse for Dress and the reference to “keeping him” in Ready for It). This really doesn’t have any of the hallmarks of Tily songs off of Rep. The British references in CIWYW, KOMH and Delicate are subtle and chilled and actually quite cute. London Boy is an onslaught of non-sequiturs about London, the UK and her beards. Also “stories from uni” fits both Joe and Tom H, but it doesn’t fit Lily who never went to university. All her Lily songs are about hiding out in private; London Boy is all about galavanting around town with “his” friends (Lily and Tay had the same friends though?) It’s simply not about the same person or the same relationship.

I do think there’s a chance it could be poking fun (lightly) at Lily/that period she spent in London because as I’ve already said I think Tay is not above shading ex-girlfriends and it seems like the kind of thing Karlie would’ve also found a bit funny. I think when she got back together with Karlie - which almost definitely happened - she would’ve 100% laughed about the “say you fancy me not fancy stuff” era. That would explain the recurrence of both Motown and queen imagery, which first appeared on KOMH. But where KOMH felt very genuine and authentic, this one is obviously meant to be funny.

Right. So. Now that we’ve established 8 songs are about other themes, let’s get the Kaylor songs sorted: Cruel Summer, Cornelia Street, DBATC, False God and Daylight are all undeniably about Karlie fucking Kloss. They all feature the images and tropes and hallmarks that pepper Karlie songs. They all have the same kinds of emotions. And they paint a pretty sad, troubling and complex picture.

Cruel Summer comes first and seems to mostly be about their first breakup, which she first referred to on DWOHT. We have Tay once again begging Karlie to stay and work it out and not being certain for sure about her feelings.

We say that we'll just screw it up in these trying times

We're not trying (Oh yeah, you're right, I want it)

I mean that’s super sad. Tay’s saying they discussed how they’ll fuck it all up, and she’s feeling like they’re not even trying to fix things. You also have that “I want it” which is interesting considering the “we” that preceded it. “We’re” not trying because only “I want it”. Ouch.

Killing me slow, out the window

I'm always waiting for you to be waiting below

Devils roll the dice, angels roll their eyes

What doesn't kill me makes me want you more

And it's new, the shape of your body

It's blue, the feeling I've got

And it's ooh, whoa oh

It's a cruel summer

It's cool, that's what I tell 'em

No rules in breakable heaven

But ooh, whoa oh

It's a cruel summer

With you

Here we have “I’m always waiting for you” which yet again suggests Tay is the one who’s more invested. Then we have the shape of “your” body (which is a familiar concept from Dress), but the feeling it gives her here is blue here not gold - maybe that’s why the shape is new? In the past Karlie’s body made her feel golden but now it’s a bluer, sadder feeling. Blue starts recurring more frequently on these late era Kaylor songs. There’s a possible alternate reading, which is blue = Swiftgron (“my love had been frozen deep blue”). It’s a nice theory but it just doesn’t gel with the garden gate below. Also, while both relationships seem to have been colored by commitment issues, the premise of unrequitedness doesn’t really feature on the songs about Di. She asks Di to stay, tells her she’s thinking of her, and they’re “too in love to think straight” but Tay never says Karlie loves her back. Ever. It’s never expressly mutual.

I'm drunk in the back of the car

And I cried like a baby coming home from the bar (Oh)

Said, "I'm fine," but it wasn't true

I don't wanna keep secrets just to keep you

And I snuck in through the garden gate

Every night that summer just to seal my fate (Oh)

And I scream, "For whatever it's worth

I love you, ain't that the worst thing you ever heard?"

He looks up, grinning like a devil

Look at that fourth line. It perfectly fits with the Kaylor narrative on Rep and it doesn’t fit the Tily songs at all. She wanted to keep that second relationship private and secret and hidden. And here she’s saying “I don’t want to keep secrets” - this is take two of “I don’t want you like a best friend”. Also the “for whatever it’s worth” reminds me of “here’s the truth” from End Game. It’s the kind of thing you’d say in the midst of a fight.

Then we have her screaming “I love you” and receiving no reply as usual beyond a devilish grin. The more I do these analyses the less I understand how or why Kaylor gets romanticized in the way it does, while Swiftgron gets bashed for toxicity. Like my girl Tay has a thing for chaotic lesbians with commitment issues and Kaylor seems like it was WILD.

Back to the lyrics, this time let’s look at Kaylor anthem Cornelia Street:

We were in the backseat

Drunk on something stronger than the drinks in the bar

"I rent a place on Cornelia Street"

I say casually in the car

We were a fresh page on the desk

Filling in the blanks as we go

As if the street lights pointed in an arrowhead

Leading us home

I find this whole song really interesting because it features one of Tay’s favorite ideas - glamorizing normal people things. It’s like the time with the “motel bar” in Getaway Car. Like she 100% was thrilled to be able to say “I’m renting this apartment” - never mind that it’s basically a whole ass house. I actually think the above verse is really beautiful. I know I give Kaylor a lot of shit but obviously there were beautiful moments and Tay had/has plenty of good memories.

And I hope I never lose you, hope it never ends

I'd never walk Cornelia Street again

That's the kind of heartbreak time could never mend

I'd never walk Cornelia Street again

And baby, I get mystified by how this city screams your name

And baby, I'm so terrified of if you ever walk away

I'd never walk Cornelia Street again

I mean frankly this verse above is super insecure in the standard Kaylor way. Tay’s saying she’s terrified of Karlie walking away and that she “hopes” she never loses her. The tone is sad, forlorn and a little desperate. I also think it’s interesting that she says she’d never walk Cornelia Street again, and that the city screams Karlie’s name and then on hoax she goes ahead and says she left a part of herself back in New York. It’s almost like her fears and anxieties did prove justified. Poor baby.

Windows flung right open, autumn air

Jacket 'round my shoulders is yours

We bless the rains on Cornelia Street

Memorize the creaks in the floor

Back when we were card sharks, playing games

I thought you were leading me on

I packed my bags, left Cornelia Street

Before you even knew I was gone

But then you called, showed your hand

I turned around before I hit the tunnel

Sat on the roof, you and I

Those first four lines seem to be about the good again, and I’m happy for them. I really do think they had good times. Those four lines make me think of parts of YAIL and the toast and weekends and stuff.

The rest of this verse though seems to be about the first split and subsequent reunion. “I thought you were leading me on” she says, and I “left Cornelia Street” presumably to go to London. But then Karlie called her back, “showed her hand” and Tay “turned around” before she reached the point of no return and they worked it out. “Sat on the roof, you and I” is similar in content to “up on the roof with a schoolgirl crush” but very different in tone. She’s not peppy here, she’s not positive. It’s a little bit tortured - and then it continues with “hoping it never ends”. The reappearance of the Tily imagery on Kaylor 2.0 songs makes sense to me, again, because discussing exes in the same social circle as you is just blatant lesbian culture. It makes complete sense that these two women are on Taylor’s mind. She has really really deep feelings for Karlie but she enjoyed the more simple and straightforward relationship she had with Lily.

DBATC is the Kaylor 1.0 breakup anthem:

Saying goodbye is death by a thousand cuts

Flashbacks waking me up

I get drunk, but it's not enough

'Cause the morning comes and you're not my baby

I look through the windows of this love

Even though we boarded them up

Chandelier's still flickering here

'Cause I can't pretend it's okay when it's not

It's death by a thousand cuts

We have her getting drunk to forget, trying to say “I’m fine” when it’s not true, and just generally missing Karlie.

I dress to kill my time, I take the long way home

I mean, this is Cornelia Street (“never walk here again”) and Dress all over again. It’s the two ideas from before but now on the other side, because they’re actually broken up.

And what once was ours is no one's now

I see you everywhere, the only thing we share

Is this small town

You said it was a great love, one for the ages

But if the story's over, why am I still writing pages?

“I see you everywhere” is very “this city screams your name” and I think “small town” is a metaphor for their social circle. The last two lines are just Tay being hung up on Karlie. She was writing pages in Cornelia Street as well, so this whole idea of telling a story with Karlie is another recurrent image.

My heart, my hips, my body, my love

Tryna find a part of me that you didn't touch

Gave up on me like I was a bad drug

Now I'm searching for signs in a haunted club

Our songs, our films, united, we stand

Our country, guess it was a lawless land

Quiet my fears with the touch of your hand

Paper cut stings from our paper-thin plans

My time, my wine, my spirit, my trust

Tryna find a part of me you didn't take up

Gave you so much, but it wasn't enough

But I'll be alright, it's just a thousand cuts

I mean this is the usual obsession, desperation and general pining Tay has for Karlie. We also have Karlie touching her briefly, which is something she has spoken about before and is really into. Paper-thin plans is probably about the plans to make it work? We have that image reparations later in hoax so I think it’s most likely about Karlie bailing on Tay’s PR game and doing her own thing and/or Karlie’s (accidental?) involvement in the masters heist.

Also, this whole song is very sad but it’s not on the level of desperation I would expect if Tay wasn’t rebounding hard and if they didn’t reunite. She’s pretty sad about how the whole thing went down but she does say she’ll “be alright” which is the opposite of “that’s the kind of heartbreak time could never mend”. I think she wrote this after the first breakup and Cornelia Street came later, after they were back together. That’s when she really went all in into this relationship. It still wasn’t enough.

False God is about their reunion:

We were crazy to think

Crazy to think that this could work

Remember how I said I'd die for you?

We were stupid to jump

In the ocean separating us

Remember how I'd fly to you?

We know Tay ran away to Europe after the mess of 2016 and here she jumps into the ocean separating them and flies back to Karlie. The idea of it being “crazy” that it could work is also a recurrent fear/anxiety she has with regards to Karlie. “I had a bad feeling,” remember?

And I can't talk to you when you're like this

Staring out the window like I'm not your favorite town

I'm New York City, I still do it for you, babe

They all warned us about times like this

They say the road gets hard and you get lost

When you're led by blind faith, blind faith

They’re figuring things out, and Tay is New York - Karlie’s favorite city. “I still do it for you” is an admission of affection, which rarely happens in Kaylor songs, but it’s so sexual that I don’t find it shocking or out of character.

But we might just get away with it

Religion's in your lips

Even if it's a false god

We'd still worship

We might just get away with it

The altar is my hips

Even if it's a false god

We'd still worship this love

I mean sex songs are just peak Kaylor and this is all just so so so gay and I don’t understand how hets can make it make srnse. “We might just get away with it” is the usual Kaylor anxiety by the way.

I know heaven's a thing

I go there when you touch me, honey

Hell is when I fight with you

But we can patch it up good

Make confessions and we're begging for forgiveness

Got the wine for you

And you can't talk to me when I'm like this

Daring you to leave me just so I can try and scare you

You're the West Village

You still do it for me, babe

They all warned us about times like this

They say the road gets hard and you get lost

When you're led by blind faith, blind faith

Standard Kaylor imagery with sensual touching, wine and New York and a direct reference to Karlie’s apartment. I think “make confessions and we’re begging for forgiveness” appears to refer to the reunion.

Daylight is a very beautiful love song for Karlie. The “golden”, the bodies intertwining, New York, and the depth of her emotions all fit the Kaylor story and narrative. I think she wrote this when they were back together. It’s also, as is common with the Kaylor songs, squarely from Tay’s perspective. She wrote it alone, and I think specifically for Karlie when they reunited. Very pretty, very nice. I mean they ended up breaking up and that was bound to happen in like every other song but when they were good Tay did create some gems and they were very happy. I love this song and I do like aspects of Kaylor’s time together.

Now we get onto the songs that don’t neatly fit Kaylor.

Afterglow could be a Kaylor song. But it could also be about the breakup with her rebound. It’s not only by Tay, so we’re looking for broad themes rather than specifics necessarily.

Hey, it's all me, in my head

I'm the one who burned us down

But it's not what I meant

Sorry that I hurt you

I don't wanna do, I don't wanna do this to you (Ooh)

I don't wanna lose, I don't wanna lose this with you (Ooh)

I need to say, hey, it's all me, just don't go

Meet me in the afterglow

I don’t know that this sounds like the Kaylor breakup we heard about. It’s a different premise to False God, DBATC and Cornelia Street. In all of those songs it was a mutual breakup/misunderstanding. “I can’t talk to you” and then “you can’t talk to me” in False God is a two-way communication issue. DBATC goes off at Karlie for taking up every part of her and “giving up on me”. Cornelia Street said Tay thought Karlie was “leading her on” but that was resolved. Then Afterglow goes and lays all the blame on Tay.

I lived like an island, punished you with silence

Went off like sirens, just crying

Why'd I have to break what I love so much?

It's on your face, don't walk away, I need to say

Hey, it's all me, in my head

I'm the one who burned us down

I mean this really does sound like it’s Tay fucking up badly. Not wanting to let the other person in, taking it out on them, hurting her lover.

It's so excruciating to see you low

Just wanna lift you up and not let you go

This ultraviolet morning light below

Tells me this love is worth the fight, oh

This really doesn’t sound like the Kaylor fear and stress. It sounds like the cerebral and emotional connection from Rep. “It’s so excruciating to see you low” seems tied up with the heart to hearts and conversations she was having in those secondary songs on Rep.

Tell me that you're still mine

Tell me that we'll be just fine

Even when I lose my mind

I need to say

Tell me that it's not my fault

Tell me that I'm all you want

Even when I break your heart

I need to say

This just seems like a very different plan for fixing things than the one outlined in the Kaylor songs (which is “let’s bone”). Also “I break your heart” is an anxiety that seems to parallel the burgeoning love in Delicate, KOMH and CIWYW. It doesn’t seem like a Kaylor fear because Tay is always the one who wants Karlie more. I believe this is mostly a Tily breakup song.

Then we get the three happy songs on the album: Lover, I Think He Knows and Paper Rings. It’s actually pretty intense that there are only three peppy, romantic songs on an album largely touted by Gaylors and Hetlors alike as being about a happy long term relationship.

You want my controversial explanation for these songs? They’re fictional. All three are extremely vague and lacking in any of the Karlie/other person imagery. They’re like New Year’s Day and some of the early stuff.

I Think He Knows is a very hetro song. It physically pains me to say that, it really does, but nothing about it seems gay to me. I guess “boyish look” is something you could say about some women but that’s really a reach. Also it’s just very much not a relatable lesbian emotion. I’ve never met a queer woman being like “yeah I think she KNOWS, you know?” about her girlfriend. “She’s so obsessed with me and boy I understand” would make no sense. Us sapphics are compulsive overthinkers. And that’s what comes across on all her songs about Karlie and about Di and even those Tily songs from Rep. That’s largely why Tay’s stuff is so damn gay.

Tay’s permanently anxious - even on her love songs, there’s a thread of anxiety running through it all. This song is missing any of that anxiety. This song also has so, so many male pronouns…. And “I am an architect, I'm drawing up the plans” is an objectively weird thing to say about a relationship. It just doesn’t strike me as sapphic, and it definitely doesn’t strike me as being about Karlie lr Lily or Di. Also Nashville is 16th Avenue and I don’t know why any of the women would be associated with Nashville.

That Nashville reference makes me think that maybe the song is inspired by the music industry generally? If you go look at 16th Avenue by Lacy J. Dalton, there’s a clear narrative about the music industry. I think it’s possible that Tay’s song is referencing the love she feels for and from the music industry and her fans. That would tie into the architectural plans, being 17 (she often speaks about being stuck at that age because it’s when she got famous), and “he’s so obsessed with me” makes sense when you’re AOTD. Even the “attitude” line makes sense in this interpretation.

This bit:

Lyrical smile, indigo eyes, hand on my thigh

We can follow the sparks, I'll drive

Lyrical smile, indigo eyes, hand on my thigh

We can follow the sparks, I'll drive

"So where we gonna go?"

I whisper in the dark

"Where we gonna go?"

I think he knows

Is a little harder to make sense of and seems like it could maybe be about Lily or at least inspired by her - there’s the car/driving theme from the secondary Rep relationship and Lily does have indigo eyes (they’re way bluer than Joe’s). So maybe she used images and diaries from that period to add to the story about Nashville? But overall this smugness just doesn’t strike me as very gay and in general the song doesn’t seem to be about any one woman in her history. Also “better lock it down or I won’t stick around” is so very hetro and like… untortured.

Paper Rings is not about Karlie but I also don’t think it’s about Lily.

The moon is high

Like your friends were the night that we first met

Went home and tried to stalk you on the internet

Now I've read all of the books beside your bed

The wine is cold

Like the shoulder that I gave you in the street

Cat and mouse for a month or two or three

Now I wake up in the night and watch you breathe

This is not about Karlie. We’ve heard repeatedly that they fell in love at first sight so “month or two or three” is kinda wild? Like they full on U-Hauled it with the Big Sur trip and Tay moving to New York and Karlie basically moving into her apartment. They were never cat and mouse? Also Karlie was a supermodel by the time they met one another so “trying to stalk you on the internet” seems a bit of an odd way to phrase it. There would’ve been plenty to find. They both had big reputations. Moreover, they had multiple mutual friends so “your friends” is also an odd turn of phrase. How does this verse fit any aspect of the Kaylor love story?

In the winter, in the icy outdoor pool

When you jumped in first, I went in too

I'm with you even if it makes me blue

Which takes me back

To the color that we painted your brother's wall

Honey, without all the exes, fights, and flaws

We wouldn't be standing here so tall, so

This is also very not Kaylor lol except for the tall part. The chilled out hanging out and swimming and wall painting sounds more like the songs about Tily on Rep.

I like shiny things, but I'd marry you with paper rings

Uh huh, that's right

Darling, you're the one I want, and

I hate accidents except when we went from friends to this

Uh huh, that's right

Darling, you're the one I want

In paper rings in picture frames in dirty dreams

Oh, you're the one I want

This seems like it could be Tily because of the “we went from friends to this” (Kaylor were never friends, and had no intention of being friends, they’ve literally only ever dated). But I’m not sure Tay ever wanted to marry Lily? That’s not what comes across in the other Tily songs.

I want to drive away with you

I want your complications too

I want your dreary Mondays

Wrap your arms around me, baby boy

The driving and the chilledness is similar to the Tily songs but I’m still not sold. It really doesn’t feel particularly authentic.

Also, I know I mostly do lyric analysis but I’d like to include this quote from Tay about the song: “This song talks about true love, and if you really find true love, you probably don't really care what the symbolism of that love is. Material things wouldn't matter to you anymore if you found someone that you just wanted to live your life with.” The quote is distinctly hypothetical. “You probably don’t really care” “wouldn’t” “if you found”....

My gut says this is based around positive romantic relationships she has had but is extrapolated to a rosy conclusion. One day, Tay’s gonna want to marry someone with paper rings. But for now it’s a fictional hypothetical. None of the details fit any of her relationships. It’s made up. That’s why it includes the “baby boy” line... because it’s fiction.

And now for the really hot take… Lover is equally made up, although she was - again - inspired by her real relationships.

We could leave the Christmas lights up 'til January

This is our place, we make the rules

And there's a dazzling haze, a mysterious way about you, dear

Have I known you twenty seconds or twenty years?

This is continuing the themes from New Year’s Day which always strikes me as a “what if” rather than an actual ode to one of the muses. That final line seems like it could be about Karlie but the absolute calmness with which she sings makes it seem like it’s not about her. The mysterious way is also a brand new image and considering how much she sings about Karlie you would’ve thought we’d have had that image at least once before?

Can I go where you go?

Can we always be this close forever and ever?

And ah, take me out and take me home

You're my, my, my, my

Lover

I mean this doesn’t sound like Kaylor. Part of the anxiety there is always about going places together and being seen. It does have bits that seem like Tily to me; “take me out and take me home” kind of reminds me of the “meet me in the back” and “can we always be this close” seems similar to “is it chill that you’re in my head?”

We could let our friends crash in the living room

This is our place, we make the call

And I'm highly suspicious that everyone who sees you wants you

I've loved you three summers now, honey, but I want 'em all

The first three lines could be about either Karlie or Lily although I don’t know if Tily had “their place”. Kaylor definitely did.

That last line… is kinda why I think this is mostly fiction. I mean we know it doesn’t make sense for Toe. We know that. And I know about the gymnastics to fit it as a Kaylor song. But the thing is, even if she wrote it around the time that they went away to Wyoming, why wouldn’t she update it when recording it? It literally doesn’t fit the Toe timeline so it can’t be that she wanted it for that. She could’ve made it vague. But no she says “three summers”. Where else have we heard about “three summers”?

September saw a month of tears

And thankin' God that you weren't here

To see me like that

But in a box beneath my bed

Is a letter that you never read

From three summers back

It's hard not to find it all a little bitter sweet

That’s from Tim McGraw.

She just likes that image. It recurs. It’s not about Karlie, and it’s not about Lily, and it’s obviously not about Joe. It’s just a pretty turn of phrase. She loves counting in summers and Cruel Summers and the summer in Betty/august…. It’s not something she associates with one person.

Ladies and gentlemen, will you please stand?

With every guitar string scar on my hand

I take this magnetic force of a man to be my

Lover

My heart's been borrowed and yours has been blue

All's well that ends well to end up with you

Swear to be over-dramatic and true to my

Lover

This whole wedding bit doesn’t make sense for either Kaylor or Tily or Swiftgron. Like she’s constantly questioning Karlie’s commitment to her. And you want me to believe she’s singing vows? Lol no.

And you'll save all your dirtiest jokes for me

And at every table, I'll save you a seat

Lover

Very cute. Very non-specific. Not about any one partner.

So this supposed ode/serenade to Karlie doesn’t feature any of the images associated with her and doesn’t include any details that actively fit their relationship arc as described elsewhere except for jealousy and possibly love at first sight.

These three peppy love songs - which make up the minority of songs on the album - are about Taylor’s manifestations for the future. ITHK could be about the industry more generally. The other two are describing what she wants and what she pictures as ideal for a relationship.

So conclusions: a large chunk of the songs on Lover aren’t about romance. Many, many are about Karlie. Afterglow could be about Lily and some of the regrets Tay had about the split. Paper Rings, I Think He Knows and Lover aren’t about anyone in particular.

Last thought: I agree that It’s Nice To Have a Friend is about lesbians generally. But also possibly about Karlie, in which case the final verse is Karlie choosing the marriage with Josh and in that case the song is fucking devastating and heartbreaking. But tbh a lot about Kaylor is so it’s no surprise 🤷🏻‍♀️

---------------------------------------------------

As usual, I’m up to discuss this. Do you agree? Disagree? Let’s talk! xx

#tily nation where you at #tily #taylorswift #lyric analysis #lover #taylor swift #gaylor swift #kaylor #lover analysis

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aj-allen97 · 3 years

Text

Reactions on Jungles Cruise the Movie!!!

Spoilers!!!!!

Tears of healing???? Rapunzel is that you?

Wait is Disney mixing up their movies again? Or did they see the Healing Flower of the Sun and go sure people loved that let’s use that again!

So basically the Fountain of Youth?

So Conquistadors being Conquistadors?

I’m guessing guy in purple is the bad guy?

Yep definitely the villain.

😂 fare please 😂

Prince? Prince of what?

Whoa this guy just got homicidal over his name.

Ahhh the mighty jungle!

Ahh yes let’s bring our kids on the cheapest jungle cruise money can buy! I’m sure it’s safe!

Dude Move! If your that worried about being impaled then move!!!

The Dad Jokes! They brought the Jungle Cruise dad jokes to the film! And the jungle Cruise props animals!

Not only the cheapest but the most traumatizing!

The also brought over the back side of water jokes!!!

Cue Title Card!

Time for the Mistaken Identity dance!

CGI Jaguar ignoring at the easy fresh targets for the main characters trope.

I’m gonna bet that Prince in a purple suit that speaks German is behind the CGI Jaguar?

Ahhh it’s Frank’s CGI Jaguar reeling in new customers for Frank!

😂😂😂😂 Man has more luggage then his sister.

Brother also dropping the ball on keeping his sister safe.

The local salvaging brother dearest luggage - probably to sell.

Ok so we have Frank, Lilly, Lilly’s Brother, and Possibly German Prince yeah?

Leave the monkeys the monkeys are fine - Frank

She was on a roll Frank - she was on a roll.

I’m putting my money down on the fact Lilly can’t swim.

Poor Lilly can’t catch a break.

Called It!

Also check your person, make sure you still have the token necklace.

Wait is German dude a Nazi? What year is the movie set in again?

Is a submarine in the Amazon River possible?

So does Franks Jaguar live in the boats engine house? If so is he ok?

Technically Mr. Nino this isn’t Frank’s fault more like Lilly’s fault and that German dude?

Exactly!

Also it was sweet of Frank to include the brother in the hug.

Frank Finally found someone who found his jokes funny.

Maybe don’t put your fancy camera right there - it’s just asking to accidentally lose it in the Amazon river.

Skippy!

Piranha Dinner!

I feel like Franks gonna try to steal the arrowhead!

They were having a moment until it was broken by Frank’s Jaguar.

So would Lilly be the Rapunzle of this movie (both blonde, both be named after flowers/plants, both are linked to a magical flower?) if yes does that mean she becomes the flower?

So if Lilly is Rapunzel does that make Frank Flynn Ryder? And German Dude Mother Gothel?

Some one is cranky after their nap/death.

I feel like the Medusa Conquistador hybrid is gonna betray Nazi Dude.

So did Lilly have a prophetic dream/nightmare or did her nightmare just lined up perfectly with that jump scare?

Yep called it Frank wants the Arrow Head.

Poor Lily

Poor Jaguar got a hangover

Now everyone is sick except Frank

😂😂😂 the Log scene

Spy Snake! The best spy to use in the Amazon

Awww did Frank install kitty doors for his Jaguar?

Frank likes Motocars?

Is that Disney’s way of saying Brother is gay? Without saying gay and alienating certain audience?

Poor Lilly realizes Frank is shady?

Onion of Deceit

Uh oh tribal people - just when Frank and Lilly were making headway into their relationship

Ooh Fancy! Now I want a cool moving throne!

Brother may be a dandy but he’s got a punch to him!

Trader Sam is Back!

Brother Dearest knows his baby sister (is she baby sister?)

Well that’s convenient.

Why do I think Lilly needs to do a ultimate sacrifice?

Poor Trader Sam is stuck in between a lovers quarrel and she looks like she rather be anywhere but there.

Ahhh the snakes are back!

The heck? The heck!

Not just the snakes! But the Medusa Conquistador is also back!!!!

Wait? Was there a conquistador buried in the back of that throne?

So we have Medusa Conquistador? Throne/tree Conquistador? Honey Bee Conquistador? Mud (???) Conquistador?

Now they gotta find the Moon Tears so Lilly can pull a Rapunzel and save Frank

Ahhh the good ol River ex macia

Sooo…kind of like the curse in the first Pirates of the Caribbean Movie?

So wait? Is Frank Also immortal? Is that why he never returned home?

He Is!

Even the kids come to watch! 😂😂😂

This must be a normal occurrence for Frank!

Didn’t Trader Sam tell Lilly to stay away from the river??? Why did she go back to the river?

Poor Big Brother trying to shield young eyes only to faint himself.

Again isn’t this the plot of Rapunzel except instead of a sick wife it’s a sick daughter?

A chant! Just like Rapunzel hair!

Rock music appropriate.

And no one noticed Frank was never aging?

Poor Trader Sam stuck with Big Brother!

😂😂😂 Trader Sam just bailed! Can’t say I blame her!

They really should have brought brother with them!

Ahhh romance! Only took removing a blade from his heart to jump start it!

But not moving picture! Or automobiles!

And you don’t think Honey Bee Conquistador won’t end up noticing he’s a few bees short?

Wearing White Underclothes to go swimming in! I hope you don’t mind the male gaze

Well that was a quick swim lesson - so much for being afraid.

They kiss? Odd time to be doing that? Or is that a way to give her oxygen?

Technically “We” Frank.

Just accept her proposal Frank.

Ok Ok fine I get his reasoning.

Uh Oh

Welp the rest of Conquistadors are a coming!

And they will (hopefully) kill this German prince.

Ok so the brother is the baby brother?

So what’s with the singing? To freak them out? Cause I’ll admit it making me nervous.

Pretty.

But only Frank knows the chant. The chant is still important right? To make the petal work?

German Prince is impressed by Lilly

Where your Jaguar Frank. I feel like she would be really useful about now.

There she is!

Murder Cat!

She Got petal!

Here Comes The Conquistadors!

Go Frank Go!

How is that Dude still Alive?

Oops.

Oh hey now we got Wizard of Oz!

Frank we barely knew you

Ok Lilly go pull a Rapunzel and save Frank now.

What No Chant?

Lilly? How about True Love Kiss? You didn’t try that yet?

Oh! Petal worked without the chant!

Baby Brother approves of this union!

Frank should definitely bring back his Jaguar with him to London!

Magic? Sure these old men can accept that. Lady Chief? Gasp!

Women in the gallery! Heck Yes! Go Dr. Lilly!

So no more illness? They have cured every disease known to man with one petal?

#jungle cruise #jungle cruise spoilers #disney #disney+#emily blunt #dwaynetherockjohnson #dwayne johnson

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magnoliasinbloom · 4 years

Text

Crash Course Love

Claire and Jamie are together for one purpose only: trying to get over their previous relationships. It’s just a plan, isn’t it?

Infinite thanks to @lcbeauchampoftarth and @anna-swims for being awesome betas. There is no posting schedule, because life™. I hope you enjoy this ride.

AO3

1: Drink [Claire]

I slammed my tiny shot glass down hard on the bar top. It earned me a dirty look from what’s-his-face, the bartender.

“Hey… hey! Yeah, another one over here, please.” My words weren’t quite slurred yet, but I was getting there fast. Bloody fuck.

I swiveled on the barstool, just enough to get a real good look at the people who were milling around the crowded Glasgow bar. Which bar was I at again… Prince Edward? Prince Charles? Some royal name.

I was past being discreet. I craned my neck and checked out every booth and table just to make sure they were really gone. The bartender nudged my arm with my new drink and I felt for it blindly, never taking my eyes off the tiny dance floor.

“Cheers, Robert.”

“It’s Rupert,” he grunted.

“Whatever.” I pulled the tequila hard and fast, barely grimacing as it burned its way down.

“Och. Tha’ looks painful. I might have to try that.”

The voice came from my left, a slightly slurred Scottish burr. I turned slowly, wiping my mouth rather sloppily with the back of my hand. I squinted in the dim light.

His hair was the first thing I noticed. It was an attractive mess, and I couldn’t tell if it was the shitty lighting or his natural color, but it was so red it looked fake.

I realized I’d been staring at the top of this lad’s head like an idiot, before finally meeting his gaze. Deep blue eyes—a rare form of sapphire—looked back at me, also squinting through the haze of cigarette smoke and dim lighting.

Bloody fuck, he was a hot mess. I felt a twinge of equal parts guilt and self-righteous anger. I thought maybe it was a bit too soon for me to notice other attractive men, but the anger spoke up even louder. Why shouldn’t I engage in interesting conversations with random, gorgeous men? The anger in me won.

Wait, he’d said something. What was it? He wanted to do a shot?

“Um, it’s Cuervo. I think I might go blind if I keep drinking this, but that’s okay. Then I won’t have to see that arsehole walking around with that stroppy cow.”

Oops, overshare. At least I hadn’t hurled tequila and pub mix all over him. Yet.

Attractive blue-eyed lad raised his eyebrows. He was just as shit-faced as I was, maybe even a bit more. “Arsehole? Who would that be?”

Oh, might as well. “My ex. Turns out those late-night work meetings that went on for months were late-night sex marathons with Sandy. The arm-candy.”

“Sandy? The stroppy cow, I assume?” He smirked and tossed back the remainder of his own drink. “Which would make you…?”

“Claire. Spurned but pissed ex-girlfriend.” I held out my hand.

He took it in his and squeezed it gently. “Jamie, spurned and sad ex-boyfriend.” The tequila must have kicked in; my hand and arm felt all tingly and a warmth sparked in my belly.

“So. Any particular sorrows you’re drowning in cheap liquor?” I faced the bar again, looking at him out of the corner of my eye.

“Och, aye. But I daresay they’re halfway gone now.” Jamie shook his empty glass and the ice clinked. “My third.”

I snorted. “Fourth.” I held up my own shot glass in Ronald’s—or was it Reuben’s?—direction. “My good man, two please.” I glanced at Jamie, smiling wickedly. “You need to catch up.”

“Aye, but I really dinna want to risk going blind.” He called out to Rodolfo (Riley?), “Make it Patron, please.”

“Patron, huh? Is she worth it?” I caught his gaze.

Jamie’s eyes hardened, but I could tell it wasn’t towards me. “No. But I am.”

“Fair enough.” The glasses were placed in front of us and I raised mine to his. I stood, wobbling a bit and he did the same. “A toast—to Jamie and Claire. May their exes catch amoebic dysentery and shit till they die.”

“Amen.” He held his own shot aloft and touched the rim to mine. We looked at each other for a moment before we downed the golden liquid.

“Argh!” Jamie shook his head, making a face and coughing once. “Nice.”

“What were you drinking?” I nodded towards the chunky tumbler filling fast with melted ice.

“Whisky. I probably shouldna be mixing Laphroaig and Patron, but fuck it. I dinna care.”

Now both our eyes were kind of swimming and I stumbled into him as I tried to hike myself back onto the barstool.

“Easy there,” he chuckled. I straightened up, pushing away slightly. I gripped the bar top. The world was tilting crazily now. Bloody hell.

“I think that last shot was a mistake.” Now my words were blending together in strange ways.

“Aye, for me too.” His Scots accent had broadened more over the past minute.

I laid my head on the bar, not caring if my hair got dirty. I groaned, and I felt Jamie pat my back gently. “Um, thanks.” I managed to raise my head off the surface after a few minutes.

“Anytime.” He hoisted himself onto the stool next to mine. We endured silence for a bit until he grabbed a nearby salt shaker, tapping it rhythmically on the bar top. I waited.

The music suddenly changed; slow, mellow notes filled the air. I was about to make a snarky comment about the DJ’s song choice when I noticed Jamie’s hand next to me, palm up.

“Dance?” he asked softly.

“Only if you promise not to twirl me,” I found myself answering.

We made our way onto the makeshift dance area in the corner. He pulled me close, his hand at my back and the other clutched mine tightly against his chest. My left hand went on his shoulder as he led me expertly around the floor. My head threatened to drop, nestling perfectly into the center of his chest. God, he was tall. The alcohol was finally achieving its purpose, numbing me.

We swayed back and forth; I was still trying not to vomit as we danced. I found that the scent coming off Jamie’s skin was helping—something fresh like citrus, tinged with his own male musk.

“I proposed to her.” His warm breath tickled the shell of my ear.

I gripped his shoulder hard. He proposed? Jamie’s story sounded more fucked up than mine. He took my touch as a sign to continue.

“It was our 2-year anniversary. Fancy restaurant, candles, romantic shite—ye ken? Movie style.”

“What’s your ex called?” I slurred, surprised I could focus on a question.

“Annalise.” Jamie’s voice had a sneering quality as he pronounced her name with a French accent. “We’d met when I studied a semester abroad in Paris, but she actually lived here. After I’d pulled the ring from my pocket, and knelt in front of the entire restaurant—she said she didna want to hurt me, but that we should remain friends.”

“Friends. Classic. Only if being friends means you get to punch them in the mouth after a speech like that,” I laughed bitterly and he joined me.

“That was exactly a year ago—tonight. I just found out she’s dating some arsehole—something something Saint Germain. Hence, whisky.”

The song ended and Jamie looped my arm through his, and we collapsed at a table; barstools were a little complicated in our current state. I took a deep breath and reciprocated my own sob story.

“I walked in on Frank and Sandy a few months ago. In our bed. Bloody hell, we’d known each other since we were teenagers. We were living together. Was ‘I think we should see other people’ so hard to say?” I flagged a waitress, holding up two fingers.

“Och, lass, another one?” Jamie looked concerned. I was no lightweight, but I was really feeling the previous shots.

Fuck it.

“Yeah. I need it.” I sucked on a lime and upended the shot glass. I barely acknowledged the burn this time.

“That bad, eh?”

“It is.” I winced, remembering how I still hadn’t managed to take down the pictures of us. That was just bloody unhealthy.

“Oh. It’s really no’ my place, since, well… I’m completely pissed too, but… do ye drink this much every weekend, just to forget? I mean, I worry about yer liver and all.”

“No. It’s just I ran into the Frank and Sandy here tonight, who’s sporting a rock the size of a peach pit on her finger.” I swallowed hard. “And very, very pregnant.” Much too pregnant for their affair to have begun only a few months ago. She looked ready to pop.

“Och.” Jamie looked chagrined. “Aye.” He downed his own shot and gestured for more. He raised his glass in a toast like I had.

“To ye. Because at this point, I think yer story sounds worse than mine. And ye’re still standing.” We slammed a few more shots, until finally, sweet oblivion.

No more pain, no more misplaced guilt, no more what-ifs. A moment’s peace.

It could be found at the bottom of a glass.

- - -

Sunlight streamed through the pale, gauzy curtains. It felt like a fucking drill through my eyes.

“Oh God,” I mumbled, rolling over and trying to ignore the pounding like a sledgehammer between my temples.

I hit something soft and warm beside me.

My eyes flew open, light hitting me painfully. As they adjusted, I caught sight of a tousled red head peeking over the top of the covers.

Oh my God. Oh my God.

How did this happen?

#outlander #outlander fanfic #outlander au #CCL1 #claire is going to cuss a lot in this one #fake dating

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dreamer95 · 4 years

Text

The Right Moment

Summary, Who would of thought that a stranger would make you feel safe and loved.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You sat at your local cafe just thinking back on the past year that has been nothing but pain and suffering. You were so caught up in your own mind that you didn’t notice the young man sitting next to you. Looking up at you once he heard you sniffling. It wasn’t until you felt a touch on your shoulder that brought you back to reality, wiping away the tears that you didn’t know have fallen.

“Are you okay?” the kind stranger asked. You turn your head to look at him, only to be taken back by his beauty.

He asked you again and you took a deep breath, “Um. Yes, I’m sorry!” You told him while looking away. He looked at you for a while make you feel subconscious about yourself. I mean a hot guy was staring at you when you probably looked like a crack head.

“Are you sure? you look like you need a shoulder to cry on” He told you making you chuckle. “Well not every day is a good day,” you told him giving him a small smile.

“You know, I’ve been told that talk about it helps ease the pain,” he told you looking into your eyes. All you can do was melt into his eye, “I don’t know if you would want to hear my miserable life haha” You said chuckling at your statement.

“Try me,” he told you with a gummy smile.

You didn’t know why you spilled everything to a complete stranger but something about him made you feel safe. For a year now you have been dealing with a rollercoaster of emotions regarding your ex-boyfriend. He was your best friend at first but later turned into something that you thought would be special for both of you.

But it turns out to be the complete opposite, he made you hide your relationship, like if he was ashamed of you but he being your first love you didn’t think too much of it. Your friends would tell you he wasn’t the one for you that you needed to move on because he was only using you. But by the time you noticed it was too late.

You were so in love with him that every little wrong thing he did you just pushed it aside like it was not a big deal. It got to the point where people would tell you he was cheating on you and the girl he was with was pregnant with his kid but you told them that he would never to that to you.

Last night, you guys got into a horrible fight causing him to break your heart more than it already was.

“You think I actually loved you? No, I fucking didn’t you were just someone I could come to when I needed a quick fuck. You were stupid enough to believe that you were actually worth my time. And yes she is pregnant with my kid, we are getting married soon” Your ex said to your face, to broken to tell him something. The last thing you heard was him walking out and leaving you there like you were worth nothing.

By the time you were done you were in tears again but this time the kind stranger was holding on to you let you cry your heart out. Once you were calmed you pulled away, “I’m sorry I didn’t mean to ruin your shirt or spilled everything on you” you gave a faint laughed as you wiped away your tears.

“You know, your ex is pretty stupid to let go of someone so beautiful, kind and strong girl like you. You don’t need a guy like that to make you feel special, you’re special in your own unique way. Oh, by the way, I’m Yoongi!” He told you while wiping the last tear from your cheek.

“(Y/N). I told you my story without even knowing who you were haha” You told him. After a while of getting to know each other, you couldn’t help how he made you feel.

Days passed and you were getting ready to go on a date with Yoongi. You were excited to see him again. Yoongi took you to a fancy restaurant for your date, every time he gave you a compliment or did a cute gestured you couldn’t help but feel your heart beat faster it felt like it was going to jump out of your chest.

From the corner of your eye, you saw your ex and his girlfriend walking your way, you stiffened and Yoongi noticed

“Well look who we have here? (Y/N)! What are you doing here?” Your ex asked you while giving you a smirked.

“As you can see, she is on a date!” Yoongi fired back at him.

“Wow (Y/N) I didn’t know you had it in you to get a rebound!” Your ex said laughing. “Actually, I’m her boyfriend. Plus, why do you care your nothing to her” Yoongi said while holding your hand.

His girl turns to you, “Your boyfriend is Suga from BTS? You really expected us to believe that. You are just desperate for attention aren’t you. You paid him to be with you.” His girl laughed.

You looked back at Yoongi shocked; you knew he looked familiar you just couldn’t put your finger on it. Not it all made sense, but it only pissed you off.

“What shocked that I can actually do better than your worthless baby daddy?” You fired back making them look back at you with wide eyes.

“Oh, come one (Y/N) you’ve been in love with me for the longest time, I doubt you will move on from me that quickly” Your ex said while reaching out for you.

Yoongi got in front of you protecting you from his touch. “I was (Y/E/N) but looking back at the hell of a year you put me through made me realized that I hate you more than anything and you aren’t worth my time. I found someone that treats me with more love than you ever did. So, I wish you both the best but if you excuse us, we have a date to get back too” You told them taking a seat and Yoongi seating next you.

Your ex and his girl left without another comment and you were glad because for once you felt like you were going to explode.

You turn to Yoongi and you saw him smiling back at you. “So, you are from BTS? I thought you looked familiar” You said while laughing.

“Yea I didn’t think you were a fan,” he told you. “Are you kidding Jungkook is my bias!” You told him laughing.

He looked back at you and smirked, “I’ll make sure to tell him when I see him, but I will tell him that you’re mine.” The rest of the night felt amazing by the time it was time to say goodbye he gave you a long passionate kiss. After, that night you felt like you found your prince charming.

It was the beginning to your happily ever after.

-The End🦋

#min yoongi #min yoongi angst #bts yoongi #bts suga #min yoongi scenarios #suga scenarios #suga angst #min yoongi fluff #bts #bts scenarios #bts angst #bts fluff

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abloomntime · 3 years

Text

A Bloom In Time Ch8 Discovery P2

(Warning: Death Scene ahead. The third floor is the same cut third floor in the video here and all the things described are here as well. Only behind the door is something different for the story. And Snatcher's dialogue came from the video of the cut content as well. )

The guards marched the poor woman now panicking in their grip flailing about, trying to get out of their grip like a fly in a cold spiderweb to no avail. The two giant guards marched noisily towards somewhere unknown as the third floor rooms and hallways passed them as they marched with seemingly no regard for the woman yelling and pulling between them. Eventually marching down one hallways in particular with a double door room at the end of it, heavy and thick with chains and locks fit for a dungeon instead of a bed room. The two guards went right up to it and before Poppy could even yell out peck again- She was tossed in rather hard. She landed with a giant thud sound and yelped out as her body landed with the freezing cold floor. And it only began to get colder and COLDER!! Poppy groaned from the pain but those blue eyes snapped open at the sudden noise of doors slamming behind her. Panic and adrenaline pumping through her veins and she stumbled to her feet as fast as she could. The rattling of chains and clicking of heavy locks made her fear spike worse and she went to it as fast as she could grabbing the door knob and pushing.

"HEY!! WHAT THE PECK!? LET ME OUT!!" The heavy doors creaked from her pushing and pulling and desperately turning the knob. The floor shaking lightly with the heavy footsteps of the guards walking away. The realization of them walking away made her more desperate to get out, and she now went to banging on the door. "H-HEY!! DO YOU LUGNUTS HEAR ME?! I SAID I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING OK?! I DON'T KNOW WHAT I DID BUT IM SORRY OK!! PLEASE!! LET ME GO!! I SWEAR TO YOU I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING THAT CRAZY SHADOW LADY SAID!!"

She got no reply and could hear them getting and farther away, panicking she tore herself away from the door. Heart hammering in her ears and eyes scrambling around the dark room for any signs of escape to no avail. No windows. No other doors. Nothing. The coldness was starting to creep in now and the shadows of the room got closer....and closer...... Her panting became faster and in a moment of desperation, she backed all the way to the other side of the empty room and looked at the door. Bracing herself, she ran as fast as she could across the room and rammed her shoulder as hard as she could into the heavy duty door. A thud rang out but there wasn't even a dent in the thick would. Leaving her only falling to the ground and reaching up to rub her sore shoulder from the ramming. The cold slowly creeped closer and closer and the shadows swallowed her whole until her world fell into a black slumber for a thousand years. ....... ............. ................................

Until her awakening years later.

The silence of the frost was an almost empty numb feeling until that jolt of energy shot through, and their was a gasp of air sucked into those newly awakened lungs that coughed and sucked in breaths. Like she had been under water for such a long time. It was dark. And it was cold. And she was scared. But the energy.....It was so big. And so bright light energy. It seemed to chase the darkness away. The sore, numb, stiff limbs moved in what seemed like forever. It was so hard and she shivered from the cold she still felt. Where was she?.....What happened?.....What was that bright light?

Poppy weakly managed to move her sore, cold body into pushing her front half up and looking around the room....She was...She was still in this prison? What happened? All she remembered was a crazy snow storm, and guards, and the last thing she remembered just being thrown inside here. In the dark her slow blinking eyes could vaguely make out the door. She...She must've knocked herself out from ramming into the door. Gotta admit not her most proudest moment or best idea. How long was she even out?...Didn't matter. All she knew was that she was still stuck in that room and needed to get out before that crazy shadow lady or guards decided to come back. And get away from this frozen wasteland as fast as possible. Willing herself onto her hands and knees, and crawled to the door and began weakly pushing and banging on it. Maybe someone would come and hear her out about her story.

And someone came.

***********************************************************************************************

Out of all the parts of the mansion she'd been in, the third floor was by fair the most creepy and she REALLY doubted anyone other than her and Snatcher had ever gotten this far up in the manor before and escaped Vanessa's wrath. The mafia men. Snatcher's subjects. Those Explorer guys. Rough Patch. That weird....ghost thing?? That one image made her shiver, but at least they were far away from this place now. But still. This place was creepy with a capital C. She was SURE she'd rather fight a hundred Snatcher's with an army of ghost behind him rather than explore one room of this third floor. Her ghostly friend wasn't kidding when he said Vanessa went off her deep end. The entire third floor was just COVERED wall to wall in literal newspapers. Very, VERY old timey newspapers where each one had to be hand written with an ink and pen, and copy machines weren't even a thought. She tried reading one before but found she couldn't make anything out other than maybe one or two old faded words. Some had old pictures but those were too faded to be made out too. But what she could read was Vanessa's crazy black paint scribbles painted throughout the entire place. Most were 'PRINCE', 'PRINCESS', 'QUEEN', 'KINGDOM', and VERY scarily 'HAPPILY EVER AFTER'. Along with multiple drawings of a crown here and there. But those weren't the only writings on the walls. She guessed Vanessa had at least a bit of sanity left before she lost it all because she found some full blown sentences and pictures around the place when she first explored it too. Some very weird things. In one room with a clawed chair she found a blue and green picture of a moon she guessed with an annoyed red face and a yellow crown on it's head. Not too sure what that was all about. Then there was another drawing of the moon phases over a curved line and under it looked like two eyes and a monicule similar to Moonjumper's but she didn't wanna think about that. Then there was the spooky eye and solor system diagram. And then there was the weird mural thing, looked like someone just spray painted a basic green land, blue sky, and bright sun or moon in the same colors used to draw that weird frowning moon picture. Vanessa must've been REALLY off her rocker, but what spooked her the most weren't the pictures or newspapers, but the very strange three fancy cursive writing sentences she found among them all. She still remembered them.

"The Prince loves the moon so much MAYBE HE SHOULD MARRY IT THEN MAYBE HE CAN GIVE ME MORE ATTENTION!!" She remembered Snatcher and Moonjumper saying he loved to watch the moon and stars when he was alive. So she guessed Vanessa was jealous of him loving the moon and stars as a hobby just as much as when she was Jealous over bacon. "My prince Im sorry what happened to your home I just didn't like to see you go It's alright now you can't miss it and neither will I." Hattie felt even MORE sorry for the two ghosts when she read that. They never had a chance. "I know it was weird how I said it! I just didn't want you to get unbound. All I want was for you to never leave this house." YEP!! REALLY WEIRD AND VERY OBSESSIVE!!!

She still crept forward keeping her umbrella handy and looking left and right throughout the dark. Yeah, Vanessa was still unconscious, human, and trapped inside a bathroom with no escape, but that still didn't help Hattie feel better. I mean any second she was expecting to see or her stupid, scary ghost self pop up around a corner or coming out of one of the rooms. THAT LADY WAS NUTS!!! The small creaking sounds of banging continued up ahead and the child pointed the umbrella forward, ready to blast anything at a moment's notice. She wondered for a moment if Snatcher had been right, and there really was no one up there, that it was all just the wind. Though she never heard anything like that before, she also never saw anyone frozen so maybe he was right....But that didn't sound like wind. As she tiptoed by she saw an old camera and remembered Snatcher's interference with her trying to get the time piece from the attic. Who knew he could shapeshift to look just herself. She still remembered it like it was yesterday, a camera flash then came the noodle she knew and loved to mess with. He didn't like her winning too much.

"Hey, hey now! No reason to throw a fist at your old buddy! Ha ha ha ha! What are you doing up here?" Then he appeared in the light from the camera "Don't you know she'll go mental if she catches you?" NNnnnooo. Really? She would've thought Vanessa was just chasing her to come and eat cookies like she said, not definitely turn her into an ice statue. So she asked him what he was doing there interfering with the contract they had. "What me? Im just looking for some dirt on my old friend the Moonjumper. Poor fellow. Doesn't even know he used to live here." She SEVERELY doubted that. When she first met Moonjumper he seemed super aware of the fact Vanessa was his ex lover and Hattie suspected that Snatcher was just mocking him which confirmed her suspicions with the next sentence. "Eeeeevery time I bring him something from this place he almost wets his bed in fear. Ha ha ha ha!" YEP! Moonjumper def knew who Vanessa was. "Subcon Forest isn't big enough for the two of us you know. And now you, a little girl, is trying to enter the fight for the forest as well? My, my. That won't do. You need to go or else she'll come up here and find you, right? I guess it would be a terrible misfortune if the key disappeared. Ha ha ha ha!" Oh yes. The good mindset he had that everyone was trying to take his forest and admitted at first he thought she was trying t invade his forest since he heard a lot about alien invasions. Then she had to go around chasing him while dodging Vanessa when he stole the key to the attic from her. "Ha Ha! It's mine! What are you gonna do?Don't you know you can't hurt a shadow?" .....Yeah. She got it back, but he was a sore loser as always. "You want the key? Take it! It's yours! I don't need it anyway and you won't be needing it either when she catches you! Ha ha ha!!" Jokes on him! She never will and he always lost to her!

But right now she'd give anything to hear that loud mouth yell at her, or the sweet voice of Moonjumper. But instead she heard nothing but the sounds of the smaller banging like the wind hitting the roof over and over again, but it didn't come from above. It came from right in front of her. She crept forward ever so slowly, the lightning lighting up the room every few moments as the child tip toed her way down the hall and towards the noise until it lead her face to face down a long stretch of hallway. It was dark and lead all the way down to that weird heavily locked door she had scene when she first got here. At first she thought it was the attic but the key Snatcher stole from her way back when didn't fit, so she just assumed it was more of Vanessa's crazy stuff. But the noises.....they were coming from the inside of the door. The chains were swaying lightly with each small bang from what she could see from the lightning. The rusty chains and locks shone in the light as well as the giant signs painted on it that read "STAY OUT" and "NEVER OPEN" and "TURN AROUND". Since when did she listen to signs, she slowly inched forward and brandished her umbrella in front of her just in case. But now this begged the questions. Why was the door making the weird noise? Was someone locked inside the room? How did they get in there? Were they a bad guy? The floor bourds creaked with her footsteps as she approached and after a second the noises completely stopped-.......Which confused the child into raising an eyebrow and walking over to the door. Gazing across the many things holding it shut before gaining up the courage to ask a question.

"Hello?"

There was silence for a good long moment. Tho Hattie couldn't see it, the woman on the other side of the door felt like she was about to cry from relief and happily answered back after another few short seconds.

"H-Hello?"

Hattie obviously jumped at the sudden raspy woman's voice coming from the other side of the door, but after a brief moment she realized with relief it wasn't Vanessa's voice. Then who was it? Another prisoner? She stood on her tip toes ad if trying to peer through the key hole under the doorknob. "Who are you?"

Her. THROAT. WAS. DRIER THAN A SANDSTORM!! It felt like she hadn't drank any water in a hundred years, but she was SO happy someone was even talking to her. This might be the hope she was looking for. The other's voice was clearly female and Poppy wondered old she was. She sounded quite young. "M-My name is Poppy. P-Please let me out *cough cough* I swear I d-d-didn't do anything wrong!"

"How did you get in there? Did Vanessa freeze you too?"

Vanessa? Who's Vanessa? The only Vanessa she knew was the Queen, but despite the Queen's strange behaviors and laws, from the few times she'd seen her in the village she seemed like a lovely lady and the children loved her so much. "I-I d-don't know who Vanessa y-you're referring to, but some crazy *cough* shadow lady made two iron giants kidnapped me and locked me in here. I-I think I've been in here for a couple hours, b-but I assure you I NEVER committed treason against the Queen."

So Vanessa locked her up and froze her too? That sounded like something the crazy old coot would do after all. "Don't worry! Im going to get you out like everyone else!"

Poppy felt her face smile for the first time in hours since she got there. "T-Thank you! B-But hurry! Im not sure when the guards or that shadow lady's going to come back!"

Hattie looked up and around at the old locks and chains all keeping it together. Ok. She didn't have the key and didn't know where it was, probably only Vanessa knew and she wasn't about to go asking the crazy lady for a key, and she probably wasn't physically strong enough to pull them from the door even if they were old and rusty. Snatcher was definitely no use, he'd just flop over like a helpless teddy bear.......But there was one way she could think of.

"Can you walk?"

Poppy blinked at the question. "What?"

"Can you walk? You need to back off the door!"

"Why?"

"Because Im going to blast it open."

Blast it?! Did this child have dynamite?! Or a canon?! Or did she know some magic? Either way she was not about to get caught in the crossfires of this, so willing her sore and numb body, she dragged herself away from the door to the opposite wall. Her lower half felt like a bowling ball. it hurt. It was like pins and needles on steroids and her legs were really sore and she barely got out of the way before a loud BOOM! was set off behind her that knocked her down face first onto the floor and on instinct her hands slammed down on her head to protect her from the flying splinters of wood and metal that shot out into the room. The blast seemed to have shaken the entire third floor and their was probably no doubt anyone in the entire manor could've heard the blast. Hattie stared at the remains of the doors that remained on the hinges and hummed. Maybe she should've tried picking the lock first just oh well. She just hoped that blast didn't wake up ms goldie crazy locks downstairs. Still brandishing the umbrella, she crept forward towards the door and peeked inside the room once she got close enough hearing movement inside. Inside was a.....woman? A lady with long braided red hair and a face of matching freckles was sitting on her knees staring back at the little girl. Her hands in a position that made Hattie think she must've been dusting debris from the blast off of her and the two stared at each other for a moment before Hattie finally spoke.

"Who are you?"

Poppy stared at her for a moment before blinking and replying. "I could ask you the same thing. .....But to answer your question. My name is Poppy. Poppy Rose Bloomington. What's yours, little girl?"

She blinked. "Hattie." She finally lowered her umbrella a little bit and watched as Poppy struggled to her feet leaning against the wall. She certainly didn't look very threatening, and she didn't get any dangerous vibes off her. Her vibes were more like DJ Grooves only less fun. So she decided to repeat her question to her once she saw Poppy's wobbling legs. "Can you walk?"

Poppy nodded leaning against the wall, her legs felt heavy and like jello, but she HAD to get outta there. "I have no choice! We have to get the peck outta here before someone comes and does something worse than lock us inside a room." She gave another look around at the mess. "....But it looks like you can take care of yourself fine, Little witch."

Hattie smiled. "Im not a witch. I just used the magic badge thingy on my umbrella." She swayed her umbrella and followed as Poppy made her way towards the door. "But maybe I am. That could be why Snatcher used to call me a little witch. Can you be a space travelling witch?"

Poppy barely paid attention to the little girl but absolutely froze at the sight of the horrifying ruined third floor walls, and the darkness covering them all. ........This wasn- Lightning struck outside the windows and lit up the whole third floor for a minute, revealing the faded papers and words painted all over them. Wha-...What HAPPENED HEAR!? It didn't look like this when she was dragged up here a couple hours ago. There was still snow and the chilly freeze she surely remembered, but the horror tale was new.

"W-What happened here?"

Hattie bounded up next to her confused. "What are you talking about? It's always been this creepy. At least that's what Snatcher told me. He used to steal things and scare Uncle Moon with them." She gave the still frozen older lady a look over.....Did she..look familiar somehow? Nah. But that begs the question. What was she going to do now that she found her? Snatcher already told one of his helpers to take everyone to his tree house, and she didn't know any long ways around. Plus judging by Poppy's current state, she didn't think she'd be able to jump over the bridge. She'd just fall into the ravene. ........Well, it seemed like there was only one way to quickly get her out safely before she put the time piece back together was to take her back to her ship, at least until she cleaned up Snatcher's mess. Then she'll take her to Mafia town or something. Hattie grabbed the woman's hand, who flinched at her touch and started pulling her along down the hallway, but stopped when she felt Poppy stumble and almost fall over. "...Are you ok?"

Poppy Nodded. "Uh..Yeah. B-But maybe don't move so fast ok?"

Hattie nodded and eagerly began pulling her along down the wall and again Poppy began to glance around in horror around her. ....It surely wasn't this dark when she was first taken up here. How could so much change have happened within just a few hours of her knocking herself out ramming into the door? Things only got worse when the child slowly lead her down the stairs towards the second floor. Poppy vaugly remembering it as she was brought up and thrown in there, but she didn't expect there to be so many claw marks lining the walls, it was much better looking than the third floor for sure and at least with this floor there was candles lit so she could see but that still didn't calm her nerves. Who made these marks? The crazy shadow lady or something else? The creaking of their footsteps echoing throughout the halls, she hoped no one heard them-

"KIDDO!! YOU BETTER HAVE A GOOD EXPLAINATION FOR WHATEVER I HEARD UPSTAIRS, YOUNG LADY!!" "PECK IT, SNATCHER!! SHUT UP WILL YOU!?" "HEY!! IM NOT THE ONE WHO MADE AN EXPLOSION GO OFF!!" "WELL IF VANESSA ISNT AWAKE SHE IS NOW!!"

The loud voices made Poppy jump and release herself from the child's grip as she snapped her head wide eyed towards the direction of the voices she had just heard. One sorta distorted and raspy and the other like a proper city gentlemen yelling. The child however just smiled and began bounding her way over to an open door near the front of the hallway and stuck her head in. When Hattie looked inside she saw the two ghosts stuck together already looking in her direction, Snatcher making them scowl at her. She noticed the two had somehow taken the red blanket off the bed and threw it over their shoulders while she was gone. Messing up the bed but at least having something to keep them warm in the meantime. The book opened to page '23'. Snatcher was always a fast reader.

"Hi! Yeah, it was me."

"What the absolute PECK were you doing?! Trying to set the building to the ground?!," Snatcher demanded of her. Both Moonboy and himself had noticed the loud BAM noise from somewhere above them. It sounded like a cannon was shot through the side of the building above them shaking the whole house and if it weren't for their current state, Snatcher would've immediately ran up there and seen what had happened for himself, but unfortunately he couldn't without falling flat on their face and had to wait for approaching footsteps to know she was alright. But now she might be in trouble by the ghost. "Are you TRYING to wake the crazy pecker up?! I'd rather NOT have any crazy women screaming their head off about 'her prince' until Im back to normal!...What the PECK even happened?!"

"I found a lady!"

He rose a brow. "You found a what?"

Hattie jabbed a thumb behind her at the still frozen and confused Poppy. "I found a lady locked in that room upstairs. The one with all those scary locks, she's wearing a funny apron."

Snatcher was silent for a moment processing what he had just heard. A woman was inside the locked room upstairs? Who? Moonjumper thought of a possible solution really quick. "An apron you say?" Hattie nodded. "Hm. Sounds like one of the old cleaning maids." "Heh. Vanessa would be crazy enough to lock away a cleaning lady in a room with a ton of locks. But what was that noise?"

The child held up her umbrella. "The locks wouldn't unlock. So I blasted it to bits!"

"You blasted down doors to free a cleaning lady?"

''Hey! I said everyone gets to be free! And It's not like Vanessa can sue me. She's more empty headed than those no-headed statues outside."

"HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!" That got a round of laughter from Snatcher that made Poppy flinch outside. From her spot she couldn't see anything inside the room. Not that she wanted too, but now they were smiling. "That's the truest thing you've ever said, Kid!"

"Uh huh! Also, Ill be right back! I gotta take her to my ship!"

"What? You're leaving me again?!" "Us you creton. But you're leaving after just coming back?"

"Im just gonna take her to my ship so she's not turned back into another human-ice statue. And I won't really go back myself." She waved her umbrella at them. "Ill just use this to take her back outside, and come right back! Promise."

They stared at her for a moment, before she heard Snatcher grumble and turn back around down to their book. "Make. It. VERY. QUICK!! Ok? We can't just keep delaying this, Kid. I want OUT of this thing as soon as possible!! And that means NOW!!"

"It won't take long! Promise." She turned back away from the door smiling and ran back up to Poppy. The woman blinked and looked down at the little girl that grabbed her hand and started tugging her along again. "Come on! Don't step on any glass on the floor. I still have to fix it!"

Poppy didn't say anything but she allowed herself to still be dragged away by the child. Hattie lead her around the glass pieces and down to the next flight of stairs waiting to take them to the first floor, footsteps echoing around them. Poppy blinked and couldn't help but look over to the open door as they passed, Snatcher had already turned back to the book with a sour expression and didn't see who Hattie was dragging past the door, though Poppy had see someone wrapped in a blanket and a bit of brown hair sticking out of the blanket. Blinking she turned back to the small child still dragging her away and soon they decended down the second flight of stairs.

"Who w-was that exactly?"

"Oh! That's Snatcher. He's my dad. Don't worry about him being scary, he's just a big soon-da-rey." She giggled a little bit confusing the woman a little more. She had no idea what a soon-da-rey was.

The first floor wasn't as better from the first. Still cold. Still spooky looking. Still had random claw marks everywhere and she was still looking around in fright. Was that shadow monster going to pop out any moment? Where were the guards? In fact, where was everyone? She hadn't seen a single servant, guard, or even the Queen since she was broken out. Oh she hoped they were ok, she'd hate to know what would've happened if worse case scenario. And on that note of questions, who was this child? How did she and her father get in without getting hurt? Was she a little witch? She sure seemed like it with the blast she just performed. And where was she taking her? Outside hopefully, she'd rather be outside than inside this creepy prison. She glanced down as they passed by the painting Snatcher smashed and winced, Poppy did NOT want to stick around long enough for whoever did all this to come out. SO she rather take her chances with a little witch than a crazy shadow ghost. Hattie didn't stop even as she lead Poppy past the doors which made her turn in their direction and point.

"Where are we going? The front doors are right over there."

"I know but they're blocked up by this use snow pile and there's this headless statues that are REALLY creepy and they try to grab you. And I don't think Snatcher would like it if I blasted another door. We have to go this way!" She pointed ahead of them to yet ANOTHER flight of stairs that looked like it lead into the basement.

It gave Poppy an off feeling but she still didn't stop the child from pulling her towards it with their footsteps echoing behind them until they decended into the darkness of the stairs. It was overwhelming dark for a moment, before there was a splash and her whole foot suddenly felt wet and cold. One or two candles along the wall lit up the broken down walls and to Poppy's shock, there was water EVERYWHERE on the ground, must've been at least five or six inches deep because as she still allowed her shocked self to be lead through. Her Shoes and ankles getting absolutely cold and soaked, she hoped she wouldn't get sick from the cold. The cold stung herself and she looked around, their watery footsteps echoing around the home and she shivered at a pair of chains lightly clacking against the walls from the breeze coming from yet ANOTHER pair of stairs up ahead and they could see light at the end of the tunnel. As Poppy was lead up the stairs she blinked back away from the sudden cold that blasted her face and crept through her simple dress. As they reached the top of that stairway, blinding white caused her to blink and reach her hands up away from Hattie's grip to rub at her eyes. The storm and cold winds were still blowing, and as Hattie looked around she hummed. No foot prints left by the others, so she had no idea where they went and she'd have to stick to the original 'take lady to my ship' plan, luckily the dome's top let in the moonlight and a surefire way to let them get there. She'd get back by having Snatcher teleport her or using the time piece to teleport her back there, right now she had to hurry and get back to fix said time piece.

"This way quick!" Poppy stumbled as the child regrabbed her hand and pulled her forward almost making her fall flat on her face into the snow. The cold winds made their hair blow around with the snowflakes and the cold felt worse, especially on her wet feet and legs as they trudged through the snow at the insistence of the child until they were a couple yards away from one of the icy dome walls and far from the back of the manor. Hattie seemed pleased as she turned around and smiled at Poppy. Taking the hand she was holding and forcing the umbrella she was holding into it.Poppy blinked confused at the little girl making her hold the umbrella as she lifted it up to inspect it....before looking back to her.

"Sugarcube, I don't think this little thing is gonna be enough shelter from the wind."

"It's not for the snow! It's to take you to my ship! Here" She reached up and grabbed the umbrella, fiddling with something Poppy couldn't see because of the wind whipping her hand and snowflakes around herself before she released the umbrella again. "There! Now hold on tight and point it at the moon."

"Why?"

"Please just do it!"

Poppy sighed and looked up towards the moon through the snow and wind. Well, if this little girl really was a witch and trying to help her, maybe this was some kind of teleporting spell? If so she wasn't complaining about escaping the cold, so holding up a shivering arm, she pointed the umbrella up towards the mo- In a flash of blue-white light, Poppy vanished. In her place, a beam of that light shot up towards the sky and Hattie nodded. The umbrella successfully connected with one of the telescopes and she would be safe abourd her ship while she fixed this mess, which is what she seemed to do best around here anyways. Quickly turning back around, she sprinted back towards the manor. She had fixing to do. Poppy meanwhile was experiencing a whole new term to sea sickness, if she was really being teleported to a ship that is. The light and speed made her slam her eyes shut and her stomach sick. She felt like her whole body was being contricted into a thing twig and her knuckles turned white from gripping the handle so hard. She wished this would STOP- And it did. With a giant thud sound she was sent crashlanding to the carpeted floor of a child's bedroom where Bow was reading, worriedly waiting for her friend to come back but jumped and dropped the book at the sudden sight of a red headed lady suddenly crashlanding in their bedroom. The landy tumbled head over feet a few times before landing face first into the mountain of pillows the umbrella landing beside her feet. A few pillows were scattered with her collison and after a couple moments of silence......The woman groaned and weakly reached over to flip her onto her back. .....OK!! That was the LAST and ONLY time she was going to let herself be teleported by a little witch. Still laying on her back she slowly blinked her eyes open and was met with the face of another child with black curly hair. The two stared at each other for a moment before Bow spoke.

"Are you ok?...Who are you?"

#flowercrown #a bloom in time #snatcher x florist #Florist x snatcher #florist #The Florist #Snatcher #a hat in time snatcher #a hat in time florist

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marshmallowprotection · 3 years

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I read your tag about what if lila was shipped with saeyoung instead and it was so cute. i want to see him dressed like a lolita too! do you have any more headcanons on how it would go? 👁️ And what if Saeran was with Minji and Judas. What would that be like? I feel like Minji and Saeran would have a fun time cooking together. But its hard to imagine how Judas and Saeran bonding looks like.

I think I’ve talked about it before, but it’s definitely been a while since I’ve had the thought on my mind. So, let’s consider the possibility here and play around with the timeline and see what would happen if we swapped around the MCs in their relationships.

Now, I suppose would be smarter to start with Judas since he is involved with Saeyoung much earlier than Lila meets Unknown, or Ray, it just depends on the timeline. Judas, as we all know, is a former informant and would take power by gaining secrets using his body or his promises to get what he’d wanted. He was fixated on revenge and destroying his ex-boyfriend who was to become the next head of a Mafia ring.

He spiraled wildly out of control until he fucked up one day. He made a mistake and took down the wrong guy, and it landed a hit on his head. They saw him as a nuisance until he proved himself angry and crafty, and he knew he was rightly fucked. He made a deal with Saeyoung’s agency to trade his secrets for some kind of protection, but we all know the agency wanted his secrets and then they were going to kill him.

Judas actually met Minji one evening and escorted her home when she walked int the wrong side of town and that was what helped Saeyoung vet Minji when she appeared in the apartment. Now, if we were to say that instead of making one mistake, he meets Rika at some point and she wants him for his powers of true coercision. She sees his anger and righteous fury and loves it. He could make a good boy who deceives others for the cult. It’s hard to trick him, but I think if he offered to help him kill his Ex, he’d take it, and she’d trick the trickster because of his weakness.

That puts him interacting with Unknown very often. Judas loves to flirt and play around with others for fun. He, like Lila, tends to prefer fashion that is princely in nature and we all know how Unknown feels about fancy clothes and pretty folks. That’s a weakness. I imagine he and Unknown could both bond over revenge in a rather easy way. It’s possible there is tension between the two of them over a lot of power. Trust me, this is the only way that it’d work. They’re both angry and they’re both determined to destroy everyone that hurt them.

I can see them having this love-hate relationship where they argue a lot and it turns into I-hate-you-but-I-want-to-kiss-you tension. However, they both have a lot of vulnerabilities. They both have mother issues. They both want to be seen and noticed. They both craved to be loved. It’s easy for them to use each other to cope. Unknown would give Judas hell over the small height difference that they have and assert himself and Judas would bite back.

Now, if Unknown changed his mind at the last second with what he wanted in an assistant, and he took Minji instead... well, that just means that he’s picked Ms. Sunshine incarnate. Minji has a big heart and she knows nothing of suffering and misery. All she knows is that she wants to keep striving towards her dreams of being a baker. It’s odd with them because Minji is taller than Unknown is but he’d had a way of making her uneasy.

She might have questioned why she was helping him break into an apartment and he got the upper hand on her by surprise. She’s a lot stronger than he is so he didn’t get the slip-on her that’d be messy. She wouldn’t know how to act with him biting and being so patronizing at first. Yet, she’d help him because she can see that she’s got no choice. She decides to get to know him and understand Mint Eye better so she can see why he is the way he is.

I imagine Minji would be forced to spend a lot of time making sure that Unknown ate something other than liquid sugar. She’s hopeless at hacking. That’s what he would settle for. He would tell her what to do and she wouldn’t fight him but she would try to pick him apart piece by piece until Lila because she isn’t entirely in danger of being hurt.

Let’s see, her cheery optimism that doesn’t die bothers Unknown. She would do these kind things to him and he would be so fucking lost, man. His heart would pound wildly for some reason when she ruffled his hair and did things for him with no prompting needed on his end. I imagine that he finds that the longer that he’s around Minji, the more he feels like he has a partner that he can trust. That is until Judas starts pushing in.

Rika wants Unknown to get someone in that apartment right now. So, she pushes Judas to work with him and his new assistant to find out who would be best for this situation. Judas remembers helping Minji and flirts with her quite a bit, and Unknown warns him that she’s his. Judas is going to keep pushing his buttons and he’s going to keep pushing at Minji. It’s going to be tense and Minji is going to find herself working with these two guys, trying to protect the next person that winds up in the apartment she was meant to walk into—

And at the same time, she’s finding more and more that she’s got feelings for the two guys that she’s working with. Unknown is angry but when he has nightmares at night and needs comfort, he shows her that he’s got a heart. Judas helped her in the past and she trusts him, even if she’s lost in his hatred. Her kindness in the face of cruelty is to be admired.

I imagine this relationship is one where all parties have feelings for each other but are pretty torn and confused about how to bring the pieces together. In the end, if they’re able to be saved from Mint Eye, I can imagine that SE Saeran will have the most fun just devoting his time in the kitchen helping Minji and being her assistant, hilariously. She just makes him feel safe and warm. Who wouldn’t feel safe when their tall girlfriend scoops them up and dotes on them? Now, it would be harder with Judas.

I know that they’re going to have sassy banter and they’re going to be snarky, even catty. Their relationship is one where both parties keep pushing the other to their limits, and then they wind up kissing. It just works for some reason that I can’t explain. Judas can be very... high-maintenance but that doesn’t mean that Saeran can’t bite back.

Can you imagine their cuddle pile? Minji is in the middle and both of the guys are curled up next to her and it’s kinda cute, wtf.

Now on the flip side, let’s talk about what would be going on with Lila. We all know that Lila more or less left home after she had a big blow-up with her sister, who misunderstood just how much their mother was bullying Lila after she had moved away. It was a big spat. She left because she needed to... not be near the family anymore. She’s hurt and upset but she just wants to be as far as she can get from home. So, this is the first place her hand landed on the map and she went with it.

She’s insecure, and the only time that she feels like she can be herself is when she’s in Coordinate. If she’s not wearing a cute dress, then she’s looking at the ground and clutching onto the ends of her sleeves. She’s quiet, but she will say things if she has to. She’s also a painter that gets lost in her thoughts, I would call her paintings a blend of Rococo style and Impressionism if that makes any sense. The objects on the canvas feel Rococo but the style itself on the board is Impressionist.

Let’s say that she wasn’t the object of Ray or Unknown’s infatuation in this AU of yours. I think that Judas would pick her from the crowd and Minji would have given the idea to go and pick someone quiet and easy to manipulate, even if she didn’t say it like that, she gave him the idea. Judas takes it upon himself to bug her phone by tricking her and saves Unknown and Minji the trouble of getting her to open some phishing email.

She winds up in the apartment, just as confused as everyone else is and she realizes that she got tricked. She just wanted to help someone because she’s a selfless type. She’s lucky if she doesn’t have a panic attack from that happening, but that aside, I think Seven would realize really fast that she’s just a girl who’s from overseas who got tricked because she didn’t think things through. Her use of Korean is a little messy, too, which sort of helped the fact that it was easy to trick her.

You can Seven felt drawn to her the minute that he started looking into her past and her social media. After all, how can he not find a girl that spends her free time sewing and crafting outfits delightful? He can see that she’s hiding behind a mask just as he is from the start. She’s rather polite to him but he knows that it’s lovely to hear her laugh. She always humors his jokes and pranks for some reason that he can’t understand but it isn’t long before Lila sounds a bit sad whenever she talks to him late at night.

He means to say, how can she be so polite and straightforward on the chat, and yet, he’s got her laughing so hard she’s crying on the phone?

He probably won't get the answer until he’s locked in that apartment with her and there’s nowhere for him to go but the corner. Lila clearly is barely holding herself together but she’s biting her tongue and her fears to make sure that Seven feels like she doesn’t blame him because she doesn’t. She’s kind of blaming Rika for asking for a fucking bomb. Who asks for a fucking bomb?

It isn’t until Lila breaks down in front of him and admits why she feels so happy and at peace with Saeyoung, and it’s because his jokester mask reminds her of her big sister. Her sister is always smiling and laughing, but there’s a pain in her heart that she’s hiding. Whenever Lila talks to Seven now, she thinks about how much she misses her sister but at the same time, she thinks about how much pain Seven must be in. She saw him hear that everyone had lied to him and he had been hiding so much for the sake of everyone around him.

She’s able to confront him about lying about who he is. She tells him that he can’t hide behind a mask. That won’t make anyone happy, and it won’t make him happy. It’s what she failed to say in the past, and now she finally has the power to confront this problem head-on. She cares about Seven because he makes her laugh and forget about everything, but she also cares about those moments they have had where he whispers his fears to her and she listens to him say it all in the dead of night.

Seven has to admit that she’s right. He’s not happy, but he wants to be happy and nobody has ever told him that he has the right to fight for his happiness if he wants it. He tried to break her by saying that she’s hiding behind her own mask of some polite princess, and Seven pushes her outside of her bubble and all of a sudden, she’s been tested. She finds herself standing taller and looking people in the eyes, without fear anymore.

They push each other to bring out the good inside of themselves that they’ve been hiding because they were too scared to be themselves.

I can see Saeyoung and Lila as this couple that tests each other. He pushes her buttons and makes her believe in herself. She pushes him to be himself, and not once fear that. They’re supportive. Saeyoung gets to explore his gender identity more with Lila and boy, does he not mind being called she/her, or they/them, he isn’t picky, but there’s something about being able to dress up and be doted on in this fashion that makes Saeyoung feel good.

I HC him as NB/GenderFluid, have to throw that in there. I just want Lila to playfully call Saeyoung her girlfriend when they’re dressed up together and that redhead to turn into a mushy mess. I think there’s potential with the two of them to get along really well, I just never think of them in a romantic way because I’d fear that people would assume that Lila is projecting onto Saeyoung kind of like Yoosung does with RIka.

Oh, boy. I said too damn much.

#uno reverse #anon #ask #mod kait #long post #poly trio #saeran x judas #saeran x minji #saeyoung x lila #cmc #lila lancelot oc #judas choi oc #minji cho oc #i didn't even say all i wanted

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willow-salix · 4 years

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Isolation update!

Day 81 of Isolation on Tracy Island and we are all scarred for life. And it’s all Grandma’s fault.

We were alerted to the fact that something was going on when we heard music coming from the lounge. We could hear her singing along and she seemed to be really vibing.

Stupidly we thought it might be nice to share something with her that she was obviously enjoying. We will never make that mistake again. I should have learnt after the soap opera incident.

We trooped into the lounge half way through a song and the first thing we saw on the holoprojector was a woman in a black dress singing. But that wasn't the strange thing...

“Is that a cat?” Gordon asked. “And is he wearing a fancy suit?”

“She’s singing and dancing with a cartoon cat?” Scott frowned.

“Wait, is she dating the cat?” Virgil wanted to know.

We watched as the woman sang with the cat about how opposites attract.

“Well, they are definitely opposites,” John goggled. “But I’m worried about the attraction side of things.”

“That cat’s got some serious moves!” I grinned, trying to copy the dance and failing miserably.

The music video ended and another started.

“Oh, I love this one,” Grandma squealed excitedly. “I remember my mother playing these on the radio when I was a little girl.”

“Hey, I think I know this one too! My mum was the same, playing all the old songs when I was young.” I joined in, humming the first few bars. That was as far as I got.

EVERY NOW AND THEN I GET A LITTLE BIT LONELY AND YOU’RE NEVER COMING ROUND.

“Where is she?” Alan asked.

“Why are there doves?” Scott wondered.

“It’s full moon,” I chipped in. “That's never a good sign.”

“Her hair is huge!” Kayo whistled. “It’s like she put a poodle on her head.”

EVERY NOW AND THEN I GET A LITTLE BIT TERRIFIED AND THEN I SEE THE LOOK IN YOUR EYES

“What's with his eyes!” Alan screamed as the young boy on the screen turned to face the camera, his eyes glowing from within. And when I say glowing I don't just mean in a cute, beautiful way, I mean that he looked like when you pull the head off a doll and stick a torch up in there. Dang was that weird.

“Don't go down there, it's haunted,” Scott warned the woman in the floaty white dress who was running down a dark hallway in the creepy old mansion she was apparently staying in. “It’s always haunted in the movies.”

“He's got wings now?” Virgil asked.

“Gordo, swimmers!” Alan yelled.

“Why are there ninjas?” Gordon asked, distracted from the swimmers by the sudden appearance of masked ninjas bouncing here and there for no apparent reason.

“What kind of school is this?” John asked out loud, clearly more confused than he'd ever been in his life before and he'd sat through drunk conversations with me.

“Oh, that fancy dinner just got all kinds of creepy,” I gasped.

Grandma was oblivious to our horror, or she was enjoying adding to it by singing along really loudly and dramatically, sweeping her arms around like the big haired harpy on the screen. We ignored her as best we could, our eyes riveted on the screen that was traumatising us further by the second.

“Are they fencing now?”

“Someone let the circus in, there’s acrobats everywhere.”

“Her dress is so white, I’d never be able to keep that clean.”

“Oh look, the cool dudes have arrived and they are getting down to some moves on the stairs.”

“Apparently she really needs that guy…”

“Why do they not have shirts on? We wouldn't be able to wear that in our high school.”

"I know, what's the point of shoulder pads but no shirts?"

“Her hair is cushioning her brain, that’s why she can keep bashing against walls like that.”

“Is he naked?”

“Yep, wet and naked.”

“Yes, run away, love, run away!”

“There's glitter in his face mask, that’s weird.”

“That’s not the only thing that’s weird about this whole situation.”

“John, they have a situation.”

“What? They all have the eyes!”

“Ahhh he's flying, get away! Run while you still can!”

“Don't kick like that! That's ridiculous, you’ll poke someone's eye out with your big toe!”

“Well, he’s...bendy.”

AND WE'LL ONLY BE MAKING IT RIGHT

'CAUSE WE'LL NEVER BE WRONG

“You'll never be wrong? Who are you trying to kid? This whole thing is wrong!”

“Are they related to torchy?”

“They dance as bad as Alan.”

“Hey, cheap shot!”

“Don’t stroke her with your wings! That’s so cringey.”

ONCE UPON A TIME I WAS FALLING IN LOVE.

NOW I’M ONLY FALLING APART.

“Wait...is she a teacher?”

“Phew. it was a dream.”

“That doesn’t make it any less creepy, Gordo.”

“Wait...what? What’s going on now?”

THERE’S NOTHING I CAN DO

A TOTAL ECLIPSE OF THE HEART

“Ewww.” I hid my face against Virgil’s shoulder, far too creeped out to keep watching.

ONCE UPON A TIME THERE WAS LIGHT IN MY LIFE

BUT NOW THERE’S ONLY LOVE IN THE DARK

“The darkness was better, I promise you,” I mumbled.

NOTHING I CAN SAY

A TOTAL ECLIPSE OF THE HEART

“Turn around? Freakin’ Run!”

The song ended much to our relief and as one we all prepared to execute a tactical retreat.

“Well, I better go check on that thing.”

“Yeah, Dad wanted me to check it out too.”

“Well, I had better come along to make sure that-”

“Oh no,” Grandma cut in. “You can’t go yet, this next one is one of my favorites.”

We all sank back down, helpless trapped for the foreseeable future.

SOMETIMES I FEEL I'VE GOT TO...RUN AWAY

I’VE GOT TO...GET AWAY.

“Dude in bed, at least this isn't as weird as the creepy school,” Gordon commented.

“That horoscope is rubbish,” I huffed. “So generic, I’d never put that out, it’s lazy.”

“You've got standards,” Scott patted my shoulder.

“Yes I do!”

“Wait, who's that?” Alan asked.

“Is that a meteor?” Gordon looked at John.

“Not one I’ve ever seen.”

“Gahh,” Alan screamed. “Creepy star people!”

“Why are there always creepy people in these videos?” Scott shuddered.

“John, is that your ex?” Gordon asked slyly.

The glare John threw his way should have, by rights, killed the fishy on the spot.

ONCE I RAN TO YOU

NOW I RUN FROM YOU

“Yes, run away, that’s sensible.”

“Get away is a good idea.”

“Are they fireballs now?”

“Mystical fire balls,” I nodded.

The dude on the holoprojector had gotten up out of bed, avoiding the weird, floaty star people and was making a break for freedom… No, he was making for the fridge.

"Yes, drinking more will help this situation," I told him sarcastically.

"At least he's got jeans on now," Virgil pointed out.

"Why is that singer looking so pleased with himself?" Kayo asked.

"And why is he looking down on this and watching? Is he god?" I asked.

"Are you sure you haven't met them?" Alan asked John.

"If they touched me I’d throw myself out the airlock," he answered.

We cringed our way through the rest of the sing, not knowing what to make of it at all.

"Why are all the music videos so strange?" Scott had to know.

"I don't know," Grandma admitted. "It's just how they were, I think they wanted to make them memorable."

"Well I'll certainly not forget that horror in a hurry," John shuddered, spearing Gordon and Alan with a look that promised retribution if they dared ask one more question about his relationships with star people.

All in all we sat through twelve videos, watching a group of people doing a weird synchronised dance while singing about Prince Charming, another one about spinning someone right round, something about a chameleon and a particularly strange one about Rasputin that John insisted was not historically accurate at all. Honestly I wasn't listening to the words, my attention was locked on the very energetic bloke with the long beard who was dancing like a mad man at the front of the stage. And don't get me started on the strange guys in dungarees that were singing about someone called Eileen. I don't know what was going on but they really seemed to want her to follow them, they kept yelling at her to come on.

We escaped while Grandma was searching through her phone for some more. The second we got out of the lounge we scattered, every man (and woman) for themselves, our logic being that we had more chance of at least some of us managing to stay lost if we weren't in one big mass.

If I thought lockdown was sending people crazy… it's got nothing on the 80s.

#thunderbirds are go #thunderbirds 2015 #thunderbirds #thunderbirds fanfiction #social isolation #isolation #isolation island #thunderbirds in isolation

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joanofarchetype · 5 years

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A Connecticut Yankee...a kid...that's all well and good but we really don't talk enough about the werewolf in King Arthur's court

This is not a shitpost — in Le Morte D'Arthur, Sir Thomas Malory makes mention of "Sir Marrok, the good knight that was betrayed with his wyf, for she made hym seven yere a wer-wolf". Of course, Malory lifted the tale of the werewolf knight straight outta "Bisclavret," which is one of the Twelve Lais of Marie de France. And it is...wild. There's also "Melion," an anonymous Breton lai which along with "Biclarel" is believed to have evolved from the same source as "Bisclavret". In this post we're gonna refer to the protagonist as the "knight" or the "wolf-knight" and tell a somewhat composite tale.

(A note: this takes place well before commonly established werewolf lore, which crystallized thanks to Universal's The Wolf Man. Curt Siodmak wrote all that stuff about the full moon and silver bullets in 1941 so well that our common imagination accepted it as ancient fact.)

So anyway our guy is a knight who disappears for a couple nights a week and his wife is like ?????? dude ??????? where ??? do you ???? go ??????

And my dude is like "babe I love you but I can't tell you because you won't look at me the same" and she's like "I am your wIFE you better tell me right quick or otherwise have a good nose for almonds in your oatmeal" (jk she doesn't say that because if she did he might've gotten a little foreshadowing of her treachery, but alas, our man was a sucker)

So the knight tells her he's a werewolf, and on the nights he disappears he's wolfing around the countryside and his wife is like !!!!!!!!!! on the inside but makes sure her face is only 🤔 on the outside

(Mind you, Marie de France goes into how the wife is grossed out because she shared her marriage bed with a beast, which has some interesting implications but we'll get to those later)

She starts digging about his transformation until he explains how in order to return to his human shape, he *needs* to put his human clothes back on or else he'll be stuck as a wolf, at which point wifey is 👀👀👀👀

Wifey's like, "but if ur in wolf form, how do u remember where u put ur clothes lol" and the knight's like, "no no, I retain my human mind even in wolf form and besides, I always put them under this one rock outside this cave"

now bear in mind he's never been able to talk about this to anyone so he's pouring his heart out about his deepest secret which he kept even from his wife & I know we're all pretty used to medieval repression but imagine how it must have felt to share this secret at long last 😥

So to recap:

knight: 🤵🏻🛡🐾🌕🐺🤫😅😍♥️💐 wifey: 👰🏼💭🤢🤔👀🧐💡💡👔💍🔪🔪🔪

Our knight is like "yeah so I was born this way and it's just a part of who I am and whew it's kind of a relief to finally be talking about it with someone"

Wifey nods along 🤔🤔🤔 because she's had a💡moment and is 🍳 up a plan...

so the knight has unleashed (pun intended) his secret for the first time in this life and is feeling just dandy, but what he doesn't know is his wife is already plotting his downfall with her...LOVER (dun dun dunnn)

wifey & her secret lover steal the knight's clothes when he's transformed, essentially trapping him in wolf form, get him declared dead in absentia, marry each other & take over his lands

and the royal court goes for this because at this point the whole kingdom knows about the knight's habit of disappearing for days at a time (because medieval nobles are messy gossipy bitches who live for that drama) so they just assume he abandoned her

*~*ONE YEAR LATER*~* (or if you're Malory, *~*SEVEN YEARS LATER*~*)

the king & hunting party corner the wolf-knight in the woods. knight is overwhelmed at the sight of his monarch & runs up to what for all he knows might be his oblivion to kiss king's feet at which point king's like, "THAT'S NO ORDINARY WOLF. HE SHALL JOIN MY COURT IMMEDIATELY."

the wolf-knight goes to live at court where he's basically regarded as a knight (so the takeaway from this part of the lai is that a literal wild animal had a better chance of becoming a knight in ye olden days than a peasant or a woman but I digress)

anyway so there's a celebration at court and who comes to the party but the ex-wifey's new husband, now a baron. understandably, the wolf-knight does NOT react well and attacks him, and the reaction of everyone at court at this near-mauling isn't to say "whoa whoa maybe bringing a wolf to court was a bad idea" but rather "huh, this wolf has never been hostile towards a human before so obviously this guy must've personally wronged him." which is...progressive.

so the new husband/baron/co-conspirator is all "wtf keep it away from me" and the king is like "idk man, what were you wearing? maybe you smelled like royal beef jerky at the time. seems like you were asking for it"

king & the other barons take wolf-knight to the new baron's property. they just need to figure out what's going on because they're not ready to take sir wolf to his final veterinary visit, u feel? they're attached. now get ready for this next part because it's a doozy.

ex-wifey hears about the king's visit so she's waiting with gifts & cakes & shit. the wolf-knight sees her & immediately BITES OFF HER NOSE & he bites it so good her progeny can feel it & henceforth all her descendants are — I SHIT YOU NOT — born noseless. talk about losing face.

under questioning (*cough cough* torture *cough*) the wife admits to her crimes & yields the stolen clothing, which they put in front of the wolf & he just stares at them until they realize "wow yeah sorry dude our bad" and leave the room to give him privacy

when they see the wolf-knight again he's in his human form and in Marie de France's "Bisclavret" it's expressly written that the king embraces him in the bedchamber and gives him "many kisses" (hashtag heterosexual friends doing heterosexual things)

the king restores the wolf-knight's lands and ex-wifey has to live with her ex-baron in exile, forever marked for her betrayal. some real Mark of Cain shit. (obviously this lai has a lot to say about spousal dissatisfaction but that’s another day’s dissertation)

the wolf-knight (Bisclavret, or Melion, or Marrok, or Sir Wolf or whatever you fancy calling him) not only regains his good name, but also the support of a court which now knows his secret dual nature.

something to be hated or feared, only understood and accepted. no one at court shuns him once the secret's out & no one tries to change or "heal" him of his lycanthropy.

remember when I said we'd come back to the wife's reaction? in "Bisclavret" Marie de France specifically states that upon finding out his secret, the wife no longer wishes to "lie beside him." let's unpack that a bit by exploring similar themes across folklore.

the marriage bed serves as a common motif in tales of animal transformation. ex: in "Beauty and the Beast," the protagonist has to overcome her revulsion towards her suitor's ostensible monstrosity before she can accept his marriage proposal. traditionally these stories with mysterious, beastly husbands who are secretly a true catch serve as an allegory for arranged marriage, designed to help young women process their anxieties about being passed from their father's house to that of a strange new husband.

(we should differentiate these tales from those of an ostensibly appropriate groom who turns out to be a monster in disguise such as "Bluebeard," "Mr. Fox," and "The Robber-Bridegroom," as those deserve a detailed thread of their own but also provide good thematic contrast here)

more often the Beast is kind, patient & gives Beauty the time she needs to the detriment of his own freedom from the curse. once the protagonist gets over her anxiety, she ceases to perceive her groom as just a hulking hairy beast and he can take the shape of a prince at last.

circling back to wolves! in most lore both ancient and modern, werewolves represent something uncontrollable; an animalistic second nature which threatens to literally tear through our well-mannered social façade. "Bisclavret" and its various incarnations don't do that.

if you read "Bisclavret" under a queer critical lens, you can interpret the knight as bisexual; a husband has a secret duality to his nature which he is unable to express in their current social order. significantly, he is born with his lycanthropy rather than being afflicted by the sudden, violent means through which most fictional werewolves are afflicted. it's a part of who he is, and it requires no further explanation or cure.

the wolf-knight finds freedom rather than shame in his lycanthropy, and as a result maintains both honor and control while in wolf form. unlike other famous werewolves, he doesn't function as an expression of tension between the id and the superego.

considering how often wolves are used to imply sexual violence (see also: "Little Red Riding Hood" or its medieval predecessor, "The Grandmother's Tale") this would be a fairly positive portrayal of a bisexual man.

however, his wife doesn't see it that way and is repulsed at the thought of sleeping with him again, so she commits adultery and conspires against him. so really, the crimes in "Bisclavret" have a lot to do with sex, just not sexual violence.

the king's attachment to the wolf & the way he embraces the knight can easily be read as homoerotic. there's absolutely an argument to be made about the normalization of homosocial behavior & male kinship across eras but...two things can be true. either interpretation is valid.

so what we have is a werewolf protagonist — not a villain or tortured anti-hero but an honorable man who isn't made to shed his lycanthropy at the end of the tale (tail). rather, he is accepted by his contemporaries and given a place in society to live as he truly is/ROLL CREDITS

#bisclavret #marie de france #medieval literature #queer theory #queer critical theory #medieval lgbtq #werewolves #werewolf literature #i originally posted this to fb & then twitter so u can find these there #my twitter handle is also @joanofarchetype #(it's my pinned tweet)#long post #gif warning

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shadowthrone-ammanas · 4 years

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Ghost Kid Chapter Thirteen: Greetings

This is where I started pretty much 100% making stuff up as I go because I had a vague idea for this fic up until this point and Mu seeing Hat Kid again. When I wrote this and onward, it's all new to me, excluding the Mu and Hat Kid scene. So I guess in a way you could say the adventure starts here, we'll all see where this goes and what happens and hopefully it's good. I'm having fun writing it though so how good it is doesn't really matter, especially since the big cushion of chapters I have already written means I have plenty of time to edit and fix things that need fixing to make them as good as I can without driving myself insane. I hope y'all continue to enjoy it. :)

Hat Kid may have gone around the forest, telling every Subconite and dweller she came across that she was officially a resident of Subcon now too; she’d signed a contract and everything. She was welcome here; this was her new home. It was… strange to be so relieved about that after all the work she’d put into gathering the Time Pieces so she could leave. That had been before her death though, before she’d technically failed the final test to become an official space pilot. She’d miss her one friend at the school – everyone else in her classes had been older and had thus resented her for being better and younger than them – but… that was okay; Bow would do just fine without her.

It was nighttime – or the darker part of night, depending on how one viewed the everlasting magical darkness in the forest – when she finally returned to her ship, still supported by Snatcher’s magic vines. She’d have to talk to him about building a space dock here soon because even if this was her home now, she still wanted to go out and visit other planets sometimes. Maybe Snatcher would even be willing to come with her on a few adventures. That would be exciting! They’d probably have to be short adventures though because he needed to protect his forest from his crazy ex and other people who might try to do bad things to it if he left for too long but…

“Subcon’s newest resident, hello.”

She froze, her hand reaching for the door on top of her ship. She looked up and around but… no one was here. Unless they were under the ship.

A form appeared before her; grey skin, strange shaped head, tattered clothing that had perhaps once been fancy, very strange eyes, and no legs. And… were those chains on his wrists? “When one greets you, typically you are expected to return the greeting,” he said.

“Uh… hello?” Hat Kid wasn’t sure about this but… this guy wasn’t necessarily a bad guy. “Who are you?”

“I am Moonjumper. I hail from the horizon” He put a disformed hand to his chest and bowed slightly. “You go by Hat Kid, correct?”

“Yeah, how do you know that?”

“I’ve been watching you and Lukas. He’s basically adopted you even though he won’t admit it. It’s very cute.”

“Uh…” Hat Kid took a ‘step’ back, suddenly even more unsure. “I don’t know anyone named Lukas.”

Moonjumper grinned. Whether it was an actual malevolent grin or a mischievous one that just seemed evil because that’s how his face looked, was hard to tell. “But you do, you just don’t know that that’s his name.”

There were a lot of people she didn’t know the real names of – everyone on this planet seemed to want to go by their title for some reason expect for maybe DJ Grooves and that was probably a stage name – but there was really only one person he could be talking about, right? He hadn’t basically adopted her but he was definitely being very accommodating in letting her stay in his domain. “You mean… Snatcher?”

“Bingo.”

Oh! … Hat Kid lifted her hands to hid the grin coming to her face. She knew Snatcher’s real name! … How she’d found out was kind of dirty though, wasn’t it? It’d been given to her by this stranger who was probably telling her to annoy Snatcher. Unless he was lying… she’d have to test it later.

“I can see you are very happy to know that,” Moonjumper said. “Would you like to know more?”

Yes! But… “How do you anything about him at all?” As far as Hat Kid could tell, Snatcher was very secretive about everything having to do with his past. So much so that even the people who knew the tale of the prince and Queen Vanessa didn’t know the prince’s name or that he was Snatcher – she’d had to piece that out herself based off what she’d learned when she’d visited the manor. And even then, she hadn’t been sure until she’d confirmed it with him.

“His body is the vessel I am currently inhabiting.” Ah! Mystery solved at last! Was that a good thing or a bad thing though? “So, I know everything about him from when he was alive. He always wanted a daughter; seems he finally has one.”

It took Hat Kid a second to realize what he must mean by that. “I don’t think he sees me as a daughter.”

“Hmm… maybe not but maybe so too. It has been a long time since he lost this body. He’s changed since then, not as much as he thinks though. I believe he still secretly wants a kid, someone to pass his wisdom on to. … Not that he’s very wise, he just thinks he is.”

Hat Kid couldn’t exactly argue with that. But one thing she could argue with was… “Why are you just now introducing yourself to me? Can you only talk to official Subcon residents?” As much as she was enjoying learning about Snatcher, she also needed to know more about Moonjumper.

“Well, this is embarrassing but… when you first showed up, I was sleeping.” Meaning he wasn’t a ghost, right? Ghosts couldn’t sleep… except the Subconites could because they were possessing dolls and Moonjumper was possessing something too. A dead body but that probably still counted so… maybe he was ghost. “Not being able to pop in on you when you first entered kind of ruined my grand entrance idea so… I just let it go. But this is your home now so I need to introduce myself eventually. Besides, I’m getting rather bored, sitting around doing nothing, it’s time for something new.” He grinned again; mischievous or evil, it was still impossible to say for sure.

“Well uh… hello then. It’s good to finally meet you.” Copying his earlier move, Hat Kid put a hand to her chest and bowed slightly. “Thank you for telling me stuff about Snatcher.” She still wasn’t sure she trusted him or believed the things he’d said but… he didn’t seem too bad… maybe. She’d have to talk to Snatcher about him later. Not that Snatcher was the most reliable source of information on whether or not someone was good or bad since he disliked a lot of people for no reason and more often than not pretended to dislike the people he did like because he was just like that. “Can you tell me more?” She probably shouldn’t ask for more info but… she wanted know and it’s not like Snatcher would ever tell her anything about himself.

“Hmm…” Moonjumper lifted a hand to his chin in thought. “You probably already know he’s lawyer. He was known for being shrewd and sometimes harsh but fair and overall kind when alive. He was happy once upon a time too before Vanessa got her hands on him. She drove all his friends away, separated him from his family and orchestrated many of their deaths. Part of Lukas suspected but he didn’t know so I guess I don’t know for sure either. But I think she did, he just lied to himself about it because he’d convinced himself she was an angel. She’d sunk her claws so deep into him, escape would’ve been painful and he wasn’t willing to go through with it. Because of her, he even considered committing suicide a few times. Not seriously, mostly just idle thoughts, but if he had then maybe…”

“Please stop,” Hat Kid interrupted. That… wasn’t the kind of stuff she wanted to know. “That’s horrible, how can you sound so… so… like you don’t care?”

Moonjumper chuckled. “He’s the one who fell for her lies and false faces. He could’ve left at any time. He also considered that a few times when she first started isolating him and taking over his life, showing her true colours. He never did though even when his one last friend told him to over and over again. He got mad at her instead and she eventually died because of him, pretty horribly too, I think. In a way, everyone in Subcon died because of him. If he’d just…”

“Stop,” Hat Kid interrupted again. “Why are you telling me this?”

Moonjumper shrugged. “You wanted to know more.” And apparently, he just liked being an upsetting asshole.

“Well… I don’t want to know anymore. And… and… it’s not even your stuff to tell. Also, it’s not Snatcher’s fault so don’t blame him.” She didn’t know the specifics of what had happened but she did know that Snatcher couldn’t be held accountable for Vanessa’s actions. “So, stop it.”

Moonjumper chuckled. “Whatever you say young one. I suppose I will see you later. Good bye for now.” He winked before his form faded and disappeared.

Hat Kid crossed her arms as she looked all around at the burning forest surrounding her and her ship. He was gone, no trace of him remained. Was he still watching somehow though? … Possibly. Didn’t matter though, did it? She needed to go talk to Snatcher, confirm some things, apologize for other things.

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#My Writing #ahit #A Hat In Time #ghost kid #ghost kid fic #Moonjumper is here to play at last #what mischief will he get up to?

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ladyherenya · 4 years

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Books read in April

I probably spent more time reading but I also read a handful of novellas and a couple of children’s novels, which means I read more books than usual.

Many of these were, if not outright retellings, than heading close to that sort of territory: faeries and fairytales, Sherlock Holmes, Jane Austen, and Norse gods...

Favourite cover: Masque, maybe.

Reread: Nothing, too busy reading new things...

Still reading: Cinder by Marissa Meyer.

Next up: There’s a new Murderbot novel out in early May!!!

(Longer reviews and ratings are on LibraryThing and Dreamwidth.)

The Long Dark Tea-Time of the Soul by Douglas Adams (narrated by the author): Adams’ descriptions are clever and unexpected, and he strings together a series of events even more bizarre and unexpected than his descriptions. Sometimes I felt exhausted on behalf of his poor protagonists, bounced from one mishap to another, but I was impressed by Adams’ ability to turn this madness into such a coherent story.

Flamebringer by Elle Katharine White: A solid, tense conclusion to Heartstone and Dragonshadow. However, I suspect it would have made more of an impact had I read the first two books recently. It assumes that the reader remembers more worldbuilding details -- about history and family connections and magical folk -- than I did. And because I found such details confusing, I didn’t pay close attention to some of the history and politics revealed in this book, and those things turned out to be unexpectedly important. A trilogy in much need of a glossary.

Hamster Princess: Harriet the Invincible by Ursula Vernon (aka T. Kingfisher): A very amusing take on ‘Sleeping Beauty’. Upon learning of her curse, Harriet accurately concludes that she must be invincible until it strikes -- and when the time arrives, she’s determined to avoid falling into an enchanted sleep. This is heavily-illustrated. The pictures are great, but were often awkwardly displayed in the Libby e-book.

The Art of Theft by Sherry Thomas: More of a heist story than a murder mystery, which may explain why I found it less compelling than The Hollow of Fear, although admittedly, it has its suspenseful sequences. Thomas does some interesting things in expanding her portrayal of the era as well as Mrs Watson’s story, taking Charlotte Holmes and her trusted associates to France on a mission along with someone from Mrs Watson’s past. I liked that Livia gets to play a more active role in those adventures. But I expected to like this more.

Love Lettering by Kate Clayborn: Meg is desperate for inspiration and company. She comes up with a project, looking for hand-lettered signs around New York, and invites along a former client -- who has turned up to question Meg about the hidden message in the wedding program she designed for him and his ex. A story about signs, secrets and the importance of having difficult conversations. I liked how those themes are explored in different areas of Meg’s life: making an effort to get to know Reid, setting boundaries with a new client, and trying to stop her best friend from drifting away.

Once Upon a Marigold by Jean Ferris (narrated by Carrington MacDuffie): Christian was brought up in a cave by Edric the troll, who discovered Chris hiding in the forest. Now Chris is in love with the princess Marigold, with whom he has exchanged letters carried by pigeon but has never met. If I had discovered this in 2002 when it was first published, I suspect I’d have been delighted by its gentle, whimsical, almost-fairytale-ness. These days I tend to want more complexity and more emotion and, often, more critical engagement with the genre’s tropes. But this was still pleasant company while I did a few hours of housework.

The Shards of a Broken Sword novella trilogy by W.R. Gingell:

Twelve Days of Faery: King Markon’s son appears to be afflicted by a strange curse, because accidents and misadventure befalls any girl the prince flirts with. When an enchantress offers to deal with the curse in exchange for the expected reward of the prince’s hand in marriage, Markon gets swept up in her investigation. This is so much fun. I liked the way it focuses on a middle-aged father, rather than any of the more usual candidates for this sort of story, like his son or any of the young women affected by the curse. And I enjoyed Althea’s confidence and practical competence.

Fire in the Blood: Another story interested in twisting fairytale tropes. A prince sets out to rescue a princess from a tower, but neither of them are the protagonist -- that’s Rafiq, the prince’s enslaved dragon, forced into human-form. Rafiq has been dragged along on this quest and quietly hopes that his vicious master will fail to unravel the tower keep’s protections. I enjoyed this. The tower keep, with its magical puzzles, was an intriguing setting, and it was rather satisfying to see Rafiq and the princess’s serving girl subtly undermine the prince’s efforts without drawing his ire.

The First Chill of Autumn: The first two standalone and take place over a few days. This does not. It begins with Princess Dion’s childhood. At seventeen, Dion is sent on a tour of her country and discovers the truth about the Fae’s influence. She ends up joining forces with characters from the previous books. I liked each of these sections. However, this could easily have been expanded into something novel-length and been stronger for it. If more time had been given to Dion’s relationships -- with her sister, Barric and Padraig, and maybe her parents -- the ending would have made more of an emotional impact.

“A Tale of Carmine and Fancy”: This short story takes place during The First Chill of Autumn. I didn’t care about Carmine one way or another when he turned up in the trilogy, so I was surprised by how much I enjoyed this.

A Posse of Princesses by Sherwood Smith (narrated by Emma Galvin): Sixteen year old Rhis is one of many princesses invited to attend festivities held in honour of a crown prince. My first impression -- a nice-but-unremarkable story with an irritating audiobook narrator -- quickly changed. I got used to the narrator’s voice. I really appreciate Smith’s portrayal of social interactions and of group dynamics from the perspective of someone who is trying to understand why others are competing for attention. And once the plot took off, I was hooked. I have mixed feelings about the very end but that didn’t change how much I liked the rest of the story.

The Two Monarchies sequence by W.R. Gingell:

Clockwork Magician: Several years after Blackfoot, Peter starts at university. Because Peter ends up messing around with time-travel, there are scenes from his future in the previous books. It’s interesting getting those moments from Peter’s perspective and fitting the puzzle pieces of his story together. I also felt invested in Peter’s journey even though he spends a lot of time being arrogant and oblivious, because I knew that there must be a significant change up ahead. The way his dawning realisation is handled was unexpectedly satisfying. I also enjoyed seeing more of Poly and Luck, and getting to know Glenna.

Masque: A murder mystery which turns into a Beauty and the Beast retelling. Lady Isabella Farrah is determined to investigate after a friend is killed at the Ambassador’s Grand Ball, even if doing so annoys the official investigator, the masked Lord Pecus. Isabella is excellent company. She’s quick-witted, resourceful and uncowed. I really enjoyed watching her banter and meddle. The Beauty and the Beast elements are cleverly woven into the story, and even without the murder investigation, there’s enough to make it a unique take on an old tale. A delightful standalone companion to this series.

Frankly in Love by David Yoon: Frank Li has watched his parents react to his older sister’s choices and he knows they will never accept him dating anyone who isn’t Korean. So he and a family friend, Joy Song, pretend to date. Fake-dating is one of my most favourite romance tropes but I’m not a fan when it’s a cover for actually dating someone else -- I don’t like others getting hurt by the deception. Despite that, I found this YA novel engaging and unexpectedly moving. And an absolutely fascinating look at being the child of immigrants.

The Night Country by Melissa Albert: The Hazel Wood was excellent, sharp and compelling, but I didn’t enjoy the sequel much at all. In the first book there’s a much stronger thread of hope running through the darkness.

This Is How You Lose the Time War by Amal El-Mohtar and Max Gladstone: The letters exchanged between Red and Blue, two agents on opposing sides of a time war, are vibrant and memorable, playful and poignant. I particularly enjoyed their different names for each other. (“Dearest Blue-da-ba-dee”, “My Dear Mood Indigo”, “Dearest 0000FF” -- that one made me laugh, “Dear Red Sky at Morning”...) The scenes in between leave many questions unanswered about the war being fought. I couldn’t shake the uncomfortable feeling that if I actually understood what was going on, I wouldn’t like the characters. Nevertheless the letters are brilliant, and I can deal with uncertainty for the space of a novella.

A Dead Djinn in Cairo by P. Djèlí Clark (narrated by Suehyla El-Attar): This novelette is too brief to involve what I enjoy most about murder mysteries, like carefully prying into people’s motives or characters forming supportive relationships in the face of an atmosphere of suspicion and unease. It is possible I’d like this worldbuilding in a different story, and that I would care more about Special Investigator Fatma el-Sha'arawi if I spent more time with her.

The Jane Austen Project by Kathleen A. Flynn: Rachel and Liam, a doctor and an actor-turned-academic, are sent back to 1815 to befriend Jane Austen and uncover an unpublished novel. Time travel allows for portraying Austen’s world with historical accuracy from the perspective of a woman with contemporary attitudes, and creates interesting challenges and anxieties. There’s a high degree of wish fulfilment in meeting Austen, but also realistic complications and consequences. This book impressed me even though -- or perhaps because -- it wasn’t always comfortable or to my taste. I’d have adored it, had things been slightly different, yet it’s nevertheless gripping and thought-provoking storytelling. I respect that.

#Herenya reviews books #W.R. Gingell #Ursula Vernon #Sherwood Smith #Kate Clayborn #Elle Katharine White #Sherry Thomas #Douglas Adams #Jean Ferris #David Yoon #Melissa Albert #Amal El Mohtar #Max Gladstone #P. Djèlí Clark #Kathleen A. Flynn

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just-some-gt-trash · 4 years

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10.-Manners

The prompt list was made by @hiddendreamer67

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AN: I really liked this chapter and had a lot of fun writing it, I hope you enjoy it as much as I do.

”What do you mean he ran away?!” Asked the king to his advisor.

”This letter was found on the prince's room” Dee said, handing him a pink envelope ”It clearly describes he was not ready for a responsibility as important such as being king”

Emile took the letter and read it ”My poor son, I really hope he's okay, Thomas” he said, catching the attention of Roman's teacher, who was also the person in charge of communication with other kingdoms ”I need you to send a letter to king Remy, he needs to know what happened, tell him to keep his eyes opened, Roman might go to his kingdom, and... the wedding is canceled until my son is found”

”Of course sir” Thomas took Roman's letter and walked out of the room to his own, once he was there, he left the card on his desk and picked up his stuff to write, he still didn’t believe Roman could have done something like that, he was excited to see Patton and his relationship with his father was good, it made no sense.

After some time, the smell the letter had filled the room, Roman used his rose fragrance on the letters he wrote, it was his personal touch, but this smell wasn’t the one of roses, it smelled more like lavenders, which was weird, why would Roman change his usual smell for something so important as a ‘I ran away’ letter?

Something was not right about all of this, Dee was planning something, that was for sure, there was one time when he coughed him collecting magical plants, Thomas knew them well because he had studied magic at some point, he even tried to make a growing potion for the borrowers living on his house, Thomas thought as he finished the letters for king Remy and prince Logan.

He went outside and was about to give them to the royal messenger when an idea popped into his head, Patton looked exactly the same as Roman, if he could finish that growing potion, Patton could take the prince’s place until he figured out what really happened.

He hurried back to his room and looked for his magic materials, and started working on the potion, wasting no seconds until it was ready, now all he had to do was convince Patton to do it, but that was something he would do tomorrow.

Patton ran through the walls, he was excited to see Roman again, the borrower never thought he could be friends with a human, much less the prince himself, he was so distracted on his thoughts that he didn’t notice when he crashed with someone, Patton looked up at him “Sorry Virge, are you okay?”

Virgil cleaned his clothes and picked up the stuff he had borrowed “I’m alright” Virgil and Patton borrowed in the same zone of the kingdom, so they knew each other since years, they even managed to get a place to live together, Virgil looked at the other borrower “Where are you going with such a hurry?”

“Oh” however, Patton didn’t mention his encounter with Roman, as he knew Virgil would freak out “I just need to borrow something urgently, I need it for something I’m making”

“What is it? Maybe I have some left” said Virgil.

Patton was starting to panic at this point, he didn’t like to lie and he wasn’t very good at it “I-I checked and you didn’t have any either”

Virgil raised an eyebrow “You checked my stuff? That’s not likely of you”

“I’m sorry, I told you it’s urgent, and now I really have to go get it so bye Virgil” he said running away “I’ll see you at home!”

Virgil shook his head slightly and sighed, but continued his way, Patton would explain if he wanted to.

Patton sighed relieved as he made his way to his meeting spot with Roman, he got out of the walls and saw the human was already here, sitting and waiting for him “Sorry I’m late, I got distracted on the way here”

The borrower looked up as the human turned to see him, but he wasn’t Roman, he was Thomas “Oh hi Thomas, where’s Roman?”

Thomas lowered his hand for Patton to climb on it “I don’t know, one of the people in the castle found a letter in his room saying he ran away”

“Wait what?” he asked as he climbed on the human’s hand “why would he do that? it makes no sense”

“I know, that’s why I don’t believe it” Thomas raised his hand, leaving Patton at eye level “I think something else happened to him, but I need your help to find out what”

The borrower looked confused “how would I be any help?”

“Well…” Thomas sighed trying to find the words for what he was about to say “I need you to replace him until he appears, and listen to me before you say no, or that I’m crazy or something”

Patton nodded “okay, explain”

Thomas smiled when the borrower gave him a chance “Roman has to marry the prince from the neighbor kingdom, Logan, in order to fix the financial problems of the kingdom, they have been friends for a long time and the agreement had already been sealed, but, with Roman’s supposed disappearance, the wedding has to be canceled, and Logan’s father, king Remy, isn’t a very patient person, if the wedding isn’t done by the end of this month, he will break the deal and the kingdom will be bankrupt, I need you to act like Roman until I find him to keep the deal before it’s too late, please”

The borrower tried to proses all the information “B-But what about my size, surely someone will notice”

“I have something to fix that, with you at human size and with a wig to make your hair darker, you will look just like Roman, no one will ever know”

Patton thought for a moment, he wanted to help if the prince was really in danger “I-I’ll do it, if you’re sure something happened to him, I’ll do anything to help Roman”

“Thank you, now if you don’t mind, I need to put you in my pocket to go back to the castle”

The borrower gulped but nodded, it was the easiest way to avoid being seen, Thomas opened the pocket of his cape and left Patton inside, he stood up and started to walk back to the castle.

Thomas had left Patton in the prince’s room while he went for the growing potion, the borrower was amazed with every detail, the room was huge even for a human, and everything was so fancy, Patton used the sheets to climb down from the bed to the floor, he walked around and looked at everything closely, almost regretting Roman’s offer of staying here.

The human went into the room with the potion, surprised and scared when Patton was not on the bed “Pat?”

Patton got closer to the door for Thomas to see him “I’m here, sorry I just wanted to walk around”

“Don’t worry, I just can’t have another prince disappearing” Thomas sat on the floor as the borrower got closer “are you ready?”

“Are you sure it works? And that it’s safe?”

“It is” Thomas used Patton’s small cup, that he asked for before, and poured some of the potion on it “You just have to drink it and you’ll be human sized in no minute” he extended the cup to Patton.

He sighed and took it, looking at the liquid “Here I go then” without thinking it twice, Patton drank the potion, he left the cup on the floor as a warm feeling spread through his body.

He looked up at Thomas just to see he was already as tall as him while he was sitting, he continued to grow as he looked around, amazed at how everything was becoming his size with inch he gained, he stopped growing and looked at Thomas as he stood up “I told you it worked”

“Wow” he was looking at Thomas eye to eye “This is awesome! I never thought I could be human sized one day!” Patton walked around the room, he stopped once he was in front of the desk, one particular object caught his attention, he picked it up “What is this?”

Thomas looked at what Patton had on his hands “Roman made it for you, he wanted you to have a nice suit and he really tried his best to do it”

“Was I really that small?” said the ex-borrower looking down at the piece of clothing, Roman did a very good job with it “Do you think he’ll be alright? Wherever he is…”

“He will” said Thomas, reassuring his friend “He’s a very strong and smart person” he walked to a box on the desk and opened it, getting a wig out of it “And with this, you’re ready”

Patton took the wig and put it on, he looked at himself in a mirror and smiled slightly “We’re still missing a small detail for this plan” he said turning to see Thomas “I don’t know anything about being a prince”

Thomas smiled “Don’t worry about that” he walked to a bookshelf and picked a thick book, opening it and bringing it closer to Patton “It's all here in the Princes Book of Etiquette, let's begin”

He sat on the bed and Patton sat next to him, paying attention to the book the other one had “no nagging, bragging, sweating, fretting, slipping, tripping, slurping, burping, twittering or frittering allowed. Stay present, stay pleasant, stay proud” Read Thomas.

“I- I don’t think I can remember all of this” Said Patton.

“Of course you can, I believe in you” said Thomas “To be a prince is to know which spoon to use” he kept reading, turning the pages and showing the pictures to Patton “to be a prince is a thousand pair of shoes, to maintain a regal gait, leave the parsley on your plate, and be charming, but detached and yet amused” Thomas stood up, leaving the book on the bed and offering his hand to Patton “to be a prince is to never be confused”

Patton took his teacher’s hand and he dragged him around the room “Do a plie and never fall” he kept saying, Patton tried his best to follow his instructions “don’t ever stray from protocol, all through the day there's just one way you must behave. Do keep a grip and never crack, stiff upper lip and arch the back, bend from above, and always wear your gloves, and wave” Thomas handed Patton a pair of gloves and he put them on, imitating Thomas on the way he waved.

Thomas got behind Patton “shoulders back and, tummy in and, pinky out and, lift the chin and, slowly turn the head from side to side” he indicated Patton the way to do it, smiling when he followed.

“I see now” he said, smiling back at Thomas.

“Breathing gently, stepping lightly, smile brightly, nod politely, never show a thing you feel inside” said Thomas as he opened the prince’s wardrobe and got out a couple of outfits “To be a prince is to always look your best” Thomas looked between the clothes and Patton, handing him and outfit and pushing him behind a screen “to be a prince is to never get to rest, sit for a portrait, never squirm, sleep on a mattress extra firm, speak and be clever, never at a loss for words” he said while Patton changed “Curtsy to every count and lord, learn how to play the harpsichord, sing lullabies, and always harmonize in thirds” he said singing the last word.

Patton got out from behind the screen, changed and already looking like a prince “Thirds, thirds” he sang, harmonizing with Thomas.

“Do a plié and don't” continued Thomas.

“Ever, ever, ever fall!” said Patton, finishing Thomas’s sentence and doing the plié perfectly this time.

Thomas smiled and continued “Never show dismay” he extended his hand to Patton.

Patton took it “And be there when people call!” continuing with the rules again.

“Be prepared whatever royal life will bring” he said as he started doing simple ballroom dancing steps “do keep a grip and don't”

“Ever, ever, ever crack!” said Patton, following the steps his teacher did.

Thomas spun Patton “Take a dainty sip”

“Never ever turn your back!”

“There's a time and place and way for everything!” Thomas let go of Patton and walked to Roman’s wardrobe once more “To be a prince is to never make your bed” he said taking out one of the prince’s crowns and walking to Patton “to be a prince is to always use your head” Thomas put the crown on Patton and looked at him, he was sure this was going to work, it had to, and Patton was going to be an awesome temporary prince, he already knew all the manners.

To be continued...

Taglist:

@snekky-boi

@brain-deadx0

@agentblackkat

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