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femme-is-my-gender · 4 years

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I know theres a bunch of posts already about how Femme has been stolen by straight/non wlw women and printed on tshirts and mangled from it's original use. But. Seeing so many butches and fem(me)s on here get constantly asked to tell some confused lesbian if they're femme/butch based on shit like aesthetics is the real issue to me. Which might be a side effect of Femme being coopted by corporations but idk when I see wlw/lesbians on here asking for validation as a butch who likes wearing skirts or asking if they are butch/fem(me) if they do this or wear that and its just exhausting. Bc if I cant be seen by my own community as a femme for what that really means like I just cant handle. I dont just ID as femme bc I like pink and wearing makeup!!!!! I call myself femme to be seen as a gnc women who values and and supports gnc women and butches!! Who also likes pink and getting dolled up for my partner!!! And it's becoming clear to me that calling myself femme just doesnt portray what I want it to most of the time and idk if that's going to change or how else to explain the hopelessness I feel when I see those anon asks saying "can I do, wear, be, X,Y,Z and still be femme?" What does it even mean to anyone anymore other than the ever shrinking butch/fem(me) community.

#if this is difficult to read lmk i can clear up what i mean im havkng a hard time finding words to describe how i feel #just #lesbians who dont understand butch/femme roles and dynamics make me so sad. the community in which i feel seen is already so small #and i can feel it shrinking #i cant be the only femme that feels this way?#butch femme #butch/femme #fem lesbian #femme lesbian #femme #fem #butchxfemme #feel free to rb!

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