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calumhoodgoss · 4 days

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horror story of a teenage 5sos blogger

let me set the scene - its the mid 2010s, I'm 17, in the height of my 5sos fan career, im watching keek compilations all day and scrolling tumblr all night. Life is good.

Fast forward a few months and I start talking to this cute boy at school. we start going on dates, having first kisses - and first everything elses. we're falling madly in love. it's intense (and so cringy to look back at as an adult) but again, life is good! not a worry in the world!!

eventually.. it somehow comes up that my boyfriend and i both have tumblrs (of VERY different nature's mind you). we wanted to show eachother things we'd found online but we were both adamant we didn't want to see eachothers blogs (FOR OBVIOUS REASONS). instead of following each other, we would send each other screenshots of funny textposts, pictures, etc. - blacking out our respective blog names and url's to protect our online anonymity. life is good!

now by day, I'm spending all hours messaging my totally hot boyfriend but by night... by night, I'm reblogging hot gifs of calum hood, smut fanfics, imagines, general gifs of hot couples making out (ifykyk). it's the HEIGHT of tumblr fanfiction and imagine culture and I could not get enough. i was exploring things in real life with my boyfriend while also exploring online through fics. reblogging every single thing along the way. i was having my cake and eating it too and it was a fucking good time to be alive. life is so good!

of course, like any normal person, I was using my tags as a stream of consciousness. a way to get out my feelings about cal, about my boyfriend, about being a teenager, about LITERALLY EVERYTHING. Unfiltered, hormonal, teenage girl writing about the boys she likes. every. damn. night. life! is! good!

until.. all until.. my boyfriend and i were lying together in a park, under a tree, light filtering down on us as we talk and laugh and kiss - a perfect afternoon UNTIL he says there's something he has to tell me. 'what does *name of my blog* mean?'

TURNS OUT, the very first time I sent him a screenshot of something, I didn't black out my url properly and he had been SECRETLY STALKING MY BLOG FOR MONTHHHSSSS.

MONTHS

MONTHS!!!!!!

Literally just months worth of calum hood smut, so.much.smut, smut requests too!!!, soft porn gifs WITH TAGS LITERALLY EXPLICITLY ABOUT MY BOYFRIEND, countless text posts about our dates and whatever the fuck I was thinking or feeling that day, 5sos drama, EVERYTHING. EVERYTHINGGGGG. ABSOLUTELY EV ER Y THIN G

needless to say that blog was immediately scorched from the surface of the earth. and since then, I virtually haven't been on 5sos tumblr - until now. I was so mortified that I wasn't just throwing my thoughts into the void, I was literally scarred.

we're still together though lol I guess he some how liked me enough to look past the 5sos blog HAHA. he's a much stronger person than I because if the roles were reversed and he had some obsessed teenage fan blog, I think i would have gotten the ick straight away. Especially since I literally NEVER talked about 5sos with him because I was soooo embarrassed that I was obsessed with them (this was album one era guys HAHA and my boyfriend was way cooler than me in highschool). now I don't care, I play them in the shower all the time - he can deal with it hahaha

moral of the story is, idk don't tell your teenage boyfriend you have tumblr cause he will find your blog

#he showed me his blog to make me feel better #it wasnt even embarrassing #he would post his film photos on there #and some of them did really well #this was 10 years ago #before film really started having its hay day again in the main streem #he was way cooler than me #i just reblogged stories about calum hoods dick 😭#5sos #5 seconds of summer #calum hood #luke hemmings #michael clifford #ashton irwin #***almost 10 years ago

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sleekervae · 4 months

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Yoü & I [2.6]

Masterlist

A/N: The finals season is wrapping up and I'm almost finished all my projects, but I still got lots of content I'll be banging out over the holiday break. Thanks as always for sticking around!

Warnings: none

Charlotte could draw many parallels between Toronto and New York: tall-ass skyscrapers, streets shrouded with people all with more important places to be, homeless who begged for money on every block and a niche of street food and culture to indulge in.

After the two hour flight into Canada, the bands took the day to decompress before their show the next day. The hotel they were staying at was beautiful, and a perk to staying in a gorgeous hotel in the dead of summer was the rooftop pool -- which Maria practically begged the girls to come with her for a 'pool day'.

A pool day sounded like just the thing Charlotte was due for. Her hands were cramped from clutching pens and her fingers were blistered from working on the guitar so much -- a break was overdo.

She stood in the illustriously well-lit bathroom, admiring her slim physique in the little black bikini she'd slipped on. It was a newer piece that Maria had picked out for her on a recent shopping trip, and while Charlotte wasn't so keen on how little it covered at first, the more she looked at it on her the more she liked it.

Tying her hair into a half-assed bun, Charlotte exited the bathroom to find Chloe still lying on the bed, texting and smiling like a mad man. She didn't pay much attention to her bandmate, but Charlotte didn't mind. She watched the galaxy-haired drummer with a coy smile as she slipped on a yellow sundress.

The last time Chloe looked this giddy was just before the band had taken off -- about three years ago, now. She hadn't had much luck in the way of romance since her career had skyrocketed, much like the other girls, she was always busy traveling, tracking, writing. And when she did meet a potential interest, it didn't forego more than a week when Chloe would either loose interest or she would be ghosted for no apparent reason.

"Who ya' talking to, Smiley?" Charlotte asked.

"Jeff the Killer," Chloe replied.

Charlotte nodded, "Well, maybe you can take two minutes away from Eva and go get your swim suit on? Before we get assaulted with Amber alerts?"

At the mention, Chloe set down her phone and glanced at the singer, "Do you think it's too early to be sending bathing suit pics?" she asked.

Charlotte simpered, "Um -- it's been about a week, so I'd say so. Does she follow your insta?"

"Yeah,"

"Then just post it there,"

Chloe smiled, "Ah ha! The subtle thirst trap! You're a genius!"

I'm not so sure 'subtle' is affiliated with any social media, Charlotte thought to herself.

"Thank you," she replied.

Chloe changed into her own electric red one-piece and shorts, and the girls quickly went to meet their friends at the pool. They caught a glimpse of the elevator just as it was beginning to close, growing cause for the girls to sprint.

"Hold the door!" Chloe called.

A hand extended out of the gap and held the doors open for the girls to rush in. And lo and behold, Luke and Michael were in the elevator as well.

"Hey, fancy meeting you guys here," Luke grinned.

"Funny how we just keep running into each other," Charlotte smirked, "As it by fate,"

Chloe meanwhile glared down at Michael's swim trunks, "Nice shorts, Mikey,"

Michael glanced down at his blue swimmers, printed with little silhouettes of fish and turtles -- sure, at first glance they may have been more suited for a child rather than a twenty-year-old man. But Michael liked them, so what?

He, as well as Luke and Charlotte, waited anxiously for another snarky remark from Chloe, but she just looked straight ahead. She said nothing.

"And?" he asked.

"And what?" Chloe turned to him.

"No follow up?"

Chloe smiled, "Oh, I have a follow up. I'm just in a good mood right now,"

"Oh,"

"... If I wasn't in a good mood, I'd ask why you were skimming through the children's section at Walmart for swim trunks," Chloe went on.

Luke snapped his fingers, "There it is,"

The pool wasn't the only highlight of the hotel's rooftop. Aside from umbrella seats, a canopy bar and a hot tub, the kids had a stunning view of downtown Toronto. Not as infinite as Tokyo and not as imperialistic as Vienna, the skyline of glass buildings reflected off of one another, creating a beautiful ripple of blues and teals that crashed against the cloudless sky above.

Maria and Kimberly were already laid out on deck chairs, soaked in sunscreen, rays and bikini clad. Across from them were Ashton and Calum, partaking in a game of ping pong. There were no other guests on the deck, meaning they had the pool to themselves for a while.

Kimberly pried her eyes open when she felt a shadow fall over her, scrunching her eyes and blocking the sun with her hand to find Charlotte and Chloe standing over her. The material of her own navy blue two-piece glinted in the rays.

"Yes?" she raised an eyebrow at them, prompting Maria to look over.

"You guys are no fun," Chloe chided.

"No fun? We were waiting for you," Maria said, her voice a little gravelly.

"Our bad, but somebody just couldn't stop texting another particular somebody," Charlotte winked at the girls. Kimberly awed up at Chloe.

"Aw, how's Eva?" she asked.

"Wishing she was here instead of Syracuse, I imagine," Chloe replied, taking the deck chair next to her. Charlotte took the one on the other side of Maria, both of them stripping back down to their bikinis.

"You guys have been talking for how long, now?" Maria asked.

"Just under a week," Chloe replied.

"And it's constant," Charlotte remarked, "I think we have reasons to be optimistic,"

"We can start getting optimistic after the three week mark. If you don't scare her away, I'll be so proud of you," Kimberly told her.

Chloe simpered back, "Your confidence in me is astounding,"

At the other end of the pool, Luke was just pulling off his t-shirt and unpacking his backpack. He had his iPhone with an audiobook he thought he would try out. He could hear his mom's voice in his head, reminding him to be sure he put on lots of sunscreen. It was ironic how he came from one of the hottest continents in the world, and yet he was as pasty as a soy bean.

When he turned back around, reaching as best he could to slather sunscreen on his back, his line of sight fell on Charlotte. Her yellow sundress had disappeared and she was clad in a black triangle bikini, contrasting against her natural olive skin that seemed to glow under the sun. Her shapely legs crossed one in front of the other as she hunched over to shake out her hair. He had to swallow the lump in his throat when she suddenly swung around in his direction, not realizing that he'd been caught staring when his eyes locked with hers. If he had a clear view of Charlotte than she had a clear view of him.

He smiled sheepishly and waved, a tint of blush covering his face. Charlotte shook her head at him with a little smirk and put up her middle finger. Though she wasn't exactly innocent in the staring department either, and how could she not be?

"Eyes to yourself!" Chloe suddenly shouted, having caught Luke staring, too. Her outburst drew the attention of everyone else.

Ashton giggled to himself, therefore missing Calum's backhand. The ping pong ball whizzed right by his face.

"I win!" Calum declared.

"You do not!" Ashton countered, "That went out of bounds,"

"We didn't set an out of bounds!" Calum argued.

Ashton pointed to one of the potted plants behind him, "Yes we did. We agreed if it landed after the tree on my side, or the towel rack on your side, then it's out. Besides, Chloe distracted me,"

"Oh, boo hoo," Calum chided back, "Sore loser,"

With the others distracted, Michael took the opportunity to take a running start and do a cannon ball into the pool -- effectively splashing everybody within a metre of him. Maria and Kimberly were violently ripped from their sun bath with icy cold water droplets, while Chloe hid behind her deck chair and Charlotte covered her head.

"Michael!" Kimberly scolded, sitting up in a huff. The guitarist remerged from the water, rubbing chlorine from his eyes and shaking out his drenched hair.

"The water's fine, guys! Come on in!" he replied.

Luke shook his head at his hyperactive friend, mouthing a 'sorry' at Charlotte before jumping in himself. Charlotte made good to stand back this time -- the other girls weren't so lucky.

"Oh, come on guys!" Maria whined, wiping cold water off her legs, "A little warning would suffice!"

Charlotte couldn't help but laugh at her friends. Sure, they were trying to have a relaxing afternoon in the sun, but hey, a pool was a pool. And since no one else was around...

Kimberly saw it coming this time, and she moved off the deck chair just in time as Charlotte jumped in after the boys. Maria grimaced when more water splattered across her face.

"Where's my --" Chloe then cannon-balled in, sending water everywhere once again, "... towel?"

There was an assortment of balls and blow up floats for the bands to fool around with -- though given the colours of the toys they were very well meant for little kids. Never the less, a game of volleyball ensued in the pool, with Charlotte and Chloe on one team and Luke and Michael on the other. Calum and Ashton's ping pong game was still in full swing, considering that Ashton demanded a rematch. Kimberly kept the score this time around and they set the boundary lines.

Luke pitched the rubber ball to Chloe, who bunted it over to Charlotte, who spiked it back at Michael. However, Michael miscalculated where the ball would land and ended up getting knocked in the face. He fell back into the water.

"Oh, shit!" but he emerged quickly, rubbing at his nose and eyes. All attention around the pool was directed at the sudden injury.

"You okay, mate?" Luke swam over to him.

"Mike, I'm so sorry!" Charlotte exclaimed, thinking the worst she'd done was bruise his eye or cheek. And God knows they'd have fun explaining a heinous mark to their managers.

Michael pushed the water off his face with his hands and pushed back his sopping hair, looking dazed as he glanced around the pool, "Where am I?" he then glanced at Luke, "My God, are you gorgeous," he then broke out into a smile. Luke rolled his eyes.

"He's fine," he assured the girls, grabbing the ball and handing it to him, "Your serve,"

Meanwhile, the ping pong game was getting heated. Kimberly's head was practically moving in sync with the little white ball as it bounced between Ashton and Calum. Ashton was determined to knocked the ball past Calum but he was a swift opponent. At the next pass, Calum batted the ball just a little too hard however.

The little white ball whizzed past Ashton's head this time, only instead of hitting the ground it flew over the deck and over the railing... over downtown. The boys were stunned, Kimberly was at a loss for how to call the game.

"So... who wins?"

They both stared down a stunned Kimberly, who only shrugged as she racked her logic, "Okay... the ball is technically... definitely out. Ashton wins by default," she decided.

"Yes!" Ashton rejoiced, throwing his hands up.

Calum just shook his head and threw his paddle down, going instead for the neon green floatie, "It's too hot for ping pong anyway," he slipped the floatie around his waist and took off in a little run.

"Go Calum!" Michael chanted. Calum reached the edge of the pool, but instead of a grandiose jump he simply chose to hop in. He didn't even get his head past the water thanks to the floatie. The boys broke into fits of giggles.

Maria just shook her head, "What? You afraid to get your hair wet?" she called.

Calum smirked at her, "Are you, Little Miss Sunshine?"

Maria rolled her eyes, opting to stand up and proudly show off her purple bikini set. Calum subconsciously licked his lips, which didn't go unnoticed by Luke. Maria stood at the deep end of the pool, did a little bow, and dived in gracefully. She emerged a few seconds later, shaking out her raven black hair.

"Beat that, Marty Mc-Floatie!" she smirked at Calum.

Ashton did some flexes and bending before he took his running start, ready to make another big splash. However, he didn't count on Michael. hucking the rubber ball at him as he jumped in. The ball nailed him square in the chest and instead of a pencil dive he just flailed in.

"Michael!" the girls scolded. Ashton made a quick recovery, glaring over at his bandmate.

"Fuck you!" he pretended to cry, clinging to Luke in pity. Luke held him tightly.

"It's okay, honey, he didn't mean it,"

Kimberly pushed some of her dreadlocks over her shoulder, nervous to get them wet. It wasn't so much getting them wet that was the problem, but the drying process could be pretty tedious depending on the day.

"Come on, Kim!" Chloe urged.

"Do you know how much of a bitch it is to do my hair when it gets wet?" she replied.

In his peripherals Luke spotted another large floatie: a raft, to be specific. He had a brilliant idea, then. He swam to the other edge of the pool and retrieved it, pushing it towards Kimberly.

"Here!" he called, "Use this!"

Kimberly smiled at him, "Thanks Luke," she quickly tied back her dreads and sat on the edge. Luke and Calum held the inflatable raft steady so she could wiggle on top, laying on her stomach and paddling over to meet her friends. Her hair was safe.

Much of the afternoon was spent splashing about. They played a couple round of volleyball and then tried to play a game of Marco Polo. Emphasis on tried to. Poor Calum was picked to 'Marco', but the others devised to slip out of the water quietly all while shouting 'Polo'.

"Marco!" he called tirelessly, his eyes squeezed shut as he hopped from spot to spot.

"Polo!" Chloe called back, helping Kimberly off of the raft.

"Marco!" Calum called again.

"Polo!" Ashton quietly sat back on a deck chair and threw his hands behind his head. Calum's patience was wearing thin. He should've at least tapped someone out by now. Calum waded through the pool for a good five minutes before he realized everyone was cheating.

"You wankers," he muttered, understandably miffed when his friends started laughing.

At some point, Charlotte took to clambering back to the edge of the deck for a dry spell. She sat on the ledge and let her feet dangle in the water. Just as soon as she slathered on some more sunscreen, Luke had come to sit beside her. He had with him a cold bottle of water that he offered to her.

"Thanks," she smiled at him, "You want some SPF 50?"

"I'll pass," he shook his head politely. Charlotte raised an eyebrow at him, having heard those words many a times before Luke would be complaining of sunburn hours later.

"Famous last words," she teased. Luke stuck out his tongue.

Chloe and Ashton were still in the pool, facing off against Maria and Calum in a fierce game of chicken. Kimberly just watched from her raft, sipping a bottle of orange juice while Michael played referee.

Luke kept his glance on Charlotte, she couldn't help but shiver as water droplets slid down her spine. She was a sight to behold under the sun, her golden skin ablaze against the sharp black fabric of her bikini, and she had some makeup that stained beneath her eyes but Luke didn't point it out. She looked really cool, actually.

"How're you doing?" he asked, not having much of a chance to talk to since they took off again. Really talk, the way they used to.

"I'm wet," Charlotte replied, unable to keep the smug smile off her face. Luke rolled his eyes.

"No shit," he grinned, "I mean really, though. What's going on with you?"

Charlotte shrugged, "Nothing. I'm stuck on the road with a bunch of crackheads for three whole months. Other than that... I guess I'm just -- existing,"

"Existing?"

"Yeah. I'm here, but lately I feel that I haven't been here," she pointed to her head.

Luke's smile fell a little, "Has Ben been bothering you again?"

"No," she shook her head, "No, I think he finally got the hint,"

Luke sighed and looked down at his hands, his face tinting red but not from the sun, "You know..." he spoke after a small moment of silence. Charlotte glanced at him and sipped from her water. He laughed nervously, "You're gonna think I'm a cheese puff or something but -- I'm really fucking grateful for you, Char,"

Charlotte broke into a flattered smile, "I'm really grateful for you, too,"

"But seriously," Luke said, "I feel like I don't thank you enough for everything you do for me. No one else would do the things you do for me, no one else tries me happy like you do and you have no idea how much you mean to me. And I know I dicked around on ya a couple weeks ago --"

"-- Water under the bridge," Charlotte said, her heart burning in her chest. She had no idea where this was coming from.

"But the fact is I don't know what I did to deserve you and I need you to know how fucking grateful I am for you... even when I don't deserve to have you in my life. And if you feel like you can't talk to me about shit 'cause I'll judge you, I won't. I'll always take care of you. You're my best friend and I don't know what I'd do without you,"

Charlotte bit the inside of her lip, willing away the stinging sensation in the back of her eyes, "Jesus Christ," she wrapped her arms around him. She never expected him to say anything like that to her, especially because it was the exact way she felt about him.

"Am I corny?" he chuckled, hugging her tightly. None of them cared that they were just skin-to-skin in midday. She smelled so sweetly of grapefruit intermingled with bitter chlorine.

"No, you're perfect," Charlotte laughed, "If anything, I'm the one that's grateful for you. No one puts up with my stupidity and shit like you do. I don't know how you do it, honestly,"

Luke snickered and shook his head, pushing some of her wet hair behind her ear, "You're not stupid. You're far from it, Shorty,"

Charlotte smiled and punched his arm, "If the others heard us they'd take the piss out of us so hard right now,"

Luke rolled his eyes, "Like I told you before, they're just jealous of us, "

"Always gotta' be a fucking optimist, don't ya?" Charlotte huffed.

"Always gotta throw in a fucking curse, don't ya?" Luke shrugged.

Charlotte glared back, and before Luke knew it he had been shoved into the pool. When he resurfaced Charlotte was in a fit of giggles while he sputtered and coughed up chlorine.

"And here we were having a moment!"

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