#can lin manuel miranda please write this because I need it in my life

[i23kazu]

say no to this

warnings – mentions of abuse in passing, it's not descriptive. also diluc cheats on you. honestly i'd tag this as suggestive because there's a bit of IMPLIED sexy times in this one but i didn't write it in!

characters – diluc x fem!reader [can be read as gn!reader if you'd like, but feminine terminology (wife, mother, etc) is still there]

a/n – the second part of my hamilton au! all lyrics go to lin manuel miranda, i don't take credit for any of it. i had to rewrite some parts of the song to fit the au! please reblog if you enjoyed this! the song is "say no to this" from hamilton :3 link to series post.

There's nothing like summer in the city, Ying thought. Someone under stress meets someone looking pretty – there's trouble in the air, even you can smell it. Our dear Ragnvindr's by himself: I think I'll let him tell it.

( diluc's pov )

I hadn't slept in a week – I was weak, I was awake. You've never seen a bastard orphan more in need of a break. Between longing for Jean and I was missing my wife – that's when Miss Donna Reynolds walked into my life.

The girl said, " Mr Ragnvindr, I know you are a man of honor. I'm so sorry to bother you at home, but I don't know where to go, and I came here all alone."

Reynolds added, "My husband's doin' me wrong. He's been beatin' me, cheatin' on me, and mistreatin' me. But suddenly he's up and gone, and I don't have the means to go on."

I sighed. The Reynolds family was a notoriously broken one – James Reynolds was a gambler and a drunkard, a wife beater, even. Donna Reynolds took the brunt of it all.

Therefore, I offered her a loan and offered to walk her home – I was luckily she lived close by, otherwise I wouldn't have offered in lieu of the mountains of paperwork that welcomed me in my abode. Once we were out on the streets, Donna tapped my shoulder.

"Yes?"

"Oh, nothing – you're too kind, sir."

I felt a deep pity for her life, and gave her thirty bucks that I had kept away.

"I live a block away," she said. "This one's mine, sir."

Donna walked up the steps to her home, breath trembling. She placed her hand on

Then I said, "Well, I should head back home. Goodni-"

What I wasn't expecting was the matriarch of the Reynolds family to grab my wrist tightly, and pull me into her house.

"Mrs Reynolds, I really should be going-"

"Just follow me, Diluc." Donna turned red, and led me to her bed.

(WAHOO SEXY TIMES WAAAOW i'm not writing this shit.)

That was when I began to pray. Archons, show me how to say no to this. How do I not know how to say no to this? Barbatos, she looks so helpless. (And her body's saying, "Hell, yes.)

No, show me how to say no to this.

I don't know how to say no to this!

In my mind, I promise you, (Y/N) – I'm trying to go, but all of a sudden her mouth was on mine, and I don't say no.

I couldn't say no.

On my account, I wish I could say that was the last time – I know, I said that last time, but it became a pastime. A month into this endeavor with Donna, I received a letter from a Mr. James Reynolds, even better. It said:

"Dear Sir, I hope this letter finds you in good health And in a prosperous enough position to put wealth In the pockets of people like me down on their luck You see, that was my wife who you decided to-"

Fuuuuuuuu-.

"Uh oh, you made the wrong sucker a cuckold So time to pay the piper for the pants you unbuckled And hey, you can keep seein' my whore wife If the price is right, if not I'm telling your wife."

I hid the letter and I raced to her place. I screamed, "How could you?" in her face, but she said;

"No, sir!"

Donna was half dressed and apologetic: a mess, she looked pathetic, she was crying.

"Please, don't go, Diluc!"

"So was your whole story a setup?" I asked angrily, throwing the letter into her face.

"I don't know about any letter!"

"Stop crying, archons, dammit, get up!"

"I didn't know any better!"

"I am ruined! My career is ruined." I wanted to tear my hair out in that moment.

"Please, don't leave me with him helpless!" Donna was sobbing into my lap.

"I am helpless, how could I do this?"

"Diluc, please – just give him what he wants and you can have me!" I don't want you.

"Whatever you want, if you pay, you can stay! Please!"

Barbatos, show me how to say no to this. I don't know how to say no to this.

But this situation's helpless, right? Who am I to deny a person in need?

"There is nowhere I can go!" Donna cried. I couldn't think straight anymore, and I kissed the girl on my lap.

To tell you the truth, when her body's on mine, I don't say no. I can't say no.

Say no to this, Diluc.

Yes.

"So?" James Reynolds smirked, in my mind. I could picture that gleeful grin of that man when I give him the money.

Nobody needs to know. I'm sorry, (Y/N).

wahoo sorry i put this story on hold for so long!! hope yall enjoyed and dont worry the next part will definitely be better <3 please reblog with tags and comments :") i wont tag this with the astronetwrk tag because this is suggestive ueueue

#diluc x reader #diluc x fem reader #genshin x reader #genshin impact x reader #mildly suggestive – this part is about cheating tbh. #also emotional and physical abuse is mentioned #so i'd be warned if i were yall :") #you can search up the lyrics to Say No To This (Hamilton) if you want to see the premise of this story #[📝 stewardess' notepad!] #hamilton #hamilton au

[aye-of-newt]

For the music emoji ask game: 🎥📚🥲💖 please!

🎥song that paints a picture in my mind: I had such a hard time with this question because I felt like a story song or a musical theater song would be “cheating”. 

I am just going to go with “Palmcorder Yajna” by the Mountain Goats because it’s both very explicit and very... not at the same time. Like it’s very easy to understand once you know what all the references are referencing.

Either way, it’s evocative for sure. 

😢song that makes you cry: “Unlikely Lovers” from Falsettos. At this point in the musical, the character Whizzer is dying of AIDS and his partner and their friends visit him in the hospital. The line “and we vow that we will buy the farm arm in arm” tends to be where I lose it. Even if the context wasn’t so crushing the harmony at the point alone would bring me to tears.

💖 guilty pleasure song: Now I like to say that I don’t believe in guilty pleasures because you shouldn’t feel guilty for enjoying things regardless of what others think…. but if I had to pick I would say Not the Boy Next Door— the glee cast recording by Chris Colfer. I know glee is categorically Not Good and people mock it relentlessly. And a lot of it is deserved because... woof.

And yet, it was very important to me as a child in the conservative rural midwest. Honestly glee was actually they first ever representation I can remember seeing at like 9 (I think?) years old. Of course my parents made me turn it off because a gay people were “disgusting” …but I still remembered how when Kurt came out, his dad told him he loved him and that it was okay. And that planted in me a seed of an idea of a belief that maybe my parents weren’t right about everything. And, you know what? By the time I realized that I am gay the idea didn’t automatically make me hate myself. Because I had been told just once in an incredibly crucial moment that it is okay. So yeah. Glee is important actually.

And Chris Colfer is just simply an incredible performer. I love his voice. He kills this song.

📚 song/album you could write a term paper on: Sunday from tick tick boom (specifically the 2021 movie adaptation directed by Lin Manuel Miranda)

Abridged term paper as follows:

To understand the brilliance of this song and the emotional sucker punch it carries you need to know a bit of musical theater history. So let’s start with the place that makes the most sense, with “god” himself-- Stephen Sondheim.

Sondheim was one of the most (if not THE most) respected composers and lyricists in musical theater history. I cannot think of any singular person who has impacted their chosen art form to the same massive extent as Steve impacted musical theater. To compare him to Shakespeare is not an exaggeration. He was revered and beloved almost universally within the theater community, not only for his genius but for who he was as a person. He was known as an excellent teacher and mentor (just watch him instruct a college student attempting to sing one of the most difficult songs he ever wrote/one of the most difficult songs in musical theater here) and for answering quite literally every single one of the thousands upon thousands of pieces of fan-mail he received.

One of his beloved musicals and the show he described as being his “most autobiographical”/the one that he put the most of himself into, was Sunday in the Park with George. It was inspired by the painting A Sunday Afternoon on the Island of La Grande Jatte by Georges Seurat, though the story is largely fictionalized. 

(you know, this painting)

The themes of Sunday in the Park with George center around what it means to be an artist, the desire to leave a legacy, and making choices between one’s creative work vs one’s relationships. Act one closes with the song “Sunday” in which George makes order out of the chaos of life and places the final touches to his masterpiece, capturing a perfect moment, and cementing his legacy, forever.

With the background laid, let us move on to talking about Jonathan Larson, one of the young writers Sondheim mentored who went on to do great work.

Jonathan is best known for writing the book, music, and lyrics for Rent-- a musical which won several Tony Awards, including Best Musical; the Pulitzer Prize for Drama; ran for twelve years on Broadway; influenced the creation of a new sub-genre of musical; and became massively popular and iconic, not only in the theater world but in popular culture as well. However, Jonathan was never able to see his work become a success as he tragically died of an aortic dissection on the morning that Rent was to perform its first preview performance. He was only thirty-five years old.

Jonathan struggled his entire professional career to achieve recognition from the world at large, something that he expressed in his own semi-autobiographical piece Tick, Tick... Boom! The musical was originally formatted as a “rock monologue” that Jon performed himself, though it has seen many revisions since his death, eventually turning it into the fully-formed musical it is today. 

The show begins with Jonathan discussing his fear of turning thirty. The theme of "running out of time” was first introduced to the piece by Jonathan himself to illustrate his fear of getting older, but it was hugely emphasized in later productions by writers and directors who knew that he never would. Today, the looming sense of some inescapable fate pervades throughout the show as viewers know what is coming and are helpless to stop it. Jonathan will become famous and respected and beloved, but he will never see it. While everyone in the show assures him that he is still young and has a bright future ahead of him, we know differently. He is running out of time. He only has five years left.

In this sad way, the show that originally began as a piece by a young man fighting for his future has become a bittersweet legacy we look back on, making meaning out of Jonathan’s work that he would never realize was there. This is exemplified nowhere better than in the song “Sunday”.

“Sunday” began as a simple parody of Sondheim’s “Sunday”, recognizable for what it is from the first few notes and becoming clearer and clearer as the song progresses. The original joke of the piece was that Jonathan was arranging the patrons and crappy interior of the diner where he worked in the same way that George was constructing his masterpiece, drawing a comparison between the mundane (or even ugly) and something beautiful.

To make it meta: in Jonathan’s semi-autobiographical musical about his struggles as an artist, he referenced his mentor’s semi-autobiographical musical about the struggles of being an artist. Of course, in the parody, Jon cast himself as the pale imitation of great art, suggesting he was nothing in comparison. It was light-hearted, fun, and, at the time, a pretty recent/topical reference to make. It was never meant to be anything more than a joke.

But then Jonathan left a legacy.

In the 2021 film, Lin Manuel Miranda made phenomenal directorial decisions in a dozen different places but “Sunday” was his home run. He transformed the song from a joke to the pinnacle of what Tick, Tick...Boom! has become, a tribute to the memory of Jonathan Larson.

Throughout the movie, there are cameos of countless famous Broadway figures, but those that appear in the diner scene and utilized perfectly. From true veteran legends, to modern celebrities, to original cast members of Rent, the diner is packed with heroes of the stage. As the song progresses they join in behind Jon to form an inter-generational choir, representing the past, present, and future of musical theater. You can see the arch of the line passing down, the years of history represented and the lives changed. And the hope that radiates toward the future.

A passion and joy for musical theater was passed from Sondheim onto Jonathan, and he went forward to inspire a new generation of theater kids-- including Lin Manuel Miranda. Who, regardless of your personal feelings about him, has already made enormous impact on the world of musical theater and lit the flame for another generation of kids.

That’s what this moment means.

It’s a celebration and a thank you and an honoring of our history, of those that came before us and inspired us, of those who are our future.

There is a moment that is always guaranteed to bring me to tears. As the song nears its peak, “Jon” (played by Andrew Garfield, who should have won an Oscar damn it) takes the hand of legend Bernadette Peters, who originated the role of Dot in Sunday in the Park with George (the main female character, the woman in purple in the painting). She is dressed similarly to her character, including her hat (trust me, the hat is important) and he ushers her into her place in the light. He places his hands over his heart, complete adoration in his eyes, and he bows to her. It’s a sign of utmost respect, of both Jon (the real Jon) acknowledging the legend of Sondheim that came before him, and Lin nodding to both Jon and Steve. It’s all of us watching and wishing we got the chance to say thank you to Steve and Jon and all the others who we look up to and adore.

It’s saying, Jonathan, you didn’t get to see it, but you are remembered. You are loved. You are honored.

You are forever.

#I could talk about tick tick boom for hours #if you want to hear more about it come to my inbox #sorry this is very rambling and not well organized #thanks for the ask! #sorry it took so long to answer! #I was really thinking about the answers #ask game #about me

[iwanttogoeverywhereplease]

Okay, hear me out: Spiderverse Broadway musical.

JUST THINK ABOUT THE POSSIBILITIES. WE GET A SUPER UPBEAT INTRO TO ALL THE CHARACTERS IN ALL THEIR DIFFERENT UNIVERSES AND IT’S SO HAPPY AND BRIGHT AND ENSEMBLE-Y AND GOOD. MJ WHOSE PETER JUST DIED GETS A HEART-WRENCHING SOLO SONG ABOUT HER PAIN THAT MAKES LITERALLY EVERYBODY CRY AND TRANSITIONS INTO PETER B.’S SONG ABOUT LOSING HIS MJ. THERE’S A SONG THAT EVERY SPIDEY SINGS ABOUT BEING AN ORPHAN AND LOSING THEIR UNCLE BENS. MILES AND GWEN GET AN AWKWARD SONG ABOUT BEING YOUNG AND HAVING CRUSHES AND BEING FRIENDS AND NOT KNOWING WHAT YOU’RE FEELING. NOIR GETS A 40s INSPIRED NUMBER TO TELL HIS BACKSTORY. THE POWER BALLAD THAT DOC OC COULD GET.

JUST. A SPIDERVERSE MUSICAL. PLEASE.

#spiderman into the spiderverse #miles morales #gwen stacy #spider ham #peni parker #spiderman noir #peter b parker #peter parker #musicals #broadway #mj watson #love #music #songs #lin manuel miranda #can lin manuel miranda please write this because I need it in my life #I just really wanna see a spiderverse musical okay #spiderverse musical #please #can post malone make an appearance #just for fun #let's go let's go

[amazingphilza]

study buddies :: cc!multiple x reader

fluff , platonic , gender neutral ! some headcanons if the mcyts were trying to help you do hw :D

cc’s included in order: tommyinnit , tubbo , ranboo , wilbur soot , philza , technoblade

tommyinnit

i feel like he’s the type to be in a long discord call with you whilst you both try to finish your work

mans uses the screensharing feature like there’s no tomorrow

“y/n watch my stream on discord and help me guess the answers”

“tommy no! i haven’t even taken a film class before”

“your guess is good as mine”

“just cheat and google the answers!!!”

“fuck you”

he actually just wants your attention because he’s bored out of his mind doing homework

five minutes later of asking you to help him guess questions he’s like

“hey y/n”

“what now?”

“let’s play bedwars”

“oh my god shut up!!!”

if tommy has to speedrun something before a deadline, it is a whole different story tho; he will be so focused on completing that he won’t hear what you’re saying

if you’re struggling in math, you’re on your own

“math is shit, only numbers i need is my primes and youtube analytics” says tommy any time you complain about math

besides the fact he isn’t good at solving math problems, you can’t even read his handwriting if he did try showing you how to do a problem

“okay, y/n, it’s simple, just look” he says in his kareninnit voice and everything

you’d be like “is the variable a G or a 9??”

“fuck you that’s a 4!!!”

tubbo

i don’t know if tubbo ever talked about school before but something about him makes me think he’s actually pretty good at math

like he can explain a few things when it comes to math / algebra

CODING GO BRRRR

no geometry or calculus though, anything past algebra will go bad

if tubbo is doing homework with you, he will definitely tune you out

“hey tubbo can you help me on this question?”

you don’t get a response until like 20 minutes later

“oh yeah, what was it y/n?”

like now you answer? i just got the answer myself after so long, forget you smh

“oh nothing tubbo, nevermind!”

but you’re still grumbling in your head because if he answered just a bit earlier you wouldn’t have gone through the work of finding the answer online

i can also imagine if you’re taking chemistry tubbo is like ;

“oh you’re taking chemistry? let’s make some bombs!” /lh

tubbo would definitely pull an all-nighter with you to finish your projects together

if you had a group project, he would make you do the writing part while he does the drawing part

“we definitely aced this project”

“of course we did, if i made you draw we would’ve ended up with stick figure diagrams”

“TUBBO. THE FUCK?”

ranboo

okay i know ranboo said he isn’t a theatre or band kid (unless im wrong and forgetful) but i feel like he’d be somewhat educated in the topics nonetheless

half the time he’s great moral support, helping you stay motivated !

the other half is him making fun of you

“i cant believe you’re failing, that is so sad, can’t be me”

“it’s literally an honors class, ranboo! it’s supposed to be hard!!”

“taking an honors class willingly? also cant be me AHAHA”

i honestly can’t see ranboo going to school like i know he’s a minor and said he had zoom calls before and plays volleyball but like did i miss something? has he dropped out yet? like something about ranboo does not scream “student” /lh

besides that, i’m not sure what subject he would actually be good in,,, but something about nutrition/health sciences,, he knows a few things

don’t get me wrong, i don’t think he actually likes the subject but somehow remembers what he learned from the class

also gives me the type of energy of the type of person to take a first aid class to be a certified person to do cpr on someone just to kill time during his lunch breaks for a while or something

“i am a certified cpr person”

“my life in ranboo’s hands? oh god please no”

you two would probably joke about the ‘bad’ people in your classes or talk shit about your schools than actually doing anything homework related ngl AHAHAH

“you think your school is down bad? mine went back to campus full time after like 6 months into quarantine because they were running out of money”

“what the hell y/n? your school is a scam, drop out”

“arghhhh i knowww”

“i bet i make more money than your teachers combined AHAHAH”

wilbur soot

he doesn’t seem like the best person to ask for help for homework but can info dump you on very specific historical events + a bit of geography

i kinda see him as the person you can ask to proof read an essay for you and would help it improve immensely

who needs a thesaurus when you have vocabulary boy wilbur?

i dunno if it’s an american thing only or at all, but if/when you get to studying hamilton in your english class, he will get so fucking excited

“no wilbur it isn’t fun! imagine listening to lin-manuel miranda rap ‘alexander hamilton’ at the white house from like 2009 on repeat for over an hour whilst trying to write an analysis about it!! it was so distracting”

“well clearly someone has a personal problem with mr lin-manuel. if i were you, i’d be singing the whole thing”

is this last bit personal and complete spite from my freshman year english class? yes. i do not care? no. /hj

unrelated but i actually scribbled nice guy ballad lyrics and other songs on my english scratch papers in freshman year but anyway

probably isn’t the best person to be in a call to do homework with but wilbur doesn’t mind you ringing him occasionally sometimes

i dunno i can just see him easily get bored of the silence or something but also doesn’t want to bother you too much

but he is genuinely proud of you whenever you tell him you aced a big test you were studying for :D

philza

this man’s bad advice is as bad as him trying to help you on any subject

he’s an old man so /hj

but like honestly, he hasn’t been at school for so long, phil can probably only help with the most basic things when it comes to school

if you have a wack teacher that makes you collect data through surveying people, phil would be one of the best people to ask! straightforward and won’t take too much of your time compared to other people ahem,,

statistics things ! sobs

if you ever complain a lot about your classes and contemplating dropping out and stuff, he will def scold you hard

“ugh phillllllllll can i just like,, never go to school again?”

“do not drop out”

“argh fine, i won’t just ‘cause philza minecraft said so”

honestly if you get a high score in a big test like your sats/gcse’s (whatever you’re taking from wherever you are) he’d probably order you a small meal or something to celebrate :D

like how phil bought ranboo bought him food to his house, it would start as a joke but when you get your test scores back he’s like “YOOO GOOD JOB Y/N”

expect a left meat pizza coming to your house .

technoblade

like wilbur, techno is also helpful when it comes to history!

def knows a decent bit of literature too

besides that i don’t really see him being that helpful

even if he was supposed to be an english major

he will just get mad at the school system for teaching you useless things

“being in school is good but why do you need to know how to know if something is a triangle or not? i can obviously see with my eyes that it’s a triangle”

“i dunno! ask the person that made up geometry”

“just look at a kaleidoscope and be over with it, it isn’t that hard”

“that isn’t how it works—”

“bruhhh”

if you’re looking for the person to call while doing homework, he is not the person /lh

it’s either like 0 or 100 with techno

he can just completely not say anything and ignore you or go on a full rant about whatever class or homework you have

if you have an essay you need written, it will take a lot of bribing but he might take the opportunity if you are rich

“techno i’ll paypal you $10 please help me”

“no. i can make 10 times that amount in 5 minutes if i just started streaming right now”

“techno i don’t have that kind of money! pleaseee”

“no. instead of complaining, you can use that time to actually start you work”

“you’re the worst”

then you speedrun the essay and get an A just to spite him

#dream smp imagines #dream smp x reader #dream smp x y/n #dream smp headcanons #sbi imagine #sbi x reader #sbi headcanons #mcyt imagine #mcyt x reader #mcyt x y/n #mcyt x you #mcyt headcanons

[beautifulsnake2162020]

Ikevamp headcanons after watching Hamilton

Quick disclaimer: Yes I know this is a show about people who had owned slaves and slavery is bad. Having said that there's a reason why we suspend disbelief for a couple of hours and just allow ourselves to be swept into the story. I also love Phantom of the Opera but I also am aware that this is a story that involves an abusive and toxic relationship. The point is that I am aware that there are problems that needs to be discussed, but I still love the music, the story and the shows okay. This is just fan content not meant to be taken seriously and is just for fun. Okay? Now let's proceed.

I'll be doing Will and Arthur first since I'm currently doing Shakespeare's route and was inspired to do this after MC watches Romeo and Juliet with Vincent and I was wondering how Will would react to watching Hamilton. And Arthur is here because he is my husband/main lover. I might do Mozart and Napoleon next.

SPOILER ALERT: For anyone who hasn't seen the Disney Plus version of Hamilton, there might be some spoilers here (unless you already saw the show or know the story that is).

General Scenario:

You don't know how but Le Comte was able to get the filmed version of Hamilton, a musical which you've told Sebastian that you've been dying to see but was never able to because tickets were always sold out and entering the lottery was going to be a little too expensive for someone who lives in Japan and who doesn't exactly have the money or the time to simply fly to New York if in case she won. You were also excited because apparently Le Comte was able to modify the 21st century tech room that you use for your online classes and was able to get a wide screen and high quality surround sound which made you appreciate his efforts. A part of you was also curious as to how the other residents would react. You were scared that some of them might take offense, especially Napoleon who knew one of the characters in the show in real life. Would they react weirdly for seeing people different from them portray people that they knew? You were also wondering if they might even appreciate some of the 21st century slang that you and Sebastian would sometimes slip back into whenever it was just the two of you alone. After talking it out with everyone and explaining a few more things (like how its probably going to be different since it is a series of captured pictures-or at least that's your closest analogy- being played super fast with the synchronized sound of the actors- or what you were almost tempted to call "Techno Magic") during a dinner in which Shakespeare had decided to be present in, they were actually interested in what this show is about. Napoleon convinced you that he's fine and actually someone else playing Lafayette might even help with the suspension of disbelief since its been awhile since he has last met him anyway. Will even mentioned that while he has read and heard about stories from America, this is probably going to be the first story or production he's going to see from it. The only one who showed any hesitation - to no one's surprise - was Mozart, since he is attached to the kind of music he is familiar with (aren't we all?). But after prodding from both Jean, Le Comte and you giving him the puppy eyes, he finally relents. The day comes when everyone was once again free and for practicality everyone decided to have a meal first so that they won't be hungry during the show and also for you, Le Comte, and Sebastian to explain a few things everyone else may need to know to truly appreciate the show (like how the Presidential system and elections worked during the setting, what the word "Rewind" means, what is beatboxing, etc). So finally everyone gathered into the tech room after the meal, the lights were dimmed and once everyone was settled, you hit play. And as self-predicted of you, you find yourself crying in the end.

William Shakespeare (I'm still doing his route so please don't hate me if I get him wrong. Also no spoilers please).

- He was a bit shocked at first by how exactly up close you could see the facial expressions of the actors as well as the various ways it would cut to another person. He could now understand why you struggled with trying to explain how its played in a theatre but not exactly like the theatrical experience. But as you saw in your periphery, by the time Philippa Soo sings her first line, Will had already adjusted and allowed himself to be an audience and shut off his director and actor mindset (for the most part at least).

- While he didn't specialize in musicals, he found himself paying attention to the story of "the ten dollar founding father without a father." He knows how music could help both the actors and the audience in succumbing to their emotions in a scene and to suspend disbelief from reality. In his productions the words are not overwhelmed by any score but rather complemented to bring out the emotion he wants to evoke and for actors to show. Since many parts of the show has been influenced by the spoken word style without completely removing it from being sung, he has become enlightened with how powerful a show can be when it is done right.

- He not only enjoyed the story (especially the flow of it) and the production (especially some of the more technical details that the other residents hadn't noticed as far as a stage production is concerned), he loved that even the ensemble members had good acting and some of the onstage humor. One of the meta things he enjoyed was the obvious reference to his most superstitious work.

- Once you've seen how he loves analyzing the technical details of the production, you excitedly tell him about a special member of the ensemble who is known as "The bullet" among fans of the show. You could see him being enlightened as he watches the show with you again (this time with just the two of you) and he now sees "the bullet" and the way she interacts with the characters in a whole different light. He was so impressed with this idea that he may have adapted it into one of his new original plays (its not a copy paste of Hamilton's "bullet" but he definitely adapted assigning a member of the ensemble to have a special role that may not be significant at first, but he heavily notes that this member would have to be unique in interacting with any of the other characters).

- He didn't know what to expect from a 21st Century production but he found himself impressed with the prose and writing of various raps and songs. His favorite from Act 1 in terms of rhyme schemes was "Right Hand Man" and from Act 2 it was Jefferson's rap in "Washington by your side". And after settling down a bit his favorite emotional parts were "History has its eyes on you", "Hurricane", and "It's quiet uptown".

- He was impressed with how the double roles was given and how it actually is true for both of their roles in both acts. Ambiguity is one of his favorite things to have in a work, and he gives props to Lin for all the ambiguity he later realizes was in several parts of the show. If he and Arthur had been a little bit more closer, they probably would have bonded over the ambiguity Hamilton's comma in his letter to Angelica (see kids, grammar matters).

- A part of his brain wonders how the real life Hamilton would react to this and if him and Burr would still be enemies. But after some thinking he decides its not worth his efforts of asking anyone to bring them back since a wonderful production of their life has already been made even if it may not necessarily reflect who they truly are. He of all people knew what it's like to be inspired by great figures, it was fortunate that Lin Manuel Miranda decided to make a show about them before he had the chance to.

- You explain that in America Hamilton is one of the lesser known founding fathers of their nation and how it may be because his political opponents later on became Presidents and therefore was able to form the narrative. He becomes inspired by it and begins to search out people or stories who are hidden gems who may not be historically famous but had much more interesting stories than some of the ones he has heard of.

- Afterwards once you are sure that he has gotten comfortable enough with the genre you show him various videos of people rapping to his works and his reactions range from impressed to amused to "that's not what I mean when I wrote that" and you had to calm him down and explain that they can't hear him anyway after he started giving serious critiques on what the text means.

Arthur Conan Doyle

- While he was knowledgeable about many things, America's founding fathers was not one of them. He along with the other residents have gotten used to any rumors or exaggerated accounts of their lives and you and Sebastian have already warned that this is just a fictionalized production of the real person. As a writer of some historical fiction books he argued that he of all people was aware that any work based on history will speak more about the creators rather than the actual people they are writing about most of the time. He was nevertheless interested as to why you have become fascinated with the treasury secretary (and maybe it was with a twinge of jealousy that you began to expressly show admiration to another man even if he wasn't among the residents in the mansion). After all unlike many other residents of the mansion, on the surface it seemed that Hamilton was similar to Theo who mainly played a supporting but crucial role to his brother. He was thankful that you didn't hold it against him and was comforted that you were in a similar place. You even told him that the only thing you really knew about Hamilton before listening to the soundtrack and watching "Animatics" was that he was in the ten dollar American bill.

- And as someone who has delved into writing historical fictions, this was probably one of the most entertaining productions about a historical figure he has seen. He's going to be honest with you in that at first he was wondering if revealing Burr shot Hamilton in the opening was going to hinder him from enjoying the show; but he was pleasantly surprised that this was not the case at all. As a matter of fact it now made him want to find out who the real Hamilton was (although a part of him doubts if the real Hamilton had any regrets at all). According to him, this is why as a fictionalized historical work, the show is a success because it makes you want to find out more about the events and figures of the story (even if it means looking at darker realities that they did). And while the real Hamilton may be a lot different from what was shown, with all the things he went through and all the things he has done (for better or worse), he now wonders why exactly Le Comte hadn't approached him since he seems to be no better or worse than the average resident ("He and Newt could probably discuss mathematics all day."). You then explained that his political rivals (Jefferson and Madison from the show, and Monroe who wasn't shown in the musical) had later on become Presidents and was able to shape the narrative away from Hamilton. "Ron Chernow made Hamilton's biography because he was the lesser known founding father who was fading into obscurity among Americans and Lin read the book and recognized the story of someone who has risen through his writings. And to Lin that was also the story of hiphop." While he wasn't involved in politics as much as Hamilton was, Arthur had enough experience to know what it feels like to have those kinds of people in power. He also knows just how powerful it is to be in "the room where it happened" and how sometimes the real decisions weren't being made in an office but rather in either a private party or the right bar when people in power had their guard down and were more susceptible to being influenced.

- He could relate a lot with Hamilton on many things that he's only comfortable allowing either you or Theo to see. From being just so much more aware of death's inevitability coming for every living thing to survivor's guilt even though a part of him knows its irrational (but sometimes the emotional nonsense just overtakes our perspectives and actions). It's why he could understand Hamilton's need to write as much as he can before he dies. It's why for a time in his human life he had deviated from writing about Holmes and ventured into other genres. He could also relate to the need to prove what type of person he was, and how to go beyond his tragedies to serve people in their own ways. Hamilton did it as a soldier and the creator of America's financial system. And he is doing it as an informally practicing doctor and as a writer. It's a need that he's trying to mitigate since you've repeatedly told him that he doesn't need to prove anything to you or to anyone and to write whatever he pleases. But he also can't deny that it's still somewhere lodged in the back of his head.

- Just like William Shakespeare, in terms of the wordplay found in rap and the ambiguity present in the show and how those things were executed made him amazed and momentarily speechless. He was especially fanboying about "The comma after dearest" and how this essentially shows how important grammar was. It went to the extent that afterwards whenever he would write to you he would address you either as "My dearest, Y/N" or "My darling, Y/N" with special emphasis on the comma (sometimes you could see how there's more ink in the comma than some of the actual words. That's how much he wants to emphasize that you hold the title of dearest or darling). And you excitedly share with him some of the trivia knowledge of the show (like how in real life it was Angelica who originally made the comma mistake by writing to Hamilton as "My dear, sir" in one of her letters and it was Hamilton who was asking her what the comma means and even replied with "Ma chere, soeur") and how Angelica really did reference the Icarus metaphor in one of her letters to Eliza. And even though he wasn't a major musical nerd (he sang for fun), he would now join you in watching Howard Ho's Hamilton videos musically analyzing Hamilton (and would probably try to find a way to use this knowledge to annoy Mozart in some way).

- Speaking of music: Maybe it's because he's biased in his love for you but aside from Sebastian he's probably the one who has no qualms about the hiphop genre and was immediately into the various wordplays that rapping allowed. And because of this his favorite characters in terms of rapping are the ones played by Daveed Diggs (probably more than Hamilton himself even though you've explained that Lin is the one who wrote the whole thing). He even adapts to how Daveed as Jefferson would say Isaac's third law and incorporated it into his "let's tease Newton" kit. That's when you know he really loves Daveed Diggs ("Every action has an equal opposite -" "WILL YOU PLEASE STOP SAYING IT THAT WAY?! I didn't mind the first few times but this is ridiculous Arthur" "It must be nice, it must be nice to have a Newton on your side"). And his favorite character emotionally was Angelica (her raps in Schuyler Sisters and Satisfied may have helped).

- Speaking of the Schuyler Sisters, after watching it with you another time (this time with just the two of you) one of his favorite things to say is that you've got the best of all three sisters within you (Angelica's wittiness and intelligence, Eliza's cares for the more important things in life, and Peggy's humor) with the sexiness of Maria Reynolds. But because he sees all 4 of them in you he has the benefit of not needing to choose among them. Having said that there will be a period wherein he teases you if he makes you "Helpless" or "Satisfied" (and you respond either by kissing him or singing "That would be enough").

- Whenever you would sing as one of the Schuyler sisters he will join you as any of the male characters the moment he masters the soundtrack and could even sing it without the music. His favorite rap songs are "Guns and Ships", "Washington on your side", and of course "Satisfied". He also really loves "Non-stop", "the 10 duel commandments", and "The room where it happened". But his favorite sequence is from "the Winter's Ball" all the way to "Wait for it". Since it has romance, a shocking revelation, and gives insight to the perspective of the antagonist. He's also one of the first people to attempt to learn the choreography whenever he's in one of his mental blocks in writing. Of course he makes sure not to injure himself.

- He posts song lyrics to keep himself motivated in his times of mental block "There's a million things I haven't done. But just you wait" and "I'm not throwing away my shot" frequently appear around his desk.

-And whenever he's feeling low or insecure, just like Eliza you remind him to "Look around, Look around, how lucky we are to be alive right now."

#Ikemen Vampire #Headcanons #ikemen william #ikevamp #Hamilton #William Shakespeare #Arthur Conan Doyle #Ikemen Arthur #Lin Manuel Miranda #Daveed Diggs #Philippa Soo #Ron Chernow

[apenapaperandadoofus]

"least to most bottom of the RFA" you say 👀

CONSIDER THIS A REQUEST MY FRIEND

Hehehehehe THANK YOU

I actually came up with this bc I had a stress dream that I was writing request and I was writing smth like this and since then I have not thought of anything else ANSNSNSND

Least to most bottom MM characters:

12. Rika

This bitch will not. Back. Down.

She is a full on top, fuck you

Nah but really you will not make this woman bend down to your will, it has to be the other way. She has to feel the power! The control!

(and of course if we want to get into more of the psychological stuff it's also bc of that bitch ass pastor that did that to her as a child, and to him I wish him a very fuck you and fuck off, BUT ANYWAY)

This woman will not back down. If you try and make her a bottom she will act like she's backing down until she turns the tables and you're the one that's pinned against the bed or wall. It's a fight you cannot win 🙂

11. Unknown

No.

No matter how much you want to pin that little fucker down, he will not. Let. You.

He doesn't want to feel vulnerable.

Still, that doesn't mean he won't do it every once in a full moon or smth where hee will maaaaybe let you be the dominant one. Of course he will still be ordering you around, so who's really the one in control?

10. Jumin

Jumin is also a power top, although every once in a while he'd change the pace of things for a bit.

He wouldn't go super far as too havig to full on freaking beg, but he'd come pretty close to that point if you hold him down and start straddling him. He wouldn't mind getting tied up too y'know? Just not all the way. Maybe once in a while you can tie his arms behind him and straddle him, and he will literally go crazy because he just can't touch you, and you just feel. So. Good.

9. Vanderwood

He's a bottom brat whenever he switches andbdbfnfn

Listen, once in a while you'll both change pace, and he'll be all like "pft, your think you can make me kneel down? No way in hell." To be a few minutes later begging for you to let him come and to please, please just fuck him!

8. Suit

But Amanda, what about Unknown and how he wasn't a bottom? Isn't Suit basically Unknown but in his early stage?

And to that I say yes but I love brat bottom boys so you will have to deal with it ajdhdhdb

Listen to me.

TOPPING THIS MAN? YES PLEASE???

Also since he does still have a bit of Ray in him, y'know he likes being pinned down.

He will be an absolute bastard though. He will curse and yell the whole time, but then once you finally get him?

Oh he will beg for you non stop like Lin Manuel Miranda said in his Hamilton musical songs "Non-Stop"

He L O V E S being tied down. Not Lin btw I mean Suit lol.

Not with blindfolds tho, that would be far too much. But to be served his own medicine for once? Honestly he's kinda into it. He loves the dominant glint in your eye, how commanding you are, basically how you're not taking ANY of his BS.

It is my personal hc since I'm a horny bitch, that suit would actually be into being a bottom, but he's just a bit shy about it, and yes, he can be a top too which is why he's not all the way down, but you know being a bottom is a guilty pleasure for this boy.

He likes that shit.

7. Zen

He's also mostly a switch, except he isn't much of a brat. He's more of a chill bottom. You tell him you want to be on top today? Sure thing baby let me just get the blindfold.

He's totally up for it, and he loves seeing you taking control and being confident. That's what he likes the most. Of course, he'd much rather be the one gripping your wrists on top of you and banging ya like there's no tomorrow.

6. Jaehee

YES

This woman hasn't really dated anyone or anything except her work, so she's definetly a bit inexperienced. That's why she'll look to you to take the lead!

Jaehee should be spoiled alright, so please take care of this woman with your life and make her have the time of her life

5. GE! Saeran

This boy is also a sort of power bottlom. Sometimes he will take the lead and oh god, is he great at that, but other times? When he's a bottom, he's a BOTTOM

He will gasp and moan at every little touch, he absolutely adores getting praised, and he loves it when you watch him with that glint of lust in your eyes.

Boy when he's a bottom he's just: chefs kiss 💋👌👌

4. Saeyoung

He's also an amazing top, but when he switches and becomes a bottom he's also AMAZING. He's at the top of the bottoms (hahahaha funny)

He also likes being pinned down and given orders, to have to b e g.

He also likes praise a lot like his brother pft.

And he's also a lot into being tied up, blindfolds, all that. No matter if it's you or him. The only thing he's a bit iffy about is basically hitting him and for very obvious reasons, but appart from that he's up for anything wink wink.

3. Ray

Do I have to even explain? Like??? Do I really???

His middle name is BOTTOM.

When you look him up in the dictionary it says in bold letters and in the whole page BOTTOM.

His name means BOTTOM.

He's too shy to start anything up by himself, he needs you to take the lead so he knows he's not doing anything wrong. This boy will bend to your will so fucking easily, he's a fucking spaghetti, you can grab him and twist him around your finger akfkfnfn

Just praise him and he'll be so happy. Just imagine when -milking him dry- EHEM he'd just beg and his eyes would be all teary and OH LORD YES BOTTOM RAY ALL THE WAY WHOOP.

2. Yoosung

It is literally cannon he's a masochist. Literally. This boy loves it. He's like s puppy. He will look at you with adoration the whole time, and will follow all of your orders. He'd happily go down on all fours for you, he'd literally do ANYTHING

Also I have said this so many times and I will say it again,

P e g h i m

This man is PERFECT FOR IT, DON'T WASTE THE OPPORTUNITY AND TEASE THE FUCK OUT OF THIS MAN, MAKE 👏 HIM 👏 BEG👏

1. V

Dude. This man is a bottom and nothing else, NOTHING ELSE

PEG HIM TOO! (Pfttttttt basically the last two of the list are just me going PEG HIM over and over again lmao.)

You cannot tell me this man is a top. You simply can't.

He is a bottom boy. Just don't blindfold him bc ✨trauma✨

Appart from that tie him up, edge him do whatever else you want. This man will look at you with tears in the corner of his eyes, barely able to speak. "M-MC... please....I-I just c-can't anymore...." He'd whisper.

God I know he isn't my favorite but I would dffinetly date him just for this holy fuck.

God am I horny and touch starved I need jesus

Anyway now go and read the bible and bathe in holy water, and I'll save you all a spot next to me in hell :D

#mystic messenger #jumin han #saeyoung choi #saeran choi #choi bois #jihyun mysme #mysme #yoosung kim #jaehee kang #mysme zen

[i-make-random-song-parodies]

Historically accurate Hamilton

Hamilton faces a lot of criticism because of its historical inaccuracies, but people seem to forget that it isn’t supposed to be completely accurate. It’s historical fiction, and many details were tweaked to make the musical run more smoothly, make more sense, and generally be easier for an audience to follow. To emphasise my point, I rewrote some of Hamilton to show what it might have been like if it was completely historically accurate (or, parts of it. I’m not rewriting an entire musical).

NB: I am by no means a historical expert. The following is meant for comedy purposes only

For songs where multiple people sing, the speaker will be denoted by the following letters: B – Burr, H – Hamilton, L – Lafayette, J – John Laurens, M – Hercules Mulligan, T – Thomas Jefferson,

Use of the squiggles (~~~~~) means some of the song was skipped

I think that’s everything! Enjoy the musical!!!!!

♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪

Aaron Burr – Historically accurate

~~~~~

B: You punched the bursar?

A: Nope

~~~~~

Showtime! Showtime! Yo!

J: I’m John Lauren’s, in the place to be! It’d make sense for you to meet all three Of us together, but unfortunately It’s gonna be a while ‘til you finally meet me!

L: Oui oui, mon ami, je m'appelle Lafayette! And just like Laurens, I have not arrived yet I sing from afar and I say “bonsoir” To these strangers at the bar, they do not know moi

M: Brrrah brraaah! I am Hercules Mulligan Talking to myself, cos I don’t have a single friend Wait, I’m already friends with Alex Ham, And this introduction’s pointless, cos he knows who I am! No more people, we need a solution The two of us alone can’t start a revolution!

Well, if it ain't the prodigy of Princeton college! Aaron Burr! Give us a verse, drop some knowledge!

B: Good luck with that, you’re all on your own, Even Hamilton can’t start a revolution alone

M: Burr, the revolution's imminent. What do you stall for?

H: If you stand for nothing Burr, what’ll you fall for?

M: Who? Who are you?

H: ….. Hamilton? Your friend?

M: Oh. Right. Yea.

*awkward pause, then lights go down*

The Story of Tonight – Historically accurate

M: Raise a glass to the two of us

H: Why are there so few of us?

M: Not much is happening tonight

H: I need another drink tonight

M: They will forget about tonight

The Schuyler Siblings:

Angelica, Eliza, John, Philip, Rensselaer, Cornelia, Catherine, and Peggy The Schuyler siblings Angelica, Peggy, Eliza, John, Philip, Rensselaer, Cornelia, Catherine WORK!

The 25 Duel Commandments

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24

It’s the 25 duel commandments It’s the 25 duel commandments

Number 1:

Instead of giving a concise set of rules, To explain to the audience the basics about duels We’re gonna list every single commandment and derail The entire musical with unnecessary detail

Number 2:

Lee’s second wasn’t Aaron Burr it was his friend Major Evan Edwards, who you’re never gonna see again As Burr isn’t here, we miss some foreshadowing And Alexander’s death might not be as heart-shattering

Number 3:

Okay folks, this is taking too long We don’t have time for 25 commandments in one song By the time we finish you’ll have stopped paying attention So let’s just finish this, while there’s still some apprehension

Number 24: Look ‘em in the eye, aim no higher Summon all the courage you require Then count

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24

Number 25 paces fire!

Cabinet battle #1 – Historically Accurate

W: Secretary Jefferson, you have the floor

T: Life liberty and the pursuit of happiness We fought for these ideals we shouldn’t settle for less But I’m quiet and reserved, and not a fan of fighting So I’m just gonna give you my objections in writing

W: Thank you, Secretary Jefferson Secretary Hamilton, your response

H: Thomas, that was a real nice declaration You speaking up at all is a cause for celebration But obviously, there isn’t that much to discuss Seeing as you didn’t kick up much of a fuss My new financial system is a masterpiece Our debts will be sorted, our independence will increase Tell me if you have any suggestions or notes But I have high hopes that I can rely on your votes

W: Great. Meeting concluded.

Cabinet Battle #2 – Historically Accurate

W: The issue on the table, France is on the verge of war with England And do we provide aid and troops to our French allies Or do we stay out of it, remember My decision on this matter is not subject to congressional approval The only person you have to convince is me Secretary Jefferson, you have the floor, sir

T: I’d really like to help out France But I’m still too shy to make a whole song and dance

W: Thank you Secretary Jefferson. Secretary Hamilton, your response

H: Jefferson’s dumb, let’s not get involved I’m sorry but not every problem can be solved By recklessly running to join the fight We stay out of it. Thank you, and goodnight.

W: Hamilton’s right. Hamilton, draft a statement of neutrality

T: Did you forget Lafayette?

H: Nope

T: Ok then

Burn – Historically Accurate

~~~~~

I’m erasing myself from the narrative Historians have no idea how Eliza reacted So neither will you Sorry, but for historical accuracy this song is through

The world was wide enough – Historically Accurate

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24

There are 25 things you need to know There are 25 things you need to know

Number 1:

This duel was a long time coming You’d have known that if we hadn’t skipped most of the foreshadowing

Number 2:

A bunch of secondary characters were there I’d list all their names but you probably don’t care

Number 3:

The election wasn’t the main reason for Our duel. Hamilton, the bastard, son of a whore Tried to undermine me in my gubernatorial race So I told him “if you have something to say, name a time and place”

~~~~~

Number 24:

Look him in the eye aim no higher Summon all the courage you require Then count

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24

Number 25 paces fire!

He aims his pistol over my shoulder, and fires. I strike him right between the ribs

~~~~~

BONUS SONG:

Who lives, who dies, who tells your story – Historically Accurate Summary

Let me tell you what I wish I’d known When I was young and dreamed of glory You cannot write A good, historically accurate story

Lin Manuel Miranda I’ll give him this His Hamilton musical is a work of art I couldn’t correct it if I tried And I’ve tried

Lin Manuel Miranda He took your country from knowing nothing about Hamilton to knowing at least some stuff about him I’m happy to admit it He deserves all the credit he gets

A historically inaccurate but still incredible story

♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪

You still here? Well congrats for making it this far!!! I hope you enjoyed, please (please) leave a comment if you enjoyed it, I survive purely on the validation I receive from others, and feel free to send me requests if you want :)

Credit to where I got all my info:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zhrVjfVmAow&t=518s

https://www.tampabay.com/life-culture/2020/07/03/politifact-fact-checking-hamilton-the-musical/

https://screenrant.com/hamilton-historical-inaccuracies-wrong-true-story/

#parody #parodies #song parody #song parodies #hamilton #alexander hamilton #aaron burr #the story of tonight #history #the schuyler sisters #the 10 duel commandments #10 duel commandments #cabinet battle #cabinet battle 1 #cabinet battle 2 #burn from hamilton #the world was wide enough #who lives who dies #who lives who dies who tells you story #an excessive but necessary quantity of tags

[showtoonzfan]

https://youtu.be/bJS0miHn5aQ

WARNING: MENTIONS OF SUICIDE AND TRUAMA, DO NOT READ OR CLICK THE VIDEO IF YOU CAN’T HANDLE THESE ELEMENTS

So you may have seen this person floating around the Hamilton Fandom, and why wouldn’t you? Their animatics are AMAZING! I guess I should say now that yes, Hamilton is one of the musicals I adore. I can’t really say what anyone else has already said about this musical, it’s just a phenomenal show with great music, an amazing story, and SPECTACULAR actors. And yes, Lin Manuel Miranda is a musical genius. Anyway, back to this animatic! I decided to watch this one in particular, an animatic of a song called “Help” by “Pink guy”. It showcases Hamilton depressed, only for the end to have his whole life flash before his eyes, flashing images appearing on the screen. That is my FAVORITE part in the whole video, so please check out this person’s channel and their other work, because they are an amazing artist! Now why do I come to you today? Well, I was scrolling through the comments section, and I saw one comment that stuck with me, which was this:

Why did it stick with me? It stuck with me because, well.....that’s exactly how I view Alexander, just an annoying cheating prick who couldn’t appreciate what he had and always wanted his voice to be heard and to go bigger. He’s a character I despise, yes.....I know that’s a strong word but I despise him in the musical, and I’m not saying his writing was bad, I just don’t like him as a person for obvious reasons. Let it be known that I’m not talking about the big man HIMSELF, I’m just talking about his character in the MUSICAL and nothing else. So yeah, in my eyes he’s just an unappreciative asshole who, while he wanted to do what’s best, ended up making dumbass decisions and hurt his loved ones in the process, even being responsible for the death of his son (but that’s just my opinion). However, after this comment, I have to admit one thing.

I’m guilty for ignoring all the trauma he went through when I shouldn’t.

Hamilton’s mother died in his arms when he was little, his father left, his cousin committed suicide, the war happened, John Laurens died, his battle against Jefferson and Madison (as well as Burr) drove him mad, he had an affair and published it to the world, causing his wife to move away and resent him for years, his SON died, and despite being forgiven in the end, he met his own demise when Burr killed him. I think as a society, wether it be written characters OR real life, we need to realize that no matter how bad the person themselves may be, their trauma shouldn’t be ignored, no matter what. Trauma is certainly an important thing, it can change someone, it can either warp their mind and make them worse, or it could make them learn, causing them to grow as a person over time...and most importantly, it could be both.

I know I don’t act like it, but believe me when I say that I LIKE flawed characters, especially COMPLEX characters, which I don’t like, I love. If you ever really want a character to uphold to your audience, don’t have them be perfect, because NO one is perfect. Have them fuck up, because you want to prove that this could happen to ANYONE. This appeals to Alexander. He’s not one note, he’s a whole bunch of things, and yes, he’s a very complex character and I’m so thankful for that. I don’t like what he did or how he acted one bit, but he’s a flawed character. He fucked up, and when it comes to this, I think it’s fine to have a character do this (in his situation) AS LONG as they get the consequences coming to them, and that they grow as a person and LEARN their lesson.

So.....did Alexander suffer for his actions? Yeah, I would say he did. He couldn’t be president like he wanted, his wife hated him, and his son died. Did he learn his lesson and grow as a person? Well, on that subject for me personally, I hesitate. On one hand, during the song “Best Of Wives And Best Of Women”, the LAST time him and his wife are together before he duels, we see him writing something. Eliza comes to him and tells him to come back to bed, but he says he wants to finish writing, since he states he has “a meeting at dawn”, which surprise, is the duel. What he’s writing in this scene is his farewell letter to her because he knows he’s going to die, but she doesn’t know that. She tells him she’s going to bed, but before she leaves, his last words to her are “Best of wives, and best of women”. This little moment they share in the end, the last scene they have with one another is way too short, but the moment is strong none the less, and when you think about it, I think Alexander DID finally learn to appreciate his wife, everything she did, EVERYTHING they went through.

The other hand is him sacrificing himself. In the musical, he clearly chooses to die, putting his gun up in the air and letting Burr kill him, because he knew burr was going to shoot back. However I get a little confused, because I don’t know if Alexander originally planned to shoot back, and only then decided not to in the heat of the moment, or if he planned this when he was talking to Eliza for the last time. I dunno, but one thing is clear, in the end he chose to. At first, I was like “Dude really? First your dumbass did all of this, and now when you finally get your wife back, you leave the earth to make her even MORE upset?” But then I realized that I didn’t take 2 things into consideration. One, Duels back then were kinda a must, you’d be seen as weak if you didn’t go through with it. I’ve seen so many people say “why didn’t this man just stay home”, and yeah, I said that as well, but after looking at research of what a Duel truly meant back then, it’s understandable why he did, no matter how much it pisses me off lol. The second thing is the most important thing, the key to why I NOW think Hamilton actually DID learn his lesson....

He finally threw away his shot.

Throughout the whole musical, Alexander is constantly saying “I’m not throwing away my shot”, meaning he’s not going to miss an opportunity that gets handed to him. He gets the opportunity to let his voice be heard about the revolution, he takes it. He gets the opportunity to join forces with Washington, he takes it. He gets the opportunity to lead the soldiers in war, he takes it. Just like burr says, he takes and he takes and he takes. But finally, in the end, in the very end......he didn’t fight. Throughout all the screaming and the constant urge to protect his legacy and what he stood for, he FINALLY let it all go the minute he raised his gun in the air.

He could have fought back like he did with Jefferson. He could have wanted to not let his name be tarnished, not die at the hands of someone who used to be his friend, but he didn’t. He raised his gun in the air, and told his wife to take her time. Live on. Let me just say that the monologue Hamilton performs right before he’s shot is amazing. The bullet comes to him in slow motion, and he debates to himself what to do. Should he fire his gun or let it be? Then he asks himself what a legacy is, something he kept striving for, to protect his legacy. The line that I think is the most important is “You let me make a difference”. Here, for me, it seems like he finally learned that he did what he wanted. He changed the world and let his voice be heard, and now, he can rest, and let his wife live on, who will soon carry his own name. Basically what I’m saying is, I think he learned his lesson because after trying to do so many things throughout the entire musical and NEVER giving up, he finally did. It resulted in his demise yes, but he still let it all go, creating a life his wife could live in. And yes, I think he did finally learn to appreciate his wife.

So what are my final thoughts? Well, if I’m going to be honest, I still don’t really like Alexander as a character. It’s mainly all the mistakes he makes, mainly the freaking CHEATING that pisses me off but I WILL SAY THIS. After this talk with.....basically myself, I think I’ve now learned to appreciate him and respect him (just a tad) as a character, but not just as a character, as a human being. I know that doesn’t sound....big, but believe me, it’s a huge thing when you take into consideration that I didn’t like this dude AT ALL. Like, every time I saw him on screen I wanted to wring his neck so......(also it doesn’t have to do with Lin’s acting lol, just the character.) So yeah, what I just said is saying a LOT. I will once again point out I don’t think the writing for him is bad, it’s honestly phenomenal if you asked me, it’s just the actions. But again, characters are flawed ya know? So my friends, as we come to a close, what do YOU think of Alexander’s character in the show? Do you like him? Do you think he learned his lesson in the end? Do you think he should have been forgiven? Let me know in the comments if you want! Thank you for reading as always, and I’ll see you in the next post! 👋💕

Oh.....uhm.....what do I think of the REAL Alexander Hamilton? Uhm..........not a really good person, but a man who had a huge affect on our world, so....props to him for that. But he’s still not a good person in my eyes really......okay bye.

#Youtube #alexander hamilton #hamilton musical #Hamilton #broadway #hamilton broadway #lin manuel miranda #my opinion #some theories in here #WHY COULDN’T HE SAY NO DAMMIT #eliza hamilton #Hamilton Lin Manuel Miranda #disney #Disney plus #stage show #musicals #musical talk #character rants #unrelated

[englandsgray]

Sherlolly Self-Interviews 2020

Well hi 👋

Ignoring the internal image of Gilderoy Lockheart smiling smugly while flashbulbs pop and saying ‘In my autobiography, Magical Me...’ 🙈😆 I shall take the opportunity of this lovely event to introduce myself as a writer of Sherlolly fanfiction on AO3...

I am English and somewhere over 30.  I watched the show as it aired, and lost my heart as quickly to Molly Hooper as to Sherlock Holmes.  The kiss is British television history.  Series 4 is my favourite.  Moriarty on the beach is life.  The Holmes brothers break my heart every time.

I am extremely lucky to have been provided some questions to answer here by @ohaine and @mybrainrots - huge, huge love and thanks to these two lovelies, and not just for this.  I admire you both so much as writers, and your support means the world to me ❤️ Thanks too, to @sherlollyappreciationweek!

Where did you begin to write, and have you written for other fandoms?  I wrote my first fanfic when I was eleven years old - a 100 page ramble about The Monkees.  Oh yes.  Then in 2018, I fell for the characters of the Disney Pixar film Cars and began writing and publishing.  So far so random!  Writing in this fandom sprang from binge-watching all four series of Sherlock during lockdown.  I remembered reading Louise Brealey talking about being disappointed Molly didn’t get chance to ‘roundly kick Sherlock’s arse’ and agreeing with her wholeheartedly.  That, over a few weeks, turned into my first fic - Who You Really Are.  

You’re a recent (and welcome!) arrival to the Sherlolly ship, and I was wondering if writing in an established, less active than it used to be fandom has been a challenge?   Thank you, firstly.  My experience of this fandom has been incredibly positive - the sense of welcome has been wonderful.  I will admit I was terrified posting the first fic - there are hundreds of times more stories posted daily in the Sherlock fandom as in the one I had some experience of.  But I needn’t have worried, it’s been a blast.  I will also admit, that it’s no small thing to be surrounded by such brilliant writing and the long-standing passion which goes with it.  But I find that inspiring in itself, and I’m very glad to be here - how supportive the fandom are makes me feel like I always have been!       

What’s your favourite place and way to write?  My aesthetic is Lin-Manuel Miranda in his in-law’s laundry room 🤣 I wrote my first ten-thousand words on the notes app on my phone before my other half told me to stop being ridiculous!  I switch between the laptop, my phone and longhand (I’m a sucker for a nice notepad and a Uni-Ball Eye) and, more often than not, not sat up properly at a table.   

Since you’ve (done something I’ve never managed successfully and) written a novella length fic... how did you organise/keep track of all the details and where you wanted the story to go?  Did you outline/plot in advance?  First of all - I would love to see a novella length fic from you @mybrainrots!  The final scene of Who You Really Are came to me very early on and I knew I wanted the fic to fit within TFP - a lot of it takes place in the timeframe of the final montage.  At first, it was going to be much more about Sherlock’s relationship with the ideas of sentiment and love (the phrase ‘I’m not sentimental about you, I love you,’ haunted me for a while) and I spent some time researching the psychology and playing with scenes from throughout the series - one of my favourites I didn’t go on to use was inspired by the final scene of THoB.  Using scenes from the canon gave an automatic structure, and I was always aiming for the final one I wrote early on - the two of them on the beach (everything is about the beach, with me!)  As I went along and started, inevitably, to slow down, I mapped out the chapters with a short note of what I wanted to be in each, then would add notes or phrases as they came to me - often emailed from my phone!  I had to force myself through a tricky section set in Baker Street at one point, but it came together in the end.  I did plot The Pathologist’s Skeletons on paper first, as I found with a casefic which remains a WIP, that I can get confused and lose focus when it comes to details and how to reveal them in a way which stays paced and interesting.  I’ll certainly do that from now on with longer stories and cases.  How did you keep up enthusiasm for the work?  I want to write an original novel, so I am forcing myself to work through the knotty bits and blocks as a learning experience.  Not everything is destined to be finished or finessed, of course, but I’m finding this process is building my confidence that I can overcome problems and slow periods.  I also find I know when I need some external inspiration - some of my favourite scenes have come to me while out walking the dog or sitting on the beach.  I’ve also been inspired by books or other series or things going on in the world, as we all are, and sometimes that’s pushed me on.  Plus, of course, I’m a newbie - I’m very much in the honeymoon period of my writing, even though I’ve loved Sherlock for ten years! (Ten years! Bonkers.) 

You’ve got a knack for writing Sherlock’s thoughts and capturing his voice.  That said, which character do you find easiest to write?  Which is the hardest?  Thank you so much.  I absolutely love writing Sherlock and Mycroft, and I’m sure that’s because they suit my somewhat over-the-top writing style!  I find Molly and her POV really difficult.  I want the scenes I write from her perspective to sound completely different to Sherlock, but that means writing in a style which doesn’t come as naturally to me.  I’m a long way off happy with that at the moment, but I’m enjoying the challenge.

Is there a scene or character that specifically inspired you to start writing Sherlolly?  The whole of TFP, but especially from the moment Sherlock arrives at Musgrave onwards.  I am desperate to see what a Sherlock Holmes who has been reacquainted with his own heart would look like.  I find his emotionality in those final scenes hugely compelling (Mycroft’s office is one of my favourite moments from across all four series) and, as I have always believed in him and Molly, I practically jumped up back in May after watching it and said ‘right, where’s my notebook?!’.

There’s a lovely peaceful, quiet feeling to your fic ‘We’re All Right At The Moment’.  Can you tell us what inspired it and if you’ve thought of doing the backstory that goes with it?  Thank you!  Like everyone, I would go back to January of this year and start again in a heartbeat, but I am hugely fortunate to be able to say that I have a lot to be grateful to the UK lockdowns for.  I might never have begun writing in this fandom otherwise, for one, and I have had a brilliant time so far and met some lovely people. Honestly, I don’t feel able to do any sort of justice in my writing to what has happened in the world in any broader sense than drawing on my own experiences of staying at home and enjoying my family.  This particular super-short fic sees Molly cutting Sherlock’s hair at home in Baker Street.  I wrote it in the evening after I had cut my other half’s hair and had been reminding myself that despite how horribly worried I was - and still am - about everything, we were all right in that moment, and to focus on that as much as possible.  I wanted to try to capture that, if for no reason other than to look back on this entire experience and remember something lovely, so I am so pleased to hear you felt the fic did that.  It was only after I finished it and reread it, that I realised it is ambiguous as to whether Molly is worried about Sherlock contracting the virus, or whether she is remembering him being treated for it... As I say, I don’t think I could write more about these extraordinary circumstances - perhaps it’s just too close at the moment - so I don’t plan on extending it.  But you know how it is, the plot bunnies hop where they will... 

Do you have a Sherlolly music playlist?  What are your top five favs from the list? Here’s a run down of (6 🙊) songs I have been getting emotional over in the last little while, leading my brain to assign their significance to my favourite couple...

Kissing You - Des’Ree - It’s so 90′s, it’s a bit cheesy, it’s oddly disturbing.  It helped me write A Request, Made Properly, and that gave me an excuse to have Sherlock kiss Molly in the snow.

How Long Will I Love You? - Ellie Goulding - part of the playlist, but also in remembrance of a friend who passed away recently.  Life is very short, love is forever.

High and Dry - Jamie Cullum - It’s made me emotional for a very long time.  The original is my partner’s version of choice, this is mine.  

Think About You - Delta Goodrem - Okay, this one isn’t emotional, and it’s not my usual vibe!  Blame the zoom exercise class I do!  But oh my goodness, it’s Molly.  Bless her.

Blinded By Your Grace (P.T.2. F.T. MNEK) - Stormzy - One of the best ever, I reckon.  Spent an awful lot of time thinking about angels and demons, grace and what it takes to save someone, while writing my latest - The Pathologist’s Skeletons.  This has been in my head most of the (blimmin’) time!

Love Me Like You Do - Ellie Goulding - I didn’t know I was a fan of Ellie until I wrote this list... I don’t subscribe to the theory that the love Molly wants or that which Sherlock has to offer is any lesser because it isn’t ‘normal’ or expected. I don’t think romantic entanglement would come easy to either of them. But it’s still love and it would be beautiful.

Thank you so much for reading.  Thanks and love to @ohaine and @mybrainrots. And thank you @sherlollyappreciationweek for the event and for everything you do ❤️

Feel like I should sign off with a quote from the show...

“You’re not a puzzle-solver, you never have been. You’re a drama queen!” Dr John Watson (Moffat & Gatiss) 2014 😜

X

A fav fic of mine by @mybrainrots

https://archiveofourown.org/works/7563193

A fav fic of mine by @ohaine

https://archiveofourown.org/works/10562904

My stuff:

https://archiveofourown.org/users/EnglandsGray/works

#sherlolly #sherlollyselfinterview20 #sherlock #sherlockbbc #writing #fanfic #ao3 #ao3 author #read on ao3

[estelscinema]

tick, tick... Boom!

On the cusp of his 30th birthday, a promising theater composer navigates love, friendship, and pressure of the life of an artist in New York City.

As stated in previous reviews I am not the biggest fan of movie musicals. I personally find that musicals just don't translate well to the big screen. However, I am willing to watch something different, so tonight I decided to delve into tick, tick... Boom!. After watching this film, I am left indifferent. At no point was I able to get into this film. I was quite bored by the music, and the overall space of this film. The only thing that was able to keep my attention was Andrew Garfield's performance.

Please take this review with a grain of salt. I am pretty sure that if you are someone who loves this genre then you are going to love this film, if not you are going to be left indifferent. Director Lin-Manuel Miranda does what he can with the musical. He tries to tell this musical in a new light, but in the end, it felt like any other musical. Despite all of the songs being well sung, hardly any of the numbers felt magical. The story is quite slow and even convoluted at points. The writing is also stereotypical at many points. In the end, this film feels like any other musical.

One of the few saving graces of this film was its performances. Andrew Garfield is fantastic in this film. His back must hurt because he carried the majority of this movie. His voice is beautiful and innocent. I am expecting him to get an Oscar nomination because his performance in this film was that good. Another performance I liked was from Robin de Jesus. He brought a nice balance to Garfield's performance and the two had great chemistry with one another. Alexandra Shipps is okay in this film. For me, she didn't really bring anything to the screen besides the fading relationship girlfriend. Her performance works where it's needed but nothing really outstanding. Everyone else in this film is pretty good.

The technical aspects in this film aren't really anything special. The cinematography was quite bland, with the exception of a few shots. As stated, the musical numbers were well sung but had no magic to them. The visual effects were really bad. I mean those birds looked really bad. The costumes and production design felt more like the 2000s than the early 90s.

It feels like this musical was one that would not adapt well to the big screen. The actual musical has three people and it's them standing on a stage for two hours singing. this is probably why this film fails for me. If they decided to tell Jonathan's story in a more traditional manner, then it could have worked a lot better. When they broke into song I had a hard time taking the film seriously.

Overall, tick, tick... Boom! is pretty mediocre with the exception of a couple of standout performances. However, if you are someone who loves movie musicals then you are going to love this film. If you are someone who is not a fan of the genre, then you are going to be left indifferent.

I am giving tick, tick... Boom!, a C.

#film #cinema #movies #cinephile #cinematography #filmmaking #film review #movie review #film critic #review #musicals #musical theater #broadway #broadway musicals #jonathan larson #rent #tick tick boom #lin manuel miranda #andrew garfield #robin de jesus #alexandra shipp

[lesserfandomappreciation]

Hello hello!  Thank you that’s really kind of you!!! I love your writing (congrats on Chap 9, it was awesome)!

Personally I am terrible at flirting or even understanding how it works, so I did my best with this. Hope it comes across as good!

This wound up longer than expected, whoops! Flirting with Self-conscious s/o ( Red Shoes and the 7 Dwarfs )

Arthur

Charm out the wazoo. Arthur’s boisterous personality combined with his a princely upbringing and deeply instilled ideas on what a knight should be have created an inherent need to be charming when he’s interested in someone. It can range from surprisingly smooth to over-the-top. He’s pretty good at coming up with them on the go too, responding to what may be an innocuous question with a decent line.

His lines come in three main forms. 

Traditional knight/ye olde romantic keeping ideas of courtly wooing.

“May I join you, milady/milord?”

“Should you feel fear let me know. It’s a warrior’s duty to protect that which he treasures.”

Painfully, genuinely sweet lines that work only because he’s showing his real self and is not being over-the-top.

“Could I... hold your hand?”

Boasting: AKA showing off his muscles and hyping himself up (desperate moves he thankfully only rarely uses now thanks to his experience with Snow White)

The issue with all of these is that they come across as a bit fake or showy, as this type of flirting really isn’t for everyone. So a line missing when flirting with his self-conscious s/o is something he sort of expected. He doesn’t think it’s because they’re self-conscious, Arthur just thinks he messed up.

The way the self-consciousness manifests itself is going to change the way he reacts. For example, if they withdraw a lot, he’s going to think he really goofed it and is going to apologize, asking for clarification on what he did wrong so that he doesn’t do it again. That’s a very different reaction than if s/o were to bluntly tell him they didn’t believe him, leaving him dumbfounded.

The first reaction aside, Arthur would want to let them know he genuinely meant it, but his own lack of experience would really get in the way of that. How does he go about this? Him being him though, he would confront them directly about it and in that moment let his inner sweetheart shine as he makes it clear that he meant what he said. 

If they want to explain why they feel that way about themselves, great he’ll listen, but even if they don’t he asks them to not speak about themselves that way. They’re too wonderful to be hateful towards themselves.

After that the prince makes it a point to compliment them every single day. It’s not even always flirting, it’s straight up compliments. Their smarts, their passions, their looks, their hands, their eyes - everything is free game, and he’s not going to stop giving sincere compliments until they get it through their heads he likes them for them for a reason, and they should too. 

Pino

Stating facts about them counts as flirting, right? Cards on the table I don’t think Pino is really capable of flirting well, at least not on purpose. Yes, he’s mature and the eldest but that doesn’t necessarily equip him for the terrifying world that is interpersonal relationships outside of family. To even try to flirt takes a massive amount of pondering before he lets out a single word

His flirting, thus, is not so much flirting as it is:

A) stating things he likes about them/ Sort of.

“You are very smart. And strong. Strong and smart. Smrong.”

“You are a good size.”

B) complimenting them about something they did.

“Good job.”

“’You did good with that.” 

C) Giving up and just staring silently trying to think of something to say. Anything. Come on brain you helped build a selfie machine surely stringing words together isn’t that hard.

That one video of Lin-Manuel Miranda chanting “Come on brain, think of things.”

D) Any of the above, only his brothers are there to be the world’s best worst okayest wingmen.

The thing is, is that with this style of flirting barely comes across as flirting. S/o or not, it is going to be very difficult for anyone to pick up on any of this as intentional romantic interest rather than Pino being... Pino. Most people would maybe register this as awkward platonic compliments, if even that. His insecure s/o’s self-consciousness may not kick in for a while until they figure out that this is Pino desperately trying to show intentions.

Someone give this man cue cards he’s hurting.

Actually no don’t do that his brothers might get ideas. 

Despite this terrible inability to communicate romantic feelings, Pino does have one thing going for him. A stupid amount of emotional knowledge courtesy of keeping an eye on his brothers. Pino’s not dumb. When it comes to the people he really cares about he can get a good read on them. His s/o is no different. 

Upon realizing that s/o, the same s/o he has been pining after for weeks of awkward semi-flirting, has self-conscious issues, Pino is baffled. Bamboozled. Confusioned. Setting his own feelings to the side, the eldest brother works up the nerve to tell them full throttle that they are awesome. He doesn’t know what they have been through, nor where the feelings come from, but he will not let this stand. He is a little curt and blunt, but the intent is there.

If his s/o says 1 tiny negative thing about themselves, he’s armed with something they cannot deny. Facts. Pino has been debating his brothers for years, he will make charts if he has to.

Noki

Constant non-stopping stream of compliments. Noki is what happens when a fidget spinner is outfitted with an energy-drink powered engine. Pino, Hans and Jack can only somewhat keep him from vibrating into another dimension, and that’s with their powers combined. When he has someone in his sights, that energy is re-focused on making his s/o feel like royalty. 

Flirting is, if nothing else, absolutely amazing to witness in just how it is:

One constant stream of consciousness that results in compliment after compliment.

“That’s amazing, you’re amazing, that hat really suits you-”

“Your hair looks really nice today, though it usually looks nice every day-”

Painfully, unapologetically, sincerely sweet, gen-u-ine statements that could give anyone a bad case of sugar rush. 

“Why wouldn’t I want to be here? I really like spending time with you, you’re a really fun person.”

“When you smile your noise gets all crinkly and it’s super cute, you’re like a kitten!”

Cheesy, horrible one-liners that were bad in high school then and are bad in current times now. 

“Do you have a map? I keep getting lost in your eyes.” 

^^^^ That’s as much as I’m writing on that, this stuff is painful.

The painful part in all of this is that Noki, being Noki, is going to have no flippin’ clue that his s/o is feeling about this until he starts paying very close attention to their reactions. Are they turning away from him because they are hiding a blush, or because they are hiding tears? Are they blushing and incoherent because he’s just that good, or because they have no idea how to respond, this is a new experience to them, someone please show them mercy and send help. 

“Wait, you don’t believe me??? Why?!” Noki is not going to hide his bewilderment at all. This whole time he’s been flirting with them and they thought he was kidding??? He thought he was bad at this, not that they were going through some insecurities he may be encountering for the first time. He is going to sit down next to them, and s/o has about two seconds to decide whether or not they’re going to talk about it, because otherwise he is.

“You are amazing though! Everyone knows it! Snow White, Merlin, Sword-head, Hans, Jack, my brothers- we all know it! Do you think I could invent something that can possibly help this? You should have to go through life thinking badly of yourself when the world is a brighter place because of you! I-” 

TBH I do not have room for the whole rant here, but essentially this would likely wind up with him confessing because this is painfully obvious. 

By the end of this, he plans to make them blushy every single day until they see the them he sees, and beyond that too!

Kio

Shy sweetness that will punch you in the stomach when you least expect it. Oh you thought because he’s shyer and quieter than his brothers (and the entirety of the F7) that he isn’t capable of delivering some one-hit KOs using nothing but his words? You thought?! Pino is awkward but mature, Noki is a ball of constant validation, but Kio will use his reputation for shyness as an excuse to flirt out of the blue and then move on like nothing happened. 

Personal touch may be awkward for him but verbally making his s/o a goober just like him is his secret to being confident with his words. His s/o is in for it. 

Kio is a sneaky bastard who has the least range of flirtation (only 2 types really) but boy oh boy are they wildly different. 

The supreme sweetness that Noki (most of the boys if we’re being honest) take notes on when they want to be sweet to their loved ones.

“That’s a new bracelet isn’t it? It’s really suits you, you make it look good.”

“All your expressions are lovely but when you smile, the whole world seems brighter.”

The, ah, spicy stuff that none of the F7 besides Pino know that he is capable of uttering. Pino has no proof and is going crazy trying to prove to the group that the youngest brother can be downright heated with his flirting. 

“I could see you anywhere and be happy. Outside. Inside. In a house. In the bed. Especially the last one.”

“Your eyes are not the only part of you I could get lost in.”

Kio does not have the problem of not being clear in flirting. He’s not subtle. At all. As you’ve seen in some of the examples. The problem is that it can be a lot for a person to process, especially one that has self-consciousness issues. It really is out of the blue, which can throw the other person off when they’re not expecting it. Which is always. 

Thankfully, he is the happy middle between Noki and Pino’s ability to sense that something is wrong. It does take him a bit to pick up on it, but eventually he puts two and two together to realize s/o really is reacting oddly. Not in that they’re shy, but that there’s an underlying issue. It does take him a while to talk about it though because he has no clue how to approach it. It’s not a subject he’s good at tackling. 

The thought his s/o is going through this solo though does get him to gently pull them aside and ask them about it. He wants to know if it’s him overstepping into a very uncomfortable territory, if it’s specific things that trigger a certain response or if it’s something else entirely. Kio is a good listener, and mentally remembers a lot of notes for the next time he wants to compliment them. 

Very much makes it a point to let them know that hey, he likes them for them, and that yes, he is going to continue to give specific compliments their way because he adores them and they are worth it. 

#Red Shoes and the 7 Dwarfs #rsat7d #imagine

[justalittlelitnerd]

What If It’s Us by Becky Albertalli and Adam Silvera

“I don’t know if we’re a love story or a story about love. But I know whatever we are that it’s great because we kept jumping through the hoops in the first place.”

I didn’t think this story could possibly be cuter than I expected to be but it was. It far surpassed my expectations with it’s quirky, insecure ensemble of characters and the story was written in a way that convinced me to accept such an open ending when usually that’s my biggest pet peeve.

Overall, this story is just a fun take on a whirlwind summer romance because it pulls in all the weird, slightly crazy aspects of modern dating like missed connections and the ease of internet stalking. It was exactly what I needed as a counterbalance to the dumpster fire that is 2020 and if you’re looking for that brief escape into a wholesome, awkward romance and story about first loves and second chances and the complexity of dating and friendships than I would highly recommend!  

My only semi-complaint were the issues within Arthur, Jessie, and Ethan’s friendship could’ve been fleshed out more to do justice to the time the authors took to flesh out the side characters and their relationships with the main characters. I felt like that fight didn’t balance out the fight Ben had with Dylan because it was clear how that disagreement was building over the course of the summer. Also it felt too obvious that Jessie and Ethan were secretly dating and I was confused and unsatisfied by Ethan’s explanation that he didn’t text Arthur back the whole summer simply because it felt like lying and didn’t think twice about how ignoring Arthur (especially right after he came out) would make him feel. Also the whole time it made it seem like Arthur and Jessie were slightly closer and she had no qualms texting him and lying to him all summer and let’s just say I’m not as forgiving as Arthur was.

Let me know your thoughts!

Keep reading for some fun quotes I saved!

Normally, being an intern is more boring than terrible, but today’s uniquely shitty. You know that kind of day where the printer runs out of paper, and there’s none in the supply room, so you try to steal some from the copier, but you can’t get the drawer open, and then you push some wrong button and the copier starts beeping? And you’re standing there thinking that whoever invented copy machines is this close to getting their ass kicked? By you? By a five-foot-six Jewish kid with ADHD and the rage of a tornado? That kind of day? Yeah.

I believe in love at first sight. Fate, the universe, all of it. But not how you’re thinking. I don’t mean it in the our souls were split and you’re my other half forever and ever sort of way. I just think you’re meant to meet some people. I think the universe nudges them into your path.

Ex-boyfriend. Which means Box Boy dates guys. And okay. Wow. This doesn’t happen to me. It just doesn’t. But maybe the universe works differently in New York. Box Boy dates guys. I’M A GUY.

It’s weird—now I want to prove it. I want some gay ID card to whip out like a cop badge. Or I could demonstrate in other ways. God. I would happily demonstrate.

“On the sad scale, how are you feeling today?” Dylan asks. “Opening-montage-of-Up sad? Or Nemo’s-mom-dying sad?” “Whoa, no. Definitely not opening-montage-of-Up sad. That shit was devastating. I’d guess I’m somewhere in between, like last-five-minutes-of-Toy-Story-3 sad. I just need time to bounce back.”

“Let’s talk about why you really didn’t mail the breakup box,” Dylan says, like he’s going to bill me for this conversation. “Only if you drop the therapist voice,” I say. “Maybe we can begin with why my tone bothers you. Do I remind you of an authority figure?”

I’m certain that I’m 100 percent gay because if I was even 1 percent bisexual I would be crushing hard on Samantha for looks and high energy alone. Dylan watches Samantha as if she were glowing, and I wonder when I went dim for Hudson. If I ever really glowed for him at all.

“I would love to start my own app games. I have this one idea. It’s like Frogger, but instead of heavy-traffic streets, it takes place on the sidewalks of New York. You die if you get hit with someone’s shopping cart and you lose points if you cross a tourist’s path while they’re taking photos.

Emotional blue balls. That’s what it feels like. It’s being handed everything you’ve ever longed for, only for it to slip through your fingers. And there’s no way to fix it. Nothing you can do but slink toward the kitchen counter in a full-body mope.

"You’re not being fair to yourself,” Dylan says. “Maybe not. But I’m being honest.”

It’s this strangling fear that we’ll be sitting there and we’ll run out of something to say and I’ll be able to witness the exact moment someone falls out of love with me because I don’t have enough substance to keep a conversation alive over a meal. Why would you want to talk to me for the rest of your life?

But no. Not even close. Instead, it’s me bleeding out all my neuroses, looking for answers to questions I have no right to be asking. But I don’t know how to make myself stop asking them. People like me should come with a mute button.

I have only said one word on this call—a call I made—and I’m already ready to settle into another few hours of Arthur rambling. It’s better than my favorite Lorde and Lana Del Rey songs.

“You can sing a different song next time,” I say. I like that we’ll have a next time. That even though things have gone wrong, we’ve tried to make it right. “So I was nervous to admit this at karaoke, but—” “Please don’t tell me you’re actually a bunch of rats wearing a cute boy as a disguise.” “Worse.” I take a deep, dramatic breath. “I haven’t listened to Hamilton.” He doesn’t say anything. Then the line goes dead.

I tell him how I want to write Hamilton and Harry Potter crossover fanfiction and call it The Great American Fantasy Novel and stage all those duels in the dueling club and what houses I would sort everyone in.

“All history should be taught through rap by Lin-Manuel Miranda.”

“How lucky we are to be alive right now, right?” “Oh my god, you’re speaking Hamilton—I’m just so into you. I’m helpless.” I’m so into him too.

“For the most part, I think. But every city has its assholes.” I want to hug him, but he doesn’t want to be touched right now. Like any affection is going to become a target sign on our backs. Like we’ll get punished because our hearts are different.

But it’s just like the old posts on Instagram that I can’t get myself to just delete. Like Hudson never happened. Like he’s someone to be ashamed of. And throwing away the good memories feels like a slap in the face to our history. It has nothing to do with the future.

When the song ends, I’m ready to apologize. But Arthur takes my phone and looks up a cover of “Only Us” from Dear Evan Hansen, and he comes closer to me as he sings the words “So what if it’s us, what if it’s us, and only us.” This song is so beautiful. What it feels like to be wanted by someone who sees you for who you are. How the world—the business of Times Square—can feel like it’s falling away when you’re with the right person.

But maybe this isn’t how life works. Maybe it’s all about people coming into your life for a little while and you take what they give you and use it on your next friendship or relationship. And if you’re lucky, maybe some people pop back in after you thought they were gone for good.

Maybe I’m feeling masochistic. Or maybe I’ve unlocked the secret, and this is how people focus. All you have to do is have a cute boy rip your heart out, then let your best friends stomp all over it, and if it’s still beating even a little bit, finish the job yourself. Say the worst things and yell your voice raw and destroy everything you love until, lo and behold, the monotony of work is a relief.

I don’t know how to tell Hudson that I want to throw away a box of things that used to mean everything to me. But that fucking box. I can’t keep treating it like something that belongs in a museum’s exhibit specializing in one guy’s history of breaking hearts.

“Do not ask any what-if questions about you and Hudson dating again. That would probably end in literal heartbreak at the hands of someone pretty familiar with the law because of his summer internship but too reckless to care.”

It’s hard to be a fully functioning Arthur when your heart lives in four envelopes.

I can’t lose you forever. You can’t be someone I just knew for one summer. I have to know you every summer.

#what if it's us #Becky Albertalli #adam silvera #ya #young adult #summer romance #mlm #nyc #coming of age #friendship #books #book quotes #book blog #booklr #quotes #just some softbois falling in love during a summer in nyc #lots of hamilton references

[alicedoessurveys]

Doctor Who Tag

yes im a nerd...

CHILDHOOD

1. Did you like DW as a child?

I was 10 when it came back on telly with Eccleston and the first episode with the autons scared me so much my mom wouldn't let me watch it again until a couple years later, but yeah my teens I was obsessed with DW... still am at age 25

2. Your age at the time of the revival?

10

3. First DW episode you ever saw?

‘Rose’

4. Did you have any of the toys?

I still have the eleventh doctor’s screwdriver... I used to have some of the figures but there in storage now somewhere

5. Which DW character did you play on the playground?

didn't play it on the playground

6. Monster(s) that scared you most as a child?

all of them! the ones that still scare me now are the Cybermen and the Autons... genuinely cant walk past a shop mannequin without being suspicious 

7. Joke/story you didn’t get as a kid?

as a kid, any of the innuendo type jokes

8. DW opinion that has changed since you were a kid?

idk I think I still have the same opinions

9. Who introduced you to DW?

parents

10. Did you like Sarah Jane Adventures as a child?

I LOVED SJA!! I miss that show, and Elizabeth Slade :(

DOCTOR

11. Who is your Doctor?

Ten was the doctor that made me fall in love with Doctor Who 

12. Your favourite Doctor?

omg why not just ask me who my favourite child is... (I don't have kids but you know what I mean) if I had to chose my top three are ten, eleven and thirteen

13. Least favourite Doctor?

purely just because he doesn't have enough episodes... nine...

14. Best regeneration?

none of them I hate regenerations :( they make me sad, im too emotionally invested in every single one

15. Do you like “Doctor-Lite” episodes?

they're not my faves

16. Who is the most human Doctor?

I think nine maybe? or twelve?

17. Best multi-Doctor story?

the 50th anniversary special 

18. Best Doctor monologue?

“Hello Stonehenge! who takes the pandorica, takes the universe. but bad news everyone, cause guess who? HA! You lot you're all whizzing about- its really very distracting. Could you all just stay still a minute because I AM TALKING. Question of the hour is, who's got the pandorica? Answer, I do. Next question, who's coming to take it from me? Come on, look at me! No plan. No backup. No weapons worth a damn. oh and something else, I don't have anything to lose. So, if you're sitting up there in your silly little spaceship with all your silly little guns and you've got any plans on taking the pandorica tonight... just remember who's standing in your way. remember ever black day I ever stopped you and then- AND THEN- do the smart thing... let somebody else try first.”

not copied and pasted, remember that from the top of my head... its always there waiting in my mind incase I ever need an epic monologue :’)

19, What do you think TenToo/MetaCrisis Doctor is doing now?

hopefully living his best life with Rose

20. Best Doctor/companion pairing?

ten and donna 

COMPANIONS

21. Favourite companion?

Donna, Clara, Amy

22. Favourite secondary companion?

is Mickey classed as secondary? idk

23. Least favourite companion?

Ryan

24. Best TARDIS Team?

Doctor, Amy and Rory

25. Most underrated companion?

Graham, but that may just be cause I love Bradders

26. Most overrated companion?

Rose... I like her but idk, I think she gets more hype than she deserves.. don't @ me

27. Favourite companion’s family?

Rose’s mom

28. Who should have been a companion but wasn’t?

idk I cant think of anyone

29. Favourite (canon or non-canon) DW universe relationship?

Amy and Rory

30. Who did you not used to like, but really like now?

wasn't keen on Bill at first but by the end I really liked her, same with Rory

EPISODES

31. Favourite episode ever?

girl in the fireplace

32. Least favourite episode?

most of Chibnall’s episodes tbh sorry not sorry 

33. Which episodes do you skip?

the regeneration episodes

34. Best two-parter?

Human Nature - Family of Blood

35. Historical, present day or futuristic episodes?

I like them all in there own way but I think present is fave, then historical, then future

36. Episode that will always make you smile?

all of them

37. Episode that will always make you cry?

Rory and Amy’s last episode :’(

38. Best run of episodes?

ugh I cant answer this theres too many 

39. Best cliffhanger?

the end of Spyfall part one when the Master reveals who he is... I was SHOOK

40. Favourite Christmas special?

Voyage of the Damned

SERIES

41. Classic Who or New Who?

new who

42. Favourite series?

four or five

43. Least favourite series?

eleven, I just cant with the writing

44. Which series do you skip?

none

45. Favourite series opening?

eleventh hour

46. Favourite series finale?

Doomsday

47. Best series arc?

Bad Wolf

48. Thoughts on series 11/12?

I adore Jodie Whittaker and her doctor, and although I think 3 companions is too many I do love Yaz and Graham (Ryan is hit & miss). I just think theyve been massively let down by the stories/writing... they’ve tried to hard to tick certain boxes and completely missed what Doctor Who is about for a lot of people.. an escape from the real world into these outrageous unbelievable but lovable fun alien adventures 

49. How much of Classic Who have you seen?

not a lot

50. Who should have had another series?

NINE NINE NINE NINE NINE 

MONSTERS

51. Favourite monster/villain?

the master 

52. Most creative monster?

Weeping Angels, whoever came up with monsters that look like statues and only move when you're not looking at them is genius 

53. Monster(s) that scares you most?

Autons, Cybermen, the creepy dolls from Night Terrors, the ones from Waters of Mars, Weeping Angels

54. Monster you think is too easy to defeat?

idk

55. Least favourite monster/villain?

absorbaloff

56. Monster you want to return?

The Master, I really hope that isn't the last we see of Dhawan

57. In your opinion, what makes a monster good?

being genuinely scary, 

58. Daleks, Cybermen or Weeping Angels?

Weeping Angels

59. Best Dalek story?

Daleks in Manhatten

60. Best one time villain/monster?

my brain has gone blank I cant think of an answer right now 

ADDITIONAL MATERIAL

61. Torchwood or Sarah Jane Adventures?

SJA

62. Favourite Torchwood Team member?

I haven't watched it all so I couldn't say 

63. Which Torchwood death made you saddest?

again, not watched it all 

64. Do you rewatch COE or MD?

huh

65. Favourite SJA Team member?

Sarah Jane

66. Mr Smith or K-9?

K-9

67. Maria or Rani?

Rani

68. Do you read the comics/novels or listen to Big Finish?

Nope

69. If you do, your favourite additional stories?

n/a

70. Do you like DW analysis (video essays, fan theories, etc)?

yes

DESIGN/PRODUCTION

71. Favourite piece of alien tech?

the sonic, I love how it is so multipurpose except for when it comes to wood 

72. Favourite piece of Murray Gold music?

I am the Doctor - gets me pumped every time 

73. Favourite TARDIS design?

Ten’s Tardis 

74. Has the 2005 era CGI aged well?

actually yeah, I was rewatching the ‘are you my mummy’ episodes the other day and my God when the gas masks emerged from the faces... ooooooof I was like omg how 

75. Favourite Doctor outfit?

eleven or thirteen

76. Monster with the best design?

not really a design more of a costume.. I live Dhawan master’s costume. that shade of purple, oof he so stylish 

77. Best show runner?

idk

78. Best writer?

Gatiss

79. Best opening titles?

eleven’s titles where the Tardis is flying and being zapped is cool but thirteens music hits different 

80. Will DW age well/stay popular in the future?

I hope so, I feel like its lasted this long surely it can last forever.. if the writers don't fuck it up... 

IF YOU WERE IN THE SHOW

81. Time period you’d want to go with the Doctor?

whatever time means Id get to wear the most beautiful costumes

82. Planet/place you’d want to go with the Doctor?

Galifrey, pre-desctruction

83. Doctor you’d most like to travel with?

any of them, please and thank you

84. Companion you’d most like to travel with?

donna, sceso a good laugh but also I feel like she’d look after me 

85. Monster you’d like to defeat/fight?

The Master 

86. If you could go back on your own history (like Father’s Day), where would you go?

back to when I was a toddler, I wanna see what I was like 

87. If you could ask the Doctor anything, what would you ask?

theres too many to ask 

88. Historical figure you’d like to meet?

Shakespeare

89. How do you think you’d meet the Doctor?

id probably be rescued from doing something stupid and then the doc would be like you know what the bitch clearly needs supervision she's coming with me 

90. Would you travel forwards or backwards in time first?

backwards

IF YOU MADE THE SHOW

91. Historical event would you like to see in DW?

Hamilton

92. Issue you’d like to see addressed in DW?

idk 

93. Who would you completely erase from the DW universe?

Ruth

94. One unanswered DW question you’d love to know the answer to?

where is Clara now?

95. Actor/actress you’d like to see play the Doctor?

Phoebe Waller Bridge (or Lin Manuel Miranda)

96. Actor/actress you’d like to see play a companion?

Andrew Scott (yes I did just basically recast fleabag and hot priest)

97. Is DW “too political”?

series 11 got a bit like that 

98. Which characters fate would you changed?

Danny Pink

99. What about DW could be improved?

I think ive made my options about Chibnall pretty clear... 

100. If you could write an episode of DW, any ideas for what you’d do

bring back Jenny, the Doctor / Daughter adventures they would have. I’m actually writing a fic about it if you wanna read.... here

#doctor who #tag #doctor who tag #doctor who questions #survey

[liliah39]

Crazy Little Game of Love - Chapter 5

Word Count: 14.5 K (i told you it was long!!) 

Warnings: smut, angst, adorable-ness 

A/N- Hey y’all! I think this is the chapter I’ve been most excited for so far, so I’m having a great time writing it. Just a reminder! when writing is in Italics, it means it’s Y/N’s thoughts. Also, the start of this chapter takes a lot of inspiration from the song Hurricane from Hamilton by Lin Manuel Miranda, so any lyrics used all rights go to him. The beginning is Y/N’s Alexander during hurricane moment. If you’ve seen Hamilton/know the musical you’ll understand what I mean. Also, the opening may seem like it flows kinda odd, but that’s because it’s kinda supposed to be like a stream of consciousness. -C

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

20 Minutes After where we left off:

In the eye of the hurricane there is quiet. 

For just a moment. 

There are some moments, when a teenage girl needs her mum. 

This was one of those moments. 

Has my mum been the best? No. Far from it. She made me never want to return home. But your mum is your mum, no way around it. And it’s times like this I just want to say “Help me! I’m conflicted and don’t know how to deal with breaking my own heart and the heart of the guy I love, what do I do?”

As I lay here floating all I can think is that I want to run in the house and grab the phone and call my mum, cry about how much I miss her, and beg for her advice. 

I have Jer; I have my new mum. 

But I can’t even call her because the main reason for my conflict is because of Spain, if I tell her she’ll tell Freddie. 

My Freddie. 

My rock. My constant shoulder to cry on, and I can’t even tell him. I’ve never felt so alone. 

As a wave pushes me under for just a brief moment, my mind can’t stop racing, insecurities flooding back and forth like the waves that rush the shore. 

What if I’m not good enough?

What if I ruin all my friendships?

What if I go to Spain and die?

As you softly cried you thought about what had gotten you here. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

20 Minutes before hand (Where we left off)

“You’re my love, Y/N.”

One. 

You inhaled to speak. 

“I- I’m sorry Roger, I can’t handle this right now.” You spat out as you hopped off the rock and started toward the beach. Roger grabbed your wrist. 

“Where are you going?” 

“For a swim.” 

“You’re what?” He said, the fear immediately apparent in his voice. 

“I’m going for a swim, Roger. Need to clear my mind.” You said as monotone as possible.

He let out an annoyed laugh at your actions. “I profess my love to you, and you just walk away from me?” He said, raising his voice. 

“I can’t even believe you’d put me in that situation. You can’t just demand things from me, Roger! You expect me to know exactly what I want, -or no! Expect me to say exactly what you want to hear!” You yelled, tears flooding out of your eyes. 

“I just don’t want to bloody lose you, Y/N!” He yelled back. 

You ignored his statement. “I said I was going for a swim.” You said, looking at the ground as you tried to pull your wrist away from his grasp. 

“Please, Love, go for a walk, or a drive, or take a bath, or whatever you need. I won’t bother you with whatever you decide to do, just please don’t go for a swim. You know how I am.”

“You can’t hold me back forever, Roger.” You said coldly, a dual meaning present to you both in your statement. 

His shock from your words allowed you to pull your wrist free, as you quickly walked into the ocean and dove in, hearing Roger scream your name behind you. 

As you came up for air, you heard his screams. “Y/N! Are you okay?” 

“I’m fine Roger,” you said annoyed. “Let me fucking relax!” 

“Fine, I’m sitting right here, then.” He said plopping right on the shore line. “Remember; I’m sitting here because I care about you and worry about your well being! Apparently, it’s not reciprocated.”

You screamed in frustration. “I did not say that, Roger! Do not put words into my mouth. I don’t care what the hell you do; just don’t bother me while I relax!” 

“Fine!”

“Fine!”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

And so I lay here, regretting my mistakes as I let the ocean consume the weight of my body. 

“You still okay?” You heard. 

You stuck a thumbs up in the air, the salty water coming in drips off of your arm and plopping on your face and in the water around you.

And then, it came to you. You were staying an extra day for a reason; to enjoy your relationship for an extra day. There was no reason to be having an argument at this moment; you both knew what would happen once you got home, so why not enjoy the last moments you had left together?

You started to swim in with complete intention to stop this argument, but not let him off the hook completely right away. If this relationship was actually going to last longer than the next 24 hours, and there really was a part of you considering it, then Roger needed to learn how to respect you and the decisions you make, plain and simple. As you walked onto the shore, you immediately heard “So, what did y-”

“Don’t talk to me right now, Roger.” You coldly cut him off, grabbing your towel and putting it on top of the flat rock you were laying on earlier. About ten minutes after you laid in the sun, you heard a beach chair being set up snugly to the left of the rock. Through the side of your eye you saw the straggly blonde locks, immediately revealing that it was Roger. You expected to hear him say something… 

but it was silent. 

For a good twenty minutes the only sound was the seagulls and the rushing of the waves on the shore. And then, you heard a quiet voice, one similar to a hurt child after being put in a time out, 

“I’m sorry.”

Silence. 

“I shouldn’t have talked to you that way; shouldn’t have pressured you. You gotta understand, this is hard on me too, Love.” He laughed. “I mean, the girl I’ve been trying to get with for almost a year has sex with me five times in a night and then expects me to believe we’ll be nothing more than friends within a matter of days, and that we’ll be mere acquaintances that are countries apart within months? I’m genuinely sorry; I didn’t mean anything I said.” 

Silence. 

You could hear the sadness in his voice. You opened your eyes to see one of his hands resting on the rock while the other held the book he was reading. You reached for his hand as you sat up, earning a gasp from him as a smile explodes on his face as he turned to look at you. There were tears welled in the bottom of his eyes, which made you feel even worse for all the stress you had just put him through. 

“Rog,” You smiled. “We could never go back to being acquaintances after this. Romantic or not, we have something special.”

You saw one tear slide down his cheek. 

“Yeah.” He sadly chuckled. 

“I made a decision,”

“Okay,” he said, lump settling in his throat as he swallowed. 

“And that is to not make a decision.”

“What?”

“... yet.” You hesitantly said, patting the rock next to you, telling him to climb on. “While I was floating out there I realized that the reason we extended this trip was so we could spend more time together before having to make a decision. I love you, Roger, and if these are our last days being able to express it-”

“Don’t say that.”

“But it could be. So if they are, I don’t want to go through them making a decision. And besides, the longer we spend as a couple will have an effect on the decision I make. Yes, it also makes it harder, but nothing in life is easy, is it?” You said, pressing your forehead to his. You were both softly crying, your shoulders simultaneously moving up and down at the apparent ruined dream of your relationship. 

“Can I just ask you a question?” Roger softly said as his eyes flicked around the scene before you and then settled on yours. You nodded your head as he grabbed your hand. “Is this just a fling to you, and that’s why you’re saying we can’t continue a relationship? Because just for my own purposes, since I’ve admitted my feelings for you I need to know if you actually feel the same way.”

You thought this was a moment where actions would speak louder than words, so to prove to him his feelings were reciprocated, you pressed your lips to his, and felt him smile against it, putting his hand up to your cheek as he deepened the kiss a little more. After some time, you pulled away and said, “Of course I feel the same way Rog, my life is just going to be completely turned upside down in a couple months-”

“It’s really almost a year, Y/N.”

“What?”

“I realized it last night when it was like our second time? Maybe it was the third? I don’t know. Anyways, when I flipped you so you were laying on the bed you said ‘I wish I could leave in August of ‘73 instead of ‘72 so we could do this every night.’ Remember that?” You shook your head no. 

“I think I was in so much ecstasy, Rog, that I forgot most of our conversations after the bath.” You giggled. 

“Then that just means I’m as good in bed as I thought I was.” He smirked, leaving you shaking your head as you pressed a soft kiss to his cheek. “But yeah, I thought you were going next semester, but no, you leave in August. That’s ten months away, Love. This is the last I’ll speak of it until I physically drop you off at your dorm, but don’t deny yourself something you so badly want out of fear. Just something to think about.” You nodded your head. “It’s just about 4:00, do you want to go up and get ready for dinner? I was hoping we could go to that really ritzy restaurant, then maybe to the club after?” 

“Sounds perfect.” You smiled, leaning in to kiss him as he hopped off the rock and scooped you up in his arms which gave you that feeling again. 

Bliss. 

Do I actually want to let this go?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You put on your black Peter Pan collared dress, thinking that it’d be dressy enough, and started on your makeup. Just out of curiosity, you yelled through your door to Roger’s room. 

“Rog! What are you wearing?”

“A suit.” He yelled back. 

“A suit?!”

“Yeah, is that a problem?”

“Is it that dressy of a restaurant?”

“Yeah, Love. Five course meal, reservation only, live string quartet, chandeliers. You know, all that kind of stuff.”

“Okay.” You nervously laughed. 

You looked down at your dress. It certainly wasn’t dressy enough. You thought about what you had packed and panicked. You knew you hadn’t packed anything that dressy, but pulled your suitcase apart hoping you’d find something. With the contents of your bag on your bed, and no luck in finding a suitable dress to wear, tears welled in your eyes as you noticed something bulging out of the large, zippered pocket on the inside of the door to your small suitcase. You wiped away a tear as you unzipped the pocket to find a grocery bag tied shut with a large piece of clothing in it, and silver sparkly heels in the pocket under the bag. There was a note taped to the bag that read:

Hello Darling!  If you’re reading this it means my plan worked! Roger told me about the fancy restaurant he was planning on taking you to, and I knew you wouldn’t have packed accordingly, so I stole some of my mum’s heels (did you know you two were the same shoe size?!) and bought you this dress. Don’t worry, I bought it in your size. :) I know it’s not your style, but let’s face it. You wouldn’t have chosen the right style dress for this type of venue even if you knew about it, sorry to make you face the truth, Darling. Hopefully you’ll get to wear this though! And if you ended up not going there, don’t worry, you can wear it to our school’s gala in a couple months! Hope you’re having the time of your life!! Xoxo, Freddie Bulsara but really Farrokh soon to be Mercury.  (P.S. remember when I introduced myself like that?)

A huge smile spread across your face. 

My guardian angel. I’ll never know what I did to deserve him. 

You stepped into your new dress, a gorgeous, floor length, flowy, satin red dress. It had no beading, but an extremely high slit, and it’s thin straps crossed in the back. It was completely elegant, and actually fit you right! You’d have to remember to thank Freddie profusely when you got back home. You put on your dangly silver earrings as you finished your makeup, opting to go with a more glammed up look than you originally had planned, put on a red toned nude lipstick, and kept your hair down as you curled it into soft waves that rolled down your back. 

As you sprayed on your perfume you heard a knock at the door. “It’s been twenty five minutes Love, you almost ready?”

“Yup!” You replied. “You can come in, I’m just putting on the necklace you gave me.” You said as you leaned to look in the mirror of the vanity in your room to put on your necklace. 

(Start playing You Take My Breath Away by Queen from the piano entrance)

Roger’s breath was completely taken away when he first saw you, a huge smile on his face. He quietly walked over to you, standing behind you as he took the necklace from your hands. “Here, let me.” He smiled, as you pulled your hair over your shoulder. After he put the necklace on, he wrapped his arms around you looking at your two reflections in the mirror. “You’re so beautiful, Y/N.” He softly said in your ear. 

Bliss. 

“You ready Rog?” 

He nodded, grabbing your hand as you walked out the door. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

As you and Roger walked into the restaurant (a huge building that looked like a large Victorian mansion) with your arm hooked around his, your breath was taken away. There were three floors of seating for guests, all which were open in the center to overlook the ballroom in the center of the first floor. Each table seemed to be spread out enough that each dining party would have an extreme amount of privacy, and they were decorated with beautiful bouquets of roses and candles. On the high ceiling above the ballroom floor, there was a huge chandelier, and there were small ones all around the restaurant. There was a string quartet playing at the front of the dance floor as couples waltzed around it. On each end of the ballroom from the second floor balcony, the area in which you in Roger were standing and what you saw from walking through the entrance, there were huge, picturesque staircases that looked as if they were out of a fairy tale. You’d never seen such a beautiful place in your life. 

“Rog,” You whispered in his ear, “How do you have the money for this place?” You nervously said. 

“Don’t worry about it, a guest and I eat here for free. I’ll explain later.” He smiled, tapping your nose. 

“But how-“ You were cut off as a host appeared in front of you, napkin draped over his arm, hand outstretched to help you down the four stairs to leave the entry way as another worker took Roger’s overcoat, just leaving him in his suit coat. As Roger came down the steps to join you again, immediately hooking his arm with yours, the host said, 

“Good evening, Mr. Taylor. Would you like your usual table?” 

“That’d be perfect.” Roger smiled.

“Right this way.” The man smiled. You were completely in awe. Not only did this already seem like the last place you’d ever find Roger, but now he had his own table? You were shocked to say the least. 

You were led to a table on the left side of the second floor right next to the railing with a perfect view of the string quartet. It was set back around the curve of the balcony, so it was completely isolated, and right next to the opening of the castle-esque stairs. It was perfect. Roger pulled your chair out for you as you sat down, and once your menus were placed in front of you and you two were left alone, you snapped your head up at him, eyes immediately telling him you needed an explanation. You caught him laughing at your curiosity. 

“My great grandfather was the founder of this restaurant. As a result, all the Taylor’s get to eat here for free for all of eternity, plus one guest per Taylor. No joke; he literally wrote it in the expectations/rules for this restaurant when it was passed to the next owner.”

You nodded your head. The scene in front of you was so romantic, it was hard to believe it wasn’t all a dream. 

“Do you want to dance? They always leave twenty minutes before they come to ask which item of the night you’d be choosing for your entré to give everyone time to dance a little. When we come back there will be a bottle of wine, a salad, and tonight’s appetizer. Since it’s a 5 course meal, there isn’t much picking from the menu. Very fancy. But yeah, we’ve got time to dance. Although I must warn you, there’s no disco.” He laughed. 

“Of course I want to dance, Rog.” He got up and outstretched his hand to you as he escorted you to the stairs. You noticed a couple people staring, and assumed it was because Roger’s family was the royalty of the restaurant. Once you got to the dance floor, Roger brought you to the center, and  a new waltz started. Your right hand joined with Roger’s left as your other hand went on his shoulder and his other on your hip. 

The side with the slit, you noticed. 

You noticed more people staring. A couple of the other pairs who were previously on the dance floor paused to watch the two of you dance. You noticed some of the women whispering things in their husbands ears as their gazes focused on the two of you, their hands attempting to subtly point at you and Roger waltzing in the middle of the ballroom floor. 

“They’re all looking at you.” You blushed. 

“No, believe me. They’re all looking at you.” He smiled back. “I’ve gotta warn you love. I’m not a great dancer even though my parents always tried to teach me to ballroom dance when we’d come here when I was young.” 

“You’re doing just fine Rog, to be honest, I don’t really know what I’m doing either.” You laughed as you pointed your leg on the side the slit of your dress was on. The slit went all the way to the top of your hip, and Roger definitely noticed. His hand on your hip slipped a little lower. 

“No underwear?” He smirked. 

“Nope.”

“God, I love you even more each day.” He said, kissing your forehead and shaking his head in disbelief of the amazing girl he held in his arms. 

“Well you would have seen them if I wore them!” You playfully opposed. 

“Hey, I didn’t say to wear them, Baby. There’s never going to be a situation where I encourage you to wear underwear.” He said, making you laugh as you threw back your head in disbelief of how candid he was. You then put your focus at the waltz in front of you, gazing into Roger’s ocean blue eyes as he stared back at you with an eternal love in his eyes. Just the way he was looking at you made you feel more beautiful than you ever had in your entire life. In that moment, you felt so lucky to be Roger Taylor’s girlfriend, and would have done anything to keep it that way. 

Your dinner was absolutely wonderful, and quite honestly the best food you’d ever eaten. Dessert was filled with laughter and admiration as Roger fed you chocolate covered strawberries, which they usually don’t have at the restaurant, but Roger had called ahead of time to have some specially made after checking your favorite dessert with Freddie. It truly made the night your ideal fantasy of the perfect date. 

Roger consistently fed you strawberries from the large plate of forty in the middle of the two of you. The strawberries were made from every kind of chocolate imaginable, from plain milk chocolate to dark chocolate with sea salt and caramel drizzle. You’d never had something so good in your life. He occasionally took one for himself, or would eat one if you held it out to him, but was completely content with resting his chin on his hand as he watched you with admiration. 

“Why chocolate covered strawberries?” He asked as you licked the tip of the strawberry he held in front of your mouth before taking a large bite of it. In the candlelight, your large eyes sparkled with a light of false innocence. You knew exactly what you were doing with your movements, pleased that you could make him flustered with just a lick of a strawberry and the batting of your eyes.  

“What do you mean?” You said, broken from your trance. 

“Why are they your favorite?”

“How did yo-”

“Freddie.” He smiled. 

“Wow, Mr. Roger Taylor. I must say I’m impressed. You’ve really done everything to surprise me, make me happy, take me on lavish dates,” you said, reaching across the table to grab his hand. “Every girl dreams of a man like you. This has easily been the most romantic night of my life.”

“Your boyfriend loves you.” He gushed, a smile on his face from ear to ear. You leaned across the table to press a kiss to his lips. “But really, why chocolate covered strawberries? I’m curious.”

“Oh I don’t know, really, I don’t. Strawberries and chocolate alone are alright, but together it’s just like they were made for each other,” 

Pause.

“like us.” 

He was so happy by what you said, he couldn’t even speak. It was in this moment he knew you’d choose him once you got home. The connection between the two of you was too strong. 

“One more dance, Love?” 

You nodded. “Wait, can we take the rest of the strawberries home?”

He laughed. “You’re adorable.”

He walked over to you, reaching a hand out as he spun you, your dress slightly flying up and cascading around you. With a kiss on your cheek, he walked over to a server, asking for the remaining strawberries to be wrapped up, and coming back to you, leading you to the ballroom floor for the last time that night. 

After sharing one more dance, the two of you walked arm in arm to Roger’s car, giddy like school children as you pressed yourself closely into his body. You stopped, looking up into the sky at the crystal clear night above you, the stars glistening brighter than you ever remembered seeing before due to your close proximity to the ocean. You turned to face Roger arms wrapping around his neck as his laid on your waist. 

“Look how beautiful they are.” You said smiling, head angled toward the sky. “This all just seems too good to be real. I mean, I know it is, but like I said before, this doesn’t happen every day. This is the kind of date girls dream of.” You said, pressing your nose to his. 

“Well I’m only dreaming of one girl.” He said just loud enough for the two of you to hear as he caressed your cheek in his hand, slowly locking your lips together. Your eyes fluttered shut, as the kiss deepened, your lips moving perfectly in sync. The kiss remained slow, yet passionate. There was no lust behind the kiss to drive it to push faster speeds. The kiss was purely love. 

By the time you got back to the house it was about 9:30, and Roger scooped you up and carried you in his arms with plans to carry you all the way to your bedroom. “Roger!” You laughed with your arms around his neck. “You can put me down to unlock the front door.”

“No I can’t,” he smiled. 

“And why would that be?” You said as he finally got the door open and walked inside. 

“Have you seen yourself tonight?”

“Huh?”

“You look like a bloody princess, Y/N. You were honestly the most beautiful girl there. You see how jealous the other women were? Much dressier than anyone else was. Can’t let my princesses feet touch the ground.” He smiled, pressing his nose to yours as his words of affection made you giggle. 

Once you arrived at your room, he sat in the middle of your bed still cradling you in his lap, your large dress fanned out over your bed with your leg out of the slit. With one arm under your head, Roger lovingly looked down at you, his other hand lovingly stroking the side of your face and fanning your hair out around your head. You closed your eyes, completely relaxed by his gentle touches. A couple minutes later, you sighed as you turned your head into his lap a little more.

“Don’t fall asleep on me, Love.” Roger laughed. 

“I’m not, I’m not. Just relaxed.”  You smiled, opening your eyes to return the love he gazed at you with. You turned your head to place a kiss to the inside of his palm, and you noticed him blush as you did so. 

“You don’t wear red often,” he said. 

You laughed at his awkward statement. “Yeah, I guess I don’t?”

“You should. Very sexy color on you, my Love.” 

You laughed at his once again very candid statement, reaching one hand up to caress his cheek. “Alright, Rog. I’ll take that into consideration.” 

“Say, where’d you get this dress from anyway? To be honest, and don’t get me wrong, I love the dress on you almost as much as I loved your sheer jumpsuit, but it doesn’t seem quite your style.”

“Well, my angel Freddie struck once again. You see, you forgot to tell me how dressy the restaurant was, and -”

“Sorry about that, by the way.”

“No don’t be! I’m honestly happy with the way the situation played out, since I never would have chosen this dress on my own. Anyways, I was planning on wearing a casual dress, but once you told me you were wearing a suit I started panicking and threw everything out of my bag looking for something suitable to wear, and noticed the inside pocket of my bag was bulging. I didn’t remember putting anything in it, so I opened it out of curiosity finding a note from Freddie saying he knew I didn’t know how fancy the restaurant was, and even if I did, he knew I wouldn’t have packed something dressy enough, so he bought me this dress and borrowed mum’s shoes, secretly packing them for me in hopes I’d find them. I’ll have to thank him when I get back.”

“Wow. Well, make sure you thank him for me too.”

After both laughing at his joke for a small bit, there was a patch of silence. 

“I really do love you, Rog.” 

“I love you too, Y/N.” He smiled. Some part of him told him you’d choose to stay in the relationship. He wasn’t sure why, but something just seemed like you would. “I’m not ready to call it a night, are you?”

“What do you mean?” 

“We’ve still gotta go to the club, you know, go disco? I promised you we would!” 

“Wait, really?!” You said, getting a newfound adrenaline rush from your excitement, wrapping your arms around his neck, sitting up and turning your whole body to look at him. 

“Really.” 

“Then we’ve gotta get changed!” You said, springing up and digging through your bag. Roger laughed at your antics as you frolicked around the room. “What are you waiting for?! Go get changed, Roger!”

“Okay, okay!” He said, raising his arms up in defense. 

As soon as he was in his room, you quickly slipped out of your dress, and put on your new rose gold pantsuit. It was completely sequined, and had a halter top style neckline that plunged just above your belly button. You decided to stay not wearing a bra, and put on your white pumps. Looking in the mirror, you applied a hot pink lipstick and fluffed out your hair, threw your newly gifted fur coat over your shoulder and stepped out into the hall. 

“What color are you wearing?” You heard Roger yell toward the bathroom that united your bedrooms as he assumed you were still getting ready. 

 Deciding to be a little devious, you opened his bedroom door and stepped in. “Rose gold.” You smirked. 

His head snapped up instantly.  He was in his white suit pants, matching coat on the bed as he stood at the closet shirtless. “Wow, so different to the girl I was with three minutes ago.” He chuckled. “You must be excited, that was a very fast outfit change, Love.” 

You nodded as you walked up to him, pressing your body flush against his as you pressed your hands to his chest, cherishing how beautiful he was. “Different how?” You teased. 

“Curvier, sparklier, sexier. Much more cleavage. I could keep going.” he smirked.

“Cleavage, huh?” You said, resting your hand on top of his as he leaned against the trim of the closet. 

“Mmmm, cleavage. You know I’m much more of a tits guy the ass, though I do have to say your ass looks amazing, maybe even just as good.” He winked. 

“Well tell me, do they feel better?” You said, pulling his hand away from the wall and slyly under the jumpsuit to your left breast. He let out a breath of satisfaction, immediately starting to massage it as he easily pulled it out of your revealing top. 

“Ah, gotta be careful dancing tonight, Love, seems like you could easily slip out of your top.” He smirked. 

“And would you even care?”

“Not as long as other people didn’t watch. Want ‘ya all to myself.” He smiled, bending to attach his lips to your nipple as he roughly applied both of his hands to your ass, immediately kneading both sides in his hands. 

You let out a moan of satisfaction, arms draped around his neck. As he switched to the opposite breast you noticed a light pink dress shirt in his closet that you started to put on him as he continued his work. 

“You know, usually people undress their boyfriends in situations like this, not put on clothes.” 

“I’m trying to get to disco!” You jokingly protested as you put the shirt on him, Roger aggravated as he couldn’t continue his suckling while you did so. 

Once you finished with his shirt he said, “By the way, your tits are hanging out.” He joked, stopping your hand as you reached up to conceal yourself. “I wanna do it.” He playfully whined as you threw your hands up in resignation. He continued massaging both of your breasts as he put them each underneath their sequined layer of fabric. He put on his coat and shoes, also grabbing his fur coat matching to yours and draped it over his arm as he grabbed your hand to go to the club as the two of you walked out of the house toward the car. 

“And by the way, my little experiment back in the bedroom once again proved your breasts feel much better than your ass.” He joked, squeezing your breast as he opened the door for you. 

Each of his actions did things to you. 

Things you didn’t know if you could ignore once returning to a friendship back in London. 

On the car ride to the club, Roger constantly kept his hand on your inner thigh, rubbing and squeezing, every once in a while, rubbing your core to which you’d let out a breath of air and a smile from the pleasure his motions brought you. 

“You know,” you started, “ I don’t even know how you’re driving right now. I’m not even trying to focus on anything and yet I can’t focus on anything except your touches.”

“Sorry Love, can’t fucking help it when you dress like that, tease me all day. Show me how amazing only you have ever made me feel five times in a night?” He grunted. 

“Have I really affected you that much today?”

 “So are you saying we can pull over?” He said, hoping you’d relieve him of the throbbing inside his pants. You did it much better than anyone else ever had the night before.

“No! It’s already 10:00, Rog, I wanna get there before everyone else leaves.” He let out a puff of air in annoyance. “You know, you’re much more sexual after sundown.” He laughed at your accusation. 

“Touché.”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When you arrived at the club, the music was loud and you could hear all the people inside, evident by the amount of cars parked out front. You walked inside hand in hand in your fur coats, paying the bouncer to put them in the coat check as you absorbed the night life in front of you, quickly pulling Roger to the dance floor before he could even get a drink. As you arrived, Play That Funky Music by Wild Cherry started, and the crowd went wild. You started dancing just facing him, hands held together as the two of you jumped back and forth with the fast beat, and just before the chorus at the lyric “Somebody turned around,” you turned yourself around, ducking under one of his arms so they were tightly wrapped around you as they pushed you into him. In doing so you immediately slowed the rhythm down, only grinding your hips  back into him at the start of each measure throughout the entire chorus. You felt his arms squeeze you tighter into him as he bucked his hips with the slower rhythm to the song, matching your movements. You heard him softly and lowly moaning into your ear, only audible to you because of the volume of the club. As the chorus ended with the line that starts “Lay down and boogie”  you slid out of his arms, forcing him to watch you as you swayed your hips side to side as you slowly dropped with the music, your hands gliding up your sides as you purposely pursed the fabric so he could see clearly down your jumpsuit, hearing him let out a quiet grunt as you hit the word “die” with the end of your drop to the floor, hands now joined as you bent at your waist as you stood, upper body slowly coming up as your hands traced along your legs giving him a clear view of your toned, dancers body, bending suggestively in front of him, clear to him what you were implying. Once you were fully stood up, he grabbed your arm, whipping you around to face him as he pulled you off the dance floor, and toward the back of the club, entering a bathroom and quickly locking the door behind him. Once the closed door muffled the sound of the partying crowd you said, 

“What was that for?” 

“God,” He rushed out, “With you dancing like that I couldn’t make it through one fucking song. You know exactly what you’re doing. You’re killing me. Making me incredibly hard only in the way you do, and let me remind you in public, Y/N. I can’t handle it anymore, my hearts fucking racing, I feel like I’m going to explode. I need you right fucking now, Y/N.” 

“Aww, Roggie,” you teased. “I thought you’d never ask.” You finished as he pulled you flush to his body. 

“Stop fucking teasing me, which you have been for the last hour, and please just let me fuck you.” He growled, his voice animalistic. 

“By all means, go right ahead.” You smirked.

You let him unzip the back of your jumpsuit, shrugging it off your shoulders as it immediately dropped to the floor leaving you in a lacy, black, thong. 

“Too perfect.” He mumbled as he pressed a kiss to your lips and picked you up to sit you on the edge of the sink counter top. He attached his lips to your neck, leaving you a mess as you ran your fingers through his hair, thankful for the loud music that would drown out your sounds of ecstasy to passerby’s. Roger pressed a finger to your clit, massaging as you became a mess beneath his touches. “I’m sorry I’m moving so fast, Baby,” he said, breathless, “I’m just gonna stretch you out a little before, you know. I wouldn’t last if we had a lot of foreplay right now. You have no idea what you do to me.” He shyly admitted. 

“That’s fine,” you smiled, cupping his cheeks in your hands as you pressed a kiss to his lips, completely enamored with the man in front of you who turned every small pain in your body to bliss, and your darkest thoughts to dreams of sunshine. 

He kept his lips attached to yours, massaging one breast in one hand as he pushed your panties to the side, rubbing a finger up and down your core before fastly inserting two. Your breath hitched from the unexpected action, a moan of pain and pleasure paralyzing you as you leaned back into the wall behind you. Your breathing quickened, rubbing Roger’s back as you squeezed your eyes shut. He started scissoring with his already fast speed, not only trying to get you to the same level of arousal he was at, but also trying to prepare you for his member. He never remembered being so hard in his life. 

“I’ve gotta add another.” He breathlessly muttered, you nodding against his lips. As he inserted his other finger, you tilted your head back, in that moment oblivious to every other thing in the world except for you and Roger. In your ears, the music became silent, and you didn’t even notice a knock on the door. In that moment you and Roger were the only two people that mattered. 

“You ready?” he asked, as you nodded feverishly. He pulled down his pants, his aching member suffering to spring lose. He looked at the space around you, unsure of how you two would manage this. You read his eyes, hopping from the counter and bending yourself over it. “You sure this is how you wanna do this, Love?”

“Please,” You begged, watching in the mirror as he grabbed your hips, inserting himself deep into your core. 

You had never let out a louder moan in your life. It was honestly more of a scream of immense pleasure from how deep he was inside you, how much larger he was than the night before, how fast he was pounding into you, and the fact that you could watch it all happen in the mirror in front of you. It was obvious you both weren’t going to last long. You hadn’t tried this position the night before, and were feeling things you hadn’t even known you could feel. The look on Roger’s face said the same thing, and you couldn’t help but agree with what he’d said on the beach earlier. 

Made for each other. 

 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After your sweaty bodies became one and you fixed your hair and makeup so it wasn’t completely apparent what just went on in the bathroom, you and Roger exited as you picked at your fingernails and joined the crowd of other young people on the dance floor. All your favorites like ABBA and Chic came on, making the night perfect. It was apparent how much better of a dancer you were than Roger, and how comfortable you were with the disco style. Roger loved watching you dance; it reminded him of the first time he saw you. 

“Say, Baby, make sure you learn how to do some Latin dancing while you’re in Spain.” He joked. 

“Why?” You said as you danced to Shake Your Groove Thing with him. 

“You’re an amazing dancer. Definitely have the hips and rhythm for it. Salsa, Cha Cha, Rumba, I don’t care. Whatever you can learn, learn it.” He said his instructions with such conviction it made you laugh. Just then a voice came over the speakers. 

“Alright folks, grab your partners, because we’re slowing things down all the way back to the ‘50’s. This slow dance is for all you couples out there.” 

The song Put Your Head on My Shoulder came on as you draped your arms around his neck and your head on his shoulder as his arms pulled you close to his body. He softly sang the words to you as you swayed back and forth. 

“Put your head on my shoulder

Whisper in my ear, baby

Words I want to hear

Tell me, tell me that you love me too”

As the song ended you pulled your head up to look at him. 

“I think that’s our song, Love.” He smiled, pressing his nose to yours. 

Emotional at the situation before you, you could only nod your head as you pressed your lips to his. 

Once you arrived home that night, you were both extremely exhausted from the full day you had, and retired to bed in Roger’s room almost immediately. You wore one of his shirts to bed as you climbed into his arms under the covers laying on your side as he spooned you, nuzzling his face in your neck every once in a while. 

“So tomorrow.” He said awkwardly in the pitch black. 

“Yeah.” 

“Yeah.”

“Do you…” he was hesitant to ask his question. 

“No, I don’t know yet. I’m just so thankful for this time we had together and for the fact that you’re in my life now.  I’m so happy for where we are right now, and please don’t ever forget how much I love you, Roger Taylor. I know this has only been a short, fleeting moment of a relationship without knowing it’s outcome, but remember love you with all my heart” 

“I love you more, Baby. So much more. And don’t try to prove you love me more, because you’ll  never able to. I’ll always love you more, and that’s the way it should be.” He said, pressing a kiss to the back of your head as the two of you drifted off to sleep with plans to leave around four the next day. 

You awoke to the smell of bacon, cold from Roger’s absence. You got up, walking down the hallway to find him cooking for you in the kitchen once again. He was so focused, he didn’t hear you come behind him and jumped when you wrapped your arms around him, burying your face into his shirtless back. 

“Hi, Baby.” He smiled. 

“Hi.” You managed to get out, as your eyes filled with tears. 

“What’s wrong?” He said, flipping around to see you looking up, trying to get rid of your tears. 

Your lips pressed into a tight line. A couple tears slipped down your cheeks. “It’s just- today,-“ You were unable to form words. You moved your hands as you spoke to try to get your point across. 

“I know, I don’t want it to end either.” He said, trying not to cry, as he came to you and engulfed you in a huge hug, you pressing your face into his chest. “Do you, well, do you know?”

“No” you whispered through your sobs, shaking your head. He stroked your hair for comfort. 

“Shh, Love, please don’t cry.” He said, rocking back and forth. He then picked you up and sat you on the edge of the counter, walking in between your legs, picking your chin up to look at him. He wiped some of your tears away. “Whatever you decide will be the right decision. I promise you whatever you do, I'm okay with. I might want something else, but in the end I’ll know you were probably right.” He joked, making you laugh through your tears. “We still got all day. We don’t have to leave until later, so I wanna relax before we leave so I’m not too tired driving home, but we have pretty much all day, Y/N. And it’s not like this is the last time you’ll see me. Even if we… well, you know. You’ll still see me all the time.” He had to be strong for you. 

“I know.”

“Please don’t cry. I hate to see you so sad.”

“It’s not your fault, I brought all this on myself. Maybe if I wasn’t so skeptical of everything-“

“Hey, you’re just being logical and I’m so proud of you for that. Let’s not talk about it until we get back.” 

“Until you drop me off.” 

“Okay, until I drop you off. Whatever happens, I love you.” 

“I love you too.” He pressed his lips to yours, still wiping away your tears. You couldn’t help but cry at the situation. You knew what you’d have to do, but just couldn’t deal with it yet. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tuesday, the day after they got home. 

You and Roger arrived home late from the beach the night before, so you just stayed overnight with him in his room at his and Brian’s shared apartment. Besides, it’d be weird not having him with you once you returned back to the dorm. Roger got up after kissing your nose and making you smile to start breakfast (the now usual routine for you two) and you heard a bang in the kitchen. “Fuck!” “Rog? What’s wrong, Love?” “I bloody missed rehearsal yesterday; didn’t even think of it. I just saw it on mine and Bri’s calendar. There’s a rehearsal now, started a half hour ago. Brian must’ve left already. They’re gonna fucking kill me.” He said, running past you to get changed in his room. “You’re coming with me, c’mon, Love get changed.” “Roger, I don't have any of my normal clothes with me. I- I can’t go out like th-” “Go out like what?” He came up to you and placed his hands on your shoulders. “Looking absolutely gorgeous? It’s just the boys. You’ll be fine.” “Okay,” you tentatively said, and began looking through your suitcase. 

“Maybe you could wear that sheer pantsuit you wore a couple days ago?” Roger smirked. “Oh, fuck off.” ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The two of you rushed into the rehearsal hand in hand in your matching coats. It was much colder back in London. You opted to wear your collared Peter Pan dress. “Well there’s our drummer.” Brian huffed. “Brian, I’m sorry, really.” “No call? No attempt to change the schedule?” “I’m sorry, we were busy. I forgot.” “You forgot? You forgot about your band and you both forgot about your roommates and your best friends?” Brian pressed. “Alright, now that he’s here can we just fucking play?” John asked , throwing his hands in the air. He kept staring at you. At your necklace. Freddie pulled you to the side. “So? You two didn't come back the same as when you left. Something happened, didn’t it? Something good.” “Something more than good,” you whispered back. “But yeah. Something happened alright.” “You’ll tell me?” he said,  hopeful, just like a little kid. “Later” You winked, and went to sit and watch the band play. 

“Oh, and I like your necklace.” Freddie smiled. After they finished practicing, Freddie, Brian, and Roger were over by the piano discussing songwriting, and John came up to you, yet turning his face away from you. You saw his shoulders shake. “Deaky, what's wrong?” you said springing up to him. “Lovely,” he whispered, shaking his head as tears fell from his eyes. “Y/n,” he closed his eyes shut quickly as he thought about the pain surrounding what he was about to say. He motioned to the blonde in the corner as he quietly sobbed, “D-do you love him? Are you in love with him?”

You didn’t know what to say. 

Of course you loved Roger. Said it multiple times over the last four days. But could John really handle to hear that right now? You looked over to Roger as he laughed with his friends and patted Brian on the back. You hadn’t made a decision yet. You and Roger hadn’t talked; he hadn’t dropped you off at home yet. 

“I don’t know.”

“You don’t know? You don’t know if you’re in love with someone? Unbelievable.” He said, shaking his head. 

Suddenly both of your attentions were drawn to the conversation at the piano. 

“Yes Roger! Absolutely brilliant idea! Pulls the whole song together. I missed you terribly yesterday.” Freddie said, pulling Roger in for a hug. Then he loudly gasped.

He noticed Roger’s necklace. 

Remembered yours as he looked between the two of you. 

You and Roger saw the realization come across his face, the smile on Roger’s fading. Then Freddie pulled Roger closer again, smelling his neck, his shirt, then when he smelled his hair, an even bigger light bulb went off. 

An even louder gasp. 

“You had sex!” Freddie exclaimed. 

“Freddie,” Roger said lowly, warning him to stop talking. Freddie ignored him and ran over to you, looking at your fingernails, picked down to the cuticle he noticed. You always did that after being with someone. It was a nervous tick, per-say. He smelled your hair too. 

“So did you!” He exclaimed. Brian looked at him, eyes wide in disbelief that he hadn’t put two and two together if his suspicions were right. 

He prayed they weren’t. 

Roger came to stand between you and Freddie, an act of protection. 

Then an even louder gasp came out as it hit him. 

“Oh my god, you two had sex?!”

Your look down seemed to confirm it. 

“I can’t believe you.” Your voice tremored as you looked up at Freddie. “When are you going to learn to just mind your own business?” 

Freddie realized what he just did, saw the hurt in your eyes. You and Roger weren’t actually together yet. 

“I’m sorry, I can’t handle this right now.” John said, head down as he wiped away another tear and stormed out of the building. 

“John, wait!” You screamed after him, running to the door and flinging it open. “It’s not like that!” You screamed, but he was nowhere in sight.

“It’s not like that, huh?” You heard Roger say behind you. You turned to see him with a look of disbelief on his face, his eyes red. 

“Rog, I didn’t mean it like that I just-“ 

Brian walked up to the two of you, shaking his head. “I can’t believe you, Roger. You knew how I felt and yet you- And you know how I felt about the trip, and what I asked you. What I asked you not to do?” he shook his head again, his lips pursing. “Wow, I’ve got some best friend.” 

“I’m gonna go sit in the car.” You said.

“Y/N wait!” Roger screamed after you. 

You still hadn’t made a decision. 

“Brian, please let me explain, but just not here, not now. John ran off, now Y/N’s all upset. Should probably go make sure she’s okay.” Roger said, the look of betrayal still prevalent on Brian’s face. 

“Just let her be Rog,” Freddie started. “She’ll be fine. She’s just going through an identity crisis.”

“You,” Roger started, waving his finger at Freddie. “How dare you just expose her like that in front of everyone? She’s supposed to be your best friend. How could you do that to her?”

“Well I guess I wasn’t thinking.” Freddie admitted. 

“That’s exactly right, mate. You weren’t thinking. Now look what you’ve done. And she’s going through a hell of a lot more than an identity crisis.”

“It all goes back to the fact she’s ashamed she left her family. Doesn’t know who she is anymore.”

“No, that’s not it. You don’t know.”

“Well of course I know, she’s my best friend, and-” Roger cut him off to make his point clearer. 

“Freddie. You. Don’t. Know.” Freddie stood there awestruck. “I- I gotta go get her. Make sure she’s okay. I’m sorry Brian, I truly am. I promise it’ll all be okay later.” He said before grabbing both of your coats and quickly walking out to the car where he found you hugging your knees in the front seat as you cried. 

“Cold?” He asked, opening the door as he tried to lighten the mood. 

“Yeah,” You whined, standing up and burying your face into his chest as you softly wept and he put your fur coat on you. “Can I go home now?” 

He let out a big breath of air. “ ‘Course. You know what your decision is going to be?”

You nodded your head as you cried. 

“Alright then. Still need to stop by my apartment to get all your things.”

With that, you got into the car, holding hands the whole way. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

As Brian drove Freddie home, he asked him, “How did you know, Fred?”

“Huh?” He said, snapping back to reality from his world of ogres and fairies. 

“How’d you know… her and Roger I mean.”

“Oh, well-um” he shifted uncomfortably in his seat. “There were a couple things that went into it. First of all, I realized a couple years ago that you can pick up a different smell on people you are around all the time a day or so after the have sex. It’s kind of musky, and you only smell it in their hair. They also had matching necklaces and matching coats, and Roger was acting extremely protective toward her. It’s obvious he’s in love with her but she doesn’t know how she feels.” That gave Brian hope. “And lastly, the thing that really gave it away was Y/N’s fingernails.” 

“I’m sorry, what?” Brian said, completely confused. 

“Y/N has this weird thing that right after she has sex with someone she picks her fingernails down to the cuticle to the point they almost bleed. Sounds quite painful if you ask me, Darling. I never understood it; must be some type of nervous tick. But it’s always a dead giveaway if she hooked up with someone or not.” 

“Oh. So it’s definite then.”

“Well, yeah. I mean she definitely had sex on their trip, Roger probably did, and since they were together the whole time, extended it without telling a single soul, and come back with matching coats and necklaces I’d say it just makes the most sense.”

“Right.” Brian said defeated. “So now three of us are in love with her in some kind of way?”

“You’re in love with her?”

“I guess so. I’m so crazy about her, Fred. I don’t know if I can say “in love” since we’re not together yet, but I really thought there was hope for us after the pumpkin patch. But then Rog expressed he liked her too, and I was too scared to tell him I wanted her, so instead I just said I kinda liked her too and until she decided between us, not to do anything sexual on the trip. Guy code, you know? And I guess I was naive in thinking she didn’t think of Deaky that way, but then with the way she reacted when he ran out, I think she might like him too. I’ve got no shot. Please don’t tell her how I feel, though. Don’t tell Rog either. I gotta find a way to calm my emotions and deal with him tonight.” 

“In all honesty Brian, I really don’t think she’s with Roger. She said she needed time, seemed she had reservations. There’s still hope. I’m rooting for you, Brian. I know you won’t hurt my girl.”

“Thanks, Fred. Let’s hope.” The pair smiled at each other. “Wait, you call her “your girl”,-“

“Oh no, I promise we’re not like that.”

“I know. Just listen. You call her “your girl” yet you call her out like that and make her feel like shit today? I know I called her and Roger out for being bloody awful best friends, but how does exposing her intimacy in front of everyone make you any better?”

Freddie sighed. “I wasn’t thinking. I truly wasn’t. I feel awful, I hope I didn’t lose her forever. It’s just, at home, we joke about that kind of stuff. Bluntly call each other out. We’re really brutally honest with each other at all times, or so I thought we were until Rog said there’s something I don’t know, and now I’m all insecure and hoping I didn’t lose her. I don’t know what I’d do if I lost her.” Tears came to his eyes. 

“Hey, Fred. You won’t lose her.  She talks so great of you. You’re the only person she really relies on in her entire life, she told me so herself. Tell her exactly what you just said. It’ll all be fine. And whatever is bothering her, she’ll tell you. You just gotta talk to her.” He said, pulling in front of the dorm. 

“I know you’re nervous to express your feelings, darling, but you need to talk to her too.” Freddie said, hugging Brian and opening the door to the car. “Thanks for the ride,” he said getting out of the car. “ and good luck with Rog tonight. Call me later or tomorrow and let me know how it all plays out.” Freddie winked as his friend threw him a soft smile and he went inside. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Your last moments spent with Roger before definitively having to make a decision were mostly left in silence. When you arrived at the apartment, you went inside and put all your things in your bag, since it’s contents were mostly strewn across Roger’s room from trying to find something to wear that morning. Once finished, you stood by the door waiting for Roger to finish his search for whatever he was looking for in the kitchen cabinets. After a couple minutes, he approached you with a soft smile, taking your bag from your grasp and intertwining his hand with yours as he silently lead you back to the car. 

On the way to your dorm, hands still intertwined he broke the silence. “Are you mad at him?”

“Hm?”

“Freddie?”

“Oh. No, I don’t think it’d do any good for me to be mad at him, I live with him in one room for Christ’s sake.”

“How can you be so forgiving?”

“Well, I hope he’d be that way for me. I’ve gotta break the whole Spain thing to him soon. It’ll be better if we’re both not mad at each other.”

“I told you Freddie isn’t gonna be mad about that, Baby.”

“I don’t know.” You muttered. 

“Well anyway, I’m gonna have a mouthful to hear when I get back home.” He said, changing the subject. 

“Brian’s really that mad?”

“Well, he um, yeah. Think he likes you too. He was pretty odd about me taking you on the trip, and then Freddie,”

“I see,” you said, understanding. As if this wasn’t already hard, Brian liked you too. Great. 

Roger turned onto your street. “But I can’t let him get my girl, now can I?”

“I’m not your girl, Roger.” You said under your breath as you pulled your hand away from him, the actions unfolding in the car making you both completely oblivious to Brian driving opposite you. Roger quickly diverted his eyes from the road to look at you in shock as he turned into the driveway of your dorm, once again pulling up to the front of the building and putting his car in park. 

“Hey,” he gave you a sad smile. “At least I can say I tried.” He got out of the car and opened the door for you as you immediately got out and jumped into his arms, tears welling in your eyes. 

“I’m so sorry, Roger.”

“It’s okay Ba-Love.” He corrected himself. It was shocking how quickly a nickname became custom, even if it was just adopted a couple days ago. He pushed the door shut just as Freddie reached the door to your shared dorm, confused as to who was out front. He receded back, walking into the common room and seeing the two of you on the sidewalk as he opened the window to observe.  

You continued to weep. “I understand, Y/N. I don’t like it, but I understand.” He tried comforting you. 

“But I know how you feel about me, and I just feel awful.” You cried. A tear slipped down his cheek. 

“I know.” He whispered. He kissed your head as he broke your hug, grabbing your bags from the back seat, and setting them on the ground beside you. 

“Thank you, for this weekend I mean. I’ve never felt like someone was so in love with me as you made me feel these last couple days. It was nice.” You smiled, grabbing his hand as he stood across from you. 

“That love hasn’t just gone away, Y/N. Even right here as you’re dumping me, I’m still crazy about you.” He laughed. 

“But Roger-”

“I know, I know. You don’t have to tell me. I know nothing I’m saying is going to change your mind. I just wanted to make sure you know how I feel while I still have the time.” 

You laughed as you cried out more tears. You’d experienced heartbreak before, heartbreak from relationships that had lasted eight months to two years, yet none of them had ever hurt this bad. The two of you weren’t crying because it was the end and your attraction had died as it had with your previous boyfriends, you were crying because it was the beginning. The hope for the two of you and your beautiful relationship seemed shattered. 

“I love you Roger.” You said, pressing your lips to his for the last time. It was a wet and salty kiss from each of your tears combining as they streamed down your faces. 

As you pulled away, he said, “I know this is the end for now, but it doesn’t have to be, Baby. If you change your mind, you know where to find me,” he smiled as he started back toward the car.

“Thanks, Rog.” You didn’t know what else to say. His absence made you hold your stomach as you cried even harder. 

“Please don’t cry.” He said, running back to you and wrapping his arms around you. It seemed like the string that was wrapped around the two of you wouldn’t let you part. You wrapped your arms around his neck, as you felt his shoulders shake. 

“But you’re crying!” You laughed. 

“Well ‘course I’m crying,” he said sarcastically, “my heart is being broken by the love of my life.”

“Oh, please.” You responded, a joking nature coming between the two of you. 

“I almost forgot,” he smiled, reaching into his pocket. He placed a car key in your hands. 

“Roger-” you gasped. 

“Told you I was giving you my car.”

“I can’t accept this.” 

“You’ve gotta.” he smiled. “Who’s gonna drive it when I buy my new one?” He silently mouthed ”you” as he pointed at you, making you laugh. “I just need this one until I buy my new one; should only be a couple weeks or so, but you can take the car whenever you need it, just give me a call.” 

You were speechless. He embraced you in his arms one last time; you both knew this was the end. 

“W- why, why are you so nice to me?” You said softly. Neither of you wanted to let go. 

He lightly chuckled. “It isn’t obvious by now?”

You looked up at him with your chin on his chest awaiting his answer. 

“I’m madly in love with you, Baby. Not a second has gone by this whole weekend that I don’t love you more and more. Believe me, it’s been short, but it’s real. Strongest I’ve ever felt for someone. On our trip, I realized that when you’re in love with someone, their return of affection doesn’t matter. It’s nice, but not really what you want. All I want is to make your life easier; to make you happy. As long as I do that, then I’m happy too.”

You let out a sob as you held him tighter, not sure if you were doing the right thing by letting him go. 

“I’m gonna go now, Y/N. I- I think I need some time alone.” He stuttered. 

You nodded understandingly, and as his went to pull away, a little chain around both of your necks was keeping you stuck together. Your necklaces had found each other once again, forming their heart as they strung the two of you together for one last fleeting moment. You both silently laughed as you reached your hand up to part your necklaces, and he walked with his head down to the drivers side of the car. “I really thought she’d say yes.” He thought. 

Opening the door, he said, “I love you, Y/N Y/M/N Y/L/N. Always will, Baby.” With that, he got in and drove away, wiping the tears out of his eyes as he planned to drive to a bar and think for a while. 

You watched him as he drove away, your sobs becoming louder as you realized what you’d done. The heartache was unbearable. You sat on your bag, unable to walk inside, and buried your face in your knees. 

A couple minutes later, you felt a pair of arms wrap around you from behind, rocking you back and forth to comfort you. “It’s alright, Darling. I’m here. I’ll always be here.” 

My Angel, Freddie.

You thought, wrapping your arms around him. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Once Freddie had gotten you inside, he held you in his lap on the edge of your bed as the room seemed to dim around you. He assured you everything would be okay and whispered words of comfort until you finally stopped crying. He continued running his fingers through your hair in the ear piercing silence, finally blurting out,

“Are you mad at me?”

“No Freddie, I’m not mad.” You said nonchalantly as you sat up next to him. 

“Even after all I said?”

“Yeah, even after all you said.” You laughed. “I know you didn’t mean it.” 

He smiled; it looked like a thousand pounds were lifted off his back. “Yeah, I didn’t mean it.” he giggled back. “You looked so mad, though.”

You’d never seen Freddie act so shy and depressed. He was acting quiet; for him that was never a good sign. You could tell he knew he was wrong. “I was mad at your impulsiveness. I’m fine joking around if it’s just us, and like I said I know you didn’t mean it. Knowing you, it probably just came out, but in front of the guys is what really got me upset. Mainly John’s reaction is what made me kind of mad.”

“I’m sorry.” He candidly admitted. 

“I know you are.” You smiled, giving him a hug. “I think I’m gonna go to John’s later tonight. Him and I need to hang out more anyways.” You smiled. 

“In your new car?”

“You know about that?” You said astonished.

“Oh of course I do, Darling. Watched the whole thing in the window.”

You laughed. “I’d bust on you, but I was planning on telling you what happened anyways so I guess your incessant nosy-ness saved me some breath.” 

“Still have to explain what lead up to that, I’m majorly confused about the weekend.”

“I will, I promise.”

After going into detail about what you and Roger did each day and how your romance bloomed over the trip leading all the way up to your departure just minutes before, it was silent. Freddie had just listened throughout the entire thing, and you could tell after finishing your story he was stuck thinking about something. Nothing was said for a while. 

“You know, you’re an absolute idiot.” He stated, seemingly out of nowhere. 

“Hey! Why do you say that?” You playfully defended. 

“Darling, look what you gave up. You gave up the guy of your dreams. The guy you’ve always wanted, type of guy looks and personality wise at least from what you’ve told me. I never would have expected all that from Roger. And have you seen the way he looks at you? I watched him all of rehearsal; he can’t keep his eyes off of you. I’d never seen Roger sadder than when you just broke up with him. I’ve known him for a little over a year, and been there when his parents divorced and grandmother died; neither time was his that upset. He knows what he could have with you; you can tell he sees it all now. I’m talking about a life with you, Y/N. a happiness, someone to rely on and pamper, and here you just threw it out the window.” 

“Well I guess I didn't think of it that way.” You admitted. 

“Obviously.” He scoffed.  

“Well,” You started, already shaking at what you were about to do. “There’s another big reason for why I decided not to stay with him.”

Here goes nothing. 

“Oh god, I don’t know how to tell you this.” You whispered. 

Freddie nodded his head expectantly. He’d had a realization. “This is the thing I don’t know, isn’t it?”

You nodded, trying to avoid his glare of betrayal. You and Freddie told each other everything. It was a part of your unofficial roommate agreement. You always wondered if there were things he didn’t tell you, but the way he was looking at you showed he’d never lied or kept anything from you once. It made you feel awful. 

“Well,” he spat, crossing his arms. “get on with it then.” 

“I, uh, I-” you stuttered, “I’m going to Spain.” You blurted out, voice cracking at the end of your confession in efforts not to cry. 

“That’s it? That’s what you thought you had to hide from me?”

“Well-”

“Y/N! Darling!” he laughed, “That’s nothing to hide from me! That’s so exciting! When are you to go? Maybe I could come with you!”

“I’m going for school, Freddie. I’m transferring. There was an opportunity that popped up, and I’ll be in one of the most prestigious orchestras in two years. I just didn’t know how to tell you I was leaving you because you’re really all I have, and I don’t know what I’d do without you.” You were trying to hold back your tears. 

“Oh.” He coughed. “Well, I-”

“Please don’t be mad,” you pled as you cut him off. 

“Y/N, I’m not mad, Darling. I’m insanely proud of you.” He laughed, getting choked up as a couple tears slid down his face. “Gonna miss you like crazy, but more proud than I’ve ever been in my life.” He smiled, flinging his arms around you as you cried happy tears of relief from stressing about him being mad. “Why didn't you think you could tell me?”  

“I just thought you’d be mad at me. You’ll be out of a place to live, won’t see me as much. I think it was honestly because I was afraid to lose you; didn’t want to accept that soon I wouldn’t be seeing you every day.” 

“Y/N. We’re gonna be just fine. I promise you.” He said, tapping the tip of your nose with his finger. “So is this the real reason you said no to Roger?” 

“Yeah,” You sadly admitted. 

“Well, I can’t tell you what to do about this one, Love. This decision is up to you, you have to recognize what you can and can’t handle when you’re away.” 

You nodded. 

“Just give yourself time to think about it. Kay?”

“Kay.”

You took a deep breath, smiling at your friend, deeply thankful for all he’d done for you. 

“I’m gonna go to John’s, okay?” 

He nodded. “You calling to borrow your new car?” 

“No. I think it'd be better if I didn’t see Roger so soon.”

He nodded understandably. “So?”

“So, I’m gonna walk. I think it’ll be a good time for me to clear my head.” 

“Be safe.” 

You rolled your eyes. He was always so worried about you, your happiness, your well being. 

“I’ll be fine.” You laughed, quickly fixing your makeup as your grabbed a coat and reached for the door. 

“Call me when you get there!”

“Love you, Freddie!” You smiled shaking your head as you shut the door behind you. 

It was time to make things right. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Roger walked in the door with a slight buzz, yet mainly drunk on his depression. Brian sat in a recliner, glaring at Roger as he hung his coat on the hook. 

“I don’t wanna hear it right now, Brian. I just lost the love of my life.” 

“You’re being dramatic, Roger. I just wanted to-”

“You just wanted to what, Bri?!” He said, throwing his hands up in the air as he sat in a chair next to him. “Make me feel even worse? Remind me how bad of a friend I am? I’m sorry, okay? Sometimes things just happen!”

Brian took a deep breath.“I wanted to say I’m sorry. I’m sorry I lost it. I just wanted her to be mine, but the decision isn’t up to me. It’s up to her. And if she chose you-”

“She didn’t choose me, mate.”

Brian was shocked. He couldn’t believe that without knowing anything, Freddie had predicted it all.

“Freddie was right about her again.” He said, shaking his head.

“I really thought she was going to, though. I damn near fell down when she decided we’d be parting ways. I really thought shed feel the same way; like we couldn’t live without each other. She’s going to Spain. That means you and I both shit out of luck. I tried to give her everything and she doesn’t care. When’d you talk to Freddie?” 

“I drove him home after rehearsal. I was upset because of everything that happened between the two of you, but Freddie said he didn’t think she had made a decision. He always knows what’s up with her, even without knowing the situation. So if you want her, you have to talk to Freddie.”

Roger thought for a moment. “But I have talked to Freddie. He told me she likes chocolate covered strawberries.” 

“No I mean you have to get closer with him, make it so he’ll tell her to go out with you; talk about you all the time. Not that I want you to do that, though.” Brian laughed. 

“Don’t worry, mate. I don’t think I’ll be hearing from her for a long time.” Pause “Do you think we have anything to worry about with her and Fred?”

“I’ve been thinking the same thing lately. I can’t tell if they’re close or if she likes him.” 

“Well then I guess we’re just gonna have to wait.” Roger said as he smiled hopefully at his friend. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You knocked on John’s door to his apartment after about a half hour walk. He opened it with the look on his face immediately going from shocked to mad. 

“Hi.”

“Please just let me explain, Deaky.”

He paused, and you were unsure of what he’d decide to do. Just as it looked like he was going to shut the door in your face, he opened all the way and slammed it shut behind you. 

You sat at his kitchen table after calling Freddie, unsure of what to say as he paced behind you. It was silent for a couple minutes. You played with your hair, put on a lip gloss, ripped up a napkin in front of you- anything to keep you distracted. It was obvious the thought of you and Roger had hurt him- something you never meant to do, but it got you thinking. Why had this upset him so much? There was only one explanation:

He had feelings for you. 

Although you just realized it, a part of you had always known.  He was still your best friend and always had been, but realizing he had feelings explained some of his actions from the last couple years of high school, like how he asked you to prom in October, eight months early. He said he didn’t want to wait and risk losing you to someone else. 

Risk losing you. 

It all made sense. You glanced back at him, his auburn hair flowing behind him as he paced, his almond eyes focused in frustration. You figured a part of you had feelings for him too, or else you wouldn’t be here right now trying to fix things. You smiled at the thought of you and John dating, how happy it’d make his mom, who loved you and always gave you the consolation you lacked in your own home. If you two ended up together, it’d seem like your whole life would have came full circle. 

“Why are you here?” he stated, breaking his silence as his pacing paused at a chair across from you.  

He caught you off guard, and with no idea what to say, you blurted out, “I like your hair.”

He looked at you puzzled, immediately confused, so he pulled out the chair and sat down. “What?”

“Um- I… I didn’t mean that.” You felt so out of place and uncomfortable. “Well I mean I did, your hair looks great. I like it long. But that’s not why I’m here.” You let out a sigh as John blew out a puff of air, attempting to not look at you. It was silent for a moment. “I think you know why I’m here.” 

“Fucking get on with it then. Guess I was a bloody idiot for not thinking this day would ever come.” He spat. 

“What do you mean?” 

“It’s nothing- no sense in you knowing at this point. Just get it over with.” His voice was cold and hurt. It made you feel dreadful. 

“John I just wanna talk. Roger and I are over.”

His eyes perked up, figure relaxing a bit.  

“So you two were together?” 

“No, not really. I don’t know. I just don’t think he’s the right choice for me right now with how my life is kinda playing out. Now I know you got upset earlier, and I understand why, but there’s nothing with Roger and I anymore. In my eyes it was just like meeting someone at a bar and going home with them that night, or meeting someone on vacation. That’s happened to you before, right?” Of course that was a complete lie, you loved Roger, but you just were trying to make him happy at this point. 

He nodded. “Oh, I guess I over reacted.”

You smiled, seeing you were getting through to him.  

“What about the coats then?” 

“Roger bought those for us before we even went on the trip. He tried real hard to get us to be a real relationship; he really likes me. But I…” You sighed. “I just don’t know.” 

“Oh. I’m sorry I- Well, you know. I just- I’m sorry I don’t know how to say this.” He nervously laughed. 

“I know.” You smiled, reaching across the table for his hand. 

“You do?” 

You nodded. “Well I mean you stormed out when you heard I had sex with another guy, asked me if I loved him. I kinda put two and two together.” You laughed. 

“I was planning to ask you out a week after you got to school, did you know that?” He admitted, slightly sad yet sincere. 

“You what?”

He spoke with a smile lit across his face. “Mhm. Sat there under that willow tree crying like a baby for hours after you left me. I already had the order for the flowers in to a florist near my school, had the route highlighted on the map I’d be using to drive to your dorm.” his smile faded, a look of sadness replacing it.  “But that’s in the past. I’ve barely talked to you in over a year so, you know,”  He laughed awkwardly. “Things change. People change.” 

“Oh, John.” You gasped, hand slapping over your mouth as you tried to hold back the tears at the thought of what would have been. “I would’ve said yes.” You whispered. 

He shook his head in disbelief. Angry at himself for not asking you sooner, while also angry with you for cutting him out. “You- you can't tell me that now. You messed up, Y/N. Now you’ve gotta fix it.” 

“Don’t you think I know that!? Why couldn’t you have asked me earlier!?”

“Because I was afraid I’d lose you! In my eyes I couldn’t win! I’m always so fucking afraid of losing you, Y/N, yet look where we are now!” He yelled back. You both stood at the same time as your argument fumed larger. 

“Well maybe if you’d have stopped being so afraid, you wouldn’t have lost me! I would have been your girlfriend! You can’t just put this all on me John,” You yelled, hands flying up in the air, “you’re the one who couldn’t ask me out!”

“You’re the one who broke my heart romantically and lost me my best friend, so yeah, maybe I could have asked you out earlier! But excuse me if I wanted to be romantic and surprise you with it while you were all alone off at college! Maybe I can take some of the blame, but a lot of this is on you, Lovely!” He yelled, an annoyed tone apparently in his voice. 

“What about prom night!?!? Was that not romantic enough for you?! I got a purple dress because you say you like me in purple! I wanted to wear black! We danced just the two of us the entire night! Maybe if you made a move we’d be together!!!” 

“Maybe if you made a move and didn’t cut me off none of this would be happening! He yelled, the two of you now yelling in each other’s faces. 

“Maybe if you’d just shut up!” you yelled, grabbing his shoulders as you pulled him in for a kiss. His hands ran through your hair, and the kiss didn't go too far. It was so passionate from both of your anger, that it was very hard, yet there was so much behind it. Sparks seemed to fly as pent up emotions flooded around the two of you. He pulled away as you both just gasped for air. 

“Did you just kiss me?” He said. 

“Yeah?” 

“Oh my god, you just kissed me.” He paced. “Y/N, I’m sorry. I don’t know how to deal with this right now.” He said. 

“I’m sorry I didn’t mean to offend-“ 

“Offend me? Y/N, Lovely, I’ve been waiting for this for years.” He said, smiling as he walked back over to you, caressing your cheek in his hand. “I’ve missed you. You always look like a little doll.” He smiled. “I’ve missed my best friend.” 

“I’ve missed you too, Deaky.” You said, tapping your finger on his nose. 

“Don’t think that was me friend-zoning you, because I’m not.” He said awkwardly, and it made you laugh. 

“Don’t worry, I’ve missed my best friend too.” You glanced at the clock behind him. “I really should get going. I’ve got a half hour walk and I want to be back before sundown.” You smiled. 

“I’ll drive you.” he said, grabbing his keys off the counter immediately. 

“Oh no that’s alright. I like walking.”

“But I don’t want anything to happen to you, I don’t want to lose you again.” 

“I’ll be fine. Freddie’s waiting for me.” 

“Alright,” he reluctantly agreed. “Call me when you get home?” 

“Of course, just like old times.” You smiled, recollecting how John would make you call him when you got home from his house even though you just lived down the street. “Bye Deaky.” You said, kissing his cheek as you put in your coat. 

“Lovely,” he started, “What does this mean for us?”

“That we’re becoming close again?” You naively said. 

“You know what I mean.” 

“I just can’t have a relationship right now. Are you free tomorrow? I don’t have classes Wednesday’s. I just want to explain why, where I’m going and all.” 

“I’m free whenever you need me to be, Y/N.” He smiled. “What time do you want me to pick you up? We can make a day out of it, just like old times.” He smiled, reaching for your hand. 

“Just like old times.” The saying made you warm and fuzzy. “Is one okay?” 

“Whatever you say, Darling.” He glowed, kissing your cheek. “I’ll see you at one.” 

“Kay. Bye John.” You said, hugging him as you left his apartment. 

“Bye, Lovely.” He smiled, clutching his chest, the grin not leaving his face the entire night. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After you and Freddie ate, you both were awfully tired from the eventful day and decided to go to sleep, but had never felt so empty and uncomfortable. 

“Freddie, can you come lay with me?” You said in the darkness. 

“Mhm.” He responded, half awake. Once he laid next to you, he was out in seconds, but it still felt like something was missing. There was no chest to put your head on, or arms to be wrapped around your waist. The only thing you had was the body heat from another person, yet you still felt the longing deep in your heart. After hours of stone cold emptiness, it was about 3:30 in the morning, when you finally couldn’t take it anymore. You quietly got up and slipped on your slippers, throwing your silk robe over your shoulders as you quietly rushed to the phone at the end of the hall, dialing the number from Freddie’s address book.

“Hello?” The voice groggily said. 

“Hi, it’s Y/N. I can’t sleep. I keep thinking about how I miss having someone with me, and I know how I left things today, and was planning on taking to you tomorrow, but I had to call.”

“I can’t sleep either” 

“Can you come get me?”

He sighed. 

“Yup. ‘Course.” He said, grabbing a coat. “I’ll be there in fifteen minutes. 

“Thank you.”

“No, thank you.” The smile in his voice made you giddy with excitement. As you hung up the phone, something made you look down. 

The diamond in your treble clef necklace made you think about what you just had done. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A/N- Who do you think she called?? Rog or John? I hope youre just as shook as i am!Q&A tmmw! Love y’all-C

Taglist: @yourlocalmusicalprostitute , @bismillahnah , @deakysmisfire , @queer-heart-attack , @everything-you-dont-wanna-be , @mercurycrowley , @ikbenplant , @xcdelilahxc , @chekovs-davy-jones-wig , @laedymoon , @manicpixydreamgirl , @jaylikesguavass

#Queen #queen fanfic #queen fic #roger taylor #roger taylor smut #roger taylor x reader #John Deacon #john deacon x reader #Brian May #brian may x reader #freddie mercury #freddie mercury x reader #platonic!freddie mercury x reader #liliah39 #liliah39 masterlist #clgol #clgol series #clgol aesthetic #clgol asks #clgol q&a #crazy little game of love #crazy little game of love aesthetic #crazy little game of love series #crazy little game of love asks #crazy little game of love q&a #queen x reader #bohemian rhapsody #BoRhap #borhap x reader #ben hardy x reader

[embidoesocrp]

Comprehensive RP Standards & Rules

Please Note: If I’m slow or unable to reply, there’s likely a very good reason behind it (ie. mental illness/lack of spoons, inability to get into character, personal matters, etc). All I ask is that you’re patient and understanding -- we’re only human after all! You can even occasionally inquire updates from my end since I do care about keeping both of us up-to-date. Thanks for understanding!

RP Standards & Guidelines

This RPer is friendly/practices [unless otherwise stated] towards the following:

OCs and muses

Multi-verse & AU’s (unless otherwise stated or specified in RP Blog descriptions)

Smut/SRP, NSFW, Fluff, Dark/Triggering content

Trigger Warnings will be tagged respectively -- please notify the mun if you’d like a TW tagged on a post!

SRP will be censored via Read-More Feature

Multi-ships – both platonically & romantically; Canon×OCs are welcome!

by default, i make ships strictly tied to a respective relationship sub-verse tag -- main verses are usually left without a permanent relationship.

because the mun welcomes almost all kinds of ships (albeit depending on the fandom), be sure to check for respective ship tags in order to blacklist appropriately for those you do not like!

Chemistry/Relations between muses = RP/Interacting with each other

This way, I’m able to get a feel for how you portray your muses, and can determine whether or not there’s compatibility. This also helps me understand you as an RPer, too!

regardless of muses being canon or OC’s, please consider having some chemistry (interactions/threads) done before trying to ship with my muses!

As much as I advocate having All the Ships™, jumping straight into ships without getting a feel of your muse(s) makes it difficult for me to get into them. (´・ω・｀) Apologies about that!

pre-plotted/pre-existing relationships will require that we’ve RP’d together enough for me to get a feel of your RP style, especially with OC’s.

canon characters & their canonical history/relations are assumed to be their default and are thus taken into consideration unless circumstances (i.e. AU’s, verses, etc.) state otherwise

regardless, i would still highly recommend we interact with each other enough so that I get a feel of your portrayal!

Format Leniency™ w/ icons, rp length and formatting as well as script-style and paragraph-style RPing (link for info on ‘em) 

script-style/in-character RPing for me will always be in third-person for action

basically, you are absolutely free to follow your own kind of format, and are not obligated to follow the length/format that I use so long as I have something to work with!

Getting referenced/mentioned/involved in other RP threads (IT’D BE AN HONOR.) 

muses that I refer to for specific circumstances (i.e. events from a thread, sub-verses, etc.) will be @mentioned on my part.

‘Read-More’ Censorship – for SRP, spoiler content, extreme gore [on a (N)SFW labeled blog], & long posts

Aged-up versions of fictional characters who are originally/canonically no younger than 14 years old.

I am perfectly, absolutely aware of the fine lines over aging up fictional minors for smut content and will admit that I am perfectly fine/understanding towards RPing such things—so long as it applies to the 14+)—while also fully understanding the controversy it brings.

Aged-up characters or verses that I RP/provide are never intentionally or solely made for smut/SRP content, nor will they ever be.

There’s a good chance that any of my originally/canonically minor teenager whose blog is labeled 18+ may imply an aged-up verse for SRP content. Hopefully, this will help determine if you should be wary of these blogs of mine!

If all else fails, you are absolutely allowed to politely and respectfully ask if there is an aged-up verse with potential SRP content! This way, you can blacklist appropriately.

RP Blogs with smut content will always be labeled accordingly

Rule of Thumb on Age Gaps for Ships: no more than 2 years between minors with 18-year olds, and 3 years between muses aged 18-20 years old with 21+.

Even then, minor×adult SRP/smut is PROHIBITED.

Both muns must take/understand necessary precautions when involving aged-up fictional characters or minor muses, consider any adjustments that may be needed, and must be both adults (18+). 

Of course, if you yourself actually condone pedophilia, I will block you.

This RPer is against/does not practice the following:

Godmodding Rude/Excessive reminders to reply to thread Complaints of unreplied/dropped threads

Engaging in SRP content with minors – will be blocked upon discovery

doesn’t include engaging in SFW content, but once you are blocked you’re unable to interact with me at all

I do not condone pedophilia and RP smut with RPers who are minors.

Reblog Karma – you are not obligated/required to send an ask in exchange for its respective inbox meme; feel free to reblog any memes from me!

If you, however, do practice reblog karma and I reblog without sending something in, though, please let me know!

Likewise, if you prefer people reblogging from the source and not you, please let me know if I ever do as such! I am a very forgetful bun.

Hate mail/anons in any shape or form (ie. suicide instigation, death threats, cyber-bullying)

Hate/‘Phobias’ towards any gender

Soft-blocks — you’re either permanently blocked or not, so be sure to act accordingly.

If for any reason I have blocked you by mistake or under a misunderstanding, I will either unblock or consider unblocking.

Likewise, if you have soft-blocked me for any reason and I, for some reason, somehow, still get to you, you have every right to let me know that I’ve made you uncomfortable and request that I no longer interact with you! (And if it still persists because I can be one hell of a forgetful bun, do remember that you have the right to permanently block me, I understand!)

I’m honestly still trying to understand these soft-block mechanics, if I’m honest...

Racism, Discrimination, Witch Hunts/Call-Out posts — being actively involved in one will automatically be an unfollow & potential block from me.

Pressure regarding thread replies/involvement in drama/desired content

Mutuals-Only interactions

More often than not, my RP blogs may be side-blogs to a main hub (especially if I’m RPing more than one muse in a fandom). Please be sure to check if they are! They’ll usually be mentioned in the descriptions of the blog.

If you are a mutuals-exclusive RPer, please let me know!

Outside Reblogs on RP Threads — Unless you are the RPer(s) involved, DO NOT REBLOG the thread.

Liking & commenting the post is okay for me. HOWEVER, please also respect what rules & policies the other RPer(s) may have! They have the right to react accordingly on their part.

This RPer has the rights towards the following:

Not expanding on ask-response replies

Refusing to start/continue a thread for any particular reason

Dropping a thread for any particular reason (especially when it feels that there isn’t much to continue on in it)

Giving more attention to some threads than others

Being finicky between doing legitimate RP threads vs. casually being IC

Being finicky with social interactions between individuals

Not becoming mutuals

Other Universal Standards & Guidelines

Dash Organization > Mutuals-Exclusive Practices

Follows & Mutuals =/= Interaction Privileges --- for me, follows are a means of controlling the content on my dash, not an indication of whether or not I want us to interact!

Depending on the blog’s popularity, RP blogs may or may not be fandom-restricted (interactions exclusive to canon/-versed/-oriented muses/OCs), unless exceptions for particular individuals are granted.

Multi-Muse Blogs are less likely to be followed (which might also be highly dependent on blog’s popularity) for dash content organization, especially if the muses extend across multiple fandoms.

Interactions > Reading Rules/Following when it comes to receiving a follow from me as it again depends on how often we interact.

Individual RP Blogs can and will have their own, more specific guidelines to follow depending on its fandom/popularity! 

 Policies can usually be found at the top of the blog’s description, listing what the blog consists of and what content is followed/allowed/restricted.

These policies can and will overrule respective universal policies here.

RP & Liked Content =/= Morals & What I Condone

Likewise, even if there are ships/morals/opinions that do not match with mine, it’s just as the saying goes: to each their own. So long as conflicts do not rise, we can still interact! People can like different things and still be nice to each other. God, I can’t stress this enough.

“I find that, for me, the work is a safe place to put all the stuff you don't want to put in your real life. I don't want to be a crazy, manic asshole. I don't want to have an affair. I don't want to have a fucking gunfight. But! There's a part of your brain that wants to experience everything, and so work's a safe place to explore it all. Both in the writing and in the performing. I get to write about an affair. I get to have the guilt and the feeling of that without having to fuck my life up. [laughs] Art is the place to safely explore all those other sides of you, because the side you want to bring home is the side that wants to be a good father and be a good husband and be a good son. In art we can be fucking nuts.” -- Lin-Manuel Miranda [ x ]

Muse =/= Mun

Rule of Thumb: if the muse’s behavior is beginning to come on too strongly, chances are that I’m fully aware of this and will most likely show it via tags!

Tag Commentary — you are absolutely free to not provide OOC commentary in the tags, especially if you are an IC blog. This just helps show who I am as a mun!

Level of Investment = Thread Priorities & Muse Activity

I, unfortunately, am inspirationally-driven when it comes to my musings, and can therefore be selective with my activity or drop threads I’m unable to continue having a musing for. However, this does not mean I have anything against you, it’s just how my fuel for RPing works. 

Still, I do my best to answer all my threads, so please be patient and understanding with me! Thanks!

By default, I will always assume that threads with me are the lowest priority and can/will eventually be dropped at any time by you.

All in all, so long as we keep to our own lanes instead of actively pursuing the other on behalf of our differences in beliefs, there shouldn’t be any problems. RPing is meant to be a fun, creative and laid-back FICTIONAL environment that is meant to be kept separately from reality.

Regarding Asks & IMs

IC & OOC Asks outside of inbox memes are allowed!

If sent anonymously for side-blog reasons, tag your blog and it will be re-tagged for notification purposes!

ex: ((@nameofrpsidebloghere))

If responding to an ask-response, please post it in a new text post by tagging the blog name and adding a link to the ask-response!

ask-response posts and even photo posts clutter the dashboard and ruin RP consistency...!

You are free to IM me for plots and reply reminders! (I’m a really lenient, GWF/go-with-flow RPer) 

Please note, however, that if I feel the thread isn’t really going anywhere, no longer following a sort of plot, and/or isn’t keeping my interest, I eventually assume that it’s drop-able and will drop it myself.

Universal Tags for Inbox Memes & Themed Starters

For IC

Ask/M!A/RP asks --- #askmarp memes || #askmarp response

Ask/Inbox Memes --- #inbox memes || #inbox response

Themed Starter Memes --- #starter memes || #starter response

Drabble Memes --- #drabble memes || #drabble response

For OOC aka the Mun 

Ask/Inbox Memes --- #mun inbox memes || #mun inbox response

Themed Starter Memes --- #mun starter memes || #mun starter response

For NSFW Content

Ask/M!A/RP asks --- #nsfw askmarp memes || #nsfw askmarp response

Ask/Inbox Memes --- #nsfw inbox memes || #nsfw inbox response

Themed Starter Memes --- #nsfw starter memes || #nsfw starter response

For a Faster Inbox Response – include corresponding rp/ask meme post! 

 ex: [Name of Meme Here!:] ♡ - symbol description here!

If even after reading the standards you still aren’t certain how RPing with me is like, you can also refer to these universal tags:

#rp guidelines - guidelines I follow as an RPer

#chill rp blog is chill - worrisome topics I’m okay with as an RPer

That aside, when in doubt, just ask! I’m totally cool with it, and always want to make sure the both of us are having a fun, comfortable time RP/interacting IC with each other! Do also remember that you are always, always able to just unfollow me, even softblock me if you have to (though I’d appreciate a direct notification/explanation for the first time I address the softblock if that ever occurs...!).

Were you able to read the whole thing?

Feel free to let me know by sending ‘whispers among psithurism’ in the ask (you aren’t required to, though)! Thanks for taking time to read this! Happy RPing!

#rules #blog info #info #i #rule #rp standards #rp rules #rp standards & rules #r #LABEL ;; important

[frenchibi]

top 5 books

Hello friend!!!! This is areally really tough question bc I read so many different genres and have SOMANY FAVORITES so I’m going to cheat a little bit… I’ll give you Top3 or 4 (I have no impulse control) for several genres so you’ll get more than 5total but not like.. an inordinate number of books, ok? xD (Who am I kidding I’mgoing off the rails, no apologies)

Fantasy

The Name of the Wind(Kingkiller Chronicles Book 1) and sequel(s) by Patrick Rothfuss. Has beentalked about loads in fantasy circles and I have nothing to add other than“this is the best fantasy book I have ever read, and probably in the top 3 ofbest books I have ever read, period.” The style blew me a way, the characters are fantastic, the system of magic/power in this world is the coolest I have EVER SEEN and… yeah. I’m invested.

Howl’s Moving Castleand sequel(s) by Diana Wynne Jones. Y’all remember the ghibli movie? This isthe book this is based on and it is way, way better than the already fantasticmovie. It is ridiculously charming and witty and lovely and I recommendeveryone read it. You will not regret it. This is my ultimate comfort book, if that makes any sense.

Good Omens by Neil Gaiman and Terry Pratchett – a hilarious bookabout the apocalypse with absolutely amazing characters and incredible styleand wit. We’re getting a TV series this year and I am beyond stoked. Pleaseread this. It’s… just… yes. British fantasy is SO GOOD.

Honorable mention: Die Stadt der TräumendenBücher by Walter Moers. Theremight be an English translation of this, but honestly I only recommend you readthis if you can read it in its original German – I’m not gatekeeping, it’s justthat so much of its brilliance relies on in-depth knowledge about German culture,history and language and it’s inevitably gonna lose that in translation. It’sone of my absolute favorite books ever and it pains me I can’t share this withmy English-speaking friends :/

YA

The Knife of Never Letting Go (Chaos Walking Book 1) by Patrick Ness. It’shands down the coolest YA book I have ever read and it doesn’t even… feel likeYA at all, more like sci-fi? It could just as easily have gone in the “experimental”category and I don’t wanna give too much away but… the typeface of this book ispart of its charm? Different characters have different fonts and shit? Definitelyread a physical copy of this. Also, the narrator is illiterate so he writeswords by sounding them out – and I know that sounds like that would bedistracting but trust me it’s fantastic??? Please please PLEASE give this atry.

The Watchmaker of Filigree Street by Natasha Pulley. Y’all want a good queerstory that’s not romance-heavy but instead has intricate worldbuilding and really cool magic? Pleaseread this, you will not be disappointed. This is a more “adult” version of YoungAdult Fiction and I absolutely love it.

A Darker Shade of Magic by V.E. Schwab. Is this fantasy, actually? Probably. Does it haveissues? Yes. Is it still a very fun ride with a cool magic/power system? HELLYES. Also the characters are a bit older, which works very well. It’s like YAafter you’ve kind of outgrown YA.

Murder/Mystery

The Strings of Murder (& sequels in the “Frey & McGray” series) by Oscar de Muriel –listen, the main character is a little SHIT and that’s absolutely fine? Themysteries are kind of convoluted but not in a distracting way, it’s just a funseries with fun characters that I really enjoyed!

The Seven Dials Mystery by Agatha Christie (and honestly pretty much everything she has everwritten) – I have nothing to say about Agatha Christie that has not been saidbefore :’D

Phantom bySusan Kay. Now this is kind of also a drama and it’s been a while since I’veread it so idk how well it fits into the murder/mystery category but it’s aboutthe Phantom of the Opera before he became the actual Phantom (or rather, thepath to how he became the Phantom), and I have endless love for this verydramatic and mysterious and misunderstood character so… yeah :D

Collections of Short Stories

Topics About Which I Know Nothing by Patrick Ness. Yes, this is the author of “ChaosWalking” (see above), and this is a collection of a VAST variety of shortstories he has written, all of which are insanely creative and so, so fun??This man has an insane imagination and I love it, instant recommendation toanyone honestly.

Dear Life byAlice Munro – another one that I read a while ago and don’t remember that muchabout, but I remember absolutely loving this book, and that it’s one of thebooks that made me want to read more short story collections :D

The Refugeesby Viet Thanh Nguyen – an interesting bit of perspective, this book centersaround different characters who are Vietnamese or of Vietnamese descent in theUnited States. I loved how eye-opening it was tbh?? I love reading books byauthors from cultures vastly different from my own and this was wonderful.

Poetry/Experimental

Milk and Honey / The Sun and Her Flowers by Rupi Kaur – two collections of very personaland touching modern formless poetry that honestly blew me away. I’m not a bigfan of classic poetry, or poetry in general, but these two books are justincredible.

Good morning, Good night by Lin-Manuel Miranda – a collection of Lin’s “good morning”/ “goodnight” tweets that, idk, give me hope for humanity? Ideal for perusing if youneed cheering up and just an all-round wholesome book to own.

Ella Minnow Pea by Mark Dunn – a “novel without letters” I wouldn’t know where to placeexcept under “experimental” because its premise is basically… an island thatslowly bans more and more letters from everyday use? It’s told in the form ofletters between the characters and it’s just… such a FEAT of writing, the waythe author forces his characters (and himself) to get by with fewer and fewerletters of the alphabet? Fascinating, from a writer’s perspective, and anabsolute recommendation!!!

Sleeping Giants (Book 1 of the Themis Files) by Sylvain Neuvel. This is a sci-fi book,but it’s under “experimental” because, well – it’s told through interviews. Iwas a little confused/put off in the beginning by this style, but the jaw-droppingstory pulled me in and hooked me. It’s a sci-fi EPIC… don’t get too attached toanyone because the apocalypse is coming for them all - and you’ll be at theedge of your goddamn seat. This is a fantastic series.

Drama

The Kite Runner by Khaled Hosseini. Honestly, anything by Khaled Hosseini, unsurpassedauthor of dramas that will rip your heart to shreds, and you’ll never be thesame after reading them.

Everything I never told you by Celeste Ng. This is one of those books that will never leave you afteryou’ve read it. It starts with “Lydia is dead. But they don’t know this yet.” –unravelling the mystery and consequences of the death of a Chinese-Americanfamily’s teenage daughter in gut-wrenching detail. A family story that willleave you sobbing on the floor but also filled with such profound hope forhumanity – I don’t even know. This book eviscerated me.

Homegoing byYaa Gyasi – the story of two sisters, one a slave and the other a slave-owner’swife, and their descendants. A family history of choices and consequence thatis… raw and personal and a very, very important book.

Home Fire byKamila Shamsie. The story of a British-Pakistani family – more specifically,the story of three children whose father was a terrorist. I am weak for familystories, and this one is politically charged and relevant and gut-wrenching aswell.

Novels/Fiction

The Hours byMichael Cunningham. The first book I read in a stream-of-consciousness style,and I still really enjoy the plot of it, too: The story follows three women;Virginia Woolf writing a novel in the 1920s, a woman reading this novel in the40s, and a woman basically living the plot of this novel in the 90s. It’sfascinating, really? I highly recommend it.

The History of Bees by Maja Lunde. Another story told in three time periods – a man whoinvents a new type of beehive for beekeepers in the 1800s, a beekeeper whosebees are dying in approximately present day, and a woman 100 years in thefuture who pollinates plants by hand because all the bees have vanished. It’s…fascinating, again, and a really good story. I also feel like it was quiteeducational? I enjoyed it a lot.

Small Great Things by Jodi Picoult. Technically this is a drama too (but shh) – it followsa black delivery nurse who is charged with a serious crime after an incidentinvolving the baby of a White Supremacist couple. It’s an explosive topic butit’s handled with a lot of nuance? Reading this book will frustrate you greatly,but I think it’s… idk, important? It shook me.

Eyrie by TimWinton. I have never seen depression portrayed more accurately than in thisbook. I was highlighting passages on almost every page – also the style ispretty cool? Snappy? Sharp? I’m not good at describing it but… yeah this leftan impact.

Non-Fiction (listen I knowthese are all by youtubers but hear me out)

So Much I want to Tell You by Anna Akana – letters written by Anna to her sister, who committedsuicide when she was 13. It’s raw and personal and important, stories aboutpersonal growth and lessons learned, about grief and regret and moving on. Irecommend this 100%.

Secrets For The Mad by Dodie Clark. A collection of charming stories and anecdotes and songlyrics and doodles – a book that reads like what watching dodie’s music videos andvlogs feels like. Safe and soft and personal. I love this.

Doing It byHannah Witton – a book about sex education that honestly everyone should read.Hannah blazes through taboos like they’re nothing more than hot air – as theyshould be. (Also, watch her videos.)

Bonus

The Alchemist by Paolo Coelho. I don’t even know what category to put this in? It reads like a fable and it is just... so beautiful and enchanting. Please read it, you will not be disappointed. It’s a story of chasing your dreams and self-discovery and it’s... just wonderful.

-

Did I make this entire listas a means of procrastination? Yes. Am I sorry? No.

Listen I have been wantingto blog about books for the LONGEST TIME but I never took the time to because…idk, I am not involved with the book reviewer community on any platform andhonestly I’m intimidated? But I do have a lot of Thoughts so if you’ve read anyof these and want to yell about them with/at me please dm me??? Or send me anask if you want to hear more detailed opinions about any of these from me????

…yeah. Thank you for this question,man. I love books.

Send me “top 5″ of anything and I’ll respond with my favorites!!!

#French speaks #books #book recs #rec #answered #ask me stuff