#can you guess what google thinks i want ads for. because i didn't

[zegrasdrysdale]

Can you write a pregnancy scare with Jamie?

[ not our time ] j. drysdale

paring : Jamie Drysdale x fem!reader

summary : after she’s late for her period, (Y/N) tells Jamie about her suspicions and he tells her to take a pregnancy test to make sure

warning(s) : mentions of pregnancy

author’s note : i’ve been wanting to write something like this so ty for requesting :)

quick announcement : i’ve made a google form you can submit to be added to (or taken off) the taglist that will be at the end of every fic from here on out !

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The only reason she didn't immediately get on the phone with Jamie was because she knew he is on a plane and on his way back from his week-long roadie to the east coast. She probably won'[t even tell him when he walks in the door because she knows how tired he's going to be.

She should. She could be carrying his baby.

Getting sick when she doesn't normally throw up was definitely a red flag. Then she realized she's late for her period. She's rarely ever late.

If she is pregnant, she wants Jamie to be there if the test comes back positive. She doesn't want him to be on a plane somewhere over the United States when she finds out she's carrying their child.

Before she can talk herself out of telling Jamie, a key jingles in the door and it swings open. (Y/N) looks over at the door to see a happy Jamie walk into the apartment. "Hi, baby," Jamie says.

"Hey," she replies as Jamie pulls his equipment bag and suitcase through the front door. "How was the trip? Congratulations on the wins against Philly, Buffalo, and Washington, by the way."

Jamie leaves his equipment bag by the door with his suitcase when he is finally inside. The door closes behind him and he walks over to the couch.

He tilts (Y/N)'s head back and presses a kiss to her lips. She smiles into the upside down kiss. "Wish you could've been there," he says as he pulls back. "Z set me up for an insane goal against Philly and I can't believe that it actually went into the net. That's Trevor, I guess."

"I saw the goal," she tells him. "It was very impressive, Jamie. I'm very proud of you."

A big smile forms on Jamie's lips and (Y/N) feels her heart flutter in her chest. He's so pretty, even now when he looks exhausted.

She decides in that moment to tell him.

"So, um, I have to tell you something you should know," (Y/N) says. She watches Jamie's smile falter. "It's nothing bad, I think, but it's something you should definitely know."

Jamie walks around the couch and sits next to her. "Is everything okay?" he questions. "I mean, did something happen?"

She gnaws on her bottom lip. "It's more like something didn't happen," she admits. "I haven't gotten my period yet and I've been really sick recently. I think I might be pregnant. I haven't taken a test yet because I wanted you here in case."

Another smile breaks out on his lips. "You might be pregnant?" he asks. "Oh my God. That's amazing. Do you need me to run to the store and grab tests? Snacks? Anything you need."

"I have tests," she tells him. "I just haven't taken one yet. I've been waiting for you to get back."

"Go do it," Jamie replies. "I'll be right here when you get the results."

She nods and gets off the couch. "I'll be right here."

With shaking hands, she grabs the box of three pregnancy tests out of the drawer in the bathroom. She pees on all three of them and sets them on the sink counter while she waits for the results.

(Y/N) sits on the floor with her back against the counter that the tests are sitting on. Her head leans against the counter and her eyes are closed while she waits.

Honestly, she doesn't know what kind of results she's hoping for.

If it's positive then she will love this baby with everything in her. It's a part of both of them and she will love them with her entire heart. If it's negative then it's just not their time and they can actually try later on.

It isn't the end of the world if these tests come back negative.

A soft knock rings throughout the bathroom. "You okay?" jamie asks through the door. "Do you need anything?"

"Can you come in?" she asks.

The door slowly swings open and (Y/N) stands up in front of the tests. "Did you look yet?" She shakes her head in reply. "Come on. Lets look together, okay?"

She nods and Jamie takes her hand. With a sigh, she turns around and looks down at the tests on the countertop.

One line on every single one of them. All of them are negative.

"Maybe it's too early," she tells Jamie. "I'm only a few days late for my period." Tears prick her eyes and it surprises her. She didn't think she would be this upset at a negative pregnancy test.

Jamie's happy smile when she told him that she might be pregnant pops into her mind and it breaks her heart. The tears roll down her cheeks.

"(Y/N), baby," Jamie coos. "It's okay. It just isn't our time right now."

She wraps her arms around his torso and buries his face into his chest while silent tears run down her face. "You were so happy when I told you I thought I was pregnant," she says. "I'm sorry, Jamie."

"We'll have a baby one day," Jamie tells her. "I promise. One day those results will be positive."

(Y/N) nods and feels Jamie wrap his arms around her shoulders. "I didn't think I'd be this upset," she admits. "I haven't even thought about having kids until there was a possibly I was having a kid."

He backs away and looks down at her. "I want kids with you," Jamie tells her. "Maybe when we're both more prepared, yeah?"

"Yeah," she agrees. "And when we talk more about it."

Jamie smiles and nods in agreement. "Do you want to eat some ice cream and watch Criminal Minds?" he asks. "I think we have a little bit left if you want some ice cream."

"Absolutely."

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MASTERLIST

have a request ? check out the guidelines !

wanna be added to the taglist ? fill out a form !

taglist : @fanboysfangirl @dancerbailey3 (if you're crossed out, it won't let me tag you)

#hockey imagines #hockey imagine #hockey fanfiction #hockey fic #hockey oneshot #nhl imagines #nhl imagine #nhl fanfiction #nhl fic #nhl oneshot #jamie drysdale #jamie drysdale x reader #jamie drysdale fic #jamie drysdale fluff #zegrasdrysdale request

[janmisali]

Number Tournament: Honorable Mentions

well, you've all asked for it, and I guess there's no point in waiting any further now that round one is almost over. here's some highlights from the numbers that didn't get enough nominations to make it into the tournament. (as you can work out from looking at how many nominations the numbers that made it into the tournament got, my cutoff was seven nominations, which left room for me to hand-pick three numbers that only got six to fill in the bottom seeds)

six nominations

these are the numbers that were the closest of all to making the cut. in the end, I picked ten, Rayo's number, and omega to fill in seeds 62-64, but four other numbers got six nominations but didn't make it:

25: perfectly fine square number. notably funnier than 24

81: another square. I only wanted one "boring normal integer" for the bottom seeds and like come on it had to be ten.

5040: Plato's favorite number, a very fun one

42069: both 420 and 69 already made the cut, so this would have been excessive

and now for some miscellaneous fun ideas that not enough people suggested to make the cut!

cool math things

c (the speed of light) could have been a strong contender, but physics fans were pretty much universally putting their efforts behind the fine-structure constant and the Avogadro constant, leaving other universal constants behind

the Euler-Masceroni constant got five nominations super early on in the process, some of which were even intentional (there are so many things named after Euler but I made the call that people who said "Euler's constant" without specifying were talking about this one) but never got any further than that

a lot of infinite ordinals more interesting than the standard omega were in the running, but given that omega itself only barely made it in, numbers like omega to the omega power never stood a chance. of course, given how well omega did in round one maybe those other bigger infinities could have held their own if only more people suggested them before the tournament began

Not a Number's presence in the tournament is I think very fun, but other floating point things were also nominated, just not as frequently. negative zero was a fun one, as are the handful of nominations for just slightly-off multiples of one tenth

besides star, a lot of game theory not-really-number numbers had a few fans supporting them, such as dud (deathless universal draw), a couple of tiny numbers, and one suggestion for {69|420}

meme numbers

fans of boobs were split between 80085, 58008, 8008135, and 5318008, so none of the boob numbers made it individually

perhaps even more disappointingly, only five people suggested 1312

1337 is a super dead meme so that one being unpopular isn't as surprising. but then literally nobody suggested 9001? weird!

the AACS encryption key (an illegal number) only got a handful of suggestions, which is a shame because that's a really fun one

only three people suggested "your credit card number" but if it made it past the cutoff I 100% would have put that in the tournament

meta jokes

a few people suggested variations of "the number that wins the tournament", which I think is a funnier meta joke than either of the ones that actually made the cut

a couple people also did versions of "the sum of all other numbers in the bracket" (or "all other numbers people suggested in this google form"), with a couple people who said that also thankfully adding in some conditions to only include numbers where you can actually do that

a couple people have asked me what the smallest natural number was that nobody suggested, and unfortunately (by which I mean I love this) I can't answer that because a couple people suggested "the smallest natural number nobody else suggests"

another fun one was "the number of notes on this tumblr post", which only one person suggested

three separate people did "five (the word five not the number)", "5 (the symbol not the number it represents)" and "V (the roman numeral)" (looking at them all together it kinda looks like this was the same person all three times but that's because I'm paraphrasing all of them)

googologisms and otherwise big numbers

shockingly, the famously large numbers googol and Graham's number didn't get nearly as much support as the googologisms that made it to the bracket

five people suggested numbers in the Busy Beaver sequence, but none of them suggested the same Busy Beaver number

there were also things like "the smallest counterexample to the Collatz conjecture", fully hypothetical numbers

"zillion", "bajillion", and "fuckton" got two nominations each, any of which would have been extremely fun to see in the tournament

other

a couple people just said "fibonacci number" which. do you mean like the whole sequence? maybe these should have counted for phi

two people suggested "a grizzly bear". I'm assuming that's a reference I'm not getting, because it's way too specific of a joke for two people to say that independently

there was one suggestion that was the coordinates to a restaurant in yemen called burger king 2

anyway there's literally thousands of these, and I have no intentions of at any point making a full comprehensive list of what people suggested, but I think this is a pretty good sample of what the nominees were like. there were a lot of really good candidates, but I think the 64 that made it into the tournament are a pretty dang good set of numbers!

thank you to everyone who suggested your favorite numbers, it was genuinely very fun reading through everyone's suggestions.

#number tournament #jan misali #math #mathblr

[lilacthebooklover]

NPMD Incorrect Quotes

Grace: And then they ran into my knife. They ran into my knife ten times. Steph: You mean you stabbed them? Grace: They ran into my knife.

Ruth: Are pigeons drones? Richie: What? No, I'm trying to sleep. Ruth: Think about it. How come you've never seen a baby pigeon? And why do you never actually see a pigeon nest? Because they're DRONES! Richie: *Crying* Please let me sleep...

Steph: Ow! Pete: What’s wrong? Steph: I have this weird pain right above my eyebrow. Pete: It’s called a stress headache. I got my first one when I was four.

Richie: I have a question. Pete: Shoot. Richie: Is the S or C in scent silent? Pete: I’m going to be thinking about this all day. Steph: Okay well, cent is pronounced the same way as scent so I’m gonna say the S is silent. Richie: Okay, but sent is also spelled the same way. Pete: Google says that the C was added in the late seventeenth century, so I guess the S is silent. Ruth: Plot twist, both the S and the C are silent and the E actually makes the sss sound. Pete: Ruth is not allowed to talk anymore.

Max: You know, there’s only one person in this world who can tell you what you are. Richie: Me? Max: No. Max: Me.

Ruth: I desire moisture. Pete: Please just say "I want water" like a normal person.

Steph: You know, when I first met you, I really didn’t like you. Grace, after a moment: …I thought there was going to be another half to that sentence? Steph: Nope!

Ruth: I'm an empath. When I'm around hot gay people, I start having gay thoughts.

Grace: Don’t worry, I know exactly what I’m doing. Everything is going to be fine! Pete: How can you still say that? Grace: Because sometimes, when things get tough, denial is all we have.

Steph: Pete, I got suspended from school… Pete: WHAT?!?! What did you do? Steph: My teacher pointed at me with a ruler, and he said “there is an idiot at the end of this ruler”. Pete: And…? Steph: I asked which end… Pete, unable to contain his laughter: Okay, you just made my day.

Kyle: Can I have some water? Max: *starts chugging his water bottle* Max: *chokes from drinking too fast* Max: *spills water all over himself* Max, coughing: I don't have any water.

Richie: A mosquito tried to bite me and I slapped it and killed it. Richie: And I started thinking. Richie: Like, it was just trying to get food. Richie: What if I went to the fridge and it just slammed the door shut and snapped my neck? Ruth: Are you ok?

Pete: Where’s Grace? Steph: Doing stuff. Pete: I don’t like the sound of that. Where’s Richie? Steph: Trying to stop Grace from doing the stuff. Pete: And Max? Steph: Trying to stop Richie from stopping Grace from doing the stuff. Pete: I see. And what are you doing here, Steph? Steph: I’m supposed to stop you from stopping Max from stopping Richie from stopping Grace from doing the stuff.

Ruth: Help! I’m drowning! Pete: Calm down. We’re only in six feet of water! Ruth: NOT ALL OF US ARE TALL!

Grace: Woah dude, premarital handholding? That’s just not cool or groovy.

Max on Monday: *glues a dime to the sidewalk* Heh heh heh. Max on Wednesday: *walking down the street* Ooh hey! A dime!

*Everyone is playing a board game together* Grace: I will put 'A' down to make 'A'. Richie: I will add onto your 'A' to make 'AT'. Steph: I will add onto your 'AT' to make 'RAT'. Pete: I will add onto your 'RAT' to make 'BIOSTRATAGRAPHIC'. Ruth: *flips the board*

Max: When Grace was born, the gods said, "She's too perfect for this world." Steph: Please. When she was born, the devil said, "Oh, competition."

Ruth: I wouldn’t put it in those words exactly. Pete: Why not? Ruth: Because I don't know what they mean.

Mayor Lauter: Well Stephanie, I have to say, I'm really disappointed. Steph: Well, you didn't HAVE to say it. You could've just thought it.

Max: I’m proud to say I’ve come over my fear of ghosts! Jason: Eyy, that’s the spirit! Max: *gasps* whErE???!!!??

Ruth: Make no mistake. Not only am I party rocking, but I am also in the house tonight. Richie: But are you shuffling? Ruth: Every day. Grace: What language are you two speaking??

#they have 1 collective braincell #and it belongs to pete #starkid npmd #team starkid #starkid #hatchetverse #npmd #nerdy prudes must die #npmd spoilers #incorrect npmd quotes #incorrect quotes #grace chasity #max jagerman #richie lipschitz #steph lauter #stephanie lauter #peter spankoffski #pete spankoffski #ruth fleming #solomon lauter #ruth is such a little silly #i love her

[cookinguptales]

time to shill for Big Salt!!!

Okay, so like I said in my last post, I recently became a ~Vitassium Ambassador~, which is a fancy way of saying that I shilled for this company for free for so long that now they're paying me to do it.

In salt. Much like a deer.

Anyway.

Vitassium is SaltStick's line of products specifically for POTS, EDS, Cystic Fibrosis, Vasovagal Syncope, and other forms of autonomic dysfunction. Essentially speaking, SaltStick has been making electrolyte products for years, and when they realized that a lot of their patients buying them were doing it for medical reasons, they started doing research into creating products specifically for that purpose. And that's how the Vitassium line was born.

Vitassium generally has more salt and less magnesium/calcium/potassium than SaltStick's other electrolyte products, which is good if you need a lot of salt and you don't want to take too high a dose of the rest. Personally, I tend to use a mixture of both of their lines so I can get a little calcium/magnesium boost sometimes but more salt other times. (The amount of potassium is fairly similar in both lines, with a little more in the SaltStick line.)

Either way, it has a lot less sugar than Liquid IV, which I get sick off of due to sugar sensitivities. Like... *googles* 11g of sugar in Liquid IV vs. 2g of sugar in Vitassium, with the same amount of salt in each serving. I have to be pretty careful about my sugar intake, and I suppose I can't speak for everyone, but my stomach handles Vitassium a lot better than most of the other alternatives on the market.

So I've been using it for several years now and I'm really happy with their products! Like -- I may now officially be a shill for Big Salt, but I don't plan on lying or exaggerating anything here. I use their products every day, and sometimes that's the only way I can manage to take a shower.

(My fellow POTS/EDS-sufferers know, the shower struggle is real. lmao)

Anyway, they just sent me one of everything in their Vitassium line. They didn't actually ask me to show it off, but I'm doing it anyway because this is my blog and I cannot be stopped.

From left to right, we have a bottle of their electrolyte capsules (these are sugar-free extended-release salt pills with a bit of potassium added), both flavors of their electrolyte fastchews (chewable electrolyte candies that provide quick relief... think salty sweettarts), a cute bottle full of packets of their electrolyte drink mix, sample packs of the fastchews, and some stickers.

Personally, I mostly use the fastchews. I've tried salt capsules in the past and had some stomach upset, but now that they sent these to me for free, I guess I'll try them out again. The fastchews are basically sour candy full of salt lmao. (They also have about 2g of sugar per serving, just like the drink mix.) They really are effective, though, so I tend to take them as needed throughout the day.

I usually just keep a bottle of them in my purse, but the sample size bags are resealable and fit well in pockets, bags, etc. I'm happy that they sent me some little sample bags because now I can refill them, haha.

I used to just buy the normal SaltStick fastchews, and my go-to flavors in that line are orange, wild berry, and lemon-lime! I haven't tried the mango because I'm allergic, the peach is okay if very sour, the coconut pineapple is a nice piña colada taste but a little sweet for me, and I really hate the watermelon ones!

(Look, I promised to be honest with you. lmao)

The Vitassium fastchews are newer, and they only come in two flavors so far. I always buy the fruit punch because I despise artificial grape flavor. They just gave me a bunch of grape ones, so I tried them. Good for what they are, but I still hate grape.

(Do any of my chronically ill followers want these? lmk)

The drink mix is the newest Vitassium product! I like it quite a bit; the relief is quicker when you drink it vs. eat it, and speaking as someone who generally hates drink mixes, the flavor is pretty good.

I've tried both the fruit punch and the pink lemonade, and I think I prefer the pink lemonade. The flavor suits the salt a little better, imo, and I think weirdly it mixes a little better?

I usually buy the drink mix in the canisters because it's cheaper that way and produces less waste (the canister pictured there is one I already had) but the packets are very handy to keep in your bag. They're easy to tear open and even when you tear off the whole top, the opening is small enough that it pours smoothly into small-necked bottles. I like to put some ice in mine and shake it up.

(Side note: Vitassium has specifically designed all their packaging to be as easy to open and use as possible because they know that so many of their customers have arthritis, EDS, and other connective tissue disorders. Which, as someone with EDS, I truly appreciate.)

Finally, one thing I genuinely like about Vitassium is that they try to make their products as accessible as possible for their customers who use them for medical reasons. They have something called the Vitassium Club, which allows registered users who have a medical condition to get 25% off all their electrolyte products. You don't have to get a doctor's note or anything like that, just send in a quick online form and wait for them to change the status of your account.

That brings the cost of the product down considerably for the people who need it most, which is good because honestly? Electrolyte boosters add up fast when you need to consume that much salt every day.

Uhhhh, I think that's everything for now! If you have any questions, lmk! I'm fairly passionate about this kind of thing because when I was first diagnosed with POTS/EDS like... god, 15 years ago now, they didn't have anything like this. I remember struggling to develop a diet that worked for me with no one to teach me and honestly? That fucking sucked. I don't want anyone to be in that position.

So now here in 2023, I'm happy to pass on any chronic illness-related tips I have. Like drink Vitassium! And add salt while you're cooking, not at the end! The flavor will be less strong that way! And a packet of sugar-free hot cocoa mix will often have as much sodium in it as a bag of chips!

Stay salty, friends. 🧂💜😎

#they asked me what would make me a good shill for Big Salt #and I told them that I know a lot about the use of salt in apotropaic magic #and somehow they still put me in the program #so... there's that. lmao #vitassium #pots #postural orthostatic tachycardia syndrome #vasovagal syncope #ehlers danlos syndrome #cystic fibrosis #long post

[countriesgame]

I have to say. I don't mean to be rude, but I feel like some of these polls need some research from your part. Obviously, the fun of the game is having people submit what they associate with any given country, but a lot of the stuff people have been submitting is... a tad off.

I don't expect the average Tumblr user to know the intricacies of, say, Bulgaria or Kyrgyzstan, but I feel that's where a bit of better research from your part would go a long way. Like I know it's frustrating that there's not a lot of prompt submissions, but that's where you'd fill in, instead of doing stuff like associating entire countries with stuff like Harry Potter.

I also don't really understand what counts and doesn't count as a morbid topic, either? Some countries' polls were cool in that you deliberately avoided having terrorism and war be one of the possible prompts (I was the anon that thanked you for not including a cartel option for Mexico, once again many thanks for that), but then other countries are seemingly unable to shake that off, like Kuwait for example. It's also bizarre that you exclude Israel on account of current affairs but had no problem adding in Russia, despite the fact the Russo-Ukranian War is still ongoing and it has been confirmed they've enacted genocides in certain Ukranian cities.

It's also a little weird that the US poll was so negative when the other two comparable powers, Russia and China, got more positive choices. I get that English-speaking Tumblr is mostly American, but I'm going to be entirely real with you guys, as someone who isn't, the mindset of portraying yourselves as the world's devil is a facet of American exceptionalism. It doesn't magically stop applying to your ideology just because you think of yourselves as Satan as opposed to God. You should either commit to portraying imperialist countries negatively or treat yourselves like any other.

Sorry for the long post and for the scolding at the end, I just want to see this fun blog bloom into the best possible version of what it can be.

Believe it or not, I do actually do research, but you do understand that "doing research" for a blog, that is pretty much not important, is just... googling stuff. Yes, I could have added other stuff that wasn't HP related in the Bulgaria one, I chose it because I didn't see it as offensive per se, not like horrible associations people had for other countries, and it was the most mentioned thing by far.

Doing these polls take a lot of time. If I were to do more research, I would have to slow down the polls... a lot. And I think it's naive to think I could possibly do a good research for every single country. A lot of history is very intricate and deep and it would take me a lot of time to study... and then what? To determine myself what is important and what is not? As a foreign reading stuff in a language that is not even their own - because i can only read in three languages. I started doing this because I accepted that it was going to be imperfect. I do not have the time or the energy to do justice for every country, which was why from the very beginning I made it clear that it would be based on people's association and I would only censor what I thought was very bad. And guess what, I'm actually doing more than that. Many countries didn't have enough submissions to say 11 different things and I had to google, and choose - from what I personally think it looks more important from random websites like the country's wikipedia page or tourism information to what to visit in this country.

I do think the Israel situation is different then China and Russia, which is why I included it. It's not a "israel is evil, other countries are good" thing. I do not believe in "evil" powers. There are good people and good things everywhere, there are many horrible governments. I already explained part of my thought of not including it and I'm not going to go around discussing this again, because it was a decision I made, with what i was comfortable with. As I said, it was more of a solidarity gesture with Palestine than anything.

Lastly, please stop assuming I'm usamerican, I'm not and I've said it on this blog many times, so I don't enjoy your use of "you" to refer to me as I was was usamerican. I was not born in that country and have never lived there. When I started doing this, my point was that it would be nice to learn about other countries and share about their cultures. The US does not need this.

Other countries may be imperialists, yes, but in western culture the US dominates media in a way no other country does. I do not know if people in Asia, for exemple, feel the same way. I'm speaking for myself and, considering everyone who shares polls here is on tumblr, I'm going to assume everyone is used to a very US-centric view. This means we do NOT need to know about their culture, their cities, their monuments. God, we know about it already. So my choice to include negative options in the US was not "imperialism is bad", is the US doesn't need this.

I don't think, in a western view - that dominates tumblr - projecting Russia or China as "evil imperialists" is actually uh groudbreaking. That is literally what we hear the most. I did include things like imperialism in Russia, did not really include it in China because it was NOT as mentioned in the associations.

I'm sorry for this long ass answer, but doing this is very tiring. I am doing research and I am thinking of every single option and whether it is offensive or is it just a history fact, and is that a fun fact or is that even true, and hey that country doesn't have stuff let's see each of the single submitions stuff and see which one seems more famous or more adequate, and finding people who are from that country and talking to them and seeing if it is ok. And I do that because I care and I think learning about other cultures is very important and if at least one person is learning something about a different country is at least worth it. And maybe a lot of times that person is just going to be me doing the polls but that's okay too. And still every country I do there is someone in the tags angry at me because i either didn't include an specific thing or included something they didn't like it, even when it's knowingly what their country is most known for. If I try to care and worry about all of that, i am going to explode.

The very first week I started doing that, I was almost giving up because I felt it wasn't worth it. And my therapist said I should try to see it as an exercise to see people criticizing and being angry at me so I would get dessensitized in time (hey, can you guess that's a issue for me from this or what) and that would be good for me in other areas of my life. Clearly, I'm still not great at just listening and not being affected by that.

TL;DR: I am trying. I'm trying very fucking hard. But I am a human with a real life out of this, I don't have enough time. And I'm always trying to make decisions fast here so I won't just stop doing it. It's not always the best, but it's what I can do.

#i was going to reply in private #but you know what just going to post it so if other people feel the same #answers

[spiritofhyena]

Black salt / witches' salt

WARNING: do NOT mix it up with the edible black salt for kitchen use. They are both called “black salt” but one is salt with activated charcoal or salt from a volcanic area that can be used in cooking, the other is a mix of salt, ashes, and other non-edible things used as a protection or banishing spell. I personally use it as a halfway between warding/protection and banishing as I add things usually associated with banishing.

I tried to search up the origin of the “witches’ salt” but I didn’t find anything solid (but also I made only a couple of quick searches on google because I was crunching time as I did this either before/after work or sometimes during slow moments at work) so, my best guess would be that its origin might be derived from the use of salt in many folkloric traditions as a protection or to purify, mixed a bit with a concept similar to the "witches' bottle", but I digress.

Disclaimer again: I wrote most of this during work time and edited it afterwards so I can't guarantee the form and grammar used.

I first made black salt after a couple of quick searches for protection and banishing spells that could help me in my practice, as I first started I was a bit of an idiot (to quote Set) and didn't keep anything to protect myself around when doing divination and other things.

With time I noticed that it's a good all-around protection and also, with a couple of tweaks, could be perfect to also banish in a "bounce back to sender" way.

There are different recipes on the Internet and among witchy communities but they mostly differ for some ingredients added (or not added) and I believe all would work… but surely, IMHO, if you tailor them to your needs it would be more effective.

This is what I made for myself, and I'll also include the "return to sender" version.

Tools you’ll need:

a jar with a lid to store it

mortar & pestle (not mandatory: I don’t have one so I use a tiny ceramic casserole and one of those wooden pestles for cocktails bc that’s what I had at home… use whatever could do the job)

a candle in the colour you associate with protection and warding

Ingredients:

salt (duh-)

ashes (either incense ashes, firepit ashes/charcoal, soot or you could also use activated charcoal)

eggshells powder

black pepper

rosemary

bay leaves

sage (kitchen kind is perfect!)

whatever herb you associate with protection

Process:

Honestly, you should do this however it feels right for you. You could cast a circle, call the elements or whatever. I don’t do that because it’s not part of my practice. You don’t even need to cleanse or anything if you don’t feel it’s necessary: it’ll work anyway.

Light the candle (ofc if you think it’s needed) and put the ingredients in the mortar, a little bit at a time, to grind them a bit and most importantly mix all of them. Focus on your intention, if you feel you need to recite something to enchant it then do it. Mix all the ingredients, I usually start with salt, add eggshell powder, all the other ingredients and then another bit of salt at the end to “close” everything.

If you want to give it a little “boost” you could write on a bay leaf “I am protected” or the like and then burn it (do it in a fireproof container! bay leaves are nasty burners and like to pop a lot!) to “activate” it and mix it to the rest of the ingredients.

When everything is all mixed, then you can pour it into the jar and close it. It’s up to you if you want to seal the lid with some wax or not. I do not do it because if I decide to redo it I can open it and clean the jar more easily before preparing the new black salt.

Again, it’s up to you if you want to charge it under the moonlight/sunlight or in some other way: do what you feel that's right to do.

And that’s it! Congrats you made black salt that will protect your space!

For the return-to-sender version:

add more pepper

slap also some paprika or better some chilli pepper powder

also put there some garlic

you can add other ingredients you associate with banishing

add a bay leaf (or also a piece of paper) with the intention written on it like “the harm/malicious intent is returned to who cast it” or whatever you feel right

complete!

#hyena's notes #witches' salt #black salt #witchcraft #spell jar #protection spell jar #warding spell #witchblr #spells #magic

[bomberqueen17]

what fresh hell

ugh so remember that post about my thumb and cellulitis

well i finished the ten-day course of antibiotics onnnnn July 27th, I've just counted it out now.

Yesterday, August 4th, I noticed a mosquito bite on my hand was exceptionally itchy. By the afternoon I had narrowed down that it was on the same thumb where I'd had the infected cut. By evening i was starting to suspect that it was not a mosquito bite, because the other bites I'd received that day had all calmed down and this one was only itching more.

This morning, August 5th, it is distinctly swollen, with a darker red patch at the center of the almost-blister. It is radiating pain out to the main joint of my thumb and around the back of my hand. This is not a mosquito bite. There was no reinjury. This is the infection recurring at the initial site, apropos of nothing as far as I can tell.

I am deeply unimpressed with the situation. I guess I'll try Urgent Care. Of course I'm 300 miles away from my primary care physician.

Upsettingly, when I went to google maps and typed in Urgent Care, it was clearly displaying me paid results-- only facilities from one particular company showed up, including closed sites. I was thinking of a specific one, so I scrolled manually on the map to the site where I know it was, and it showed me the neighboring businesses, so I zoomed in and zoomed in and zoomed in until finally it showed me the name of the urgent care where I'd been before-- which, I might add, had a name that contained the syllables "urgent care" spelled correctly, which the company it was preferentially showing does not-- and even then the name it showed me, that I had specifically zoomed in for, was not clickable and i had to go and manually type it into the search bar.

To discover that yes, that site does open today, in about an hour. So I think I'll go there, even though they get mixed reviews and didn't do a fantastic job on my stitches when I was there in April. (According to Google. You last visited in April. You don't think my search algorithm should show me places I've visited when I search for that thing again? *cough* Could it be any more transparently not an algorithm for my benefit?) They did fine, and that's all I care about really, and also if they say "this is outside our abilities" like the urgent care in Buffalo did when i showed up with the cellulitis streaking down my arm, the nearest hospital is much closer to that one than to the place Google wants me to go.

IDK I just feel like there shouldn't be manipulation of urgent healthcare results that make you travel farther. I honestly feel like there shouldn't be paid placement in maps at all, especially not ads that unsafely disrupt your use of a thing you're meant to use while driving, but obviously I do not make laws. But really, hiding the closest urgent care, to which I've been before, from me when I searched for it is a bit much, don't you think?

Anyway I'm throwing this into the queue and if I know anything more before it posts I'll update-- oh yes, update, the urgent care PA first wanted me to try allergy meds for a possible insect bite despite how large and swollen this was, but then i took off my watch and discovered that it is streaking down my wrist again, and she believed me then that it's a recurrence of the infection. she prescribed me the kind of antibiotic that makes you allergic to the sun, but if it gets any worse I have to go to the ER to get a culture from it to find out what kind of critter it is that's definitely haunting me.

Official diagnosis: Haunted Thumb

#about the author #fresh hells

[cuubism]

If you don't mind me asking - what do you think Dream's attitude/reaction towards Tolkien's works (including the legendarium!) would be? (I'm asking a lot of Sandman bloggers this, because I'm extremely curious regarding your takes on this.)

oh! hang on i gotta brush up on my tolkien because i haven't actually read any of the books since like. 2011.

i guess my main thought would be about how dream missed like, 95% of his work when he was stuck in his Jar. my understanding (read: google search) is that tolkien was building up the mythology for his stories before 1916 (when dream was captured), but most of it was not finished/published until a while after.

(this became an insane and mostly unrelated rant i am so so sorry)

i think a lot about how much of his own... area of work and power dream missed when he was trapped. the 20th century, generally speaking, was a time of rapid growth in storytelling methods and media more generally. dream missed almost all of radio, particularly radio as it became a medium for stories. radio was invented in the late 1890s but didn't see a proper rise into a storytelling medium, rather than mainly a direct communication one, until around the 30s. so dream missed the creation and growth of the first, i guess you would call it, networked storytelling, and technological storytelling, and what was... probably? the biggest return to an auditory type of storytelling since the original oral tradition, folk tales, great epics etc, for radio at its peak of cultural relevance (at least in the US and probably the ""West"" more generally, alas i can't speak as knowledgeably for other parts of the world, obviously plenty of other parts of the world had radio in the early 20th century and onward, but i don't know much about its use as a fictional storytelling medium versus for news and government broadcasts. something to look into! part of why radio became such a medium in the usa was because of our rampant capitalism and commercialism lol, so less capitalistic places might have approached it differently - here, advertisers wanted to figure out a way to monetize radio better, but obviously people aren't going to just listen to hours of ads, so they packaged them around stories, live music performances, and variety shows. that's where soap operas as a form come from -- they were originally sponsored by soap companies! also serials, though of course books have also been serialized in the past. and sponsored radio programs also birthed the sort of episodic comedies that eventually evolved into the half hour TV comedies we know today)

which also means - as a direct result of missing radio, dream also missed the rise of television as a medium - it grew directly out of radio, even the big networks we know today, CBS, NBC, and ABC were originally radio networks. television has ended up being a huge change in visual storytelling, not only in its inception, but especially in its more recent years - it's probably the only long-form audiovisual storytelling medium, which is something that didn't really exist before. huge shift in storytelling possibilities. he also missed the development of comic books, and the internet, and the resulting increased accessibility of art and storytelling to both artists and art lovers. he missed an absolutely huge, HUGE shift in the democratization of art and the ability to share it. and, once again, the development of totally new methods of storytelling in the form of internet video! not to even mention the accessibility of MUSIC, music recording and sharing was still in its infancy when dream was imprisoned and now you can get, and make, and share pretty much any music imaginable! and the new genres! and the intermediality of everything and the cross-cultural awareness!

this is not even getting into the new ease of photography, or film, which was also relatively new in 1916. imagine going into a coma when there were only silent films, and waking up to everyone and their mother making tiktoks. the last film you saw was one of chaplin's or something and then you come back and see interstellar in imax 3d. i think i'd explode. (dream would love film, too, it's very dreamlike)

dream returning to the waking world in 2022 and immediately having the entirety of tiktok beamed directly into his head:

(another thing i think about a lot but won't get into because i'm already rambling - hob witnessing the entire development of accessible writing from the printing press to fucking social media. insanity. i want to pick his brain on it

what pushed hob over the edge, do you think. what's the one thing he saw written online that briefly made him regret ever getting involved in printing at all and wish everyone was illiterate again. it was not porn, btw, mr. monsterfucker gadling can handle anything, ok. no, it was something much worse...)

anyway. rambling over. this is all to say that i am not a tolkien expert and haven't read much of his stuff anywhere recently - though i was quite obsessed with it in middle/high school - so my main thought is in relation to dream getting cut off from all of these great stories. it must have been like, to put it flippantly, your favorite tv show getting cancelled halfway through after a cliffhanger XD. he has all these stories from great storytellers - tolkien included - storytellers who are building their whole own worlds in his realm, storytellers he's nurturing and supporting in his own way - and gets ripped away from them. and when he returns, they're all gone.

here's hoping someone who knows more about tolkien can give you an answer more specifically relevant to that. that's all i got for now 😂

#never get me started talking about media history. then again i kinda started myself on it this time #thanks for the ask! sorry for the lack of relevant answer lol #dream of the endless #tolkien #hamelin-born #ask #i think dream would actually like tiktok after he got over the sheer volume of existing content lol #like i feel like the endlessness and interconnectedness of the internet is similar to how it already feels in his mind #media history #belatedly thinking AGAIN about all the stuff dream missed like all of the cultural changes? the story genres? the new poetry and new style? #NEW ART MOVEMENTS? THE MOVEMENTS HE MISSED. DREAM MISSED FUCKING SURREALISM THAT IS UNACCEPTABLE IT WAS LITERALLY INSPIRED BY HIM #all the subcultures of story and art creation he missed. i'm gonna lose it actually

[advisinghat56]

okay i spent about 30 hours on this motherfucker i am going to tell you about him now.

This is Christophe.

Everything on him is completely removable (except for his hair/face)(I didn't take off his clothes because then I would have to put them back on).

Any little black button that you see is a completely functional snap. I didn't want to give myself parkinson's doing and undoing tens of tiny buttons, not to mention the fact that i don't even own any buttons small enough for this project.

He’s even got the little details on his face, although they aren’t as noticeable as I thought they were. I made a little dogtag necklace for him to wear, because it's a really strong personal headcannon of mine and you can pry it from my cold dead hands. You can only see it if his shirt is unbuttoned though. He also has a dog toy squeaker. (Yes my dog has already tried to eat him.)

In all, I am very happy with him, even though I need to finish and fix some things, (notably the shirt, with its missing pockets and unfinished edges. (Side note- Christophe’s shirt doesn't actually have any buttons or even an opening along the front, but i decided that it would function better if I added those.)) I'll add the pockets later. I think the fleece is thin enough that I can get away with it.

If you look hard enough, you might be able to tell that one arm is a slightly different shade of tan because I didn't realize that the fleece that I had and the fleece that I bought was TWO SLIGHTLY DIFFERENT COLORS.

I actually had a really hard time with the sash because I couldn't find a good reference. I admit I didn't look very hard (but i DID look at an unhealthy amount of fanart), but I still couldn't find much. The fandom page only had front views, and searching google images didn't help much either. The front was fine, but the back was barely shown. I noted ONE scene (where at the very end) it was on screen for maybe half a second, so I had a vague idea of what it looked like.

I could’ve just left it there. I didn't need to double check. Nobody sees the back anyways. It doesn't matter. There is no point.

But i am nothing if not stubborn.

I don't actually have HBO max. So I went for the second best thing- Ze mole all scenes compilations on youtube. However, the only one I found was from 12 years ago. It's mirrored. The quality is shit. There's a fade transition between every scene. But I got it. I got the back shot I'd wanted. Here it is, in all its pixely glory.

I'd gotten it.

And I had absolutely no clue what I was looking at. (still don't)

But I didn’t want to wait anymore, I was almost done.

So I made a guess.

And all went well.

Until I saw a post.

No. It can't be.

The truth is right in front of me, all i have to do is slow it down.

goddamnit.

#also christophe holds one shoulder higher than the other awwww #he has so much detail for a man that appears twice #HAHAHAHAHAHAHA i was laughing so hard writing that last part holy shit #most of this is just the sash chronicles tbh. #it turned from me talking about making him to me dramatically retelling the story of the most miniscule part of his outfit. #and his boots arent even right because i thought his canon ones were ugly #also i was totally right in giving him a slight mullet #south park bigger longer and uncut #south park #sp christophe #ze mole #christophe delorne

[straycalamities]

Oh my okay I've got several... no I've got plenty of questions abt Truffula Flu lol

So... I'll ask all I remembered I wanted to ask, I hope it won't be too much..

1. Why guns aren't allowed in camp Entre? Maybe I skipped few posts, but I didn't see explanation for this one

2. About zombie mutations. Is they're really become stronger or is it just Rocky and Entre become weaker cuz of their illnesses?

3. Swags mod said that Swag would probably leave camp and die somewhere in quite place, while trying to survive. Why would he leave people that he cares about? Im a little bit dumb and don't exactly understand his planned ending 8(

4. There was a moment when One-ler tried to convince Bitter to put him out of his misery, but he escaped that. And I was curious, if he actually killed him then, would Entre blame himself for that? And if so, would it be worse then he blamed himself when he killed Bitter by his own hands?

5. After Rockys planned death, would Swag blame Entre for this? I mean, emotionally shocked, blame him again about this apocalypse stuff, that Rocky wouldn't die if he wasn't infected and etc.

I hope I made myself clear cuz I dunno how to put some questions ughh😭😭

And again Im sorry if its too much questions!

PHEW THAT IS A CHUNKY LIST. i love it

1. guns are loud and the infected are drawn to loud noises so if you shot a gun you’d be ringing the dinner bell basically. i feel like maybe we touched on it directly? but if i’m wrong it’s probably bc it’s a common thing brought up in zombie apocalypse stories so we might’ve assumed ppl just Knew why none of them used or wanted to use a gun

2. they do become stronger! i actually have a whole list of mutations (and more can be added as ppl come up with them! it’s open lore basically)

i made a whole google doc explaining the actual truffula flu and the symptoms, risks, etc (content warning for if you’re sensitive to medical discussion?? i don’t know how to word it but i wrote it like ur typical online disease info page. also content warning for zombies bc. it’s entirely abt zombification.)

rocky and entre being weakened definitely didn’t help their situation but yes. it’s mainly bc the spiky zombie is faster and stronger than ur typical sort

3. this is kinda hard for me to answer bc i’m not the one who originally wrote it. i don’t rly know why it was planned for it to go like that. i guess out of irony? i know the original plan was for swag to be the sole survivor at the end, but that kinda clashed w other plans so it was changed. so maybe this was the compromise to that

i will say tho that. things had been discussed since that post was made and his story goes differently than was broadcasted. howso? you’ll just have to see :)

4. yes, entre still would’ve blamed himself because ultimately: this is all his fault. regardless of who dies how or where. they wouldn’t be in that situation if it weren’t for him. especially if it’s connected directly with the infection. especially if it’s right in front of him where he can’t ignore it

he wouldn’t have been AS devastated by bitters death if he weren’t the one that had to kill him tho, because the thing is: that was the first time entre had directly killed someone who was still “alive” (unless i’m forgetting some obscure shit i did or said idk it’s been over a decade) and not only that, it was someone who was still his friend despite what he’d done? and even more layers: he had worked so hard to get bitter to come out of his shell prior to the infection and actually be his friend and then this happens. and he has to be the one to end it. bc he was pressured into it

so honestly entres descent into immense self-loathing and all that would have been Very different from how we saw it if someone else had taken care of bitter

5. nah i don’t think swag would’ve like actively started pointing fingers at entre again at that point. like deep deep down swag can’t ignore that this IS entre’s fault and this WOULDNT have happened if not for his mistake, but…swag realizes in the story that it’s not gonna get them anywhere if he keeps holding on so hard to those facts. like if he keeps berating and belittling entre as payback for everything what’s actually gonna get better for that? nothing. all it does is give him temporary catharsis and even that gets cheaper and lasts less time every time he does it

entre wants to fix things so earnestly and tries and swag sees that and wants to help because obviously he also would like this to be undone or at least, cured. and they can’t help each other if they’re at odds. and so even if it’s really hard on him to lose rocky like that, i think at that point it’s just chalked up to “this bitch of a situation” and not “entre did this”

not forgetting the fact that at that point, entre is going to mean a LOT to him because of how their relationship has deepened. so he’s not gonna turn on one of the only ppl he has left

thank you for the questions!! 😊

#durachokmp3 #asks #truffula flu #entre #survivialswag

[that-thing-that-feeling]

here’s the Google translation of it behind the cut!

The young British actor is the new global ambassador of Phantom Perfume Rabanne, a fragrance with which he acknowledges feeling quite identified. Since he became known globally with Stranger Things, this actor so physical and intuitive has come to represent a kind of generational idea of glamour as incontestable as it is far from orthodox canons. We wanted to talk to him about fashion, creativity and David Bowie.

A room (hotel room?) Ramshackle, a mattress without blankets and many vintage televisions tuned in to unusual channels: these are the ingredients of the new Phantom campaign, Rabanne's robotic perfume, for which the brand has counted on Charlie Heaton (Leeds, 1994) as an image and global ambassador. The young actor, whom we all met thanks to the series-phenomenon Stranger Things, has been gaining an interesting career over the last few years, appearing in such interesting films as No Future or The Souvenir Part II (both in 2021). But what was your previous relationship with a brand that defines you, in a press release, as an electrifying presence and a call to shape the future? It will be better to ask himself.

I was familiar with Rabanne before working on this campaign," Heaton acknowledges, "but only as a perfume brand. When they offered me the possibility of being their ambassador, it was when I began to know more about everything there is to know about them, their history and their values. I became a big, big fan of their clothes, their accessories and, in short, everything they have done over the years. I think I was really impressed with what they came to represent during the sixties, which I think is incredibly cool. That was the moment when I fell exhausted, and it's been great."

Directed by filmmaker and photographer Matt Lambert, the new Phantom ad invites us to a most suggestive nocturnal universe, as its protagonist explains: "The campaign plays with two concepts that seem very powerful to me when they are united: Paris and the night. Together they create something beautiful, because we all know that the city of Paris has a different energy when the sun goes down. The name of the fragrance also seems very evocative to me: Phantom. I'm still trying to guess what it can mean!"

What does seem to be clear is that Let's Dance, David Bowie's song that serves as a leitmotif for the entire campaign, "should be considered one of the best in history. It would have to be on all the lists! During the shooting we didn't stop listening to it in a loop, so part of that energy is present in the images."

A familiar face

Since Stranger Things was placed in our lives seven years ago, Heaton experienced a transformation overnight. Suddenly, the young interpreter was a celebrity who, due to his unmistakable features, was going to be very difficult to go unnoticed. How have you lived through that whole process? "I think I have a very good relationship with the fans. I especially notice it when I'm traveling, and you have to keep in mind that, due to my work, I travel a lot to different parts of the world. I have been to Spain many times, for example, but the truth is that most of the time I spend it between the United States and my native country, England."

I am aware," he continues, "of having appeared in a series that has been seen so much in so many parts of the world has made me a recognizable face wherever I go, which gives me an opportunity to meet very different people. I'm lucky, because it has been a genuinely positive experience in most cases. It has allowed me to live very sweet moments with the fans, so I can't complain."

Apart from meeting new people and traveling, Heaton declares that "my greatest source of admiration is, I would say, to see the people I admire work. I also love discovering a new movie, or just having conversations with my friends. I love being able to talk to them about acting, confess to them what my desires are within this profession and listen to theirs. So I would say that these are small day-to-day inspirations."

Before dedicating himself full-time to acting, Charlie Heaton was going to be a musician. In fact, he was in a rock group (as a drummer) and then joined another psychedelic, so we talked about something more than a hobby. "Many people know that my two great creative passions are acting and music," he confesses to us, "but lately I have also gotten into ceramics (laughs). Yes, it may have become a passion, although I still don't know how important it's going to end up being... At the moment, I'm very excited about it, so we'll have to wait and see."

Fashion too, of course," Heaton clarifies. "It has always played a great role in my life, I have always loved being able to express myself through the clothes I choose to wear. But I find it strange to talk about this, since I would never go around considering myself a stylish person... I don't think so, but at the same time I do know that I am able to appreciate good taste and good style in general."

As for whether or not he follows some style routine, the actor is more ambivalent: "It depends on what I'm going to do at all times. Or where do you plan to go, then it is likely that you will not follow any routine of style per se. For me, the great thing is when you do these things for yourself and only for yourself, instead of to go to a gala or impress someone. Dress well just for you, because you feel like it. But no, the truth is that I usually wear comfortable clothes in my day to day... A lot of worn jeans. I would tell you that this is my most emblematic garment."

We can almost visualize it with them as he moves to the rhythm of Bowie on some Parisian street.

#obvs since a google translation will have lots of errors

[og-danny-dorito]

[ ᴡʜᴀᴛ ꜱᴏᴍᴇ ᴏꜰ ᴛʜᴇ ᴊᴊᴋ ᴄʜᴀʀᴀᴄᴛᴇʀꜱ ᴡᴏᴜʟᴅ ɢᴏ ᴀꜱ ꜰᴏʀ ʜᴀʟʟᴏᴡᴇᴇɴ (ᴡɪᴛʜ ᴘɪᴄꜱ): ᴘᴀʀᴛ 1 ]

ᴀ/ɴ: SPOOKY MONTH BE UPON YE

ᴛᴡ: none

| ɢᴏᴊᴏ

more like goHOE

this absolute slut either goes in the most revealing outfit possible or the stupidest outfit possible. no in between

you know those shitty outfits you find on amazon that are like way too overpriced? yeah he's rich so it doesn't matter

probably goes as either a greek god or a digimon character tbh

either way he looks good and it's infuriating

| ʏᴜᴊɪ

bro 💀💀💀

have mercy on him pls he's kinda stupid

he originally wanted to go as ghostface cause like, he likes horror movies and all that but as soon as he figured out junpei was going as ghostface he decided to ditch the idea (cause he's nice)

instead, he decides that going as sukuna so he could scare the shit out of everyone

also because its easy and all he has to do is put on a kimono

only sukuna is WAY to into the idea

he's so into it that he agrees to behave for the night just so he can get a kick out of people trying to figure out whether it's yuji or sukuna talking

they switch every few hours so that yuji can shovel candy into his mouth tho

(go follow the linked cosplayer on insta, her stuff is really cool!!)

| ᴍᴇɢᴜᴍɪ

ya'll ever seen those aesthetic sheet ghost things on like pinterest n shit?? like with the glases and the skateboard and- yeah yeah you know

he didn't really want to put effort into it because he thought it was stupid, but after getting pressued by gojo to "have fun" and "participate" (🙄) he eventually gave in

he does the absolute bare minimum after a five minute google search and somehow still looks cool

gets a lot of compliments on his costume tho, so he guesses it's worth it

| ɴᴏʙᴀʀᴀ

nothing.

NO LMAO jk shes not a square. she still dresses up and is willing to physically fight anyone that shit talks her for it

kinda basic but she usually just does some variation of a zombie every year

she WAS gonna be a vampire but... you know

ends up going as a pirate because she can't really think of anything else, but looks cool so it's fine

she puts in extra effort to make sure it fits correctly and all that before just deciding to do a closet cosplay, and it ends up looking cooler than the original costume she based it off of

| ᴊᴜɴᴘᴇɪ

you can't tell me this dude doesn't have a full ghostface costume that he wears every year. because you're wrong.

not only does he have the full ghostface costume he actually put EFFORT into it

he's been adding more and more to the costume every year so he can make it seem like it's different (it's not), so it kinda just looks like an elaborate ghostface cosplay by now

it looks cool as fuck though- better than the other ghostface-ers out and about

(its just this but better sorry KDJNFDJ)

| ɴᴀɴᴀᴍɪ

he's a grown man. why would he dress up for halloween.

...gojo made him go to a sorcerer's only halloween party thats why

nanami RELUCTANTLY goes, and ends up going as a ghostbuster because he thinks its amusing

sorcerers are basically ghostbusters, right? it only cost like 20 dollars at target and its the only thing that fits his tall ass well enough to be comfortable, so he just goes with that and calls it a night

| ᴛᴏɢᴇ

mime

basically means he doesn't have to explain to random people why he doesn't talk, and on top of that he thinks the whole vibe is really cool looking

the pic below is only an ounce of what i meant but he looks really cute in the costume so its fine

overall rlly sweet, doesn't have any pre-rehearsed mime acts or anything but does do cool tricks with is curse to entertain kids so its fine

#halloween headcanons #jjk #jjk headcanon #jujutsu kaisen #jujutsu kaisen headcanons #jujutsu sorcerer #jjk megumi #jjk nanami #jjk sukuna #jjk itadori #gojo saturo #jjk gojo #jjk maki #jjk nobara #jjk todo #jjk toudou #jjk junpei #jjk toge #jjk headcanons #jjk imagines #jjk panda

[spooniechef]

Emergency Calories - Potato Salad (0-1 spoon)

I've been largely out of spoons lately, with weather changes, unexpected absences at work and resulting overtime, and all associated pain flares making most things difficult to impossible. I'm feeling better at the moment, so the next few posts are going to involve how I've survived the last few weeks. Because aches or no aches, we still need to eat, and UberEats is too damn expensive for all the time (especially with gluten intolerances).

Now, I've spent a good portion of my adult life fucking up potato salad. Somehow, I thought it was just ... potatoes, mayonnaise, done. Except ... not quite, apparently, because the mayonnaise would always seem to separate and it was never quite right. So I eventually started looking up recipes to find the common thread that makes other people's potato salad work when mine didn't. Took a good bit of searching, but I finally found it: vinegar. Or lemon juice - something acidic, anyway. As well as adding a certain amount of tart zinginess to the potato salad, it also seems to keep the mayonnaise creamy and smooth even when refrigeraged a few days. So while I got recipes from a lot of sources, I've never strictly used any of them, preferring to figure out the best way to do it by guess and by gosh so I can just thow everything together without thinking about it too much. So I'll give a basic overview and some notes for potential additions to jazz it up a bit. The great thing about potato salad is its versatility. Plus, potatoes are relatively cheap.

Here's what you'll need:

~2lbs (or 1kg-ish) potatoes

~1 cup mayonnaise

~1-2 tablespoons vinegar

Additions to taste (see notes)

The easiest way to do this in terms of potatoes is use baby new potatoes, cut into quarters. If you're doing anything larger, you probably want cubes about an inch square. Making sure the pieces are of uniform size is helpful. And I don't know how it is in other countries, but if you're in the UK, get more potatoes than you think you'll need. Our produce has been shit lately, and it's pretty standard to have to cut away bits of yick or just throw whole potatoes away.

Here's what you do:

Chop your potatoes and put them in to boil. Once boiled to reasonable softness (not mashable-soft, but not too firm either), drain and leave to cool and dry.

In a separate bowl, add the mayonnaise, vinegar, and whatever else you're putting into the dressing.

Add potatoes and fold until everything is fully covered.

Serve immediately and/or put in the fridge for later.

As I say, these are largely approximates because I measure it all by eye at the moment. It's pretty easy to get the hang of. Basically you want just enough vinegar to not have the mayonnaise swimming but enough to suit your tastes. And obviously you can jazz it up to suit you - here's some things that have been suggested in various recipes or just sound nice:

Hard-boiled egg

Crispy bacon bits

Dijon mustard

Chunks of dill pickle

Herbs and spices in general (paprika is usually suggested, as are chives, and obviously salt and pepper to taste, but I like adding onion salt, garlic pepper, and a little bit of celery salt)

Onions (I prefer green onions/scallions, but thin-sliced red onion can add some nice colour)

Honestly, play around with it, because potato salad is wonderfully versatile. Googling for recipes showed me that there are as many potato salad recipes as there are people, so I just left it at the absolute basics as a sort of a blank canvas to experiment on.

Potato salad lasts about five days in the fridge, and can be a meal in itself if done right, so it's great for a source of emergency calories. Enjoy!

(Oh, and side note: if you are gluten intolerant, do not try this as pasta salad. I tried to make pasta salad by the same principles and the dressing was fine but gluten-free pasta is disgusting cold. Even the good kind of gluten-free pasta. Sorry, fellow gluten-intolerants; we're going to have to stick with potatoes.)

#the spoonie chef #recipes #spoonie essentials #emergency calories

[bowlingforgerbils]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

Thank you @gretchensinister for tagging me!

How many works have you written for AO3?

40 works! I have some older stuff on fanfiction.net.

What’s your total word count?

Do you know that this is the first time I've ever looked at the Statistics on my AO3 account. I didn't know I could see my total word count! Anyway it's 149,665.

What fandoms do you write for?

These days it's pretty much Good Omens. But I have not forgotten my first love, Rise of the Guardians.

Top 5 fics by kudos

"Jackpot", "He Followed me Home", "I wear your grandad's clothes, I look incredible", "Under the Mistletoe", and "I Promise to Take Care of Him."

The first and the third one are Pacific Rim fanfics, the fourth one is a Good Omens fanfic, and the second and fifth one are my two-parter about Charlie and the Scientist, a crack pairing in the It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia canon.

Do you respond to comments?

Yes. It's my way of showing appreciation that someone enjoyed my silly little story. And I'm always happy to answer questions or talk about the characters. <3

What’s the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Umm.... I don't really do angsty endings... I guess Shakespeare in the Park? It's not a happy ending, anyway.

What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Again, this is hard, almost all I write are happy endings! Maybe Co-Habitation, because it ends with Aziraphale and Crowley living in the South Downs, which is my Good Omens endgame.

Do you get hate on fics?

No, although when I originally started posting When You Wish Upon the Moon on fanfiction.net, someone whined at me in the comments about not wanting me to ship Pitch Black and Sandy together. Thankfully, AO3 has a great tagging system, so I assume anyone reading my stories knows what they are getting into beforehand.

Do you write smut?

Yes! Not lately. I should rectify that. :3

Do you write crossovers?

Yes, occasionally, if the mood strikes me.

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I'm aware of.

Have you ever had a fic translated?

I don't think so... I have a vague memory of someone asking, but that might have been on fanfiction.net.

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

No, but many of my Rise of the Guardians fanfics wouldn't be what they are without the collective world-building of the blacksand community.

What’s your all-time favorite ship?

In general? Probably Aziraphale and Crowley. That I've written? Probably Pitch and Sandy.

What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you will?

I have a Good Omens pirate AU in my WIP folder that I lost steam in writing, but never say never.

What are your writing strengths?

I think I'm pretty good at dialogue, and also creating a plot that gives characters a chance to express themselves and hopefully experience some growth.

What are your writing weaknesses?

Moving the characters around in the physical space. I don't know if it's because of my generally weak spatial skills, but imagining where the characters are in the environment and each other is really hard! Fighting scenes in particular give me such a headache.

Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language?

It's not something I do, personally, except for a word here and there for flavor. I doubt that adding several lines of badly Google translated dialogue is going to add anything beneficial to my story.

First fandom you wrote for?

The Chronicles of Prydain, although I didn't know it was called fanfic because I was twelve and this was before the internet as we know it existed. It was about a self-insert fairy who was Doli's girlfriend. I liked how grouchy he was!

Favorite fic you’ve ever written?

It's a tough call, but probably He Followed Me Home. Not only because it was so much fun to write, but because I've received so many comments about how this story is a "comfort fic" for them, something that they read and re-read to feel better, and if that's not the highest compliment that I can receive as an author, then I don't know what is.

I tag whomever wants to do this!

#use your words

[slutmoansdaddygrowls]

BOOM!

That was all I heard before everything running on power at home went off. I was trying to set up some lamps, but like every time I attempted to do some craft work on my own, I screwed up. Needless to say I had no idea what to do and where the general power switch was and as a newly-comer in the neighbourhood, I was too shy to ask for help from anyone around the corner. They might thought I were an idiot.

The choice I had been left with was to find an electrician who could immediately come to spot and fix the problem. Luckily, I had some cash at home to pay him.

I started browsing on Google and entered a website where I could find all types of technicians with the help of personalised filters. As I was scrolling down, I caught a profile that seemed interesting.

Ben Woolwich

Electrician for all type of devices and circuits

Address: 1147 Melrose Street, East Cotton Fields, GA

I was pretty surprised because his address was exactly next to my house (I was at 1149 and he was at 1147 Melrose Street). He was also available online and had a chat section for texts, so I decided to communicate through it.

-Hello, Mr Woolwich! My names Joey O'Hagan and I'm currently facing a power cut at my new home, which is right next to your location at 1149 Melrose Street. Is it possible to come help me now or maybe later? I'd be very grateful if you did!

-Hello Joey! I'm a little busy at the moment, but I hope you can wait for about 15 minutes. Is that okay?

-Of course, take your time!

As he promised, Mr Woolwich arrived in exactly 15 minutes. The bell rang, I opened the door and saw a guy much taller than me, in his late 40s or early 50s, almost bald, black, with a shy yet very cute smile. A short beard and mustache added extra appeal to his face. All in all, I found him super attractive.

- Hi, is this Joey?

-Yes. Come in, Mr Woolwich.

-No need to keep it formal, just call me Ben, he said and patted my shoulder, still smiling. That gave me goosebumps.

-Alright, Ben, let me show you what's going wrong, I answered and led him to the living room where I was trying to set the lamp that blacked out my whole house. He checked it out and then went to see the power switches. After a couple of minutes, he told me:

-Looks like you can't install these lamps at this home. They need high voltage to run on and the power of your house can't support them. Where did you buy them from?

-Amazon, but I think they are distributed to the market by a European company.

-Now it all makes sense. You see, Joey, power voltage of facilities in Europe is double as high as the ones in the US. You need to buy your lamps from the country, because it looks like you were scammed.

I felt such a moron for not knowing that.

-Oh my goodness! I guess that's what I get for being irrelevant to crafts.

Ben laughed at my line.

-Don't worry, lad. Nobody's born knowing every single thing. I suppose you don't have any other lamps to put, do you?

I nodded negatively.

-You're very lucky though because I have some at my car for such cases. I'm bringing them right now.

Not much later, he had come back and installed every lamp at my home's rooms.

-I don't know how to thank you, Ben, I said after he finished.

-Don't say that, son. That's my job.

I got my wallet out of my pocket to pay him, but he cut it off.

-No need to. Take this as a welcome to the neighbourhood.

-But I need to pay off for your help. Maybe want to have a coffee? I mean, if you aren't busy.

Ben thought a bit about it.

-Well, I don't have anything else, my day is over. Okay, let's have that coffee. I'd like an espresso.

I was so happy he accepted my offer. In fact, it would be a shame if I didn't express my gratitude for his assistance. I quickly made us coffee and sat at the kitchen table.

-Tell me about you, Joey. What do you do in your life? He asked.

-I just graduated from college and now I work as a nurse at a hospital in Atlanta. I'm originally from Indiana, but just recently settled here for my job. What about you?

Ben sipped his coffee before responding.

-Apart from the fact that I'm an electrician, I'm also a local. I've lived most of my life here, but I used to live in Boston until 35. Then I came back to Georgia, got married and divorced a few months ago. My wife was never really interested into marriage and family, she was a woman of career. We weren't getting along lately for this reason, so divorce was inevitable. Now she lives in Vegas.

-I'm sorry to hear that. Hope it was for the better.

-It was indeed. And neither of us has hard feelings. My only regret is for not having realised it earlier. I feel like we both wasted each other's years.

-I understand.

-And you? I guess such a nice guy can't be single. He changed the subject. To be honest, I never feel comfortable enough to tell other straight guys about my sexuality and personal life. You know, it's the fear of homophobic reactions. But somehow Ben didn't give me this vibe. I was a little nervous and felt my face burning and blushing. My heart sank when he called me nice with the deep, rough voice of his.

-We have something in common, I started saying. I too recently broke up.

Ben was looking at me fully interested.

-Well, he basically was my boyfriend since high school. We applied at the same college so we could be together. I was so in love with him until I caught him in our room with one of his co-players at the tennis club, who had also become his best friend.

Every time I had to talk about Aaron, I would get overwhelmed. Ben must have noticed that and came closer to comfort me. Contrary to what I feared of, he was absolutely understanding and made me feel safe to talk freely.

-Well, at least you got rid of this asshole. You can now find someone who will treat you how you deserve.

-Thank you, I said, looking him in the eyes. I had just realised we had come very close and he was technically hugging me, with his one arm around my shoulders. I felt our breaths crashing on each other. I couldn't hold myself anymore. My scrotum was getting larger as I felt his muscles on my thin body, as I smelled his sweat. But I knew I stood no chance. He told me he was married to a woman.

I looked instinctively at his buldge. To my surprise, it was getting bigger.

-What are you looking at, boy? You want to try it? He asked.

I had so many things to think about. Was he attracted to men too? How did we reach at this point? Did he like me? Did I really want this?

I skipped all those questions, didn't answer and just kissed him. Gently at first, but then he wanted it more harsh. He pulled me to his chair, sat me on his lap and rolled his tongue into my mouth. He then started sweeping my blonde curls with his manly fingers. The tension between us had gotten dangerous and I had a feeling there was no way back.

We stopped our kiss and he took off my shirt. He started leaving a kiss trail from my neck all the way down to my slim, hairless belly. He then got topless and raised his armpit. I leaned in to sniff and lick it -it smelt so strong and sweaty. Later on, he raised me in his hug, since I was easy to carry in his muscles, and we took things to my bedroom.

He tossed me in the bed. While he started softly, he was getting more aggressive with time and I loved that. He climbed above me and trapped me under his ripped, hunky body. We removed more of our clothing, until we were left fully naked. We kept on kissing passionately, until he turned around, leaned and started licking my hole.

-So tight, warm and moisty, exactly how I like it, he said and spat on it. He then dipped his tongue in it and devoured it like ice cream. I was already moaning and panting. Didn't know where he had gotten those skills, but I didn't mind to know either. He was doing it so well that I just sat there and enjoyed.

-To keep you entertained while I devour you little boy pussy, I'll give you something to play with, he said. Next thing I knew, he had turned his feet to my head and swang his swollen, elongated and nine-inches enormous cock around my face. His head bumped my cheeks and nose, until I finally grabbed it in my mouth. I took big gulps of it down my throat, without choking and despite the fact I couldn't fit it.

-Jesus Christ, you're killing me, boy. I haven't had a blow like that in ages!

I felt so proud he appreciated my service. I also gripped my fingers around his penis, to add extra pleasure. I played along with it a little and rubbed gently his cock vein, as he massaged my asshole with his tongue and lips and he smacked my buttcheeks.

After a while, I sensed his first precum on my tongue. I then took out his dick and jerked it, focusing on the head.

-Alright, Joey, enough with the appetiser. Let's get to the main dish, he commanded. He instantly turned around and we kissed for a bit.

-Spread your legs, little faggot, he growled as he dragged them on his shoulder.

-Yes, sir, I said. I opened the gap and he slid two fingers inside my arse.

-I'm making some extra space for my monster cock inside here. Don't wanna cause you a sore cunt.

I didn't say anything since I was gasping. I couldn't process how pleasant this experience felt.

-And you should be grateful about that. I could cause a big damage to your small boypussy but I choose to make it easier for you. Show me your gratitude. Say "thank you, daddy".

-Thank you daddy, I repeated moaning. I felt so vulnerable and weak next to his presence and his hand around my neck didn't help me either.

-Good boy, he whispered to my ear. He then took out his fingers and put his rock hard, beast manhood in it.

Despite the fact he had stretched my butthole with his fingers, his dick still felt too fat and I felt pressure down there. I can't say I disliked it though.

-F-fuck, Ben, it's huge and thick!" I moaned through my gasps.

-Shut the fuck up and take it like a good little obedient slut!" he roared.

-Yes, sir.

-Good boy. Take it all in like a real man and stop crying.

-Okay, daddy, I mumbled quietly, then approached his face and kiss his lips hungrily.

He then got up, pushed me away, laid on his back and I kneeled around his legs to ride his horse. He wrapped his strong hands around my waist, slapped my buttocks twice and I kept on clapping my cheeks on his nuts.

Ben started rubbing my nipples with his fingers. They progressively got harder and slightly ached, but the worst thing was that I was feeling too close to finish and it provoked my orgasm. That basically made me shout very loudly. Ben must have understood that and he decided to change position. He laid me on my belly and laid his body on my back.

Now my weakness and his dominance brought my orgasm even closer. I kept on shouting and moaning, so Ben decided to gag me with his manly hand.

-I must keep you quiet, son. We don't want to annoy the neighbours, do we? He asked, smiling in a nasty way.

I nodded a No since he had shut my mouth. He carried on fucking me mercilessly, drilling my hole, making it his property. Oh God, he made sex much better that most guys my age.

Finally, I couldn't hold it anymore. He had already hit my G spot and suddenly, I sensed a river of hot, thick liquid pouring out of my cock, which was squashed below my body. The bed turned wet and warm below my abdomen. The sweet pain of orgasm spread all over my groinal area. I felt so loose and light.

Ben realised I was done from the tone of my mumbles behind his fingers. He stopped his pace for a moment, took some deep breaths and pulled out of me. He kissed my cheek and neck and then demanded that I turn around and open my mouth. Of course I did as he pleased. He began jerking his meat in front of my face and his head tickled my tongue.

-ARGH, AUGH! He growled and soon a white line rolled out of his penis, its content dripping on my tongue and being shot aroung my lips. I took a last suck of his head and then he curled up next to me to cuddle.

-Did you like it? he asked me first, still panting. I was laying on his sweaty chest.

-I loved it, daddy, I answered and kissed his boop. He stroke my hair and kissed my forehead.

-Happy to know. By the way, I wish I could do this everyday with you.

-Well, looks like now that I moved in the area, it will be easy to do it anytime, neighbour! I joked and he laughed as we gave a kiss on our lips.

#gay #gayerotica #smut #daddy k!nk #18+ only #mxm #homosexual

[yourlocalnicknackkinnie]

Character Bingo: Nick Nack (HP:MS)

@dolly-royal @omggypsyesmeraldathings-blog (I know you asked for Riley too but I'm making it a separate post since its the same character :3 )

Alrighty lets begin (It's gonna be very long because I've got a lot of things to say about him)

They are so cool looking

I gotta admit, he looks very cool. Even tho some prople say he looks like James Charles (Which I STRONGLY disagree) I love his design. I personally like his clothes, the man has drip. Heck, I literally painted a white blazer for a cosplay but now I just wear it when I'm not in cosplay anymore. I also like his facial structure since it gave me a challenge to draw him before but now I've gone used too it. (I can go on and on)

Everyone but me is wrong about them

Ok, so this is just a little joke (I do believe in other people's headcanons about him) but I would make this joke of "As a Nick Nack Kinnie, he would defiantly do that" if there's something that I think he would do.

Wasted Potential

Ik hes in the prequel but he could have more potential in the first game too (Since his model was already made). I think that Nick could've been in the tea party with Mortimer and Riley at the end instead of Kathy. (IDK but stillll)

If they were real I would be afraid of them

Ok, maybe a little startled but still- I mean, he's a puppet that wants a human as his host. But I headcanon that when you say that he's your favorite, he'll stop, cry and just be nicer to you. (Since he doesn't want to harm a fan)

They are deeper then they seem

for some reason I feel like there's something more about Nick that we don't know. The fact that he might have the urge not hunt for Owen and his urge to do it is strange but maybe there's more context in the game when its realesed.

They got done DIRTY by fans

So one time I tried to look how far the fandom has got. So every fandom has R34 art so I decided to type it in on google and OH I REGRET MY DECISION. I found a Nick Nack one- (IDK if that counts tho but still)

Didn't get enough screen time

This applies for the first game. like- we only see him in the shadows and that's it.

I want to carry them in a handbag like a tiny dog

Well kinda, I don't own any handbags but I wanna put him in a back pack instead with him poking out of it. If i had a Nick Nack puppet i would put him in there, let him poke out of it and go out with him like that for aesthetic purposes (And probably comfort reasons as well).

Nothing I like about them is technically canon

Another joke one. I do like things that are canon but I like to come up with headcanons to make me like him more than usual.

Why do they look like that

I don't mean his Midnight show ver. I meant his model that was supposed to be in the first game. What happened to his eyes? Where his is little beard thingy? (I headcanon that the eyes are supposed to be a mechanism that was added in later. like Puppet contact lenses I guess. it was later added because it wasn't in the blue prints so it was just a last minute idea Owen came up with)

Im mentally ill about them

Help, my mind is all about him now- send help (JK)

Wow... they are LITERALLY me!

Yep, that's me (As my username says it) I relate to him a lot. from my interests to maybe personality. heck I made a list of it and there's a lot of things I kin him that its scary. Ex. liking arts, having mood swings, being a tea person, likes to sing (the difference is that I think my voice sounds horrible) and more things-

They've never done anything wrong in their life <33

Ok, Ok maybe he has done some thing wrong in his life but at least he has the urge to not kill us-

So that's all for now. I could make a headcanon post about him on here (Pls reblog or comment down if you want something like this cause I have a lot of headcanons for Nick and plus I love making this kinds of posts)

#hello puppets #nick nack #hello puppets midnightshow #character opinion bingo #headcanon