#can you tell I hated the first episode and won’t even watch the second one

[beauspot]

Thoughts on my second watch of Good Omens 2

i heard the fly buzzing in my first watch but didn’t know why and now i know

Maggie my sweet darling angel baby i love you

Aziraphale turning their car yellow

crowleys “no more dying” in extreme scottish.

Disposable Demon i’ll save you from these awful people i promise 😭

Aziraphale’s little smile when he says “smitten” to Crowley

i wonder if crowley was especially hurt because aziraphale seemed to be able to forgive gabriel who tried to kill him but can’t seem to forgive him being a demon.(still seeing all of this as a metaphor for internalized homophobia, like aziraphale knows he’s not the perfect angel he wants to be and he’s projecting his feelings about that onto crowley)

I can’t believe we got an actual ball. like pride and prejudice, bridgerton ball.

the beautiful score that started playing when aziraphale brought the chandelier down

i didn’t even realize that when they walked in the outfits changed. mrs sandwich made me realize(also i love her)

Nina being the only one to question the weird magical shit Aziraphale and Crowley do sends me so bad.

Season 2 took everything i liked about the first season (aziracrow, queer subtext, gay people, archangels, and beelzebub) and expanded on it

The adorable smile on Aziraphales face when he asked Crowley to dance 😭 he’s so pure(i should have known something was up, everything was going too well)

Crowley saying i won’t leave you on your own and Aziraphale saying i know 🤒

why isn’t aziraphale able to miracle nina and maggie??

crowley and mrs sandwich flirting. too cute

crowley saying he’s neither nice nor a lad.

crowleys little run in heaven when he’s following muriel

maggie giving the middle finger to the demons and laughing in their face when they tried to belittle her. queen

defensive aziraphale is so badass. just because he’s soft doesn’t mean he can’t stand up for himself or the people he loves

the random guitar solo in the final episode theme is so bizarre to me. why is it there?

ahh the raining hearts symbolizing crowleys vavoom plan!

crowley’s heavenly outfit not being white but “light grey”

the relief in aziraphale’s voice when crowley came back 😀

also him mumbling about the halo like he did with the sword 😭 but he sure loves to boast about the things he’s done right to crowley

aziraphale and crowley doing magic together has the power to set off alarm bells in heaven and they barely tried, they’re just in sync

saraqael was such a good addition to the cast.

crowley smiling at aziraphale going off on the angels and demons

“where beelzebub is, is my Heaven.” 🥹

the little knowing look after crowley mentions alpha centauri

the way they just interrupted michael’s speech by leaving 😭

i think that aziraphale was about to ask crowley to move in but that’s my opinion

the look the metatron gave crowley is so strange. i don’t like that

“JUST US. NOT YOU.”

“You’re not helping, angel.”

the softness in aziraphale’s voice when he talked about making crowley an angel again? how can you hate him! he thought he was doing the right thing!

also the miscommunication these two have is completely out of hand because crowley asked aziraphale if he said no and aziraphale hadn’t given an answer AT ALL to the metatron. the metatron told him to take his time. he went back to tell crowley the news first.

crowleys confession makes my stomach hurt. the way his voice broke when he said “we’ve spent our existence pretending that we aren’t.”. the way he had to force himself past his anxiety to tell aziraphale he wanted to spend eternity with him? fuck.

the way aziraphale tells crowley to come with him. like and through all of this they are losing each other, oh my god.

“i need you!” god aziraphale punch me in the face next time why don’t you?

i feel like in all this anger towards aziraphale a lot of people are ignoring that he put himself out there too. he was telling crowley he needed him just like crowley was

“no nightingales.” FUCK YOU GAIMAN

the way aziraphale touched his lips after. dear GOD. someone get michael sheen an emmy

seeing aziraphale struggle against his wanting to kiss crowley back and his fear and wanting him to come back to heaven further supports my internalized homophobia analogy

also even knowing the kiss was going to happen because of the spoiler it still didn’t quell my shock. nor did it ruin the scene, i think it actually surprised me more because it did not happen how i thought it would.

side note i saw some people saying they thought the kiss was going to be a cop out in some way. like a body swap or as a joke and i don’t really know why?

it just occurred to me that both aziraphale and crowley thought the other one was just doing that thing they do where they say they won’t help, or they’re on their own but they eventually come back not knowing that the other was completely set on these plans they had. this wasn’t like armageddon or saving gabriel.

the second coming…of jesus…

crowley cutting off “a nightingale sang in berkeley square”...i’m gonna jump

this being the ending for the next 3-4 years. oh.

#good omens #good omens 2 #good omens season 2 #good omens spoilers #good omens 2 spoilers #muriel good omens #nina good omens #maggie good omens #good omens beelzebub #aziraphale #a z fell #crowley #anthony j crowley #aziracrow #ineffable husbands #ineffable bureaucracy #archangel fucking gabriel #archangel gabriel

[farfromstrange]

Useless | Matt Murdock x Reader

Pairing: Matt Murdock x Reader

Masterlist

Summary: Mental illness can be a cruel bitch sometimes. Thankfully, Matt Murdock is patient and he always takes care of you, even when you try to shut him out.

Warnings: ANGST, emotional hurt/comfort, Mental Health Episode, allusions to self-harm and suicidal thoughts, post Season 3 (spoilers ahead), not proofread

A/n: to anyone following me, you already know why this is being posted. I wrote this while I was depressed. I hope it helps some of you. I won’t say any more because there’s no words to be said about this. It’s sad but there’s comfort in the end and some wisdom I’ve gathered. You’re welcome!

I’ve put whatever I have left to post into the queue. I’m going to bed now. I wanted to post this beforehand because I’m proud of what I’ve accomplished for the first time in a while. I’ll see you soon, but probably not tomorrow… like I said, baby steps. My profile’s been busy enough for today and me too, for that matter. Take care of yourselves and please, if you ever feel down, don’t hesitate to talk to someone!

He knocks three times. He has a key, so he doesn’t have to knock, but he does, and after that he even rings the doorbell, but you can’t bring yourself up to get off the cold bathroom floor.

“Sweetheart,” his gentle voice rings out. There’s a small thud, it sounds hollow and quieter than his insistent knocks just a moment ago. His forehead collides with the wood of the front door and the room falls silent. “I can hear your heartbeat, y’know, so I know you’re not dead, but it’s still distressing to not hear from you for days,” he says. “I’m gonna open the door now.”

He finds you in the bathtub, but there is no water and you’re still wearing your pajamas from two days ago. You’re dry, so you haven’t showered with your clothes on, and overall it seems as if you’re just using the bathtub as a makeshift bed rather than an attempt to cool yourself to death.

Matt sighs deeply. “You know how worried I was?”

Your mouth is dry, your head fuzzy and you can’t possibly speak with your throat this tight.

Control is a fragile concept. You might be in control of your life for one second, and then the next everything's falling apart. Your kind descends into a downward spiral and once you’re going down, breaking out seems like an impossible task to do.

It’s times like these where life feels like it’s just happening to you and you have to sit back and endure it. You physically can’t take the reins back, no matter how hard you try. You’re paralyzed. It’s your head that’s screaming for you to act, but all you can do is sit back and watch in horror as you drive yourself off the road.

“You’ve been shutting people out again, haven’t you?” He rhetorically asks. “Because when I asked your friends, they said they haven’t seen you in days either, they’ve just read your texts, and they were short and snappy and that’s not like you, baby. Or it is, but only when it’s getting bad again. I was afraid this might have happened, I just didn’t want to accept it until I couldn’t bear it anymore. I had to check up on you. Glad I followed my gut.” He says the last part under his breath, and the relief mixes with the worry in an expression that makes you want to throw up. It’s sickening how much he cares, and the world doesn’t deserve him the same way you feel like you don’t.

The truth passes right by you. All you can think about is what you keep telling yourself. You’re useless, worthless, a nuisance and everyone hates you, so you need to erase yourself from the narrative to make the world slow down and make everyone just shut up. Even now you want Matt to shut up because his voice is like the sound of a million needles dropping on the floor of a hollow room all at once.

The worst part is, you know you should feel guilty for caving in on yourself but you can’t feel anything but this nagging feeling of anger and frustration eating away at your heart. Even his voice makes your fists clench. At least the deafening quiet has kept your nerves from fading into nothing and triggering that toe-curling feeling of overstimulating that sits right at the top of your brain and makes every last muscle twitch in a way that causes anger to seep from your pores, he can smell it.

He can hear it in your heart and your breathing too, he knows you’re not okay, and he knows his constant questioning only makes the fire that is burning you alive worse. It’s been like this before and it will continue happening, he knows. He knows that and he accepts you with all of your flaws and all the problems you might have. He loves you, why should he leave you for something that’s not even your fault? You haven’t quite grasped the concept of his devotion for you yet, but he’s determined to prove it to you.

He kneels next to the bathtub, shedding his suit jacket along the way and placed his chin on his forearms as he leans forward. His glasses land on the floor and his smile is so lopsided, it makes you frown for a second. He’s trying his hardest to make you smile with the way his sightless brown eyes try to find yours, and his teeth glisten in the bathroom light as he grins at you.

“What is it this time?” He doesn’t question your behavior, he just wants to understand. He knows you better than anyone else, after all.

You let out a prolonged breath. Even his voice has you on edge, but you suppose it could be worse. He’s not as annoying as your own voice when you answer, “Life.”

You sound so drained, his features soften even more and he reaches out to brush the greasy hair out of your face. There is wine in your breath, his nose picks up on that instantly, and you desperately need a shower, but he doesn’t tell you that because he knows you already know that. He’d never judge you for it. He’s happy as long as you’re alive, the rest can be figured out at a later time.

“Are you drunk?” he asks.

“Lightly buzzed,” you say.

The alcohol was supposed to take the edge off, but it’s only made you more nervous.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“No.”

“Do you want to take a shower?”

“No. I need the world to be fucking quiet, that’s what I need.”

You flinch at your own tone, but he doesn’t seem fazed at your snappy nature. You swear it’s not personal. You would have apologized a million times if you hadn’t been so tired, and he really doesn’t seem to mind. He simply nods, acknowledging your wish.

“Okay,” he says. “Can I take you to bed then, at least? Your back probably hurts. How long have you been here?”

Your eyes flutter closed. “This morning,” you tell him.

He sighs wearily. “Of course, you have. Can I take you to bed, sweetheart, please? I’ll make sure you’re properly compressed so you won’t get triggered by new sensations, I promise, just… let me do this for you. The bathtub is no place to cry, you’ve told me that.”

You did, once.

And you couldn’t possibly protest, even if you tried. Your back does hurt and you’re more tired than usual. You haven’t required this much sleep in a while, but your mind and body are both exhausted and you feel as if you’re going to faint if you keep staring at the white bathroom tiles. Matt’s presence has knocked some sense back into you, bringing reality to the forefront, but the alcohol and shed tears keep your mind fuzzy to the point you’re not sure if you can feel your legs.

Matt senses your hesitation. Ever the caring boyfriend, he reaches his arms out to lift you out of the tub. “C’mon,” he says.

“Why aren’t you angry?” your voice cracks as you ask the dreaded question.

He has you up in his arms in an instant. “Why aren’t you yelling at me?”

His lips press to your temple, a silent answer as he carries you into your still-dark bedroom.

“Matt,” you try again, but he stops you.

“I’m just glad you’re okay,” he says, wrapping your fragile body in blankets and mountains of pillows. “It’s okay to feel like shit sometimes, and if you need to shut people out to feel better, that’s okay too, just try telling them how you feel before you disappear or they might start thinking you hurt yourself.”

“I don’t do that anymore.”

He swallows hard at the emphasis. “I know, sweetheart, but it’s hard for the people who love you to differentiate.”

You pout, “I’m sorry.”

“No,” he shakes his head, “don’t say that. It’s not your fault. Here, scoot over.”

He takes off his shoes and the rest of his clothes until he’s left in his boxers. You do as you’re told and let him into bed with you.

“You want to cuddle or is that too much?” he asks.

Considering your skin feels hot and on fire while your flesh is freezing, your heart contracting in pure agony at even the thought of being touched, you shy away and shake your head, the tears finally starting to flow. He smells the salt in the air, mixing with the salt of your sweat.

You hide your face in the pillow. The sob that passes your lips sounds broken. “I don’t know what’s wrong with me,” you admit. “Everything just… sucks.”

“I know. I’m so sorry, I wish I could help you.” He doesn’t touch you. He respects your boundaries.

You shiver, curling further into the pillows. His warmth is there, but his hands aren’t. Still, it’s enough to make your body vibrate with the heaviest sob you’ve let out in a while. He wants nothing more than to hug you, but he doesn’t. Instead, he sits by your side and lets you cry it out in the company of someone who understands how you feel because he has them too, the bad episodes, the times he just wants to shut everyone out and sleep in his bathtub. It’s because of that he isn’t angry or upset with you for doing what your mind thought to be right at the moment. He understands better than anyone else ever could, and it somehow makes the tears flow even faster and harder to the point you can’t help it anymore. You ignore the smoldering fire in your chest and curl around his arm; it’s all you can do without breaking apart, but you need him while not needing him, and a touch you can control is better than something forced on you. His pulse drums against your fingers resting around his wrist and it manages to calm your own in the process.

“I want a different brain,” you eventually choke out. “It’s not fair God gave me the messed up one. I don’t want it. I don’t want to be me. I just want to be someone else, just for today.”

The human psyche is treacherous and easily turns your entire mindset against you.

He sighs, reaching up to pat your hair. “I’m sorry,” it’s all he knows how to say. He’s sorry that you feel this way, that you feel guilty for being you, and that there is nothing he can say or do that would make the monster shut up.

His presence has to somehow suffice, telling you you’re not alone anymore and that you’re not the failure you make yourself out to be. He helps you heal while at the same time, he makes you better. You hate him for being so kind, for making you love him so deeply you can’t possibly hate him. It’s confusing, all of this, your heart and your feelings, but most importantly your thoughts.

The tears die down eventually, your tear ducts empty and your mind and body tired from screaming at each other. Your hold has tightened around his arm, your eyes squeezed shut and the occasional sobs are all that are left from the unplanned breakdown.

Matt still has his hand in your hair, brushing through it until your heartbeat has slowed and you can breathe again.

You feel obligated to apologize. “I’m sorry,” you say. Of course, he shuts you down.

“It’s not your fault,” he reminds you. “And I’m always going to be here to tell you that. I love you, sweetheart, and you’re worthy of my love. You’re worthy of all of my love. It’s okay to be depressed, it’s okay to take what you need and it’s more than okay to take a break.”

“Then why do I feel so useless? It’s been like this for a year now and I can’t… I don’t know what to do anymore.”

“Everyone reaches their breaking point eventually. I did, back when I was still living in the church basement. But I crawled my way back out of hell. You know how long it took me, so why put yourself down for taking your time now?”

He makes a valid point, which is infuriating. You whimper. “I hate that I love you so much.”

He chuckles. “Right now you do, tomorrow you won’t.”

“I know.” Your voice cracks again. “God, I’m so sorry. My head’s a mess.”

He leans over to kiss your hair again. “Well, thank God I’m here now to take care of you,” he says. “Tomorrow, I’ll clean up your apartment and make sure you eat something. You don’t have to shower if you don’t feel ready, but it might help. But we’ll see that tomorrow, okay? For now, I want you to rest. I’m right here if you need me.”

The sleep catches up with you shortly after he’s done talking, his hand scratching your scalp while he whispers Sweet nothings into the night, distracting you from the hellish thoughts your mind has conjured up for you. It’s just you and him, his voice a lullaby that you’ve grown accustomed to, and with Matt by your side, you finally fight your way into a dreamless sleep.

He’s your solace, your lifeline, your lifesaver, and he’s always there, even when you don’t ask him to. He’s the comfort you need, your common sense and the sun that lights up your darkest days. Without him, you’re sure you would have been lost, swallowed by the tide of severe mental illness and the cruelty that is life itself.

You love him and he loves you, the perfect pair, both damaged but so good to each other, the bad matters a little less when you’re together.

#matt murdock #tw: depressive episode #matt murdock x reader #gender neutral reader #daredevil #daredevil x reader #mental illness #reader insert #matt murdock angst #hurt/comfort #matt murdock fluff #it’s queue bitches

[kess-in-the-perthchimzone]

Little details in episode 9

Hopefully you know the drill by now — once a week I get a little wine tipsy, rewatch the most recent episode, and point all the little things that newly stick out at me:

Sailom’s silent “what the hell” is hilariously funny to me. He’s going along with what Kang wants with minimal input, which is very sweet, but the first chance he gets where his face is hidden, he can’t hide how insane he thinks his boy is.

To give him a little bit more credit than I have been lately, this IS a more open exchange of feelings than Sailom would usually give. He turns it into a joke, but he is slowly starting to share more with Kang.

No thoughts, head empty, just Sailom’s affectionate smile when Kang says he has to wait until tomorrow to be his sugar daddy!!

I adore this little exchange. I wish they’d gotten to play it out more. It’s a nice way to show how different their backgrounds are without it being a whole THING.

No thoughts, head empty, just Kang’s affectionate smile at seeing Sailom fall asleep!!

Another really great exchange. Sailom NEVER talks about Kang like this, but you can tell how much more frustrating he finds this than anything that might come up in tutoring. He could sympathize with Kang being cavalier with money when it was seemingly unlimited, but not in a situation like this, when they truly need it.

I don’t even LIKE kids and this is the cutest thing I’ve ever seen. @thirstkanaphan has fully convinced me that the actual best life path for Kang is coach

Kang LOVEEEES calling Sailom his boyfriend and I love it for for him

I have been married a long time and can attest that this is one of the most true to being married scenes I’ve ever seen on TV

Something important happened with this line and I need someone smarter than me to unpack it

The way Kang immediately upgraded their hotel room when he got more money. Incredible, no further suggestions.

This gives me radiantly happy in episode five Sailom vibes, which is my favorite Sailom!! It’s so wonderful when he turns off his brain and just enjoys the finer things he gets to experience via Kang

This flop of despair (and blue balls) when Sailom closes the curtain on him. Kang, I adore you.

I have hated (HATED!!) how virtually every other BL I’ve ever seen has handled the shyer, virginal character whose boyfriend pushes them to be more physical. But oh my gosh Kang pulls it off. Because first of all, all he really ever is trying to do is make Sailom blush and he usually keeps his distance after he gets the reaction he’s looking for

And second, because what he does after Sailom agrees to let him stay here, is immediately ask this question. My precious boy. Did you just want to stay close so you could open up about your feelings?

After Kang talks about how he should sell the bike back, Sailom gives him the club look. And Kang gets to see it!! Only then does he try to close the gap between them. Sailom is admittedly giving him come hither eyes

How Kang puts himself in the way when the angry guy starts talking about beating up Sailom. He goes on to say “I WON’T LET YOU”. So much (probably unwarranted) bravado, I’m obsessed

Meanwhile, Sailom, who has actually lived on the mean streets, is like “we need to get the hell out of here”

The motorcycle guys didn’t even take the money! Is that worse or better, I can’t decide?

I know I’ve talked about this previously but the fact that Kang’s worst nightmare was Sailom getting hurt again and then HE caused Sailom to get beaten up by throwing that punch is gutting (but actually in some ways Sailom willingly chose to be beaten because he stepped in between the men and Kang. They protect each other!)

I’ve come around to believing Sailom is telling the truth here. In part because Sailom never ever lies, and in part because I’m pretty sure Kang leans over and watches him type the message

Obsessed with the way that immediately after he’s satisfied that Kang has calmed down and that he’s ready to go home, Sailom instantly reverts to the person you know he wanted to be the entire trip to Korat

Once again they have an entire wordless conversation with their eyebrows. Married.

The way Kang’s wearing white pants so you can really tell in the reflection how he has his knees bent on either side of Sailom’s body when Sailom flips them in the love scene 👀👀

#dangerous romance #dangerous romance the series #kanghansailom #little details series #Kess babbles about dangerous romance

[rose-tea-and-strawberries]

Oh, but that one episode where Mortimer was lying about being the club critic and he demanded to have some cute girls to sit with him. With Yuu working there, Minnie and Daisy weren’t enough for him and wanted Yuu to sit with him. Cue the entire Fab 5 and all the patrons of the club putting all stops and not caring if the reputation of the House of Mouse goes downhill for Yuu’s sake. (Of course, that won’t happen because Lumiere quickly revealed that he was the critic)

Fun Fact: This was actually one of (if not the) first episodes of HoM episodes little me watched so this is going to be fun.

So since Lumiere got held up (I'm 100% convinced that it was because he was so excited for his job as a critic he somehow accidently caused a mishap in Adam and Belle's castle and now all of them ended up being late because Mrs Potts and Cogsworth forced him to fix it. Adam and Belle were especially upset because they had brought a few books from their library they wanted to lend to Yuu - Chip even pitched in a few of his favourite tea bags).

Now Mortimer, the scourge of the earth, the repulsive rodent himself. Yuu very much dislikes him and she practically likes everyone. When he first enters enters the club, the Sensational Six do their very best to make sure that neither of them get within each other’s sight but Yuu being Yuu thinks that he might not be as bad everyone tells her because hey, her friends at NRC didn’t exactly have the best reputation before they encountered The Power Of Love Friendship™. 

She immediately understood why everyone hates him three seconds after meeting him.

Thankfully she’s got overprotective work dads and mums that always have their eyes on him and her so she never has to stick around. Even when they are busy we’ve got the patrons ready to call on her the second she enters within six feet of Mortimer.

Also Pete may be an awful and downright cruel jerk but he's a jerk with standards. Even he hates Mortimer and finds it disgusting that the mouse makes advances on people that are clearly uncomfortable with him. I remember in the Christmas special, when he trapped Minnie under mistletoe and tried to force a kiss on her, Pete quickly took Minnie's place and kissed him instead. Yeah he tries to close down the club in dastardly ways but tricking a young girl like that? Pal, even he draws the line.

So whilst Mortimer is enjoying the fact that he can do whatever he wants and no one can deny him, he decides that it’s finally time to get to know the girl that everyone seems to love so he demands that Yuu sits at his table.

Mortimer: *smirking as he leans over his table on his elbows* You know what, doll? Hows about ya come sit here with me as well?

*record scratch* *entire club goes silent as everyone turns to stare at Mortimer and Yuu, the latter of who’s smiling yet looks both surprised and uncomfortable* *insert Kill Bill sirens*

Mickey: *looks straight at Mortimer with a forced smile, paws clenched, and completely tense with anger* Yuu, go to the staff room.

Yuu: But what about the-

Minnie: Don’t worry about anything, sweetie.

Daisy: Yeah, honey, you go take your break. We’ll handle everything.

Meanwhile Goofy is holding a very angry, loudly yelling Donald back from attacking Mortimer there and then. Yeah, he was angry that his girlfriend was forced to sit with him but Daisy is an adult and a very capable duck who is more than ready to prove how much of a spitfire she can be - Yuu is his kid a girl that doesn’t have that kind of power (to be honest though, if she did attack him, not only would the entire club provide alibis for her, he’s sure that the villains would throw her a party). 

Mickey makes it very clear to Mortimer that whilst he loves the club and would do anything to protect it, it’s not worth it if Yuu gets hurt. He’ll put on a show, alright, but if Mortimer even thinks of even looking at Yuu, then not even he can control what happens.

The patrons also collectively agreed that if the House of Mouse does get closed down, they’re more than happy to fund another one anyway.

Everyone’s 1000% more alert than usual. The animal characters all have their claws out and are balefully glaring at Mortimer whilst the adult humans make sure to keep an eye out for Yuu no matter where she is. Lots of the clients are parents so their protective instincts are on overdrive.

For the entirety of the night, Yuu finds herself seated at a table with Maleficent, Jack Skellington, Oogie Boogie, The Horned King and frickin Chernabog himself. Forget scary dog privileges, no one in their right mind would even think of approaching someone who's being guarded by the forces of evil, the powers of hell and the embodiments of fear.

I feel like some of the ladies would feel especially protective. Tiana was a black waitress in the 1920 so she’s definitely had her share of workplace harassment, Esmeralda’s been hit on quite a few times on men that have no concept of the word ‘no’ and same thing with Megara.

Meg: This is why I hate men.

Hercules: You do 🥺

Meg: All men except you, wonder boy. Now are you gonna punch him or should I?

You think the villains would be bad when it comes to people upsetting Yuu? Just wait until you see what her ‘big brothers’ would do to the poor unfortunate soul that hurt her.

To make up for the mix-up, Lumiere gets the castle staff to perform ‘Be Our Guest’ for Yuu. Even after the whole fiasco, everyone makes sure that neither of them crosses paths again. The clients don’t really interact with him but both the villains’ and heroes’ sidekicks make sure to remind him that he’s on everyone’s hitlist blacklist

Also Daisy gives Yuu a box full of pepper spray ‘for emergencies’

#house of mouse au #asks #twst yuu #fem yuu #twisted wonderland #twst

[stranger-fanfiction-n-things]

CHAPTER 2: THE WEIRDO ON MAPLE STREET

This is an Original Character fanfiction. All Stranger Things characters and content are owned by Netflix and The Duffer Brothers.

a/n: This part is heavy. A lot of things are happening. Nancy and Diana's friendship dynamic will be tested throughout the season. I wanted to make this pool party as realistic as possible. In watching this episode, I understand Nancy's want to fit in, but it's at the expense of Barb in my opinion and I wanted to showcase how that feels through Diana. As a dancer, I hate when after finding out I am a dancer, people tell me to dance...it makes me uncomfortable. It's not a skill that is always on for me. The move Diana shows everyone is called a Scorpion (Rhythmic Gymnastic Style).

P.S. This is what I picture Diana wearing to the pool party.

Warnings: Sexual implications. Blood. Peer Pressure.

Word Count: 3511

Masterlist

PART I || PART II || PART III || PART IV || PART V

HARRINGTON RESIDENCE

When Steve said he was having a party, I never expected to be outside in his backyard, sitting on a lawn chair freezing to death. I shiver wrapping my arms around my knees. I have been here for over an hour and have done nothing but sit by the heated pool watching the water. The definition of ‘party’ was as lost as I felt. Tommy H attempts to throw Carol in the pool. She screams trying her best to escape his hold. I lean against Barb savouring her warmth and rest my head on her arm watching everything unfold. Nancy sits in a lawn chair beside Steve. Barb and I were long forgotten once we arrived. I am too cold to care.

“I thought parties were primarily inside the house.” I mumble. “What kind of party is this?” 

“A stupid one.” Barb responds with a sigh.

“All they do is smoke and drink. Where’s the food?” 

“Eating isn’t in style, I guess.”

I peer around Barb’s shoulder keeping an eye on Nancy and notice she is on her second beer for the night.  I groan, feeling restless and stand up to stretch my legs. 

“Did you want to go for a walk?” 

“Where?” 

“I don’t know, around the pool.” 

Barb looks at the pool, wrinkling her nose in distaste. “No thanks.” 

I pout, but don’t question her and begin my walk. 

“Diana, where are you going?” Nancy asks. 

“I’m tired of sitting around. I’m going to walk around the pool for a bit.” 

Nancy smiles, her blue eyes seem glazed and a little out of focused. “Okay. Just don’t leave.” 

“I won’t.” I respond, no matter how much I actually want to leave. 

I stroll along the edge of the pool thinking. Steve Harrington throws a lot of parties and I’m most certain the whole school has been to Steve’s house at least once in their lifetime. Which meant Steve’s parents weren’t home often. I look at the towering house and the expansive backyard. I don’t know what it’s like to be an only child, but I do know how it feels to be lonely even with others around. My gaze lowers to across the pool. Nancy smiles at Steve; they’ve been talking since we arrived leaving Barb and I alone. I don’t look at Tommy H and Carol, knowing they’re all over each other, stealing kisses and soft giggles. Instead, I look at Steve. Really look at him. His impressively beautiful hair, the cigarette behind his ear, the forgotten can of beer in his hand, the way he looks at Nancy. Like he…enjoys being around her. 

I tilt my head to the side. This is the first time I am privy to observing how Steve interacts with Nancy. He seems more…genuine and real. Not this superficial, arrogant persona he puts on at school or when he’s with Tommy H and Carol. I admit my perception of Steve Harrington is based on how others view and talk about him. He’s the boy we watch walk away. The Big Man on Campus. The Casanova. A glorified asshole. But in being in his house for this brief moment and seeing how he is with Nancy separate from Tommy H and Carol…maybe I had it all wrong and Steve Harrington isn’t that bad. 

A gust of wind blows past and I hug my jacket close to me. I am so cold I start to jump up and down. Sauté. Sauté. Sauté. I jump higher landing through my feet. Glissade assemblé. Glissade assemblé. I continue to jump from petit allegro to grand allegro and after a few minutes I begin to practice the Gargouillade.

“Do you ever sit down?” Tommy H shouts. 

I almost miss what he said and stop jumping. From across the pool, Steve, Nancy, Barb, Tommy H and Carol stare at me with expressions ranging from awe to concern. 

“She’s practicing.” Nancy says. 

“For what?”

“The Nutcracker showcase next month.” 

Tommy H winces. “Sounds painful.” 

“What the hell is a Nutcracker?” Steve asks. 

“The Nutcracker,” Nancy corrects. “And it’s a two-act ballet by Tchaikovsky.” 

“Bless you.” Carol jokes, grinning. Tommy H kisses her temple.

I roll my eyes, putting my hands on my hips and pace back and forth in efforts to catch my breath. Sweat trickles down my back and I finally feel hot enough to take off my jacket. 

“Diana got one of the lead roles in the second act.” 

“Nancy.” I warn, marching to the other side of the pool. 

“What? It’s a big deal and you should be so proud of yourself!” 

“I am but…” I squeeze my jacket. Stop telling them my business! 

“How long have you been dancing?” Steve asks me, sipping his beer. I am taken aback by his question.

It’s the first time Steve is talking to me directly and not through Nancy. The first time I feel like he acknowledges me enough to talk to me despite the circumstance being forced upon me by Nancy. It takes me a moment to respond. 

“I-I was two when I started,” I stutter, looking anywhere but his face. “It’s how I met Nancy."

“You’re a dancer too?” He directs his question to her.  

“I quit last year.” 

“Why?” 

“I just didn’t want to dance anymore.” 

“Why not?” 

“I don’t know. I just didn’t…” she shrugs, finishing the last of the beer. Nancy wipes her mouth with the back of her hand. “Diana is gonna go pro one day.” 

I feel like I’m going to explode. Steve looks at me again and this time I meet his gaze. 

“Pro? Sounds like sports.” 

“Dance is a sport.” I interject. 

Steve raises his eyebrows, though his eyes tell me he doesn’t agree with me. I’m not surprised because it’s the common stigma surrounding dance. Becoming a professional dancer is a one in a million chance. There are so many odds to win against. Making money is dependent on the opportunities you get and with whom. It’s not as stable as a regular 9 to 5 and the training is extensive and strenuous that most don’t make it. 

“Diana has the grace, strength and flexibility.” Nancy continues. “Her lines are perfect; her feet are beautiful.”

“Lines?” Carol questions. 

My nails dig into my palms. 

"The way she moves is aesthetically pleasing. She can do crazy things with her body.” 

“Is that so?” Tommy H smirks. 

“Diana, show them!” 

My face feels like it’s on fire. Everyone is looking at me now. I shift from side to side wanting the ground to swallow me up. All this attention on me is too much and I feel like I can’t breathe.

“No, no. I-I can’t.” 

“Please, Diana?” Nancy begs, clasping her fingers together. 

I want to tell her to stop. I hate being asked to dance outside of a studio. It makes me feel like a clown at a circus, ready to entertain and Nancy knows this. 

“I would love to see these crazy things you can do with your body.” Tommy H’s tone suggests something else entirely. 

“Me too!” Carol adds, leaning back on him. 

I shake my head, tucking a loose curl behind my ear. “It’s too cold.” 

“Just a kick then!” Nancy offers. 

“Yeah, just a kick, Diana.” Tommy H adds, smiling devilishly at me.  

“Nancy, I don’t think—” Barb begins. 

“Yeah, show us!” Carol interjects, smiling at me. 

Tommy H cheers aloud while clapping obnoxiously. I glance at the faces in front of me. Barb looks as uncomfortable as I feel and I can tell she’s trying to help me out of this situation but she is overshadowed by Tommy H and Carol. Steve looks surprisingly hesitant and Nancy’s hopeful face stares encouragingly at me. I close my eyes and sigh, placing my jacket on the empty lawn chair beside Barb. Nancy squeals in excitement as I perform some last-minute stretches to warm up my hips and back. 

Lifting my left leg up and grab the outer side of my foot with my left hand. I begin to push my back foot towards the sky as high as I can which is pretty high, considering its already by my ear without much effort. I turn my elbow outward so it’s pointing forward and in front of my head. I lift my other hand and grab my ankle with my right hand and meet my left hand with it. When I straighten my leg and pull my leg forward, the back of my thigh touches my head. I pull until I am in an over split. 

“Holy shit. How is that possible?” Steve exclaims. Nancy claps proudly while Steve stares at me wide eyed and confused. 

“That’s disgusting.” Carol says. 

“What are you?” Tommy H adds. 

I immediately let go of my leg and stand straight. They didn’t have to be so mean. 

“Okay, that’s enough.” Barb snaps, holding my jacket out to me. I take it from her, sitting in the lawn chair beside her. 

The “party” resumes as if nothing happened with Tommy H, Carol and Steve all standing finding someone or something else to entertain themselves with. Nancy watches Steve’s every move, trying to be discreet but failing. Tommy H and Carol stand near the pool and Tommy H tries to throw Carol inside again. Carol screams at the top of her lungs. 

“One, two, three.” 

 “You’re such an asshole, Tommy.” Carol giggles. 

Steve comes back with a can of beer in his hand. I can’t see what he’s doing until he quickly opens the can, putting his mouth on the side. I cringe thinking about all the germs on that can. He chugs the beer in a matter of seconds, dropping the can on the ground. 

“Is that supposed to impress me?” 

Steve plops himself on the lawn chair. The cigarette behind his ear, dangles from his lips. He looks at her feigning confusion.

“You’re not?” 

Of course, she is. 

“You are such a cliché; you do realize that?” 

“You are such a cliché.” Steve responds, reaching for a lighter on the side table. He lights his cigarette and inhales. “What with your grades and your band practice.” 

“I’m so not in band.” 

“Okay, party girl.” He hands her a can of beer and the blade, challenging her. “Why don’t you just show us how it’s done, then?” 

Barb and I look at each other. That would be Nancy’s third beer for the night. Any more and she’ll get sick. I close my eyes praying Nancy won’t do what I think she’s going to do. Barb shakes her head. 

“Okay.” 

Nancy standing up caught the attention of Tommy H and Carol. 

“You gotta make a hole at the bottom—”

“I got it.” 

“Yeah, she’s smart, you douche!” Tommy H laughs, crushing a beer can against his head. 

“That explains so much.” I mutter under my breath. Barb snorts, smiling. 

Nancy pokes a hole in the can of beer and quickly opens the top before she begins chugging the beer. 

“Chug, chug, chug! Chug, chug, chug, chug, chug!” 

I’d be impressed, if I weren’t so taken aback by the way Nancy was acting. She drops the empty can on the floor, stumbling slightly. Tommy H, Carol and Steve all cheer and whoop for Nancy who curtsies in thanks. 

“Barb you wanna try?” 

Barb perks up. It’s the first time she’s been addressed the entire night. “What? No. No, I don’t want to. Thanks.” 

Nancy pouts. “Di?” 

“Absolutely not.” 

Nancy looks at Barb one more time. “Come on.”

“Yeah.” Steve encourages. I squint, shaking my head. 

“Nance. I don’t want to.” Barb hisses. 

Nancy ignores her putting another can of beer and the blade in Barb’s hand. “It’s fun! Just give it a shot.” 

“Nancy. She said no.” I interject, sternly. I can’t believe she’s forcing us to do things we clearly don’t want to do. 

“Okay. Fine.” 

Barb stands up in the centre of the circle. I look up at her feeling on edge about what was going to happen and what could happen. Barb isn’t equipped to poke a hole in the can. She doesn’t know how. The silence is so loud, it’s awkward and I want to grab Barb and tell her to sit down. Barb mumbles to herself, fiddling with the blade. She presses into the can, but the blade slips, slicing through her hand. Barb flinches, dropping the can and knife on the concrete. 

“Barb!” I shout, rushing to her. I hold her wrist in my hand to inspect the damage. Blood oozes out of the cut in her palm, trickling down her wrist and my fingers. “Oh my gosh.” 

“Gnarly.” Tommy H laughs. 

I glare at him, letting go of her wrist. “It’s not funny.” I snap. 

“Are you okay?” Nancy asks, her eyebrows etched with worry. She seemed to have sobered up a little. 

“Yeah.” Barb says. 

“Barb, you’re bleeding.” 

“I’m fine.” Barb replies, her voice is shaking and I know she’s fighting back tears. Barb looks at Steve. “Where’s your bathroom?” 

“Oh, it’s…it’s, uh, down past the kitchen to the left.” He stands up escorting her back to the house. 

I look at my hand and the dry blood sticking to my fingers and quickly grab my jacket from the lawn chair running after them. I can’t stand to be around Nancy right now. 

“I’m coming with you, Barb.”  

I hold Barb’s hand under the cold water in the downstairs bathroom. Steve left five minutes ago leaving me and Barb alone. The air feels thick and heavy around us as we stand in silence. I know Barb feels embarrassed about what happened and that’s the reason she’s not talking. I understand completely and allow her the time to process what had just happened. Removing Barb’s hand from the water, I quickly soap my hands and rinse them before closing the tap. I quickly dry my hands against the hand towel and tend to Barb. I take her hand and inspect the cut. 

“It’s not that deep which is good.” I comment. 

“Yeah.” 

The cut begins to bleed again and I take a heap of toilet paper and quickly wrap it around her finger tight to stop the blood. Barb watches me work. I tell her to hold the wound tight to stop the bleeding. Barb nods her head and sits down on the toilet seat staring at nothing in particular. I sigh deeply and crouch to her eye level placing my hands on her knees. 

“Are you sure, you’re okay, Barb?” I ask, softly. 

Dark brown eyes look at me. “I’ll be fine.” 

I frown, growing upset with what happened by the pool. “I don’t know what’s up with Nancy or why we’re even here. Did you see how she was acting out there? I felt like I was in a circus and you, Barb. Your hand.”

“She wants us to be her guardians. So that’s what we’re going to do. Guide her and make sure she doesn’t get too drunk and do something stupid.” 

“Like sleep with Steve Harrington.” It wasn’t a question. It was a fact. I shake my head. “We can’t stop her from doing that when she clearly wants to, Barb. Nancy can deny all she wants, but she wants to be here. She wants to get drunk and she wants to sleep with Steve.” And it doesn’t explain why we need to be here. 

“I know…” Barb says solemnly.

Neither of us say anything for a moment. I am lost in thought, drawling circles on Barbs thighs. If Nancy would just admit how much she likes Steve, Barb and I wouldn’t be here right now. Tonight, left me wondering where did my best friend go. That person out by the pool is not Nancy, it’s a version of her I don’t know nor want to know. She didn’t notice how uncomfortable Barb and I were tonight which is so out of character, I don’t even…I shake my head again, biting my lower lip. 

“Why are we here, Barb?” I ask quietly. 

“Because Nancy wants us to be here for her.” 

“Then why do I feel like…a handbag. An accessory in all of this? Why do I feel like she doesn’t want us here?”  

Barb doesn’t answer. I sigh and stand up feeling completely drained. I want to go home. I want to take a shower and sleep. I want to do anything but be here. I hear footsteps and laughter followed by Nancy and Steve’s voice. Barb and I look at each other before springing into action. We are scrambling out the door in seconds rushing towards the grand staircase. 

“Nance. Nancy!” Barb calls. 

Nancy pauses, hugging the towel against her face, looking at us.  Steve continues to walk the steps, not bothering to look back. I observe Nancy. She is drenched from head to toe with bits of mascara gathered around her eye. 

“Where are you going?” Barb asks. 

“Nowhere. Just upstairs…” she hesitates to respond finding the right words, “to change. I fell in the pool.” 

“Why don’t you go ahead and go home. I’ll just get a ride or something.”

My jaw drops. Go home? Go home? She begged us to come and make sure she doesn’t do anything stupid, and now she wants us to leave? That’s all we ever wanted to do since arriving here. 

“Nance.” 

“Pardon?” 

Barb and I say at the same time. Nancy looks at us. 

“I said why don’t you go home.” 

“I know what you said, Nancy, but you asked us to be here for you.” 

 “I’m fine,” Nancy says with a hint of attitude. “You guys can go.” 

I stare at her for a moment trying to figure out where my best friend went. “Did we do something wrong? 

“No.” 

“You seem like you’re mad at us.” 

Nancy sighs, rolling her eyes. “I’m not mad at you guys. I can just tell you don’t want to be here so you can both go home. I’m fine. I’ll be fine.” 

Barb and I don’t speak for a moment. I’m too frustrated to say another word. I lied to my parents to be here. I lied to Mrs. Wheeler to be here. I wanted nothing to do with this and Nancy knew that, yet Barb and I were forced to be here, ridiculed and embarrassed. And Nancy doesn’t see any of it. She only sees Steve Harrington. 

“Nancy. This isn’t you.” Barb says, sadly. 

“I’m fine, Barb. Just go, both of you.”  

Nancy races upstairs without looking back. I scoff shaking my head. Unbelievable. I turn towards the door grabbing Barbs arm. 

“Let’s go.” I snap. 

I am stunned when Barb resists. She looks at me with sympathy and I immediately know what she’s about to say. 

“I’m gonna stay here…” 

“Barb, are you serious?” I exclaim. I don’t care how loud I’m being. 

“I know, I know,” Barb says pinching the bridge of her nose. “But I can’t leave her here.” 

“She just told us to go home and I don’t know about you, but I’m not staying where I’m not wanted.” 

“I just can’t leave Nancy here alone.” 

My chest feels hollow. What about me? I want to ask. Barb was supposed to be our ride home. With Nancy staying and Barb staying with her, I had no way of getting home. But I refuse to linger around while Nancy stays upstairs with Steve. I can’t call my parents; I’m not supposed to be here across town. I’ll get in so much trouble, I doubt I’ll be able to leave my house for anything other than school and dance for a long time. I can’t risk it. I look at the door behind me. The thought of walking home alone scares me and I wish Barb would leave Nancy and come with me. Be with me, like I’ve been with her when she cut her hand. 

My nostrils flare as I push down the tears brimming my eyes. No. This is your mess, Diana. You have to fix it. I swallow the lump forming in my throat and I stand straight holding my head high.  

“If that’s what you want to do,” I say quietly. “I’m going home.” 

“Are you going to call your parents?” Barb asks, eyes slightly wide. 

I shake my head, putting my jacket on. “I’m just going to walk.” 

“Walk!? Diana, c’mon. Just stay here—” 

“No, I can’t.” I say with finality. 

Looking defeated, Barb nods her head, pulling me in for a hug. “Be safe. Please.” she whispers. 

I hold Barb tight, breathing in her floral scent. Neither of us let go for a long moment and a part of me feels like this hug was a…farewell. I release myself from her hold and glance down at her finger. It’s still bleeding, drenching the white tissue paper a bright red. 

“You be safe too, Barb. Please find a bandage for your finger.” 

“Yes, mom.” Barb teases. 

I smile and it feels genuine. “I’ll see you tomorrow, okay?” 

#stranger things rewrite #black fem reader #stranger things fic #stranger things #dianasinclair #eddie munson x black!reader #steve harrington x black!reader #eddie munson x female reader #steve harrington x fem!reader #sinclair!reader #eddie munson fanfic #steve harrington fanfic #eddie munson x sinclair!reader #steve harrington x sinclair!reader

[wondergirl2007]

These five artists have inspired me to do art myself and I really admire their art ~ So I’m going to tell you about them and why they inspired me and they will even be tagged. If any of the artists that are in the list see this, then I just want to thank you for inspiring me.

5. Kika-ila

This artist is known for doing Total Drama art, and I was obsessed when I first saw her art! Her style is so freaking cute and I actually think her Total Drama Kids stories are better than Total DramaRama itself. I actually used to love Total DramaRama, but now not as much. I don’t hate it thought. I love Total Drama, but most YouTubers I watch that do TD content are leaving the fandom, like TotalDramaRicky and Noahh, which really does suck, but I can see why and they want to move on to other stuff. I really like the timeline drawings she did, and she even did it for FNAF (Five Nights At Freddy’s) too! FNAF is one of my favourite horror video game franchises, my favourite is the second one, which is actually a prequel! I didn’t even know that until a few weeks ago! But overall, Kika does awesome art and she deserves more attention!

4. thegreatrouge

I love this girl’s art. She’s known for doing art with rubber hose characters, like Felix The Cat, Oswald The Lucky Rabbit, Mickey Mouse and even Cuphead and Bendy! She has made a whole series called “Bendy And Boris And The Quest For The Ink Machine” and it’s amazing so far! The project is currently on hiatus right now, I’m not sure if she’s discontinued the comic and I really hope she hasn’t. I hate stories that are left on cliffhangers, along with “Two Sides Of The Story” which is a HTF comic by one of my good friends Emmy, she discontinued the story because she believed it was cringe. The art? It was cringey at first, but the art got better at around chapter 4. The actual storyline? Yeah, it was quite cringey actually. Can’t really blame her, but I actually did enjoy the story, I’m even doing a redraw of it and might even do a non canon continuation of it! I won’t do it for BABQFTIM, since there is already some continuations of that story. Rouge has also done a Cuphead In Wonderland project too which is pretty good too! Unfortunately, she’s been losing motivation to do art recently, which really upsets me. She’s an awesome artist, and I’d love to help her feel motivated again. Most of her art is sketched, or digital but without colour, but I can understand that colouring in art can take time. This girl is pretty good at art and she definitely deserves more motivation to continue doing what she loves.

3. The-Wallop-Cat-12

This artist mainly does Cuphead art, but she also does Sailor Moon, Splatoon and Mario art! Which is awesome, since I love all of those video games and Sailor Moon is my favourite anime. I don’t watch anime a lot, but my personal favourites are Sailor Moon, One Piece, Naruto, PPG Z, Yo-Kai Watch, Demon Slayer and Dragonball Z. Cuphead is definitely one of my favourite video games, despite how hard it can be. I got it for Christmas last year at it has been fun playing it. I also love VOAdam’s comic dubs of Cuphead Comics and he even did dubs for Wallop’s Cup Bros In Wonderland comics! I was working on a comic about it, but I discontinued it since I lost interest. I still love the idea of it though. Cuphead X Alice In Wonderland. I love Alice In Wonderland. There’s even some heartwarming comics she’s done with the the Cup Bros comforting each other that are real tearjerkers. I also really liked the Size Shifting Cup Bros comic she did. I like how Drama Days (a YouTuber I like) coloured in the comic too. I don’t know why, but I love a cartoon episode where someone becomes a giant. Don’t ask me why I love it, I just do. Probably because of Alice In Wonderland. Wallop is my favourite Cuphead artist, and she is very good at what she does!

2. ChaoChao0071

Oh my god, this girl… SHE IS AMAZING!!! I’m actually kinda jealous! Her art and animations are so damn good! She mainly does HTF content, but she also likes Invader Zim and My Little Pony. I love her crossover series with HTF and MLP “Everything Is Broken” and I like her Invader Zim series, “Not Your Enemy”. Looking back at when she started compared to now, she has been improving over the years! I really like her fanmade MLP character, Creepybloom. She’s such an amazing and interesting character. Chao’s voice acting for her is just splendid. (No pun intended cos there is an HTF character named Splendid and he’s my favourite character). I love villains that eventually turn good and realise their mistakes, like Sunset Shimmer in MLP: Equestria Girls and Vomitdid in Drama Days’ Splendid series. I also really love him. Definitely an interesting fanmade character. I also love her HTF OC’s Whiskers, Smokey and Holes. They are awesome concepts to EIB. Fun Fact, I actually didn’t like them at first when I first saw them in Part 12, but I eventually grew interest to them in Part 14, since we didn’t really see them in Part 13. Overall, this girl is AMAZING and I hope I’ll be able to animate like her one day. Her animation is so smooth and she is so skilful!

1. EmmyJeanBean

Emmy, if you are reading this, then I just wanna say… Thank you. Thank you so much. You are my best friend. You were the one to inspire me to do the art I do today. You have improved so much throughout the years, and I love every single art piece you have done. I follow you on DeviantArt, Instagram and Amino. I’ll make sure to follow you when or if I get Twitter. You are the reason why I do the art I do today. Everything about you AU makes me so curious and I love the way you made the characters and you OC characters are amazing too. It makes me wish they where in HTF too, like Angus, (Lammy’s ancestor) Samantha, (Splendid’s sister), Tammy, (Cuddles and Toothy’s kid), all of Cuddles siblings, everyone’s moms just all of your OC’s definitely deserve to make it into the show if it ever comes back. I’d love to to anything to bring HTF back. We can bring HTF back together. With all the fanmade stuff people are making, like Amensia, Nemao’s fanmade episodes, Drama Days’ Splendid series, EIB, etc, we can definitely make it possible since that shows that people still care about the show. Happy Tree Friends is my favourite cartoon and programme and I’d love to give it a revival. Let’s all bring HTF back to life, together. Emmy, you have actually inspired me to do some projects and art pieces, like your ‘Cannibal’ comic. It has inspired me to do a comic that I’ll be working on for the whole summer, but I won’t spoil it yet! I’ll keep it a surprise until the cover is out. I love so many of your projects like TSOTSS, Cannibal, Tammy’s Arc, Understanding Nolan, I’m Not Leaving and my favourite is A Stolen Heart, your Lifty X Splendid fanfic and my favourite HTF ship. Emmy, you are the best artist I’ve ever seen and nothing will change that. You art is so inspiring to me. You are the best.

And that’s them all! These 5 artists have inspired me to do the art I do today!

Kika-ila

thegreatrouge

TheWallop-Cat12

Pupster0071

EmmyJeanBean

NONE OF THE ART BELOW IS MINE! ALL CREDITS GO TO THE ARTISTS ABOVE.

#total drama #total drama island #total drama action #total drama world tour #total drama revenge of the island #total drama all stars #total drama pahkitew island #bendy and the ink machine #bendy and boris the quest for the ink machine #cuphead #happy tree friends #htf #htf fanart #thegreatrouge

[fitzells]

an unedited, unrequested steve blurb. set in episode 9 so season 4 spoilers below!

Your nimble fingers tremble as you sort through the piles of donated clothing, the plethora of sounds from the busy crowd swarming you from where you stand in the centre of the gymnasium. Your head is all over the place, fatigued and somehow simultaneously hyperactive as you try to piece together the mess of what had happened over the course of the last few days. The last few months. The last few years. All of the above.

Just vaguely, you can make out Steve’s voice; he’s standing beside you, constantly leaning over your body to reach towards the boxes of clothes cluttering the table beside you. Everytime he reaches over, you catch a waft of his cologne; it calms you. You’re not really sure why you can’t listen to him, why you won’t listen to him. He hasn’t done anything wrong, you’re not upset with him. You just wish that time could stop for a moment.

Eddie’s dead, Max is comatosed, the ground holding your entire town together was split open for reasons you can’t say out loud without sounding like a total maniac. Everything is a mess, a complete and total mess, and you can’t escape it. None of that is Steve’s issue, so why can't you just turn to talk to him? Everyone else seems fine; Steve’s still looking out for everyone, Robin’s still making quippy remarks, Nancy’s still as neat and put together as ever; even Dustin, who was forced to watch his new found hero die in arms only two days ago seems to be holding it together better than you. Why were you such a mess?

Sure, you’ve always felt as though you had a strong bond with Max. The urge to protect her from all possible forms of harm had been looming ever since you met her; she was your kid sister, blood or not. Eddie and you seemed to click upon first meeting, you never really knew him in high school; you wish you did. Even though you didn’t know the guy for that long, he might’ve been one of the greatest people you had the pleasure of knowing. He was a good person, and an even better friend. You hate that everyone’s formed their own opinion of him, you hate that he can’t defend himself, you hate that you can’t tell them the truth.

“Hey.” Steve’s jean clad hip nudges your own, eyebrows furrowed as he peers down at you. “You okay?”

No, not okay. I’m not okay. None of this is okay. How are you holding it together so well? “I’m fine.”

He nods slowly, not believing you for even a second. He doesn’t want to push it, you’d only shrug and brush it off. “You want me to come over tonight? I know your parents are out of town, figured you might not want to be alone.”

And you don’t want to be alone. You really truly don’t. In fact, you want Steve to come over and stay with you because the mere thought of having to spend another night alone with your thoughts in that empty house in this eerie town makes you want to hurl. Yet, the thought of him having to watch you when you become the anxious, emotional wreck that you seem to morph into everytime you get more than ten seconds alone makes you even more nauseous.

“Uh.” You pause, sweeping a hand over your forehead as you fold the last pile of clothes from one box, sorting them into sections and placing a fresh box filled with garments on the table in its wake. “I need to get some things for Max from her trailer and bring them to the hospital. Her mom wants me to bring some things for when she wakes up.” If she wakes up.

“I’ll probably stay at the hospital until late.” You continue, placing a yellow blouse in the section labelled ‘womens’. “So…”

Steve gnaws down on the inside of his mouth. Why don’t you want him around? You’re struggling, and it seems as though the last person you want to see is him, when you’re the person who’s been holding him together since this whole thing happened.

“Can I go with you? To the hospital— and the trailer. I know you don’t like driving in the dark anymore; and I don’t really want you to go over there on your own.” He’s rambling, he knows he is. He sounds like an idiot; why is he panicking? He’s your boyfriend, he’s allowed to care.

Please don’t shut me out, he thinks to himself. His eyes pierce holes into your temple as he watches purposely avoid his gaze.

“Erm—“ Your voice wavers, cutting yourself off. You feel like you’re about to cry, because he’s so perfect; so caring and kind and loving and you’re here self sabotaging because you don’t want to burden him. You’re driving yourself crazy and worrying him sick. “I don’t—“

You look at his face, the way his eyebrows are knitted together, the way his under eyes are darkened, the way his right arm is hovering in the air because he wants to pull you in close to him but doesn’t want to smother you. Your eyes water. “Actually, yeah. Yeah, I’d really like that.”

“Yeah?” His face lights up, he tries to bite back the grin on his face but he can’t stop it; he’s getting through to you. You nod. Your tears fall. Great, now you’re crying.

He coos at you, heart aching as your face crumples and you wrap your arms around his neck, burying your head in the crook. He sighs, one strong hand around the back of your head to support you, the other wrapping around your waist to keep you close to him.

Across the room, Robin gazes over at you. She gives Steve an encouraging thumbs up, and he shoots her a weak grin, before he’s pressing gentle kisses against your hairline. It’s almost pathetic to you how easy it is for him to ease your worries. Not everything is fixed, you know that; but having him around makes things a lot easier.

The crowds around you don’t seem as loud, the room doesn’t seem as small, you can breathe again. So can he.

“Steve?” Your head’s nudged against his chest, hands still clutching the fabric of his cotton shirt. He hums. “Can you stay over tonight?”

He lets out an airy chuckle, pulling you in close to him. “‘Course I can.”

(this is literally just me venting about how i feel about s4 ending and steve giving me the comfort i needed bc i’m not ok sorry bye)

#steve harrington x reader #steve harrington x you #steve harrington x y/n #steve harrington #stranger things fic #steve harrington imagine #Steve harrington #Steve harrington Drabble #Steve harrington fic #stranger things #x reader #stranger things x reader #steve harrington blurb

[no2tinngunsupporter]

Getting to know your BL mutuals - 2022 Edition

Simple, answer the questions. @ some people. Include the tag 'g2ky BL mutuals 2022' on your post so we can find everyone's answers!

Thank you to the lovely @sunflower-lychee for tagging me! I never get @ in these so I’m very happy 🥰

(Truthfully this year I have been kinda slow with watching new shows BUT I will do my best!) 

What has been the BL that took you by surprise this year?

Love In The Air!

I remember watching the pilot trailer when it aired but truthfully I forgot about this show until everyone started talking about it again 😅 Anyways... I fell in love so fast it’s not even funny. My mental health has been meh at best the past few months and I needed a show like LITA to just watch without having to really think :) Also the cast? Like?! In love with all four of them (especially Noeul).

The Eclipse!

I watched ep 1 when it first came out but never continued the show because I wasn’t feeling it (little did I know 🤡). Everyone was hyping this show up so I made myself sit down and watch it... ended up binging all 6 (aired) episodes and safe to say I was hooked... I mean if anyone on here saw my blog you were probably fed up of me talking about this show (very sorry). So yeah... It’s now one of my favourite BLs. We won’t talk about the cast because I will never stop, lets just say I am now a Neo and khaotung fanpage!  

This technically doesn’t count but I finally watched Bad Buddy this year and I’m mad at myself for waiting so long.

What has been the BL that you felt a bit disappointed with this year?

Cutie Pie- I didn’t dislike it but I found myself getting bored and skipping a lot, especially towards the end... shout out to Perth in that black shirt tho😏 Also loved the side couples

Even Sun- Listen I will do anything for BounPrem but lord I was struggling with this one. Why was the intro so long?! also who wrote the script because ooft. Skipped everything apart from the BounPrem scenes. 

What has been your favourite BL this year?

KinnPorsche- Lets all act surprised! This show was my entire personality all summer and the reason I came back to tumblr lol. Met so many lovely and amazing people because of this show and it will always have a special place in my heart. It also gave us the masterpiece that is Why Don’t You Stay aka my most played song of 2022. Again the cast is everything to me! 

Semantic Error- No explanation needed for this one really. I swear Seoham has been in the military for years! Why is it going so slowly?! 

Between Us- Are we only 4 episodes in? Yes. Do I care? NOPE! After waiting almost 3 years they could just stand in that locker room arguing for 12 episodes and I would still watch every second! As much as i tried not to, I did and still do have high expectations for this show BUT so far everything is perfect- I don’t really care about Team’s friends as characters or the relationship between Bee and Prince? but I also don’t hate it.

Favourite BL couples (not just of 2022)?

This is so hard to narrow down 😭 (I will refrain from going into detail otherwise we will be here all day)

WinTeam (I mean ^) 

RamKing (My Engineer) 

Sangwoo and Jaeyoung (Semantic Error)

PatPran (Bad Buddy)

VegasPete (KinnPorsche)

RainPayu and SkyPrapai (Payu and Pai are THE perfect boyfriends) 

AkkAyan (I truly can’t tell if it’s because I love the characters or if I am just down so bad for First and Khao 🥲)

There’s definitely more couples who should be on this list but my brain isn’t working rn

If you had to suggest a BL for someone what would it be?

Not Me- Everyone needs to watch it at least once in their live

Young Royals- It was actually my friend who doesn’t watch BLs that recommended it to me 

We Best Love- Maybe It’s just me but I adore that show

Also Where Your Eyes Linger so there is someone else who can suffer with me about how short it was! 

What's your non-BL favourite for this year?

This spot is strictly for Alice In Borderland 2 (when it airs) 

BUT

Until then... Business Proposal and Bridgerton.

This was so much harder than i thought it would be omg... anyways my aks are always open and I love talking about anything with anyone so feel free to say hi :) 

Tagging: @ahdriking @kurtstiel and @aleng-neng (and anyone else who wants to join in)

(If any of you already did this and I missed it, I am sorry 😅)

#g2ky bl mutuals 2022 #kinnporsche #kinnporsche the series #love in the air #LITA #the eclipse #cutie pie the series #Not Me the series #my engineer #we best love #Between us #winteam #akkayan #vegaspete #semantic error #phayu x rain #prapai x sky #young royals #i give up with tags

[twinge-of-cosmicangst]

what are your hopes for the final episode?

Gonna go by character I guess

Kendall- Kendall has always been a favourite of mine, I have liked him less this season, that’s not me saying he’s been OC or anything, I just think it’s his natural progression now he hasn’t got the moral of high ground over his father. He is becoming his father, he is the epitome of “the cycle” some people think Shiv is most like Logan, some even think Roman is, but to me it’s Kendall, and always has been, and it’s even more evident this season. When Ewan said that he and Logan had a meagreness about them, but the the difference between them is that Ewan tries to be moral, whereas at some point Logan stopped trying. Meaning that once upon a time Logan was a better man, which I think can be somewhat backed up by Connor the eldest being somewhat softer then the rest, perhaps Logan was not as brutal with him, if somewhat absent because of his obsession with his career (remind you of anyone) and then 15-25 odd years later his youngest son is physically beaten by him. I think when Ewan made that “he stopped trying” statement about Logan, the audience was supposed to think about Kendall. Despite his faults Kendall has shown genuine empathy multiple times throughout first 3 seasons and yet in season 4 he grows more and more cold as he literally tries to become his father. So the natural conclusion to this is that he becomes CEO but he is deeply unhappy and his soul is basically ruined and his whole family inevitably hating him. That would be a sad ending for Kendall fans, but it’s honestly hard to imagine another one for him, other then perhaps suicide, which I think is a possibility. So out of those to options I’d guess I’ll say CEO? I don’t know, the other potential CEO that I think could happen is maybe Tom, which would not great for him in the long run either but ultimately not as thematically tragic.

Roman- I honestly have no idea what Roman’s end game could be, I’m not even sure what I would want for him, that probably has something to do with the fact that he has never been one of my favourites, yet I do feel empathy for his character, Logan abused all his children, yet Roman was the only one he physically abused, to be singled out like that must be traumatising. I think he is slightly more likely to get a somewhat happier ending then Kendall (idk why I just feel it in my waters) and yeah he’s not my favourite but I don’t hate him, so I’ll be fine with him getting a neutral ending, perhaps working at Waystar (not CEO) and befriending Gerri once again?

Shiv: I am 99% sure that Shiv will not be CEO “American” or otherwise, I think pretty much all the other mains (aside from Connor) have more of a chance becoming CEO. This is not because I’m secretly a internal misogynist, neither do I think she will not become CEO because of her “Lack of experience” No the reason I think she has no chance is because of how the last episode ended Lucas telling her he can make the “American CEO work” was basically a neon sign saying “Matsson may be able to get an American CEO to work but it sure as fuck won’t be Shiv” that’s just how narrative convention works. Matsson is shady as fuck and it’s been kind of obvious that he’s been playing Shiv the whole time, she is aware of this and she has been playing him too, but she is only aware to an extent because when her mind is so close to the prize, I think she gets a little carried away. It fluctuates but at the moment Shiv is my second favourite character, and what I want for her professionally is what I’ve wanted for her since I watched season 2 and that’s to go back into politics. Connor has always been a bit of a scrounger (I love him though) and Ken and Roman of course have always been in the family business. Shiv was the only one to make a career for herself (yes she had a huge amount of privilege to help her build that career) but still she had a career that was hers not her fathers, not only that but she was a democrat, while her father has a hugely intimidating and influential presence in the conservative landscape, I never see anyone talk about how brave that was (even if it was somewhat to spite him lol) and yet after years of apparent resistance Logan managed to reel her back in, and we saw she was as desperate for his approval as her brothers were. The scene where Logan persuaded her to take her picture with Menken is one of the most devastating in the show imo, she was so reluctant but she did so for a promise of Waystar and Logan’s approval. She clearly had some passion for working in politics and she appeared to enjoy her job. This hope for her is fruitless though because it is the last episode of the last season so in terms of profession, my hope for Shiv would be that she ends up at Pierce, or perhaps goes into business with Roman (could they maybe work better together without Kendall, maybe it would be a disaster idk) I think there is more of a chance that Shiv gets out then there is for her brothers (she actually knows there is life outside of Waystar from 10+ years of a different career) also as she is my favourite of the siblings she is the one I want to escape the most, as I think working at Waystar (living in the haunted house) will end in misery for any of the siblings and I do want Shiv to be somewhat happy. In terms of personal I want Tom and Shiv to officially end it (although I think that’s unlikely this point) I’m not even talking from a Tomgreg perspective, Tom and Shiv clearly make each other miserable (I do believe they do love each other though) and I know them being miserable together is part of the appeal for a lot of people (hand in unloveable hand and all) but I would personally like them to put themselves out of their misery for good (honestly it would be better for their child as well) Speaking of the baby, I do not want to speak of it much because it is basically pointless as a plotline as we’ll never actually get to see the thing (unless they flash forward Harry Potter style “Logan Roman Nate Wambsgans you were named after the biggest sicko I’ve ever known”) I am not someone who was dead set against Shiv getting pregnant (in fact I thought it was a real possibility with some of the hints we got in season 3) but upon finding out that Jesse added it in last minute, it only makes me think the whole plotline is rushed and pointless and if the whole point of it is to bring Tom and Shiv back together, then dear god 🙄

Connor and Willa- These two’s married life seems to be going well (Yay I love Conwilla) and I think it is highly unlikely that they will randomly implode in the last episode, if they do, Jesse, I will Annie Wilkes your ass (For legal reasons this is a joke) but as the last episode is going to be very Waystar centric, Conwilla will probably be minimal, my main hope for them in the final is they get more screen time then I expect and that I am presently surprised, and that they are happy. Career wise it would be nice to hear how Willa’s playwriting is going, and I honestly don’t have a preference whether Connor is going to remain in politics or go back to “ranching” whatever tickles his pickle. What I would like for Connor though is a little, just smidge of affection from the sibs. GIVE US A SIBLING HUG WITH ALL 4 SIBLINGS YOU COWARDS! I know that the sibs care for Connor in their own way, but he doesn’t (he literally said no one loves him and none of them bothered correct him) Not to bring up the Tomshiv babby again but I can’t believe Matsson heard about it before brodad 🤮 the injustice. Please let at least one of the sibs have sweet moment with him. Please 🙏

Tom and Greg- Saving the best till last baby! I do genuinely want the gay art gallery date (real ones know) it is possible if somewhat unlikely. Other then that I do not expect Tomgreg to go canon but I would like them to have a decent amount of screen time (like proportionally the same as episode 8 which would be more screen time then episode 8 because episode 10 is 1/3 longer then episode 8, if I’m making sense) dream would be to have proportionally the same amount of screen time as episode 1 but that is unrealistic (episode 1 felt about 40% lmao). I would obviously like them to end on good terms, and I want them to be working together! I think Tom is a genuine possibility for “American CEO” he has experience, and Lukas may just do it to fuck with the Roy siblings. Matsson seems to genuinely like Greg but even he wouldn’t make someone like Greg CEO, under qualified is an understatement, the markets would freak, but maybe he would settle for Tom instead, maybe Greg persuades Matsson to name Tom (that would be the dream) I do think being CEO of Waystar inevitably leads to misery for anyone who becomes it (to quote Gerri “the job that makes your brain explode”) but like I said it’s not as tragic with Tom, because he won’t have the corpse of his abusive dead father breathing down his neck. Ultimately I would like Tom and Greg to be somewhat ok and working together and remain besties, wouldn’t mind Tom becoming CEO but idrc. If I’m being realistic I think Tom could end things in a really bad place unemployed? Publicly shamed? Getting arrested for cruises?? Lmao the last one is unlikely but not impossible, but I don’t want any of those things to happen, because he’s my favourite character and I don’t want him to be completely miserable, but I can deal with somewhat miserable, he kind of deserves it. With Greg I think he is the most likely out of the main characters to end up in a good place career wise (although again not CEO lmao) but it means nothing to me if he is in a good place career wise but estranged from Tom, so yeah Tomgreg to remain besties is really what I want for them the most (cheesy I know) a little bit of homoeroticism wouldn’t hurt either but I refuse to get my hopes up.

It just occurred to me while writing this that I said I wouldn’t mind if Tom became CEO but that I also said if Kendall doesn’t become CEO he’ll die! That is perhaps a bit extreme. But what I’m saying is that I think that out of all the characters Kendall is the most doomed by the narrative and will have a tragic ending no matter what, and hoping that he doesn’t his somewhat pointless, the only good thing that I can bring myself to hope for Kendall, is that his relationship with his siblings isn’t completely destroyed by the end of the series and that they are still on speaking terms.

#sorry for ending on a low point lmao! #Kendall roy #Roman roy #shiv roy #conwilla #tomgreg #Connor roy #willa ferreyra #tom wambsgans #greg hirsch #succession #succession spoilers #succession season 4 spoilers #spoilers

[girl4music]

So I’ve started Season 4 of ‘Angel the Series’ for the first time. I’ve got very low expectations so don’t worry about me. I can already tell by the first episode that the writing has gone wayward. Just that very last second with Cordy saying “God I am so bored”. A comedic moment on an ending scene is never good. At least not when it’s not supposed to be comedic.

I’ll be honest. I don’t really want to watch this season but I know if I don’t, I won’t understand much of the next season. Where the plot goes and where it ends up. And I know a lot of people love Season 5 of ‘AtS’ just like a lot of people love Season 5 of ‘BtVS’.

I will tell you what I do like about what I’ve seen so far - which is just the first episode; “Deep Down”.

A darker Wesley scrambling up the courage and will to locate Angel and save him and even giving him his blood to restore him to health. That was quite poetic. I definitely want to see where that goes so there’s one arc to look forward to. How that dynamic plays out.

I absolutely revelled in that scene between Angel and Connor and Angel finally putting him in his place for his destructive behaviour. I like that the naivety of “Mr. Dad” is gone because the way Connor is treating people that care about him is unacceptable - and no, I don’t just mean his father. Gun, Fred and Lorne too.

I also like that Lilah has finally taken control at Wolfram and Hart. She was always much smarter and more cunning than to be playing a minion to whatever male CEO of the week there was. Now they’re under her high-heeled boot. As it should be. As it should have been since Lindsey left and he warned her to get out. You know a great female villain isn’t a problem for me. And I have a feeling the “villain” part won’t remain now her feelings are complicated because of Wesley.

If nothing else - there’s still reason to continue watching even though I know the shitshow to come with who is arguably the only character that’s made this show something worth my time and attention.

I’m not necessarily worried about the plot or the characterization to be honest. Just how the writing handles them. Because I know that you can have the best concept, best set ups, best characters - but if the writing is poor - then it’s not going to matter anyway.

Like I said. My expectations are low. But somehow I feel I won’t be prepared for just how bad the writing is.

And I’ll say it now if it’s not clear.

I absolutely hate Connor.

#angel the series #season 4 #here we go #nervous #worried #but I’m continuing #let’s see this shitshow for myself

[lampmanliveblogs]

Speaking of feeling miserable…

I rewound the episode a little bit and took a second look at all the scenes Hunter’s in, to watch his reactions. Or rather, his lack of reactions.

Take the gang’s reaction to Luz telling them her crazy idea of teleporting to the Head. Everyone was like ”Whaaaat!?” but Hunter was like ”…” And that made me think a little more.

Throughout the episode so far, Hunter’s been acting irritable, agitated, and restless. Like when they first arrived through the portal or while they were at the Owl House. When he spotted ”Eda” on the star on the way to Bonesborough and while they were investigating what was going on there, he was in what I’d call ”mission mode.” Not quite full Golden Guard mode, but more so just focused on the current objective.

Then, when they get to Hexside, he’s just kinda… checked out. He has positive memories of this place too, in fact, he made a whole point to Philip last episode about how he wanted to go to Hexside like a normal student. He should feel something, react in some way, but he’s not.

He’s emotionally shut down and checked out. And in some ways, it’s similar to how Willow just now forced herself to keep her own sadness contained inside, because her friends need her to be strong for them. You know, conceal, don’t feel, don’t let them know. Out of sight, out of mind, as is Willow’s motto.

Hunter, I think, is shutting those strong negative emotions inside so he can focus squarely on the mission to find Belos and stop him. For Flapjack’s sake. He can cry later. The thing is though, sometimes, if you don’t let yourself feel the bad feelings, you won’t feel the good feelings either. You’l feel nothing, which is what I think is going on here.

Willow on the other hand I think might be trying to make herself feel only the good feelings, which can also have negative results. It looks like she might try to ignore her own sad emotions by trying to cheer up Hunter.

Much like how Hunter and Willow are ignoring their negative emotions for the sake of others, I try to make myself forget and ignore any and all spoilers I’ve come across during my adventures.

One of the minor spoilers I do recall was seeing that people apparently ship Gus and Mattholomule. And you know what? Maybe it’s been a little too long since I watched Through the Looking Glass Ruins or… (what other episodes do Gus and Mattholomule interact in…? I forgor), but I had forgotten that the two of them actually have pretty good chemistry. I can kinda see where the shippers are coming from.

I mean, who else would you even ship Gus with?

Oh, of course!

I was wondering about the memory photos from way back in Understanding Willow hanging on the board before. Turns out, it was a deliberate callback, as is Willow & Luz’ lines about ”No schemes, no plots, no ruses, and definitely no shenanigans.”

Yeah, that makes sense, rather than Luz trying to recreate the teleportation circle from memory, why not extract the memory directly from her brain? Let’s just hope Willow grabs the right memory and doesn’t accidentally extract the ones Luz doesn’t want them to see, the ones about how she ”helped” Philip and how the apocalypse is totally her fault.

Oh joy, oh joy!

This? This I hate to see!

And the next shot shows the flesh rotting away, leaving just the skeletal hand too, eeeew! My littlest brother keeps asking me of when I’m gonna watch The Owl House with him, but, uh… he might have to wait a little while longer…

I didn’t really think about it before, but Philip possessing the corpse of a clone of his brother… that can’t be good for his mental state. Then again, it’s not like his mental state was in a good place to begin with. Maybe this will break his mind so much that it loops back around into healing it?

#the owl house #liveblog #the owl house liveblog #for the future #toh s3e2

[lil-tachyon]

Hey logan, i'm trying to get into sci fi more, do you have any media, movies or otherwise you'd say it's a must watch for someone starting to get into it? Thanks

Super broad question! And precisely the thing I love to talk about. Although unfortunately I really don’t watch a lot of movies or TV so the best I can do for you is list some stuff I like and hope that you find something you enjoy. If we were talking sci-fi literature, that’s something I would probably write a full essay on- if anyone’s interested in reading my thoughts on that and getting my really long list of recommendations, just let me know. I might even do it on my own anyway, just for fun…

I guess if we’re going to talk about “must-watch” sci-fi movies then we have to talk about Star Wars first just to get it out of the way. I’ll keep it brief, far too much ink has been spilt regarding this franchise and you can find more in-depth opinions somewhere else. The original trilogy is great- there’s a reason it launched one of the biggest media franchises of the past 45 years. Endlessly rewatchable, somehow still looks better than basically any other big budget SFF popcorn movie and just plain fun. If you somehow haven’t seen the OT yet, get to it. 

You don’t really need to watch any other Star Wars stuff aside from the OT. The prequels aren’t exactly essential and they’re unquestionably worse in terms of dialog, acting, pacing (i.e. the nuts and bolts of storytelling.) If you’ve never watched Star Wars before you won’t have any nostalgia for them so you can skip them. Don’t even bother with the Disney sequels- pointless and incoherent. If you DO for some reason want more Star Wars in your life I can give you two recommendations: 

First is the masterpiece that is Genndy Tartakovsky’s (creator of Samurai Jack) Star Wars: Clone Wars (2003) (no, not the CGI Clone Wars show you’re probably thinking of). Split into 25 episodes ranging in length from two to twelve minutes, the whole show is only about two hours long but boy is it sweet. There are no main characters and not much in the way of an overarching plot. Instead the show is composed of a series of rapid-fire vignettes that take place across the entire Star Wars galaxy and tell dozens of unique microstories. It’s pulpy and fun and never takes itself too seriously and the whole thing is on YouTube because for some reason Disney actually hates everything that made Star Wars good and hasn’t taken the time to copyright strike it.

Second recommendation is the Mandalorian. I didn’t believe it when people started raving about it, but it really is great and tells a poignant, self-contained, original story. It’s not perfect and it definitely suffers from the Disneywars curse of really obnoxious references to the OT, but it’s absolutely worth the watch.

Damn that’s so much more time than I wanted to spend on Star Wars. I always forget how much of a SW geek I am until I start talking about it…

Quick list of the other big “essentials” that I’ve seen and can recommend before I get into more personal stuff (in no particular order):

Alien (1979) - Weird and creepy and gross and with impeccable visual design in every single frame. I need to rewatch it, only seen it once.

Akira (1988) - Massive, groundbreaking, unsettling, beautiful. Brought cyberpunk into the visual realm, brought anime to the West in a whole new way. I could rewatch it a hundred times. 

2001: A Space Odyssey (1968) - A foundational film that moves at a foreboding crawl and leaves you feeling unsafe and unsure of what you just watched. (Also my dad’s band referenced the monkey scene in their big-label debut music video, so that should be reason enough to watch it)

Close Encounters of the Third Kind (1977) - UFOs, the American West, and the most 70s-looking cast imaginable. It feels more a product of its time than most of the others on this list, but I love it for that and it does nothing to make it any less impactful or engrossing.

The Terminator (1984) and Terminator 2: Judgement Day (1991) - I waited waaaaaay too long to watch these. I only got around to seeing them this past year in fact. I had always just written them off in my head as nothing more than cheesy 80s action flicks but my God are they good and so much different from what I expected. The first one is basically a sci-fi slasher film and the second is probably the best sequel film I’ve ever seen and takes everything in a totally different direction that still manages to build on all the groundwork laid by the first. Please watch, don’t be like me and wait until you’re twenty-six. 

Nausicaä of the Valley of the Wind (1984) - My favorite Ghibli movie. For being a film about people flying airships and fighting bugs in a giant toxic jungle, it really has a lot of important stuff to say and says it very well.

Castle in the Sky (1988) - Hits a lot of the same plot beats as Nausicaä and, imo, suffers a little bit in comparison but still a great anime sci-fantasy romp. 

The Thing (1982) - Disgusting sci-fi horror in the glacial Antarctic wastes

The Twilight Zone (1959-1964) - The first, the best. Sure, it’s inconsistent in terms of quality, but it’s at least consistently weird and inventive and the good episodes are really damn good. Also something I love about it is the acting- it’s very over-the-top expressive and exaggerated. Feels more like it’s meant for the stage than for the small screen. You don’t see a lot of TV like that these days. 

The X-Files (1993-2002, 2016-2018) - Absolutely in my top 5 TV shows. It was great to watch as a 14-year-old because I was still young enough to find it scary, and it’s great on every re-watch because I can really appreciate how much chemistry Gillian Anderson and David Duchovny have and how fun, goofy, and overall weird it is. As I recall it starts to decline noticeably in season 8. Season 9 you’ll have to grit your teeth to get through. The 2016-2018 revival is half composed of unwatcheable “storyline” episodes and half surprisingly good-to-great “monster of the week” episodes.

Cowboy Bebop (1998-1999) - My number one favorite anime, I love everything about it. So much effort goes into small background details and characters that only appear for a few seconds and it really goes a long way to making the whole universe of the show feel so real that you could see yourself living in it. Also the soundtrack is top-notch, I listen to it regularly. 

Neon Genesis Evangelion (1995-1996) and End of Evangelion (1997) - Another one that I took too long to get to and to be honest I probably would’ve been more into it had I watched it when I was younger, but it’s still great and I recommend it. Features a classic “inflation suit” episode

Stuff that’s less “essential” but I really like it:

Planetes (2003-2004) - My second favorite anime. Starts off as a workplace slice-of-life and slowly builds into a really, really emotional conclusion. Can’t recommend it enough.

Forbidden Planet (1956) - A sci-fi adaptation of Shakespeare’s The Tempest (I’m an illiterate piece of shit so I can’t tell you how good an adaptation it is). It’s slow-paced and eerie, and way more atmospheric than its decidedly 1950s visuals would lead you to believe.

Digimon: The Movie (2000) / Summer Wars (2009) - A short story: as a kid I probably watched the Digmon Movie about a million times. It was huge with kids my age and was probably an entire generation’s first introduction to ska-punk. It’s a great movie. Anyway, fast forward about a decade and a half and at some point I sit down to watch Summer Wars with my brother on no other information than that we heard it’s good. And it is! But pretty soon into the movie we both notice something odd- it seems to feature almost the exact same plot as the Digmon Movie. After a bit of digging we find out that they were both directed by the same guy and it seems he just had this idea in his head for a story that he really wanted to make for over a decade because Summer Wars is basically a more mature and less merchandisable remake. Watch them both!

Samurai Jack (2001-2004, 2017) - the first cartoon I saw as a kid that really made me say “finally, something for me!” I wouldn’t get another TV show aimed at me that was “cool” and “epic” and “badass” until ATLA came out. Nothing beats watching a samurai fight a million robots and bounty-hunters on an endless quest to go back to the past. Also the season 5 revival is great and I genuinely don’t get why a lot of people seemed to really hate on it. 

Moon (2009) - It’s been a LONG time since I watched it, but I liked it quite a bit. A lonely lunar miner runs into what seems to be his double and things get spooky…

Prospect (2018) - More space miners running into trouble! Really great costume and prop design on a super small budget (but you wouldn’t know it from how good it looks). 

Mobile Suit Gundam 0080: War in the Pocket (1989) - Listen- I’m not a gundam guy. I don’t care about all the different robots and I’m not about to watch 40 years of TV to try and figure out the story. Which is why War in the Pocket is great because it’s six episodes long and it just tells a really touching story punctuated by cool robot battles and you don’t need to know anything about Gundam to enjoy it.

Royal Space Force: The Wings of Honnêamise (1987) - A story about a space race set on an alternate world. What really sets it apart is the visual design- every detail from books, to currency, to texts to vehicles, to architecture is unique enough to feel totally alien but also grounded enough to somehow feel familiar. It’s quite an achievement. Trigger Warning: there’s a very uncomfortable rape scene in the middle of the film that seems to come out of nowhere. I’m still not sure why they chose to include it.

Jin-Roh: The Wolf Brigade (1999) - Military police get up to some real nasty stuff in alternate history fashy 1950s Japan. Very depressing, all my friends complained to me about how sad it was even though they went into it knowing what it was about and agreeing to watch it with me. You just can’t win sometimes!

That’s about all I have for now. I know it’s all kind of basic bitch stuff but like I said, I don’t often watch movies/TV. Hope it helps and thanks for the great question!

#sci fi #send me an ask! #long post

[icoreswaw]

iCORE is now at 1% of its goal—help it resonate further!

On the Kickstarter page, I added this new section: Letter from the author

Involvement (BIG WORD)—that’s what I set out to achieve when I started writing iCORE. Actually, the project had a different name originally, but I’ll reveal it only once the world has read the last volume and/or watched the last animated episode. (Yes, in my frivolous mind there is no doubt it will happen—GARGANTUAN CONFIDENCE)

Who is Takeshi? Why write about yet another Japanese student reborn in another world? Anyone would think that, since most anime, manga, and (last but not least) light novels talk about Japanese main characters, it’s normal to pick a Japanese name for your hero. But iCORE, contrary to how it may appear, is specially connected with this choice. Of course, I won’t spoil its plot—which is terrific (EVIL LAUGHTER), but I can tell you that there’s much more to the story than what appears on the surface.

iCORE is a classic isekai apparently but structured to strongly engage the reader–or the watcher (GARGANTUAN CONFIDENCE IS BACK: ANIME IS THE WAY!) In an intimate manner, so to speak: I want the reader to truly get into Takeshi’s skin. It’s really hard to achieve that, but I believe I came close—or even succeeded. Although my editor Majora read this first volume dozens of times, I still feel her genuine involvement. But it could be madness, as she is helplessly caught up in another world—iCORE world—without me noticing. Someone fetch the editor!

The development of iCORE also required me to draw the characters’ model sheets that you can see here and in all my galleries. Why did the author devote themselves to drawing them? (WHY WHY WHY!!! Self-pity…) The reason is that there are future story and character developments I can’t reveal yet (every little detail has its weight and is bonded with others). About the book’s actual illustrations (some of which you can admire on this Kickstarter page), I have relied upon Habanagi Tak, who instantly understood the main character’s mood. That said, communicating with an artist isn’t easy, especially when you expect painstaking attention to detail from them… You don’t hate me, Tak-san, do you?

(Yes, I do) (Yes, just a bit) (Definitely)

If you read this far without yawning, you won one virtual chocolate and my gratitude—speaking of gratitude (EVIL LAUGHTER is back), this project needs support. Even by just sharing this with friends who love isekai and fantasy stories, you’ll help iCORE take off. Advanced editing and a Japanese translation are expensive, but I would be really happy just to achieve the funding goal. Time for me to go back to writing the second book, which I hope to launch by the end of this year. (self-pity is the way…)

Isekai Tempo

#icore #light novel #crowdfunding #kickstarter #isekai #fantasy #young adult #books #icoreswaw #isekaitempo

[silverpen-and-paper]

loki season 2 episode 6 spoilers

woah?? the banner thing at the top of disney+ has three different ones for loki. one says “he’s bad,” the other says “he’s good,” and the other says “he’s back”

WOAH?? the finale episode is titled the same as the very first episode?!?

can we save victor now please we have the perfect chance

OH??? NEW WACKY INTRO??

HOLY CANNOLI ITS GOING BACKWARDS

NO VICTOR NO

LOKI STOP HIM

LOKI. STOP HIM

I SAID STOP HIM

NOOO STOP MAKING ME WATCH VICTOR DIE

holy crap loki went WAY back this time (i say as if he probably won’t go back even further later on)

awwwwww ouroboros and victor meeting again 

sylvie is suspicioussss

for some reason ppl explaining things that are gonna happen during time loop scenarios also give me secondhand embarrassment so i’m just gonna [mutes] [subtitles]

“centuries later” THE FUCK. NO

NO YOU CAN’T JUST DO THIS TO ME

YOU CAN’T JUST DO THAT FOR A GAG MARVEL YOU CAN’T 

victor please don’t die this time

oh HE’S DOING IT PLEASE MAKE IT PLEASE

ALMOST THERE YOU CAN DO IT VICTOR (he’s probably not gonna be able to do it)

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

hurry hurry hurry

so close so close so close

IT WORKED?!?!

IS IT ACTUALLY GONNA WORK

run victor run!!! come back!!

pumpkins?? skfhsk what’s that supposed to mean victor 

please don’t go wrong at the last second!!

noooooo it’s going wrong at the last second

and there he goes, even further back

NOOO LOKI DON’T PRETEND TO BETRAY HER

NO NO NO DON’T KILL SYLVIE NO PLEASE DON’T BE WHAT THAT LINE WAS FOR

ooooohhh dear even further back

oh PHEW he didn’t kill her. please don’t change your mind loki 

gaspppp he froze sylvie

gaspppppp LOKI froze sylvie

ew why did you lick your finger

wait if he who remains didn’t wanna stop being in charge of everything, then why did he “pave the road” for loki and sylvie to get there in the first place? was he just bored?

wait what WOULD happen to his friends

NO DON’T KILL SYLVIE

and there he goes, even FURTHER back in time

you know i really hate when stories do stuff like this bc unless they find a damn clever way to fix it, it makes it feel like all the relationships are unauthentic and lopsided

oh dear secondhand embarrassment time again

“comfort? there’s no comfort.” that’s a really good line actually, i really like that 

wait was that one hunter mobius?!

oooohh i really like that we’re getting this characterization in canon

but hold on this means that loki’s gonna kill sylvie

MOBIUS NO WHAT WHY IS HE DISAPPEARING 

ohh sylvie figured out what’s up

“and who are you to say we can’t die fighting?” sylvie i love you

“sometimes it’s okay to destroy something” not sure which something she’s referring to here

what’s loki gonna dooooo

wait is he gonna break the temporal loom anyway?! no matter what hwr said?!

awwwwww loki’s smile at them i’m gonna cry

loki’s gonna go down the pathway?!?

LOKI WHAT ARE YOU DOING

the temporal radiation put fancy clothes on loki?!!?!!?!!

HE’S BREAKING ITTTTTT

WOAH 

WHAT’S ALL THOSE TERRIFYING STRINGS

rainbow lights over the gang? they are all gay it’s canon now /hj

WOAH THE TIMELINES ARE SO TINY???

loki why did you grab one and turn it green???? what did that do???

HOOOOLY FUCK LOKI’S BRINGING ALL THE TIMELINE’S BACK TO LIFE???

WHAT IS THAT SUPER BRIGHT LIGHT

LOKI WHY ARE YOU STARING AT THEM WITH THAT FACE. PLEASE BE A “look i did it” FACE AND NOT A “I’M POWERFUL GOODBYE NOW” FACE

WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON

WHY IS THERE GOLD CRAWLING TO A THRONE PLEASE TELL ME LOKI ISN’T GONNA HAVE TO SIT THERE FOR ETERNITY

OH MY GOD IS THIS YGGDRASIL 

“after” WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU MEAN BY THAT

THEY CHANGED THE WHOLE TVA YES

“you’re leaving” WHAT MOBIUS WHERE ARE YOU GOING

NO STOP WITH THE SLOW MO SHOTS YOU’RE MAKING ME SAD

BABY VICTOR!

ravonna at the end of time field??

woah what are those purple lights???

is mobius just gonna watch his other self?? what’s your plan here my guy??

sylvie!

i’m sorry but that rainbow lighting over mobius when he agrees that it’s weird that loki’s not there? 🏳️‍🌈

mobius you can’t just stalk your other self?? i still don’t know what he’s doing

LOKI NOOOOO HE’S CRYING

STOP IT THIS ISN’T WHAT WE MEANT WHEN WE SAID WE WANTED TO SEE MORE LOKI MAGIC

i’m legitimately sobbing right now. loki’s all alone again. forever. for eternity. i hate it here

fuck “poetic cinema” or whatever they’re gonna say this is, this is the worst ending i have ever seen. all we wanted was for loki to not be alone. that’s literally it and they can’t even deliver on that

i just want to curl up in a little ball and die my blorbo is not okay

i’ve had loki as a spinterest since this show first started coming out. this is where it all started. and i’ve grown to understand their character better over the years, and while i didn’t like the show a whole lot once i did, i was still excited to watch it y’know and loki means so much to me and then they fucking end it like THIS 

yeah sorry for ranting but what the hell man

actually no i’m not sorry and i’m gonna go thru like ten stages of grief and broadcast it all to you

shaking marvel HOW HARD IS IT TO HAVE YOUR CHARACTERS BE HAPPY IT ISN’T TOO FUCKING HARD

DOES LITERALLY EVERY LOKI STORY HAVE TO END IN TRAGEDY??

i’m not even mad about the ships. like i joke about lokius a lot but it’s not like. the main appeal y’know? it’s not like i really expected it to happen anyway. but i DIDN’T FUCKING EXPECT THEM TO LEAVE LOKI ALL ALONE AT THE END

first loki where mischief lies and now THIS

(loki where mischief lies was a good book and i’m not too mad about that one being sad bc it was supposed to be semi-mcu compliant and you kinda knew it would be sad before reading it but i feel like i’ve been punched in the gut a million times by now)

said it before and i’ll say it again WHY DOES EVERY “OFFICIAL” LOKI STORY HAVE TO END IN TRAGEDY. WHY CAN’T THEY EVER JUST HAVE AND KEEP FRIENDS FOR ONCE

ripping and tearing at the walls i fucking hate it in here

somebody arrest marvel because they murdered me by violently tearing out my heart and not in the good way

i don’t know how i’m gonna recover from this. “oh he’s with his family now” WHAT THE HELL TRAILERS YOU LIED TO US

i was actually working on a series rewrite but after this i don’t know if i’m gonna be able to think about it at all. it just hurts and i don’t know how to rewrite all this pain

loki literally spent centuries trying to save their friends and be with their friends and yeah they saved the universe but they freaking AREN’T WITH THEIR FRIENDS

“you deserve to be alone” WASN’T THE WHOLE POINT OF S1 TO BE PROVING THAT WRONG. WASN’T THAT THE WHOLE POINT

but NOOOOOO we just gotta have loki learn that they DON’T deserve to be alone actually AND THEN IMMEDIATELY MAKE THEM ETERNALLY BE ALONE

“they’re not really alone they’ve got everyone in the timelines to watch over” THAT’S NOT THE FRICKING SAME AND YOU KNOW IT. HOW WOULD YOU FEEL IF YOU COULDN’T INTERACT WITH ANYBODY AND WERE JUST ETERNALLY STUCK WATCHING THEM LIVE THEIR LIVES WITHOUT YOU. IT WOULD FEEL FUCKING LONELY WOULDN’T IT

i can’t. i don’t know what i’m saying this about exactly but i know i can’t.

“we wanna make a season 3” ABOUT WHAT ABOUT LOKI SITTING THERE AND CRYING

also what is this saying to all the people who relate to loki’s loneliness and struggles and saw hope for themselves through watching loki gain friends and happiness. oh wait silly me marvel doesn’t think about their viewers except in terms of money dispensers

before this finale i was like “well the loki series has a lot of problems but it’s not horrendously bad, it’s salvageable” well i spoke too fucking soon

(cough cough not to mention they STILL didn’t acknowledge that loki was genderfluid cough)

i’m going to explode i’m going to melt away into nothingness i’m going to grind up the mcu and use it for fertilizer 

they fucking ended the show on a shot of loki CRYING

pure RAGE

the #?? stages of this specific grief: sadness, anger, anger, anger, probably denial coming later when i figure out how to lock this series out of my brain

nunemaker’s parable by everybody’s worried about owen is a particularly fitting song for this. unfortunately 

i’ve kinda been a loki series blog until now bc "created it not too far from the show’s s2 premiere" + loki spinterest = loki show blog but i feel like this is gonna become a loki show hate blog now bc WHY WOULD THEY FUCKING END IT LIKE THAT

i was planning on rewatching the whole show and then writing a review on it but i just don’t know if i could emotionally handle that knowing this is how it ends

ugh. i just. what am i supposed to do now

i feel so empty and yet so full of rage and also sadness

ok rant over. for now at least. will probably rant about it later

#loki #loki series #loki show #loki season 2 #loki spoilers #loki season two episode six #loki season two episode six spoilers #loki s2 ep6 #loki s2 ep6 spoilers #why. #why

[skye-huntress]

I’m in Love with the Villainess Reaction

I am a little behind on actually writing these reactions, however I have been watching these episodes multiple times since they aired. This series is a favourite of mine, and I have read the novels and keep up to date with the manga. As you can imagine, I’m thrilled to see this anime, especially with a same day English dub, though the lack of text translations is still annoying. I’m curious to see how far along they get. It’d be great to see to the end of the second novel, that’d tell at least a somewhat complete story, but depending on the pacing, we’d probably need two cours for that.

Episode 1

Spent the first 30 seconds explaining the basic premise of the whole show, and zero ambiguity as to the protagonist’s sexuality or love interest.

The exact nature of what happened to Rae, and why, isn’t explained until much, much later, and it’s irrelevant to current plot, so don’t worry about it too much. All you need to know is that Rae reincarnated, and gained memories of her past life from the supposed starting point of her game, i.e. when she met Claire for the first time.

As for the whole age thing, again, it’s best not to overthink it. Personally, I find it easy to forget that Rae has memories of being an adult since she rarely acts like it. Physically, she is a teenager again, from her brain to her hormones, so it’s no wonder that 99% of the time she acts like her physical age instead of her mental one.

In many romances, the protagonists may often go most of the length of the story without revealing their feelings to those they are in love with. Rae is not one of those protagonists.

So yes, the bullying. For a supposed villainess, Claire’s bullying tactics are relatively underwhelming. Not surprised I saw someone questioned what makes her a “villainess”, but this is just the start of the story.

As for Rae, I wouldn’t say she is a masochist, more that she enjoys receiving the attention from Claire specifically. It certainly helps she knows all of Claire’s motivations and self-imposed restrictions. Plus, so long as she makes sure Claire hates her, she won’t ignore her.

One last thing I wanted to note, it’s never explicitly stated, but I’ve always suspected that part of the reason Rae responds to Claire’s “bullying” with more teasing is also a cover for Claire’s intended actions. Outsiders don’t see a bully and a victim, they see two seemingly close classmates playing some kind of weird game.

When I first read the manga, it was the first time I’d seen the flower thing and it was a long time before I learned what that was supposed to be. Apparently, it’s from a practice of placing flowers on the desk of students whom have passed away. It’s also a way of bullying the living. Probably the most inappropriate, disgraceful thing Claire does in this entire series, but naturally, Rae found a way to spin it into a gesture of kindness.

“Strange that you’d think I’d have anything to say to you.” Continues to talk to her because we all know she can’t help herself.

Ah yes, the boys still exist, even though no one is interested.

When Rae said they should go apologise to Thane, I think that was the first time she dropped the class clown act in front of Claire. Most of the time, she does these kind of silly voices, but then she’ll speak normally when she’s being completely sincere.

Valid question, why are there tests at the start of the school year? It seems especially mean to the commoners transferring in who aren’t familiar with most of the material.

According to the novel, Claire would often give these challenges to the protagonist, but despite the high stakes, the player doesn’t get anything for overcoming said challenges. Well, now Rae can set her own terms and actually make it worth her time.

“Are you trying to provoke me, Rae Taylor?” You should know, she’s throwing your own words right back at you.

“The funny thing is, I know you’re playing me…”

The fact that commoners have to take the etiquette exam with only a week of prep is just so wrong.

Rae really lost points for being a useless lesbian.

In the manga, they gave Claire an “Ultra High” (Exceptional) affinity for fire, but that might have just been a mistake, since both the novels and now the anime state her aptitude is only High. From what I can tell, it just means that she can’t use the highest tier of fire spells, but she’s still far more powerful than most magic users.

Since the dub didn’t come with text translations I can’t really read the test results, but I can easily look them up in the manga or novels.

Thane was in a bad mood before because he apparently “didn’t do so well” on the written test, yet he still ended up in the top ten. If you’re not comparing him to his siblings, his score is pretty damn good.

Rae claims to know the game better than the people who made it, and yet she still got two questions wrong. Thinking about it now, this could potentially be an early warning sign that Rae’s knowledge might be lacking in some aspects, or maybe she just made a careless mistake or two. Either explanation is possible.

As for the etiquette exam, for all Claire’s gloating, Rae still placed considerably high for a commoner without any etiquette training. She might have even beaten some lower ranked nobles with a score like that.

You can tell that Rae’s not worried at all when her only thoughts are on Claire’s cuteness.

Then there’s Misha, who should be out of practice but still placed 8th. Probably because she is such a reserved and collected person.

Finally the magic test, the only one Thane beats his siblings on, though only by a small margin.

Misha gets a nearly perfect score, which I think is partly thanks to having an Exceptional affinity.

Claire also placed exceptionally high. Not so many nobles are so blessed with magic, hence the transfers like Misha and Rae. Her high scores in each exam should have guaranteed her the win after Rae’s lacking performance on the second test, but well…

Then there’s Rae who basically broke the magic exam and came in first even despite intentionally flubbing the magic tools portion. Yep, this challenge really was rigged from the start, but it wasn’t in Claire’s favour like she thought it would be.

And that’s where we end it for the first episode.

#i’m in love with the villainess

[dangermousie]

Farscape rewatch: Infinite Possibilities, Part 1: Daedalus Demands, 3x14

One of my favorite episodes, but I think it will take me a bit until I can watch the second part.

But first off, about the ep title. I love Farscape ep titles entirely too much. Sometimes they are just appropriate or punny. And sometimes, they are brilliant.

I think this is brilliant. Because the possibilities are infinite here, for Talyn John, for one brief moment: knowledge of wormholes, ability to go home, Aeryn who loves him and wants to go home with him, Harvey gone. But of course, possibilities are infinite for badness, too, in the other direction.

And of course, the whole reference to Daedalus and Icarus. Because it's Ancient Jack who is the Daedalus here, who gets John drawn into trying to save the place to fix it (understandably so, it would be curtains for everyone if the Scarrans got their hands on the tech), but it's John who pays the price, for that shiny 'gift' the ancients installed in his head, the gift he didn't ask for and which turned into such a curse for him. Because in the Farscape world, kind gestures, good feelings, can hurt and trap you even more than unkind ones.

First off, I want to mention how much I loathe Furlow. I loathe, loathe, loathe her. Not even for her evilness, but because she is so stupid. All that drives her is greed, but it's simple, stupid greed, where she cannot understand the conequences of her playing with the big boys. She is just...it's like a person who slits your throat for a twenty dollar bill.

HATE.

I love Rygel in this ep, showing total ruthlessness, in torturing the Charrid to death. We see Rygel usually as the selfish comic relief, stuffing himself with food or what not, but he was a ruler of billions of subjects, and we are regularly reminded of it, and such job must have required a hell of a ruthless streak (as he told that religious fanatic in Suns and Lovers, he was a dominar so it would take him a long time to repent.) He can be scary. But he can have courage, too, when treated properly, as Aeryn knows how to do, appealing to his forebears' military honor (Zhaan was able to do something similar in early S1, I remember).

There is Ancient Jack and I love the tension between him and John: there is also always something less than human about Jack, and I love that feeling of 'otherness.'

And oh John. Oh Aeryn. We know it can be nothing good when the episode opens with them so perfect together, so functional, so amazing, easy intimacy (he is kissing her leg), her learning English. Through this two-parter they work as one: they run, they fight, they talk with their voices and their eyes, perfect unison. We know it can come to no good.

We won't see the same again, not after IP2, not until all the way in WSS at the end of S4. I love about J/A that they are fascinating, irresistible to watch when their UST has been resolved, they are just fascinating, period.

And of course, Aeryn is the most important. Harvey knows that: when he is afraid he will be deleted, he chooses to play on that one factor, nothing else, telling John if Jack finds out about him, he will kill everyone, even Aeryn, and does he want to risk Aeryn.

Oh, darlings.

And I love that Aeryn is always, always, always John's line to sanity. He kisses her before Jack undertakes to remove Harvey from him (because it might not work), just as he kissed her to clear his head in LGM, just as he will kiss her in IP2. He finds his center in her, his peace.

And of course, the removal, and Aeryn's worst nightmare back, the clone taking over and telling her to kill him (she must be reliving DMD). And oh Aeryn. I love her. She promised   John to kill him if this happens, and I love both that the fact that John asks and knows she will, and that she would.

Oh, I love them so much.

Also, because I don't want to leave him out, the stuff with Crais and Talyn, both going blind, was awesome.

#farscape