#can't eat eggs

[onebizarrekai]

dear minecraft please no more mob votes. no more new mobs. please add things besides new mobs for a little while. fix the old ones instead. spiders are still sliding horizontally up walls. skeletons have no animation for drawing their bow and can shoot you while facing away from you. standard mobs have like a quarter as many bones as new mobs and no custom animations. let people vote for food instead or something

#WE STILL CAN'T EVEN EAT EGGS #random stuff #edit: yeah the mobs they're picking between this time are coincidentally pretty cool #but you know… past votes… current features… you get the gist #do you think if they add penguins ice boats will be even faster

[shadeswift99]

Thinking about how the players of Double Life immediately started subtly being more careful because of the soul bonds. Thinking about how even though this is a death game, even though the goal has always been to stay alive at all costs and take as little damage as possible, I heard so many variations on "I'm going to have to get used to taking care of you, too" from so many of them, followed by them taking much better care of themselves. Thinking about how out of their way they go not to take small amounts of mundane damage from falls and drowning because the harm feels different when it isn't just you suffering it. Just...thinking a lot about that.

#double life #It's fascinating to me #just....the difference in thinking it makes to imagine a person outside of yourself coming to harm or inconvenience from something you do #vs when it's just yourself #the extra vigilance that in the end doesn't really make much sense #because aren't all of them just people? aren't you also a person? #why does it feel different to take a hit alone than to share it with somebody else? why does that make us more reluctant? #it's very interesting and i think it might actually help all of them to last longer in the series #it's like the life series equivalent to being given a plant to take care of for your mental health #or like. one of those egg babies from home ec classes #because suddenly it's not just /you/ #i can't wait to see how that'll play out #(but also. if you're reading this maybe go get a glass of water if you're thirsty) #(eat if you're hungry，get a blanket if you're cold) #(because i bet you would if you had a friend soul bound to you who could feel the same things) #(and are you not soul bound to yourself?)

[notbecauseofvictories]

I’ve now seen the “would you eat lab-grown meat” poll twice, which means it is time to air one of my least charitable opinions---namely, I think imitation meat is an abomination. I could pretend this is for noble reasons (and I want to believe I have a couple in the mix) but truthfully its existence revolts and annoys me. It feels like a kind of hypocrisy; I mean, I’m sorry if you crave chicken wings for whatever reason? but you’re the one who gave up an omnivorous diet and refused to get creative with the foods left to you. Eat your cauliflower in buffalo sauce and shut up.

#there is a particular website that has a very very helpful list of which vegetables should go in vegetable stock - it's a great list! #unfortunately when you scroll down to mushrooms you are forced to read the sentence ''I eat a plant-based diet #so I don't touch mushrooms (fungi)'' and I swear the first time I read that I blacked out with rage and woke up six hours later #naked in the woods with an armful of maitake #and like....I understand wanting alternatives to something you can't eat! I get it! #(the eggs rolls fried in peanut oil are delicious right up until the allergy strikes) #but styrofoam in the shape of a burger patty feels like the wrong way to go #tw food #no love sincerer than the love of food

[helluva-poly]

Okay but like, au where Charlie is already friends with the people of, and the hotel is based in, Cannibal Town

#hazbin hotel #charlie morningstar #hazbin hotel au #I just think it would be neat #also an excuse for everyone in the au to have to dress in 1910 style clothing or else there neighbors will literally eat them lol #just imagine all the hijinks #Pentious tries to attack the hotel and gets eaten by cannibals lol #Angel can't get any damn sleep cause everyone's always fuckin singing #And Charlie's sponsor is Rosie!!! #Alastor tries to get involved and Rosie's like “Al I love you but stay away from my new daughter" #Hell's Greatest Mom lol #Cannibal Town would probably love Razzle Dazzle Keekee and the egg boiz #Do you see my vision?

[crowleys-hips]

i don't know why i'm so particularly annoyed at this specifically, but i'm SICK of going to sushi restaurants and the waiters going "that one's vegetarian, are you SURE you want the vegetarian one? the one without fish? the vegetarian one with veggies in it and NO fish??"

like oh you mean the fish that are currently being overfished with many species on the brink of extinction? destroying entire aquatic ecosystems?? the fish with like a trillion micro plastics in them? and mercury? arsenic? lead??? THOSE FISH??? oh YES please bring me your LARGEST dish that sounds fucking delicious

#like don't get me wrong #i love fish and would eat it weekly if i could #but not in this day and age i can't #i won't judge if someone does but #i myself simply can't deal with it #i'd be vegan if i could but if i didn't eat eggs i probably wouldn't get any proper protein in this sack of flesh #my shitposts #vegetarian

[feluka]

my dad when we buy FOOD: oh my god??? you guys need to economize, we are in a CRISIS

my dad when he buys 3 cigarette boxes a day and 2 bottles of booze: yippee!!!

#like yeah we do need to economize but we also need to eat LMAO #we already cut out all meat what the fuck do you want!! #he's like omg guys stop spending my drinking money on necessities!! can't you guys starve a little so i can get drunk? smh so inconsiderate #can't forget when he complained that we ate eggs that he bought and we were like yeah you're right sorry #we should've waited for them to hatch instead my bad

[amanitacurses]

loosely based on true events [2]

#terukane #jibaku shounen hanako kun #toilet bound hanako kun #jshk akane #minamoto teru #aoi akane #jshk teru #jshk #tbhk #the event in question is that okkofushi cut up a popsicle for me #after I was complaining about how hard it was to eat anything #other than like- pudding and jell'o and eggs #and we both realized that we got popsicles specifically so I could eat them #only to realize that I can't suck on anything ;;; #the continued joke of teru being obsessed with sanrio uwu

[the-most-pathetic-edge-marquis]

what can Bella Swan actually cook?

armed with LegalTM pdfs, control f, and my theory that Bella doesn't actually like cooking she was just written by a mormon housewife, I have determined every specifically named meal Bella cooks in the Twilight Saga!

In summary:

15 total named meals (7 in Twilight, 3 each in New Moon/Eclipse, and 2 in Breaking Dawn)

13 unique meals (lasagna & fried chicken repeat across books)

Presumably she's also cooking literally every other day (when they aren't ordering pizza, which is apparently the only takeout Charlie ever gets), but it's not relevant to her narrative.

my main conclusion is that she eats way too much cereal, but for the purposes of this i've decided that cereal doesn't count as cooking.

Bella Swan canonically knows how to cook:

Twilight:

Steak and potatoes, plus salad (pg 15)

White people enchiladas (p.36)

Fish (marinated), with “salad and bread left over from the night before” (p.68)

Cold-cut sandwiches (p.70)

Grilled cheese (with tomato) (p.111)

Lasagna (p.118)

Fish, using Harry Clearwater’s fish fry (p.169)

New Moon:

Fried chicken (p.70)

Lasagna (p.82)

Casserole (p.197)

Eclipse:

Spaghetti, (rescued from Charlie)

Grandma Swan’s stroganoff recipe (p.29)

Hamburger (p.43)

Breaking Dawn:

Sunny-side up eggs (p.75)

Damn rancid chicken Fried chicken (p.80)

#my meta #bella swan #so i guess she can cook but uh... #this is. very boring. lmao #at one point she says that renee likes to 'experiment' and sometimes it's inedible... #DO YOU MEAN RENEE MAKES FOOD WITH FLAVOR #BECAUSE I FEEL LIKE THAT JUST MEANS RENEE MAKES FOOD WITH FLAVOR. #sorry not to be a renee apologist in the tags #but also this specific search made me SO MAD at charlie so #eclipse is really the worst book. character assassination for EVERYONE #also oh my god she eats so much cereal #you guys? you guys #are there people out there who eat that much cereal??? #that can't be good for you!!! #she eats cereal every day!!! #except for the first when charlie makes her bacon and eggs and she asks to take over the cooking #bella!!! #i think she must not like eggs #(ignoring how many she eats in breaking dawn shh it's fine) #page numbers are all from my pdfs but hopefully they at least kinda map onto the actual books

[skrunksthatwunk]

kiryu you were not about to write that on your bucket list you lying faker you gay ass homosexual man

#infinite wealth spoilers #look personally i do think he likes cabaret clubs #but like. to make friends. and to talk to people in a somewhat formulaic setting #and i figure he's been to so many that it's not high on his end-of-life priority list to like. do that more #he wouldn't be seeking his last nut he'd be going to the human equivalent of a cat cafe #kiryu when he fucking lies.png #he's probably joking here but along with the 'yeah of course i've proposed before' thing i think he's just. really trying to fit in #which is so sad. girl you're dying let yourself be gay #if you look at it that way the loss of the dress up abilities he got in gaiden is actually kinda heartbreaking like. peepaw can't be #anonymously cunty anymore. he's gone back to being kiryu. to being the dragon of dojima. and as much pain as that title has caused him #he's still worried about looking cool. earlier in this scene he's talking about letting that go and eating eggs n shit but like #it doesn't go away completely and i don't think it will. obviously i don't think the re-closeting thing is particularly intended #tis a niche reading but it's one that makes me very very emo. kiryuuuuuu i love youuuuuu what the fuckkk AUGHHHRH #ehatever anyway #rgg #ryu ga gotoku #kiryu kazuma #nyarla dni

[anxious-witch]

Besties, one day you are gonna eat your favorite breakfast and really taste it again. And you'll know it's gonna be okay ❤️

#rio rambles #it's me I am besties #and this is directly related to the fact I love bread with butter ham and boiled egg #but I can't stomach it most mornings bc I get into a very bad habit of not eating breakfast when my mental health is bad #but then one day I just wake up and go oh! I wanna eat it now #and it always tastes like the best thing ever and everything in the world seems a bit brighter #anyway sorry for this random post I am making it mostly as a reminder to myself

[sleep-nurse]

my period is definitely around the corner no wonder why i feel like los miserables and crave so much junk food

#sunflower rambles #i can't wait to suffer and bleed 3 liters #why must my body make eggs just to throw them all my life #literally the only time i manage to eat more is when my period is coming #then i eat nothing again

[oculusxcaro]

👀

Send 👀 to find out how much my muse would like to _____ yours

Get to know: NEVER! | I'd rather not | Convince me! | Sure why not? | Yes please! | ALWAYS! Befriend: NEVER! | I'd rather not | Convince me! | Sure why not? | Yes please! | ALWAYS! Date: NEVER! | I'd rather not | Convince me! | Sure why not? | Yes please! | ALWAYS! Make love with: NEVER! (respectfully) | I'd rather not | Convince me! | Sure why not? | Yes please! | ALWAYS! Hook up with: NEVER! | I'd rather not | Convince me! | Sure why not? | Yes please! | ALWAYS! Protect: NEVER! | I'd rather not | Convince me! | Sure why not? | Yes please! | ALWAYS! Help: NEVER! | I'd rather not | Convince me! | Sure why not? | Yes please! | ALWAYS! Stop: NEVER! | I'd rather not | Convince me! | Sure why not? | Yes please! | ALWAYS! Kill: NEVER! | I'd rather not | Convince me! | Sure why not? | Yes please! | ALWAYS!

Wally was pretty cute, Khare would give him that. He'd caused quite the stir during his first visit when he ordered all the eggs and bacon, and by that, he really did mean all the eggs and bacon. He ate enough to feed a small army and effectively broke the breakfast menu that day, a record that had not been broken before (and after) he walked through the diner doors that day. They hadn't interacted much beyond Wally stopping by for breakfast but Khare found his visits entertaining enough. He was funny, kind-hearted and a real sweetheart even going as far as taking all the dirty dishes back to the kitchens so she didn't have to carry them. She'd insisted it was her job, but before she could blink an eye, the plates were all gone and by the time she got to the kitchen to see where they'd actually gone, they were all sparkling clean, standing up in their racks ready to be reused again. It still had her scratching her head, just how Wally gotten the plates to the kitchen out back so fast and washed them, disappearing only to leave money for his bill with tip included. She'd really love to get to know him more the next time he showed up at Pauli's, if he showed up again.

#celerem #memes ;; how much my muse would x yours #Sorry this was a bit short! #It was fun to answer though #Listen tho Dianne we have got to interact more #I LOVE your Wally and honestly still laughing about their interaction before #Can't believe that was way much in August where the hell does the time go? #Hopefully you were okay with this response #I figured Wally was in his civilian duds and Khare's not quite bright or savvy enough to guess anything more than he was just REALLY hungry #Eating a hundred plus eggs and a stack of bacon 😂 #Khare: It was a bit of an odd order but nothing unusual... right? #Sorry Wally she won't sleep with you #She doesn't know it (yet) but she likes the DILFS #She'll have eggs and bacon for you anyday though!

[frecklystars]

Me cooking dinner for everyone (all my Ryan F/Os) Ken has to come by with another plate and I’m like “didn’t I just give you an entire burger” and Ken says yeah but he needs another because K took his food and then Luke says “yeah he ate my food too” and K is at the table in tears shoving spoonfuls of fresh veggies and meat in his mouth openly weeping “I’ve been eating nothing but instant protein-grub noodles and rice for my entire life Please just Let me Have This I Beg of You”

#i burn the eggs by accident he says no problem and still eats them saying they’re amazing #meanwhile ken is having trouble trying to eat the food that isn’t plastic #he’s like what do you mean I can’t just imagine taking a bite. oh god. this burger is huge. how do I fit my mouth around it #Six is absolutely housing an entire stack of pancakes all by himself in the corner of the room he’s not letting anyone have it #Colt is butting heads with him #no I don’t know Colt yet but he’s included. what food does he like? don’t know yet... MY COOKING #I can’t cook for shit but I’ll learn for my hungry boys <3 #that was painful to type I’ll never say that again Lmfao #i make apple pie just for driver bc I know he likes it #driver nuzzles me the entire time I’m baking he’s snuggly asf. he’s exhausted too #stayed up all night on a getaway job. knows I stayed up all night having nightmares and being unable to sleep again #he gets it. he doesn't force me to try to sleep he knows i can't. but he encourages me to lay down after cooking #and to rest my eyes for a bit. and then it turns into a huge snuggle pile #we've got [counting on fingers] one two three... ten... a dozen Gosling F/Os #one of my best friends says it's like a flock of baby geese following me around SLKDFJSLFSDF #so fucking cute #Luke is canonically snuggly. idk Jacob or Holland yet... I'd want them to cuddle too #all of them are trying to have contact w/ me in SOME way once we're snuggled in bed #Ken's gotta hold my hand and put his head on my tummy HE'S GOTTA. or he'll PERISH #Lars isn't one for touch very often unless if he's the right person. I am that Right Person #but he will still just hold my hand and let everyone else do the full body snuggling #K's sitting up just like Six is when he's resting. alert. protective #Six is relieved he doesn't have to tie his shoelace to the door or worry abt intruders. he can just fall the fuck ASLEEP #they've all got full tummies and maybe some of them chat with each other #while others are like SHH LET KERI SLEEP. but im like no no your voices are like angels to me pls keep talking #esp Luke and Sebastian their rasps will lull me easily #love notes

[bloody-shadow666]

ate some strawberry yoplait and my mouth isn't swelling up so either yoplait uses fake ass strawberry chunks or my allergy was maybe temporary? Or maybe I'm just not allergic to THESE strawberries. will have to conduct more experiments. but first I think I want to experiment with eggs again because I'd kill for a breakfast burrito

#i know that strawberries can trigger mast cell instability and cause an allergic reaction that isnt the same as like #someone being normally allergic to peanuts or something #And it comes and goes #And there are theories that one of my other conditions is caused by a minor form of MCAS so I'm already possibly predisposed to that #Idk man strawberries are weird #In case anyone was ever wondering though Starburst uses real strawberry juice in their strawberry flavored starburst #skittles does not. #As for eggs i am allergic to egg yolk but only in the cooked form of normal egg #I can have it baked into foods just fine I just can't eat like. Scrambled eggd

[knifegremliin]

okay i think i really gotta stop having scrambled eggs because oh god The Consequences

#🔪.text #fuckkkkk dude. #Why Did I Do That #when i've already been having Digestive Issues most mornings #fuckkkkk #i am not gonna tmi but oh Dear Lord. #scrambled eggs why do you hate me so much :( #i can have hard boiled eggs!!! #i can have fried eggs!! (most of the time) #WHY CAN'T I HAVE SCRAMBLED EGGS #WHY DO THEY MAKE MY STOMACH WANT TO REMOVE ALL OF ITS CONTENTS IMMEDIATELY #but it's not all the time!!! #it is probably like 70% of the time but there are times where i digest them fine! #AGH #I JUST WANNA EAT SCRAMBLED EGGS THEY ARE TASTY #UNFAIR.

[mesaryth]

found out after whisking for ten minutes that you can't make meringue in plastic bowls (fine whatever) but I didn't wanna waste it so now im making the world's smallest portion of eyeballed angel cake

#also why does every website have an answer for what to do if your meringue turns out to be runny and not what to do if you can't get stiff #peaks. theyre all like grab new eggs well i don't wanna waste food girl!!! and im not frying a sweet egg!!! #i have low hopes for the angel cake but don't worry as long as it's cooked im eating it