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#cant believe my mom is going to be cancelled wow
winderlylandchime · 6 months
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1/3 And we are officially at the last episode of S4! I actually cant believe this ngl. Just so you know: our parents told him to leave them alone with the fake gays because they were out on a date and our uncle is now invested into the i love you scene that is supposed to happen but ‘just please don’t tell your mom, i promised her I wouldn’t feed into this shit’ so basically one thing is for sure: we are all equally scared of our mom when it comes to the show but only my brother has zero fucks about it. ‘Okay, i am ready! So this is what I need to happen: Blondie goes to Canada or whatever to surprise them, Brian tells him he loves him after he finishes the ride. And..that’s kinda all I care about’ ‘oh god, did they actually make them ride across Canada?! Id quit. GO BRIAN! I now have a weird urge to put on a silly outfit and some pride flags and ride a bike. GO BRI BRI!’ And we are at the border scene ‘wow a cop being a homophobe? Never seen that before. AW BRIAN IS BEING ALL CUTE AND SUPPORTIVE! I fucking love him’ ‘ugh HES STILL IN LA?! I THOUGHT WE WERE ON OUR WAY BACK BLONDIE! Blondie please go home because this is killing me. I need Brian and Justin back together pleaseeeee, this is ruining my mood. HE HAS A MOVIE IN THE MAKING!! Now go back to your man! NO YOU FUCKING ASS DONT CANCEL HIS FLIGHT WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS FUCKING SHIT! BLONDIE NO! HE CAN CELEBRATE WITH HIS MAN!’ And we are at the barn scene. ‘Aw Teddy, you’ll be okay without the meeting. You have Emy!’ Brian just brought the cake ‘AWWW BRIAN GOT THEM A CAKE! AWWW TO THE NOVOTNEY BRUCKNERS! AND A….band. HE DOES CARE! HE FUCKING CARES SO MUCH! This is growth baby! I am so close to him confessing his love! AND HES DANCING! YEAAAAH BABY I AM FINALLY WINNING THIS EPISODE FOR SURE!’ ‘Emmett is taking Ted to an AA meeting! AW! This finale is all about friends and love and growth! I fucking love this! Now bring me blondie back!’ And the scene where Brian falls is about to happen ‘look at Bri Bri..(repeats after Mikey) you are dude? What the fuck is up with Mike? Brian.. OH MY GOD BRIAN! IS HE OKAY?! HE BROKE WHAT?! This wouldnt happen with Blondie! So cancer AND a broken bone?!’ ‘Oh fuck she went into labor? Well fuck. I guess we will have two big events this episode. A baby and i love you’ (honestly his delusion is inspiring) ‘WHAT THE FUCK IS BRIAN DOING?! GET OFF THE FUCKING BIKE! Tell him Mike! Brian what kind of pissing contest are you in?!’ ‘WHY HASNT ANYONE TOLD JUSTIN?! JUSTIN GO HOME! I hate la. Blondie, go home your man is injured…again.. STAY?! NO. GO HOME BLONDIE. Wait what is happening?! NO NO NO NO SIX-EIGHT MONTHS?! BUT BRIAN! and who is this actor dude? FUCK THIS PLACE! Blondie go home, your man is injured!’ He is completely stressed out at the idea of Justin in LA. I am talking stressed out as if it’s happening to him. ‘Oh Ted and Emy are lost. Well shit, this would be us. He’s doing a meeting! This is why i love them as friends. I fucking love Emmett!’ ‘BRIAN IS NOT ACTUALLY RIDING THE FUCKING RIDE WITH ONE HAND. BABY COME ON! *he is sitting on the edge of the couch with his hands in his hair stressed out* Why is he doing this to himself? And to ME?! What is he trying to prove? Blondie would’ve collected his ass by now and had him in a car but nooooo he has to be in fucking LA. Fuck LA. Brian you are killing me and breaking my heart. And this fucking song doesnt help!’ And Brian starts hallucinating ‘wait..is he imagining himself.. judging him? What? BLONDIE *starts to kick his feet like a little kid* OH MY GOD HE IS IMAGINING JUSTIN CHEERING HIM ON?! OH MY FUCKING GOD YES! And Bri Bri, I am standing right there next to him! HE IS SO TOTALLY TELLING HIM HE LOVES HIM! Fucking LA ruined everything this episode. What is he trying to prove? Brian come on’
Okay please don’t tell your mom I exist because I’m legit scared of her too and I don’t want her to know about my role in encouraging this madness.
Your brother yelling at the screen during this episode is everything.
Emmett making an AA meeting for Ted always makes me cry. He really is the purest kindest soul on this show.
LA ruined everything in THIS episode? Oh god, he will not survive S5.
Also Brian with the bike helmet… it’s like hair and makeup wanted Brian to still have a hairstyle under the helmet and stuck those pieces of hair out and it totally bothers me. It’s a small pet peeve.
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8xwdc · 3 years
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my mom’s spicy opinions on the grid
(my mom has been following F1 avidly for like, decades (i grew up in a lewis hamilton household) and these are her opinions. please do not cancel me. this has been a psa.) 
lewis hamilton: (delight, extreme heart eyes) “my LOVE. he’s yummy and i would trust him with my life. GREATEST of all time” 
valtteri bottas: “very persistent. i just want good things for him.” 
max verstappen: (a glare) “he looks like he’s unnamed nazi #2 in a movie. excellent driver now though.” 
alex albon: "a good driver. mentally strong to put up with christian horner giving him the orphan treatment.”
charles leclerc: “he looks cute but he gives me a dumb vibe. great driver but he’s too desperate sometimes.” 
sebastian vettel: (a sigh) “not my favourite driver...but ferrari needs to stop messing with his voodoo doll”
lando norris: (a glare) “i hate him. he is a pretentious, entitled, child who thinks he is an adult. decent driver.”
carlos sainz: “he looks better in red.”
daniel ricciardo: (delighted gasp) “SO AMAZING. attractive. positive. great attitude. would have got a WDC if it weren’t for redbull” 
esteban ocon: “yet another driver who got screwed because of stroll” 
lance stroll: (big sigh) “i pray to god everyday that he retires. he’s like the kraken eating up careers of other driveres” 
sergio perez: “great driver. another one who got screwed because of stroll.” 
pierre gasly: “SO CUTE. redbull phoenix - resurrected even though christian horner tried to burn him.” 
kimi raikkonen: “OH I LOVE HIM. his expressions are priceless and he is an amazing driver.” 
antonio giovinazzi: “who?”
george russell: “wasting his life away in a williams. i think he’s praying every day that he was in a mercedes. ” 
nicolas latifi: “he doesn’t deserve a comment” 
BONUS: 
nico rosberg: (i could not write this because my mom left the room as she does everytime someone mentions He Must Not Be Named) 
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savoies · 4 years
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50 questions.
i was tagged by @cartrshart. thank you ash, ive been wanting to do this one. (:
1) what is the color of your hairbrush? - one is purple and one is white+pink. 2) name a food you never eat? -cow head or tongue. its popular in Mexican culture but its not for me.
3) are you typically too warm or too cold?
- my body is super warm always like always that my family cant even place their hand on my shoulder when its hot outside.
4) what were you doing 45 minutes ago?
- i was working on cast my mutuals on my main account. 5) what’s your favorite candy bar? kit kat. 6) have you ever been to a professional sports game? yes! i used to go to a lot as a kid cause my uncle used to get tickets. i went to many angels games, an indoor football game, and when i was seven i went to my first hockey game. but recently i went to a devils and leafs game(both against the ducks) in march. the devils game was the first game i went to after i started liking the nhl. 7) what is the last thing you said out loud? - ¨ merrimack keeps sending me emails even though they dont have my major.¨ telling my mom after reading my school emails. 8) what is your favorite ice cream? either cookies & cream or cookie dough. (wow ash exactly the same oop) 9) what was the last thing you had to drink? water. (: 10) do you like your wallet?
- yeah i have been wanting a smaller wallet for a while and i finally got it a while back.
11) what is the last thing you ate? Neapolitan ice cream. 12) did you buy any new clothes last weekend? actually i did! i bought a waterproof jacket, a Hawaiian shirt, a half zipper sweater, and a t-shirt. (: yard sale things oop. 13) what’s the last sporting event you watched? i believe it was game 2 with my mom. 14)what is your favorite flavor of popcorn? movie theater popcorn with movie theater butter jsjs. 15) who is the last person you sent a text message to? i rarely text anyone outside of tumblr. rori. @andreisvechnigod love you <3 
16) ever go camping? yes! we have an annual camping trip that we’ve gone on for about for more than five years.but it got canceled this year. :( 17) do you take vitamins? nope. 18) do you regularly attend a place of worship? yes ma’am. i grew up religious and then like i hated my church(cause the people were like hypocrites oop) but then my parents took us to another church and i like it there a lot. a lot of cute guys lol. the vibe is great. every sunday (: 19) do you have a tan? does a bad tan line count? 20) do you prefer Chinese or pizza? depends but usually Chinese.  21) do you drink your soda through a straw? if its from restaurants then yes but if its straight outta the can then no. 22) what color socks do you usually wear? black with a colored line and colored letters of the brand at the bottom. 23) do you ever drive above the speed limit? cant drive ahaha. 24) what terrifies you? all of the above, heights, bugs, public speaking, etc. 25) look to your left, what do you see? fan. 26) what chore do you hate most? deep cleaning the whole house. 27) what do you think of when you hear an Australian accent? g’day mate 28) what’s your favorite soda? dr. pepper 29) do you go in a fast food place or just hit the drive thru? drive thru all the way, my social anxiety cant handle going in. 30) what’s your favorite number? 11 cause of my birthday or 21. 31) last person you talked to?
my mom.
32) favorite cut of beef? idk? ahaha. 33)last song you listened to? driving to Hawaii by summer salt but im currently listening to she looks so perfect by 5sos. 34) last book you read? for school outliers but on my own a crime book and the last song by Nicholas sparks. 35) favorite day of the week?  Saturday. 36) can you say the alphabet backwards? no. 37)how do you like your coffee? more creamer than coffee, i know. :\ 38) favorite pair of shoes? my velcro vanz probs or the basic old school vanz or dark blue converse. 39) time you normally get up? 5:30am if i go on a hike if not 7:45 for school. weekends it depends anywhere from 10am to 2pm oop. sundays at 8 if i go to church. 40)what do you prefer, sunrise or sunsets? sunsets but if you have the chance to see a sunrise they're pretty cool too. 41)how many blankets on your bed? 2 small throws. 42) describe your kitchen plates? black and the bigger ones are jade blue with a black border. 43) describe your kitchen at the moment? tidy messy oop. 44) do you have a favorite alcoholic drink? im a minor. (margaritas are chill though) non alcoholic of course. 45) do you play cards? we play different card games with my family sometimes. 46) what color is your car? dont have one. cant drive but both of my parents are a type of gray and id like a black one probs. 47) can you change a tire? with assistance maybe? my dad has shown us the basics once when we broke down in the freeway at 9pm.  48) your favorite state? i live in CA and its really all i know but i love utah and i really want to see Colorado and the east coast. 49) favorite job you’ve had? due to a personal reason i cant have a job rn. so none since ive never had one lol. 50) this one is long so ill understand if you skip it lol. @hartsyhart @seggy-seggs @andreisvechnigod @kncny @farabees @leeqianxiao @jmaybanks(also sorry if youve done it already.)
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CYBERVERSE WATCH: S3 Episode 13, 14, 15, 16
Episode 13
MACCADAM IS MY GRANDPA NOW
Jetfire!!! And Skybite!!! Skybite’s got a great laugh
Oh wow the cloaking still protects them? Nice!
CAN SOMEONE PLEASE FIX PERCY’S EYES, WHERE THE FRICK IS RATCHET
A MULTIVERSE DRIVE???
PLEASE...PLEASE LET US SEE OTHER UNIVERSES??? OTHER UNIVERSES PLEASE????
SPARE SOME MULTIVERSE STUFF FOR A POOR SOUL???
I mean as it stands, the fact that Cyberverse is talking about this stuff is more than satisfying, man I frickin love this show
“We can launch those squiggly things into a whole ‘nother universe!” his delivery of that line was so good and also Wheeljack pls, then it’ll be another version of you’s problem
MEGATRON REALLY *IS* POUTING, MEGATRON YOU BIG BABY
Maccadam fondly but watching them talk about their battle plans makes me feel so bad for him...
AW MAN IS MEGATRON GONNA CHUCK OPTIMUS INTO A DIFFERENT UNIVERSE
About time you showed up you big pouting pansy
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Man these two totally were ex boyfriends
LMAO ARCEE AND SHADOW-STRIKER’S EVIL LAUGHS, THAT”S SO DELIGHTFUL
That Titan should just smack them out of the sky tbh
SKULLCRUNCHER THE CROC...NICE
I love that Soundwave and Roddy are manning the controls
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“Commanders command. And you forget, we have backup” CUTE...CUTE....CUTE!!!
I’M SO PROUD OF MY BOYS!!!!!!
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BEE!!!It’s been so long since I’ve seen you! I love my little yellow boy!!! Please take care of your dad Bee
OH NO IT”S CREEPY TENTACLE DOCTOR
GOTH GIRL AND PREP GIRL!!! 
MAN I JUST KNOW SOMETHING’S GOING TO GO HORRIFICALLY WRONG HERE
FRICK NOT THIS DUDE AGAIN
AW MAN NOT A WHOLE BUNCH AT ONCE
YEAAAHHHHH WHEELJACK AND MEGATRON WORKING TOGETHER!!! NICE
Two Decepticons and one Autobot...not a good sign
Oh shoot it’s the DECEPTICONS who wanna universe-jump, MEGATRON COME ON DUDE YOU DIDN’T EVEN TAKE YOUR ARMY WITH YOU DUMMY
OH NO!!!!!!
“It’s time for the commanders to join the battle” MAN YOU’RE SO COOL RODDY (YOU TOO SOUNDWAVE)
OH SHOOT THERE GOES THE TOWER
WELL FRICK
DON”T “WE DID IT” HOT ROD YOUR DAD IS IN THAT WRECKAGE
“Quintessons: Inferior. Cybertronians: Superior” MAN I”LL NEVER GET TIRED OF THAT
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HE”S SO COOL!!!!! FIST BUMP BUDDIES!!! Man I’m so over the moon that these two wound up getting along
You know I’m suddenly having a revelation: I wonder if they could somehow re-activate all those other Soundwaves to help them against the (inevitable) final battle I’m sure they’re gonna have
WHAT THE FRICK
ARE YOU FRICKIN KIDDING ME
Starscream: CANCELED, CANCELED, YOU”RE ALL CANCELED
Well, Megatron certainly got the heck out of dodge at the right time lmao
Episode 14
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I legit thought they were going to do an ATLA ref for half a second
Oh my gosh is this an Autobot recruitment video???
“The universe. You ever thought about it?” GOSH THIS VIDEO....
I’m frickin cackling, the Quintessons were like “Hmm, what’s the worst thing we could possibly inflict on this planet?” then went “Oh, of course, Starscream”
WHY DIDN”T YOU JUST LET GO STARSCREAM
Wow Starscream really did just sell out his entire planet huh
SOUNDWAVE NO!!!!! JEEZ HE GOT EVERYONE
Jeez and Starscream has to share with two other faces, that sucks
Lmao Starscream is just like “Nah judging people is what I was born for”
UNSPACE??? UH OK
WAIT isn’t that what Wheeljack made a few episodes ago????
LMAO HE’S GONNA WAIT TIL HE CAN GET OPTIMUS AND MEGATRON TOO bless Starscream and his pettiness
“First I must witness their humiliation!” STARSCREAM PLEASE the Quintessons really got the worst Judge
OHHH WHAT’S HE GONNA DO
SOUNDWAVE YOU’RE SO POWERFUL!!!!!
OH NO HE GOT THEM AGAIN....
GOSH I ACTUALLY GASPED WHEN THEY BROKE SOUNDWAVE’S AUDIO THING, NO!!!
“Well, it did for one of us, and it only takes one Autobot to make a difference” Bee? Whirl??? Wheeljack???
WINDBLADE!!! EVEN BETTER!!! The person with the braincell!!!
I love that Rodimus doesn’t even look worried, he just sighs like “aw man not this loser again”
On the one hand: Worried about my boys On the other: Man I love these two being buds
Also: Not To Be That Guy But it looks like Soundwave’s wearing white thigh-highs with little orange hearts on them and it’s VERY distracting
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“You two work so well together!!!” OH NO OH NO OH NO ARE THEY GONNA FUSE THEM TOGETHER OR SOMETHING
THOSE HEAD MASKS ARE SO DISTURBING
uh oh what kind of loop is this
THE PLAGUE OF RUST OH NO
oh my gosh STARSCREAM’S MAKING THEM DO A BUFFING LOOP...THAT’S REALLY THE WORST THING YOU COULD THINK OF STARSCREAM....
“WHERE ARE MEGATRON AND OPTIMUS PRIME” well Optimus is under a pile of concrete, so
Lmao thank you for your peanut-gallery commentary Kup
OH SHOOT THEY DID JUMP THROUGH THE MULTIVERSE BRIDGE
MAN THAT LOOKS SO FRICKIN COOL???? YO SHOUTOUT TO THE BACKGROUND ARTISTS WHO WORKED ON THIS SHOW, YOU ROCK
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SERIOUSLY IM IN LOVE WITH THAT I hope whoever did the background art shares their work online sometime, I’ll be ALL over that
AHH I ALWAYS FORGET HOW SHORT THESE EPISODES ARE
Excuse me, Jeremy Levy as WHO???
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Episode 15
Kup you are an...interesting commentator choice lmao
MACCADAM..... :(
Windblade please save our favorite Grandpa
wINDBLADE!
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HOW’S IT FEEL BEING THE COOLEST KID ON THE BLOCK WINDBLADE
Wait I *JUST* noticed the title calls this “Bumblebee: Cyberverse Adventures” ???? IS THAT NEW
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CALL ME A SUCKER BUT WINDBLADE CRACKING HER NECK AND TELLING THE LITTLE SHARK DUDES TO BRING IT ON WAS QUITE POSSIBLY ONE OF THE BEST MOMENTS OF THE SERIES SO FAR
Windblade: *does anything* Me: IM GAY
“I don’t do fear” GOSH I LOVE MY TALENTED GIRL
OH NO!!! OH NO!!!! WINDBLADE NO!!!!!
AND HER WINGS TOO??? WHY!!!!
MACCADAM HELP HER OUT COME ON DUDE WHAT HAPPENED TO NO FIGHTING
lmao rip at the dude crushed by the juke box
Wait I thought they already woke up Iaconus??
YEAH!!!!!!!! MACCADAM AND WINDBLADE TEAMING UP
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“UNFORGIVABLE CRIMES AGAINST ME!” LMAO I LOVE THAT LITERALLY EVERYONE IS TUNING OUT STARSCREAM get rekt Starscream.
Not to rag on people who like Starscream because I like him too but me @ Starscream stans tbh 
You guys just need to hold hands! I mean seriously, come on you guys!
STARSCREAM QUINTESSONS OMG I just noticed they’re all wearing Starscream’s colors pffft
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AW.....MACCADAM’S FIRST HIGH-FIVE....:’) I bet Windblade and Maccadam both give the best hugs and best high-fives 
They’re so cute MAN I love Cyberverse!!!! I love how sweet these characters are!!!
A psychic trap??? Hoo boy
Windblade: How do I defeat this psychic trap? Maccadam: Well, it would help if you had any bug or dark-type Pokemon on you.
“Or you could just tell me!” I JUST SAID THAT TOO LMAO gosh I love the writing on this show
OHHH I LOVE THE CONTRAST OF IACONUS’ BRAIN WITH BEE’S BRAIN IN SEASON ONE, THAT”S SO GOOD
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OH LMAO HE MEANT HER SWORD I thought he meant like “your inner-strength” or “your wisdom” NO HE MEANT “USE YOUR SWORD WINDBLADE” LOL
OHHH SPOOKY VOICE, I DIG IT
Wow Starscream’s really reading out his 1000 page long call-out post to a captive audience
LMAO THEY”RE JUST LISTING OUT DATE LOCATIONS
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CHROMIA IS SO CUTE!!!!!!!! AHHH
OH NO ARCEE!!!!
I LOVE ARCEE, “HIT ME WITH YOUR BEST SHOT YOU BASTARD”
OH SHOOT JK I GUESS THEY REALLY DIDN”T TOTALLY WAKE HIM  UP LAST TIME I was wondering why he was just an arm
TITAN TIME!!!
Episode 16
To toast the flares off a neutron star....cute....
Wouldn’t it be cute if Kup was telling this story to a bunch of baby Cybertronians
Awh....Maccadam I’m sorry your old Titan had to re-awaken :(
“Too bad I won’t know how it ends” OH NO ARE YOU GUYS GONNA KILL OFF MACCADAM???? NO!!!!
Iaconus looks frickin RAD I’m sure Hasbro will make a killing off his toys
Speaking of I really hope they release Cyberverse on DVD in a bundle-pack
“War Titan, do NOT ignore me!” YEAH USE YOUR MOM VOICE ON HIM WINDBLADE!!!
LOVE THAT ROCK MUSIC
“This has never happened before” now THERE’S an interesting tidbit
OH NO....ITS THE OTHER TITAN....CROATON....
on the one hand, I’m SO glad we’re getting the Titan battle I crave, but on the other, CROATON NO!!!
TRIFORCE BEAM!!!
I love that Windblade is Jaeger-ing this frickin Titan solo
WHOOPS THERE GOES THE STADIUM
“Optimus had a fight of his own...with gravity!” oh how the mighty have fallen Optimus lmao
I wonder how this wonky universe would handle a flier
JUST THROW A BUILDING AT A TITAN, NBD
SOMEONE PLEASE CATCH ARCEE
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THANKS GRIMLOCK
THERE’S RATCHET Finally, I was wondering where he was
“Well it’s not my fault this won’t be a fair fight” OH SHOOT THERE IT IS!!! THERE IT IS
I can’t believe Starscream is trying to back-seat drive this fight lmao
SOUNDWAVE NO!!!! Oh thank goodness they’re ok
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OH NO OH NO
IS THIS IT IS HE GONNA DIE?? MAC DONT GIVE IN TO FATE!!!  NO!!!
MAC NO!!!!!!!!!! MAC YOU DIDN”T HAVE TO DIE NO!!! YOU LITERALLY DID NOT HAVE TO STAND THERE AND GET BLASTED WHY DID YOU DO THAT!!!!!!!
“My last citizen...he is gone” FRICK IM GONNA START CRYING
Quints > Murdered Croaton's citizens most likely > Enslave Croaton > Inadvertently kill Iaconus' last citizen (WHICH HURT BECAUSE WE'RE MADE TO ASSUME IACONUS ONLY CARES ABOUT WAR BUT NO, HE LOVES HIS CITIZENS DEEP DOWN) > BEHEAD IACONUS LIKE, WHY YOU GOTTA STAB ME IN THE HEART LIKE THIS
Wheeljack you’re so smart but ALSO IM STILL CRYING OVER MACCADAM
“Hehe, you’re a nasty little fella” NICE JOB COWBOY
OH NO ALL THE SOUNDWAVES DANGIT I KNEW IT
AND HE”S A BIG LIAR HE DID HAVE SOME BLUE SOUNDWAVES
OH NO WHAT ABOUT WINDBLADE
HECK THAT”S SUCH A BAD PLACE TO STOP BUT I CANT WATCH ANY MORE EPISODES RN I GOTTA STAGGER THIS SERIES
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hey-hamlet · 5 years
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BNHA AU Ideas : Happy Famlies
Also on AO3!
TL;DR: This AU is exactly what is sounds like. Everyone gets a happy family. 
Feat. Dadmight, and his sons Izuku and Tenko, Big Bro Dabi with his little bro, Shinson and his Dadzawa.
allmight n inko end up dating and tenko n izu are brothers
dabi and tenko are third year ua herocourse students when izu and the others join
tenko is a soft sunshine boy cause izu rubbed off on him a lot
dabi wants to be an underground hero so he'll never be like his father
todoroki takes the entrance exam so inasa and hitoshi are recommendation students
izuku kills the exam because he starts ua being able to use full cowl 5%, breaking allmights record with a whopping 130 points
because consider dabi, shouto, izu, tenko and hitoshi all singing karaoke together, dabi has a tambourine and tenko is violently shaking maracas
izuku and inko dont know toshi is allmight, but tenko and toshi are terrible liars
the first time toshi meets izuku its just tenko presenting him saying "you gotta give it to him dad"
izu is only 5 n still broken up about having no quirk, toshi says he might just be a late bloomer while tenko nods
toshi sneaks izuku his quirk when he turns 7, izuku wakes up n accidentally punches a hole in the ceiling, he n katsuki make up cause izuku has a bomb ass quirk even if it does break his bones
he and inko just think he was a late bloomer cause his quirk was so strong. tenko and toshi highfive
seven year old izuku walking back into his house like mom i broke both my arms again :(((
katsuki actually helps him work out the flick thing
"it breaks my arms!" "then use less you dumb fuck!" "oh yeah actually thank you"
they’re so used to shouting criticisms while sparring that they still do it after they enter ua
when they spar at the sports festival mic can’t get a word of commentary in bc it’s just a constant slew of
“kACCHAN I TOLD U TO STOP LEADING WITH UR RIGHT”
“SHIITY DEKU IF U LAND LIKE THAT UR GONNA BREAK UR LEGS”
dabi n tenko the third years can hear them in their own stadium. tenko is cheering softly, dabi has a heart attack when he sees the walls of ice
izu has a massive handshapped scar on his wrist from when tenko saved him by pulling him out of the way of a car
he doesnt mind it but it makes tenko sad so he wears a lil cuff over it
tenko snuck in to watch the entrance exam he n toshinori are cheering quietly, the other teachers just sigh
izuku broke allmights record for points scored in the entrance exam but hes still scared he failed
tenko wants to s c r e a m
USJ ANGST TIME
starts as normal students enter, villains arrive kurogiri has an ear piece and is talking with afo directly, some of the 8 prefects goons are there too
hitoshi used his quirk on kurogiri to find out who they are, but is targeted after that and the villains know not to respond
the students are scattered, its izu/tsuyu and hitoshi. they do the whirlpool thing w/o the sitcking, hitoshi instructs them to tread water and not to move
hitoshi is nearing quirk overuse, tsuyu is shaken, izu is pretty much ok
aizawa is fighting the villains as normal, the nomu arrives
hitoshi tries to mind control the nomu, kurogiri attempts to direct one of the nomus punches to hitoshi, aizawa cancels the portal, severing one of the nomus arms. its grows back, aizawa is beaten
izuku charges forward, fighting the nomu with a higher percentage of full cowl than he can safely use but they are evenly matched
todoroki shows up, cant help because the two are moving so fast he cant aim his quirk and not hit mido
he and hitoshi keep kurogiri busy
before allmight arrives, dabi and tenko do, after seeing tenya running towards the school
izuku can barely move, over using his quirk to the point that he has countless micro fractures and the nomu has landed a few punches, and he took others to protect aizawa
tenko yells at dabi to grab izuku, kurogiri mentions that his master killed tenkos family and hes pissed
he cant stand up to the nomu but shouto makes an opening and he and dabi try to damage it as best they can, shouto has to hold izuku down to stop him from joining the fight again
allmight arrives, quickly dispatches the nomu, turns on Kurogiri
so tenko, allmight and a shaky izu are all facing down kurogiri while afo is trying to convince him to keep fighting
reinforcements arrive and kuro nopes out
as soon as the portal closes, izuku collapses and tenko n allmight rush over, shouto is grabbing onto dabi and hitoshi is trying to get aizawa to respond
hitoshi, crying, has to ask dabi to pick up his dad because his arms are shaking to bad hes scared he might drop him
tenko has no gloves anymore and he cant touch izuku and hes just lost, shouto wraps an arm around him and hitoshi n they cry as dabi takes aizawa and allmight takes izuku to recovery girl
aizawa n izu in the same hospital, hitoshi tells him what izuku did n aizawa fucking, breaks out of bed like a jackass to call him a problem child then fucking limps back
less depressingly, happy families dabi and tenko do "get help" from Thor Ragnarok
"gET heLP hEs BUrnINg UP"
aizawa : "kids that movie is like 240 years old"
izuku : "so... you know it then?"
aizawa: "fuck"
nighteye and gran torino are izuku and tenko's terrible uncles
he stars school at 5%, internships is 10%, camp gets him up to 15% so hes around 25% at the eri rescue
ochako being a terrible influence on kirishima
“uraraka i like katsuki. what do”
“push it down”
“what”
“pUSH UR FEELINGS Down”
also happy families shouto actually interns w nighteye n izu because dabi said he was an ass so no death thanks
one person asks izuku what his quirk is
he pauses
"aaaaaaaaaa"
"hm"
"my mum has minor levitation and my dad is quirkless"
izuku pauses again.
"wait"
"wait im not toshis biologically"
"waiT Who WAs My FirST Dad?"
shouto thinks inko has an affair w allmight then married his secretary but izuku met toshinori through tenko so he just lays down on the floor and screams
shouto’s brain is going to explode one day
consider tenko and izuku looking soft and pure but you turn around and suddenly you dont have a wallet and your food is gone
happy family izuku and kastuki were eachothers first kiss but in a dumb ass way
izuku was like "i need to ruin my frist kiss so the next one will be better"
"wow me too, you seem like the worlds worst option!"
"cool!"
they both almost gagged afterwards
tenko walked in on them violently scrubbing their lips
“wow katsuki who was ur first kiss”
bakugou stares off fondly into the distance
“deku :))”
"it was fucking terrible" wistful sigh
izuku, blushing happily: “id never do it again”
izuku: "yeah i scrubbed my face until it bleed so none of my skin would be tainted"
first week of 1a, someone asking izuku if he and katsuki are/were dating so izuku asks ochako to launch him into the sun
no matter how many people they date everyone always insists that katsuki and izuku are dating each other
izuku is actually dating shouto but no one believes him for some reason
dabi and hitoshi find it so funny
please consider dabi being the frontrunner of these rumours, like these random first years will come up to izuku while he’s eating lunch with shouto and they’ll be in t e a r s
“wHY ARE YOU CHEATING ON BAKUGOU SENPAI?”
izuku starts crying
shouto, totally deadpan: "i thought our love was real, izu-chan"
izuku wheezes
they have a katsudeku fan club and shouto’s the mascot
dabi is in it. hes a full hero at this point but nezu gave him a pass so he could attend
they have weekly meetings
it’s dabi, shouto, kirishima and like twenty first year girls from every class
shouto, in a deadpan voice: “good morning girls today i saw katsuki and izuku sharing bread. discuss”
kirishima is one of the most popular fanartists
tenko loves the meme but looking at his brother and bakugo “dating” makes him deeply upset so he breaks in to decay all the art on the walls once a week
he crowds shouto in tears one day
“how are you okay with your boyfriend and your classmate being the subjects of such horrid art”
shouto, deadpan: “it’s just a prank bro”
izuku falls asleep in the common room and toshi carries him back to his room and has to call tenko to unlock the door for him. tenko was in his own dorm on the other side of school.
he sprinted
iida the good boy finishes his essays the week before and hands them in a day early
izuku, the hot mess, procrastinates by training until he cant feel his arms and doing any other subject work than the stuff due, stays up till 4am to finish his essay and doesnt go back to sleep cause its time for his morning run
they get the same grades
no one knows izuku is a hot mess
Dabi is like izuku but he doesnt study hes just depressed
Tenko finishes his the day before but he gets izuku to read it over
shouto does his essays in class
aizawa wants to be mad but he remembers him mic n tensei distracting the teachers for as long as they can to violently finish their essays
“katsuki why didn’t you finish your essay”
“i was making oreos from scratch sensei”
"fair, give me some and you can hand in it wednesday"
he bribes every single teacher into giving him extensions and no one can refuse him bc his extra spicy curry is to die for. he maybe sometimes he helps deku get an extension too but if he does that’s no one else’s business but his
izuku acts so soft w the others "oh isnt kacchans food so good? "
but he climbs into through katsukis window
"bitch whats the recipe"
izuku banging on katsuki s window at five in the morning: “kacchan give me ur fucking curry recipe you promised it to me three years ago”
bakugos hands shake as he tries to call aizawa
“i see u calling sensei kacchan, put the phone down and no one gets hurt”
he has one of katsukis limited editing all might figurines in his hand
“give me the recipe and all might lives katsuki. it doesn’t have to end this way”
shouji, stressed and sleep deprived walks into bakugou’s room just to see izuku menacingly trying to force his way in while bakugou is crying
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infinite-insignia · 4 years
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((I uh. made an edgy moodboard for myself. also a vent/rant under the cut.))
(( wasn’t exactly in a super angsty mood earlier but then I thought abt things and my brain went “man I really was a horrible person huh” so basically this is a representation of my edgy kin thoughts whenever they resurface. not even joking, some of the quotes are p accurate. especially the “killed my old self but the new me isn’t much better” one cause it reminds me of my death and honestly yeah. that was totally my doing. tryna be a better person in this life but I guess I can’t do that. I mean it didn’t work back then, why would it work now. tho if I give up on remembering my last life, I’d be giving up on what’s p much my purpose in this life. remember everything and use that knowledge to (try to) better myself before this human body gives out and this soul fades. cause I don’t think this soul’s gettin reincarnated again. not like I have another shot at remembering everything. but everyone tells me to stop focusing on the past. that it doesn’t define me now. but tbh? it kinda does at this point. the human life I’ve lived? yeah that was normal before I remembered what I was last time. and now it’s all I think abt--and to be told to stop thinking abt it? to be called delusional over it? to have people try and prove me wrong by telling me how I lived my life--or, worse, by saying it never even happened? it hurts me emotionally. like,,,deeply hurts me. I wanna talk to people abt things so I know someone’s listening. that someone cares enough to at least attempt to understand. even fake understanding would be enough cause I’d believe it was real. I’d have someone to talk to outside of tumblr, at least. sure, my psychologist knows a bit abt this stuff, but I only see her once every other week--and not this week. so I can’t talk to her. can’t talk to my mom cause she doesn’t understand and I know for a fact we’d end up arguing. she’s said it before--she wants her kid back. this messed-up delusional freak who brings past lives into their current one apparently isn’t her kid--but that’s who I am. that’s what I do. even among people like me, I feel alone. I can’t talk to anyone and it’s driving me nuts--but at the same time I’m terrified to talk to people because of the reactions they could have. I can talk abt it on here but to you guys it probably just seems like lame, delusional ranting. so I might as well shut up before I start to look like even more of a whiny bitch, huh. I say that despite knowing it’s hard to shut up once I start talking. ugh. man I went from 0 to 100 real quick in terms of bad moods. and it’s not even a bad mood? like I’m upset, yeah. but it doesn’t exactly feel like stress, it feels more like,,,emptiness. like I’ve dealt with this shit enough that I’ve figured there’s no point in stressing over what’s gonna happen every few days or so. my brain wants to mistake this emptiness for calmness--but I’m not calm. I’m not happy, I’m not content, I don’t even know what I’m feeling. I’m a freakshow brought into another life for god knows what reason. Phantom Ruby shouldn’t have had the power to reincarnate me but it somehow did. Ruby itself is here too somehow--it’s just super weak/faint. like,,,I can tell it’s there, but it can’t do much. I can’t even see it anymore or hear it out loud--it’s just like an inaudible voice, kinda like a thought that’s not actually coming from me. if that makes sense. probably doesn’t cause I’m just delusional apparently. oh well. can’t let my mom know I’m going through this cause we’d just argue. cant tell my sis cause she doesn’t wanna hear abt my kin bs. says its annoying cause I talk abt it too much. tho she also says it’s not an issue as long as I believe it and I’m not hurting anyone--and I’m not hurting people. not intentionally. I just wanna talk. have some sort of an outlet. but when most of my past life is full of war and murder and blood and stress and evil and destruction and everything else that is horrible, people are gonna judge me if I talk abt it. think I’m still some murderer today--which I’m not. definitely not. I regret the things I did. yet I’ve had someone tell me that ‘villains don’t feel regret’ and you wanna know what I did in response? pushed said person in a fit of anger. not a super strong push or anything, just enough to throw them off balance for a second. but like,,,you can’t tell me what I did or didn’t feel. sure I may not have regretted a whole bunch during the war, but afterwards? I was a walking ball of stress and regret trying to make a better name for myself but failing. waiting til the end of the planet, when I was the last living mobian, to do something abt it. and that something wasn’t pretty--it’s what caused me to move onto this current life. I get a lot of thoughts from various points in my last life, and those all cause a whole lot of emotions. yet, at the same time, I currently just feel like a void. an empty shell who feels the emotions but not the effects of them. the emotions exist but have no impact currently. tho that doesn’t make sense to you does it? wow. to think I was all happy yesterday over that follower milestone. ofc I have to go and ruin my own mood again since that’s all I’m good for apparently. might just go to bed early at this point. take the rest of the night off. nothing else to do. it’s either sleep or leave myself with my thoughts--the latter of which would only lead to more stress and/or empty feelings. anyway. I don’t want you guys worrying abt me. you can feel bad for me, try to make me feel better, but don’t worry. worrying abt me would be a waste of time. I’ll live. just going through another rough moment all of a sudden. but as long as I have a purpose in this current life, I plan to see it all the way through. meaning I won’t physically hurt myself or do anything stupid over this, so don’t worry. my physical health is just fine. mentally, not so sure. probably shouldn’t be saying not to worry cause now you’re gonna worry. whatever, I’ve been typing way too much. said more than I probably should have. probably look like an overreacting emo teen. but I’m just gonna go to bed and try not to let these thoughts get to me. tho my brain is most active right before falling asleep most nights so I doubt that’d work. gonna have to go to school tomorrow. no use in arguing, it makes everyone feel worse. it’s just gonna be a slow, crappy day. at least wednesday is a half day and then we get the rest of the week off for thanksgiving. not that we’re gonna be celebrating this year, we cancelled out plans cause my grandma’s sick and we usually go over to her place where she cooks thanksgiving dinner. but certain smells make her nauseous and the whole thing would be too much of a hassle, so we cancelled that this year. I’m kinda worried abt her. haven’t seen her in a little bit and she has another surgery in december. no idea what kind of surgery but she’s in her 70s and has been sick before so. idk. I do know I’m concerned for her and also myself. my own mental state is a wreck and idk what to do abt it. but for now I’m gonna go to bed. sorry for taking up so much of your time, assuming anyone actually read this whole thing.))
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bourbonboredom · 5 years
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A Reason To Believe Chapter 6
Being an undercover officer is a perilous job and Flip Zimmerman knows this far too well. He keeps his romantic life limited to one-night stands, never letting anyone get too close. That all starts to change when he meets a vivacious Jewish woman named Elle just as he’s about to take on a seriously dangerous  undercover job; infiltrating the KKK. Elle and his undercover work make him question things he’d never thought to before and challenge him to see the world, and himself, in a whole new light.
A Flip x OC Fic
Word Count: 4,339
Warnings:  brief N$FW moment, brief mention of violence
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When I'm with you
It doesn't matter where we are
Or what we're doing
I'm with you, that's all that matters
(x)
Flip was surprised when he ran his tongue over his lip and it brushed his mustache. He was trying to get a stray crumb but instead was met with the taste of pussy. Elle's pussy. Guess he missed a spot when washing his face that morning. He fought back a grunt as the tartness melted on his tongue, a reminder of his night. And the night before that. And the night before that.
After he'd spent that first night over in Elle's apartment, he was there almost every night for the next few weeks. The only time he elected to stay at his own place was when his undercover case had him up at weird hours. He'd go back to his lonely apartment, sad to sleep in an empty bed. He used to purposefully wake up before his date, prying himself from their bed and leaving before they even noticed.
He was a big guy and would prefer to have the bed to himself. But the way Elle's body curled up next to his just felt right. He'd wake up to the smell of her hair and the feeling of silky skin under his hand. If anything, it made it harder to leave in the morning. But he could control himself, he assured himself. They both had jobs to do, no sleeping in allowed.
He'd be fine at work most of the day, paperwork kept his mind busy. But little things brought his thoughts back to Elle. He'd catch a whiff of her perfume on his collar, or a stray piece of hair on his shirt, or her cum in his mustache.
He'd fought he urge to call her the first week and a half or so. He'd see her later in the day, there was no point of stopping what he was doing to call over to the hospital. It wasn't until his job kept him from seeing her for three days did he finally swallow his pride and call.
Jimmy had caught him at his desk. Flip thought everyone had gone to lunch, and used it as an excuse to 'call the hospital' to 'get more info on Kukowski's medical status'.
"You're smilin' an awful lot to be asking about a perp's condition," His partners eyebrows were raised as he clutched his coffee mug.
"It's confidential, if you'll excuse me for a minute," He put his hand over the phone so Elle couldn't hear, though the giggling in the background made him think she still could.
"You're talking to that cute nurse aren't you?" Jimmy's smile took up his whole face.
Flip furrowed his brow.
"Thank you for the update ma'am, have a nice day," He put on his authoritative voice, making Elle laugh harder on the other end.
"Alright officer, you too. I'll see you at the diner tonight," She responded before the line disconnected.
He hung up the phone and stood up to get more coffee from the break room.
"Get all the information you needed detective Zimmerman?" His partner called behind him, voice full of smug glee.
He was just met with a middle finger as Flip left the room.
——
"I wanna take you out," He mumbled against her breast.
Post-coitus, Flip had taken to resting his head on her chest. It gave her easy access to run her fingers through his hair, and let him use her breasts as pillows as he came down from his high.
"Like a date? We were just at the diner yesterday," She reminded him.
"No, like a real date. We can go to this nice Italian place on my side of town. They have candles on the tables and they dim the lights and stuff,"
"I mean if you want to. I don't think I've been on a real date in like a year," She mused, fingers scraping along his scalp in a soothing motion. He was practically purring under her touch.
“I’d say it’s just about time then,”
“When was the last time you went on a date? A real one, not picking up a girl at a bar,” She turned her head so she could look at him.
Her curls, which had been fanned across the pillow moments before, were gathered in to a braid and thrown over her shoulder. He was playing with the end of it, dragging the hair across her skin and watching her try not to act ticklish.
“I don’t know, maybe a couple of years ago?”
“You don’t have to answer if you don’t like the question, but why aren’t you married?”
His head rose from her chest as he propped himself up with his elbows. He looked at her, analyzing her face as he thought about how to answer.
“I am married. You’re my mistress, didn’t you know?”
“Phillip,” She rolled her eyes. “I’m serious. You’re a great guy, respectful, good in bed, you got a good job, I can’t figure out how you haven’t been snatched up,”
“I’m married to my job is the short answer. Being on the force is hard. I work long hours, I can’t always be there, and I have to keep a lot of secrets,” He bit at his lip as he thought of what he wanted to say next.
There were some things he wasn’t quite ready to share with her, mainly that he was an undercover officer and not just a regular guy on the force. If they were truly keeping things casual, he wanted to keep her away from the more dangerous aspects of his job. If they kept this going and got more serious, he pledged to himself to have an honest conversation about his position, and what it could mean for their relationship.
“I had a long time girlfriend when I joined the force. Linda. We started dating right before I was accepted at the academy. She helped me through it, staying up studying with me, going to my graduation. My mom kept asking me when I was going to propose. I thought I wanted to, maybe in the next year or so. But police work kept getting harder. I’d be working long nights, had to cancel a few dates. Linda was okay with it at first, but it kept happening. I’d try to make it up to her, but I was new to the team and a lot of the grunt work would fall on me. Eventually she broke up with me, said she couldn’t take it anymore. She never knew where I was or if I was safe or whether she was going to see me that night. I understood, tried to tell her it would get better, but I knew I couldn't make her happy anymore,”
“So I kept on with work, tried dating a few other girls after that but it was the same problem. They wanted me home for dinner every night and being a detective just doesn’t allow for that. Flings have just been easier,”
He didn’t realize he’d looked away from her while speaking, vulnerability bubbling up in his chest as he spoke. He looked back at her to see she’d been watching him the whole time. Her brow was slightly furrowed and her eyes tinged with sadness.
“I’m sorry that happened,” She started. “You deserve someone who understands,”
“You have pretty well,” He offered.
“My job is just similar is all. Long shifts, late nights. It’s a pain in the ass to work around, you just gotta find the right person. I thought I had, back in Indiana. I was seeing this guy, Abe. He worked at the university nearby and never complained about my job. He was the first guy who didn’t immediately try to get me to quit and become a housewife. He seemed to get that my job was important to me, that I really love what I do,”
“But?” Flip asked. Elle sighed and shrugged her shoulders.
“But once I got the opportunity to come work here in Colorado things started to change. Abe even talked about moving with me at one point, him getting a job at a state college down here. But the closer the moving date got, the more keen to stay in Indiana he was. It was just talk to him, a fantasy. He never really intended on moving, and never thought i’d actually want to go. When he realized what I really wanted, he begged me to stay with him. He gave me his grandmother’s wedding ring and asked me to marry him,”
“He didn’t really know you all that well then, huh?”
“No, I guess not,” Elle let out a dry laugh. “If I wanted to marry him, I would have by then. I think he thought it was romantic, a sweeping declaration of love. It really just cemented my decision to leave. I gave him the ring back and told him I was sorry. I took a Greyhound to here a week later,”
“I guess we’re both married to out jobs then,” Flip set his head back down on her chest.
“I do have to wear white everyday,” She noted, stifling a laugh. He chuckled at her joke along with her.
“We don’t have to worry about labels or anything right now. We’re just two busy adults having a good time with one another. No weddings or family heirlooms involved,” He assured her, his hand reaching up to play with the pendant sitting near the hollow of her throat.
“You’re the only guy I’m seeing right now,” He could feel the vibrations from her voice as she spoke. “I’m okay with this being more casual, but I thought you should know,”
“You’re the only girl I’m seeing right now,” He left out the part where even if there were others, he’d drop them in an instant to be with her. He knew he should take it slow, for both their sake, but he couldn't help but feel this was a little more emotionally invested than just having a good time together.
“Wow, we’re really bad at this,” She teased.  “So, as two casual-but-currently-monogamous professionals, when is the best time for us to go on a date?,”
“Maybe Saturday night after you get off work? I can pick you up,” He knew he'd be meeting ‘the organization’ at Felix's house earlier that day. It would be his first meeting with the whole bunch, but he didn't expect it to last into the night.
“Only if we go dutch with the check,” She pointed at him.
"Of course," his palm rubbed against her bare breast catching her nipple. “Now do you think we can fit one more round in before midnight?”
She gasped under his touch, giving him a sly smirk before pulling him into round three for the night.
-------
If Flip knew he was going to spend his Saturday being forced to take a lie detector test at gunpoint, listen to his partner throw a rock through the window of a klansman's house, and then have to chase after said klansman to make sure his partner wasn't shot, he would have chosen a different night for his date with Elle.
But here he was, heart rate still trying to even itself as he drove home hours later. He would've been fine if Ron didn't throw a rock through the window of Felix's house. He would’ve talked his way out somehow. What was he even thinking? A black man instigating an attack while the house was crawling with armed white supremacists? He'd spoken to him about it at the station after he left Felix's, it didn't go great.
Ron was more focused on trying to make Flip impassioned about the cause. Trying to get him to feel the same way as he did, even though that wasn't him. He didn't let personal stuff get in the way of his work, he couldn't if he wanted to do a good job.
“Doesn’t that hatred you’ve been hearing the Klan say doesn’t that piss you off?” Ron had asked him in the dimly lit records room before they headed out for the weekend.
“Of course it does,” He’d responded. It was an easy question to answer, but it felt much more complicated under the surface.
“Then why you acting like you ain’t got skin in the game, brother?”
The Rookie’s words were frustrating. He didn’t understand what it was like for Flip growing up. His family pushing away their religion and their culture to fit in, until they were left with nothing but a name and some disregarded family heirlooms hidden away in the closet. Him never feeling like he really fit in with his Christian classmates, but also unable to relate to any Jewish people he met. He was always stuck in some middle ground, somewhere between what his parents wanted him to be and what they tried to keep from him.
Of course he had skin in the game, when the Klan talked about hating Jews, they were talking about his family. They were talking about Eliana. They were talking about him. Ron wasn’t considering how maybe it was so easy for him to slip into the roll of ‘White Anglo-Saxon Protestant, cherry pie, hot dog, white boy’ because it was all he ever knew. It’s not like he’s parading around with these racists and heading on home to Shabbat after, he knew nothing about the culture the Klan hated him for being apart of.
“Rookie, that’s my fucking business,” He gritted out, making direct eye contact with Ron. He didn’t want to talk about this anymore, especially not with his partner.
“It’s our business,” Ron responded.
Fuck that. He left him standing there in the back of the room as he lit a cigarette. It’d help calm him down.
Flip took a deep breath in an attempt to clear out all feelings from his work. He decided to focus on the night ahead. A date with Elle. A real date with Elle. He'd picked out his clothes earlier that day, his nerves getting the better of him. The black slacks and white polyester shirt were lying on his bed with a pair of dress shoes on the floor.
He slipped out of his work clothes and took a quick shower before re-dressing, his large hands buttoning the shirt with a practiced ease. He took a look in the mirror, smoothing down his damp hair into his usual center part before adjusting his cuffs.
All he could think when he looked at his reflection was of Felix pointing the gun to his head. It wasn't the first time it had happened. He'll, he'd been to war before he was on the force. And he'd been an undercover officer for the last three years, he'd had his fair share of close calls. But this was different. That gun wasn't to his head because of something completely out of his control; his heritage. Something he didn't even see as a big part of him.
What would have happened if they somehow found out who he really was? Would he have been shot over something so trivial? Was it trivial if someone wanted to kill him over it? He wasn't even a practicing Jew. But would that have mattered?
He laced up the dress shoes and shrugged on his sherpa jacket before leaving his quiet apartment to pick up his date. He tried hard to push his work out of his mind, turning up the radio to let a Chicago song take up the overworked parts of his brain.
Time passes much too quickly 
When we're together laughing
I wish I could sing it to you, oh no
I wish I could sing it to you
He pulled up to Elle's right as she was walking out the front door. She beamed as she saw his car pull up. He put it in park and was about to climb out to open the door for her when she yelled over for him to stay inside.
Perplexed, he sat in the drivers seat as she got in the car and settled in the passengers side.
"You don't need to get out of the car just to get back in, I can open a dumb door by myself," She explained, giving him a peck on the cheek after.
"If you insist," He caught her face before she turned away, pulling her into a longer kiss on the lips.
She hummed with content as his lips pressed against hers, an emotion he felt himself. The world disappeared for a second, his problems evaporating when he could smell her perfume permeating the air around them.
They broke apart and it took him a moment to drift back to reality. With one hand on the wheel and one hand resting with hers in the median, he drove off toward their destination.
Giuseppe's Italian Restaurant was a tiny whole-in-the-wall joint, with decor that hadn't been updated since they opened in 1940. But they had some of the best reviews in the city.
Flip let Elle get out of the car on her own, taking a good look at her outfit for the night. Her hair was down, her dark curls contrasting against her fair skin. Her necklace rested against her clavicle as always. She was wearing a floral dress, made of a flowing material. The neckline was tight and plunged, showing a fair amount of skin, but the skirt came to mid-calf and was gathered. It wasn't something he'd ever picture her wearing but she looked fantastic.
"A dress?" He placed his hand on her lower back as they walked toward the entrance. "Weren't you just protesting by wearing pants to work?"
"I'm not at work, am I? I can clean up nice from time to time," She wore a sly smile as they were escorted to their table.
Wine was ordered with dinner, the plates of food so big that they had to move the candle to the side of the small table. Everything was going great, the two of them talking in hushed tones and laughing in not-so hushed ones. They picked off each other's plates, earning the occasional side-eye from some of the more refined diners. Elle would raise an eyebrow at them and they'd turn their attention back to their own table.
He was about to take another bite of pasta when he saw a man walk by the window who looked awfully familiar. Blonde hair, slight build, gaunt face, Felix-like. Flips blood suddenly ran cold. His eyes trained on the front window as the man walked by, trying to get a better look at him.
The man walked by, not bothering to look inside the restaurant. After a few seconds of studying his face, Flip determined it wasn't Felix. He breathed a sigh of relief, trying to yet again push the image of a gun to his head out of his mind.
"Flip?" He heard his voice called.
He turned his head back to the table to see Elle staring at him, brow furrowed. She'd rested her hand on top of his, something he hadn't even felt her do.
"You drifted for a moment there, are you feeling okay?" She asked.
“Yeah, just thought I saw someone from work, sorry about that,"
"Do you want to leave? We can eat the rest of this later if you'd like,"
"No, no, let's finish our date. I'm fine, really," He squeezed her hand, hoping to reassure her.
She gave him a look before continuing to eat. They filled the next couple of minutes with small talk, his mind still half at work as he thought about what happened at Felix's.
"Tell me more about your family," He found himself saying.
"Uh, what do you want to know?" She asked, looking at him with uncertainty.
"Why did they come to America? You said it was before the way right? Why America?"
"It's the land of opportunity. Coming from 1930s Germany, where they weren't even considered to be citizens, America was a paradise,"
"How were they not citizens?"
"Jews weren't citizens under the Nuremberg laws. Even if they'd lived in the country for generations, like my family. Before the war even started, dozens of restrictions were put on Jews to prevent them from contributing. We had to identify our businesses, we had to be in a registry, we couldn't marry outside our race-"
Flip's brain clicked. Jews were considered a race, not always just a religion. He knew this, but something in the way Elle spoke of it brought back memories of events he hadn’t really considered before. The way "Jew" was said by kids in grade school on the playground. The way it was said in a hushed tone by his mother's Bridge Club when she's host them at their house after carefully hiding all family relics. The way it was spat like venom by members of the Klan, said like it was the lowest thing a person could be.
"What were the Nuremberg laws?" He asked.
"What are they teaching out here?" She half-muttered, looking concerned. "They were laws to systematically enforce discrimination against Jews. The holocaust didn't happen overnight, the government worked for years to get Germany to see us as inferior. These laws prevented us from working and socializing outside our communities. Many fled, like my mother and father. They left in 1937, and had to give up most of their wealth in order to be allowed to emigrate. The rest of the family stayed behind, and were eventually taken to the camps,"
She grimaced as she spoke, rubbing her pendant between her fingers.
"My mother's brother was the only survivor we know of our family. He came to the US to live with us after he was liberated. I'd never met him before the war but mama says he wasn't the same when he came to live with us. He rarely talked about his time in the camps, and held a lot of survivors guilt. He watched everyone around him die, I can't imagine what he had to do to survive,"
She had looked down while talking, and looked back up at Flip when she finished, seeming startled.
"Sorry, this is really heavy conversation for a date,"
"No, I was the one who asked. I guess there are a lot of things they don't teach about the holocaust in school,"
"It's a shonda, how can people be expected to learn from it if they don't even know about it?" She slapped her hand on the table, drawing another look from a nearby table.
"They teach enough for it to never happen again," He said
"I hope you're right," She sounded unconvinced. "But either way, my family came here with next to nothing. At least they got here, a lot of people who tried to come to America as refugees were turned away at the border. They had to go back to Europe, where many died during the war. My parents were fortunate to have friends here to help get them on their feet,"
"I don't really know where my family came from. My grandparents on my fathers side came from Russia, but my mother never talked about her family. She said they'd passed away when I was a baby. We didn't really talk much in my family if you can't tell," He tried to make light of the situation.
"Maybe you could find some records at your parent's house. Or you could talk to your grandparents, if they're still alive,"
"They're not, but my parents inherited a bunch of their stuff, so I could ask," He said, thinking to himself about how that might go. They should be more open to talking about family stuff. He was an adult for fucks sake.
He considered how different his life was from Elle's. An assimilated military family in middle America versus an immigrant family from the biggest melting pot city in the world. Vastly different lives that somehow became connected. He caresses her hand with his thumb as he took it all in. The two of them sitting in this tiny restaurant in the candle light, talking about their lives openly.
"I like you, Eliana, a lot," He confessed, unable to find the words to fully express his feelings.
"I like you too, Phillip,” She stopped the movement of his thumb so she could hold his hand. "And this date is nice, but I can think of some place I'd rather be,"
"Oh?"
She leaned across the table, lowering her voice for his ears only.
"In my bed, with you on top of me, fucking me into the mattress until dawn,"
He was grateful his hair covered his ears because they for sure just turned red. He felt his cock stir in his pants, his hips shifting to try to adjust.
"Were in public, you know that right?" He smirked, lacing his fingers with hers.
"I can't help it if I want you in me 24/7," She pouted, letting her big brown eyes work him over.
"Is that so?" He leaned forward, letting his lips press against her ear as he spoke.
"If you want my fat cock in you, you're gonna have to listen closely Trouble. We're going to get out of here, get in my car and drive home. You're gonna be a good girl, I can't be getting pulled over by a coworker because you can't keep your hands to yourself,"
Her breath hitched as he continued.
"When we get back to your place, I suggest you take that dress off before I tear it off you. And then you'll get what you want, do you understand me?"
"Ten-four, detective," She whispered.
A few seconds later he felt her bare foot ghost over his lap. She must have taken off her heel while he was talking, and was now rubbing him through the fabric. The little minx. He raised an eyebrow at her, holding her foot steady with his hand. He was suddenly thankful the tablecloths were long.
"You said I couldn't touch you in the car, were not quite there yet, are we?" Her eyes glinted and her mouth twisted into a devilish smile.
"Check please!" He choked out.
_______
NOTES
There aren’t a ton of notes for this chapter, its more of just dissecting Flip’s feelings and struggle with understanding his identity. Where Elle grew up very sure in her cultural/religious identity, Flip didn’t really “grow up Jewish” as he mentioned in the movie. I think he’d definitely struggle with his identity, especially when confronted with so much hate regarding it. 
Here’s a basic idea of what Elle’s dress might look like (center dress)
I mentioned the Nuremberg Laws in chapter 4, but if you want to hear about the atrocities of the holocaust listen to the Mengele episodes from Last Podcast On The Left. It’s a three-part series and a little hard to stomach at times. I have a pretty strong stomach when it comes to true crime but this one got me a few times where I had to take a break (definite TW).
A shonda is yiddish for a disgrace/scandal. Its great vocab for overdramatic people such as I.
Thanks for reading!
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kathillards · 5 years
Text
rangerstop day two
HOLY FUCKING SHIT THE MEGAFORCE RANGERS SHOUTED US OUT AT THEIR PANEL AZIM TOLD EVERYONE ABOUT A GROUP OF FRIENDS FROM ALL OVER THE COUNTRY WHO MET BECAUSE OF POWER RANGERS AND POINTED AT US AND THE MEGAFORCE RANGERS ALL CHEERED AND TOLD US TO STAND UP OH MY GOD
uhhh sorry how do i move on from that how do i even think about anything else. the panel room was CROWDED people were FILMING kat and tabby had gone up to ask questions (which were HUGE hits) and come back and sat down AND THEN AZIM SAID THAT in the middle of a question about. i dont even fucking remember. something about what great community values power rangers has or something? and i guess we were related to power rangers being a community or whatever but bitch. BITCH. he said it and like pointed at us and they all started clapping (this sounds fake as hell i know BUT THERES VIDEO PROOF SOMEWHERE???) and everyone turned to look at us and we were like hi and then like two minutes later azim went “oh wait i have to make a correction, its not a group of girls its three girls and one guy because i think abigail isnt here? right?” and we were like ya so uh moral of the story... azim rizk i would murder ten hundred men for you
ok other things happened too, this will probably not be in chronological order bc i cant think right now 
- mike ginn stopped when he saw me and looked for tabby who was hiding behind me when she saw him and he looked around for tabby and did his pointing thing again and it was so cuuute
- kat was talking to christina about how we avoided the cast all day yesterday and she was like “yes but i saw you anyway ;) and i was wondering when you’d come over to say hi!” shes so CUTE and then they talked about her rescue puppy and she was so happy to talk about her puppy
- ciara and christina made ben sign the art presents he gave them, ciara did it first and christina was like OMG WHY DIDNT YOU AUTOGRAPH MINE and made him sign hers too
- christina and i did a WHOLE photoshoot we did a normal pic then a silly pic but then she didnt like so we did a kissy face pic and she was like “oh i think i did a duck face” and im like thats ok so did i AND OUR PICS ARE SO CUTE AND SHE HUGGED ME SO TIGHT I. WOULD. DIE. FOR. YOU. CHRISTINA. MASTERSON.
- selwyn called tabby his girlfriend when i showed up without her he was like “wheres my girlfriend” bc he remembered us from last night and then she came over and he was like THERE YOU ARE and gave her a free selfie (and signed her space dvd with “tj is the real leader of in space” but refused to X out andros’ face bc that was mean) and he covered up najee’s face on her kevin t-shirt and then was upset bc it looked like he was touching her chest and tracy lynn laughed at him over it AND THEN HE TOLD US TO COME TO THE TGIF IN THE HOTEL AFTERWARDS BC THE RANGERS WERE GONNA GO THERE AND GET DRUNK AND HE INVITED US TO HAVE DRINKS W/ HIM but we stood him up because... we are tired... he was like “yeah we have this stupid vip dinner but like we’re gonna try to leave early and just go get fucking smashed” and we were like ur so valid selwyn. i love you.
- kat showed azim my tweets defending megaforce and he had to put the phone down to run his hands through his hair and be like “wow that was such a specific takedown” and kat was like “yeah she just says this shit all the time bc shes seen megaforce five hundred times” and he was like “she was so detailed though she didnt just say ‘you suck’ she put THOUGHT into her takedowns” 
- (later when he signed my super megaforce green print he called me “my sista in social media smackdown!!!” complete with that many exclamation points)
- brennan said “i like your hat” to ben five times and he also signed tabby’s as well with his three catchphrases (she asked for him to write “awesome!” and he was like “i had more lines than that....”) he also told us he and the dino charge team were invited back for a dc/nsteel teamup but they kept cancelling them bc of budget reasons till it was just him and yoshi and he was finally like “i told them to just bring yoshi back because like thats his brother” and i was like “but then they didnt even INTERACT” and he was like “i KNOW”
- tabby’s tracy story: she asked tracy if it was uncomfortable fighting in crop tops and short skirts and tracy said “it wasnt uncomfortable but it was hard to not show everything” and she was like “idk why a power ranger would dress like that” and tabby told her ashley should have her own fashion line of athletic wear for fighter girls and tracy was like YES and tabby said she should have been leader of turbo bc she was into cars and tracy said that when they told her that ashley was gonna have a car plot she was like “ew no i dont want to touch greasy car oils” but that she was happy that ashley got to challenge herself
- kat was standing around azim the entire morning and he was introducing her to everyone who came up to him like she was his handler and at one point accidentally implied that she was his girlfriend and kat was like no im not and he was like “oh whoops it did kinda sound like that...” and his actual handler was like “why did u correct him” and kat was like “NO I LOVE HIS GIRLFRIEND” 
- when i was taking my pics w/ the megaforce cast and andrew was the sweetest angel and he kept making poses over my shoulder while i giggled and then he asked me for a hug and KISSED MY CHEEK and hugged me so tight and was like “love you guys” I WOULD DIE FOR YOU ANDREW GRAY
- john mark is literally the funniest person alive and he was constantly going around the megaforce booth when we were there like (to ben when he was giving art to ciara and christina) “WHERES MINE” and to me when i was having them sign my megaforce prints “WHERES MINE” hes so funny and i love himmm
- ciara was signing my prints but she got distracted when we asked about her dogs and she stopped and opened her phone and started showing us pics and videos and she was soo happy to talk about her dogs too and then we took our pic and checked it to make sure it looked good and tabby was like “you look gorgeous” and she was like “we BOTH look gorgeous” i cannot believe. AND THEN she threw in a group photo for FREE and we all got in there
- kat was telling us and azim about some douchebag vendor who was like hitting on her and inviting her to an afterparty and was like “are you over 21″ when she was just trying to look at his spd toys and azim was literally “which guy. where. where is he.” HE WAS GONNA KILL THAT GUY FOR KAT HE LOVES HER
- we somehow got on the subject of azim SHAVING HIS BEAUTIFUL BEARD and he was like “oh well we went to the make a wish foundation to meet kids and the beard scares them so i had to shave” and i was like “thats racist” and he was like nooo but u could tell his mind was blown and i was like “cameron didnt shave” and he was like “well cameron is white” and i was like SO YOU ADMIT ITS RACIST and he laughed also im correct
- related but michael copon came over to jessica rey’s table while we were there and she was like “hi michael these are my FRIENDS” and they were talking about how they’re cousins and they’re both half filipino and tabby was like “why didnt they give you any scenes together in the teamup!” and jessica was like “because i was with erin!” and michael was like “because they couldnt have two filipinos together in one scene” power rangers got WOKE man
- kat to andrew: i have a huge troy plushie!
andrew: oh my dogs would rip that up immediately
kat:
andrew: do your dogs not rip things up
kat: i dont... i wouldnt let them...touch my troy plushies...
(we love you andrew. he doesnt even know hes at a con. hes just here to chill.)
- someone at the panel asked a stupid question about “if you could cameo in any other season which season would you pick” like they dont get asked this all the fucking time and the rangers were like hmm like beast morphers or dino charge and then andrew, my husband my light my life, was like “fuck power rangers, i wanna go to the dc universe” (he didnt cuss obviously) but like... king. legend supporting legends. AND THEN CHRISTINA WAS LIKE “oh mood i wanna be in the pokemon universe” and john mark was like “as what” and she was like “i dont know i didnt watch it” QUEEN OF POKEMON she kins jigglypuff
- tabby was at ann marie crouch’s booth and telling her how she loved that princess shayla was the wild force team’s mom and she was like aww yeah i felt such a maternal instinct even though that was before i had my actual child!! shes so cute!! shes so pretty!!
- jessica rey is literally SO WONDERFUL AND FUN TO TALK TO we went to hang out bc tabby wanted her wild force dvd signed and she was just telling us her stories of hanging out w/ the other boys and how she went to drink w/ azim just to keep him company (bc peter and yoshi were there and they were like “we dont drink” nerds) so cuuute and then she had that pic of her and peter and yoshi and they’re making stupid faces and she’s smiling like an angel and she’s like THEY DIDNT TELL ME IT WASNT A SERIOUS PHOTO and i asked her jokingly how much for it and she was like take it its $30 and i was like pls charge me more have my money take my soul
- tabby and kat were at the megaforce booths and jessica rey came over and was like “excuse me what are you guys doing with MY GIRLS” and john mark was like “uh they’re OUR GIRLS” and then cameron pulled jessica over and was like “actually this is MY babe” and then she tried to leave bc she was in the way of ppl in line and azim stopped her and was like “no no stay you’re part of our FAMILY”and uh basically the power rangers family is the cutest family in the whole world thank you good night
- taylor swift wrote gorgeous about andrew gray
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chasholidays · 6 years
Note
Hi! I cant believe it's holiday fic season already what happened. My prompt is for the 100, whatever pairing you'd like. The pairing has been neighbors forever, and regularly go visit via the others bedroom window. They dont keep it a secret on purpose, but dont realize its weird until one of them goes into the others room without realizing someone is already in there. :)
i. ten
Bellamy hates his mom’s new boyfriend.
She’s had boyfriends before, but he’s never actually hated any of them, not while she was dating them. But Bart wants to be a father to Bellamy in just the bad ways, wants to be the one who punishes him for screwing up and ignores all the good marks on his report card to focus on the two areas where he needs improvement.
That’s his excuse for sending Bellamy to bed without dinner, telling Mom that it’s the only way he’ll learn.
“Boys need discipline,” he says. “If you don’t teach him what’s right now, he’ll never learn. You have to take a firm hand.”
Mom doesn’t argue, and he hates them, both of them, with a passion. It was a good report card. One of his needs improvement scores was on penmanship. He doesn’t have to have good handwriting. Plenty of people don’t. Doctors don’t. He’s seen Clarke’s mom write notes; he knows that’s not just a joke in TV shows.
Mom comes to check on him an hour later, when he’s reading.
“I know you think it’s unfair, but Bart is just trying to help.”
“Trying to help who?”
“I know it’s hard for you, not having a father figure in your life.”
“I’d rather not have anyone than have him.”
“You don’t mean that.”
“I do so.”
She sighs again. “You’ll feel better in the morning.”
“Not if I don’t have anything to eat,” he mutters.
His mother doesn’t have a response to that, just leans over, kisses his hair, and turns off the light on her way out.
He makes himself read two more chapters of his book, and then he carefully opens up the window and climbs out onto the roof.
It’s not a bad path from Bellamy’s window to the ground, and it goes over the garage, so even if he’s loud (which he isn’t, he and Clarke checked), Mom doesn’t usually hear him. Once he’s gotten to the end of the garage, all he has to do is climb down onto the fence, and then from the fence to the ground. He could fall, but he never has before. He’s good at this.
Clarke’s house is behind his, and there’s a fence between their yards, but that’s never been a problem. There’s a gap in the fence behind the shed that his mom doesn’t know about, and he can still fit through it.
Getting to Clarke’s window is a little harder. He has to climb up a tree, and the branches are just a little too high. But he’s a good climber, and he wants to see Clarke. If he knocked on the door this late, her parents would worry, and they’d tell his mom, and he’d get in even more trouble.
So he has to improvise.
Her light is out, but he does their special knock, and after just a few minutes, she comes over and opens the window.
“Bellamy?” she whispers, looking worried.
“Hi.”
“What are you doing here?”
“I hate Bart.”
She moves out of the way so he can come in. “I know. What happened?”
“He said my report card wasn’t good enough and sent me to bed without dinner. And Mom let him.”
“You didn’t have dinner?” she asks, sounding horrified.
“No.”
“Are you hungry?”
“Just annoyed.”
“Are you sure?”
He smiles. “Do you actually have any food up here?”
“Not much,” she says. “But I have a candy bar.”
“You have a candy bar and you didn’t eat it yet?”
“I was saving it!” She goes over to her dresser and pulls out a Kit-Kat. It’s fun-size, not a real candy bar, but it’s still good.
“Thanks. Do you want half?”
“It’s okay. I had dinner.” She worries her lip. “Sorry about Bart. I hate him.”
“I hate him too. Thanks for the candy.”
“You’re welcome. Are you going to go home?” she asks. “You could stay.”
“Mom might feel guilty,” he says. “I should go home. If she notices I’m not there, it’ll be bad.”
“I guess. Sorry,” she says again.
“You didn’t do anything.”
“I’m sorry that it’s happening. I hope she breaks up with him soon.”
“She always breaks up with them.” He sighs. “Okay, I should go.”
“If you’re sure.”
“I’m sure. I think I’m grounded too, so–I’ll see you when I can.”
“Okay. If you come over tomorrow night, I’ll have some food for you. Just in case.”
He has to smile; Bart might suck, but at least his best friend is great. “Thanks, Clarke. Goodnight.”
“Night, Bellamy.”
ii. fifteen
Nine times out of ten, Bellamy knows better than to fall asleep at Clarke’s, which means that, when he does do it, circumstances must be dire.
Dr. Griffin seems to agree, because she shakes him awake with a weary, “Time to get up, Bellamy.”
Clarke is still asleep, curled into herself on the other side of the bed, and since Dr. Griffin doesn’t try to wake her, he doesn’t either. He slides out of bed carefully, glad he didn’t even take off his jeans, and Dr. Griffin jerks her head to the door.
He follows her into the hall, she closes the door, and they stand for a second in awkward silence.
“Coffee?” she finally offers.
“Yeah, thanks.”
Bellamy has always assumed Dr. Griffin doesn’t understand his friendship with Clarke, in part because he doesn’t understand it himself. It was a mistake of geography, the two of them becoming friends, something that never would have happened if her house wasn’t behind his. They don’t go to the same school, they don’t run in the same social circles.
They’re still best friends.
“You snuck in?” Dr. Griffin asks.
He doesn’t see much point in denying it. “I was worried. I didn’t want her to be alone.”
She nods. “Ordinarily, I’d be telling you sleepovers have to go through me. But—I’m glad you were there for her.”
“Understood.” He takes a sip of his coffee. “How are you doing?”
Her mouth tugs up in a wry half smile. She looks exhausted and wrung out; he assumes she fell asleep crying, the same as Clarke did. “I’m doing the best I can. Thank you for asking.”
He already offered his condolences yesterday, and they felt as hollow then as they do now. He lost his father before he ever knew him, and the pain of that is different from Jake’s death now, today.
“Why don’t you go back up to Clarke’s room?” she asks, to his surprise. “I’ll give your mother a call, let her know you’re here. I’m sure she’ll understand.”
If he made the call, he’d get a talking to, death or no death, but Dr. Griffin should be able to handle it.
Still, her husband just died.
“You don’t have to. I can call her.”
“I think it will sound better coming from me. It’s fine, Bellamy,“ she adds, before he can protest any further. "Go look after Clarke.”
A lump rises in his throat; maybe she doesn’t mind his being friends with Clarke so much after all.
“I will. Let us know if you need anything.”
Clarke’s still asleep when he gets back, so he grabs Graceling off her bookshelf and settles in with his coffee.
She rolls over and curls up against him. “What happened?”
“Nothing. Just wanted some coffee.”
“Did my mom see you?”
“Yeah, it was fine.” He slides his hand into her hair, gentle. “How are you doing?”
“Shitty.”
“I figured. Go back to sleep.”
“Okay. Thanks for being here.”
“Obviously,” he says. “I’m not going anywhere.”
iii. twenty
Bellamy gets home for spring break a week before Clarke does, which always seems unfair. It wouldn’t be that hard for their schools to coordinate so they have the whole vacation together. It would just be polite.
Clarke’s getting back late on Friday, and while he’s sure he could just call her and have her let him in, it seems like a lot of work when he could just climb up to her window.
The light is on and the window is unlocked, so she must have had the same thought.
He taps the glass, just so she has warning, and when there’s no response, he opens it up and slides in.
“If you’re not the neighbor I’m calling the cops,” someone says, and he jerks up to see a gorgeous girl with long, dark hair staring at him.
He scrambles for an explanation for her presence. Clarke is single right now, so it can’t be a girlfriend, and she didn’t mention anyone coming back with her, but there were storms in the northeast, so maybe someone’s flight got canceled.
Either way, she’s already in the room and he was breaking in through the window, so he’s definitely in the wrong here.
“Bellamy, yeah,” he says.
“And this is just your thing.”
He frowns. “What is?”
“You climb into Clarke’s window?”
It feels like a trick question. “Just when it’s after like eight.”
The girl stares at him, then shakes her head. “Wow, you don’t think that’s weird. I thought it must just be Clarke. Nope, you guys are somehow just convinced this is a thing that happens.”
“Did you never watch Clarissa Explains It All?” he asks, but there is this prickling awareness up his neck.
It’s not as if he never thought it was weird. One time, when they were fourteen, he knocked on the window and she called back that she was changing, and he’d thought maybe that was the end, that she’d tell him to never come back. That they’d crossed that mysterious threshold of being too old.
But once she was done, she opened the window with a smile, and the moment passed.
“Dude,” says the girl.
“Sorry, but who are you again?”
“Raven. My flight got canceled.”
“Sorry. Nice to meet you, thanks for telling me my life is weird, I guess.”
“Come on, she said her hot neighbor came in through her window but that it wasn’t a euphemism. Of course I didn’t believe her.”
“Raven,” says Clarke, at the door. It’s just as well, because otherwise Bellamy would have asked if Clarke called him hot, or if Raven was editorializing. Which would not have helped any part of his life, honestly.
“I was just saying. You done with the bathroom?”
“Yeah.”
“Cool, then I’m going to shower. Have fun catching up.”
That’s definitely a euphemism, and Bellamy feels himself flush. “Nice to meet you too.”
Once they’re alone, Clarke bites her lip, smiling a little. “Hi.”
“Hi.”
“Sorry about her. I told her you’d probably show up and she made a huge deal about it.”
“I guess I could have just come in through the door like a normal person.”
“Fuck that.” She looks him up and down. “Do I get a hug?”
“Oh, yeah, obviously.”
He wraps her up in his arms, and she burrows in, tucking her nose against his neck. She’s freshly showered and smells clean and bright and perfect. They talk, of course, when they’re at school, but he still misses her so much he can’t breathe sometimes.
“This is kind of weird, right?” he murmurs. “She wasn’t wrong.”
"Weird how?”
“I don’t do this with any of my other friends.”
“You don’t live this close to them.”
“I wouldn’t, though. Just you.”
She pulls back, studying him, eyes sharp. He loves her in the easiest way possible, has loved her since before he even knew it. And he thinks he could go on loving her like that for the rest of his life, could love other people too, without feeling guilty about it. It doesn’t have to be anything, but it could be. If it wasn’t, he’d always wonder what it would have been like.
So maybe now is the time to find out.
“Just me?” she asks, and he tucks her hair back behind her ear.
“Sorry, do you have a lot of people climbing in your window?”
She laughs. “No, you’re right. Just you.”
Even though there are probably better things to say, he asks, “Did you tell Raven I’m your hot neighbor?”
“Obviously.”
“Cool,” he says, and kisses her.
It’s just like he hoped it would be.
iv. twenty-five
The window in Clarke’s dressing room is probably too small for him to actually climb through, and even if he could, it would really mess up his tux, but tradition is important, so he does the secret knock and waits for Clarke to call, “It’s bad luck for you to see me, dumbass!”
“There are curtains, I can’t see you.”
“So you’re just hanging outside like a creeper?”
“I wanted to say hi.”
“We’re getting married in an hour. I figured we’d probably get to talk then.”
“This is the last time you’re going to have a window that isn’t mine too, okay?”
They’ve been living together since they finished college, so it’s not as if cohabitation is going to be some new thing for them, but of course, Clarke gets it. Clarke always gets it.
“Okay, yeah. Do you want to come in?”
“Not really, just–for old time’s sake.”
“Don’t worry, you’ll lock yourself out of the apartment and have to knock to get in sooner or later. We’re not losing this.”
“Sorry for trying to do something romantic on our wedding day.”
“You should be.” The curtain moves back, and Clarke opens the door. She’s got a blanket around her shoulders, so he can’t see her dress, just her face. “You’re a dork.”
“I know.” He leans in for a kiss. “That’s all I wanted.”
“Definitely worth the risk of a lifetime of bad luck. Go back to your dressing room. If you don’t make it to our wedding because you were too busy trying to climb in my window, I’m never going to forgive you.”
He gives her one more kiss and pulls back. “Don’t worry. I wouldn’t miss it.”
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Text
One Hell of A Birthday
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BUCKY BARNES X READER
Prompt (Anon request): may i request a oneshot where bucky and the rest can't spend your birthday w/ you bc of an event he has to attend and you feel kinda sad and end up hanging out w/ an ex and accidentally showing that in a facetime w/ the fam making them tease overprotective boyfriend bucky c: 
Words: 1183.
A/N: I’m so sorry it took so long, but my life is hectic right now. Thank you so much for requesting, dear! Requests are open.
MASTERLIST
“I’m sorry, doll,” he finished, his voice wavering a little.
“Bucky, it’s okay, I get it,” you said.
You really understood the situation, even if you didn’t like it.
Your birthday was in two days and Bucky, your boyfriend, wouldn’t be able to spend it with you. He, along with the team, got a track of an enemy base and had to take it down. Finding the location would take longer than anyone anticipated.
You really understood the situation, but you weren’t happy about it. In fact, pretty sad.
“I really wish I could do something about this.”
“I know.  Me too.”
You finished the call making him promise to be careful and kick some ass.
***
You’ve had a pretty bad day. And it was your birthday.
As a matter of fact, ‘pretty bad’ seems like an understatement. For starters, Bucky and the rest couldn’t be there. You had to work; okay, only the morning shift, but it was still morning. Your alarm malfunctioned and you were late, which wasn’t good for your relation with your boss. Then, work never seemed to end. As you were leaving - starving because you had absolutely no time to take a break for a snack and you didn’t bring anything with you because you were late – rain started pouring. You managed to get home after two hours in traffic and subways, dripping wet and sporting a headache. You were supposed to go out to eat tonight, so any food you were hoping to have for lunch simply didn’t exist in your apartment. Which made you change clothes and go to the grocery store.
Your family was supposed to arrive at 5 p.m. that day, so you were picking some things to actually cook at your house. Taking the day you had so far, you were not making yourself available to another thing going wrong (like maybe your reservations).
Your phone ringing brought you back to reality.
“Hello?”
“[Y/n], hi!” your mother exclaimed on the phone. “Happy birthday!”
“Thanks, mom,” you smiled, relieved to hear her voice. You glanced at the clock hanging on the wall near the fruits, “Wait. Weren’t you supposed to be on the plane an hour ago?”
“[Y/n], the flight was canceled. Something about the weather here, no places are taking off,” she sighed. “I’m sorry, honey, but we won’t be able to go spend your birthday with you.”
“It’s okay, mom. I really wanted to see everyone, but I understand.” What else could you say?
You finished the call and sighed. What an amazing birthday; no family, no friends, no boyfriend, no plans. You shouldn’t have left your bed this morning.
“[Y/n]?”
You turned toward the source of the voice and came face to face with someone you didn’t expect.
There you saw him: Harry. Your ex-boyfriend.
“Harry, hi!”
He surprisingly embraced you in a hug. He was smiling he pulled back.
“I was thinking about you,” he said.
“Really?”
“Yeah. I saw the date and I remembered that today was your birthday.” His smile then became softer, “Happy birthday.”
You smiled back, “Thanks, Harry.”
“So, big plans tonight?” he asked, glancing at you while picking some apples from the pile behind you.
You could say ‘yes’. You could, you definitely could seem like pretty busy person with lots of friends to party with on your birthday. But what is the gain in that?
You shrugged. “Not really.”
“Wanna talk about it?”
So you ended up telling him the entire story.
“Wow,” he sighed, “You’ve had a rough day.”
“Yeah. But it’s okay. I’ll pick some ice cream and binge watch some show tonight. Hopefully, nothing else will go wrong.” You really hoped so.
Harry scratched the back of his neck.
“If you want, maybe I could stop by. Keep you some company or something.” Upon seeing your face, he quickly added, “Just as friends! I wouldn’t want to intrude between you and your boyfriend.”
What would be the harm in that?
***
And that’s how you ended up alone with your ex-boyfriend at your apartment on your birthday.
Harry was currently serving the dinner he had bought when you received a Skype call from Bucky and ended up telling him who you were spending your birthday with.
“Bucky, we’re friends. Nothing more,” you said for the billionth time.
“I know, and I get that,” he answered, “But it had to be him?
“Who? Be who? Are you talking to [Y/n]?”
Suddenly, the entire team was trying to fit into the screen, all talking and wishing you happy birthday at the same time.
You couldn’t help but laugh at the scene. “Thanks, guys.”
“[Y/n]?” Harry called when he reentered the living room, a bit hesitant since you were talking on the phone. He expected you’d get some of those when he was there, but didn’t know if you wanted people to know he was there and he didn’t want to cause any trouble.
“Who’s that?” Nat asked, pulling the camera towards her.
“Did your family made a nice flight?” Steve asked, pulling the camera to him.
“Did they enjoy the reservation?” Tony squeezed himself between the two.
“Are you having a nice birthday?” Wanda jumped on Steve’s back and gripped her arms around his neck to secure herself.
“Did you get out present?” Sam appeared near close to the camera.
“It didn’t explode, did it?” the camera focused on Bruce, standing kind of afraid on the side with everyone, including you, screaming, “What?!”
“I didn’t get your present, so I don’t know if it exploded. My family never came, they were stuck in the airport due to the bad weather. I canceled the reservation, none of you guys were here. And I was talking to a friend, Harry.”
Somewhere between your explanations, everyone fit on the screen again.
“Who’s Harry?” Thor asked. “Is he a brave warrior?”
“Nope,” Sam replied, smirking. “He’s [Y/n]’s ex-boyfriend.”
“What?!”
“Sam, how the hell do you know?” you asked, confused.
“I happen to have my ways, [Y/L/n],” he mocked, scrunching his lips and snapping his fingers in a ‘Z’ form. What you didn’t see was the way he and Tony high-fived behind Thor’s back.
“Let me get this straight: [Y/l] is spending her birthday with her ex-boyfriend and not with the overprotective – and needless to say, currently – boyfriend?” Tony asks, a teasing tone to his voice and a grin on his face.
“Yes.”
“Oh, Barnes, you’re never hearing the end of this, my friend.”
“If you want, Asgard could use a powerful warrior such as yourself,” you heard Thor saying quietly to Bucky.
Two days later, after they returned home and you made them have a few hours of sleep and Tony sent a private plane to pick up your family, they took you out to dinner on your favorite restaurant and even invited Harry. The entire time the team spent teasing Bucky, who made Harry seat far away from you on the giant table. You had never laughed as hard as that night.
Oh. And their present didn’t explode. Until Tony switched a few cables. 
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centerice · 7 years
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lmao i’m gna harcore vent rn bc literally no one talks to me ever so yeah 
y’all today just sucked like i cant believe i’m doing this rn bc this is not something i normally do 
anyway,,, my day started out w my friend cancelling plans so she could hang out w someone else (( we had these plans for a week, and then, coincidentally, the day of the plans, she cancels )) ok?????, and then after that i tried finding someone to come to my cabin with me next weekend and i asked a couple ppl and they both were already doing things, which i totally understand, i’m not asking for anyone to drop their plans for me, but i still have to go up to my cabin alone, for the first time ever, and it just sucks because i have no friends and i really don’t understand why. i’m so nice and i try really hard to be kind to others and i just constantly get shit on... so then i was already pretty bummed at this point, not having any friends and the friends that i thought i had bailing on me so i asked my mom to take me to taco bell bc yeah i love taco bell a lot,,,, but anyway she then proceeded to tell me i eat my feelings which is so rude? like i just wanted some taco bell ????? and so what if i do? am i not allowed to find comfort in food? literally all i wanted was a crunchwrap like is that so wrong? soooooooo after that,,, my mom pretty much blamed herself for me having no friends and offered me to go to public school ( i go to a small private school ) for my senior year, which i don’t really want to do because it would just be hard to move and not have any friends and not know where tf i’m going in the halls n stuff and yeah idk i know this is all just minimal bullshit and its rly petty but idk why its affecting me so much so the theme of my summer so far is “being shit on by friends i thought i had” and it just sucks bc i try rly hard to be nice to everyone but i get ignored or treated like shit so  ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ and then,,,,, now we are getting to the annoying shit.... so my dad came back from a business trip today and we started talking about hockey which isn’t abnormal or anything but we were talking about two players who you can’t really compare them, because they play the game differently and just judging on points or goals alone isn’t all that they bring to the game and he is trying to tell me that points are the only aspect of hockey that matters, which to me is absolutely wild because he himself played hockey and sdbfjbgjsdfbjlakbfvkljsblkjas who tf thinks that ???? and then he proceeded to laugh at me and what i was saying and you can tell it was just because i’m a woman and obviously i can’t make educated thoughts about sports because the fucking earth would explode and its so fucking annoying because i don’t understand why he doesn’t respect me? he yelled at me earlier today on the phone for no fucking reason and i was so mad because i don’t deserve to be treated this way u know and i love my parents they are great people and they love me very much and treat me fantastically but sometimes what they say to me just doesn’t make sense idk and so i’ve just been so stressed bc i have no friends and summer is supposed to be fun and this summer has been kinda shitty so far 
anyway i’m glad i’m done w that and done being emo...... if u made it this far i can’t believe u stayed wow what a person 
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whatwecantfight · 4 years
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Dreams. Vivid Dreams.
Day something of whatever this corn teen life.  I think we’re working our way into week four. Also known as holy week..aka Easter is this sunday. Has it been cancelled? haha just kidding, my parents gave me the death stare when i threw that joke out. Chillee, i’d like to believe Jesus had a sense of humor despite no humor in the Bible. Anyway, this corn teen has got me dreaming vivid dreams of weird anger, confusion, and weirdly, a sense of love of mainly from my deceased aunt visiting me in my dream. But mostly just pissy when i wake up though. :) Figured i’d share them with whomever caught this blog and is reading.  Hope youre sane wherever you are, living in a time where fear is overpowered by every other emotion we probably could ever face in our life time. 
week 1; dream 1: I was attending the Burmese church on 21st ave and Geary. The church i knew inside and out and could navigate blindfolded, but thats an unnecessary fact. Anyway, i walked into the womens bathroom with my mom in the other stall. A woman by the name of Esther Wong, Grace Wongs sister, that i’ve known since childhood but was EXTREMELY confused as to why she appeared because i havent seen her in maybe 15-20 years..had walked up to me and told me i looked really dark skinned and ugly, where did i come back from? This usually happens normally in our culture as they have no filter or realize how rude they sound.  IRL, i would have probably said something snarky and walked away....however, in this dream....i was so appalled, i slapped her sooo hard, cussed her out, and walked off.. all with my mom in the bathroom just going along with her business. I walk up to the service which seemed like we were at the SJ burmese church and plop next to my dad.  Sure enough, I see Uncle John and Uncle Johnson walking towards me to reprimand me for slapping the living daylights out of this woman.  (these two Johns are usually the 2cent Kings) So i get up and walk off and weirdly enough, my dad, for once, has my back and backs me up..and because i was SO SHOCKED MY DAD had my back and was fending them off for me, my eyes opened and i’m angry. furious. Furious that anyone would talk so rudely to me and that i wasnt a child anymore and finally defended myself. And i just lay there like WOW HOW THE HELL COULD SHE HAVE SAID SOMETHING TO ME... for all i know shes dead IRL.
week2; dream 2: Though this one was the most entertaining, i could barely remember any of it, but the climax of the story is the best. Whatever happened prior, i have no clue but since i live in the basement of my parents slave quarters and their room is right above mines.. i usually hear a lot of their arguments.  This one was tooo real. I hear my dad screaming at the top of his lungs at my mom and for once i dont hear my mom arguing back. Turns out hes screaming at her for being a slut! She had cheated and done something with a friend of theirs and she was apologetic. My eyes opened before the drama got juicier. The end. my moms a secret hoe.
week2; dream 3: We’re church camping but this time in a huge mansion. In this mansion, similar to the Grand Island Mansion in Sac, there were many secret compartments to get to other parts of the house. Me and Alyssa C. would go through all these really claustrophobic tunnels to get to peoples rooms. My most memorable part of this dream was that Aunty Snow (deceased IRL) was there in her usual bed watching her soaps on tv and letting us just go in and out of her closet with a secret door. Then i woke up because i missed her too much and couldnt believe how real that felt.
week3; dream 4: Ed was some guy i dated couple of years ago and he had randomly reached out to me to ask if i had a place in SF to stay. Mind you, he lives in sf and has a beautiful apt that sits on top of twin peaks IRL. He asked if him and his fiance could stay at my place after his vacation and i didnt question it and just said yes! i have a spot...then realized where do i have a spot for him in my house?! Thankfully, my sister was also staying at her company’s apt for remote employees. So i sent them there, which happened to also be my aunts house that she rents out right next to Ocean Beach.  She had remodeled this house and was beautifully modern.  So i let them in and tell them to hang on as i get their beds ready. Instead of getting the beds ready, i pop an edible and it hits me so hard (10mg, i usually take 40mg) and not only doesnt it hit me hard, i have vertigo off of it.  I cant even open my eyes to talk to Ed and his fiance. Thought about my sister being pissed that i let them into her work apt..sure enough she comes home with 6 of our mutual girlfriends from LA visiting, PISSED. Her coworkers family of 3 also stayed at this place at the same time.  But i was more concerned that i tied my hair and a WHOLE CHUNK fell out of my head, a chunk meaning someone cutting their pony tail off to donate.. THAT type of chunk. confused and freaking out at the same time my sister was coming home, i ran to her to show her and looked at the mirror and OMG MY HAIRLINE WAS IN THE MIDDLE OF MY HEAD! she was so mad she didnt even ask me to join them for dinner and my LA friends didnt talk to me either. With my vertigo, i just went back into the room to figure out where to put Ed and Fiance or... how to tell them that this isnt going to work and they would have to go back to their home. More stressed about my hair, my eyes popped open..back in reality, with a FULL head of hair. Amen. 
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Houston Texas Cheap car insurance quotes zip 77248
"Houston Texas Cheap car insurance quotes zip 77248
Houston Texas Cheap car insurance quotes zip 77248
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Our car insurance was expiring on the 28th of may. We had all the premium paid by the end of march. At the end of april we got rid of the car. Couple of days later we received renewal documents from the insurance company. We have been with those company for 2 years, we didn' t make any claims. For the past 2 years we were paying 102 pounds a month. The renewal documents were saying that we only got the 1 year NCB and that our monthly instalment is going to be 140 pounds a month. I rang them on the 6th of may and said that first of all we have 2years of NCB and we want the documents from them proving that , second of all I have asked how come the instalment went from 100 pounds to 140 pounds a month the nice guy explained that there was a mistake (in their system 1 year of NBC was showing) and now it has been sorted and we are going to receive the proof of 2 years NBC and the monthly instalment is going to be 100 pounds. I thanked the guy and said that we do not wish to extend the insurance and I am only waiting for the 2years of NBC. He said ok and I thought it was sorted. We went on holiday abroad on 21st of May and got back on the 7th of June and imagine my surprise when in the post I have found the letter from insurance company with the certificate of insurance enclosed and them thanking me for deciding to stay with them and saying that my monthly instalment is 130 pounds!!! (because apparently i decided not to the the brakedown cover that i had before!!!!) I decided to call them first thing in the morning, but befor I did it i checked my account and of course they have already debited it with 130 pounds. I called them and the woman there explained that they were never informed of not extending the policy and that of course they have it registered that i phoned on the 6th of may with questions but they called me and left a message on my voicemail and apparently i never rang them back. She explained that all I have to do is to send the certificate of motor insurance back and then i will get the money. So i did. Once they got it they rang me saying that now they want the proof of selling/scrapping the car, WHY???I do not think it is any of their business. Especially that as far as I am concerned I am not cancelling the policy , I never wanted it. It is all their fault they did not listen. Can I do something about it, I have also got the funny feeling they are not going to give me full refund that they are gonna come up with something.""
Should I call my insurance company?
Last fall I hit a raccoon really hard and it ruined my front spoiler and my radiator, the damage was under my deductable so I decided to just buy the parts on my own. Since I don't drive the car in the winter I parked the car over the winter I decided to just put the car into storage and buy the parts in the spring, so I bought the parts, installed them and now I found out that my motor is ruined from the car overheating after I hit the raccoon. and its going to cost a ton of money to get everything fixed on this car. Would I be able to claim something like this even though it happened 6 months ago?""
""Cheap insurance cars, help me choose.?
I'm looking for a 2002 car and I'm thinking of: Ford fiesta 1.1 Vauxhall corsa 1.2 Toyota yaris 1.0 Nissan Micra 1.0 I would welcome other options and choices And your opinion will count! I want to get a cheap insurance and I can afford up to 2.300
17 year old car insurance prices ?
im comparing cars on moneysupermarket because im 16 an need a heads up on insurances costs etc... but i compared a classis mini 1.0- annual: 6000 and Monthly: 650 also, 2007 vauxhall corsa 1.0- annual: 8000 Monthly: 852 and a 1993 Ford Fiesta 1.1- annual: 12000 Monthly: 1152 now i can sort of understand the price for the mini, due to its a small car with a small engine, but the corsa's like brand new? how can the insurance be sort of lowish. but why are they charging huge amounts for a fiesta that is older than me and is probably falling to piece's slowly ? im so confused :S can some one help me and please explain this i really want to be able to have a first car at 17 but at this rate i might be stuck on a motorcycle for a few years then maybe have enough money to afford a car :/""
Is it legal to use foreign car insurance in the UK?
I'm a 17 year old male and I've just passed my driving test, I'm trying to think of every and any way possible to get car insurance as cheap as possible. I was wondering whether it's possible to purchase and use car insurance from a foreign company in the UK and if it is possible whether you could have a policy on an English car or whether i'd have to purchase an import. Thanks in advance.""
What types of insurance are required in Minnesota?
I have a permit test in about an hour and I forgot what kinds of insurance are required in the state of Minnesota? There are 2 of them I think it's liability and no fault? Help please?
Houston Texas Cheap car insurance quotes zip 77248
Houston Texas Cheap car insurance quotes zip 77248
Can I get renter's insurance without a deductible?
Yesterday I got a quote from Geico on renters insurance. They said that I would have $6,000 personal belongings protection, $100,000 personal liability, with a $500 deductible. This would cost me $142 a year. I'm okay with the coverage amounts and the cost of the policy but I would like to get a smaller or zero deductible. Is this possible with renters insurance? Also Geico doesn't write the policy they use someone else but didn't want to what company it is. Can I get a zero deductible? What insurance company should I go with?""
Can someone please tell me why used Audi's or so cheap?? Can someone help me pick which used car to buy!?
2003 BMW 325I 84K Miles $10,900 2002 Audi S4 64K Miles $10,900 2005 Audi A4 1.8T AWD 79K Miles $10,900 2006 Honda Civic EX 1.8 75K Miles $10,900 2003 Infiniti G35 sedan 64K Miles $10,900 insurance is no problem, all these are clean car fax, clean title, all under KBB value, the infiniti is $3,000 under value, the rest are about $1000 under value. Any ideas why Audi are so cheap? im just looking for about a 10-11,000 car with low miles. Which should i pick?""
300zx insurance quote?
I am currently 18 years old and i am trying to buy a manual nissan 300zx. I am currently accident free and I wanted to know the approximate cost for insurance?
""How much would insurance cost me for a $200,000 porsche as a teen?????? PLZZ HELP GUYS PLZ!!!!!!?""
Im planning to buy a $200,000 porsche drive away. Im going to get superior insurance (the best insurance) that covers my car fully. HOWEVER the problem is im a teen 19 year old and insurance rates appparently fly above the sky. HOW much will it cost insurance a year????????????????????? ?????????????????/""
How much do you pay for full coverage car insurance?
i'm 19 and going to buy a car soon but i'm trying to get a ball park figure on how much i can expect to pay
How to get car insurance cheaper for new drivers?
How to get car insurance cheaper for new drivers?
Cheap motorcycle insurance?
anybody noe of some cheap motorcycle insurance im only 17 and im planning on getting a 250cc dis coming summer and i cant spend 300 or more a month thats to much pls help.
Car insurance - My car is totalled - what now?
my car is totaled according to the insurace company. It is the other person at fault so their insurance is dealing with it. I feel as if I'm getting the runaround a bit. How will they determine a fair value of the car and what if I don't agree with what they offer? They have also given me a rental which they tell me I must return once the agreement is made and I will be out of town and cannot return it for a week. They said I have to pay for the rental of the days I am gone!!!!!! Do I have to agree to their terms or how do I go about handling this situation? HELP i don't like dealing with this stuff but I don't want to be screwed over Thanks
Has any one used Insurance.Comparisons.org?
I saw one of those 'sidebar' ad's that seems too good to be true about discounted car insurance rates. I did not find any info about the company via Google, so have any of you guys heard or know anything about this company? I have a feeling it is one of those 'you get what you pay for' type of schemes, with vague answers to access your personal info. Thanks""
Non-vehicle owner driver's insurance?
I just got my drivers licensce today. I need insurance to drive even though I don't own my own car and will use my parents?
Homeowners insurance or renters insurance?
Okay so the person we were renting from had bought a house and is owner financing it for us. We just moved in and I was calling around about insurance and have been told so many things it's ridiculous! A few insurance companies told me I need homeowners insurance and a few told me I need renter insurance since the title is in his name not mine which makes sense but I don't want to end up with the wrong type of insurance. Help?!
How can I find a good car insurance comp. if I don't have a driver licence? I can't get a drivers lic. help!
I can't get a driver lic. because I don't have a social #, and I can't get a social # because I don't have a visa, BUT I know in Houston Tx, I can get car insurance like I'm now, but which one with a affordable price? please help!!!!""
""Dealt with car accident outside of insurance company, how can I chase up the receipt?""
On Christmas Day I went out in the car to pick up some drinks from the petrol station and on the way out of the station I bumped someones car. I stopped and got out to give them my details (name, address and phone number) and then went home. In the panic of the moment I think I just wanted to get home as it was Christmas Day and I didn't hang around to take photos, ask for witnesses or discuss options with the other driver, which in hindsight I regret and realise was stupid. When I got home, the guy called me up and, again with the stupid mistakes, I said that I would rather settle outside of insurance; the driver wasn't keen on the idea at first and wanted to settle through the insurance company but I couldn't call them until the next week as they were closed for Christmas. He texted me the next day saying that he was going to get a quote from a garage and got back to me later with a quote for 400 through a 'friend of a friend's garage'. At this point I was a bit suspicious and the amount seemed very high for what I thought was not a lot of damage but at the same time he said that he either wanted to do it like that or through the insurance and I really didn't want to loose my no-claims discount as insurance for young male drivers is very high without the no-claims. In the end I decided to pay him, not without a certain bitterness owing to the fact that he was pressuring me for an immediate decision, which also made me suspicious. Having sent the cheque for 400, he kept up communications initially and let me know that he'd received it. He said that he would send me a copy of the receipt from the garage for my records but once he received the cheque I never heard back and now cannot get a reply. Bit long-winded for a question but that's the background story, my question is two-fold: 1. Can I do anything about it? It's more the principle than the money that bothers me, I know that I caused damage to his car but I now suspect it wasn't as much as he claimed. 2. Does 400 sound like too much or should I stop worrying about it? I hit the back corner of his car with the back corner of mine, and he later told me that I had cracked the rear bumper, which needed replacing. I'm not sure of the make of the car but I think it may have been a Ford Fiesta or something similar. I would really appreciate any help as it's weighing on my mind... I don't like people walking over me. At least if the amount he claimed sounds reasonable I can put it down to him being a wanker but the amount claimed being fair and forget about the whole thing.""
Cheap car insurance for young male drivers?
where is the best place to get cheap car insurance for a young male driver??
AUTO INSURANCE FOR YOUNG DRIVERS?
I've been driving since about last summer, and i've tried looking for some auto insurance inexpensive something i can afford, no luck so far, i heard there is a government sponsored insurance that can help people out so they wont be driving around without insurance? is this true? or does anyone know cheap auto insurance, im a good driver its just check points really scare me when im out during the weekends. thanks!""
How much would insurance cost?
I am a 16 year old female who just got my license in January. I get good grades, but just a few days ago rear-ended the car in front of me. I totaled my car, and caused minimal damage to the one in front of me. How much should my insurance be on a monthly basis?""
Life insurance policy?
for 5 million dollars for 5 kids. A million per child. Two are 18+ and receive money right away. Younger 3 will live with one of the elder. How much will the bank cut each month to take care of the younger children (7,8,and 17)? The money (full million) stays in the bank for each until they turn 18.""
Can i get insurance to drive any car?
My current insurance gives me third party cover on any vehicle i drive with permission from the owner. Can i get full insurance? (i am thinking of setting up a business which would require me driving other peoples cars) THanks
Where can i find cheap young drivers insurance in uk?
where can i find cheap young drivers insurance in uk
Can you buy a car without having to buy car insurance for it? ?
Well I'm 18 and just recently passed my test. I was just wondering if you could buy a car without buying the insurance. Some people have told me that you can buy a car but need car tax to keep it parked on the road whilst others say that you need car insurance to keep the car on public road :/? Which one is right?! Pluss I live in the UK
Pay out of pocket for my car or go through my insurance company?
I live on a hill. Last week, in a quirky weather situation, the street I live on got super-slick just long enough for my 2000 Toyota Camry to go into a 300' free-slide down the hill and crash into a curb and a tree. It was a one-car accident, no one was injured. The repairman can only give me a rough estimate at this time but he thinks it'd cost about $1500 to repair using old body parts, although he says it could cost more if he finds more damage as he goes along--in that case he thinks it might cost up to $2,000 to patch it up out of pocket. I asked him about the pros and cons of paying out of pocket vs. going through insurance in my particular case. He said that if I chose to go through insurance--which would mean getting a USAA adjuster out and all--that he was thinking it would probably cost $2500 to repair, maybe more if it turned out there was more damage that he could see at this time. But he pointed out that I'd have to pay the deductible (which I think is $500 for my car, not sure) and that my insurance rates would go up. But then you'd end up with a new-looking car. [as opposed to a patched-up looking car]. My husband absolutely wants to pay out of pocket--he does not want to involve our auto insurance company, saying, The insurance company is only for the big accidents. But I'd like to keep this car for several more years if I can because there's no car out there that I like better, so I'm wondering if maybe it might be worth going through the insurance company. Here's a little more information: My 2000 Toyota Camry has 115,000 miles on it and has been very reliable over the years. The motor wasn't damaged and, in fact the car is already driving well again except that one headlight and blinker are broken. There is, of course, body damage to the front and hood, plus a 6 crack over the left back tire (not very deep), which occurred when I backed out of the tree, slid again, and hit the curb on the opposite side of the street. Re: Our insurance situation? We (me and my 3 driving age children) had a string of costly minivan accidents in the 1990s: 1. one in 1997 when my daughter totaled my van, and got sued for injuries by 2 people in the other car (the lawsuit was settled many years ago but it dragged out for years). 2. one by me, a one-car accident, no injuries, our insurance company paid for the damage minus the deductible 3. 2 accidents caused by other drivers, so my insurance company didn't have to pay any damages--I don't know if USAA takes accidents caused by other people into consideration or not. 4. My son totaled my van in 2000 [which is why my current car is a year 2000]. So we have not called upon our insurance company for any expenses for almost 11 years now. Regarding traffic tickets? I got one 3-4 years ago for speeding--35 or 40 mph in a 25 mph zone-. If my points from this ticket have expired by now (not sure), then there are no other points on our record. Our children are now out of the nest and only one of them borrows our car when she comes to visit once every month or two. I put less than 10,000 miles/year on my car for work and vacations. We live in PA. So my question is this: Given the age of the car, amount of damage, etc., is it worth going through our insurance company to get the car fixed rather than pay OOP--or would going through insurance raise our insurance premiums so much that it wouldn't be worth it?""
Insurance quote!!!!!!!!?
abut how much will it cost to insure a 2002 suburban for a 16 yearold male in dallas texas with a 3.5 gpa
Insurance on car?
My dad said insurance on the car I want will be $700 a month.(I'm 18 and its for full coverage) Is that the price I pay if the car is insured under my name? I know if my dad insured the car under his name the price for insurance would drastically drop. My question is would I still be able to drive the car if its insured under my dads name and still be part of the whole insurance thing. You guys, the reason I sold my old car is becouse I wanted this newer car I've wited 3 months so far and I'm planning to pay for the car myself. But insurance is going to kill me. If you can also tell me about some good insurance companies out there that are cheap(we have something century rite now). When I heared how much it would cost I almost cried.""
What is the average cost for insurance?
I am 18 Years old, and I know it seems to be more expensive when your younger. But if someone could help me out if you know the insurance cost per month with just state minimum coverage. and maybe some companies I could check out??""
Cheap car to insure mpg above 25?
Looking for a car that you may have had experience with that is cheap to insure, with decent mpg. I was looking at '95 and '97 civics because they are older and I thought might be cheaper to insure and get pretty good mileage from what Ive heard. Mainly looking 4 doors not too shabby low insurance and decent mileage. Thanks in advance for responses everyone""
Houston Texas Cheap car insurance quotes zip 77248
Houston Texas Cheap car insurance quotes zip 77248
Cheapest auto insurance rate in NJ ??? I have a perfect driving record....?
I just moved from Boston and don't know what companies are the cheapest ??? Any suggestions ??
Car insurance for someone driving my car? lil bit complicated =)?
My boyfriend drives my car occasionally and my full-coverage insurance will cover him and my car if he were to get in an accident. However, since I am still a student in college I'm on my parents' car insurance (have to pay them back once I graduate =P ) and they say that they don't want anyone who's not on the insurance policy to get in an accident and raise the family's rates, e.g. he's not allowed to drive the car. Understandable, however they won't add him onto our policy even if he pays his share himself. Now it's their prerogative, I'm not questioning that, but is there ANY way to purchase him automobile insurance that get's tapped FIRST in the event of an accident? ...To backtrack a little I've just researched non-owners policies, but they seem to work only after the initial insurance of the car (in my case my family's insurance) get's used up and the non-owner's insurance is used as a last resort; this still raises my family's insurance rates if there was an accident with him as the driver even if he had his own insurance. Does anybody know of any types of insurance that covers him driving my car without raising my parent's rates in the event of an accident? Thank you in advance! =) Oh and please don't say that he shouldn't be driving my car, etc. It's more of a hypothetical question as he rarely does but I'm getting tired of my parents getting on me when things happen, like getting the stomach flu when we're out and about and having him drive home, telling my mom later when im miserable, and her saying i don't care that you had the stomach flu he can't drive your car without his own insurance. Yay. Thanks, Mom.""
Car Insurance Advice - Florida Needed?
I have been going over my policy and lowered my PIP. I have a 9 yr old SUV so no comp and collision, I would like someone with insurance or legal experience to look over my coverage and tell me if sufficient. I am a home owner with no equity. I have no other assets other than an ROTH IRA and bank accounts with about $1000. or detailed coverage descriptions, hover over the associated below 2003 MITSUBISHI MNTROSPXLS Total Vehicle Premium: $466.00 Protects you and your passengers Bodily Injury Liability [Edit] Current Limit: $20,000/$20,000 $167.00 Property Damage Liability [Edit] Current Limit: $50,000 $136.80 Personal Injury Protection-Insured [Edit] Current Deductible: $1,000 Ded. $162.20 Personal Injury Protection-Insured & Relative [Add] Current: Not Carried Not Carried Personal Injury Protection -Insured with Excluded Work Loss [Add] Current: Not Carried Not Carried Personal Injury Protection -Insured and Relative with Excluded Work Loss [Add] Current: Not Carried Not Carried Additional Personal Injury Protection Insured [Add] Current: Not Carried Not Carried Additional Personal Injury Protection Insured and Relative [Add] Current: Not Carried Not Carried Medical Payments [Add] Current: Not Carried Not Carried Uninsured Motorist - Nonstacked [Add] Current: Not Carried Not Carried Uninsured Motorist - Stacked [Edit] Current Limit: I Reject this Coverage $0.00 Protects your vehicles 2003 MITSUBISHI MNTROSPXLS Comprehensive [Add] Deductible Not Carried Collision [Add] Deductible Not Carried Emergency Road Service [Add] Not Carried Rental Reimbursement [Add] Not Carried""
Renting a car with no insurance.?
Hello there, I'm over 25 and have a driver's license but I currently don't own a car therefore I do not have car insurance. I know that usualy when you rent a car and you have car insurance, you won't have to pay extra for rental car insurance. How does that work if I don't have insurance right now? Is extra insurance from the rental company expensive? Or would they even let me rent a car (only for a couple of days when I go to my cousin's wedding out of state) if I don't have car insurance? Any insights would help! I would hate to show up and not be able to rent a car and have to call someone to come get me. Thanks!""
Two insurance on the same car?
My dad has insurance on Saga and his policy ends beginning of October. I (age 19) wanted to insure on the same car from June till October but saga wouldn't let me (since I'm not 50). Is it possible for him to take another insurance from June onwards for a year and add me as a second driver till October and the take me out - while keeping Saga/s insurance running at the same time??
If im a second driver on my dads car when i get older will my insurance get cheaper?
Hi if im a second driver on my dads car when i get older will my insurance get cheaper or not because im the second driver my dad has a vauxhall astra 1.6 its 11 years old and how much do you think the insurance will be im 17 year old boy
Car insurance excess?
I'm having trouble understanding how car insurance, repairs and excess works in VIC, Australia. I gather that the driver who is at fault pays an excess to his insurance company before his vehicle is repaired, and his insurance company covers the repairs for the other vehicle involved. Will this excess see both vehicles being repaired, or do two excesses need to be payed?""
""My car insurance company sent me forms to fill out, after an accident. Do I need to do it?""
The police report states that I am not at fault. The passenger in my was badly hurt. My insurer wants me/my passenger to fill out a medical release/history form. I see no benefit in doing so. If the other driver does not have insurance, and we are not yet sure that they do, my insurer would pay my claim/my passengers claim under my uninsured coverage. If they have my passenger's medical history, they could try to find reasons to limit how much to pay out. They also want me to fill out a Report of Traffic Accident form. I have given a statement to the police, who said I'm not at fault. The other driver was cited, and I have also given an oral/recorded statement to my insurer. I don't' see the need to fill out an accident form. It just seems that my insurer is trying to cover their on *** in case my uninsured coverage kicks in. What if I don't fill these form out?""
Is there a big differents in the price of car insurance?
hi is there a big differents in the price of car insurance between a mini copper and a mini one for a first car for a 17 year old
""How much will my insurance premium go up after a speeding ticket, I'm 17?""
I am a 17 year old male whose car insurance is roughly $200 a month from Travelers. My parents (unlike me, haha) are perfect drives and have had no recent violations. On the other hand, I got pulled over in MASS for doing 86 in a 65. It won't happen again. I live in CT. How much do you think this will increase by? and when I renew could my insurance company decide to not run my DMV record?""
Would insurance cover this????
Hi, I have All State Insurance in California, full coverage. I just got my truck a year ago, brand new, my car has been hit many times by people who slam their doors, also, I have many dents that came out of nowhere, actually on the roof. Would insurance cover this, since it wasn't collision? Is there coverage for auto reconditioning ?""
Hello All. I need Affordable Dental insurance (NJ). Any recommendations?
Hello All. I need Affordable Dental insurance (NJ). Any recommendations?
Why do I have to pay first year homeowners insurance?
I'm in the process of purchasing a home. I'm taking out a FHA loan and my broker stated that I would have to purchase first year homeowners insurance for a year. My question is my monthly taxes, PMI, and also home insurance is already infused in my monthly mortgage payment,so why is that I have to pay for a years worth of insurance when I'm making a monthly payment on it anyways? Will I being paying twice? Can someone please explain""
Car insurance help please ?
I'm 18 and I am soon to be having a car, (hopefully) now everybody in the UK knows hows stupid car insurance is for new/young drivers. my dad says he will not put me on his insurance as IF i had a crash and needed to claim it would knock off his no claims, that is perfectly understanding but wile looking on Moneysupermarket i noticed the (protect no claims) if i was a named driver on my dads insurance would i get that cheaper, i know later in life i'm gonna have to start my own but thats for when im on more money at work etc, so what i am asking would this work out? and everybody becomes a winner? thank you for any help (im only looking for a Ford Fiesta mk2/3 1.0/1.1)""
How exactly do you get health/car insurance?
I'm 18 and I moved out to live with my gparents and will be moving out again on my own soon and I don't have any idea how to get health insurance and car insurance.
Can I take out a life insurance policy on my child's father?
My ex is a very big risk taker and our son is only two years old. Being a single mom is very financially straining and if he was to die I would have to go onto public assistance. Is there a way I could take out a life insurance policy on him where I am the beneficiary? I'm terrified that he will do something stupid and wind up dead and my son and I will be stuck living off of welfare.
""Which company offers the cheapest auto insurance in Snohomish County, WA?""
It's my first time having to get car insurance - I know there are a lot of factors, but I'm just looking for a general answer - not just Geico, Allstate, State Farm, etc..... Thank you :)""
Which auto insurance company is better? Geico or Mercury? Please share your personal experience.?
Which auto insurance company is better? Geico or Mercury? Please share your personal experience.?
How do I get a homeowners insurance for an LLC?
Me and a partner have an LLC under which we own the home we live in. We are now looking for a homeowners insurance but are having some difficulties finding one for an LLC. How do we go about this?
Car insurance help..?
I just asked this question but i'll add more details--------------------- About me - I pass my test 06/03/12 And bought a car and insurance - 10/03/12 ( the car was a vauxhall corsa) I still have the vauxhall and it's insured untull the 10th of March. I'm buying a suzuki swift today and want to insure it but It's cheaper if i have 1 year No claims bonus (NCB). To get my NCB i have to wait until the 10th and i dont mind that what's bothering me is I want to sell my Corsa before or after the 10th or whatever to a garage so not private sale and still have my NCB. Is there something a garage can do where i take it to them on the day my insurance ends and they keep it until it ends? I haven't insured the suzuki AT ALL yet and i'm relying on my NCB as it takes a huge chunk out of the money. thanks.
""I need help getting good and affordable health, life and dental insurance for me and my family-please help?""
All I have is Medicaid, I want better dental and health insurance, and my family and I don't have life insurance. When my dad died he didn't have life insurance. I'm a bit concerned because I'm in my 30s and my mom's getting old, and I'm concerned about my little brother. My mother doesn't have dental insurance. I want my brother to have better dental insurance too. I need dental implants. Please help me out.""
Life insurance thc test?
Does anyone know if country companies tests for thc for their life insurance policies?
Mobile Insurance?
I have a nokia n95 on vodsphone it suddenly started playing up sending messages and makeing phone calls by its self,i have only had it a month if i took it to a vodaphone shop would they fix it??? I have no insurance""
How much is car insurance be?
I am 15 about to be 16 NO record at all.. I have a 1999 ford escort no wrecks 80,000 miles. I would like to know how much car insurance would be and a tag would be and how much my license would be I live in florida. also are their any other fees?""
""What is the penalty for driving without insurance on a motorbike, as i feel it was a genuine oversight?""
I was stopped because of a broken rear light and as it happens my insurance had expired about 4 days before. I wasn't aware that the insurance expired , i thought it was at the end of the month. I didn't receive any reminder because i had forgotten to change address with the insurance company, which was completely my fault. This is a genuine oversight on my part, but I'm not sure if they'll look at previous incident i had with my cousins car when i was a teenager about 7 years ago, i got caught driving without insurance. Probably one of the stupidest things i have done but i learned from it, but the court may not look at it like that. Should i get a solicitor and does anyone know how much they cost? Will i be suspended from driving?""
Houston Texas Cheap car insurance quotes zip 77248
Houston Texas Cheap car insurance quotes zip 77248
https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/rop-term-life-insurance-michael-nolan/"
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boyshoujo · 6 years
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what kind of music do u listen to??? 👀, i judge people by their music tastes so if u have a shit taste then ur #canceled,,,,,,,,,,,,,, so do u like rock??? do u like sad music????? old (by old i mean from 2000 or 2005 but it can be from 1950 if u want) or new music???? do u like vocaloid???? japanese music???? do u listen to music in other languages???? do u like happy music??? do u care abt the lyrics more or the beat???? what kind of music do u dance to???? name ur 10 fave artists or bands???
blease dont judge me by my music taste……………….. i like everything ?  like………………basically anything but taylor swift/ed sheeran/bastille type of songs lmao but i like everything and anything tbh ???
I TOLD YOU THAT THE CHARMING CHERRIES GAME SUCKS BUT U DIDNT LSITEN AJWKSMKFSICNJ!!!! u picked him “accidentally” huh ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) , abt the donut kink: there was a pic of asra eating a donut, some anon was like “draw asra eating or smoking” so the artist picked the eating, someone tagged it “smoking” cuz asra would never smoke, i didn’t understand and i was like??? “do u mean smoking hot??? actually now that i think abt it the way he’s eating the donut is hot, wow i have a donut kink now…….”
gril i downloaded the charming cherries game BC U TOLD ME TO !! ! ! and i wanted to believe in u !!!!!! ! ! and i wanted to make fun of the fedora guy lmao 👀 wtf i thought u were gonna tell me something #Juicy like u saw some comic about some police officer fucking a donut or something ? but it’s just asra eating a donut ?????? wow :/ disappointing :/
u wanna kno more abt me?? my name starts with an A and ends with an A, and its not angelica JFSLKSDISJUSID!!!!! im still in highschool and im younger than u but its just 2 or 4 years so it doesn’t count lmao,,, im very manly (in my personality not in appearance but im not like a girl at all?? kinda in looks yeah but anything else?? no) AND NO IM NOT A TOMBOY EW KPSIEJDIMDJS!!!!!! ive known a lot of tomboys and let me tell you,,, some of them act like animals,,, u don’t even know if they’re human
is ur name aaliyah ? alayna ? ashana ? adriana ? is ur name [screaming] AAAAAAAAAA ? is ur name Arcana A(non) ? i dont know any a names lmao4 years wtf…………………….. ur a baby lmao!!!!!!!!!!!!! it’s ok if u dont want to reveal urself tbh bc im a stonky Olde person 👴 and tbh ? i wouldnt lolalso tomboys r cute? :/ like some r gross but ? theyre cute ? 
i have cat ears too but its just like an empty triangle and its black,,,, i want the cat ears that move but i don’t know where do i buy it??? and no, i can’t buy it from the internet (amazon) cuz my mom thinks that they’re going to steal her money,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, but isn’t thanksgiving in christmas??? did native americans got killed in christmas?? im not christian so i don’t know shit lol,,,, and u go to an art school???? tell me more abt it 👀
JSKJKLSJFL r u talking about those fancy cat ears that react to ur brainwaves or whatever .. arent those like 29034902348 dollars …(american) thanksgiving is in november, and christmas is in december ! they’re separate holidays lolin america, christian holidays r treated as national holidays lmao :/ (also bc america runs on extreme consumerism and they want a reason for us to buy shit all the time!!!!!!!!) like ?? my grandparents on my dad’s side r buddhist but they still celebrate christmas w us bc its ingrained into the “””American Culture”””” which is kinda lame but yeah lmao :/
GIRL some of the people at my art school r so corny,,,,, like i changed my major from animation to illustration and i instatntly noticed how normal everyone in the illustration department is ??????????? we’re Normies??????? we’re Basic as hell?????? meanwhile all the animation students WERE SO WEIRD I CANT,,,,, like at least 60% of them were furries (INCLUDING THE PROFESSORS KFLJSKJLFD OMG i heard a story about how a bunch of students found one of the professors’ old furaffinity accounts with a bunch of furry porn and KJFLKJSFLJ FKSJFLKFJ I WANT TO DIE THATS SO EMBARRASING! !!  ! ! !) but like . everyone in the animation department speaks in babie voices and says “hewwo???? :3c” or “doge” and other bullshit weird ass tumblr lingo OUT LOUD . in Real Life and im just like ?? ?? why cant yall be normal………bplease……………….. 
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achanceforus-x-blog · 7 years
Text
My story so far
I am writing this to hopefully raise awareness and shed some light on situations people ignore or dismiss. I want to help people no matter what their going through with my words , my wisdom and inspire and give my strength to anyone who feels they have none left. My story so far .. A few major things had happened in the years before hand (Ill save these stories for another time) causing my mental health to deteriorate (such a big problem in our generation, thats just kept so secretive) Feeling lost and deflated keeping quiet about all my problems , our problems keeping shit to myself. Feeling to breathless and anxious to even leave the house for work. Falling out with friends because I was weak they thought I was stupid for all Ive put up with, a toxic relationship. Me and my long term partner would just argue and fuss and fight for hours to the point of ultimate distress on both halves. Neither of us really knew what we wanted when you've been romantic with one person for so long it can get really crazy I believe noones a bad person though I believe people only do bad things and thats the stage we were at doing bad things. The physical altercations got to much for us both it seemed as though we were killing each other slowly. Who bruises someone they love? Who try's to hurt them with wicked words? Im so done been a wicked person but we both had a bad mental state and combined it was not pretty. I lived with him and his family in not the most comfortable environment this could also spark our disagreements. Working full time jobs, missing each other , no trust in each other , assumptions , we even thought it was acceptable to lay our hands on one another at some points which is never ok on either part male or female. So with all this been said what the hell was a girl to do I felt I couldn't go home to my mother as it had been to long I was kind of brainwashed id fantasise about the days I didn't have to stay at my partners family's house anymore. One day I just became exhausted the fighting became to much and I finally stopped provoking and reacting then we remembered we can talk to each other. So after about a week of exhaustion and finally getting along again I started not to feel myself even more we got drunk at a christmas party ( I had some time of work and got drunk every day since the 16th December until just after christmas to numb my issues ) but this time we both got drunk at the party and we started loving on each other again like we had before he made a silly comment about my belly and said I had a little him in there. Which we both just laughed off drunkly as I thought yeah impossible. This comment didnt leave my mind all night then when a still slightly drunk but a more sober me woke up that comment was the first thing on my mind. I asked him what the fuck he meant?! He said he was just drunk and playing with me. Then I started to think wait I havent been feeling right for awhile I put it down to just been sad. But something kind of clicked in me I felt sick and I turned to my partner and said omg you've gotta get me a test he looked puzzled but when I explained he went to the corner shop and came back with three tests. I was terrified not to lie , id been pregnant before when I was younger and that didn't end well as they couldn't find a heartbeat .. Pure dread came into my heart and pure fear I started to feel more sick and panicked than ever. What if I lost a baby again I already accepted the fact I couldn't carry nor could I get pregnant again after the damage left and the blood transfusions and all the struggles of the time before. I didn't even want to be a mother at all , or did I ? No not Atleast until I was like 30 or something id pushed all thoughts of ever been someones mother out of my head for a while as it was to painful. Ugh why me , why didn't we glove up why did it have to feel so good why why why and then to think I had been drinking and smoking. Shit. I stopped all these thoughts and quickly manned up and took all the tests to the bathroom. All positive. Shit. Id not long started a great new job though , I was really excelling and I dont wanna be a mother and surely history would repeat itself? Were the tests right? I cant even get pregnant can I? Ive been drinking so much and smoking, ive been so sad ive been getting into scraps with my partner how far gone was I? Had we scrapped when I was pregnant? Im trapped. So many thoughts I sat in the bathroom and just let out a deep breath. Im the strongest person I know lol or am I or do I just suppress shit and abuse substances to get over the way i felt ? Either way I felt strong I know im strong after everything id been through before in the past year let alone the past few years. Okay It is what it is man. Walked out the bathroom and handed my partner all the tests we looked at each other he widened his eyes then he smiled real hard probably the most he'd smiled at me in a long time, he was happy but he was worried because he to lost his baby when I did before. We both lost the baby. It was ours and now we were faced with that feeling once again omg were pregnant wtf to do?! Not to mention We found out on new years eve!! So all of our plans cancelled. Man if this wasnt the time for me to get drunk and high I dont know what was. So we left it for a few days. We agreed to rebuild ourselves and rebuild our friendship and then out relationship. We obviously still loved and cared for each other but we had to make a pact no more toxic mess not around my baby no way no how. No More drinking for me I told myself I also stopped smoking cigarettes I was the moodiest id been in a month or so withdrawal symptoms really aint the one. I found it extremely hard to stop getting high though truthfully that had been my addiction and coping mechanism for years I felt even more lost wondering what the fuck I was gonna do without getting high everyday after work after a busy day after just having to wake up. Truly exhausting. Still only me and my partner knew our secret whilst I struggled to come to terms with it. At work I had the worst morning sickness ever I wont post to much about this but my job included me having to be really hands on and alert at all times It was getting real tough. I needed to tell someone. I told my manager their reaction wasn't really what I needed I guess they felt I was deliberately(damn it took spell check along time to figure out wtf I was just tryna spell) deliberately ruining their business. Great. And more exhaustion and more morning sickness. I need my mom Yo. The next day I went to my moms house and just came right out with everything she was shocked , happy , scared because of last time of course. My darling mom man I missed her she reacted just how Id wanted her to by getting my shits together telling me I had to make decisions from now and ultimately booking me a private paid scan for the next evening to check everything was ok. Work on this day was the worst all I could think about was whether I was gonna see that little heartbeat or whether it would have stopped like last time, like last time like last time all i kept thinking was like last time. Jesus get me the fuck out of here It was going slow though because I was clock watching. Finally it was time to leave i was outta there in no time I felt so sick driving to the scan place we picked up my partner It was just us three I could tell my mom and him were terrified to but they were just tryna be happy and make me laugh but i literally couldn't even speak I just felt so weird , silence please until we get this over with. So we arrive at the place and I swear my feet stopped working and my legs like I couldn't even get out of the car, mom helped me. Okay this is it. There was like a ten minute wait for the sonographer it felt more like ten fucking hours. Id zoned anyway I didnt know what anyone was saying and if they were talking to me I wasnt listening, finally they called me. We got into the scan room and oh my life Ive never experienced fear like it I personally thought I was fearless nothing scared me but this did. My mom literally had to lift me onto the bed and pull up my top for the scan and then explain to the sonographer Id had a bad experience in the past. My partner looked at me and smiled but I could see past his smile I could tell he was fucking shit scared just like me so he came and held my hand she rubbed the cold jelly on my stomach and began to look around Id covered my eyes by this point cos in my head I thought well at least this time if theres no heartbeat I wouldn't have to see it. I heard people talking my mom , the sonographer , some other woman in the back supervising I just wasnt listening to what they were saying my mom stood up and took my hands from my eyes and said its okay look! I looked and there was my beautiful little bean with the strongest heartbeat ive ever saw the sonographer turned to me and said your only eight weeks so not far gone at all but they have a real strong heartbeat and so far everything looks fine. I just froze and started sobbing. My little bean I couldn't believe it they printed us some scan pictures and I prized myself up of their bed and we went back to my moms house on the way back I was sick all over myself in the car in my new tracksuit that was really something. A part of me just couldn't believe I had a living thing inside of me. Wow got to my moms house cleaned up and ate some food and we talked and we made decisions and I told her I didn't wanna be a mother and she told me really it was tough and I should of thought about it before I didnt use protection. Lol typical thanks mom though I needed that. So I should have been relaxed cos there was a heartbeat but all I kept thinking about was would they even make it another week inside me I really didnt believe I was capable of bringing another life into this world. She dropped us back to my partners families house were we lived and my partner told his family they were happy for us his mother especially. We sat in our bedroom and I just cried on him for abit then he made a spliff and I had a few drags ( I know its bad but try not to judge me ) id read marijuana could help with sickness . Yeah anything to make it sound better. Fast forward a little bit to a week or so and I had a couple of appointments at the hospital due to what had happened before they wanted to double check me and see if I was okay. My manager was not at all happy about how many appointments I was having constantly making sly remarks and comments giving me the silent treatment telling me I was causing them to have to find cover. My initial thoughts whatever trevor I'm still here still working still trying my best your the least of my worries and just ignored them and looked forward to going to bed as the exhaustion was unreal Id never felt a tiredness like it honestly. Fatigue. Back at my partners house him and his mother had had a few disagreements lately and then one night it got really bad and a lot of harsh things were said and eventually she told him he had till the end of the week to get out. What ! I was shocked where was I gonna go ? All pregnant and shit clearly I had to go with him I hadnt left his side at the best of times never mind staying somewhere he'd been kicked out of. Weird shit I made the split second decision and told him lets leave now we grabbed a few bits we needed for the next couple days and left right there and then. Where we gonna go !? My partner asked I didnt even know I just knew I didnt wanna stay there any longer. I called my mom and briefly explained she didnt have a clue what I was talking about it was half eleven at night and everyone had work early in the morning she just said yes then we turned up at her house at midnight , a couple of lost puppies like hey. She just made sure we were okay we'd ate and we had somewhere to sleep with all her blankets and pillows. Fast forward a little bit I really wanted to move into our own place so I started saving over half my wages for the next two months and just stacking up buying things for the place we found , he was saving to , we'd saved more money then than in our whole lives , I mean it seemed real easy I wasnt buying bottles of alcohol all the time I wasnt buying cigarettes I wasnt buying weed no clothes cos I figured id just grow out of them soon anyway so my money was literally untouched so saving and buying household goods was all me for the next few weeks. I wasnt happy but I was at peace. We viewed a flat and I knew it was the one man I just didnt think we stood a chance as it was in a posh area and quite expensive and we were not posh and you know how landlords would stereotype a young black couple so I really began to give up hope of finding somewhere. But then they called and told us the place was all ours and we could come and collect the keys in two weeks I was so happy we were happy, it felt like things were finally gonna go right. The day before I was due to move in my manager dismissed me unfairly due to pregnancy discrimination. It didn't come as much of a shock because of all the shit id put up with them since telling them I was pregnant, but I couldnt believe people could actually do this stuff to people. It was disgusting I was so mad and now breaking down because I didnt even know if id be able to afford to live in our beautiful new home. All the stuff we'd brought and I didnt wanna be a young mom living in at my mothers house it was all just to much once again I manned up and realised I had alot of savings and still had another wage to come my way and some unpaid holiday so I was going to be okay until that ran out. Of course my partner works hard and he could pay everything but that is not something I wanted either so I made sure to even out my savings to last until the summer by then id be receiving maternity pay anyway. I was terrified for the 12 week scan as alot of pregnancies dont make it to the 2nd trimester all I could think about was what I had lost before I just couldn't accept anything good would happen for me so once again sick and nervous I went to my next scan and there it was again a beautiful little heartbeat , so strong and the way they were wiggling about in me on the scan I still just could not believe it more scan photos were given and I left feeling abit happier once again still filled with terror and worry. I began to wonder whether or not id ever be able to enjoy been pregnant and if it was even worth it worth putting on the fake smiles every day worth looking at my changing body going from been super underweight hardly , controlled eating basically not eating at all - when I was sad cos It was the only thing I felt I had control over , to having no choice but to eat constantly all the time even through all the horrible morning sickness that FYI doesnt just fucking occur in the mornings. Ugh. Whatever. I have no choice for me pregnancy felt horrible its a really weird experience I didn't understand how women skipped about with their big bellies all happy and excited cos I was not happy or excited I loved my baby of course but It filled me with dread to think I could be growing them but never get to meet them again I just was not prepared for this at all and Im twenty years old. Isnt that old enough? Hell no. But theres nothing I can do. Fast forward 16 weeks pregnant and received news you can pay for a private scan to reveal the gender. So basically to put it blunt I thought everytime I had another scan I wouldnt see the babies heartbeat sounds paranoid and ridiculous and surely after three scans id calm down . Nope it got worse for me. So of course I wanted to find out the gender but for me it was just another way to see if the baby was still alive in me. The day of my gender scan I actually had an appointment with the midwife to listen to the heartbeat. So i went into that terrified as well my midwife knew how scared I was and dealt with me really nicely she eased me into it and then I heard my beautiful baby's heartbeat for the first time. Oh my God it was shocking I felt breathless I was listening to my baby's heartbeat. (Ive just noticed excuse my poor grammar throughout I never liked school lol) but that heartbeat the most special thing to me its all I could think about. Then in the evening when it came to my private scan I was still terrified at finding their heartbeat even though id heard it literally a few hours before! It was then that I realised I actually had a real problem. But whatever suppressed that again and readied myself for what they were saying in the scan. So I brought along my sister my dad my mom my partner and my bestfriend as you were paying you could have five people in the room lol. This if your highly nervous I wouldnt recommend they were all so excited and happy I just couldnt figure out how they were so excited and happy whilst I was miserable and terrified. So on the scan table the cold jelly again and then the sonographer started to feel around I covered my eyes again of course like I did every scan then got the all clear that there was a heartbeat then started to watch it was beautiful I couldnt get over the fact a little human was inside my belly so weird so magical wow. The sonographer asked so do you want to know the sex my family were all like wooo yeahh I didnt say anything just half heartedly smiled all of a sudden then sonographer told me its a girl!!! Oh my God. I had a little girl growing inside me a mini me. I sobbed abit again. Unreal my very own little daughter. So overwhelming that I actually started to feel really upset thats another thing about been pregnant these raging hormones noone warns you about this stuff I swear. So we were having a little girl (something my partner had said all along) and I was still not happy. I started to feel really selfish and bad. I explained I felt lonely I dont know how when I wasn't alone but it was just not a great feeling at all I really needed help I started to act irrationally and like an emotional wreck I definitely needed to accept some help so a week or so later I spoke up and was referred to a mental health midwife. Which to me sounded dramatic as fuck. But cos id struggled with mental health before it was something they had recommended anyway but stubborn old me didn't take the help. But now it was official I was dealing with antenatal depression like a constant feeling of impending doom I just couldn't be happy ever again could I? At Least not until my daughter was in my arms. I dont do talking or taking sad pills I couldn't drink I couldn't get high or control my eating like before not to mention I couldnt just have the maddest sex session either as I was scared that would harm my baby to. Ugh. I couldn't do nothing man because I was pregnant so my stress went straight to my head all everyone kept saying was dont stress you'll stress out the baby. Like really thank fuck you just said that never thought of that before. I literally couldnt listen to people and their stupid comments I just tried to accept they were trying to help and whatever they were saying was in my best interest. Okay Now this is were my story so far gets real fucked up. Ive been trying to think how to word this since before even starting to write this. Writing it in my head over and over but this is were it gets really personal to me. We're almost up to the current point in my story so far to. So 19 weeks pregnant I am terrified (surprise) for my next scan next week, its the 20 week scan it looks at your baby and your inside properly in abit more detail and sees if things are forming the way they should with the baby and with the umbilical cord, the placenta, the sack of fluid baby is in just all sorts of things. So of course im fearing the worst noone gets why I always fear the worst but I did it before been pregnant anyway so now im pregnant it just made it that bit worse for me. Im showing now by the way got a right little belly going on lol my moms started with a baby box , little socks her first teddy , a couple outfits she even managed to convince me to buy my little girl something I brought her some girly dinosaur baby grows as Id never saw dinosaurs for girls before and I loved it. So this beautiful little baby girl box. I looked through now and again and I wouldnt say I got used to been pregnant but I started to feel her little movements her little swimming and butterfly movements in my tummy so as much as Id tried to stay detached incase of any loss I was attatched whether I liked it or not. My baby girl. I pictured what shed look like , where id take her , what me and my partner would be like with a baby and what a daddy he would be. Holidays with her and just the rest of my life with her. My saviour she'd even made me able to forgive my partner and to care a lot less about the silly little things in life when I think about it she's the only reason Id found a way to want to live again, like she'd given me a purpose like I didnt need to have my eating disorders anymore or get high or get drunk all I needed was to feel her move. I dreamed about kissing and feeling her skin for the first time, I just couldnt believe id been given the opportunity from God to bring one of his angels onto the earth. Had me really in my feelings and thats not me at all. Crazy shit. Anyway back to the scan. Im 21 weeks and 3 days now and its the day of my scan to see if everything's okay me and my partner are nervous of course but im with my mom and him again and there telling me everything's gonna be fine and I just need to chill out. So we get into the scan I cover my eyes once again and then the doctor tells me theres a heartbeat , a strong heartbeat. so I open my eyes and start to look his scanning all over explaining what he can see so far then he goes quiet and starts to scan the same place over and over again, her heart. So I just get a feeling somethings wrong. A single tear comes out my eye and I just lye on the bed waiting for him to say something to give me some information , finally he says im just going to get a second opinion. Thanks for all that info Dr fucking who. My mom and my partners faces they look so sad , so sad for me for them for us all man we dont understand whats going on were just waiting for them to say something more. Two doctors come in the room and scan her heart again shes wriggling all over the place at this point sucking her thumb , waving her arms. I just cant look at the screen anymore I cant bring myself to look at her. The doctor says im so sorry but we suspect she has hypo plastic left heart syndrome, well fuck me. From when he said im so sorry I just couldnt breathe again I didnt even know what the fuck he meant but im scared and im upset and im desperate. My partner looks so sad to. I just feel so bad I just want to apoligize to everyone I just dont understand why I cant do this one thing a women's supposed to do. So the doctor gives us some notes and refers us to a fetal medicine scanner to confirm the diagnosis. Basically the left side of her heart hadn't formed properly he told us what to look at online and what to read etc. I just couldnt believe it. I felt like a fool for ever believing something good could happen for me for us. So we left thinking we had nothing left. I had already started grieving and she wasnt even gone! I was grieving like she was though I just lost all hope. Reading up on the syndrome it means she will need open heart surgery at just a few hours old, then another open heart surgery at around 7 months if she was even to make it through the first op. Then another open heart surgery at 2/3 years old. Then eventually a heart transplant as her heart will never work like a normal heart and it can never be fixed. Well ill be damned. I spent the next few days until the fetal medicine scan breaking down in the shower and staying in bed anything I was doing included bed I didnt wanna leave bed I didnt wanna talk to anyone I was defeated. I couldn't bring myself to go into the room with that damn baby box. Fetal medicine scan day. Which are more skilled doctors sonographers that specify in looking at problems and confirming them. By this point id given up been scared before the scan as I was scared everyday. Waking up was like hearing the diagnosis all over again because as soon as I opened my eyes I would remember. So the doctors scanned and it was confirmed hypoplastic left heart syndrome my poor baby girl thinking of everything shes gonna have to deal with. How long would I know her? If I got to know her at all would she even survive the first op? Second? Third? What the fuck. Why me? Why me and my baby Im a good person Ive done a few bad things but ive dealt with more bad Jesus why me ? Did I really not deserve a break I just couldnt believe my luck. They offered me three options. Termination. Which I considered for a little while as I believed it would hurt less if I lost her now than loosing her when Id met her. Is it better to have loved and lost or to have lost and never loved? What kind of shitty statement is that I dont even know what to think anymore. I decide if shes still fighting then I have to fight with her I cant just give up hope for my baby girl. So cancel out that option. Next. They offer the three stages of the operations but thats not including any complications and operations to fix anything else that goes wrong oh and also my baby has to weigh over 5 pounds to be able to have these operations anyway and cant have any chromosomal issues such as down syndrome or Edwards syndrome then they really cant operate at all and nature just has to take its way. And the last option was compassionate care so when my baby's born they help us plan the funeral and give us extra support. To me all these options were fucked the fuck up and I just didnt want to have to choose any of them. We had like a week to make a decision until we met with the cardiologist who would explain my little girls problems in more depth as every baby is different of course and look in depth at her little heart. See if it was even possible to operate how much damage was actually done. Well fuck me. I seriously didnt even know this condition existed and neither did my family and friends. I couldn't help but just feel grief and defeat. But as long as my daughter kept fighting I knew that I was going to so we picked the second option deciding to go through with the operations if that was a possibility for her. Appointment over. I couldnt even bring myself to look at my stomach that night truth be told i couldn't even look at myself at all. I just felt like a failure If i couldn't do this what could I do? I thought about how my life will never be the same ever again as most babies take up to three months to leave the hospital if they even get to at all how much we'd have to be in the hospital for the rest of her life. Weve been dealt some real shit cards. Cant I just give her some of my heart? Cant my partner give some of his heart? We would give her anything she needed. Not possible. Ive tried to think of how to explain the next week to you guys but its impossible to put into words for me it felt like been in a box in the deepest point of the sea and seeing a random submarine in the distance but if you try to scream to get its attention you'd drown. Although that comparison is shitty because nothing could compare to the way I was feeling. Grief pure grief and heart break, I didnt know why God kept testing me but I also didnt want to question him. Cardiologist appointment arrived and in we went again to check over our baby. So her little heart is underdeveloped and the right side is doing everything for the left side. Everything else looks fine her growth is normal and her movements. The biggest problem though her heart. Now there are four severe things that could be wrong with her heart adding to her syndrome meaning she is unable to have the operation and she only had one of them. Her areola a small vaule to the heart was only 1mm big which will make it harder for the surgeons performing her operation. So it makes a high risk operation even more high risk. Then the cardiologist started coming at us with statistics and they sounded real shit , any hope I'd had left she knocked it the fuck out of me. Information overload I just couldnt believe what I was hearing still all I kept thinking about was how long we're going to know her for I mean we still dont know what were dealing with properly until shes here anyway all we know is she has a 25/75 chance of survival with the op . And a even lower chance without the op. So much to take in. We were told a charity named little hearts matter would get in touch with us and that we could go and visit parents or surviving babies after the op and then we would go and have a look at the children's hospital where our baby will be transported to straight after birth ( I wont even get to hold her until after the op ) blah blah blah just more words that hurt and I just wanted to get into bed. Left that appointment feeling worse than when we went in. I cried a hell of alot that night to in the shower were I felt I could just sit with the freezing cold water hitting me trying to wake me up out of this emotional daze I had dropped into. I went a walk and contemplated just jumping into the moving traffic so me and her could just be free together in a better place. No I refuse to sink. After that I realised most people my age could not put up with half the stuff I've been through hell people twice my age couldn't. I remembered I was super strong (more so than ever before) and that my daughter was just as strong as her mommy. The next day we spoke with the charity and now theres a lovely lady who calls me to see if were okay and how baby's doing. And I have more hope than ever I believe everything is going to be okay in the end and God only tests his strongest people. My baby girl is my will to live and she keeps me strong and she now kicks me real hard every single day her daddy feels and sees her kicks and so do my family and friends. She's so beautiful and strong im now 25 weeks and waiting on more scans I have to have one every two weeks and endless appointments monitoring her. Im a high risk pregnancy but I'm okay for the first time in a while and whenever I have a down day and cry a little my baby makes sure to kick me so I know she doesnt want her mommy to be sad. Dont get me wrong nothing is cured certainly my despair and broken heart for her broken heart, some days I feel like I can take on the world and anything it throws my way and other days I cant imagine loosing my little darling , it really hurts not knowing how long I may know her for. But I just have to accept life is an amazing gift no matter how short or long. And although I'm to young to be dealing with all this shit I'm making it my mission to deal with all of this shit just for my girl. And I hope to raise awareness on alot of issues raised in my post. Ill be writing more when the times right and thankyou for listening x https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=1700345300267324&id=1696783053956882 https://www.betterhelp.com/start/?utm_source=AdWords&utm_medium=Search_PPC_m&utm_term=mental+health+helpline_p&utm_content=41730113956&network=g&placement=&target=&matchtype=p&utm_campaign=384715930_mobile&ad_type=text&adposition=1t1&gclid=CK7R9-e03tMCFcy37QodO20LaA&gor=start-go&fv=d http://www.nhs.uk/Conditions/stress-anxiety-depression/Pages/mental-health-helplines.aspx https://www.nct.org.uk/pregnancy/antenatal-depression http://mensadviceline.org.uk https://www.womensaid.org.uk/information-support/helpline/ My story so far ! .. Stay tuned. #mentalhealth #awareness #littleheartsmatter #speak #useyourvoice #love #follow #strong #pleaseread #story
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