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#cant say im super happy with that decision either
loveiis · 10 days
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a bittersweet getaway || chris sturniolo
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chris sturniolo x reader
PART ONE OUT OF 6
SUMMARY: as seniors in high school, you and chris are sworn enemies. but graduating is still a big thing, so matt and nick want to invite you to going to hawaii with them for the summer. chris doesn’t seem too happy…
WARNINGS: swearing, suggestive thoughts/dialogue, fluffy, not proofread
A/N: hi so this is actually my first time starting a series so pls pls plsss don’t get mad if im not super active!! school is stressy!!!! love u pls enjoy <3 (also i will be putting lady killers II every time i make a chapter cuz i love that song so.)
2,598 words, 13,383 characters.
DAY 0: pilot
TODAY was the biggest day of my life. yet i still felt somehow empty. not in an emo way. just because graduating didn’t really do anything for me. all i thought about was what i was going to do after all of this was over, not focusing on the fact that i graduated.
i walked down the steps of the front doors, my gown and tassel flowing a bit from the wind. i mindlessly scrolled through tiktok with both airpods in my ears, with noise cancellation on. i hear mumbling near me, thinking it was just some girls blabbering about their dream job or something. i kept walking, feeling a tap on my shoulder. i took out both airpods and looked in the direction of the tapping. “girl did you hear me?” my best friend, nick said. “sorry, no. what’s up?” i replied, staring at him. nick sighed dramatically and continued.
“me and my brothers are going to hawaii for a vacation. i wanted to extend an invite.” nick explained. i paused for a moment, almost immediately saying yes. “chris is going?” i raised my eyebrow. “yea?? you like him or something?” nick gave me a weird look. i was taken aback, knowing damn well it was the complete opposite. “no! hell no. never. i hate him, thats why i asked.” i rolled my eyes at him. “well, he’s coming. you either show up or you shut up, hun.” nick smiled at me with a mean girls type of look before walking away.
goddamn that attitude.
i stood there, watching nick enter his car as i thought of what my answer would be. i cant possibly not want to go just because of a boy right? thats pathetic. i have to go. plus, i have nothing to do or anything planned for the summer. or the summer after that. i placed my airpods in my case and started walking towards my car.
opening my door, i get in the car and close it behind me. sitting in the drivers seat, i take off my cap and throw it into my backseats. i adjusted my sitting position and started the car, plugging my phone into the aux cord. i played “spare time” by eric bellinger.
rolling down the window, i pulled out of my parking spot and drove straight to my house. the cool wind blowing in my hair, my tie bracelets looking pretty in the sunlight from my windshield. my nice moment of peace being interrupted by a phone call from chris. god, what could he possibly want right now? i answer the call, my music turning off automatically.
“can you come here.” he says over the phone. “well hello to you too chris! im doing great thanks.” i respond sarcastically, feeling weird about the fact he just demanded something, not asked. “bro. does it sound like im playing? come here.” he hung up the phone. okaaay, what the fuck?? so now chris wants to see me and for what? no fucking idea. i put my blinker on and turn towards the triplet’s house.
-
i knock on the door, anticipating a response. instead of chris, nick opens the door. “have you finally come to make a decision?” nick crosses his arms. “no, i came here for chris.” i say, walking past him not realizing how it sounded. “knew you liked him!” nick called to me, closing the door. i shook my head violently at him and barged into chris’ room.
“jesus christ! do you knock?” chris jumped at the sound of his door slamming against the wall. “no. what do you want?” i crossed my arms, leaning against his wall. he sighed. “don’t come to hawaii with us. please. i dont want to deal with you.” he said. “so this wasnt something you could tell me on the phone??” i almost yelled. “i wanted to see your face when i said it.” he smirked. i opened my mouth, about to say something, but closed it again only realizing it would make him happy to see me upset. you smiled sarcastically and walked away from him. “does that mean you’re not going?” he yelled, hearing his laughter. i walked out the front door and got in my car.
you know what? i am gonna go. just to make him mad. and i wont even tell him. i pulled out of the driveway and drove to my house. i decided to call nick to tell him. “hello? didn’t i just see you?” nick said. “yeah, i wanna tell you that im going.” i responded. “good because i already bought you a ticket about 3 weeks ago. we leave tomorrow, 6am. you sit up front i’ll be in the back with chris. be ready!” nick hung up the phone. of course nick already bought me a ticket. he knew id go anyways. i let out a sigh as i turned my music back on and rolled my window down again, enjoying my peace.
-
i locked my car, going up the steps to my front door, unlocking it. i opened the door and closed it behind me, taking off my shoes and my gown, hanging the gown up in the hallway closet. i sighed, plopping down on the couch. i laid my head on the couch arm while i kicked up my feet to relax. i opened my phone to 12 missed messages from chris.
“are you not going?”
“bro answer”
“pls tell me ur not going”
“BRO”
“NICK JUST TOLD ME YOURE GOING”
“FUCK YOU”
“I LITERALLY TOLD YOU NOT TO.”
“YOU DONT FUCKING LISTEN”
“ANSWER THE PHONEEEE”
“WHY IS NICK SO HAPPY?”
“IM ACTUALLY GOING TO KILL YOU”
“i fucking hate you.”
i laughed, looking at his stupid texts. i actually got a reaction out of him. this trip is definitely going to be fun. i put down my phone, laying on my side.
my eyes start to get drowsy, my brain becoming blank. i let my eyes shut, and fell into a deep sleep.
-
i woke up, the blanket that used to be on top of the couch now on top of me. my tank top strap was off of one arm and my one sock was lost in the couch somewhere. what the fuck? what time is it? i removed the blanket, sitting up and looking at my dark living room. i yawned, picking up my phone.
the brightness of my phone blinded me as i stared at the big numbers that read;
3:12
well shit. i only had 2 hours and 48 minutes to be packed and ready for the triplets to pick me up. i immediately got up to take a shower, brush my teeth and wash my face. i got dressed in a ribbed longsleeve crop top and ripped shorts. i had about a little over an hour to pack. i packed quickly making sure i had everything. but i didn’t even know how long we were staying. i called up nick. “hello?” nicks raspy voice rang over the phone.
“how many days are we even staying?” i yawned again. “like 5 days. matt please give me your suitcase jesus christ.” i hear nick getting mad at matt for something over the phone. “okay, well thanks. see you soon then.” i say. “okay, bye.” nick hangs up the phone. so i removed the 7th outfit and let there be 6 just in case of an emergency. i zipped up my suitcase and made my way to the kitchen to have some cereal. i scrolled through tiktok while eating, taking my time since ive pretty much been rushing even though i was making good time. after about 30 minutes, i heard a honk in front of my house. i got up quickly and placed my bowl and spoon in the sink, grabbing my suitcase and adjusting my jewelry.
i walked out the door, locking my door behind me. matt got out of the car, looking tired as hell. he opened the trunk. i walked towards him, smiling a bit. “you seem tired.” i let out a breathy laugh sarcastically. “do i now?” he said sarcastically and smiled at me. “hand me your suitcase, i got it.” he reached his hand out for the handle of my suitcase. i felt bad. he was so tired. “no it’s fine, i got it. you’re tired.” i shook my head. “please. nicks going to kill me if i dont.” he rubs his right eye. i looked down, handing him my suitcase. why would nick kill him? i gave him a thank you before getting in the backseat, because apparently nick was sitting in the front. i realized i was going to have to sit next to chris.
“nick, weren’t you going to sit back here?” i tilt my head. nick turns back to look at me. “yeah, but this kid was being stupid so i decided to sit up here. sorry.” he replied, sternly. i looked at chris, his hair flopping forwards as he stares at his phone with his airpods in. i look away when i see matt get in the drivers seat. “okay. next stop, the airport.” matt said as he shifted into reverse. he put his arm around the back of nicks seat and looked out the rear window as he backed out, i stared at his features. matt stared at me then. “something wrong?” he sat back in his seat, twirling the steering wheel. “no im okay.” i snap back to reality, shaking my head vigorously.
i put in my airpods as matt drove away from my home, listening to my favorite playlist.
(time skip)
we made it to the airport, everyone stretching when they got out the car. i put my airpods back into the case, shutting the car door. matt took out everyone’s suitcase and handed it to them. “thanks again matt.” i said again. “you dont gotta thank me, thank nick. he said he wants you to have a great experience.” he laughed a bit, grabbing his own suitcase. he closed the trunk and started walking with chris and nick. i followed after.
-
security was so shit. it took forever for them to get the line of people done and chris was seriously losing his patience like a little baby. “finally that shitshow is over.” chris rolled his eyes. “get over it chris it happens. you act like you’ve never been in a fucking airport before.” i snapped back. “when do you ever shut the fuck up?” he almost started to yell. “okay children calm the fuck down. lets go before we miss the flight.” nick interfered. i calmed down but i saw chris roll his eyes again. we continued walking until we reached our gate. we made it to boarding right on time so we got in the line and showed the lady each of our tickets.
only little did i know, i had to sit next to chris while nick and matt sat in the next isle. i called window seat obviously. i put in my airpods again and looked out the window, listening to music, trying to ignore the fact that i had to sit next to chris fucking sturniolo.
-
maybe about 3 hours into the flight, i fell asleep, my head against the window of the plane. chris woke me up, because the flight attendant was offering snacks. my mind blank, i asked for pretzels and a cup of apple juice. “you’re such a kid. apple juice? didn’t you graduate yesterday?” chris ate out of his tiny bag of snack mix while smiling. “chris, please. shut the fuck up. for once in your life.” i was tired and he just pissed me off even more. i had to pee anyways, maybe i’d get a break from him. “i have to pee, get up.” i say. “no. just go.” he shook his head. i sighed. “fine.” i get up from my seat, squeezing my way past him, my back facing him. when i get out the tight situation i make headway for the bathroom.
-
i come out the bathroom, feeling better, making my way towards the seat. only to find chris gone and my snacks sitting on my tray. “where’s chris?” i asked matt, not sure why i was concerned. “he went to the other bathroom the other way.” matt pointed his thumb backwards. i didn’t even know there was another bathroom here. i sat back in my seat, putting the airpods that were still in my ears back in their case and started eating the snacks. chris came back about 2 minutes later, breathing heavy like he ran a marathon.
“are you okay?” i look at him with a weird face. “yep. why?” he responded lowly. “because you sound like you just ran a marathon.” i looked into his eyes, trying to find what he was hiding. “idk. im fine.” he said dryly, putting his airpods in. oookaay. i put my head back on the seat and closed my eyes once again.
-
“god, jesus get off of me!” i woke up to chris pushing my head. i lifted it. “whats wrong?” i said quietly and drowsily, rubbing my eye. “your head was on my shoulder. and its time to go.” he said, grabbing his suitcase from the top storage. “sorry.” i said, my mind still hazy, i didn’t really realize i said sorry to chris. i never say sorry to him. chris sighed and took out my suitcase too. something i never thought he’d do. it doesn’t matter. i stretched and got up out of the seat. me and chris followed behind matt and nick off of the plane and into the airport.
i was so hungry, they only fed us once with a snack and drink, i needed something to eat. “im hungry.” i whined. “well nobody is going to drop everything for you! go get something to eat!” nick snapped. well he must be in a bad mood from the flight or something. “what do you want?” chris chimed in. “what?” i raise my eyebrow. “to eat?” he took out his wallet. “chris i got it. don’t try to be a gentleman.” i rolled my eyes. what is up with him? wanting to pay for my food is crazy. he sighed and walked towards dunkin, wallet still in hand. how did he know i wanted dunkin?
“okay is this your doing nick?” i look at nick. “no, i swear to you i only talked to matt.” he replied quickly. matt side eyed him, upset that he yelled at him at 6 in the morning. chris comes back around a minute later, a glazed donut in a bag and a small iced tea in hand. “okay, how do you know my dunkin order?” i gave him a look. “does that really fucking matter? stop acting like a brat and take it.” he said sternly. i took the food and gave him a questioning ‘thanks?’
(time skip again sorry 😭)
we made it to the airbnb that nick and matt helped pay for, everyone sighing and placing their stuff in the rooms. i claimed my room, chris coming in behind me. “this is my room dummy.” i crossed my arms. “there’s two beds you can share fatty.” he pushed past me. no way he just called me fat. “chris go share with your brothers!” i yelled at him, watching him place his suitcase on the bed by the big window. “can’t. they each want their own bed and there’s two beds per room so, gotta share with you.” he shrugged. great. what could possibly go worse?
okaaay im ending this here only because i started this at 8pm and now its 12am. i am tired. next part tomorrow?? tbc 😝 (p.s. this was so bad im sorry 🙁)
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ginger-coffey · 3 years
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some drawings of strawberries i never got round to finishing
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free-pool-trash · 3 years
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happiness - peter maximoff
yay a new peter fic <3 i was feeling a little unmotivated for a few days (since our boy wasn’t in episode 8 at all :/) but im back 😎 although im back in school so i might be on and off for a while 😩✋🏻
!!!it’s not a songfic those lyrics at the start are just my inspo!!!
word count: 5k <3 😳
warnings: maybe swearing but i dont think so i cant remember, peter being sad, angst, but mostly fluff, WandaVision spoilers maybe??? I pretty much made up this plot so idk, endgame spoilers, reader was an avenger, kissing but it’s not graphic😽 probably some mistakes yk how it is
feedback is appreciated <3
tagging: @enchantedcruelsummer (should i make a peter maximoff taglist? let me know and I’ll do it)
masterlist
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haunted by the look in my eyes that would’ve loved you for a lifetime
leave it all behind
& there is happiness
Loneliness had always been something that plagued him. That and a plethora of other negative emotions.
There wasn’t a day that went by where Peter Maximoff wasn’t made to feel like a loser. Admittedly, he’d never held himself to a high standard, he grew up thinking that he’d never fit in anywhere and eventually that thought mutated into a lifestyle as he began isolating himself from the world around him, either far too good or heartbreakingly not enough to be a part of that crowd.
He liked spending time with himself. Nobody else knew him the way he knew him, and still, he found nothing but an overwhelming hollow space where his deepest most important hopes, aspirations, dreams and self discoveries should have resided.
Peter had always put this feeling of exile down to the fact that he was a mutant, it was the most likely explanation, right?
It was only when he’d decided to join the X-Men that he finally came to the conclusion that maybe the rest of the world wasn’t the problem, nor was his mutation the problem, but that he himself was the problem. For even in a school full of people exactly like him he was still the same loser that he was in his mother’s basement.
And he was under no illusions that that was exactly what his teammates saw in him; nothing. No potential. Just a space holder to bring the numbers up.
Super speed was incredible. That’s how Peter acknowledged jobs well done, he praised his speed but never himself. He just saved Charles and Erik from a room full of armed guards? No that wasn’t him, that was simply his speed. He saved an entire mansion full of people from a potentially fatal explosion? Nothing special, Kurt probably could’ve done the same.
Forget all of the good deeds and saved lives because the bottom line of it all, to him at least, was that all he was good for was cheeky one liners and hopeless kleptomania.
His life took a turn for the worse when he found himself being mind controlled in an alternate universe. And even then, he was playing the part of someone that wasn’t him, the thought humbled him, reconnected him to his roots and reintroduced him to his life long philosophy that he’d never be anything more than a social pariah. Not even an alternate reality could accept him for who he was. There wasn’t a warm welcome and despite not knowing what was going on, the definition of “imposter” or the weirder, “recast”, still shot to kill.
He settled on the notion that he was an inter dimensional waste of space. At least in WestView he could be blissfully ignorant, let the real him be drowned mercilessly in favour of being an integral part of someone’s life- to feel important, even if it wasn’t real.
When WestView fell apart he was completely lost. In every sense of the word. In a new world with no way home and as it turned out, nobody was looking for him. Although he didn’t expect anyone to care, it still stung that nobody did. He always hoped that one day Erik would step up as a father figure for him, this; getting kidnapped and smuggled into a different dimension, seemed like the perfect moment for that epic father son moment, but it wouldn’t surprise Peter if his father has yet to notice his disappearance.
But then, seemingly out of nowhere, he came into contact with a beacon of hope. A guiding star that might possibly lead him to an existence consisting of something other than misery and self loathing.
It offered him a choice; return to being the self proclaimed loser he was known as or start fresh as someone new and mysterious, with first impressions yet to be made and conclusions about him yet to be drawn. Peter had known himself to be rash in the past, when it came to making decisions he had the tendency to act impulsively, never putting too much thought into how his decisions would affect his life in the long term. The choice before him now is no different, he knew exactly what he wanted going forward, however selfish the choice may have been, the second he realised it was an option his heart was set on it.
That previously mentioned beacon of hope arrived to him in the form of a girl, in the form of you. An ex-avenger and close friend of Wanda’s, you were hired by S.W.O.R.D to help them clean up the more ‘sensitive’ fallout that the fall of WestView brought about. Obviously, they were sticking you- the only other avenger with magik- on babysitting and rehabilitation rather than letting you go after your best friend who had gone completely off the rails. Having said that though, you didn’t want anyone else handling him.
You hadn’t watched WandaVision, nor were you even aware that any of it was going on until it had reached a boiling point and you got a call from Monica Rambeau, she’d begged you to come and wait on the edge of town while she went in and act as her eyes on the outside along with Jimmy Woo.
That’s where you stayed until the hex broke down.
As soon as the barrier came down the base you manned was overrun by an armada of terribly confused and distressed citizens, Monica and Wanda were not among them but in their places stumbled in Darcy and the man playing the role of Pietro.
Jimmy appointed himself to Darcy, who in all honesty seemed relatively unscathed by the situation while you made a beeline for the dirty blonde charading as your former, dead teammate.
Peter was, to put it simply, completely enthralled by you as soon as you’d strolled over to him and in the moment he’d put his almost magnetic attraction to you down to the fact that you were the first friendly face he’d seen upon breaking free of Agatha’s possession.
But one thing in particular struck him; you’d asked him his name. You hadn’t immediately assumed him to be some knock off Pietro, as everyone else had. You acknowledged that he had his own personal identity and despite how often he caught himself hating the person he was, he found that when it was torn away from him that he wanted it back. The simple question you posed gave him the opportunity to regain his identity.
“Peter. My name is Peter.” He answered you, almost unsure of himself and you found your interest in the man piqued even further.
He remembered with perfect clarity the way you’d offered him a grin, tilted your hand, extended your hand and said, “Well it’s nice to meet you, Peter. Come on, I’ll be your babysitter for the next while.” There was something about the way you’d laughed after saying the words and the slight, yet unmistakable, glint of mischief in your eyes that had him captivated from the get go.
With you came a whirlwind of new emotions. After only a few weeks of knowing you, Peter noticed he wasn’t as lonely as he had been back home. He didn’t hate himself half as much either, he wasn’t entirely free of self deprovative tendencies and maybe he never would be, but undoubtedly, he likes himself more in this world than he ever had in his last. He thanked you and your determination to make him “a functioning member of society” for that.
It didn’t feel belittling, the way you helped him. You hadn’t dragged him to your favourite mall every weekend just to taunt him about how he couldn’t stop himself from stealing something. Even the very first time, when he’d sped away from you and returned within a second adoring a pair of freshly stolen sunglasses. Your only reaction had been to laugh and casually place your hands on both sides of his face.
“At least remember to take the tag off next time, speedy.” You’d muttered, subtly pulling the tacky stickers off the arms of his shades. No, you weren’t dragging him sight seeing or forcing him to help you go clothes shopping because you thought he was a loser who needed reforming you were doing it because you were a true friend who wanted him to succeed.
The pair of you seemed like two peas in a pod. Which to be fair, you were. Peter Maximoff intrigued you in every sense of the word. He was new, quite literally other worldly, he was kind, he was funny, he was perfectly mischievous and completely wonderful.
What caught your eye the most was the way he held himself, as if he wasn’t entirely comfortable in his own skin. It became apparent to you that he lacked confidence with the phrases he usually tacked onto the ends of his sentences. When you’d invite him to hang out in the beginning his response would always be something along the lines of, “Sure. If you want me to.” But the excitable puppy dog eyes told you that he was dying for someone to want him to tag along some place.
There was a certain understanding between you. You were both more than accustomed with the harrowing feeling of being alone and even though you’d never exactly voiced those thoughts with each other, you couldn’t deny that his was a spirit kindred to your own and he felt it too.
Since the Avengers has disbanded, one of your best friends, Natasha, was dead and your other best friend, Wanda, was gone completely off the rails and the people chasing her wouldn’t let you anywhere near her or even attempt to help pull her out of her darkness. You were being kept as a wildcard in case they needed her taken down. Peter was no stranger to the feeling of being cast aside and so he quickly responded to your frustrations, and in doing so, forced himself out of his comfort zone to be there for you. To his complete shock though, you’d been so appreciative of his efforts.
You never failed to thank him for the little things he did for you, always complimenting his mutation when he’d use it and giving him the recognition he never received at home. The friendship he formed with you was so… two sided, again, something he wasn’t accustomed to before. It didn’t involve him giving everything he had to offer and receiving nothing in return, you matched his energy meticulously and never left him hanging.
In a series of firsts, he didn’t wonder whether or not you genuinely liked him, never feeling the need or want to question it as you’d left him with no reason to doubt.
As he walked around the mall with you now, his mind brought his attention back to the question you’d asked him rather casually a few nights ago. You were both lounging on your couch, watching some ridiculous reality show (a favourite of yours and Peter’s) when you’d turned your head to look at him, a thoughtful look on your face. “Do you think when S.W.O.R.D figures the technology out to crack into other realities, you’ll go back to yours?”
The question had taken him aback for a second, in all honesty, he hadn’t thought about going home, not when he was with you at least and considering he’d become your roommate about three weeks after he got out of WestView, the thought of returning to his old life had barely crossed his mind.
Being an ex-Avenger you were fairly well off, you lived alone in a two bedroom apartment in New York that you’d bought to be closer to Stark tower. Peter had nowhere to go and aside from having a spare room to offer you’d also been sort of lost in the current of the busy city with everyone you once loved in the area either dead, on the run or busy elsewhere.
While the question hadn’t crossed Peter’s mind, it had crossed yours on several occasions. He’d been staying with you for six months and the moment you realised that he was becoming one of the most important people in your life, the thought of him leaving you too weighed on your mind but at the end of the day you wanted him to feel happy. He deserved to feel happy and if going back to his reality brought him that happiness then you’d support him.
“Dunno,” he’d replied, turning to face you, chucking a handful of popcorn at you when you looked incredulous at his response, “To be honest I haven’t really thought about it, m’way too busy babysitting you anyway.” He joked, effortlessly dodging the few pieces of popcorn you attempted to throw at him.
For the last few nights, the question haunted him, but it wasn’t just the question that was bothering him. You were at the forefront of his mind as he replayed the past six months of his life which also happened to be the best six months of his life. WestView put him through hell but coming out the other side of it and meeting you felt like heaven.
He weighed up the pros and cons of returning to his native timeline. The cons: he’d have to leave you behind, he’d go back to being the loser who nobody took seriously, his talents would be downplayed and disregarded and he’d inevitably end up revisiting his lifestyle of solitude. Then there was the pros: he’d get to reunite with his pac man machine. He couldn’t manage to think up anything else.
If he stayed he’d have everything he ever wanted and needed. You’d be there and he knew you always would be, besides he couldn’t leave you knowing that you needed him. If he left who would wake you up when you had night terrors about the catastrophe that your reality was still recovering from? There would be nobody there to comfort you when you woke up from the nightmares, reliving the deaths of Natasha, Tony or Vision and the experience of being snapped out of existence? If he wasn’t there to make you laugh when you were about to cry then who would be? In his heart of hearts he knew you had a huge support system at your disposal, he’d met most of them. Even though he was well aware that Sam visited you as often as he could, that Bucky wrote you letters on a monthly basis and sometimes tagged along with Sam on his visits, that Stephen Strange appeared in your apartment whenever the urge struck him, that the literal god of thunder invited you out for beer whenever he was visiting Earth, that the little spider-kid, also named Peter, swung by your apartment at least once a week to tell you all about school and his good deeds. Despite knowing all of this and knowing all of these people loved you dearly, Peter wanted to be your main source of support, he didn’t want to be someone who came and went, who’d love you then leave you. He wanted to be with you through anything and everything and the feeling that you’d love him for a lifetime had him satisfied with the decision he was about to make.
If leaving his old life meant he could stay here, with you, and experience happiness for more than a fleeting moment then he’d simply; leave it all behind.
“I’ve been thinking about what you asked me the other night.” He spoke through a mouthful of curly fries. You were sitting in the food court of the mall when he decided to let you in on his desire to stay with you indefinitely.
You raised your eyebrow, “You? Putting thought into an answer? Peter, I think I’m starting to become a bad influence on you.” You told him teasingly, taking a long sip of your drink as he rolled his eyes humorously.
“You’re a terrible influence which is exactly why I’ve decided to stay here and put you on the straight and narrow.” The glee you felt at his statement was undeniable, your eyes lit up and your lips curled upwards.
“You’re staying? Really staying?” Your smile was contagious, Peter’s face now painted with a wide grin as he nodded his head.
In a moment of weakness he frantically added, “Y’know only if you want me to though. If you don’t that’s completely cool.” He rushed through the words, feeling more embarrassed when the fond look on your face never faded.
“Of course I want you to stay. You mean a lot to me.” You reassured him, a gentle smile on your lips as you reached across the metal table, intertwining your fingers with his.
Peter squeezed your hand gratefully, holding it in his grasp securely and allowing his smile to return to his face, “I know. You mean a lot to me too.” It was somewhat of an understatement, he was starting to understand that you didn’t just mean a lot, but that you meant everything.
His resolution lifted a huge weight off your shoulders that you wouldn’t be losing yet another best friend. You were glad he’d be with you when everything blew over with Wanda, the two of them definitely had the potential to develop a beautiful sibling relationship and they both deserved that. Of course, Peter would never replace Pietro and having known them both it was obvious just how different the two men were, the only thing they had in common being their powers and last name. Still, he and Wanda would still be able to work on it. He didn’t hate her after WestView and you knew Wanda well enough to know that she was kind hearted and she’d be more than willing to give him a chance. When she eventually comes back to her senses, that it.
As the months went on, life with you and Peter seemed to only get better. You never stopped laughing, your nightmares died down and Peter had taken on a whole new lease of life. Yourself and Peter were the perfect example of meeting the right person at the right time, you balanced each other out and accentuated the other’s good qualities.
Peter could now say with complete confidence that he was happy and what’s more is that he was finally sure that he was making someone happy.
Up until nearly eleven months of living together your relationship had been purely platonic, save for the constant flirting but flirtation pretty much ran in yours and Peter’s blood. Peter wasn’t going to lie to himself, he’d fallen for you the second you’d peeled the security tags off his stolen sunglasses.
You, on the other hand, had been fighting with yourself because yes, you love Peter but you couldn’t have told him when there was the possibility he’d eventually leave and now so much time has passed and you’ve got such a good thing going you didn’t have it in you to ruin it.
However, all of that changed when your original Maximoff best friend came knocking on your door.
Wanda was on the run. She’d caused an amazing amount of chaos but Stephen Strange and S.W.O.R.D were hot on her trail and now she needed a place to lay low with the twins. She figured there was no place more reliable to go than to the always open arms of her best friend, who conveniently had a divinity for earth magik and could muster up a protective barrier without raising suspicions. And that’s exactly where she found herself; outside your door.
You’d been chasing Peter around the apartment when you heard the knock on the door. Peter was on the opposite end of the kitchen to you, using the bar as a shield from you. “You better get that.”
“Oh you’d like that wouldn’t you?” You glared as you spoke, it was his own fault really. What sort of idiot jumpscares a witch while she’s mid-meditation? He’d frightened you so badly you accidentally blasted a ball of your signature green energy and ruined your favourite couch throw pillow. When you were ready to pounce on the scared speedster the knocks sounded again, more frantic this time.
With one last glare towards Peter you stomped towards the door. Your anger melted away completely when you saw her. Her hood was up and she looked completely exhausted, two small hooded little boys by her side.
“Wanda…” You breathed out, relief flooding your system at the sight of her alive. She didn’t get a chance to speak before your arms were pulling her against you tightly, hugging her as if your life depended on it. Wanda returned in your embrace, allowing herself to relax for the first time in nearly a year, she sniffled against your shoulder, holding back tears as she realised how much she’d truly missed you.
Billy and Tommy watched in confusion as their mother cried into your shoulder. They didn’t know who you were, all their mother had told them was that they were going somewhere safe.
It was the yell of one of the boys that caused you and Wanda to separate, “Uncle P!” With that you felt a familiar rush of air across your leg but instead of Peter appearing one of the kids was gone.
You shared a perplexed look with Wanda, although your confusion was for different reasons.
“Hey hell raisers!” Peter responded, catching the mini speedster who all but threw himself at him barely regaining his balance before the other child had flung himself into the hug.
“Wanda? Those two… are they...?” You started, at a loss for words Wanda cut you off quietly, her tone as disbelieving as yours.
“My children? Yes. Is that…?” You nodded your head numbly, anticipating the end of her question.
“Your fake brother? Yeah.” Quickly, you realised you and a wanted woman catching up with the door wide open wasn’t ideal and you ushered Wanda inside, shutting the door when she walked in.
“Hey.” Peter greeted her simply, as if he hadn’t been used as a meat puppet in her altered reality. It wasn’t in his nature to hold any grudges.
“Hi?” Wanda replied, her voice still twinged with confusion.
“Peter, will you keep an eye on the kids for a bit? Wanda and I have some catching up to do.” You asked him with a nervous laugh, just thankful that Wanda was too tired to argue with your suggestion.
Peter ruffled the boys’ hair and gave you a grin, “Only if you stop trying to kill me.”
You rolled your eyes as you began to lead Wanda into your bedroom, “You’re on probation, jerk.” You called over your shoulder.
Once you were securely in your bedroom, the door locked and sitting comfortably you fixed Wanda with an amused look, “I’d ask you what’s new but I’m not sure I even wanna know.”
Wanda gave you a sad smile while she shook her head, “No, you probably don’t. I will tell you tomorrow, I don’t want to get into it tonight. I’m so tired.” She admitted, her voice overcome with sadness.
“I’ll pump up the air mattress and you and the boys can sleep in here for however long you need. I’d offer you the spare room but that’s where Peter’s been staying and I don’t think empty food containers are the kind of decor you’d be into.” Wanda nodded, squeezing your hand gratefully.
“So his name is Peter?” She asked, curious about the man Agatha had used to trick her in WestView.
You nodded in confirmation, “Yeah. Peter Maximoff, actually.”
Wanda’s brows came to a furrow at that, “Maximoff? So he’s a relation?”
“Yes and no. Peter is from a different reality but he’s still a Maximoff and he’s got super speed. So, and this is just my theory, while you’re not directly related he could still be your brother- if you wanted him to.” You explained, as gently as you could, not trying to push her too far but to nudge the idea in her direction.
Wanda, to your surprise, didn't seem to hate the suggestion, “What is he like?”
A genuine smile made it onto your face then, as you shot into your description of your roommate, “He’s caring, funny, a little bit of a kleptomaniac but he’s working on it. He’s understanding and moronically selfless, moronic in the sense that he doesn’t even realise he’s being selfless. Huge pain in the ass too.” Wanda had a soft smile on her face by the time you’d finished.
“You like him.” Was all she said and you let out a laugh in disbelief, standing up and opening the door.
“Go grab a shower. I’ll have Peter blow up the air mattress while I go introduce myself to my god sons.”
“I thought you’d at least wait until I actually asked you.” Wanda laughed as you walked out of the room.
Things moved fairly quickly after that. As promised you introduced yourself to Billy and Tommy as their god mother, which they seemed more than thrilled about and you assumed that excitement had to do with whatever description of you Peter had given them. Wanda and the twins were all cleaned and fed and had all but collapsed into bed, foregoing the air mattress and huddling together in your double bed instead.
“Where are you sleeping, mother Teresa?” Peter teased as he noticed your eyes drooping where you stood.
“On the couch probably. Or the air mattress.” You mumbled, cutting yourself off with a yawn.
Peter, unimpressed with your options, scoffed, “No way. Come on, you can bunk with me.”
Much like Wanda, you were too tired to argue and you let Peter pull you to his, surprisingly clean, room by the hand.
You both crawled into the bed, lying close together despite the amount of empty space on the mattress.
“How are you feeling about all of this?” Your soft voice broke through the silence and Peter turned his head to look at you.
“About Wanda?” You nodded your head, watching him intently as he rolled onto his side, facing you more comfortably.
Peter shrugged lightly, “I’m feeling ok. Just glad the twins still see me as their cool uncle.” You let out a small laugh at his response.
“Wanda was asking about you. Seemed interested in getting to know the real you.” You informed him, your heartwarming as you watched a hopeful look fall across his face.
A lull settled over the room once again and Peter caught himself staring at you. His eyes drifted over every visible part of you, reminding him of most of the points on his pros list for staying in your universe; your eyes, your lashes, your nose, your lips, you.
“What’re you thinking about?” The sound of your tired voice pulled him out of his thoughts and ultimately pushed him to bite the bullet and tell you how he’s feeling. With you curled up beside him, in his bed, fighting sleep just to stay in his company for as long as you could; he knew there would be no better time.
“Just about how happy I am to be here with you.” He answered you honestly, the butterflies in both of your stomachs fluttering in sync at his words.
You trailed a hand under the duvet and onto the bedsheets between your bodies, feeling around until you found his hand and gently intertwined your fingers. “I’m happy you decided to stay.”
“What you’ve all gone through in this timeline sucks- don’t get me wrong-“ Peter started sincerely, scooting closer to you and dropping his head back down on the edge of your pillow, leaving the pair of you practically nose to nose as he went on.
“And I hate that Wanda had to go through so much… but I’m really glad that it led me to you.” Peter swore in that moment, right after the confession left his mouth, that he could die right now and be completely content knowing that you now knew how he felt.
His heart stopped, and he thought that maybe he was about to die, when you gave him the softest, sweetest smile he’d ever been on the receiving end of and whispered, “I feel the same.”
Time moved in slow motion as he felt you moving your intertwined hands towards your lips, your lips pressed gently against the back of Peter’s hand before you brought them to rest against your chest.
It was a fact to say that Peter Maximoff had never felt intimacy quite like this before. But, experiencing it now, with you, led him to wonder how he’d ever survived without it. He wasn’t sure whether it was natural to crave more, especially when the affection you were showing him was so gentle, but he didn’t care as he let the impulsive side of him take over.
Not sparing another word, Peter closed the small distance between your lips and his. His free hand cupped your jaw while yours wasted no time in getting tangled in his silver hair.
His lips moved softly and surprisingly slowly over yours and he savoured the feeling of your hand holding his while your other got lost in his hair, your body pressed up against him, the way your jaw moved against his palm as you reciprocated the movement of his lips and the taste of your lips, promising himself he’d never let the memory slip from his mind for as long as he lived.
With complete clarity, Peter could say he had felt true, genuine happiness and he had no doubt in his mind that there was absolutely nothing Charles, Hank, Scott or anyone else from his original timeline could say to make him leave this happiness behind. Because in the process of forgetting his old life, he couldn’t deny that he has undoubtedly found himself in the position of a man who had so much more to live for.
623 notes · View notes
dog-teeth · 3 years
Note
is there anything you wish you had known before starting T? are there any effects that you dislike? sorry if this is too personal, i'm just trying to make sure i'm making a good decision. i'm agender but i want to present more masc but i'm scared that i'll end up hating the effects of T even though there are some things that i really really want from it. also, i love your art!
no worries im honestly fine with talking about almost all transition/gender related stuff! im gonna talk (p non-explicitly) about sex and body stuff so i’ll put this under the cut
there aren’t any effects i dislike. when i started there were things that i was very nervous for because i thought i would hate them but ended up loving them. i prefer almost everything i experience on hrt, or i don’t care about it, so for example i LOVE my voice now & i love the way T makes me feel emotionally (both physiologically and psychologically), but i don’t care about having facial hair because i always shave it but it’s not that much of a hassle and sometimes stubble is cute. i don’t care for the body hair either bc i was already basically as hairy as a cis man pre-T, i even liked my old leg hair better because the texture was less coarse. the only thing i like better not on T is sexual sensations, but honestly i dont have sex so it doesn’t matter lol. i was v scared for bottom growth and was certain i would hate it but it actually rules i love it (i don’t love that i need like three times as much lube now tho cuz ur ability to naturally lubricate goes way down) also this was one of the most uncomfortable changes at first cuz it makes the clit very tender and sensitive and it will rub against your underwear and be really uncomfy with friction, so make sure u have soft underwear and loose pants. sorry for talking about my genitalia but tbh there is nowhere near enough information about trans bodies and its one of the least discussed aspects of hrt.
however, i was not always this content with taking T! it was a rocky start! there’s nothing that bothers me now, but when i was first starting, a lot bothered me. i was SO sweaty for NO reason, my voice HONKED like a third of the time i opened my mouth, i was VERY ANGRY very quickly, and i was so so hungry!!! snacking forever!! all of these things mellowed out over the first few months, i’m back to not sweating very much and being able to speak like a human person and my anger is actually significantly more manageable than it was pre-T because it comes and goes easily which means i no longer fester deep frustration and anger all the time. i think my appetite leveled out but it’s still higher than before, i gained a couple pounds but it wasn’t a lot.
i don’t want to pressure or sway anyones decision to take hrt, but i would say that your body and mind are so very capable of adapting to new things & even if you end up not liking some parts of hrt you will be able to deal with them and move on, and most of the things that are nerve-wracking end up being fine. its super super scary to try taking hrt since so much is permanent changes to your body. but you can always take a low dose to make the changes happen slower, and like i said you get used to things way easier than you think you will.
i was really really really scared and uncertain when i started T, but i’m so glad i made the jump to do it! i could never have imagined how much it would improve my life! there were so many things i was terrified of - doing irreparable “damage” to my body, regretting it, being read as male, certain specific physical effects, etc. i also didn’t know anybody irl who took T, just my beautiful lovely trans woman friend who started E years ago while we were friends, so seeing her go through the process inspired me a lot. we r both so sexy now like we were sexy before but honestly hrt has made us unstoppable & i love it for us. i definitely couldn’t have done it without her support. i’m getting off track, my point was that i didn’t know anybody on T so i couldn’t see firsthand what it was like, i was basically my own experiment, and it was so scary. but eventually i reached the mindset of “i’m so fucking miserable and something needs to change and i’m not 100% certain it’s this but i need to try because i can’t spend the rest of my life wondering about it and if i do end up hating it i’ll just fucking deal with it from there” i would def recommend being more certain than i was but i do think theres a lot about hrt you just wont know how youll react to until it happens. above all my fears, i just wanted it, and all my fears were very surface-level (what if i hate my body [i already hate my body] what if i hate how people percieve me [i already hate how people percieve me] what if it makes me miserable [i’m already miserable] what if i regret taking it [what if i regret not taking it or i miss out on an opportunity to be happy] )
i cant tell you if T is the right choice for you, but i can tell you that i also had fears and uncertainties before starting, and that if you do end up hating it you’ll be able to adapt.
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muwur · 4 years
Text
snapchat headcanons
✧ hc’s ✧ for using snapchat w ur boi toi ft. the pretty setter squad
❧ gn reader
✎ 3.1k words
a/n: kinda a combo of how they use sc and the kinds of snaps they send you! along w wat u send them, and uh... dating stuf n shenanigans? texting/snapping habits? my fantasies? IDEK ANYMORE EOFHEFJ
this was born from the recesses of my mind , which desired nothing mor than snapchats from suga , us sending cute selfies , others bein dumb n chaotic , no context videos , n him snapping me photos of some mangoes on sale he said he’ll buy for me DXX it’s too late for me now
doing research on hq bois and surfing thru sc features (im just now realizing theres quite a bit?? im hoping i address most of them at some point lolol) instead of real life tings aHHhhhHAHA
requests: open! will be working on a suga one i got, dw, requester!
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sugawara
✧ sends good morning and good night snaps
✧ so he’s rlly good at keeping streaks, probs has the longest ones (one of them being y’alls streak)
✧ posts tidbits of volleyball practice on his story every once in a while
✧ snaps you pics of his sleeping teammates when they’re coming back to school after a long day of matches , adding a single ‘❤️’ as a caption
✧ he will also create colorful masterpieces on all of them
✧ gives daichi a santa beard, tanaka a squiggly stache (i imagine it to look like spongebob n patrick’s seaweed ones now that were mEN), n kageyama sum angry brows,,, wait he already has them lolol u good der kags
✧ posts a picture of you when you’re hanging out, captioning it: “🥰“
✧ has conversations with you purely via snaps
✧ ranges from casual chats and checking up on u to crackwhoring ( ** indicates the photo, while the “” quotes indicate the caption, all snaps are italicized, otherwise its regular dialogue)
✧ suga: *peace sign* “hey sweetheart, how r u?”
✧ you: *pics of homework* “ahh, drowning in school ;-; i cant wait for this week to be over fghjkl”
✧ suga: *close up with :o on his face* “let’s study together tmrw!”
✧ or
✧ suga: *complete darkness* “its 3 am n i cant sleep”
✧ you: *the top half of your head, laying on a pillow* “ ;( aw babe. do u want me to send something to help u sleep?”
✧ suga: *still in darkness* “y u still up?? go sleep. n 🥺 yes pls”
✧ you: *snaps pics of feet* “that’ll be 50 bucks, pay up” 
✧ suga: *darkness remains* “can we make a trade instead? i promise to make it worth ;)”
✧ ok now u BOTH cant sleep (im sry my crackheading be acting up around 2am eeryday, i stan a mischievous suga--)
✧ video chats (in the darkness lol) instead until you both pass out (im not in luv u r 😭)
✧ super down to take filtered selfies w you
✧ does all the silly ones with you (things like ’angry face’ or the frog one)
✧ but also rlly digs lookin cute with you using some heart crowns, y’all an aesthetic (n crakhead) duo fosho
✧ def subscribes to life hacks and tries them out himself, has a 50% success rate
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kageyama
✧ doesn’t rlly use snapchat too much
✧ but when he does
✧ will either send you a picture to indicate he’s at volleyball practice (wow wat a sexi lookin gym floor)
✧ or some random picture of whatever he’s doing at the moment (*drinking milk*)
✧ this is mostly in order to save streaks
✧ he’s so bad at streaks
✧ “why does it matter?? what’s the point of sending just black screens or whatever’s in front of you at the moment??”
✧ can’t keep a consistent streak for more than 3 days and also doesn’t care (until hinata challenges him to see who can have the longer one)
✧ when you send him videos of him playing, he really focuses on them to try to improve his technique. asks you to send those vids to him (assuming u saved them, which u did)
✧ but when you look over his shoulder when he’s watching a video and give him some compliment (“i recorded at the perfect moment! that was a really good set, kageyama!”), he gets a bit flustered
✧ gets even more flustered but pretty happy whenever you post videos on your story showing karasuno winning some points with captions like:
✧ “footage of the legendary quick >.>” or “karasuno crows flyin high!” or “these bois make my heart 😭 im so proud”
✧ you WILL catch him off guard in photos, using filters that surrounds his head w/ emojis like 🥺💖🥰💘
✧ you also put these on your story (to his dismay)
✧ ppl comment on these mor than anything else (n for those who dont rlly kno kageyama, theyre kinda surprised to him like this)
✧ hinata snickers “hey kageyama you look pretty good here--”
✧ takes some selfies with you, mostly cuz you want them
✧ saves them after u send them over (n secretly cherishes them)
✧ occasionally watches his subscriptions, they’ll usually involve sports, mostly volleyball (who woulda guessed)
✧ you use his bitmoji to test out random facial expressions you would never see him wear
✧ you: “can you smile and wink like this? act like you’re the obnoxious charming guy in a shojo.”
✧ will actually attempt, but it looks so bad that you die inside and he never wants to try again cuz of ur laughing outburst (you: “😭😭 bb im sorry i couldnt help it”)
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oikawa
✧ literally sends you anything and everything
✧ morning bathroom selfie to show off how good his hair came out that day, saying:
✧ “he has risen”
✧ or “i woke up like this”
✧ and my favorite, “you’re lucky you get this content for frEE”
✧ selfies with iwa, who just looks annoyed and exasperated at the camera
✧ sends you pics of his lunch and snacks (“bet u wish u had milk bread too”)
✧ always packs extra milk bread so he could convince you to stay at his practice after school--
✧ FILTERSS
✧ I CANNOT STRESS THIS ENUF
✧ will either use the filters that make him kayooottt (cute)
✧ loves the ones named ‘hearts,’ ‘soft,’ ‘peach,’ ‘butterfly cheeks,’ vsco filters LOL, etc
✧ uses ‘big mouth’ when he feelin a bit sASSY; also loves to use this one when he rants, it channels his inner valley girl
✧ sometimes he’ll be snacking or drinking something while he does so (“hey guys today im gonna eat these milk buns from my favorite bakery and this bomb orange juice and complain about this little kid who talked smack to me earlier and almost made me cry--”)
✧ takes cute selfies with you, is an aesthetic selfie king, puts them on his story to show off he’s hangin with you
✧ but on your story you only post the ones he looks bad in LOL
✧ has separate stories for his every need, some r private (and lucky you, ur included in all of them)
✧ titles them ‘mean things iwa said to me today,’ ‘ranting hotbox + mukbangs,’ ‘a day in the life of oikawa,’ ‘volleyball ����,’ ‘unpopular opinions,’ etc. 
✧ fitting room photoshoots lol
✧ “y/n, what do you think of this??” “and this?” “oOH WHAT ABOUT THIS??”
✧ ends up calling you through video chat so you can live critique his choices
✧ “oikawa, please no, i can’t be seen with you in public if you wear those--”
✧ also changes his bitmoji’s outfits from time to time, hopes you’ll notice, but you don’t LOL (oikawa: ;((((((( )
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kenma
✧ uses sc usually just to reply to messages ppl send him
✧ indifferent about streaks, but keeps a few with ppl he’s closer to
✧ mindlessly plays the snapchat games with you, finds some of them kinda cute
✧ you both made his bitmoji for him, dressing his up in the orange cat suit
✧ you also helped make kuroo’s and put his in the black cat suit to match--
✧ snaps you every time he gets a new game, starts playing it, and once he finishes
✧ started to post some gameplays and reviews on his sc story (might as well add them to sc since he was already on other social platforms), and ended up amassing a large following
✧ follows the tech and gaming stories on sc
✧ as well as the ones with cute animals--
✧ open to selfies with you, usually wears a calm expression and holds up a peace sign
✧ even occasionally sticks his tongue out
✧ his story is occasionally heavily bombarded with candids of him w/ pretty sc filters, all taken by you
✧ but of all the filters, you love using the clout glasses on him
✧ especially when he’s just minding his own business
✧ “kenma, in his tru habitat” when hes cocooned in a blanket
✧ “kenma, on his way to steal yo manz” while on his way to the bathroom
✧ “kenma, next iron chef. watch out gordon” as he’s cooking instant ramen
✧ “kenma” n das it
✧ but he thinks it meme-y so he lets you do whatever you want, kinda digs it
✧ you end up dedicating your snap story to memes of kenma and the nekoma volleyball team. ppl are in it for the shits n giggles n hot bois
✧ you later discover someone else did the same thing with their volleyball team filled with hot bois from shiratorizawa, and you befriend tendou and share funni internet tings
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akaashi
✧ 99% of his photos include either you or bokuto or both
✧ bokuto spams akaashi’s story and contact list with selfies and videos of himself using weird filters, often gets you to join him
✧ has several streaks, but will send something with more substance than a black screen or his bedroom window
✧ will usually involve smthng that just happened to him or smthing he saw, like:
✧ “a kind older lady offered me some apples in return for helping her”
-or:
✧ “how do i break the news to bokuto that the yaikniku place he’s been wanting to go to for the past week ,,, is closed today”
✧ o n let’s not leave out:
✧ “is it possible to conjure a ghost using a wooden spatula, ketchup, and a chalk drawn hexagram? bokuto’s been paranoid ever since he tried last night and i dont know what to tell him. seriously, help”
✧ looks through stories occasionally, comments whenever bokuto makes questionable decisions
✧ also comments on whatever you’ve posted. his words range from “you’re cute” to “why,” depending on the content
✧ ppl know when y’all are hanging out cuz he’ll post smthing to indicate he’s with you, usually it’s some candid and you’re not paying attention
✧ appreciation posts for you as well! esp if you got him something, like onigiri or his fav, Nanohana no Karashiae , for lunch! (akaashi: *snaps a pic of his food* “thank you y/n for feeding me”)
✧ prefers video calling over texting/snapping whenever possible tho
✧ occasionally reminisces thru his sc memories
✧ enjoys the flashback feature and will send them to you and bokuto (cuz they’re about y’all anyway lolol)
✧ also has secretly saved a bunch of selfies of himself, consists of him trying out a lot of the filters (he feelin himself)
✧ you, one day, looking thru his phone and discovering them: “akaashi, you’re so pretty wtf”
✧ akaashi: “...”
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koganegawa
✧ sends you selfies of him before practice
✧ during breaks
✧ and after practice, usually makes a comment about how it went for him that day like:
✧  “i hit a decent toss today and futakuchi actually complimented me!”
✧ that, or:
✧ “i got yelled at 17 times today 😢😩”
✧ has quite a few streaks, his longest ones being with you and hinata
✧ def uses filters
✧ tries out every funny one he finds and sends you videos
✧ “look y/n im an aaaaAALlliiEEENnnNNN oo oo hoo hhhooOOh”
✧ “now im a chicky nuggy!!” (chicken nugget)
✧ also enjoys the doodle feature
✧ but he uses the filter with the clout glasses unironically--
✧ usually when smth good happens to him and he feels happy and/or cool about it
✧ “just beat the boss in this game on my 69th try B)”
✧ “kogane, that’s--”
✧ plays sc games with you and thinks bitmojis r cool
✧ kinda sad he cant find a hair option that matches him tho lolol rip
✧ you: “you hair’s just,,, unique,,,”
✧ subscribed to anything sports and fitness, as well as pop culture so he can stay in the loop
✧ also watches everyone else’s stories, pointing out whenever he sees smthing cool and/or interesting
✧ “woahh, karasuno’s at nationals right now! i wish we could’ve won, but next year for sure!!”
✧ you encourage him at all his games, hyping him up irl and online
✧ “koganegawa: best setter 😍!!”
✧ luckily you didnt record the parts he completely messed up LOL
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semi
✧ before going out with you, snaps you a pic of his casual outfit like:
✧ semi: “does this look ok”
✧ you: “babe you look great, tendou was just messing with you”
✧ will make unwanted appearances on tendou’s snap and complains to you about them
✧ “i didnt consent to being part of his meme page” and
✧ “okay, but he didn’t only have to share all the moments i messed up--”
✧ also indifferent about streaks but will do them
✧ sometimes sends snaps/streaks indicating he’s practicing his music
✧ when you see these you usually ask him to send you vids or if you can come over n watch
✧ initially is a bit shy about it but he loves what he does and you and knows you’re genuinely interested and supportive so he agrees
✧ secretly rlly enjoys having you as his personal audience
✧ lowkey into asmr, like the soap cutting shit as well as chewing crunchy things
✧ also watches food porn and clips of mukbangs, then can’t resist going on youtube and watching the whole thing
✧  “y/n, can we try this, it looks so good--”
✧ will also often watch oikawa’s stories, especially his ‘ranting hotbox + mukbangs,’ and makes comments about him being an idiot
✧  “this kid he’s talking about is a savage”
✧ but admits they’re quite entertaining
✧ just looks serious in all the selfies you take with him
✧ you: “can you look like you’re enjoying yourself?”
✧ semi: “i look cooler like this tho”
✧ sc memories filled with shenanigans from you and the volleyball team, doodles, and mirror selfies with him experimenting diff looks (you: “tendou, you got him way too concerned about this”)
✧ also enjoys showing off he’s with you, taking a short video of you when you hang out
✧ you: “semi, i look bad right now”
✧ semi: “but you can never look bad”
✧ you: “🥺 bb”
✧ viewers: “aw”
✧ shiratorizawa: “can he be this nice with us LOL”
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shirabu
✧ his main mode of communication with you is mostly through the regular messaging app, so he doesn’t use sc too much
✧ also doesn’t care for streaks and is bad at keeping them
✧ will answer to you or his senpais rather soon tho
✧ but lets all his other notifications pile up a bit before finally going thru them
✧ goes through the snaps he receives really fast, spending like 2 seconds each to look at them cuz aint nobody got time for dat
✧ doesn’t even rlly open goshiki’s LOL
✧ you have fun using filters on him and taking videos while he’s just doing his own thing peacefully like studying
✧ it takes him a second to notice and when he finally looks up, he just gives you an exasperated look
✧ cue you cracking up with laughter bc the filter finally shows up on his face
✧ his eyes and mouth are now on mike wazowski
✧ that, or his face becomes so disturbingly moRPhed like an alien
✧ caption: “ken-chan, my future medical man 😍”
✧ “y/n, please, this is like the 7th time in the last 20 minutes--”
✧ finally convinced him to take a study break and hang out with you
✧ which usually consists of snacking and light banter while you lay your head on his lap
✧ and scrolling through snapchat stories and showing him what everyone else is up to and cool things you’re subscribed to
✧ “loooook, dr. miami’s doing another butt job! is this the line of work you’re studying so hard for?”
✧ “no, it’s really not”
✧ is actually very soft with you and likes having the photos and vids for memories
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atsumu
✧ sends you snaps where his brother looks bad, captioning it:
✧ “this is evidence that im the hotter twin”
✧ likewise, osamu sends you snaps where atsumu looks even worse
✧ like, the mans passed out, looking rekt and open mouthed, drool seeping into his pillow
✧ osamu: “u still have time to break up with him”
✧ also lucky for you, atsumu also loves to take unflattering photos of you and send them to you randomly at like 2 am
✧ you: “nani tf when did you even take this??”
✧ usually posts a snap while he’s out somewhere like at a match, the gym, outside on a run, a party, or just hanging out with you or his frens
✧ however, makes sure you look good if you show up on his story cuz he wants to show you off
✧ doesn’t really care for streaks, but has a lott
✧ but also has a tON of unopened snaps
✧ is the type to send just a black screen n call it a day, or maybe spice it up by sending a pic of the sexi gym floor (a comeback) w his shoe in the corner
✧ will, however, consistently respond to you and kinda looks forward to ur snaps (secretly hopes you show ur face)
✧ but when you dont:
*in class*
✧ atsumu: *a smirk on his face* “your content’s kinda dry today” 
✧ you: *your sexi desk* “my nudez ain’t free, i demand compensation”
✧ atsumu: *grasped his chin in thought, but angled the cam up bc he needa hide his phone in class lolol* “what if i... take you out on a romantic excursion”
✧ you: * your face but with ‘sausage’ filter* “🥵🥵🥵🥵 yessir, what u want”
✧ rlly only wants to have pics of your face wat a closeted sOFTIE
✧ likes to have content on his flashbacks
✧ usually has other social media sources to keep up to date with things
✧ actually rlly digs using sc filters, mostly ones that’ll make him look like a queen
✧ captions a selfie of you two like: “me >>>>>>> y/n”
✧ but nearly everyone who comments on it is like: “i think you flipped the sign, bro 🤥”
✧ judges ppl who are into soap cutting asmr (you will never hear the end of it if you also like it)
a/n: sc kinda dying for me, my use went from suga to an atsumu to like nearly nonexistent LOL
also o gawd i already have ideas here n there for a pt 2 so stay tuned fjxnwfesd hope it takes me less long cuz this one took me fkin foreva LOL
idk y i made semi like mukbangs but i feel like he’d be rlly into them--
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citrongarde · 3 years
Note
wally pokemon for the ask game maybe !!
WALLY WALLY WALLY!!!!!!! he is very important...
favorite thing about them: his character development is good...like look he's become so much stronger since he left his hometown!!! im so proud of him!!! but also because i cant just choose one fave thing about him theres also his pokemon team AND his battle theme AND the spider lilies in his victory road battle bc im a sucker for characters with flower motifs AND the little in-game hints that he's been wanting to go on a pokemon journey for the longest time what with the globe with markers on unova & kalos and all the books on raising/battling pokemon covered in sticky notes in his room...its just that bit of flavor text in the game that can really flesh out a character.
least favorite thing about them: i honestly dont know if i have a least favorite thing abt him. maybe that they got rid of his gardevoir in oras and replaced it with a gallade??? like ik diantha already has a gardevoir & they wanted to give gallade a mega evo but...cmon theres nothing wrong with giving him a pkmn that isnt traditionally masculine!!!
favorite line: "N-nice to meet you! I'm Wally. My Pokémon and I are always moving forward together, little by little, day by day!" this is from pokemas & i dont play pokemas but I AM SO PROUD OF HIM
brOTP: i think that him and may are buddies!!! i think their friendship is really cool (at least with how i interpret may) bc in my head it kinds starts off with wally idolizing may/thinking she's like this super cool battling prodigy who never lets anything get in her way and he aspires to be like her but then as they get to know each other the cracks start to appear in may's 'nothing ever bothers me ever' facade and she opens up and admits to wally that she feels like she won't ever be good enough or move out of her father's shadow but wally's there to lend her some comfort and tell her that she is good enough and she is recognized as a force outside of her father and at the same time...he sees that she's just as vulnerable to self-doubt as him and that makes him feel more confident in himself, to see that the girl who he perceives as his hero is still just a kid who struggles with confidence issues just like him, the only difference being that she hides it under a veneer of "well yeah i'm great at battling & i never lose"...and they see themselves in the other and find solace in their shared journeys and experiences and end up ultimately making each other's lives better...wally's openness about his feelings and his doubt in himself motivates may to talk about her emotions instead of bottling them up because sometimes its best to break down your emotional walls and feel human, to experience some emotional catharsis, to take a break from playing the hero and just be, and may's willingness to move forward and keep pressing on despite her challenges pushes wally to keep going, to keep bettering himself, even if it's little by little because baby steps are still steps and theyll still get you to where you need to go. anyway sorry about the meta rambling theyre besties :))))
OTP: i dont ship wally with anyone because 1) he's literally a 10 year old and 2) i dont see him being paired with anyone even in future scenarios because i hc that later in life he comes out as aroace. romance really isnt his thing and it never will be
nOTP: this probably goes without saying but wally paired with any of the adults is disgusting. hes a goddamn kid don't be nasty.
random headcanon: genderqueer wally is a headcanon that is very dear to my heart...also i hc that hes a big fan of the hoenn rangers coexistence force (not as big of a fan as brendan though) and his favourite character is lilycove viridian!
unpopular opinion: wally was a good rival with a compelling character arc you guys are just mean and hate rivals that arent total jackasses. also im kinda upset that they got rid of his gardevoir in oras but i dont particularly mind gallade either
song(s) i associate with them: a mannequin adrift by the scary jokes and youth by glass animals! also the fortnite parody of american boy
favorite picture of them:
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it was a hard decision but...this official tcg art.....he's so happy and he give his ralts a pokeblock..... :)
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us-ugay · 2 years
Text
ok so besties was attempting 2 think more about the king amelia queen arthur AU n like what im running into is issues w making it unique enough to be entertaining without falling into the same storyline i see w us*uk cardverse stuff (which not 2 say its bad i have the opposite problem i love that sort of slap stick “””enemies””” to lovers “oh we get under each others skin so easily but only cuz we wanna bone” storyline)
so maybe i was thinking instead i try to lean more on amelia playing up the dumb blonde trope to hide the fact that shes actully v super calculating and trying to fake it till she makes it w being a commoner being suddenly thrust into the kingship? like not 2 get 2 philiophical n nerdy but while yeah, theres always a glimmer of true self in the false self and while amelia usually loves to be carefree and happy and not pay attention thts what she /wants/ to be as opposed to her more intellectual nature and to avoid any outright criticism of being a bad leader for shit shes done? well thats just what happens when you got a giggly lil bimbo on the throne its not because /amelia/ is bad at ruling teehee :-)
and thats not to say shes even a bad leader! i like to think amelias someone who can learn p quickly when thrown into the deep end so even if she plays off all her decisions as silly little whims, shes fairly good at the behind the scenes personal deliberations she puts into these things. the kingdom hasnt seemed to slip yet, so while people count her out as a good king, she’s definitely lasted longer than expected before driving everything to ruin.
but thats the thing right? since shes shielded herself from actual criticism through the ditz persona shes also shielded herself from genuine praise since everytime a move turns out good and avoids war/economic collapse/wtf ever, people both nobleman and commoner alike just think either it was just plain luck or people felt sorry for her or the advisors were working overtime to impliment her stupid ideas. amelia threw herself into the kingship because she knew shed be competing against centuries of former, blue blooded and educated kings, and shes rapidly burning herself out since she cant be open and genuine with anyone around her and shes becoming quite miserable. but being miserable doesnt mesh well with the identity she made, so she keeps quiet and masked up
then you have arthur. i already talked about how i think itd be interesting that arthur assumed he would become the king, since it was rather common for those born into the royalty to get the mark of the king. the king deals with all external issues and the king is the one that deals with foreign diplomacy, trade and war. he studied for /years/ to learn the intricacies of the other kingdoms and prepped and primed himself to take up the mantle.....
just for this unread ditzy little peasant to steal the position from him. it kills him because hes angry, so fucking angry that his life long assumption fell through and hes absolutely more qualified to take the kingship, but also at the end of the day he just assumed, so he’s also angry with himself. but goddamn it it doesnt stop him from seething with rage when this idiot new king just giggles and proclaims “oh well if theyre being mean to us we should just throw a big party to get them to like us teehee :-)” goddamn it, the only reason the king of hearts didnt outright declare war at the hearts/spades diplomatic ball and reception is because she was throwing herself at the king and queen of hearts the whole night. the spades kingdom has lost their damn place of authority and power in this world goddamit.
but also, the fates act for a reason right? he feels guilty for being angry when this was destiny the whole time. the queen takes care of the internal politics and relations with making a better life for the average citizen. he’s woefully unprepared for this role. he’s grown up in the castle his whole life and wouldn’t know the first thing about what a commoner would think. he is plagued with the nagging feeling that maybe the fates messed up. amelia would know what the common man thinks, and he would know how to deal with the foreign powers right? but he feels even more guilt since its blasphemous to even question the fates and destiny.
so hes torn between being so fucking angry and being so wrapped up in guilt that he cant even stand to look at amelia. yes, theyre “married” but only because thats whats required of them. no one expects the king and queen to be in love, and its only a marriage for figurative and political reasons. they keep their own separate wings of the palace, and he only goes to talk with her whenever its 100% necessary in order to secure something for the domestic political scene.
on a professional level, he maintains his standing and image of being the utmost professional. while of course he was mocked for losing the title of king to a commoner, he will be damned if hes not the best queen to serve the kingdom. he has the education and training to deal with the rival kingdoms, surely he can settle simple trade disputes between the rural areas and the cities. and sure, while he still doesnt know how to interact with the common folk, he is effecient and capable on paper and within the overarching economic stage.
no one needs to know just how goddamn upset he is about his title of queen outside of his most closest advisors. im sure yao is more than done with arthurs comments and questions about how the foreign relations are going, but arthurs so removed from all of that from the day to day he just needs to have someone telling him how bad the kingdom has fallen in the eyes of the world right?
anyways, backstory and build up aside, i really dont know where to go from here. of course theyre both on the precipice of cracking and something has to give so they can see what the other is actually about. but, idk man i dont necessarily want it to be some melodrama with like war or something but also the only way to get these eggs to open up is to crack them under pressure 🌚 so im sure we can figure out something 🤷🏼‍♀️ anyways, and as much as amelia is feeling the pressure to keep up appearances and be aloof, and as much as arthur is an angry jealous and vengeful little fucker, i also wanna make them actually have a reason to like each other since if i gonna be doing a boy/girl story i dont wanna fall into the same tired ass “boy and girl hate each other 🤨 oh whoops they now love each other with no build up because this is how being hetero works :-)” trope. its not fun to read about and its not fun to think about :/ i mean im sure amelia, being amelia, is already stupid attractive so even if arthur is angry he still cant resist coping a look every once in a while and for arthur? i mean he was the crowned fucking prince and even if his eyebrows are goofy thick amelia still cant help but swoon a little whenever they interact cuz holy shit /thats the crowned prince/. itd be like having to live and work with a good looking and suave celebrity cuz even if they have an entirely professional and working relationship with you, holy shit i just gave business notes to fucking chr*s ev*ns or wtf ever
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agentsoftie · 4 years
Text
stitches and ditches
summary: y/n and spencer get in a fight. due to the fight y/n goes to the hospital where she gets taken. spencer has to find her before it’s to late
a/n: plot holes. plot holes everywhere. so i’m sorry for that, super sorry. also like i don’t really know how to write fight scene and stuff ig so sorry if it sucks. and i skipped like 3 classes for this, so don’t let it flop
warnings: fight, angry spencer, torture, a case, violent spencer (idrk what to call it) and whole lotta angst. i happy ending though! kinda, idrk
word count & pairing: spencer x (fem) reader & 4.1k
remember to like and reblog!!
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It all started the day he came home from work. This was one of the longest trips he’d been on so you decided to make him his favorite. Pumpkin Pie. And god knows how hard it is to make pie, but you did it anyways, for him. It wasn't too late when he got home but It wasn't too early either. More like the time right after dinner and just before dessert. You had just got the pie out of the oven when you heard the door open and someone walk in.
“Spencer! Finally you’re home! How are you!” You said while he put his bag away. He didn't turn to look at you yet which was kinda weird since the first thing he does when he gets home is kiss you right on the lips. “Fine,” He mumbled while sitting down at the table still not looking at you. “Spencer, come on what’s wrong?” You asked while grabbing his hands, but he immediately retracted. Which made sense because of who he was, but you’re not gonna admit that it didn't hurt. “Nothing Y/N.”
You knew that something was wrong, and it didn't take a profiler to see that. Everything about him was just off. “Come on, it's me. You can tell me anything.”
“Y/N.” Spencer said in a deep tone. You’d never heard him like this or seen in that sense. He was always happy to see you, to be with you. And were with his too. “Spencer no, come on. I can see that you’re clearly not fine. So come on, open up.”
“Y/N I said I’m fine!” You were appalled. He had never raised his voice at you, but it was bound to happen one day, you just. You just were shocked. “Spencer,” You said in a low voice completely contradicting his loud yell. “What!”
“Spencer calm down!” You say yelling at him. Although you realized that yelling at someone to calm down probably wasn't the best way to do it.
“No Y/N, you need to just stop and shut up!” Shut up. That’s the first time he’s ever told you to shut up. Infact, you think it's the first time he’s ever told anyone to shut up.
“Spencer just talk to me! It’s not that fucking hard!”
“No Y/N it is. It's tremendously hard and you just wouldn't understand.”
“Just tell me. And I'll see if I understand. But don't just gatekeep your emotions and feelings.”
“Y/N I said no! Why cant you listen to simple fucking directions! It’s not that fucking hard!” Each and every time he yelled at you, it's like your heart physically broke. And you could feel it breaking. But how do you tell him to stop? All you wanted was to know how he feels. Was that really so hard?
“Spencer why the hell are you acting like this! I understand that your job is hard but that doesn't mean that you can pour all your anger out on me! And if you are gonna do that, you can at least do the kind thing and share how you feel! And what's wrong! I mean, is that really so much to ask!”
“Oh really, that's how you wanna play this! You think this is just a little game don’t you!”
“Game Spencer! You think I play this as a game! Well this game is my life!” You were drop dead angered at this point. “What in the world gives you the right to act like this! Please, explain!” All he does is scoff at you. “I'm not joking Spencer! Why the hell are you acting like this! You've changed!”
“Oh I’ve changed! Y/N you've changed! You're always trying to kiss up my ass! I mean jesus! All you want is money! Like god!”
“Oh I want money! Spencer! I don't need your pathetic money! It may not have dawned on you since you couldn't bother to care, but I make a good amount of money. Yeah, you’re not the only one who paid for this place. So stop acting like you are.”
“Oh wow! Haha, you sick son of a,” He stopped immediately after realizing what exactly he was saying.
“Say it Spencer! Finish the goddamn sentence!”
“Y/N, you know I wont.” He says in a shift of tone. Still equally as affecting though.
“Why? Huh? You've already said so much, just wrap it up with a nice little red bow on top!”
“Y/N, stop,” He said, his tone getting more and more demeaning by the second.
“Do it Spencer! Do it!”
“Goddamn it Y/N I said stop!!” He yelled before throwing a glass at the wall behind you. You both immediately shut up, as trying to process what just had happened. Did he actually just try to hurt you? No, Spencer would never do that. Would he? You touched the back of your head and felt blood on your ear. You looked down at the blood and Spencer walked towards you but all you did was pull back from his touch.
“Don’t,” You mutter in fright. Putting your hands up against his chest, but not touching. His eyes looked at you as if they were trying to say something but just couldn't. You grabbed your purse, keys, phone, a coat, and slipped into some shoes. “Y/N, where are you going?”
“To the clinic or hospital or whichevers open right now. To get this checked out and stitched up.”
“Y/N, come on just stay here. I can stitch it up. I can do everything. Just dont leave. Im sorry, okay. I- I don't know why I did that. I promise I didn't mean too.” He begs and pleads but you just can't say with him tonight. No, not tonight. Tonight was too bad, tonight was a dent that was not going to be fixed.
“I just can't, Spencer. Okay, not tonight. There’s some pasta in the fridge, and I love you… I guess.” And with that you got in your car and left leaving Spencer to just sit in his own tears. He just sat at the table thinking of everything he did wrong. Everything that went wrong. And the worst part is that absolutely nothing wrong or bad happened at work today. He was just exhausted, that's all. And instead of telling his girlfriend, he started a fight. And he knew that you were in the right, for everything.
“Hi, Y/N. I’m Dr. Michael Gray. And it looks like something happened to your ear.” He says while standing at the door.
“Oh hi! Haha. And um… I thought that nurses were supposed to, you know, stitch up stitches.”
“Oh yeah, well they are. But you’re just so gorgeous I pass up the offer.”
“Oh, haha,” You say, not knowing how to feel. Although there was one thing you knew, and that was that this was uncomfortable as hell. “Well, I mean I do have a boyfriend.” You said just so he wouldn't try to make any moves.
“Oh well hey! Do you have any siblings or friends? I'm fine with absolutely anyone and everyone.” He says while disinfecting your ear and pulling the glass out.
“You’re Pan?” You ask to distract yourself from the pain.
“Yeah. You’re not gonna request another doctor now right?” He asks while carefully taking out the glass and putting it on a white napkin in front of you. That was a big piece.
“No, of course not!” You say in offence. “How could you ever think that.”
“It happens a lot with people. Especially the pretty ones. They automatically get turned off when I tell them I like everyone. I don't care about your gender, just your personality and how you treat me.”
“Oh well I would never. And it sucks that-that happens.”
“Yeah. Okay, so here comes the fun part. Hey, how did you even get these stitches? Or, why do you need them? Like how did you get to this point?” He says while slowly stitching up your ear.
“Ha, I get it. You’re just fine. And all of this is due to my boyfriend.” You say in pain.
“Wait,” He stops doing what he’s doing and just stands there. “Your boyfriend did this?”
“Yes. And before you say anything else, I am not in an abusive relationship. Okay, he just had a bad day and I guess I made it even worse. And trust me, he didn't mean to do it.” You say as he finishes stitching up your ear.
“Do you have a place to stay tonight?” He asks while pouring out a liquid into a small cup.
“No.”
“Then, come stay with me. At my place. And here drink this, it’ll help with the pain. A lot.”
He says while giving you a small cup filled with what looked like to be a crushed up powder poorly mixed in with water. Or whatever that the liquid was.
“Oh no. We just met.” You spoke before drinking it.
“You got anywhere better to stay? Plus my shift ends in 5 so it would be the most practical decision.”
You knew that it was wrong. After everything that Spencer had told you. But for some reason you still went. Even though you knew you should have gone back home to Spencer. And god knows what he was doing right now. But you couldn't just let your pride fall and go home. That would be pathetic. “You know what, okay! I mean what the hell! You seem nice and I’m not in the mood to face him again. Or at least for now.”
“Sweet!”
“Just one question… are you gonna kill me?” It was a stupid question to ask, you know. But after everything that Spencer and his family have been through. And with what happened to haley, you just couldn't help but to ask.
“No Y/N, I’m not gonna kill you. Now come on, let me get logged out and let's leave this place. Oh and Y/N, you can call me Michael.” He says while taking off his lab coat.
“Okay Michael.”
He brought you into his car and the drive to his place felt like hours. Although you really couldn't remember most of it since you passed out a quarter way through. The last thing you do remember is him putting his hand on your thigh and looking over at you with a smirk.
It had been 3 days. 3 days since you left to get your ear stitched up. 3 days since Spencer had last seen you. Since you had seen him. Or any of your friends. 3 days since you left your life. In those 3 days, Spencer completely lost himself. All of the books were on the floor. The bed was an absolute mess. And the kitchen was left just as it was the night it happened. He, himself, was a mess. His hair had not been brushed. He was still wearing the same clothes. And he’d been surviving on coffee and granola bars.
“Guys, we got a new case, come on.” Penelope chimes as they all do paper work. Spencer can’t help but look at his phone every 2 minutes just waiting for a text or call or any sign of life and/or love.
“What’s wrong pretty boy?” Derek asks.
“Yeah, you've been acting tense lately.” JJ adds.
“Nothing, It’s just Y/N,” He gruffs.
“Do I smell relationship problems,” Derek says jokingly.
“Derek!” JJ scoffs. “What's wrong Spence?”
“Nothing I just… Look, something happened, and now she’s not answering any of my text and calls, and I'm starting to get worried. That's really all there is.”
“Well what happened exactly? To you know, make her leave I guess.” JJ asks.
“Um, we had an argument. A pretty bad one. I came home after the case. The Checkersfeild one. And um, I was just tired. And instead of telling her that, I got super mad and said some things that I regret. And also did a thing I regret. A lot. And I would explain everything to her if she answered whenever I called or texted but she didn't.”
“How bad was the argument?” She asks again.
“Pretty bad. It was our first, but it was really bad. Just words coming and pouring out.”
“Spencer, how long have you and Y/N been dating?” Derek asks in shock at the fact that he just said ‘first argument’.
“2 and half years now.”
“And you two have never fought? What's this secret that you're keeping from me.”
“Well you know, we had our mutual disagreements. And sometimes we argued a little but it was small and it lasted for like an hour. And right after we would apologize and everything would be okay. It would all be fine.” Spencer said, his voice got longer and slower as the words went on.
“Wow, um… Spencer. You really love her, don't you.” Derek asked.
“Yeah. I really do, don't I.” Spencer says while walking into the briefing room.
As everyone sat down Derek couldn’t help but to keep looking at him. He knew that Spencer was hiding something, he just didn't know what. Or how to figure it out.
“Okay everyone this is Isabella Stines. The latest victim of our new unsub. Police are calling him The Ditcher. Since, as you can see, they leave the body in ditches after what looks like hours and hours of tourture. 5 other people were found too. First was Mindy Kindle, then Jake Johnson. Next, Rosé Hinnings, then we have Jennifer Gordon. And last, and hopefully least, Kross Noing. The ‘K’ is silent.” Penelope says while everyone looks down at the picture of the crime scenes and blood smeared across the screen.
“Do they have anything in common?” Spencer asks just before his phone starts ringing. He immediately picks it up even though the rule that Hotch made up states that you can't answer phones when you’re in the briefing room getting briefed for a new case. “Y/N.” Spencer asks, not knowing who this was since he didn't have enough time to look at the caller ID. “No, this is Sharron Richard, her boss. She hasn't shown up to work for these past days and we’re getting worried. She has a case coming up and this is a big one for her. We’ve been trying to contact her, but she’s not answering. So we called you since she left you as her backup or whatever you call it. So, have you seen or heard from her?” Sharron asks over the phone.
“Um no I- I haven't.” Spencer mutters through the phone so no one except Sharron could hear it. Although that failed miserably.
“Oh, okay. Well if you hear from her, or see her anytime soon. Please tell her to contact us.” And with that the phone was hung up.
“Pretty boy what was that?” Derek asks.
“Uh, nothing. Just a call from Y/N’s work. Apparently she’s been missing. Although you already knew that so…” Spencer said while looking down at his phone more time, then putting it away. Everyone just gave him this weird look of dissatisfaction.
“Okay anyway, yes there are some similarities. And luckily, all of these are taking place here so you guys won't be flying out anywhere! Or wait, isn't that a bad thing?” Penelope exclaims.
“Garcia,” Hotch says in his natural stearn and damning voice.
“Sorry boss. Anyways, The ME found traces of propofol and thiopental in each of their systems. For those of you who don't know what that is, it's basically a drug that doctors use to get patients into a coma before surgeries and/or if it's needed medically.”
“So only doctors would have access to it?” Emily asks.
“Over here in Virginia, yes. There are no stores that sell it here due to too many people ODing.” Spencer answers. “Garcia, did the ME find any signs of sexual assault?”
“No they did not. Looks like it was just tourture.”
“Hey Garcia, did they have anything else in common?” Emily asks.
“Yeah check this out. Each of the victims have a medical visit to “The Charleston Hospital” the night before dying. Or getting captured at least. And, it looks like each of them came in after what looked like an action of abuse. It was hard to spot but luckily the bill got it.”
“Okay, thank you Garcia. JJ, Prentiss, come with me. We’re going to the crime scene. Rossi, you go to the ME. Morgan and Reid stay here and try to find some things and connections. And Garcia, you just do what you do best.” Hotch says while getting up.
Everyone was gone from the briefing room except for Garcia who was taking down some files, and Spencer, who was looking at the file. But one part in particular. Could it have happened. No, it couldnr have. Could it?
“Hey Garcia?” He asked.
“Yes sugar,”
“Can I get something?”
“Why of course, what is it that you need?”
“Um, I need records and security tapes.”
“Come with me my sweet child.” She says while walking out the door and into her office, or as she likes to call it, batcave.
“Okay here are the records for-” She got cut off by a frantic Spencer.
“No, not for them, but for Y/N Y/L/N.”
“Your girlfriend?” She asks.
“Yes, my girlfriend.”
“Um, okay. So yeah. It looks like she went to Charleston um about 3 nights ago for some stitches.”
“And the security tapes. From that night. Can you see where she went? Or if she got in her car?”
“You doubt me. Don't doubt me. Okay so here. It looks like she got into this car. But, it looks like there is someone with her. Im sorry Spencer.”
“Don't be. Just, what’s the licence plate numbers?”
“Um, 56HI90ZC3. Spencer, if you want, we can talk about it.” She says in a soft tone. Thinking that his girlfriend would be cheating on one of her friends.
“No not now. I just need you to track that car, can you do that?”
“Done. Okay so it looks like the last time the car was spotted was here, Cherry Ann Avenue. It looks like they took a turn in this field, and that's all.”
“Great, I need you to contact Hotch and Rossi, and tell them that we got the guy.”
“On it. But, hey do you wanna talk about it?”
“Garcia, we don't have any time. Someone I love is in danger and I don't wanna waste a single second.”
You woke up to the smell of blood, the sound of crickets, and a gut wrenching pain, everywhere across your body.. Crickets everywhere. You looked down to see many cuts. Cuts all over your body, everywhere. And in one place, you swear you saw a knife. What had happened? How long was I out? You tried to remember everything but all you could was getting in a fight with Spencer and then getting in a car with a doctor. Or a nurse, or whoever they were.
“Ah, so you're up.” Michael said as he walked up from the shadows behind him.
“Who are you and what do you want?” You say trying your best to back away from him but something ties you down.
“You forgot who I am already. I must have added a little more meds in there for you. Huh, well that's alright. I’m Michael. More professionally, Dr. Michael Gray.” You just sat there trying to hear him over the intense pain you were in. Almost as if you'd been stabbed 100 times, maybe you had, who knows. “You see, your boyfriend was being the abusive piece of shit he is and so now I'm helping you. Helping you get better.”
“You sick bastard. You're not helping me, you're causing me pain.” You say as he gets closer and closer to your face.
“Shut up!!” He says as he slaps you. “I know what I’m doing!! Do you know how many people I’ve put out of misery!!” He yells in your face. You can feel the spit reaching your face as he does this.
“You’ve hurt those people. You've put them through pain. So much pain. Instead, you could have helped them. But this, this is not help, no this is torture, abuse, assult.”
“I SAID SHUT UP!!” He yelled while throwing the metal tray on the table across the room. “YOU KNOW WHAT, MAYBE WHAT YOU'RE PATHETIC LITTLE BOYFRIEND DID TO YOU WAS GOOD. YOU DESERVED IT!! Don't deserve me, or my help!”
You were shocked. You were scared. You were terrified. But you didn't want to admit it. And the sad part is, all he truly wanted to do is help you. But just at that moment you heard sirens. Sirens everywhere, and they got louder and louder until you saw the colors. Flashing up against the brown wooden wall and the shag carpeting on the floor.
Suddenly you heard a loud bang, the door had come down. “Michael Gray!” You heard someone yell. “Michael, we know what you've done, and we know that you’re here!”
“No, this can't be happening. No no no no no. NO!” He yelled in panic. The most stupid thing to do when you’re trying to hide.
Suddenly 3 people came rushing to the room. One of them happened to be your boyfriend. Who ran over to you immediately without any hesitation.
“Hey Y/N, it's me, Spencer. You're gonna be okay.” He said while holding you. All you did was smile and nod. You wanted to tell him that you loved him, but you just couldn't. You were so sore and tired. And all you wanted to do was go to sleep. Even though you knew that you shouldn't have since, well, you know. You would probably die. But you just couldn't help it.
You woke to a bright light. Or multiple in this case. Why was everything so white. White hurts people. You felt a tug to your hand as you saw who was holding it, Spencer. He stayed. And for god knows how long. He was asleep, and you didn't want to wake him. Poor boy looked like he hadn't gotten any sleep for the past week or so. You checked the clock as the time read 10:37pm. Perfect, just the most perfect time to wake up. You tried to grab your phone, but you had to stretch to get it, and you were not doing that.
Spencer, although woke up from your failed attempt at grabbing your phone. “Y/N, you're awake.” He said dreamily with his eyes half shut.
“Hi Spencer.”
Once he truly realized what was going on, he jumped up from his seat and gripped your hand tighter than before. “Y/N baby, how are you? Are you okay?”
“Well, truthfully. No, I am not okay. I mean, I just got tortured for god know how long, and I think I’ve been asleep. But again, I don't know how long. And oh god, I had my case that I’ve been working on for the past 6 months that was supposed to happen and I missed it!” You say as if the world was ending. He just looks at you. No emotion, just stares.
“Y/N it’s okay. I sorted that out, don't worry. You’re just okay. Why did you go with them anyway?”
You don't know how to respond. Do you tell him everything, or tell him nothing at all. Do you leave out some bits? No, he deserves to hear the whole truth. “Spencer, after what happened that night, I was terrified of what was gonna happen if I came home. And my friends were out of town. So I really had no choice.”
“Y/N,” His voice cracked. “I am so sorry for what I did to you. I truly didn't mean to do that, it just happened. And I don't know why.”
“I know.”
“You probably hate me, and I get that. I would hate me too if I were you. I mean, look at what I put you through. I’m so sorry. And I understand if you wanna breakup and stuff. But, I just wanna say that I love you. I truly do.”
“Spencer,” You say while looking down at your hands, then back up. “I don't hate you. I could never hate you. Not after everything you’ve done for me. I love you, I do.”
He just smiled and kissed you on your forehead. “Y/N, you wanna about it?”
“Talk about what?”
“Everything that happened today.”
“Sure, but how about we talk about everything that happened the other day. I mean, I made you pie Spencer, Pie!” He just sat there while you were laughing looking into your eyes. “I love you.” He said. You just smiled and held his hand, “I love you too.”
tagging: @criminalmindsmoodrn, @marshmallowtraver, @ghostly-angelic, and @himarisolace
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neverdoingmuch · 3 years
Note
I’m here for the ‘swords not as pets’ agenda. Swords as cars: solid, get you from place to place, potentially dangerous, customizable, something people name. Wwx losing his license taking the fall for a mistake jc made (idk, dui maybe?) and just choosing to mod the hell out of a self-balancing scooter or segway or something so it goes dangerously fast. Alternatively: spending 3 months inventing the first functional actual levitating hoverboard, with an insane top speed. 3 months in the (1/2)
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sawdfert this is delightful!! i saw segway and i immediately started wheezing,, there was no time for laughing i went straight to the wheezing. i think it would make more sense if wwx lost his car and got a motorcycle? like hoverboards and segways are cool but motorcycles have that big reputation of being dangerous and there’s the whole ‘rebellious teen gets a motorcycle and becomes a delinquent’ thing? like motorcycles are fast and if you crash it’s so much worse than if you were in a car and there’s no airbags or anything. but also?? wwx rocking up to school on a segway while playing his flute like the shittiest entrance ever? iconic. but let’s stick with chenqing as a motorcycle/scooter (motorcycle-esque scooter not the ones that try and take out your ankles).
okay so all the major sects are super rich so in a modern au it would make sense for all the sect heirs to get cars. i’m not saying that jc and wwx complain about jzx being stuck-up bc he was given a porsche for his birthday even though they were also given cars for their birthdays,,, but i am. at first it would have been this major point of contention between yzy and jfm bc wwx isn’t even their son so why is he getting a car too but wwx is like ah it’s so i can drive jc and jyl to school! you wouldn’t want their cars being left outside the school all day would you? someone in my maths class had their car get keyed and it was super expensive to fix,, and yzy is like yes wwx may have a car only to protect my children from parking hassles,, also wwx must pay for his own parking. so wwx and jc both get given cars for their bdays.
now wwx gets bored easily,, so you could translate him being a cultivation genius to him being really good at driving. im talking that jc is still getting the hang of switching gears and wwx is out there casually drifting around corners. (this does mean he has to get new tyres really frequently but he’s friends with wen ning, whose family runs the mechanics that wwx likes to go to so he just helps around the shop for a bit and gets a discount (yes its the family discount)). anyway wwx really enjoys driving, also! he just rocks up to wen ning’s place one day and is like dude, i wanna pimp my ride, wanna help and wen ning is like heck yeah. so wwx pays for some upgrades with his own money and he spends hours doing some custom work to make it look cool,,
it’s all going well until wwx and jc go to wen chao’s party one night and jc gets absolutely sloshed,,, like completely hammered. wwx had walked in, grabbed a cup of lemonade or something and was gonna hang with his friends but lwj was there for some reason so he spent the entire night talking to him in the back garden. which means that when jc wanted to leave he saw wwx hanging out with lwj and went ew gross and just decided to drive home himself. he crashes and when wwx comes home the next day jc gets super pissed at him bc he was meant to be the designated driver and if he hadnt been screwing around with lwj jc wouldnt have tried to drive home and now his parents will be super pissed and wwx is like woah chill my grandmother is a mechanic and she can fix this up just give me a couple of days. 
so wwx goes to baoshan sanren mechanics (which is just the back entrance to the wen sibling’s mechanics) and spends the next three days getting rid of all of his customisations and mods so his car looks exactly like jc’s. does he cry when he has to spend like five mins spraying the inside of the car with axe body spray to get the jc stench going on? maybe a little. but he does it and returns the car to jc! and jc is like oh wow my car is fixed, your grandma is a miracle worker and wwx is like haha yeah (:
anyway wwx mysteriously and suddenly discovers a passion for public transport,, it’s a good way to stay humble jiang cheng, he says, also i used all my petrol money buying porn from nhs or whatever. anyway wwx is doing the whole pt to school thing but then one afternoon wen chao and wzh find him and idk maybe the party got too rowdy so the cops came and wc got in trouble with his dad? he assumes wwx called the cops on him so he shoves wwx into his car and drives him out to the middle of no where and dumps him in the burial mounds scrap metal recycling place or whatever. 
the train line isn’t running that day and there’s no phone service either so wwx is stuck there overnight. he gets super bored. so what does he do? he finds an abandoned scooter and starts scavenging for parts. he’s not expecting it to actually work but by the time the sun rises he’s found some actually decent parts and he thinks that he could get it working. tbh he kinda forgets to go back home and just walks into town to buy some food and then goes back and continues fiddling with the scooter. he doesnt live there for the three months but the people in yiling just accept that this random teenager has all but moved into their scrap heap and adopt him anyway. so he goes and visits the burial mounds every day after school so none of his friends or family really see him anymore. 
until! one day he rocks up to school on his scooter. scooters,, are kinda like sad pathetic motorcycles,, but wwx mods his scooter with like a powerful engine and new steering and everything so people see it and go oh! a motorcycle! even though it’s not actually (can you do that with a scooter? idk but suspend your disbelief pls). so lwj is like hnnngg wwx in a leather jacket on a motorcycle but also wei ying, stop riding a motorcycle, *enter statistics about motorcycle crashes here* and wwx is like no! you cant take chenqing away from me. and jc is pissed bc they were meant to be brothers and have matching cars and be able to work on them and give them cool paint jobs together! but now wwx has this bike which has been modded to hell and back and refuses to drive his car bc it’s not as cool as his bike. so we get to have the whole ‘everyone thinks wwx is doing something dumb and dangerous’ bc he has a motorcycle and why isnt he just driving his car anymore? but we also get to keep some of the nuance of the demonic cultivation bc yeah it’s more dangerous than driving in a car but wwx doesnt have a car anymore and scooters are a loottt safer than motorcycles (if my two seconds of research is correct).
so! wwx won’t abandon chenqing and he did most of his work using scrap parts so he goes back to the wens and is like wen ning my best bro check her out and he’s like oooooooh and they start modding chenqing together. wen qing doesnt know why wwx is constantly over at their shop all the time but jc keeps arguing with wwx and wwx grows more distant with his family and friends bc he’s making ~bad decisions~ and a motorcycle is a gateway to idk teen delinquent shenanigans like smoking and doing graffiti so he’s kinda ousted from respectable rich people society and wen qing is like i have two (2) brothers now and they’re adorable not that i’ll ever tell them that. and wwx modding chenqing got him a reputation in yiling like everyone saw him walk in one day and then drive out with this sexy sexy bike so people start coming to him for mods and stuff and wwx earns the title yiling patriarch and wen ning, his trusted best friend and helper, gets called the ghost general bc idk he helps a lot but the customers never meet him. so they become some dynamic duo for car and bike mods!
anyway,, yzy delivers him an ultimatum one day: the car or the bike (or more accurately: the family or the bike) but wwx can’t drive the car anymore so he just gets quietly disowned and drops out of school. (we’ll save jzxuan the suffering in this au he can keep his car). he goes to the wens and theyre like hey whats up? wait no you cant live in a scrap heap,, not even if you buy a tent,,, just live with us please. and then wwx gets adopted by the wens and idk i want them to have a happy ending so wwx and wn go off and do some actual mechanic and modding training with some expert (sqdcfgt imagine if it was the real baoshan sanren who just happened to be in the market for some apprentices and saw wwx and wn’s work and was like them and then later realised it was her grandson). so they get their apprenticeship and they disappear off somewhere for a year or two - when wwx had been disowned he’d deleted everyone’s contacts and was like if they text me i’ll add them back but im not gonna have a contact list cemetery. (no one contacts him). 
eventually the 13 years pass and wwx has been helping the wens raise their little nephew a-yuan who is showing a real aptitude for being a mechanic even though he’s just a kid and just generally enjoying the quiet life of being a mechanic while doing fun mods and lil baby projects. then one day lwj’s car breaks down while he’s driving through the area and he calls up the local mechanic and guess who rocks up? it’s wwx. and then we get to have them dance around each other and wwx being like lwj doesnt trust me, he’s just sitting here and watching me work all day ): and lwj is like dont let him go dont let him go dont let him go,, and eventually they get their romance but this is way too long already so im im gonna end this here
i didnt mean to make this an entire au but i adored your idea so much anon so i kinda had to!!
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justsomefluff · 4 years
Note
OMG I LOVED that reaction you did, and the scenario like thing was really good!! I loved it, thank you!! Can I request another reaction (mini-scenario)? Like ATEEZ confessing to their crush while they (ATEEZ) are drunk? (San said Yeo does aegyo/is cute when drunk I'd like to see this ^^)
This is so cute, I would pay good money to see them tipsy no lie lmao. also this is fluff and crack at the same time so...I hope you like it lmao
Hongjoong:
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(^ he’d do this during a drunk confession you cant change my mind ^)
Okay so when he’s drunk I feel like he sees himself as being really composed and cool
but in reality... not so much
and, even if he hadn’t been planning on confessing to you
oh boy, his body starts shaking a lil and you’re low-key like... 911?
like his body is telling him to ABORT MISSION but once his drunk brain has made the decision there's no going back
So, in his mind, this is what he’s saying out loud okay
“Y/n, I just wanted to let you know that I have some serious feelings for you. I know you may not feel the same way, but I just needed to tell you.”
Super awesome, everyone wishes to be that composed right?
Well here’s what he really said:
“Listen here, you cute mother-, no I shouldn’t swear at you, my bad. I’m totally in love with you right? Watchu think bout dat?”
and then he’s quiet, and smiling bc he’s proud of himself and you’re just like um????
like that’s not how you imagined this would go
But you also know that he’s gonna be super embarrassed about this in the morning so you just say
“Let’s talk tomorrow, Joongie?”
and he smiles at the nickname and nods and kinda puts his head down
You honestly cant wait to tell him you feel the same when he’s sober
and make fun of him for getting wasted
Seonghwa:
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so Seonghwa, unlike Joong, is actually pretty composed
like at first, he’s wildin’ and everything
but then he just calms down super fast
like so fast you get whiplash
and he just smiles at you and you’re like “...freak”
then he frowns and he’s like “I like to look at pretty things that make me smile”
“You make me smile too, Hwa” :)
then he just grabs you into a hug and starts swaying you guys side to side
like some awkward and forced middle school slow-dance 
“What are you doing?”
and he shushes you to preserve the moment but you're like “I want answers”
then he finally leans his head down and his lips are brushing the shell of your ear so softly you barely notice
“I think I love you”
he strikes me as the kind of person who wants to confess but also isn’t ever 100% sure he wants to confirm that he loves you so he throws that “I think” in there to cushion the blow if you reject him
but, luckily for him, you do feel the same
you just turn your head ever so slightly to the side and peck his temple
he smiles and rests his head on your shoulder and squeezes your hips before wrapping his arms around you completely
“I kinda need to hear you say it”
“I think I love you too, Hwa”
Yunho:
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okay this big ole baby right
I feel like he’s the kind of drunk who is crazy for a little bit but gets tired really fast
so after like an hour of insanity, his eyes are drooping and you’ve settled on a couch (or seat, wherever your location might be)
and he smooshes his cheek into your thigh and you’re totally aware that he’s gonna fall asleep on you
but you’re cool with that, I mean who wouldn’t be
and after a couple minutes of silence, you think he’s knocked out completely
he suddenly turns his head to look up at you
and you look down at him to ask if he’s okay, or if he needs anything
he just starts laughing and then this IDIOT
pokes your double chin (bc I mean why does he have to look at you from that angle) and goes “How is it that I like you so much, even your double chin is cute?”
part of you is like “omg he likes me” and the other part of you is like “...im gonna slap him. don't talk about my double chin”
so, given your inner turmoil, you're silent for a minute and he starts to pout
“you don’t like my double chin?” and he makes a double chin and grabs your hand to make you poke it
“say you like my double chin too, please”
“Yunho, I like you too... double chin and all” (you had decided that you are not going to slap him after all)
and thats kind of the end of the night bc after that crackhead confession he actually falls asleep
but you are lucky enough that he remembers it all the next morning and it becomes kind of a thing in your relationship to make double chins at each other then say “I love you” 
Yeosang:
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drunk Yeosang and aegyo here we go
whiny baby voice and big eyes and pouting all the way
like he’s not so much into doing the cutesy actions like finger hearts and stuff
but refers to himself as “Sangie” and talks about himself in third person too
CLINGY
not necessarily cuddly, but always has to be holding your hand or else he’ll cry
calls you pet names like Jagi and my love and stuff
and at first you’re like aw he’s a cute drunk and tease him a little bit
but then he pouts even harder and murmurs “I'm serious”
you’re like O.O
“you mean it? you really like me, Sangie?”
nods his head furiously like you seriously think he’s gonna get a concussion for about .5 seconds
like okay I get it, you mean it, please stop doing that your head is not a maraca
“I like you too”
cue the biggest, goofiest, toothiest grin you’ve ever seen
makes big ole fishy lips at you, and points at them to ask for a kiss
so you just give him a quick peck, bc you don't really want either of you to be drunk for your first real kiss
but that satisfies him for the time being :)
San:
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Sannie best boy, I cannot stress that enough
the sweetest lil drunk okay
tries to take care of you even though he’s the drunk one
thirsty? he’s gonna get up and get you a glass of whatever you want even if he spills half of it trying to give it to you
hungry? he’ll get you some if you agree to share
so halfway through a tub of ice cream he decides to lay some truth on you okay
“I like my ice cream like I like you”
and you, of course, having seen that meme, respond with “ugly?” and you cackle at your own joke
but he’s so offended
“apologize to yourself and this ice cream”
“wtf? why?”
“because ice cream is the second most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen after you. apologize”
literally holds the tub of ice cream up to your face, and will literally carve a sad face into the ice cream to make you apologize quicker
and when you apologize he eats the sad face and draws a smile
sentimental cheeseball is all he is in that moment okay
“you really think I’m pretty?”
he looks at you like “...duh”
“I think you’re pretty too, Sannie” and he smiles so big :’)
and both of you know that this would be the start of a really happy relationship aww
Mingi:
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I bet Mingi is the cutest drunk okay like if you thought he was a giant puppy before get ready you aint seen nothin yet
and you don't even get a warning before he confesses bc he says it so out of the blue
like his whole plan was to drink some liquid courage iykyk and then he was gonna confess
but he ended up getting a lil more tipsy than originally intended
and he just blurts it out and he’s stuttering and lisping and just struggling to get all the right words out
but you just think it’s super endearing
“Minnie, are you drunk?”
he starts blowing raspberries in the air and starts shaking his head “you think I’m drunk?” 
literally hiccuping after every word lmao
like yes, Mingi, I think you're drunk
still blowing incredulous raspberries all over the place
and you blow one on his cheek and he starts giggling like the baby he is
“why you do that”
“bc I like you too, Minnie! also you were starting to spit and I needed you to stop that”
he giggles and nods at you, just happy that you feel the same way
nuzzles his head into your shoulder and plays with your fingers for the rest of the time youre together
Wooyoung:
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okay he’s a crackhead already so I don't even think alcohol would be something he’s even offered most of the time lmao
but when he is all hell breaks loose
no subtlety about his confession at all
like he literally screams it at you
he had been paying extra attention to you all night, which you didn't even notice bc you liked him too and never imagined he felt the same
so you’re like he so friendly and clingy when he’s drunk
but five minutes later he’s like “DID YOU KNOW IM IN LOVE WITH YOU”
and you’re so taken aback because
1.) he just screamed in your face
2.) he just screamed that in your face
and then he’s quiet and just staring at you, waiting for a response
you’re so dumbfounded that all you say is “you too”
but thats enough for him
“GOOD THATS AWESOME”
and thats basically the end of the conversation bc he gets easily distracted
you have to remind him the next day that that conversation had even happened actually
and he’s like “oh yeahhhhh”
then you’re able to actually talk about what you both feel and be almost normal for about ten minutes lmao
Jongho:
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since he’s on the quieter side compared to the rest of the group, I think this shows even more when he’s been drinking
but it’s almost concerning how quiet he is
like if you had never seen him drunk before you’d probably be really worried
and that’s exactly what happened
you went to check on him to see why he wasn't joining in the fun and he looks at you, a little teary from the alcohol
or maybe he’s just deep in his feels who knows
we’ve all been there amiright
and he’s like “just like you a lot you know that?’
you’re like “I was most certainly unaware of that, sir”
and he apologizes??? like why???
“I like you too, doofus, why are you sorry”
then he smiles and means it for the first time that whole night
he feels like he could crack all of the apples in the world he’s so happy
side-note: he probably could break all them apples fr
so basically you just made him the happiest apple murderer in the world
he’ll break all the apples for you baby
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misterbitches · 3 years
Text
some thots. having a bad time so this is rougher than usual. oh well
....
i guess he really does know hiim best cos if that was my mans (man specifically cos if anyone else did that id take it more srsly) i would be like oh my god ur singing me a love song? i would love it but i woudl SCREAM in embarrassment. UNLESS it was a really deep love song that's about us dying together.
like i want to eat ur skin type of thing (drain u nirvana) lmaoa but i really like this song it reminds me of that velvet underground song (the only one i know cos of juno lmao) and nico or whatever 'i'm sticking with you)
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my adhd would be out of fucking control i had to spend my time listening to this looking around i kept getting distracted by a tissue and thinking "wow this song is nice but i wish it would end bc i am getting distracted" and lo and behold i paused it and i have to pee and i know it's gonna take forever to undo this
ok about 12m later i turned it back on and they kissed and then he bit the corn then that night li chen also lost his virgin teas after watching gay porn and being like "hm interesting" and he'll be like "i see, ur dick is not medium sized"
i'm honestly gagging i cannot at this 12 year old marrying his mom
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beautiful theyre beautiful
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ayea you fucking psycho we do too because he was 17 and we had to witness it (or well, other people did cos i didnt watch the show even tho wayne song is [BEEEEEEEEEEEEEP BEEEEEP BEEEEP] and i want him to [BEEEEEEEP] and ppl even liked it which is fine like i get it in theory but they put this in my eyeballs so i'm gonna make fun of it bc it's fuckin DUMB lmao like i can't I CANNOT and he said "u were so persistent" BITCH UR 30??!?!???!?!?!?)capi hve it on mute and i tried to get a screencap of li chen and mu ren like together and not just his face but i cant find the timestamp and seeing their faces as they get married is literalyl traumattizing i'm like scremaing at my screen going "HE'S 5 HE'S 5 HE'S 5" and every time theyre like "we acn live forever together" like no bitch ur bones rae creaking
also is the officiator white? if anyone knows why or if that's common i'd love to know more. EDIT: HE ISN'T I JUST THOUGHT HE LOOKED LIKE MOBY FROM THAT ANGLE
anyway here
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i'm almost done with this fucking bullshit and i am in a really ould mood and usu they make it a bit better but imo it's kind of....annoying i guess balancing all these story elements and introducin gother couples (even in the periphery) since the story in itself can't focus. i feel like all in all the time spent with these two is a lot more limited and we get the feel for the rship because of their chemistry as actors, irl chemistry as friends and colleagues, and hopefully being happy and working on a good set. so it isn't the strength of the writing or production.
for some reason they get like less dynamic ways of being together which i think is part of their charm, they do things their own way, but the writers really should have substantiated this more. it's really just the way everyone in the show has managed to deliver these AWFUL story lines and production decisions (like seriously who the fuck was on costume? lighting?)
like maybe hot take but all the moments that are cringe and insane in the show are not pleasant, per se, because they aren't thought out clearly. so they're not a joy to watch in the normal sense but the actors are good enough to pull it off. i didn't cringe at the talks they had because it felt like actors like acting these lines out instead of us being embarrassed for it and you CAN TELL theyre embarrassed.
this is a huge kudos to the casting director and the actors and whatever crew that actually did a good job. i don't particularly like watching bo xiang and his grandfather husband not because of the content but because i feel like, to me, they're so awkward even though they have chemistry. i don't have that issue with xing si and his rapist brother boyfriend because watching them is actually really pleasant, it's intimate. this isn't to do with the story though because when it hits you how devoid this other person is and how stupid the situation is it changes (for me, for me, for me, this is all my opinion think whateverrrr u want im not telling u 2 ok!)
so truly kudos to this cast. idk if i'm misremembering here but imo the most cast appropriate series in this was crossing the line and close to you. one is a decent atmosphere and execution (yes even with that brother story line, notice the major key differences though because that's a sincere false equivalence. they try to execute power imbalances soooo badly and then fail every time but here's one meant to shock too and it was just likelmao ok girl?)
it may not make sense to say either in a writing way or for the character to do it but i believe that whoever the characters these people are supposed to be especially those super not well written on the page still get that message aacross (yong jie's actor is a good ex. not sure if i should ccongratulate him for having the worst job on earth and the worst character and his character is flat but. ostensibly they should let their actions speak for themselevs but what they do is they back themselves into a ccorner with unsuretyabout their characters or a dilemma that pops up they just want to excuse it. well guess hwat u couldnt do enough legwork. but to some extent the disposable side couple works here on a um "our eyes see them and get it" way
also to me it seems like they chose this story just to have this specific wedding. like it's a timely topic and i'm pretty sure like another provision? (correction? idk) was made WRT taiwanese same-sex marriage so it's topical but it isn't like a "papa and daddy" situation where they're interacting in it and there (for ex: the pride parade) and there being like real life terms and consequences. here it seems like they were like ah yes wedding ah yes dumb couple from modc bc we kiled off the other one sooooo (then outsource them to life love on the line u__u) then hamfisting in some fucking message which is funny bc
- despite the hints peppered in and the clear attraction they both acknowledge ur like ~not gay just him~ even tho...i mean i just. again they dont read over what they write i don't think considering. but wahtever.
- the only gay dude (verbally said) is with his rapist brother with an awful power dynamic oh or IS a rapist (gao) (or his brother but i think it was just a "im a psycho so it's him" thing unless they said it. in which case idc cos i wasnt paying attn but that's also not great) or i guess the wedding but like....that's also a ridiculously inappropriate and dumb relationship taht it's built on. i mean i don't really see much respect her so i dont particularly want to hear abt gay weddings being important when they didn't even utilize it in the story beforehand and have we ever. this is a huge indication to me that it was a reverse engineered chosen story beforehand (if it was one) or thought of
soooooo
so reversal of that....it didnt give us enough time to breathe with these two at all but for both of the actors they can capitalize what's on the page and the writers didn't. like their dynamic is very i give/you give like taking car eof each other etc that's why
again, no artist worth their salt will ever say their work meant nothing. that's a cover up. i'm sick of lazy production and then getting away with it claiming being subversive or attacking an issue by not doing anything. we show crazy shit all the time but it has a POINT and ur point is "i like the gays" then girl.....i mean it's not great
but the acting really carried it. i have a feeling if this series continues it might continue to use more experienced actors cos maybe the budget goes up but they also have less inhibitions now when it comes to acting. i like the way li chen expresss himself and teng teng too. i like anson a lot and there's some angles that did not do any favors and i think eh has to get more control of his body movements (bc he's SO LARGE and thin) but he wasn't bad at all and there were real human tears. of course i, personally, favor charles tu. he has more control over his body because he has...less to work with and he's a bit bigger and he was really great in this role. he's a himbo a bit of a meathead but you like him. you like them. there's some things i think they had them say and do that they wouldn't let happen if they stuck to the characters and the story (mainly liking that dumb idiot rapist)
what i notice is that the reprehensible actions people criticize others for in the show and in real human life lalways gets turned around. teng teng being surprised that this boy's grandfather boyfriend met him when he was a junior in high school and he's 12 years older and him apologizing for being shocked and then whatshisface going "ur better at it than most people" and then the convo about gao with whatshisface and then rapist brother comes to pick him up. they are admonishing gao but thinking that rapist brother is noble for doin gwhat he did (and oh rapist brother shows up) like the hypocrisy and the decisions are immense. so now it's like "guys see he's a great guy" like girl STICK TO SOMETHING but whatever so i live in this universe where muren and li chen do everything right and have lots of different interesting fun seex with all their friends. i would write this but i cannot i am dying
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stray-tori · 3 years
Text
An Innocent Sin & the good gay flashback ft. my descent into madness
I wasn’t sure if I should post this but I mostly want it archived so here we go. This is from like,, September?
So. “An Innocent Sin” is a dumpster fire unlike anything I’ve ever seen. I don’t remember why I decided to read it. maybe I was crazy. Either way... I read it. It soon started to touch upon (very very outlandish) sexual abuse which I thought was interesting. (the angst, not so much some of the wack circumstances surrounding it)
ANYWAY. at some point... we have a flashback. And not just that. It has a gay character.
And it turns rly gay. which mind you, is still in a het smut manwha (that has a “gay” side couple, but still!)
And it destroyed me.
For those who want to read it because I genuinely think the flashback is a decent bit, it’s all the bonus chapters between chapter 77 and 78 I think. There’s a part before that too, but idk where exactly anymore. (It’s on lezhin! or your platform of choosing)
I don’t THINK you’ll need any other knowledge to get the flashback bit? but it’s been a while.
Below the cut (rip mobile users), you can read all of my amazing reactions (all of these were text messages, for context - but I took most of the replies and convos about other things out). Post is also tagged as long post. :))
(i’m serious, this is fucking long)
__________
Here I am. Liking the gay flashback character. Feck. Main dude is still straight but idk it's cute pff
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This is a mess. The girl white hair likes, likes black hair, maybe, but thinks white hair is attractive
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What just happened is sth I'd like to know too pff He's so cute tho omg. Watch me melt Can we stay in this flashback before everything got perverted af and before white hair gets assaulted all the time I would send an eyebrow emote if I could Context: he's asking he says it again
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Ik it's not mutual but loookkk he's so sweet. He's kinda rude in present time, can't we stay in this flashback forever
I never asked for gay, never expected gay but I got gay
This story is trash why am I still reading it shdhhd
He caught his mom cheating. And now she's forcing him to watch??? What is thissss Well adoptive mom But still sudhdidu what Bitch how dare YOU exist
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Save my babyyyy
Yay sister that's not yet a rapist to the rescueee
This flashback is actually just nicer in every way let's just stay here This is a super long flashback btw Idek anymore what triggered it
Okay I think I'm gonna make the sensible decision and let this dumpster fire rest and just go sleep
It was very wild. I kinda wanna see white hair get therapy but it has 90 chapters and I'm at like 30... So I'm very concerned this is gonna be very dragged out. Idek if it's even finished ahahsududi - but I do kinda wanna see where it goes and see more cute Noah (white hair) so. Here we are.
yeahhh like i was down for the sexual abuse angst but then the mother killed the adoptive son's mother bc the dad had a thing for her?? and it was someone a person studying with white hair knew and so he's investigating and I'm like how did this turn into a crime organisation kind of plot
hhhhhhh i... i appreciate these horny things also tackling abuse but it always kind of gives me weird vibes to have both, especially when its very horny. And when people are horny to people who've been abused. Idk but I'd assume... you might try NOT to tie them up if they're frequently bondaged during their assaults. I'm just.... disjdksdj hello?? am i weird?? why are they fine with it???
also this manwha is so wild, theres this murder mystery investigation thing and then theres just a couple doing honry stuff sprinkled in between and i'm like OKAY
they rescued a guy in their basement and he's understandably very traumatized and they're trying to question him cut to our main couple trying bondage which i still dont understand bECAUSE HE'S A RAPE VICITM WHY ARE YOU OKAY WITH THIS the ones questioning arent the main couple of course but idshkjds
like im glad he's somehow okay with all this horny stuff despite his trauma and im glad he can be happy and have a nice relationship but DO WE NEED THIS MUCH OF IT he's very cute tho
i like that even when i try other stuff lezhin recommends me it still has large amount of gay in it
[mei: i mean... that's pretty great, if you ask me]
I mean I agree, I'm enjoying the gay eheheh these tonal whiplashes there's not even that much white space between the panels fhjd nvm it just turned horny goddamn it can there be 1 chapter without fucking? okay, there were the flashbacks
WE ARE BACK IN FLASHBACKS but im not getting the gay relationship, sad
OH WAIT AM I GETTING GAY COMFORT bc thats very good too
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OH NNOOO this turned sad very quickly
I'M SORRY IM SPAMMING BUT THIS IS JUST ANGSTY
I'M :((((
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different species confirmed
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I rly like them :((( I like the current girl too but it's just..... very horny with her. the flashbacks are nice [current tori edit: she’s very unloyal idk why i said I liked her] im weird HHHHH RIPPP 
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someone help him he looks so saddddd
not sure if thats the most healthy relationship but I'LL TAKE IT
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AWWW black hair's mom cooks mild food for them bc Noah can't eat spicy food :((( im soft
PFFF
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I LOVE THE FLASHBACKS :(((
awww
i feel like theyve done much more bonding than noah's current relationship. I mean yes I think its cute when she comforts him, too, but they rarely do anything besides be horny together
OH OH THEY'RE KISSING
best buildup, honestly
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the position is hornier than I'd like later here goes hope it stays cute
D-did someone just respect the word "stop"??? I am amazed
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i think you might uh. have some trauma stuff too so yknow
Dohye is a little dramatic in his reassurance but it's all rly cute so I'm :(( I like them a lot pls stay like this getting invested in flashbacks is always like: ik it wont stay but pls stay like this
hELP
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chapters ending in "i wanna touch him" is never good. I'm scared. Oh okay he didnt do anything. PHEW. He's already better than the girl, can't they just end up together lmao
[Noah was jealous]
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w-why do you look so evil dohye haukdhjs
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oh. oh no. the horny is starting. pls dont... just be cute forever
DOHYE NO YOU WERE SO DECENT WHY ARE YOU LYING ABOUT KOREAN TRADITIONS TO GET HIM TO DO STUFF HORNY STUFF TOO NO PLS STOP I JUST- WHEEE TvT the manwha is actually less visually horny in the flashbacks but im not sure if its bc its BL which isnt rly the genre of the manwha or if its bc they're still kids basically, which... I'd respect the latter, tho I'd prefer it to be like this constantly haha
okay. he's not respecting stop anymore, but it's also more of embarrassed nature more than "no i dont want this stop" so maybe i can forgive it. Still losing points, but he hugged him and it was sweet so HHHHHHHHHHH NOT SURE HOW I SHOULD JUDGE THIS SITUATION
They [Noah’s family] forbid him to visit his friends house I AM DEVASTATED
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understandable they're a rapist, a fucked up murderer mother and a father with a thing for younger women so
tho he dont know any of that but yknow he's so pretty just fucking end me on the spot
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hooo
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they are boyfriends and ik from the future that his sister is gonna ruin it allll she has those drugs that make visual imaginations feel like they rly happened to the person (dont know if thats real but holy fuck its terrifying) and she's used it before to say that Noah assualted her. and im pretty sure shes gonna use it again bc there was a panel of Noah remembering Dohye being uhhhh intimate with her and thats why Noah began to hate him and im so sad im not ready for it. bc he's denied it in the future and i honestly couldnt see it happening even before that or she drugged Dohye, i guess thats a possibility too
[current tori: oh girl, it’s neither and it’s wack]
which if, btich you gonna die even more enough rambling, more reading. this makes me so sad but also spicy
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on the manwha note, he thinks Noah doesnt like his family bc he's adopted and doesnt feel comfy which....... fair enough i suppose. and he's so cute im gonna melt just looK AT THIS 
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SHUt UP, IM GONNA CRY
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OH MY GODDDD he ate like ice and gum and all that, and Dohye assumed it was bc of the more spicy food and got rl worried, but he was just trying to get the smell out of his breath bc he wanted to kiss him ukhsdjs HOW CAN YOU BE SO CUTE HELLLOOOOOOOOO
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look at them. LOOK AT mY BABIESSSS
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how am i ever gonna care about the main couple again aww he-he wanted to go to the same highschool as him :((( im sad bc i know its not gonna happennnnnn
[mei: also at this point, you're literally never gonna care about them. i don't even know the main couple that well and i honestly don't care about them whatsoever.]
WAIT NO they're actually going to the same school awww ik it wont take long until sister fucks it up for them but for now theyre so sweet ohmygodddd
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cant he move in with them, fuck his family honestly
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dohye he's not a fucking pokemon iukhsdjs
oh. its. turning horny i am displeased with this development but i guess its natural for their relationship however COULD YOU DO IT AT HOME AND NOT IN SOME DUSTY SMALL ROOM how do ppl do this i like that the comments too are just "... is anyone still carng about the other girl?" sakjds
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this is the best 3 panels in existence.
h-he just took your hand dohye idk what to tell you
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[mei: "you blush at everything i do" god if that isn't me, idk what is]
awww its cute dohye is getting bonus points bc he invited Noah over while his mom wasnt home, they watched some sexual stuff and he DIDNT try to do anything what is this where can i get more of this
"well im not okay"
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MY BABIESSSS 
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they still didnt do much btw they're just kinda exploring and its honestly nice TvT I dont want this to ever endddd
[Dohye sees Noah’s sister and approaches her] N O
N OOOO
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this is the starttttt of something.......... TERRIBLEEEE 
:((( babyyyy
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I AM EMO
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Noah was drugged im sure. hes having dreams and waking up in pain and the sister is asking doyhe over I DONT LIKE THISSSSSSS OH HE DECLINED
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OKAY OKAY he saw him with her again but it was from behind and im not sure if it rly happened??? oh no this is terrible. Noah :((( poor child
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i am so emo about this
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[reminder he’s been abused TvT]
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[the sister: “Don’t you want to know why?”]
i will. murder someone he called to ask her to delete his number btw what is this manwha but this is just gonna make it that more tragic when whatever happens that breaks them apart :(((
he's such a good bf but Noah just wont TELL him his side I'M SO SAD
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I AM SO SAD
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No
NO
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It cant end im actually tearing up nooo you were so cuteeee and happpyyy
[*sister is telling dohye to come to the gym hall*]
what else is she gonna do she already teared [current tori: ahem... T O R E] them apart THAT'S NOT DOYhE. THATS NEVER HIM. OH MY GOD. is it a look alike??? damn, she's dedicated to just. ruining it, huh
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I’M
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I’M SO SAD
now he's switching SCHOOLS NO NOOOOO how will i ever find happiness againnnn NO they're misunderstanding further they're not talking properly i mean i get it but oh my god
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I'M :((( 
NO NOOOO pls make up in the future at least omg he tried to clear it up tooo ahhh i dont even have hopes for them getting back together but i just i want them to clear it up im crying first manwha to make me cry and it's this dumpster fire ahaha maybe a little too bc it kinda hit a little close to home i guess but goddamnn ittttt they were so cuteee and so happy and AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
OH NO. Noahs getting drugged and assaulted. And he's realizing it happened before, he just forgot. I am. so sad it's not horny drawn either which i appreciate but MY HEART NO
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N O DONT YOU DARE MAKE THIS WORSE
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Im. gonna cry more 
Doyhe kept an eye on him im so emo :(( but he thought he was doing well enough and gave up.... Im im so sad no i want you to make up and get back together its all just a stupid........... MEHHHH will i ever find sth like this flashback again
[mei: p-probably not, no]
i am so devasted i dont even wanna go back to the main couple just fucking. i want this relationship back :(((( but i guess the investigation might end up somewhere so hhh hhhhhhhhhhhhhh the baker manwha had a similar flashback feeling so. i just gotta find more of that haha
BUT THIS WAS SO SAD??? im so emo
[Dohye got kidnapped // the flashback commentary stops here but I think my descend into madness is pretty funny too]
OH YEAH THAT HAPPENED. THE FLASHBACK WAS SO LONG I FORGOT. NOOOO SAVE HIM. JESUS CHRIST PLS JUST ONE GOOD THING
its. actually rly smart to have another, more focused on them flashback, before the arc where he gets kidnapped by the rapist murder household so. good job. from a meta perspective but also NO but also. maybe theres hope for them making up at least after all :(((
[main couple kissing] this is. very weird now. but im glad he has someone, he deserves it but dohyeeeee
and switching to sex, YET AGAIN now i wanna see this EVEN LESS THAN I DID BEFOREEEE it's even.... a threesome now with one of the other characters why are you like this why can't you be. like in the flashback i am so upset HAHHHHH WHEEEZEEEE
I am just stop fucking jesus christ PLEASE I DONT WANNA SEE IT ANYMOREEEEE
im just stop the horny pls just tell me who that new guy is and why doyhe likes him so much
[mei: this manwha is a fucking mess but at least we got your lovely commentary out of it]
dhsuksj thanks i feel honored at least i got cute BL out of it before everything went [back] to shit
[mei: THAT TOO]
[...]
tbh im getting kinda mad about doyhe... i dont... feel like he'd just fall instantly for a guy who looks like Noah... but eh not my character
i just want closure for dohye at this point, fuck everything else ... not literally pls theres already too much of that
pls get it together for like 1 chapter is the investigation even still happening i am so confused save dohye plEASE wait what i have less than 10 episodes left Dont tell me this shit isnt even wrapped up yet
[Dohye is having a breakdown over the Noah double not coming to see him anymore]
yeah i this... doesnt feel like Dohye... at all... Even when Noah was rejecting him he was just kind of... taking it with some humor and maybe he was a little desperate and risky sometimes but... oh well... i do want him to get better but... im having a hard time believeing this development??? he never seemed overly anxious or anything. but who knows what else they did to him. Sister can still go fuck off tho
[...]
i mean. i liked the flashbacks a lot honestly??? it stayed simple and focused on the dynamics and less trying to balance smut with murder plots
[dm partner: NO THAT'S WHAT I MEAN LIKE CLEARLY THE AUTHOR CAN MAKE A GOOD STORY SO I'M JUST... CONFUSED AS TO WHY THEY DIDN'T STICK WITH SOME SOFT, FLUFFY BL ROMANCE MANWHA AND DECIDED TO MAKE WHATEVER THIS IS INSTEAD ]
okay i dont care bc dohye is currently getting assaulted nobody asked for this why i just. this is terrible. he was... so sweet. he doesnt deserve this. nobody does of course but jesus christ pls someone save him at least its not horny visually, one saving grace
ah... the assult is back to being depicted horny-ly thank you for nothing
[... removed some general confusion about the plot]
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YES. SOME SHIP FOOD.
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i am. suffering i mean i cant stop but GOD
okay so apparantly. the sister. has just an arsenal of people who look like other people Dohye, then Noah... and even Noah's GF??? this is ridiculous??
one good message 
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why 
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did you feel the need to add that [actual tired rage]
im gonna die this manwha is gonna kill me im laughing but im suffering oh hes arrested great and thats the end and the last update was in january of this year
why AS IN NOAH IS ARRESTED nobody who actually did anything is arrested What is this why is this AHHH I at least wanted the complete-ness of finishing this but now I'M JUST SUFFERING
[ mei: I MEAN TO BE FAIR I'D BE SUFFERING TOO BC JUST... WHAT THE FUCK I HAVE?? MANY QUESTIONS?? AND MANY CONCERNS BC THIS MANWHA IS JUST... AN EXPERIENCE ]
its an experience allright WELL
_______________
yup that’s it.
in my head, in a twist of events Dohye and Noah make up and are actual endgame. Something like that must exist out there but I won’t ask because it’d destroy the surprise and ruin the point.
That’s it.
Have a nice day.
9 notes · View notes
carmenxjulia · 4 years
Note
do you ever just think about how carmen's first reaction after hearing julia's voice in the fashion caper went from mild surprise to a smile? or how after she quickly disarmed julia, she gently put her gun back in her coat. or how carmen grabbed julia's hand? or how she made julia iin charge of her group despite barely knowing her? im still thinking about it and i cant fully explain why these small moments are so good? can you, please?
Absolutely. You’re talking to a person who created a 20,000 word fanfic based on a 45 second interaction. You want a Carmen and Julia analysis? I’d say you’ve come to the right place.
Yes, I do think about that scene a lot.
Let us begin.
Last season, Carmen and Julia interacted for less than a single minute. In that time, Carmen came to know and trust her enough to pass off the Magna Carta to her for safekeeping. And Julia got to have a real conversation with someone who was an international criminal and by some, might have even been branded as dangerous.
But Julia had always believed in her innocence and clung to the idea that there was more to each theft that most people didn’t see. Carmen leaving the Magna Carta was solid proof towards her theory that Carmen was one of the good guys. And it was a show of goodwill, a symbol of trust, that Carmen was banking on Julia doing the right thing and not taking full credit for its safe return (at least among her colleagues).
Then we get to season 2. Julia has, almost inexplicably, doubled down on her insistence that Carmen Sandiego is doing good in the world and is not actually a criminal at all. From the very first moment that we see her, she is trying prove her innocence. She asks Chase to wake up so that he can clear her name. She tries everything she can to wake him, and we as the audience are made to think it’s because she is concerned for his well-being… until the scene ends with, “we need you to tell us that she did not do this to you.”
Now, while I’m sure Julia would never wish death or permanent damage to Chase, she’s not trying to wake him because she particularly cares about him. He was rude and selfish and constantly dismissed her and yeah, Julia is the type of person who would still care after all that (refer to the first sentence of this paragraph), but it’s really really important to recognize that she’s not there for him. She’s there on behalf of Carmen.
So, what does that have to do with “The Fashionista Caper”?
We, the audience, are privy to Julia’s private conversations with Chief and other members of A.C.M.E. We get to see her defending Carmen, over and over, in the episodes leading up to episode 4. It’s not just speculation anymore! In Season 1, Julia had her theories, but was actively open to being proven wrong when provided with evidence to the contrary of her hunches. In Season 2, she is certain she’s right, and she stands by her belief that Carmen is good.
Carmen doesn’t see/hear any of that. She has literally no idea Julia has been defending her behind her back. No idea just how hard Julia has been fighting to clear her name with A.C.M.E. Not a single clue how conflicted Julia actually is, with having a job to do versus wanting to stand by the facts right in front of her.
She doesn’t see Julia again after the train incident (“The Chasing Paper Caper”) until they meet in Italy (”The Fashionista Caper”). All Carmen knows is that Julia is not as hellbent on catching her as Chase was, and that the Magna Carta were returned safely.
We, the audience, have a front row seat to watch Julia go from shaky theories to boldly proclaiming Carmen Sandiego is not who everyone thinks she is, despite seeming to be the only person who actually believes that.
Legitimately, Carmen has very little reason to trust Julia other than a gut feeling. There is no explanation for not only roping her into the caper, but immediately giving Julia her gun back and fully trusting she wouldn’t use it. Any other agent would have ignored Carmen’s request for help and gassed her right then and there. Carmen just inherently knows Julia is different.
We actually see an example of this just a few moments earlier. When Agent Zari tells Carmen to freeze, Carmen sets the gun off and turns it on her right away. When Julia shows up and demands more or less the same thing, the two have a little back and fourth banter. Carmen, no doubt, notes Agent Argent’s hesitation.
Carmen’s surprise no doubt came from her not expecting another agent, or at least, not expecting an agent to give her a chance to respond. Whereas Zari wasn’t afraid to get up close and point the gun directly at her face, Julia is standing quite far off. It probably took Carmen a moment to register who was speaking to her, and once she realized it was Julia, she relaxed, and smiled.
Julia helped her before, with the Magna Carta. So, why not seek her help more directly? Test the waters with the one agent who was willing to give her the time of day.
Not only that, but undoubtedly Carmen was re-formulating her plan to include Julia in it, right at that very moment. Honestly, the whole thing went far better with 4 people instead of the initial 3 (Carmen, Ivy, and Zack). So Carmen was probably like ‘oh hey that very reasonable agent from the train that I can probably count on to help me out if I also present myself as a sane and reasonable person.’ And then it actually worked.
But we can dissect this small change in her expression even further. Carmen is genuinely happy to see her/hear her voice. Not just because she knows Julia is raw and untrained and easily disarmed, no. Upon their first meeting, Carmen gave her the nickname “Jules”. In fact, Carmen has literally never spoken her full name, “Julia”. Even when passing off leadership in front of Ivy and Zack, Carmen still sticks to the Jules nickname. She doesn’t do this with anyone else. (Sure, Player is “Player”, but that’s purely upon his own request.) Maybe this is a reach, but, it feels like this indicates a completely different type of relationship and level of intimacy that Carmen shares with Julia and no one else.
Getting back on track.
Carmen probably took her hand as an extra precaution to prevent Julia from deciding to whip out her gun again. I mean, sure, it was also faster and easier to lead her by holding her hand. But also consider that the gun was holstered against her left hip, making it awkward to try to maneuver around her jacket with her left hand to try and grab it. With her right hand occupied, it would have taken too long for her to pull it out again, even if she’d tried. Honestly, taking her hand was the most practical action in this scenario, even if it was a bit intimate. It doesn’t have to mean anything, but it can.
It is also worth noting that although Julia believes Carmen is on the same side as A.C.M.E., she is probably rightfully confused starting from the moment Carmen takes her gun and then doesn’t gas her.
Julia’s orders from A.C.M.E. were to capture Carmen Sandiego in order to protect the Medici gowns. So when it turned out Carmen wasn’t planning to take the gowns, Julia had to decide that saving the dresses overruled the order to capture Carmen. The original mission she was given changed in a matter of seconds, making her have to pick a priority (Carmen or dresses). It also gave her an opportunity to work with Carmen and show A.C.M.E. she’d been right all along. But Julia, much like Carmen, had to trust her gut about this woman she barely knew, but had the utmost faith in.
As far as putting Julia in charge of getting the gowns to safety, that was probably the easiest decision of the evening for either of them. Carmen already knows Julia is one of the good guys. She doesn’t need to question her motives, at all. Not only that, but as mentioned above, Julia had already proven she could be trusted by ensuring the safe return of the Magna Carta.
Carmen knew V.I.L.E. wouldn’t be far behind, and dividing her attention could have been disastrous for the mission overall. I mean, she’s Carmen Sandiego, so, she could have probably handled it. But it was a much smarter move to put Julia in charge. She knew that Ivy and Zack were better at taking orders than giving them. She knew Player wouldn’t be able to coordinate well enough from his location. Carmen needed someone on the ground, right there, right then. Julia was available.
One final piece of this scene, that although it was not mentioned in the original ask, I feel is worth noting. Julia is actively worried about Carmen Sandiego’s safety. She outright asks, “what about you?” when Carmen instructs the others to get the gowns to safety. Why should she care? Her mission, saving the  Medici’s, is about to be complete. She’s about to really and truly prove herself to A.C.M.E. by being the agent responsible for saving the gowns. And yet she pauses, wanting to ensure Carmen is safe before she goes anywhere. A person that is supposed to be her enemy, although Julia has never truly believed that.
This is followed by Carmen pushing Julia back, not only urging her to leave with the gowns and Carmen’s own team, but moving her further away from danger as well as physically putting her body between Julia and potential harm. There are smashing sounds coming from the ceiling; clearly something bad is on its way. As usual, Carmen puts the safety of her friends before her own, which is a completely new experience for Julia. She is getting to see a caring and protective side of the super thief, one she was previously unaware of. Even for someone she barely knows, she’s willing to put her life on the line to save that of someone else.
And finally, even after Julia runs after Ivy and Zack, she turns back one last time to see how Carmen is doing. She doesn’t want to leave her behind, but ultimately realizes she has no choice. She certainly wouldn’t be any use in a fight. Plus, her number one objective is to save the gowns. Carmen Sandiego is probably going to get away. But the items she was sent to protect are now in A.C.M.E. hands. Job well done.
But Julia is left with the knowledge that Carmen Sandiego played an integral part in the success of the mission. She and Zari could not have saved the gowns alone (especially with the knowledge that Carmen was being attacked). Carmen Sandiego did in fact steal things- but it was to get the jump on another person or organization before they could do so themselves, smuggling the valuables away and returning them at a later date. Just as was the pattern Carmen laid out in Season 1.
Julia not only had her long-standing theory validated, but she got to see just how self-sacrificing Carmen could be. Putting herself in harms way while everyone else was encouraged to find somewhere safer. For someone labeled as a criminal, that was probably completely unexpected. Among a multitude of other unexpected things that had just happened. But that one may have been the most surprising.
All in all, there is a lot to say about this scene, and I could honestly go through it frame by frame and write a comprehensive essay. But hopefully this will sufficiently answer your query, and if not, feel free to send another ask.
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musette22 · 4 years
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hey minnie, i just wanted to quickly say sth in regards to tfatws. bc the thing is that when you (general you, not you specifically) talk about tfatws and just keep on mentioning how its not good for stucky or bucky and steve generally, then that erases the fact that this show is also about sam. and i am sure thats in no way your intention or anything, but it really can come across as antiblack, bc people keep talking about steve and bucky but not sam. 1/2
and when talking about a show but only mentioning two white men, one of them not even really being in the show, then that erases the fact that the show is also about a black man, which is very important for black people. you cant talk about how this show is bad bc its not what you want for your otp when the show has a real life impact on black people. making it all about white men gets antiblack real fast. im sure thats not your intention but please be careful when talking about tfatws. 2/3
i hope i didnt come across as rude but i had to condense what i wanted to say into a limited character count. i hope that you understand what i meant to say and if not please tell me and ill try to word it better. 3/3
Don’t worry love, this doesn’t come across as rude at all and you’re making some excellent points. I have answered a whole lot of asks on this topic at this point, and in many of them (including this one) I make a point of mentioning Sam, and the importance of representation. The reason I don’t do it in every ask is because some of the asks are just about Stucky, and I would feel like I’m just mentioning the race issue in a token way, which I don’t think does the cause any good either, you know? But I do agree that it’s an important factor that we can’t just gloss over all the time. Like I said in one of the asks I answered earlier, I’m not saying it’s going to be a bad show, I’m not saying story-telling wise these are all going to be bad decisions, and I’m not saying I’m not happy about the representation we’re going to get with this show, just that I, personally, do not like the premise of this show and am unlikely to enjoy it, for personal reasons.
Just for the record, I would LOVE a Sam & whoever show. Like, I adore Sam as a character, I think he’s gonna make an amazing Cap, and literally the biggest reason I’m not excited about this show is just that it’s built on the ruins of my (unfortunately white) ship (as a side note, I feel terrible about the idea that Steve just left all of his friends behind, not just Bucky but also Sam and everyone else, and just the fact that the show is built on that premise makes me feel uncomfortable with it). Had Steve not existed and had Sam and Bucky been two super cool characters who’d found each other through other circumstances, who knows, maybe I would’ve shipped them. For me it’s about the chemistry and the backstory, and not at all about ethnicity. I can’t speak for anyone else, unfortunately, and I hope that maybe your ask will cause some people to reflect a bit more on their opinions or think twice before they send in these kinds of asks. Thanks for sharing your thoughts, in any case! It’s much appreciated.
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paperjamz · 4 years
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some s/pop salt thoughts
im not a fan of g//limbow because it was executed so horribly in the show ._. i feel like i woulda legit shipped it if it didnt feel like they just paired off two (main) characters together because their relationship went from what felt like a sibling dynamic straight into a romantic one IN THE BACKGROUND. even their VAs had felt like their relationship felt like a sibling one!! i just... hate it!! the execution!! you have to admit that up until s5 all their interactions had felt platonic, that you’d have to squint if you wanted to see romantic undertones.
you might say... hey.. JAMZ what about PRINCESS PROM, to which i’d respond what about it?? you can say i can’t prove it wasn’t from jealousy stemming from romantic feelings, but at the same time i can say you can’t prove it wasnt jealousy stemming from completely platonic feelings! like i said, the romantic undertones of the ship is SO SUBTLE it could easily be interpreted as platonic.they had FOUR other seasons to give them more scenes that could be interpreted unmistakably romantic...... but they didn’t, they just crammed it in like, less than 6 episodes in the final one. and the ones in the final one was so... eugh, i legitimately didn’t know they were even dating until someone told me? b//ow kissed g//limmer’s forehead and i thought that was super sweet! i’d kiss my best friend too like that if i had the chance. at the time, i really liked that show was normalizing showing affection like that, because id love to greet more of my friends through kissing their cheeks/forehead. i didn’t even realize it was even supposed to be romantic until i read about it in a discord chat. i’m not the only one that thinks that either, a lot of people were surprised by the sudden fact that they were dating.
anyway, the lack of romantic scenes makes the ship very boring to me. it very much feels like theres no spark there that would attract these two beyond the fact that they have a lot of love for each other, which i’ve already said is so deeply entrenched in what is typically associated with platonic things, its hard for me to see them happy together. im not saying theyre terrible for each other im saying i dont see the romantic chemistry. they do have chemistry but ive never seen any hint of it that was unmistakably romantic. they probably do have the potential to grow it, but i wasn’t given the chance to grow into it and instead it just happened. quietly, in the background. god, the showrunner of the show even said that the ship was a last minute decision and fuck. it fuckin shows
and anyway freakin hate how the show had a chance to show that just because a girl and a boy are best friends, it doesn’t mean they have to date. what did the show do?? THEY MADE THEM DATE...... IN THE BACKGROUND................. THEY MADE THEM.... “FALL FOR EACH OTHER”...... IN THE BACKGROUND............. like....???? i have to be completely honest.......... i hate it so bad.... i cant even describe how much i hate these two characters being paired off like that..... like....... the injustice that happened to these two characters holy shit..... i don’t know how other people ARENT salty these two werent given a better love story than what they have.
would i have shipped this had it not become “canon”? i mean, maybe. it would leave a lot of things to me for interpretation, and how they would become a couple. i probably wouldn’t have minded it, and even indulged a little into it. i love both characters a lot and revel in g//limmer ships, but i just... its ruined for me now. yucky
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potuzzz · 4 years
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I can’t fucking do this.
I can’t play this game.
I’m so tired.
I can’t do anything I want. I don’t even know what I want.
All I know is that anyone who’s ever given me a reason to smile feels infinitely far away right now, and I’m left with a cold, unforgiving world that values things that I simply cannot give.
I don’t even want to leave the cesspool, because of knowing there are people like me I’d leave behind. Fuck I think I just want to die. I think everybody just has to die. Thank God I believe in the immortal soul and a relatively good afterlife because if I didn’t I don’t know what the despair would do to me.
It’s so ugly. I cannot even look at it.
I was a knight, and I was stripped, and now, I do all the things I scoffed at. All the things I promised myself I would never do.
I’m just sitting here mindlessly fucking around on the same 3 websites, nothing is changing, I’m just melting my brain in hopes that it will dull some of this horrible feeling.
But this visceral feeling is deeper than that. It’s deeper than surface emotions. It’s in my fucking soul. my soul is on fire and thers nothing left on this world to put it out. theres nothing that brings mejoy. i dont care. even if something pops up right now that would make me feel better, it will be fucked. it will all exist for the wrong reasons. i cannot even, for example, hope to meet a random new friend, because i cannot make new friends. it has, tried-and-tested proved to be impossible. im too broken. my mind just doesnt function the same way. if they dont hate and reject me, i will hate and reject them. i will pour everything into a rose colored illusion i project, and be viscerally, cripplingly disappointed when i finally dare to remove the veil.
im slowly accepting the veil. i was told by so many powerful entities that i must not submit to apathy. but im sorry. im too high maintenance. i just cant do it. i cant do anything i promised of me. at least, i sincerely doubt it. i just cant. i cant change the world for better. i can even be nice anymore. i forgot how to be nice, “stop being nice” they said, “ you need ot take care of yourself. you need to fight back against this ugly world.” well now im ugly and i cant go back. i used to be naive and unjustifiably forgiving and cringey and annoying and unhealthily passive and pathetically submissive and i fought those things just to become the thing i hated. and now im turning into a young adult and my formative window is over. i cant change myself. i can only hope to get a fucking aneurysm from the stress of just being sober or of not actively participating in self destructive behavior. im so tired. let me destruct. let me go out in a blaze of glory, an explosion, dont let me die softly with a pathetic whimper before fading nonchalantly into the background, to be easily forgotten. what a curse.
just let me stop working, fuck. either let me be a sheep, a slave, a workhorse, trained to rationalize on my own accord how everythings okay and im the main character and its all gonna be good and cool, but dont fucking put me in this middle ground. dont leave me alone with the darkness and then make me hop back and forth back. this is dehumanizing. this is...this isn’t fair. if they came to hear me beg, they’ll be satisfied. allow me the small dignity. allow me this one fucking thing.
take it out of my hands. put me in a war. a  big one. one where i can pretend that im doing something good, fighting for something bigger than myself. one where i have comraderie with people who i would easily hate in an other siutuiaton. youb know, bdy conditioning class in ghigh school was fucking great for this reason. all these shitty peole who would bully me, who would hold me in the loewst, cruelest form of contept, who would even continue this view of me at the beginning,w e all became equals through the trials of fire. imagine what bonding could be had over death and squallor and rage and intense, immeasurable, uunignorable suffering.
that’s the fuckign problem with the is world . all the suffering is way too damn weasy to ignore. death by a billion paper fcuts. slice me asuner with a fork of lightning, dont give me this undignified death. its cruel, pointlessly cruel. you lose nothing buy giving me somthoing dignified.
i cant even fucking sleep. i cant even have my own self for comfort, me versus the world baby. noep. its dead. i cant even talk to ymself. i cant even look at myself, as if ive done something wrong, when ive literally not done antyhting wrong, buefcause i havent done a fucking thing. i dont areif this is hyperbolic.
im so tired of saying the same words over and over
im so tired of seeing the same 5 different types of peopl,e
im so tired of being disappointed. show me something whimsical. something truly magical. something awe inspiring. terrigying. attack me in my dreams. rip my soul out its soft, comgfy shell, and thrust it into the sky, that visceral discomfort. am ai really a coward beause i didnt go sky diving or something? i dont know. am i ca cowrard because i stopped allowing myself...WHATEVERT THE FUCK WOULD HAPPEN IN MY DREAMS???? I DONT NOW!
blah blah blah wow noah this is going to be so useful in your brand building campaign wow hahaha youre so cool oure going to be famous boy! FAMOUS BOY! youre gong to be big and famous and universally olloved! everyone will be yor friend! eveerything woikll work out in the end. nbody you love will ever die or ever hate you. it all works onut in the end. it all works out in the end.your going to be GFAMOUS DUDE LAOL HAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHH HAHAHAHAHAHAHA THIS IS ACTUALLY MAKING ME SMILE!
DUDE, FUCK YOU!
FUCK OFF!
FUCK OFF!
FUCK OFF! FUCKI OFF!
WOW THIS IS GOING TO BE GREAT FOR THE ALGORITHYM THIS IS GOING TO LOOK SO GOOD ON THE RATIOS AND THE METRICS AND THE RED LINE GO WEEEEEEEEEEEE EAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAY THIS IS GOING TO LOOK SOOOOO GOOOOD ON YOIR PORTFOLIO WHERES YOUR PORTFOLIO CAN YOU LINK EM TO THE SONG DUDE YOU JUST GOT TO LNK ME TO YOUG MUSIC MAN!!!! IM SURE ITLL BE GREAT ILL LOVE IT :) :) :) O))IK
fuck YOU
fuck YOU
WHY DO I HAVE TO GO TO WORK TOMORROW LE ME STYA UP ALLLLLL NIGHT
ALLLLL NIGHT BABY THIS PATTY GOES ON ALLLLLLLL NIGHT
CAN I GET AN AMENE LOUDER FOR THE KIDS IN THE BACK
KIDS I N YOUR BACK ITS JUST THE KIDS IN YOUR BACK
YOU LL FEEL HOLY JUST HOLD STILL FOR THE 
ahahhaahhaahahahahahahahahahahhahah
if you’ve killed yourself Your’e a Damn Hero a(TM) and im not nmade at you. not anymore. i used to be, sre, but now i get it. i fuckin get it my guy. how fucking 1st world of me to think you wouldn’t. honestly. its amazing uyou put up with what you did. you’re souch a good musiciain dude. HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAH an ARTISSSSTTTTEEEEEEE I GOT THE BIG BRAIN BIG THINK TIME MY FEELINGS ARE IMPORTANT IM AN ARTISSSSSTTTTE
dont show your ASS FOR A SECOND OR THEYLL RIP YOU TO SHRED SBOY
just osme advice before the planks fdrtop
yeah just make sure you never do any of tis
dont hsow weakness for even a second
dont beg
dont beg
dont you pathetic loser
just be happy
just make your life happyier
you know
they always this new bullshit ass looking way of things, the whole, “they killed themselves it woas outside of your control there is nothing theyhat you could have done it was doomed from the start they made the decision THEY made the decision
like literally fuck you dude. whatever you tell yourself to sleep at night.
you might just be a grain of sand, but a grain of sand is a lot more than 0/. i get to live every single day with my sin,s, they are variou s and many and oh boy they are GREAT. , if i may do say so myself. but i dont.
pause
more dirnk
*jeopardy song(
All i have is imagined scenarios. All i have is parasocial relationshiops. All i have is people im supposedly super close with that i feel a constant need to hide gfrom.
you don’t know me. and when i let the mask slip for a seocnd you are repulsed. fuck you.
i’d like...i liked to think it was because i was special. because i did omthing outside of the norm, that brought this...new thing that had to be contended with...HAD to be contended with...for the human speices to evolve. i was just a small LEOG brick in the gram dn sceneme of things, sure, but i was an actaual...i was a VESSEL. I was a VEHICLE>. now what am i. nothing. a waste of tiem.e a waste of love and anergy and resources. of hope. how dare you hope for me. you have no idea. luck is in not many people’s favor but i dont even have the money for the lottery tickets. i wouldnt even know how to read the numbers if i wanted to. i’d be too much of a prudish, self-centered, egotistical, unbearably annoying hipster to use the numbers even if i could read them, and i know this to my fucking core. it’s like i’d rather ...
FUCK THIS HALFWAY POINT
THE HALFWAY POINT BETWEEN SLEEPING AND AWAKENING IS HELL
AND I HAVE SETTLED PERMANENTLY ON IT
for why?
SPITE
I SWEAR TO GOD BECAUASE I CAN THINK OF NO OTHER RESOASN.
it doens’t matter.
i have to stop typing and go to bed.
and shut my eyes.
and sit in silence.
alone.
so alone.
and wait for sleep to take me.
and then wake up and flip burgers.
it has to happen. i cant stay up all night. i’ll fucking die tomorrw. i wish i could just stay uo all night.
amyabe i should? like i mean seriously, accelerationist based shit but like, maybe i just need to lose my job just to...rip the bandaid off.
everyone, im sorry if youre reaing this, i;m okay. im just in a rough spot. im sorry, please ignore this. im sorry.
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