Munkustrap: I would like to be the jellicle leader someday so no, I have not smoked marijuana. I ate a brownie once, at a party in college. It was intense. It was kinda indescribable actually. I felt like I was floating. Turns out there wasn’t any pot in the brownie. It was just an insanely good brownie

*pre-CATS*

Demeter: You haven’t said much in a bit. You okay?

Macavity: Oh yeah I’m fine.

*beat*

Macavity: Do you know how to get blood out of fur?

Rumpleteazer: What's the name of that mouthy kitten bothering Tugger?

Mungojerrie: I don't know. I'm trying very hard not to connect with people right now.

Ivy: I’ll take a whiskey on the rocks.

Calvin: Milk. Fat-free.

Ivy: Pussy.

Tumblebrutus: Jemima, babe, I promise I‘ll give you a creampie, can we please just play Super Smash Bros first?

Bombalurina: Cassandra knocked that smug look off my face, but luckily I was wearing a second, smaller smug look underneath.

Cassandra: "Having fun there?"

Alonzo, gluing feathers to his face to try and blend in with birds: "Oh absolutely."

Volleyball, visibly distraught: “-FOR LIKE THREE MONTHS!!!”

Blue Pearl, having just walked in: “Mm...What’s going on?”

Citrine, embarrassed: “It’s not—oh hi Blue— it’s not that big of an issue V...”

Volleyball: “THREE. MONTHS. YOU LET ME NURTURE AND SING TO AND WATER A FAKE PLANT WITHOUT TELLING ME IT WAS FAKE”

Volleyball: “THREE!!!! MONTHS!!!!”

Citrine: “I DIDN’T KNOW EITHER!!”

Blue Pearl, who bought the fake plant: “(･･;).”

Jellylorum: Please no flowers for Valentine’s Day.

Skimbleshanks: But why?

Jellylorum: What’s the point? They’re just gonna die.

Skimbleshanks: Wait- when I said that about having kids you got mad.

Macavity: You know, this would go a lot quicker if we did things my way...

Mistoffelees: Since your way probably involves murder, I think it’s better if we don’t.

Mistoffelees: I think I'm in love with you.

Macavity: Not the best idea you ever had, but I'll happily take it.

*Mr. Mistoffelees enters, to the sound of dramatic music*

Mr. Mistoffelees: ...Huh, thanks for the musical cue!

The Rum Tum Tugger: Any time, baby!

Minashti: My friends say I get to motherly with every kitten I spend more than 5 min with.

Minashti: And I find that so uncalled for!

Minashti: Specially when later they are like : "Min, realise the reason you get overattached to cats younger than you is the fact you never got the chance to create real familiar bonds with your parents because of their early passing away, leaving you only with your brother and with a group of cats that dislike you. Not only that, but that very same brother, who was the foundations of your emotional stability, starting disliking you as well and he's the reason you lost your litter and your chance to form a biological family. You didn't have an actual family until you adopted your nephews and Nileeno, moment where you realised the comfort it gave you caring for cats and promised to yourself that no-one else would feel alone under your watch"

Minashti:

Minashti: Like I say, uncalled for.

Gentlemen

Kiyan: Gentlemen…

Adrien: Oh shit.

Kiyan: What?

Adrien: It’s always trouble when we’re gentlemen. I prefer it when we’re imbeciles.

Titus: Or dolts.

Gisbert: Dolts is good, yes.

“People who say "go big or go home” seriously underestimate my willingness to go home. It’s literally my only goal for most of the day.“

Mordecai Heller

Macavity: I’m tired of people being mean to me just because I’m cringy, evil, terrible, and I eat toxins.

Plato!Admetus: Hey, don’t think I’ve seen you around before! I’m Admetus.

George!Admetus: This might get super weird, seeing as we have the same name.

Plato!Admetus: Hahah, oh really? What’s your name?

George!Admetus: …I’m sure you can guess.

Plato!Admetus: Really? Hmm... Wait. Fuck. I’m sorry, long day.

Incorrect Quotes Time!!!

Deathmask: Catching, I’m quite good at catch.

*Shura then pretends to throw something at Deathmask*

Shura: Well, you could’ve gotten that.

Deathmask: Yeah, that could have gone one of two ways.

*Chuckling could then be heard*

Deathmask: Well, I’ve got a problem actually; I don’t have a pen.

Pope Shion: Deathmask, bigger news; I’ve got a pen and you’re good at catching. *Shrugs*

*Pope throws pen only for Deathmask to catch it*

Deathmask: ;P Skillz

Pope Shion: -_- (Almost had him...)

When you want to see someone fail yet they succeed anyway; Don’t worry Shion, we’re sure you’ll get him next time.

Macavity: Tonight is a good night for death.

Mistoffelees: I don't want you to die...

Macavity: Oh, no, not me. For someone else to die.

Mungojerrie: And that’s when that demon towered over me, bearing his fangs and claws...

Mungojerrie: He started laughing, all evil like, and said:

Mungojerrie: “That’s right, I got you, little cat! And you better obey my every order or I'll torture and kill you!”

Mungojerrie: “Mwahaha!”

Mungojerrie:

Mungojerrie: And it was Macavity!

Macavity:

Mungojerrie, puts an arm around him: And we’re still friends today!!