#cause I didn't know how things worked

[theminecraftbee]

on the one hand, watching joe run vaults is very fun! on the other hand, watching joe run vaults actively hurts me, i think,

#stream liveblogging #i'm not even talking about not knowing how trapped chests work that's reasonable if you're new #it's stuff like 'he had his wand in his hotbar being useless' #or 'joe i know why you didn't take vein miner but consider how much faster you could loot the chests PLEASE' #it's things like that. which are causing me pain and i will be quiet about.

[revivisection]

i thought well. can't have this guy mention flashdrives looking like that (ignore the fact that tunisia is not canon)

#my art #dishonored #the outsider #modern au i suppose #in the first game he's a buckles boy and in 2 he's a buttons boy. it's time for him to become a zipper... zoy #you know the letter z doesn't give you a lot to work with #his dh2 jacket reminds me of a motojacket zipped up all the way #and the buckle on the bottom echoes the buckle on his dh1 jacket's collar :) #there should be at least another zipper pocket on the chest but i think this is enough for him #the boots were gonna be a lot busier (laces or buckles or both) but it didn't fit #there's a simplicity to his outfits i wanted to keep #the boot zipper is broken and stuck halfway cause it reminded me of how he's missing some buttons (also same thing happened to my boot) #aaand humansider has a friendship bracelet because i make them and i think it would be nice for him to collect items and have them #because they are his. #high five if you get the tshirt ref lol

[painalotwww]

#eminem #slim shady #fanart #eminem fanart #Detroit: become android #智械危机 #这个年代还在炒底特律大变活人的冷饭这样真的好吗 #My housekeeping Android is a dumb bitch whos only capable of use the microwave #Then I found out he was just a piece of junk been made from sex doll that had gone off the market #So I decided to treat him the proper way like fuck him everynight，you got a hole down there why should I waste it #I think things are going well，I maybe in love with him already…… #oh yeah，he's my wife now #however since he really doesn't know how to do housework，I ordered a new model of Domestic Android，you know，cause I really can use it #I didn't know this decision would become a serious problem #Damn he thinks I'm replacing him #he's really having some trust issues，given his past work experience I got him #But that's not the excuse for him stabbing me like ten times

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

you absolutely already know this, but i adore your work. i think it's hard to avoid the pressure of being surrounded by people we might consider "true artists," but the fact is that, frankly, everyone who makes art is an artist.

before this year, i hadn't drawn a complete piece in nearly three years. the line work i did produce felt abysmal and i was tempted to give up. then, i saw your comic and i thought, "wow, that's really cute, and it looks like a fun style to emulate."

i drew you, pondering me, eating grass. and it WAS fun. i forgot how fun it could be. i can draw lesbian horses, or pony!WWX throwing a chicken, or me eating grass. i can even make shitty memes! and all of it, no matter how good or how bad, is fun again.

you bring a lot of fun to people here. that's something equally as important as people who cultivate fancy line work or expert level digital painting. i'm sure that's something you know, but i hope it never hurts to hear it.

happy first season, friend! i can't wait to see the rest.

As a chronic perfectionist, it's been a long journey for me to accept that 'done is better than nothing' and that the worst critical voice is my own. Sure there's people who've gone to professional art schools, and those with a more than a decade of experience on me, but honestly? Would I tell a child their sonic drawing isn't art? Just because they have no 'experience' or 'technique'? Absolutely not. So I'm no longer saying my efforts should not count as art.

At the end of the day, art is what we choose to make it. We have the power to create whatever we want. And we are going to use it to have fun! We never lost the love and fun for creation we all had as children, we just told ourselves it wasn't enough. But it really is B*)

#ask #non mdzs #Thank you so much for this very heartfelt message B'*) #This kinda hit hard for me cause this blog isn't actually my first attempts at art (started with the classical florals and life drawing) #but it stressed me out immensely. All I could see was flaws and it made the process miserable knowing I wasn't going to succeed #So I stopped trying. I didn't draw for *years* #The point of Poorly drawn mdzs was always 'it doesn't matter how it looks it matters that I just keep going' #and it made art fun! I was making comics for ME and no one else. The bar was so low and I really could only go up from where I started #I think art block might be 50% fear of failure and 50% the weight of expectations. *That's* why art is perceived as 'hard'. #I'm gonna be fully honest here; your art is GORGEOUS!!! I'm glad you didn't give up B*) Though I understand the feeling. #I have greatly enjoyed chatting and collaborating with you! Thank you for so so many things #I hope to see more of your work again in the future!! I hope you keep finding the joy and fun in the act of creation! #is it not so amazing we can make something out of thoughts in our heads? #Lets all remember that art let's us draw ourselves eating grass and realize how wonderful that is

[donnyclaws]

I was gonan make a post apologizing for lack of regular art but I feel like jts already clear im sporadic and in and out of it bc chronic pain and circumstances. So for now I'm gonna hibernate, get my health steady again, deal with money issues, and art will happen when it happens.

#i do feel kind of worn down by it. i wish patreon and commissions didn't feel so taxing even with accommodations ive made for myself #maybe it'll feel better in the future when less is going on but rn it #places this barrier of management in front of art that makes it less relieving to do #cause there's always a part of my brain reminding me it needs to serve a purpose and needs to pay off in some way #which isn’t a new feeling for artists obviously. maybe doing it all since hs js also why it's tiring. and patreon changjng the way it does #working part time now too. idk if maybe id like to step back from it #it's abnormal that i worked taht hard and it did help me get out from my parents and stay out. but im also tired ect #idw let people down by not being able to keep up with a self imposed expectation or #be irresponsible and remove sources of income for myself. redbubble inprnt and patreon all suck in ways that bother me hugely #i only really enjoy itch.io at the minute #not to say anything bad abt patrons or commission clients you've all been excessively kind and patient and understanding always #i wish i could make them better i feel like there's no way how it is at the minute is of value compared to my output as an older teen #but yknow. self imposed worry. im just worn out and id like to just make things without the management and the fretting and the #i havent made a comic post for patreon in ages or this or this i havent made a speedpaint or a song or #yadda yadda lmao #sorry for the impromptu ramble #this isnt to say id never do commissions or a store or anything again or i want to not make money off art #god knows i will need to be grinding out comms once im well again but ex #i feel like im getting less and less able to manage it and then putting out less and less #and hoping ill somehow get very healthy and active again one day and make it worth the wait yknow. #it's not a feeling i want my art to carry in me. #part of me and the parent in my brain is saying it'd be selfish to give up income but the rest is like #that's cruel. i want to feel good and healthy

[5231045]

attempting to map out 221b

#not confident about the ground floor other than the kitchen and bathroom are next to each other cause plumbing #there might be a small window in bedroom 1 ground floor cause the wall seems to not be blocked on the outside #yea bedroom 2 ground floor is noisy af cause street lvl windows and double staircase foot traffic lol #originally I was going to shove the bathroom under the staircase lol #yeah so idk where to put the attic staircase #also the attic interior is way too long to fit in the roof #unless the attic is the mf tardis #anyway do not hold me to this lol #lmao updated commentary -> #changed up the layout based on new info and some comments I got on the first/rough version #it's still not 1:1 to the canon designs but I've tried to place things in a way that make sense and fit into the building (sorta) #the interior only makes sense if the building was way bigger than it's depicted as #also I wanted to put the attic access in the closet but it didn't fit right #been treating the windows on the side of the building fast and loose cause man idk I don't get paid to do this #the only way it makes sense that there's light coming through from both the back and front windows is if there's an open enough space behind #maybe the building behind 221b is like.. long and narrow. or L shaped or something idk #still don't know how I feel about the main and attic stairs placement and layout but they work(?) #reference #ref

[natelia-aldelliz]

Guys... Listen I know I said I'd draw something for valentine's day but I had a bit of a rough week sooooo I'm just going to write it out instead, maybe I'll finish drawing it some day, maybe not. It's behind a show more because it's long.

(also there's talks about having sex but no actual sex, and like, general warnings about Ghost's backstory but it's very vague here).

Soap was hanging around outside, trying to bring himself to do something, anything. But the weather was nice for a February day, and the sun was out, and it was making him feel like a cat basking in the heat.

An arm wrapped itself around his shoulders, a huge body suddenly weighing on him. Ghost.

Soap hummed comfortably. This day was getting better by the minute. Any chill he might have felt from being outside in a tank top out of pure Scottish spite was instantly soothed.

Simon often times saw himself as a cold man, freezing to the touch, hidden behind a layer of ice. A proper little Elsa, Soap almost snorted out loud. The truth was that while yes, his fingers and toes' temperature was sometimes abysmal, especially in bed, the rest of him was the warmest place Johnny had ever been.

"I've got something for you in our room," Ghost whispered against his throat, making Soap shiver.

Simon had begun calling Soap's room theirs a few weeks ago and Johnny couldn't have enough of it. He was so in love it genuinely hurt sometimes to restrain himself from squeezing him to death.

"Is that so?" he purrs, knowing how Ghost likes that. If this day didn't end in sex he'd be very surprised. He'd long learned to recognize when Simon wanted sex and when he didn't, and the way he squeezed his pec in response to his voice was a very easy tell.

But then again Simon was way less subtle than he thought he was.

They made their way back to their room, and there it was, a repurposed shoebox, badly wrapped with cheap wrapping paper. Johnny couldn't be more excited, he had never received any gift from a significant other. To be fair he adored gifting but always felt awkward receiving.

But this was Simon. Something that Simon had chosen to give him.

He sat on the bed, leaving enough space behind him for Ghost to sit there so he could use him as a very comfortable backrest. When he did, he grabbed the gift and began opening it.

He knew that Ghost liked to tear the wrapping paper, liked the sound of it and liked tearing it into the smallest pieces possible after, but he himself loved carefully unwrapping it and folding it flat so he could later maybe do an origami with it or put a piece in his journal. Probably both.

This one was full of tape but he still very much enjoyed himself, considered it a challenge. He enjoyed the chase, wanted to drag it on. Ghost huffed impatiently behind him, a bit tense, probably nervous.

Inside the box was a weird old fashioned clunky thing. It was bright red, looked slightly like binoculars, definitely from the 70's, with a wheel of tiny pictures wedged in the top of it. Memories hit him all at once.

"Oh my god ah remember, my Ma had one of these when ah was a child! My sister and I loved it, it had pretty landscapes in!"

He put it against his eyes, excited to see what this one came with. At his biggest surprise, it was a picture of them. Simon had customised it.

The picture showed the back of himself a bit further away from the camera, pointing at something while in full gear, in a dilapidated town, Ghost's face in the foreground looking at the camera. It looked like Soap was talking to someone, but that person was cut by the framing.

"Wait, ah remember that mission, it's when ah saved Gaz from a landmine just to be shot seconds later," he laughed. "ah spent two fucking weeks in the hospital, ah was miserable. Ye kept joking ah should hiv left Gaz explode while staring at him, he was convinced ye actually wanted him dead!"

Then the next picture was indeed him in his hospital bed, unconscious but the state of his injuries told him he was probably just sleeping at least a few days after his admission, his life no longer in danger. In this one, Ghost was sleeping too, head in his elbow near Soap's head and his other hand holding Soap's hand.

"Who took this one?" Soap asked, moved by the tenderness of Ghost's hold on him in the picture. It would have been right after Johnny had admitted to maybe liking him more than friends, before they were officially dating.

"The hospital one?"

Soap hummed.

"Price did. Said it was for blackmail. Should have seen him, he looked like his child had just married the person of their dreams and had ridden off into a rainbow on a unicorn or some shit. Old man's sentimental as fuck, but I didn't call him on his bullshit, he's already old, that's punishment enough."

Soap giggled in response. The next few pictures were all of them together but each time he was either turning his back or asleep.

"Why the fuck am ah never looking at the camera?" he whined. He wanted some cute couple pictures, dammit!

"Couldn't have you suspecting what I was planning," Simon said, kissing his shoulder soothingly. Only then Soap noticed that he had taken his mask off at some point and turned to ask for a proper kiss, which he immediately got.

"Keep going, there's more pictures," Simon whispered against his lips when he tried to turn around to kiss him some more. His pouting only got him a smirk in response, so he got comfortable again and brought the slide viewer back against his eyes.

He was happy he did. The next picture waiting for him was just Simon in the mirror, almost in full gear, but with one gloveless hand dragging his trousers down so the camera could see the bottom of his stomach, follow along his happy trail and reaching the very top of his pubic hair. The picture cut of his head, but he could see that his mouth was uncovered and he was holding the glove with his teeth.

Soap groaned. "Steaming Jesus, love, you're so hot."

He felt Simon hide his face in the back of his neck, warmer than usual, and chuckled a bit. He loved him so fucking much.

There were four more pictures of Simon, in various suggestive poses and states of undress, some almost showing his cock but never quite committing, making Johnny feel like he was being teased.

He was getting hard though and so ready to be done with the pictures and access the real thing. But Simon was still tense behind him. In fact, he had only gotten tenser and tenser with each click.

Soap was unsure why. They never had a problem with their sexual life, Simon had already changed his mind about having sex after starting and Soap had absolutely no problem with that, was glad to hug him instead and reassure him when he had tried to apologize.

Simon knew that there was no pressure, ever, to have sex. Hell, Johnny would still be happy even if Simon decided that he never wanted to have sex again, and he had made sure to make Simon understand that.

Then he got to the last picture and immediately understood.

It wasn't a picture of either of them, just a little bit of paper, with a few words written in Ghost's awful handwriting.

Just a few words that made Johnny drop the viewer on the covers and turn around to grab Simon's face, worriedly looking in his eyes.

"Are you sure?" he asked, looking for any trace of Simon forcing himself. "Baby, ah'm happy to bottom for the rest of mah life, there's no pressure, okay?"

Simon looked at him with warmth in his eyes and his cheeks completely red, a wrapping bow added on top of his head. "I know," he said simply. "I just want to. I don't want to be haunted by memories anymore. I used to like it, and I want to like it again. With you. Just.... Be gentle, okay?"

Johnny kissed his forehead. "Ah dinnae think ah ken how no tae be gentle with ye, love."

#cod mw2 #simon ghost riley #john soap mactavish #ghostsoap #soapghost #listen i'm sure there are romantic people somewhere who think it's valentine's day everyday so how late can that be #to be fair i am terrible at deadlines i don't know why i keep giving them to myself cause i soon as i do i know i'm never doing the thing #i've also burnt out my drawing capacities for now so probably expect more writing than drawing for a bit while my poor tiny brain recovers #if anyone is wondering yes soap forgot it was valentine's day #not because he forgot about it - he just forgot to track the days and didn't know they were the 14th he had a gift ready tho #he got ghost a chocolate tablet that ghost had once complained about not being able to find anymore that's actually just me complaining irl #that my supermarket doesn't seem to have white chocolate tablets with puffed rice inside like they did when i was a child #i have no idea how that applies to anywhere else lmao maybe other supermarkets have them but i hate going to supermarkets i don't know #anyway lmao sorry my love language is ranting #soap doesn't generally like receiving gifts because he feels like he doesn't deserve them like he didn't have to work for them #and so he feels guilty when he gets one but he hasn't told anyone about that #he was happy there but if ghost gives him ''too many'' gifts he's gonna start feeling bad bc he has just as much issues as everyone else #just hides them better

[chennnington]

It's kinda pathetic how I just googled "how to call in sick" cause I have never done this in my entire life. What do I say? How hard will the doctor judge me? Will she agree that I'm sick enough? Do I just go "okay" and go back home to my desk and work if she thinks I'm fine? And even if she agrees I'm sick enough, is there any paperwork? Do I have to make any additional phone calls? Won't it be easier to just work instead of trying to figure this out?

#by now I think I know how things work and I have some coworkers I can ask who won't laugh at me #my main issue is that it'd feel like lying #I mean sure I cry at work every day or feel paralyzed and I have some physical stuff going on that may be the result of stress #but I'm also alive and breathing and my job is just being on the computer and reading and typing #you can pretty much always do that unless you're in a coma #and a doctor is mainly focused on physical health. maybe they have the same opinion on mental health as the external dude? #like 'we all have problems. deal with them yourself and don't bring them into work cause that affects the entire team' #I guess you could call 'pull yourself together' my life motto cause I've heard that from so many people for my entire life #and as they say: if you have the same problem everywhere then you might be the problem #I guess I just have to try harder instead of whining and running away #I always sucked at running anyway #and I have an entire weekend to beat myself back into shape for the next week #haha actually I have a sword seminar and tournament on Sunday so others will do the beating up #unfortunately it's unlikely that I'll suffer any serious injuries that'll put me in hospital #but maybe breaking a few fingers would be enough for a short break? #cause with my lack of proper gloves that's not impossible #but then again I once broke my hand and it didn't count as being sick and I just kept attending my college lessons #maybe if they break all my fingers so I can't type. but that's unlikely and takes at least two hits I think

[thedreadvampy]

idk I had a very interesting therap today but I just

like it's all very well to recognise that I gotta have a fucking open-ended breakdown and jump face first into the Sadness Bog sometimes instead of sitting on all my feelings

but like

I still have to go to work, you know? it's like. ok yeah have a breakdown which like until you jump into it you don't know if it's going to last an hour or a year. yeah go ahead that's all grand. you do have to get up in the morning and go to work though. you're not allowed to not do that. or to not pay the rent or not shower or not eat.

like all my friends and loved ones are constantly like 'you know you're allowed to be sad right' and it's like. AM I??? because I STILL HAVE TO PAY RENT.

#red said #the thing my therapist keeps pointing out is like. i got on this adulthood thing WAY too early #metaphorically i have Had To Go To Work In The Morning since i was like. 4. bc i am congenitally incapable of #Not Thinking About Consequences. and it's so important to be Good and Tough and Have It Together #but like. maybe if id done more crying and melting down when i DIDN'T Have To Go To Work In The Morning bc i was a Literal Infant #i might be a more balanced adult now that i actually DO. Have To Go To Work In The Morning. #what do people like. do. when they have to have feelings but also meet adult responsibilities? impossible. gotta choose. #i think it doesn't help that i already really struggle to work a full time job. like I'm already late basically every day bc i a night guy #so it's like. there's no give in this. maybe if i was back into a 3-4 day week? but idk if i can afford that #but also the work is only partly work. it's also like. having human relationships. eating. washing. being a person. #but idk. like. until i have some genuinely open-ended time i think I'm gonna always find it impossible to actually let go #i said in therapy it's like. like sadness specifically is like a thick muddy bog. and i can dip a foot in it #but bc i know i need to be able to keep moving #i can only stick a foot in and deal with a bit of it if I'm holding onto something. so in practise i can only cry #right before it becomes inappropriate to cry. so like. end of a therapy session. heading to a train station after seeing someone. #that kind of thing. it's a safety thing. #it would be much more effectively Dealing With to go dive into the bog and plough through it #but I DON'T KNOW HOW LONG THAT'LL TAKE and i have to like. come out all muddy and deal with that #and there's always somewhere i gotta be soon. i can't just jump into the mud. not cause I'll get hurt i just Don't Have Time #anyway. feelings. how do they work. embarrassed about having them. embarrassed about suppressing them. generally just embarrassed.

[warlordfelwinter]

bat ellwood doodle bc i've just been daydreaming about the day when i finally manage to play this goddamn card game and wanted to kind of think about what they might look like

#i know the suits are different in fl so it's not hearts and clubs and etc #but. yk. i wanted some sort of card ish danglies #smaller than the other masters but still larger than a human #mostly auburn fur with black #robes of black and white and red and gold #cause it's still ellwood like they are not going to be caught dead in a boring cloak #obviously the shape is inspired by those little guys from journey #i like their lil cat ear hoods #i need to get back to ambition stuff #but i keep getting distracted by exceptional stories that trap me in a single location #currently ellwood is at the nostos hotel having very normal things happen to them #they just came from working at the royal beth where very normal things happened to them #ellwood is learning that they shouldn't go to hotels #fel's fl #oc: ellwood callan #doodles #don't ask me about the anatomy i didn't think about it #slight edit to add more wing #i'm still not going to think about how everything is attached

[sherlock-is-ace]

.

#gonna be depressing in the tags for a moment #pls excuse me #but whenevery i see a pair of friends that are like soulmates together #who laugh and scream about what they love and have so many things in common #i always become the personification of ''i want what they have'' #ever since i was a child i would pray (you heard that right lol) to get a best friend who shared my interests and passions #(and who was gay but that's included in interests and passions lol tho i didn't know it at the time) #i dream with the sitcom worthy friendships with the you get the key to my house and you can come in whenever #we just spend days sitting together and not even talking just being there #or the next best thing. find it online! #but that will never happen and i need to accept that #not even for lack of trying... i even went to a hobby class for a whole month trying to make friends irl #but it's impossible for the simplest reason... i don't enjoy it! #every time i try to do something new and out of my comfort zone i fail misserably because it's literal hell to me #how can i make a friend if i cannot talk to people? #online or whatever?! #i can't even talk to the people i know from school or whatever #i put in so much fucking effort and freak myself out! #and it's not working and it won't work and idk what to do about it! #so yeah i don't think i'm capable of having meaningful relationships actually #and i need to really accept that cause otherwise i will forever dream with it #like i need to stop trying to chase after it it's just not gonna happen #i guess people have these feelings about romantic partners? well not me lol #anyways... #angel talks #personal

[monster-noises]

Aaaaugh

I'm working on turning some pants into Jorts today, and also doing some tailoring to exsisting shorts

But fuck me if i didn't kinda Bork the tailoring on the first pair and now they're Fine but they're not Good and they're a Bit too tight and it pulls and wrinkles kinda weird but it's Fine and i'm not....

Overwhelmingly mad and in despair

But i'm fucking grumpy and trying to make myself continue is Hard

#monster noises #i've been sewing for years but i've been Good at it #cause i mean i haven't been sewing Consistently for years but even before that i always seemed to struggle where others didn't #i have to Imagine if i do it more and more often i'll get better but also idk maybe i just won't #feels like i won't #but i think that's a lie #i have deep held unhealthy belief that i frequently kinda.. forget about #that i am simply incapable of improving at things #and that's just one of those things i do not know how to either work on or how to keep picking myself up while trying to work on it and #being okay with fumbling and failing

[bblackamethystt]

Alexa, play "Drama" by aespa

#motogp #imma add my two cents in the tags but i understand you having strong feelings about your religion and church #but it's another thing to accuse folks of bastardizing it and making it seem like the poster is trying to make it seem like he doesn't #have “personality” like no said that and no one inferred that #it was a joke you didn't vibe with and that's it #and that’s okay #fabio got a sexy nun tattooed on him and that's okay. it's only about the aesethetic #not the religion #anyway lemme get off of my soap box now #fabio quartararo #damn i got a typo ***no one #update: lemme step back on my soap box cause i pretty much neglected talking about the main point. #the type of story fabio posted is stuff we see people post all the time when people are going thru the trials ans tribulations #devout religious person or not #so the poster literally said that they didnt know if he was Christian or not hence the caption and it was funny (to people) #even if they knew #it's intended to be a light hearted joke. like i see religious people do this all the time and not take themselves seriously even though #they're going through it #anyways #lemme step off my soap box AGAIN and put the same effort into my school work #***psa not saying you can't feel how you feel but don't talk to people out the side of your neck

[monstersqueen]

anyway for the rest of the concurrent soulmates-system bsd au, so kunikida has dazai's scars (and dazai has kunikida's, but that never comes up) and chuuya gets to have every lie of dazai inked on his skin (and dazai has chuuya's, but that's a whole lot less)

(i fucking love the idea that it's very obvious to dazai's soulmates that he's theirs, but they can't be sure they are his unless he lets them know)

anyway the point is that the buraiha trio can't lie to each other (literally unable to lie to each other, not lies revealed via tattoos), but only in bar lupin, only when the three of them are present - which sure has some interesting implications about what went down in dark era ! - and also ? towards the end of the break up scene ? it broke. they could have lied to each other from the end of that scene going forward, but they never got to know that.

Dazai and Ango suspect, though.

the fun part though ? another version of it came back. by which i mean that dazai tried to lie through his heartbeats - something like 'it was your fault' or another cruelty - and he couldn't. Ango doesn't realize, but he wouldn't be able to lie through coded time-stopping messages, either. they can't lie to each other anymore - but only when they're communicating via codes. secret notes that are supposed to be hidden. morse code blinks. whatever communication they use as long as it's private. simply talking to each other, even in private, doesn't count, it needs a level of secrecy.

i kinda need to to dig into it, but it fits.

#myposts #that dark era break up scene broke a lot #p sure dazai&odasaku had another bond that didn't break but did alter #while ango's bond with both of them outright broke. #and then - years later - this. it wasn't there in dark era ! it's a new thing ! #i don't know something about the intimacy the vulnerability - the trust implicit in the coded messages ? #made it so they couldn't lie to each other as long as it was communication that was never meant to be shared with anyone else #you could do somehting about how dazai choosing to let ango in his heart #(i mean. he choose to let him listen to his heartbeats #taht's pretty much the same thing) #and ango literally stopping time to help him back #caused the bond to reactivate but better protected - can't be allowed outside anywhere that's not safe #it's /just for the two of them/ #symbolically by choosing to work together they let their longing for reciprocal intimacy revive their bond #but just there. just where no one can interfer. just in coded messages #in the languages of spies and criminals - they can't lie to each other #.....anyway apparently i CAN explain why i love the idea so much #bsd march 2023 not lb #dazango

[medicinemane]

I think it's actually fairly simple to explain why no one wants to hear how exercise or sleep or staying hydrated might help with stuff like mental health

...I think that even when people are receptive to that, and it would help, that usually there's some kind of block in the way or they'd already be doing it

Could be they don't know how and need someone to teach them, could be there's some obstacle like transit in the way, or it could just be a mental block... but regardless, they might even like to do the thing but currently for one reason or another they can't

When you get met with "yeah, but just do it"... that's likely to create some hostility and unwillingness to listen

That's my thoughts anyway

#and as always; this is why I have a policy of no advice unless I'm offering some concrete assistance in making it happen #like... while sharing minimal details #had someone where I felt they could use some perspectives other than those of the people they were currently around #so I made an introduction for them; got them talking to someone who seems to have helped put them around good people #didn't just say to meet new people; offered to make an introduction; then facilitated it a little #asked the person I was introducing them to if they wouldn't mind dropping a message just so it wouldn't feel like they were being bothered #there's not a lot I can do in this world... but either I can sit with someone's discomfort #or if I think there's something to be done to make it better... I better be ready to help carry some of that burden for a little #I better also be ready to put in some work... cause I sure know how it is to want to do something but just be stuck #not just gonna offer empty dictations about what to do #if I want someone to take action I better be willing to actually offer a hand #that's how I see things anyway

[cetoddle]

i'm getting emotional just ignore me tbh

#i was rlly sad last night cause like #things are scary and i am so so scared #and i can't help but think how much easier it would be if i didn't have to keep doing everything alone #sure i have a couple friends online who can try and cheer me up and offer advice and support and stuff #but. u know. #no one's here #i don't have anyone to hold my hand or gently pat my head or take me out for ice cream when i'm so so sad and so so scared #no one to just sit with and talk with and enjoy their presence #i am always alone and it's eating me alive from the inside out #that's all #....... #but i also know that i can't stay here #there's nothing left for me here #and i don't know where the things i need are waiting #but staying here and wallowing won't help #and i have to keep being brave and even if that means doing scary things all by myself for a while longer #i just hope that i'm making the right decisions and that things will work out #and maybe eventually i'll find myself somewhere #where i don't feel quite as alone all the time.. #u know #universe please hold my hand when no one else will #i'm scared #:( #i know i sound so dramatic but. i can't help it ;-; #snow.txt