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bananxjin · 4 years

Text

Trophy Wife || 4

↦ Coworker!Seokjin x Reader

↦ WC: 8,839

↦ Drama || Angst || Fluff || Slow Burn

↦ Trigger Warnings: Swearing, Light verbal abuse

↦ Tagged: @lysannnnaa

↦ Summary: You thought you knew what you wanted – You were sure you knew what you wanted. You thought the be-all and end-all was a loving, domestic marriage with your fiance, Touru Kim; the love of your life, the future father of your children, and the man of your dreams, but things happen. Events begin to unfold, and the relationship falls apart. You see the true colors of your husband-to-be, and you realize that maybe he’s not what you built him up to be. With everything laid out in front of you, you knew the be-all and end-all was a loving, domestic marriage.

Just not with Touru.

(A/N: I’ve never been to a BT21 store, but I treated it like a mock build-a-bear in this one, okay? Just humor me.)

✨ Masterlist ✨

“How would you feel if I went back to nursing school?”

You asked meekly, peeking in from the archway at your fiance, who’s hunched over on the couch, working away on his laptop. He stops abruptly upon hearing your question. Without even looking up from the screen, he responded, “Do you even need to ask me that question? You know exactly how I feel.”

You swallowed your anxiety as he resumed typing away. You’re allowed to ask for the things that you want, and he needs to accept that. “It’s just something that was really important to me, and I’d hate to just give it up.” You sighed, walking closer with your hands clasped behind your back. “It would be beneficial to our children even if I never made a career out of it, and--”

Touru forcibly slammed his laptop shut, making the glass coffee table shudder beneath the sudden force. He stood abruptly and stalked over, towering over you with a look of intimidation in his eye. “I am not discussing this with you right before we have to attend this fucking business dinner with my father.” He hissed, emphasising the swear word. “I’ve already told you plenty of times, we are on a set path to having a financially stable family life, and when we have our children--”

He didn’t miss how you leaned away from him. Pressing your back into the archway, visibly shaken. He shut his eyes and took a deep breath before presenting to you a strained smile. “You don’t ever need to worry about working, sweetheart. I’m able to supply us with everything we’d ever need, just… Please trust me.”

It took everything in you to hold back the hurt you’re feeling; the tears of frustration from being misunderstood. It was never a question of whether or not you had to or even wanted to work. It was something that was so utterly important to you; something you felt like you had to do for your own sake, but it’s like he’s never understood that. Never cared enough to hear you out or even try to understand why it would be something that you want. Even though he was there for you after it all happened, did he just expect you to leave it all in the past?

“You’re right. I’m sorry.” You nodded, giving him a small smile. Part of you couldn’t help but blame Jin for this one. For him to instill this hope in you to go back to school and get your degree, but the other part was telling you it was your own, stupid decision to bring it up to Touru once again. You’ve known from the getgo where Touru stood. Even if it felt nice having Jin’s support, it wasn’t the support you needed to get you where you wanted to go.

Would things be different if you were marrying Jin?

You frowned at the thought. Although it’s not very fair to Touru, you still couldn’t help but wonder. You already knew Jin seemed to support you unconditionally -- For now, at least. There’s still so much about Jin that you don’t know. What if the way he acts is all a facade? He could be a completely different man behind closed doors, and you’d be none the wiser until it was too late. How could you ever compare him to Touru as a lover?

Jin is such an open book. You’re fooling yourself if you think anything about his personality is less than sincere.

You’re brought back to that lunch you had with him at the bistro. The smile he’d adorned while you sat there and gushed over Touru like he was God’s gift to you. Who are you kidding? He’s not the kind of person to hide anything from anyone. If anything, he’s the type to wear his heart on his sleeve, and you have no doubts he’s going to make a wonderful husband someday. Hell, he’s not even yours, and yet he puts you on a pedestal like he would a lover. He didn’t scorn you when you told him you enjoyed the song that seemingly annoyed him, nor did he ever brush any of your concerns off, and the way he held onto your every word…

The way he stared at your lips…

Ogled you like he was longing for your attention. Your kiss.

“What if I wanted to kiss you in here?”

You sniffled suddenly, bringing your fingertips to your cheek. When did you start crying? More importantly, why were you crying? You scolded yourself for even thinking in such a way about Jin and immediately put those thoughts to rest. Touru’s right. You knew how he felt about you going back to school; you’ve known how he’s felt from the beginning, and it’s unfair of you to try and change the path you’re already on. You should try to support him more--

“Hey!” Touru’s voice carried from down the hall, causing you to jump.

You shook your head no. “I’m fine! I’m gonna go get dressed.” And with that, you escaped the living room before Touru could make any further comments. You didn’t miss the heavy sigh when you slipped past him.

“Yeah?”

“You need to start getting ready soon. We’re leaving in an hour -- Are you crying?” His voice was tinged with annoyance when he poked his head back into the living room.

Dinner was less than uneventful. For you, anyway.

Touru and his father felt like they were miles away as they discussed the finer details of their newfound business deal, a small pile of papers and manila folders had been shoved into one of the empty chairs once the food arrived. Touru sat beside you while his parents and his sister, April sat on the opposite side of the table. Mrs. Kim was wrapped up in a conversation with her daughter. You weren’t listening too much; Mrs. Kim mentioned loving the restaurant and how she wanted to take April back to Paris with her after Christmas ended, and April seemed thrilled at the idea.

Mrs Kim made some effort to indulge you in conversation when you all had first arrived. She asked about your mother, a touchy subject seeing as how they got off to a pretty rough start. Then she asked you if you were still working, “in that fast food job you love so much”, to which you had to correct her.

“But to answer your question, I am still working there! And I’m enjoying it quite a bit!” You responded with a bubbly tone. Mrs Kim hummed and took another sip of her wine while April regarded you with a look of disgust.

Suffice to say, spending time with Touru’s family was no walk in the park. Of course, his father held no real interest in you. He saw you as nothing more than the woman on his son’s arm who would provide him a healthy family. Really, as long as you didn’t try to deflect the family business in any way, Mr. Kim had a “Positive” outlook on you.

Mrs. Kim on the other hand, was a little harder to please. She didn’t think you were a good fit for her son. Her critique has never been short of harsh, be it on what you wear, what you eat, and on the rare occasion, the way you speak. You and your mother did well with what you had after you lost your father, but for your future mother-in-law, that wasn’t enough.

She’s only ever met your mother once, when you were nineteen -- Shortly after Touru had proposed to you. You knew how she could be, but you thought it’d be nice if they met each other before the wedding. You had even hoped they could become friends, but it was all in vain.

You could almost feel your mothers thinning patience from the kitchen. “My husband died three years ago.” She sighed. “The nurses did as much as they could to help him, but--”

“You live in such a small house! Does your husband not provide much of an income?” She wondered aloud.

“What about your husband’s health insurance? His life insurance? None of his expenses could’ve been covered under those?”

“The nurses?” Mrs. Kim spat, “Do you mean those Mediheal government nurses?”

Your mom hesitated, “Yes. That’s all we could afford.”

“His work didn’t offer him any of that. We got by with what we could, but it wasn’t enough.”

When you came back just seconds later with fresh tea, you could tell by the look on your mother's face she really didn’t appreciate Mrs. Kim standing in her house, much less the attitude she’d been met with, but she bit her tongue and suffered through it. For you.

The tension only got worse as the night went on. You were standing in the kitchen making dinner when you heard the telltale screech of your mother's temper.

“Excuse me, Mrs. Money Bags! But aside from money, what can your son provide for my daughter?!” She demanded. “Is he going to make her happy? Is he going to be good to her?! Money and family be damned! How can I expect him to be a good father to my grandchildren if he can’t even be a good husband to my daughter?”

“How dare you speak to me like that!”

You nearly dropped the hot pot on the floor as you set it down to rush back into the living room. Touru tried to defend himself, telling your mother, “I love your daughter, how can you say that about me?!” but Mrs. Kim had shoved him away, telling him to stay out of it. You did your best to defuse the situation, trying to make things right again, but the damage had been done.

Mrs. Kim had all but dragged Touru out of your house, slamming the door behind her. Your mom was fuming, fists clenched at her sides. “Mom--”

“I will not stand for you to marry into that family! That woman is a walking nightmare if I’ve ever seen one!” She yelled, stomping into the kitchen. You followed her, speaking quickly to try and calm her down, but there was nothing you could say to make the situation right.

“Do you even know what she said about you?!” She screeched, “What she said about my daughter?! My pride and joy?!” Tears brimmed at her eyes. “I heard her, (Y/n). Heard her with my own two ears! She had the audacity to ask that son of hers if he was sure about you! How you can’t give him anything aside from children!”

You felt tears brimming your own eyes. Not so much at her comments, but the fact that it had hurt your mom so badly to hear this stranger talk like that about her offspring. “Mom, it’s not a big deal. I don’t care what Mrs. Kim thinks about me--”

“Well I do!” She screamed. “You just expect me to sit back and listen to that -- That bitch talk about my daughter like she’s nothing?! Nothing more than a machine that bears babies for her ungrateful prick of a son!?”

It had only been the tip of the iceberg. You thought things would get better as time went on, but the rift in your relationship with your mom only grew bigger, and your relationship with Mrs. Kim never grew any stronger.

Finally, there was April. Touru’s little sister. God, when you met her, you did everything you possibly could to be good to her. Everything in hopes of becoming her friend, but she vehemently disregarded your every attempt through and through.

You practically begged Touru to let you attend her high school graduation last year. You bought her a giant teddy bear with her graduation year eloquently knitted into the belly and a graduation cap on his head, and you bought a big bouquet of red roses to tuck between his arms.

You stood off to the sidelines with the rest of the families absolutely overjoyed, filled to the brim with excitement. You grew up an only child, so you never really got to celebrate anything like graduations or birthdays with anyone aside from friends. Of course, all of your friends graduated the same year as you, so you were more than happy to celebrate April’s with her.

April had walked up to you and the rest of her family with a small smile on her face as her parents pulled her into a loving hug, giving her praise and congratulating her. She turned to you, looking a little less enthusiastic until you held the gift out to her. “Congratulations on your big day!” You yelled with excitement.

And for the first time, it felt like she actually gave you a real, genuine smile. Pulling the bear close to her and pulling the roses from his arms so she could sniff him. “Oh. Thank you, (Y/n).” She responded softly. “You… You really didn’t have to do this.”

“But I wanted to!” You responded. “This is a big deal for you, and I wanted to be here to support you!” You couldn’t help yourself as you pulled her into a hug. She stiffened underneath you, but at least attempted to hug you back. She was still smiling at you even after you pulled away. You really felt hopeful that your guy's relationship would actually improve.

The family had dinner reservations after the graduation, but they had to wait just a little longer since you needed to use the bathroom before you guys left. As you were heading out of the school to meet Touru in his car, you found the graduation bear, haphazardly stuffed in one of the garbage cans, and the roses had been dropped on the ground. It stung, but you never brought it up to her, or Touru. Hell, he probably watched her do it.

You frowned at the realization that you’ve never been able to really hit it off with Touru’s family. You wondered to yourself if they’d ever welcome you. You didn’t expect them to treat you like a daughter-in-law, or even a friend! Just treat you with some respect, was that asking for too much?

Jin’s family probably isn’t even half as rude as Touru’s family.

You took another sip of your wine as your thoughts were overrun with your coworker. You wondered what he’s doing; if he’s enjoying his evening. Perhaps he’s actually on a date tonight. Or maybe he’s just spending his night alone at that bar…

What if he met someone at that bar? What if he took her home?

You visibly cringe as thoughts of him with another woman crossed your mind. Luckily, everybody’s so wrapped up in their own conversations that they didn’t seem to have noticed your awkward movements, or the way you’re living in your head when you should probably at least try to socialize with the family.

You rolled your eyes to yourself. They don’t want to talk to you, you think. Jin would want to talk to you if he were here. He’d be sitting across from you like he was at the bistro, gazing at you with those warm, brown eyes. Telling you stories of his childhood and trying to take peeks into your personal life, or whatever you’d offer him.

You’re overcome with a tingly feeling in your hands; in your lips. This place is so much fancier than that bistro. If Jin were here with you, it would actually be a date; nothing platonic about it. You couldn’t help but wonder what Jin would look like all dressed up. Sure, he dressed nice for work, but nothing fancy. Something you couldn’t fathom Jin doing.

The idea of him wearing a tuxedo? Or even just a nice white button up while sitting across from you with those hooded eyes and million dollar smile -- All of that just for you. The very thought alone sent a wave of heat over your whole body. He’d be all dressed up to take you out on a date like this. Instead of a table, he’d probably opt for the more private intimacy of a booth. Halfway through the dinner, he’d move to the other side so he could sit beside you. Running his hand up your bare thigh and pressing liquor infused kisses to your neck. Afterwards, he’d drive you back to his place where the two of you can be alone. Where he can trap your chin between his fingers like he did that one night. Maybe pin you against the wall, and--

Oh, god! What’s wrong with you?!

You took another, long sip of your drink. Rubbing your thighs together in a failed attempt at calming yourself down. You must really be losing it lately. Either that, or you’re just severely touch-starved. Fantasizing about your friend taking you while you’re sitting at a nice dinner with your fiance's family?

It’s his fault, you thought to yourself. What right did he have putting these thoughts in your head? None of this would’ve happened if he hadn’t teased you in the stockroom like he did. You’d love nothing more than to put that memory to rest, but you just couldn’t. The way his hand caressed your hip, or how he eyed your lips like they were his last meal. Neither of you have brought it up since, but you can’t escape it. It keeps you up at night. Everytime you close your eyes, all you can see are those pink lips. All you can hear is his ragged breathing, and his voice whispering, “What if I wanted to kiss you in here?” Deep, husky, and right in your ear.

Asshole.

You wondered if he really wanted to kiss you, or if he was just taking the piss. Something that you’ve been more and more curious about, however…

‘How do I feel about it? Am I developing feelings for Jin?’

Even now, spending an evening with your lover and his family -- Weren’t you supposed to be enjoying this time together? You’ve racked your brain time and time again, and no matter how you looked at it, you couldn’t find a single thing to be happy about tonight. Not the food, nor the company. In fact, any dinner or outing you’ve ever been to with Touru’s family has been downright uncomfortable.

No matter how much you didn’t want to admit it to yourself, you found yourself desperately missing Jin’s company. Missing his dumb puns, or the way he’d danced outside the cafe. Even remembering the way he smiled down at you when you restrained him…

His stupid smile.

‘Have I really been harboring feelings for him this whole time?’

You’re so caught up in your own thoughts that it took you a moment to register the messy head of black hair up by the bar. He’s turned away from you, clearly talking to one of the bartenders and fidgeting with the tie on his apron, but that hair… Those broad shoulders…

No, your mind screamed. That can’t possibly…

That is not the one person you’re missing right now. Not now.

Slowly inhaling through your nose and exhaling from your mouth, you pulled your phone out with a shaky grip, but for what? A distraction? A confrontation perhaps?

You considered texting Dahyun for help, but what’s she supposed to do for you? You’re nearly two hours away from home and you don’t know where you’re at. You can’t even say the dumb French restaurants name, let alone spell it out.

Maybe you should confront Jin. Just shoot him a simple text asking him where he’s at; what he’s doing. It’s not like you’ve been thinking about him for the last twenty minutes. You could even play it off like, “Hey! Just saw your doppelganger at this restaurant! Crazy, right?”

He nodded, taking her glass. “Certainly, milady.” He gave a short bow and hurried off to the bar. You stole a quick glance at Touru, but thankfully he didn’t seem to have noticed Jin. Not that he’d recognize him. Or at least, you hoped he wouldn’t. Not like this.

“Could I get you a fresh drink, Mademoiselle?”

You flinched, glaring up at the man with the shitty faux French accent. It did nothing to ward off Jin’s fat grin staring you back in the face. “Ooh! I need a refill!” April chimed in, holding her glass up to Jin. “Château Lafite, please.”

“Wow, they really do hire some of the most handsome men here, don’t they?” April giggled to her mother. “I didn’t see a wedding ring on his finger! Maybe you should get his number.” Mrs. Kim responded in a hushed tone which only made April giggle more. You let their conversation roll off you. Hell, you could hardly be bothered to pay attention to anything other than Jin now that you knew he was here.

Wait… Jin is here.

Why is he here?!

His eye caught yours as he was making a mixed drink. He smiled and gave you a wink. You sucked in a quick breath, trying to subtly shake your head at him, but he’s already on his way back over before you could get the message across.

“Here you go, ma’am!” He set the wine down in front of April before turning back to you. “And for the pretty lady. Mon Coeur.” He purred, bringing back the faux accent.

You didn’t miss the odd look April gave you upon hearing Jin’s comment, but you couldn’t be bothered to acknowledge her, instead giving Jin a strained smile, hoping he takes the hint.

“You told me to surprise you, yes?” He chuckled, playing it off effortlessly. “You look like someone who enjoys the sweeter things in life, so I made you this drink. It’s a mix of peach vodka, grenadine, lime soda, ice,” He counted the ingredients using his fingers, “And fresh peaches of course.” He purred with a wink before setting a paper napkin down beside your drink.

You took a slow sip of the pretty pink drink, your senses were immediately overcome with the sweetness exploding over your tastebuds. It sent a tingle down your spine, and you did your best to confine your smile from any prying eyes. One thing’s for sure, Jin knew your tastes when it came to alcohol.

You stiffly nodded. “Thank you, sir.”

“If you need anything else, please let me know.” He gave a final nod to the rest of the family before hurrying back to the bar.

You used the napkin to wipe the corners of your mouth before you noticed a message on the underside.

“Meet me by the bathrooms in 15.”

You cleared your throat and folded the napkin in half, discreetly slipping it into your bag before taking another sip of your drink. “Wow. That waiter sure seemed awfully friendly with you, (Y/n).” Mrs. Kim noted in a snarky, loud tone. She gave her son the side eye, but Touru didn’t seem the least bit interested, too wrapped up in whatever story his father’s been sharing.

“It sure would seem that way. He gave her his heart after all.” April bit, motioning towards the drink in your hand. The words barely registered as you glanced down at the pink liquid in your cup.

His…

His heart?

You felt almost clueless sitting amongst them, listening to them talk about you like they’ve seen it all before. “I-it’s just a drink. I really don’t think it means anything…” You stuttered, trying to keep your poised posture. “Do you think they know each other?” Mrs. Kim spoke in a hushed tone. Her words immediately sent another chill down your spine. You couldn’t help glancing over at Touru, but still. Nothing.

“Maybe, but she isn’t nearly pretty enough for him.” April muttered against the lip of her glass, giving you a look as if to say, ‘Go on. Challenge me.’. Mrs. Kim giggled and playfully smacked her daughters arm, both of them acting as if their words were lost among the chatter. You swallowed your pride and played along, reminding yourself that their words shouldn’t mean anything to you.

You kept a close eye on the time, pushing the measly pieces of shrimp around on your salad and taking small sips of your drink every now and again. You were vibrating with anticipation as you took another peek at the large clock just across the room. It truly was the longest fifteen minutes you’d ever sat through, until finally…

You were good to go.

You barely tapped Touru on the leg murmuring, “I’m going to the bathroom, I’ll be right back.” Touru nodded and took your hand in his to give it a chaste kiss before indulging his father again. You made your way towards the back of the restaurant where you saw the bathroom signs -- Where you knew you’d be out of the family’s line of sight.

Sure enough, You saw that tall idiot leaning against the wall playing on his phone, dressed to the nines in black slacks, a deep maroon apron tied neatly around his waist, and to top it all off, a white button up with a silk black vest clinging deliciously to his abdomen.

Well, looks like you got part of your wish.

He smiled almost immediately when he looked up at you. “Hey, beautiful! I wasn’t sure if you were actually gonna do it--”

“Shut it!” You hissed, swatting at his arm with the back of your hand. “What the hell are you doing here?!”

Jin gestured to his outfit, giving you his best customer service smile. “What does it look like I’m doing here?” He laughed, his response sounding more like a statement rather than a question. “I work here on Friday and Saturday evenings for a little extra cash. Not to mention, having the bartending experience is a plus.” He winked.

“Oh, speaking of! How was your drink?” His eyes widened, filled to the brim with child-like wonder as he asked. “I made it myself, so your feedback is crucial right now.”

He’s your friend. Not your lover.

You sighed, “Jin, I didn’t come over here to make jokes with you--”

“Oh no, it’s not a joke! I really do wanna know! I put my heart and soul into that drink.” He winked again. “I guess in a way, you could say I gave you my heart.” He added with a sly smile. You could feel his words churning within as they settled at the bottom of your stomach. Is that what April meant?

“Will you quit flirting?” You sighed, “Seriously. I’m supposed to be having a nice dinner with Touru’s family, and--”

“Oh yeah, ‘cos you looked like you were just having the time of your life with those people.” He sneered, rolling his eyes for added effect. “I’ve been here all evening, (Y/n). I could tell from the moment you walked through the door that you were miserable.” His voice soft again as he took a step closer to you to rest his hand on your shoulder. You made a half attempt at shaking him off, but his palm only slipped down your bare bicep. You shivered, feeling the touch of his warmth against your cool skin.

“How about we blow this popsicle stand and go get sushi or something, yeah?” He asked with a small smile. “Or I can head back over to lover boy’s family and strike up a conversation.” He suggested, pulling his hand away from you so he could make exaggerated gestures, “Maybe flirt with Touru’s fiance in front of him a little more; see how far I can push my luck before he pummels my ass.” He laughed, causing you to smack his arm a few more times.

He smiled mischievously. “Well I suppose if you’re in the mood to do something for me, I guess can make myself disappear for the night.”

“Will you quit it?! You may think it’s funny, but I’ll have to deal with his pissy mood.” You hissed.

“Ooh, you’ll have to--”

“Seriously, Jin.”

You knit your eyebrows at him, taken aback by his suggestion. “Excuse you?”

You rolled your eyes. “Fine, whatever. I’ll help you move. But I really need to get back now before they get suspicious.” You sighed, checking your phone real quick to make sure Touru hasn’t already sent a slew of messages.

“It’s nothing like that! Just a little favor for a friend.”

You glared at him for a moment, “Are you making me buy your silence?”

Jin shrugged. “I’m not making you do anything. But if you’re not willing to do a little something for me -- Say, helping me move into my new apartment next month,” He winked, “Then I’ll be more than happy to liven up your evening. Just a little bit.”

“Awe, but you just got here.” Jin whined. Even going as far to jut his bottom lip out in an adorable little pout. It only annoyed you more. Not in a, ‘You get on my nerves’ way, but more like, ‘Why do you have to be this cute?’ Kind of way.

If this were an old time cartoon, this would probably be the part where steam started streaming out of your ears. You puffed your cheeks out and clenched and unclenched your fists a couple of times before smiling up at him. “I’ll see you later, Jin.”

“Yeah, but I’m not here to hang out with you--”

“You say that, but you did leave your fiance to come back here to meet me.” He teased with a suggestive smile. “Surely that means you wanted to see me at least a little bit, no?”

He frowned as you turned away, but he knew he could only keep you with him for so long. “Fine, I understand… Oh, and (Y/n)...” Jin grasped your hand before you could run away. “I’m just a text away if you need anything. I’m always here for you.”

You licked your lips, letting his hand linger in yours a lot longer than it needed to. You wanted nothing more than to clasp your fingers around his. You could still change your mind; you could still turn around and run away with him. Fuck the business dinner, Jin just offered to buy you sushi, and you were really going to turn that down?

You sighed as your rational thought won out. You gently pulled your hand away, and gave him one last smile over your shoulder. “I know. Thank you, Jin.”

You smoothed out your black midi dress several times, clueless as to what your hands should be doing. You clasped them in front of you for a moment until your fingers delicately wrapped around the hand he’d just held, though you weren’t sure why. Your hands weren’t as big as his. They surely weren’t as warm. You were already regretting your decision as Touru and his family were finally in your crosshairs again.

Best friend. Not your lover.

Despite the fancy music and the families chattering around you, all you could hear was the click clacking of your heels as if the sound had made it’s home at the base of your eardrums. Great. Another lie. Another reason why Touru shouldn’t trust you. How many more lies would you have to tell before Touru found out?

You sat back in your seat once again, subtly wiping your palms on your dress. Although it was sweat you were wiping off, you supposed Touru nor his family would know any better. “Is everything okay?” He asked suddenly, placing his hand upon yours.

Where Jin held your hand…

You gave him your best smile as you nodded at him. “Yeah. Uhm, Yuna called while I was in the bathroom.” You coughed. “She needs help moving, and I agreed to help her.”

Touru narrowed his eyes at you, slowly pulling his hand away from yours. “When? You know I rescheduled those venue showings for February, so if that’s the case--”

“She said she’ll get back to me with the date.” You stuttered, conjuring up a new story. “She’s narrowed her options down, but... She’s not closing until after Christmas.”

Dammit, Jin.

You looked back at Touru, his jaw set tight. The look in his eyes already told you you’d be in for a long night once this was all over. You took a deep breath and turned back to your food without another word. Even Mrs. Kim had been giving you a stern look over the brim of her champagne glass, clearly catching onto the tension between you and her son. April seemed to be the only one who didn’t notice or at the very least, didn’t want to be involved in the newfound family drama.

“Okay…” Touru replied suspiciously. “Well if it’s in February--”

“I already know it can’t be in February.” You snapped. Mr. Kim loudly cleared his throat and his cutlery scraped across his plate, causing you and Touru both to glance over at him. He gave you both a look as if to say, ‘Don’t embarrass me.’

You glared at the dry erase calendar set up directly above the weekly schedule. “Happy birthday, Jin!” Was scrawled in ugly bright green letters on the fourth day of December. Your fingers twitched at the thought of reaching up and erasing the note. Itching to erase his name and replace it with “asshole”. Anything to show your frustration with him. The last two days had been hell to get through, no thanks to Jin and his stupid moving nonsense.

What was that about anyway? Manipulating you into helping him move?

Thinking back on it, you could’ve just told him no. He could’ve made an ass of himself in front of Touru and his family, but…

Touru said he saw you and Jin goofing off at work, but that doesn’t necessarily mean he knows what Jin looks like; doesn’t mean he could easily pick Jin out of a line-up of the men you work with, right? So would he have noticed him if you’d decided to call his bluff?

You took a deep breath, trying to reel your thoughts back in before you would have to start your shift. You reminded yourself that you couldn’t put all the blame on Jin. Although it was a poor decision on his part to bargain with you -- Manipulate you into helping him, it was still your decision to go see him. All because you missed him. Missed his company.

You could always just back out, you thought to yourself. The dinner is over with; Jin could never follow through with his little charade now. What are the odds of him ever seeing Touru again? Not like he would do anything anyway. He’s too kind, too honest, too compassionate to ever--

Then it occurred to you. He never would’ve created a scene in front of Touru’s family. He never would’ve humiliated you or himself because he cared.

When are you going to figure out that he only says these things to get a reaction out of you?

You sighed. You’re not going to back out of the deal. You cared about Jin, too and you wanted to be there for him.

So what about his birthday?

“What are you sighing so dramatically about?”

The faint whisper against the shell of your ear startled you, causing you to turn around way too quickly and bumping right into Jin’s chest. His hands naturally jutted out to grab your hips, steadying you before he bursted out into laughter. “Jesus christ, Jin. I hate it when you sneak up on me like that.”

“I couldn’t help it. You seemed so distressed over here, I thought I’d come over and try to help.” He explained, releasing his hold on you so he could flick through the clothes in the dressing room, going about his normal routine as if everything were just fine.

“How’d dinner go the other night?” He asked casually. You frowned as you scooted by Jin so you could load some of the clothes onto your arm. “It was fine, I guess.” You shrugged. “Touru got mad at me…” You whispered, though you weren’t even sure if you wanted Jin to hear you.

“Wait, did he really?” He stopped suddenly, looking at you in complete shock. You gave him a small nod. “I mean I didn’t tell him I was helping you move, I told him it was for another friend. Oh by the way, as far as anyone is concerned, you’re not closing until after Christmas.”

“What? Oh…” His cheeks dusted pink. “Yeah. I mean that’s pretty close anyway. I’m closing December twenty first, but I can’t move in until January fifth.”

“I’ll make sure to mark it on my calendar then!” You chirped, heading over to the Women’s section. Jin was right on your heel, grabbing his own armful of clothes on the way out. “Wait, wait (Y/n) I’m really sorry. It wasn’t my intention to start a fight between you and Touru--”

“Hey, hey. Don’t worry about it, okay?” You responded nonchalantly as possible, “Touru… He’s easy to set off. If things aren’t going his way, then it gets under his skin. It’s nothing we haven’t been through before.”

Jin’s silent as you two go about putting clothes away in the Women's area. You bumped shoulders a couple times, half expecting Jin to make a joke or start up a new conversation, but now he seemed to be the one that was distraught.

“Even if it hadn’t been you -- If it had really been Yuna or Dahyun; anyone! He would’ve been upset.” You explained softly. “It’s a wrench thrown into our plans, and the beginning of the year is always really hard on him because of his position--”

“(Y/n)...”

“Jin, I’m serious.” You replied firmly, grabbing him by the biceps once you two were in the confines of the dressing room once again. It was a slow night with light foot traffic, so you and Jin could take it easy. You could actually take the time to have a conversation with him like this.

“Then maybe you shouldn’t--”

“But I said I would!” You whined. “Seriously, Jin. It’s no biggie. All I ask is that I be out of your place by four that day.” You replied firmly. “Touru usually gets home around six, so I’ll need to leave a little early. You know, for dinner and all.”

Jin frowned, but nodded in agreement anyway. “Fine. But if you can’t do it for any reason, just let me know?” He pleaded.

“Of course.”

You spent the next few days brooding over whether or not you should do something for Jin’s birthday. Anything at all.

You always went out of your way to buy birthday presents for your friends or have little surprise parties for them. Hell, even just taking them out to dinner! Just something to show that you cared.

It was much more difficult with Jin. Partially because you couldn’t find it in yourself to create another story for Touru. “Oh, I’m going to a friend's birthday dinner! I’ll be back later!” He knows most of your friends birthdays, so it’s not like he’d fall for it anyway. But on top of that, you couldn’t stop overthinking the whole ordeal.

What were you supposed to buy for a man in his mid-twenties on his birthday? New clothes? Candy? An air freshener? Who knows! Certainly not you! It’s not like you’ve had to worry about this with Touru. He doesn’t like presents, and instead prefers dinner and/or birthday sex -- Assuming he’s not busy. Birthday dinner or not, he wants birthday sex every year.

You blushed, knowing Touru’s birthday ideals were not going to cut it for your friend and coworker. You decided to stop by one of the little corner shops after work Monday evening. Maybe just a basket of goodies would suffice? With lots of sweets and treats? Ah, but that feels like a cop out; disingenuous, and even if Jin would probably settle for something like that, you would not.

On Tuesday, you were fortunate enough to have the day off, so out shopping you went! Unfortunately, there was only one car to split between you and Touru, and he always took that car to work -- Including today, so you were left to walk to places nearby or take the train into town.

You spent much of your morning in search of a gift in the local shops, but you really couldn’t find anything of interest. You were beginning to panic as you were quickly running out of time, and so by the early afternoon, you found yourself at the mall. Weaving your way in and out of shops, even asking shop clerks what they think a man Jin’s age would want. Many of them offered you some pretty good ideas, but nothing you hadn’t already considered yourself. You wound up at home empty handed.

Wednesday afternoon, and you were working alongside Kyla. You were really starting to lose the birthday spirit as you subtly perused your own shop's shelves, desperately searching for something Jin would like, however the idea of giving him something that obviously came from work seemed like another lazy attempt at a decent birthday gift, so you quickly put that idea to rest. You even asked Kyla what she was getting Jin for his birthday, but that ended up being useless as she simply shrugged and replied, “We don’t really get each other gifts. I just sign the company birthday card with a nice note, and he’s pretty satisfied with that.”

You did sign the company birthday card, but that still wasn’t enough for you.

Your shift ended. You were dragging your feet along the pavement as you made your way to the train station. You really couldn’t find one birthday gift for him? Maybe you should just take the easy route and make a goodie basket. Sure you won’t be satisfied giving him such a low-brow present, but he’ll probably be satisfied, and shouldn’t that be enough for you?

“Mommy! Look! The new toy line is out!”

You turned towards the child on the other side of the street, desperately pulling her mother into a toy shop. You smiled and jogged over to take a peek in the window. You saw all kinds of little plushies and big plushies of different animals, cartoon characters, and video game characters. Even some characters from trendy overseas shows that you’re not as familiar with.

Then you spotted the new toy line the little girl must’ve been so excited about. The shop had a grand display for eight new characters featuring a smiling alpaca, a mischievous looking cookie, a blue koala, a horse -- Which clearly wasn’t a horse -- A puppy in a yellow suit, an alien-looking creature with a giant heart for a head, and a bright pink bunny rabbit all perched on top of one more alien-looking creature with a deadpan face. Somehow, he looked weirdly protective of the other seven creatures sitting on top of him.

“What a strange and unusual group of characters…” You muttered to yourself, observing them with a quirked eyebrow and a gloved hand to your chin. Jin hadn’t breathed a word of liking anything like this, so why were you considering it?

You glanced down at the price. Oof. The whole set was just a little out of your price-range, but perhaps just one of them…

The blinking pink sign on the window showed that they’d be closing in less than an hour, so without another minute to waste, you rushed into the toy shop.

It wasn’t difficult to pick out the display for the new toy brand. A tall, eight tier tower stood in the middle aisle. Each tier dedicated to its own respective character, and they came in all different sizes. The plushies that wouldn’t fit on the tiers -- Which were a little bigger than the size of an average body pillow -- Sat on the floor just beneath the tower. Only one of each character sat on the floor, but you assumed it was due to their size, and not their stock.

You walked around the tower once. Twice. Three times, quietly observing the plushies. You were in awe of how adorable they were up close and how beautiful the designs were. Even the fabric felt plush like the people who worked on these toys really put a lot of love and care into them. No wonder they were so expensive. You almost considered being selfish enough to buy one for yourself, but you knew Touru would have questions if you brought a stuffed animal home.

Which one would suit Jin the best…

Despite how much you enjoyed looking at some of the other plushies, you kept coming back to the white alpaca, absolutely in awe of how much he reminded you of Jin. And so you decided it would be the white alpaca. Nothing too big; one with enough stuffing to cuddle at night. On the far wall opposite of the tower, you saw they had a small line of outfits offered for the respective characters. You smiled, picking out a fluffy pink parka and a red beanie to match. You also bought a pretty birthday bag and some tissue paper so the plushie could be properly packed tomorrow.

Thursday evening, and it was nearly time to go. With it being so close to the holidays, Touru was as busy as ever. He sent you a text on his lunch, letting you know he wouldn’t be home until midnight, so you’d be taking the train home tonight despite the chilling air and how late you’d be getting home.

You worked almost nine hours alongside Jin. Once he was sure Jin was on a walkie, Namjoon immediately made a big deal out of today being Jin’s birthday. Immediately, a slew of happy birthdays came flowing through the ear piece, making you smile. You glanced over at Jin who was just on the other side of Men’s basics, setting out new Christmas stock. He was radio silent, but he wore the biggest grin you’d ever witnessed on a man, his cheeks and even the tips of his ears were flushed bright pink from the sudden attention.

“Ah! Thank you so much, guys!” He giggled over the radio, and you couldn’t help but giggle with him. He was so embarrassed yet so touched. It was an endearing sight, one that you never wanted to forget.

After closing, you fell behind everyone else as they were walking out of the store, making an effort to hide the bag behind your back as you followed suit. As your coworkers dispersed, you caught the broad-shouldered man by his arm before he could reach his car.

“Hey!” You exclaimed, giving him a gentle tug. He turned immediately, shocked at first then happy to see who it was that had stopped him. “Hey yourself! What can I do ya for?” He asked in his usual dorky tone. Then he noticed you had your hands tucked behind your back. “What do you have behind your back?” He smirked.

You shivered a bit as it began to snow, cheeks tinted pink as he pointed out the obvious gift, but you hoped he’d write it off as you being cold. You considered running away from the embarrassing situation until you saw a little snowflake land on his nose. The way he wiggled his nose cutely at the featherlight touch was almost too much for your heart.

Kiss it. Kiss the snowflake off his nose, you coward.

All thoughts had escaped you. With all the grace of a shy five year old, you shoved the bag into Jin’s chest. “Here.” You breathed through parted lips before taking a small step back. “Happy birthday! I’m sorry, I feel like it’s not much.” You chastised yourself as Jin pulled the alpaca out from under the tissue paper.

His eyes widened in awe as he stared at the adorable plushie in his hand. Truthfully, he’s always loved cute stuff like this, and he was so excited for the BT21 Collection to be released, but funds were tight right now, especially with him wanting to get his own place, so he figured he could do without it.

“I wasn’t really sure what I should’ve gotten you, and believe me, I looked!” You rambled, finally drawing Jin’s eyes away from his new son. “I really wanted to get something that you could use, or something that would be meaningful to you somehow, ya know?”

He gazed at you silently while you looked at everything but him. If only you’d look up, you’d see how his eyes were filled with nothing but adoration for you. “I wanted to get you a goodie basket, but that didn’t feel good enough. Then I asked Kyla what she got you, but she said it’d be fine if I just signed the company birthday card, and I--!”

Your rambling came to a sudden halt when Jin tugged you into his chest, leaning over to encase you in his warm, snug embrace. You’re stunned into silence, gaze wavering for a moment before you slowly wrapped your arms around him to hug him back.

“I love it; he’s so adorable. Thank you.” He whispered. You could even feel the alpaca gently pressed against the back of your head from his hand placement. You smiled and rubbed his back before trying to pull away, but he only held on tighter. “I’m sorry,” He apologized in a husky voice, “can you give me a minute? I really just… Need to hold someone right now.”

Hesitant at first, but you’re wrapping your arms around him again in no time. Your face was buried in his black coat as you held him tighter than you had before. Jin did the same, resting his chin on your shoulder at first, then burying his face somewhere between your hair and your scarf. Softly, slowly you stroked your hand up and down his back, silently deciding you’d hold him as long as he needed you to. His soft sniffle was muffled by wool and hair. It was only more incentive for you to give him a gentle squeeze, reminding him you were there for him.

You came to the realization that there’s a lot you still don’t know about Jin, and there’s still a lot he doesn’t know about you. Things you’ve hidden from him to protect him -- To protect yourself. It only makes you wonder what untold secrets he’s been hiding from you. If he was trying to protect you from his own monsters.

Holding each other like this, no matter how comforting it might feel, it was also painful. Heartbreaking. You didn’t ever want it to end. Even if that meant you and him had to stand out in the freezing cold, buried under ten feet of snow for the rest of your days, you’d gladly accept that fate. As long as you’re with Jin, you felt like you could get through anything.

As long as he’s by your side…

You squeezed your eyes shut and willed those thoughts away. You weren’t ready to face those feelings yet. You knew you couldn’t act on them, and that’s what hurt the worst. You weren’t in too deep yet. You still had just enough time and dignity to pull yourself out of this little hole you’d dug for yourself inside of Jin’s heart, but you weren't ready. Not yet.

One day, you would have to let him go. One day, you’re going to say goodbye to Jin, and it’ll be the last time; you’ll never see him again, never hear his voice again. It was physically painful trying to imagine your life without him. Painful enough to create that lump in your throat, and tears in your eyes.

Not yet…

You squeezed him again, this time for your own sake instead of his. Reminding yourself that he’s still here with you.

It’ll happen. You’ll lose Jin in due time, but until that day comes, you would comfortably continue to enjoy Jin just like this. Little moments where the two of you needed each other. Not for anything in particular, just to be there for each other. For comfort and reassurance. Something both of you had been seeking for a long time.

You continued stroking Jin’s back as he rubbed his face against your scarf, both of you reveling in each other’s warm embrace until he started to loosen up a bit. Then letting go altogether. “Ah, I’m really sorry about that. I think I just really needed a hug!” He giggled, holding his new alpaca close to his chest. You couldn’t help the smile that spread across your face.

“C’mon, I’m not letting you walk in this cold by yourself. I’ll give you a ride home.”

“Okay.”

23 notes · View notes

ethadcl1 · 6 years

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For sale in Shawnee: A regal mansion built next to a landfill | The Kansas City Star

The “for sale” sign goes up this week on what experts say may be the priciest home ever put on the Kansas City housing market.

Sitting on more than 100 wooded acres in the hills of western Shawnee, the two-level, 13,000-square-foot mansion was the last residence of the late Kansas City trash collection titan Ron Deffenbaugh.

Beneath the 24-foot ceiling in the great room is a built-in saltwater aquarium, the enclosed service area behind it as big as a studio apartment.

Downstairs, the home theater features a 120-square-foot screen behind red velvet curtains like you might find at an art house.

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Outside the 5-year-old, five-bedroom house are waterfalls and fountains, an indoor-outdoor swimming pool and, within easy trotting distance, horse stables.

“You’re kind of in a kingdom unto yourself,” real estate sales agent Teresa Dunn said with a dreamy smile as she led a private tour last week.

Ah, but not everyone who can afford the $14 million asking price will think the neighborhood all that royal.

The RD Ranch, as it is known officially, sits directly across the street from the fetid receptacle for much of the garbage collected in the Kansas City area: the Johnson County Landfill. It was the centerpiece of the empire Deffenbaugh once owned.

About 1.8 million tons of household waste and other garbage is dumped there each year, by far more than any other waste-handling facility in the region.

Technology controls the stink most of the time. But last year, the city of Shawnee fielded 41 odor complaints on 35 different days. You can’t see the landfill from the Deffenbaugh house, but at times you can smell it.

“It depends on how bad the weather is,” said Bruce Bird, the Deffenbaugh ranch’s next-door neighbor to the west. “You get some evenings when it’s calm and it’s pretty rank.”

Not rank enough to have dissuaded Deffenbaugh from setting up housekeeping there. For the last few years of his life, using a wheelchair and tended to by a staff of dozens, he was right where he wanted to be until his death last August at age 73.

“To him, this property had special meaning,” said longtime associate Mark Rosenau, who now leads a firm solely devoted to managing the Deffenbaugh estate.

Special meaning or not, in the real estate business, where “location, location, location” are said to be the three most important words in making a sale, the ranch’s proximity to the dump could be a turnoff to potential buyers.

“Oh my, that’s challenging,” said Susan Fate, who specializes in selling high-end properties for ReeceNichols. “I would venture to guess that’s probably going to sit for a while.”