Tumgik
#cause i love you all sm💕
7000f1 · 1 year
Text
I just remembered how I once went to twt and finally said that Jyushi would probably be a monster hunter enthusiast and then like, 2 weeks later or so ARB announced the monster hunter subjugation event
#I voice my thoughts and then hypmic delivers it's nuts#also that event 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭💕💕💕💕💕💕💕💕#okay I'm going to ramble here I am chatty today#OKAY SO Jyushi stating that he was waiting for so long for the new monsub game and getting his hands on it as soon as it's released#also that's ma boy!!!! buying a physical copy!!!!#and he then thinks he hopes Kuko doesn't show up like last time so he can play AND THEN KUKO APPEARS#so Jyushi runs away like NOOOOOOO NOTHING'S HAPPENING BYEEEEEEE#JYUSHI BEING A LANCE USER I HAVE SO MUCH RESPECT I'VE NEVER BEEN ABLE TO USE LANCES#Jyushi being yeeted by a monster is such a mood#AND FAST FORWARD TO KUKO BREAKING INTO HIS ROOM#CAUSE HE WAS DEAD WORRIED SOMETHING HAPPENED LIKE 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 SUCH A SWEETHEART#and when Jyushi apologizes Kuko then says that the punishment is to play together#hold up give me a second I'm crying#that makes me so incredibly happy 😭😭😭😭😭💕💕💕💕💕 them both playing monhun- ahem monsub together and probably laughing#MY POOR HEART I LOVE THEM SM#do you think they try to get Hitoya to play too sometime? I do#they all would have so much fun together even if Hitoya thinks he won't enjoy it at first cause why does he have to play#just like that let's play! arb card in which kuko is ar first dragging him to play and then he is enjoying the game a lot I#I love BAT way too much man I can't hold my own thoughts shdhhshs congrats if you reached this far into my love dump#every hour is BAT loving hours#ramblings#I'm so happy I made my mhr character Jyushi really
4 notes · View notes
bbyjackie · 7 months
Text
𝐒𝐎𝐂𝐈𝐀𝐋𝐒 𝐀𝐒 𝐙𝐎𝐑𝐎'𝐒 𝐆𝐅 — ♡
one piece social media + dating pt. 2 feat: zoro
Tumblr media
♡ liked by ilovecottoncandychopper, S0U1K1NGBR00K and 6.5k others
_ynln: who are you where do you live how old are you why are you so fine how do you like your eggs cooked in the morning?
tagged: theroronoa.zoro
theroronoa.zoro: sorry i have a girlfriend
↳ _ynln: damn, not even one chance? 😔😔
↳ theroronoa.zoro: nah (liked by p1rateking_luffy)
sogekingg.usopp: is your boyfriend single (liked by p1rateking_luffy)
↳ _ynln: USOPP WTAF 😭
↳ _ynln: stop trying to steal my man, get your own bro
↳ sogeking.usopp: now i don't support homewrecking, but.. ☝️😋
↳ _ynln: BUT????
blackleg.sanji: PLEASE YN PLEASE GIVE ME A CHANCE 🧎🏼‍♂️🧎🏼‍♂️
↳ _ynln: no
lovenami: WHERE ARE YOU GUYS?!?
↳ lovenami: WE WERE MEANT TO MEET UP TWO HOURS AGO WHERE TF ARE YOU
↳ _ynln: SORRY NAMI IDK EITHER ZORO DRAGGED US SOMEWHERE AND WE GOT LOST 😭
Tumblr media Tumblr media
♡ liked by FRAAANKY, trafalgar_d.law and 9.8k others
theroronoa.zoro: zoro. thousand sunny. 21. my gf invented me. like my eggs however yn likes them.
tagged: _ynln
jinbe: Very cute post (liked by nicorobin)
lovenami: anyone wanna jump off the ship w me?
↳ ace: yes 😁
blackleg.sanji: MY BEAUTIFUL GODDESS YN 💗💞💕💝❤️‍🔥
blackleg.sanji: I WILL DEDICATE MY LIFE TO YOU
_ynln: ZORO QWDHBIVEFBQOBJ
_ynln: i love u sm??
↳ theroronoa.zoro: apparently you don't cause why is there question marks
↳ _ynln: GEEZ OKAY I LOVE U 😭 (liked by theroronoa.zoro)
CAPTAIN.KIIIID: i hope y'all break up
↳ _ynln: DAMN KID WTF WHO HURT YOU
Tumblr media
♡ liked by theroronoa.zoro, p1rateking_luffy and 10.3k others
_ynln: drinks on?
tagged: lovenami
lovenami: drinks were on that random guy at the club 😇😇
↳ blackleg.sanji: @theroronoa.zoro HOW DARE YOU NOT PROTECT THEM FROM CREEPS 🫵
↳ theroronoa.zoro: he was supplying all of us with drinks why would i chase the guy away
↳ lovenami: real, i wasn't gonna pay 400 berries for a pint 🥱
blackleg.sanji: THE MOST BEAUTIFUL WOMEN IN THE WORLD IN ONE PHOTO?? 😍😍😘
blackleg.sanji: what did i ever do to deserve this 😩😩‼️
S0U1K1NGBR00K: May I see your panties?
↳ _ynln: absolutely not thanks (liked by lovenami, theroronoa.zoro)
p1rateking_luffy: LAST NIGHT WAS SO FUN 😄😄
p1rateking_luffy: THANKS FOR BUYING ME FOOD 💗
↳ _ynln: luffy wait what i didn't buy you anything?
↳ _ynln: OMFG DID YOU JUST DINE AND DASH???
Tumblr media
♡ liked by _ynln, nicorobin and 17 others
[close friends]
theroronoa.zoro: nice 👍
blackleg.sanji: I WILL NEVER FORGIVE YOU FOR THIS
blackleg.sanji: I AM SO JEALOUS
_ynln: best nap ever (liked by theroronoa.zoro)
p1rateking_luffy: I wanted to play tag but you guys were sleeping?
ilovecottoncandychopper: Yn looks like she gives good hugs! (liked by theroronoa.zoro)
↳ _ynln: CHOPPER GIVE ME HUGS ANYTIME ❣️❣️
sogeking.usopp: get this off my timeline right NOW 🫵
↳ _ynln: WHY ARE YOU GUYS SUCH HATERS 😭😭
5K notes · View notes
voguesriot · 2 months
Text
DON’T HURT YOURSELF ✹ luke castellan
( summary ) social media au where your boyfriend became the asshole everyone warned you he’d be and now you’re looking for revenge (& luke is a down bad loser w no game)
( pairings ) luke castellan x fem aphrodite counsellor!reader
Tumblr media
DIRECT MESSAGES
sarahdawson: hey girly ik we’re not like close or anything but something happened last night that i need to tell you about
sarahdawson: so i was getting strawberries yesterday and max was there and he was being really weird and like flirty and i’m so sorry i feel like such a horrible person even though i turned him down right away but he tried to kiss me and i hit him and then i went back to my cabin but i had to tell you
sarahdawson: i’m so sorry
yourusername: THAT FUCKING ASSHOLE I KNEW HE WASNT WORTH SHIT
yourusername: this is clarisse btw i took her phone
yourusername: (me again) thank you for telling me sarah it rlly means a lot 🫶
sarahdawson: if it makes any difference you’re way too hot for him and literally anything you need (even rigging archery lessons so the new kids take shots just as he’s walking by), i’m your girl x
♫ Don’t Hurt Yourself by Beyoncé feat. Jack White
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
♡ liked by silenabeauregard , connorstroll , and others
yourusername love god herself (love u mama) 💋
sarahdawson AHHH YOURE SO PRETTY
yourusername THANK YOU GORGEOUS 🥹🥹
clarisselarue too good for anyone 😮‍💨
silenabeauregard prettiest girl everrrr
chrisrodriguez pur girlie
yourusername what.
chrisrodriguez gods forbid a man expresses an ounce of girlish whimsy
yourusername nooo queen i appreciate you thank you
seaweedbrain you ate ‼️‼️‼️
seaweedbrain ate my dessert*
seaweedbrain it’s all fun and games until you end up stealing from the youth
seaweedbrain count your days miss counsellor
yourusername my girl sally should’ve kept you on a leash for a bit longer because you are rabid my love
seaweedbrain I WAS NEVER ON A LEASH WTF
racheledare STUNNA GIRL STUNNA GIRL I CHOOSE U BABY OVER A HUNDRED GIRLS
yourusername ME AND U 4EVERR 🙏🙏
lukecastellan nice dress!!
this comment was deleted.
clarisselarue lukecastellan i saw that.
lukecastellan why are you so ominous
clarisselarue why are you such a loser
lukecastellan have you ever been chill for a day in your life
clarisselarue have you ever known the loving touch of a woman
chrisrodriguez FOUL 😭😭😭
♫ Feather by Sabrina Carpenter
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
♡ liked by drewtanaka , pipermclean , and others
[ tagged: yourusername , clarisselarue , silenabeauregard , drewtanaka , hazellevesque , pipermclean ]
sarahdawson girls night w my favs 💘
silenabeauregard APOLLO CABIN 🔛🔝
yourusername FORREALLL
yourusername best night i’ve had in a long time i love u all sm ☹️🫶 ( liked by sarahdawson , clarisselarue , silenabeauregard , drewtanaka , hazellevesque , pipermclean )
silenabeauregard MY GIRLSSSSS
wisegirll prettiest girls in the world 💕💕
clarisselarue sarah girl love ya but maybe leave the singing to ur siblings 🙏
sarahdawson RUDE
yourusername sarahdawson dw baby i loved our duet xx
sarahdawson we simply are destiny’s child
drewtanaka yk who is shaking in his boots
seaweedbrain oh yeah cool i didn’t even want an invite it’s totally chill
yourusername calm down lil guy maybe when you’re older
clarisselarue if zeus doesn’t smite his ass before he gets the chance 😭
seaweedbrain clarisselarue I BEAT YOUR DADS ASS HES LITERALLY A DEADBEAT DADDY
wisegirll too far
seaweedbrain sorry clarisse
lukecastellan yourusername we could hear you singing all the way in hermes ☠️
yourusername NO THATS SO EMBARRASSING WHICH SONG
lukecastellan i think it was never lose me or smth
clarisselarue bros acting like he hasn’t been thinking ab it nonstop
yourusername lukecastellan i’m so sorry for any pain i’ve caused
chrisrodriguez AYY BRO MAKING MOVES
groverunderwood you call those moves? 😭
chrisrodriguez baby steps are still steps let me celebrate my guy in peace 😔
♫ Heartless by The Weeknd
Tumblr media Tumblr media
♡ liked by connorstroll , and others
maxwalsh never been better
clarisselarue oh that’s not ☠️
lukecastellan this what you’ve been doing instead of coming to sparring?
maxwalsh it’s a better challenge
drewtanaka THE CLAWS ARE OUT MEOW
yourusername just posted to their story!
Tumblr media
DIRECT MESSAGES
lukecastellan: you look really pretty
1K notes · View notes
joelscruff · 9 months
Text
feelings on fire (joel miller x f!reader) 18+ PART SEVEN
Tumblr media
previous chapters | welp. it's here. this one is a DOOZY, and i'm so sorry. i never expected it to get this long but oh well!!! go grab a snack and get settled cause this one is kinda wild. love u guys sm. i proofread this very quickly so i apologize if there's any mistakes!! and here's my kofi if you'd like to leave a tip 💕 chapter summary: the pressure is building in more ways than one. rating: 18+ explicit warnings: age difference (joel is in his 50s, reader is in her early 20s), innocent/inexperienced reader, praise kink, dirty talk, pet names, mentions of religion, catholic guilt, sexting, n00ds, oral (m receiving), lap-sitting, thigh riding, alcohol, lemme know if i missed any! word count: 15.6k ao3
You're beginning to learn that Joel runs hot and cold.
There have been moments with him, intimate and special and warm, moments that make you feel light on your feet and send butterflies wilding through your stomach. Moments where he's open and present and wants all his attention to be on you, on your body, your pleasure. His touch sets you alight, his words send tingles down your spine.
And then weekdays happen and you start second guessing yourself all over again.
On Sunday you'd attended church with your parents, another attempt at appeasing your mother in lieu of all the lies and deceit. You've only gone to a select few services since you came home, something you know they've been silently judging you for and just waiting to hold above your head. Admittedly you'd been afraid of bumping into people you knew, having to switch on your teenage persona of Good Catholic Girl™ and lie through your teeth about how good it feels to be back home again. Luckily in the few services you'd attended, you'd only run into some elderly family friends, managing to avoid anyone you went to high school with.
Your luck had to run out at some point, though. This service you'd been accosted by none other than Bethany, one of your childhood friends who you'd practically left in the dust when you'd gone away for college. Her friendship was always full of judgement, perfection, and not to mention heaps of Catholic guilt. She'd taken one look at you, appraising you up and down as if assessing you for imperfections, then pulled you into a tight hug.
"It's so good see you," she'd said when she'd pulled back, a wide - and borderline frightening - grin plastered on her face, "My momma told me you were back, thought I woulda heard from you by now!"
Your mother, standing beside you in your pew, had furrowed her brow at this, clearly confused. You hadn't understood her reaction completely until Bethany had headed off to go say hi to someone else.
"I thought you had lunch with her and Alice the other week," she'd murmured softly to you under her breath, giving you an accusatory look, "Said you'd be helping them out over the summer. That's what you told me, anyway."
Fuck.
"O-oh, right," you'd had no idea what else to say other than that, biting down on your lip and staring straight ahead as the service began. She hadn't said anything else about it, but you'd sat in discomfort and anxiety for the next hour.
In a panic, you'd found Bethany after the service and quickly asked if she needed any extra help at Sunday School, to which she'd responded with enthusiasm - a little too much - that they always needed extra hands on Thursdays to help with lesson planning. You'd jumped at the chance, telling her you'd be there.
That night you'd texted Joel. You hadn't heard from him all day despite it being a weekend, and part of you had been hoping you might go over and see him once your parents were asleep.
guess who's volunteering at church now? this idiot.
You'd expected words of comfort, maybe a joke, at least something that would make you feel better about the situation. However, his response to yours had been brief, short, simple:
Rough. Get some sleep x
This trend of short responses has only continued throughout the rest of the week. He's distant when you text him, responds with a few words at best, short and simple and almost like an entirely different person. It's hard to believe it's the same man who whispers good girl in your ear and tells you how well you're doing, how wet you are, how pretty you look. His texts are some ghostly version of him, constantly fading in and out, barely showing interest or desire - that is, if he texts you at all.
It makes your skin itch, sends your insecurities into a tailspin. Why does this always seem to happen? You can't make heads or tails of it - you know he's busy, know that his job takes a lot out of him, and yet you can't help but feel that there's something more he's not telling you. He'd told you on his back deck all about how he wasn't very happy at his job, how he'd prefer to be retired by now, living life on his own terms - so why can't he just do that? It's clearly taking a toll on him, and while part of you feels empathetic and yearns to comfort him, another part feels angry, irritated.
You'd gone to your friends with these concerns, hoping for some sort of answer or solution to the problem. Instead, they'd been more sympathetic to Joel's plight than yours.
you gotta remember you're not in a relationship with him babe
right!! men are v simple creatures. they see things black & white. ur his fuck buddy and he prob doesn't rly want it to go beyond that.
now THAT'S going too far. she's more than his fuck buddy definitely. he wouldn't have told her his whole life story last weekend if that were true.
telling her he had a fucked up childhood isn't necessarily his whole life story. most guys had shitty childhoods lbr
but he opened up!!!!! fuck buddies don't do that.
exactly
i wish you guys were here :(
i'm honestly 5 secs away from booking a flight to texas bestie. gotta use my dad's frequent flier miles somehow.
--
"My friend Tasha is coming to visit this weekend," you tell your mom on Wednesday evening with a smile, turning your phone toward her to show the Airbnb you'll be staying at, "We're gonna stay at this little bungalow, have a girls' weekend."
Her brow furrows, "Why can't Tasha stay here?"
Because Tasha would terrify you, you want to say, because Tasha doesn't wear pants unless absolutely necessary. Instead you just smile again and say, "I think a change of scenery would be good for me, it'll be like a mini vacation. Plus there's a hot tub."
"Now that's something we need," she turns back to her book with a shake of her head, "I swear, your father is more interested in buying that boat we'll never use instead of something new for the backyard." You hadn't been asking for her permission, but her indifference sends a wave of relief through you; you've still been trying to be on your absolute best behavior lately to make up for the lies.
You head out to the backyard and seat yourself in a lounge chair by the pool, unlocking your phone again and swiping to your last conversation with Joel from last night.
hope you had a good day :)
I'm sure yours was better. Sleep well x
Curt and to the point, not at all what you'd wanted him to reply with. You recall one of your first phone conversations, the one where you'd been experiencing the same lack of interest in his texts, what he'd said to you: Don't think for one second that I don't think about you. But how can you not? How are you supposed to feel desired when he's being like this?
can you call me tonight?
You try not to wait too long before biting the bullet, not wanting to talk yourself out of it, but you do stare at the message with your finger hovering over the send button for longer than you really need to. The sound of the back door sliding open forces you to send it, locking your phone again as your mother walks over and seats herself beside you in another chair.
"It's nice to see you wearing that again," she says with a nod to your chest, referring to your crucifix - after wearing it again last weekend you'd thought that keeping it on might please her. "You're starting to really settle in here again, aren't you?"
You try not to grimace, "Yeah, it's nice being home."
She leans back in her chair, letting the suns rays hit her for a little bit without speaking. You sit there waiting for her to say something else, discomfort flooding through you. You're reminded of how easy it was to sit with Joel in his backyard last weekend, how little pressure there was to put up any kind of front - sitting here with your mother is the exact opposite.
"So, you lied to me," she finally says, voice quiet.
Your eyes widen and you sit up a bit, turning to her with panic already rising in your throat, "Wh-what do you mean?"
She doesn't turn to look at you, continuing to stare at the sky, eyes covered by her comically large sunglasses, "You know what I mean."
You sit there, staring at her with a mix of confusion and fear. There's no way she knows about Joel, how could she know? Who would have told her? You wonder if perhaps one of her neighborhood friends saw you leaving his house, saw you in his car... but the guise of lessons is your cover now, so how would any of that point to your relationship?
Some relationship, you can't help but think to yourself, based entirely on sex and only communication on the weekends.
"Bethany and Alice," your mom finally states, and you feel the panic in the pit of your stomach loosen immediately - oh.
"Mom," you say immediately, shaking your head, "I-I know. I'm sorry. I know I told you we met up but..." you bite your lip, trying to come up with some kind of excuse but coming up empty.
Instead, you do something that surprises you entirely - you tell the truth. Or at least... half of it.
"I really feel like my friendship with them has passed," you admit with a frown, "I'm... I'm different than I was when I left, you know that, don't you? I'm sure you've noticed."
She's still not looking at you but you catch her nodding slowly, thoughtfully.
"I'm sorry I lied but... I didn't want to disappoint you. And I didn't want you to worry about me being alone all the time. I'm actually rarely ever alone at college so it's been nice to have some time to myself," you smile, thinking of the girls in your group chat constantly waiting for new updates, "Having lunch with two people I haven't talked to in years just... didn't seem appealing to me. I have different friends now, you know? I'm older, people outgrow each other."
"Friends like Tasha," your mom states, bitterness in her voice, "Tasha who you don't even want me to meet."
You make a face, "Mom..."
She puts her hands up in defeat, shaking her head, "It's fine. You can do what you want and so can she," the words are drenched in judgement, "But you should remember that there are rules for staying here, young lady. And honesty is one of those rules."
You take a deep breath, swinging your legs around the edge of the chair and placing your arms on your knees, your face in your hands. You're so close to snapping back at her, making a comment that'll surely start an argument, but you shove it back down as best you can, counting to ten in your head.
"I'm sorry," you finally say through gritted teeth, "It won't happen again."
"It better not." She stands up then, disappears from the chair as quickly as she'd settled in it. You watch as she walks to the back door again, reaches for the handle.
Your mouth can't stop itself.
"Have you told Dad about my guitar lessons yet?"
She freezes, turns and stares at you for a moment without saying anything, then opens the door and heads back inside, slamming it behind her.
Checkmate.
--
I will when I get home.
Your anxiety is through the roof as you pace back and forth in your bedroom after darkness has fallen, freshly showered and pampered and already out of distractions. Without really thinking much about it, you pull Joel's flannel from under your mattress and wrap it around your shoulders, breathing him in as you sit on your bed and try your best not to keep checking your phone. When it finally vibrates you're not even embarrassed when you pick up on the first ring.
"Hey," you murmur, settling into your sheets and closing your eyes, "Is everything okay?"
"With me?" he asks, voice tired and gruff, "Thought it'd be the other way around."
Your brow furrows, "What do you mean?"
"Thought you'd wanna talk about this church volunteerin' stuff," he's moving around as he talks - you hear the sound of a cupboard banging and the clang of a glass against a countertop.
You don't speak for a moment, listening to the sound of liquid being poured into a cup and Joel taking a swig. There's no sound of the tap - you'd be willing to bet that it's not water he's drinking.
"No, I..." you frown, "I was worried about you."
You hear him take another sip, swallowing loudly and then placing the cup back down with a clink. More pouring. You swear you hear the faint sound of a chuckle before he takes another swig.
"Well that's silly," he states, and you suddenly notice there's a strange difference in his voice, a heaviness you're not used to.
"Are you drunk?"
He chuckles again but there's no humor in it, "Nowhere near as drunk as I'd like to be."
You frown, readjusting yourself against the pillows. You hear him take another sip, "Did something happen?"
He sighs then, deep and tired. You hear him put the glass back down on the counter, "No, babygirl, nothin' happened," hearing him say your pet name makes you feel a little better, the anxiety ebbing away a bit, "It's just that my job is the bane of my fuckin' existence."
He sounds genuinely exhausted, words tinged with resentment. You pull his flannel tighter around yourself, breathe him in, pretend you're in the same room as him, "Talk to me," you say softly, "Tell me what's wrong."
He doesn't reply for a moment - you can make out some footsteps on the other end, the creak of his stairs as he goes up to his bedroom, "No, darlin', it's nothin'. Shouldn't be talkin' about this with you."
"Hey, if something's bothering you, I wanna hear about it. I wanna make it better... if I can."
You hear him settle onto his bed, a satisfied little noise emanating from his throat that makes you smile, "That's the thing, babygirl. You can't. This is just the way life works. You do shit you hate and then you die, plain and simple."
"Joel," you admonish quietly - it's the first time you've said his name aloud since last weekend, it feels right on your lips, safe. He sighs but doesn't say anything else, breath evening out in your ear. "What is it? Really? I've been worrying about it all week."
"Oh honey," he murmurs softly. "Shouldn't be worryin' about me, there are more important things."
"Not to me," you admit, closing your eyes and shaking your head even though he can't see you, "First I thought maybe you were just busy, but-"
"Busy," he scoffs, "Right, yeah, busy. That's my middle name at this point. Fuckin' busy."
He really doesn't sound like himself - you know you still don't know him very well at this point, could be wrong about so many things, but part of you just knows that this isn't Joel. You know his softness, his safety, his kind eyes and crooked smile. This version of him sounds so sad; you can't help but wish you were in his bed right now, able to hold him close and run your fingers through his grey curls. You want him to open up to you.
"You don't wanna hear this shit, angel, you don't," he continues, voice gentler this time, "I know you're thinkin' somethin' is wrong, thinkin' somethin' in particular happened to make me feel like this, but the truth is..." he sighs again, deliberates for a moment and then simply states, "Truth is I'm just bein' stupid."
"You're not stupid," you say immediately, and he chuckles.
"God, you're so sweet, babygirl," he murmurs softly, "It's nice to hear your voice."
Your feel your skin heat up at the words, crossing your legs together unconsciously, "It's nice to hear yours too," you whisper with a smile, "I've missed you this week. Every time you've texted me it's felt like it's not really you."
"I'm sorry, baby," you can hear the sincerity in his voice buried underneath the tiredness and alcohol, "I'm just... I'm a mess." You hear him shuffle a bit in bed, like he's turning onto his side, "Work is always puttin' me in a shitty mood lately and I just...I don't want you to see this side of me."
"But why?"
Another sigh, then-
"'Cause I don't want you to look at me differently."
You bring the sleeve of his flannel to your lips, "I could never look at you differently, Joel," you whisper, "Promise."
He's quiet for a moment and you hope you haven't upset him, hope he's just thinking about what to say. You mean your words; it really would take a lot for you to look at him differently. You know you probably shouldn't feel that way considering you've known him less than a month, that the feeling should scare you... but it doesn't.
"I'm tired, angel," he finally says, voice sad and distant, "I'm too old to be doin' this job."
You wait for him to speak again, listening as he takes a shaky breath on the other end of the line, almost like he hasn't told anyone this. And maybe he hasn't.
"But it's hard to admit that to myself," he continues, "And even harder to admit it to you of all people. I don't want you to see some washed up, tired, old geezer, ya know?" he says it with humor but you can tell that he means it, "I mean I used to... god, I used to be able to do shifts like this no problem. Be up at five and home by midnight and able to do it all over again the next day. Now it's like I'm runnin' on a half empty tank of gas. Got no joy in this job anymore and my back is killin' me and-" he cuts himself off suddenly, "And I need to shut the fuck up before I scare you away."
"You're not gonna scare me away," you whisper, and you mean it, "I'm not going anywhere."
He laughs softly to himself; you're not sure if he believes you, but you're choosing to hope that he does, "Ya know, I didn't even wanna tell you my age when we were first together? I wasn't gonna tell you, I really wasn't. But then you were so sweet and vulnerable and honest with me-"
You scoff, "Yeah, lying about knowing how to play guitar, that's certainly honesty."
"That's not what I mean and you know it," he chastises - you can hear the sudden smile in his voice, "No, darlin'... when you told me you hadn't done anythin' before. That's when I knew I had to tell you, 'cause it wouldn't have been right otherwise," he makes an odd noise in his throat and then corrects, "Not that any of this is really right, but..."
"It feels right," you say softly, staring down at the plaid lines on the flannel shirt shrouding your body, reminding you of what it means - that you're his.
"It does," he agrees, voice rough and low, "Right and wrong in all the right ways, huh babygirl?"
You nod to yourself, unable to help the grin that spreads across your face, "Exactly."
The both of you are silent for a few moments but just like last weekend, it isn't uncomfortable or awkward. It's calming and safe, just listening to each other's breathing. You can tell he's tired, can hear it in his slow exhales; again, you can't help but wish you were lying beside him. And you can't help but wonder if a more sober Joel would have even said any of this to you, would have just kept it to himself and continued to deal with it in silence, not bothering to tell anyone how he's been feeling. It breaks your heart a little bit.
"It'll be okay," you whisper gently, soothingly, "It won't be like this forever, Joel."
He sighs, deep and sleepy, "You really are an angel," he murmurs, "So sweet and lovely, babygirl. Love hearin' you say my name like that."
His words send warmth throughout your body - no one has ever spoken to you the way Joel speaks to you, makes you feel the way he makes you feel. You close your eyes and bury your face in the sleeve of his flannel, listen as his breathing gets slow again.
"You should get some sleep," you whisper, even though you really don't want to end the call - but Joel is tired and you want him to feel better, "Text me tomorrow, okay? Even if you're grumpy."
He almost laughs but he's so close to sleep that it comes out slurred and low, "Okay, baby, I will. Promise."
"Goodnight, J-"
"Wait wait wait," he suddenly sounds a bit more alert, rousing himself from sleep, "You didn't tell me 'bout this church thing. You okay with it?"
You giggle at his sudden concern, "It's nothing, really. Just helping an old friend out with lesson plans for Sunday School. Not very exciting."
"Fun," his voice is sleepy and low again, "What're you gonna wear?"
You have to bite down on your lip to stifle another laugh, shaking your head even though he can't see you, "Go to bed, you perv."
He chuckles, "Okay, okay. Goodnight, angel."
"Goodnight, Joel."
You're about to end the call when you hear him murmur one final thing, so soft you're surprised you can even make it out - but you do:
"Hope I dream about you."
You fall asleep with a smile glued to your lips.
--
You end up wearing the same outfit you'd worn to Joel's last Saturday, though you leave the stockings at home; you doubt the women at church will be offended by your bare legs. You fasten your crucifix around your neck and make sure your mom gets a good look at you before you leave the house; you haven't spoken since yesterday afternoon but you still want her to see you're putting in some effort, as surface level as it may be.
She's in the living room when you come down the stairs, and her expression can't help but turn to one of surprise when she looks up from her book to see you standing there in your Sunday best.
"I'm going to the church," you explain softly, "Gonna help out Bethany with the lesson plan for Sunday School."
She assesses you up and down, eyes fixing on your crucifix for a moment before trailing back down to her book. She doesn't say a word.
Silent treatment. Typical.
Fifteen minutes later you find yourself being greeted by Bethany, blonde hair flowing down her dress as she stands outside the church with a bright smile plastered on her face. You recognize the forced expression immediately, one that you yourself have become an expert in feigning, though for different reasons. You haven't seen her in years but you still know her well enough to tell when she's less than thrilled about something - this time that "something" is you being there.
"I'm so excited you're here!" she tells you, voice shrill as she immediately takes a step forward to envelop you in a haphazard hug that feels neither excited nor genuine.
You should have known it would be like this. When you'd left for college a few years ago you'd promised to keep in touch with both Alice and Bethany, the only "solid" friends you'd managed to keep throughout all the studying, the tutoring, the church services, the extracurriculars, volunteering, etc. It's a miracle in itself that your friendship had even lasted through high school, if you're being honest. You'd begun to distance yourself from them a bit in those final years as you started to lose your faith while theirs only seemed to grow stronger. Leaving for college had been the last nail in the coffin.
"Me too!" you lie, feigning a similar smile as you both pull back from each other.
Though her grin is unrelenting, you can see the distance in her eyes, the sourness and disdain for your presence extremely evident. She doesn't like you. There's an awkward few seconds of silence where she assesses you up and down again, like she had at the service on Sunday.
Why did you even say yes to me coming here? You want to ask as you stand in front of her awkwardly, not really knowing what to say. If you didn't want me here you could have just said there wasn't anything for me to do. But you already know why you'd still been invited despite her obvious disdain for you - keeping up appearances means everything to these people; actually being honest about her feelings would have been disastrous for her reputation.
"Was sure you'd forgotten all about me," she finally says with an edge of malice still shrouded through her smile, "Haven't heard from you in what? Three years? And then you just show up outta the blue, huh?"
You grimace, "Uh, yeah, sorry about that. There was... I mean, I've just had a lot going on, I guess." You kick your feet awkwardly; this is not the conversation you want to be having right now.
"A lot goin' on, huh?" she echoes, eyes still scanning you up and down, "Right. Busy with college?"
You nod quickly, "Yeah, it's been kinda crazy."
She raises an eyebrow, "What are you studyin' again?"
"English Lit."
She snorts then, shaking her head and taking a step back, "Right. Reading. Sure sounds crazy."
Your brow furrows, "It's more than that."
"Oh, I'm sure it is," she puts her hands up in defense, fake laughing and smacking her lips together, "Just find it funny that an English Lit degree takes up so much of your time." She's being pretty bold with the sarcasm but you suppose she has a right to be angry, though you'd never assumed she'd be this pissed about you cutting her off, "Anyway, we should get inside, they're waitin' for us."
"Bethany," you take a step toward her, softening your expression, "I'm really sorry."
She just shakes her head again and turns away from you to reach for the handle on the front door, forced smile finally fading into a natural frown, "Forget it."
Great start.
You don't talk much after that, not after you're led into a side room off the chapel where a few other women are sitting in a circle with binders in their laps. Bethany simply gestures for you sit down in an empty chair and the meeting begins. Everyone immediately begins their rapport, discussing their plans and reading quotes aloud from their binders while you just kind of sit there unsure of what to do or say. A few of the women give you a tentative smile or two, but the way Bethany periodically glares at you is enough to keep them from actually speaking to you directly. You're okay with it though; as awkward as this is, you'd rather sit in silence than have to pretend. Still, if you'd known it would be like this you never would have come - it's not like your mother appreciates it anyway.
Your phone vibrates at one point, a text from Tasha confirming her flight information with lots of !!!!!!'s that make you smile. As if sensing your sudden mood shift, Bethany puts her hands up with another grin that doesn't reach her eyes.
"We keep phones in our purses" she says sweetly, "So we don't get distracted."
You nod and slip it back inside your bag, a gesture that's more of a peace offering than anything else; it seems to appease her.
It's strange being inside this part of the church again after so long. You'd attended your own Sunday School lessons here, prepped for choir and readings, learned your scripture. It certainly doesn't feel as safe or inviting as it once did, though you have to admit that there was always an undercurrent of pressure, of judgement - an energy that still remains today. Bethany watches you closely, quietly assessing you as you nod along to everyone's suggestions and ideas and try to keep up your long-time façade of obedience. You push down the new parts of you that long to take back a bit of control, maybe say something shocking or suggest something ridiculous just to see how they'd react.
You've been sitting in silence for about forty five minutes when Bethany announces its time for a quick phone break. Like clockwork everyone in the room pulls out their devices and starts checking for missed calls from their kids, their husbands. You pull yours out and your eyebrows go up in surprise when you see a text from Joel on your lockscreen:
How's your day going angel?
He didn't forget his promise. A smile plays at your lips as you start typing out your reply, but it quickly fades when you feel Bethany's eyes on you, watching.
"I'm, uh-" you stand up, smoothing out the creases in your dress and gripping your phone tightly, "I'm gonna take a bathroom break."
--
The bathroom is the same as you remember it, high ceilings and white walls, your footsteps echoing loudly as you walk over to the sinks and lean your back against the countertop. You continue typing out your reply to Joel:
well all the church ladies are giving me the silent treatment til i'm worthy of being here again lol. but jokes on them cause my mom is also giving me the silent treatment so i have training! anyway i miss you. wanna hug you. hope you're feeling a bit better today 💕
You turn around and face the mirror while you wait for his reply. You're still smiling - it's impossible not to when you're thinking about Joel, but this smile is bright and genuine, unlike the forced grins you've been sharing with Bethany for the past hour. God, you can't remember the last time anything made you feel as free and happy as Joel makes you, like nothing else really matters. Your phone buzzes and you tear your eyes away from the mirror to read his reply:
Aw baby I'm sorry. I wanna hug you too. Wanna do a bit more than hug if I'm being honest, but you know that already.
You bring your other hand up to your mouth, smiling even wider into it as his typing bubble pops up again only seconds later:
And I'm sorry about last night. If I said anything stupid please forget it ever happened. Me and alcohol don't mix that well sometimes. I'm alright, don't worry about me x
But I do worry, you want to say, I want to make you feel better. But how can you do that from a church bathroom, miles away from wherever he is right now? You're suddenly reminded of something he'd told you a few weeks ago, something you hadn't quite understood in the moment - You can text me whenever you want, tell me all about what you're doin', brighten up my workday. Maybe send me some pictures.
Oh.
You look at yourself in the mirror again and carefully place your phone down on the edge of the sink. Your hand slowly comes up to push aside the collar of your dress, pull the stretchy material past your shoulder and down your arm. You do the same to the other side, slipping out of your sleeves and tugging down the high neckline of your dress to expose your bare chest to the mirror, putting your cleavage on display. You bite your lip, willing yourself to see what Joel sees, a pretty girl in a pretty dress, bra straps clinging to her skin and a crucifix hanging from her throat. Filthy.
You grab your phone and turn it toward the mirror, opening up your camera app and moving it close enough so he can see only your torso, sleeves hanging limp at your sides while your other arm comes up to squeeze your breasts together a bit, accentuating your cleavage even more. You snap a pic and send it to him before you can talk yourself out of it.
He replies seconds later:
Fuck
A grin spreads across your face and you make quick work of slipping your bra straps down your shoulders as well, just as another text from him comes in:
Send me another baby. Please.
Already one step ahead of you, you think to yourself as your cheeks warm and you pull down the cups of your bra, your breasts spilling out into the cool air of the bathroom. You squeeze them together again, nipples hardening tightly as you take another picture and send it along with a coy message:
better?
He must be staring at his phone, waiting for it, because his typing bubble appears instantaneously. You can't help but feel a sense of pride at the power you're holding right now, a change of pace from your usual naivety.
Oh babygirl. This is just what I needed.
i know :)
You glance at the bathroom door and then at the time - you still have a few minutes before the meeting starts up again and your mind is already racing with what you can do with those few minutes. With barely any hesitation you tug your dress up over your thighs, pulling your panties to the side and aiming your phone underneath. You frown when you pull your phone back up to find that it's dark and blurry.
"Hold on," you whisper to no one, then carefully lift your leg and place your heel on the countertop for support, pulling your dress up again and aiming your phone a little better. You pull back your panties and aren't surprised in the slightest to feel that they're suddenly damp.
This picture comes out much better. Your pussy is bare and a little wet, clit poking out past your lips, panties pulled against your inner thigh. You already know it's gonna make him crazy as you hit send.
Jesus Christ
He's already typing something else when you receive it and you can't help but giggle, covering your mouth and trying to picture where he is right now, what he's doing. Is he in a bathroom too? On a break? Or is he in the middle of a job, surrounded by other people? The latter thought makes you even wetter somehow.
Fuck you have such a pretty pussy baby.
thank you mr. miller :)
Will you hold her open a little for me? Show me that sweet little hole?
Who are you to deny such a request? With heat radiating all over your body you bring your phone down again and scissor your lips apart, exposing the innermost part of yourself to your phone camera. You can feel your own slick on the tips of your fingers, and when you push yourself open you feel a bit of your wetness dribble down onto your palm. Fuck. This is hotter than you'd expected it would be. You'd thought it would be a good way to make him feel better, get him through his work day like he'd said; you never thought you'd enjoy it this much.
Oh sweetheart. Look at that.
You feel another rush of pride as you take your leg down from the counter and tug your dress back down, rubbing your thighs together and doing everything in your power not to touch yourself again even though you want to. A quiet whimper unconsciously tears itself past your lips at his follow-up message:
Who's that perfect pussy belong to babygirl?
You've never typed a message back so fast in your life.
you. it's yours mr. miller.
That's right. Good girl.
Your skin is on fire, body tingling in all the right places. You smooth a hand down your bare chest, cup one of your breasts, gently squeeze. It's impossible for your eyes not to roll back a bit when you imagine Joel's hand on you instead, big and firm and callused and perfect. Your pussy throbs in your underwear and another whimper slips past your lips.
i'm really wet now :(
I know angel. Come over tonight and I'll take care of it, Ok?
Your heart leaps at the invitation, even more wetness pooling in your panties at the thought of what Joel might want to do tonight, if there's another “lesson” he has in mind.
yes please
Eyeing the time again, you bite your lip in disappointment when you realize you should probably be getting back. You wait until Joel has finished typing his final response, a message that makes your skin burn with anticipation:
Don't touch yourself til you see me. Keep that soft little pussy hidden, baby. Promise me.
i promise x
Just as you hit send you suddenly hear the unmistakable sound of footsteps down the hall, quickly approaching the bathroom. Your eyes widen in the mirror, gaze snapping to your bare breasts, sleeves still hanging loosely at your sides. In a panic you hurriedly attempt to stuff yourself back into your bra before you have company – but you're not that lucky.
The bathroom door bangs open and you freeze with one arm halfway through your sleeve, breasts still completely exposed in the mirror as you turn on the spot to see none other than Bethany standing there, frozen in place.
“I-” she looks flabbergasted, expression one of pure horror as she takes a step back from you and grips the knob of the door like she could rip it off at any moment. Your free arm that isn't trapped in a sleeve comes up to cover yourself as best you can, but you know she's already seen everything.
“I'm- I was just-” You're similarly taken aback and at a complete loss for words, unsure how the fuck you can explain what exactly she's just walked in on.
Her eyes fall to the phone in your hand, like she's putting the pieces together, then she shakily takes another step back and leaves without saying another word, the click of her heels echoing back at you loudly until the door finishes closing behind her.
Shit.
You don't have time to stand around thinking up an excuse; you do briefly consider escaping through one of the windows to avoid facing her, but you know it would just delay the inevitable. Instead you hastily finish pulling your dress back on and stare at yourself in the mirror for one final moment.
Your smile is gone. So is the light in your eyes. You suddenly begin to feel that familiar sense of guilt creeping in, the shame, the sin. You blink a few times and find that there are tears welling up in your eyes, a lump in your throat. A tiny voice in the back of your mind, one you've been attempting to mute for years, whispers to you: What have you done?
--
Bethany doesn't speak to or look at you for the rest of the meeting. It's not much of a change from before you'd gone to the bathroom, but there's something new in her silence now, something you can see in her eyes as she stares down at her binder while the other women talk. Fear. You've known her for most of your life, can sense certain mood changes from a mile away; you've frightened her. And somehow that just adds even more to the guilt building in your stomach.
You'll apologize to her after the meeting, it's all you can do. You genuinely feel horrible that she'd walked in on something so private, seen something she never intended or desired to ever see. You wonder if there's anything you can use to pass off as an excuse; maybe you spilled something on your dress and were cleaning it off? Maybe it was too tight and you needed a breather? Anything is better than the alternative – the truth – but you somehow doubt she'll believe anything you say at this point. That bridge was broken the second you left for college; there's no repairing it now.
The meeting ends with a few pleasantries exchanged and several comments about picking kids up from school, getting home to cook something for dinner, normal things that remind you how abnormal your own situation is in comparison. Half an hour ago you'd felt on top of the world, in control, had power in the tips of your fingers. Now you just feel small again, inconsequential.
You wait until the other ladies have left before taking a step toward Bethany, ready to unload your apologies and beg for forgiveness. She surprises you by speaking first.
"I'd think twice before wearing that again,” she hisses at you, venomous and pointed. Your eyes widen.
"Excuse me?"
"I said,” her words are slow and full of bitter intention, eyes glaring daggers at you, “I'd think twice before wearing that again" she gestures to the crucifix around your neck and you unconsciously reach up to take it between your fingers, glancing down at it before looking back up to meet her angry gaze.
“I'm...” you feel overwhelmed, tears pricking in your eyes again at the sudden burst of rage being directed at you, “I don't...”
"You might not understand this,” she practically spits through her teeth, “but that symbol actually means something to the people here."
"I know what it means.” It comes out as barely a whisper, voice shaky as she takes an intimidating step toward you with nothing but malice in her expression.
"So that's why you've got your breasts out in a public bathroom? A church bathroom?”
“Bethany, I-”
“You're not welcome here anymore, understand?” her voice is full of finality, “You can come to church with your parents-” The mention of your parents sends your anxiety into a tailspin, heart beating frantically in your chest as she continues to step closer and closer toward you, “And you can pretend you're their good little girl. But I know the truth. And it's not welcome in my Sunday School ever again. Got it?”
My Sunday school. The superiority complex is strong and you know deep down that this is all completely rooted in her own fears, her own desires, her pride, but none of that seems to matter when she's staring you down like this, holding you captive with her hostile words.
"Got it,” you whisper, nodding shakily.
"Good. Now go home and take," she points toward the crucifix, the tip of her finger close enough to faintly brush against the shape of it, “that,” she suddenly prods it, giving you one final sneer, “off.”
It takes you twenty minutes to leave the parking lot after that, tears blurring your vision as you cry in your car and try not to let the shame completely envelop you.
--
Going to Joel's that night carries none of the anticipation you'd felt earlier this afternoon; instead you feel nothing but shame as you steal your mother's house key from its dish in the hallway, closing the front door behind you as softly as you can and hurrying out into the night. There's no excitement or rush like the last time you'd done this. You feel like you could cry at any moment as you approach Joel's house, climbing his front steps with a heavy weight on your shoulders that wasn't there before, that hasn't been there in weeks.
The door opens before you can even turn the knob – he must have been watching from his window, waiting for you in anticipation for tonight's “lesson”. Your stomach lurches.
“There's my little Sunday School girl,” he murmurs, taking your hand and tugging you gently inside.
“Please don't call me that,” you say quietly, head down.
He shuts the door behind you and takes your hands in his – you can feel his eyes on you but you're unsure of the look on his face, what expression is on it. Does he sense there's something wrong? Or is he waiting for you to jump his bones?
“Hey,” his voice is soft, concerned, “Hey, look at me, sweetheart.”
You shake your head, still staring at the floor.
“What happened, babygirl?” he murmurs, one of his hands releasing yours to come up and stroke your cheek gently, thumb grazing the wetness beneath your eyes, “Why're you cryin', darlin'? C'mere.” His finger travels down to your chin, pushes your face up to look at him.
His expression is worried, brow furrowed and forehead creased, a frown playing at his lips. You feel your heartbeat slow, the weight on your shoulders decreasing just a little bit as safety settles in your bones. He cares.
“I had a horrible day,” you whisper, feeling tears trickle down into the corners of your mouth, “I know you want to...want to...” you shake your head, “Whatever we were gonna do. But I don't think I can tonight, Joel. I don't feel good.”
“Oh, babygirl,” he breathes, releasing your chin and immediately wrapping you up in his embrace, arms tightening around you as he pulls you against his chest, “We don't have to do anythin', don't even worry about that.”
You bury your face in his chest, breathe him in. His flannel underneath your mattress is nothing compared to the real thing, the real smell of him overtaking your senses and filling you with a true feeling of warmth and safety. His arms are so big – he's so big – and without meaning to you find yourself going completely limp in his arms, bones turning to jelly. It's like finally breathing in the fresh air after holding your breath underwater, a natural reaction to finally being where you belong.
He doesn't question your body's response, almost seems to understand completely as he pulls you up from the floor and adjusts you slightly to cradle you in his arms, carrying you past the living room, past the kitchen, up the stairs and to his bedroom. You just close your eyes and bury your face in his shirt, inhale the scent of sawdust and sweat and cedar and Joel.
He tips you gently onto his bed, presses a gentle kiss to your forehead before settling in beside you without saying anything. You feel his arm wrap around you, tug you in closer beside him as he noses your hair and lets you just exist.
Minutes pass before you finally break the comfortable silence, voice quiet and small - “I feel so ashamed.”
You feel his brow furrow in your hair and you turn around to face him, bringing your arm up around his torso and pressing your hand firmly against his back. He looks at you with confusion, concern.
You tell him everything. About Bethany, your friendship with her and Alice before you left for college, the way you'd already begun to lose your faith even then. You tell him about your mom, about the silent treatment and her reaction to the white lie, the lie that's practically nothing in the grand scheme of deceit you've been weaving these past few weeks. You talk about church and Sunday School and all the guilt you'd felt in that little room growing up, how being there again felt wrong and uncomfortable. You tell him how free you'd felt in the bathroom with your camera, the power you'd felt, reclaimed, and how all of it had been snatched away from you the second Bethany had entered. How she'd destroyed any semblance of confidence you'd been able to find today, how she'd shamed you for the crucifix that you don't even want to be wearing. It's the most you've ever told him, the most you've ever talked to him about anything.
And he listens.
He doesn't seem put out by your venting, annoyed or irritated or ready to send you home at any minute. He just nods, frowns at the right moments, strokes your arm and your cheek, kisses your forehead when you start to cry. Wipes the tears away when you apologize for crying. He stays with you and remains present and attentive, lets you talk and talk until you start to apologize for how much you've been talking.
“I know this isn't even what you signed up for,” you blubber, shaking your head and bringing your hands up to cover your face, “I'm sorry I keep bringing so much- so many complications into your life.”
“Shh,” he soothes, placing his large hands on yours and pulling them away from your tired eyes, leaning in to brush his nose against yours, “Stop apologizin', baby. Stop. You've got nothin' to be sorry for.”
You suddenly sit up in bed, leaning back against the headboard and bringing a hand up to touch the crucifix still clasped around your neck. You hadn't taken it off like she'd told you to do; you'd felt like doing so would have made you weak, would have been like giving up, even though you'd never wanted to even wear it again in the first place.
“Why does this little thing have so much fucking power over me?” you ask aloud, not directed at Joel but more-so to yourself, “My whole life, no one has ever seen me, they've just seen this.” You shake your head, squeezing the tiny cross in your hand. “And wearing it again has just brought all that shit back, it's done absolutely nothing good. Wore it for my mom and she still gives me the silent treatment. Wore it for Bethany and she still treats me like garbage, tells me to take it off. It's just a fucking necklace.”
Joel sits up beside you, places a warm hand on your thigh and peers at you with those soft brown eyes, lulling you back into a sense of calm, of serenity.
“Give it to me,” he says quietly.
Your brow furrows in confusion. You stare at him for a moment, then watch as he carefully brings his hands up to graze his callused fingertips against your neck, brushing the chain.
“I'll take it off your hands for a bit,” he murmurs, “Outta sight, outta mind. And if you want it back, I'll have it ready for you. How's that sound?”
You nod slowly to yourself, feeling your eyes begin to sting again at his words, “...Good. Th-that sounds good.”
Without saying anything else you hear the sound of the clasp being undone, feel the chain slip away from your skin as Joel takes it from you. You turn your head to watch as he fists it in his palm for a moment, gaze thoughtful and faraway as he traces the shape of the cross with his thumb. A few seconds later he opens his bedside table and carefully places it inside, then shuts the drawer.
And just like that, the weight is gone.
--
You take a shower in his bathroom again, wanting to wash this day off you and start over, clean slate. You could have had one when you got home from the meeting earlier but you'd instead opted to just lay in bed feeling sorry for yourself for much longer than you'd needed to. Now you close your eyes and let the hot water envelop you, wash yourself with Joel's body wash and allow yourself to become his again, picturing him laying in his bed in the other room, waiting for you. This is what matters. This moment. Right now.
You enter his bedroom wrapped in one of his towels, drops of water still spilling down your skin onto the hardwood floor. He's sitting up in bed, shirtless with his legs hidden under the covers. He's seemingly deep in thought as he stares at his phone screen, brows scrunched together. You watch as he pulls the phone away from himself, eyes squinting and lips parting a bit, then pulls it back, like he can't see what he's looking at properly. You realize that's probably the case.
“You need glasses,” you say with a soft giggle, and his expression relaxes when he sees you standing there, phone going back on his nightstand.
“I have glasses,” he admits sheepishly, giving you a tender smile, “Just hate wearin' 'em.”
“Of course,” you roll your eyes and take a few steps forward, still gripping the towel around yourself. His eyes fall to the parts of you that are bare, revelling in the way the lamplight reflects on your wet skin. You feel tingles erupt through your senses under his gaze.
“Are you naked?” you ask softly.
He shakes his head, “Wearin' pants, don't worry.”
You stand there for a moment, staring. He just stares back, eyebrows going up a bit while he waits for you to say something else. When you don't, he tilts his head slightly, appraising you.
“Do you want me to be naked, babygirl?”
You're answering before you even really know what you want, "Yes."
Without needing to be told twice he reaches under the covers with both hands and shimmies his way out of his pajama bottoms, staying hidden under the sheets as he tosses them out onto the floor. You bite your lip, still just standing there staring at him without moving. You're still dripping everywhere, a little puddle of water forming at your feet the longer you stay frozen.
He raises his finger and playfully curls it toward himself with a smile, "C'mere, baby," he murmurs, "Be naked with me."
You don't need telling twice either.
The towel drops from your body, landing in the puddle of water on the floor - easy cleanup. You feel heat radiating through every inch of your bare skin as you walk toward the bed, avoiding Joel's eyes and quickly slipping in beside him. You really don't know what you're doing - you'd said when you got here that you didn't want to do anything, not tonight, and it's still true. But part of you just aches to be close to Joel, to feel his warm heat, his rough skin, be connected to him somehow. It's what you've wanted all week.
You inch in beside him, back against the headboard, your bare thigh touching his lightly beneath the sheets, and you find yourself tensing up unconsciously. He clocks your reaction immediately.
"You don't gotta be nervous, angel," he tells you softly, soothingly.
You swallow and take a deep breath, "It's hard not to be," you whisper, though there's no reason to, "I'm just... I'm so..."
"What?" he asks, brown eyes seeking yours in the dim light. His hand comes up to cradle your face, thumb swiping beneath your eye again like he's checking for more tears - luckily you're feeling much better in that department.
You sigh, shrugging slightly, "I don't know what I'm doing," your eyes fall down to the duvet, knowing that if you pulled it back you'd see your bodies touching underneath, his rough and tan skin pressed against yours, soft and untouched, "I mean, I don't even know why I came tonight. I knew I didn't- that I didn't want to-" you sigh again in frustration, unable to find the right words, "I just... I missed you," your eyes travel back up to meet his, "I just wanted to be near you."
His expression softens, still stroking your cheek as he peers into your eyes, "You feel safe with me, don't you?" You nod. "You know I won't do anythin' you don't want me to do, right?" Another nod. "So it's okay to just relax when you're with me."
You grimace, "How can I relax when we're naked in bed together?"
He chuckles, dropping his hand from your face and shuffling down into the bed a bit, away from the headboard, "Okay, time for another lesson."
You feel your heart sink again, worried that he's not understanding - probably because you can't explain it right - but he smiles reassuringly at you and curls his finger slightly, urging you to follow him downwards. With a quiet inhale you slowly inch away from the headboard and further down into the bed, beneath the duvet. You both stop moving when your heads hit the pillows, laying down fully beside each other.
"Gettin' naked doesn't always mean there has to be sex," he says softly, and you watch as he very slowly brings his hand down beneath the duvet; you know where it's going before it touches you, but you still shiver when you feel his fingers brush lightly against your bare arm, "Us bein' naked in bed together doesn't mean anythin' has to happen."
"But earlier today I said..." you trail off, shaking your head, "I promised that-"
"Earlier is earlier," he brushes your arm again, tender and comforting, "Circumstances change, your day got shitty. Mine was no better. It happens."
His hand travels downward, toward the skin of your hip. He curls his palm around your bare flesh and gently massages it, thumb stroking the edge of your tummy. It's intimate and new, but somehow it feels more safe and comforting than sexual, like he's simply doing something casual, normal.
"Sometimes you just wanna lay in bed with someone" he murmurs, still touching you tenderly, "No expectations, no pressure. No nothin'. Sure, it's fun to touch each other and be together like that, but if you just wanna sleep..." his fingertips brush your back gently, then press firmly into your skin as he pulls you a bit closer toward him, "If you just wanna lay here with me, that's okay too."
You're not sure what to think, staring at him with a million different thoughts flooding your mind. Your interpretation of what men want has always been a bit of a grey area, but you've heard enough from both your family and your friends to know that most of them are just after one thing. You'd heard it from your parents your whole life who always warned about non-Christian boys and their sinful thoughts, then from the girls at college who dealt with disrespect and catcalls, men who turned on them in an instant the second they realized they weren't getting any.
Joel isn't like that. Sure, he wants sex - that's been obvious since day one, when he'd invited you inside his house within minutes of meeting you. He'd only had one thing on his mind, just like your parents had always said. But he hadn't thrown a fit when you'd said no, and up until this point he's made it abundantly clear that the ball is in your court, that it's up to you what happens between the two of you.
"I know all this stuff can be scary," he continues softly when you don't reply, "I know you're embarrassed about bein' so inexperienced, but you don't need to be. I'm here to make it easier for you; I want you to be comfortable."
He nudges forward a bit and slowly begins to wrap his arms around you, warm and inviting. You let him, body going loose and comfortable in his grasp as you feel your eyes close; safe. You feel so safe.
"You're so warm," is all you can think to say, loving the way it feels to have his broad and hairy chest pressed up against your bare breasts, his big and strong arms winding around your smaller form.
He chuckles softly and you feel him press a gentle kiss to your cheek, beard scratching your skin in your favorite way. You bring your arms up and hug him back beneath the blankets, feeling your naked thighs press firmly against his. You're aware of his cock - it's hard not to be, not when it's pressed gently against the base of your tummy, soft against your skin - but he doesn't rub himself against you or do anything to initiate more than this, more than just being together like he'd said.
He really means it, you know he does.
"I can't wait to have sex with you," you hear yourself whisper in his ear; it sounds dirty but you don't mean it to be, "I just...I'm really glad it's gonna be you."
And I'm pretty sure I'm falling for you.
--
You wake up the next morning to a firm and solid presence at your back, bare and warm and comfy. You're surprised you're awake before Joel's alarm, wondering what exactly woke you up in the first place - and then you feel it. Something wet and sticky against your lower back, something pulsing and twitching every so often against your skin.
Good morning.
He hadn't pressed his cock against you like this last night when you were cuddling, hadn't asked you to touch it or even acknowledged its presence. But sleeping Joel is an entirely different person, his big arms wrapped around you tightly, one splayed across your belly while the other holds your right breast, cups it like it's meant to fit there. He holds you in place firmly, breath at your neck, nose in your hair.
You're not sure how much time you have left before his alarm goes off. The sun is only barely starting to come up outside the window, so it could start ringing at any time now. All you know is that the sensation of having him so close to you like this, his most intimate part so close to yours, so wet and warm, it's making you all wet and warm. Your skin almost feels itchy, especially at your neck where his warm breath leaves a damp spot beneath your ear, a spot you're suddenly longing for him to kiss, to lick.
"Joel," you breathe, unable to wait any longer, scared that at any moment he'll have to leave the bed and start getting ready for work.
No response.
"Joel," you repeat, a bit louder this time, and with his name you carefully grind back against him a little bit, the wet head of his cock trailing back and forth against your warm skin. He makes a grumbling noise in his chest, pulls you in a bit closer, "Joel, wake up," you moan, painfully aware of the shape of his balls against your ass, big and heavy and suddenly the hottest thing you've ever felt in your life.
"What?" he groans, rousing from sleep, "What is it?"
It's all the confirmation of awareness you need to suddenly turn in the sheets, bring the duvet down to expose your naked bodies to the both of you. His eyes are bleary and tired as he watches you from beneath heavy eyelids, sees where your gaze has settled.
His cock lays long and thick and loose against his tummy, round tip drooling precum into the hair smattered above his belly button. God, he's so big. Your lips part, saliva filling your mouth like it had the last time you saw it, like somehow your body knows exactly what the next step is.
"I wanna put my mouth on it," you whisper, pushing your hair back behind your ears and turning your gaze back to Joel's face, "Please."
His eyebrows go up in surprise, eyelashes fluttering with sleep. He's probably wondering where this is coming from, how the girl in his bed right now is the same one who just wanted to be held last night, but he doesn't seem to be complaining. He nods quickly, stretches his arms above his head and tries to rouse himself even more from sleep.
"Of course you can, baby," he mutters huskily, voice deep and dripping with arousal, "Go ahead."
"Tell me if I'm doing something wrong," you murmur softly, and before you can even fully process what you're doing or question if you'll even be good at it, your lips are pressing against the warm heat of his wet tip.
He hisses immediately and you pull back, frightened for a moment that you've already fucked up somehow. He shakes his head quickly at you, "No, no, you're good baby, that's good," one of his hands comes down to settle against the back of your head, fingers tangling gently in your hair, "Give it a kiss, just like that."
And you do. Time is already not on your side - you feel like there's a countdown clock hanging over your head as you press another kiss in the same spot, his precum sticky on your lips. You'd thought it might be gross, had heard lots about blowjobs from your friends and how unpleasant they can be, but when your tongue darts out to carefully prod against where he's leaking, you find that it doesn't bother you that much at all.
"Tastes funny," you murmur softly, peppering a few more kisses around the wide head and then down to his shaft, thumbing the prominent vein on the underside as you do it.
"Kinda gross, huh?" you hear him say softly above you, a strained edge to his voice that makes you smile against him.
"I think I like it, actually," you admit softly, tongue darting out once again to slowly lap up a bead at the tip. You're not lying; there's something masculine and sexy and inherently Joel about it, something you hadn't been expecting.
"That's good, sweetheart," he murmurs, stroking the back of your head gently, "That's so good, angel." You don't know whether he means your opinion on the taste or simply a reaction to the things you're doing with your tongue, but either way you keep going, hoping that the alarm doesn't interrupt you.
You wrap your lips around the tip carefully, pulling it into your mouth and sucking it gently - very gently. He makes a breathless sound above you and you can't help but bring your gaze up to his face, your eyes meeting his as you swallow him down.
"That's it, that's a good girl," he breathes, thumbing a strand of hair at your temple and pushing it behind your ear, eyes dark, "Look at you."
You swirl your tongue around the tip, still making sure to keep eye contact with him as you carefully slip more of him inside your mouth. He's so big, there's absolutely no way you'll be able to fit all of him inside, at least not without some practice. He doesn't seem to mind that you can only take a little bit of him, his thumb coming downward to stroke gently at the corner of your mouth. He wipes away a bit of drool pooling there, brows furrowing.
"You're doin' so good, angel," he whispers, nodding slowly to you in reassurance as you very slowly begin to lift your head up and down, up and down, eyes going hazy, "Takin' that cock so well."
His words spur you on, encourage you to take a little bit more. You've got about half of him in your mouth and you already know you won't be able to take anymore, the spongey tip pushing dangerously close to your gag reflex. You absolutely do not want to choke, don't want to ruin this in any way. You want him to feel good. Feel better.
"Oh, honey," he groans softly when you begin to palm his balls, rolling them gently and feeling their fullness, round and heavy, "This mouth," he touches the corner of your lips again, a bit harder this time, trails his fingers downward to grip your chin, "Made to have my cock in there, huh?" his eyes are boring into yours, pupils blown wide, "You like havin' your mouth full like that, babygirl?"
You nod and whimper around his length, speeding up a little bit and never breaking eye contact with him, obsessed with watching his eyes get darker and darker, filling more and more with lust as he watches you pleasure him.
"Yeah, you do," he murmurs, voice soothing again like last night, calm and safe, "What a good girl you are, wakin' me up to suck my cock. Couldn't wait, could ya, baby?" you shake your head and the head of his cock slips past your throat a little too far, so much that you have to pull off him quickly to be sure you don't gag, "Aw, baby, that's okay," he reassures you gently, "It's a lot, I know."
Your eyes are hooded and your jaw is already starting to ache - you're not used to doing something like this and he knows it, strokes your cheek gently as he takes his cock in his hand and carefully pushes the tip against your lips.
"You just kiss it, baby," he whispers, dark and deep, "Kiss that cock 'til I come, okay?"
You do as you're told, lips parting slightly as he rubs the head of his cock against your lips and strokes himself a few more times, bringing himself close to the edge. He's so gorgeous like this, so rugged and almost animalistic as his chest heaves, groans escaping his mouth as he watches your lips. His hand is still in your hair, grip getting tighter and tighter as you lean down a bit so he can gently fuck the tip of his cock back into your mouth. Your eyes close involuntarily and you can feel your pussy throbbing against the mattress with every thrust, lips tight around him.
"Ah, fuck," he grits out suddenly, then pulls his cock away from your mouth and releases all over his chest and stomach, thighs tensing up as you watch his eyes practically roll back into his head. Your eyes are wide and attentive, locked onto the white ropes of come that spurt against his bare skin. You find yourself wondering what it would feel like at the back of your throat instead, on your tongue, what it would taste like...
Your thoughts are interrupted by Joel's alarm going off, loud and obnoxious. Before he can pull himself up to turn it off, you lean over to the nightstand and do it yourself, swiping it off and turning back to his blissed out form. He lies there panting for a moment, eyes closed. You can't help but smile, feeling pride swell in your chest again at the knowledge that you made him feel like this.
"Don't go back to sleep," you whisper softly, "You gotta go to work."
He groans then, but opens his eyes and gives you a crooked smile and a wink, expression still sleepy and satisfied, "Who needs an alarm clock when I got you, huh?" He gestures with his finger for you to move closer and you do, leaning down to press a soft kiss to his lips, "Mornin', darlin'," he murmurs against your mouth.
"Morning," you whisper back, and you revel in the smile on his face when you pull away, "Sorry for jumping your bones so early."
He just shakes his head with a wide smile, "Never apologize for jumpin' my bones, baby." His eyes fall to your naked body, settling on your pussy, still wet and aching against the sheets, "Aw, sweetheart, lemme take care of that for you."
You shake your head, pointing to his phone, "We don't have time, you gotta get to work and I gotta get home before my parents wake up," you slip out of bed and reach down to pick up the clothes you'd stripped yourself of last night before your shower. He starts to protest but you put your hand up with a soft laugh, "It's okay, Joel. I wanted to do this for you, start your day out right. Give you a chance at a good day."
He peers up at you from the bed, face smooshed into the pillow as he watches you get dressed, "Doesn't seem fair."
You just roll your eyes, pulling on your panties and shorts and pointing to his phone again, "Really, we need to hurry," you bite your lip as you slip your t-shirt over your head, "I have keys this time but I still don't wanna risk it."
"Okay, okay," he grumbles softly, "I'm goin'."
He slips out of bed and stretches, tilting his body back and forth. You both hear the way his bones crack, the noise that emits from his throat when he bends his back a certain way. You watch his expression change, going from content and sated to embarrassed and grumpy in seconds.
"And just like that, the illusion is gone," he mutters to himself, limping away from the bed and toward the door without so much as a side glance to you, clearly upset by the sudden reminder of his age. You frown, watching him go and feeling an ache in your chest that makes a home there for the rest of the morning.
--
He'd made you breakfast last time, so it's only fair that you make something for him today. Unfortunately cooking has never been your forte, so about fifteen minutes later you're waving a dish rag at the fire alarm while the sausages you'd managed to burn are smoking in the sink. Joel comes running down the stairs after his shower with a look of concern on his face, only for it to fade into one of amusement when he sees the situation.
"Now why am I teachin' you guitar when you clearly don't know how to even use a stove?"
"Oh, shut up," you can't even pretend to be mad at him, grin spreading across your face as you shake your head and breathe a sigh of relief when the alarm stops going off, "Help me clean this up."
You end up making toast instead.
"You know, we've still got about ten minutes," he says across from you at the table as you eat, peering down at his watch quickly.
"Yeah, 'cause I fail as a cook," you mutter, making a face at your slice of toast, "I was gonna do eggs too, you know."
"Let's not reach for the stars too quickly now," he says with a sly smile, putting his hand up quickly when you prepare to retort, "Anyway, that's not what I meant."
"What did you-" you look up from your toast and see him beckoning you toward him again like he had last night, finger curling toward himself with a sly smile on his face.
You look at the clock on the oven, biting your lip.
"It'll take five minutes tops," he says, and you raise your eyebrow at him.
"Really?" you challenge, "Five minutes?"
"Five minutes."
That, you'd like to see. Dropping your toast back onto the plate, you stand up and walk to the other side of the table, unsure what exactly he wants you to do. He spreads his legs a bit, points to his thigh.
"Sit here, babygirl," he says, voice low and hypnotic, "Wanna show you somethin' new."
Yes please.
You situate yourself on his lap, one leg going between his thighs while the other dangles carefully off the other side of the chair. He pulls you down, big hands coming up to palm your hips and hold you there firmly. You swallow tightly, unsure exactly what he has in mind.
"You know what feels really good?" he murmurs, thumbs slowly stroking the bare skin between your shirt and your shorts.
"What?" you whisper, peering down into his eyes with intrigue.
"This," he says softly, then very slowly begins to move your hips, dragging you carefully back and forth along his thigh. Your eyebrows shoot up, lips parting as you feel the ache in your core immediately return, the pressure of his thigh and the movement of his hands setting your nerves alight.
He looks down at his own handiwork, watches as he moves you back and forth, back and forth, rocking you over and over again until you're whimpering in his lap, your hands coming up to grip his shoulders. He just smiles up at you, doesn't stop his movements.
"Yeah, that feels good, doesn't it?" he breathes, watching your expression closely, "Feels good to finally have somethin' touchin' that pussy, huh baby?"
You moan at his words, hands slipping from his shoulders to wrap around him as you lean forward to bury your face in his neck. He just starts to move you faster, chuckling softly to himself when your hips buck against him. It's amazing how such a simple action can feel so fucking good, the constant stimulation against your clit through layers of material making you writhe and whimper.
He removes one of his hands from your hips and slips it inside the leg of your shorts, fingertips tickling your inner thigh gently. You grapple onto him even tighter, hugging him like a koala as his thumb slowly begins to stroke you through the wet spot of your panties.
"Couldn't stop thinkin' about this pussy yesterday," he murmurs, thumb rubbing your clit over and over in little circles, "Those pictures were so filthy, baby."
You moan against his shoulder, gripping him tighter as his thumb begins to pick up speed. He presses a kiss to your neck, wet and hot; it makes your eyes roll back.
"And this little hole," he murmurs in your ear, suddenly adding a finger inside your shorts to circle your entrance slowly, "Kept thinkin' about this tiny little hole, all open for me."
God, when he talks like that you can't even fucking think, brain running on autopilot as he pulls you impossibly closer and lets you bare down on his thigh, his finger and thumb trapped under your weight, pressed firmly against your core.
"Who's gonna fill up that hole, babygirl?" he whispers in your ear, soft and secret, "Huh? Who's that hole belong to?"
"You," you whimper into his shoulder, eyes shut tight as he strokes his finger up and down through the fabric, adding even more pressure to the overwhelming sensations you're already feeling "It's yours, Mr. Miller."
"And what's gonna go inside it, sweetheart?"
"Hnhng," you can't speak, inhaling shakily as Joel's other hand presses harder against your hip and continues to guide you, fucking you back and forth against his thigh. He just watches you, eyes dark, lips parted, brow furrowed.
"Words, babygirl," he reminds you softly, "Use your words. What's gonna go inside that tight little hole? Huh? Tell me."
"Y-your cock."
"That's right," he murmurs, the tip of his finger prodding inside you gently, taking the damp material of your panties with it, "Gonna fill you up so deep with my cock, honey. You're gonna feel it right here," he moves his hand up and places it at the base of your belly, pushes against it softly, "Gonna be so big inside you, sweet girl."
Oh fuck.
"I want it so bad," you groan, wrapping your arms even tighter around him, "I need it Mr. Miller."
"You do need it," he agrees softly as he kisses the top of your head, bringing his hand back down from your belly to guide you again, moving you back and forth "Need to be fucked so bad, don't you baby? Til you can't even think straight."
You nod frantically, continuing to grind yourself down against his thigh over and over and over, "Please," you whimper, almost a squeak, "Please, Mr. Miller."
"Shh," he soothes, pulling you in closer and moving your hips against him, looking at you with those big brown eyes full of lust and safety, "I will, babygirl. Soon. I'll fuck you so good, honey. I promise." Your body hitches in his lap as you near the edge, eyes going wide and mouth popping open as your orgasm starts to hit you, "Yeah? You like thinkin' about that, huh? Me fuckin' this soaked little pussy into my mattress? Fillin' you up so deep you can feel me in your stomach?"
You can't hold on anymore, eyes shutting tight and high pitched whimpers flowing past your lips as you start to come. He pins you against his thigh, holds you there tight and firm as your pussy pulses and throbs through his pants. You lean forward to bury your face in his neck as you ride it out, feel his hand press against your back.
"Oh, good girl, that's it, baby," he murmurs, kissing your temple gently and stroking your back in little circles, "Come all over my lap, sweetheart. Show me how wet she can get, there you go. Good girl."
After a moment of catching your breath and willing yourself to pull your face away from his neck, you both bring your attention to the clock on the stove - five minutes have passed.
"Told ya," he murmurs, pulling you into one more hug, hitching his chin over your shoulder and rubbing your back gently as your head lolls against him.
You're too blissed out to tease him back.
--
The arrivals gate isn't as busy as you'd expected, thankfully. You lean against your car a few hours later, still reeling from your morning with Joel as you wait for Tasha to show up. You'd told him about your weekend plans before you'd left, insisting that despite spending time with Tasha you'd still be attending your Saturday lesson.
"Can't wait," he'd murmured to you, low and deep in your ear after giving you one final kiss at the door, "Got somethin' real special planned, babygirl."
You'd practically melted down his front steps.
"THERE'S MY FAVORITE SLUT!!" you suddenly hear someone shout, and you look up to see Tasha at the sliding doors, bags dropping to the ground as she sprints at you head on and collides with you seconds later, wrapping her arms around you tightly.
She's just the same as she was the last time you saw her, high spirited and excitable and sweet, practically vibrating in your arms with joy. Only she could rock a bright purple cowboy hat and sweatpants, not to mention the lime green flip flops.
"Oh my god," you gasp in her ear, hugging her back and spinning on the spot, "You're insane."
"I'M EXCITED!" she squeals, pulling away from you and clapping her hands together, "We're going out tonight!!! Together!!! For the first time ever!" She brings her hands up and places one on either side of your face, lips turning down into a pout, "My baby bird is leaving the nest," she sighs dreamily, shaking her head, "I never thought this day would come."
"Please get in the car," you laugh, popping the trunk and gesturing to her bags, "before I change my mind and send you back."
--
You give Tasha the complete run-down on Joel as you get ready at the Airbnb, updating her on everything that's happened since you'd last checked in. It feels so good to actually talk about it, not text or simply mull it over and over in your head. She gasps at all the right spots, makes ridiculous faces in the mirror as she curls her hair, nearly drops the curling iron on the floor when you tell her about this morning.
"AND YOU LIKED HOW IT TASTED?" she practically screams, running out of the room and then running back in like she has no idea what to do with herself, "Oh my god, you are down bad. Jesus Christ," she makes a face, "Sorry, I mean- uh, fuck."
"Tasha," you roll your eyes, "You can say Jesus Christ."
"I can?" her eyes widen and she sighs in relief, picking up the curling iron from the floor, "Thank god."
You're going clubbing tonight for the very first time; a night of dancing and cocktails and flirting and living out all the college dreams you still have yet to experience. You're a bit tentative about the flirting part though, a concept that floors Tasha immediately.
"You can't go clubbing and not flirt," she says with faux shock, spinning in front of you as she assesses her dress in the mirror, "It's the best part!"
"I have a-" you cut yourself off, making a face at your reflection.
"You do not have a boyfriend," Tasha says immediately, "There has been no definition, babe. You need to keep reminding yourself of that."
"But it's not just fucking," you argue with a grimace, "I mean, it's not even fucking at all, we still haven't taken that step yet."
"I know, I just don't want you to get your heart hurt, honey," she frowns, leaning toward the mirror and applying some lipstick, "Boys are mean."
"Well, Joel's not a boy," you say quietly, fingering the hem of your own dress, a short and cute pink number that Tasha had brought specifically for you to wear, "He's a man."
"Mmhm, so you keep telling me," she raises an eyebrow, "I think I need to see this man for myself. Give you my honest opinion, see if he's really this gorgeous, perfect hunk you make him out to be."
You bite your lip, trying not to smile as you think back to this morning, how he'd looked in the early morning light, naked and sleepy and beautiful. And all yours.
"He is," you murmur softly.
--
You're supposed to be going clubbing, supposed to be out dancing and drinking cocktails and living out all your college dreams for once in your life. But where are you instead?
"O'Neil's!!" Tasha says excitedly, pointing to the red neon sign outside the bar you've just arrived at, throwing you a shit-eating grin that just makes you playfully roll your eyes.
You never should have told her the name of the bar Joel frequents, because she's now made it her mission to find him, get a good look at him and judge for herself if he's really all you're making him out to be. It's your own fault, you suppose, considering that you don't have any pictures of him or any frame of reference to articulate exactly the way he looks. For Tasha he's shrouded in mystery, but not for much longer.
Your ears are already ringing when you get inside the bar, the chatter and buzz of other people's conversations flooding your thoughts. You're not used to being out like this, being around drunk people or high people or literally anyone whose ideal night out is spending time at a bar. It's nerve-wracking and you instantly feel like a fish out of water, gripping onto Tasha's arm after showing your ID to a man who ogled both of you way more than he needed to.
"So this is where he hangs out," Tasha says, assessing her surroundings and leading you towards the bar where most people seem to be gathered, "Quaint. Little divey. Definitely not for our crowd but hey, we're learning new things tonight." She taps the counter and tilts her head toward the bartender with a smile, "Watcha got on tap?"
You wrinkle your nose, "I thought we'd be having cocktails."
"Oh we will at the club, don't you worry. But if we want the authentic dive bar experience, beer is necessary," the bartender lists the options and Tasha orders, though you barely hear what either of them are saying over the loud music and conversations. Your eyes scan the bar for any sign of Joel, but people are packed so tightly in here that it's hard to really see anybody, faces and bodies melding together.
The bartender hands Tasha the drinks and she throws him a wink, "Thank you, darling."
You envy how easily she navigates a situation like this, so natural and graceful despite her surroundings that are anything but. She hands your beer to you with a smile and holds hers up in front of her, tilting it toward yours until they clink.
"To you finally coming out with me," she toasts with a grin, "It's about damn time."
You smile back and take a sip, trying your hardest not to wince at the bitter flavor. It's not like you've never tried alcohol before, you just already know that you hate beer.
"Delicious," you lie, and Tasha just laughs and gestures toward a suddenly empty booth in the corner of the room.
"Let's sit there while we suss him out," she mutters to you, pulling you along with her and slipping inside, "Now, what's he look like? You've been pretty vague about those details." She waggles her eyebrows, "Be honest, is he bald?"
You almost spit out your second sip, shaking your head furiously, "No, he's not bald. Full head of hair."
She puts her hands up in defense, "Hey, it's not that crazy to assume!"
You just shake your head and laugh, turning back toward the bar and the people and trying to get a gage on where he might be. You know he usually comes here with his contracting crew, but what the hell does a contracting crew even look like?
"Help me out, gimme a description!" Tasha says eagerly, wiggling in her seat a bit and following your gaze, "He has facial hair, right?"
"Yes, it's kinda messy and scruffy," you bite your lip, squinting a bit as if that'll help you.
"And what's his hair color?"
You don't look at her as you reply, "Um.. grey."
Tasha's hand slaps down on the table and you jump, eyes going wide as you turn back to her, "What?"
"Grey? Girl, how old is he?" she doesn't sound angry or judgmental - she sounds intrigued. And almost... impressed? You gnaw on your lip, scrunching your eyebrows together as you look back toward the crowd of people.
"Um... he's..." you stop short, freezing when your eyes land on a familiar shirt near the bar, a red and black plaid button down that you'd seen only hours ago, "There! He's there!" You point at him quickly, ducking your head a bit and motioning for Tasha to lean in closer to get a good look.
"Oh... my god," she breathes, and you feel a rush of pride at her response, unable to stop the grin from plastering itself to your face as you peer at him.
There's something different about him that you can't place - maybe it's just because you haven't seen him in a public place like this, aren't used to what he looks like when it's not just the two of you. You try to put your finger on it, and while you're doing so he does something that makes your heart positively swell in your chest.
He smiles. That beautiful crooked smile that pulled you in the day you met him, set your skin on fire and brought you to the point of no return. Those crinkly eyes, the grey in his beard, the softness of his eyes, they send that familiar feeling of safety rushing through your bones. And you realize there's nothing different about him at all. That's your Joel, sitting on a bar stool after a long day of work, nursing a glass of whisky and chatting about his day. He's the same Joel who you'd woken up with this morning, just in a different setting.
You're so distracted by his rugged beauty out in the open like this - overwhelmed by his charm and his smile - that it takes you a few seconds to see who exactly he's smiling at.
You feel your heart in your throat.
There's a woman sitting beside him. Not just beside him, but so close their stools are touching, so close her legs - long and lean and beautiful - are brushing his. It's not subtle the way her ankle moves against his calf, up and down, up and down. She's wearing jean shorts and a halter top, skin dark and gorgeous and exposed in all the right places, beautiful brown braids cascading down her back and shoulders. You can't see her face but you already know she could be a model. She probably is.
No. No, something isn't right.
Maybe it's not him.
Time feels like it's frozen, like everyone in the bar has stopped moving except the two of them, like a giant spotlight is shining directly on where they sit, where they touch, where they smile at each other. Because it is him. It's him in all his gorgeous Joel glory, peering into the eyes of a woman who isn't you, a woman who's probably more his type, closer to his age, a woman who's somehow making him smile like that when she shouldn't. That's how he smiles at you. That's your smile.
A woman who's now leaning in for a kiss.
No. Please no.
A woman who he kisses back.
This isn't happening. This isn't real. This is just some sick and twisted nightmare you're about to wake up from at any second.
His hand comes up to cup her face.
"I'm gonna throw up," is all you manage to gasp out to Tasha as you yank yourself from the booth and sprint out of the bar, hand splaying across your belly as you bend over and release the contents of your stomach all over the sidewalk.
You feel Tasha's hand on your back, pulling your hair behind your ears. She's saying something but you don't understand it, ears continuing to ring despite being outside in the cool air, away from the loud music and chatty conversations, away from them.
"Oh honey," you finally hear her say, soft and kind as she rubs circles into your back, a comforting action that brings no comfort to you, not now, not after what you've just seen. "I'm so sorry."
2K notes · View notes
ham1lton · 5 days
Text
PARTY IN THE U.S.A!
pairings: charles leclerc x actress!reader.
faceclaim: rachel mcadams.
summary: before the miami grand prix, o/s posts you and charles goes on a journey to find you. too bad that time has plans of its own.
author’s note: the request said you wanted to have reader be introduced to charles through another driver’s gf but because i’m egotistical, i chose to link this to the nepo sister universe. so they meet through o/s. also i changed it up slightly! this can be read independently of the nsu but it’ll be more enjoyable if you read the other works.
wanna get tagged in any future works? sign up for my taglist! <3
Tumblr media
liked by zendaya, charles_leclerc and 1,827,627 others.
oldersister: our new film ‘material girl’ is now out! enjoy my cameo in my best friend’s film! so proud of her and the most incredible team who worked with us to create this incredible film. thank you for allowing me to be a part of this 💕
neposisreader: a smile might be good.
-> oldersister: nothing to smile about in my life.
-> neposisreader: i already apologised for bringing lando to dinner without a warning!
user3: running to the cinema to watch this!
user1: so jealous of her life icl.
user4: no cause i had no clue o/s and y/n are childhood besties?! this changes everything.
user5: the two pretty best friends everyone has been looking for.
landonorris: whooo look at my sister in law 🥳
-> oldersister: blocking you immediately actually.
-> landonorris: WAIT !! 😩😭
user6: what’s charles doing here in the likes 🤨
-> user7: he’s friends with o/s. that’s probably all there is to it.
Tumblr media
————————————————————————
Tumblr media
liked by oldersister, neposisreader and 2,383,733 others.
yourusername: i had the best time working with the most magnificent group of people on this movie. ‘material girl’ is currently out! i had the opportunity to work with the best and make something truly unforgettable. keep an eye out for my bestie’s cameo! also my niece came to come visit me on set. my favourite gift <3
neposisreader: mrs fluffkins is evil.
-> yourusername: she’s an angel!
-> oldersister: exactly! thank you!!
-> yourusername: you know i got you bestie 😘
user1: you look so good in this shade of blonde!
user2: brb running to get my regina george halloween costume.
user3: charles liking y/n related posts? hmmm 🤨 you not slick baby.
*liked by landonorris.*
————————————————————————
Tumblr media
————————————————————————
Tumblr media
————————————————————————
Tumblr media
————————————————————————
Tumblr media
liked by charles_leclerc, ynshoney and 234,672 others
ynswife: our girl y/n dropped to the jimmy fallon show to spill all the gossip about her newest film, her love of miami and her best friend oldersister.
user1: i love her tan and this hair on her!
-> user2: she’s always so happy and bubbly after spending time with o/s. that’s truly her girl.
user3: i watched material girl with my best friends and i almost cried at the end when regina had her big speech. i love y/n’s acting sm.
-> user4: she’s going to be in the david fincher adaptation of gone girl! so excited for her! she’s gonna kill it!
user8: did you guys notice how she stayed silent when the topic of her love life came up? she’s always so quick to mention she’s single….
-> user9: when she comes out as dating o/s >>>>
-> user17: when the doctors come back with your tests and legally diagnose you with delusional tendencies >>>
-> user12: what if she’s dating charles?? he’s been interacting with a lot of her accounts recently…
-> user7: i’m gonna put my hand on yours when i say this okay? that’s not happening beloved.
Tumblr media
liked by oldersister, neposisreader and 1,627,892 others.
yourusername: miami i lovee youu 😘
oldersister: when did you take that pic of us?
-> yourusername: the lady behind us took it! she sent it to me through airdrop <3 you looked so cute i had to post it.
-> user1: they’re 100% dating.
-> user2: nah they’re definitely friends.
user3: WHO IS THE GUY IN THE THIRD PIC?
-> user4: it’s her costar! the proportions match!
-> charles_leclerc: no it isn’t. lol.
Tumblr media
————————————————————————
Tumblr media
liked by yourusername, landonorris and 1,037,637 others.
charles_leclerc: here is my ‘hard launch’ and now that i’ve got your attention. go watch my amazing talented girlfriend in her newest movie ‘material girl’.
oldersister: i still don’t like this.
-> landonorris: charles and i are in-laws now 😘
-> oldersister: who unblocked you from my instagram???
-> landonorris: WAIT NO 😭
user1: yasss watch this masterpiece of a movie!!
*liked by charles_leclerc.*
user2: king of promotion. y/n needs to get him a job in the marketing department.
danielricciardo: watched this film five times and if you saw me cry… no i didn’t.
user3: they’re actually so cute together?? this is growing on me.
yourusername: approved ✔️
-> charles_leclerc: just jumped in joy 😍‼️
408 notes · View notes
gtgbabie0 · 11 months
Text
Tumblr media
Forever in my heart
{Just a cute moment between you, Cregan and your son}
I love him sm!! Hope you enjoy! 🤭💕
⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆ ⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆ ⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆ ⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆ ⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆
Cregan's heart blooms with love, warmth expanding within his chest as he watches you with soft eyes. You’re sitting on the bed, furs beneath you with your legs crisscrossed as you look down at your son, Brandon Stark, his arms stretched out as he lays before you, his tiny hands grabbing at nothing as he gurgles up at you.
There’s a look in your eyes that has Cregan feeling all choked up, he isn’t quite sure what it is exactly, but it’s full of love and amazement as if you couldn’t quite believe your child was here. He watches as the back of your finger brushes gently across his cheeks, smiling when he blabbers at you.
“How is he?” He whispers, carefully shutting the door to your shared bedchambers so as to not disturb his son. You beam up at Cregan, a giant smile splays across your lips, and even despite your exhausted expression he still thinks you’re the most beautiful person he’s ever met.
You pat the space next to you happily, urging him to sit next to you, and he gladly does. “He’s perfect,” you say, your tone hushed. You smile as you feel his big hand soothing your lower back with a pressure that has you sighing with pleasure.
“He is, just like his mother,” he says, gently kissing your hairline. He looks down at his son, chuckling at the way he kicks his legs up in the air, “Strong too”
He admires your strength, and how you still insist on caring for your son by yourself through everything. It warms him immensely to know you care so deeply, then again, he didn’t expect anything else from you.
You turn to him with a grateful smile, your fingers running along his stubbled jaw before you press a kiss to the corner of his mouth, “Just like his father” you say, leaning your head against his shoulder. You watch as his thumb gently smoothes over Brandon's soft cheek, giggling when your son smiles, his eyes wide and bright, full of wonder.
The sight has your heart clenching in your ribcage, how Cregan is so gentle, the love that flashes through his eyes as your son's little hand wraps around Cregan’s fingers.
Then he gurgles something that sounds a lot like ‘mama’ but it’s not quite correct, and you grab at your husband’s hand with an excited gasp. He chuckles at the shock that takes over your soft expression.
“Can you say, Mama?” You giggle, fingers gently tickling his sides as Brandon lets out an excited squeal, and the sudden noise has Cregan chuckling.
You try to get him to say it five more times but to no avail, as he only lets out incoherent gurgles, blowing raspberries before laughing, kicking his legs wildly as he does. It causes a warmth to spread across your chest and it feels like you’re melting.
“So close lovely, so close” Cregan teases, nudging your shoulder ever so gently. He looks down at Brandon, pushing back the dark tuff of hair that curls over his forehead.
Cregan feels his heart beam as his son looks over at him, his dark brown eyes glistening under the glow of the fire and he mumbles something that sounds dangerously close to ‘papa’
“Traitor” you gasp with a chuckle, looking down at your son with soft eyes. Cregan takes your hand in his, pressing a kiss to your knuckles as he smiles.
“Thank you” he whispers, gaining your attention, “Thank you for everything,” you notice the tears that start to build up in his eyes, his tone so soft that it leaves you breathless.
You wiggle your hand from his to cup his jaw, thumb grazing against the stubble, as he looks at you with those pretty eyes of his, “I love you, so much” he looks down at his son, his hand gently holding his tiny one, “Both of you” and you swear, you could live forever in this quiet moment.
⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆ ⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆ ⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆ ⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆ ⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆
1K notes · View notes
bethsvrse · 2 months
Note
Hey do you take requests for Timothee Chalamet? if so I'd love one where he's sick from eating too much chocolate on the Wonka set and the female reader takes care of him
Tumblr media
PAIRING Timothee Chalamet x fem!reader
A/N I love Timmy sm, hope you enjoy it!!!
WARNINGS mentions of vomiting/over eating. Shitty dialogue.
Tumblr media
There were groans coming from the bathroom, waking you up from your sleep. You rubbed your eyes tiredly as you reach over and grab your phone from you bedside table. Turning it on, you winced at the light, quickly turning down your brightness. Once that was done, you checked the time.
4:27 am. A ghastly time for anyone to be awake. You turned off your phone and went to go snuggle back into Timothee, only to realise that he’s not there, which causes you to also realise the reason why you awake.
Another groan came from the bathroom. You sighed as you stood up out of bed and curiously walked toward the ensuite. Opening the door, you were once again, blinded by a light. Blinking away the brightness, you looked around the bathroom only to find Timmy leaning over the toilet.
You suddenly felt more awake, and you immediately kneeled down next to him, pushing his hair back. Timmy groaned again before vomiting once more. You rubbed his back in sympathy, “it’s okay baby, let it out.”
Timothee groaned as he pulled his head out of the toilet, “go back to bed, Y/N/N. I’m okay.”
You rolled your eyes. You knew Timothee had an issue with letting people help him. Being with him for 3 years, you can’t count the amount of times you tried to help him with things and him denying the help.
“Timmy, your obviously not okay. Please just let me help.” You tell him as you cup his face with your hands. He puts his hands on top of yours as he nods slowly, before gagging and throwing up in the toilet once more. You stand up and walk over to the sink to wash your hands. After you do that, you grab a face washer from one of the drawers and wet it.
You walk back over to Timmy with the washer in hand. He looks up at you and you almost cry with how much pain he looks to be in. You give him a small smile as you wipe his face. You flush the toilet, and stand up once more. “I’ll be back in a second, okay baby?” You tell him, only receiving a small nod in return.
You walk out of your guys bedroom and into the kitchen to grab a bucket. When you return, you see Timmy leaning against the bathroom door with a frown on his face. You give him a small smile before placing the bucket next to his side on the bed. “Did you brush your teeth?” You ask him and he nodded, crawling into bed with you. He snuggles his face into your chest before wrapping his arms around your waist.
“When did you start throwing up?” You question.
“I don’t know.” Timmy tells you. “I first threw up yesterday morning, but today my stomach is just not agreeing with me. I threw up twice before you came to help me.” He says.
You rub his back in sympathy. “Maybe it’s from all the chocolate you’ve been eating. I noticed you only had dinner on Monday but go through like, several packets of chocolate.”
Timothee looks deep in thought before agreeing with you, “your probably right…”
“I always am.” You tell him with a small laugh before getting comfortable yourself. “Maybe you should lay off chocolates for a few weeks.”
“Yeah, probably.” He mutters. You can feel Timmy’s body start to relax before you hear small snores from him. Leaning over, you turn off your bedside light, before falling asleep yourself.
Tumblr media
A/N call me Bill Denbrough cause I dont know how to end a story!!!! 🤙
hoped you liked it though anon 💕
232 notes · View notes
ilwonuu · 10 days
Note
Can I request reader having a sexy dream and texting bf Jungwon about it and she’s so needy so she shows up at the dorms while the other boys are there and shows up at the dorms while the other boys are there. She immediately drags Jungwon to his room and they start making out, he’s rlly shy because he’s never done anything like this before. She’s on his lap and starts grinding on him and he gets hard for the first time with her and gets really embarrassed but reader is OBVIOUSLY into it and gives him a handjob and he just cums sm all over her.
anon,,,, this request will be the death of me (good death obvi) this is too good omg. i hope you like<3 thank you for requesting!!!!
boy, i want you.
↬ yang jungwon
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
꧁ pairing- nonidol!jungwon x fem!reader, switch!jungwon x switch!reader, established relationship.
꧁ warnings- making out, handjob, pet names, affection, jungwon is shy<3, reader is needy for him and he is the same for her!!!, lmk what else
꧁ a/n- i loved writing this because jungwon is my bias in enhypen!!!! so when i saw this request you know i was excited to write for him.. lmk what u guys thought please<333
Tumblr media
you just woke up from a dream you never wanted to wake up from. your boyfriend was touching you in ways you want more than anything. you woke up with a pooling feeling between your thighs, squeezing them together mindlessly. you sigh grabbing your phone thinking if you should text him or not. your finger lingers overs his contact as you decide to finally text him.
you- wonnie? are you still awake?
wonnie🐱💕- yea of course!! just watching a movie with the guys. what’s up?
you- i had a dream.. i can’t stop think about you. can i come over?
wonnie🐱💕- oh?? was the dream dirty?
you- maybe.. is that okay?
wonnie🐱💕- yea.. more than okay. you can come over btw. sorry i didn’t answer your question.
you- are you thinking about dirty things now wonnie?
wonnie🐱💕- uh maybe. but when are you coming?
you- right now.
you roll out of bed quickly, grabbing your jacket practically running to your car. you make your way to jungwons dorm with butterflies in your stomach. you finally arrive, walking quickly up the stairs.
you knock feeling your butterflies come back. jungwon opens the door with a big smile. “you got here quick.” he pulls you inside with a smile.
“you came at the perfect time. we just finished the movie.” he says as you hug him. “hi guys!” you wave to the three boys on the couch.
“i didn’t know you were coming over.” jake says with a smile. you laugh pulling jungwon to his room. jay and sunoo waving to you as you walk away with your boyfriend. you finally close the door after you two.
“wha-“ you cut him off pulling him to immediately start kissing him. pushing him back on his bed. he kisses you back softly as a little blush creeps against his cheek. you grab his face to make out with him harder.
he lets a small gasp slip so you slide your tongue into his mouth. he moans slightly into the kiss as he feels his cheeks heat up some more. you pull away panting slightly looking down at him with a smile. he looks away from you as his face gets redder.
“why won’t you look at me? you’re too cute.” you say kissing his cheek as you straddle him. he sits up straight still not making eye contact with you.
“i- i haven’t done that before- i don’t know if i was good- or-“ you shake your head. “it was good wonnie. i love kissing you.” you grab his face to look at you as you say the last words to him.
“i-i love kissing you too.” he looks into your eyes now still blushing at your touch. “can i kiss you again?” you ask looking at his lips. he nods quickly. you pull him to kiss you again. his kissing back this time is more needy as you slip your tongue into his mouth.
you start to grind down onto him. he moans at the pleasure but gasps at the new feeling. you grab his face as you grind down harder against him. you feel him get hard under you causing you to pull away from the kiss as you continue to grind against him. he tries to look away from you but you shake your head.
“what’s wrong?” you ask kissing his cheek again. his breathing is fast as he tries to catch it. “u-uh this- is embarrassing- i haven’t-“ he looks in between you guys trying not to moan as your hips move against his still.
“f-feels good.” he whispers to you still grind slowly. he doesn’t look you in the eyes though. he still feels embarrassed to be so close to you. he doesn’t know how you seem so calm. he feels like he’s gonna explode. he feels so warm under your touch.
“can i make you feel even better?” you kiss his neck gently leaving a couple kisses. he looks at you nervously but nods slowly. you get off his lap sitting next to him.
“can i take these off?” you tug at his pants and he just nods. he can’t form any words or look at you without blushing. you take his sweatpants off him leaving him in his boxers.
you palm him through his boxers as you pull him into another kiss. he groans into the kiss slightly. he tries to bite back another groan when you slide his dick out of his boxers.
“this okay wonnie?” you ask as you wrap your hand around it. he nods with a shudder as you start to move your hand. “y/n- o-oh-“ he throws his head back slightly as you move your hand faster.
“feel good wonnie?” he groans at the question trying to hide his face. he doesn’t want you to see how much he’s enjoying this. “baby use your words.” you kiss his lips again as you start to speed your hand. “mm it’s so g-good.” he still tries to hide his face a little more. you want to see his face though.
“wonnie- don’t hide i want to see you.” you kiss his neck as you focus on his pleasure. he finally gives up on hiding himself. his moans are turning more desperate as you speed your hand up.
“i-i think- shit im gonna cum.” he gets redder when the words leave his mouth. you just smirk to yourself as you pull his shirt off over his head. “cum for me wonnie.” you whisper into his ear as you plant a kiss against it. “a-ah fuck-“
his hips buck a little into your hand as white ropes paint your hand and his chest. you milk him through his orgasm as he moans your name. his cum everywhere as he catches his breath.
“you came so much wonnie- was it good?” you kiss his lips after you question him. he nods blushing again as he can’t look at you. “look at me wonnie.” he blushes a little making full eye contact with you.
“you did so good for me.” you smile kissing his lips again as you get something to wipe him off. “t-thank you.” he smiles slightly as you clean him off.
“can i stay over tonight wonnie?” you ask as you see him start to dress himself again. “of course- i would love you too.” he gains a bit of his confidence back no longer feeling as embarrassed. you smile pulling him into a kiss seeing his face heat up again.
“you’re so cute when you’re nervous.” you squeeze his cheeks making him laugh a little. “stoppp-“ he blushes as he pushes you away playfully.
196 notes · View notes
gorgeouslypink · 9 months
Note
HIIII PINK!!! When I heard you were leaving I was so sad I even started crying and started to doubt myself on entering the void. I was like “how tf am I going to get into the void without pink???” I started procrastinating reading some of your post basically stalking ur page staying up til 4 in the morning (I was desperate 😭). I realized that I already read all of ur post, nd I just was surprised on how much time I wasted trying to get into the void. And I always dreamt abt putting a success story in your inbox. I already had all the knowledge i needed so what’s the point of more? I deleted tumblr and thought of anything that could help me get in the void. I did SATS while listening to my subliminal playlist, i daydreamed abt the void and my desires for fun, i affirmed for my void concept randomly throughout the day, feeling of the wish fulfilled, listened to delta waves when I was abt to sleep, and I meditated once a day for 10 mins. Meditation was optional but whateva 🤷‍♀️. I ONLY DID THAT FOR THREE FREAKING DAYS. And Im still mad at myself for wasting time procrastinating for 9 months. I was going to take a nap and I was in a drowsy state, so might as well affirm for the void right? I started saying affs like “I’m in the void”, etc etc. Once I started affirming, everything was just calm Yk? My body wanted to move but it was like it couldn’t cause the state I was in was calm asf. So I closed my eyes and just repeated the affs in my head over and over and over until I got this feeling like as if my body was floating, then I payed attention to it for a split second then ignored It after. I kept on affirming then I felt like I was being pulled then let go and it was as if I was falling. Everything got darker and quieter. So then I got scared and jumped because that scared me soo bad (I’m a easy person to scare 😔). After that, I felt like I was actually a master at the void, I took a nap again and I had the same feeling but when I felt like I fell I kept my calm. Then I couldn’t hear my fan which was louddd, I opened my eyes to total darkness, I was scared for two seconds and realized I was in the void!! Ngl I had a whole list set up with my desires and I was ready to affirm and goooo!!! But I realized how calm the void is and stayed there for what felt like 5 minutes. I did affirm I had all my desires and that I was able to wake up in the void under 5 seconds. When I woke up from the void it was 9 pm and I took a nap at 2!!! I woke up with all of my desires nd shi. (I would explain in more detail in how I got in and stuff like that but I was in a rush and didn’t want to make this too long 😀)
BUT THANK YOU SMM PINK, IM GOING TO MISS U SM. YOU HAVE BEEN A REALLY BIG HELP WITH MY VOID JOURNEY, I TRULY APPRECIATE EVERYTHING U HAVE DONE FOR THIS COMMUNITY, MAKE SURE TO ENJOY UR SELF 💗💗💖💖💖💗💕
✌️😼
Hi love!!! Omgosh I'm so proud of you! This is so cute and you deserve this so much and I'm genuinely happy for you. 💗
748 notes · View notes
7000f1 · 2 years
Text
Tumblr media
we popping a bottle tonight fellas
3 notes · View notes
bbyjackie · 8 months
Text
𝐒𝐎𝐂𝐈𝐀𝐋𝐒 𝐀𝐒 𝐒𝐀𝐁𝐎'𝐒 𝐆𝐅 — ♡
one piece social media + dating feat: sabo
》 asl brothers completed
Tumblr media
♡ liked by lalalakoala, nicorobin and 5.3k others
_ynln: ur gf or ramen, pick one
tagged: saaaa_bo
saaaa_bo: the answer is obvious
↳ saaaa_bo: ramen 🙏
↳ ace: wrong.
↳ ace: the correct answer is me 🤩🤩
↳ marco_o: said absolutely no one
↳ _ynln: @saaaa_bo surely this is grounds for a break up 🫤
lalalakoala: okay we get it, you have a boyfriend
p1rateking_luffy: YOU GUYS GOT RAMEN WITHOUT ME?????!!!!??! ☹️☹️
↳ _ynln: sorry luf, i'll bring you next time!
↳ saaaa_bo: no wtf we are not bringing luffy, i'm gonna go broke and he's gonna eat our share
↳ ace: im gonna have to agree with sabo
↳ p1rateking_luffy: 🙁
↳ lovenami: nah sabo you're so real for that (liked by saaaa_bo)
↳ marco_o: @ace you are literally the LAST person who can say that
Tumblr media Tumblr media
♡ liked by blackleg.sanji, nefertari_vivi and 6.9k others
_ynln: applications for a new bf linked in my bio.
[music: traitor - Olivia Rodrigo ♫]
tagged: saaaa_bo
blackleg.sanji: I APPLIED ‼️‼️‼️
blackleg.sanji: HOW MANY CAN I SEND IN?!
blackleg.sanji: WILL I BE NOTIFIED IF I MAKE IT IN THE WAITLIST?
↳ theroronoa.zoro: the only notification you're gonna get is one from the police
saaaa_bo: WOWW JUST CAUSE I CHOSE RAMEN OVER YOU 🤨🤨
↳ _ynln: girls gotta do what she's gotta do
↳ _ynln: OMG SABO YOU APPLIED? I LOVE YOU SO MUCH OMG STOP 💗💗
↳ saaaa_bo: wtv loser.
lovenami: omg you should've made them transfer you five dollars to apply
↳ _ynln: nami ur trying to pimp me out huh 😭🫵
lovenami: you're so gorg yn. (liked by saaaa_bo)
↳ _ynln: i miss u sm namiiii 💕
nefertari_vivi: OMG STOP UR SO PRETTY I LOVE UUU
↳ _ynln: 😭💕
ace: why is everyone happy EXCEPT ME (liked by saaaa_bo)
↳ marco_o: give me five minutes and i'll dm u a list of reasons (liked by _ynln, saaa_bo, p1rateking_luffy)
Tumblr media
♡ liked by ace, lalalakoala and 11 others
priv.ynn: blocking him on this acc so he doesn't see this but omg this is so cute, koala caught him trying to buy gifts for me <333
ace: yo wtf why isn't he getting me prada 🤨
ace: ALSO WHAT DID HE BUY DAMN THAT BAG IS HUGE
↳ priv.ynn: IDK I RLLY WANT TO KNOW
lalalakoala: you guys are so cute together it makes me want to die 🥱
lovenami: DAMNN GIRLY UR SO LUCKY (liked by priv.ynn)
Tumblr media Tumblr media
♡ liked by p1rateking_luffy, _ynln and 8.2k others
saaa_bo: public service announcement: my gf is the best. i love her sm. she is so beautiful, i am so lucky to be hers <3
tagged: _ynln
p1rateking_luffy: HEHE my future sister in law is so pretty (liked by ace, p1rateking_luffy)
↳ _ynln: AWWW LUFFY YOU'RE SO SWEET LOVE U 💕💕
_ynln: SABO STOP
_ynln: YOURE MAKING ME FALL IN LOVE WITH YOU ALL OVER AGAIN YOU IDIOT 🤓💖
↳ saaaa_bo: does this mean i won the boyfriend application?
↳ _ynln: there was no competition 💪
nicorobin: pretty girl
↳ saaaa_bo: i agree ☝️
↳ _ynln: YOU GUYS STOP IT IUBWVCEI
lalalakoala: think u feel lonely? spend the night third wheeling these guys and see how u feel then 💀💀
↳ _ynln: KOALA WE TRIED SETTING YOU UP W SO MANY PEOPLE YOU'RE JUST PICKY
↳ lalalakoala: 🥱🥱
Tumblr media
♡ liked by saaaa_bo, ace and 8.5k others
_ynln: top scoring appplicant 1️⃣
tagged: saaaa_bo
saaaa_bo: pretty woman
saaaa_bo: hell yeah 💪🔥🔥
ace: yn check ur dms i sent u uggo photos of sabo as a kid
↳ _ynln: LMFAOOO???
↳ saaaa_bo: ACE YOU'RE LITERALLY PRAYING ON MY DOWNFALL
↳ saaaa_bo: ALSO I WAS NEVER AN UGLY KID
↳ ace: sorry couldn't hear that over that tooth gap of urs 🥱
↳ p1rateking_luffy: HAHAHAHA YOU'RE SO FUNNY ACE
↳ saaaa_bo: 😐
↳ _ynln: HAHAHA NOOOO SABO WAS SO CUTE ‼️
↳ ace: everyone she's being held at gunpoint (liked by _ynln)
↳ saaaa_bo: 😐😐
blackleg.sanji: NOOOOOO
blackleg.sanji: gotta respect sabo for treating you well gorgeous queen (liked by saaaa_bo)
lalalakoala: omg im literally gonna have to block u
2K notes · View notes
cheezbites · 8 months
Text
Dating Ghost
✎: I wrote this very late at night (4:38 am) or very early in the morning - when I was motivated by the sheer amount of notifications from my inbox, ty all sm for the love and support💕!!
♡Summary: Head cannons of dating Ghost <3
**•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚  ˚*•̩̩͙✩•̩̩͙*˚*
Bf!Ghost has always been a black tea person, either he drank it alongside his breakfast or to calm him down on a rainy day. You were a coffee girl, you would go all out making them - milk, hazelnut syrups, whipped creams… You name it. And from this, another one of your childish inside jokes was born. You were conveniently in the kitchen at the same time as him, making your morning beverages.
“Hm,” you silently thought to yourself, contemplating if your idea was rational enough to act through with.
“Hmmmmm,” he jokingly imitated you, wondering what was on your mind.
You got a separate cup and mixed some of his tea with your coffee. You took the first sip and scorned your face at the unfamiliar yet vaguely distinguishable taste.
Soon he followed, not seeming to be too fond of it at first yet still drinking every last bit.
“Not too bad,” he silently muttered.
And every time you guys were in the kitchen making your daily beverages, the ‘CoTea’ (Coffee and Tea) inside joke was repeatedly brought up.
Bf!Ghost heard a sudden shriek from your bedroom, causing his heart to sink. His thoughts raced faster than the speed of how fast he was approaching your room, desperate to know what it was. What if it was an invader? He wouldn’t be able to live knowing that he wasn’t fast enough to save you from a serious threat, he’d hate himself and feel guilty every single day.
His breathing pattern returned to normal as he sighed in relief when he realised that it was just a spider on your bedroom wall.
“Shit,”
“It’s going to kill me!” You sputtered inattentively as you backed away as far as possible from the ‘murderous pest.’
He stacked a mount of tissues in his hand and effortlessly scooped it up, crushed it into remains of spider limbs and a brown fluid before tossing it in the bin. Shooting you a look that you swore said: ‘Seriously? All that commotion over that?”
“My saviour,” you quipped as you ran up to him and braced him in a tight hug.
Bf!Ghost was used to receiving the “Your eyelashes are so long!” ‘compliment’ from people, mainly from you. It always confused him as to why you pointed it out - maybe it was just a ‘girl thing’ he didn’t understand.
Bf!Ghost was sleep-deprived, sick and unwillingly glued to his bed after days of working, so you took care of him. (At night, when he was complaining about being too cold, you snuggled up next to him and fell asleep in his arms. Maybe he was faking it as an excuse to cuddle you, maybe…) You knew he had an energy drink addiction and some bad eating habits. Since quality meals require time, you poured that time into cooking for him. His gratitude toward you was beyond words, appreciating the care and effort you put into taking care of him. Your cooking not only filled his stomach but also warmed his heart, making every bite a taste of your love.
Bf!Ghost worked out often; so did you. You enjoyed each other's company at the gym, immersing yourselves in the shared playlist and the post-workout rush. His concern for you couldn't be contained. During some weekly sessions, he taught you self-defence techniques, a thoughtful gesture for times he couldn't be by your side.
Bf!Ghost loved making you say ‘please’, even after the smallest of favours. You tried to open your water bottle, but the lid seemed super glued on, you tried repeatedly but your attempts were in vain. You asked him to help you, forgetting one thing:
“Want me to feed you the water as well?” He sarcastically quipped with a shit-eating grin.
“Oh come on babe,”
“And what’s the magic word?” He asked expectedly.
“Please,” you stretched out your ‘please’ jokingly for the sole purpose of teasing him.
He seamlessly removed the lid which astonished you before handing you your water bottle. After all that effort and failed attempts, he made it look so easy.
Bf!Ghost Loathed being away from you; and you felt the exact same way. When he needed to leave or when you were gone, he would try to do things that reminded him of you. When you were teaching him how to cook your signature meals in the kitchen, he was picking up rapidly, improving and learning - soon enough he surpassed you in culinary skills. He remade your recipes to remind himself of you when you weren’t there, and you ‘borrowed’ a few of his hoodies, which were pleasantly engulfed in his scent.
Bf!Ghost Noticed you fell asleep during the horror movie you watched, the last thing he wanted to do was startle you or wake you up. He turned off the TV before heading to your room and placing your favourite blanket over you. He kissed your cheek gently and muttered a silent, “I love you.” Before calling it a night.
Bf!Ghost left wholesome notes for you to discover around the house; the messages were cheesy in the cutest way possible. Either him making you food after a long day of work and leaving it for you in the fridge with a brief note next to it, or a corny compliment stuck on the bathroom mirror for only you to see. It would be something along the lines of:
“Start your day off with a smile love, like the one you never fail to give me♡” (And I feel like this dude would have very messy handwriting, but when writing these notes he tried his best).
Bf!Ghost made most of the decisions in the relationship, you were very indecisive. This is probably the only thing he mildly dislikes about you - you were going through the trials and tribulations of a lifetime over picking between KFC and McDonald’s, you were persistent about what to order too, so he recommended stuff to you or sometimes ordered for you.
(I just know if you both got drinks, he specifically requested only one straw so you guys could share it).
Bf!Ghost was the “‘Scuse me, she asked for no pickles,” boyfriend, who would secure you a refund and a newly made burger, (mainly due to how intimating he gets at times).
You thoroughly enjoyed him looking out for you, though, knowing that he cared that much about you made your heart flutter only from thinking about it.
PART TWO IS OUT!!! <3
˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥—————————
König Version
Price Version
Gaz Version
Soap Version
˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥—————————
Masterlist
Tumblr media
830 notes · View notes
redbullgirly · 2 months
Note
hi i saw your requests are open!! i was wondering if you could write a lance x indian!famous!fem reader where shes an actress and shes always getting shipped with other indian actors and she decided to hard launch her and lances wedding. fc - janhvi kapoor
thank you 💗
THE WEDDING [LS18 smau]
Lance Stroll x indian!famous!reader
Masterlist
Summary: Y/N Y/L/N is a loved celebrity and her fans often speculate about her dating life, shipping her with other Indian actors and men. But what if, one day, she decides to hard launch her wedding with someone as unexpected as Formula One driver, Lance Stroll?
Warnings: I don't know many things about famous Indian actors, movies or series, and same goes for Indian culture. If you find any errors in this matter, please let me know! :)
Author's Note: Hi Anon, thank you for this request. I have to say it was probably the hardest social media au I have ever done, because I don't know basically anything about Indian movies, celebrities, actors and everything else... I found some random actors, but if some of you know them and I didn't portray them correctly, sorry about that! Though I hope you and everyone else will like it and enjoy it. Also thanks for the face claim, it helped me orient at least a little bit.
yourusername posted on instagram
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
liked by shahidkapoor, bellahadid, ishaankhatter, lance_stroll and 2,349,122 others
yourusername time for loveee 🤍🌻👡
view all 3,206 comments
user1 step on me. i beg
user2 Loveee💜🔥
shahidkapoor Always need time for love!💕😁
user3 i'm sensing something here 👀
user4 Wow okay Shahid... are you hinting something??
user5 always time for love you say😏
user6 PLEASE YOU AND Y/N WOULD BE THE PERFECT COUPLE
user7 Guys he's literally happily married. Calm down 🙄
user8 well he can dump her ass and marry y/n instead lol
user9 Y/N & Shahid nation STAND UP he commented😍😍
user10 So elegant so beautiful just looking like a wow 😳
user11 dream girl with dream life
user12 I don't like the Shahid and Y/N shippers in this comment section... c'mmon guys it's not gonna happen you can chill
user13 exactly if she's dating someone then it's obviously ishaankhatter 🤭
user14 giiiirl tagging him is WILD😭 but same tbh, I also think they'd be better couple🤷‍♀️
user15 naaaaah y/n and shahid 4ever
ranveersingh 💜🖤
user16 OMGGG
user17 he's here. I repeat: THE KING ARRIVED🗣🗣🗣
user18 ohhh I kinda see the potential of y/n and him being the IT couple😻
user7 Why the hell do you keep shipping this poor woman with older married dudes? Stop!
user19 jesus user7 let us live we do it just for fun🖕
user20 Idk about you guys but I don't do it just for fun... I live for this😂
user21 yeah same user20
user22 Can we talk about the fact he used the black heart he often uses in his captions plus the purple heart that Y/N just used in her caption?? Like hello? This has to mean something!!
user23 omg right? they're definitely hinting something🤨
user24 Hear me out, I'm Y/N's fan and ship her with multiple actors... but now you're being delusional, it's literally an emoji xd
user23 nah user22 convinced me there has to be something more to it🫡
user24 Perfect💯 wife material
harnaazsandhu_03 Need your makeup tutorial asap!✨🔥
user25 ME TOO PLS
user26 guysss what if she's trying to hint she was on a date or sm??!!!
user27 THAT'S WHAT I'M SAYING!!! Sry but the rose filled tub looks like it can fit two 🫢
user28 who do you think it is then?
user29 Pls Shadid Kapoor🫣
user30 I'm actually praying it's Ishaan rn🙏🙏🙏
user23 and i'm a new member of y/n and raveer singh nation... like imagine the matching outfits they'd slay together😩
user31 Unpopular opinion but I see Y/N with Varun dhawan
user33 yeah real unpopular 'cause he just announced he's engaged like two weeks ago girly 💀
user34 youu>>>>>>>>>
user35 Medical science has really reached another level with your plastic operations🥴
user36 stfu
dior 🤩💜
liked by the author
user37 help not liking dior comment being y/n's only interaction under this whole post
user38 Poor her she probably doesn't want to have even more dating rumors going around because of replying to someone's comment...😕
user39 lmao don't make her into some tortured soul, she's probably just too busy XD
user40 your photos are so aesthetic🥰
user41 I WANT HER TO FINALLY DATE SOMEONE SO BAAAD
twitter & messages between Y/N and Lance
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
yourusername posted on instagram
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
liked by dhramamovie, tigerjackieshroff, lance_stroll, ranveersingh and 5,207,155 others
tagged: vogueindia
yourusername thank you for this amazing photoshoot!🖤☀️
view all 5,908 comments
user1 Absolutely gorgeous 😍
user2 omg guys she used the black heart!!!
user3 No way, that literally has to be a sign🫢
user4 wait im so confused... what is happening?
user5 It's about Ranveer Singh using the black heart emoji in his captions pretty often, commenting it under her last post and now her having it in her own caption
user4 wtf? you ranveer girlies are CRAZY 😭
user5 stfu user4 they're meant to be together🥰🥰
priyankachopra Beautiful girl!❤️🙏
yourusername thx!!
user6 y/n finally replied to someone's comment🫣
user7 Noooo why is it Priyanka Chopra??! Reply to Shahid or someone you're dating😓
user8 guys let her live... this is exactly why she isn't replying to anyone
user9 TWO QUEENS INTERACTING 😻
user10 Absolute Stunner 🖤🖤🖤🖤
vogueindia Our pleasure collaborating with you!🫶
liked by the author
user11 even vogue is Y/N's fan😌
user12 Why are some f1 drivers in this woman's likes???🤨
user13 'cause she's famous lol
user14 Lance and others are always in Y/N's likes, I guess they know each other from some event or maybe they like Indian movies she's been in... idk, the world can be really small XD
user12 It's still kinda suspicious🧐
user13 naaah it really is not
user14 tasteful🌹
therajakumari Icon
user15 we love women supporting women
varundvn Didn't see you for a while and suddenly you're dressed in black... any more surprises coming? 🤔🖤🤍
user16 WHAT DO YOU KNOW VARUN
yourusername hmmm let me think 🤔
user17 I can't believe my eyes... did Y/N just reply to a man in her comments?😨
user18 OMGGGG
user19 no but what does it meeaaaannn?!
user20 This is a good day to be Varun and Y/N shipper🤭
user21 the emojis HELLO
user22 nothing will ever convince me they aren't secretly in love and dating 🥰
user23 Ehm... he literally has a fiancé?
user22 and what? maybe she's just a cover for him and y/n 😉
user24 I wanna be heeer
user25 I wanna be WITH her
voguemagazine 📸📸📸
liked by the author
user26 Bohot sundar 😍 [Very beautiful 😍]
messages between Y/N, Varun Dhawan, Shahid Kapoor, Ranveer Singh and Ishaan Khatter
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
yourusername posted on instagram stories
Tumblr media
seen by lance_stroll, ranveersingh, chloestroll, fernandoalo_oficial and 3,209,877 others
lance_stroll replied to your story: Can't wait to see my beautiful bride! ❤️
yourusername ohhh baby i'm so excited and nervous for tomorrow 😭🥰
lance_stroll Me too... but as long as we have each other, it's going to be okay
yourusername ofc lance 🫶
lance_stroll And if you change your mind about going public, just let know, okay sweetheart?
yourusername thank you, but i won't
yourusername it's time for the world to see my man 😘
lance_stroll ❤️
user1 replied to your story: y/nnnn what's happening
user2 replied to your story: I'm praying for you & Shahid rn 🙏
user3 replied to your story: Girlie isn't that the song you once said you want to play at your wedding???🫣
user4 replied to your story: So pretty
user5 replied to your story: 😍
varundvn replied to your story: Let's go! 🔥
yourusername are you srsly trying to hype up rn? 😭
varundvn ... Is it working?
yourusername ...maybe
varundvn Then let's go you're going to smash it in the wedding dress!🔥
yourusername u have no idea how much i'm glad crazy people ship us 'cause we got to meet thx to that 😭
user6 replied to your story: Bf reveal!!!!
user7 replied to your story: pls tell me you're finally going to announce you're dating one of your co-stars
user8 replied to your story: HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO FALL ASLEEP TODAY KNOWING TOMORROW IS HAPPENING SOMETHING BIG😩
yourusername and lance_stroll posted on instagram
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
liked by f1, shahidkapoor, charles_leclerc, kellypiquet and 20,344,109 others
yourusername Y/N & Lance Y/L/N Stroll 🤍💍
view all 34,029 comments
user1 I did NOT expect that
ranveersingh Congratulations to my favourite couple! Memorable day and beautiful ceremony.
liked by the author and lance_stroll
user2 my heart is breaking rn💔
user3 OMG RANVEER WAS THERE?!!
user4 i feel stupid for shipping him w y/n 😃
user5 But can we talk about how sweet it is he attended her wedding???🥺
user6 nooooo my favourite ship
user7 I guess at least they're close enough to go to each other's wedding 🫠
user8 this was definitely not on my 2024 bingo card
fernandoalo_oficial my first indian wedding but definitely not the last 🤪
lance_stroll Already planning on changing us for someone else?
fernandoalo_oficial no, but you can have like a golden wedding in twenty years 😄
yourusername you'll be definitely invited
user9 never in my life did i imagine fernando alonso and y/n y/l/n interacting with each other
user10 RIGHT? it still feels like a fever dream😭
user11 the wedding looks so beautiful!🥹🫶
shahidkapoor Forever & Always
liked by the author and lance_stroll
user12 that was supposed to be your wedding to Y/N dude
user13 MY FAVOURITE SHIP IS IN RUINS
user14 rip shahid and y/n girlies... 💔🥲
user15 Guys, let him be. He is married and so is Y/N now. It's actually sweet that he wishes them well.
user16 QUEEN😻
user17 who's here from f1 fandom ⬇️
user18 me and i can't believe lance stroll pulled some hot famous indian actress
user19 yeah, today has been crazy... 🤠
user20 I just saw one of her films and damn it's actually good xd
user21 how did we know NOTHING about lance being in a relationship???
user22 Idk I was just so shocked when I saw this post lol
user23 the twitter detectives got played this time😭
user24 No but why do I kinda understand why Y/N and Lance fit together perfectly-
user25 WE SEE THE VISION SIS
varundvn We can't send each other funny theories about our secret relationship anymore... 😓
liked by ishaankhatter, shahidkapoor and ranveersing
varundvn Anyway, congratulation so much! I bet I was the best bridesmaid you ever saw! 🫶
liked by the author and lance_stroll
user26 LOL not him being at the wedding as well 😃
user27 Why are all the men she was shipped with coming into these comments dropping hints about being besties and going to the wedding?!
user28 guys they were making fun of us the whole time🙃
user29 THEM SEDING EACH OTHER THEORIES HELP
f1 We hope to see Y/N in the paddock next season!🤩
user30 she will slay
user31 she will eat
user32 If we get Y/N in the paddock, maybe I can get over my favorite ships being turned into dust🫢
user33 I'M DEAD
isahernaez Dreamy wedding 🎀🤍
yourusername dreamy girl right here 😻
user34 i mean... congrats, but what the hell-?!!
user35 🥰🥳
user36 THIS IS MY ROMAN EMPIRE
THE END
Author's Note: Thank you for reading this social media au! I hope you liked it and I'll appreciate likes, comments, reblogs, follows and every other way of support. If you want to send requests for either social media au or normal written fanfiction, don't be shy. Have a great day!
321 notes · View notes
pray4byron · 2 months
Note
Hi! Could I request a one shot of Angel x gn reader? After Angel has a bad night with Val he comes back with makeup smeared on his face because of the tears and he feels all dirty and uncomfortable wearing his revealing clothes so his s/o takes care of him and draws a warm bath for him, takes his makeup off and brings him soft, warm and comfortable clothes then cuddles him and holds him until he feels safe enough to fall asleep <33 I love him sm
Tumblr media
once again, both of these asks were incredibly similar, so i’m doing both at once!!
i tried to keep this as neutral between platonic and romantic as possible, but it definitely leans a bit more on the platonic side
either way, i hope it’s still enjoyable for all💕
Warnings: Mentions of Abuse, Mentions of Valentino, Swearing, Extremely short :’)
Tumblr media
“Ticking Bomb”
Angel Dust x Reader
You sat in Angel’s hotel room playing with Fat Nuggets while waiting for him to get off of work, tonight was movie night! And honestly, you couldn’t be more excited, you and Angel had seen a preview for this new show, and you both were ready to binge the whole thing in one sitting.
Next thing you know, Angel bursts through the door, only to collapse against it, clutching himself closer, sobs echoing from his lips.
You knew exactly what happened, Valentino.
Immediately, you rush over to Angel, crouching down to his level. “Can I hold you?” You ask, your voice shaking, you feel awful that it does, cause this isn’t about you.
Angel’s head perks up, bold, black mascara - or eyeliner - you can’t tell, is dripping down his face, his wails bouncing off of the walls of the room, unable to control his voice enough to give you an answer, he was like a ticking bomb, waiting to explode.
“I need words.” You say softly, Angel wipes his face, before hiccuping a small, “Yes…”
You take him in your arms, cradling him, shushing his sobs as they slowly subside. “How about this? I’ll go start you up a bath, and then you can just let everything go, okay?”
Angel nodded, his body still shaking, “O-Okay…”
Quickly, you headed over to Angel’s bathroom that was attached to his hotel room, you scrambled through his pink bin of bath products before finding a nice bubbly, pink soap and a baby purple bath bomb.
You put both of them in, the water turned a nice lava pink, you lit a few candles, and turned off the lights, closing the door behind you, only leaving a crack open, “It’s ready for you, Ange, I’ll be waiting out here.” You said with a soft smile, as he entered the bathroom.
After about twenty minutes, Angel was done, you helped him take off any extra makeup that was left, as well as helping with additional skincare.
Now, you both lay in bed, Angel laying on top of you, for once his head was in your chest, and not the other way around.
You combed your hand through his hair, his snores falling off his lips, and eventually, yours did too…
169 notes · View notes
mxqdii · 2 months
Note
Hii i love your ADHD and bdp x matt headcanons sm I was wondering if you could do smth with anxiety reader? Like rly rly bad anxiety. I have extremely bad anxiety to the point where it has pulled me into depressive episodes and constant states of overthinking, needing reassurance 24/7 and always feeling alone/unwanted. I would rly rly appricate it sm if you did this it would mean so much to me as someone who struggles greatly. Maybe even mention like taking anxiety pills and stuff like that. (I was gonna do this annonymus but i decided not to incase you or anyone wants to talk💕 my dms are open)
headcannons - m.s x anxiety gf
Tumblr media
pairings: matt sturniolo x reader
summary: headcannons
warning(s): anxiety, mentions of medication.
not proofread
Tumblr media
first of all, matt would love any gf no matter what, we all also know that he also has his own mental health struggles
i feel like matt would definitely see some similarities in him and you (we all know he's an observer)
and since he observes you so much, he obviously notices the moments you get quiet, the way you cant stay focused, the way big crowds make you uneasy, he sees the signs.
he doesn’t really need to ask, cause he knows, and you know he knows
can easily read your body language, sees you shift in your seat? he knows you're uncomfortable, sees you picking your nails? he knows you're anxious
kind of likes the side of you when its just you and him , selfishly likes that he has you all to himself and that you feel this comfortable around him (and hopefully his brothers, eventually atleast)
when you have trouble sleeping, the night owl he is stays up anyways, playing with your hair until you fall asleep
always keeps rings on his fingers for you to fidget with instead of picking at your skin
if you get into a bad mental episode, he's by your side 24/7, helping however and whenever he can, whether thats driving you places or helping you shower, hes there no matter what.
(if you take meds) he'd watch you take them and be like "oh you take medication?" in the softest curious voice ever
that cues the overthinking and worrying that he'll see you different, but he's already reassuring you before you can get too far into it
reminds you to take your meds if you forget
sets alarms on his phone to remind you and him
a/n: so sorry this took so long!! hope you enjoyed :)
TAGLIST:
@opheliaofficial07 @stargirlv0id @strniolo @annaisabookworm @theperson-nextdoor @its-jennarose @thetriplets3 @gottamakemyhatersmad @luvsturniolo
371 notes · View notes
gtgbabie0 · 9 months
Note
hiii, so i have a request, i keep thinking about how hard it was for spencer reid in high school and growing up cause he didn’t have any friends and the only person he could rely on was his mom who wasn’t very stable😭so i wanted a fic where the reader and spencer a best friends but he’s in love with her and it’s in the first seasons, and the reader just kind of brings up how brave he is and comforts him and he’s just overwhelmed because no one actually paid attention to that and confesses to her and they kiss and stuff<33 btw i love your work and how you write🫶🏻
Tumblr media
-Spencer Reid x Reader
{Friends to lovers with Spencer}
Sorry, this took forever my love! College has been keeping me very busy. This request made me so soft pls I love him sm!! I hope you enjoy lovelies! 💕
⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆ ⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆ ⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆ ⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆ ⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆
It is late into the night when Spencer calls you, the thought of staying home alone is far too daunting for him to handle tonight and without a single complaint, you pack a small bag together and drive to his apartment.
Spencer still, after all these years of friendship can’t believe you always come all the way over to his place just for him, without expecting anything in return. You can tell by the look that paints his face when he opens the door, just how he’s taken back he is as you offer him a warm smile.
“I’m sorry I- I just. I couldn’t do it” he tries to explain, as if he needs to justify his reason for calling you. He struggles to find the right words to perfectly describe how he’s feeling right now, the odd ache that captures his chest entirely, a feeling that seeps into his bones and leaves him unsettled.
He closes the door behind you, locking it, as you drop your bag on the wooden floor next to his shoes, “It’s okay Spence, honestly. I don’t mind you know that” You smile at him, a sweet sight that melts his heart.
You’ve always been so kind to him something that Spencer didn’t think was reserved for him, for whatever reason. He was used to it and as horrible as that sounds it’s the truth. He’s used to people's unkind opinions about him, how they always seem to nitpick at his insecurities. That was his life growing up, especially in school.
Then he met you, incredible, beautiful you who left him star-struck. Spencer wasn’t used to having someone like you in his life, someone who always seemed to put him first and cared about him with this unconditional affection, and it often led him to feel as if it were some kind of joke that he wasn’t in on.
However, he quickly learned that that was far from the truth. It was the first night he opened up about his mother and in return you gave him your shoulder to cry on without any kind of judgement, Spencer practically felt all his walls crumble and in their wake came a warmth he hadn’t felt in a very long time. It was safety, you made him feel safe.
You look over at him noticing the way his eyes glisten with tears and you can’t help the blocky feeling that wedges itself in the back of your throat, you open your arms out to him, an offer he wouldn’t ever turn down.
Spencer wraps his arms around you tightly as if you might disappear into thin air. He lets his head fall upon your shoulder, a deep sigh escaping him as your hands soothe against his back. You’ve always had a way of making him feel completely at peace, despite the seemingly permanent stress cloud that hangs above him recently.
“Do you wanna talk about it?” You whisper as he sniffles against you, his shoulders shake beneath your hold ever so slightly and it causes a sudden pain to seize your heart, the type that has your chest tightening.
He takes a moment to ponder your question, “Maybe later? I just- it’s been a long week” he mumbles against your shoulder and in return you whisper a small ‘okay’ and Spencer sighs with relief, forever thankful for your patience.
The pair of you soon find yourselves sitting on his loveseat, empty take-out boxes sitting on the coffee table as Spencer is completely engrossed with the way you colour in your colouring book, in all honesty, Spencer could study you for hours and never find himself bored.
“It looks really good” he comments with a hushed tone as he closes the book he was reading, although he hadn’t even finished the first sentence let alone the chapter, far too enchanted by how you add vitality to the once colourless page, bringing the drawing of the Dolphins to life.
You look up at him with a bright smile through very tired eyes, “Thank you, Spence. Dolphins really are beautiful creatures” you state and he hums in agreement as you continue to shade them with a darker blue, a small yawn escaping you.
A certain peace blankets over the pair of you and it’s as if nothing outside of his apartment matters. The clarity allows Spencer's mind to drift, thinking about what it would be like to be with you, to come home to you, sleep next to you. He wonders if you’ll stay even though the nights where he all does is toss and turn if you’ll keep the nightmares at bay. He loses himself in what life would be like with you, a recurring thought.
“Penny for your thoughts sir?” You giggle, noticing the way he seems so deep in thought.
He clears his throat, racking his brain for a fact about dolphins but it’s hard when he’s so focused on you, “Oh umm-” he frowns before finally, the words began to fall effortlessly from his lips.
“Did you know, Dolphins have more brain capacity than humans, Their brains weigh 1600 grams to our 1300 grams. Dolphin brains also have a complex neocortex, which is the part of the brain that allows you to be self-aware and solve problems.” He lists off as if it were as easy as breathing and to Spencer it is.
He watches with pride blooming through his chest as your eyebrows lift with shock, “I actually didn’t know that, I suppose they don’t have anything on your IQ of 187 though” You smile, putting away your colouring book as you rub at your sleepy eyes.
“That and I guess it has something to do with me being human” he chuckles, helping you put away all of your many felt tips.
Spencer looks over at the clock, guilt immediately seeping into his heart. It’s gone past twelve am and he knows you have work tomorrow, it was selfish of him to ruin your sleep schedule just because he had a bad day, and just like that, he finds himself deep within his own self-sabotage.
It’s almost annoying how quickly you pick up on it, “You are just human Spencer, I think you forget that sometimes” You smile kindly at him, reaching for his hand and his breath hitches slightly at the sudden warmth.
“I’m sorry for keeping you so long” he whispers, fiddling with the loose thread of his sweater, “You’ve got work tomorrow and I kept you here I just-” You don’t give him time to continue, knowing it’ll just end up with him talking poorly about himself.
“-Spencer, I can just call in sick but that’s not the point, I’m here because you needed me and I’ll be here for however long you want,” you tell him, squeezing his hand slightly as you brush your thumb over his knuckles.
He doesn’t know what to say or do, his mind rushes with so many words he wants to say, yet all of them seem to be stuck in a ball in the back of his throat.
“What- what if I- what if I need you forever?” He whispers, eyes not daring to glance at yours the fear of rejection still captures him even if he knows that you would go to the ends of the world for him.
“Then I’ll be here forever silly,” you tell him, inching closer to him.
Spencer thinks his heart might just burst out of his chest, years of emotions building up inside him and despite everything he’s seen and been through this might just be the scariest feeling he’s ever felt.
“What is it?” You whisper, and he looks at you with so much emotion in his eyes it’s hard for you to read.
“I’m scared” his voice quivers as he bites back the tears that cling to his eyes, rubbing them away before they have time to fall, “What if I can’t do this?”
It's the truth he's terrified of loving you for so many reasons, he could sit there for hours listing them off, but they all seem to boil down to the thought of losing you, his solace in the crazy world.
Your eyebrows thread together as you move closer to him, you don’t really know what he means.
“Spencer Reid, you are the bravest person I know. I mean you’ve been through so much Spence and despite that, you’re still so selfless” you tell him, wiping away his tears with your sleeve.
Spencer knows he loves you, he’s known for a very long time, and now sitting here with you as you pour your heart out his feelings only triple. You're so close he can sense your body heat radiating off of you, and with the sudden closeness comes that all too familiar sickly feeling that spreads through his chest.
“Whatever it is you’re scared to do, I’ll be here through it all”
You smile when he finally looks up at you, forehead resting against your own as both your hearts pick up in pace. The butterflies in his stomach are all too prominent because, goodness you're so close to him, and he can feel your gentle breath fanning along his cheek.
His nose brushes against yours as you press your lips to his own, his tears wetting your own face, completely overcome with emotions as he leans into you chasing after your warmth as he kisses you back, something that surprisingly comes so easy to him.
“I love you in ways that terrify me” he whispers against you as you brush his hair away from his eyes, “I’ve loved you for a very long time” he confesses with a shaky sigh.
“Spencer-” you can’t help but let out a breathy giggle, “I love you too” and it doesn’t take long for you to kiss him again, excitement snuffing out the doubt in his mind. You both smile against each other's lips, the kiss breaking as you do so.
His heart has never felt so full before, content as you rest against him. Just as it should be.
“Can I ask you something?” You wonder, sitting up slightly as he nods with a small ‘Anything’
“How long?” You chuckle when he blushes, his cheeks adorned with a deep red colour.
“Longer than I care to admit” he whispers clearing his throat.
“So- how long is that?” Ah yes, you and your persistence.
“Since we were seventeen” he whispers so quietly that you can barely even hear him, and if you weren’t sitting so close you don’t think you would have heard him.
“Seventeen?” You ask as he nods, solidifying his answer and, if he’s completely honest, he doesn’t want to know your answer but yet that doesn’t stop him from asking, ‘What about you?’
You feel your face heat up dropping your head to his shoulder as you mumble a quiet, ‘Fourteen’ Your answer confuses him as he tilts his head slightly to try and look at you.
“Fourteen? We didn’t even know ea-” he doesn’t get to finish his sentence as you run off into the bathroom excusing yourself as he holds back a chuckle.
He decides to let it go for now, you can’t exactly hide in the bathroom forever and he knows he’s got a long time to talk to you about it so for now he’ll bask in this prideful feeling, knowing he’s been the one to hold your heart for years and many more to come.
⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆ ⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆ ⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆ ⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆ ⋆⁺₊⋆ ☾⋆⁺₊⋆
828 notes · View notes