There's always people theorizing how the Batfamily hides Jason disappearance and reappearance, but I literally haven't seen anyone use the best explanation: Witness Protection.
Like this literally answers every question. The Death Certificate? They had to fake his death. The empty grave? Obviously it had to be believable. The time when Wayne Heir "Richie Wayne" refused to step foot in Gotham and talk to his father? He was pissed about Jason's (non) death. Brucie Wayne's very real depression after his death? Well he lost contact with his son and he was under immense stress from the government.
Like this literally answers every question I can come up with. Why has no one said he was in witness protection? And if people have done it, send me fics and prompts because I'm obsessed.
And the best part is, the Waynes are so stupidly rich that they could pull it off. Lex Luther could try and conduct his own investigation but somehow he can never find anything concrete. And if he gets too close either Babs hacks them or Tim just calls up Conner for a distraction.
One time Jason gets cornered and asked how he felt about returning to his life after being in Witness Protection. Unfortunately, him and Bruce weren't on the best terms to explain the whole story but he comes in clutch. He spins the tale about how heartbroken he was to see his brother, father and grandfather grieving and how honored he was when he learnt his new little brother idolized him. Tim got ahold of a copy of the interview and will never let Jason live it down.
The media doesn't ask Bruce questions about Jason's death because last time they did he broke down and a suddenly furious reporter chastised them and reminded them that while Jason may be alive Bruce still mourned his death. The picture of Bruce in tears at the interview is currently one of Jason's favourite lockscreens.
Same goes for Dick. Any questions of his brother's death results in (1) Richie Wayne ready to throw hands at any and everybody, (2) his wife (well one of them) Barbara Gordon threatening the reporters or (3) That same Metropolis reporter chastising the whole community again.
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he says i hate everyone except you and that is addictive and that is kind of romantic and beautiful because you're young and you're kind of a sarcastic asshole too and you don't like bad boys, per say, but you don't really like good ones either. and you like that you were the exception, it felt like winning.
except life is not a romance book, and he was kind of being honest. he doesn't learn to be nice to your friends. he only tolerates your family. you have to beg him to come with you to birthday parties, he complains the whole time. you want to go on a date but - people are often there, wherever you're going. he's just so angry. about everything, is the thing. in the romance book, doesn't he eventually soften? can't you teach him, through your own sense of whimsy and comfort?
at first - you know introverts often need smaller friend groups, and honestly, you're fine staying at home too. you like the small, tidy life you occupy. you're not going to punish him for his personality type.
except: he really does hate everyone but you. which means he doesn't get along with his therapist. which means he has no one to talk to except for you. which means you take care of him constantly, since he otherwise has no one. which means you sometimes have to apologize for him. which means he keeps you home from seeing your friends because he hates them. you're the single exception.
about a decade from this experience, you'll type into google: how to know if a relationship is codependent.
he wraps an arm around you. i hate everyone except you. these days, you're learning what he's actually confessing is i have very little practice being kind.
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Peach's definition of a surprise may be a little excessive, but she's got the spirit! 🤭💖
One thing I haven't often talked about but which makes this pairing absolutely delightful to me is how the sheer difference in their social status would manifest in the "small" attentions they show one another. Nothing would ever be deemed too grand or too extravagant for the Princess, especially in the early stages of her friendship with Mario, and learning to apply a moderate level of zeal to her endeavors when trying to express her affection would still be an ongoing process even much later! 😅
(Inspired by this ask sent to me by @zootopiathingz. :3)
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Is it just me but your SB Vanessa looks a lot like Samus Aran from Metroid???🤔
Yall heard of Michael Leon Kennedy
Now get ready for Vanny Samus Aran
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I’ve said it before, but I could never be a YouTuber. All my titles would sound like clickbait while being totally factually accurate.
“Omg I almost DIED!!! (Again.)”
“My hell house is trying to kill us. (Again)”
“Allergic to my own hormones????”
“1 hour of Holly Mop napping.”
“The hell house is trying to kill us. (Again x2)”
People would click on them expecting the most dramatic shit and it’s just me vibing.
Which means you know if I’d ever title a video “confession: I need to be honest with you” it’s going to be fucking insane. Am I fleeing the country? Did a hellmouth actually open under my house? Am I actually 13 ferrets in a trench coat? You’ll find out.
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