#chasing-dreams-in-paradise

[samantabrzozowska]

"You love me even when you don't want it!"

~ Sam

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#me #myself #my self photos #my selfie #my face #my art blog #lingerie girl #cute girl #sweet girl #skinny girl #big kid #magnus chase and #child of paradise #childhood dreams #spirituality of the eternal child of paradise #valentine's day #god loves you #my self love

[annaofaza]

For some reason, I've been thinking of Knives's "Take me back to the higher dimension!" with Waymond and Evelyn's "You feel it too? Something is off: Your clothes never well as well the next day; your hair never falls in quite the same way. Even your coffee tastes wrong. ... And you stay up every night, wondering to yourself—" "How can we get back?'" exchange in EEAAO.

Like... Knives is trying to create this paradise, this beautiful world where Plants don't have to suffer, and I think he still remembers the innocent days with Vash and Rem, back on Ship Five. Except all of that (to him) was a lie, an illusion, yet he wants to recreate that sense of peace for real—but he's wondering at the same time if it's even possible in the first place. If he can bring it back.

And then Knives creates this illusion with Vash, but he can't make it stick. But he remembers that euphoria of having his brother "back," that peace that's been eluding him, and he so desperately wants that to return. And from that point on, while he's mending, while Vash is Eriks, he'll be thinking, It's possible. It has to be. Just bring me back and I can make the rest happen.

#idk where I'm going but it's been spinning in my mind for a long time #trigun spoilers #my post #trigun stampede spoilers #and maybe his dream (he thinks) is an impossible illusion #just as what happened in the past was #and he's trying to avoid that realization and what he's doing to try to make that happen #but he needs to chase that high #because what's left after that? #and the song waymond references is very much a love song #and knives wants vash back #it's not even a maybe he was like A PARADISE FOR US #he wants vash in that world with him and back with him and he gets the idea that... vash just won't do it #trigun stampede

[mariclerc]

Dreams and adventures by the sea | Charles Leclerc

Hello, this is the first time I write here and I like the idea of making several stories! English is not my first language so there are some translation errors, if you see one, please let me know!

Synopsis: Where you and Charles are fully enjoying the summer break with your little girl and you discover a recurring dream that he has.

Warning: None, just a little Charles fluff and Charles!dad/family man. I hope you like it <3

Sunbeams dance on the turquoise water, palm trees sway gently in the breeze. Charles Leclerc, tanned and carefree, chases a giggling Mollie along the shore. Her tiny pink swimsuit with flamingos glistens in the sun's rays as she squeals with delight and her tiny footprints disappear into the sand as the two year old girl scampers.

"Catch me, Mollie-mouse! Catch Papa!" He said as he chased after Mollie, they were running in circles.

"Dada! Dada!" She shouted with joy in her voice.

Charles scoops her up, spinning her in the air, the sea shimmering behind them. She throws her arms around his neck, burying her face in his shoulder while she giggled.

"Careful, you two! Don't turn into sandcastles before lunchtime!" You called to them from under a beach umbrella as you smiled.

Charles grins, his eyes crinkling at the corners. "Just practicing our pit stops, amore. We have to be ready for next season."

He plops down beside you on the sand, Mollie wriggling between you like a happy starfish. You carefully brush sand off her damp hair, her tiny fingers clutching at your necklace.

"This is the life, isn't it? No deadlines, no cameras, just family and sunshine." You said with a bright smile on your face, it had been a long time since you two had been so relaxed with your favorite people in the whole world.

"Except maybe less sand in the sandwiches, hmm?" He said while nuzzling your neck.

He winks, then reaches for a mango smoothie. You roll your eyes, but the corners of your lips rise. He's never learned to apply sunscreen, and his olive skin is already freckled with a toasty glow, but he still looks cute, as always.

"You look like a tomato patch, Charles. Don't you ever learn?" You rolled your eyes playfully at him.

"Sun's my natural fuel, amore. Makes me look like a Ferrari on the track, don't you think?" He said while shrugging his shoulders.

Mollie reaches for your smoothie, her tiny hand leaving a sticky trail. You laugh, handing her a small sip of your smoothie.

"Just don't blame me when you're peeling like a banana tomorrow."

"Wouldn't trade this sunburn for anything, not even a podium finish." He said with a smile, probably the most sincere smile you've ever seen.

He pulls you close, your skin cool against his heat. Mollie snuggles between you, her eyelids heavy with the sun and the sea. You watch the waves roll in, the sound like a lullaby.

"This is the best kind of winning, isn't it? Just being here, with you, with her."

"The only trophy I need." He said as he placed a kiss on your forehead.

He rests his head on your shoulder, and you close your eyes, breathing in the salty air, the warmth of the sun, the tiny, rhythmic pulse of your daughter's heart against your chest. In this moment, the world shrinks to just this small patch of paradise, a bubble of love and laughter, and you wouldn't trade it for anything.

☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆

Back on the yacht, the sun dips lower, painting the sky in fiery hues of orange and pink. Mollie, tired from her beach adventures, yawns and snuggles into Charles' arms. He bounces her gently, singing a soft lullaby that sends shivers down your spine.

"She's out like a light. All that beach air must be exhausting." You smiled as you looked at them.

"Don't worry, amore. We'll have plenty of time for adventures tomorrow. Tonight, it's just you and me." He said in a low voice so as not to wake her.

He winks, his eyes glinting with a familiar spark. You laugh, your heart skipping a beat each time he winks at you.

"And don't think about asking me to help with sunscreen again. You're on your own, tomato boy." You said jokingly.

"Hey! I resemble that remark. Besides, your touch is like magic SPF, amore. Keeps my skin smooth and my engine purring." He pretended to be offended by your words, but then he giggled like a teenage boy.

He pulls you close, your lips meeting in a kiss as sweet as the mango smoothie. The fire crackles on the deck, its warm glow illuminating your faces. The ocean laps against the hull, a gentle rhythm that lulls you into a world of your own.

"I love this, Charles. Just being here, with you and Mollie, although she is asleep, on the open sea. It feels like we're the only two people in the world." Did you whisper delicately.

"We are, chérie. We definitely are." He kissed your forehead with such care.

He leans back, his gaze sweeping across the vast expanse of water. He usually has a vacant look when he is very lost in thought or when he is thinking about something quite deep.

"You know, sometimes I dream about what it would be like to leave all this behind. The racing, the pressure, the fame..." he let out a soft sigh "You know, spending my days with you two without worrying if you're okay while I'm on the other side of the world."

"And become a beach bum? I'm not sure Mollie would appreciate the sand in her toys." You raised an eyebrow as you spoke and giggled slightly.

"No, no, darling, something simpler, you know sweetie... Just a small house by the sea, maybe a little vineyard...a family to raise. I know we've talked about this before, but I'd like to experience that quiet life with you." He said chuckling.

You have had this conversation a couple of times, especially the time you got pregnant, at that time you were 23 and he was 24 and you both had no idea what to do, you were very afraid. He at that time proposed the idea of leaving his racing career behind and focusing purely on you and Mollie, you obviously told him no, since one of his dreams was always, apart from having a family of his own, was to be a racing driver and leave a mark on the sport. You, for your part, when you told your parents that you were expecting Charles's baby, it was perhaps the worst thing you would have said to them, They did not take the news kindly and even told you to abort the baby, but obviously, that was not in your plans, you also wanted a family with Charles, he was always the ideal person for you. Since that exchange of opinions between your parents and you, they never spoke to you again and you did the same and honestly, it was better that way for you and your family.

Now looking back, you didn't regret that decision, on the contrary, you were grateful that it was like that since you knew how judgmental your parents are and how much they criticized you for the slightest, Charles could also experience that the times he went to visit you at your parents' house, they were not very nice to him, it doesn't matter if you had been dating for a long time.

He looks at you, his eyes full of longing. You reach out, tracing the lines of his pretty sun-kissed face. He gives you a small smile, the cutest thing you've ever seen, of course... Aside from your little Mollie.

"We already have that, Charles. We have everything we need my baby."

"Everything except maybe a little more time. Maybe a little less asphalt and a little more sand." He said as he pulled you closer to him.

He kisses you again, this time a slow, burning kiss that speaks volumes of unspoken dreams and shared desires. In that moment, you see a glimpse of the man behind the racing helmet, the boy who yearns for simple things, for a life built on love and laughter. The boy you fell in love with since you were 18 and the one who ensures the safety of his girls.

"Maybe you're right, Charles. Maybe next season, we'll find a different kind of track to conquer. One that leads us back to this very spot, with the sun on our skin and the sea in our hearts." You smiled at him.

He looks at you, his eyes filled with a promise of forever. You know, deep down, that this is just the beginning. The open sea is not just a backdrop, it's a symbol of endless possibilities, a life waiting to be written, together as a family.

And as the stars begin to twinkle in the darkening sky, you raise your glass to the future, a future painted with the colors of love, laughter, and the endless horizon.

#charles leclerc imagine #charles leclerc fluff #charles leclerc #charles leclerc x reader #charles x reader #charles x mom #formula one x reader

[leclerced]

little slice of paradise | op81

summary: oscar and his girlfriend sneak away for some alone time during a family vacation

warnings: 18+ minors dni. this is 5k worth of smut

author’s note: hi babes hope u guys like this! i had fun writing it <3 masterlist

They were on day four of vacation with his family, day four without touching each other for fear of being caught. Oscar had been wanting to get his hands on her since she walked out in the little white bikini and matching sheer skirt tied around her hips. It got worse as the day went on and she rolled around on her towel to get the tan she had been longing for all year while traveling with him race to race. He had to force himself to stop thinking about crawling up her body and sliding her bottoms to the side when he saw her lying on her stomach with her ass on display, her bikini top untied to avoid tan lines across her back.

He lasted until she finally joined them in the water and immediately latched to his back with her arms and legs around him as she piggy backed off him. It would have been fine except she started whispering in his ear about how she accidentally fell asleep and was dreaming about him fucking her right there only to wake up disappointed to find it was just a dream. He sat in silence for a few minutes after she said that, trying not to be obvious they were running away for alone time before saying that he was tired and possibly getting sunburned so he wanted to go in. His family all complained and begged him to stay, but he was already moving towards the shore with his girlfriend on his back. She slid off his back after a moment and challenged him to a race as she swam past him. He let her win so he could enjoy the sight of her jogging through the hot sand in front of them to grab her things and run to the beach house he’d rented.

Oscar’s eyes were already glued to her body, but he felt something shift in him as her sunglasses fell and she bent over to grab them. She had to rearrange her grip on the things she was holding to pick them up so he was able to catch up to her while she was bent over and teasingly pressed himself against her ass. She immediately shot up and he wrapped his free hand around her waist and pressed it flat against her stomach, pulling her against him. “Tonight, I’m going to fuck you just like your dream while you tell me all about it, angel.” He felt her stomach clench under his fingers before he pulled his hand back and slapped her her thigh as he took off running. He looked back to see chase him but instead, saw her standing flushed, staring at him with her sunglasses still in the sand and he laughed at the sight as he ran up the trail to the house.

Oscar layed on the bed catching his breath while he waited for his girlfriend. It wasn’t long before she trailed in and dropped everything in the doorway of their bedroom before shutting and locking the door. She immediately climbed on top of him, straddling his hips as she leaned down and kissed his chest. “You taste good,” she hummed as she flicked her tongue across his nipple before biting it. His hands moved to her hips as he rolled her against him and he replied, “I bet you taste better.” She pressed herself against him at his words, and his grip tightened on her hips as he rolled them over so he was on top before pulled away from her and made his way to the shower.

She followed him to the bathroom and he turned on the shower before pushing her in and dropping to his knees in front of her. she didn’t even have time to deny him as he untied the bows on her hips and her bikini bottoms fell to she shower floor with a wet smack. His hands desperately grasped her skin, one holding her steady on her hip as the other drifted down under her knee and lifted it to his shoulder. Her head tilted back against the tile as he teasingly kissed her thigh, barely brushing his lips against her skin.

Oscar wanted to leave marks more than anything, wanted to cover her skin in hickeys and bruises and bite marks, but this wasn’t a private vacation. His entire family was on the beach and would likely be coming up to get dinner started soon and they didn’t have long. She had to be quiet, but as soon as his mouth found her center and his tongue licked up her slit, she found herself moaning his name and curling her fingers in his wet hair. He slapped the thigh on his shoulder as he nipped at her clit warningly and her breath hitched in her throat as she whimpered and bit her bottom lip to muffle herself as he kitten licked at the bundle of nerves.

He loved having her like this, having his mouth on her as his tongue lapped at her folds. He switched between sucking on her clit and poking at her entrance with his tongue and the combination had her head spinning as she tried to hold her moans back.

She was starting to whine quietly as she rocked her hips against his mouth and he suddenly pulled his left hand from her hip and slipped it between her legs, immediately curling two fingers inside of her. Oscar could feel her clench around his fingers as she tried not to make any noise and failed, moans slipping through her bitten lips. Oscar couldn’t get enough of her as he looked up at her through wet lashes and watched her curl her hands in his hair and tug as she came on his tongue, whimpering his name. He pulled his fingers from her entrance and blindly reached up to push the two fingers into her mouth, gripping at her jaw roughly as her wrist found his hand and guided it to her lips as she moaned around his digits as her orgasm hit her. He could feel the vibrations in his fingers as he fucked them in and out of her mouth, muffling the noise she was making as he worked her through her orgasm. She lightly bit his fingers when his tongue on her clit became painful and he pulled his mouth away.

Oscar gently lowered her leg to the floor and smiled up at her as she whined around his fingers and her hips stuttered towards him, unsure it she wanted more or less of his mouth on her over sensitive cunt.

Her eyes fluttered open as she sighed around his fingers and flicked her tongue across the pad of his fingers before playfully nipping at them as he stood up. Her eyes followed him from waist level to where he towered above her, and she automatically reached out to pull him closer by the waistband of his board shorts. His body didn’t move and she whined, slipping a hand into his shorts to wrap around his hard cock. He sighed at the feeling, eyes shifting from his fingers fucking in and out of her mouth to where her hand had disappeared and was stroking his cock and the combination was making him dizzy. He was going to cum way too fast like this.

Oscar licked his lips as he pulled his fingers from her mouth to kiss her and she melted into him, arching her body so her nipples pressed against his chest. His fingers that were just in her mouth reached down to pinch her nipple teasingly as he pulled her hand out of his shorts. As soon as she broke the kiss and opened her mouth to protest, he pressed his fingers into her mouth again. “Go ahead and shower doll, I’ll take care of it.” She tried to protest by pushing her hand towards him, but his other hand gripped her wrist and he guided her into the stream of hot water. “Going to watch you like I have been all day.” She flushed at his words as his fingers pulled from her mouth and he grabbed the loofa, soaping it up with her lavender body wash before passing it to her. She turned to face the shower head to wet her body before she began washing. As she turned under the hot stream, she was greeted with the sight of Oscar’s soaked shorts falling to the ground with a wet smack. He had leaned back against the shower wall and was lazily stroking himself as he watched her. The sigh of him with his hand around his cock as he watched her sent a shiver up her spine.

They had never done anything like this before, she had never seen that look in his eyes. Her back had been to him for just a moment, and his eyes were locked on her perfect ass, but as soon as she turned his focus shifted to her breasts as she sudsed them up teasingly. His eyes flitted up to hers momentarily and his cheeks flushed before he looked back down at her body just as she pinched her nipple between her fingers and squeezed her breast with her spare hand and he felt his cock twitch as precum dribbled out. She continued teasing him, turned around and bent over to wash her legs as his breath hitched. His eyes were locked on her swollen pussy, and he would have taken the single step forwards to press himself into her if wasn’t terrified of his family coming up to the house as he was losing himself in her. He knew he could keep one of them quiet at a time, but not both. They had tried and been caught at his job too many times to count and Oscar felt it was one thing to have your teammate and best friend walk in on you in a compromising position, but he wouldn’t be able to live it down if they were caught by his family. Even if it was just overhearing moans. He’d have to fake his death and move onto a private island with his girlfriend and have someone row a boat out with supplies monthly to escape the embarrassment.

Oscar was disappointed as she stood back up and turned to him, “Oz, would you wash my back for me?” Her voice was soft as she said that nickname, the one she only used when she wanted something him, and held out the hand with the loofa, he couldn’t say anything as he took the loofa in his spare hand. She turned back around and his eyes glazed over her body as she ran her fingers through her hair before lifting it from her back. He was gentle as he pressed it into her shoulder and began rubbing circles into her skin, gulping as he watched the suds run down her back and over her plump ass. He could feel his balls getting heavy as he grew closer, pumping himself faster as he washed her back. She knew what she was doing, asking him to wash her back. He was slow and methodical, or just focused on her ass and jerking off onto it, and she was completely relaxed as she stood with her chest facing the shower, her arms draped above her head to hold her wet hair up. Oscar’s mind was reeling at her pose as she arched her back and tilted her hips towards him teasingly and the head of his cock brushed against her ass. He had half the mind to fuck her right there, but he thought he heard a door downstairs and knew it was only a matter of time before his family was calling them down for dinner. He pushed her forward and turned her around in the same motion as he dropped the loofa and pressed his lips to hers, his now free hand wrapping around her throat loosely to hold her against she shower wall. She whimpered into his mouth and brought one of her hands down to take over for his between them and she finished him off in a few strokes as he buried his face in her neck and came on her stomach. She giggled as he panted against her, free hand stroking his back lovingly as she rubbed her thumb over the aching tip of his cock.

Oscar batted her hand away as he pulled her in for another kiss and stepped back into the shower spray to rinse them both off. As she turned away from the kiss and bent over to pick up the loofa, Oscar promised himself he’d find a way to fuck her tonight without having a chance of being caught.

Two hours later, Oscar was making up an excuse to run to the store without anyone else. His girlfriend immediately tried to tag along, but he told her he was trying to be romantic and asked her to stay behind so she did, confused and nervous to be alone with his family for the first time. She thought it would be a quick trip, but the 15 minute trip turned into an hour and she was starting to worry as they started their fourth round of cards. Just as she reached to text him, the door opened and he came in carrying a bag of socks and underwear, "Got what I needed, forgot to pack enough." She knew he was lying, she had packed for him and she always packed twice as much as necessary no matter what, even when she tried to size down so he definitely had enough. She wanted to follow him up to his room and quiz him, but it was her turn and his sisters were snapping their fingers hastily at her to go. Oscar returned awhile later and joined her, gesturing her to stand up from her chair before he pulled her down in his lap and rested his chin on her shoulder. He waited until the game finished before he asked, “Do you wanna go on a night walk with me? We can look for crabs!"

Before she could reply, his sisters shouted yes and started sliding their shoes on and he immediately regretted asking in front of them. His mother intervened before he could. She grabbed the younger girl by the arm and said, "Let the love birds go on a romantic walk, they deserve some alone time." Oscar blushed and his sisters eww'ed in unison as they kicked their sandals off and sat back down. His dad dealt out another hand but skipped them as Oscar nudged her off his lap and led her out the door. The house was on stilts in case of hurricanes or flooding, so the door to the house was on the second floor and they had to walk down stairs until the were completely out of view of his family, and he immediately backed her against a wall and kissed her like he’d been wanting to all day. She whimpered into his mouth as her hands found their way into his hair and she tugged beautifully, earning a sigh from him as he tilted his head back at her tug.

She moved her lips to his neck and licked up the column of his throat before she nipped at his adam’s apple and pulled away. “Why did you go to the store earlier?”

He laughed and leaned down to kiss her softly before he said, “Got you a surprise. I’m ‘bout to show you. Don’t bother asking any questions because I won’t answer, just be patient like you have been.”

They walked probably half a mile before they stopped in a completely secluded area of the beach, a few hundred feet from any of the houses. In the moonlight, there was a lone tent on the beach, and she was annoyed they had come across a camper or two and would have to turn back to avoid interruptions while she got her surprise. Then, Oscar pulled her towards the tent and started opening it and she realized this was her surprise as she saw the air mattress inside. She couldn’t help the giggle that left her as he crawled inside and sat on the mattress, patting the spot next to him proudly. “So this is what you were doing for an hour. Not buying socks and underwear.”

He laughed, “I think I’m pretty clever.” She nodded but before she could agree, his smile fell as he pushed her back and climbed on top of her as he licked his lips and said, “Now, I can fuck you without having to worry about anyone hearing.” Her breath hitched in her throat and his lips were on her neck before she could reply as she was whimpered in response. Her legs wrapped around him to pull him down into her and his hips rocked into hers as soon as the touched. She gasped at the contact, then felt dizzy as his hands wormed their way under her cotton shorts to palm at her ass as he rolled his hips into hers, his cock pressing against her cunt and making it throb.

She’d been wanting, needing, him for days. She hadn’t felt him inside her since they had a quickie before their flight and she couldn’t make it another three days until the vacation ended. His hands didn’t stay on her ass for long, Oscar was just about to pull her bottoms down when he felt the ocean breeze hit his skin and he realized he left the tent open. He pulled away and zipped it closed before he sighed dramatically and turned around to see she’d crawled to the center of the mattress and was lying against the stack of cheap pillows he’d gotten with her legs open for him. He fit himself into the space and pressed his lips to hers hungrily. She sank down the pillows and into the mattress and tangled her hands in his hair to pull him with her. He went back to his previous mission to remove her bottoms and this time he’s successful in removing her pajama shorts and lacy bottoms. Her top and bra are next and then he’s kissing his way down her body and nipping at her skin, wishing he could leave hickeys up and down the soft sun kissed skin.

Oscar goes from her stomach to her left hip, then thigh, before he wraps his arms around her thighs and settles his gaze on her cunt. She can’t help but blush above him as she watches him look at her and lick his lips, then look up and meet her eyes as he softly blows on her pussy. She shudders at the teasing, eyes fluttering shut as she whines and he smirks coyly before licking a flat stripe up her slit and wrapping his lips around her clit. A surprised moan is punched out of her as her legs tighten around his head and she gasps, “Oz, baby, feels so good.”

He moans against her as he unwinds his right arm from her thigh and brings it between her thighs to press two fingers inside of her. She’s so wet they slip inside easily and he can feel her cunt twitching around his fingers as she adjusts to the intrusion. Oscar gives her a moment before he begins thrusting and curling his fingers into her. She rocks her hips in tandem with his fingers and mouth and it’s not long before she’s moaning his name as her orgasm washes over her. Oscar pulls his mouth from her pussy when her thighs relax around his head and he rests his head on her right thigh as he pants against her. She tugs on his hair and he lets her guide him up her body, but just as he dips down to kiss her she’s pulling his shirt up his body.

Oscar sits back on his heels and pulls it off over his shoulders and drops it next to them then dips down again, pressing his palms into the mattress on either side of her head.

Her hands find his waist and begin to explore his skin as he skins his weight onto her, hovering his lips above hers as he whispers, “Tell me what you dreamed about, baby.”

She whimpers against his lips, “Dreamed we were on a beach alone… could fuck anytime we wanted. Think we had a whole island to ourselves.”

Oscar can’t help but grin, “Our own little slice of paradise?”

She nods dreamily against him, their lips barely brushing as she continues, “Almost came in my sleep I wanted you so bad baby,” He moans and presses his lips to hers before she can continue, his tongue pressing into her mouth as she’s calling him baby and she eagerly kisses back. The hands that were exploring his chest and back suddenly move down to press his shorts down his ass and he uses one hand to help pull them all the way down, the other stays by her head to support his weight above her. He’s moaning into her mouth again as one of her hands finds his cock and begins jerking it and he’s confused by how slick it is because he didn’t get lube and then his stomach twists as he pulls away, “Did you- you got your hand wet with-“ He doesn’t even finish before she’s nodding and he doesn’t know why he’s so turned on by the thought of her touching herself to get her hand wet to jerk him off was so hot but it was just.. erotic. Oscar pushes himself up and sighs as he replaces her hand with his and presses his cock against her. His are locked on her pussy as he rubs the head along her slit, but the gasp she lets out when he pushes the head inside makes him shift his gaze up to see her eyes flutter shut. “What almost made you cum in your dream?”

Oscar teases her entrance with just his head as he waits for an answer, pressing his free hand against the flat of her stomach to hold her still when she tilts her hips to ease him inside her. With a huff, she says, “You- I was lying like I was today, and you came up and fucked me like that. Woke up and was disappointed to find you weren’t there.”

Oscar wants more details, but he’s too impatient to keep up the teasing when he hasn’t been inside her for four days. He pulls away from her and before she complains his hands are on her hips as he flips her over, “Like this, yeah?” His hands move to her ass and he pulls her cheeks apart and groans, “Fuck, you’re fucking soaked, baby.”

She grabs a pillow and pulls it to press her cheek into as she arched her back into his touch, “Just like that, Ozzie.” Oscar’s cock twitches like that aw she slurs the petname and he guides his hands down her thighs so he can slip between them, then grabs the pillow under her head and pulls it away.

“Hey, I was using that!” She whines, but he ignores her and lifts her hips with his other hand, fingers digging into her skin as her shoves the pillow under her hips. “Oh.”

Oscar grins behind her, then tuts as she reaches for another pillow. “I wanna hear you princess, told you why we came out here didn’t we? Don’t want you pressing your face into the pillow.” She pouts as she presses her cheek into the mattress, the smooth velvet surface smooth against her skin. His words turn her on so much she can feel it drip out of her and blushes at the thought that he might be staring right at her cunt when it happens, and the thought is confirmed as his fingers swipe over her entrance and collect it. “So wet for me, you’re making a mess.”

She whimpers and her eyes flutter shut in pleasure as his fingers press to her clit, “Please, Oz.” His fingers on her ass rub against the skin softly before abandoning her to wrap around his cock and guide it back to her entrance. No teasing this time, he presses all the way inside her and they moan in unison. Oscar can’t breathe with how good she feels fluttering around him, arching her back to press him impossibly deeper. Then he’s fucking her quickly, his hand back on her ass and her cheek is rubbing against the velvet and it’s not so soft anymore as her face scrapes against it. She doesn’t bother trying to muffle any sounds like Oscar requested, lets her eyes flutter shut as she gasps and moans. Her hands grasp for purchase and find a pillow above her. She just wanted something to hold onto, but Oscar tuts again and grabs her arms, pulling them behind her and holding them there.

Her body twitches underneath him as he presses his fingers against her clit, “Told you I didn’t want you to muffle your moans.”

She whines, “I just wanted something to hold onto.”

He softens and relaxes his grip on her wrists and tangles his hand with one of hers, “Good?”

She nods and hums “Good. Perfect, baby. You’re so good, feels so good.” She doesn’t even know what she’s saying anymore, her mind has gone hazy and she’d agree to anything he said this far gone.

He can’t help but grin and lean down to press a kiss to her shoulder. He can feel how close she is as she clenches around him, “You wanna cum for me?” She nods into the mattress and whimpers please eagerly in agreement. “Cum around my cock then.”

Her entire body goes taught under him before she shuddered and came around him with a drawn out moan, her hips rocking back into his as her grip on his hand tightens. He pulls his fingers from her clit and starts to pull out to jerk himself off but she whines, “Want you to cum in me.”

His stomach clenches as he sinks back into her, “Yeah? Fucking filthy. Wanna walk all the way back home full of my cum, talk to my family with my cum in your cunt.” She gasps at his words, “I- Shut up. Don’t ruin it.”

He laughs, “My pretty little slut, I’ll give you what you want. I’ll give you anything you want, just say the word.” Her heart stutters in her chest and her pussy flutters as he picks his pace back up, hands planted firmly on her ass and she gets lost in the feeling of his cock in her and how pretty his moans are. She’s not expecting it when his fingers find her clit again as he groans, “Wanna feel you cum around me. Want me to fill you up then cum around me one more time, just give me one more.”

Her breath hitches in her throat and she can’t fight the knot building in her stomach as she nods and whimpers. His fingers speed up on her slick clit, rubbing sloppy figure eights into the bundle of nerves as his hips stutter and he moans her name. All it takes is the twitch of his cock in her and she’s cumming again, writhing underneath him as he fucks them through their orgasms. He finally stops when she pulls her hand from his and he drops his body down onto hers, circling his arms around her waist as he presses a kiss into her shoulder. “‘M gonna rent us a private island one day, make your dream come true. Not a bad idea.”

She can’t help but giggle, “Might have to marry you if you quite literally make my dreams come true.”

He nips at her shoulder, “Don’t tease me… We’re racing in Vegas now, might get you drunk enough to get hitched.” She doesn’t say it, but if he asked right then she would fly to Vegas and get married completely sober. He rolls off of her a moment later, and she whines as he leaves her body and then pats her butt cheek lovingly. She immediately regrets asking him to cum in her when she feels it start to drip out, but then remembers where they are and quickly rolls over and unzips the tent. Oscar gives her a questioning look as she takes off for the ocean giggling. He realizes what she’s doing after a second and takes off after her. His strides are longer so he catches up to her once she’s waist deep in the water and he wraps his arms around her, nearly tackling her into the water.

She squeals in his arms and tries to slip down and out of his grasp but he tightens his arms around her. His voice is teasing as he says, “I was gonna clean you up, but whatever. This works too.”

She turns in his arms, “They’ll understand if we say we went night swimming and drifted too far and had to walk back, and we hopefully won’t reek of sex.”

He nods his head, “Still could have let me get another taste.” He dips down for a kiss and she rolls her eyes as she appeases him, tilting her head back and letting her eyes flutter shut as he dips down to grip her thighs and lift her around his waist as he walks a bit further out. He lets the lazy waves crash over them as they make out for a few minutes before he begins walking back to shore and back to the tent. He’d bought towels for clean up, but they work for drying off so they can redress and go back to the house.

Surprisingly, all the lights are off when they return and when she retrieves her phone from the game table, she checks the time and realizes they were gone for three hours. They sneak off to bed without making any noise and hope that no one noticed how long they were gone, or at least that no one would mention it the next morning or the following night when they snuck out to the same tent after dark to get some action.

#oscar piastri smut #op81 #op81 smut #oscar piastri imagine #oscar piastri #formula one smut #formula one fanfic #formula one #my writing #f1 smut

[silverstonesainz]

august

─── august slipped away into a moment in time... 'cause it was never mine

daniel ricciardo x fem!reader warnings; just sad. 17.8 k words

Everything with Daniel came easy. It came naturally, beautifully, and all at once. It was a good thing.

You met him in August, under the scorching summer sun and bottomless margaritas. Between glasses of mango and lime, you bumped into him. He smiled, you smiled too, and the rest wrote itself. You were drunk– a little too drunk for three in the afternoon, but what was summer for? You stumbled on your feet,  toes slipping through the straps of your flimsy shoes as you staggered for your own balance. And in a failed attempt to keep yourself upright, you reached out for a chair but instead found your fingers gripping onto the white linen of his shirt. His hands were quick to find their place on your torso, like it was always meant to be there, like he’d done this a million times before. Daniel helped you find your balance, knees bent so that he’s at your eye level. His smile was sobering, knocking the air right out of your lungs. Thank you was caught in your throat, even if your lips were parted to give them way. But you were rendered speechless. 

“You alright?” He asked, the warmth of his hands seeping through the thin material of your sundress. 

“Y-yeah.” You finally managed, putting your weight back onto your feet. “I’m alright.” 

“Good. I’m Daniel, by the way.” 

He let you go, and you missed him. He held his hand out of you to shake, one you gladly take as you tell him your name. He repeated with a smile. You were the first to pull your hand from his. “Could I buy you a drink? As a thank you, for saving me?”

He obliged. And after another strawberry– or was it watermelon? You couldn’t distinguish the details by then. All you could remember is that Daniel sat at the bar with you and  laughed at jokes you’re sure made no sense. You have a vague memory of the party ending, of having to bid adieu even if you weren’t quite ready to say goodbye to your new friend. But that’s when your memory goes spotty and the next thing you know you’re waking up in yesterday’s clothes with a pounding in your head. The sun beckons a new day, your last day in Mykonos begs you to fight through your hangover to enjoy your last twenty-something hours in paradise. So you do. You rinsed all your mistakes under the cool water, flashes of honey brown eyes and a smile so wide it hurt your cheeks thinking about it. 

Two texts sat waiting for you when you stepped out of the shower. 

Unknown   9:19 AM Hey, it’s Daniel.  Care to join me for breakfast? 

You weren’t sure when you had given him your number, but you silently thanked your drunk-self for doing something sober-you could never muster the courage to do. By then, your friends had already gone on their final adventure, leaving you to recover in the hotel room. You had no plans for your last day, so you replied with a quick sure, and got ready. 

Daniel is already sitting at the table when you make it down. He’s seated at the far corner of the hotel restaurant, nursing a cup of coffee as he read something on his phone. The nerves rattled your chest with every step you take, hoping silently that he would look up at you so you wouldn’t have to awkwardly announce your presence. And he did, setting his cup and phone down the closer you got. Hey you he says softly, standing from his chair to greet you with a hug. 

He was warm, smelled of rain in the spring, of the happy earth after a downpour. He smelled like a backyard of freshly watered flowers, of home and comfort. You tried not to let yourself drown in it, but you know it would be something you’ll be chasing for the rest of your days. 

You sat across from him, allowing small talk of the weather to unravel into a two hour conversation. You talked about work, about your best friend’s bachelorette party– the reason you were in Mykonos in the first place. You told him about your hopes and dreams, the silly ones and the serious ones. And he spoke of the world, of the places he’s traveled, the people he’s met. He made life sound so exciting, He speaks of life so happily, you were almost envious of him. His eyes glistened with every word, every laugh, every ounce of hope you could ever wish for yourself. 

“So when do you leave?” Daniel asked, sipping on his water. 

You blew out a sigh, “Tomorrow morning.”

It was the first time you saw him frown. A deep frown that had his lips curved down and brows furrowed. That’s too soon he complained. It was. It was far too soon, but you didn’t have the heart to admit it outloud. So you nodded, a soft hum buzzing past your closed lips as you brought your hot tea up to your mouth. 

“Any plans for the rest of the day?” You shook your head. “Would you let me take up your time then?” 

You could feel your cheeks turn red, heat rising to the tips of your ears. Daniel smiled, eyes wide and bright like they knew what your answer was going to be. How could you deny him? 

Daniel didn’t have much of a plan, but it didn’t matter. You enjoyed his company, you enjoyed the laughter and the way he looked at you. You walked the streets, played tourist with him. You walked in and out of shops, convincing each other you needed this little knickknack and that tacky magnet. And by the end of it, you had handfuls of cheesy souvenirs to remember the day by. 

The last stop was the gift shop in the hotel lobby. You followed each other up and down the aisles of the little store, past overpriced snacks and toiletries. Sneaky glances and smiles after catching the other, you and Daniel play cat and mouse throughout the store till you part ways. You found yourself spinning the display of touristy jewelry. Leather straps, tarnishable chains, with beachy charms attached. Flowers, a turtle, even a single wave. You stole a glance at Daniel who looked up at the shirt selections, flipping through the sizes in search of his own. A bit of sadness settled in your chest as you came to realize that the end of your day– of your time– with Daniel was coming slow & torturous. You ached at the thought, biting on the inside of your cheek as you crouch down to get a better view of the adjustable bracelets. 

You met him at the register with an exchange of sad smiles. You paid for your stuff, he paid for his. And as you stepped out of the  gift shop, your heart lacked a heaviness you had been expecting. The sadness was there, but no dread. You stopped with a soft stomp, turning on your heel to look up at Daniel. He stared down at you with a certain kind of softness, the smile maybe a bit dampened by the incoming goodbyes that you were yet to exchange, but you had an inkling that it wouldn’t be the last time you were going to see him. 

“Thank you for today,” You said softly, “I had a lot of fun.” 

“Me too.” 

Silence. Shifty feet. An unwillingness to say farewell. 

You looked down at your small gift bag, pushing around the crumpled receipts to pull out a bracelet. It had black, adjustable straps, looped through dark blue beads. You held it out to him, “For you. Something to remember…” 

Remember what? You couldn’t say. But Daniel understood. He took it, ripped apart the plastic and slipped it on. He shook it on his wrist, smiling up at you like a kid who did something right. Then he was fishing his bags until he pulled out his own little gift to you. He held it out in his palm, a silver keychain with a photo of the windmills in the middle of it, uttering the same words you had moments before. Something to remember. You took it with a soft thank you, holding it tight in your fist. 

This was it, the impending goodbye, the inevitable end to it all. Neither of you wanted to say it, to end the chapter– close the book. 

“I’ll see you soon, yeah?” He asked hopefully, the grip on his bags suddenly tighter. 

You smiled. “I’ll visit you in Monaco.” 

“I’ll visit you in London.” 

“Okay.” 

“Okay.” 

One breath. Inhale. Exhale. 

You threw your arms around him, savored the way his own found solace around your middle. You tried to memorize the way it felt to be in his arms, the smell of the fresh rain– the feeling of home. You’d known the man for twenty-four hours and yet, all this came easy. Melting into him, picturing the rain, promises of flying country to country, it all came so easy. 

His hands rubbed your sides as you pulled away from him. Safe travels, doll. 

You too Danny. 

Maybe walking away wasn’t the easiest thing, to turn your back on him while silently wishing he would stop you. You wished you lived in a movie where the guy impeded your travel plans. Because truth be told, if Daniel asked you to stay a little longer, you might’ve done it. But you made it to the elevator all by yourself, turned to catch a final glimpse of Daniel, who stood in the same place you left him. He lifted his hand, waved one more time before the doors shut. You huffed a sigh, tried to turn your focus to repacking your luggage. Your friends were all back in the room, pestering you on your whereabouts. But you smiled, shrugged your shoulders as you let the day behind you play in the back of your mind.

You finished packing most of your things by ten that evening, promptly falling asleep as the exhaustion from walking all day swallowed you whole. Your dreams were filled with fantasies of a boy with curly hair and honey brown eyes, and his warmth engulfing you. It was pleasant, comforting, homey.

And in the middle of all that good, your eyes sprung open. You had a sudden burst of energy, unable to fall back asleep even if your flight wasn’t for another five hours. You tossed and turned, trying to find a sweet spot that would allow you to slip back into a slumber. But to no avail, it’s three-thirty and there was no hope in falling asleep. You sighed, sitting up and reaching over to grab your phone off the nightstand. Your phone pinged. Once. Twice. Thrice.

Daniel   3:32 AM Are you awake? Please say you’re awake

You smiled, biting down on your bottom lip. 

You   3:33 AM I’m awake.

Daniel   3:33 AM Good. Meet in the lobby. PJs mandatory. 

You’re giddy, slipping out of bed as quickly and quietly as you can. You grabbed your room key and cellphone, slipped on your slippers, before taking the elevator. The doors slid open, revealing Daniel standing in the same place you left him. His smile was contagious, making your cheeks hurt as you took quick steps over to him. He held his hand out, palm facing up as he mocked a bow while whispering a soft m’lady.

You grinned, taking his hand and letting him whisk you away. You walked the length of the hotel beach, up and down, chasing your shadows given by the warm lamps that illuminate your path. Your toes dug into the wet sand, leaving an imprint of yourself with every step. You bumped shoulders with Daniel, exchanged sleepy smiles, all too happy to bask in the other’s company for a moment longer. Finally, Daniel pulled you down on the sand by him, higher up the property, but still close enough to the threat of the tide. The stars glimmered, twinkled down at you. 

“Why were you up?” You asked, turning to look at him. You traced the arch of his nose as he stared up at the sky, traced the curls that lay on his forehead. Daniel blew out a breath through puckered lips, shrugging. 

“Why were you?” 

The question rested in the air above them, leaving the other to assume the answer. Another comfortable silence, accompanied by the ocean coming and receding. Fingers unknowingly inch closer and closer, begging to be laced between each other. But they danced on the sand, pinkies brushing but never linking. 

It’s Daniel’s turn to look at you. His turn to trace the curve of your lips, the curl of your lashes, to commit you to memory. “I want to see you again.” 

You smiled, coughed a laugh. “I leave in a couple hours Daniel.” 

“Yeah I know. But… we could meet again.” 

You turned your head. You searched for the joke, for the punchline, the goofy smile followed by light-hearted laughter. But all Daniel did was smile. Lips touching, dimples deep. His eyes read with so much hope, it sent your heart into a frenzy. 

“We could.” 

He grinned. “We could.” 

You nodded, teeth digging into your bottom lip to hide the dopey smile that threatened to peek through. 

There weren’t many words exchanged for the remainder of the hour. You memorized the placement of the stars in the night sky, the sound of the tide rolling to and fro. You remembered the night exactly as it was: just you, Daniel, and the world quietly watching. 

The fifth hour rolled around, forcing you on your feet. Your hands found themselves in Daniel’s, giggling as you tried to pull him up onto his feet with you. You brushed away the sand, shook out your hair. You looked up at Daniel as he did the same, smiling over at him when he looked at you. The walk back to the lobby was slow, filled with small talk about the weather and travel plans. He rode the elevator up to your floor, walked you to your door, just as a gentleman does. He tucks your hair back, chuckles softly. 

“I’ll text you.” 

“And I’ll respond.” 

He smiled, taking a step backwards, “I’ll see you soon.”

Another step back, and another, and another until he’s at the end of the hall and waving at you. You stood at your door, watching him leave, waving back before he turned the corner and disappeared. You tapped your key against the door, unlocking it and shut it softly. With your back pressed against the hardwood, you exhaled softly. Head in your hands and a hole in your chest in the shape of Daniel. You felt crazy, maybe a little delirious. Another huff, another hopeful sigh as you pushed yourself off the door and got ready to fly home.

The morning flew past you. Between security lines and scrambling to buy some coffee, you barely had a moment to breathe. And when you finally did find the time, all you could think of was Daniel. Of his laughter, the smell of his cologne, the sweet promise to see each other soon. You slipped your phone out of your pocket, a bit disappointed at the lack of a text. But it was half-past seven in the morning, the man must’ve been asleep… right?

You boarded the plane, buckled yourself into your seat minutes before eight. Still not a single text from the Australian. Your fingers hovered above your keyboard, thumbs shaking as you searched for the words to say to him. 

You   7:56 AM Don’t forget about me.

And after four hours, when the plane touched down in Heathrow, you took your phone off airplane mode. Notifications come rolling through, emails from work, a missed call from mom, and one text from the man himself. 

Daniel   10:05 AM Never

You learned how much Daniel loved Monza in September. He found victory in his despair there, saw the triumphs and falls of so many racers before him. Daniel loved Monza. 

Daniel   11:03 AM The energy is great, you should’ve come out. 

The invite was on the table, he had asked you two weeks ago if it was something you’d be interested in attending. You should’ve said yes– any sane person would’ve. But you couldn’t, as much as you wanted to see him again, to be able to talk to him in person and just be with him, you couldn’t say yes. You’d never be able to explain it, other than the fact that you were shy, and holding onto a bit of your Mykonos fantasy. You liked living in a world where your friendship was only something between you and Daniel. You liked the bit of distance, found comfortability in it. At least for now. 

So you opted to keep up with him through text and the telly. You exchanged messages until he had to set his phone down, then watched each session, each day. Practice. Qualifying. Race Day.

You   12:01 PM Good luck. I’ll be here for the debrief.

The debrief was a series of texts, mostly from Daniel. It’s every broken hope, every could’ve, should’ve, would’ve that ever crossed his mind. It was you trying to console a broken spirit, to reignite something in him that was already dead. He took your words with grace every time, even if you both knew he didn’t believe a single letter of it. 

You   12:02 PM You’re gonna do great.

Daniel   12:04 PM It’s gonna be great.

You smiled at the optimism, at least you hoped that’s what it was. You sat back on race day, watched every second of coverage– from the driver’s parade to the pre-race talk. You saw glimpses of Daniel, of the beloved honey badger. And oh how everyone loved Daniel. Everyone rooted for Daniel, to bring glory to a gloriless team like he had just one year prior. Oh how everyone believed in Daniel too, even if he didn’t quite believe in himself. 

Daniel loved Monza, even if  Monza didn’t love him back. 

It was a painful watch, the final lap of the race was coming into view… and then his car sprung a leak. And that was it, that was the end. Goodbye to the glory, goodbye to the hope. 

You didn’t expect to hear from him that night, so it was to your surprise when your phone pinged as his name appeared on your screen. You set your little late-night snack aside, leaning back into the couch as you open the message.

Daniel   9:00 PM Wish you came anyways. Would’ve made the weekend worth its while

You smiled. 

You   9:01 PM Next time. Promise. 

Daniel   9:03 PM Next time &lt;3

Daniel facetimed you for the first time in October. It caught you off guard. You had been exchanging texts with him since you had seen him last, an occasional voice note from you or him, but it was never anything more than that. 

You were cooking dinner. Your hair was up in a disarray, looped carelessly through an elastic in hopes to cool your body down from the heat in your kitchen. You had marinara sauce on the collar of your old high school t-shirt, and you looked less than flattering in the maroon basketball shorts from an ex-boyfriend long long ago. But he was calling, his name and face occupying your screen. He was interrupting a video you were watching because he was calling. 

You swiped your phone across the screen, holding it up to give a view of your shoulders to the top of your head. Daniel smiled, wet curls stuck to his forehead. He was clad in black hoodie, airpods tucked into his ears. You hadn’t seen him so happy post-race, the string of bad results and over all bad luck had been wearing him down. You knew it, he knew it, hell the whole world knew it. But here he was, smiling like he had won the whole damn thing. 

He said your name like it tasted sweet, dripping like honey from his lips. “Did you watch?” 

You propped your phone against the towel holder, shaking your head as you do. “No, I was working on a project. I meant to watch the highlights while I ate dinner.” 

“What are you cooking?” 

“Pasta.” You felt your cheeks heat up. He clicked his tongue against the roof of his mouth.

“This is the third night in a row.” 

“I just need something quick. Pasta’s always quick!” You defended. 

He rolled his eyes playfully, biting back a smile. You saw it in the way his cheeks began to round, lips pursed. “Well hurry up. I’ll be your highlight reel for dinner.” 

True to his word, Daniel gave you the brief play-by-play of his race in Singapore, the whopping fifth-place finish– best finish he’s had all year.  You listened intently, shoveling penne pasta and red sauce into your mouth. You listened and listened, even if he repeated the same moment over and over, with the same excitement, same enthusiasm like he was back in the moment. There was a twinkle in his eyes, the slight inflection in his tone as the words spilled from his mouth. It made your heart soar for him, it made you happy to see him. 

But then someone flipped a switch, the mood suddenly dampened as his eyes trailed off camera and his smile slowly began to fade. You pushed your empty bowl aside, pulling your phone closer to you. “Hey. What’s wrong?”

He sighed, “I just wish it was always like this, you know? Miss feeling this… this good after a race. God and it’s almost ridiculous how happy I am for P5. P-fucking-5. But it feels like I’m on the podium. I just wish I had felt this all year.” 

You didn’t know what to say. What was there to say? You couldn’t exactly relate or empathize, and you know that the last thing he needed was your sympathy. He’d been getting sympathy since he had lost his seat, and the last thing he needed was to hear it from you. So you hum, pulling his gaze back to you. 

“I’m proud of you.” 

“You say that all that time.” He scrunched his nose, a teasing expression almost as if he didn't believe you. .

“Maybe because it’s true.” You snarked back, biting back a smile.

A brief pause. You watched his honey brown eyes dart around the screen, staring at you. At every freckle and beauty mark, surely the smeared mascara under your eyes or the faded color that stained your lips. But he wore a smile, wore a bit of adoration and… god you couldn’t identify what that ‘and’ was, but it was nice. 

“Thanks.” 

He kept you company for the rest of the evening, even sat on the phone staring at your bedroom ceiling while you showered and got ready for bed. And when you finally rolled into your duvet, hair brushed and skincare, Daniel was snoring softly on the phone. It was four in the morning in Singapore, the weekend had finally worn him down. You only indulged in the serenity for a moment, before whispering a quick goodnight Daniel and hanging up. 

He called again when he got to Japan, showed you the tiny hotel room he had in Tokyo, gave you a list of places he and Lando planned to visit. 

He called before he flew out to L.A. When he landed. When he traveled to and from and across the States until COTA weekend came around. 

Daniel never stopped calling, and you never hesitated to answer. 

Daniel gave you a nickname in November. You argued about it over the phone, while you packed your work bag for the following Monday. You had him propped up on your nightstand, phone leant up against your lamp. He laughed at your reaction, the grimace on your face as he called you again.

“Oh come on toots, I think it’s cute.” You shook your head, “Why not?”

“I’m not toots Daniel.” You slipped your new pens into the little pocket in your purse, “Look at me, do I look like a toots?”

He laughed. It’s the kind of laughter that’s from deep in his belly, the kind that fades out a bit with every syllable. He fell back into his bed, sinking into his gray pillow case as he held his phone over his head. He watched you pack the rest of your bag before slipping into bed yourself. It was the first time since meeting him that you were in the same time zone. He was back in Monaco, and you in London where you had always been. There were only two races left in the season. Two weekends left of Daniel in the car.

He was calling more often than not. And maybe you could blame the short break before Brazil and Abu Dhabi, but you knew Daniel a little more than that. You didn’t make a comment about it though, just accepted the opportunity to talk to him more. 

You turn in your bed, setting Daniel up against the pillow by you. It was a good kind of quiet, a comfortable silence. The kind that brings about a certain… domesticity to the feel of your home, even if he was just on your phone. You liked having him there, even if really wasn’t there. 

“How ya feeling?” You asked softly, pulling the covers under your chin. 

He huffed a breath, “It just doesn’t feel quite real, if I’m being honest. My brain knows it’s happening but my heart… I don’t know. It’s cheesy. It’s weird.” You hummed in acknowledgement, shifting a bit in your place. “But it’ll be good. It’ll be fine.”

“It will. It will. You will.” 

He smiled, nodded. “But you know what’ll make it better?” You raised your brow, a soft hm buzzing from behind your lips. He grinned cheekily, “If you came and watched me in Abu Dhabi, toots.” 

Your heart swelled even if you scowled. Daniel hadn’t bothered to invite you to a race since Monza, which is fine. You were busy with work, and there really wasn’t a break long enough for Daniel to get an invite together for you. And plus, you had already declined him once. 

“My family is coming out, close friends too. But the entourage wouldn't be complete if I didn’t have you in the garage.” 

You pulled the blanket over your face to hide the way it turned red. And much to your surprise, he didn’t tease. No playful comments or layers of compliments to make your cheeks tinge red. No knowing laughter, or gentle chuckle. Just soft, patient breathing, waiting quietly for your answer. Your heart, however, was beating out of your chest. It was so loud you could hear it in your head. It echoed, bounced off the curve of your skull. You tried to steady your breathing, tried to ease the uneasiness that resides in your chest. It was the nerves, the threat– a mere opportunity to make all this real. 

Three months and some days had passed since you met Daniel. Three months and some days had passed since you said goodbye. Three months and some days spent dreaming of the smell of fresh rain, warm hugs, and honey brown eyes. Three months and some days. 

“Absolutely no pressure. But it would mean the world to me if you did.” 

Seeing Daniel in person would mean that you are more to him than some girl on the phone. It would mean that all this was more than the twenty or thirty something hours together in Mykonos three months ago. Flying out to Abu Dhabi would mean the world to him, and a galaxy to you. 

You pulled the covers off your face just in time to see Daniel run his fingers through his frizzy curls. He works his fingers over his head, stuffing it between him and the pillow behind him. The muscles in his arms bulge, stretch the sleeve of his athletic t shirt. You wondered if your cheeks got redder. His eyes move off screen, humming a soft tune that barely makes the airwaves to you, but you can hear it just under his shuffling about. He pulls up the covers, you see the edge of his gray sheet come into view. You watched for a few seconds more, watched him settle into his space, snuggled under the covers, before his eyes come back up to meet your gaze. 

He smiled. You smiled. It was nice. It was good. 

“So… when do I fly out?” 

Abu Dhabi was a spectacle, buzzing with energy for the final race of the season. It was impossible to escape that kind of excitement, even outside of the paddock. You heard the buzz, the excitement of who was going to win the race, even if the winner was already spoken for. You enjoyed the optimism, the smiling faces, the feeling of being there in that moment. It was a last for Daniel for the foreseeable future. You were privy to the toll the last couple of years have been on him, the stress, the sadness, the disappointment at the results he continued to produce. But the end was finally here, his final race in orange before a much needed break. It was sad, but it was good.

The hotel was swarmed with fans, waiting for the opportunity to meet their favorite driver. There were heads of bright orange and red, contrasting against the black and navy. The entrance was crowded with people, it was damn near impossible to get through and check in. But you managed with the help of a young busboy, who complained and pushed through a group of crazed fans. It wasn’t long from there, and soon you were flopping onto the queen bed of your hotel room with a loud sigh. Nearly seven hours on the plane had wiped you out, and if it weren’t for the fact you promised to meet Daniel, you would’ve fallen asleep right there. 

But alas, you forced yourself out of bed, stood in the hot shower to wash away the dirty air. You were cleaner, and in turn much more nervous. Have you scrubbed enough? Did the scent of your shampoo stick? Oh god how did you have enough time to do your hair? Will it dry in time? 

You couldn’t stomach finding out the answer. 

You pocketed air in your cheeks as you paced to and from the mirror to your unzipped luggage. You had overpacked– of course you did– and had about half the items strewn across the floor as you tried and failed to find an outfit worth meeting Daniel in again. A dress seemed a bit much and somehow every single pair of jeans you packed squeezed on your stomach a little more than you’d like. You huffed after the fourth outfit, soured mood as you stepped into sweat shorts and an old sweatshirt from college. You were meant to meet Daniel in less than an hour and you were stuck at square one: your hair a ratty mess, make-up strewn across the bathroom sink (untouched), and your luggage exploding with clothes you suddenly hated.

You stood, stared at yourself in the mirror as you gripped on your hairbrush, running it through tangles and an otherwise unruly mess. You dragged and pulled until your hair was smooth. But even then it wasn’t smooth enough, you just didn’t have it in you to care. Your makeup was dragged across your face. You went through the motions, all muscle memory and not a thought about the colors and products. And even at the end of all that, after getting yourself to look less haggard and have your hair somewhat presentable, you still couldn’t stand to look at the mess you’ve made in your room. 

You went back over your options, moving through the motions of retrying combinations, mixing and matching, and then putting them away when you concluded you didn’t like the choice. By the end of the hour, you had gotten your room semi-presentable but were still stuck in your loungewear. 

And then there’s a knock. 

You scratched the back of your head, a little more nervous and a little more irritated. A soft whine escapes you as you stomped your way to the front door. You yanked it open without even bothering to look through the peephole, mind far from any clue as to who it might even be. 

But who else could it be?

Daniel smiled with his hands stuffed into his pockets, Enchante hoodie hanging loosely on his shoulders. His curls sit atop his head, messy, flopped over his forehead. His stubble has grown, or maybe it just appears thicker in person. But he stood there, smiling in the hallway, lips parted and ready to greet you if you had given him a chance. 

You jumped into his arms like you belonged there, like a magnet pulled to metal. You held on for dear life, arms wrapped tightly as you stuffed your face into the crook of his neck. He smelled just as you remembered– smelled just like home. Slowly, one arm finds its rightful place around your torso while the other comes up so that his free hand could hold your head securely against him. His hold is firm as he lifts you off your feet, squeezes you so nicely you never wanted him to stop. You could’ve stood in that hallway like that forever, if it was ever an option. 

Daniel inhaled deeply. “Oh, I’ve missed you so much.” 

“I missed you more.” Your voice seeped into his skin– hot, meaningful, and everything else left in you to give. 

He put you down, but you didn’t want him to. His hands come up to hold your face in his hands while his eyes scanned every bit of you. No words, just a gentle hold. You stood there, head heavy in his hands as you stared right back up at him. His tan had faded a bit, his hair much more kempt than you remember. And his hands, oh his hands are rough, loved so well by the life he’s led and yet they move with so much care, so much tenderness. The dim hallway light reflected off his wrist, off blue beads tied together by a black straps. Your heart jumped, warmed at the bracelet you bought him all those months ago around his wrist.

“Looking good toots.” 

He laughed loudly as your face contorted into a grimace. Your hands come up to his chest to shove him off, a blow he takes with a grin as he takes a step back. And in succession, his slender fingers wrap around your wrist to pull you back into him. 

“I don’t like that nickname.” You swatted his chest, palm and the back of your hand colliding with the soft material of his hoodie, over and over until he’s holding your wrist still while muttering I’m kidding over and over.

You rolled your eyes as you removed yourself from his hold. You invited him into your room, taking quick steps to shut your open luggage before he had a chance to see the carnage of it all. Daniel closed the door behind him for you before he followed your lead into the small hotel room. He plopped himself onto your bed, kicking off his shoes before pushing himself further up. He watched as you folded up the bit of clothes that you had left out sitting on top of your closed luggage before sitting across from him. You smiled, he smiled. Just how it’s always been. 

Things sort of unraveled from there. Plans were canceled, phones tossed aside– nothing really mattered anymore. He asked about your flight, you asked about his. He asked about your work, you asked about his. It was back and forth, back and forth, jumping from one bit to the next until three hours had rolled by and Daniel had taken notice. By then you rolled onto your back, hair handing off the bed and legs lounging on top of Danny’s. He’s leant up against the headboard, arms crossed across his middle as he hum contentedly. You looked over at him, reaching over to squeeze his arm. 

“Thank you for inviting me.” 

His hand removed itself from underneath his arm, placing it over yours. “Thank you for coming.” 

November in Abu Dhabi was not as hot as you expected it to be. For once you were grateful for over packing because otherwise you would’ve been miserable and slightly embarrassed by the initial four outfits you deemed as enough for the trip.

You met Daniel’s family on Friday. They were just finishing breakfast when you walked up to the McLaren building. Daniel was quick to stand on his feet, hand resting on the small of your back as he gestured to each family member with his free hand. You were introduced as a friend, shook the hands of his relatives with a tight smile as you went down the line. They were sweet, offered to sit with you while you ate breakfast. But you were quick to decline, having already eaten before getting to the paddock. 

There were a few familiar faces amongst Daniel’s friends, if your drunken memory serves you correctly. You were greeted with enthusiastic hellos and semi-awkward side hugs. You stood with them in the garage, arms crossed tightly around yourself as you stood around waiting for the man himself. The garage was chaotic, multiple bodies moving too and from and all at once, trying to ready for the two practice sessions of the day. Your headphones were tuned to the live broadcast, so you spent the next fifteen or so minutes of commentary about Red Bull this and Ferrari that, Max this, Charles that. But then you hear it. Here comes the Honey Badger, about to hop into the car for the first Practice session of his last weekend with McLaren– his last weekend in Formula 1. 

Your head turned to look up at the screen just in time to see Daniel smiling at the camera, tuning out the conversation about Daniel between commentators. He waved into the lens before turning to Michael. They exchange a few words, the camera just zooming in before switching back to the Ferrari garage. You avert your gaze back to the present, the bodies clearing to make way for Daniel to climb into his car. The loved driver walks down the line of his friends, exchanging fistbumps and a bit of laughter before finally standing up before you. 

You could feel the stares, the careful watching to see what you two were about to exchange? A couple of light hearted jokes? A fistbump? Maybe even a hug?

You tried to ignore it, looking up at him with a smile you hoped resembles the bit of faith you had in him. “Have fun out there.” Your hands fiddled with each other, nervous nails picked at the skin of your cuticles. 

“Thanks. I’ll see you for the debrief?” 

You blew out a breath, nodding. “Yeah. Yeah, I’ll see you.” 

You didn’t see him until after the round of press after both practice sessions, but of course it was only for a fleeting moment. He had his arm wrapped around your shoulders to give you a gentle squeeze as he asked about you– always you. And then, with much reluctance, he allowed you to return to the hotel while he stayed back for another briefing. 

Quali day proved to be even more energetic than the last. People moved faster, time ticked louder, and the cars pushed and pushed. You enjoyed the smell of burnt rubber, of the adrenaline that ran through the track. You held your breath for most of the day, eyes trained on the times put up, jaw clenched as Daniel clawed his way to Q3. The air in the McLaren garage is light, happy, hopeful, as the boys stroll back into the garage. Rough pats to the back and loud words of encouragement roll through. Daniel was followed by a crowd of people. They all spoke atop each other, trying to get the last word in and trying to get a response from the driver before he disappeared. But he was already gone the moment he laid eyes on you. He waved the people away. Later, later he mumbled, offering them a smile before speeding up the pace and leaving the people to wait on later. You stood when Daniel approached, allowing him to wrap one arm around you in a quick squeeze. 

“Congratulations Danny,” You looked up at him, smiling widely as you leaned into his hold. 

“Thanks sugar.” There was a pause, allowing the nickname to sink in before he scrunched up his nose and shook his head. You burst out in soft giggles and he grinned widely. “Somehow that’s worse than toots.” 

“Definitely worse.” 

Race day was exhilarating. It was a rush, even if you were only sitting in the garage. You had your legs crossed over each other, muscles tense the entire time. You couldn’t relax, not while you held out for a bit of hope in Daniel’s race. Maybe no one expected much from him these days, but you expected nothing short of greatness. You sat in your chair, silently praying that Daniel would find that sweet release, the sweetest satisfaction in that car. You gripped the lanyard of your pass tightly, leant forward towards the screens as if it would make him move faster. You spoke to him, even if he couldn’t hear you through the turns of the circuit. 

And then it happened. The checkered flag was waved, the race had been won, the champion continued his reign. The night saw multiple ends, the night closed on the last of the honey badger in McLaren. While everyone jeered for Max, applauded for Sebastian, bid adieu to Nicky and Mick, you held your heart for Daniel. Your eyes watered as he spun the MCL36 in circles, sending smoke and his love to the crowd as they said their goodbyes. Quietly, you slipped back into the McLaren Hospitality, sat around by the door of his driver room as he got done with the last of press. You watched on the screens, like you always do, watched the laughter, the happiness, the adoration exchanged between Daniel and his comrades. All the hugs and see you soons, all the hope every single person held for him and his return. 

Daniel was a friend to everyone, beloved by everyone, and that included you. You felt a bit of pride at the thought, but maybe a bit of emptiness at the potential. Daniel was your friend, albeit your best friend. He had become your person, even if you had spent most of your time getting to know him through the screen. But that didn’t negate the fact. It didn’t change the affection you had for him, the adoration and respect you kept for Daniel in your heart. It didn’t change the fact that maybe, just maybe, you felt more for him than you’d ever admit. But that was a little secret between you and your bedroom ceiling. 

Daniel returned to you by himself. No crowds of people begging for a second of his attention, no staff reading off his agenda, not even Michael trying (and failing) to make Daniel laugh. He was all by himself, tired, disheveled, shoulders slumped and his face expressionless. You stood at one end of the room of the McLaren Hospitality and Daniel at the other. You stared at each other, unsure what was left to say after everything that happened in the hours behind him. 

And then you see it– the water brimming in his eyes, the quiver of his bottom lip. You saw the frown that curved into his lips, the way his chest puffed shakily as he drew a breath. He was stuck in his place, stuck in the sadness that had finally settled in his spirit. So you met him where he stood, arms wrapping around his frame so that he could finally, finally, let go. His hands held you close to his chest, the pads of his fingers pressing into your shoulder blades. He buried his face in your shoulder, squeezing you so tightly that you found it hard to breathe. 

“It’s really over.” 

You pulled his face from your skin to hold in your hands, pouting as your thumbs collected the sadness that spilled onto his cheeks. Left to right, up and down, you scanned his face– every freckle and wrinkle, the way his bottom lip protrudes in a pout. “You’re gonna be okay. It’s all gonna be okay. It’ll be good. Okay?”

He nodded, head shaking quickly in your grasp as his hands scramble to pull you back into him. He held you like you were going to slip away just as every single good thing in his life had this last year.  His hand comes up to the back of your neck, holding firm and warm, as he inhales deeply. “ It’ll be okay. It’ll be good.” 

It’ll be good. 

Daniel sent you flowers in December.

An arrangement of yellow and orange poppies arrived at your door two days before Christmas. They were waiting for you when you arrived from last minute shopping. You picked up the vase, cradled it in your arms as your keys jingled into the keyhole. The windmill keychain from August twinkled in the dim hallway lighting, reminded you of the day spent with your favorite person. 

You set the flowers down on the counter, all other belongings forgotten at your feet. You picked at the small envelope that sat in the middle of the vibrant flowers. Inside, a note– typed, but the sign off was enough to tell you who had sent them. 

𝙵𝚘𝚛 𝚝𝚑𝚎 𝚙𝚎𝚛𝚜𝚘𝚗 𝚠𝚑𝚘 𝚖𝚊𝚍𝚎 𝚖𝚎 𝚏𝚎𝚎𝚕 𝚊𝚕𝚒𝚟𝚎 𝚠𝚑𝚎𝚗 𝙸 𝚏𝚎𝚕𝚝 𝚕𝚒𝚔𝚎 𝙸 𝚠𝚊𝚜 𝚍𝚢𝚒𝚗𝚐. 𝙼𝚎𝚛𝚛𝚢 𝙲𝚑𝚛𝚒𝚜𝚝𝚖𝚊𝚜 𝙿𝚘𝚙𝚙𝚢. 

-𝟹

Your heart swelled. Swelled so big you were sure it was going to burst underneath you. You bite down on your bottom lip, hard, trying to fight the awe-struck– no, lovestruck, smile that creeped onto your face. You tried to swallow those feelings down, just as you had for months now. Forget the butterflies and what they symbolize, or the way you jumped at the sound of your phone pinging or ringing. Forget, forget, forget.

Except that you can’t forget. You can’t forget or ignore or pretend like you haven’t fallen for this… this… for him. It’s not doable, and you had been fooling yourself thinking that if you pretended for long enough, that those feelings would cease to exist. Instead they festered, grew into a monster that held you tightly. In between blue and gray text bubbles, after hour long facetime calls, you found yourself falling for him. It was hard to admit to yourself because you felt silly at the notion that you could feel that way for someone you talked to on the phone. But it wasn’t silly, it was so fucking real. You were consumed by the smell of fresh fallen rain and curly hair, consumed by chasing the feeling of him gnawing at your heart. You were all consumed by Daniel. Him, him, him. 

You took a photo of the flowers, sending it as a text. 

You   5:24 PM Poppy, huh? 

His response was almost immediate. 

Daniel   5:24 PM You like it? 

You smiled. Smiled so wide your face ached. Daniel was halfway around the world. Fourteen something thousand kilometers away from you. He spent Christmas in the warmth, surrounded by his family while you were bearing it in bitter cold London. Thousands and thousands in distance, and still he makes you smile like he was sitting in the room with you.

You   5:25 PM Love it. Thank you Danny 

Christmas came and went as it always does. And in the week between then and the end of the year, Daniel called you. His face occupied your phone screen, that stunning smile plastered on his face. It was ten in the morning on the 27th of December, you were in the middle of a book– one you had been putting off because of work and traveling and enjoying the reality with Daniel in it. So you were reading, but then he called and the passage was forgotten. 

He claimed he had no reason to call you, that it was just because. It made your heart do flips, stupidly and erratically beating at the notion just because. You smiled, hummed as a response as you set the book aside. You asked about his holiday, he asked about yours. And just as easily as it has been before, the conversation sprouted into hours on the phone. You had slowly retreated into your bedroom, under the covers, had Daniel propped on the pillow just like he belonged. It was space reserved for him, even if he’s never laid in your bed before. God you left so much room for him in your life, he didn’t even know the half of it. He had become part of your equation, part of every what if that came across your mind– it was truly terrifying. 

Daniel quieted around twelve for you. He was sitting back on his couch, phone resting in his palm as he held it up high enough you had a view of his face. His gaze was soft as he stared at you, smiling sweet. 

“What?” You asked softly. 

“Nothing.” 

Another pause in the conversation. A brief moment of silence with an unasked question hanging in the space between you. You almost wanted to pry, but he beat you to the punch– answered the impending what you were about to whine.

“I’m flying back to Monaco for New Years… and I was wondering if you wanted to come.”

You raised a brow. “You miss me?”

“I always do.”

Your heart screeched, cheeks ached with another smile. God you couldn’t stop fucking smiling. 

You shook your head, “Silly.” 

“Not silly. Just true. Come to Monaco. Please?”

How could you ever say no to him? How could you ever allow yourself to miss an opportunity to see Daniel again?

So on the 29th of December you flew the two something hours to Nice, took the train to Monaco and jumped straight into Daniel’s arms. He held you like it's all he ever knew, arms wrapped so tightly you’re sure you’d be stuck to him even if he let go. Your face is pressed into his sternum, his scent consuming you with a sharp inhale. Fuck, you would never get tired of this. 

December 30 was quiet– the calm before the storm. You were glued to the couch, Daniel’s hip attached to yours, while you watched movie after movie. In the first hour your legs were on top of his, then you switched the next hour. After the second movie, you were tucked into his side while his fingers twirled a lock of your hair. Round and round, a semblance to the way your mind circled him. Your thoughts ran in circles around Daniel, about what it would be like to be able to live that reality for longer than the week you were spending with him. You allowed yourself to imagine more Friday’s spent lazily with him. 

Daniel looked down at you as the credits rolled. “Thanks for coming out. I haven’t said it, and I should’ve the moment you landed.” 

You hummed, leaning into him further. He tightened his hold on you, it made you feel safe. “Anything for you.” 

Truly, anything for him. You would do it all, all Daniel had to do was ask. 

You woke up later than normal on the last day of the year. You laid in the guest bedroom of Daniel’s Monaco apartment, alone, tangled in sheets that regrettably smell just like him. The sound of glass clinking and heavy footsteps moving about the space travels into your room, muffled by the shut door. And as easily as you fall into a state of bliss at the sound, your mind rolls in daydreams about what it would be like to wake up to it over and over and over again. You were losing yourself, you knew that, but there was nothing stopping you from doing so. You free fall into the imagination of domesticity with Daniel and how easy and good it would all be. 

Three soft taps. Are you up? 

“Yeah, come in.” You sit up in bed, doing your best to comb down your bed head with the palm of your hands. Daniel poked his head through first before his body followed. You watched quietly as he made his way around the room, rolling into bed right next to you. He laid his head down against the pillow and you fought the urge to lay with him. Instead, you lean against the plush headboard and stare down at him. 

“Happy New Year's Eve,” His voice is hoarse, thick with sleep. Surely he’d just woken up.

You rubbed your eyes, smiled all the while. “Happy New Year's Eve.” 

He turned over, smiling into the fabric of his pillow case as he threw his arm over your thighs. Like it’s normal, like he’d done it before. “I was going to ask you if you wanted to get breakfast, but I think I could use another hour of sleep.” 

Your fingers twirled his curls, round and round, as you nodded. “Sleep then.” 

“Wake me in an hour? Then I promise we can go get breakfast.” 

“One hour. Gotcha.” 

Your fingers grazed his scalp, massaged his head of curls as he quickly fell back asleep. His body was limp next to yours, hot breath beating down on your skin. 

True to your words, you shook him awake an hour after he fell asleep. It’s been an hour. He groaned softly, arm tightening around your legs and pulling himself against the soft skin of your flesh. Five more minutes. You didn’t have it in you to pry, so you let him fall back asleep. Soft snores fill the space of the guest bedroom, and you sit there for another five minutes. You shook him once more, but he was a goner, lost in a deep sleep and dreams you could only wish to know. 

Slowly, gently, reluctantly, you pulled yourself from Daniel’s hold. You padded your way through his apartment, getting yourself acquainted with where things belong, in search of breakfast because while Daniel was too tired to care, you were hungry and needed food sooner rather than later. 

You cooked an omelet, made use of the last of his eggs and the veggies that were in his fridge. You could do without bacon for now– well you had to because he didn’t have it. You allowed the soft sizzle in the pan to lull your nerves to a sort of calmness you haven’t had since being here with Daniel. You tried to find a bit of clarity for yourself as you made breakfast. And right when you think you’re okay, that the daydreams and the yearning mean nothing, he’s in the room with you. 

He hadn’t said a word yet, but you knew the sound of his feet shuffling. He leaned up against the counter, rubbing his eyes with the back of his hand before watching you expertly flip the cooked egg over. “Sorry,” he muttered. “I promised you breakfast.” 

You shook your head, taking a quick glance up at him with a smile. “That’s okay, Danny. Want one?” 

He nodded, moving around you as he reached for the cupboard above your head. The kitchen was large, spacious, so clearly put together for a bachelor who didn’t spend too much time there. But despite the space, you found yourself bumping into Daniel, feeling the way his fingers trailed along your back as he moved behind you. You moved in sync, bumping into each other was just part of the dance. That’s what it felt like with him, a dance to music only the two of you seem to hear. It was always a dance, of pushing and pulling, going round and round until your head spun. It was beautiful. It was good. 

You didn’t get ready until much later. The sun had just begun to touch the ocean, painting the sky shades of orange. You watched from the guest room, legs crossed while your make-up laid sprawled out on the bed. And while you swiped brush after brush, a pat of a sponge here and there, you grew to envy the ocean. How lucky it is to be kissed, to be loved so badly that the sun returns to it every day. You yearned for the same, to have such warmth sink beneath you and make you feel whole. But most of all, you yearned for Daniel. 

You felt a little ridiculous. You felt stupid, insecure, so goddamn undeserving of the way your heart ached for him. You felt crazed, your head was a mess of thoughts of curly hair and the comforting smell of rain after a drought. You felt ridiculous because Daniel seemed to consume you, and you aren’t even sure if you consumed him in the same way. That’s when the fear settled, the need to run in the opposite direction because my god, what were you doing here? 

You had to stand from your spot on the bed, make up half done and not set, to pace the room. You tried to shake off the way every nerve ending fizzled with this… you couldn’t say it. You couldn’t admit it. Because how could you? Why should you? 

Maybe you hadn’t fallen, maybe this was a misplaced infatuation. Give it a couple more days, maybe even a couple more weeks and he would be nothing more than your friend, nothing more than a person who made life a little easier. Nothing less, nothing more.

But the tears cloud your vision, your hands shook, bile was climbing up the length of your throat. You felt so fucking sick. 

You sit back down in the bad, blowing out a breath through pursed lips. Inhale, exhale. Breathe in, breathe out. You flopped onto your back, tubes and compacts of make-up clattering against each other as the bed rippled your movement. Inhale, exhale. Breathe in, breathe out. It was fine, you were fine, everything was okay. 

Right? 

You aren’t sure how managed to finish getting ready, truth be told the last hour or so were a blur. But you were ready, buckled into the front seat of his McLaren 720s, trying to pace your heart with the heavy bass song playing through the speaker. Daniel was oblivious to your sudden mental turmoil, more than excited to see his friends and celebrate the end of one of the worst years of his life. He had expressed multiple times just how excited he was to let loose, to pretend like his reality isn't real, even if it was just for a couple of hours. 

The club was bass heavy, so loud that you could hear it as Daniel’s car slowed to a stop. Valet opened the door for you, stuck his hand out to help you exit the rather low sports car. Daniel grabbed the ticket before resting his hand on the small of your back and led you into the club. 

It was packed, filled to the brim with people who were probably so drunk they wouldn’t make it to midnight. You followed the bouncer’s lead, along the perimeter of the club and into the section behind the DJ booth. You recognized a few faces, some who were in the garage with you, others who drove the car. You were introduced, reintroduced, Daniel shouted your name over the blaring music. This is my best friend! 

Best friend. Best friend. Best friend. 

You smiled, tight lipped and polite, even though the panic had begun to return. You shouldn’t be there, you shouldn’t have come. Fuck, fuck, fuck. You needed a drink.

You needed several drinks– and several were served to you. Vodka this, vodka that. Oh a round of shots, why not? You had begun to lose yourself to the booze and the music, the nerves and the panic long forgotten. All that mattered was that you were moving along to the bass and that you felt good. You couldn’t feel the way your toes screamed in pain, begging you to sit down, even for a second. 

You only stopped because you had taken another shot and the world suddenly tilted to the left. Daniel met you on the sofa, arm resting on the back of it as he leant down to talk into your ear. “Slow down Poppy, we still got an hour til midnight!” 

You looked up at him with wide eyes, leaning into him because god you just needed to feel him. His hand fell onto your shoulder, holding you firmly. His lips mouthed something. Water? It must’ve been. You nodded, throat suddenly dry. You clicked your tongue against the roof of your mouth in a feeble attempt to get rid of the cottonmouth. Daniel handed you a glass, and you sipped. You sipped until the ground leveled and your mind didn’t spin in circles. Sipped on the glass until Lando pushed it out of your hands and replaced it with a flute of champagne. Ten minutes! Fuck had that much time pass you by already? 

Slender fingers slipped onto your waist as you stood from the couch, the pads of his digits pressing firmly into your flesh. You felt secure, safe. Your mind still teetered between sobriety and inebriety, but you knew you’d remember the following moments for the rest of your life. 

Ten minutes turned into five, turned into one. And then you were counting down the seconds. The club was loud, the excitement building as you ticked closer to one. Daniel’s arm moved from your torso to hang over your shoulder. He pulled you into his side, squeezing tighter and tighter as he counted down. 5… 4… 3… 2… 1… Happy New Year! The crowd erupted into a mess of cheers, of heavy bass and the pop of streamers. Lights flickered, and you caught brief glances of hugs and kisses, of happy welcomes and excitement of what 2023 was meant to bring. And oh how you wished that it was you. That you were a person in the crowd being kissed, even if it was some cheesy cliche. You just wished it were you. 

You made the mistake of looking up at Daniel, of letting curiosity get the best of you to see if he was seeing what you were. You wanted to know if he had the same desire written on his face as it was on yours. But instead, his gaze was already on you. Your cheeks burned, and you thanked the heavens that the lights distracted from the fact that you were blushed. Daniel smiled widely, removing his hand from your shoulder to rest on the side of your head. He pulled you into him, lips pressing into the soft skin of your temple. Once, twice. Then he craned his neck, pressed a kiss to your cheek before letting his lips hover over your ear.

“Happy New Year, Poppy.” 

You smiled, turned your head again so you could selfishly look into his honey eyes again. And maybe you knew that in doing this, your face would only be mere centimeters apart. All it would take is a simple lunge, an accidental shove. So close, so fucking close. You silently wished that he would, that he’d give into the cliche and kiss you. Your brain was screaming, begging. Kiss me! Just fucking kiss me! But all he did was smile. Dimples imprint themselves into the soft skin of his cheeks, his gaze so soft you wanted to vomit. He looked at you in a way that made you dizzier than all the liquor you consumed that night.  His hand comes up to cup your cheek, touch just ghosting your skin before planting firmly on the junction of your neck and jaw. Kiss me! Please kiss me! Won’t he do it?

You felt his fingers leave your cheek, creep to the back of your head and once again he’s pulling you in to kiss your forehead. 

You sighed, spirit deflated, even as you shut your eyes and leaned into the kiss once more. 

He cupped your cheeks again, both hands this time, squishing the soft flesh as he forced your  gaze up at him. He couldn’t see the disappointment in your features, too distracted by the lights, the music, by everything else. He smiled. He always smiled. “I love you Poppy, I love you, I do!”

Your heart flipped, rattled your ribs, beat loudly in your fucking head. You bit back a smile even though all you wanted to do was grin. You scrunch your nose, feigned disgust even if you were elated. He loved you, he loved you he did. 

You fell in love with Daniel in January.

Though, you’re sure that you had loved him for much longer. January was when you fully admitted it to yourself. No more denying, no more panic. Pure acceptance for the fact that you were in love with Daniel Ricciardo. 

You left Monaco on the second, much to your dismay. If you had it your way, you would’ve stayed forever. But work had resumed and your boss only let you take off an extra day and nothing more. So Daniel drove you to the train station, dragged your luggage out of his car and walked you all the way to the gate. Your ticket was clenched tightly in your first as you looked up at him, a bit of wind blowing at the stray hairs that couldn’t be held back by the elastic. He reached out, tucked a hair behind your ear before resting his hand against your cheek. It was warm, reeked of generic hand sanitizer. You leaned into him, smiling even if your chest ached. 

“Wish you could stay longer.” He muttered. 

“Wish you would just come with,” You countered. With me, you wanted to emphasize but… the statement seemed too intimate. With me. Come with me, please. 

He hummed, fingers hooking around the back of your neck to pull you into him. Your face collided with his chest in a soft thump, nose dug deep in the plush material of his t-shirt, just above his sternum. His hands readjust themselves around you, conforming to your frame against his body. Like a puzzle tab finding its perfect nook. He hugged you tightly, planted a kiss to the top of your head before flattening the hair in the same spot. You’d miss this, you thought to yourself, the few kisses given, the plethora of hugs exchanged, you were going to miss this. You were going to miss him. 

You’re the first to step out of the embrace, blinking away tears that had just begun to blur your vision. You coughed an awkward laugh, smiled, tried about anything to hide how sad you really were in the moment. But Daniel saw right through you, clicked his tongue as he nudged your chin playfully. 

“Don’t do that. Don’t cry.” 

His words had the opposite effect, pushed the tears over the brim of your waterline. You tried to laugh it off, mock yourself and the ridiculous splay of emotions. You shook your head and swatted his hands away as he reached out to you again. “I’m fine, I'm fine. If you hug me again, I’m afraid I may just end up staying.” 

Daniel’s reflexes were quick, right hand jolting forward to latch onto yours. He easily pulled you into him, quick enough so that you could catch the way his body rumbled with a chuckle beneath your touch. “I don’t see why that’s such a bad thing.” You indulged, melted right back into him, inhaled the sweet sweet smell of his cologne, committed every node to memory. 

You wondered what the travelers walking to and fro, squeezing past you without an ounce of politeness, were thinking of the two of you. Could they see it? Could they feel it? Or were you just two losers standing in a train station delaying a needed goodbye? 

Daniel pressed a gentle kiss against your cheek, soft lips catching you by surprise. His head dipped into your neck, arms squeezing you tightly. “I’ll miss you my little wildflower.” 

You grinned, stifled a little laughter at the cheesy nickname as you inhaled deeply, “You’re getting really good at this nickname thing,” You teased, fingers coming up to play with the short hairs on the nape of his neck. “I like Poppy more.” 

His body vibrated in a quiet chuckled, nodding against your shoulder. Noted. 

You pulled away again, eyes flickering to the clock for a brief moment before your fingers latched onto the handle of your luggage. Daniel sighed, tilted his head in a sad smile. You caught the way he flexed his fingers at the release of your own, rings glinting in the light. 

“So… goodbye?” You shrugged and he grinned, “See you soon?” You bit back a smile, “Arrivederci?” 

You giggled, nodding your head, “See you in London.” 

His lips part, a playful and breathy ah falling from his mouth as he nodded. London, London, London he says softly. “I’ll see you there Poppy.” 

You had a multitude of responsibilities waiting for you in London, your boss made that perfectly clear with the two lengthy emails sent to your inbox as you sat on the train. There were unfulfilled plans with friends, a declutter day penciled in for the following Friday, and dinner with your parents. You had a million and one things that needed your attention, and for whatever reason, the five or so hours of travels back home, you spent in thought of Daniel.

His kiss, his touch, his everything was stamped onto you, it was as if it were all happening in that moment.  It made you miss him even more, made your heart ache as you continued to move further and further from him. In the bits of sleep you found in your travels, your mind was consumed by him. Always him. You imagined that this was love, it was the only logical explanation. And so on the plane, while watching your flight path on the screen ahead of you, quietly and honestly, you admitted to yourself that this was love. You were in love. 

And you were terrified.

London greeted you coldly, the wind biting at your cheeks as you lugged your luggage from the Uber to the warm lobby of your complex. The doorman greeted you with a smile, wished you a happy new year as you passed him by. Exhaustion had you by the talons, gripped at your body and spirit and forced you into bed. You crawled underneath your covers, pulled a pillow to your chest as you let sleep take over you. And in your slumber, as you drowned in the fantasy of Daniel and all the what ifs, you miss his call. You missed the first, the second, the third, and then finally the soft ping of his text tone. 

Daniel   8:53 PM Are you awake? Please say you’re awake.

And another.

Daniel 8:55 PM You should’ve stayed. I wish you stayed. 

Daniel flew into London from New York in February. After he had fulfilled every press, interview, tiktok, whatever kind of  obligation being a third driver entailed– he hopped on a plane and flew straight to you.

What was meant to be a surprise turned out to be spoiled by his slight recklessness. He accidentally sent his pinned location to you instead of his friend, and in turn showed you that he was standing in the middle of Heathrow Airport. Then half an hour later, with excited text after text sent and a frenzied cleaning of your apartment, he was at your door and you were jumping into his arms. He laughed, walked you back into your home with one hand wrapped around your torso to keep your feet off the ground, and the other dragging his suitcase. 

You’re here you mumbled into his hoodie, arms squeezing tight. 

I’m here. 

Being with Daniel at home felt good. It felt normal. It felt right. And the longer he stayed, the longer you watched him fit himself in your life, the harder you fell. There was a small part of you that wished he didn’t mold into your routines so well, that a bit of awkwardness had struck and maybe even cured you of this hopeless feeling that clenched your heart so tightly. You wished that his place in your life didn’t make sense but it did. Daniel sitting across from you for breakfast, nursing a second bowl of cereal made sense.  His fingers looping your hair messily through a scrunchie while you cooked dinner made sense. The smell of fresh rain imprinted in every corner of your home just made sense. 

Daniel, walking into your room and sliding into bed next to you while you read a book, made the most sense. You didn’t flinch at the dip in the bed, or the way his shoulder leaned onto you, or the smell of his shampoo in his damp hair. Ignoring your sporadic heartbeat was a challenge, but being here with him was easy. You hummed in acknowledgement, resting your head on his shoulder as you finished out the chapter. You see the glow of his phone screen, the flicker in color as he taps through stories and posts, leaving them all on mute as a courtesy to you. You flipped through a couple more pages before tucking your bookmark in and shutting it. The book falls on your night stand with a soft thud, discarded and forgotten as you turn your attention to Daniel. 

“So I was thinking,” He mused, tapping something on his phone before setting it on his lap, “I leave in three days, so I think it’s only right we have a real sleepover.” 

Your heart did flips. Back flips, cartwheels, a double back handspring with spin and perfect landing. Danced its way all the way to the top of your throat, supported by the nerves and the intent of his proposal. “You tired of the couch?” You teased, stabbing your index finger into his bicep playfully. He chuckled. 

“Only a little. But I’ll gladly sleep on the floor if you’re too chicken to share a bed.” 

You swung your pillow over at him, smacking him in the chest. Shut up, you stuttered, sinking deeper into your bed. You try not to let his loud laughter tinge your cheeks red, to make the tips of your ears heat up as you silently wish the world swallowed you whole. You were being dramatic, maybe. He was teasing, of course you knew he was. But fuck the accusation could not be any truer. You were fucking terrified of sharing a bed with Daniel, how it would blur another line of your friendship, confuse you further, and in turn making saying goodbye in three days time infinitely harder. But you were a little dumbstruck when it came to your affections for Daniel, a little self-indulgent and allowed your little heart to take the reins of all your decision making. 

So that's how you end up lying dangerously close to the edge of your bed, watching as Daniel moved your pillows around to make a little more room for himself. Daniel. Making room for himself. In your bed. 

You were gonna be sick.

He didn’t take too long to settle into his side, pulling on the duvet over his abdomen. Pillows had been thrown to the floor, stuffed animals perched nicely on your desk after you so kindly asked him to. The mattress was bare between the two of you– no pillow wall or some imaginary line established. No claims to a side, or a little jab to remind the other to stay on their side of the bed. Just the plain sheet and a bit of space rests between you. 

Daniel clicked the lamp on his side of the bed off, darkness engulfing the space immediately. It took a minute or two for your eyes to adjust to the dark, to finally be able to trace the silhouette of Daniel’s features against the streetlight bleeding through your curtains. You trace the curls resting on his forehead, the bump on the bridge of his nose, down to the curve or each lip, and the point of his chin. 

“You’re staring,” He muttered. 

“No I’m not.” Yes, you were.

He didn’t comment, just turned onto his side so that he could look at you. Daniel tucked his hand underneath his pillow, pulling it flush against the juncture of his neck and shoulder. The space between you was gaping, large and awkward, begging to be occupied by the warmth of a body– maybe yours. He noticed, pulled the covers down before patting the cream sheet softly. 

“I’m not gonna bite Poppy.” 

You scrunch your nose, reaching out to poke him with your index finger. “How can I be sure?” 

A single poke, pushing the tip of his nose inward before he juts his chin upward, catching your index finger between his teeth. 

“You can’t.”

You turned your face into the pillow as you flexed your hand open, using the force of your other four fingers to push against his face. His laughter rumbled against your palm, lips wet and leaving a stamp of him in the middle of your hand. You feel his slender fingers come up around your wrist to pull your hand away and push it back into your chest. The warmth that emitted from his skin stayed with you, molded into your skin lest you forget how Daniel felt against you. 

You didn’t budge from your position on the bed, and neither did he. Two people with an unreasonable amount of space between them– it was almost laughable. You wondered if he was as scared as you were to cross this line drawn in the sand. You wondered if he was afraid he’d get addicted to holding you, that he might never want to leave. Because you were afraid. You were afraid of losing yourself to a man you had no claim over, and falling so deep into him that you’d never find a way out. So you kept the bit of space, forced a bit of restraint on your heart that seemed to be reaching out to him. 

Sometime between hushed whispers and the soft sounds of sheets rubbing together as you adjusted and readjusted yourself in your place, you fell asleep. You dreamt of the rain, the way it kissed your skin, kissed the Earth and all that is in it. You dreamt of a garden filled with poppies, of bright colored petals that poked out of the grass. You dreamt of familiar smiles, the sound of laughter. God, you dreamt of happiness. 

The sun seeps through your curtains, golden light flooding the room. It shines the brightest between the curtains, peeking through to pull you from your slumber. You groan softly, burying your face deeper into warm skin, pulling the duvet over your shoulder. Toned arms shift around you, hold you tighter before mumbling incoherencies and drifting back to sleep. 

Without the cologne, Daniel  smells like citrus scented soap. Bright, sweet, stuck to his skin even after tossing and turning all night. You almost envy the way he never seems to smell bad, how beautiful smells like peeled oranges or rained-on flowers stick to him. You envy the way he snores softly, clutching on to sleep better than you ever could. Because now you’re awake, mind racing against your heart as you wrap your head around how you laid: tangled up with Daniel. 

You lay stiff, terrified out of your fucking mind as Daniel holds on to you for dear life. He’s so warm. The kind of warmth that compared to the sun beating down on your skin on a cool spring day. The kind that relieves you of goosebumps, of chilly fingertips and the feeling that the tip of your nose might just fall off. Daniel was like the sun in a lot of ways, you conclude. 

You squeezed your eyes shut, trying to force yourself to return back to your dreams. But it burns where your skin meets Daniel’s– hot, sticky, melting together. You can feel the dips of his muscles against you, the firmness to them even if he held you so softly. His arm lays over your torso, curled in towards you to keep you close to him, while his chin rests on the top of your head. Your face is positioned between his collarbones, tip of your nose just ghosting the supple skin there. You try to turn your head, find a place in which you didn’t drown in him, but no matter where you turned, you were comfortably stuck to him. 

Daniel groans above you as you try to turn your head again, squeezing you tighter. “You move too much in your sleep.” Sleep weighs down on his voice, makes it heavy and gravely, rough with exhaustion. You smile, humming as you stuff your face back into his chest. 

“Sorry.” 

He hums, “Morning.” 

“Morning.” 

You lay with Daniel quietly, stuck in the position you woke up in. No one moves, no one speaks, just enjoying the soft lull of steady breathing and the world starting its day without the two of you. Cars pass by your street and birds converse outside your window– you imagine they were talking about the sun. You lay wrapped in Daniel until he shifts, pulling his arm from your torso to rub his sleep-riddled face. You look up, chin resting in the middle of his chest. You watch his lips stretch into a yawn, the way his index finger and thumb come up to wipe the tears that brim at his eyes. And then he cranes his neck, points his chin downwards so that he can catch a glimpse of you. 

And he smiles. 

“Told you I don’t bite.” 

Daniel leaves in three days. He reminds you over breakfast, biting into a piece of toast like it isn’t a big deal. Three days left of this, of breakfast in the mornings and his face before bed. You smile sadly into your oatmeal, mixing the fruit around the slurry before spooning it into your mouth. Silverware clatters against porcelain, it echoes against the walls of your home. It makes your heart miss him before he’s even gone. 

The days blend into the other, no memory seemed to have a cut off. Daniel’s last three days with you were a lump sum of memories, colliding, meshing into each other, dependent on the hours before so that the now made sense. And in every moment, all the laughter and smiles, the almost-touches and almost-kisses, the larger the space in your heart grew for Daniel. Your mind let you wander treacherously through the what-ifs, the maybes, and the could bes. What if we. Maybe we. We could be. We, we, we. 

The night before his flight, you took him to a work thing. That’s how you described it as you helped him pick between two polos. You point at the striped one before flopping onto bed. “It’s just this weird game night. It’s supposed to boost morale, help us bond. It’s been a rough couple months in the office so this is corporate’s way of building– well, rebuilding the peace.” 

Daniel nods, pulling off his shirt before shrugging on the navy striped button up over his shoulders. “So what is it… like poker? Black Jack maybe?” 

You ignore the way his abdomen flexes as he readjust the shirt, the buttons still undone and swaying with his movement. “Maybe. I dunno, I heard someone from accounting was gonna bring scrabble.” 

He laughs like you were joking. But low and behold, as he walked into the pub behind you, three people were already seated at a table elbow deep in a game of scrabble. Tiles scattered the board as two of the three players argued about the validity of the word. Cards were thrown around, smacked on the table to show off a good hand. Poker chips clatter as they’re pushed across the tables, and littered in all that mess is booze being bought left and right. Between the bustling of bodies and the sweet buzz of conversation, you can just hear the bass of some EDM mix playing on the loudspeaker.

You and Daniel make your way to the bar, immediately greeted by the people who work in your department. They smile up at Daniel, wide-eyed as they shoved you playfully. You didn’t tell me you were friends with the Daniel Ricciardo! You mouth a quick I’m sorry as phones are thrusted in his direction– all of which he takes gracefully, taking selfie after selfie. And after maybe the tenth one, you reach into the crowd of people, gripping his wrist tightly as you pull him to you. 

“Alright guys, he’s meant to be on break, leave him alone now.” You wave your hand in the air, shooing away coworkers who just grin and nod, a sea of thank yous sent his way his wrist slips from your grasp to offer them a wave. Daniel grabs the beer set out for the two of you, before slinging his arm over your shoulder and pulling you to a table top in the far end of the bar. He sets the beers down before pulling your chair out for you, hand out for you to boost yourself up onto the lifted chair– a hand you gladly take.

Daniel sits to your left, fingers snaked around the neck of the amber bottle as he brings it up to his lips to take a sip. You watch quietly, spinning the bottle between your index finger and your thumb, eyes fixated on the way his adam's apple bobs up and down as gulps his beer. He doesn't seem to notice– or maybe he just doesn't care. Instead he leans in towards you, eyes fixated on the crowd ahead of him, the hands reaching over tables and the soft slaps of cards being shuffled. “So, what do you think, Uno or Cards Against Humanity?” 

You click your tongue against the roof of your mouth, sucking in a gust of air between your teeth. “I don't know, as appealing as playing Cards Against Humanity with my coworkers and in turn finding out a little too much about their personal life is, I think Uno might just be our safest option.”

Daniel laughs at your sarcasm. Nodding as he slides out from the table, hand out for you to take. C’mon then, he hums as he encloses your fingers in the warm grip of his hands, tugging you between tables and passer-bys, plopping down at a table of five. You recognize one other person at the table, the dealer, who smiles at you as she deals you and Daniel in. It was meant to start as a friendly little game, with lighthearted laughter and maybe a bit of peaking over at the other’s cards. But between the third and fourth deal, people had begun to throw quid on the table, then all of a sudden you’re down twenty and Daniel was happily collecting the bills on his end. You scowl over at him, nudging his leg with the toe of your shoe. 

“You don’t need all this money.” 

“Not my fault you suck.” He puckers his lips, sends a kiss over to you in the space between you two. 

“Bite me,” You sneer, picking up your new set of seven cards, organizing them by color. 

You catch a whiff of his cologne as he leans in. You pull your hand close to your chest, pressing the cards flush against your being as he lines his mouth up to your ear to whisper, “Careful what you wish for.” 

Your cheeks flush, bright pink though no one at the table seems to catch it under the dim lighting of the pub. Another game, you’re sure you’ve got the upper hand this time around but then Daniel drops a skip… and then another… and then he stacks a draw two… twice. By the end of the game you had about half the deck of cards in your hands and Daniel counting about forty quid in his hands. You’re scowling again, and he laughs at your misfortune. 

You excuse yourself from the table, running up to the bar to get yourself another beer. Stacy– you think her name is Stacy anyway– slides next to you, picking up a bit of conversation. It’s small talk, surface level shit until she’s asking about the boy you had been stuck to all night. She teases you, refers to him as the boy, it makes you feel giddy. To one person in this room, Daniel was your little secret. And it felt nice. It felt good. But you shook your head, the blush taking over your face again as you took the beer that was handed to you, mumbling how he’s just a friend. But Stacy– or is it Sarah? She smiles and shrugs, taking her cocktail as she hops off her bar stool, red straw placed between her coco colored lips to take a sip before stepping back. 

“All I’m saying… friends don’t look at friends the way you two look at each other.” 

She leaves you at the bar with a sentence equivalent to fuel to a fire. It burns, oh it festers. Your mind reels over every moment, every second you’ve spent with Daniel, trying to figure out how he looked at you. 

Your eyes scan over the crowd, the mess of chatter tuned out as you look for a mop of curls which you spot towards the front of the bar. He’s laughing– he’s always laughing. You might’ve been meters away, but you could hear him, the joyful ha has over the multitude of conversation. And for a moment, like every cliche written and produced, the room stops. Suddenly the crowd disappears, the music is turned down, and it’s just you and Daniel. The lamp over the table beams, reflects over his golden skin as he deals the cards down on the table. His fingers are quick, counting quietly to himself as he goes around the table. And when he’s done, he sets the left over cards down in the middle of the table in a neat stack. Before he picks up his set, he reaches over to your seat, pulls the cards together neatly and pats it down before picking up his own. You watch as his slender fingers pick at the cards– that one goes at the end, oh and this one between these two. He picks and pulls, slots cards by cards til he’s satisfied with his line up. Then he squeezes the cards into one stack, setting down on his thigh below the table. 

His head turns, you see the soft swing of his curls as he looks around the bar. He looks and looks and oh, relief. Daniel’s shoulders drop when he catches sight of you, a smile so wide your cheeks ache for him. His hand goes up in the air, waving at you to return to your seat. Hurry! You aren’t sure if he actually said it, but you know his lips moved that way. He smiles, his eyes are warm and bright, this sultry kind of brown that you could distinguish from miles away. You miss it as he turns away to immerse himself in a conversation you didn’t care to know about. You smile, just enough so that your cheeks round a bit and your eyes squint in just the slightest. You smile in a way that a girl watches a boy she loves from across the way, watches as he melts into her life. And he melts so well, sits so comfortably without you as he awaits your return. He has his arm slung over your chair, nodding over at someone you could care less about. He laughs at jokes, makes some back, and– god you just couldn’t stop staring. You couldn’t stop watching him. Him, him, always him. 

You walk back over to the table, setting a hand on Daniel’s shoulder as you lean down to him. His hand comes up to rest over yours, head turning ever so slightly so that he can see you. Your heart is in overdrive, your body overheating. You try to ignore it. You try, try, try. 

“I’m gonna go get some air.”

“You okay?” His brows furrow with concern. You nod, and he doesn’t seem to relax. “Are you sure?” 

“Yes, Daniel. I’m fine. Just stuffy in here.” 

“Well, let me come with.” 

He goes to get up from his seat, but you push him back down. “No, no no I’ll be fine.” You smile– you think you do. “I’ll be back. Win this round so you can buy me a drink after.” 

He looks unconvinced, eyes scanning your face for a morsel of doubt, for a twitch of lip that would beg him to accompany you. But you keep your expression fair, squeeze his shoulder again, and he concedes. He nods, patting your hand again. “Okay okay, deal.” 

Your hand comes up to his cheek, and he leans into your touch as it slips away. He turns his head, watches you walk out the door while the game starts. You feel his eyes burning in a hole in the back of your skull and it only makes you walk quicker. 

The cool London air blows the door open, bites at your skin and fights against the warmth pooling with the booze. You wrap your arms around yourself, rubbing your palms against your arm, squeezing the flesh there. Your eyes fall shut, inhaling deeply as you try to center yourself, trying to get ahold of your heart, trying to get it to slow down. Tears were threatening you, choking you. 

You didn’t want to say bye. You don’t want all this to end, to have Daniel pluck himself out of your company and back to his normal routines. You don’t want to go back to the facetime calls, and debriefs over texts. No you want to smell the rain, you want the cheeky laughter and fighting over who gets the rest of the cereal. You want late night drives to Taco Bell, and early mornings to get coffee because you were too lazy to run your own. But most of all, you want Daniel. You want the good, the bad, all the highs and all the lows. You want every single moment between now and an indefinite future. 

And you felt crazy for wanting such a thing. 

You hear the door creak behind you, a bit of the conversation escaping with him before he shuts the door with a soft thud. 

“Hey, come back inside. You’re missing out on the game.” Daniel bumps his shoulder with yours, a smile so wide it drives fear into your chest. You look up at him, take all the strength left in you to smile– and you hope that you do it well. His smile, bright, excited, so reminiscent of the Daniel you bumped into some time ago. He’s tanned, hair curly, muscles bulky, he’s back to who he was before a string of bad luck wore him down. He was this new Daniel that you had fallen so head over heels for, and it hurt your heart not to say it.  

The words sit in your throat, run it dry and make it hard to breathe. You were getting all choked up with a secret you couldn’t bear to keep.

He bumps your shoulder again, “What? Are you scared to lose again?” 

God you were so afraid to lose. But maybe you had already lost more than you could ever admit to yourself. 

Daniel says your name. 

“I’m in love with you.” 

You had a dream about this moment. It happened in the rain, colorful poppies potted in a flowerbed by a house, and oh how the world smelled divine. You could still hear the laughter, still see the smile that graced his face. You dreamt about the way he would wrap himself around you, allow you to bury yourself in his warmth and the scent of fresh fallen rain. In every universe, you imagined the way the words would sound coming from his mouth. You imagined the simplicity, the good in the moment. 

But then you see his face run pale, lips parted without the words to back him up. You see how he scratches the back of his neck before it comes around to rub his stubble. And then his fingers are running through his hair. He takes a step back, and there’s this space between you that wasn’t there before. Your name rolls off his tongue, sounds so despondent it twists your heart. It sounds so…

“I-I-I-” You stammer like it would mend the situation, “I’m sorry but… I couldn’t keep it in. Couldn’t continue to pretend like my heart didn’t wanna beat out of my chest everytime I see you, so I just had to– I had to say it.”

You see his chest begin to rise with each breath he takes. It’s slow, but deep. His eyes are wide, they’re panicked, they look so fucking afraid. 

“Daniel I–” “What are you doing?” Your lips fall shut. What are you doing? You bite down on your bottom lip, palms pressed together as you rub them in front of you to distract from the tears that were already beginning to cloud your vision. Daniel lets out a breath, hands coming up to run through his hair– again. “Why… why would you say that?” His hands rub his beard, again. “Fuck, Poppy why would you say that?” 

The air is caught in your throat. The words on your tongue melt away, daydreams dissolve. You were left with your skin and a heart that continues to shatter because Daniel stares at you like you’ve done something wrong. And all you could, all you had the strength to do, is smile. You smile because that’s all you had left to give. A smile that made your lips quiver, cheeks tremble and wet with your sadness. You don’t know what else to do, so you smile. 

“I just needed you to know.” 

Daniel drops his face into his hands, shaking his head into his palms. You watch him, watch as he mumbles to himself. You watch in tears, your shattered heart at your feet as you wait for the change in tone, wait for a moment you’ll never live to see. He lifts his gaze back up to you, the panic gone and replaced this kind of pity that makes you wish you never said it in the first place. 

He says your name with a bit of remorse, and yet it still sounds beautiful. “I… I can’t. Poppy I’m sorry.” 

You let out a breath. It’s your turn to turn away, hands coming up to push your hair back as you tried to control the sobs that threatened to take over you. Another shaky breath, another drop of tears onto your cheeks. You couldn’t let him see you so broken, you can’t let him have that. No, you refused.

“Poppy–” “Daniel, please.” “Poppy you mean so much–” 

“Daniel,” You turn around, hand out to motion him to stop, “Please don’t. Please.” 

“You are the greatest friend–” He continues anyway, torturing you with the right thing to say– the most reasonable thing to say, “–I could ever ask for. You don’t know how much I appreciate that. How much I–” 

“I don’t want that Daniel I–” “–How much I appreciate you.” 

He reaches out for you. You should’ve pushed him away, you should’ve stepped back, but god you are so weak for him. So you bask in the warmth of his hand, the way he squeezes it like he was trying to stitch back that hole he left in your chest. You let yourself rest in the false sense of security for just a second. You stare at the point your skin touches, the way his skin contrasts yours, fingers holding onto yours so tightly. It’s warm. It’s good. 

It’s good for all of two seconds, and then you’re crying and pulling yourself from him again. You wipe your face with the back of your hand, shaking your head and smiling. Daniel says your name, desperate to get to you again. But you shake your head, take another step back. 

“You don’t know how much you mean to me.” His voice is a whisper, nearly overpowered by the gust of cold wind. “Poppy–”

“Daniel, it’s okay.” Your voice breaks because it’s not. But you pretend that it is to save face, to pretend that you can walk away from this moment with your head held high. 

He calls your name again, craning his neck so that he can meet your gaze, and you try to avoid it but he comes into view. His hand comes up, chin tucked in his index finger and thumb to lift your face. “But it's not. I can see it on your face.”

“But it has to be, right?”

You clamp your lips into a tight line, tugging your face out of his hold. It’s quiet, tense, and you’re so fucking miserable. For the first time, there’s a sense of dread. In the months you’ve grown to know Daniel, to fall in love with him, in the time that brought you to this moment– you now feel that dread. It sits heavy in your chest, squeezing your heart so tight you think it might pop. If someone had asked you all those months ago if you could picture walking away from Daniel, your answer would be a resounding no. You could never picture yourself doing it– and even if you could, you could always picture running straight back to him.

But now, now you’re forced to reckon with the reality that you have to walk away and never look back. That if you want to hold on to the very little dignity you have left, you should say your goodbyes and walk away. But where was the good in this goodbye? It was just a promise that this is the end, that the next time you see him would not be of your intention. You would have to accept that the only good in this farewell is that it’s permanent. 

So in February you walked away with your heart in your hands and a gaping hole in your chest shaped like Daniel. You walked yourself to the underground railway and sobbed because it was the only thing left for you to do. You clutched onto your chest because it hurt so fucking bad. 

Daniel collected his items from your apartment the next day while you cried in your bedroom. He knocked on your door, twisted the knob only to find that it’s locked. He said he’s sorry through the door, he said it over and over you had to pull the pillow over your head. 

I don’t deserve you Poppy, his voice is muffled but so fucking clear at the same time, I’m sorry Poppy. I… I’ll see you soon.

And then it was over. Daniel was gone– easily, tragically, and all at once. All the memories that mesh together melted into your sadness. It kept you in bed with the blinds drawn shut. Darkness and despair always paired well together. 

Your phone pings, the screen lights up and illuminates the bedroom. But you don’t have the heart to look, because you know who it is. You could see his contact photo, you can see the letters spell out his name. So instead you bury yourself deeper into the pillows and blankets, bury yourself deeper into your hopelessness. For just a moment, you wanted to forget that he existed, that he was every part of your life, that you ever poured your heart to him thinking for a second that he would feel the same way. 

Daniel 4:33 PM Please don’t forget about me

You’ll never forget him and everything he was to you. Never.

February blends into March. March into April. April to May, June, July. And suddenly it’s August again. 

You lay on the beach in Mykonos, nursing another strawberry margarita. You love  strawberry margaritas. But this time around, you stay away from the bustling movements of the bar, instead choosing to lounge by the pool in hopes to catch a tan. After all, what was summer for? 

You try to ignore the obvious, what the Mykonos was to you a year prior. The memories it gave the person it brought to you. The laughter. The ease. The smell of fresh fallen rain. All the good in Daniel clung onto you and you clung right back. A year ago you met someone who changed your worldview, caught a glimpse of your soul, before shattering your being. He was the best and worst thing that could’ve possibly happened to you. 

August… August and all the months that followed slipped away in a moment in time. It fell to the back of your mind, laid to rest so that you’d find a bit of peace. You hope Daniel is well, wherever he is in the world. You hope that he hasn’t forgotten about you, like how you haven’t forgotten him. 

Another sip of your strawberry margarita, drinking down the remnants of slush in the glass before setting it down and laying it back. And the sun disappeared, a shadow took its place. But you were warm, you were comforted, you felt at peace. You felt good. So you smile, hand coming up to block the bits of sunlight that peek behind him. You catch a glimpse of messy curls and a smile so wide you’re sure it hurts. 

“Can I buy you a drink?”

d rambles. . . hey girl hey. i haven't put out a fic in fucking ages, sorry bout that. but yay, new blog, new fic!! this turned into a MONSTER, but i think im happy with how it all came together. was the ending a little rushed? maybe. but in my defense, this whole fic turned out soooo much longer than i initially planned. anyways. i hope you liked this one & as always, feedback is always always appreciated.

#daniel ricciardo #daniel ricciardo x reader #daniel ricciardo x you #daniel ricciardo imagine #daniel ricciardo one shot #f1 one shot #f1 imagine #daniel ricciardo angst

[anadiasmount]

love - jude bellingham x reader.

— small blurb (or scenario from my head) that i thought of to write this! 🤍😌

the wedding was wonderful. filled with many laughters and tears, everyone rejoicing, drinking, talking, or dancing. like how jude and you are, your bodies cling together as they swayed side to side. the sea breeze and smell reminding you of the beautiful paradise you got to travel to with your boyfriend.

when you met jude for the first time he had no clue how to dance, yet he’s still learning but right now you didn’t care, all you could feel was the warmth and safety in his embrace. his hands rested just above your bum, while yours were wrapped around his shoulders.

his head was rested gently on your temple, yours the same, just whispers of how happy the two of you were and stuff you wanted to do here on the island. but when it did get quiet, all you could hear was the commotion of people and your heart beginning to race faster. “you know… today has me thinking of something…”

your head pulled back to face him, his eyes filled with love and pure adoration as he looked into you. “yeah? and what is that?” you ask, your hand coming up to the nape of his neck to draw small shapes. “how badly i want this with you. a wedding. you and me married one day…” jude reveals, his face going from soft to serious in matter of seconds.

you intake a breath of air, the room becoming hot all of the sudden at his confession. one of his hand comes to your face where he tucked back a piece of hair behind your ear, being careful with your earrings, then holding your cheek as he continued to speak. “i love you, y/n… so much. i want to do everything with you…”

as your bodies continued to sway and danced to the music, you stayed put and came to a halt, tippy toeing to hug him tighter. you’d been together for a few months but never said the three words. there was times when you’d be on the phone, saying goodbye, when watching movies, or when you woke up from your sleep you almost said the words. when he visited your parents for the first time and the two of you were left alone by the bonfire.

love. the word love continued to replay in your head as you kissed his neck, jaw, cheek, his nose and then finally his plump lips. the two of you smiled into the kiss, teeth clashing as you kissed him a bit harder before pulling away. you held his face with both hands as his returned back to their place on your hips.

“i love you jude. i always have and always will.”

“i was so scared you’d say it, because i wanted to say it first,” he says making you giggle as you lean in to peck his lips once more. “i’m just so grateful to have found someone like you. you’re special and truly one of a kind, and i can’t help but feel to lucky to have a strong beautiful woman who isn’t afraid to follow me while i chase my dreams…”

“if anything im the lucky one… jude you’re my best friend, and if one thing is for sure, is that i’ll never stop following you as long as your happy and content,” you say, your bodies going side to side as you return to dance.

“but jude… if you want to get married one day, we have to work on your dance skills pretty boy,” you tease, jude gasping acting offended. “ma’am i’ll have you know my dancing skills are wonderful and unique,” jude defends himself with a joking smile plastered on his face.

“whatever you say…” you laughed, your forehead resting together as you continued to sway. it didn’t feel real, but when you felt him kiss your forehead and bridge of your nose you knew it wasn’t a dream or fairytale.

one day it’d be a different place and time. the dream of the both of you being married one day would become true. filled with many tears and laughter, but most importantly, love.

#jude bellingham #jude bellingham x reader #jude bellingham imagine #jude bellingham one shot #jude bellingham blurb #jude bellingham fic #jude bellingham x you #jude bellingham x y/n #jude bellingham imagines #jude bellingham fluff #football x reader #footballer #football fanfic

[euphoricfilter]

hearts for dinner ~ drabble 1:

pairing: yandere! taehyung x demon! reader

genre: fluff || smut || non-idol au || established relationship || yandere au

summary: the lust of kim taehyung

tags/ warnings: he films her without her knowledge. smut in the forms of: phone sex/masturbation, cumming on thighs, fingering, mentioned oral, sort of cum play, first kisses!!

notes: takes place before the previous part :D

<- previous || where you can read my other stuff!!

.　 . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆.

the first time taehyung had invited you over to his house, it took every single cell of willpower to not lock the door and demand you move in with him that very second.

it had only been a couple of months since he’d asked you on your first date, seconds after meeting you enough for him to be entirely enamoured by your mere existence.

the pretty little dove he wanted to cage and keep to be cherished by his all consuming love for the rest of time.

there was only so many nights he could watch you through the camera he’d planted in one of the flower pots he’d given you before he was desperate to feel your flesh against his.

waiting for you to be tucked under the plethora of blankets on the bed before he’s snatching his phone off the desk, calling you.

he needed to be the last thought before you fell asleep, treading through your dreams, following you into the real world. he needed your mind as full of him, as his was of yours. needed you to understand the tight squeeze of his fragile heart every time he thought of you.

he needed your reason for life to be him, to want to breathe his air, touch him. he wanted the spiral of love, pulling the both of you so far into the black hole of raw desire to be the only thing that surrounds the both of you, as he moulds your very own paradise.

even on the nights you’d be sleepy as he calls, he can see the faint outline of a smile, barely there on your lips when you hear his voice.

and even on those nights it wouldn’t be hard to rile you up, smooth timbre of his voice ever so sweet as he tells you how pretty you are. how as he closed his eyes he could see the outline of your body, how much he wanted to mark you as his for the world to see.

teasing as you go quiet, hand palming his cock as he asks if you’re wet. if you’d be a good girl and press a finger through your folds, press a thumb over your clit.

he’d watch on the screen of the laptop, mound under the blanket where you’d slipped your hand into your panties.

he’d have to stave off his orgasm, always such a good thing for him. some nights you’d get a little hot, covers slipping onto the floor, and tae wouldn’t be able to help the ropes of cum that paint your face on the laptop screen at the little peek of your pretty little pussy, the perfect treasure taunting him.

you’d always been so shy, so to have you wriggling beneath the sheets as he tells you how to pleasure yourself made his heart soar, cock throbbing with the incessant want to cum between your walls, the rawest form of claim.

the night of your first kiss— that wonderful day you’d finally come over to his place, will forever be ingrained in his mind. how red your cheeks had been, ever so flustered. fingers digging into the fabric of his shirt as you blurt out your admission of never having kissed anyone before.

so unsure of yourself he was convinced he wouldn’t last the night with you sat in his bed, a vulnerable little thing.

“it’s okay, pretty” his thumb had brushed down your cheek, gentle reassurance. caramel sweet words soothing the sheer panic you’d felt.

there had been a quiver in your fingers as he leaned forward, eyes squeezed tight as his lips brushed over yours. the briefest little kiss, teasing you.

you’d chased after him, desperate for more. pressing a soft peck to his lips.

he hadn’t known you’d get so excited, hand shoved between your thighs as you try to relieve some of the growing arousal.

“oh sweet thing” he’d crooned, hands holding both your cheeks as he’d kissed you, tongue pressing into your mouth.

he remembers how you’d rubbed your poor little cunt on his thigh, how you’d admitted no one’s ever touched you before.

you’d watched as he’d tugged your panties down, showing you how to play with yourself. his fingers spreading your folds, thumb slipping into you.

the first time you moaned his name, he came over your thighs, slapping the head over your cunt to watch his seed mix with your arousal pushing it into you afterwards, making you push it all back out only to make you swallow it after.

it didn’t take much to convince you to stay over his house after that, tucked away sleeping in his bed with his head between your thighs, or your hand wrapped around his cock.

because taehyung knew you were perfect, your own version of love slowly forming into the raw sort of need that he had for you. your souls slowly becoming one, with every moment you spent together. because you even met in your dreams.

your life, be it awake or in the world of dreams, taehyung had taught you his way how to love.

#bts fanfic #bts fluff #bts smut #bts #bts x reader #taehyung #kim taehyung #taehyung fic #bts fic #taehyung x reader #taehyung smut #taehyung imagine #bts imagines #taehyung scenarios #taehyung x you #kim taehyung imagine #kim taehyung x reader #kim taehyung fluff #bts non idol au

[luselih]

Hiya! I wanna know if you'd write a scenario/drabble about the reader being the "emotional support demon" for the upper moons. Like they all collectively allow the reader to show some sort of affection towards them. (Preferably SFW pls)

ask/summary: demon!reader is emotional support demon for all 6 uppermoons!

content warnings | i tried to made it sweet but realistic, mentioned killing, possessiveness and obsessiveness (kinda yandare if you squint) , 5 love languages, comfort/fluff a bit too i guess? contains later manga stuff so manga spoilers!…

a/n - #1 i made this with mix of everything, i think it can be seen as platonic/non-romantical in most of settings (i think?)

#2 also reader is initially chubby hinted/written in mind so it’s up in text somewhere but i think i didn’t emphasized it too much so i guess anyone could read! Gender is not mentioned much too, maybe just some feminine parts couple of times.

#3 i so sorry for being inactive, i am graduating high school in 2 months so i gotta get grades and everything also i already wrote this but tumblr deleted it so i gotta do it again 💔

It was definitely very...very surprising and confusing for other lesser demons to see such... non scary scenes in front of them, especially one who were lowermoons and see them on more “regular" basis than others, who was that demon?

You were there practically chilling amongst uppermoons, one whi could kill any human or demon alive being so... tolerant with you? No one even remembers how did you even spawn in Infinity Castle at one of meetings they had with Muzan, yet everyone seemed to sooner or later get comfortable with you around, your presence giving each individual some kind of comfort to them...

Kokushibo only likes to spend some quality time with you after it took him a long time to get comfortable and used to you, now reading books or playing hanafuda together. He liked your presence when he got time to spend without training or killing people. It reminded him of his past self and life, his wife and two kids he left to chase his dream, it brings a sense of domestic warmth and comfort in his lonely life for the second time in his life after he willingly lost it. He even consider having you all to himself, what can other demons do about it? absolutely nothing.

Douma likes to receive physical affection and acts of service from you. He loves when you put your head on his chest, his arms wrapping around your waist and pulling you in his lap as low beings (humans) or different called his followers in Eternal Paradise Faith as you two listens to them and gives them advices. He simply cannot choose between having you close to him or when you go out and easily collect new followers that are especially young human women that he can eat sooner or later, he simply adores you <3

Akaza crave quality time and words of affirmation from you, or better said someone. He is living for a second time to avenge his death fiancée, but as any other being he grows to be closer to you. He can only pray that Koyuki isn’t jealous or mad at him as you praise him while watching moon together , your beautiful smile shining underneath moonlight as he caught a glimpse of her in you :(

Hantengu needs words of affirmation to survive due his constant suffering from his past self, all kills, lies and evil is laying heavily on his soul so he stoped crying as much as before. (i don’t like him so this is bad, sorry not sorry 🤷‍♀️)

Gyokko prefers to receive acts of service and gift giving as a form of affection from you, since he lives in vases he started liking you when you gifted him a handmade vase. He liked it very much that he almost considered living in that one instead of this he was using that was given by Douma. He absolutely loved when you cleaned all of his vases once, even organized them in order by shape, size, pattern and color :)

Daki + Gyutaro needs all 5 love languages, so count on words of affirmation, acts of service, receiving gifts, quality time, and physical touch. They were kids/very young when they died so they considered you as a sibling/guardian/prerent in some way. Letting you tend their needs and expectations, they also wants you all to themselves sooner or later :3

#bambi’s ✍️ #demon slayer #demon slayer x reader #demon slayer x y/n #demon slayer x you #kimetsu no yaiba #kimetsu no yaiba x reader #kimetsu no yaiba x you #kimetsu no yaiba x y/n #kokushibo x reader #douma x reader #akaza x reader #hantengu x reader #gyokko x reader #daki x reader #gyutaro x reader

[fitzs-trained-monkey]

Blind Boy 🥀

(An Ominis Gaunt friends-to-lovers playlist)

A/N: Please listen in order. There's a method to my madness.

Ominis Gaunt fell in love slowly...

It began, he thinks, when he started hanging out with her. Without Sebastian that is.

Young folks - Peter Biorn and John

Lake Shore Drive - Skip Haynes

She makes him rather happy. It's odd...

Dog Days are Over - Florence + the Machine

Sunshine Lollypops and Rainbows - Lesley Gore

She understands him like no one else. And even if she doesn't, she never pretends to. Just listens.

Wow, I'm Not Crazy - AJR

He really likes his time spent with her. He thinks about her when she's not around. She occupies his thoughts rather a lot. Her time feels like a currency and he fears running out. He's never had to be afraid of any sort of lack before.

putting a spin on Ophelia - Egg

What is this warm feeling? A dream - a wish, certainly. His parents would hurt him if they found out... Besides, he's just the blind boy. Who's he kidding?

One Last Wish - Casper

If I Could Ride A Bike - Park Bird, Chevy

Creep - Radiohead

It's impossible... but what's the point of it all if he doesn't at least try? It could be so beautiful. He doesn't have to be brave about it.

Do Not Let Your Spirit Wane - Gang of Youths

Do I Wanna Know? - Arctic Monkeys

He starts to try.

Passing Papers - Egg

Chasing Cars - Snow Patrol

Are You Bored Yet - Wallows

Please Notice - Christian Leave

Feelings Are Fatal - Mxmtoon

These feelings are deeper than he thought. He can't help but indulge them.

Can't Help Falling in Love - Elvis

Amazing - Rex Orange Country

Golden Hour - JVKE

This Side of Paradise - Coyote Theory

Can I Call You Tonight? - Dayglow

I Couldn't Be More In Love - The 1975

It's so wonderful. It's beyond good. And she's always so kind to him. So perfect.

Infinitely Ordinary - The Wrecks

Remember When - Wallows

Ratisim - The Suicide Squad

One night in the Undercroft, he plucks up a little courage. And then... then he asks that girl to dance.

Not About Angels - Birdy

Once Upon A December - Anastasia

The Princess Diaries Waltz

And oh... oh he's fallen so far. He's hopeless.

Thinking Out Loud - Ed Sheeran

Line Without A Hook - Rick Montgomery

First Kiss.

Like Real People Do - Hozier

And things just get better from there...

I Hear A Symphony - Cody Fry

Say You Won't Let Go - James Arthur

I Feel Good About This - The Mowgli's

Darling - Christian Leave

Love - Lana Del Rey

the world could end with you - Llunar

After graduation, he proposes. The ring doesn't come from a distant ancestor - it's not plucked off his family tree. It's just for her. For that lovely muggle-born girl and nobody else.

Until I Found You - Steven Sanchez

His first night with her is better than he ever could have dreamed.

Saturn - Sleeping At Last

He elopes with her two months later. And married life with her is perfect. Utterly and completely perfect. Away from his family and his high-society upbringing... it's lazy and soft and simple.

Banana Pancakes - Jack Johnson

Waltz for Sweatpants - Cody Fry

Would That I - Hozier

You Are Enough - Sleeping At Last

Photograph - Cody Fry

Love theme:

Hearing - Sleeping At Last

Happy Valentine's Day 💘

#I know its a little late but I spent hours on this #its so sappy #but young love guys #my name is cas and i write stuff #fanfic #hogwarts legacy #ominis gaunt #sebastian sallow #hogwarts legacy sebastian #fluffy fluff #hogwarts legacy ominis #ominis x mc #ominis x reader #ominis gaunt x reader #ominis gaunt x you #sebastian sallow x reader #friends to lovers #hogwarts school of witchcraft and wizardry #hogwarts legacy fanfiction #hogwarts legacy x reader #soft ominis #hes just a little guy #valentine's post #Hogwarts Valentine's #cas says stuff

[atlaswav]

ADDICTED TO THE RUSH ♢

INFO: 3k words, aiku oliver x fem! reader SYNOPSIS: strange things, a man did, when his knowledge of women was suddenly upturned by your very existence — the anomaly to his capricious heart, the addictive rush he'd been yearning for. WARNINGS: making out 16+ (shame.), hard drugs, hallucinogens, please don't do drugs kids, ESPECIALLY NOT FROM RANDOM STRANGERS LIKE OLIVER THIS BITCHASS, angst?? with happy ending. please be drug safe, not like this guy AUTHOR'S NOTE: not proof read and this is nothing except shame and delusion i'm ashamed and also simultaneously proud but i'll probably look back on this later and barf. listen to waiting for love by openside the title is inspired by that song. ++ if this is romanticising drugs in any way pls lmk idk what came over me. also likes and reblogs are really appreciated i'll give you a cookie 🫂

Contrary to what many would think, Oliver Aiku didn’t exactly consider himself one for parties. If anything, the thrumming bass that vibrated through the crowd, the alcohol stagnant in the air and the humidity of sweating bodies was an immediate line in the sand. He did have a reputation to keep, however, so what was one girl from the next when his name became a mantra on their lips?

Oliver wasn’t one for drinking, drugs or anything of the sort, either. Despite what his teammates may think, he would never have taken anything beyond a celebratory drink. Even though he’d been offered far worse on multiple occasions.

The professional soccer player couldn’t possibly risk any harm to his health, could he?

But he supposed, if he were to take the strangely glimmering, iridescent pill that was offered to him at the subway station in the dead of night, it’d be catastrophic. Strange things, a man did, when his heart was confused, brimming with reckless abandon. 

What was another wound to his soul than what already was?

He’d ingest it against the voice of reason, and his head would start to spin after a few moments. Were there two of those men standing in front of him? The lights would begin to flicker in his vision, and the ground would rise up to meet his face unceremoniously, while he dreamed of a faraway paradise. A paradise filled with gaudy colours, rippling images, and infinite traces of you. 

You, you you – your narcotic smell everywhere, your hypnotic laughter around each corner and bend, the hue of your irises flashing in the peripherals of his vision. He’d turn, aching to catch your evasive gaze, but you weren’t there. 

Slipping through his fingers like water, fading into the effervescent shoreline. Trying to bottle sunlight – preserve seafoam. 

He supposed that’s what loving you was like – would be like – not that he would know.  It was an addiction in its own sense; chasing something that wasn’t there, yet yearned to hold. 

He supposed that if he ingested that pill, and if all these things happened to him, then loving you was a drug. 

He got unbelievably high from your presence, the rapid beating of his heart, your quiet smiles, shared furtive glances, secret whispers, your feather light touch skimming across his skin, your voice’s melodic cadences. 

He’d give up anything to try again. To turn time on its head, watch the sand fall inversely through the hourglass and give rise to the words that were lodged in his throat. To stand his ground and not run away like the coward he became when it came to you. But of course, Oliver Aiku was not one for such things either. 

And he hated himself for it. 

The lights above shone a myriad of colours into his bleary gaze, the ground beneath him rumbling. What was that screeching noise? 

It hurt his ears. He wanted to curl into a ball to escape it, but his limbs betrayed him.

His annoyance only spiked as people started to pour onto the platform, the ground shaking with footsteps and indistinct voices. 

He told himself that he should move, but the iridescent lights above him were swirling into shapes, and he wanted to watch the bubbles float towards him, shining incandescently. 

Wait. Bubbles? 

“Oliver? Oh my god.”

He stirred, temples throbbing. Your voice started to haunt him too, it seemed. Lilting, soothing, lovely. He wished you’d speak again. He needed you to say his name again. It sounded like honey when it fell from your lips. 

“Oh my god, Oliver, wake up.”

He mumbled something, faintly aware of a face in front of him. Your face. Beautiful, but marked with worry. He willed himself to reach out, to hold your cheek, to brush your hair away from your face, but he couldn’t.

“He’s off. On a trip to another universe. What did that guy give him?” another voice, this one less lovely. A dissonant cadence that had him remembering training. He hated training. Only because his team mates wouldn’t stop pestering him about you, once they’d finally found out about you.

“Hang in there, Oliver. We’ll get you home.” 

Home? To him, home was wherever you were. He was entirely content to fall asleep in your arms, on the grimy platform floor. 

Arms tried to lift him, but the six foot man was liquid in their arms. 

“C’mon, can you move?” his teammate asked. “What did that guy even give you?”

He grumbled something. Tried to get his legs to move. Stumbled backwards, hitting his back on a wall. 

“He said “a ticket to heaven for a night”, whatever that means.” You supply.

“That’s not reassuring.”

“Sendo, let’s just carry him. It isn’t too far anyway.” you huffed, looping one of his arms around you. He tried to cling to you with both arms, but his limbs flailed uselessly by his sides. 

“Alright, fine. You’re buying me a drink after this, Aiku.” His teammate’s voice irked him, even in this state of bliss. 

The walk back to his apartment took far longer than it should’ve. It was quiet, occasionally broken by the heaving of breaths, clouding in the winter air. Wisps of colour followed them out of the subway station. Was that a whale swimming towards them? No, that was just the light. The stupid, colourful light. 

He creaked open his eyes, and the world started to swirl in his vision. Were they standing at his elevator? Is that why the wind had stopped blowing into his face? He leaned into your warmth, cheeks red from the cold. 

“You can go now, I got him from here.” 

“You sure?” His balance slips as Sendo removes himself from Oliver’s grip. 

“Yeah. ‘Night, Sendo.” 

“Yeah, yeah, message me if something happens. Goodnight.”

You stand there in silence with him, waiting for the elevator to arrive. His face presses into the crook of your neck, stubble grazing your skin as he mumbles something. 

“Oliver, what did you do?” you sigh. 

He frowns. 

“You okay?”

He huffs. 

“Silent treatment, or high out of your mind?”

He doesn’t respond. Spots start to appear all over the place. Spinning, spinning, spinning. Waves of dizziness wash over him, and his grip on your arm tightens. 

“Come on, let’s get you to bed.” you haul him into the elevator, leaning against the wall as the ascent starts. Oliver wobbles dangerously, threatening to collapse as his knees start to give out. 

“Why did you do this?” you mutter. “Is it because of what I said?”

His eyes snap open. As close to snapping open as his traitorous body would allow in this state of his. Your eyes meet his, and he feels himself wanting to drown in your gaze forever. His mind was just as traitorous as his body.

No, he wants to say. It could never be your fault. 

But he doesn’t. His tongue is lead in his mouth, so he just looks at you in a stupor before you sigh and shake your head. 

“You don’t have to reciprocate anything. We can still be friends.” 

Your confession only hours before had felt like a weight finally lifted from your chest, quickly replaced by another. Heavier, more suffocating. When he’d run from you, it took everything within you to not run after him and beg. 

He hated anything remotely permanent, he’d once confided to you. He found an appreciation for the fleeting moments of affection of one night stands and miscellaneous, faceless, nameless women – no strings attached, tying him down. Heaven forbid you become the object of his hatred, along with the object of his – disgust? You couldn’t tell, with Oliver. There was never any telling what he’d do. 

You drew the keys from his pocket, unlocking his front door as he stumbled forward, nearly face planting on the floors. 

“Come on, you big baby.” 

“...Stars.” 

“What?”

“Stars on the… ceiling.” me mumbled, eyes half closed.

Worry rushed through you as you seated him on the couch. Just how strong was the drug he took?

“What did you take?” you grasp his shoulders, shaking him lightly. He mumbles something close to ‘Don’t worry’. If anything, you begin to worry more as his head falls to one side. 

“Oliver.” Your voice is a song in his ears, drawing up images of the waves at sunrise, bleeding orange, pink and purple into the deep blue of the water. 

“Oliver, stay with me.”

“‘M fine.” he manages. “Dizzy.” 

“Let me get you some water.” your presence – the warmth of your touch – disappears, and his eyes open in alarm. 

He hears the sound of water being poured, then soft footsteps shuffling around. His apartment is dark, the only light drifting in from the balcony, illuminating the room with a pale glow. 

“Here, drink.” you lift the glass to his lips, and he begrudgingly takes a couple of sips. Some water spills from the corner of his lips, down his neck. His Adam's apple bobs. His trembling hand comes up weakly to lower the glass, but he doesn’t release his grip as he meets your eyes. Pupils blown out, hardly on this plane of existence. 

“I love you.”

You nearly drop the glass. 

“You’re high. Say that to me when you’re sober.” you pry free from his grip, setting the glass onto the low coffee table in front of you. “Want to go to bed?”

He shakes his head, the movement apparently as much as he can muster. “Here.”

“Huh?”

“Here. With you.” he mumbles. 

“What?”

Then you take a seat next to him, and his head falls onto your shoulder. His body seems to relax in your presence, wholly at peace. 

You sigh. If “heaven for one night” meant anything, he’d be fine by morning, but you debated calling an ambulance anyway. Should you call the ambulance? Was that crook at the subway trustworthy? You glance at the peacefully sleeping man beside you, chest evenly rising and falling. He seemed fine, but he had taken drugs from a stranger.  

You reach for your phone just as he grumbles, flopping his entire upper body onto your lap. 

Okay, no, then.

Oliver’s soft snoring is almost endearing as he nuzzles his face into your thighs. You heave a sigh, running a hand through his neon green edged hair. He seemed to lean into the touch. No, it was your imagination. You lean back against the leather sofa and close your eyes, hoping for the night to pass sooner. Hoping that he’d sober up by morning, and spare you a trip to the emergency room. 

Hoping to hear those three words in the lustre of clarity. 

—

His dreams were filled with phantoms; phantom hands, faces, touches. Phantom words spoken into the air, disappearing in smoke, and only spurring his guilt. Yet as he woke from his stupor, the world smelled like you. Coaxing him back to the dreamscape. Exhaustion hit him like a tsunami, meeting him with a thundering headache. 

His vision didn’t fare any better as he opened his eyes, the world a mess of swirls and blurring patterns. He groaned and flipped over, only to realise where he was. 

The disorientation of sleep melted away as he finally came to his senses. Sweat, thinly beaded across his skin, his clothes clinging to his body. He lay curled up on the couch, head nuzzled into the pillows – warm, soft –

“Oliver? You awake?” 

He snaps to attention, sitting up the moment he hears your voice.

The plight of his dreams, the palliative cadences that he wished he could despair in. 

His head throbbed from the blood rushing to his head, and he swore quietly, swaying as he adjusted. 

“How are you feeling? Are you alright?” your eyes are wide with concern, and something in his heart tugs. 

The night before is an empty slot in his reel of memory, a smudge of bright, neon lights and dancing shapes as he attempts to recall exactly what happened. How he ended up sleeping on your lap, how you’d ended up at his apartment. Did you sleep over? It looks like you didn’t sleep at all, with the dark circles under your red rimmed eyes. 

You abruptly get off the couch, heading into his kitchen. He hears the pouring of water, then you return, gingerly handing him the glass. He takes it, confusion slowly turning to realisation as he remembers. 

And the memory of his cowardliness, his recklessness, his awful string of decisions that led him to seeing stars rushes through him like ice cold water. 

“You okay?” you ask, voice soft. Treading on eggshells. 

He nods, downing the glass of water. 

Quiet, strung on a humming wire, envelops you as he attempts to find the words that kept escaping him. The words that he swore he’d never speak, even though you were right in front of him, still worried. Despite it all. You’d stayed, despite everything. 

Would he have been a coward for pushing you away? Sparing you from the inevitable heartbreak that he’d dole out like his meaningless plethora of apologies, incapable of anything prolonged more than one night?

“Oliver,” his gaze snaps to you. His name was like ambrosia on your lips. He wanted to hear it spoken again and again, a prayer, a worship, a plea. 

“Did we…” he trails off, sheepish. Oliver Aiku, bashful of his escapades. 

Your cheeks redden slightly as you shake your head, unwilling to meet his eyes. 

Silence, the capricious thing. Teetering on the edge of ruin, speared into disrepair with words that could shatter or mend your heart. Your heart, aching to be given away. Aching for the one that you couldn’t have. 

Your name echoes through his empty house. The early morning sunlight peers through the windows, casting warm light on your face. Rejuvenating, almost divine. 

“I’m sorry.” 

Your heart drops. 

“I don’t know how to–” he rubs his face with his hand, heterochromic eyes gazing at some point beyond. “I’ve never had a way with words.”

“You don’t have to say anything.” your bitter smile breaks his heart. Digs the blade in and twists, spilling burning acid into his veins. 

He can feel his world crumbling around him as you stand, turning around. Heading for the door, for the threshold beyond that would mean you were finally gone. Finally out of his life, finally gone from the dreams that you haunted, from the touch that he craved. 

He should be glad, but instead, like an addicted man, he reaches out, grabbing your arm. 

“Wait,” 

You turn to face him. Hope glimmers in your eyes and he can only feel guilty. His love wasn’t something that he could offer, his heart wasn’t one that could stay with yours for as long as he would wish, and it was another thing that he despised himself for. 

He despised himself for not being able to love you the way you should be. 

If only he could put it into words. 

“You don’t need to comfort me.” 

He sighs. “I’m not trying to comfort you, I just…”

You frown, stepping closer. “Then what, Oliver?”

If only you knew the effect you had. “I don’t have a way with words,” he starts. “But I’ve always believed that actions can speak louder.”

“What are you–”

Your words drown in his mouth as he pulls your mouth down to meet his. He drowns your gasp of shock, offers reassurance with the measured brush of his tongue on your lips. If Oliver had anything to show from his reputation as a womaniser, it was knowing how to treat a woman. 

The kiss burns with a fervour that you can only describe as hunger. He kisses like he’s been starved, addicted to your taste, your touch, shivering as your hands wander into his hair. His breath catches in his throat as your nails scrape his scalp, muffling a groan as you bite his lip. 

You pull away all too quickly for his liking. His starvation is in his eyes. Your breaths are quick, ragged, and he tries to kiss you again, but you press your index finger to his lips. 

“Are you still high?” you ask, voice carrying that hint of joy that he wanted to illuminate. 

“No.”

“Are you lying to me?” 

A smile breaks out on your face as he sighs heavily, catching your wrist in his hand. “I might be, but I can think straight.”

A laugh from you, and he thinks he’s doomed. Fated to be wrapped around your finger for the remainder of his sorry life, a jester for your amusement. How quickly the tables have turned on him. 

“We’ll see, Aiku.” you press a kiss to his forehead, smile luminescent in the dawn sun. Despite the sleepless night, watching over him in his state of oblivion, you were radiant. The object of  his secret desires, the hubris to his mercurial heart. 

“Wait, what?” As you turn to leave, he scrambles up from the couch, but his limbs won’t let him catch you. “Where are you going?”

“Home.” you cast him a coy smile. “If your actions speak true, come find me when you’re sober.”

Then the door opens and closes, before he can retort. Gone with the wind, scattered like seafoam on the shores of golden sand. 

He falls back onto the couch with a huff, the ceiling still swimming slightly in his vision. Never again, he’d take any drug from any sketchy man in a subway station. He didn’t need drugs, alcohol or women anymore, he could discard his reputation completely. He didn’t need such things anymore – not when he had you. 

You, you you, with your haunting presence, eluding his grasp like sunlight in a jar. He’d normally relent, turning to the next woman fawning over him, sweep her off her feet with his aloofness and casanova grin. 

But now he had you, and the chase was a thrill that no drug could replicate. 

You were his dopamine, he was hopelessly addicted. 

written by @atlaswav, published 4th of February, 2024

#blue lock #bllk #blue lock x reader #oliver aiku #aiku oliver #aiku x reader #oliver x reader #oliver aiku x reader #oliver aiku x you #blue lock anime #blue lock manga #blue lock oliver #i need sleep desperately #angst with a happy ending #tw drugs #be drug safe PLEASE #its not my fault if you decide to take drugs from a random stranger in a train station okay this is me warning you #if i romanticised drugs im so sorry i don't know what i'm doing #sigh #i hate this #i hate everything i write to be fair #yolo 😍😔 #MEOW #goodnight america #☁️. writing

[pinkhairswagtourney]

please give a warm welcome to the 128 contestants of the pink hair swag tourney, part three !!

we have 57 new contenders and 71 returning competitors vying for the crown !! starting on 06/21/2023, we'll start voting to determine which of these pink haired characters is the swaggiest of all time !!

ROUND ONE MATCHUPS

PART ONE - 06/21 Iris Lovefeather - Tales of the Rays VS Lightning Farron - Final Fantasy Molli Pop - Candies n’ Curses VS Lily Tabacchi - Lily’s Well Yuyuko Saigyouji - Touhou Project VS Kasen Ibaraki - Touhou Project Madoka Kaname - Madoka Magica VS Aya Maruyama - Bang Dream! Vivian - Paper Mario: The Thousand Year Door VS Anne Faulkner - Paradox Live Reona West - Prism Paradise VS Mirai Momoyama - Sparkling Prism Channel Crona - Soul Eater VS Chibiusa - Sailor Moon Satsuki Momoi - Kuroko no Basket VS Alice Asmodeus - Mairimashita! Iruma-kun

PART TWO - 06/22 Meninas McAllon - Bleach VS Neon Nostrade - Hunter x Hunter (1999) Shima Renzou - Blue Exorcist VS Szayelaporro Granz - Bleach Ln'eta - Sucker for Love: First Date VS Miyako Shikamori - Shikamori’s Not Just a Cutie Hot Pants - Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure VS Yasuho Hirose - Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure Sheena Murphy - Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles VS Scary Girl - Total Drama Cleo - Dragalia Lost VS Amy Pile - Grand Chase Mashiro Nijigaoka - Hirogaru Sky! Pretty Cure VS Nodoka Hanadera - Healin’ Good Pretty Cure Rina Tennoji - Love Live VS Mei Hatsume - My Hero Academia

PART THREE - 06/23 Mizuki Akiyama - Project Sekai VS Utena Tenjou - Revolutionary Girl UtenaSakura Miku - Vocaloid VS Goku Black - Dragon BallRose Quartz - Steven Universe VS Bonnibel Bubblegum - Adventure TimeLilim - Puyo Puyo VS Harpy - Puyo PuyoUlala - Space Channel 5 VS Jerrica Benton - Jem and the HologramsKohaku Oukawa - Ensemble Stars VS Ramuda Amemura - Hypnosis Mic Sara - Tales of Link VS Meido - Heaven’s Design TeamNatsu Dragneel - Fairy Tail VS Marluxia - Kingdom Hearts

PART FOUR - 06/24 Popuri - Harvest Moon VS Lyla - Harvest Moon Ramsey Murdoch - Epithet Erased VS Yoomtah Zing - Epithet Erased Trixie Roughhouse - Epithet Erased VS Giovanni Potage - Epithet Erased  Estellise Sidos Heurassein - Tales of Vesperia VS Sophia - Stardew Valley Expanded Clover Field - Zero Escape VS Zizel - Witch’s Heart Nikki - Love Nikki VS Zero Two - Darling in the Franxx Nana Hiiragi - Munou na Nana VS Amu Hinamori - Shugo Chara! Maggie Pesky - The Buzz on Maggie VS Jinmay - Super Robot Monkey Team Hyperforce Go!

PART FIVE - 06/25 Reo Maruyama - Paradox Live VS Kazuichi Souda - Danganronpa Seraphine - League of Legends VS Violet - Arcane Jewelry Bonney - One Piece VS Koby - One Piece Perona - One Piece VS Shirahoshi - One Piece Minato Aqua - Hololive VS Himemori Luna - Hololive Mina Ashido - My Hero Academia VS Anya Forger - Spy x Family Kaoru Sakurayashiki - Sk8 the Infinity VS Nadeshiko Kagamihara - Yuru Camp Molly - Bubble Guppies VS Toadette - Mario Series PART SIX - 06/26 Hitori Gotoh - Bocchi the Rock! VS Mitsuri Kanroji - Demon Slayer Hinako Mishuku - Your Turn to Die VS Nao Egokoro - Your Turn to Die Riamu Yumemi - The iDOLM@STER Cinderella Girls VS Miyu Sakurada - Dig Delight Direct Drive DJ Sucy Manbavaran - Little Witch Academia VS Chuatury Panlunch - Gundam: The Witch from Mercury Ran - Urusei Yatsura VS Akira Kogami - Lucky Star Ilima - Pokemon VS Pastille - Starry Flowers  Kumatora - Mother 3 VS Amy Rose - Sonic the Hedgehog Setsuno - Toriko VS Genkai - YuYu Hakusho PART SEVEN - 06/27 Aubrey - OMORI VS Iris Sagan - AI: The Somnium Files Muku Sakisaka - Act! Addict! Actors! VS Tori Himemiya - Ensemble Stars Ribbon - Kirby VS Strawberry Crepe Cookie - Cookie Run Cotton Candy Cookie - Cookie Run VS Rambutan Cookie - Cookie Run Narciso Anasui - Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure VS Diavolo - Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure Yanagi Hanabusa - DREAM!ing VS Shion Mikekado - DREAM!ing Delta - Honkai Impact VS Elysia - Honkai Impact Kory Anders - Titans VS Gamora - Marvel Cinematic Universe PART EIGHT - 06/28 Sakura Haruno - Naruto VS Euphemia Li Brittania - Code Geass Kipo Oak - Kipo and the Age of Wonderbeasts VS Tom Lucitor - Star VS the Forces of Evil “Big” Jack Horner - Puss in Boots VS Princess Poppy - Trolls Machi Komacine - Hunter x Hunter VS Chika Fujiwara - Kaguya-Sama: Love is War Slurpuff - Pokemon VS Tinkaton - Pokemon Hilda Valentine Goneril - Fire Emblem: Three Houses VS Yae Miko - Genshin Impact Ortega - Pokemon VS Nurse Joy - Pokemon Tenebria - Epic Seven VS Tecna - Winx Club

#pink hair swag tourney #after several pain flare ups i finally got it done . sorry about the wait !!!

[shinestarhwaa]

ATEEZ Masterlist

OT8/Multiple members

You’ve got a friend in me (WooSanHwa smut)

Thirsty (WooSanHwa x reader Smut)

Hotelroom (WooSanHwa x reader smut)

Say My Name (OT8!Ateez x reader smut)

Only My Name (OT8!Ateez x reader smut but Wooyoung centric,, smut/angst) (pt2 of Say My Name)

One Kiss (SanSang x reader smut)

Like A Champ (WooSan x reader smut)

Served (WooSan x reader smut)

Inception (WooSan x reader smut)

Provocative (SanHwa x reader smut)

Chasing That Feeling (SeongJoong x reader smut)

What Happens In London (YunSanHwa x reader smut)

Truth Or Dare (OT8 Smut)

Fantasize (San centered but OT8 smut)

Hongjoong

6cm (smut)

Yes, master (smut)

Backstage Business (smut)

Knight of Pentacles (smut)

Honey (Are You Coming?) (smut)

One Last Time (smut, angst)

Quick (smut)

Seonghwa

Desire (smut)

New Horizons (smut)

Pancakes (Fluff)

Addicted (smut)

Aphrodite (smut)

King Of Swords (angst, smut)

Lady Of The Night (smut)

Hello Kitty (smut)

Eyes Roll (smut)

Moonlight (smut)

Paradise (smut)

Inferno (smut)

Crazy Form (smut)

On-Call (smut)

Yunho

Sweet Dreams (fluff)

Don’t You Worry (fluff)

Practice Round (smut)

Pretty Tiny (Smut)

Chariot (fluff)

Wake Up (smut)

Yeosang

The History teacher PART 1 (fluff)

The History teacher PART 2 (smut)

Ace Of Cups (smut)

Lip Gloss (smut)

Shimmer (smut)

San

Everytime (fluff, smut)

Waterfall (fluff, smut)

Falling (angst, fluff)

Neon (smut)

Asked For It (smut)

Asked For It PART 2 (smut)

I Promise (Angst)

Attention (smut, angst)

Movie Star (smut)

Ruby (smut)

Ruby Part 2 (smut)

Seven of Pentacles (smut, fluff)

Enemy (smut)

City Lights (smut)

Panty Stealer (smut)

The Butler (smut)

Mingi

The morning after (fluff)

Nirvana (smut)

The Devil (smut)

Cam Girl (smut)

Exile (angst)

Wooyoung

FEEL (Smut)

DIRRTY (Smut)

Flash (Angst, fluff)

No Homo (smut) 

Maybe Homo (smut, part 2 of No Homo)

Temperance (fluff,smut)

Birthday Celebrations (smut)

The Boy Who Got Misunderstood (angst, fluff, smut)

You&Me (smut)

Thirsty (smut)

Poison (smut)

Good Lil Boy (smut)

Autumn (fluff)

IT's YOU (smut)

Jongho

Come And Go (Angst)

Happy To Help (smut)

Seven Of Cups (Angst, fluff)

Chances (smut)

#kpop #ateez #smut #fluff #angst #seonghwa #san #hongjoong #yunho #yeosang #mingi #wooyoung #jongho

[lyselkatzfandomluvs]

Mysterious Lotus Casebook 蓮花樓

2023.09.16 concert video MASTERPOST

SONGS

Outside the Mountains 山外 ☆ Chéng Yì 成毅 - Zeng ShùnXi 曾舜晞 - Xiao ShùnYáo 肖順堯

Blades and Swords are but a Dream 刀劍如夢 ☆ Chéng Yì 成毅

Love of a Lifetime 一生所愛 ☆ Zeng ShùnXi 曾舜晞

Flourishing 繁華 ☆ Xiao ShùnYáo 肖順堯

Blooming Flowers Full Moon Night 花好月圓夜 ☆ Chén DuLíng 陳都靈

My Orange Glow 橘色暖霞 ☆ Zeng ShùnXi 曾舜晞

Road 路 ☆ Wáng HèRùn 王鶴潤

Chasing Light 追光 ☆ Xiao ShùnYáo 肖順堯

Turn 轉彎 ☆ Chéng Yì 成毅

One of Eight Billion Eons 八十億萬分之一 ☆ Chén YìHán 陳意涵

A Pot of Lotus Wine 一壶蓮花醉 ☆ Hú Xià胡夏

Those Years 那些年 ☆ Hú Xià 胡夏

Three Inches Paradise 三寸天堂 ☆ Yán YìDan 嚴藝丹

The World is Too Hasty 人世太匆忙 ☆ Yán YìDan 嚴藝丹 - Chén Yì 成毅

Land Under the Heavens 天下 ☆ Chéng Yì 成毅 - Zeng ShùnXi 曾舜晞 - Xiao ShùnYáo 肖順堯

Top of the Martial World 就在江湖之上 ☆ Ensemble Cast

Some EXTRA

The Queencard dance ☆ Ensemble Cast

Chéng Yì 成毅 backstage Vlog

Xiao ShùnYáo 肖順堯 rehearsal vlog

The jianghú fashion catwalk

Jiâo-jie's dreams come true

Pictures posts are under the actors' tags.

#mysterious lotus casebook #mysterious lotus casebook concert #chen yi #xiao shunyao #zeng shunxi #wang herun #chen duling #chen yihan #he gang #yan yidan #hu xia #chinese actresses #chinese actors #chinese musicians #masterpost

[parmahamlarrie]

Welcome back to another post for the directory of fic recs on my blog! As Omegaverse fics are one I adore, this will be our first multiparter! If you would like a specific theme or trope, let me know! As always, these are all fics I have read and loved, and think you should read too. **This post will be updated as I have read more fics in this theme to recommend!**

Pretty Please (With Sugar on Top) || @angelichl || 113.6k A/B/O, Sugar baby Harry, Omega Harry, Alpha Louis, Soulmate AU

Make It Up As We Go Along || @lululawrence || 52.2k  A/B/O, Poly, Movie Adaptation, KidFic, OT5

Truebonds || @jacaranda-bloom || 39.6k A/B/O, Truebonds, Omega Louis, Alpha Harry, Farmer Louis, Scenting

Quiet People Have the Loudest Minds || @2tiedships2 || 38k A/B/O, Strangers to Lovers, Mute Louis

voicemail sings a wreck || @falsegoodnight || 37k  A/B/O, College AU, American AU, Enemies to Lovers, Frat AU

Too Young To Know || @2tiedships2 || 35.4k   A/B/O, Exes to Lovers, Lou has a boyfriend, Fluff and Angst

dream about a summer night || @onlythebravest || 33.6k A/B/O, Friends to Lovers, Summer Camp AU

Short and Sweet || 5ft9 || 29.6k   A/B/O, Strangers to Lovers, Tattoo Artist H, Super Soft Lou

Introduction to Dynamics || @juliusschmidt || 29.1k  A/B/O, Omega Louis, Presenting, Coming of Age, Uni AU, Strangers to Friends to Lovers

two sugars || @sun-lt || 21.6k A/B/O, Mental Health, Nesting, Strangers to Lovers

taken by lust’s strange inhumanity || @larrydoinglaundry || 20.6k A/B/O, Alpha Louis, Omega Harry, College AU, Frat Brother Louis, Intersex Omega, Virgin Harry

how do I stay tender || jessicamcqueen || 16.8k A/B/O, Alpha Harry, Omega Louis, Neighbors, Touch Deprivation, Nesting

love so soft, you ain’t had nothing softer Series || @neondiamond || 15.4k  A/B/O, Alpha Louis, Omega Harry, Fluff/Smut

A Fateful Snow || @parmahamlarrie || 13k A/B/O, Christmas, Christmas Tree Farm, Small Business Owners, Fluff

Come In and Change My Life || @lightwoodsmagic || 12.1k A/B/O, Famous/Non-Famous, Mpreg, Strangers to Friends to Lovers

hit me with your sweet love (kill me with a kiss) || @bottomhaztoplou || 11.5k A/B/O, Alpha Louis, Omega Harry, Courting, Fluff, Valentine’s Day

resolutions and lovers in the kitchen || orphan_account || 10.8k A/B/O, Heat, Established Relationship, Fluff and Smut

Cut me up, kiss me harder || @lunarheslwt || 9.4k A/B/O, Alpha Harry, Omega Louis, Enemies to Lovers, Spin the Bottle

Find Me in the Kitchen || @neondiamond || 9.2k A/B/O, Cooking Lessons, Fluff

All I Needed || @fallinglikethis || 9.1k Harry Potter AU, A/B/O, Alpha Louis, Omega Louis

my heart's against your chest, your lips pressed to my neck (I'm in love now) || @bottomhaztoplou || 8.8k A/B/O, College AU, Courting, Friends to Lovers, Roommates

Can We Start Believing || @fearlesslysweetcreature || 8.1k A/B/O, Nesting, Friends to Lovers

young hearts on the chase || @polaroidlouis || 7.4k A/B/O, Courting, Alpha Louis, Omega Harry, Soft Harry

they found the evidence and they found your fingerprints (all on me) || angelsueavenue || 6.6k A/B/O, Alpha Louis, Omega Harry, College AU, Pining, Jealousy, Scenting, Friends to Lovers, Parties, Winter

when we get intimate || rainblou || 6.5k A/B/O, College AU, Ace Harry, Nesting

Lost in your Paradise || @sadaveniren || 6.3k A/B/O, Public Sex, Unplanned Pregnancy

just the two of us (we can make it if we try) || @starryhaze28 || 5.9k  A/B/O, Pregnant Harry, Omega Drop, Established Relationship

Get Nesting & Soft Knots || @pocketsunshineharry || 5.7k A/B/O, Youtuber Louis, Knitter Harry, Nesting, Touch Depri

breathe into your well || turnyourankle || 4.7k A/B/O, Rut Bar, Heat/Rut, PwP

Mr. Tomlinson || @canonlarry || 4.2k A/B/O, CEO Louis

Spring Fever || @kingsofeverything || 4k A/B/O, Mpreg, Unplanned Pregnancy

take you with me every time I go away || starryhaze || 3.6k A/B/O, Established Relationship, Anxious Harry, Portable Nest

my lap is the best place for you to be || @bottomhaztoplou || 2.9k A/B/O, Historical, Intersex Omegas, Pregnant Harry, Established Relationship

The Scarf || @homosociallyyours || 2.6k A/B/O, Nesting, Getting Together

this love is ours || wherewestwood || 2.5k A/B/O, Established Relationship, Chirping

‘cause I built a home for you || angelsueavenue || 2.3k A/B/O, Mpreg, Fluff, Nesting

Baby, Don’t Apologize || @neondiamond || 1.8k A/B/O, Established Relationship, Alpha Louis, Omega Harry, Asexual Harry

Sigh Softly || aalexandravictoriaa || >1k A/B/O, Established Relationship, Nesting

#tracksintheam #trackinghappily #trackinghome #1dsource #fic rec #fic rec list #larry fic rec #my fic rec lists #omegaverse #omegaverse fic rec

[beau-is-here]

Hazbin hotel makes the parallel between Charlie and Emily very clear. Hovever, this parallel goes beyond the princesses of heaven and hell when we look at their parental figures.

Through the examination of Sera and Lucifer's parenting and prideful decisions, one can see how not only the two farthest entities from each other - literally good vs evil - can be alike, but also how they can dictate the future of Hazbin Hotel.

I feel like it's already been established that Charlie and Emily are so similar. Their personalities, outlooks on the extermination, CHAREXTER DESIGN? "you didn't know" with their duet just ties it all together. But Lucifer and Sera? It might take a bit of explaining on my end…

Lucifer's relationship with his daughter, Charlie, has always been pretty strained. After Lilith repeatedly separated the two, Lucifer became depressed about not seeing Charlie, though he never acted on it.

At the beginning of episode 5, Lucifer has very adamant feelings about sinners; they suck. Because he had been cursed to only see the evil he had brought onto man kind (which i will dive deeper into later), all he sees is a worthless pile of rubbish, and he tries to warn Charlie about this. In a way, he is overprotective of Charlie, wanting to keep her safe from being heartbroken about the hotel if it goes wrong.

Much like Lucifer, Sera is separated from Emily, the other seraphim. Emily was devised that Sera had chosen to allow the exterminations, which led to distrust and betrayal between the two.

Sera also tries to sway the mind of Emily. Sera holds a hatred, or a prejudice, towards sinners, and forbids Emily from helping Charlie with anything to do with rehabilitation, going as far as to continually justify her own actions by saying that she had to do she could "keep heaven safe". She is overprotective as well, and projects her fears of Emily falling onto the younger Seraphim, much like how Lucifer projected his fear of heartbreak onto Charlie.

But wait, there's more. As we all know, Lucifer's prideful decision was giving Eve the apple of knowledge in hopes of satisfying his creativity. However, he ends up spreading evil into earth and ultimately getting "locked out of heaven" (just dance fans laugh please). Not only is he punished by being kicked out of paradise, but he also is cursed to the shame in only seeing the bad parts of humanity that HE had created. This is why he loses faith, despite having the opportunity to be its leader. Side note: this is what makes episode 8 so much stronger - Lucifer ends up defending the sinners of hell, showing his change in perspective over the course of the season.

Even though she is supposed to be virtuous and righteous, Sera also makes a prideful decision. This is her agreement to allow the extermination. She does this because her pride is threatened by the uprise of hells power due to Lilith's influence. Because she feels threatened, Sera's first thought is to allow a genocide to happen under her control. However, unlike Lucifer, she has no predetermined consequence. Instead, she suffers the guilt of knowing she has allowed this heinous act. This is why she so desperately hides it from heaven's population, because she is ashamed of her decision.

In conclusion, Lucifer and Sera are two sides of the same coin. While one resides in hell, the other "flourishes" in heaven. However, while Sera stifles the spirit and ambition of Emily, Lucifer changes his view on sinners through Charlie, and thus allows her to continue chasing her dream of the hazbin hotel. Or, in this case, to "shine in the spotlight". If Sera and Lucifer are such parallels, then I predict Sera to eventually make the same choice as Lucifer, and allow Emily to support Charlie in her mission of helping sinners get into heaven. Cause what Sera really needs is to have a change of heart.

#hazbin hotel #hazbin theory #hazbin hotel lilith #hazbin lucifer #hazbin charlie #hazbin sera #hazbin emily #hazbin hotel charlie #hazbin hotel lucifer #hazbin hotel sera #hazbin hotel emily #hazbin #hazbin hotel theory #hazbin spoilers

[mushroomwoods]

Sunflower Fields

the rustling wind was all too characteristic now, dream or not, he just wished to remember your voice...

character — wars, romantic or platonic

cw — mild angst with happy ending.

this is a gift i made for the loveliest @wayfayrr and took way too long to post because tumblr is a bitch, but since i am here now... enjoy! ps: i made an art commission from the dearest @h4wari. check it out, it's amazing!

The calm summer breeze blew, comforting and slightly humid as it ruffled his hair along with the scarf.

Blue star coloured eyes focused on the horizon, the chatting and bantering happening beside him barely catching his attention.

He looked lost.

As if chasing after something oh so far away, yet he didn't know what it was.

“Dozing off again, Link?” Impa voice resounded, breaking him off his stupor, gladiolus eyes thinning at the blank stare the warrior offered her.

“Let it be, Impa.” Zelda cut through, graciously stirring the tea before she poured one cup for herself.

“Ah, I can do it, Your Highness-” As Impa tried to stand up, the princess simply waved her hand.

Link took a sip of his own tea, already cold, though the gentle rosemary scent still filled his nostrils, a vague memory of Zelda telling him it was one of her favorite ones coming to mind, yet as the flavor seeped into his mouth he could only grimace.

Bitter.

The princess lightly pushed the sugar pot nearer to him, yet the hero refused, setting the porcelain cup back to the saucer with a muted clack.

“Excuse me, but I have to go back to my duties.” A blatant lie, he had been given a week off just the previous day.

Nonetheless, the princess nodded in understanding, barely looking his way as he made his way out of the garden. The gerbera daisies surrounded him the whole way out, as if mocking him, the sunny yellow shade only serving to make his mood worse.

He couldn’t understand why it was happening, why sometimes there were lapses of memories within him, the figments of a voice and a soft touch that caressed his cheeks with so much tenderness that he wanted to cry. He knew that such a thing could never have happened in the past as he spent most of his time in the war and taking care of his job as a commander.

His fists clenched when he finally reached the outer walls of the castle, the soldiers guarding the area bowed to him in respect, before opening the gates.

Freedom at last.

Somehow, after everything that happened, he couldn’t feel at ease while in that place, when near those people, when he got reminded of every single nightmare he had to push through, he felt as if drowning amidst the suffocating essence of abatina flowers, her image resurfacing to his mind even when he tried so hard to wipe it out of the memory.

With a sigh, he started heading back to his quarter, a vague sensation of deja vu overcoming his body, the rustling of the crisp summer air brushing his hair as if it was a loving hand.

The path home was quiet, some people greeting him here and there, to which was answered by his collected smile.

A fake.

Somehow nothing made sense, nothing seemed real, no amount of working or enjoyment made him feel at ease.

As the door to his house was opened, the red columbine in his stand shriveled, petals droopy, as thirst for a little drop of water, even then he ignored it, too aware of his own cowardice, hanging his uniform as he made his way to the bed.

The tired body just crumbled onto the bed, not trying to hold onto consciousness as he fell into a deep slumber.

…

He felt weightless, the usual tiredness not heaving into his shoulder.

A patch of small sunflowers surrounded him, someone sitting amidst it, a laughter familiar to him.

They said something that he couldn't quite understand, but before he could ask anything, they walked towards him, taking his hands into theirs, comforting and warm just as he remembered.

They laughed before bursting into hundreds of birds of paradise, colourful and filled with emotions.

Link didn't have any time to process it, however, as his eyes opened, the rays of light shone down on him as yet another day started.

Repeating it all once again.

He wished to sigh, but staying still at the same place for so long wouldn't do him any good, and only make him pity himself even more.

Just as he opened the curtains of his bedroom, his eyes widened, the place that should have been a vast open hill, was now covered in a patch of sunflowers, much like the dream he just had.

Not even bothering to take his usual uniform, he headed out in a flurry, tripping over his own feet as he stumbled towards the door.

As he opened it, the sight that greeted him was a familiar, yet unknown figure, surrounded by the townsfolk, all carrying bouquets of sunflowers, and placing it around the now covered patch of land.

The mysterious person's eyes met his, and they didn't hesitate before approaching him, the white-pink valerians in their arms standing out among the bright yellow blooms everyone else held.

“I'm sure you didn't expect it, Link.” Their familiar voice rang inside his heart, and he unknowingly smiled at it.

“You… how..?” So many questions flooded his head, yet no coherent words came out.

Scalding hot tears brimmed around his eyes, and with a soft smile they brushed it out of his face.

“I'm sorry that it took me so long to get to you my dear.” They answered with a melancholic smile, offering him the valerian bouquet.

He hesitated for a second, yet the moment he saw the guilt in your eyes, he carefully took it, not wasting any more time before taking you into a warm embrace.

“I missed you so much…” Link said.

“Me too, Link.” You sobbed into his arms.

Blue Star — Strength, Resilience

Gladiolus — Victorious, Strength

Rosemary — Remembrance

Gerbera Daisies (Yellow) — Appreciation in relationships

Abatina — Fickleness

Red columbine — Anxious, Trembling

Dwarf Sunflower — Adoration

Bird of Paradise — Freedom

Valerian — Readiness

#warriors x reader #linked universe warriors #linked universe #linked universe x reader #lu warriors #warriors #fungi's delicacies