#child abuse

[theconcealedweapon]

When you're autistic, it's impossible to miss how much society normalizes child abuse.

I could dedicate my entire life to studying how to interact with people and I'd still never master the social skills that young children are expected to have on command.

Say the wrong thing? That's disrespectful and you're punished. And you don't even have to actually say anything wrong. Pretty much anything you say can be considered "giving lip" if your parent wants some excuse to punish you. But if you say nothing, then you get punished for ignoring. You also have to calculate your response to their mind game quickly because taking too long to respond is considered ignoring. Also, if you're being wrongly accused of something, saying nothing is considered a confession. And even if you somehow manage to say exactly what your parent wants in exactly the correct tone, they'll still punish you for "sarcasm" or "not really meaning it".

#autism #actuallyautistic #child abuse

[furiousgoldfish]

Asking for help when you're being abused, doesn't come naturally. It, in fact, feels counter-productive, dangerous, wrong, bad, shameful, mortifying, scary, burdensome (for the person you're asking), and sometimes the abused person can feel like they would rather keep to themselves forever, than reach out and say what is going on.

This is not accidental; abusers make it so on purpose. They spend a lot of effort convincing you that you're a burden on the entire world, that you're attention hungry and making things up to stir up drama, that you lie and remember things wrong, that you should be ashamed of what was done to you and how you made the abuser do it. Even if not spoken out loud, it is very clear that if you said anything to anyone, you would be punished, shamed, and put trough even worse abuse than what you're experiencing right now. That things would turn around to make you seem like you're the worse one in the situation and everyone would side with the abuser.

So reaching out for help, after a certain point, feels useless. Like you'd be only inconveniencing people around you, showing them how incapable you are, how helpless and pathetic and ashamed you feel, and nobody would be able to help you anyway. Abusers make it seem like they're above law and authority, the idea that just another person could do anything to stop them feels ridiculous. And there's a possibility outsiders will side with the abuser, making the situation infinitely worse for you, because they will tell the abuser and get you into worse trouble.

Not asking for help, and instead just surviving or maybe independently trying to get away, is not a sign of a fault, or a person not trying hard enough and not wanting help. It means the situation is so bad that involving another person might mean extra danger, and doesn't lead to resolving the situation.

When you think about it, what does your average person do to help someone in abuse? There's no easy steps to secure somebody's safety. A person might report it, which might end up just pissing the abuser off. The victim often has no other place to go, so now they're threatened with homelessness. Someone offering you a place to stay might work short-term, while also being dangerous, but victims need more than short-term solutions. They need permanent, foolproof and secure life plan to stay away from the abuser. They need resources that help them access safe places to indefinitely stay in, they need consistent income, and a community to keep them safe. This is not something that anyone can just offer, and even programs that offer some of this help, are temporary.

Sometimes we don't ask for help because we can tell that help is impossible, and sometimes, we're conditioned not to, we have gone trough torture for just thinking of telling someone what's going on. We still want the abuse to stop. We still need to get away. We're still doing our best to survive and escape, while also trying to not inconvenience anyone around us.

#reaching out for help #anti victim blaming #psychological abuse #escaping abuse #child abuse #domestic abuse #surviving abuse #emotional abuse #gaslighting #being trapped in abuse

[allthecanadianpolitics]

The trial of a Carievale, Sask., man charged with abducting his daughter ended Friday with a jury finding him guilty.

Court heard Michael Gordon Jackson failed to return his seven-year-old daughter to the care of her mother, who had primary custody, after a long-weekend visit in November 2021.

Jackson, who represented himself at the trial in Regina Court of King's Bench, had told the jury his only intention was to prevent his daughter from getting the COVID-19 vaccine. Jackson said he believed the vaccine would harm his daughter and claimed the mother did not let him know her views on the vaccine for months.

The Crown argued that Jackson's goal of keeping his daughter unvaccinated meant that he purposely kept the girl away from her mother. The prosecutor also said there is no doubt Jackson made his concerns about the COVID-19 vaccine clear, but the girl's mother had the final say according to the custody agreement. 

After the mother told Jackson that she planned to get their daughter vaccinated, he decided to "take the law into his own hands" and keep her, the Crown said. [...]

Continue Reading.

Tagging: @newsfromstolenland, @vague-humanoid

#cdnpoli #vaccination #child abuse #neglect #Saskatchewan #Carievale

[fnord888]

Child abuse is a big problem, so it's important that we don't let children communicate with adults except their parents and other official authority figures. Everyone knows the best way to prevent child abuse is to keep children isolated and ensure all their communications are controlled.

#massive sarcasm quotes #current events #vagueblogging #child abuse

[teaboot]

Adult ProTip, from a security professional: If a kid tells you, "My parents are gonna kill me / kick my ass / kick me out" for something relatively minor, don't respond with shit like "Really? ;) that sounds a little extreme, don't you think sweetie?" because that shit really does happen.

Instead, respond as though whatever threat they are afraid of is fully valid, and offer whatever you can do to help- ask if they believe they are in danger of being hurt in any way, and work accordingly.

If they're overreacting, they'll usually realize and dial it back, self-correct and begin thinking a bit more rationally.

If they're not overreacting, and the danger is real, then they'll need a level-headed adult in their corner, not another condescending authority figure who doesn't believe them.

#References to abuse #Child abuse #CA TW

[lostmf]

#sadnees #tw depressing thoughts #depressing shit #i'm sad #depressing life #tw depressing stuff #quotes #childhood trauma #poetic #childhood #childhood ptsd #childhood truama #child abuse #tw selfhate #self h@rm #truamacore #kill my thoughts #kill my feelings #complex ptsd #how could you #just cptsd things #scribbles #are you proud of me #daddy issues #this is a cry for help #family #abandoned #ptsd #i hate my existence #wound tw

[serialunaliver]

I think one thing that's hard for people to grapple with is it's impossible to eliminate all abusive individuals from any given society. Of course certain systems encourage and make it easier to achieve, but there is no perfect world in which no one is abusive, so prevention of abuse shouldn't be punitive measures but rather creation of an environment in which abuse is hard to get away with--an environment more focused on community support than individualistic isolation of families. The fact that there are horrifying child torture cases that occurred in average suburban homes by neighbors who suspected nothing just because they haven't even talked to or acknowledged the people living right fucking next to them is crazy.

#child abuse #abuse #seriousposting

[a-sip-of-milo]

It's always infuriated me hearing people say that children have it easy. It's only gotten worse as I've gotten older and have been able to reflect on my childhood and see the children around me grow up.

They do not have it easy. They don't get a say in most important things. They're seen is unintelligent, yet expected to understand things that full grown adults struggle with.

They've got a job, which is school, that is actually proven to not be working for a lot of them; myself included. They're expected to sit still and in silence for at least forty minutes at a time, and those with ADHD are treated as though they're immature and lazy because they often physically can't do it.

Far too many of them have abusive parents that lie through their teeth to make people think everything is fine, and of course, who would believe the child over the parent?

Aspects of abuse has been normalised. Parents are sympathised with when children open up about the things they've gone through, especially if they're not physical. They're told that their parents are only doing this because they love them, or that the child needs to start seeing things from their point of view. Meanwhile, adults can freely complain about their children on public forums and to friends and family and get away with it because "it's hard being a parent".

Fuck off and do better.

DNI Believers of narcissistic/borderline/anti-social/histrionic abuse.

#child abuse #tw child abuse #adhd #actually adhd #childhood ptsd #childhood memories #tw childhood abuse #narc abuse does not exist #npd safe

[whatbigotspost]

Damn a lot of gen X and millennial teens sure were Guinea pigs in the horrific experiment* of all the “scared straight” and “behavioral corrections programs” and “military schools” and “therapeutic boarding schools” and “pray out the gay camps” and other fucking abusive “give us your troubled teens and we’ll fix em up” bullshit that was extremely popular in the 90s and 00s.

They’re telling all the stories now and have been for years and the depths of the horrors are mind boggling. They’re making all the docs and writing all the books and pulling back the lids on all the seedy underbellies and throwing the terror into the light so we can all stare at all the traumas that occurred and in some places are still occurring.

*btw we can say beyond all doubt none of this shit “worked” to help ANYONE of course. Except the abusers who got to get rich off of abuse. So many of the survivors will be the first to say they’re deeply fucked up by it and many haven’t survived the experience. Messed up beyond words.

#child abuse #violence

[sayruq]

[Cont] treatment until he was received by the Red Cross a few hours ago.

[Cont] the Negev Desert Israeli jail, speaks about torture practiced in Israeli jails.

#yemen #jerusalem #tel aviv #current events #palestine #free palestine #gaza #free gaza #torture #child abuse #tw abuse

[theconcealedweapon]

Parent: "Telling me that you struggle with what I expect of you is arguing. If you do that, you will be punished."

Parent (20 Years Later): "I'm sorry for expecting too much of you. I didn't mean to. I had no way of knowing that you struggled. I tried my best."

#child abuse #authoritarian parenting

[harmful-tropes]

I have a distinct memory of laying in my bed as a kid and wishing with all my heart that I would get hurt. That I would get into a bad car crash or I'd disappear. So my parents would cry and realize they didn't cherish me enough.

I find it sad that younger me thought she had to get hurt to feel loved.

#mentally unstable #depressing shit #tw depression #sad thoughts #child abuse #childhood trauma #vent

[allthecanadianpolitics]

A new study by Quebec researchers paints a stark portrait of education and employment rates among the province's vulnerable youth. 

One-third of young people who have been placed under the care of Quebec's youth protection services, the Direction de la protection de la jeunesse (DPJ), are unemployed and aren't enrolled in a school at age 21, according to the study.

Commissioned by Quebec's employment ministry and conducted by the Chaire-Réseau de Recherche sur la Jeunesse du Québec the study looked at the experiences of 1,136 people with youth protection services.

It found that young people in Quebec's youth protection system are twice as likely to drop out of school compared to the general population, with only a quarter obtaining a high school diploma by the age of 19, and 37 per cent obtaining the degree by 21. 

Karolane Chénier-Richard isn't at all surprised by the findings. As a teenager, she dropped out of school and says she didn't get the kind of support she needed in Quebec. [...]

Continue Reading.

Tagging: @newsfromstolenland, @vague-humanoid

#cdnpoli #child abuse #DPJ #childcare #Québec

[self-loving-vampire]

I feel like a lot of people don’t really fully grasp the idea that abusive parents exist and are both common and, to a degree, socially acceptable.

Like, they may be aware of the fact but have not yet actually integrated it into their worldview, personal beliefs, or policy proposals.

#abuse #child abuse #100 #1k #2k #3k #4k #5k #10k #15k #20k

[neuroticboyfriend]

As an adult still living with their abusive parent, I often find that affirmations meant to empower me are unhelpful at best. They often feel like they're overstating the amount of agency I have as an adult; I've spent my entire life being abused. It's all I know and I have a lifetime of conditioning and nervous system damage to show for it.

All that doesn't just go away now that I'm older than 18, and neither do the material circumstances that keep me here. Even though I have more legal rights and have grown since I was younger, I am still not in control by the very nature of being the victim in an abusive relationship. So, for those who relate, here are some affirmations that might hit different:

My abuser does not have my best interests in mind, even if they think they do.

I am my own person; my mind and body belong to me.

My feelings are justified, and I deserve to feel and express them.

I am doing what I need to survive, and that is all I need to do.

I am doing my best given the knowledge, resources, and support I have.

I am the only person who can decide what is best for me.

My situation is unfair and wrong. I deserve to be happy and safe.

I do not have to engage in toxic positivity; that will only hurt me.

As long as I am alive, there is something good in this life for me - no matter how small.

I have inherent rights just because I exist.

I shouldn't have to deal with this on my own; I deserve support and protection.

Everything I need is something I deserve. Everything I deserve is something I need.

If any of these don't resonate, feel free to discard them. Everyone finds comfort and empowerment differently.

#softspoonie #disabled #disability #trauma #trauma survival #affirmations #trauma survivor #trauma victim #abuse survival #abuse survivor #abuse victim #abuse #child abuse #survivor #childhood trauma #traumatized #trauma recovery #cptsd #ptsd #mental health #mental health support #mental health tips #healing #recovery #complex ptsd #c ptsd #c-ptsd #mental illness #mentally ill

[conurecc]

nothing like citing bible verses while justifying child abuse

ain't no hate like christian love

curiously the majority of states that allow for corporal punishment in school (read: literal child abuse) are run by Republicans

& this remains the most accurate meme i ever made

#politics #oklahoma #republicans #are a danger to children #child abuse #corporal punishment