For the DC x DP server gift exchange!
Constantine has been taking care of dealing with a stray King of the dead for a while now
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nothing in my head except for thoughts of bruce and constantine co-parenting billy.
like it could very well be platonic co parents bruce and john, but i think it could be a very tense pining situation - but doesn’t matter, however you interpret it just imagine how funny the dynamics would be
john: well i saw him first
bruce drafting up adoption papers: too bad
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john: and if you trace this rune here you can summon trigon, although raven will get her knickers in a twist over it
bruce: no summoning powerful demon lords in the manor
billy: but bruceeeeee
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billy: dad
bruce and john: yes? [glaring at eachother appalled that the other thinks they have the right to think of themselves of billy’s father]
billy totally doing this on purpose with a shit eating grin: dad?
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teacher: so are you little billy’s father?
bruce and john simultaneously: yes
teacher: oh! just know we are a very accepting community and find your relationship heartwarming! now if you would head this way i believe billy drew a wonderful portrait of your massive families mr. wayne’s
bruce snaking a hand around john’s waist, grinding his teeth: of course, shall we dear?
john pinching bruce so hard he’s sure it draws blood: yes anything you say love
billy: aw man there goes my two christmases… :(
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billy: this is why i like dad’s better, at least he lets me summon supernatural kings from other dimensions
bruce in tears: you don’t mean that
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bruce: i’m not letting you keep a tiger at the manor
john: don’t be ass, let the boy have his talking tiger
bruce: oh well i don’t think you have a say in this mr. ‘soul tax evader’
john: oh fuck off you furry bat
billy: god, if you’re there, i really don’t wanna see them make out in front of me
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damian and billy playing a board game while gossiping:
billy: my dad and your dad wanna smash, don’t they?
damian sighing: unfortunately constantine’s… rugged look has enamored my father
billy:…
damian: …
billy: ten bucks says they ‘consummate’ their marriage by the end of the month
damian: hm, twenty dollars that by the end of this week they’ve had preformed coitus
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billy: i miss when you guys were at each others throats, no one wants to see you guys grope each other at breakfast
dick: i think it’s sweet
jason: they defiled the library, definitely not sweet dickhead, it’s practically child abuse to watch them basically on top of each other
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idk i think it’s a neat au, even if there’s no canon whatsoever to make this even sort of plausible in the slightest.
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Unexpectedly normal
John Constantine falling in love with an Eldritch creature wasn't the weirdest thing he'd ever loved. After his dates with King Shark and some demons, this was among his most normal romances!
Phantom seemed like a creature of darkness and ice but he was the opposite: attentive, kind and loving; things that generally shouldn't be combined with Constantine (given his usual tendency to blow his chance with anyone who treated him well), but something made him stick with him.
Sure, the Justice League Dark judged him every time they saw him but he couldn't care less. When Phantom nervously told him he had something he wanted to show him, John was prepared for anything: a cult, a corpse, some crime he'd have to feign ignorance of (he didn't mind helping with a crime or two).
He hadn't expected Phantom to decide to show him his "true form" (Unexpectedly his boyfriend looked human, usually the opposite happened to him!), and sheepishly admitted that the first time he came to the dimension his powers had gotten out of control, leaving him in a form he used very little. And fuck, his boyfriend was hot as hell.
Constantine remembered when they met, he remembered the cult summoning "the most powerful creature in existence", he remembered the dread he felt when he saw Phantom appearing in all his Eldritch glory, but most of all, he remembered his disbelief when the creature started scolding the cultists as if they were children.
Phantom admitted his name was Danny (Danny Phantom, he just forgot to mention it), and he didn't know how to tell him, he looked so nervous that John couldn't help but joke with him.
"Are you human? These are things you talk about in time, bloody hell" Constantine pretended to be offended, pulling a cigarette out of his jacket "you know damn well I don't date normal humans sweetheart."
Danny looked confused, but understood what was going on in a matter of seconds.
"Lucky for you I'm not a normal human" Danny joked, taking the cigarette from his hands "I'm half ghost, a walking physical impossibility, is that enough for your dating standards?"
John pretended to think before shrugging and kissing him; sure, he'd have to get used to the lack of darkness, and extra organs (though he was sure he could persuade Danny to switch between forms), but as far as he was concerned, this was just a win-win.
Danny wondered if he should have started with Phantom's form first but he had no desire to give the hellblazer more ideas. He was aware of his partner's odd tastes, so he was actually nervous that he would reject him for being human (which was definitely a big difference from Amity), but as John kissed him just as intensely as always he guessed there was nothing to worry about.
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Constantine: The Hellblazer issue 9. Demons using human souls as currency described by John Constantine as "human souls like coins" used "in exchange for petty, hollow entertainments".
Vs
Legends of Tomorrow season 5; human souls as literal coins, used as currency in Hell
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DP x DC
Danny inner feeling is "save" (based on agit)
But as you could think of a 14 year old bulied teen with a unstable family life, who died. Didn't just want to save people, he also wanted to be saved.
Nobody knew this not even Danny.
But Constantin and Deadman both have the same problem. Sometimes when they are in the Watchtower they hear a child like voice, who is alway whispering:" somebody save me. I need help. Save me this is dagerous."
They never see something strange, a few other heroes, a few mechanics. All normal, they also don't hear it all the time. They just hear it when it's Danny's shift and he's working nearby, though a wall through the floor goes the konstant whisper.
It almost drives them insane.
Then Constantin realized that it might goes with the working shifts. Somebody must be haunted.
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