[190210 13:41] Some days..
..I want to conquer it all; be good at job, learn many languages, travel the world, know different cultures, the history, economy, finances, law and then some other days, I wonder if I could live life by just being... here.
having trouble describing exactly what I mean but I think dean is a contrarian but in a fun way. he enjoys performing being grumpy and argumentative but there’s no real commitment behind it. like it’s a bit he’s doing. claire will tell him he drinks old man beer and he says fuck you no I don’t *takes a sip of old man beer* but he’s self aware about it. they do this in the show pretty frequently, like he’ll say X thing is stupid and then immediately does X, but the punchline is often “dean isn’t aware of how stupid and obviously hypocritical he looks.” and I mean sometimes that is true, but I think he’s a lot more shrewd about how he comes across than the show generally frames it. he tells sam “vegetable water” is gay and disgusting and then 10 minutes later he’s pouring himself a glass. he knows exactly what he’s doing
I'm thinking about Nervous again
He's brilliant, he's illiterate, he's an anomaly, he's just some guy, he has powers untold, he collects bottle caps, he understands things that would melt the average man's brain, he does not know what a birthday party is
Been thinking of a different timeline where Kihyuk lives and will eventually cross paths with Seokyoon at the residence. While Moonjo, the rest of the insane residents at eden, and even Jongwoo at certain times finds Seokyoon’s outgoing and talkative demeanor annoying, oddly enough, Kihyuk grows “fond” of it. Even more so, the younger captures his interest and attention. It’s not everyday that you will come across a sunshine in a run down place of a goshiwon that is the closest to hell as it can be.
Seokyoon being the sunshine that he is despite of the hardships that life continues to throw at him reminds Kihyuk of himself in the past.
He was once just like him too.
Until he gave up on everything.
Because apparently, it was all for nothing. It was all useless after the people that were once closest to him, betrayed him and left him damaged. It was enough to made him realized that hell is other people. It was a turning point for him.
So Kihyuk eventually slipped into the darkness where he found the strange comfort of being rarely liked by his “creator”.
So maybe in this timeline, instead of a descend to madness like with what happened to mjjw (it’s their brand at this point) Seokyoon would be a glimmer of hope and realization for Kihyuk that “Oh, maybe I was wrong. People are indeed hell, but not this one. This one is too special.”
I've been trying to articulate why ep 7 of Not Me is SO GOOD...and yes, it's because we got fed with danyok gems, with sean looking so soft for white under the pride flag, with white's joy as he bounces and yells alongside sean...but I think it's also because this episode was so layered.
It was full of complications and the reality of compromise. It was the realisation that the gangs actions have real world affects on normal hardworking people - like Yok's mum (and omg I loved seeing her again!). It was the conversation between Dan and Yok about the, yes, hypocrisy and contradiction of Dan's job and activism. It was the way in which we are made to sympathise with Dan because of the goodness of his heart (and tbh the chemistry of the characters)...but at the same time hear that - as a cop - he (ab)used his position in order to be able to access that abandoned building....proving exactly why there is a problem in the system.
As usual, I felt scared at times for the production team with some of the things that were being said/shown...but then they go all out and not just sprinkle a bit of representation but chucked the whole rainbow paint can at the picture. That marriage equality fashion show was fantastic, the joy it brought, the message it sends...I don't even know what I'm saying here...but I feel like it's showing the opposite of all the complications - love isn't complicated, it shouldn't be complicated. Marry whoever you want to marry. Why should it matter to anyone else?
And the music, kudos to the sound design team, finding all these gems in the background, adding to the changing atmosphere of the ep. Just 👩🏽🍳💋
And Film's eyes. That's it. Just her eyes. They're amazing. And I love love love the contemporary dance representation...in fact all the art inclusion...because yes, art is used as a way of bringing attention to issues in society, but also it's a very valid career choice and I love that it's shown that Eugene is studying it at university too. It's not just a 'hobby' but yes, dance - and other art - can be a career.
As Pran said, "Or you'd become a famous pirate."
queersue -> aboutmetamorphosis
inspired by all the times harry has talked about as it was and it’s meaning 🤍
“as it was is about metamorphosis and perspective change and the whole thing of like when you have that, it's not something you have time with. and people will be like oh we'll give you a couple more days with this moment, and you get to like say goodbye to your former self or whatever, it's like, by the time you realize it's already gone.” - (zane lowe)
"it’s about metamorphosis. about when you look back on life, and on your past selves, and barely recognize them. about when you realize everything has transformed, irrevocably. about when you grow up, change, begin to move on." - (better homes&garden)
"the song is about metamorphosis, embracing change and former self, perspective shift and all that kind of stuff. it just felt like the thing i wanted to say." (audacity)
Cale looking at people he somehow gathered: These were not plan of the plan!
Cale: The plan got fucking burnt, teared into pieces and said fuck you!
Cale: what the fuck did I do to deserve this?!??!
Also Cale: gave them a place to make their home
Cale: given them support and love
Cale: cared for them a lot and helped them
Cale: made them his own found family
uh, would you mind sharing your thoughts on Imogen? Your analysis on how jester and vex represented the two different sides of the offense and defense coin was interesting and I was wondering what your thoughts on Imogen were? That is if you don’t mind people asking
The mentioned Jester/Vex meta here.
Oh boy, would I like to share my thoughts about Imogen :')
(You absolutely do not need to apologize; I love to ramble on about character analysis and I also really fucking love talking about Imogen, specifically.)
I didn't include her in the original post mostly because. Well. We really don't know her yet! 10, 11 episodes is so early in getting to know a char, vs both Jester and Vex who have a campaign and few years worth of growth and analysis and data points to reference. So before I say anything else, big fucking flashing disclaimer that: I know its early! Things are VERY subject to change. This is all speculation, I am likely wrong, etc.
On the sliding scale of offense/defense mentality that I have apparently built, I think Imogen is a fascinating blend of both, although she definitely inches more towards offense, especially under fire.
More specifically: She strikes me as someone who sets up all her baseline rules to play defense, except all her plans B-Z immediately go for the jugular.
Imogen, in theory, is the kind of person to play it safe. By default, she comes off as relatively nervous and trying to get by without rocking the boat, or hurting, inconveniencing, or offending others. Lies with exceptional ease if she needs to get out of trouble. She is constantly, actively maintaining a literal defense against the ongoing barrage of other peoples thoughts. So. Yeah. That's pretty defensive.
Except. When it’s not. Except Imogen flips to the offense on a dime. When things start looking dicey, or when she wants to know something, or she just ... Wants to. We see her get ravenously, rudely curious. We see her projecting into people's minds to pester and intimidate, we see her lie audaciously and convincingly without batting an eye, we see her casting calm emotions or causing a ruckus. We see her shooting fucking lightning, bombarding psychic attacks, etc.
The second-guessing? The caution? Gone, replaced with a kind of terrifying ruthlessness. Fast, effectively, and with essentially zero hesitation. She’ll open herself up for danger and backlash if it means she gets shit done.
Don’t get me wrong, Imogen has a killer self preservation instinct- and I mean that both metaphorically and literally. It is evidently just outweighed by a sense of ravenous curiosity or a particular objective.
Jester offers friendship and means it (as an offer and a threat). Vex charms you from an arms distance while she mentally calculates your worth (your value, your danger). Imogen will lie and ask for help and be harmless and a little lost until she very suddenly isn't, and you find out her mind was elsewhere the whole time- in yours, on the objective, on her friends.
In terms of protector, protection, protecting- I think Imogen acts protectively, but less as an ingrained quality and more in service of one goal or another. (And most of the time that goal is: protect self. Protect Laudna. etc. But when it isn’t, that’s when it gets interesting.)
Imogen is playing defense by default, until she very suddenly isn’t. And she’s a smooth enough liar that you might not recognize the shift until it’s too late. :D