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#coping techniques
borderlinebastard · 1 year
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what “feeling better” can look like after using a coping technique:
beng able to get up and walk around safely
thinking/talking more clearly and lessening of brain fog
a willingness to re-engage with a situation/emotion (even with some reluctance)
ability to do a task you did not want to/could not do before
being able to plan and problem solve (even if you still don’t know what to do)
improved concentration/focus
more understanding of a situation
calmer and slower thoughts (rather than scattered thoughts/rumination)
slower heartbeat and breathing
faster heartbeat, if doing exercise, and momentum that gives you a chance to do a task before you sit down again
being able to sleep easier
an ability to look at the big picture and not get lost in the details
feeling that you can “manage”
ability to control outbursts/destructive behaviour or pause before acting
managing to stop crying
I think people tend to assume their mood is what will improve after trying coping techniques, however, your mood is not the full extent of your mental health, and it doesn’t totally define whether or not a technique has helped you. When disorders cause symptoms like chronic emptiness and low mood, it’s worthwhile to pay attention to your body and your abilities to look for signs of improvement, which can then have an affect on your mood in the long term.
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zenithsys · 1 year
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Do you feel, like, constantly overwhelmed? Unable to focus on tasks and self-care like showering? Have I got the tip for you
I recently got put on this method through a YouTube video recommended to me called the Sharp Ax method. Name doesn't matter, I'm gonna skip right to telling you what to do.
You have a notebook? Maybe one that you've horded and used once or twice before abandoning? Grab that shit. Get your favorite pen. At the top of the page you're going to write "Brain Dump". For like, 10-15 minutes, just sit there and write down every thought that comes to mind. Does your back hurt? Write it. Do you have to make breakfast? Write it.
But here's the thing: if there's something you need to do (paperwork, showering, shopping, etc) you're gonna write it like this.
"I want to shower." "I want to check the mailbox." "I want to do my laundry today."
For whatever reason, reframing things you need to do as things you want to do has helped me so immensely, and even when I can't finish all the things I want to finish, I still feel good for finishing the ones I was able to.
This stupidly simple journaling technique (which doesn't even feel like journalling to me) has caused me to go from being chronically overwhelmed to feeling like, even just for a little bit, everything is going to be okay.
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capricorn-0mnikorn · 6 months
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Sometimes, I need to un-sand my -wich.
I understand that a sandwich is meant to be "the main protein of a meal between two layers of bread in a meal, such that it can be eaten with one hand while playing cards."
But sometimes, the filling of a sandwich is too sloppy, saucy, or otherwise Just Too Much to be held in the hand.
In which case (in 'wich' case?), I put the filling in a bowl with extra sauce, tear up the bread into bite-sized pieces (dense, chewy bread is best), warm it up in the microwave for about a minute, and eat it like a salad.
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serenityquest · 24 days
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pig-e-on · 2 years
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please tell me other people also can't explicitly identify their coping strategies / skills / techniques / mechanisms for mental health issues?
like, i cannot think of A Single Thing that i do that helps me combat intrusive thoughts or bad feelings. same is true for meltdowns/shutdowns.
i just kind of.. wait them out? what works for other people??
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viktheviking1 · 4 months
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Y'ALL, I'VE CRACKED THE CODE
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For yeaaaaarrsss, I've gotten into an endless loop whenever I have to go to school or work, where I don't get ready to go, start hating on myself for being "lazy", and then procrastinate getting ready even more and end up late to everything.
And for years, I've had emergency anxiety meds, but only took them during panic attacks or when social anxiety spiked. Basically only if I could feel my heart racing and unnecessary adrenaline kicking in.
But dude, taking them while stuck in the loop of "lazy", has helped me so much!
Will this work for you? I don't know. You have a different body, and maybe you don't have anxiety meds, or have a different kind to mine. Maybe you are hesitant to take yours because it's slightly addictive. Maybe you're hesitant to take yours because of internalized stigma or you want to be able to not lean on it as a crutch.
I don't know what to tell ya for the first one, but let me ask you this.
Do you look at people who use crutches and think "they should be able to walk without that". NO! OF COURSE NOT!
Use your crutch, use your meds. They're there for a reason. They're there to help you.
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papermint-airplane · 9 months
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I haven't had an intrusive thought that has caused actual panic in a long time. I've gotten really good at facing my intrusive thoughts and being like "you're an intrusive thought and I'd like you to go ahead and shut the fuck up". That sounds unhinged af but that's an actual legitimate strategy that therapists tell people with OCD and anxiety (like me) to use. And it works well after a certain point (getting to that point is its own battle though). Now I can shut them down fairly quickly so they don't cause as much distress as they used to.
Sometimes, though, some of them slip through my defenses and make me have A Very Bad Time™. This is one of those times.
Hit the cut if you're interested in how I combat these.
Last night, as I was laying in my bed trying to sleep, my OCDemon was like, "I'm going to ruin this bitch's whole life". I knew, I just knew that a car or low flying plane or something was going to crash through my bedroom window and game-end me right then and there. That is extremely unlikely to happen for multiple reasons I don't think I even need to enumerate to people whose brains don't hate them, but I was so sure it was going to happen and I was going to die.
I fought it the way I've been taught. Facts and logic, baby. "My bedroom does not face the road". Check. "In order for a plane to hit my house, they'd have to be flying so low that I would hear it coming and have time to respond in some way". Check. "I need to sleep. I have work tomorrow and there's nowhere else for me to sleep. I have to be here." Check.
It didn't work right away. It never does. I had to keep going over and over it in my head while forcing my body to lie still. At this point, the fight or flight mode had already kicked in. I was shaking, feeling irritable, feeling scared, heart beating super fast and skipping beats, sweating, all your classic physical symptoms. I wanted to get up and get as far away from that bed as I could, but I held myself down. I kept repeating the facts. "You're not in any danger. Nothing is coming through that window."
Eventually, I relaxed enough to sleep but it must have been fitful. I don't remember anything because I was zonked out but I woke up to my sheets and pillows halfway on the floor so I must have thrashed around like a dying fish all night.
I am exhausted and I'm still feeling a heightened sense of anxiety, but it's way more manageable right now. I just keep wanting to check the news which is unfortunately an OCD compulsion of mine whenever I'm feeling anxious because I guess my brain wants a reason to be anxious. Wouldn't ya know it, this shitty world loves to give it those reasons. Lucky me. I am fighting it as much as I can. My rule is no checking more than twice a day (I will literally do it hundreds of times during a bad flareup) and if it gets too bad, I have to text my therapist. I'd rather not bother him off-hours so this means I'm fighting my existential dread with my fear of being a nuisance lmao.
This is rough and anyone else going through this, I am right there with you. It sucks not being able to trust your own thoughts. It sucks having to fight your own body. If I had a cure, we'd all be fucking cured right now. But all I have is an arsenal of techniques that work just barely at best and not at all at worst. All you can do is keep fighting.
I need a nap.
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ptsd-phoenix · 5 months
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I will share some helpful things that I use to deal with my trauma, dissociation and flashbacks.
For me it helps to recite what year it is, what the date is, what location I am at, what my name is, what my age is, which other people may or may not be around me, and to keep repeating no harm is currently being done to me. It also helps to repeat reasons as for what proof I have that it isn't or can't easily happen. Such as: I have my phone in my hand to call the police if something happens now. or: my door is locked and I live in a different house and they don't know my address. I usually tend to hold my own hand and squeeze it reassuringly, pet it or even go as far as to hug myself or gently tap the side of my thighs when walking. I try to sort of gently brush my hair sometimes while saying reassuring things to myself. Usually it's just 'I'm safe, nothing bad is happening' over and over again.
I also am in the process of making bracelets and key chains that have the current year on it and 'you are safe, just breathe' on them. so that I can look at them if I have a flashback outside of my house.
Sometimes when I'm really afraid I just curl up hugging my plushie and I imagine a character from my favourite show shows up in the flashback to save me and fight the abuser/make them not be a danger to me anymore. Or take me away to a safe place where I'm protected. Sometimes it helps to imagine revenge, but most of the time the focus is safety. So I will imagine my abuser's hands are tied up, or that I lock him behind a door in a different room. I then imagine myself being comforted. I (or the character) sort of comfort my younger self if that makes any sense.
Grounding techniques help you come to the present reality instead of floating away to your past memories. The most common one is the 5,4,3,2,1 method. Say to yourself out loud or inside your thoughts 5 things that you can hear around you, 4 things you can see, 3 things you can touch, 2 things you can smell and one thing you can taste. You can also name more of each.
You can also pick something up near you and focus on the texture of it, the weight it has, whether it's hot or cold to the touch, the colour, the sound it might make as you let it touch something else. Or if you have something edible around you you can try and really focus on the textures and the taste of it. (helpful things would be menthol gum or something spicy/sour as this will really sort of jolt you out of a dissociated state. but it can also be something really sweet or a fruit with a strong smell such as oranges. In the case of an orange you could also focus on how to peel it and focus on the different textures of that) You can also do this holding a piece of ice and focus on it melting.
If you need a distracting mental exercise you can try counting backwards from 100 to zero subtracting by a number such as 3 or 7. You can also try listing things from a certain category from a to z. So book titles or animals or even just fruits.
There's also the box breathing exercise. It's probably best to google that one rather than I try and explain it. There's also the 4-7-8 breathing technique. And a technique called the butterfly hug.
Also a more vulnerable coping technique that touches on body memories. Is I put on multiple layers of clothes. I tend to do this especially if I have to go to bed. I will put on 3 layers of underwear or sometimes even like a period pad. Then tight fitting leggings or something. For me it helps that I can feel the fabric is covering me tightly against my body. I need that barrier to be there to give me a sense of protection. It really helps when I feel 'exposed'. I can also just wear double underwear on bad days when I go work because nobody can see it but it gives me an extra sense of safety. I tend to wear boxers so it covers more of my skin.
I also have put together a 'grounding box' which is full of distracting and sensory stimulating things. There's a book in it where I have to connect the dots to create pictures. There's some comfort pictures and items in it that make me feel safe (such as my favourite animals and my favourite colours). There's a lot of fidget and stim toys in it that make me use my tactile senses (poppits, infinity cubes, slime, soft things) but also my visual (things with falling glitter, lights) or my hearing. I especially use this one trick. It requires 'Baoding balls'. I discovered that the ringing/chime sound they make has me focus on it in such a specific way that it really grounds me, or at least calms me down. I shake one ball next to my right ear and the other next to my left ear and kinda alternate between them. (I think I was probably inspired by EMDR to do this) The fact I have to move my hand in a specific way to make the actual sound happen, combined with it sort of vibrating and echoing and fading and being so close to my ear, as well as it alternating between both sides of my body has me focus on it in such a way that it calms me down from flashbacks a lot and brings me back to my room. I also use scented candles and I try to buy the ones that have a mixed scent so that I have to focus on trying to figure out what I'm actually smelling. so for example buying 'tropical sunset' and then it's up to me to smell the individual pineapple, coconut, lemon, etc.
I also express a lot of emotion in art such as poetry/singing or drawing/painting. I tend to sing in my shower and car really loudly because it feels like a private space for me. I also used to do an exercise in the shower where I washed every part of my body by really focusing on it and then thanking it. So I started either at the top or bottom and very gently massaging it with soap as I thanked it for doing what it did for me. (like, thanks toes for making me able to stand upright, or thanks hair for protecting me from sunburn on my scalp)
I also express a lot of emotion by moving my body to music and really listening to the lyrics. Dancing just by yourself can really express emotions.
I also have a pet dog that I can lie next to. I will put my head on his chest and listen to his heartbeat/breathing as well as pet him. Feeling a warm comforting presence helps with feeling safer. He is not a service dog but I find that outside when I walk him he also helps guide me the right directions as he usually follows the same roads and he ends up bringing me home when I'm dissociated. I also feel safer with him next to me when I walk outside.
This is not by any means all of my coping techniques but it's a large sum of it. They're likely my most frequently used ones.
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waterlilyrose · 1 year
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Kanthony + 45
45. “Tell me a secret.”
(Canon Divergence)
It was weird being a married man.
Anthony had imagined vaguely what it would entail when he had been interviewing the debutantes of the ton. He imagined that not very much would change - he would have his own room and the Viscountess would have hers. They would meet at the breakfast table and make pleasant chatter about his various duties and her own. They would attend events together - promenades, balls, museums, etc before going their separate ways - him to attend the gentleman's club and her to do whatever she pleased. And then, maybe once or twice a month, he would do his duty until they were able to conceive a child. An heir and a spare preferably. And then he would leave her to go about her business. He would return to having mistresses and she could take a lover if she wished - as long as no child was conceived and they were both discreet, all would be well.
The reality of married life was absolutely nothing like that. He'd never imagined his life like this. But then again he'd never imagined he would have a wife he would love as much as Kate.
They did not have separate rooms (the idea appalled him) and he did not abandon her at the first opportunity. In truth, he was probably over-eager to spend as much time with her as possible. He knew without doubt that he would never take another mistress and he was sure he would die of grief if Kate ever would (though he was confident that was a mere nightmare). And he didn't 'do his duty' when it was simply required. Anthony could become irritable if he went an hour without a kiss or a caress. And he was becoming certain that, if Kate was willing and able, he would give his own parents a run for their money with how many children he would create with Kate.
Now his viscountess was using his chest as a pillow and he was playing idly with her beautiful hair.
"Tell me a secret." Kate said.
"A secret?" Anthony questioned.
"Something that many people don't know. Or anyone actually."
"You already know everything." Anthony said. "I don't keep secrets from you. Not if I value my life anyway."
"Please?" Kate asked. Anthony sighed and thought hard. A secret... what did she not know? What was worth knowing? Well... there was one. But... what if she thought it was silly? Or unhealthy?
"I... um... every... um..."
"Go on." Kate urged. Maybe she could feel the tenseness in his torso because she stroked his chest hairs and raised herself up to look into his face. "Hey... if you really don't want to tell me, you don't have to. I just wanted-"
"No. No, it's fine. It's just... you might find me weird."
"I promise I won't. But don't tell me if it makes you uncomfortable."
Anthony looked at his wife and suddenly felt safe to tell her anything. His Kate wasn't just beautiful beyond measure - she was family orientated and had loved him despite witnessing just how much of an idiot he could be.
"I'll tell you." Anthony took a deep breath. "I... write my father letters. I couldn't talk to my mother as she was in so much pain. And my siblings were younger than me - they were depending on me because they had no-one else. I had all this pain and I didn't know what to do with it. My father had always been the one I turned to. So I turned to him then. I wrote him letters. Sometimes once a week. Sometimes once a day. Whatever was needed really - if Mother couldn't even hold Hyacinth or Colin was stealing something of mine or Eloise and Penelope had had a row I had to sort out... I told him. I wrote it all down. It didn't cure the disease but it took the edge off. I used to write it all down, read it back and then feed into the fire.
"Then on the first year anniversary, after not needing to write for a month, I wrote to him... and I kept it. I went to burn it but couldn't. I'd written about how Benedict had gotten into Oxford, Eloise had made her governess cry and Mother had started smiling again. I wanted to keep it - so I cleared out a drawer in my study desk and put the letter in there. I keep the key on me at all times.
"There are over fifty-five letters in there now. I write to him on anniversaries, special occasions and when I just badly miss him. I wrote to him when Hyacinth called me 'Papa' by accident and Mother wouldn't speak for two days. I wrote to him when Daphne was named the Diamond and later when she became the Duchess of Hastings. I wrote when Augie was born - his first grandchild. I... I sat down to write a letter before my first wedding and I couldn't write a single word. Because I was glad he wasn't there - and I'd never felt that before. But I wrote to him afterwards. When it had been called off and I'd kissed you for the first time. I told him the truth - how relieved I was, how sorry I felt for the pain I had caused and how I would never kiss another woman in my life after kissing you. I wrote to him when you had your accident. I wrote when you woke up. I wrote when you said you would marry me. And I wrote when you did.
"I used to write because I was in pain. Now I write because I want him to know my joy. And I know I should stop because maybe it's healthier and I should let him rest. But if it was me... I think I'd want to know about how my son was coping.
"Is that... weird?"
Anthony had been staring at the canopy above their bed as he had told his story. Now he finally looked at Kate. And was shocked and alarmed to see that her face was damp.
"No." She croaked. "It's not weird at all. I think he'd want to know. And I think he does know."
Anthony pulled Kate close and for a long time they just focused on getting their breathing under control.
"Do you have... any secrets to tell me?" Anthony asked eventually.
Kate nodded haltingly. "Yes, I think so."
"Well?"
Kate breathed in and sat up to look into his face again. "I think... you may need to write your father another letter."
Anthony blinked. "About what?"
"About his second grandchild coming soon."
Anthony did write a letter the next day. As soon as the physician had left after confirming Kate's suspicions and she had expressed a desire to rest, he went to his study and got out a fresh piece of paper. He must have covered five sheets of paper, front and back, by the time he was finished and sealed the letter with a wax stamp like always.
Not that it was necessary - Kate's confidence that his father knew it all soothed him. Edmund Bridgerton had never really left - he'd just gone on ahead. The letters had always been more for Anthony than his late father.
Anthony didn't think Edmund would mind.
Send Me A Pairing And A Number And I'll Write You A Drabble
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schizodiaries · 9 months
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super easy self-care tips
There are plenty of self-care articles online, but I wanted to focus on easier and simpler self-care methods for mentally ill people like me with low energy/motivation or who have a hard time managing daily life.
Drink some tea — Tea can not only soothe you, it can hydrate you as well. I personally like teas that help reduce anxiety like chamomile tea, lavender tea, or rose tea.
Cuddle a stuffed animal — Even if you’re an adult, a stuffed animal can be great for your mental well-being. They can help ease loneliness, provide comfort, and heal your inner child.
Chair yoga — Don’t let the idea of yoga scare you, you can do it while sitting! There are many mental health benefits to yoga, such as relieving stress and improving focus. Search “chair yoga” on YouTube for some guided yoga exercises.
Sit in sunlight — You can do this outside or indoors next to a window. A few minutes of basking in sunlight helps boost your mood.
Step on grass — I know “touch grass” is often used as a snarky comeback, but seriously, feeling the grass beneath your feet can release endorphins. If you find this gross or don’t like the sensation, you can try stepping on a soft rug instead.
Pet an animal — Do you own any pets? Running your hands through their fur can lower stress and anxiety, and it also makes for a good grounding exercise.
Use hand sanitizer — It’s easy to neglect hygiene when you’re in a rut. But it’s important to keep our hands clean to reduce the spread of germs. Use some hand sanitizer, they’re less harsh on your hands than soap and water, and they smell nice.
Clean up your inbox — Unsubscribe to any mailing lists you’re not interested in, and delete any old emails you no longer need. Even just five minutes of cleaning up your inbox will take a weight off your shoulders.
Use a rocking chair — If you own a rocking chair, using one can release endorphins that promote relaxation, improve sleep, and boost your mood. They’re also good for stimming.
Doodle — You don’t have to be an artist to doodle. You can doodle anything from stick figures to scribbly lines. Doodling can help reduce stress and regulate emotions, and you might even make something you like!
Take photos — Try to take regular photos of yourself, friends/family, pets, food, surroundings, anything special to you. That way you can stop to appreciate life and have fond memories to look back on.
Aromatherapy — If you own a diffuser, you can use essential oils to promote relaxation and manage anxiety. You can also mix them with lotion or a carrier oil and massage it on your skin for extra relaxation.
Breathing exercises — When your stress or anxiety levels are high, even just one minute of deep and steady breathing can help keep those levels under control.
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The Owl House: Hunter's Gloves
Hey! Have you noticed that, throughout Season 2 of The Owl House (and also in the last episode of Season 1), we have never ONCE seen Hunter without his gloves?
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I mean, he doesn't even take them off in his own room. Not even while petting Flapjack.
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You can't even justify it as him wearing it just because it's part of his Golden Guard uniform. Because even after he had run away from Belos and was hiding at Hexide...
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And even after he joined the CATS rebel group, he STILL wears them (even if he wears little else from his old uniform)...
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Buuuuuuuttttt, while he still wears gloves at the beginning of Thanks to Them...
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After that lovely intro tho, where we KNOW quite a bit of time has passed...
LOOK!
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He finally took his gloves OFF! (And, for that matter, he does not wear as many layers of clothing as he did in the previous season either, but the gloves are more noticeable.)
Now, as to why I'm making such a big deal of it...
The thing is, wearing a lot of layers, or gloves, or jackets, all the time (or even a mask all the time) is often related to anxiety and/or trauma. Wearing heavy clothes (or layers), or covering yourself up as much as possible, can help give a sense of safety when you don't feel safe (think of what a weighted blanket does for anxiety and then imagine how it would feel to wear one all the time).
For some, it's like being encased in a hug. A hug you put yourself in on top of that, which helps give you a sense of control when your circumstances in life feel out of your control. (Sometimes it's even the texture of the fabric, which, for people who soothe through touch, can be a powerful calming technique.)
Some like layers and gloves and socks -- even while not weather-appropriate -- because it feels protective, like you can hide in them. Just like those who wear a lot of black to subconsciously give themselves a sense of safety and control, to hide and blend into the background.
Of course, looked at randomly, these things can just be personal preferences too; it doesn't have to be a mental health coping mechanism.
But, this is Hunter we're talking about. And look at the consistency of him wearing gloves and layers. But, after a while in the Human World, away from Belos and living with his friends and Camila, he is obviously much more comfortable and feels safer.
It's like Gus pointed out: He's happy here. And while that comment makes Hunter immediately worry and move to placate Gus, it doesn't change the fact that it's the truth. He's happy. He feels safer than he ever has before. And, while the symptoms of anxiety and complex PTSD still linger, they are much improved -- because he is safe and happy. (I'm sorry, I can't say that enough! I'm so happy he got some time to be safe and happy for the first time in his life!)
I LOVE this show! I LOVE how the writers, artists, and animators have added these wonderful, insightful little details!!! <3
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schizopositivity · 1 year
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rainytownturtle · 9 months
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things???
one of my favorite things to do when I start getting overwhelmed or overstimulated or underestimated: anyways when something feels off and everything is becoming too much; is to try and deprive my senses as much as possible (low light, headphones, door closed) and put a comfortable hoodie or just wrap myself in a safe material (blanket; could be weighted) and just try and recharge. Put on a really good stim song with a lot of vocals and magical musical elements and just press the headphones against my ears to more fully submerge in the music; become the notes and waves and colors... pure ecstasy.
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zippyzstuff · 2 years
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serenityquest · 5 months
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Anxiety has become a common struggle for many individuals. Amidst the chaos of daily life, finding ways to manage anxiety is crucial for maintaining overall well-being. One effective approach is through individual counseling, where personalized techniques can be tailored to address specific needs and challenges. Through guided sessions, individuals can learn the power of mindfulness and how it can be applied in their daily lives to alleviate anxiety.
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