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moistmailman · 5 years

Text

Gods and Godesses AU

*A fatigued Pyrrha is on the battle field, bleeding out and wheezing as she kneels out from exhaustion while a man with an axe is approaching her*

Bandit, raising his axe: So this is what the famous Knight Nikos is capable of? I must say, Im disappointed.

Pyrrha, internally: Damn it, is this how going to die? Being out sword by a group of bandits? I can't even see straight right now. My body is so weak, I can't move an inch. I can't believe I'm going to die here.

Bandit: *Starts to bring his axe down on Pyrrha*

Pyrrha: *Raises her sword and closes her eyes in anticipation, praying to God that she will be able to block this*

*5 seconds passes*

Pyrrha, slowly opening her eyes:......huh? What the?

Bandit: *Not moving a muscle*

Pyrrha: What the? What the heck is going on—

*Pyrrha looks around to notice that the entire bandit army wasnt moving a muscle, as if they were frozen*

Pyrrha, baffled: What the heck is goi—

*Suddenly a bright light appears before her, causing her to shield her eyes*

???: Knight Nikos! It is not your time to die today!

Pyrrha, opening her eyes: Whose there—.........o-oh my God.

*Standing before Pyrrha is a tall blonde man with blue eyes and blue armor, holding a battle flag in hand*

Pyrrha, stuttering: Y-youre....you're....oh my gods, you're the god of rejuvenation!

Jaune, smiling: That is correct. I've been watching you for a while, my brave Knight.

Pyrrha, still weak: You have?

Jaune, nodding: I have. But before we get into that, allow me to do something real quick.

*Jaune waves his hand at Pyrrha, causing her wounds to heal*

Pyrrha, gasping: Oh my gods. They're gone. I'm healed! You really are the god of rejuvenation!

Jaune: Yes I am. But this is nothing special. Any god can do that to a human, but they can't do anything close to what I can do. You haven't even seen my full potential yet. Now, I have a question to ask yo—

*Suddenly another bright light appears, causing Pyrrha to shield her eyes once more before seeing a short woman dressed in red with silver eyes appear before her*

Pyrrha, in shock: Oh my god.

???: Knight Nikos! It is not your time to die to— wait a minute! What are you doing here!?

Pyrrha:......what?

Jaune, annoyed at the short woman: What am I doing here!? What are YOU doing here!? Go away Ruby! This is my champion!

Pyrrha, choking: Ruby!? As in the goddess of speed Ruby! That Ruby!?

Ruby, smiling: Yes, that is me. And with my help you will be abl—

Jaune: NO! Stop it right now! I was here first, now butt out!

Pyrrha:....w-what's going on?

Ruby, cutely stomping her foot: No! That's not fair! You knew I had my eyes on Pyrrha for a while! She's going to be my champion, not yours!

Pyrrha, choking: Champion!? You two want me to be your—

Jaune: No she's not, Ruby!

Ruby: Is too!

Pyrrha, awkwardly: G-guys, can yo-

Jaune: IS NOT!

Ruby, sticking out her tongue: IS TOO!

Jaune: OH REAL MATURE! HOW OLD ARE YOU!?

Ruby: 2168!

Jaune: REALLY?! CAUSE YOU LOOK 10!

Ruby, blushing: S-SHUT UP! NO I DONT! I HAVE YOU KNOW THAT I LOOK LIKE A BEAUTIFUL 19 YEAR OLD WOMAN!

Jaune: Your height says 10.

Ruby, puffing out her cheeks: WHY OUGHTA! *Starts trying to hit Jaune, just for him to keep her at bay with his hand*

Pyrrha:....what......what is going on? Am I slowly dying and having a weird dream from my blood loss?

Jaune, chuckling: You can’t get to me because you’re so short! Ha!

Ruby, trying to. Real through: SHUT UP YOU BIG JER—

*Suddenly ANOTHER white light appears, this time a bulk blonde woman with purple eyes and revealing clothing to show off her muscles appears*

Jaune, groaning: OH WHAT NOW!?

???: Knight Nikos! It is not—

Ruby: OH NOT YOU TOO! GO AWAY YANG!

Yang: Wait, Ruby!? Is that you!?

Ruby: Yes, it is! And you are too late to make Pyrrha your champion, because she's mine!

Jaune: No she's not! She's my champion!

Pyrrha, wide eyed:......h-hold up, i-is this the goddess of strength!?

Yang, winking: It sure is. And I have had my eyes on you for a while now.

Pyrrha: Oh my gods. Is this a fever dream!? Is this really happening?! Am I really in the presence of two goddesses and a god?

Yang: You sure are, sweetheart. And let me tell you something. Your fighting skills are awesome. I'm really impressed. And don't even get me started on your muscles. Mwah. They are a beauty.

Pyrrha, blushing: O-oh uh...thank you.

Yang: Youre welcome, gorgeous. Now anyway, I have a question for yo—

Jaune: FOR GODS SAKE! THIS IS MY CHAMPION!

Yang: Oh blow it out your ass, Jaune!

Ruby: Yeah! Blow it out of your butt!

Jaune: I WAS HERE FIRST!

Yang: Nobody cares!

Pyrrha, awkwardly: H-hey guys, y-you really shouldn’t argu—

*Suddenly another bright light appears, before a short white hair woman appears in front of them*

???: Knight Nikos! It is not your time to—

Yang, groaning: Oh great. Miss no fun is here too. This is about to become unbearable!

???, repulsed: What the!? What are you guys doing here?!

Yang: Same thing as you, Weissy!

Weiss, angrily: Do not call me Weissy!

Pyrrha, head spinning: T-that’s the goddess of i-ice! That’s the goddess of ice! The goddess of ice is standing right in front of me!

Yang, rolling her eyes: Yeah, she sure is. And she’s a cold hearted bit—

Ruby: Language!

Yang, rolling her eyes: She’s a piece of work. There, happy Ruby?

Ruby: Yep.

Weiss, sternly: Look, I don’t know who you guys think you are, but Pyrrha is going to be my champion! Got that!? I have had my—

Jaune: “Eyes on her for awhile.” Yeah, we all have! But I was the first God here, so all of you go away!

Weiss, grimacing: I don’t even consider you as a god, Jaune. So I don't even know why you are here.

Yang: Ooooooooh, damn.

Jaune: GODS DAMN IT! EVERYONE GET OUT OF HE—

*Yet ANOTHER bright light appears again*

Pyrrha: Oh my gods! How many are going to show up!?

???: Knight Nikos! It—

Yang, waving: Oh, hi Blakey!

Blake: Yang!? What in the world are yo— wait, Weiss, Ruby, Jaune!? What are you doing here!?

Ruby: Same thing as you! We all want Pyrrha to be our champion as well.

Blake: Are you kidding me!?

Jaune: Nope. We all want to bestow our powers on her.

Yang: And Honestly, why are you here anyway? You're the goddess of sneaking. What the hell can you do for her in this situation?

Pyrrha: *In the background trying to wrap her head around the fact that 4 goddesses and a god are with her* Uhhhhhhhhh

Blake, offended: What is that supposed to mean!? I can help her so much in this battle! I can help her sneak away from everyone unharmed.

Yang: So you will make her a coward, is what you're implying?

Blake, angrily: No! I will make her fight another day! That is what I can do! Fight smart, not stupid!

Yang, nodding: Hmm hmm, that's cool and all, but I will be able to make her kill every single one of these assholes with her barehands. So I'm pretty sure I'm the best choice for her here!

Ruby, crossing her arms: Nuh uh! I will be able make her zoom around everyone and take them all out under a second! So I'm obviously the best choice for her!

Weiss: That is prosperous! I will be able to make her freeze everyone here solid! And she will be able survive even the coldest depths of hell with my powers! I'm the best choice!

Pyrrha: Guys seriously, please stop—

Yang: Its summer, dipshit! It's like 80 degrees out!

Weiss: Why you littl—

Jaune: I can literally make her unkillable! She will not be able to die with my powers bestowed upon her!

Yang, sarcastically: Wow, that sounds so amazing! You hear that, Pyrrha. With Jauney's help you will be able to get tortured none stop without the relief of death. Doesn't that just sound amazing?

Weiss: Its honestly better than being a damn brute like you.

Jaune: Ha! Thanks Weiss.

Weiss: Shut up, I still don't respect you.

Jaune: OH COME ON! I WAS HERE FIRST!

Ruby: LOOK, SHES GOING TO BE MY CHAMPION AND THATS FINAL!

Yang: NO SHES NOT! SHES MINE!

Jaune: I WAS HERE FIRST! SO SHE'S MINE!

Weiss: NOBODY CARES, JAUNE! BESIDES, SHE WOULD MUCH RATHER HAVE ME INSTEAD! IM THE BEST CHOICE!

Blake: NO! I WOULD BE THE BEST CHOICE FOR HER!

Pyrrha, mumbling: Are they actually fighting over me. This reminds me of all the boys when I was a teenager.....*starts blushing from the thought*

RWBYJ: *RABBLE RABBLE RABBLE RABBLE*

Pyrrha: G-guys.....

RWBYJ: *RABBLE RABBLE RABBLE RABBLE*

Pyrrha: Guys.

RWBYJ: *RABBLE RABBLE RABBLE RABBLE*

Pyrrha: GUYS!

RWBYJ: What!?

Pyrrha, awkwardly: Uh...well uhm.....do all of you guys really want me to be your champion? Like me?

RWBYJ: *nods*

Pyrrha, blushing: Oh my gods. I h-honestly can’t even.....comprehend any of this. This is all happening so fast. I don’t even know what to do.

Weiss: You can start by picking one of us.

Yang: Which obviously going to be me.

Ruby: Nuh uh! It’s going to be me!

Jaune: Are you guys forgetting that I’m the first one here?

Yang: I wAs ThE fIrSt OnE HeRe.

Jaune: My gods! You’re as mature as your sister!

Yang: YoU aRe As MaTuR—

Jaune: WILL YOU SHUT THE HELL UP!?

RWBYJ: *RABBLE RABBLE RABBLE RABBLE*

Pyrrha: GUYS STOP ARGUING!

RWBYJ: Sorry....

Pyrrha, awkwardly: Okay look, I don’t really know how to choose. I-I mean, this is a lot to take in all of a sudden. I thought I was about to die not even 5 minutes ago....or at least, it would be five minutes ago if Jaune didn’t stop the time suddenly.

Jaune, smiling: I saved her by the way. Just saying.

Weiss: Shut up.

Pyrrha: So my mind is all....wacky right now, and I can’t decide. So could we maybe....I don’t know.....could I just be all of your guys’ champion? O-or is that against the rule of something?

RWBYJ:.........

Pyrrha, blushing: I-I sorry, I just really don't like arguments is all. Nobody usually wins with them, and they always leave people in a bad mood. A-and I will feel bad if I choose one and leave the others depressed and all. B-because you did come all the way out of your way to help me. S-so how about I just be all of your champion? S-so everyone will be happy?

RWBYJ:..........

Pyrrha: I-I just want to make everyone happy, and that’s it. I-I promise. I-I’m sorry if my suggestion offends any of you, because that’s not my intentions at all.

RWBYJ:........

Yang: Do we even have a rule book?

Weiss: No, we don’t.

Yang: Really? Hmm.........

*two minutes later time unfreezes and the bandit swings his axe down, just for it to hit the dirt*

Bandit: What the hell!? Where did she go!? It's like she just disappeared in a shado— GARK!

*Abruptly all of the bandits were quickly killed off by a red blur, some of them being frozen solid, some of them being thrown 30 feet in the air*

Pyrrha, appearing out of nowhere covered in blood: *Panting*

RWBYJ: *Appear out of nowhere*

Yang:......well, we just made an unstoppable killing machine.

Jaune: Yeah, we did.

Pyrrha: *passes out from exhaustion*

Yang: Dibs at carrying her~

RWBJ: Dib on— dang it!

Yang, picking Pyrrha up: Haha! Too slow!

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cleaduvalls · 5 years

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i watched “spy kids” 4 times in 1 week and here are my thoughts

carmen your nightgown is like 200 years old, get a new one

you clearly know this story by heart, you’re saying parts of it. why are you questioning what “take him out” means

a double wig should be more obvious than that

we can see that that’s a glass elevator. people can see you changing, ingrid

nice hat

why did you kill the swan

is that paul rudd???????

how are jets ripping pages out of a book

heart shaped parachutes shouldn’t be working that well

why is there a guitar on your bed. how do you sleep

i think the kids would have seen the track in the floor at SOME point

why is there a jungle gym in their house. i know they’re spies but who has a jungle gym.... in their HOUSE

carmen you’re a frog

i think juni just legitimately try to kill carmen

why are both parents going to school. is that like, a Thing????

juni how do you do that

who puts a video screen in the front seat

hey look its floop. love that guy

they’re not picking on you for the bandages, it’s cuz you brought the toys OUTSIDE your backpack. always put them inside. trust me

did his mirror just.... zoom in?????

h*ck yeah beat him up greg

do all the other kids hate him too??????

dang that hurt

“chief” that’s so white

stupid kid. his dads a spy

that floop doll isn’t even close to accurate

hey look its floop again. love that dude

Big Willy Wonka Energy

oooh skipping numbers i see. love that

why do the subtitles have “mr. floop” as his name. its just floop, yall

“sometimes in order to think big you have to think small” pretty inspirational tbh

oh hes fidgeting!!!!!! love that

woah what are you doing this is rated pg ingrid

i wish my uncles would tell me im shrinking. they just make small talk abt school 😔

this gradenko lady looks like jan from the office

hey its floop again!!!!! love that dude

yes juni. its a fire drill in your own home

these dudes have a jungle gym AND a pool. what the h*ck

why did you pull off your mustache to prove you’re not related. if anything that makes you more related. greg does that too

why did he put the mustache back ON

where did those boats come from

carmen says manual weird. man-yull

right, cuz adrenaline causes warts

“don’t touch anything” *immediately touches everything*

basic boat ettiquette: don’t shit in the boat. those toilets can’t handle anything

is that globe..... punched in???????

floop!!!!!!! love that dude

feet on the desk????? i dunno seems pretty gay

since when did carmen get keys to that

i might be wrong but i dont think thats every country

what does pressure have to do with positioning a laser

this floor is the best mechanic in the whole movie. reminds me of a richie rich comic i had as a kids

why did they not run into the wall. i wanted to see that

is the slide there when floop films his show????

HEY ITS FLOOP!!!! love that dude

theres a bunch of normal food like.... sour worms. why did they pick the slime from charlie and the chocolate factory when johnny depp finds the oompa loompas

thats a sick coat. best one in the movie

that was a good snap. nice acoustics

God what a power move. something thanos would say

listen floop i love you but thats not how you say research

fELIX NO

and hes gone. cool

did she kick the camera?????

haha author unknown. cuz hes a spy

why did you take that one specifically????? plot convenience????

he can still be a spy, just not a good one. learn to read

is that supposed to be a question?????

FUN FACT if you listen closely when carmen says “like felix said” you can hear a weird cut in “said”, almost like its a new clip

theres no keyhole

i think juni can read. why are you spelling it

did you have the floop toys in your pocket????

OKAY THIS SCENE WHERE THEY PLAY IT BACKWARDS?????? THAT MESSED ME UP AS A KID

what do those things do?????

i can feel the pain from the fan blades

how did that break the chain????

why would you annouce that. they can hear you. just because they’re thumbs doesn’t mean they’re deaf

that’s a thing, not a place

FLOOP!!!!! ON A BILLBOARD!!!! love that dude

how are you slipping. shes holding YOU

YOU DROPPED HIM GENIUS

how do people not notice the jetpack dudes

DOES NO ONE CARE THAT CLOTHES WERE STOLEN

that’s a cute coat

why is the lady cool with carmen just... doing that

HEY I LOVE THIS SONG!!!!!!!!! AND THAT DUDE!!!!!

ofc you can’t think “straight enough” you’re gay

why is mexico sepia tone

when do you think juni had time to change and learn a new language

IF IT HURTS TO HIT HIM, S T O P

i wanna be on that merry-go-round

HOW DO YOU K N O W THAT HIS CODE NAME. WHY “MUST” IT BE HOMBRE

i love how junis just like “we already got a fake uncle”

LOOK AT HOW FLOOP IS SITTING!!!!!!!! THATS GAY!!!!!!! HE IS A HOMOSEXUAL!!!!!!!!

ALSO MORE FLOOP!!!! say it with me, LOVE THAT DUDE!!!!!!!!!!

minion looks like barry from friends

wait i lied this coat is better

we DO have uncles like that!!!!!

if your inventions are so good why is your font so BORING

hey wait carmen said that. hmmmmmmmm 🤔🤔🤔

glowsticks dont help you see like at all

the map looks like gallifreyan but its not. spy kids is older than the doctor who reboot

they go ZOOM

THATS NOT HOW YOU SAY MANUAL!!!!!!!

great job carmen YOU wrecked the plane

WHATS A REGULATOR

oh its just a breathing thing

haha pee joke. funney

where are the brains coming from???? that factory is Not Correct

if i were juni i would look back over all the floop’s fooglies tapes and see what the agents were saying backwards. once the mission was done, ofc

it took me like 5 minutes to figure out what sknaht meant the first time

SEE THIS MECHANIC IS GOOD BC NOW THERES NO PLEXIGLASS

WHY DOES NO ONE RUN INTO THE WALL

F L O O P I S G O D

love that dude

you discussed with the spy parents that juni watched the show. he just told you that you took his parents. you KNOW this is juni, why are you surprised that he watches it????? you already know!!!!!!

tbh i kinda want some of those colorful chains. they’d look cool somewhere

haha voice crack

no wonder your shows not doing well. those are awful times

why is there a sexy thumb nurse. why did floop make the thumb nurse sexy

use her first name?????? you’re clearly dating

!!!!!! THEY USED THE SAME TOOL MULTIPLE TIMES!!!!!! UNHEARD OF!!!!!!!

he cares so much about this show!!!!!! its so sweet!!!! love that dude

YEP THIS COAT IS BETTER, LOOKS A M A Z I N G IN A RUNNING SCENE

haha you killed carmen

ok this scene with the acid crayon is like my absolute favorite. something about using a crayon to escape and then floop (love that dude) opening the door a second later and then doing a double take. FAVE

wheres belize

ok so apparently its a country by mexico

no you CANT tell her you need to ESCAPE

we finally got a clean outside shot of the castle.... that place is wack

haha minion can’t sit in the hand chair correctly because hes STRAIGHT what a loser

hey juni HOW DO YOU DO THAT

minion you know what the robot costumes look like AND what juni looks like. dont be stupid

what..... what do you want carmen for, exactly, minion??????

floop is supportive of others’ art!!!!!!!!!!! love that dude

HE SAID “WHERE’S MOM AND DAD” LIKE THEY’RE HIS OWN PARENTS THAT’S SO C U T E

ALSO ANOTHER SCENE WITH THE GREAT RUNNING COAT

he says doppelganger beautifully

“its too late” that timing was BEAUTIFUL

you COULD take 500 brains out if you just TRIED HARDER. still love that dude

his control panel has buttons that spell “floop”

WHY CAN MINION TALK NORMAL

if its reversible why do you have it in later movies

carmen fights fake juni and juni fights fake carmen because they didnt have the fancy clone (?) technology

THREE TIMES!!!!!! THEY USED THE SAME TOOL T H R E E T I M E S THIS HAS NEVER BEEN SEEN BEFORE!!!!!!!!!!!

nice censorship

HOW DID MACHETE SMASH ONLY THE CLEAR WINDOWS AND A L L THE CLEAR WINDOWS THERE ARE NO MORE CLEAR WINDOWS!!!!!! ANYWHERE!!!!!

wow nice 3 buttons thats totally how you hack

oh look they have all died

oh. guess not :((

machete you better rip off your mustache

HES GOING TO JUNIS LEVEL TO TALK TO HIM!!!!!!! HE RUFFLED HIS HAIR!!!!!!!!! HES GONNA MAKE A GREAT DAD!!!!!!!

wow no shit ingrid

did he leave his wart bandaid on the kitchen counter?????

ALAN CUMMING!!!! ON A CEREAL BOX!!!!

ok CLEARLY other people watch floop’s show, he’s rated number 2. kids at the school are gonna recognize juni and carmen. they better get popular

is that george clooney

well that’s not how it works in spy kids 2. or 3. or 4. or the tv show

#this took like 2 hours #spy kids #spy kids spoilers #spoilers #juni cortez #carmen cortez #ingrid cortez #gregorio cortez #minion #fegan floop #floops fooglies #sk1 #robert rodriguez

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alchemist-shizun · 5 years

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As expected, Dealing with intrusive thoughts is now one of my favorites

Here I come with almost all of my reactions on the episode, even though I tagged the spoiler warnings I put everything under the cut just in case. Enjoy the emotional rollercoaster while I'll probably go and rewatch it again.

Okay kinda expected one or two of the warnings but all of them together what is gonna happen???? (Though they make sense after reading the title)

HELLO FRESH BACK AGAIN

"I'm awesome and I can do this" there goes my boy. *said boy falls flat on the floor* ...come on

I felt that yawn bc I stayed up all night waiting for the video but it dropped at 8 am, I'm an idiot who should've gotten more sleep

"help me" why is he such a mood "everything is going wrong in my life" same but YOU SHOULDN'T SAY THAT LET ME HUG YOU

They're all sinking up so fast god I missed my bois. Also the general awkwardness of Virge and Pat, greeeeat something will go wrong

Virgil just ignoring everything and touching the railing, a mood

ALSO PLEASE LET ROMAN IN THE SITUATION

SECRET SECRETS ARE NO FUN TELL ME NOW OR ELSE WE'RE DONE

wait why does Ro want to be deeply troubled- man are you okay-

LOGAN'S HERE

"your most extreme reaction is an eyebrow raise" "FALSEHOOD" "I stand corrected" omfg

"what are you ta- what are you talking- what are you talking about?" I loved that whole take it made me feel complete

"Look I barely got any sleep" this can apply to a lot of us and I love just how we're all always like "TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF" but in the end this is where we all end up anyway

Okay I'm very curious about these troubling thoughts though

"so sushi" FUCCC I DIED RIGHT THERE

"Don't act like that was an accident" "everybody, Virgil. Let's give it up for the Purp Man" these speak for themselves. Also the purp man is my new fav nickname and I'm gonna use it.

4:17 Patton is adorable bye

"if you continue to push this we're going to end up in really dangerous territory" AND THAT'S WHERE THE TENSION STARTED TO BUILD UP

great flick

"am I delirious or is this the funniest video I've ever made" I felt that

YOU HIGH-JOCKED

okay but when Thomas starts disassociating I also feel really weird like as if there was something blocking my own hearing for real?? And not just the audio edited like that?? Maybe I'm just too tired

WHAT WHO WHHH first intrusive thought making its way what is gonna happen

OH MY GOD ROMAN WATCH OUT ALSO THAT'S DEFINITELY A NEW DARK SIDE OR SMTH LIKE THAT

W HO THE FUCKLKDSL IS THAT A MOUSTACHE IS THAT GLITTER WHAT IN THE WORLD IS HE WEARING WHAT IS HE DOING THERE PLEASE- okay but he looks crazy af I like that

"-evIL" "-SHOW UP"

First time I watched the scene where Ro gets knocked out I literally just screamed "ROMAN" in a high pitched sound I was shook wtf my bOY

Patton and Thomas's yells in unison plus "YOU KILLED HIM" I just I JUST

"Ah, he's the Duke" "....... boo" AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Okay but his voice is so on point with his character portrayal he's so weird it's awesome?

SONG SONG SONG and oh goodness the visuals I can't fathom how much editing work must have gone through this, they're all so talented.

"aunt patty naked" A G AI N??

"IM GONNA WHIP YOUR BUTT"

a snaKE IT'S DECEIT oh my these silouhettes are so great this is my favorite scene

this is gonna be stuck in my head all day

THE COOL MIRROR EDIT.

god i hate him so much already but i'm super intrigued he's so chaotic the whole team made a wonderful job i'll never stop saying this

"i'm really stupid right now" just how much out of context relatable content are we going to get on this fine day?

omg the dark version of creativity, which can be associated with intrusive thoughts, that's very clever

THE JUICY STUFF DANCE

"Repression can be very bad indeed" I mean he's right tbh it leads to never solving the problem at all

GO LOGAN GO HAVE YOUR TIME TO SHINE FINALLY i missed him

"i can't hear youuuuuu" much like "I don't understand what you're saying I don't know anything about words" THE DARK SIDES ARE ALL SASSY LITTLE BITCHES

pattonnnn did a real good job

THE BRAVE HANDSOME UNBEATABLE ROMAN and mashed potatoes

"scary" and Virgil just gives Thomas a look idk I live on the little details (Im ten minutes into the vid and look how long this post already is)

GEE Remus (already using his name bc it's shorter) looking so offended at the label and then pointing out it should be a Virgil problem whAT DOES THIS MEAN IM SHAKING

WHY WOULD HE BE DECEIT AGAIN IM DYING. "Idk if you guys can tell but I'm a little silly"

"then why are you lying" no everybody I don't need angst

THE BLACK AND THE WHITE THEORY I SAW GOING AROUND good job to whoever thought of that

JOAN

the forbidden dance

INTO A BUTTHOLE WHAT IS IT WITH HIM AND BUTTHOLES

there u go thomas said it too

haters gonna hate hate hate hate hate FHDSLAKLFD

irresponsible parenting, Logan completing the parental unit of the sides

"maybe there's hope for you after all!" me looking at all my wips

REMUS' LAUGH IS PERFECT. also "BITCH WHAT IS *YOUR* DEAL"

"you've never been one to soften the truth" OH BOI HERE WE GO

"do we have some case of brain swap???" I legitly said "maybe" in unison with Patton the first time

Vee pls stop putting Thommy boy down he's having a bad time

Logan trying to put some sense into the situation is my only spark of hope for this to turn back good

REMUS IS SO DRAMATIC

That lick was ....... let's pretend it never happened

"you know who can help us with that???" DECEIT'S SONG COMING UP that was great, imagine the chaos that the duo would create

"THATS WHAT REPRESSION IS?"

gasp Remus trying to make Virgil angry at Logan shall not stand DON'T PUT THEM AGAINST ONE ANOTHER HE'S JUST TRYING TO HELP

"you all are not listening to Thomas" this is the development I needed

"you're just para-" and he cuts himself. You all know what I'm talking about. Foreshadowing probably? This happened too back then when Roman was almost calling him the same. And then Virge looks so hurt I- "thank you for being on guard" that made me want to cry idk

the whole speech Logan gave? Pure gold. That was perfect.

HE SAID FIGURATIVELY *CLAP CLAP CLAP*

"UH RECORD SCRATCH?"

"does this make me cool?" djslagrkglhf also the teeth thing right after what the

... the deodorant eating ...

DUKEY

The first time I watched I thought his name was spelled Remis that's how dumb my Italian ass is

Still I love his name bc I'm a nerd for ancient culture, ESPECIALLY Roman (and ancient Greek but it isn't mentioned here) and I love the little thing they did with both Creativity names, super clever and very much liked on my part.

"I would never hide anything from you" and he looks at Virgil JUST ALL THIS FORESHADOWING

LOGAN SHOWING HIS TEETH BACK UP

"how about you shut up" Roman what the hecc man

THAT THING INTO LOGANS HEAD UNSETTLED ME A BIT

what are they doing to him today let him rest

double blow

"can we logic our way out of that?" everybody nodding was so pure

"shit"

THAT FUCKING JUMPSCARE I'M SORRY WHAT THE FU

"not all thoughts are meaningful"

He's go- no he's back again

THE CALLBACK MENTION AND PATTONS REACTION... probable foreshadowing to what Joan said about there being a part two of SvS?

"When are you actually gonna jump out of a moving car I've been bringing it up for years" so it's not just me..?

"it is okay if the thought happens to cross your mind"

"everything is okay" I'm going to cry I needed that

I love how Logan touches the topic that there is no problem in seeking help from therapists. There's a lot to say on this, but I was really glad that was pointed out since the are a lot of stereotypes on the matter

why did Virgil look like he was about to cry

Patton I love you

Thomas going to rest is what everyone wanted to see

Virgil confronting Remus I'm living you're doing amazing sweetie

"you tickle me emo"

"it was just like old times" then Pat and Lo's looks in this essay I will

ROMAAAAN

VIRGILS SMILE

"YOU'RE ALIVE"

"I LOVE YOU" ME TOO!! ME TOO ME TOO

"are you good?" "are you hurt at all?" I love when the sides look out for each other

"I'm sorry Logan" right through the heart. Another development.

I need y'all to look at Virgil in this exact second because. he.

that's my point.

All those smiles while Logan's talking are making me alive

"No seriously, you're ... really ... cool" I started tearing up right here. Twice. And then Logan sinks down cause he's not at all used to this and he's feeling t h i n g s please keep on being appreciated you deserve it

Also Patton always learning from his mistakes and understanding them when he does something wrong or he thinks in the wrong direction, that's something I think a lot of people need to learn, including myself. Like, it's okay to be wrong and make mistakes, just do your best to make sure you're improving yourself afterwards, instead of dwelling on it too much

"I don't like him" makes two of us

"Soooo you have a brother?" oh boy

The m i r r o r it's making me cry

"He's gone now and he's never coming back!" "I don't think that's-" "BYEE" what was all that talk about repression for if you contiNUE TO DO THIS ROMAN please I beg of you let us hELP YOU he's making me die inside

Oh boi the big moment. I already expected a bomb to drop since Virgil was the last one remaining.

"You okay buddy?" "Huh?" op somehow was already found crying

"I'm a little disappointed in myself" istg all that foreshadowing mixed with me wanting to hug him

The music picking up tension, this is poetic cinema let me tell you

I noticed how he calls them "the others", all these tiny details is what I'm living for

"I should know better" I couldn't beLIEVE IT, also how he seemed to be so frustrated made something inside me break

the pause and then "Because I was one of them", the music stops for a second, a little second in which you can hear my distant screaming "GOSH HE SAID IT IT WAS TRUE"

Thomas is speechless and just stares at him while the music picks up again and then Virgil's sigh and expression sinking down like "there you have it. that's the truth. and you can't do anything about it" he looks so defeated I'm breaking down.

Did I already mention poetic cinema? I just love angst and this scene was perfect

First time watching I, too, barely understood anything I was listening to in the last parte because all of that was really a lot to take in.

"Those thoughts that you may have thought do not define you"

"[the thought] may simply be that we are really okay"

"Go to bed!" me

no im not in the mood for food because for some unfathomable reason I had anxiety before the video dropped yay me

WHY ARE U DRINKING RED WINE WITH THAT DISH

GAVIN BEST BOY EVER

and last but not least: are you fucking serious Remus

THERE'S A SNAKE IN MY BUTT FANDFKJL

I didn't expect this topic at all and I am so glad it was talked about, thankfully my intrusive thoughts do not bother me as much as I realized other people's do. And I never saw anyone talking about this before, which is why it makes this video so important. I saw a tweet recently about someone saying that it is okay if you think about weird things, the important is that you never act on them, that's what makes you a good person. But I think this video really explains it far better and I never realized how common something like this was? So yeah another time in which I've been educated and couldn't be happier about it. These people really are bringing light to the world gah I LOVE THEM.

oKAY guess I'm done this was a wild ride and yeah I tend to point out EVERYTHING, so here you have it, as I already mentioned if you feel the need to geek out too, I'm here for ANYBODY! (pls I have no friends)

25 notes · View notes

sugarpun-fairy · 5 years

Text

18 - WARREN WORTHINGTON III X OC

Summary: a small thing based on the song “18″ by Anarbor but with a fluff ending

Word count: 1,407

Warnings: i almost cried writing this but its fluff so idk

A/N: SO you’re probably gonna see a lot of Graces and Maddys in here because they’re my babies and i like writing things to make them feel better

and my baby Grace deserves the world so yeah, i made this to her as a “thank you” for keeping fighting everyday

love you b @imaginesandideas

-x-

He parked the motorcycle pretty close to the school exit, knowing exactly what everyone would go out saying.

Eighteen, crazy Pulled up in your daddy's car You wanna move in with me Guess we're off to a heavy start

Should've seen this coming From a mile away Eighteen, crazy I know what you want from me I know what you want from me

Her long ginger hair swayed from one side to another, tied up in a high pony tail with a golden bow matching her red, white and golden cheerleader outfit, as she ran to greet him with a tight hug and a deep kiss. All eyes on them as the scene happened.

“How was your day baby girl?” he asked with a smile, wrapping her waist with both arms.

“Quite boring actually. Guess I should have texted you to pick me up earlier.” she pouted. “How was yours?”

“I just stayed with the boys and waited ‘til it was time to come pick you up.”

“Grace?” the girl’s sister called approaching the couple. “Warren?”

“Hey sis!” the younger sister smiled.

“Jean.” the boy nodded with his head.

“I’m going home with him today ‘kay J?” the younger ginger said biting her lower lip. “Sorry I didn’t tell you earlier.”

“It’s okay... Just be careful okay G?”

“I always am!”

“Don’t worry Jean, I’ll take care of her.”

“You better.”

So if you wanna piss off your parents Take me to scare them Show them you're all grown up If long hair and tattoos are what attract you I would've tracked you Baby then you're in luck And I know it's just a phase You're not in love with me You wanna piss off your parents, baby Piss off your parents That's alright with me

“Grace, honey, who was that boy that drove you home today?” the woman asked while serving the dinner.

“Oh, he’s my boyfriend.” Grace answered with a smile, her ginger curls moving softly as she turned to her father who had just choked on his drink.

“You left Ben to be with that boy?” the man asked harshly.

“I didn’t leave Ben. He left me.” she corrected him. “Warren is a nice guy, dad, I swear! He’s one of Scott’s friends from college.”

The sentence made the two adults turn to their older daughter in expectation of hearing a denying.

“He is. They’re not really close since Warren is closer to Alex, but he’s a nice guy” Jean defended the argument.

“I don’t like him.” the father stated.

“You don’t have to. I’m already eighteen, dad! I’m not a kid anymore! Shouldn’t you trust my decisions? Trust me? Support me?” Grace argued.

“Grace Grey, you might be eighteen...” he tried to say but the sound of her fork hitting the plate stopped him.

“Don’t even come with that ‘while you live under my roof’ thing because it’s pointless. And above anything meaningless, after all you made a person, not a puppet.” she continued.

“Don’t talk to your father like this, young lady.” her mom said in warning tone.

“Is it so hard to trust me like you trust Jean? When did I disappoint you that bad to deserve this?” she added before leaving to her room wiping a fake tear.

You know I'm broke So you pulled out your daddy's car I drink, I smoke You ended up from the very start

Should've seen this coming From a mile away I'll play your game I know what you want from me I know what you want from me

“How did they react?” he asked leaning closer to her. She smiled and shrugged.

“My dad is pissed but I threw some drama and mom came to talk to me after dinner. She said that he might not like you but she’ll give you one chance.” she quoted. He laughed.

“That’s a good sign.”

“Yes indeed.”

He leaned back against the fence and lit up a cigarette.

“Can I ask you something?” he whispered blowing a cloud of white smoke. She nodded, leaning on the fence but on the opposite side. “Do you hold any grunges against your sister?”

She bit her lip, thinking about his question. That was never something she had ever thought about. Yet he was right in thinking about that. After all she came to him, asked him to pretend to be her boyfriend only to prove her parents that she had grown, that she wasn’t a kid anymore. But there was another factor on this story: Jean.

There was something about how she was the perfect student, the perfect daughter, the perfect girlfriend to her perfect boyfriend, Scott Summers, that drove her crazy. Living on her sister’s shadow for so long was a completely acceptable reason to do what she was doing.

“Unconsciously, maybe. Jean always supported and backed me up, always...”

“If you want to give up...”

“Oh, no, I don’t. Who knows if I didn’t make all this up just to have a chance with you because I have a thing for bad boys?” she joked.

“Who knows.” he repeated with a smirk, exhaling another cloud of smoke.

So if you wanna piss off your parents Take me to scare them Show them you're all grown up If long hair and tattoos are what attract you Baby then you're in luck And I know it's just a phase You're not in love with me You wanna piss off your parents, baby Piss off your parents That's alright with me

He didn’t believe her “thing” on him would last long. But he couldn’t lie and say he didn’t like the way her hair seemed more ginger with that golden bow, or her lips met his every day after school. Or her arms around him when he drove her back home or to a date. He went to er school games just to see her cheering. At that point he just decided he would enjoy the time he had until she found some prep guy and leave him.

But the months passed and she wasn’t showing any sign that she would. The year went by and she started college but were still with him. Her parents started liking him and she kept calling him baby and sending him dorky pics while studying. Her roommate was already getting used to walk in and catch them both making out or sleeping together. She was still whispering love confessions to him while she thought he was asleep.

And that was driving him completely mad.

“Aren’t you tired of me already?” he suddenly blurted out walking in her dorm room. “Didn’t you get more freedom from your parents? Why are you still with me?” he questioned crossing his arms against his chest.

She sat in her bed, looking at him mildly scared and took a deep breath.

“I know you won’t believe me if I say that I fell for you. But I did.”

“How? How can a girl like you fall for a guy like me? You’re the perfect girl from the suburb. I’m the guy with daddy issues and smoking problems. You clearly deserve better!” With that words he realized how bad he had fallen for her as well. But he wasn’t selfish enough to keep her with him.

The room fell in silence while tears ran down her face and his.

“As the younger child I grew up learning what I wanted, needed and deserved.” she whispered. “I just never thought I would find something that would fit the three categories.”

“I’m not good enough for you Grace.” he mumbled.

“Yes, you are! And that’s why I love you! Please believe me Warren!”

“You’re too naive, baby doll.”

He turned around and walked to the door, ready to leave. The cold metal of the doorknob mixed with the sound of your sobs made him shiver. Did he really wanted to leave? Did he really wanted to do this to her and himself? Did he really wanted to throw away this chance, a chance he could never have again in his whole life?

He took a deep breath, running his finger through his blond curls and pushed the door, closing it with a bang. She screamed, scared.

“But you’re my naive baby doll.” he proclaimed making his way back to her and cupping her face. “And I love you.” he whispered drying her tears with his thumb and kissing her deeply.

-x-

taglist: @southside-sweets @batboys-and-other-messes @grandmascottlang @underoosstark @imaginesandideas

requests are OPEN but i still have a few to do so they might take some time BUT THEY WILL BE POSTED I PROMISE

and if u wanna be tagged in my next pieces just hmu

im always open to make new friends so if you wanna just talk about life hmu too

#warren worthington iii #warren worthington imagine #warren worthington x reader #warren worthington x oc #x men imagine #xmen fic #xmen #pun fairy writes #jean grey #scott summers

64 notes · View notes

echy-hexi · 5 years

Text

Me:You let a pyro have a match... What did you think she was going to do? Just light her cigarette?

My dad, almost having his eyebrows singed off:Yes

Me:...I'm disappointed

My dad:As you should be.

///

King:hey I gots a question

Me:Nani?

King:What happens when a girl takes a penis enlargement pill?

Me:...I- what?

///

Me:You're too sober Faith, go get a beer.

///

JJ:Bruh why the fuck are the staff at this funeral home crying?

Celo:Because they work at a fucking funeral home

King:But they should be used to it

Me:No mom

JJ:Yea but you'd think they'd be desensitized to it.

Me:they're paid to cry

Celo:People have emotions unlike you. Not everyone is an emotionless piece of shit.

King:Sympathy

JJ:I'm not an emotionless piece of shit, you're confusing me with Faith

Me:lmao

///

JJ:It looks like Satan's cock

Me:Wtf

Celo:It does

Me:How would you kn-... Nvm

King:Satan, did you just send a dick pic? [Context:They all call me "Satan"]

Me:No wtf

JJ:Trap

King:Don't lie

Fai:oh

Me:I'm literally bleeding from my twat and you assume I just sent a dick pic

King:TF is a twat?

Celo:Pussy

King:o

Me:I regret life decisions

///

JJ:Lei are these still your notes for us?

"My brother said he is a explosive potato"

"Oofity scoop"

"I mad I wasted 4 years at LCA"

"ok listen here failed abortion im tired of trying to be nice so fuck off you ugly lonely ugly cunt and good night"

"Drink coffee it doesn't stunt ur growth although u don't have growth"

"lmao I got kicked out of 2 friend groups bc i said tiddies in Japanese"

"This is why you're not allowed to have a kid"

///

JJ:Isen wants to speak to your manager lmfao

///

Me:We're great friends here at Chaotic Evil™ the Group Chat HQ

JJ:Move I'm gay

Fai:Oh great

Me:We know

///

Masky:I don't know JJ I just want to kill someone so I can eat *vibrates eyes*

Me:o h l o r d

Me:gEt ThE hOlY wAtEr MoThErFuCkErS

Masky:NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Masky:NOT THAT!

JJ:*sprays with holy water*

Me:XD

Masky:NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

JJ:*spritz spritz bitch*

///

JJ:Everytime somebody says some dumbass shit I have a split decision between saying: "fuckin pardon?" or "come again *****??"

Fai:Why not both

Fai:Mix them together

JJ:Pardon again *****? Fuckin come again??

///

JJ:Anyway I'll be sleeping w multiple soft n fluffy pillows like the trashy hoe i am and y'all will just have to deal, g'night

///

Me:My sister wants to send a bird and some grass to China

///

Fai:i'll just stab him in the dick. No more kids for you buddy

///

Me:Reasons I don't need to discuss you butt taco

///

Jeffo:That goddamn bever exposed my twitter

///

JJ:Don't fuck rachel gardner tf y'all are both underage

///

Celo:Concern is futile

///

Su:You're literally talking to someone who read Danny x Rachel fanfiction at 5 in the morning

///

King:How y'all doing

Fai:Dying

///

Me:*recites the entire script of "history of the entire world, i guess" in chat*

///

JJ:YOU CAN'T TALK ABOUT ANYBODY BEING A BOTTOM CELO

JJ:I PUSHED YOU AND YOU LITERALLY FUCKING MOANED

Su:w o a h t h e r e

///

Me:"My parents are going to beat me" kinky

///

Me:Last year:King being accused of raping JJ

///

Me:ur mum gae

///

Me:SHE WAS LOOKING AT LEVI'S DICK-

Su:And I oop-

Fai:Stop. Halt. Halt. Stop.

///

Me:EVERYONE IS GAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

Fai:No lei

King:Nope

Me:GO BACK TO YOUR CLOSET

///

Me:lets rape africa

Fai:lets not???

Me:they scrambled to see who could rape africa the fastest

///

Me:let's blame the maine on spain

///

JJ:Cactus dildo

///

Me:the holes just appear over night and magically get white stuff in them-

Fai:Alright

Su:I-

///

Me:FBI OPEN UP MOTHERFUCKERS

///

Me:michigan's a 4-year-old basic moody bitch wearing crocs and socks drinking some fucking starbucks and breaking down in the corner of america while everyone else gets high and drunk af and ignores him to cry. except ohio

ohio is michigan's not alone buddy

///

Me:kim kardashian is a boy?

///

Me:levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith levaith

Fai:halt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halthalt halt halt halt halt halt

///

Me:all i heard was big. what-

Fai:don't worry bout it

///

JJ:You ask your broke ass friends if they have money

///

Me:my sister has a girlfriend apparently-

Fai:Her hand

Me:no

King:Jeffo

Fai:ye

Me:This chick she met in a game

JJ:When's the wedding

Me:Lmao

///

"You can't legally stab children"

"Not on purpose anyways"

///

Me:TIL my dad's boss lives near Jeffo and my sister's into punky skaters

JJ:TODAY I LEARNED THAT CELO'S MOM KNOWS MY MOM WHAT THE FUCK

Me:so kids what lesson did we learn

Fai/JJ:Nothing

JJ:Jynx

Fai:This is horrible

///

Celo:unholy tutu screeching intensifies

///

Me:im seriously crying by saying "im a weiner dog"

Me:i am the weiner dog

Me:the holy weiner dog

Su:w h e e z e

Me:im the all-mighty weiner dog

Celo:I can't breathe

Su:c r y i n g

Celo:And I'm ashamed

Me:im crying-

Me:im not

Me:im probably contact-high

///

Su:The question is not are you choking, its what are you choking on?

///

JJ:"Go jerk off to your fictional waifus, you horny fucking weeb"

///

JJ:I speak English not oui oui baguette motherfucker

///

King:i just had a flashback of when Destiny Powell started to have nicknames and called Nini tater tot.

King:then christoff just yelled, TATER TOT SHE'S A THOT

JJ:I don't remember Destiny saying that but i definitely remember Christoff saying that

///

Me:hi and welcome to college! you want fresh air? WELL IT CANT FUCKIN HAPPEN! BECAUSE WE'RE TOO AFRAID YOU'RE GONNA COMMIT SUICIDE! SO THIS IS ALL YA GET. A SMALL CRACK IN THE WINDOW!

///

Me:i enjoy the fact that none of us can actually bother correcting shit after sending unless someone points it out or we notice and it pisses us off.

///

Me:i read that as "my new seat in meth is great"

///

JJ:stop flirting some of us are trying to spill some tea

///

Celo:Squidward thicc af 😏

Me:I- Cel why-

Cel:Aren't you the bitch that likes fell

Me:fuck you dont use this to your advantedge

///

Cel:Also, how does that explain why Skyler doesn't even have a dick

///

Me, using something from Tumblr:

Cel:There's a fight going on down the block. Wanna go see?

JJ:What-

Lei:Wh- what the fuck- why?

Fai throws Jeffo and Kint down the hallway to their right yelling “FUCK YOU!"

Sounds of things smashing

Lei:I could use some air and time out of the house. Sure why not-

Est:Take me with you I've been stuck in here for *counting on fingers* 50 years-

Lei:You're only 21-

Est:It only looks like I'm 21

Lei:What the fuck-

---

JJ:Did Cal just tell me he loves me for the first time?

Lei:Yes.

JJ:And did I just do finger guns back?

Lei:Yes. Yes you did.

---

Cel:Hello-

Fai, grabbing through the bars:*Starts to choke him*

Lei: Faith! Faith! Hold on let him explain!

Fai:He’s selling us out!

Lei:Let. Him. Explain.

Cel:*Coughs* Thank you, Leila.

Cel:I’m selling you out.

Lei:*Angry screaming*

Cel:*Choking noises*

---

Cel:Why are you smiling?

Jeffi:Can’t I just smile? Maybe something good happened and I’m happy!

JJ:Faith tripped and fell in the parking lot.

King:Did she die?

JJ:No

///

Me:you force fed me pizza when i was a baby i remember the future

///

Me:all these quotes from the internet, family members, or friends. then there's "ahem You can't be bisexual if you're sansexual. You get to live with this information now, bye"

///

Some random discord shit

2 notes · View notes

school-n-jazz · 5 years

Text

Your Under A-rest!

Fun fact! The action expressed above by Eddie Redmayne is actually a part of a vocal warm-up and technique. By grabbing your tongue, you are forcing the muscle to drop at the back of your throat; and in turn, releasing tension in your soft-palette. Once you do this action enough, it will become muscle memory to sing with a relaxed throat, and you will strain your vocal cords to a lesser degree.

Boom. One easy vocal technique learned.

(Make sure your hands are clean when you do this one though, lol)

Now as great as puns and vocal techniques are, it is best to apply them after you do a fairly decent warm up - which is probably why you are here in the first place.

Worry not, fellow vocalist! For on this post I will be going over:

6 Things to Include in a Vocal Warm-Up!

Now keep in mind, some of these exercises may seem weird, or make you self-conscious when you do them for the first time. But let me tell you this.

I have been doing them for four years now, and they truly work. Just push aside your doubts and go with them. Have fun with them. So without further ado, let us begin!

Number One: Proper Posture.

Proper posture, without a doubt, is one of the most important things to have when you exert yourself vocally. Having a fully supported diaphragm is key to keeping good vocal health, utilizing your breath to it’s fullest, as well as lessening any back problems you may have in the future. (lol)

Let me explain how you can get, and make sure you have, proper posture.

To start, if you’re standing have your feet shoulder-width apart. Have your shoulders back, but relaxed; and have your chest comfortably lifted to allow air into your diaphragm. We aren’t birds, we don’t puff our chests. Make sure your knees aren’t locked (straight), as this may cause your blood to flow improperly and you may pass out.

Most points mentioned above still apply when you sing while sitting - the feet shoulder-width apart, shoulders back, and your chest comfortably lifted - just add into your sitting posture feet flat on the floor and yourself sitting on the edge of your chair, and you’re golden.

To make sure your feet are shoulder width apart, clench your hands into fists. Place your fist together with your thumbs touching, and then place them in the space between your feet. If they fit snugly, then you’re the perfect space apart. If not, adjust yourself.

Number Two: Breathe Support.

Fun fact! Singing is just glorified exhaling; and due to this fact, it is important to learn how to inhale and exhale in a way that utilizes your breath to it’s fullest.

Also breathing is good. You should learn to do it well.

So, I’m going to start by bashing a breathing myth straight in its face. Bouncing bellies does not mean deep breaths.

I was personally taught in elementary that having my stomach move was a sign of deep breathes. A moving chest was bad, and moving shoulders even worst; So it was a shock when my ninth grade vocal teacher straight up told us to forget that lesson within the first week of school.

Turns out, forcing your chest to be tense and your stomach muscles to work when they shouldn’t causes the diaphragm to have less space to open and close. Wow.

It also turns out that its okay for your chest to somewhat lift, as it is your diaphragm that moves it while your lungs expand it.

As shown in the only good gif found below.

As gross as you may find it, try to watch the lungs as they expand.

At first, it may seem that the muscle swells in all directions; however, if you continue to watch you may find that it doesn’t. In the beginning the lungs swell out, then you can see that they rapidly expand in the front part of the lung, followed by them flopping up in the back.

Thus your stomach shouldn’t move THAT much, it should only move a little - The muscles are still fairly close to one another after all! Same applies with your upper-chest area.

Make sure when you breathe, your chest doesn’t lift too much, and that it’s your back that expands more. That is proof of a proper deep breath.

To make sure you breath deep, sit up straight. Place your finger on the bottom front part of your ribs, and your thumbs on the back; similarly to how one places their hands on their hips. Now take a deep breath, feeling the air on the tip of your tongue to the back of your throat.

Do you feel your thumbs being moved? That’s your lungs expanding fully. If not, try to adjust how you breathe, and where you feel the air. Once you find the perfect position, just breathe like that for a couple of minutes if you wish to commit this breathing pattern to muscle memory.

Some teachers also consider this breathing a warm-up in itself, as it stretches the diaphragm and lungs.

One last thing before we go onto the other warm-ups. Jolting shoulders mean tense and sudden breaths. Try to avoid it.

Now that the basics have been covered, onto the verbal and physical warm-ups!

Number Three: Shake Down

Fun Fact! This exercise is done by both theater people and vocalist!

The shake down is just that, you shaking out multiple parts of your body. You start with one hand and shake it eight times, then shake down your opposite hand eight times; then your one foot and then your other foot. After that you repeat the process starting at seven; then six; then five and so forth.

Now you may be wondering, why exactly this is considered a vocal warm up you should include? Wouldn’t doing proper stretches be just as effective?

Well, you are partially correct. Stretches are super effective, and great for your posture.

I just haven’t explained the vocal aspect of this exercise - you see, we’ll be giving every number a pitch, and descending from do. The best way to explain it to someone new to music, would be to do this exercise on a piano in the key of C major.

Shown above are all the notes and solfège (do, re, mi, etc.) associated to each note in a C major scale. What this image does not include however, is that the white key beside ti (the last labeled key) is also a do or C.

Fun fact! C always comes before the two black keys, and the notes in music only includes letters A through G.

As to not complicate things, I’ll assign the pitch (letter) to the number you will be singing in a legend below. Starting from left to right of the labeled keys we have:

Do = C (lower) = 1

Re = D = 2

Mi = E = 3

Fa = F = 4

So = G = 5

La = A = 6

Ti = B = 7

Do = C (higher) = 8

Great! Now I want you to play the high C, and try to sing it to the word eight. Find the note is too high or low? Just go to the C above or below!

Remember! When singing, you should always hold the vowel in a word for as long as you can, and only articulate your final consonants at the very end of the word.

Once you’ve sung eight, sing the B on the word seven; the A on the word six; the G on the word five; the F on the word four; the E on the word three; the D on the word two; the C on the word one.

Done? Congratulations! You just sang what is known as a descending scale. All that’s left for you to do is apply the earlier explained hand-foot shaking pattern to the note-number pattern and boom. You have a vocal shake-down as apposed to a theater shake down,

Note! You will be singing the descending scale four times, as you are shaking out four separate limbs; and you will be starting a note lower each time, as you count down from seven, six, five, and so forth. Also, if you want you can remove the numbers and only sing saying the solfa syllables (do, re, mi, etc).

Number Four: Tongue Twisters

Now everyone should be familiar with tongue twister, which are just sentences full of similar sounding vowels and consonants. You may remember doing some more commonly known ones such as Peter Piper, or She Saw Sea-Shells when you were younger; but fun and games aside, these sentences help you with deciding on where to put articulations in a word, or how you should spread the vowel shape. I’m going to share with you two that we commonly do in my class - Maybe My Mummy and A Big Black Bug.

The following tongue twisters go:

Maybe my mummy may go to Miami or maybe my mummy may not.

And

A big black bug bit a big black bear and the big black bear bled blood

Simple, right? lol, maybe not But now that we got the words down, lets get to the notes.

As we previously went over notes in the shake-down warm-up, I’ll be placing the notes on the piano above the words instead of completely typing them out - similarly to how most guitar chord to lyrics guides are. However, I’ll also be adding in timing.

For this to work best, pull up a metronome (on the web if you don’t have one), and set it to be 4/4 time, with a nice 65 BPM. Click play and listen to where the beats fall. Refer to the table below to the timing of each note in connection to the words.

When ever the words or numbers are bold, it means that that word or number lands on a beat.

If there is a dash between the two numbers, it means you hold the word above for that number of counts

The numbers between the beats are what the beats are subdivided into. They are as follows

-“...1 2 3 2...” mean three syllables fall under one beat

- “...1 2 2...” means two syllables fall under one beat

In the case where the count does not start on one, just start from that count and follow the beat to bold pattern given

The final consonants of the final words always go on the end of the last beat

Note! The timing and notes were done on pc, and therefore lines up best on that platform.

I’ll start with the easier one, Maybe My Mummy.

C C C C C C C C C C C C C C C C C C C

May-be my mum-my may go to Mi-a-mi or may-be my mum-my may not.

1 2 3 2 2 3 3 4 1 2 3-4

Yup. The entire thing is one note. Once your done playing that note, you go up to the next note (which in this case is the black key directly beside c), and even remove the metronome are put the BPM to a faster setting.

Note! The distance from one note to the note directly after that is known as a semitone. A whole-tone is made up of two semitones, and a certain pattern of while tones and semitones is used to determine whether a song is major, minor, natural, harmonic, or melodic.

A Big Black Bug is not as easy as Maybe My Mummy, and consists of multiple notes. In C major, it can be sung/played as follows:

C C C C C C C E G G G G G G E C

A big black bug bit a big black bear and the big black bear bled blood

42 1 2 3 4 2 1 2 3 4 2 1 2 3 4 1

Number Five: Bing

Bing is a super beautiful exercise that focuses or vowel shape, proper breath support, and resonance (the way your notes ring in the air).

Note! If you’re warming for more classical pieces (opera and musical theater), you generally want to have a very open registers during this exercise. For something for modern such as pop, focus on having a more nasally sound.

Now like Maybe my Mummy, this entire exercise is sung on one note and you ascend in semi-tones; however, that’s where the similarities end.

For this one we start on the by singing the word Bing on a C; then, without taking a breath or leaving a space (unless you’re about to faint), we transition to sing i, e, a, o, u. The pronunciation of each vowel is given below.

i = [ee]

e = [eh]

a = [ah]

o = [oh]

u = [oo]

Now try it out again, this time focusing on one point of the room your in - or on the gif provided bellow.

Focus on your point of attention. This time when you sing, gently open the back of your throat, and imagine the sound coming from behind you and over your head, going directly at your point. Shoot the sound it towards it.

Now adjust the way your mouth and throat feels to get a greater ring, and play around withe the placement until you can almost hear the overtones.

But remember! Being resonant doesn’t always mean being loud!

Number: ... Done?

By this point, you should be warmed up nicely enough to do some gentle singing of songs; which will further warm you without other people questioning what’s going on, lol.

I hope you enjoyed this post, and stay tuned for any more I may make!

(also it’s 1am - so peace!)

#vocal warmup #warmup #no vocal strain!#hot to #how to warmup #how to warmup vocally #how to do a vocal warmup #How to vocally warm up #how to warm up #how to do a vocal warm up

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neo-shitty · 3 years

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toffee!

no dont apologise! i didnt check until just then so np :)

mmm yeah it is a bit trippy. hehe ITS TRUE THO. yeah sadly i think ur right, and tag blocking is probably a good idea. sometimes smut written well or not in excess is okay but goddamn when its abt 01 line and thats the whole fic... *silently blocks tags*

hehe i do that all the time lol this conversation is carrying on threads from a month ago :) mmm yeah ur probably right sadly, same. HA HE DIDNT HAVE A CHOICE and now i have someone to talk to abt them, so thats good! I KNOW felix was actually the one who got me into skz with his iconique gods menu line so i guess i have a soft spot for him. i always tell myself my bias is chan but ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ guess im more whipped than id like to admit. mmm yeah that does make sense dw i hope they do that as well. YES king seungmin hIMSELF. GODDAMNIT DONT GET ME STARTED ON MINHO IN GODS MENU I DIDNT EVEN KNOW HE WAS PART OF THE GROUP UNTIL I STARTED GETTING MORE INTO THEM. BITCH (affectionate) THE LINE DISTRIBUTION HAS BEEN UTTER DOG SHIT but *deep breath* its better now so were moving on adn hoping it stays that way. sis same but i may or may not have gone thru a rlly depressed phase and actively sought out the elimination episodes so i could actually force some tears out of my emotionless shell of a heart but what cna you do? lmaoo i feel that irl, binnie deserves more vocal lines. yesss channies accent is rlly prominent then, i think also the way he structures his phrasing? is more english speaking than korean? but yeah i totally get what ur saying. AJKSAL lmao

okay then! im excited for whenever it gets done! (maybe tag me?) ahh the cold shrivelled heart of a dark au writer beats again at the thought of torturing another poor characters very soul (/j) :(( yeah that would suck not being able to see them. ohhh ur on the other hemisphere to me! were just going into spring rn. mmm smth to look forward to! YES you put it into words. they rlly are pretty independent from the company (remember how jyp rejected that other dudes songs after like 3 seconds and then how he was apparently nervous to show the song hed written to chan cos chan was so good at writing hits ahhh sweet revenge) mmmYES we rlly need a mute and remove notifications button for our brains dont we?

YES CORRECT i totally agree. some people jsut dont give it a try, adn assume its bad cos its korean smh racist assholes. yes! im coming up to my 6 month anniv actually! sis sAME, i feel like theyre being tugged into appealing to the western american market and theyre not staying as true to their artistic flair as a group, especially with only writing english songs atm. *sigh* ah well, at least theyre bringing recognition to the kpop world. AHUH dead on, theyre going to be discarded pretty soon and then where will bp be? theyll prob go solo paths which is rlly sad but what can you do when the company is run by a prideful asshole? yg is not going to last much longer in the big four if they keep this up.

hehe you get it. oooh very cool! whos ur ult? (sorry if youve said this before) mmmm yeah good decision, i feel liek thats probably a wise decision. this is my first album release as a kpop stan (not counting mixtape oh) so i think ill get it for sentiments sake. yeah! im excited for the new music! mingi was the one who got me into them, but atm my bias is seonghwa followed by san, wooyoung and ateez but jonghos high notes man *swoon* he, yeah atm ive got jake, jay, nikki, jungwon and sunoo down so just trying to get the rest :) heh, yeah kard i rlly only got into cos of bm, ive seen him like interacting with a lot of idols and he seemed nice so i decided to check out the group. ikr gunshot man *another swoon*

no noe! i didnt know what it was until i got it lol. thx toffee ill try and take that to mind :) yeah lol im on a waiting list thats not going to be free until late september so hopefully i can hold on until then. hope ur okay, that sounds like it sucks, hope you can find someone. maybe ill just take you along on my phone and the therapist can get a two for one patient deal lmaooo. mmm, sorry no i havent mentioned it before, i dont rlly talk abt it much. uhhh basically hypermobility? if you google it, it doesnt seem bad, jsut joint flexibility but ive got the severe end of the stick, leaning towards ehlers danlos syndrome so thats fun. basically it just makes it hard for me to exercise, run, jump, stand or just walk for long periods of time and gives me a lot of joint and muscle pain so... thats fun! but obviously so many other people have it worse than me, so i try not to complain. normally in young people it will improve as they get older, but my doctor said bc its severe in me, its unlikely to get much better. but again, i dont have the worst lot in the bunch, so its all g.

oh its good that its not the bad type of rain, a light sprinkling can be relaxing sometimes. aww thx darl, the concern is appreciated but it went pretty well and i managed not to cough too much on stage or kill myself trying to run around to the other side of the stage in the pouring rain so thats good! oooh tea buddies! my dogs a labradoodle, but shes a bit more of a feral poodle lol not much labrador in her at all, unless its her relentless urge to hunt down every bird that has ever walked this earth smh :((( hopefully they can come back on soon, does uni have dances?

ahhh a mood if i ever heard one. hopefully things will get better for you soon, ik anxiety sucks ass. ooh thats always good! when its sunny here, its always melt ur thongs to the pavement hot so the nicely cool sunny days are a lovely change. hehe impatience is not so good for you, but good for us that get to see ur beautiful theme early. ahh no worries, itll come eventually hopefully. and if not, then just things that make you not anxious are good. it doesnt have to be black or white, sometimes gray is good. mmmmm sames i have midterms this week to catch up on and then two weeks of end of terms so thats fun! i hope u can overcome that a little, heres some channie to be ur motivation https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a8LWyNjzOww. hah! i hear that all the time, he seems to be everywhere. did you see that tiktok of hans slowed back door rap, i stg it sounded EXACTLY like namjoon, it kinda scared me. also teh beginning of another day, sounds so much like joon i swear.

that reminds me! idk ur biases! i feel like this should be smth i should know so please! feel free to elaborate!

ahh im glad, i was worried it is. mmm same, so no hard feelings if either of us misses a day or smth. ill start worrying if weeks/months have gone by, but if its just a little while thats more than fine. ill just picture you studiously completing notes and i wont worry lol

<3 w.a. 🐺

at some point i really think i'm going to start blocking accounts because blocking tags won't be enough. i saw ask tags the other day and it just made me want to bleach my eyeballs.

i could talk about god's menu felix for hours man. the teaser for god's menu that featured his part on the bridge made me look forward to the mv release. you: biases chan, also you: lixiesbabyhands. yes you are more whipped than you think. i can't believe orange haired minho was given NOTHING during that era but they kind of made up for it in the b-sides. i also hope it stays that way. the distribution for this era was pretty fair.

"torturing another poor character's soul" in all honesty, i used to live for this. 2017 me leading up to early 2020 wrote nothing but angst. i have another aussie friend on twt and tbh i'm still really (O.o) about the seasons! jyp should be terrified skz could easily take over that company. heck if skz grow old and start their own company, they'd probably do a great job at running it. PLEASE. i have issues on muting/notifications both mentally and in real life. sometimes, i just wish to disappear.

some people in my country are just disgusting tbh. not only racist but homophobic too. they label kpop as 'gay' and it DISGUSTS me. it's a problematic behavior/mindset people in my country need to fucking get rid of. anyway, HELP ME 6 MONTHS??? and i've been in this shit for like a decade eye. tbh, i’m not fond of kpop groups trying to appeal to the western audience :// it feels like they’re losing their identity in a way. yes recognition but at what cost? yg has my favorite groups but that’s one shitty company when it comes to promoting.

okay my ult! it’s haechan from nct but i consider chan an ult too. like a close second above my whopping list of kpop boys. oh yes! you should get the album just for like a keepsake? remembrance? how did mingi appeal to you? omg did you start getting interested in ateez back when he was still on hiatus? NOT YOU BIASING THE SAME PEOPLE I DID WHEN I FIRST STARTED STANNING. the infamous ateez thot-line. jongho is easily one of the best fourth gen vocalists out here, no one can change my mind :( good luck with memorizing the rest of enhypen! just in time for the comeback too. i hope i’ll get into kard soon but i’m pretty content (and a tad bit overwhelmed) with the amount of groups i stan right now.

please hold on though, feel free to vent here if you like. thanks for the offer tho HAHA but like i’ll try to get checked here too when the cases die down a bit. i’m sorry to hear about your condition though :( please don’t ever overwork yourself to the point that your joints/muscles would ache. it’s completely valid to complain about it tho. i get that you have others in mind but keeping that mindset really doesn’t do you (like you internally) any better? so if you need to, vent your frustrations out and don’t keep it in.

oh my god, about your performance last sunday. was the stage out in the open? glad you didn’t cough too much and did well on your concert. i’m proud of you! i can never understand dogs and poor birds T_T uni doesn’t have dances unfortunately. i think there’s just one party at the end like a graduation ball. what year are you in anyway? if it’s something that you’re fine with sharing. if not, it’s cool.

good luck with your exams! and thanks for the link! AHA what a cutie. i think he does this motivation thing once in a while during his lives and it’s just comforting. yeah joon and han my irl just freaked when we made that discovery. ult crumbs for her. oh god not me forgetting about every biases when you asked. you can ask for my biases in a few groups just list down the one’s you’re interested in knowing.

i missed yesterday because i was grinding and finishing what if we stay + school work. finally did it today. i’m sure i’ll reply in like a day or two, definitely not a month unless i state otherwise. if i ever decide to abandon this blog, i’ll let you know.

#toff.asks #wild anon 🐺

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sherlockxreader · 7 years

Text

30 Day Writing Challenge - Day 11

Day 11: Wearing kigurumis

Summary: Sherlock gets frustrated at you and John when you two are texting about kigurumis Author: Maddy (@laterthantherabbit) Words: 2100 Characters/Relationships: Sherlock x Reader, John x sister!reader Warnings: Excessive texting?

Author’s Notes: Honestly I had no idea what these things were until I searched them up and then I realised that my sister had one and that my brother gave me his so this is based on my own experiences really, even the texting bit, which is how I annoy my brother sometimes.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

They had finally came. You had ordered these weeks ago but it had taken forever for them to be delivered to 221B Baker Street, but now they had finally come. You took the package from the delivery man, after signing for them and wishing the man a good rest of his day, and scurried back into your flat. You had used your phone to order the two onsie-like garments and had erased any evidence of your being on the website. There was no way Sherlock was expecting these things.

You ripped open the packaging and took out the first kigurumi. It was light pink and white, with a curly tail attached to the back and the features of a cute piglet on the hood. You held it up against your body and saw that they had gotten the size of it correct, it would hang on your body as it should without disturbing your movements. You squealed out at its perfectness before gathering the other one to look at. It was bright orange with black stripes, the tiger hood featured foam fangs that would frame the face of whoever wore it. It was larger than your kigurumi, but perfect for the man who would be wearing it. You sent off a text to your brother, your plan finally being able to begin.

You: Operation Animal Farm is go

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

John had been out with Sherlock on a case when he got your text. He tried hard to keep his face neutral but with Sherlock around, that was impossible. “What are you smiling about?”

“Nothing, it’s just Y/N.”

“Well what did she send? You hardly have this reaction to her texts every other day.”

“I’m telling you Sherlock, it’s nothing, just a sibling joke from our childhood that she remembered.” Sherlock huffed as he looked John up and down. He didn’t like not knowing things, especially when it came to either you or John. He didn’t bring up the text again until he and John were in the cab on the way back to 221B after catching the murderer. It was nearing 11 pm when you sent of another text to John, him laughing a little this time around.

You: The hell you at??? >:(

You: I’ve waited too long for this to have to be held up by you old man

“John really, what is she texting you about?”

John rolled his eyes as he regarded Sherlock’s person with his arms crossed and a smirk on his face. “Why are you so interested in what me and my sister are talking about Sherlock?”

“I’m not.”

“You are and you know it.” Sherlock scoffed and looked out of his window while John laughed a little more, shooting off a text to you.

John: Just coming back from case now, nearly there

John: And I’m only 3 years older than you, you know

You: Still old :P

John smiled at your text. He always thought your use of emoticons was weird but he liked seeing the little faces on his phone. He looked to Sherlock again who was trying to the texts you and John were sending. John had deleted the Animal Farm text before getting in the cab, knowing Sherlock would try to read them, so instead of seeing the plan you had, he instead saw sibling banter. John cocked his eyebrow as Sherlock leaned in further before he realised John was watching him. He straightened up and crossed his arms, a pout forming on his face. John shook his head, his smile wider than what it was before, and texted you back, making sure Sherlock had no way to read the following messages.

John: Sherlock’s onto us

You: Is he reading your texts again?

John: Trying to. I’m deleting them as I go

You: Smart im gonna do the same. i’ve gotta go hide these things before he gets here

You: 10 bucks says he’ll come to my flat before sulking upstairs

John: Of course he’s going to snoop around your flat first. I’m not betting that

You: youre no fun john :(

You: I’ve hidden the things in hudders closet. No way he’ll look there

You: I’m so smart :))))

John: no you aren’t. Did you even ask Mrs. Hudson

You: of course I did. Im not a savage. Rude :(

You: talk when you get here.

You: We’ll finalise plan then. >:)

John chuckled as the cab pulled up at 221B. Sherlock exited the car swiftly, leaving John to pay the fare as usual. Instead of trudging up to his flat to sulk, Sherlock bypassed the stairs to come to your flat, as you and John had predicted. He entered without knocking, his coat flapping behind him with the speed he entered.

“Sherlock! Hi!”

“What were you and John texting about?”

“What? Oh you mean just now? Nothing really, just sibling stuff.”

“Then you wouldn’t mind if I read the messages you’ve been sending hm?” Sherlock had scanned your flat before finding your phone on the small coffee table. He quickly had your phone in his hands, it already being unlocked and your text messages on display. Unknown to him however, you had also deleted the texts you and John had been sending, only those about John’s age being there for him to read. “Oh.”

“Were you expecting something else Sherlock?” You could hardly contain your giggling as Sherlock scowled, handing your phone back forcefully before stomping up the steps to 221B to curl up on the couch, petulance written in every feature of his body. You had followed him up with a cheeky grin on your face as you watched his movements. John emerged from the kitchen with two mugs in his hands. Sherlock held his hand out for John to put a mug in it, yet instead John tsked, heading over to you instead.

“This is for Y/N Sherlock. Make your own tea!” You burst out laughing as you took the mug from John’s hands. Sherlock had sat up straight now, his jaw slack as he looked to you and John, both of you brandishing matching and mischievous smiles. He stalled for sometime, just watching the two of you team up against him before he huffed and moved to the kitchen to make tea before sitting down at his microscope. He was mumbling about scheming brothers and sisters the whole way. You and John sat down in his and Sherlock’s chairs with your tea, still giggling a little from the impromptu jab at Sherlock’s ego as you pulled out your phone and waved it at John. He nodded and pulled out his own phone as you started a fake conversation to cover up your texting.

“So how’s Greg going John?”

You: we have to start soon before he gets any more suspicious

“He’s going good, though I’m afraid he’s going to lose it if Sherlock keeps abusing all the new officers.” Sherlock scoffed extra loud so you and John would hear him.

John: tomorrow? Sherlock hasn’t got anything on now after this case

“Poor Greg. We should go out with him again soon. I need a good night out from here.”

You: sounds good but how are you going to pick up yours?

“We’re going out to the pub next Friday if you wanted to come.”

John: ill come down saying you texted me about a leaky tap and then ill wear it back up

“Sure that sounds good.”

You: Ooo john so sneaky ;)

You: ill come up with you then as well yeah?

John: Yep

You: :D

John shook his head as he pocketed his phone whilst you drained your tea and then went back down to you flat after ruffling Sherlock’s hair and planting a kiss on top of his locks, him giving an indignant squawk at the unanticipated action. John soon retired as well, leaving only Sherlock sitting at his microscope, a scowl etched on his face.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

You had woken up late the next day but you quickly came to your senses when you realised that today you were finally going to surprise Sherlock. You showered and dressed quickly, Mrs.Hudson appeared soon after with yours and John’s onesies. You thanked her quietly before you slipped your onesie over your leggings and tank top. It wasn’t long after you finished eating some toast when John texted you.

John: coming now

You put your phone in one of the large pockets your kigurumi had and waited for John to knock on your door before he entered the room. “Oh John thanks for coming down. It’s the bathroom tap.” You called out loud enough so Sherlock would hear you before you heard John’s deep chuckles at your clothing. “Shhh! John shut up he’ll hear you!” You covered his mouth as you smiled brightly. “Come on, your’s is in my room. Go put it on.” He quelled his laughing to light giggles as he disappeared into your room before coming back, clad in his tiger onesie. This time it was you who needed your mouth covered as you laughed at John. John giggled again before grasping your hand and leading you up the stairs. Before he pushed the door open he turned to you and nodded, controlling his features into a near neutral expression. You nodded back, doing the same before entering the flat. Sherlock laid prone on the couch, his hands steepled under his chin and his eyes closed. You smirked before speaking up. “Thanks so much for fixing that tap John.”

“No problem Y/N. Would you like some tea?”

“Yes thanks, I’ll make it though.” You walked into the kitchen before having to cover your mouth to prevent hysterical laughter from erupting from your throat. You put the kettle on to boil and pulled out your phone to text John again.

You: How long till he notices do you think?

You got your reply as you finished putting the milk in the cups.

John: I’d say an hour. He’s really in the zone. He’s hardly moved

You giggled as you pocketed your phone again and brought the tea out into the room. “Here John.”

“Thanks Y/N.” You sat in Sherlock’s chair and contained your laughter. You could just imagine the face Sherlock was going to make when he finally opened his eyes. You brought your phone back out and looked up to see John had done the same. You began to text.

You: I’m bored

John: God you sound like Sherlock. Read the news or something.

John: We don’t know how long we’re going to have to wait for.

You pouted before an idea popped into your head. You sat on your phone, typing and deleting characters before you were finally happy with the result before sending it back to John.

You: Look at this

You: ( ಥـْـِـِـِـْಥ)

John: What. is that?

You: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

John: God stop these are creepy

You: Hey. Hey john.

You: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) Heeeeeeeeeeeeeeey

John couldn’t keep out the bark of laughter that erupted from his chest, quickly followed by your own. “What the hell are those?” You both froze at the voice and turned your heads to see Sherlock sitting up and staring at the both of you with the most confused face you had ever seen on him. You both looked back at each other before breaking into another fit of laughter. You could hardly breath as you kept looking back to Sherlock to see him become even more confused when he didn’t get an answer. You laughed so hard that you fell off Sherlock’s chair, causing John to laugh even harder. You couldn’t stop laughing for several minutes and when you thought you had finally finished, you saw Sherlock again, this time smiling slightly at your antics. You sighed and looked up at him from your place on the ground, still giggling sometimes along with John. “So this is what you two were texting about?”

“Yep. I made a bet with John ages ago about how I could buy something ridiculous without you knowing and it worked, didn’t it?” You stood up in your pig onesie as John wiped tears from his eyes, hugging Sherlock as you tried to calm down more. He chuckled slightly at finally finding out that yours and John’s secretive nature was due to another one of your bets. He kissed the top of your head and returned the hug.

“Indeed it did.”

#30 day challenge #sherlock x reader #sister!reader #sherlock holmes #john watson #john x reader #maddy #maddy writes #laterthantherabbit

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basicallybing · 7 years

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Get to Know Me (Tag)

Rules: Answer these 92 statements and tag some friends.

Thanks for tagging me, @steve-rogers-best-girl :)

LAST:

1. drink: water

2. phone call: my dad

3. text message: my dad

4. song you listened to: i think Holding On To You by twenty one pilots

5. time you cried: a couple hours ago

HAVE YOU:

6. dated someone twice: lol joke’s on you i haven’t even dated someone once ha. ha. ha. ugh.

7. kissed someone and regretted it: i haven’t ever kissed someone at all lol what are these questions

8. been cheated on: in a competitive game of pokemon maybe but yall i havent dated what is happening

9. lost someone special: i mean i once had a toxic friend and i super duper got rid of her i guess but like thats it

10. been depressed: never been diagnosed but im pretty sure i’ve had depression since around third grade (but that’s a story for another time)

11. gotten drunk and thrown up: ew???? i’ve never even drank alcohol why am i answering these questions ew

LIST THREE FAVORITE COLORS:

12. white

13. various blues and teals

14. golden yellow

IN THE LAST YEAR, HAVE YOU:

15. made new friends: yep!

16. fallen out of love: platonically with a toxic-as-heck friend yeah

17. laughed until you cried: absolutely!

18. found out someone was talking about you: yep

19. uhh ya skipped 19 so idk what to put here lol

20. found out who your friends are: yeah

21. kissed someone on your facebook list: sErIoUsLy? *face palm*

GENERAL:

22. how many of your facebook friends do you know irl? i dont have a facebook

23. do you have any pets? yep, a doggo!

24. do you want to change your name? y e s p l e a s e ! ! ! ! !

25. what did you do for your last birthday? had some of muh frens over

26. what time do you wake up? for school at like 5:30, but over the summer i’ve been waking up around 9ish

27. what were you doing at midnight last night? crying

28. name something you can’t wait for: a month ago i would have said Pokemon Go Fest but nope i got my hopes up for that like usual and of course i cant go uh i cant wait to get a desk finally i dont have a desk *shrug*

29. when was the last time you saw your mom? *shouts down the hall* “hi mom!”

30. what is one thing you wish you could change in your life? i’d like a whole new wardrobe that magically made me look thinner and happier all the time and that allowed strangers to see me for me and not me for some slouch who wears sweatpants all the time bc i dont have any other clothes that dont cripple me with dysphoria lmao woot woot

31. what are you listening to right now? primarily Regional at Best by twenty one pilots bc its calming for me

32. have you ever talked to a person named tom? actually??? im not sure...?? i’ve definitely talked to a few thomas-es but none of them go by tom *shrug*

33. something that is getting on your nerves: when my mom says we can’t afford to buy me a desk but then she goes out and buys other decor for the house

34. most visited website: probably youtube, netflix, instagram, and tumblr if you include the use of apps

35. any moles? nope

36. any birthmarks? none of which i’m aware

37. childhood dream: not sure. i always wanted to be a superhero like spider-man and whatnot i guess.

38. hair color? brown

39. hair length? short

40. do you have a crush? do fictional characters count? if so, yes -- peter parker, ben wyatt, and chandler bing

41. what do you like about yourself? i’m nice.

42. any piercings? just the basic earlobe piercings, but i never wear anything in them. i’m surprised theyre still open.

43. blood type? crap i need to ask my mom about this. it’s good to know for safety reasons.

44. any nicknames? anything you know me as on here is technically a nickname because i go by my birthname everywhere else... sooo, yeah. chandler is a nickname. i also get addressed as ‘???’ and as ‘Q,’ which is just short for “question marks” bc idk what my name should be but yep i go by chandler for now i guess *shrug*

45. relationship status: jealous

46. zodiac: aries

47. pronouns: they/them are preferable but i never correct people if they use anything else bc i’m just so accustomed to my own confusion

48. favorite tv show: agh i guess Parks and Rec is my number-one, but i also love Friends, The Good Place, Agents of SHIELD, Daredevil, and Legion (which cRaP i need to finish watching)

49. uh yeah i think you skipped this one too

50. righty or lefty? righty

51. any surgeries? nope

52. ever dye your hair? I WISH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

53. favorite sport? to play? basketball. to watch? football. although if my family was more into hockey i bet i’d love that.

54. hgfdskgfskjfhskjf you skipped this one too

55. dream vacation? honestly, i don’t care where we go as long as it’s somewhere out of the country and i get to travel with my friends in an evan edinger sorta way, you know?

56. favorite pair of sneakers? i mean?? i only have the one... it’s a nike hyperdunk i think? like, an older one? idk theyre comfy

57. eating: nothing right now...

58. drinking: i mean i have water next to me so like i guess water is my answer

59. about to: hurry the heck up and finish answering these questions lmao

60. you skipped it

61. ........

62. want: to travel and to be happy

63. ever going to get married? if i do, it won’t be a huge ceremony. it won’t be religious. and it will have to be to somebody very, very special to me.

64. career: i’m a student right now

65. hugs or kisses? if i have to choose, hugs, but please don’t hug me without asking and dont be offended if i say no. i’m really uncomfortable about physical contact.

66. lips or eyes? eyes 1000000%

67. tall or short? i’m short.

68. older or younger? what’s this question...? im confused and don’t know how to answer it tbh

69. there’s no question here

70. nice arms or nice stomach? me? neither lol im Ugly

71. sensitive or loud? if you’re close with me, you’re the lucky people who know i’m both

72. hook up or relationship? EW DEFINITELY RELATIONSHIP IM SO ASEXUAL

73. troublemaker or hesitant? this makes it sound like it’s bad to not be a troublemaker. i’m not a troublemaker but its not because im hesitant. it’s because im a good person. and i dont mean to imply that troublemakers arent good people, but im not either of those things...???

HAVE YOU EVER:

74. kissed a stranger? i h a v e n e v e r k i s s e d a n y o n e .

75. drank hard liquor? i a m u n d e r a g e .

76. lost glasses or contact lenses? no, but i’ve broken my glasses before

77. turned someone down? unless you include that time that i was asked out as a dare, no.

78. had sex on the first date? i h a v e n e v e r b e e n o n a d a t e a n d i a m a s e x u a l .

79. broken someone’s heart? not that i’m aware of

80. had your heart broken? yeah, by that Toxic Person who i mention all the time. it wasnt a romantic thing but i hate that person with a burning passion i cannot even bEGIN to tell you

81. been arrested? no definitely not

82. cried when someone died? in real life? . . . no. no one close to me has died. but i have cried at fictional deaths

83. fallen for a friend? kind of but not really idk its complicated and not worth it

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:

84. yourself? on good days

85. miracles? not unless by “mircales” you mean “coincidences”

86. love at first sight? not for myself, but maybe for someone who is more into looks. and i dont mean that negatively but like thats just not really my kinds thing necessarily.

87. santa claus? well considering i was raised jewish but am currently atheist imma have to say no

88. kissing on the first date? i’ve never been able to experience what kissing or dating is like but if it feels right for someone then i have nothing against it

OTHER:

90. current best friend names: katie, claire, lizzie (i tag posts with their names when stuff reminds me of them hehe)

91. eye color? brown

92. favorite movie? i loved that new Spider-Man: Homecoming film, but Guardians of the Galaxy has always been one of my go-to movies, so probably GOTG

i tag anyone who wants to do this bc frankly im lazy and dont feel like tagging anyone heh lol

#mine #tag meme #me

3 notes · View notes

insane-ej-blog · 7 years

Text

His Angel...

All he remembers are her soft giggles. Her cute little white freckles and how utterly adorable she looked when she blushed. He couldn't get her out of his head. He was blushing madly and was purring at the thought of her. "Luna..." even the sound of her name brings shivers down his spine. She's an angel to him.... A small gray skeleton with white freckles walked in the room. She had a large smile on her face, "A-Abyss!" She had her arms out to feel the air, hoping to feel him. He chuckled at the sight, 'She's so cute...' he quickly got up in order to be next to her. When he was in front of her, she began to feel his face. She smiles once she recognized him, "A-Abyss! I-I've missed you!" She giggles then buried her face into his chest, taking in his scent. Abyss began to purr loudly at that action, "I missed you too princess...so how's the little one?" He asked as he put his hand on her semi large stomach. She lets out a sigh, "Amazing...everything is amazing." She puts her hands on his face again, her fingers brushed on his 'lips'. She had a small smile as she leaned in for a kiss. She missed though, "A-Awe!" She pouts, "I-I-I don't like missing..." Abyss chuckled at her pouting then pulled her in a soft kiss. Who knew that this would be their final moments?... Luna was walking in the woods. She knew she shouldn't be walking in alone but she always took the challenge. She enjoyed walking in the woods alone since she began to memorize the woods, she felt accomplished from that fact. She wanted to get a couple of flowers for Abyss as a way of thanking him for making her life complete. She knew she would get in some sort of trouble so, she brought her walking stick. It felt around the ground, telling her what's there and what isn't. She was too focused on the bird's lovely singing to even feel the presence approaching her. She was blind. She stopped dead in her tracks once she heard a twig snapping. Her soul began to beat, who was there? "A-Abyss? Is that you?" She whispered. There was no reply, she knew it wasn't Abyss. Her shaky hand found its way to her stomach. She held her stomach tightly since she wanted to protect her unborn baby from whatever what was approaching her. She heard a dark chuckle.... She knew it was now. It was them... Her bullies. She didn't know why she had bullies. She didn't even know why bully the blind girl? But she never got the answer to those questions. Either way, those questions weren't important at the moment. They are here, she's pregnant and she doesn't have Abyss. "Well, well...look who's here boys." Oh god, it's that group. You see, Luna has three sets of bullies. One bully is a male who tend to do small things like trip her and make fun of her. Another set are two girls who spread rumors about Luna and the last set are three bullies. One girl, two boys. These three get physical...very physical. Luna lived in fear because of them but ever since she met Abyss, her fear went away...but fear always finds its way back. "W-W-What do you guys want?" Luna stuttered, "Oh nothing I'm just here because you know, it's funny to see you all scared." The girl laughed while the two boys whispered among themselves. Luna whimpers, "G-Go away, okay?" "Nah." "Why?" "Because this is our chance now that your boyfriend is out of the way!" They approached Luna. Luna backed away, "N-No! Stay away from me and my b-baby!" "She's pregnant?" The guy asked, "Shut up!" The girl snapped, "Yo we shouldn't do this, she's pregnant." The other guy argued, "Shut it or else!" They groan, "Fine." Luna was shaking in fear at this point. "Grab her." Luna's eyes widen in fear. She lets out a terrified scream as they grab her. One male covered her mouth while the other began to punch her. The female smirked at the sight then approached Luna and kicked her in the stomach. Luna was crying in pain and fear. She was able to create a magic barrier to protect the fragile soul in her stomach...but not for long. They left her in a bloody pulp. The bullies ran away, leaving her in her own blood. Luna coughed out blood and cried. She curled up in a ball, "I-I'm not gonna m-make it...." she knew she wasn't but her baby can...she just needed to find...a way. And she knew one. She began to crawl to a ditch, she knew there was one. She needed to get there. Her magic was dying and if she died then so will her baby. She couldn't bear that fact. She finally made it to the edge of the ditch. She was terrified but she needed to do this. Her magic was draining. Her tears fell to the ground, "Im sorry Abyss....take care of them...I love you..." she fell into the deep ditch, knowing this would be her death... She spun in circles then had a sudden stop... She hit a rock, correction: her head hit a rock. She let out a cry as the bones of her skull went in the hole that was formed. Not only was her head hit but her stomach as well...a sharp rock has pierced the side of her stomach...she quickly felt around and grabbed a near by rock. She began to smash her stomach, the weak magic finally gave up and opened. When it opened, a small soul came out. The soul began to form a body but it was too weak. Luna had little more strength in her, this would kill her but it's worth it. She used her magic to help the baby form. After a while it was finished...there on her chest laid a small baby. She didn't even have time to look at her baby as she began to fade out. All she heard was a scream, "LUNA!" ~~~ Abyss was freaked out. It's been more than an hour and Luna hasn't returned. He was searching for her and hoped to find her but he didn't want to find this sight. He found blood tracks, he recognized the smell...it was Luna's blood. He ran towards the ditch and screamed, "LUNA!" He jumped into the ditch and ran to his dying lover.... He fell to his knees at the sight. He was too late... He was too late to save his baby...his...princess... He gasps once he noticed the baby on her chest. The baby was crying loudly, "Shh shh...." he carried the bundle of joy and looked down at them, "....n-no...." he choked out once he saw Luna's body turning into dust, "L-Luna...n-no please...no!" He screams in agony, "LUNAAAA!" His voice echoed threw the woods, scaring the small baby. The baby cried even louder, "S-Shit! N-No hey, don't cry..shhhh...." he kissed the baby, "I got you...daddy's here...I-I'm here...." the baby calmed down after a couple of seconds. Abyss looked at the pile of dust, all there was left was Luna's cloths and her flower. Abyss grabbed her cloths and hugged it with his free hand, he took in Luna's sweet scent. He was able to put her scarf around his neck. He nuzzles into the scarf, purring softly and sniffling. The scarf smelled just like her, exactly like her...he reached for the flower and kissed it, "L-Luna...." the baby let out a sneeze. Abyss chuckled at the sound and looked down at his baby. "...I'll protect you..." Luna belongs to me Abyss belongs to @6agentgg9 I did this last night at 5 am

#Luna x Abyss #fanfic #angst

4 notes · View notes

go-redgirl · 5 years

Video

Ep. 1050 Trump’s Bold Move. The Dan Bongino Show 8/22/2019.

_______________________________________________________________

INDIVIDUALS/COMMENTS/POSTS:

William Walden William Walden 1 day ago The US Marshals should have taken over the FBI until its integrity could be located.

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REPLY View 86 replies Willy G Willy G 1 day ago Fire Wray, now. Today. Before 5pm

REPLY View reply Marta LeFave Marta LeFave 1 day ago Dan, do not forget that the Left will not hold Biden to account on his lies. To them, the end justifies the means. Remember Obama??

210

REPLY View 20 replies Glenn Holcomb Glenn Holcomb 23 hours ago Wray needs to be replaced. He's holding back items that Judicial Watch has asked for, that will make a difference in the voter's decisions in the election next year for seats in the House.

REPLY View 2 replies Kathy B Kathy B 23 hours ago who was the FISA judge, obviously either incompetent or in on it.

112

REPLY View 9 replies Percy's Percy's 1 day ago Trump should fire Wray!

123

REPLY View 4 replies Gary Gary 23 hours ago FBI's Wray is DIRTY AS HELL Dan, say it!!!

REPLY Bill Simpson Bill Simpson 1 day ago (edited) This is getting SO OLD. The media’s lameass attempts to frame our President as a racist are the last acts of a desperate deep state. 😮 yawning Leader Technologies wrote the code and had it stolen by a Clinton operative in a theft of patent. African American lawyer Screwed the guy from Leader Technologies. Can’t remember the guys name! And that’s AWESOME Dan to provide hopeful reinforcement to those of us struggling with addiction issues. God Bless you brother!! 👍🏻❤️🙏🏻🇺🇸 Read more

REPLY View reply litigator2015 litigator2015 1 day ago (edited) Wray is Deep State for sure. Everytime I see him he has that same smirk on hus face. FIRE Wray

127

REPLY View 11 replies Roberta Grepaly Roberta Grepaly 1 day ago The FBI is just another corrupt organization.

REPLY Marta LeFave Marta LeFave 1 day ago Brennan is at the nucleus of this whole thing. He is the head bad guy at the CIA. He and Clinton got the FBI involved, and then they all acted in unison.

REPLY View 5 replies Robert Duley Robert Duley 23 hours ago Only answer is military trails DOJ and FIB and CIA all in cahoots SEDITION AND TREASON

REPLY View reply Mitch Schneider Mitch Schneider 1 day ago Why doesn't Trump order the FBI to release the info NOW?

REPLY View reply A C Rider A C Rider 23 hours ago Hello, Mr, Wray? This is Attorney General Barr, DOJ. You are aware I am your boss? Yes sir. There has been stalling by the FBI in turning over Muller Dossier documents for at least two years. Is that correct? Yes sir. This is a direct order. I want every document requested or subpoenaed on my desk in two hours! Sir, I can... You are fired! Vacate the building immediately. Marshal's are waiting outside your door. Read more

REPLY View 2 replies Peaches Mcbee Peaches Mcbee 1 day ago Shouldn't barr being kicking wrays butt telling him to give up the goods !!!!!???

REPLY View 8 replies Robert Miller Robert Miller 1 day ago (edited) What about the assassination attempt text between Page and her lover boy Peter

REPLY Jason Lee Jason Lee 1 day ago They call us conspiracy theorists for asking question but they literally come up with a new conspiracy every week.

REPLY View 4 replies TWOHAWK 1 TWOHAWK 1 1 day ago Donald J. Trump should fire Wray Yesterday.

REPLY View 2 replies Charles Daniel Charles Daniel 1 day ago Can Trump and Barr go over to the FBI and tell Wray to handem over ?

REPLY View 2 replies Glenn Ryan Glenn Ryan 23 hours ago The FBI has managed to destroy people’s trust. Wray is only making things worse.

REPLY Proud Patriot Proud Patriot 1 day ago Look into Stephan Halpers father-in-law’s CIA position

REPLY 022141able 022141able 23 hours ago Can't President Trump dismiss Christopher Wray as head of the FBI for not handing over critical information and for protecting those who are responsible for the ongoing coup against the President?

REPLY View 4 replies Shanett Shanett 1 day ago NEVER expect a demorat to be honest. IMAGINE FOX giving Donna Brasille a job since she was probably the least criminal of the bunch!

REPLY View 2 replies Texas Viewpoint Texas Viewpoint 1 day ago (edited) It bothers me that swamp man Chris Ray ever became FBI director in the first place.

REPLY View 3 replies Randy Brisendine Randy Brisendine 1 day ago "When the expectations are so low, you can't be disappointed" Joe Biden: Hold my beer...

REPLY View 2 replies Under Dog Under Dog 1 day ago The New York times and Dems need to face TREASON charges.

REPLY The Kraken The Kraken 1 day ago (edited) Why are all nationalists... white? I know Americans of all races...that want to circle the wagons....and clean house..

REPLY View 3 replies Michael Merlino Michael Merlino 23 hours ago Wasn’t Biden a keynote speaker at Robert Byrd’s funeral?The same KKK recruiter Robert Byrd.

REPLY John Tatum John Tatum 1 day ago (edited) Dems lie because it is the only thing they are good at...they have no honest candidates except maybe Yang. I say sue Biden for slander. Everyone knows that Christopher Wray is just as bad as Comey was.

REPLY View reply Art Jones Art Jones 1 day ago Occam’s Razor: Chris is a member of the Cabal!

REPLY Dwayne Campbell Dwayne Campbell 23 hours ago Bill “Alvin” DeBlasio ... the most famous Chipmunk Actor of all time.

REPLY joshua beatty joshua beatty 23 hours ago Those Jobless Claims Dropped Again The Economy is way to Strong

REPLY K W K W 1 day ago Richard Spencer has worked w Obama in the past!

REPLY Robert Here Robert Here 23 hours ago Joe Biden lied? Again? Who does he think he is....Hillary?

REPLY Eddie Monger Eddie Monger 1 day ago The media Trump haters do not call out any of the lies from any of these candidates.

REPLY View 2 replies kcabyats * kcabyats * 1 day ago Why don't any of the people against joe biden ever bring up that he groped children on tape? Shouldn't that be the first thing people bring up?

REPLY View 5 replies USMCArchAngel03 USMCArchAngel03 1 day ago But we still don't have probable cause to start arresting people at this point????

REPLY Proud Patriot Proud Patriot 1 day ago Dan - Sen Gorka, Sara Carter, and John Solomon had a great discussion on America First today.

REPLY View 2 replies AtomicDog AtomicDog 21 hours ago How quickly we forget the FBI said the text messages were lost and could not be recovered until the inspector general magically found them. The FBI once again proves it is an agency that cannot be trusted from the ground up.

REPLY Duke Milano Duke Milano 22 hours ago Wray is an empty suit. Should be fired.

REPLY rightonQ rightonQ 22 hours ago I ♥️ President Trump ⭐️

Thank You @Dan Bongino 🙏🏻

REPLY William Schutter William Schutter 1 day ago Fair enough. You are bringing me some comfort about "the two-way street."

REPLY Jo Ann Levy Jo Ann Levy 1 day ago Fantastic show Team Bongino!! Dan, Joe, and Paula are the best. Love John Solomon's piece and glad I heard it here first. I hope you all have a great day. Looking forward to seeing you on Hannity. Please I hope, that you don't have to put up with that Chris Hahn jerk. Thanks for keeping it straight for us.

REPLY Coma5 Coma5 22 hours ago I hope Barr has an honest, and eventually transparent, reason for allowing Wray to protect the criminals.

REPLY Maryann Weldin Maryann Weldin 23 hours ago Our bloated government can’t manage their way out of a paper bag.

REPLY Marta LeFave Marta LeFave 1 day ago Wray is as corrupt as Comey, Brennan, Clinton and Obama. he covered up all the lies he were taking place, and he would love to see this drag on forever so they could destroy Trump if he is reelected.

REPLY View reply Greg White Greg White 23 hours ago I hope Honorable AG Barr exposes this to the public before the election.

REPLY Yardvarks Lawn Care Yardvarks Lawn Care 22 hours ago Im 2 years sober! Thank you for the very kind words Dan! Love you

REPLY y2rock y2rock 23 hours ago 11:30 Wray must be fired YESTERDAY!

Where is AG Barr???

REPLY Ginger OConnell Ginger OConnell 1 day ago Should be find the info or go to jail...bet they would suddenly turn up.

REPLY Prentiss Campbell Prentiss Campbell 1 day ago The liberal ship is in flames however the democrat scumbags bucket brigade keep it from going under........eventually it will go under.

REPLY Big Colt Big Colt 23 hours ago What is Joe doing out on the street if it's common knowledge he robbed a bank?

REPLY Chuck Rogers Chuck Rogers 1 day ago Grab your popcorn, He's Back!👍 D-DAY💪 Dan Bonginos EXPLOSION💥 NEWS👏👏👏👏👏👏

REPLY Mary Ellen Ledesma Mary Ellen Ledesma 1 day ago Dan....Joe Biden has never had one time where he has had an actual thought on his own and has always mimicked the words and thoughts of others. His team actually thinks it’s the only way he can win. Joe beware of the Trump curse.

REPLY View reply Jeff Curtis Jeff Curtis 1 day ago I think President Trump was responsible for Terisa May's resignation recently and partly responsible for Boris Johnson's election to Prime Minister. Why do I say that? It leads the way open to both Steele and Dearlove being eventually extradited to the US to face charges relating to the Fake Steele Dossier and the unlawful spying related to it.

REPLY Sandra Stob Sandra Stob 23 hours ago You're forgetting one fact. The 14th Amendment was written to provide citizenship for the freed slaves.

REPLY View reply MeeMee48 LaRue MeeMee48 LaRue 1 day ago Another great job on the crap that is going on in the deep state. I miss these shows on the weekends. The Dan team is one of the best!! MAGA KAG 2020 🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸

REPLY Patrick McCarthy Patrick McCarthy 22 hours ago They,re all corrupt crooks in the Cabal, But I'll bet none of them will be brought to Justice. They act like they're above the Law because they know they are..

REPLY Cig Guard Cig Guard 20 hours ago (edited) SO! WHY NOT MORE TALK ABOUT: BIDENS MONETARY CONNECTIONS TO; CHINA, CRIMIA, RUSSIA, ETC.... COMPLETE EXPOSURE!

REPLY DM Decor DM Decor 1 day ago Dan, What does Wray have to do with all of this? Why is he covering up anything? Where do you think he fits in?

REPLY Russ Turner Russ Turner 23 hours ago Dan there's been no doubt about what happened in the intelligence agencies to try and overthrow president Trump's election, I can't see how anybody, left or right dosent find this unacceptable.

REPLY View reply Robbo Robertson Robbo Robertson 23 hours ago I think AG Barr should remove the FBI from any part of the investigations and place it in the hands of Military intelligence agencies until the FBI is fully exonerated, all this withholding info by the FBI is doing to much damage to what was once the greatest law enforcement agency in the world

REPLY View reply Michele Prince Michele Prince 21 hours ago Prayers for Eric Littlejohn, God Bless you Eric and speed your recovery.

REPLY Notime ForFakeNews Notime ForFakeNews 23 hours ago (edited) "Change those batteries Joe" A triple Muttley. 😄

We knew 2 yrs ago Trump was set-up. Now we are 100% convinced President Trump was slandered & spied on by his/our own government. 🇺🇸

REPLY View reply Dan Erickson Dan Erickson 23 hours ago Trump 2020 make liberals cry again!!!!

REPLY Deeges909 Deeges909 17 hours ago Dan is sincerely the Man. I’ve never heard a talk show host take time and speak to those suffering from addiction and actually feel like he 1000% means it. 👍🏼

REPLY Sandy Hardin Sandy Hardin 1 day ago Thank God President Trump understand the Constitution, on baby from illegal immigrants should be an American citizen!👍🎈🇺🇸😉

REPLY Rocky roads Rocky roads 18 hours ago We used to make fun of the inquire magazine. Now almost all the news outlets are dramatic joke

REPLY chocolate* chocolate* 23 hours ago It's not a political democrat party anymore, they are now just a three ring circus. The left speaks so much nonsense they don't know which way is up

REPLY View reply James Kennedy James Kennedy 1 day ago Go ahead ask me about government? We are losing our representation. Dangling by a thread our representation. Yep we voted them in? And then they lay waste my vote. After elected they make every address to special interest. I did not vote for socialism. I did not vote for communist. The four & More have corrupted my good vote!!!

REPLY Charles Marais Charles Marais 23 hours ago Wow, this is an intricate web of deceit, this Russian hoax. It sounds like a Len Deighton spy novel.

REPLY snuka_ 420 snuka_ 420 23 hours ago Dan.... Check out that's the point!!! With Brandon .. he has some troubling videos on ANTIFA in Portland... He's a true Patriot and needs our support

REPLY Jimmy Diamond Jimmy Diamond 21 hours ago Why isn't Trump making the FBI comply with giving over the EMails

REPLY CoryKickzAss CoryKickzAss 23 hours ago Idk about "Uncle Joe".. I never had an uncle like that (who gropes kids and women openly on camera)

REPLY View 2 replies Gina warrior princess Gina warrior princess 22 hours ago Lol Joe ,you supported the biggest Hoax candidate in American history and escorted the Trojan horse! We do not give you a pass or forget! #notplayingwithafulldeck.

REPLY Stjepan Blagaj Stjepan Blagaj 23 hours ago well they will try anything that can make headlines Dems a scums period

REPLY Mark DeMedeiros Mark DeMedeiros 23 hours ago I've got to get more pens to scratch my head with. :((( #64 in Cali

REPLY Daniel Gorbea Daniel Gorbea 21 hours ago Wait! Isn't it the 4 R's of radical leftism? Russia, Racism, Reparations, and now Recession!

REPLY Ed Felty Ed Felty 1 day ago Now it's "Trump is the anti-Christ" according to CNN. 🤣 🇺🇸

REPLY View 3 replies Bunk Stagner Bunk Stagner 23 hours ago Daffy Duck is the Mayor of new York?

REPLY View reply Bobby H Bobby H 23 hours ago Yet another superb and insightful show, Dan - God bless

REPLY Tim Grun Tim Grun 23 hours ago Biden sounds like an old drunk that can't dictate his words correctly.

REPLY View reply Matthew Chenevert Matthew Chenevert 22 hours ago Bucket list for me is fight Deniro in a PPV event for charity. UFC style.

REPLY beeveedee beeveedee 22 hours ago The "under jurisdiction" clause would be problematic for Kamala Harris, and would disqualify her presidential candidacy!

REPLY DEWY FROM KNOXVILLE. DEWY FROM KNOXVILLE. 22 hours ago Dan, thank GOD, We have patriots like You, AND the People You surround yourself with!!!! Keep the Truth coming!!! ............ Peace!!!

REPLY skynebula11 skynebula11 23 hours ago De blasio....did someone pump helium in the room?

REPLY View reply Yves Jasmin Yves Jasmin 23 hours ago Chris Wray is part of the deep state

REPLY roninreturns roninreturns 21 hours ago Bill DeBlasio gets Munchkin tough: "We'd like to welcome you to Lollipop Land, Lollipop Land..."

REPLY Dr S&W Dr S&W 23 hours ago You have to admit its fun watching sleepy Joe nap at the podium.

REPLY Charlie S Charlie S 19 hours ago Why isn't Barr charging Wray with obstruction of justice???

REPLY Jason Hay Jason Hay 1 day ago Poor Joe, robbed lots of banks. Better watch in case the FBI may do some work! Unbelievable! Keep it up Dan, Paula and Joe! Love from the UK!

REPLY Leslie Powell Leslie Powell 21 hours ago Yeah. Joe is a good ol KKK Democrat. His friend and mentor was like, a wizard or a grand dragon. Thanks.

REPLY Ken Walter Ken Walter 1 day ago (edited) Unfortunately by now those emails between Strozk and Page have probably joined HRC's emails in disappearing.

REPLY View 4 replies Arthur Fricchione Arthur Fricchione 23 hours ago Another good episode Dan. Keep them coming. Nice to hear the truth and I know you are telling us the truth. ❤️

REPLY Eli G Eli G 23 hours ago Calling the media conspiracy theorists is far to kind

They have an agenda and are on a side, the left , the dems , the media , Hollywood , social media platforms they are all controlled by the same entity and whoever and whatever it is wants to destroy America and Americans and lots of us are working for and voting for our own destruction

REPLY tomk1tl tomk1tl 23 hours ago DeBlasio must have found the "helium tank" apparently......

REPLY Jen Blossom Jen Blossom 21 hours ago (edited) That was truly God showing his good humor during Bill DeBlasio’s video.

REPLY Jim's Inkspot Jim's Inkspot 10 hours ago Dan you need to pay Joe more so he doesn't have to keep robbing Banks : ) That's gonna come back to bite him!

REPLY Canis Lupus Canis Lupus 23 hours ago Over at JW watching the LIVE premiere video of the Arwan brothers and DNC Debbie Wasserman Schultz and the stealing of Congressional info...... be back in a hour to finish this video 😁

REPLY Daniel Kahawaii Daniel Kahawaii 22 hours ago Thank You. Prayers to the suffering. Love to those praying.

REPLY Philip Schroeder Philip Schroeder 22 hours ago The far left are full of bologna. Along with the fake news. Great show Mr. Dan and Mr. Joe and Mrs. Bongino.

REPLY Michael Smith Michael Smith 22 hours ago Thanks Dan I really appreciate you saying that at the end of the podcast

REPLY Smitty Smitty Smitty Smitty 23 hours ago Joe Biden that's a Muggsy moment in itself that deserves a quintuple mutsy laugh

REPLY BethAnn Torres BethAnn Torres 23 hours ago What in they hell is wrong with lunch bucket Joe?! 😳.... well🙄😂

REPLY My Peace Of Heaven My Peace Of Heaven 22 hours ago Thank you Dan! Always the most Informative and entertaining video of my day !

REPLY Eric Trau Eric Trau 22 hours ago Thanks Dan Paula and Joe, can't let a weekday go by without my daily dose of Bongino!

REPLY Reggie Abernethy Reggie Abernethy 20 hours ago And so? Where’s AG Barr? Apparently he’s stalling,too. Losing confidence in the AG.

REPLY dacosta0656 dacosta0656 22 hours ago (edited) Xerox worked with arpa and darpa, international business machines did too

REPLY Sonia Szenay Sonia Szenay 21 hours ago God works in mysterious ways Bellagio God did that change his voice

REPLY Mark Jubinville Mark Jubinville 1 day ago collect your thoughts and spit the idea out. convolution is your enemy in delivering the message.

REPLY Peter Bergeris Peter Bergeris 1 day ago Dan I listened to your report regarding Steele n fbi. #BCP told the same info which I didn't catch till evening when he released it, but he's in calif n I'm in pa.

REPLY View reply Lisa Hause Lisa Hause 23 hours ago “LYING JOE BIDEN” . . . CREEPY - SLEEPY - LYING - OLD BIDEN!!! Thanks, DAN, Paula & Joe...🥰 🇺🇸👍🏻

REPLY Shawn C Shawn C 1 day ago Man you have finally convinced me, Joe's a bank robber.

REPLY View 2 replies sunboyfun sunboyfun 22 hours ago Sounded like you said in the last piece, a "farce fire", with respect to liberals. Great pun if intended or not!

REPLY JRodInc3 JRodInc3 20 hours ago Election meddling, just look to our FBI. Seems there were many government agencies, politicians and big tech were meddling in our elections, just not Trump.

REPLY IMA WAKE 2 IMA WAKE 2 1 day ago "Most hard core liberals have psychologically deprived backgrounds which causes them to invoke defense mechanisms which causes them to seek power over others and develop a “wounded” world view which causes them to express the depths of their psychologically damaged personality."

"Liberals are exercising power over others that have achieved legitimate success and they are trying to get the achievers of society to pay for these often phony liberal causes. This gives the liberal a sense of entitlement to act out against the successful among us and take what is not theirs. This helps to restore feelings of power to the liberal that they lacked in their deprived childhoods which are typically characterized by neglect."

"In the deprived psychological environment that characterizes so many liberals, they are typically angry at the world. And they often seek to inflict pain on the successful because they are angry. This defense mechanism is called displacement. They just don’t want to dominate the political narrative, they seek to inflict pain on a personal level to those who have experienced success. This is what fundamentally causes liberals to lack respect for the rule of law and just old-fashioned human decency. They seek to hurt successful people and to tear down the pillars of society."

"The left uses their self-contrived and often invented self-indignation as the excuse to justify inflicting pain on others. Rationalization is defined as making excuses to justify one’s actions. This is also the well-spring of almost all genocide, both past and present in a “they deserved it mentality."

"There is a final defense mechanism that liberals often employ. Because of their psychologically deprived background, we frequently see use of the defense mechanism called overcompensation. This is where an individual will perceive some personal deficiency (eg lack of academic success) and then seek to excel in another area (eg athletic prowess). In the case of a mentally ill liberal, their lack of personal success and acceptance from their peers, in their collective childhoods, leads them to excel in other areas, namely, liberal causes which frequently inflicts pain on successful people."

"Liberals are largely representative of people who have been psychologically wounded by life and they spend their adult life getting back at the very power structure that they blame for their psychological pain as a result of their own personal shortcomings.

Why do liberals not respect the sanctity of life (eg late-term abortions)? Their psychological pain keeps them from feeling empathy by the youngest members of our society as they are torn apart limb by limb for their body parts. Do I need to point out the reaction formation of liberal females who are overcompensating for their perceived personal rejection. Beautiful women come in all shapes and sizes and I don’t typically promote stereotypes, but ask a non-liberal male about the appearance of many liberal females. Many times, it borders on bizarre. The same can be said for the emasculated males who grew up expecting trophies for participation, instead of achievement. And when achievement does not come, liberal causes designed to illegitimately redistribute wealth becomes a frequent mantra from the left.

On the surface, liberal causes makes no sense. Their behavior makes no sense until one realizes that we are dealing with damaged individuals whose internal anger causes them to seek to bring harm others under the guise of performing some twisted form of justice (ie social justice).

At the end of the day, these psychologically impaired people make good warriors for the global elite. They are actively working to tear down the family, destroying Christianity and taking down America on behalf of the elite who want one-world government that the elite controls. In short, at the end of the day, liberals again find themselves being abused as they are relegated to the role of useful idiots for the express purposes of the Satanic mentality that underlies those who would subjugate all of us on a global scale."

"These useful idiots (liberals) would do well to examine the fate of people like the Brown-shirts of Nazi Germany. Their fate is the fate of useful idiots. If and when the global elite ever seizes total control over the planet, they will have no use for liberals. Being a liberal will have a very short shelf-life under the New World Order’s authority where a rebellious and psychologically damaged mind will not be tolerated by a totalitarian regime." Read more

REPLY View 3 replies Robert Boyle Robert Boyle 22 hours ago Joe biden makes me sick..his lying will catch up with him someday...

REPLY scratchnsniff 64 scratchnsniff 64 20 hours ago Joe diGenova has told that Christopher Wray is in a partnered law firm with Sally Yates.

REPLY king mopar king mopar 20 hours ago It’s time for either peaceful separation meaning G we split the country..or it’s time for the civil war..this can not continue

REPLY Tim Grun Tim Grun 23 hours ago Dan, Joe, and Paula = The "Chosen Ones" to bring me the news!

REPLY Kris Nordberg Kris Nordberg 22 hours ago The past few times I've tried to watch Hannity, his full length show is :02 seconds. Come on YouTube, tell me you're not biased. Is he getting to close to the truth?

REPLY Yama Kazoo Yama Kazoo 4 hours ago Dan!! The word is EPOCH not "Epic". EEEEEE POCH. The EEEE POK Times.

REPLY MrOramato MrOramato 22 hours ago (edited) Don’t forget the Rape accusations that mysteriously went away after the election. So it is four or five Rs. And on their side it is Resistance. So the Left is stuck ON “R.”

REPLY April Davis April Davis 22 hours ago Dan you are always right up front on my daily feed!

REPLY RV RV 18 hours ago All the Russia setup was to send Trump and his family members to prison. Unfortunate for the left, he won the election... and all is being exposed of the crime they have committed.

REPLY randy ropac 23 hours ago Just started listening. Great show. The LEGAL Canadian. Randy Ropac

REPLY y2rock 23 hours ago 9:45 Trump should bring a big lawsuit on Biden

REPLY Steph 23 hours ago I want to believe you, Dan, but I just don't see those texts ever coming out from the FBI.

REPLY steven donnelly 20 hours ago That means Kamal Harris is not a citizen, period.

REPLY Mark Gatz 22 hours ago Thanks, Dan always very informative and eye opening. I just wish there was a way to take a cattle prod to the FBI Director (figuratively speaking of course) to release the information before 2020 election.

REPLY Randell Stevens 1 hour ago Dan you forget the part of the 14th amendment that expressly DENIED citizenship to Native Americans. If I recall correctly it stated that they were under the jurisdiction of their tribe & not under the juridstiction of the USA.

REPLY L Russell 1 day ago It is funny to think of big burly dude in the aflcio --funny

REPLY Raylene Strand 21 hours ago Did anybody notice that nobody applauded when Bill the Blasio was announced

REPLY Truth Shrugs 19 hours ago Dan, 1) Why don't you hear anyone talking about Assange lately? 2) Why don't you hear a word about Admiral Rogers (former head of NSA under Obama/Trump) regarding all of the RUSSIA RUSSIA RUSSIA narrative? 3) Why is Wray slow-playing/stalling the release of requested info?

I'll tell you why.. 1) Because Assange is key to this whole Russia story and US Atty. Durham is retrieving all kinds of fascinating info from Assange (think Seth Rich... "hacked" DNC emails (blame RUSSIA)...). 2) Admiral Rogers is a true patriot and saw what was occurring against (future) President Trump and logged everything (perhaps "mislabeled" to avoid cleanup by the corrupt Intelligence Community under Obama?). You can bet he's chatting with Durham too. 3) Because of Durham's ongoing investigation and they don't want to announce that publicly because that then confirms there is even an investigation into certain people to begin with. Keep it all under wraps until Durham is ready to start handing down indictments.

They have nowhere to go. The walls are closing in and the American people are going to see a miraculous show this fall and through the next year. Justice is coming. Read more

REPLY MissChievousRN 15 hours ago (edited) Thank heavens he didn't laugh... PeeWee DeBlasio!!😂

REPLY Mark Ellars 23 hours ago Hi Dan Here in northeastern Ohio the three r's are, reading , writing and the route to Cleveland.

REPLY Joe Allen 23 hours ago Damn your a good dude Dan. Move to AZ and run this state for the next 30 yrs. We could use you

REPLY Rocky roads 18 hours ago Did no one think that these people were going to do this they've had 2 years to clean this all up! But wait our government wouldn't hide this stuff from us would they? Hmmmmm

REPLY martha schnapp 18 hours ago Christopher Wray is covering up for FBI

REPLY Norwood Partz 21 hours ago Why is Drudge Report working so hard to collapse the economy?

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failinginvestigativejournalist · 7 years

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Dont freak out, itss just writing

i grew up fast (so fast) (too quick nigga) (wish i went through when i was just a bit bigger) can you tell me who the parent is uh ya the first time i drove a whip i was a fuckin kid, (96 suburban nigga) (yo yo, did you tell em why) oh ya shit my fault my mom was bleeding from her chin i dont know what from or what about, scared to death i took that drive to the ER (Medical SHIIIT) (mom got too drunk again and feel out) (wheres dad? in his room his doors locked, figures i dont expect, as i try to knock (no answer nigga) i dont blame em he removes himself from the sitiation so he dont hit her) ya i fucking grew quick, ya i fucking tryed some shit, the first time i dropped out and took some shroomies i was age 6 plus 6, thats 12 for the illiterates, actually aas a matter a fact it was fuckin pleasant as fuck as i drew back the droe and took another hit. now that i think that was the day, older brother came and gave me cig i obliged no way to say nay, i was still trippin and it was a sensational feelin, it left me stumblin and dizzy a head rush like no other i was hooked for live to the day and i dont blame him, i dont think he knew what he had started, adding to the compilation of the monsxter inside that took refuge and started, poison in his mind, the drugs altered his brain activity but he was buckled up and commited to the ride.Shit i just said in third person let me apologize to yall sometimes the ideas flow together like two fortune five mergin, these feels of hate be strong ya im hurtin, i cant blame no one, i cant choose the family i was birthed in, started sniffin ups felt my blood surgin, gotta big head but my nemisis, the evil inside myself was bigger aboutt the size of a white sturgeon, like some northern ish that canadain shit like british columbia or somethin idk, alls i can say is that BC bud out that bitch is my fav to blow, the sour D, diesel to be exact for you niggas who waana try to nit pick or correct my personal facts, let me just speak at you, all the hatin niggas tryin bring me down, bad news, i do drugs like steve from fuckin blues clues, but my rents always on time when that xshits due, any ways i side tracked speaking of tracks just lined some shit up did with speed did with need i did it with tact, im dextrous and shit i always have a unique train of thought oh shit trains again trains derailed at this point hhaaha i crack myself up sometimes with the wit in my words leh-let you in on the pun so you can join in my fun, about the lines the lines are no more you didn arrive in time i promise these raps have rhythm they have rhyme i aint spittin to waste your time, i aint spittin to catch a dime, bag or bitch, it really dont matter, niether last long but they are still my niche, come here bitch come hit this shit, this time dont have a fit, mind over matter just stick yuh nose in these rails sit down for a bit, drink some wata, go to your happy place we are gettin to old for me to have tote on yuh just from hitten lines but i put up wit it, you got that 50 thou boat on yuh, not to mention your ride, that shit is so sweet i cant decidddee which id rather seed, as in inseminate with my seaman as i play the part as a seaman workin for seimans on a marine voyage i aint like you im a higher being, i dont know whatchu talkin whatch your eyes be seein i am a divine heathan i really cant fucking believe a niggas still breathin im a florida boy born and raised, i sit the fuck back drink my beer in the shade, high as i usually am a rinny tin tin rinscotts tale \down the rintin like a shark fin poatched by commercial fisherman thrown in a bin, no regard for life the human race is so greedy, people just aint my type, say what you want i know me best and i know im right. my creative talents on the other hand be outta sight, im my own worst enemy to cross the bridge pay the fee, trollin in the hood for that g, withdrawin, shakin i drop to my knee look up to the sky ask god if he sees. hear the sound of humming, huh must be bees, or im trippin out maybe its a flash back i dont remmember. whats th-this street, tremblin think my heat skipped a bit, or a couple shakinso bad my knes begin to buckle, anxiety can be dibilatated held me back from so much in life thers no debating. unfamiliar route. made it to this bar ordered a stout got to thinking, you may ask what about, this is why i like solitude to be on my own to answer to noone to depend on myself and live it to the fullest while im yung, my mind will reel, replaying all i know every single memory, that im capable of bringing back, i compare my brain to a file cabinet, i keep it hidden like in an office towards the back. A photographic memory is a gift and a curse, ill tell you whatat, if you dont keep it in check you will end up in a herse, sure you can remember the happy shit the good things in your life but you cant fucking forget the huge hits the fucking bad bitch the one who broke your heart? dounno how to forget you but i think i know where to start, i thought it was drugs, i numbed my body with chemicals little did i know with every shot the metaphorical shovel scooped out some more dirt from the inconcievable whole i fuckin dug. my life has been weird kinda like an opriental from a flee market an awkward rug, with no real spot in the house, was always the black sheep in the fam i tryed to tip toe as quiet as a mouse, some tom and jerry shit my mistakes and regrets cbhasing me around like tom the cat from that shit, I hide in my hidey whole, disconeected from any social environmeent i often found myself cryin, but self loathin is kinda like being a a gay with some dicks hes blowin, givin a ski job pitty is the lube hatred is the tube the vessel to carry out a deed the fags not sure about, hes experimentin comparable to some situations in my life cept wont catch me with two dudes in a shower, that was just a metaphor. you feel me? im sure the haters will hop all over that verse but just fuckinh hear me. I got my shades on and these bitches special, haters they block, they keep you no fun, sticklers out of sight out of mind like spf 75 sun block, that industrial shit, factory born hear the lunch bell on the horn, an hour passes the busy bees come back to the floor to join the others to join the masses; the hoard., here the hum of the worker bees at work as they sneek rum in there flasks stuck it in to the hive got it past the queen time to catch a buzz to make this pain stop while i avoid the fuzz the narks at work, cant control it even if they wanted to stop. i dont want to hurt. this was a metaphor for the endless rut of a reality ive become accustomed to; succomed too, the low of the low. comparable to a german trench on the frontlines., my life feels like a conveyer belt, makin the same product running the same direction never really goiong any where, now thats was an analagy, keeping up? yung unsensitive how many? 0 fucks, 0 fucks giveen, 0 blights forgiven, spiteful to death and mornful for noone, nothing left inside just another no-go, malfunctioning product family be like feeling “ i feel like they robbed us” of our brother our son and our friend , dont worry fam im still with you in your hearts up to the end. im tired of our society with all its malice and fallacy, thinking to my self how sad it must be, to be washed in the brain to be hypnotized, this shits so insane.you want that shit super sized? of course nigga watchu you sayin. A glutonous society obsessed with self indulgence people actually still believe good people are in abundance. Speaking of which, fuck the people for a tec, have you looked around lately, this earth is a wreck, mark my words we headin straight for destruction, We are not being good care takers, we fuckckin actin so careless what doesdo the opeople in power really expect?? just pass it on to the next generation “ohh, its not our life time we will leave it for you” Thats a big fuck you to the generations after you undeserving self entitled fucks finallyy croak. get the fuck outa here, tell me when you sold your sold, you heartlesxs bastards would give anything for xsome more of that paper thgat rules all, the pressure you have put on everyone, no one is an exception, to support ourselves and loved ones to provide for our own and multiple other peoples nees, the urge to make money looms over our heads like a pestiliant storm cloud of angst and uncertainty, boreing a fucking whole in our moral, making peoplpe desperaate rising crime rates because people get desperate, people need to survive and they will do dam near whatever it takess to make the money they need, for whatever purpose. ill whipe my ass with it throw in your cards i will win you better fold. i have freeedom, you ask what? anominity you fuckers, i can moldd my own life i have the freedomm of choosing, i certainly dont have to wait for legislation to pass a bill which you bribed for votes to do so anyways, to do something something much worse than im capabloe of ever doing, intentionally ruining the environment and turning our planet to mars just for paper with and idea (with a “hey, take our word for it, its worth something “””WE PROMISE”””” fucks) behind it not even gold bars, fuck you niggas mark my words illl bring all you mother fuckers down, ill run you fucks out of town, you hear that sound? its a train. its my passion and my determination to take you out, maybe ill use a fuckin plane? i mean its o.k. for the CIA to do it, right? Create this ridiculously elaborote ruse this plot, thyat fucking fooled all the ignorant and brainwashed americans you have already sucked in with your cancerous propaganda, kids lost to your bullshit through social media and the fucking criteria you make teachers teach young minds, we are taught from a very young age that “ huraaahh america is number one! Terrorists bad! Environmental destruction of a planet good!” how about we help some of the third woorld countries (which you know we wouldnt have to be gunning down women and children in the streets) we could just like give them the water they need? help them gentrify there communities teach them how to develop better skills, teach them more efficient ways to take advantage of their land, maybe bring some seeds to food sources that can be grown creating a bit of self sustainability that may not be indigenous but would grow in their country?? you greedy fucks just want oil, when we have enough in our reserves in alaska/canada to last north america 500 years falsey blame others, create an imaginary war “the war on terrorism, which infact is a fucking cover a false entity, to entice patriotism to loosely keep this crumbling empire together the last attempt, the only thread left in the button holding up the pants we call america, you forgot to tell the word all that shit is just whack [ simply a meticulously pplanned and executed ploy to spur interests in the middle east, control the oil and power will return back east, return to u, Cause god knows you tax the fuck out of us for EVERYTHING especially mnother fucking gas, so we can pay for wellfare and pay for fucking solar power for rich fucks who e==inherited wealth, people who hdont know what working a day means and never will be, never had a problem, never been broke “oh shit my fucking croket set is missingg a ball” lose the pretense fuckers, you cocksuckers, arrogant low lives.. Money makes you any better then the hard working man that cover your tax breaks pay like our fucking ppolice forces (who are a bunch of ROTC drop outs with a badge and sense of power nnow being unfair and crooked taking some kind of revenge on the idea of the kids who picked on them all through out school” Motherfucker its harder to become a plumber, the learning and process is longer/more rigorous then a 6 month police academy which is fucking my lil pony world ( ith ink there is a fantasy kids show for my lil pony with their own fantasy dimension/world)compared to a military bootcamp. A doctrine instilled to stop the spread of communisim wherever and whenever it may presenet itsxelf? when is the fighting going to stop in that area of our dying earth, thjey have been fighting eachother since lifes initial birth, what whoever was in power or in charge of trading the petroleumn to us wanted to charge an extra dollar 4 dollars aBARREL instead of 3??? whaa you fucking greedy cunts,? so we invade and take control put there people on dog collars?? for wshat a dollar difference in productionfreedom of speech as you mothers suck the livlyhood from our home like a blood sucking leech, so careless, you know exactly what your doing, you just dont care it aint your problem your headin towardcs the end your death is brewin, well im the reaper of death cloaked in black i always get my man like a cold inwe can hardly co-exist and efficiently function. We are on world one love bob marley shit im getting tired of going throught the motions im all fucked up inside and shit. Early development can be a lynch pin. to either set a strong first corner stone, ceremonial placement of the first corner stone, free mason shit, corn and vegetable oil, so many customs and traditions are goin down a fuckin hill catch em rollin. Early life is so fucking critical for a young kid, childrens minds are like a sponge they are looking up to their elders they are developing mentally they consume everything around them and retain more than you know, give your kids a healthy and stimulating environment and they will let there talents grow let there talents show let there brilliance flow let there inhibitions go, gone like dust in the wind, never catch em in trouble nothing, not one sin. They will begin to get older, be super organized, super focused for school, every class haxs a folder. As you watch them grow you will feel it in your heart you will fuckin kno, atleast you did this at least you used your parental guidance for good. when you die you know youll be missed, your kid dont throw fits, not one bit, hes such a chip off the old block that was cliche as fuck haha tuck em inh for bed his forhead you kiss. I just might fucking shed a tear, I cant fight this urge to drink a beer. I cant deny this fucking fear, I must look like just like headlights shinin onm a deer, jock strap aroun d my ankles, dumbfounded, look in my eyes, perplexed, look on my face as it hits, you get a certain taste in your mouth this race is coming to a close suddenly your filled with doubht, seriously you should be care free, yuou did your duty as a parent, im jealous wish that was me, chill the fuck out go drink some fucking relaxing tea or something, sobrietyy seems to be a good mixture along with love and rationality to make a family function like a well greased machine, like a mechanisim freshly whipped down with some white lithium grease. tuned and ready to go, temped to huff the fumes and left everything go, turn your car on shut the garage door, let death grip you, dont seem to care anymore, I cant change the past and i have no regreats, will i make it to thirty? “right over here people!” “place your bets!”, ill take my tickets to my Life Show and just scalp em make some extra cash, im already absent, so detatched;incapable of feeling. even if im there aint nothing going on emotionally in there (guarantee you im smilin an nodding i really dont give 2 fucks no more”, take that money right to the plug i promote fucking drugs not hugs, or why not both? why does the saying have to be one or the other when sxometimes its both you desire the most. Take the scalpin’ money from the tickets to the play of my life, go on down to the hood, pick up some bags mis amigos habla “Drogas” los hermanos tambien, this urge is hard to fight. Its a romance [a ritual of being, so0mething un explainable i wish i was never a part of, im always metaphorically bleeding. My poker face is strong, fuck showing weakness i alwayxs thought it was to show emotuion. wrong....... but its not, it can save your life, can \get you through, throw you a life jacket, get you out of that tide you fought, that frigid water no warmer than dry eyes.. Ive always been a loose cannon, I go with the flow, not lookin back, been chillin with the old heads they were suprisxed i could hang and, back to the point haha literally or figuratively is the question... im not gonna keep you waitin or leave yall hangin, i hate cliff hangers, make me wait 45 five minutes leave me jonesin’ its slow goin like grindin that ‘crete in the hangers polishin’ that baby out and coatin with some apoxy, its a process, i just get my drugs, whate=vers around and hit bangersz til i pass out, thatsx how my life has been goingg, i feel like im in the chambers just waiting to be gassed out. Flip the fuuckin switch you fuckin pussy end all this malcontent and hate, make itt black, eternal reest at loast.. dress me up real nice maybe a sharp vest, go through the processions and go through the motions fucking burn my body bitches, i want to be in the ocean ive always felt drawn to it, like an unexplainable,, unatainable unfakeable feeling or notion. im happiest sippin a coctail right by the ocean, thats where you put me to rest... ill be pissed as fuck dont treat me like a fucking ruck; i beenn aroound, age is but a number, my knowledge is vast and profound, ya thats right bitch im fuckin educated, know more tthan you will learn in your life time and im 20 years, old get what im sayin? i dont got a big heaad im actually humble, just at my breaking point. if i was a volcanoe you would feel the rumble; the pre-emptive signs of an eruption pre-determineed in the creator’s mind he took his divine time to find a wayy to grin away the time it took to find the book i bind when al i want is to be stress free and unwind but im the opposite wound up liike the grandfather clock i wish i could stop , the wheels are in motion the gears are set to full speed the feels keep comin i got this itch; this notion, this inkling to stop minglin, stop wastin my time with u useless fuccks. i think its time, its not the end my journey, just started this epic tale of sorrow, my feelings have departed, im fuckingg frozen over colder than ice, dry ice. cant touch me im full of hate and vice, addictive personality on a suicide mission like a ffucking missionary willing to die for his faithh,. i wish man willing to be a martyr for his religion.. ya bitch i smoke stoges in the hotel room just send the bill to him if it comes to me itll end up in the fucking rubbish bin with a looggie on top coughin up brown shit to young for that talk, to young for heart disease pack and a half a day to try to keep my miind at ease, the stress is buildin im like a tickin time bomb, im so wound up like a clock rigged to blow mount vesuvius, a test nuke... the alarm is soundinn off. A bright flash like a million lightning strikes, bout to pop off.. but atleast with style got my limited eddition nikes, listen to me i soound like them, listen to me bitching like a fucking fem, bottle it up, thats what society saays, male suicide is at an all time high like two polar opposites due to wed, its never gonna work im always going to be sad im always going to hurt, no fuck it, im a lock it up and throw away the key, im gonna forget about all this shit and be a fuckin G, be hardcore like the brothhers, leave bitches cryin in the street like aall our fuckin mothers, 32 degrees ferenhiet tatted on my left pec it signifies the tempture of my heart no longer warm and red, its frozen over, it hardly beats, that shit is smaler than the grinches, i turned into what they want me to be, a danger to society, getthe fuck outa myface before i shoo,t b, I got nothing to lose, living for nothing, nada, goose eggs nigga dont give a fuck reckless, no regard for life i dont give two fucks a partridge in a ghetto street, aint no merry christmas song, i like my biches thick and dirty wearin'n some fesh tomy thongs, i use em abuse and enthuse them then ruse thm excusse them fuckin confusethem "why you so distaant all of the suden" keep the vow of silence, like a monk on a holy missio, a friar on a divine quest, sending telepathic messages look into my eyes and see, get the fuck out i was never real these feelings meant nothing to me manipulator, manipulationist making up woprds never been a relationist, the masster of his craft a ventrilliquist or a puppet master you were to blind to see, mama was right just a socio path, ya bitch tell your 7 year old child that; see how long his chipper attitude lasts, im lower than nothing, not even a worm maybe i could bbe a fucking tick suckin blood, noting left of the kid i used to be, no more self worth, i cant love you when i cant love myself, how you expect me to support you when all i do is grab a spoon andd melt all the money thaat comes my way, a junkie, bum destined for an early death and you think yous my bride to be, sorry hun you reaad me wrong, i know its hard cause bitches never know whats goin on inside my head, as i lay in bea,d staring off to somewhere, anywhere but next toyou, staring off into space thinking about my drug abuse, asking myself why, but i know the answer ready to die, but i think ill get a lapper frm one more danceer, i wanna go out in style, not som lame shit maybe go up to a mountain and stand on a cliff, look down, see wher im destined to end up as i take the safety off, finger carressing the trigger, a cool wind blows as i prepare to leave my loved ones bitter, surprised they sstayed aound thislong only ever let em down ever since i was young, never good enough always disappointing this rap comes so easily writing it like noothing, to get this off my chest as theend comes near, i shaped my own destiny i chose to die, now i chose to die here, fuk your beliefs and your faith in gods plan i took my life intomy own fucking hands, i think we all know einstiens theory of insanity, i been doin the same shit fr so long now exspectin shit to change and, i guess im insane.. i took my brilliiant, my sharp mind and put it to waste. its time to pull the inevitable, the good die young idk in this case if thats viable, im scummy i did whatever it took to get my fix to kill that pitt in my tummy. i hurt people close, i stole from my famil.y.. its time to end it, like i caqme into the world, by myself always alone, soemthing that my father toldme that really stuck, its cynical as fuck, but he was right. he said stay out of the bullshit the groggy muck. Only lookout for yourself son, ive been arounnd awhile, [people dont give a fuck about anyone else they care only for themselves, in the end at the most critical time they will always choose them instead of some one else. We are alone in this wrld and its the hard truth jut learn not to ddepend on others while you are still in your youth, ive been fucked over to many times by people i thought i was very close to. now im out to get mines me and only me you and only you, get that fucking look on ur face sorry for beeing real and telling the truth, im trying to prepare your for whats ahead, im tryig to prevent you from depending on a brutus who will fill you with lead, stab you in the back for their own personnal gain, being to trustworthy is a heroic flaw like being egotistical, wanting to help your friends to much, being aragont ect. kryptonite to super man pease dont be batman and let it be yourr bane, bane as in the villian to let you know. im back, here are my words again not my dads, ji really do miss all the relationships i had, havent spoken to my dad in years tookk one for theteam stayed with mama dukese inj the ssplit to save faace, foir my innocent younger brothers. you know what shes also my motheer, shes not capable of surviving alone i didnt think i would abandon her ever i thought id never do that, i stuck with her out of evveryone, a family oof six she looked out for me in times of strife wish i could give her one last kiss, just shot my last 20 and i fucin missed, absesses dont matte any more i bet this 45 shoots true time for the finale, no way i can miss, as the curtains close on my young life one last thought people really took to me, like white on rice, women were drawn to me the mystery i had them enticced, June baby as a cancer i am hard to understand i met a chick once who had a spot in my liifes bnd, she knew me we had a connection so much love we were never disrespectin im glad i could atleast i could teach hersome shit before she ripped my beeating heart out of my chest and stepped on it. Loved hermore than life and i still do i promised her one day i would find her and marry her, walkher down that isle say the words ido, she felt what i felt i know its tru, wasnt ready fgor commitment baby i wil alwayslove yo never orget you if i can i connect with you, like a disease i infected you i aways broght you downi was just baggage extra wait holing you down dragging around im glad youo saw through my snake charming ways saw me for who i was a bumm who couldnt change noot in a short number of days, someone so crippled by pain and grief it was beyond belief, she was the only one i wore my heart on my sleeve for , she lef me sobbinig, crrying violently without end in the door the doorway to more pain. i know she had no choice she had to live her lifee i was just in he way, i was obscuring her focus. eye on the prize isthe only way to achieve your goals and tnt them fuckin boulders, in your way, today i die babe, long time comin bet yall thought i was here to stay. baby l dontshed a tear kno i died drinkin a beer haha but nah you were my last thoughts thinking about all the time we spent getting lost in eachothers eyes and gettin so close we read eachothers thougts, illl miss or idk if ill be concious or just nothjingness, i guess ill fnd out when i finally stop being a pussy and proced with this, see ya velma ill always be your shaggy thinka bout me and dont forget what i made you see, in your self im just another memory on our shelf but let it bbe one thaat sticks we had somethingthat made ssense just clicks somethin that felt so right im really gonn miss, everythinig abnout you im sorry you couldnt trust me but i dont doubt why. i know the truth ive never denied a thing in my life, dont getme wrong everybody tells a little white lie, but you know what its a sign of intelligence not to be afraid to say idk not to lie for the hll of it. Ill see you soon in the nxt life or two i hope reincarnatiuon has a possibility of being true, godbye cruel world th ride is over it was a hell of a whirl, i leave you with absolutely nohing conntributted i was just a part o the cancer people had to live with, butnever acknowledgedd, acted ignoant to ther surroundings as daddy paid for college, i burned bright and hot and had a lot of fun, i had alot of life experienc got alot of shit done, nothing productivee of course in ssocieties eyes but i did fullfill atleast some personal goals, important things in my eyes, the curtains are almost done descending as my pittiful life is ending, but keep your pitty mother fuckers i dont want shit from any of you i dont give yoou nothin dont be so self righteous you look like a bunch of fools, greive for me or celebrate my life i guess its on you how you chhoose to rfemmeber a nobody that nobody knew, a couple feet before the curtains drop, is that? myy eyes decieving? me? no i do see that a single rose descends from the skies, i stare intently at the work of art, a rose is soo beautiful, a representation of love, from the heart, so delicate with its velvet petals, easily ruined a boket wouldve been nice, but who am i fooling, thats a beautiful thing, that was really nice. the product bubbles as i take my last hit of ice, cant takemy eyes off that rose.. its so beautiful... the gun on my forhead now, looking at each individual pedals.. dew from the early mornin forming a small puddle around that naturral phenom, that iconic organic, spectaacular symbol of sometthing real, somethin that matters, something sensual.

As the bits of his brain splatter behid him, arms spread; with grace, almost angelic.he falls off the ciff a hundred feet now for falling, weird but there was a look of peace in his eyes; on his face, maybe he wll finally find happiness.. he fell with nobility and so much grace the floor he hit, his finall restingplace, what cuold be a better box then a natural setting, a beaauty of nature, crawling all around and he will return to the earth, the mother wll take him back just as she gave birth, i thinnk this shit is over now its not my story to tell, inside voices kids no reason to yell. shhhhhhhhhhh.

dont depend dont believe the [enter here]

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