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mattodore · 10 months

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100 questions with Theo | playlist, pinterest | ←

1. What common traits do you share with your oc? What about them is the least like you?

Well… we both have a hard time connecting with people, are easily jealous, and are hungry for understanding. Theo is very different from me in that he’s reckless, judgmental, dismissive, and is more willing to work for approval than I am.

2. Do you think you would get along with your oc if you could meet them? What things would you talk about?

To be honest… no. Theo isn’t exactly easy to get along with (which is by design) and neither one of us would make the first move to talk to the other.

3. How competent would your oc be in a survival situation? Would they be better off on their own or in a group?

He’d be very competent. Theo is a survivor. He’ll claw his way to the finish line even while covered in gore and viscera. Most of his knowledge comes from what he’s read with little hands-on experience, but I believe he’d still be able to apply that knowledge well. He’s not very strong as he doesn’t exercise and is fairly slim… so I think he might struggle with things that would require a lot of muscle. But, then again, Theo has a sharp mind… I think he could find a workaround for most things that would’ve required physical strength anyway. Theo’s fast on his feet and is also good at hiding… he’s pretty stealthy and quiet when he needs to be. Plus, with Theo’s perceptiveness and natural aptitude for reading people, I think he’d be quick to suss out who’s trustworthy or not and would know not to approach a bad situation.

Theo is a loner and is generally distrustful of people, so he’d be better off on his own. Maybe one other person beside him would be okay for a short while just to have an ally, but… I don’t know. I think he’d let someone tag along with him for a few days and then he’d just vanish in the middle of the night to be all on his own again.

4. Is your oc a daredevil, or more of a scaredy cat? What is the most daring thing they’ve done in their life?

He’s self-destructive, so… daredevil. At the same time, though, I think a lot of the situations Theo puts himself in do in fact scare him… you’d hardly be able to tell, though. The most daring thing he’s done… hm… Theo has walked into the den of a drug lord and behaved disrespectfully.

5. What is your oc’s patience like? When waiting for something, are they able to sit still or do they fidget? How do they fidget?

I think Theo is exceptionally patient and doesn’t fidget at all. He was trained out of unattractive behaviors very young in his life, so he doesn’t fuss or even so much as shift from foot to foot—not even while under duress. He’s very still. As for his patience… Theo is well acquainted with never getting what he wants no matter how long he waits, so he has the patience of a saint.

6. How much thought does your oc put into what they wear/look like? Any reason why?

Theo has to think about what he’s wearing very carefully. He’s essentially living three separate lives and has different attire for each of them. He has the typical refined masculine fashion he has to wear whenever he’s around his family, the casual fashion he dresses in for his college life, and then the more fun, colorful, androgynous fashion that he wears for his nightlife activities. He’s separated his life into three neat little boxes while he himself stands at a distance from them, wiping his hands on his legs nervously.

With regards to skin and hair care, he doesn’t do much. Theo has naturally good skin (even when he was a teenager) and only uses facial cleanser and lotions on it. His hair is the same and all he does to it, aside from washing it, is use different oils to keep it soft. He doesn’t allot much time to these things as he has other things he believes he needs to focus on (academics, for one).

7. Does your oc collect anything? What about knowledge or facts? How big is their collection?

Theo collects these small, intricately crafted decorative bells! He loves the sounds they make and how pretty they are. He has an entire curio cabinet full of them and is methodical in dusting them off and wiping them down regularly. He also has a ton of other knick knacks and things he’s picked up over the years scattered all around his apartment, but the bells are what he’s most attached to, I believe.

8. What kind of flavors does your oc like? How much spice can they handle?

Theo has been eating spicy food since he was a child, so he takes it like a champ. I don’t think he’s ever had anything that was too spicy for him. The burn is nothing to him. Moving on, Theo isn’t picky and will eat whatever is given to him, no matter the flavor. He does actually dislike sweets, though, and has a hard time eating them when they’re given to him. To be clear, he’ll still eat them… he just doesn’t actually like them and grimaces the whole way through. Theo has a really strange relationship with food.

9. How easily does your oc trust others? Any particular reason why? How trustworthy are they themselves?

Theo had his trust broken by the abuse and neglect he faced when he was just a little boy. He’s never felt safe around others as a result and the effects of that have definitely leaked over onto everything else in his life, staining any chance he could’ve had at forming normal bonds with others. It’s not even that he doesn’t trust people easily, but rather that he distrusts everyone on principle and is suspicious of every kindness or placid smile he receives. Even when he’s being pampered, he feels uneasy and suspicious of what will come next—what he thinks has to come next. He believes that there’s something malignant and twisted at the core of everyone who tries to touch him. If he can’t find the intent to harm that he always expects to see, he’ll just sow the seed himself.

As for Theo, I believe he’s trustworthy to a point. You can trust that Theo won’t tell other people the things you’ve told him in confidence, but you can’t exactly trust him not to turn around and start hurling the things you’ve told him right back in your face. Theo lashes out when he gets nervous or scared, especially if he’s in withdrawal, and he has this ability to see through people… to know what will slice them apart easiest, what they dislike most about themselves… that is almost impossible to come back from. You have to be incredibly strong, mentally speaking, to be able to handle Theo sometimes. He’ll tremble while hurting you, but he’ll hurt you nonetheless.

10. What are some of your oc’s pet peeves? How do they handle it when the annoyance doesn’t stop?

Theo actually has a lot of pet peeves… so much so that I don’t think it’d be a wise use of my time to list them all, lest we be here for days. I’ll just list off some of the things that annoy him the most out of everything.

Theo really doesn’t like being prodded for answers to personal questions, especially if they relate to his childhood or family life. He doesn’t like it when he’s interrupted or talked down to. He doesn’t like being touched unexpectedly or having someone stand too close to him and will flinch reactively. He doesn’t like having the spotlight on him—or, at least, he doesn’t like it when he’s not all uninhibited from intoxication. He especially doesn’t like arrogance (lmao).

How Theo reacts is totally dependent on who he’s around, whether or not he’s using, and whichever one of these pet peeves is getting to him, but in general he’s either going to shut down, glare and shoot off at the mouth, or walk away.

11. Does your oc have a good sense of direction? Do they get lost easily?

Theo’s sense of direction is okay, but it definitely could be better. His memory itself isn’t very great and he often finds himself feeling déjà vu in places he swears he’s never been to while forgetting the basic landmarks that’re around the city he lives in.

12. How well would your oc handle being placed in a leadership position?

Not well at all. Theo doesn’t want to be responsible for other people when he can hardly even take care of himself. The idea of being some kind of authority is nausea inducing to him. I think a lot of people would willingly follow him, though, because he really does have this innate ability to draw people in even when he’s not trying to.

13. What is your oc’s confidence like? Are they self-confident to the point of being arrogant? Are they terribly self-deprecating?

Theo often seems to other people as though he has a lot of self-confidence because of the way he talks and how he carries himself, but in actuality he’s rather disparaging toward himself. He’s always second guessing himself and wondering if he’s good enough. He feels as though he’s missing some vital part of himself that everyone else must have, something that without which he’s never going to be fully whole and deserving of love.

14. What is your oc’s speech like? How loud are they usually? Do they have an accent or a stutter?

Theo has a very clear voice and never slurs. However, he does start mumbling if he’s beginning to withdraw into himself or if he’s only just woken up and sleep is still clinging to him. He speaks quietly, never wanting to be too loud and draw too much attention to himself (a habit he formed in his childhood). His American English accent is largely neutral without any extra stresses or dips.

He did actually develop a stutter in his teenage years but underwent speech therapy for it.

15. What is your oc’s memory like? Do they remember certain things better than others? Do they have any strategies to better remember things?

Theo often has lapses in his memory that’re either brought upon by or made worse by drug use and trauma. There are events and experiences that his brain just buries from him and he can’t remember them at all. Aside from that, his memory itself isn’t that great, but he’s learned that repetition helps. If he’s studying or has something he really wants to remember well, he’ll read/repeat it forwards and then backwards a few times. He takes a ton of notes as well and has a journal that he writes in every day now. He’s aware that his memory gets better when he lays off the drug use for a while, but… he’s addicted. He doesn’t try getting clean for a while and relapses many times before it finally sticks.

16. How affectionate is your oc? How do they convey their affection? By being touchy, or through more subtle ways?

Whether it’s platonic or romantic, Theo isn’t very affectionate at all. He doesn’t even really have a baseline for what real physical and verbal affection is meant to look like anymore, as his memories of the affection his childhood au pair showed him keep fading more and more as each day passes.

Theo can only picture affection if it’s hard—if it’s brutal and rough and will ultimately hurt him. He can’t really wrap his head around softness anymore. That kind of touch is almost unbearable to him… because if he could’ve always had gentle hands on him, then what did he do so wrong to deserve the ones he got?

He wants to be affectionate, but… it’s too much. He’s too fearful and ashamed of everything he wants and it’s all just building up inside of him. Voicing desire out loud is nearly impossible for him as well, because he just feels so much shame around it… how it deviates from everything he’s been told he should want… how it’s been used against him…

It takes a lot of time to get him used to gentle affection and when he starts to reciprocate it, it’s tentative at first. He’ll stand close by and then he’ll reach out to hold onto an arm or grip tight onto the back of a shirt for just a few seconds. Just… little progress at a time, these small victories where warmth spreads through his fingers. It takes well over a year before he becomes more bold and will initiate kisses or hugs. Still, though, he won’t voice his affections or even his desires. Not for a very long time.

The only exception to this is when he’s hurt. He seeks Matthias out and will wait to be touched before clinging on tightly and letting it all out.

17. How polite is your oc? Do they know how to act in a formal situation? How would they *actually* act in a formal situation?

Theo isn’t very polite unless he’s in the presence of his parents or is somewhere where he’s expected to uphold his family name. He knows how to act in formal situations well enough and will follow the rules set out for those occasions when he needs to. Outside of formal situations and away from his parents, though, Theo is often dismissive and cold and will skim over the standards of politeness. It’s the only way he knows how to defend himself anymore.

18. How physically strong is your oc? Is their agility or endurance better?

Theo isn’t very strong at all. He has some lean muscle that’s a combination of natural testosterone paired with light cardio (he dances, plays a few sports when he gets the opportunity to, and sometimes jogs) but that’s it. I think his stamina isn’t that great but he’s fast and reacts quickly—though he finds it hard to actually dodge when he should… even when he can see it coming. His tolerance for pain has adapted over time and is rather high now, but the emotional effects of being hurt still get to him.

19. What is your oc’s creative skillset? Music, drawing, writing, dancing, etc.? Or are they lacking creativity entirely?

I think Theo is actually really creative even without him realizing it. He really enjoys dancing and is free while moving, doing whatever he thinks feels good; he wasn’t taught professionally at all, so it’s just intuitive and fun for him. He keeps track of things in his journal, but he has a certain style to the way he writes that I think is incredibly descriptive and lends itself to creativity. In all of his English and Literature classes he received a ton of high praise that was ultimately ignored as it wasn’t relevant to the direction his life was planned to go in (with relation to his future major in business). He doesn’t draw or play music, but I think he’d be good at it if he ever allowed himself the time to have those creative outlets. Theo’s pretty strict with himself, honestly, but his imagination… it’s definitely there. I think as a child he was used to entertaining himself by imagining a different life for himself, one where his au pair took him with them when they left his home.

20. Does your oc have any favorite games to pass the time? What other hobbies do they have?

Theo people watches, if that counts. He likes observing people and picking out details about their life from their behaviors and the way they dress. His other hobbies… hm. I don’t think he has very many, truthfully. He likes to go partying and will get intoxicated however he can and go dancing, maybe even play a few drinking games. He likes playing sports but he doesn’t often get the opportunity to since he doesn’t have any friends (in his mind). He likes to collect things and window shop. He likes journaling. Yeah… that’s really all I can think of. Theo doesn’t allow himself very many simple joys.

21. Is your oc expressive, or would they rather conceal their emotions? What are their typical expressions like?

Theo can certainly try very hard to conceal his emotions, but his eyes… they give everything away if you’re truly paying attention. He can be very impassive at times, especially if he’s hurt, but when he’s frustrated it’s incredibly obvious; his brow furrows and he glares directly at whatever or whomever is bothering him. He hides his hurt well, but when he’s feverish and sick you can kind of catch onto it by the sweat on his brow and the flush of his cheeks. Theo’s smile itself is incredibly rare and kind of… clumsy? His smile is crooked and he never holds it for very long. If you call out his name he’ll startle and quickly look toward you, and in those few seconds of shock his face gives away how terrified he truly is most of the time.

22. How easily does your oc fare in the sun? Do they tan or burn easily? Are they completely unaffected?

Theo doesn’t burn at all even when he doesn’t apply any sunscreen. Let it be known that Matthias is always reaching out to Theo to put some on him when they’re together, fussing over Theo and complaining about the harms of the sun… it’s cute. Theo doesn’t tan that easily so he has to put suntan lotion on whenever he wants to.

23. How graceful is your oc? Are they elegant in their movements, or more clumsy?

Theo has a grace that comes to him easily now through years of practice. Because of how ambitious both of his parents were for wealth and status, he’d been brought to numerous social functions that required a lot of him when it came to manners and poise. He never learned in a professional capacity, but he has a kind of elegance that was ingrained in him by a militaristic approach to teaching from his parents as well as observation. There’s nothing clumsy about the way he moves when in public and you would assume he’s someone who’s very confident in himself just by watching him from across the room.

24. Is your oc a romantic, or are they grossed out by the simple mention of anything romantic?

Hm. I don’t think Theo outwardly shows any romantic tendencies, but inwardly… in that soft, guarded place inside of him… I think he makes himself sick yearning for love and romance. He doesn’t let on to those feelings of his at all. In fact, I think Theo probably shrinks away from mentions of romance, insisting he doesn’t need it… but really, it’s something he imagines all the time. What must it be like, to have that for yourself? Does it hurt? How bad is it? Is it painless? Does it fill you up? Does it ever feel like enough? Thoughts like those.

25. How stubborn is your oc? Are they open to considering different options or opinions, or are they more closed off?

Theo is incredibly stubborn. You can certainly try to convince him to change his opinion or what he believes, but you’re going to be fighting tooth and nail against a man who is wholly inflexible. Theo’s formed a lot of very fast and hard opinions over the course of his life that he’s unreceptive to changing for his own peace of mind. He might let some allowances slip by, but don’t count on it. I honestly don’t think he’d ever give in and change them unless he’s been hit with solid facts or experiences something for himself that points to the contrary.

26. How does your oc sleep? Do they move around a lot? What position does your oc normally sleep in? What are their typical bedding arrangements like?

Theo is a very anxious, fitful sleeper. He’s wound up all tight through the night and will fist his hands in his covers or his pillows. He moves around a lot and prefers to sleep with his back to a wall and the door a great distance away from him. He can’t sleep if he’s on the first floor of a building or if he doesn’t check all of the locks first. Theo sleeps on his side and will actually startle awake if he rolls over onto his stomach, heart in his throat and sweat at his temples. Theo’s bed in his apartment has… three, maybe four pillows—one of which he hugs to his chest. On his bed, he has two sets of sheets, a comforter, and a blanket. Theo has a sort of crowded bed, honestly, but it cradles him… which is something he needs to feel safe.

27. What is your oc’s sleep schedule like? Are they a night owl, an early morning riser, or do they get any sleep at all?

Theo prefers the morning as he doesn’t like the dark and feels worse without sunlight. But… hm… Theo doesn’t get a lot of sleep since he’s either out partying and getting too intoxicated to stand or he’s up all night pouring over his study notes and getting a headache for it. I’d say he normally falls asleep around 3AM-4AM and doesn’t wake back up until 7AM. Four-ish hours is pretty average for how much sleep he gets a night… maybe less at times. He’s wearing himself down and will end up crashing eventually…

28. How organized is your oc? How important is organization to your oc?

Theo is very organized when it comes to his study materials and his wardrobe, but the state of the rest of his apartment is… I wouldn’t say messy exactly, but cluttered enough that he has trouble finding things sometimes. He has so much on his plate already that his apartment kind of suffers for it. I think he values organization a lot, it’s just that he lets it get away from him. I think there’s a lot you can learn about Theo from how his apartment looks…

29. If a perfume was to be made to represent your oc, what sorts of smells would be included in it?

I think Theo is best represented by light scents as he himself doesn’t really like anything that smells too chemical. He hardly ever wears cologne, but when he does he sticks to a fresh green scent. Powder and soap… that’s what reminds me of him most. Lemon, too, but not strong… just a hint of citrus.

30. How caring/empathetic is your oc? Are they the type to immediately adopt and protect others, or are they a true sadist?

Kindness hasn’t come easily to Theo since he was a child, so I’m not sure if he’s very caring anymore… at least, if he is then he doesn’t outwardly show it. Theo does have a learned kind of empathy, though… just not… a very real kind? Um, so because of the hostile environment he grew up in he had to adapt to subtle changes in expression, mood, and tone… he needed to know when he was in danger, what alert signs there were. The easier people became to read, the more he could feel their emotions spill over and try to pull him in. It’s… not exactly as if he’s sharing the feelings, but more like he has a very real sense of them… it’s almost tangible.

31. What inspired the creation of your oc? Any specific things, a general aesthetic or idea, or something completely random?

Theo is a pretty old character of mine… I’d say he’s been with me for at least five years now. Originally, I think he was just… a vague idea in my head with some aesthetic choices in mind (sweaters, abandoned houses, autumn leaves, dirty shoes)... but over time I started getting more invested. I think one of the main building blocks of his character was actually a really old post I saw about a bloody child bringing a rabbit they'd saved from a hawk into the house and trying to get their mom to notice, but the mom just blew them off because she was busy on the phone… yeah. I kind of got that stuck in my head and built up this neglected kid around it who was a little sarcastic, mean, buried under all kinds of responsibilities, and lonely. His actual appearance in TS4 wasn't even really meant to be him at first, as I'd just been making random male sims at the time and then one of the ones I made kept drawing my attention back to them. I made some slight changes and then I decided that would be Theo. He still looks pretty similar to the original sim, actually.

32. How judgemental is your oc? Do they keep an open mind about people, or are they the type to judge a book by its cover?

Oh, Theo is super judgmental. He’s distrustful of people on principle and highly perceptive, which is an all around bad combination since he can quickly spin the innocuous into something worse.

33. What five objects or things could be expected to be found on your oc’s person at any time? Why?

Theo has a bag that he keeps his planner, his phone, his keys, some cash, and hand sanitizer in… occasionally there’s some baggies in there if he’s stressed out from too many assignments or pressure from his parents.

34. Does your oc have a pet? If they could have another one or if they were to get one, what would it be? How well could they care for it?

No, Theo has no pets. He wouldn’t even know what kind of pet to get. Theo had never even been around any pets until he met Matthias’s cat. I also think… well. Theo wouldn’t be very good at caring for a pet. Like, I don’t even think he’d be good at feeding fish regularly. He doesn’t have that kind of time and can barely even take care of himself.

35. Does your oc have any distinguishing markings? Scars, tattoos, birthmarks, freckles, etc?

Theo is covered in beauty marks from head to toe. I think his most notable (at least to me) beauty marks are the two under his left eye and the one on the tip of his nose. Theo has no birthmarks, freckles, or tattoos. Theo also has no scars… every violent hand laid on him has been intentional in pulling back just before leaving behind any lasting marks.

36. What is your oc’s fight or flight response like? What sorts of things provoke it the most?

When Theo’s nervous (around other people, in discussions that’re too personal, when confronted by emotions, etc.) I’d say he falsely exhibits the fight response and will become a bit nasty as a defensive maneuver. If he’s pushed past defensive behaviors and is actually put into harm's way, the fight response quickly melts away to his real fear responses. As a specific result of trauma, Theo displays both the fawn and freeze responses. His parents bring about the fawn response and figures of authority bring out the freeze response. I’ll leave it at that.

37. How does your oc handle heavy stress? Do they have any specific coping mechanisms? Are they healthy or not?

Theo is used to stress as he’s been put under a lot of it since he was a teenager. That said, he’s never been able to manage it healthily and his go-to way to cope is by numbing everything out. Theo abuses substances and sex… and I suppose that by nature of both of these coping mechanisms he’s also abusing himself. It’s obviously not good for him and as time goes on he begins to spin out of control.

38. What does your oc do to relax? Any specific activities? Why?

Theo never truly allows himself to relax, like, ever. Hm. I do think there are small moments, though, where he finds some peace. When he’s in his apartment he’ll sometimes reach into the curio cabinet that holds his collection of tiny little bells and give a few of them a ring… the sounds they give off are very sweet and make him smile. In the morning, when he wakes up at his apartment, he likes to watch the birds fluttering about outside his bedroom window; there’s a window box just there that’s home to a nest. He’s never once tried to interact with the birds, though. He just stares and watches silently from his bed.

39. Does your oc have any nicknames? What are the origins of them? If they don’t, can you come up with some possible ones?

Theo is in itself a nickname that he gave himself when he moved out of his parents’ home (Theodore is his full name). Most everyone in his personal life calls him Theo except for his parents, his extended family, and the people that his parents associate with.

Matthias has given Theo a couple personal nicknames and also calls him a bunch of others. My personal favorite of the nicknames Matthias has given Theo is Bambi, which was originally given to him because his last name is Doe (a doe is a kind of deer… hence Matthias reaching for the name of an animated deer). Matthias also calls him Bambi because of his golden brown eyes and because Theo is sort of wobbly and green in Matthias’s eyes, reminding him of that scene wherein Bambi tries to walk for the first time. Matthias also calls Theo mała myszko, which means little mouse in Polish (Matthias’s native language), and he often uses my darling at the same time (like: “My darling, mała myszko, it’s time to get up”). As for regular nicknames, Angel is what Matthias calls Theo most often in the heat of sex (again, a nickname often said alongside my darling, as in: “My darling angel”). There are many more pet names that Matthias calls Theo, but those are the ones he hears most often.

40. What languages does your oc know? Are there any they want to learn but haven’t had the chance to? How good are they at picking up new ones?

Theo is only fluent in English and Spanish, however he can read Hangul and understand Korean when it’s spoken to or around him. He doesn’t have the time to learn any other languages and doesn’t exactly have a desire to either. I think his parents have definitely pushed him to learn more languages as they would benefit his career, but he has too much going on as it is to learn at the moment.

41. What was the worst injury your oc ever suffered? Has it had any long lasting impact on them?

I’m not going to answer that first part, but I will say that it did impact him grievously and has rippled out through his whole life.

42. Is your oc an optimist or a pessimist? Any particular reason why?

Theo’s a pessimist. He’s never had much to be happy about and is on a path in his life that is being entirely puppeteered by his parents. Theo has nothing to look forward to and feels like his life is out of his own control and already over.

Through the course of the little story that I have for Echthroi in my head, however, Theo does eventually move away from the pessimism. I don’t think he becomes an optimist exactly, but he smiles more and finds things to look forward to in his life.

43. How important are the rules to your oc? Do they follow them to a t, or do they enjoy breaking them?

Theo definitely has a history as a rule follower. He can’t really help it, not with the way he was raised. He had rebellious moments as a teenager—refusing to sit down for a haircut, stabbing a needle through his own ears to pierce them—but those were things he did to incite his parents’ attention. Now, though… well. I think he still follows most rules, but he does use drugs… pretty big rule to break there, legally speaking.

44. How violent is your oc? Or are they more of a pacifist? To what lengths will they go to start/avoid a conflict?

Theo is all bark and no bite. He’ll lash out if he’s frightened, he’ll insult and dismiss, but the second he sees a telling twitch of the hand or building tension in the jaw he goes quiet and retreats. He’s only ever tried fighting back a few times… he doesn’t have it in him anymore.

45. How is your oc around animals? What about children?

Theo isn’t good with children and is awkward and fumbling with animals. He’s never been around a lot of kids, but… I don’t know. I think seeing children hurts him, a lot of the time. The happier they are, the more Theo wants to escape. With animals… he doesn’t know how to touch them or even how to approach. Matthias’s cat, Odious, is very friendly and makes Theo freeze up when she comes over to lay in his lap. It takes him months to get used to her. He doesn’t hate either of them to be clear. Like, he’s not a total weirdo, he just… he doesn’t know how to act around them.

46. Does your oc lie a lot, or is the truth very important to them? What is their reaction to other people lying to them?

Theo isn’t a very good liar but he has a lot that he has to keep secret… because of this, he’s learned how to skirt around the truth and evades questions that poke and prod with ease. However, I think despite how frequently he tells half-truths, he’s actually someone who doesn’t like lying. He’s used to being told lies, though. He’s been lied to rather often and even though he can see through it effortlessly now that he’s had so many years to catch on to the signs, it still hurts him. He doesn’t outwardly show that he knows the truth, but internally it tears him up.

47. How much of a prankster is your oc? Are their pranks truly evil, or more harmless, positive ones?

Theo doesn’t like pranks. He doesn’t like startling people and doesn’t find it humorous. He doesn’t ever want to make anyone feel fear. He knows what that’s like all too well.

48. What are your oc’s nervous tics? Are they aware of them? Do they attempt to hide them?

I was going to say Theo has no nervous tics, but I suppose the way he lashes out is a kind of nervous tic. Physically speaking, though, Theo shows next to no signs of distress. He isn’t someone who fidgets ever, though he does still get the urge to at times. If he ever slips up and moves a hand clumsily in the air or shifts uncomfortably, he’ll catch himself and freeze, righting himself without drawing any more attention to himself.

Theo is still skittish, though. Like, he won’t shift around or bounce a leg, but he startles easily. Call his name and he jumps, make a loud noise and he jumps, say something unexpectedly and he jumps. He’s never been able to hide that.

49. What would be the perfect gift for your oc? What would be their reaction to receiving it?

If you gave Theo a bell his cheeks would get all pink and he wouldn’t be able to look away from it… he’d hold it very gently in his hands, not wanting to drop it. He’d say thank you all soft and quiet, then place it with the rest of his collection. He’d smile to himself, but he wouldn’t smile at you.

I also think bandaging Theo up would feel like a gift to him. No one’s ever taken care of him like that before.

50. How attentive is your oc? How perceptive are they? How easily do they get distracted?

Theo’s incredibly perceptive and when he’s focused on one thing it’s almost impossible to pull his attention away from it. He’s pretty discipled, honestly, because of all the studying and the focus he’s needed to keep up with it. I think Matthias is the only person who can distract Theo… the ways in which he goes about doing that are best left to the imagination. Have fun.

51. If your oc was to receive an award for something, what would it most likely be for? Have they received any awards in the past?

Theo’s won many different kinds of academic awards throughout school. Honestly… I don’t know any specific awards I’d give him…

52. In what ways does your oc cope with anger? How easily angered are they? Do they lash out?

Theo only lashes out when he’s scared, not from anger. Anger is an emotion that frightens Theo, that colors his cheeks with shame. He’s been on the receiving end of anger most of his life, so to feel it himself is… horrifying. I think Theo believes anger forces your hand, that it’s always this uncontrollable act of violence no matter what. He represses his anger frantically, desperate not to frighten anyone, not to hurt. He’s very hard to make angry and there’s next to nothing someone could do to make him act on his anger, even if it would be justified. He gets annoyed, he huffs, he rolls his eyes, he insults, but he never raises his voice, he never throws his fist, he never threatens.

53. If your oc was to host a podcast or TV show, what would it be about? Would your oc actually be good at it? What sorts of guests would appear?

Theo would rather watch paint dry than host any kind of show, let’s be clear. However, I think he has a very good podcast voice. I can imagine him doing a podcast where he reads to you until you fall asleep. No guests, just his voice.

54. How would you describe your oc’s voice to sound like? Do you have any voice claims for them?

Theo is soft-spoken. His voice is unassuming and haunting… you close your eyes to listen and feel the chills running up your arms. He pronounces his words almost delicately, giving an alluring color to his voice. Like a mirage in the desert, you want to drink it in, to hold it in your own mouth just to taste it for a while. When Theo speaks, you get the impression that he’s not all there, something disengaged in his tone. It drives people to take a step closer, wanting to hear more of it, to be worthy of his full attention. It’s a voice you could listen to every day and still find yourself drawing a blank when trying to imagine the avatar behind it.

No voice claims.

55. How sensitive to loud sound is your oc? Do they prefer constant high background noise, low background noise, or complete silence?

Theo is very jumpy around loud noises. If he isn’t prepared for it (like knowingly heading into a club where the music is going to be booming) he’ll flinch and turn his eyes to the ground quickly, shaking out his hands before going statue-still again. Theo prefers complete silence or quiet background noises like a fan or soft, melodious music.

56. What is your oc’s favorite color? If you had to choose one color to represent your oc, what would it be and why?

Theo’s favorite color is probably some shade of red. And I think a fiery orange represents Theo well. Theo reminds me a lot of fire… he’s someone who keeps standing still while smoke is pouring out of his ears, burning quietly in the middle of an abandoned room.

57. How good is your oc’s sight? Do they wear glasses? Do they need glasses? Do they have some form of night vision?

Theo has perfect eyesight.

58. How would you describe your oc’s appearance to someone who’s looking for them? What features would be most identifiable?

I’d probably start waxing poetic about him, honestly. I’d just be giving way too much detail… like:

Theo’s features are delicate and soft-edged. He’s slender with narrow shoulders and of average height. His skin is light brown with a dark smattering of moles all over. His face is round and ruddy cheeked. His brows are straight and dark. His eyes are a light golden brown, sometimes mistaken for hazel, with puffy bags underneath that give a youthful yet tired appearance. His nose is button shaped with a straight bridge. His lips are plump and full. His hair is dark brown and tumbles down to his collarbone in thick waves. His gaze is cool, assessing. He carries such an air of hurt around him that your heart aches when you see him. You could fall in love with him easily.

I think whoever I’m giving instructions to would forget half of what I’d said and only remember the part where I mentioned his long hair. And… hm… I’d say his ruddy cheeks are his most identifiable feature for sure.

59. How good at cooking is your oc? What can they cook/what is their favorite thing to cook?

I think Theo is very bad at taking care of himself, so he actually forgets to eat frequently now that he’s living on his own for college. Regardless… I think he’s decent at cooking. Despite his family having enough money that they easily could’ve hired help around their home, they didn’t. This means that Theo had to fend for himself at a pretty young age. He knows how to cook pretty basic food, but the way he cooks is… messy. He doesn’t have a favorite thing to cook.

60. How good is your oc at keeping track of time? Are they always late, always early, or always right on time?

Hm… I think Theo actually loses track of time a lot, courtesy of his drug use and memory problems, so he has a handful of recurring alarms set on his phone. He’s always on time because of that. He’d feel sick if he were ever late to something he was required to be at, actually… especially if it was a family event.

61. Is your oc more quick-thinking, or do they take longer to figure things out?

Theo catches on quickly. He’s incredibly perceptive and sees what others cannot with ease. Early on in Theo’s childhood he had to learn how to pick up on subtleties in expressions, on double meanings to words, on tone, on gestures… he had to pick everything apart to protect himself, and as he grew that skill of his did as well and aided him in seeing patterns. He’s able to find answers faster than most other people just from deduction.

62. How quick is your oc? Do they have faster or slower reflexes? What things are they quickest at?

Perhaps it’s due to his good eyesight or his peerless perception, but Theo’s reflexes are incredibly fast. He’s good at running, too, and is lightning quick on his feet. I think he’d have done amazingly in track and field if he ever went for it in school. He's really good at soccer for this reason. Despite his stamina being pretty average, Theo’s the kind of person who will push himself harder and harder even when his body’s telling him to pull back. If he dedicated real time to it, I think he could train for a couple of years and come back playing better than anyone.

63. How self-disciplined is your oc? Do they often think before they act, or the other way around?

Theo always thinks things over first and isn’t one for snap decisions. In fact, I’d say Theo actually makes himself sick from how much thinking he’s always doing. One of the many reasons Theo uses drugs is because of how effective they are at shutting off his brain. He’s inundated by the responsibilities of his life—of which he feels he has no control over—and loses whenever he tries outrunning the thoughts that swirl around in his head. Drugs are the easiest way he’s found to get it all to just… stop.

Theo is also very serious about his education, and, in that way, he’s admirably self-disciplined.

64. Which of the seven deadly sins does your oc fall under most? What about the seven heavenly virtues?

Hm… picking a sin for Theo is surprisingly hard. I think Theo’s strongest sin is… maybe envy? Definitely not gluttony or greed, though, that’s for sure.

As for the heavenly virtues, I think Theo best exemplifies fortitude, followed by prudence and temperance.

65. If you were to give your oc a new superpower, what would you choose and why? If *they* were to be able to choose, what would it be and why?

I think I’d want to give Theo something he could use to protect himself and that would offer him a sense of comfort. Maybe just give him invulnerability outright or something subtler that would make it easy for him to escape situations he doesn’t want to be in. Flight? Invisibility?

As for Theo, I think he’d want something repellant. A forcefield of some kind…?

66. What sort of advice would people go to your oc for? What sort of advice is your oc actually good at giving?

Theo isn’t good at giving advice and would shake his head at being asked.

67. How many people does your oc prefer to be around? A crowd, a few friends, or all on their own?

Theo is interesting in that he’s a loner but he also goes out of his way to enter clubs and join throngs of people in the ebb and flow of dance, blending in with them in the dark. I think Theo is actually lonely at his core and ultimately is unhappy being so solitary—a truth he neither acknowledges to himself nor to others. A small group of people who he trusts and loves would soothe him best.

68. What sorts of things would cheer your oc up when they’re down? Is your oc sad often, or is it more rare?

Calling Theo sad would be an understatement. Theo’s full of woe and has little in his life that brings him joy. I think he’s very used to the way he feels but… I do think simple things would make him smile. Something as easy as saying that he’s been missed would do the trick. Just… the implication that he’s been thought of and isn’t easily forgotten… yeah.

69. How energetic is your oc? Are they constantly tired, or constantly bouncing off the walls?

Theo has the weight of the world on his shoulders and is operating on just a few hours of sleep most days, so he’s pretty much low energy up until the moment he’s free of his responsibilities and can let loose. You can see him start to come alive when he’s partying, even while sober—his cheeks flush, his eyes light up, and his body moves fluidly. It’s only when he’s on uppers that he actually starts bouncing off the walls.

70. What about your oc’s lifestyle would they change if they had the ability? Why?

I don’t think Theo would even know where to begin…

71. What is your oc’s go-to for offense? What weapon, what style of fighting? Or are words more their weapon of choice?

I don’t actually think Theo has any offensive preferences, because he’s not really a fighter. That human instinct to fight back was trained out of him very young… so. Yeah. He does have a scathing way of speaking that can definitely be used to hurt, though.

72. What is your oc’s ideal environment like? Urban or natural? Fancy or rustic? What’s the weather like?

Theo wants to be away from it all. He wants to be unreachable. The further away he is from other people, the better. So… somewhere where there’s more nature than there are buildings. As for the weather… hm… Theo prefers cool weather as he likes bundling up, but he doesn’t want to be stuck in the snow all the time. A nice, mild climate.

73. If your oc were to be arrested, what would it most likely be for? Is it justified? Have they actually been arrested before?

Well… I think I’m going to have to say the drug use is probably what’d do him in. Is it justified…? Well, he does use drugs… but I personally don’t think drugs should be criminalized and instead believe in harm reduction.

74. How would your oc act when drunk? What about when really, really tired?

Theo actually doesn’t get drunk very often as he doesn’t really like the taste of alcohol and would rather just use drugs. When he does drink enough to get intoxicated, I think the effect is pretty similar to how he is when he’s on milder drugs. Drunk Theo is unrestrained in how he moves, letting himself be as unrefined as he couldn’t be as a child. He waves his hands around and bounces his legs to let out some energy. He throws his head back when he’s feeling good without fear of being told to mind his manners. His inhibitions are all but nonexistent and he speaks whatever thoughts come to mind. All of those walls he’s built up around himself come tumbling down and he forgets why he was ever afraid to exist as he is in the first place.

Theo becomes sluggish and irritable (...more irritable than he normally is, anyway) when he’s stayed up for far too long. He has little time for anyone else and is focused solely on whatever it is that’s been keeping him up. He gets dizzy when he’s lacking sleep and has a hard time staying on task, though. He doesn’t normally let himself get this tired, but it does happen. He has a lot of trouble getting himself to fall asleep after he reaches this point. Whenever Matthias sees Theo like this, he’ll walk Theo to the bath even as Theo huffs and complains testily. He’ll wait for the tub to fill up while he brushes out Theo’s hair and kisses down his neck, speaking softly to Theo all the while. He’ll get Theo in the water and either slide in behind him or sit just outside the bath. He’ll wash Theo’s hair and gently scrub his body, unbothered when Theo’s head falls back onto his shoulder or against his chest, soaking through his shirt. Theo normally becomes fully pliant by the time Matthias is pulling him out of the water, staying quiet as Matthias dries him off, dresses him, and lays him down in the bed. Matthias will only be away for a moment to grab a book before coming back to hold Theo, blocking the door from Theo’s sight. Theo sleeps like a baby after all of that and Matthias lays awake holding him until noon.

75. What would your oc’s dream home be like? How big would it be? What sorts of rooms would be in it? Where would it be located?

Truthfully, Theo doesn’t like big open spaces. I think there’s a loneliness to big houses that unsettles him. He could never feel comfortable somewhere with too many doors, either… too many shadowy corners, not enough assurance that someone couldn’t be hiding in them. So Theo would rather live somewhere smaller, with just the right amount of space for him and all of his things. Honestly, his apartment is pretty perfect for him already.

76. What is/was your oc’s relationship with their family like? Was it happy, tense, or abusive? What living family does your oc currently have, if any?

Theo’s relationship with his parents has always been one of control. Theo doesn’t speak unless spoken to and falls in line at their every word. His father has plans for Theo to join him in his business and his mother begrudgingly allows it, though she would have rather had him following in her footsteps. Theo’s parents see him as a tool… of which they’ve had to beat into proper shape. Theo grew up under the tender care of his childhood au pair while his parents focused on their careers and their status, and it was only when Theo became old enough that he could take care of himself that they sent away his au pair and decided it was their turn to step in. He’d experienced abuse at the hands of his parents before, but his au pair had shielded him from much more than he was ever even aware of. When his parents would leave him to his own devices he found solace in isolation. His mid-teens were when things got worse for him, but his parents weren’t as physical with him past that as he’d learned to behave how they wanted. Now as an adult he’s no longer under their roof but still comes when they call on him. He’s desperate for their affection and approval, of which he never sees.

77. Does your oc like to wear any particular accessories? Hats, jewelry, scarves, etc.?

Theo likes to wear jewelry. He always has a pair of earrings on and will occasionally throw on a necklace. He doesn’t have any particular set he prefers to wear, but he does go for gold more than silver.

78. How socially skilled is your oc? Are they good at understanding social cues? How charismatic are they?

Theo’s actually very charismatic without trying to be and when he does intentionally turn on the charm (mostly when his parents are requiring him to be at their little soirées) he becomes irresistible. Being a moth caught in his light is… blissful. He picks up on social cues without breaking a sweat and is very good at playing along when he needs to.

But, on a personal level, Theo lacks a social life. He has the people he associates with at parties, but he doesn’t view them as his friends (even though they are…) and doesn’t communicate with them outside of the clubs they go to (even though they try to keep in contact with him). When he doesn’t have to play pretend for his parents, he’s actually pretty hard to get along with and most people resort to watching him from afar. He’s still charming, mind you, but he’s not… um, nice, exactly.

79. For what reason would your oc turn into a villain? And if they’re already a villain, vice-versa?

Honestly… Theo’s been put through a lot and he’s still good at his core, so I can’t imagine there’s anything that could turn him into a villain… that’s just not who he is.

80. What is your oc’s handwriting like? How easy is it to read? Can they write/read cursive?

Theo’s handwriting is even and strong. He doesn’t waste time by adding any extravagant details and has a print style that is consistent from letter to letter. He writes in print almost exclusively, but he does use cursive when he’s writing more formal letters. His cursive is similar to his print in that it’s written with a heavy hand and each stroke is dark and thick.

81. How good is your oc at drawing? What is their preferred art medium, and what is their artstyle like?

Theo’s never really sat down to draw before… or, at least, not since he was a child. Nevertheless, I do think he’d be good at it if he took the time to practice for a year or two. Theo puts his all into studying, so I imagine he’d work tirelessly at it. He’d do those one-drawing-a-day challenges and he’d push himself to think outside of the box. His art would be incredibly creative… I wish he’d allow himself that.

82. What would be your oc’s ultimate dream vacation? Where would they go? Who would they take with them? What would they do?

Theo doesn’t have an “ultimate dream vacation” in his back pocket… like, there’s nothing he fantasizes about. He can’t even think of a concrete destination that he’d want to go for a vacation. He would just get stressed trying to think of something and then he’d freak out about how far behind it’d put him academically… it’d ripple out to the rest of his responsibilities and he’d be lost. He can’t let that happen.

83. What is your oc’s favorite trait about themselves? What about their least liked? What would others like and dislike the most about your oc?

I’ve been thinking this over a lot, because, y’know, Theo really doesn’t like himself. He has a serious amount of self-loathing pulling him down, so it’s hard really coming up with anything he likes about himself. But I think Theo might actually like how perceptive he is, because it’s what keeps him safe. I’m not saying it’s his favorite thing, because that implies he’s got other traits he really likes and that’s really not the case. As for his least liked trait, I think Theo thinks his desires are sticky and pathetic and horrible.

In general, I think most people find Theo’s magnetism to be, well, very alluring. The combination of the way Theo carries himself and speaks has an appeal that draws people in. He’s interesting. At times he’s all sharp edges and closed off whereas other times he’s all blurry and open. As for what people dislike about him, it’s most likely how dismissive he is when you get off on the wrong foot with him.

Matthias in particular loves how intelligent and wry Theo is… and he actually likes how dismissive Theo can be with people. Really, he just likes everything.

84. Is your oc more masculine, feminine, androgynous, or something else entirely?

I think Theo’s pretty masculine, though he does wear some androgynous clothing on occasion.

85. What would history remember your oc for? How would they become famous? Or are they the sort that would really only be appreciated long after their death?

In the Echthroi universe, Theo isn’t someone who seeks the spotlight. However, that’s certainly something his parents want for him… hm. I think he’s well known in the upper echelons of his parents’ circle for his intelligence, his manners, and his arresting appearance. I think he’s also famous on his campus… I think a lot of people would like to covet Theo. I don’t think Theo would ever become proper famous, though… like, I have a really hard time even conceptualizing fame for him, just like I have a hard time seeing that for Matthias.

86. What would someone assume about your oc based on their appearance? Would those assumptions be correct?

Hm… on appearance alone, I think Theo gives off a sort of cool elegance. I think he seems doleful and… honestly, a little intimidating. He’s gorgeous, so… you have to be very confident to approach him. Most people would assume he’s dismissive and stuck-up… that he’s quiet… flirtatious…

I think he definitely does give the cold shoulder a lot of the time and he’s not very talkative, so those would be true. He’s not stuck-up, though… he does keep himself at a distance, but it’s not from some kind of arrogance or self-importance, but rather because he’s desperate to keep himself safe. He’s also only flirty when he’s intoxicated and it’s more reactive than pursuant.

87. What are some of your oc’s physical weak spots? What about emotional/moral ones?

Theo is weak to any kind of affection that’s all soft and sweet. He’s weak to being kissed, to being bitten, to fingers grazing behind his knees, to any kind of touch along his inner thighs. His skin gets sensitive when he’s touched and touched and touched. Emotionally, he’s weak to anger or violence. Morally, he’s weak to his own behaviors and can be unthinkingly cruel or hurtful without just cause. He’s weak to his parents.

88. Does your oc hold grudges? For how long? Does your oc have any rivals?

Theo will hold a grudge until his very last breath. He is very judgmental and forms all these little notions about people before they’ve even spoken a word to him… and then that influences every interaction they have with him afterward. So, you can be nice to Theo, but if he makes a snap judgment about you that’s unfavorable, then he’s going to blow you off. Is he wrong in the judgments he makes? Well… okay, so, not really? Theo is very good at reading people and there are very few times he’s wrong.

That said, Theo's grudges are only the petty, meaningless kind. When it comes to the people who really, truly deserve it, Theo is frustratingly forgiving. Or, not even forgiving, exactly, but rather... he just doesn't acknowledge the real wrongs that've been done to him.

89. What does your oc’s laugh sound like? How often do they laugh? Are they easily amused?

Oh, an angel’s choir. No, I’m kidding… kind of.

Theo’s laugh is very hard to come by because he doesn’t have very much to laugh about. He doesn’t even smile—like, really, truly smile—often. Theo’s pretty much stressed out and exhausted at all times. The only time he’s loosened up is when he’s using drugs to numb everything.

When Theo’s using, he smiles all lopsided and watery, but there’s no light behind his eyes. He’s put together all wrong, you know? He doesn’t really laugh, but he makes these quiet huffing noises when something’s funny to him, often a private joke he’s told himself in his own head.

When he’s sober and he laughs… it’s kind of devastating. The sound of his laugh is similar to his voice, all light and captivating, but there’s this quality to it… this unbridled feeling that Theo almost never shows… that catches everyone off guard. He laughs almost like a child, gasping with it and full-bodied. In that same way, Theo’s happiness and joy is clumsy and innocent. There’s no artifice to it, no rehearsed grace, nothing held back… he laughs until there’s tears in his eyes… and then he just starts crying.

90. Does your oc have any objects they could never give up? Why is it so important to them? Do they have any family heirlooms?

Theo’s deeply attached to his things so there’s a lot that he wouldn’t want to give up. If I had to pick just one object… hm… I think it’s a tie between his memory journal and the perfume his mother gave him when he was a teenager. His memory journal is what’s keeping him together at this point and he relies on it a lot. As for the perfume, it was a gift from his mother after he was accepted into Yale. He’d never be able to part with it (despite it not being to his taste) because it’s the only gift she’s ever given him.

He’s not in possession of any family heirlooms, but if he were then he’d worry himself sick over them. He’d be terrified of something happening to them and being responsible for it. God… he’d be a mess.

91. What is your oc’s typical posture like? Do they slouch, or stand straight? How much space do they usually take up, both physically and figuratively?

Theo has a respectable upright posture and doesn’t slouch at all. If he’s around his family he’ll stand rigidly with his hands behind his back, holding onto one of his wrists as he listens to the conversations around him. On his own, he tries to keep his hands down at his sides but often finds himself moving to cross his arms over his chest. He doesn’t take up much space physically and keeps himself rather contained, but figuratively speaking… well… Theo has a compelling presence and in that way he’s felt all around the room.

92. What trait does your oc appreciate or admire the most in others? Why?

I think Theo admires when people can just… exist with ease. That freedom he sees in others makes him feel envious and he wishes he had that for himself.

93. What is your oc’s preferred learning style? Observation, hands-on, instruction? Do they take notes or memorize?

Theo prefers to learn via instruction and direction. He wants to be able to read each step carefully and then double back when he needs to. He takes a ton of notes as he uses repetition to help him learn, so oftentimes he’ll go back over his own notes and write them out again.

94. Does your oc rely more on a logical or emotional mindset? What situations would this be the opposite?

I’d say Theo’s more on the logical side than the emotional side… but the way in which he uses logic does stem from an emotional place, if that makes sense? Deep down Theo is scared and just wants to keep himself safe, so he leans on logic more than emotions as he feels that emotions make him weak.

I think Theo’s walls come down in the face of genuine love and affection.

95. How is your oc about keeping someone else’s secret? Are they the gossiping type, or do they hold true on their promise to keep things quiet?

Theo’s someone who has a lot of secrets, so he’s very good at keeping them. I think he’d never want to break someone’s trust by gossiping. I mean, he also doesn't really have anyone he’d gossip to in the first place… still. He’d keep it to himself no matter what.

96. Describe your oc in three words. What three words would they use to describe themselves?

Oh, well… in order to describe him to others, I’d say Theo is reticent, touchy, and hungry at his core for something he hasn’t yet allowed himself to name (this isn’t one word, but you get it).

Theo has an unstable sense of self and has a very hard time understanding who he is, so when asked to describe himself he wouldn’t know what to say. Questions like this put him under a lot of stress… I think he’d dissociate just from being asked to try.

97. How old is your oc physically? How old are they in mental maturity? When are they most mature, and when are they the least?

Theo is in his early twenties (I don’t have an exact estimation for him, but somewhere between 21 at minimum and 24 at maximum). Mentally… there’s a lot of conflict and inconsistency there (intentionally done!). I’d say Theo is incredibly independent but he’s also financially reliant and emotionally dependent on his parents. He had to grow up at a very young age and in that sense he’s mature, but he also has a lot of childhood trauma and it’s definitely stunted him in some ways. I think Theo has… a very interesting mentality. He’s all over the place and he’s constantly at odds with his own self. There’s a lot going on with him at any given time. His mind is always racing.

98. Is your oc the type to have a lot of fairly good friends, have a small group of close friends, have one or two best friends, or have no friends at all? Who are they closest to?

Theo refuses to let people get close to him and believes himself to be unworthy of even platonic love, so no… he doesn’t have any friends. Or, rather, Theo doesn’t have anyone he thinks are his friends. In actuality, Theo has four friends that he’s picked up from his time clubbing. He doesn’t see them unless they’re in a party setting, so that might be why Theo views them as being mere acquaintances and nothing more… he puts his nightlife into a little box and tucks that box away in his mind.

99. What is your oc’s morning routine usually like? What do they eat for breakfast (if they have breakfast)? What time do they usually get up in the morning?

Theo wakes up and is kind of out of it for a few minutes. He lays in the bed and has to take stock of where he is first, because some mornings he finds himself in someone else’s bed. If he’s at someone else’s place, he’s dressed and out of there in under five minutes without so much as a goodbye. If he’s in his own home, he lays in bed for a while, staring without really seeing whatever’s in front of him. He gives himself those few minutes of peace and then he’s sluggishly pulling himself out of bed and getting ready for whatever’s on his schedule. He’s normally up by 7AM and doesn’t eat breakfast.

100. Does your character ever swear? How often? How vulgar is their swearing?

Theo swears occasionally but it’s not, like, in every sentence. He’s not particularly vulgar and instead just says the standard everyday swears. I think he says damn it under his breath more than anything.

#river dipping #ts4 #theodore doe #echthroi #a burning house to live in #oc extras #s: echthroi #cw child abuse mention #cw drugs mention #MOVE OVER MATTHIAS TIME TO GET TO THE MAIN EVENT <3 hiiiiiiiiiiii theo *twirls hair*#it's to be expected due to the length of this (11.5k...) but we're learning a lot about theo here :)<3 #rereading all of this while listening to his playlist got me down to song number 18 which is soda by nothing but thieves (tho i did end #up stopping to edit some things here and there) in case anyone wants to try and beat my time 🏁#but anyway. it feels so good to finally be done! i've been staring at these for nearly two weeks and doing next to nothing else #it's been crazy... expect me to me soooo annoying in everyone's activity feeds now btw... like i'm gonna start catching up either later #today or tomorrow depending on if i start feeling better soon (...i didn't mention it i don't think but i've been sick the last three days)#(pretty sure it's bc of the horrible air quality from the fires up north and my drafty house... love that <3)#but again i'll try to space out my catching up when i get to it

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marilynthornhilllover · 15 days

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I promise I'll look for you in a thousand life times.

Olivia crain x Fem!Reader

Warning: fluff, depression, anxiety, headaches, delusional, pills, sleep deprivation, sleep talking, nightmares, fainting, slight argument, sleep talking, pre kidnapping, almost suicide,etc.

A/N: all my THOHH fans tap in please, justice for our liv🥺. Btw this fic is a spoiler for anyone who hasn't watched the show yet, and most of this fic falls around episodes 1,4,6,8,9 and 10.

The crain family was.... different..... they weren't like other families and they knew that too. They weren't the normal family you'd meet on a daily basis. When you started working for the crain family as a babysitter, you heard many stories about the family.

How the claimed to see things. That Olivia was a witch. That the family believed in a whole lot of creepy stuff and even acted weird. That didn't bother you though.... why should it?... no one's normal, absolutely no one, no matter how hard they tried.

So what if the crain family acted a certain way, or maybe they just had special gifts that weren't quite understood by others.... and that's fine.

You met with the family for dinner three years ago, you met Nelly or rather Eleanor, theo or Theodora, Luke, steven and Shirley. They were decent kids. Kind, sweet, caring, funny even.

Something you admired about the kids were their passions. Eleanor tea cup parties, Shirley nature and taking photos, Luke adventuring or protecting Nelly. And then there were theodora and Steven who were always off doing their own things or studying something fascinating.

____

Then there was Olivia crain, Olivia was something else.... her aura was soft. She was pretty and smart and very caring and kind towards you. She loved her kids with everything in her.... her heart clung to them. She even said once that nothing or no one will ever be able to stop her from even dying for them.

The floor boards creaked as you made your way into the kitchen for breakfast. Slowing rubbing your eyes as the sun glazed partially through them from the sunset window above. You turned the corner one eye open, suddenly you bumped into someone. You stopped dead in your tracks and opened your eyes fully to see Mr. Hugh walking away quickly with a cup of coffee in his hands.

" good morning Mr. Hugh-" but before you could completely finish your sentence he was already gone from your sight. It's only then as you stood there you felt how cold the atmosphere setting was... as if someone had died.

You had only caught a glimpse of his face and something deep within told you that something was wrong this morning. You thought nothing of it and looked at everyone in the kitchen having breakfast.... except not happily.

" good morning, my loves" you spoke walking around the table to kiss every child on the forehead. There were mumbled and grumbles said back to you as you made your way into the pantry. You then noticed that you haven't seen Olivia. Which was quite strange since she's usually the first one up to help you a little bit with the kids.

You clicked the kettle and stood with your back against the counter as you waited for your water to get hot. You inspected the kids once again and something gaved you the chills. You sighed as your eyes landed on Nellie who was finding it hard to eat her scrambled eggs since they were very hot. You walked over to her and crouched down on your knees.

You tucked a strand of hair behind her hair and brushed down her fly aways. She smiled at you and you returned it.

" did you sleep well?" You asked her and she nodded chewing on another piece of her food. The real reason why you weren't the one to make the kids breakfast was because you were up the entire night with Nellie. Her nightmares are the worst. She claims she sees this lady that she calls " the bent neck lady" above her every time she opens her eyes at night.

The poor girl was scared completely out of her shadow last night, shaking and shivering in your arms, sobbing even. You sang her a little song and caressed her cheeks and brushed your fingers through her hair until she eventually had the courage to fall asleep and believe that you'd protect her.

You had told her parents above it, Olivia more times than Hugh since she's less busy and has more time to listen, and after all she was Nellie's mother but they both brushed it off as Nellie being at the age where she could handle herself.

Which is true, she was a big girl but she was still even scared of the dark, which is normal for a kid but Nellie was absolutely terrified at night, and that isn't normal. And then you had to sit at Shirley's bedside and hold her hand because she was sleep talking. Ever since the family moved to the hill house they've all been acting strange. Seeing things. Hearing things. Feeling them even. Mostly Olivia. She was the one you'd feared for more. Even more than Nellie.

" but mommy and daddy fought this morning and yelled" your brows quirked as your body stiffened. Hugh and Olivia..... fight?.... yell?.... again not normal. You tried not to make it too obvious to the little girl that you were surprised but instead tried to comfort her.

" Nellie! Don't tell her that!" Theodora shouted and Steven spiked back.

" theo don't talk to her like that! She's been with us longer than the others!" he spoke.

" so?! that doesn't mean she gets to know all of our business" theodora bit back as she stormed out, Steven quickly following behind.

" no but she's seen and heard us more than anyone has!" His voice got lower as they went deeper into the house where you could no longer hear them speak. You paid no mind to her though, she was always the feisty one, which was something you admired.

You stood there silently before Luke and Shirley placed their plates into the sink before walking past you shyly. You looked down at Nellie, searching her eyes for an silent answer.

" daddy wants mommy to go to her sisters house for the weekend because he thinks she's crazy" the little girl whispered before getting up from her seat and hugging you with tears in her eyes. You comforted her the best you could, rubbing her back and whipping her tear stained cheeks.

" it's ok Nel, I'll talk to your mom and dad ok?" She nodded and quickly exited the room, you stood there for a minute trying to process everything before you sighed deeply. You cared for Olivia and her wellbeing, especially for her mental state as of now. Olivia wasn't well. It's as the house was a vampire, sucking and draining every bit of happiness from her, plus the kids not being able to be comfortable in the house bothered her even more.

You noticed Olivia's pills in the kitchen counter cabinet, you walked towards the cabinet and took out the bottles, the one for her headaches, depression and anxiety. You walked back up the stairs and down the hallway into Olivia's and Hugh's bedroom. You weren't allowed in there but you needed to speak to Olivia urgently.

You knocked twice and waited for her to answer but there was complete silence, no approaching footsteps, no body shifting in sign of answering the door, nothing. Dead and spine chilling silence. As if there was no one at all in the room. You decided to twist the knob to see if it was unlocked, after discovering so you pushed the door and entered.

You then saw Olivia standing infront of the window in a beautiful red dress with flower patterns on it, her hair neatly tucked in her curls not a songle one out of place. What she was looking at remained unknown. You stepped further into the room and closed the door behind yourself. You waited for her to acknowledge your presence but it seems as if she never heard you enter at all.

You walked up even closer to her and noticed that her pupils were dilated all the way and there was only a thin line of crystal blue could be seen. Absolutely no sign of life in them.

" Olivia?" You called out her name softly, not wanting to snatch her from whatever mental state she was in too quickly to make it become prolonged. She slowly turned her head into your direction and smiled softly before her head snapped back to the window fast as if she was a cat haunting it's prey.

" do.... do you hear that?" She asked as she took slow steps closer towards the window.

" hear what?" You replied. At this point you were beyond worried for Olivia, she needed help, maybe Hugh's idea wasn't as bad after all.

" the whispers" she spoke up, before you can ask what whispers she shushed you by placing a finger onto your lip, tilting her head to the side as she listened again.

" there it is again.... they're calling Nellie's name..." her facial expression was unreadable, you couldn't tell if she was being serious or if the voices have really gotten the best of her. Tears filled her eyes as she leaned on your shoulder clinging to your shirt tightly with her fists.

" don't let them take her away please!" You held onto her tightly, gently letting both your body's fall to the ground. You brushed the hair away from her face and realized that her eyes were closed. She fainted..... you muttered ' shit ' before you lifted her body off the floor and placed her onto the bed.

Suddenly she gasped loudly as if she had drowned and had now been given CPR. You grabbed the back of her head and quickly sat her up against the head board. She sighed before softly started chuckling. She turned her head towards you and smiled. She raised her hand to your cheek and carefully caressed your skin.

" are you scared? Your pale" she chuckled biting her lip. You playfully touched her arm but you quickly had to pull it back. Olivia was as cold as ice, as if she wasn't alive. You decided to keep quite, she already has enough stress as we speak but she needed to know the truth.

" I think that you should atleast re think Hugh's offer, we only want wants best for you liv" you spoke clearly without a doubt In mind. Olivia's facial expression changed drastically as she looked at you as if she was totally flabbergasted.

" you believe him.... you think I'm crazy? You think that theses pills are what's allowing me to keep my sanity?" Her voice was hoarse and full of hurt.

" no! Of course not Olivia! But I want you to be able to be sane and think for yourself without the pills" she cut across you, stopping your sentence.

" but I am! Don't you believe me?!" She was getting railed up and that's the last thing you wanted to happen because it often doesn't end well.

" I do! But your not well Olivia can't you see?!" She paused, her eyes flickered as a tear rolled down her cheek. Her hand that was rested upon your thigh shook and you both looked down at the same time to look at it and she immediately looked away.

" I only want what's best for you Olivia. So please just for two days, get some fresh air, go to an amusement park or go on a nature walk" you spoke, gently caressing her thigh.

" i won't let them take Nellie away from me, not my baby" she spoke softly, leaning closer towards you.

" no one is gonna hurt them I'm right here, I promise" you whispered back, she kissed your cheek and rested her head on your chest before sighing. You both stayed like that for a while before she spoke up again.

" I wanna wake up... so badly.... why can't I just wake up...." She kept repeating this phrase over and over again and you could see the color draining from her eye. She's going to get a headaches. You quickly grabbed her compression pillow, her eye cover fabric along with her pills. You calmed her body by placing a hand on her abdomen then pushing the pillow behind her neck then placing the fabric over her eyes.

You tapped on her lips and she open her mouth to take in the pills, you brought the glass of water to her lips and held a hand under her mouth as she drank the water. She coughed slightly before turning her head away. You put down the cup and sat back down besides her. Eventually you fell asleep, this sudden tiredness washed over you as you fell into deep slumber.

You awoken in your room that the Crain's had provided for you in the house. There were thuds and loud bangs along with screaming being heard from the upstairs. You rushed up thinking someone may have broken in. Running upstairs that's when the sound of glass breaking and Olivia's screams can be heard.

" olivia!?" You call out as you ran down the hallway, you ran and ran until you felt as if you were out of breath, no matter how much you ran the hallway seemed to become longer. You could hear running footsteps everywhere.

" stop trying to take my babies away from me!" You heard Olivia scream in agony. Who's taking the kids? You tried to follow her voice as best as you could. All you heard and could hear was your thudding footsteps against the hardest of the wood and your racing heart beat.

A hand grabbed you by the waist and forced you to stop, you turned around to see Hugh, he had both Nellie and Luke lifted up in his hands both of them staring at you petrified.

" y/n we have to go now" you looked at him completely confused.

" no time for questions, the other kids are already outside in the car" you shook you head and stepped back. In the car? What about Olivia..... is Hugh the one who's taking her babies away?... before he can grab your hand again you bolted away from him with full speed. You called out Olivia's name but there was no answer, only that dead silent of the time when you entered her room. Remember the dead look in her eyes and ran faster.

You looked everywhere for her before searching upon the balcony. And there she was..... in her night gown about to leap off the edge. You swiftly grabbed her hips right before she could but it was too late.... you both went over. Falling in slow motion graciously. You could feel Olivia's fear, not of dying but leaving her children alone. Leaving Nellie and Luke out in the dark as they said. All your memories in life flashed before your eyes but the only person on your mind was Olivia.

Right before your body could hit ground you pulled her onto you. Your body hit the ground with a loud brutal thud. Your ears began to rang as you heard Olivia call out your name and touch your face, her hands still very cold. She grabbed the back of your head and placed it on her lap as she ran her fingers through your hair sobbing.

You smiled softly up at her, stretching your weak hand up to caress her cheek.

" why are you crying my love?" You asked and she sniffed.

" why didn't you go on without me?"

" how could I? " you asked, and she began to cry more and your eyes fought to stay open. You knew you were dying but you needed five more minutes for your last words. Olivia cradled your body as close as possible to hers.

" I couldn't let you die alone liv" you whispered as you slowly felt all your organs shut down one by one. Her eyes filled with more tears, clinging onto your shirt she whispered no over and over again.

" guess what...." You breathed as you breath began to leave your body.

" what?" She whispered.

" I believed you.... I always did..... you aren't crazy..." You gasped before tightly holding onto her hand.

" no, please, I'm so sorry" she muttered repeatedly as she left kisses all over your face.

Olivia will forever be grateful for your sacrifice and she'll continue to live for you.... because you'll forever live in her. Olivia did wake up.... you woke her up..... she stopped having her headaches. Nellie missed you the most. How you'd stay up with her and help her cope with her nightmares, how you'd swore to protect her.

" dont be, I promise I'll look for you in a thousand life times" and with that sentence you took your last breath. Olivia felt as your hand slowly realased hers as your body relaxed. She cried out loudly tears clouding her vision she tightly hugged your body.

There's nothing more you wanted than to die for Olivia crain. Noting more you wanted than for Olivia crain to not be dead. To not lose herself thinking that everyone thought that she was crazy or needed to see an psychiatrist or mental help. Because all the really needed was someone to listen. Someone to hold her. Be there for her..... she no one was. She gaved comfort but never received it in return.

It's sad that not even Hugh or her kids or Carla never once sat down with Olivia and talked to her like the normal human being she was..... they all thought she was crazy. But never once did they stop to wonder if she was truly ok. To actually listen to her for once. Because behind the dreams that she has, behind the headaches. Olivia was just a human being who wanted to find herself, who just wanted to wake up.

She'd die for her children. While someone else died for her. Olivia was heartbroken as she attended your funeral. Seeing how your mother broke down. She'll forever think about the opportunities you'd miss, her silly joke about pandas not liking macaroni, the family dinners, Shirley's random photos on a Sunday, Nellie silly tea parties, Steven's book speeches, theodoras crazy conspiracy theories, Luke's wild guess as to how trees can re plant themselves in outer space.

Most of all Olivia will miss your eyes, the way they'd lit up when she sang or when you were around the kids, your gigles when she told you a joke or when theodora chased you around the yard for Halloween. Your kisses, your hugs your words of affection and affirmation. She sighed as she pastor continued the eulogy. She looked outside the church and saw you.

You waved and winked.

" I love you" you whispered before flying away. She smiled.

" and I'll forever love you" she whispered back.

Hill house will forever have its history written in black and it's past owners reminded of the lives it took. But we must cherish our memories made because the rest is just confetti. Hill house.... not sane, stands against its hills holding darkness within. It has stood so for a hundred years and will stand so for a hundred more, and thoses who walk there..... walk alone, sorry and thoses who walk there walk together......

A/n: sorry not sorry to all the hearts I broke with this because where are all of the Olivia fics on here?!?!? Not even one🥺and my baby deserves better?!? Tbh if I was in the TV show I'd hold livs hand and jump with her😤. Anyway hope you enjoyed!

#Spotify #fypシ゚viral #fanfic #the haunting of hill house #olivia crain #love #sad #depression #delusional

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heliads · 2 years

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hi, lisa! how are you doing? i hope you’re feeling great!

i really love how you write theo raeken so here’s a request for him i hope you don’t mind huhu

im thinking of a theo raeken x reader fic kinda based on the song best friend by rex orange country

a jealous!theo wherein he thinks that the reader likes stiles because they are always together

then one day he just explodes and tells the reader his frustrations then the latter explains that she was just with stiles because he was avoiding him, afraid of spilling her true feelings for him since they were kids

is this too detailed? i hope my rambling makes sense 😅

thank you so much!! i’ll definitely catch up with your works as soon as midterms are over <3 have a great day!

- 💭

first of all this song + that idea SLAPS. usually in songfics i put the lyrics in but i was rocking so hard with this one that i didn't dare break it up with chunks of text that weren't mine, so i hope you enjoy!

masterlist

Another day, another dilemma. Theo Raeken is trying to fit back into the rhythms of the McCall pack, he swears he is, but it feels like every time he tries something happens to mess him up. He can sense himself spiraling into the same patterns, that familiar anger pricking at his fingers. Maybe he’s been wrong to try and pretend that he could ever be something other than this, some fury-ridden monster that could never truly find peace.

Today’s scenario isn’t terrible by Beacon Hills standards, yet it’s still set Theo’s heart rate spiking. He can see it now, perfectly framed by a town that will never truly have him, the one scene that Theo likes to see least of all: Y/N sitting right by Stiles Stilinski, the two of them smiling and laughing as if they’ve been best friends forever.

It shouldn’t bother him this much, even Theo in all his vengeful irritation can admit that. It’s just that the title of Y/N’s best friend used to belong to someone who wasn’t Stiles. Someone, for example, like Theo himself.

He can still remember what it had been like all that time ago, before Tara and the Dread Doctors and Theo’s life had fallen into complete chaos. He had been a kid back then, a real kid with real dreams that his future might contain more than monsters. How wrong he’d been to have such high hopes.

Theo knows the truth now, of course, that even without nightmares like the Dread Doctors he is fully capable of ruining his own destiny, but he hadn’t known it then. The child that Theo had been was far more than whatever Theo is now. That kid had been popular, well loved by even Stiles Stilinski himself. That kid had been perfect, or as close as Theo could ever get to such a standard.

And right there at the thick of it had been Y/N L/N. They’d been best friends forever, or so they’d sworn to each other, all up to the point in which Theo’s parents had moved and taken Theo with them. Just like that, his whole happy ecosystem had shattered, and the place that Theo had once occupied in the grand hierarchy of Beacon Hills had been smoothed over in what seemed to be a matter of minutes.

He misses that time just like every other kid misses their childhood. Sure, he’s probably looking at his memories through the strongest rose tinted glasses the world has ever seen, but it was good back then. He had no idea how to break a heart, or even bone. The worst threat to his life was that Y/N might have an argument with him and stop talking to him, but then again, that still seems to be true today.

Theo doesn’t entirely know what he was thinking, that he would stick around in Beacon Hills even after he killed Scott and expect everyone to treat him like normal. Stiles certainly doesn’t trust him, although that’s not confusing. Stiles didn’t trust Theo even before Theo played his cunning hand, and now the guy feels justified in his hatred.

Some part of him can admit, however, that he had been hoping for a little more from Y/N. She had certainly been happy to see him when he showed his face for the first time at Beacon Hills High School the night of the attack at the Senior Scribe. Theo can still remember how it had felt when she had run over to him and flung her arms around his shoulders, how he breathed in the scent of her and marveled at how it had stayed the same after all these years.

At that moment, Theo had been able to convince himself that he might be able to make it last. Sure, he’d have to reveal himself eventually, but once he switched sides for good and decided to ally with the McCall pack in the end, he had cherished that last desperate dream that Y/N might still be his friend, if not more.

That’s what this is all about, isn’t it? Theo Raeken has been a stupid crushing kid since he was a first grader figuring out what love was for the first time, realizing how a four letter word only made sense when he was staring at the girl who was supposed to be his best friend. He isn’t naive enough to think that Y/N could ever love him, not after he shoved his betrayal in all of their faces, but at least he could have her friendship, right?

At a bare minimum, she could talk to him every once in a while. Theo has more than proved himself, especially after helping get Stiles out of the Wild Hunt. Right now, they’re all back together in Beacon Hills, trying to figure out how to survive the latest twist in the hunters’ war. Theo has saved the pack from so many fights that he should have cleared out his ledger a long time ago, yet all anyone seems to see when they look at him is dripping, gushing red.

His worst critic is, of course, still Stiles. Theo doesn’t know that Stiles will ever change, but he had truly hoped for some sort of switch in emotion with Y/N. Yet he stumbles upon Y/N only ever spending time with Stiles. Theo doesn’t want to imagine the sorts of conversations they’re having, how many lies Stiles is feeding Y/N about how Theo will never be someone to be trusted. If Theo ever had a chance with Y/N, it’s surely gone by now, and it’s all Stiles’ doing.

Plus, Stiles is always so close to her. Right now, they’re sitting side by side on a bench in the courtyard, using their lunch break to sate their appetites for both food and protection. They’ve been discussing plans to get back at the hunters for a while now, but that doesn’t mean they have to lean so near each other. Surely Stiles doesn’t have to keep his hands so close to hers, right? Surely their knees don’t have to be pressed against each other?

Theo is being an idiot, he can tell that even without someone else bringing it up, but still. Yeah, he likes Y/N a lot. Yeah, he’s probably overreacting, but really, what else is he supposed to do, just turn a blind eye whenever Theo’s worst enemy starts flirting with the girl he likes?

Theo does his best to keep his complaints internal rather than external, but it gets difficult, especially when the rest of the pack arrives for lunch and he’s forced to sit right across from the Stiles-Y/N display and pretend it doesn’t bother him.

This only worsens when Scott announces that they should probably start doing patrols of the Beacon Hills Preserve in pairs, just to make sure the hunters aren’t reconvening at some of their favorite spots. Theo can practically hear the true alpha’s voice in his head announcing that Stiles and Y/N will be together, because of course that would just be the icing on the cake on a day like this. Imagine Theo’s surprise, then, when Scott instead says that he and Y/N should be together.

Theo blinks in surprise, but everyone else seems to be nodding along. Y/N flashes him a brief smile, although he swears that she looks almost nervous. Stiles definitely has something to do with this, doesn’t he?

Theo supposes he’ll have all the time in the world to figure that out for himself, all starting tonight with their first patrol. He meets Y/N long after dusk at the mouth of the Beacon Hills Preserve, flashlight in hand because even though he can see perfectly well in the dark Y/N has been able to avoid becoming a supernatural and she’ll need the extra light.

She thanks him politely, and even after they strike up a quiet conversation to pass the time, all of her remarks are still just civil, no more than ice breakers at a party nobody wants to attend. Theo can feel himself growing more and more vexed by the whole affair, and about ten minutes in he loses the war with his patience and just cuts to the chase.

“You really do hate me, don’t you?” He asks, hating how whiny he sounds.

Y/N, however, just looks startled. “What are you talking about?”

Theo gestures vaguely between the two of them, causing the beam from the flashlight to ricochet between the grass underneath their heels and the tree branches waving above their heads.

“We’ve barely talked about anything other than the weather and our after school activities. I mean, Y/N, we used to be best friends, and now look at us. If you want to switch partners for the patrols for someone whose presence you might actually enjoy, I’m sure Scott wouldn’t mind it.” He says, the words coming out in a rush.

Y/N shakes her head quickly. “I don’t want to switch partners.”

Theo’s lips flatten. “You sure? You could be with Stiles.”

He says the boy’s name a little too harshly, and Y/N picks up on it.

“What problem do you have with Stiles?” She asks.

Theo looks away. “Nothing! No problem at all. I’m sure he’s just great.”

Y/N laughs, the sound as brutal as the edge of a knife. “You’re a terrible liar, you know. Just say it. What’s your problem with Stiles? And for that matter, what’s your problem with me? You can blame this awkwardness on me all you like, but you’re not exactly a fantastic conversationalist yourself.”

Theo rakes a wild hand through his hair, desperate to hold his tongue for once, but it’s too late. He’s been wanting to say some things for a while now, at least now he’s got his chance. At least now, after he finishes his piece, Y/N can actually despise him for good instead of just hearing fake reasons to do so from Stiles.

“I’m sick of this. Alright? That’s it. I’m sick of the fact that I used to tell you everything back when we were kids, and I know I fucked up when I came here and tried to kill everyone, but I’m trying to do better. I have thrown myself in the line of fire over and over again in the hopes that something might happen that the rest of you might actually believe I’m trying to change, but it never works.”

Theo’s lungs burn from the force of the words leaving his chest, but he keeps going, never letting himself pause long enough to draw a breath.

“Worst of all is that it never works with you. I mean, the rest of them will always believe I’m a monster, but I never thought you would too. And now you spend all your time with Stiles, the one guy who hates me the most. I guess you forgiving me is out of the question when you ignore me time and time again to spend time with him.”

Theo opens his mouth to say something more, so used to the feeling of the hate rushing past his teeth, but nothing comes out. It looks like he’s had his fill of monologuing.

Y/N draws back, stunned by the sheer force of all that truth, but a moment later she’s leaning closer so she can fire back just as hard.

“Yeah, because all of this is Stiles’ fault, isn’t it? Not mine, not yours. Yes, I have been hanging out with Stiles, and you’re right about why. Stiles would never let you get close because he will never forgive you, so I stay close to him. If I stay with Stiles, I get to hide from you, because I am afraid of hunters, yes, and losing my friends, but most of all, I am afraid of you.”

Theo feels his stomach drop in his chest. He doesn’t know that he has ever felt this empty in his life, but Y/N continues speaking, filling that sudden cavity in Theo’s heart with more words.

“I’m not afraid of you because you’re a monster, Theo, even if you believe that more than the rest of us. I’m afraid of you because I know that the second I let you in, I’ll never be able to get you out. You have been everything to me since I was a kid. When you moved away when we were in fourth grade, I thought it would kill me. What would happen if you left again, now that things actually matter? I stay with Stiles and you stay away from me, and we’re all the better for it because my heart never gets broken. Is that enough forgiveness for you?”

They stare at each other for what could be seconds or centuries, both of their chests caving in and out from the rattling of such harsh breaths in their lungs. At last, it is Theo who closes the distance, who stoppers up the silence by kissing Y/N as hard as he can. It still isn’t enough, not to shut up the roaring sound in his ears that refuses to leave. He doesn’t know that it will ever be enough, but right here, with Y/N’s hands in his hair and his arms tugging her closer as if to meld her into his own skin, he thinks he might try.

When they finally break away, he’s staring at what feels like an entirely different girl. Theo has never before seen Y/N with that much luck in her eyes, her lip gloss smudged and shirt rumpled from where he’s been pulling it to get her closer to him. The sight strikes him as a masterpiece.

At last, she grins, and Theo feels electrified from head to toe. “I think that’s worth ruining the friendship,” she says, and Theo laughs.

“You know, I feel the exact same way,” Theo returns. He may not ever feel anything quite like tonight, how his entire body seems to hum in her frequency, but damn if he won’t like to try again soon. For once, all seems perfect.

teen wolf tag list: @thatfangirl42, @rogueanschel, @lovesanimals0000, @rafecameronswhore, @bellabadacadabra, @watchreadfangirlrepeat

#theo raeken #theo raeken imagines #theo raeken x reader #theo raeken oneshot #teen wolf #teen wolf imagines #teen wolf x reader #teen wolf oneshot #teen wolf theo #teen wolf theo imagines #teen wolf theo x reader #teen wolf theo oneshot

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shion-yu · 6 months

Text

Day 31 - Headaches/Crying

Headaches and CF don’t mix very well, but having a loving boyfriend helps. Whumptober 2023! I’m using the @ailesswhumptober's prompt list. This story is about my OC Albert - here’s his profile if you’re so inclined: https://toyhou.se/23743193.albert.

(Sending off the last day with some fluff. I did it y'all! 31 days of Whumptober DONE. My first and possibly last writing challenge lol. Thanks for the handful of y'all who read and reblogged, it really means a lot to me.)

Al had been nursing a headache for days now and Theo was trying not to bother him too much. The house was kept as dark and quiet as possible so as not to make things worse, but Al’s own worst enemy was himself. Headaches and CF were a tricky balance to manage. If Al didn’t let himself cough, he wouldn’t have proper airway clearance and therefore, would pay for holding it back later. On the other hand, coughing aggravated his headache terribly. Each time he coughed he felt a sharp pang strike like lightning from the tip of his head to the base of his neck. His morning fits were the worst, borderline unbearable because of how hard they would get. Sometimes they aggravated his headache so badly that Al thought he was going to black out from the pain.

Theo tried his best to keep his boyfriend comfortable. He made sure he had everything he needed - water, meds, ice - but there was nothing he could really do to truly ease Al’s suffering. He winced as his boyfriend let out several strained coughs next to him and whimpered in pain.

“I’m so sorry, baby,” he said for the millionth time. He ran his fingers through Al’s hair, one of the few things that often felt good for Al when he was like this. Al just groaned in response. His face was blotchy all over, several blood vessels broken on his face from the force of coughing after holding them back frequently. Seeing his miserable face made Theo’s chest ache with pity. “Is there anything I can get you?”

“No,” Al said hoarsely. He didn’t open his eyes even though Theo had all the windows closed already to keep out the painful sunlight. “Just stay with me. Please.”

“Of course,” Theo said easily, biting his lip in worry. He continued to run his cold fingers through Al’s hair. It was greasy and needed to be washed; Al hadn’t showered in several days and could use a bath. But that didn’t matter right now - all that mattered was doing whatever he could to ease Al’s pain, just a little bit. “Do you want a cold washcloth for your eyes?” He asked Al.

“Okay.”

“Wait here. I’ll be right back.” It wasn’t like Al was going anywhere, but Theo still said it. He hurried to the bathroom, running the cold water and wringing out a fresh washcloth. When he came back, he was shocked to find Al was crying. He was still on his back, but had his forearm over his eyes and his shoulders were jerking in a telltale sign of held back crying. Theo’s heart broke. “Oh, Al… Baby, it’s gonna be okay.” Theo got back into the bed and gathered Al in his arms, leaving the washcloth on the bedside table for now. Al let out a small, audible sob and held on to Theo’s shirt, shaking.

“It hurts,” he whispered. His voice crackled with the thick mucus he was delaying bringing up, despite his body screaming at him to do so. “I can’t take it, Theo.”

“I know, honey. You can do it though. I know you can.” Al always did. He didn’t usually cry though, and that scared Theo. His head really had to be hurting to warrant this reaction. “Do you want to go to the hospital?”

“Can you call my doctor?” Al sniffled. “I think I’m dehydrated.”

Theo frowned and pinched the skin on Al’s hand. The skin stayed up for several seconds, confirming Al’s suspicions. “Can they come give you fluids here?” Theo asked.

“I’ve had it done before,” Al said. It’d been a long time though. “I feel like if I move I’m gonna pass out.”

“Gotcha. Let me call,” Theo said. He gently detangled himself from Al and went into the living room to call where it was quieter. He explained the situation and the doctor confirmed that they could send the home health nurse that helped Al with IVIG sometimes to hook up some fluids. She could also assess if Al needed to come to the hospital or not. Theo thanked him and returned to Al with the good news. Al seemed relieved and fell quiet again, save for a few stifled, teary hiccups. Theo wanted to tell Al to cry away, that maybe it would help him feel better, but he was also sure the noise and added mucus wouldn’t do Al much good. Poor Al, Theo thought. He couldn’t even cry when he was in pain without it hurting him more.

Once the nurse arrived she ran 2 liter bags of normal saline for Al through his port and did an assessment, deciding he didn’t need to go to the hospital yet. “It’s quieter here,” she said. “I think he’ll be more comfortable and they won’t be able to do much at the hospital…” Except in very serious cases like surgery, Al couldn’t have opioids to ease the pain because they would slow his breathing down. So the hospital couldn’t do much other than what they had just done at home. At least Al was keeping his medications down, thanks to the prescription strength antiemetics he was on.

Once she’d left and Al had managed to nap for an hour, Theo asked him if he felt any better. “Yeah, I think so,” Al said, which made Theo sigh in relief. “Thank you.”

“Of course,” Theo said matter-of-factly. They were partners - Al’s pain was his own pain and Theo would do whatever he could to make it go away. He didn’t feel like he could do enough most times, but Al often reassured him that he made all the difference in the world.

“I’m sorry we can’t go to that show tonight,” Al mumbled.

Theo had genuinely forgotten they were supposed to see a random off-broadway play that one of his friends was in. “Oh, don’t even worry about it,” Theo said. “They'll understand. I’m sure they can show us some videos later.”

“But you love plays,” Al said dejectedly. He had one eye open ever so slightly. It was an improvement from earlier and made Theo feel hopeful.

“But I love you more,” Theo pointed out. “Besides, I wouldn’t want to go without you. It wouldn’t be any fun.”

Al managed to smile just a little bit. “That’s true,” he said quietly. Doing things without each other was boring. “Thanks, Theo.”

“Any time.” Over the years, Theo had gotten better and better at taking care of Al. When they had first started dating, it had been awkward at times. Theo hadn’t known how much was too much when it came to Al, who was very independent. But eventually they’d figured out the right amount of coddling so that Al could feel supported but not suffocated, and it had worked out well since then. Theo was proud of their relationship and no number of ruined plans could change that.

#ShionWrites #oc: Albert #ailesswhumptober2023 #ailesswhumptoberday31 #ailesswhumptober #day 31 #whump #angst #emotional whump #hurt comfort #headache whump #medical whump #chronic illness whump

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junglekarmapippa · 6 months

Text

B is for Balloon

The Alphabet of fluff - JF

Lily returned from the battle looking completely defeated. It didn’t go past RJ that she wasn’t being her usual bubbly self.

“I’m going to shower before my shift,” Lily said, walking to the bedroom area.

“What happened?” RJ asked Casey and Theo.

“Camille came to the restaurant in disguise and Lily gave her some advice,” Theo said.

“Oh.”

“She rubbed it on her face during the battle. Lily thinks she’s a terrible judge of character.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah, she feels fooled and defeated,” Casey told him.

“I see,” the Master said. “Well, get ready for your shifts, great work against Jellica.”

“Thanks,” the boys said and left for the rooms too.

RJ sat on his chair, thinking.

About half an hour later, Lily came out of the room area, her apron in hand. She was still sad.

“Lily,” RJ called for her, also coming out of the bedroom area, and putting on a sweater. “You’re free from your shift this afternoon.”

“RJ, I really need the distraction,” she pleaded.

“And a distraction you will have, just not at work,” he said with a smile. “Go ahead, put some clothes on, we’re going to the zoo.”

“The zoo?”

“Yes.” He smiled wider. “Trust me.”

She nodded and did as she was told.

RJ paid for the tickets and into the zoo they went. Even the bright-colored and beautiful animals didn’t seem to cheer Lily up.

“No cheetahs?” she asked.

“Sorry, no,” RJ said with a shrug. “I’m sure we’ll find something.”

“Like the wolves?”

“No wolves either.”

“So what are we doing here?”

“Taking a walk,” he said, stopping to buy two ice cream cones. “Tell me what’s wrong,” he said as they walked.

“Camille fooled me completely. I feel angry and humiliated and… like I trust too much, or too easily. I think I need to harden up a bit,” she said on the verge of tears.

RJ wrapped an arm around her shoulders. “I wish I could trust like you.”

“Did you not hear what I just said?” She asked him.

“Lily, you saw something good in Camille—”

“She’s a demon, RJ!”

“And you saw the good in her. That says a lot about you and none of it has to do with you trusting too much or too easily.”

He looked around them and found what he was looking for.

“Come on,” he told Lily and walked towards the balloon vendor. “I’ll have the yellow one,” he told the man with a smile and received the requested balloon after he paid for it.

He walked away from the vendor, the yellow balloon floating between him and Lily as they walked.

RJ found a rather empty gazebo and got inside. Lily followed him.

RJ showed her the balloon. “This is your spirit, Lily. Not your animal spirit, not your warrior spirit, just your own spirit, as Lily.” She nodded to indicate she followed him. “Now look:” he said. He put a hand over the ballon and pushed it down, then he released it. The balloon went back to floating above their heads. “It doesn’t matter how much you are mocked, hurt, or lied to. No matter what pushed your spirit down, it always floats right back up. That is your biggest strength, Lily, not everybody can do that.”

“She fooled me completely, RJ,” Lily said. RJ repeated the motion with the balloon.

“I wish I could trust the way you trust,” he told her again.

“What do you mean?” She asked.

“Finding it hard to trust is the most isolating thing in the world. It takes a lot for me to trust someone, even me, and that keeps everybody at arm's length. It’s very lonely.”

“RJ, I didn’t mean—”

“You have a gift,” he handed her the balloon’s ribbon. “You can see it float again, or you can puncture it and kill it forever. It’s up to you.”

Lily looked at the balloon but said nothing.

“Lily,” RJ said, putting a hand on her shoulder. “Don’t give Camille your smile. She doesn’t deserve it.”

With that he walked out of the gazebo and Lily stayed for a minute there, looking at the balloon. She was smiling when she joined RJ by the rail he was leaning against.

“Thank you, RJ,” she said with a smile.

“Glad you feel better, my little cheetah.”

#power rangers #powerrangers #fanfic #fanfiction #power rangers jungle fury #powerrangersjunglefury #Alphabet of fluff

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a-lil-bi-furious · 2 years

Text

If I Knew How to Hold You, I Would

a Sceo song analysis for @sceosource's Sceo Weekend

As I was working on this lovely collaborative series, it struck me just how much of a Sceo Song™️ its namesake is. I couldn't help but break it all down:

You didn't know your own heart Or how it might fit I'm in the house that you grew up in, where you Gave me it

It's giving bb!sceo. It's giving Theo coming out of his evil era and having a Moment™️ back in Scott's house.

Maybe he's thinking about all the ways Scott is still the same as he was when they were kids—loving, trusting, unbearably kind to everyone, but not sure what to do when it comes to himself.

Or, maybe, Theo's thinking about himself, and a time when loving Scott wasn't so complicated.

You said it makes you feel small That your heart is so big But you just gave a piece for some kind of Counterfeit

Scott has the biggest, most open heart, even when he maybe shouldn't. It makes sense that having such a big heart and giving to everyone else, he hasn't got much left for himself. Of course he feels small! He cares so much, and so deeply, and even if he won't say it outright, he's just longing to feel cared for that way, too.

As a result, he wound up giving some of that heart to Theo when Theo was planning to crush it. A trade for counterfeit friendship.

Counterfeit love.

(Continued below the cut)

Now the sun has gone down On a road that we chose You know your words are a light, you should Lead with those

Theo thinks there's really no path for them anymore. Scott chose to trust Theo, and Theo chose to destroy Scott. Snuffed out that fire before it could burn.

But! Scott came back! And, somehow, he's still a bright light through all the darkness, even if Scott can't see it. And there's no reason he should, Theo knows he doesn't deserve it, but Scott is still giving Theo another chance. Still puts some faith in him.

Then the song takes a turn, and it's Scott now:

Sure deliverance Lives through heartache What a difference your new start made Your deliverance For a namesake What a difference that a day[year] made

They've both hurt so much, and they've specifically got a lot of that between them given their History™️. And it's hard for Scott to truly trust Theo, and it's hard for Scott to let him in, but he also can't really help himself. Not when Theo's so clearly working to be better.

Neither of them are the same kids they were in fourth grade, but they aren't the same as when they were seniors in high school, either! What matters is somehow through the pain they've found a way toward the end of each of their darkness, and on the other side the sun shines bright on a new path they can choose.

The chorus is both of them:

How you long for me to find what you've been burying How your hands are too small for what they've been carrying How many words have I wrote down without saying it If I knew how to hold you I would

Scott's thinking Theo has to open up and stop burying everything deep. The good gets swallowed up with the bad, and how can the light ever reach him when he shuts and locks every way in?

Theo's thinking Scott has always tried to carry too much: the burden of everyone he meets, the crushing weight of the world, his own heart filled heavy with all the things he feels but doesn't share.

They're both thinking about the other and how much they want to be able to help, be close, but they just can't find the words.

If they knew how to hold each other, they would.

It finally circles back to Scott, the one (imho) most likely to initiate anything, considering who he is as a person versus Theo:

Will you open all your windows? I could hold you now

If Theo could just let him in, if they could just try...Maybe it's still hard to be vulnerable and trusting, and maybe they don't know how to hold each other yet.

But they can do it anyway.

They can figure it out. Together.

Thank you for coming to my SCEO Talk. Tune in next time.

youtube

#sceoweekend2022 #sceo #scott mccall #theo raeken #teen wolf #andrew belle #song analysis

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morvaris-archive · 2 years

Note

oooo how about 🌹🍁🍂 for candy and 🌻🌿🌸🌼 for sasha?? :) <3 hope u feel better soon!! sending u a hug + some snacks

thank you so much bones, esp for the hug !! <33

oc asks

🌹 Where in the world does your OC feel most at home? Is there any reason why? If it’s not the place they were born, where were they born? Is there a certain somebody that makes them feel at home where ever they may be? What does home mean to them?

on the road! it doesn't matter where they're going or with whom and for what reason, if they're driving around in their trusted car, they feel at home. the road makes them feel at peace, and the routine of driving calms them down more than anything could really.

candy was born in santa monica; but they weren't there for long. as soon as they learned how to drive, they took theo and drove away, because the city carried a lot of bad memories, and was too dangerous for theo, their brother. so you could say that they've been driving around for their whole life for even when they were still human and did some dirty work, they still relied heavily on their driving skill.

the true home for them, however, are people they care about-- theo, sasha, dove, lettow. if they're near them, even if they're just sitting silently, they are happy. they are home.

🍁 Where does your OC go when they need to have some time to themself? Would they ever have their own “comfort corner” filled with all the things they like? Do they have a favourite spot outside that feels like its theirs and theirs alone?

candy didn't had a comfort place for a long time; it's always been their car. they feel like shit? they get in the car, put the music on and drive as fast as they can. it worked, still does.

but since they settled with all of the stuff going on, they now do have a sort of a comfort place which is one of the rooms in sasha's appartment actually. he let them crash at his place, and they just stayed there, and with time candy filled it with their things.

it's not really a one spot, but they like to sit on the roofs of tall buildings. they can easily break in there and just sit, enjoying how small everything seems. how insignificant. and maybe their problems are, too.

🍂 Does your OC enjoy hugs? What do they do as a show of affection for: their friends, their family, their significant other(s) or for strangers? Over all what are they like with recieving affection from others?

short answer: no.

long answer: it depends on who is the person giving them affection is. they don't really enjoy physical affection, but they are fine with it from their friends and loved ones. it also depends on the reason. like if their friend needs a hug right now, they wouldn't hesitate to give one.

over all, they don't mind them, but they mostly like the feeling of comfort it gives them. the sense of beloning and safety.

as for how they display affection, they share. it goes for anything really— the place in their car (they might even let them drive it, but sasha is banned from this, driving privileges revoked), their food, their space, their time, their affection. they would sit with the person if they're sad, they would listen even if they are busy, they would drive to them if anything happens. anything.

but despite all of this.. they're not very good at recieving affection, because candy always expects a catch. they were among many people who did that (their parents included)-- tried to bribe them with affection and they take what they want and leave. so at the begining, they will be hostile, but they'll calm down eventually.

🌻 What little things do they notice about people or the world around them that make them happy? What tiny little treasures do they find in the normal every day that makes the world seem a little brighter for them?

it's a hard one ngl jshadjsdhsdj

he looks for things that make him feel alive. they might be insignificant to people, but for him they are. like if he sees a couple laughing, or someone genuinely enjoying themself, he'd feel envious a bit but it's still something that he notices immediately.

🌿 What way does your OC show that they care without using words? What way do others show your OC that they’re cared about without using speech?

he gets touchy, but not in an inapropriate way lmao. sasha simply wants to hold their hand, to touch the low of their back, to throw an arm over their shoulder, to walk togather so their sides are touching. it makes him warm, it makes him feel appriciated.

listen to him! it's a sure way to show him that you care-- listen to what he's saying, to what he has to say about a plan in motion, ask him for an advice first. he'll be full of himself, of course, but he'll know that they care. he's been disregarded a lot in his long life, make him feel important, and you'll never get rid of him.

🌸 What are some of their favourite things and why? List as many as you can think of!

sex ahem, moving on.

he likes flowers (give him flowers, i dare you). he likes the smell, he likes how they look, but don't expect him to know how to take care of them. pretty expensive clothes. this bastard knows he looks good, and he wants to look even better in good clothes. they make him feel more confident and powerfull. he knows people will judge him based on how he looks, and sasha likes to show that he'll judge them in return because he's good enough to do that. books. any, really, he likes to read to distract himself. science (?), idk how to word it, but he loves to experiment on people, he likes to discover something new, he enjoys watching chemical reactions etc etc etc.

he also enjoys rain, art museums and art in general.

🌼 Who are this characters friends and found family? How did they meet, how long have they been friends for, could they ever be something more than just friends? What do they look for in a friend or a romantic partner?

sasha.. doesn't have a lot of true friends. never did.

his closest friends at the moment is candy. they had a rocky start (candy literally punched him in the face so hard he lost his footing and fell), and no one would've thought that they would ever become something more than acquaintances, but with time and with more work they did together, they realised that they have more in common than both of them thought.

they've been friends for over five years now! unusually long for either of them to have a close friend, but there are a lot of firsts in this friendship for both of them.

could they ever be smth other than friends? perhaps, but they would have to meet under different circumstances. as things are right now, no, i don't see it.

there's also danielle and eli. danielle is not really a friend but rather a fling went wrong lmao. they were friends, but both of them fucked up, and now they can't stand each other. eli is more complicated-- they hope for something sasha just can't give them, and he keeps them around because they are usefull.

it's hard to say for what he's looking in a friend or a romantic partner; he doesn't really look for something, he waits for people to impress him. if they managed to do that, he'll approach them.

#thank you for the ask bones <33 #i enjoyed it a lot #nuclearstorms #♡: asks #my oc: aleksandr #my oc: candy

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splendidissimus · 8 months

Text

2003ish - "Being depressed doesn't make you unworthy." (Patronus)

((Content warning: depression))

Genre: romance

Romance level: high

Angst level: 3/5

Draco's headspace: low

((words: ~800))

------------------------------------

Theo let himself into Draco's study, leading a glowing silver little animal with his wand. The animal skittered around, low and long, and Draco at first thought it was a ferret, and was prepared to be offended, but it wasn't shaped quite right.

"You got it corporeal?" He stood to try to get a better look at the Patronus, if it would stay still. Theo helpfully directed it up onto the desk, where it perched on its back legs, looking at him. "What is that, a weasel?"

"Mongoose." Theo seemed pleased with himself.

"The snake-hunter? That's such a strange form for a Slytherin. It's perfect, you rebellious weirdo." He put his finger in front of the mongoose's face and tested to see if it would follow along, and it did, seemingly curious. After a minute it playfully bit at his finger, which had pressure but felt like nothing but a brief warm sensation.

"You sure you don't want to try again?" Theo sat down, and his mongoose playfully gambolled over the top of the desk and then off into the air.

"I'm sure." Draco retook his seat. "It is a waste of time, of course. Unless you expect Wiltshire to be invaded by Dementors?"

"No, it's just an enjoyable intellectual challenge. And it's good to be prepared — if we're ever in Diagon Alley and someone cries out 'Oh, is there a Patronus in the building?', I'll be able to save the day."

"I like that you're planning for all these likely contingencies. I can't tell you how many times I've been out in Diagon Alley and heard someone cry out for a Patronus and had to look on helplessly."

Theo smiled and left the mongoose to its own devices as it decided to invade Draco's lap. "You could do it, you know."

"It's well-known that Dark wizards can't produce a Patronus." He pet the barely-there creature for a second before he shooed it away.

"Putting aside iteration 487 of the 'you aren't a Dark wizard' argument—"

"Yes, let's. We'll call this one a draw."

"—some well-known propaganda horseshit, is what that is. I reckon Dark Wizards've got more reason to do it if they're trying to use the things; it's not like Dementors are known for being all that obedient and trustworthy. Look at Umbridge, she was complete evil, but we all saw her Patronus in the pictures of the trials." He idly held out his hand and the mongoose happily galloped back to it, then started playfully attacking it, trailing ghostly whorls of light. "There might be some merit to the idea that Dark wizards tend to look for easy solutions, and summoning a Patronus is damned hard so they're not likely to actually put in the work, but that's a matter of correlation, not causation, and anyway, I'm not even completely convinced it holds up. Some Dark magic is among the most effort-intensive I've ever seen.

"What it actually is is some self-congratulatory elitism, arbitrarily assigning moral superiority to the ability to master a difficult spell whose success is highly dependent on factors completely outside the wizard's control. A high-quality mediaeval righteousness fable wizardkind has collectively decided not to question because it inherently validates the nobility of its supporters and invalidates its critics as envious less-thans."

Draco watched him with some curiosity, chin resting on his fingers. "I don't think I've ever seen you so passionate."

"I am passionate. I'm pissed at us. You're a better person than I am by almost any metric, and the idea that you can't make a Patronus because you're somehow bad is personally offensive. A Patronus doesn't require goodness or moral fortitude. It just requires simple joy; if you can't make one, it's not because you're a Dark wizard. It's just because you can't find a happy memory because you've had a shit life."

"I have happy memories," Draco argued mildly.

"Do you have memories that are pure happiness? No complications or regrets or bad associations around the edges?"

He knew the answer to that perfectly well. Draco leaned back to regard him. "And you have? With your dead mother and Death Eater father and no friends? What is it, a particularly satisfying bit of research coming together?"

"Kissing you."

Draco did smile a little. "You're an embarrassment," he said fondly, going back to his papers.

Theo banished his Patronus as he came around to his side of the desk. "Being emotionally complicated doesn't make you evil," he said, settling his arm around his shoulders, and laid a kiss on the back of his head. "Being depressed doesn't make you unworthy."

He didn't trust himself to speak through the surprise lump in his chest, but he bowed his head lifted his hand to cup the back of Theo's in a silent thank-you.

#draco x theo #draco malfoy #theo nott #patronus #draco in his 20s #fanfic #draco malfoy fanfiction #emotional #draco is reflective #yeah im arguing with the author on this one #splendidissimus writing #draco is depressed

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thearchivistsjournal · 2 years

Text

Day 59,

Morning thought: I forgot to mention earlier between the headaches and running around looking for Theo, but when Lin left the day before yesterday she gave her archive key to Cass. That should make some things more convenient. Also, fitting that the apprentice should have a key.

*******

I finally met Theo.

Mere seconds after I unlocked and opened the door at the top of the archive stairs to the library entry room the door to the street opened up and in walked a grizzled old man with a lined face, a close-cropped grey beard, and a guard’s signature spear and breastplate. Unlike every other guard I’d seen, he carried a shield and wore a hooded ochre robe under his breastplate and a jagged metal shoulder pad on his shield arm. Without bothering to introduce himself, he closed the door behind him and said that he’d heard I was looking for him.

I told him that was correct and thanked him for stopping by. When I said that I had some questions for him about his time as interim archivist he told me that Pat was the one to go to if I wanted advice. He claimed he just recited whatever people wanted to know from memory so he rarely touched the books, and he’s no good with kids so Pat handled the rainy season lessons.

Throughout the exchange he never moved from his spot in front of the door, staring me down, and I reflexively mirrored this, staying rooted to my spot at the top of the stairs, tense without really knowing why and struggling to look directly at him for more than a few seconds at a time. Was that last part social anxiety, nervousness, or something else?

Doing my best not to sound accusatory, I explained that my question wasn’t a matter of seeking advice. That I’d come to the conclusion that there were volumes missing from the archives and wished to inquire if he knew anything about that.

He asked me what made me come to that conclusion.

I explained, as I had to Lin and Vernon, that I often found references to events, but no first had records of the events themselves. That there was nothing about the Village’s founding. Or even any records more than two hundred years or so old (and even those are all re-transcribed copies) even the oldest records I could find implied that the library and the role of archivist had been around longer than that. That after months of reading, I still can’t find anything on Cloud Tower besides being referenced as a landmark and only know people have ever been inside because Pat told me. And that’s still more than I’ve seen the ruined cathedral - not an hour’s walk out of town - mentioned, which is not at all. That all the stories written down appear to be brought by outsiders, and I can’t bring myself to believe that the villagers have no stories, myths, or folklore of their own. That there’s seemingly no record of events that Pat told me about, the voyage to the edge of the world being chief among them. That at least one person I have talked to about this was able to recall a specific volume of historical records that we couldn’t find.

By the time I was done saying that I realized that I was out of breath from talking fast and raising my voice. I’d gotten more worked up about this than I’d expected.

Unperturbed, Theo simply asked me if I had proof. That everything I’d just said was just a long way of saying the archive doesn’t meet my expectations. That doesn’t necessarily mean that books were there and then removed. They could have simply never existed in the first place. Surely I must realize by now how easy it is for an archivist to get cooped up down in the archive and not notice things going on to write down while they wait for news to come to them. Or maybe the really old books just all deteriorated too much to have worthwhile copies made. Being underground helps, but the Village is still warm and humid enough to be hard on paper and ink. And if someone thought they remembered a now-missing book being present before, it could just be checked out. Or that person could be misremembering. Most people’s memories aren’t as reliable as they’d like to think. No solid reason to think there was something nefarious afoot.

I remarked that I never said I suspected something “nefarious”.

He said that I wouldn’t be so nervous bringing this up if I didn’t.

I insisted that it didn’t make sense for there not to be books like the ones that seemed to be missing.

The old guard, hints of irritation beginning to show, said outsiders are always going on about that. Complaining that things don’t make sense. Never stopping to consider that maybe things just don’t make sense to them. Rarely able to accept that things are what they are and getting consumed looking for answers that aren’t there, usually dragging others down with them.

He paused for a moment, sighed, and then in a more sympathetic tone he told me that the outsiders that live the happiest lives here are the ones who learn to simply accept the world as it is and be at peace with that. By all means, go out and explore, see what’s out there and find sights that no one’s seen before. But just worry about the What and the Where of things. Don’t obsess over the Why and the How or else one day I’ll be throwing myself into the Endless Abyss or losing myself in Cloud Tower.

As he turned to leave after imparting that advice, I asked him if he was keeping something from me.

Without turning around he asked me why I bothered to say that. If he wasn’t hiding anything he’d tell me he wasn’t, and if he was hiding something he’d just lie and say the same thing anyway. And even if I came to the conclusion that he was hiding something, I’d have no way of getting it out of him. I have no way of knowing for sure one way or the other, so I may as well believe what makes me happiest. Just like everything else. Mysteries don’t have to have answers.

And then he stepped out onto the street and closed the door behind him, leaving me still standing in my own doorway at the top of the stairs.

What do I even say to that?

On the one hand, his parting words practically sounded like a confession of guilt to me. On the other hand his whole point was that, like most outsiders, I keep looking for foul play and mysteries that aren’t there, and those last things he said were a case in point.

And what exactly do I think he’s guilty of? Taking a bunch of books out of the archives and hiding or destroying them? For what purpose? To keep people from reading them? But the sort of books that would have hypothetically been taken would have by their nature been around for a long, long time without having caused trouble. To keep me, specifically, from reading them? But he would have had to do it before I arrived, and no one knew when that would be, much less that I would end up as Archivist. To keep outsiders in general from reading them? But the old archivist was an outsider and one of the ones that were content like he suggested I try to be.

I left the Village early today. Not really able to concentrate on anything else after that conversation. Spent the rest of the day at home (funny how I’m calling it that more and more without thinking instead of “the house”) with my mind going in circles, trying to decide what to make of that conversation, replaying it over and over in my head, and ultimately not coming to any conclusions.

Well, maybe one conclusion. I need to talk to Pat.

What to say to him about this, I have no idea yet, and I sort of doubt I’ll get any more answers than I got from Theo. But still…

<==Previous Next==>

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hysterialyywrites · 2 years

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part iii: protector

Theo was eleven when the cold first came.

“Did you hear about Gido?”

He didn’t understand then why the cold would burrow itself so deep under his skin, as if it was meant to find a home in his bones. He only realized what it meant when he heard about his father in the whispers that stole past his cottage window at the crack of dawn, when the death had already passed.

Thieves. Ambush. The Hunters scurrying and fleeing like rats in the dark.

“Should’ve expected it, shouldn’t he? That’s what he gets for trusting someone else so easily.”

“Partners. Ha! It was only a matter of time before one would betray the other.”

A team of two among the Hunters. Rare in the history of the village. Looked down upon, because being a Hunter was known to be a solitary endeavor. A Hunter operated best when he operated alone.

“Gido was a fool to try to hold them off. Ozal was right to turn tail and run. He had his wits about him.”

Betrayal. Theo’s father died because his partner decided to save himself.

“Had. Doesn’t seem like he has any of that now.”

When Ozal returned, he barricaded himself into his cottage. The paranoia was evident: a wild-eyed mania, uncontrollable shakes, an almost feral look on his face, or so Theo heard. He refused to speak a word about what had happened that night. The story of Gido’s death came instead in bits and pieces from the Hunters that came before him.

It was expected then that Ozal would no longer continue as a Hunter from that day forth.

“Gido was a fool.”

That was always how the story ended. It seemed a good reminder to the village that the system they abided by holds true, that self-preservation is the only way to survive.

Theo’s first lesson then from the village as a child was that to trust someone with your life means death. It conflicted so strongly with the one lesson his father persistently taught him, that to trust someone with your life means you’ll go far. Together.

Together was a lie.

Theo swore by that lie, seared it into his mind, tried to undo the years of propaganda that was done onto him by his father. But Gido was persistent, even in death. His lessons have burrowed themselves deep in Theo’s heart, and it’s all Theo can do to deny these lessons a sliver of hope that the village could be wrong.

But when Ozal drives a stake through his own heart the very next day, Theo is convinced there’s no other truth than the one taught by the village. Together meant death. He swears to live by its values for the rest of his life, determined not to meet the same fate.

(But still, his father is persistent. Even in death. Theo will long for a connection, no matter how hard he will try to deny it.)

—

Theo is sixteen and has spent the past five years of his life living with the cold in his bones.

“That old codger still after you?”

When Aizen speaks, it’s with a confidence that boasts of his ill-gotten victories against the weaker kids in the village. For years, Aizen has built an untouchable reputation as the village roughneck, standing above the others with sheer power alone.

“You could say that.”

Theo has also spent the past five years of his life taking. It didn’t matter to him what he took, whether it was his neighbor’s clothes hanging out to dry or random trinkets from stalls in the village square when the merchants weren’t looking. The thrill of his crimes would set his heart ablaze, and for a moment he’d forget. But after the highs always come the lows, and the cold always remembers to come home.

“Isn’t he annoying? Been five years already. What’s he want with you again?” Aizen asks, looking out at the crowd.

As if in acknowledgement of Theo’s grit, Aizen took Theo in as his second-in-command. Now Theo would also get into fistfights, impressing Aizen even more by never losing one. But winning or losing never really mattered to Theo. Nothing did, except staying alive. His crusade with Aizen is nothing more than a precursor to this very motivation.

“To take care of me, I guess. Ever since my dad died,” Theo replied.

Aizen scoffs. “What’s that, some Hunter obligation now? Some Hunter dies and now you gotta take care of their kid? Do we have to do that after we get initiated?”

“No, Ravn’s…” Crazy. Dull-witted. Simpleminded. A moron. He could list Aizen’s favorite insults by heart, but it still wouldn’t sit right with Theo, not after five years of Ravn’s perseverance (and Theo’s consequent stubbornness). “Different.” That’s fine. Safe. “He’s just different.”

“If his weirdo son is anything to go by, then yeah they’ve all got some screws loose.”

Ravn’s son, Kai. Tall and skinny, but not malnourished. Messy mop of wavy brown hair. Small, thin eyes. Helps out at the village doctor’s clinic with his younger sister. Feeds the strays. Talks to the orphans. Unbearably kind. A nobody. A weakling. A fool, like his father.

Aizen clicks his tongue. “C’mon Theo, we have training now.”

He gets up to leave, Theo following close by. The latter finds it bizarre, training for an occupation that led to his father’s own demise, but he feels there’s nothing else worthwhile to do in this village. When he makes his way toward the forest, he sees Ravn’s son among the masses, his gaze scanning the crowd. For a moment, it seems like his eyes lock with Theo’s. It sustains. And then it passes. But it’s enough for Theo to decide.

Theo then makes sure to visit the village square at least once a day. He rationalizes, thinks he’s doing Ravn a favor, keeping his son out of trouble. He keeps Aizen in check, redirects his attention whenever Kai is close by, making sure the latter finishes his errands without incident. And he can’t help but think, all pretentiousness aside, that Kai is doing something similar for him too, because for every new scar he sustains at training, he finds a new batch of ointment or medicine along with the rations Ravn leaves by his door every once in a while.

When their eyes lock, it takes everything in Theo not to let it linger. He makes sure nothing more comes out of this illicit, mutually beneficial arrangement, because he learned early on that to trust someone with your life means death.

It feels like death too, when one night he wakes up in a cold sweat, feeling the death of another Hunter. Nights like this aren’t uncommon, but against his will he remembers a particular night, five years ago, when his own father died. Betrayed.

He tries to fight the cold, tries not to think which Hunter didn’t come home, tries not to think but what if it’s Ravn? And he curses his pride for trying to survive without him.

The next morning the murmuring starts.

“Did you hear about Ravn?”

No, I don’t want to hear it. And Theo makes sure of it.

He doesn’t think he’s missing much by living as a recluse for the past few days, barricading himself in the cottage like Ozal once did. Both hunter training and terrorizing Aizen’s litter of weaklings doesn’t offer much respite. He thinks it’s better in the cottage, where he doesn’t have to worry about facing the son Ravn left behind. But he thinks about it, and Theo feels his own despair expand like the scorching summer heat.

The next day, a knock at the door sends Theo reeling. He knows it’s him.

Theo doesn’t want to, but he feels a pull. A warmth. A hope. A lesson burrowed deep in Theo’s heart breaks the surface and he wants to believe there’s truth in a long life together.

He opens the door, his eyes adjusting to the sun from the darkness of the cottage. For a moment the two boys stare at each other, seemingly equally dumbfounded. Theo notices the bloodshot eyes and the puffed up cheeks. Grief doesn’t suit him.

Kai finds his words first.

“You haven’t been coming.”

Theo nods, purses his lips. “I haven’t.” His throat feels scratchy from days of disuse.

“So I came to see you.”

Theo then remembers his father’s words. To trust someone with your life means you’ll go far. Together. He refuses to admit he’s gone this far because of Ravn. But deep in his heart, he knows. (Gido is persistent, after all. Even in death.)

And here now was Ravn’s son.

Theo thinks back to the night Ravn died, how he nestled into himself, trying to draw all his warmth towards him, trying not to think of wavy brown hair and small, thin eyes and kindness and hope and warmth. But he did. And for a moment his heart was ablaze once more, blind to the stolen life of a Hunter that night.

Theo longs for a connection, no matter how hard he tries to deny it.

“Did you now?” he says.

“I wanted to see if you were okay.” Kai admits before realizing what he said. He quickly shakes his head. “I mean— how you were doing. It’s been days since… y’know… and I was hoping to give you your usual rations at the square, because I didn’t know how you’d feel if I went straight to your door… but you never came so…”

It was only then that Theo noticed the familiar basket in Kai’s arms, the one he got used to seeing outside his door so often. He felt a pang in his heart, seeing it again, this time in the hands of a boy who made the extra effort to see him when Kai should’ve been the one holing himself up at home, mourning the loss of his father. Not Theo.

He takes the basket, accepts it properly for the first time.

“Thank you.”

Kai smiles despite the grief, and Theo thinks he’s glowing.

Not long after, he realizes what betrayal feels like. But not from the side of the betrayed.

It’s a particularly vivid scene. The blistering summer heat. The sound of the cicadas. The scorching humidity pressing onto his skin. Kai on the ground, Theo shielding him from Aizen and his group of bullies. He senses a critical turning point. A betrayal. Theo branded as a defector, a traitor.

“You’re kidding me, Theo,” Aizen spits, outraged. “You’re siding with this nobody?”

“He’s somebody to me,” Theo says, surprisingly calm. “More than you ever were.”

He raises his arms, ready to fight. For the first time, Theo finds purpose in power.

—

Theo is seventeen when he finds out that Kai wants to leave the village. Shion, Kai’s mother, had just disappeared then, and it’s as if it triggered an outburst in Kai that Theo had never seen before in their one year as friends.

“But Kai, it’s dangerous out there,” Theo exclaims. Hunter training had told him enough to know without ever having to venture too far from the outskirts of the village: Hunter initiates were trained well enough to be able to kill a man, more so than mere game.

If Theo didn’t know any better, that was probably what the final ultimatum of being a Hunter was all about. But Theo knew Kai wouldn’t understand, not when the latter stopped his own training within three days of his father’s death.

“You think Soran hasn’t already told me that?” Kai points out, exasperated.

Of course, Soran knows, Theo thinks. Better than I do. She was initiated the year Ravn died. The year I stopped going to training.

“Why did you stop?” Kai asked, as if reading Theo’s thoughts.

“Because you did.” Theo shrugged. “I didn’t want to become a Hunter if you didn’t.”

—

Theo is eighteen when he realizes Kai best responds to wounds.

When Soran comes home with an injury visibly worse than the last, Kai becomes noticeably less vocal about his desire to leave the village. Theo then begins entertaining a plan to drive the idea from Kai’s mind entirely, all while satisfying both his and Kai’s curiosity about what lies outside the village; Kai thinks it’s a better life. Theo thinks it’s humans, the kind they seemed trained to kill. But Theo doesn’t say this, because Kai doesn’t need to know. Kai glows better when he’s ignorant. Protected.

Theo uses Soran as an excuse. He needs his own reason to leave the village. Something that Kai could understand. Something he can’t oppose, at least not directly. The scars are important, he thinks. I need to show him what it’s like. I need him to know he’s safer where he is, where his family is. And he knows Kai, knows how much he loves his sisters. He knows how much he shakes whenever the air would grow cold and Soran hasn’t come home yet. Knowing this is enough for Theo to decide.

But to lie to someone like Kai pains him more than any earth-bound scar.

“You got a job with Wuon?” Kai asks when Theo starts carrying out his plan, the excited curl of his voice tearing the latter’s heart apart. It’s not completely a lie though, Theo tells himself.

“Yeah.” Theo manages weakly. “He says he needs more muscle around the forge. A blacksmith’s job suits me well, don’t you think?” he continues with a smirk, finding it easier to feign confidence than to conceal fear.

Fear? No, I’m not afraid. He looks at Kai and he’s glowing. How can I be afraid?

“It does!” Kai answers enthusiastically, and Theo feels his chest swell. “I’m glad it’s with Wuon too! I like him, he’s nice. He drops by the orphanage a few times to talk to the kids, gives them toys when he makes some. He’s got a really good heart,” Kai exclaims. Then he smiles at Theo, the warm kind that he loves, as if it was reserved just for him. “I’m really glad, Theo. You’re in good hands. Wuon will take care of you.”

“Yeah,” Theo agrees.

And I’ll take care of you.

—

Theo is nineteen.

The air is starting to grow cold.

“Theo,” Wuon starts, his voice wary. “You’re not going to do what I think you’re going to do, are you?”

“Why even ask that question when you already know the answer?” Theo replies with a dry chuckle, getting ready to leave the forge. He grabs his knife from the counter, regarding it regretfully. “I’m sorry you had to make this for me. I know you don’t like forging weapons.”

“Theo, I know I agreed to help you. I have a soft spot for you kids, and I know you have good intentions, but you can’t go on like this. Those scars aren’t a joke. Enzy can only do so much. I’ve told you before, sooner or later you won’t be able to come back, and that’ll ruin Kai. Did you ever think of that?”

I have, Theo thinks. He’s thought about that ever since he started shadowing Soran, ever since he saw for himself how dangerous it really was to be outside. But Wuon won’t understand. As long as Kai’s alive, he won’t be ruined.

“Maybe it’s Soran tonight, did you think of that?” he snaps back, albeit unintentionally. Then his voice softens. “I owe you a lot, Wuon. Covering for me whenever he’d come around, offering me an actual job here when I only suggested it as a front for my plan,” he explains. “But I have to go.”

“Honestly, the one time you stay here…” Wuon sighs heavily, running a hand through his soot-stained hair. “She’s supposed to be good isn’t she? Initiated after only three months—she’s better than you, Theo. Should you really be worried?”

“You don’t know what it’s like out there,” Theo says, his voice small. “Soran’s strong, but those… things,” Theo purses his lips. Then he looks up at Wuon, his eyes hard. “They’re stronger.”

“The monsters?”

“No… no, not literally, at least.” Theo gives Wuon one last look, a grave smile on his face, before turning to head out. “You know the drill, Wuon. Not a word to Kai.”

“I can’t stop you, can I?” Wuon asks, faint desperation in his voice.

Theo shakes his head. “I won’t forgive you if you do.”

Then he leaves the forge, stealthily making his way towards the edge of the forest.

written: may 19, 2022

from the cold draws its power from a dying fire (series)

next >> part iv (finale): frost

#vignette #writing exercise #dialogue study #conflict study

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aelwynrights · 4 years

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a crown of candy textpost meme: pc edition this time

bonus ruby, jet, and liam:

#dimension 20 #a crown of candy #acoc #a crown of candy spoilers #acoc spoilers #shitposts #princess jet rocks #princess ruby rocks #count liam wilhemina #sir theobald gumbar #king amethar rocks #chancellor lapin cadbury #cotton candy temple cotton candy monk #cumulous rocks #tumblr hates images i apologize for the quality #could NOT find a good one for theo on his own no matter how hard i tried

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watchmegetobsessed · 3 years

Text

BABY MAMA

A/N: woke up and just knew i needed to write about dad Harry, bc lets be honest, he is my fav. this fic is perfectly fine as a oneshot, but if you'd like, it could be a sequel to Grammy Winner Husband and Baby Grammy, i wrote things to line up with them!

PAIRING: Husband!Harry / Dad!Harry x Reader

WORD COUNT: 2k

masterlist

The arena is blowing up, the fans are screaming from the top of their lungs and Harry is putting out a show just as good as the previous ones have been. He is blowing the stage up, singing, dancing, joking around with the fans, enjoying this time he gets to spend with the people who got him to this point in his life. He’ll never be not grateful for what he has, what he is experiencing, no matter how hard this life can get sometimes.

“Dallas, how are you feeling tonight?” he asks in the mic as he walks back to his water bottle to have a few sips. The crowd erupts, the screams almost burst his eardrums, but he just chuckles, easing his thirst with some water before he returns to the microphone stand.

“Are you enjoying yourself?” he teasingly asks, though the reaction is the same. Insane screaming. “Alright, let’s move this show on before you get bored,” he chuckles playfully, the band starts playing the next song and he is back at what he does the best. Performing.

Though not far from the arena, there’s someone who thinks there’s something he is even better at than performing. That person is you, and you’re one hundred percent sure Harry is best at being a father to your five months old son.

Owning the stage, putting out the utter best he can, Harry’s thoughts still wander away from the show he is supposed to be focusing on. He can’t help it, his instincts are just completely drawn to his baby in the hotel suit, dying to know how he is doing. Leaving for the show late afternoon was harder than usually, because baby Theo was having a fever and coughing quite badly. His heart was breaking that he couldn’t help his son, didn’t even know what could be done for such a tiny baby.

“Love, he’ll be alright, okay? The doctor is on the way, it’s gonna be fine,” you told him gently as he was cradling Theo to his naked chest, always so eager to be skin-to-skin with him. Harry kissed his soft little curls on top of his head before nodding, though you knew it was eating him away.

“Call me or Jeff if something happens, okay?” he told you, handing Theo over to you, who was finally asleep after fussing for hours.

“I will,” you nodded, but he cupped your face to make you look at him.

“Y/N, I mean it. I’ll come off the stage if—“

“You won’t come off the stage, Theo is gonna be fine, he just probably got a cold from the aircon at the greenroom in Denver. He’ll be here when you get back, okay?”

He knew this tone, this was your momma bear voice and he would never argue with you when you used it, so he just nodded, kissed you and then Theo’s chubby cheek before heading out.

Now as he is nearing the end of the show he can’t help but think about finally being back at the hotel with his wife and baby, though he won’t let it be seen how eager he is to get off the stage.

The last song passes, the whole arena blows up from the energy and he is throwing kisses everywhere as he heads off the stage, down the aisle that leads him backstage. As he puts on his mask he turns around one last time, throwing some more kisses around to his beloved fans before disappearing behind the curtains.

“Did she call?” he instantly asks Jeff instantly, who hands him his phone over, a text from you already waiting for him.

Doc just left, everything is fine, left some meds for bub. Love you Xx

Even though this is what you told him before too, he feels relieved that the doctor confirmed it, but he still can’t wait to see the two of you.

“Alright, get the car ready, I’m leaving in ten,” he tells Jeff.

“Got it,” he nods, not even daring to argue with him. He knows better than to stand between Harry and his baby.

His legs bounce nervously on his way back to the hotel and he jumps out of the car as if it was on fire, running inside in a rush. He swipes the keycard through the reader on the door and opens it quietly, scanning over the place for you and Theo and there you are, sitting in one of the armchairs with his sleeping son in your arms, your hand gently tapping on his bum. You must have just finished feeding him, because a rag is still thrown over your shoulder and your shirt is all wrinkled around your chest. Theo loves playing with the fabric while you breastfeeding him and Harry loves watching his tiny fingers grab onto it and massaging it aimlessly.

“Hey,” he breathes out, quietly pushing the door closed behind him before he walks over, kneeling in front of you. He kisses Theo’s forehead first, before pressing his lips to yours too. “How is bub feeling?”

“He is doing good. The doc gave him some meds for the fever and we have a syrup for the coughing. He said he’ll be fine in a few days,” you softly explain to him, nodding towards everything the doctor left you on the coffee table.

Harry grabs the bottles, inspecting them as if he knows anything about medicine and you can’t help but smile as he furrows his eyebrows, reading the packaging.

“Want to put him to bed?” you ask him, his head snapping up right away.

“Of course,” he nods eagerly. You both stand up and he carefully takes the little boy from your arms without waking him up. “Hey bubs, I missed you,” he coos at Theo and as you watch him sway with the sleeping baby, your heart could easily burst from just the sight of them.

You didn’t know what life would be like as a family of three. After Harry posted a picture of you with his Grammy award and your belly ready to pop, the whole world went crazy over the fact that Harry Styles is going to be a dad. Despite the buzz, you managed to stay hidden for the rest of your pregnancy and just three weeks after that post, Theodore Styles decided to come to the world. Harry cancelled everything for the first two months, it was just the three of you, showering in the joys of parenthood. You had all the ups and downs, but you wouldn’t have had it any other way.

Then tour got rescheduled and Harry was hesitant whether it was a good idea to go on the road with a five months old.

“Sarah and Mitch are coming too, she gave birth a week after me,” you reasoned when Harry was about to cancel the whole tour. It took you some time to convince him that it’s gonna be fine, though you knew he would be extra cautious with Theo.

Now as you see him gently sway his way to the bassinet next to your bed, knowing that he just performed to thousands of people and now he is here with you and your son, you wouldn’t change it to some peace at home. Besides, you’re convinced tour is gonna do good for Theo, make him get used to people around him, not just the two of you or the grandparents and aunts. During the first night in Vegas, he barely spent an hour in your arms, everyone wanted a piece of him and you gladly let them befriend him, especially because he loves meeting new people, just like his daddy.

As Harry lays him into the bassinet and stands next to it with a lovesick smile on his face, you sneak behind him, wrapping your arms around his waist. He smells so fresh, he surely had a quick shower before heading back to the hotel, but you’re already planning to seduce him to join you for a quick shower as well. He won’t say no.

“Watched a livestream for a bit, you were so good,” you hum, kissing his right shoulder blade and you don’t miss how he leans back against you. “Loved the shimmery outfit.”

“Yeah?” he chuckles softly. Reaching around, he pulls you forwards so he can wrap you in his arms, kissing your forehead gently. “I missed seeing you dance at the side,” he smirks at you and you don’t miss the reference to the old times.

On his first solo tour, when you weren’t even married yet he often caught you dancing like crazy at the side of the stage, it would always make him laugh mid-song and you loved hearing his giggles through the mic, so you often did it on purpose. A few nights ago in Vegas you did the same, but with Theo in your arms, a massive ear protector on his head so the noise didn’t hurt him. When Harry spotted you, he almost started crying, he mouthed I love youand then carried on with the show.

“I’ll be there soon,” you smile at him, cupping his face in your hands to pull him down for a kiss that’s more than just a peck. “Now, I need help with something,” you mumble against his lips.

“Anything, baby.”

“I need you to help me shower,” you tell him cheekily. He pulls back and stares down at you with a playful grin, his hands already wandering under your shirt.

“Oh, is that so?”

“Yeah, I need someone to wash my back and… maybe somewhere else,” you hum seductively and start pulling him towards the bathroom, peeking at Theo one last time, but he is sleeping so deep, the two of you can have some alone time.

“Alright, I could never deny anything from my favorite milf,” he grins, but you smack his chest with a gasp.

“Harry! I told you not to call me that!” you protest, the two of you walking into the bathroom not to bother the sleeping baby in the room. You start running the water right away so it can be nice and hot for you when you walk in.

“Why? You are a milf,” he smirks, so full of himself, already pulling his shirt over his head.

“Then you’re a dilf, just so you know.”

“Baby, my fans have been calling me that for years, even before Theo,” he chuckles softly.

“You were destined to be a dad,” you giggle, getting rid of your own clothes. “Hey, if Theo feels better tomorrow, we could maybe take a walk in that park we saw on the way here,” you suggest, but when no answer comes, you look at Harry and find him just standing there, fully naked, staring at you grinning widely. “What?” you ask, glancing down at your own naked body. Suddenly, you are way too aware of the weight you haven’t been able to lose after giving birth, the stretch marks on your waist and how you��re not at all freshly shaved. Just as you’d move your hands to cover yourself a bit, Harry grabs your wrists and stops you.

“You are so fucking gorgeous, baby,” he hums, dropping his head until his lips could reach yours.

“Stop being such a flirt,” you giggle, feeling your face heating up.

“It’s the truth! I have the prettiest baby mama and that’s a fact.”

He looks at you with so much love and adoration in those beautiful green eyes, it almost makes you cry, knowing that this man is your husband and you get to spend the rest of your life with him.

Wrapping your arms around his neck you kiss him hard, pulling him into the spacious walk in shower.

“Then come and get your baby mama wet,” you giggle against his lips, making him laugh with the ambiguous request as he shuts the glass door behind him, his lips hungrily kissing wherever he can reach and you’re pretty sure the hot water is not the only thing that’s steaming up the glass.

Thank you for reading! Please like/reblog if you enjoyed!

#harry #styles #harry styles #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles fanfic #harry styles oneshot #harry styles one shot #harry styles fluff #harry styles x you #harry styles x y/n #harry styles x reader #dad!harry

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heliads · 2 years

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hiii, i hope you’re having a great day! are you still accepting requests? if yes, may i request a theo raeken x reader wherein the reader is liam’s older sister and he gets protective of her when he saw theo stealing glances?

i really love your works 🤍 thank you!!!!

thank YOU! theo for the win

masterlist

For better or for worse, the McCall pack is holding another meeting. The meetings are exhausting every time, a fearsome display of inside jokes that nobody understands combined with high tensions usually backed up by claws and fangs. Most gatherings are host to some form of mass argument, which may or may not tear apart a years long friendship for as long as a week or two before everyone is forced to get back in good standing with each other on pain of hunter themed death.

It’s always a good time, to say the least. Today’s meeting is held in the neutral territory of the Beacon Hills High School library, because parents of pack members were getting frustrated with how many homes came away damaged. Look, Malia only put her fist through one table. One. And she promised she’d never do it again, so that makes it better, right?

Regardless, you’re all here now, having stolen chairs from the neighboring tables to make one grand empire for all of you. Scott and Stiles drove here together, Lydia has taken it upon herself to act as chauffeur for Malia and Kira, Theo just kind of turned up out of nowhere, and you and your brother, Liam, came side by side as always.

To be honest, Liam is probably another one of the reasons you’re in the school library as well. He has a tendency to get a little hot-tempered, and the next door neighbors of whatever house is unlucky enough to be chosen for a pack meeting have grown to despise the sound of his shouts.

Not that you’d tell him this, of course. Liam is your younger brother, and even though he now has claws and fangs and you don’t, you still want to help him out. You joined the pack in the first place because you wanted to solve supernatural dilemmas; although you’d be lying if you said you always rejoice in being the only human in the pack other than Stiles, at least you’re doing something.

Right now, that something involves a heavy dose of keeping the peace. You’ve made sure the McCall pack is situated at the one table outside the view of the security cameras, just in case, but you’re still in a public setting. From the way voices keep rising just as the topic switches to full moons and supernatural creatures, you’d think you weren’t outside at all.

The issue on today’s table involves pack relations. You and your friends have long coexisted with Satomi’s pack, and barely handled Derek’s, but Scott wants to see if there are more possible allies out there. Also, it wouldn’t be all that bad if you could actually convince some of Satomi’s pacifists to learn to fight instead of relying on you guys every time. It’s hard enough to handle your own pack’s troubles, but taking on Satomi’s fights is difficult at best and nigh impossible at worst.

Around the spurts of conversation, though, you can’t help but notice something. During pack meetings, you largely stay out of the main discussion unless you’re certain you have something worthwhile to say. After all, they’re the ones who have to fight for their lives every time a hunter comes around, and they’re the ones who have to fear full moons and wolfsbane.

So why is it, then, that despite the fact that you haven’t said anything in a solid ten minutes, Theo Raeken keeps looking at you? He’s stealing glances like a shoplifter, peppering his stares in between casual conversation even though there’s nothing casual about the matter at all. You don’t know why you’re on his mind, but some part of you wants to find out.

First, though, you need to make sure that this isn’t just in your head. You wait a moment longer, keeping your gaze studiously trained on Stiles, who’s currently waxing poetic on this importance of, quote, ‘showing all those other wolf packs who’s boss.’

After you’re certain that there’s no reason anyone would be looking at you, or when Stiles’ voice reaches a crescendo, you look over at Theo. Sure enough, he’s turned your way, a faint smile playing over his lips. What’s more, he doesn’t look away when he sees you’ve noticed him. Instead, his grin broadens, and his head tilts back as if he’s proud to be discovered.

Your eyes narrow. What could it possibly mean? Although Theo has always seemed to have it out for your brother, you’re not Liam; he never had a problem with you.

In fact, the more you think about it, the more you realize that Theo’s attitude towards you couldn’t be further from how he treats Liam. Theo has always been nice to you, even after his betrayal was revealed the first time around. He’d intentionally hang around Hayden to make Liam flip, then smile at you as if nothing was the problem.

And then there’s that memory from the very beginning of it all, back before everyone had realized that Theo was working for the Dread Doctors or that he could possibly be plotting against him. Stiles warned you against Theo, of course, as did an irritable Liam, but you hadn’t listened.

You had been walking out of the school late at night, after helping out at a school function. The quest for service hours controls all students, that’s just a given. You had settled yourself down for the long walk home when a car stopped in front of you, Theo leaning out to offer you a ride. You’d hesitated once, then realized that even if he murdered you, it would at least be fun.

You can still picture that night in your head, brightly painted with the sheer thrill of a happy memory. His laugh plays in your ears like a radio track. In that moment, he hadn’t been a werewolf or a pack member or even a rival student, just a boy who seemed to like you a good deal more than he should.

The image flashes behind your eyes. White stripes glaring down the dimly lit road. His hand casually reaching over to take yours, the way neither of you pulled away. The satisfied look on his face when Theo realized that you were having just as good a time as he was.

In truth, that whole experience was probably nothing more than an exercise to see how much Theo could get you to trust him, yet it had felt like far more than that. Even though Theo Raeken is a fantastic liar, that night hasn’t felt like a falsehood. Sure, you can’t hear the differences in someone’s heartbeats like the other werewolves, nor pick up the slightest change in someone’s emotions as if their mind was yours to dissect, but still.

You know what you believe, and you believe that Theo had genuinely not been acting that night. Perhaps in the middle of all the chaos with the chimera pack, there was still a teenager inside Theo, and that teenager wanted to spend time with you.

His repeat attention now is certainly a good sign of it. Theo has nothing to gain from your friendship except your friendship, unless he’s planning yet another betrayal. At this point, however, that’s not very likely.

You’d have to tell that to Liam, though. By now, your younger brother has noticed the fact that you and Theo are trading glances like playing cards, and doesn’t like a bit of it. You can see him clenching his fists under the table, trying not to lose control, and do your best not to roll your eyes. It’s a losing battle.

Theo perceives this as well, and his smile broadens. He raises a brow to you as if to say ‘well, what can you do?’ and turns back to the conversation, the perfect picture of the perfect pack member. You may not be a werewolf, nor have a werewolf’s senses, but even you can feel the sheer outrage rolling off of Liam in waves.

The meeting ends soon enough, and you drift off to a more secluded corner of the library, intent on seeing if you can find a mythology book that might be relevant to the werewolf community at large.

As expected, Theo follows you. The sounds of your friends’ voices faintly drift by, but the tall bookshelves block out most everything else.

Theo’s grin is knowing. “How did you find the pack meeting?”

You lift a shoulder. “Wasn’t too bad, but somebody kept staring at me.”

Theo shifts closer to you. Nestled between the rows of shelves, there’s scarcely any space between the two of you. If he wanted to, Theo could do just about anything. If you wanted to, you could let him.

He opens his mouth to say something, perhaps to ask if you minded, but he’s interrupted by the sound of a furious voice.

“What the hell is this?”

You settle your forehead into your palm as Liam comes barging in. Suddenly, all traces of atmosphere are forgotten, blown away by the sheer force of Liam’s anger.

Theo still tries to maintain it, though. “We were talking,” he says placidly, “which we’d like to keep doing.”

Liam all but scowls. “Yeah, right. You’ve been staring at her during the entire meeting. I saw the whole thing.”

You sigh. “Of course you do, you have eyes. Liam, I’m not an idiot. I know what I’m doing, and I most certainly do not need you to swoop in and save me.”

Liam seems surprised. Perhaps he’s forgotten that you have a voice in this yourself. “Y/N, you know who he is. Theo is not a good person. He almost made me kill Scott, and he actually killed Scott himself.”

You can’t deny this. “Yes, and he’s also saved every one of our lives many times before. Scott’s fine with him being here, and Scott’s the one who died. What’s your problem?”

Theo’s face brightens as he listens to you defend him. By contrast, Liam looks ready to kill.

“That doesn’t mean the past goes away! What, a few months pass and now you want to hold his hand and pretend like you’re perfect together?”

Theo, sensing tension, cuts in smoothly. “I think you both have great concerns. I have killed Scott, and I’ve also done everything I can to make up for that. I’m not going to kill Y/N, though. I thought that was obvious.”

If anything, this makes Liam even more annoyed. “That’s not the problem.”

It would be great to wrap this up before the rest of the pack starts getting involved, so you do. You’ve already had a sufficient quantity of shouting matches for the day.

“Excellent. If we’re not fearing for my imminent demise, I’m going to suggest that we table this until later. I’m fine, Theo’s fine, Liam’s fine, we’re all fine. What’s not going to be fine is if we keep acting like no one else here is capable of making decisions.”

Theo looks impressed by this. “I agree.”

Liam scoffs, although he looks reluctant. “Of course you do.”

You arch a brow at your brother, and at last he nods. “Fine. Fine! I’m going. If I end up finding your dead body on a roof, though—”

He leaves his sentence hanging as he heads back into the main part of the library. You wait until Liam is firmly out of earshot, then shake your head and start to laugh.

“I’m never going to forgive him for that.”

Theo laughs as well, then leans forward once more. “You know, you didn’t answer Liam’s question.”

You frown. “What question?”

Theo spreads his hands as if the answer should be obvious. “He asked if you wanted to hold my hand now that a few months have passed. Do you?”

You answer back quickly so as to ignore the sudden heat in your cheeks. “He called you a murderer like half a dozen times, and that’s the part you remember best?”

Theo’s grin is shameless. “Of course it was. Now, do you have an answer or not? Maybe I want to know.”

He’s looking at you hopefully, so you hedge your bets and decide to tell the truth. “I think I would.”

Theo’s smile deepens. “Perfect.”

Before you know what’s happening, Theo swoops forward to kiss you. It’s a light kiss, but even though you scarcely feel it you register it throughout your entire being. So Theo does actually like you after all. You couldn’t be happier to hear it.

teen wolf tag list: @thatfangirl42, @rogueanschel, @lovesanimals0000, @rafecameronswhore, @bellabadacadabra

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flower-slut004 · 3 years

Note

If you do liam dunbar smuts could you do one it doesn't really matter what it's about.

NSFW ABC

(idk the gif isn’t working)

I didn’t have any idea or plot idea for this so I did a NSFW Abc,

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

He’s out of bed and gets a wet cloth to clean you up. After that he’s super cuddly and makes jokes as he plays with your hair.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

He loves your legs and how they wrap around his waist as he goes deep into you.

I feel like Liam is pretty cocky and likes everything about himself. It gets him hard knowing he,himself, can get you going.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

He’s definitely into cum play, he’ll rub it all over you so his scent is on you.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

He wants to be humiliated by you in public. He finds it hot knowing you’re making fun of him.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

He isn’t very experienced, he knows what he’s doing from porn. He’s learned more from you.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

Cowgirl, he loves to see your tits bounce.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

He’s extremely goofy in the first times around. He wouldn’t stop cracking jokes.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

He has some fuzz overall it’s clean.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

Liam doesn’t peg me as a romantic DURING sex. Not saying he isn’t one. He seems to just get on it while doing it.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

Liam does it every chance. He’s a very hormonal guy. He likes you watching while he’s backing off.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

Totally into impact play. He loves seeing your ass turn red when he spanks it.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

Locker room or his place.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

Liam gets jealous quickly so if he sees anyone make a comment towards you, get ready…

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

He hates chocking, he’s a afraid he’ll hurt you.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

He’ll eat you out like your pussy is water and he’s been in the desert for weeks.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

Rough (super rough) but goes painfully slow. He loves to tease you.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

He’s all for it. After or before a game, yes. Wanna sneak out of class? Yes.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

He’s willing to participate in a threesome with you *cough* with Theo *cough*

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

He can go for hours.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

he HATES them. Only he can make you cum.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

This man….this man needs to go to jail for the amount of teasing he does.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

quiet but does more growling then moaning.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

One time, you came into the locker room wearing just a cheerleader outfit. Liam smelled your arousal the minute you walked into the room. Let’s just say Coach was confused to why the lockers were on the floor.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

Good 7 inches.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

like I said earlier, he’s extremely hormonal.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

he makes sure you’re cleaned up after. Then falls asleep

#multifandom imagines #teen wolf imagine #teen wolf #teen wolf x reader #liam dunbar imagine #liam dunbar #liam dunbar x reader

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miraculouscontent · 3 years

Note

so... could you write some more adrien/chat salt? your fics and posts salting on him are always so good 🥺

Thank you! And of course~

—————

Ladybug had considered what to say multiple times over the day she'd had to think about it. She'd thought about all the different ways she could've said it, and what would've been the most effective when who she was talking to was taken into account.

However, sitting there on the rooftops with Chat Noir, there was a point where she just had to say it, no matter how it came out.

"Give me your miraculous."

Chat jerked his head over to her, jarred from the silence and eyes wide as his brain seemed to process the statement. Ladybug, meanwhile, stared ahead at the night sky, as if she hadn't said anything out of the ordinary.

After a few more seconds, she got a reply in the form of laughter, Chat buckling over with a hand on his stomach. "That's quite the Hawk Moth impression, Bugaboo!" he exclaimed, though calming himself enough to give her a half-lidded gaze and add, "But you don't have to do that to impress me, you know."

She didn't reply, only turning to look at him with her expression entirely flat, not showing any reaction to the mixture of teasing and flirting.

He was still grinning for a while, but as the silence dragged on, he began to falter. "...Ah—" He shook his head, leaning towards her and trying to force a smirk. "—if you want a wish that badly, all you need to do is say the word, m'lady! I can grant all your wishes."

She remained stoic, maintaining eye contact with him but not encouraging his banter. She could practically hear the gears turning in his head as it became clear to him that she was very much not joking.

One of Chat's ears twitched in confusion. He leaned back to his normal distance from her, seeming at a loss for what to say now that the atmosphere was finally registering with him.

Ladybug took a breath, noting that she had his attention. She straightened and looked back over Paris, saying, "I can't do this anymore."

He followed her gaze, squinting as if the answer would be written out there in bold letters for him. "Being a hero?"

"No, us. Us being partners." While he gaped at her, she stared down at her lap, her hands clutching her thighs as if that would give her some sense of stability. "...Chat, do you think this is a game?"

Chat shifted and rubbed the back of his neck, clearly not having expected the conversation to go here. It was hard to tell whether he was trying to keep things light or if it was just his genuine reply when he responded, "W-well, I'm definitely in it to win if that's what you mean—"

"I talked to Xavier Ramier today."

She watched his expression carefully, his hand leaving his neck and hovering awkwardly in the air as he looked at her. He seemed puzzled, not knowing what this had to do with the conversation, though his brows rose briefly like he'd remembered something.

She continued, trying not to show too much in her reaction as she explained, "Since I'm not as busy right now, I thought I'd check in on some of the people who got akumatized but I didn't have time for earlier. He was one of them." Idly, she pulled out her yoyo, almost mindlessly tapping away at it as she navigated through the various menus. "He said you came by to check on him a while ago; said that you were sitting there, just enjoying the day with him. He told me that you asked him if he missed being Mister Pigeon, or if he was feeling any negative emotions."

"I—" Chat tried to interject.

She didn't hear him, too focused on telling the story. "Then I asked him when you showed up, and he didn't know exactly when, but..." She showed him her yoyo, the messages Chat had sent clearly being timestamped for reference. "I figured out from what his rough guess and asking around that it was when you were supposed to be on patrol."

"I was on patrol!" Chat protested. "I was just checking up on him."

"You were relaxing on a bench," Ladybug reminded him., her tone remaining consistently flat. Snapping her yoyo shut and returning it to her hip, she added, "I even asked around and people told me they saw you go into the Grand Paris Hotel. I heard from one of the butlers there that you were sulking, and got excited when you saw Chloe and Sabrina fighting."

He opened his mouth to explain himself, but she could tell that he was struggling to come up with an excuse; he honestly believed that she'd never find out about any of this.

"I trusted you, Chat. I trusted you to cover for me when I'm not there, no matter what." She needed to swallow back her emotions for that one. "Why would you do that? Why would you hope for akuma to happen? Why would you lie to me?"

"I didn't!" Chat insisted, waving his arms frantically. "I—see... it was an off day! I was just—you know I can always do my best around you, and I did patrol! I just... made a few stops along the way! I wouldn't lie to you!"

"So you don't lie to me," she stated cautiously, "and you've never lied against me."

"Of course not!" he assured.

She paused for effect, just long enough for him to grow uneasy, then said, "Theo Barbot waved me down a while back."

Chat visibly cringed, and she could hear a hissing sound as he sucked in a breath.

"He wanted to congratulate me. He saw the picture of us kissing on the Ladyblog and said that he was glad we could finally go public about our relationship." Her gaze sharpened even as she stared at nothing in particular. "I asked what he meant, and he told me that you said that we were a thing. He said that that's what got him akumatized."

"It wasn't..." He averted his gaze. "...a lie exactly."

In response, Ladybug stood, throwing her arms outwards as emotion began to seep into her voice. "This is about more than lies, Chat; it's about everything! If you can only do your best around me, then what happens if an akuma gets me?" She didn't need him to answer. "You'll lose it. I need someone who I know will take care of things even if I'm captured."

"I would!" Chat retorted he stood up, the nervousness now showing on his face. "I would do everything to get you back, I—"

"Party Crasher," she cut in without missing a beat.

He recoiled like she'd physically struck him.

"And it's not just that I can't rely on you if I'm taken out; I can't rely on you not to take yourself out," she said pointedly, turning away from him and taking a few steps away to distance herself. "You're always throwing yourself in front of me and sacrificing yourself, sometimes when you don't even have to and always without just talking to me about it! Do you have any idea how that feels? You tell me all the time that you'll listen to me and how I'm the planner here, and then you go and make plans without me."

She heard Chat's hurried footsteps from behind her as he tried to match her pace and argue, "It's not like that! It's just—it's because..."

She turned just as he reached her, her stern gaze making him stop. "Because my anger is so irresistible?" she asked. "I'm just so adorable when I'm mad that you won't listen to me?" She advanced on him, forcing him back. "Thanks, Chat, that makes me feel so much better that you can't take me seriously because you just love me that much," she said sarcastically.

"That's not what I meant!" he argued, though at that point it seemed like all he could do was weakly protest that he didn't mean anything that way. "I'm only teasing, Bugaboo!"

"Then what do you really mean?" She clenched her fists at her side. "I've told you to stop calling me Bugaboo and you never do! You're too busy bantering and talking about our relationship to focus on the fight, and when that kiss happened - the one that happened because you got shot by Oblivio and I had to save you - you laughed at me for being upset and you didn't care. I'm tired of having to deal with all of that; I'm dealing with enough as guardian!" Reminded of her own status, she steeled herself up and held a hand out to him, managing to calm down enough to say, "Now, revoke your miraculous. I'll give it to someone else."

Chat retreated, his hand moving to cover his ring protectively. The nervousness had partially faded away into him being generally upset, though he also didn't try to defend his actions anymore. "You... if you give the ring to someone else, you'll know their identity!"

"I've already got a plan for that," Ladybug stated, holding her hand out more insistently.

Because of course she did. She wouldn't have been doing any of this if she hadn't given it a lot of thought first. There were pros and cons to bringing in a new cat, and when she really weighed it all together, this was the only way forward. Chat wouldn't learn, and she'd been stuck in a limbo of shouting at him, being ignored, and having to push down her feelings in the future or risk damaging their teamwork. She'd devalued herself - devalued her emotions - in order to believe that she could make it work because she needed him.

Except, she didn't. She needed a cat; someone to use the more active miraculous to balance out the lack of firepower that the ladybug miraculous had. It wasn't that it could be just anyone, but it certainly didn't have to be Chat. While she deeply regretted going back on one of Master Fu's decisions when he couldn't even have a say in it anymore, the fact of the matter was that she was the guardian and she made the rules.

Chat backed away a few more steps, his eyes darting around as he sought a way out of the situation. Then, facing Ladybug, a mixture of upset and offended, he argued, "We're a team! We still come out fine no matter what happened! You don't even know my identity, I've kept it a secret just like you wanted!"

He was reaching, and they both knew it. That had always been the reason for revoking someone's miraculous: someone else knowing their identity. However, there were reasons beyond that, and them "coming out fine" from a battle was hardly a high bar for someone getting to keep theirs. Ladybug knew that well enough after having dealt with Miracle Queen; even if Chloe's identity hadn't been revealed, she was still a bad person who felt entitled to a miraculous.

But Ladybug also understood the game Chat was playing at: that it wouldn't be right to take his miraculous when he's protected his identity. The logic was flawed, but she nonetheless crossed her arms and gave him a blank look, staring into his green cat eyes and starting to fit pieces of a metaphorical puzzle together.

Kung Food, Horrificator, and Startrain: those at minimum were times where Chat's civilian form had to have been inside at the time the akuma happened. Chat had also mistaken Francoise Dupont for an elementary school after they'd defeated Kwamibuster, but she mentally acknowledged that he could've been lying. He had to have been, if they were trapped in that building together with Horrificator. It narrowed things down significantly, and she knew that he had to have been a teenager like her due to the timer on his miraculous.

And while she was aware that Chat's green eyes meant nothing considering that she got green eyes as Lady Noire, there were little coincidences sprinkled throughout their history together that didn't add up unless she came to one final conclusion.

Chat showing up at the museum even though he'd have no way of knowing that an akuma could've been there. Chat knowing that Volpina's illusion was fake. Chat's mysterious loss of his miraculous when Style Queen was attacking.

The feather allergy.

Then, Ladybug glanced at the hand he was covering; the one she knew had the cat miraculous on his right ring finger. She almost felt like congratulating herself for constantly resisting the temptation, because when she actually thought about it, it was so obvious.

She knew that hand, as she'd seen it so many times. She had pictures of it plastered all over her wall and the realization made her feel sick, her heart dropping as opposed to skipping a beat.

"...Adrien Agreste," she said finally. "You're Adrien Agreste."

He blinked, his expression blank at first before dread started to take its place. His mouth slowly fell open, words trying to escape but there weren't any to be found.

She let the moment drag, stepping forward to close the distance between them. Adrien's face flashed over Chat Noir's for a moment and she swallowed, summoning all of her confidence to address him properly.

"Tell me, Adrien. Tell me that this hasn't been a game for you. Tell me that you wanted to protect Paris all this time. Tell me that this hasn't all been about you."

She waited, not expecting or hoping for any answer in particular, because it no longer mattered; the conclusion would the same regardless.

Ultimately, she got no reply, and within the next ten minutes, the cat miraculous was in her hands and Adrien was promptly taken home.

—————

Marinette took a breath of the cool night air, having chosen to walk home rather than get there as Ladybug. She needed time to think, and walking helped her clear her head from the rush of everything that'd happened.

Her purse rustled, Tikki popping out and leaning off the side to look up at her. "Is everything okay, Marinette?"

"Yeah." She nodded her head, just to reassure Tikki further. "It was for the best. It's a lot, but... I wanted to do it; for me, and for Paris."

Regardless of how many emotions she had to deal with, she was glad she knew. She supposed that she could've taken Chat's miraculous without seeing his identity - though it would've been complicated - but it helped her sort through so many thoughts in her mind.

She let out half of a chuckle, idly thinking that she dodged a bullet. If dating Adrien would've turned him into any level of Chat Noir - or, honestly, just knowing that he was Chat Noir - then it was definitely for the best that she figured out his identity. She wasn't sure how she'd behave around him the following days, but just the idea of things being any semblance of "normal" in the face of "the famous model Adrien Agreste," with no stutters or freak-outs...

It was nice, making everything feel a little brighter. Maybe Alya would even stop claiming that she's just "jealous" of Lila, the girls would stop teasing her so much, and she could put all that time she used to spend thinking about Adrien into something more productive. There hadn't seemed to be a downside in sight, actually.

As Marinette kept thinking on the subject, her gaze wandered off to the side, taking in the sights around her, and she paused when she noticed that she was right next to the Seine. The revelation didn't surprise her - she knew she'd have to pass by it to get home - but it did inevitably remind her of Luka, especially since they'd broken up only a day ago.

The metaphorical wound was still fresh, not helped by the fact that Lies had come right afterward as if to remind her of why she had to break up with him; she couldn't have a normal life, and she certainly couldn't have a boyfriend. It didn't matter if she loved Luka and he loved her back, because she would always have to leave their dates at the first sign of an akuma.

Yet, nevertheless, there was some form of comfort in staring out at the river, and she found herself traveling down the nearest set of stairs to walk right next to the Seine instead of so far above it, her eyes trailing along the surface of the water to search for the Liberty.

It took a few minutes of walking, almost making her wonder if she'd passed it without realizing, but then she saw the ship resting in the water, right where it always was. She approached, taking in the various colors and the silly rainbow weathervane, her body automatically relaxing at the memories of those two weeks of crafting kittycorn-themed costumes from paper mache.

Curiously, she noticed that the gangplank was up, as someone presumably had forgotten to pull it back before going to bed that night. Marinette walked over, crouching down and wondering idly if it was possible that it had been put up but had just fallen over at some point, yet it was clearly set perfectly in place.

Mentally trashing the thought, she placed her hands on her knees and started getting up. As she straightened her back, her eyes involuntarily scanned over the deck of the ship, a familiar color palette of blues, blacks, and whites registering in her mind before she fully recognized what—who it was. Her eyes locked onto the figure, and she had to slap a hand over her mouth to prevent herself from letting out a yelp.

It was Luka, sitting down on an instrument case with his guitar in his lap, though Marinette noted after a moment that he was actually asleep. Concern furrowed her brows as she took in his posture, one of his arms resting on the case while the other was perched on the guitar's base. His back was arched against the taffrail of the ship and his head was tilted back to the point where his hair was falling into his face.

There was no way that was comfortable.

Marinette hesitated, feeling almost like she was trespassing, then gave Tikki a look to hide inside the purse while she walked across the gangplank Any footsteps against the deck of the ship seemed unusually loud due to the otherwise quiet night, but Marinette tried to ignore it, approaching Luka cautiously so as not to startle him.

He was frowning, and she involuntarily copied the expression onto her own face. Outside of the bumps in their dates and the break-up itself, it was rare to see him as anything but calm or happy, and she got the distinct feeling that it wasn't just because he was asleep that he was making that face.

She reached up, lightly fixing his hair in case to try and keep it out of his eyes when he woke up, then lowered her hand to his shoulder. She gave him a light shake, then another with a little more effort when the first failed to stir him. When that failed as well, she leaned close, looking side to side like she was afraid someone would see her and think she was doing something strange. However, no one else was around, allowing her to safely whisper his name to him.

"Luka."

She stiffened when she got an immediate response to that, Luka letting out a low humming noise as he shifted. She jolted back, trying to give him space and blushing at the thought that shaking hadn't woken him in the slightest but her voice had immediately.

Luka's eyes opened halfway, staring blankly up at the sky. Brows lowering in confusion, he tried to move, though a whine escaped him when his body protested at the uncomfortable position he'd gotten himself into. He winced, but eased forward and leaned on his guitar for support, only then looking forward and meeting her gaze.

She shifted in place, feeling awkward but knowing that it was too late to back out now.

"...Mmmarinette?" he asked, squinting like he wasn't really sure she was there. He blinked a few times, his eyes widening a fraction when he confirmed that she was real. "Marinette?"

"Ah—hi," she replied, waving awkwardly. "Um, sorry, it was just—I was walking, and I saw you, and you were sleeping weird—not that you sleeping is weird or you look weird when you sleep!—but you seemed really uncomfortable so I just..." She gestured vaguely at his current state of awareness.

He let out a tired sound that may've been an "oh," then ran his fingers into his hair and rustled it, like he was attempting to shake the tiredness out of himself. That done, he managed a small smile at her that didn't stretch anywhere near the amount it usually would. "Thank you. I'm glad you care about me that much."

"Of course I do!" she blurted out, a little offended at the idea that she wouldn't. She realized belatedly how loud she'd been and rubbed an arm in embarrassment, but didn't take anything back either.

Deep down, she knew where he was coming from. It must've been hard for him to watch her ditch him and then deal with her ending their relationship with next to no explanation. Even with the confidence he constantly radiated, not having any information on the 'how's or 'why's must've been difficult, and she hated keeping secrets from him.

Even Chat got better than that...

Luka tilted his head at her, the anxiety probably written all across her face. Concerned, he began to ask, "...Is everything—"

"Luka," she called suddenly, straightening to face him fully. "I—" She swallowed, needing a few seconds to compose herself. "I know this is a bad time, because I'm not really supposed to be here, and you can say 'no,' but... can we talk? About what happened?"

She bit her lip nervously as he sat up, his body noticeably more awake than before. She felt like he deserved to know more about the whole situation, but he also had every right to refuse her for waiting - even if it wasn't that long ago - so the possibilities were nerve-wracking.

Thankfully though, Luka relaxed after a moment, lifting his guitar out of his lap to set it aside, the bottom of the body resting on the deck of the Liberty while the neck was supported by the taffrail. Settling his hands in his lap, he then gave her his full attention, even offering a soft look of reassurance.

Her shoulders eased; he was going to hear her out. Part of her almost felt bad, wondering if maybe he was forcing himself, but she also knew it was important for him to get closure on the matter.

"Okay..." She breathed, acknowledging to herself that she hadn't planned this is the slightest. After some internal debate, she sat down on the deck of the Liberty in lieu of a proper seat, earning a look from Luka but no further comment otherwise. Running her hands along her capris, she stared up at him and finally began, "It—it wasn't you."

He raised a brow, silently encouraging her to go on.

"I mean, maybe you weren't worried about that, but I just... I needed you to know that." She shrugged half-heartedly. "You didn't do anything wrong, Luka - you're amazing - and if it wasn't for me always having to leave and rush off and make you feel bad, I would've stayed with you."

"...Really?"

She blinked at his tone, the corners of her lips quirking up as he covered his mouth, clearly not having intended to blurt that out. She simply nodded at him, falling back into her serious state as she continued, "You deserve someone who can be dedicated to you, and I just—I can't, and I can't tell you why either." She slumped, ashamed at the secret she was forced to keep. "I wish I could. I do trust you, but it's not about that. It's—" She pursed her lips, struggling to find the right words. "—it's not really something I can say?"

She dropped her gaze to her lap, but didn't miss the flicker of understanding in his eyes. It was important to her, for him to know that she believed in him and that he'd done everything right in their relationship.

"...Are—" Luka paused, voice laced with worry. "Marinette, are you being blackmailed or something?"

She almost laughed at that. His deduction wasn't entirely wrong, as "go defend Paris from a supervillain and tell no one about it, and if you do then they might be in danger," certainly did sound like blackmail. Still, she shook her head, reassuring, "It's nothing like that. I'm sorry. I really want to tell you, a-and even be with you, but I can't do either." She clutched at her knees in an attempt to ground herself, glancing back up at him with a mixture of sorrow and guilt. "I don't know what you see in me, Luka, but I feel so lucky that you like me so much, and then unlucky because—" She choked briefly, her cheeks heating up as she realized that she'd never said the exact words to him before. "—because I like you too and I want it to be that simple but it's not. You want the truth and the truth is that I can't tell you no matter how much I want to. I know I forget things and had to skip out on dates because I was so stressed out, but you made everything fun and not stressful and I loved every date we went on until... you know." She gestured wildly to imply 'unsaid things happening.'

He was quiet, not showing any particular reaction, though she'd spent enough time with him to know that he was glad that she was talking more openly about it and clearing some things up that he might've been wondering about. His expression seemed blank on the surface but he was relieved to know something even if her words were pulling his emotions in every direction.

Mentally preparing herself for the next step, Marinette pushed herself up and walked over to him, finding it hard to meet Luka's gaze even as she hunched over and boldly placed her hands on top of his. Out of the corner of her vision, she could see his eyes searching her face, not knowing what to expect next.

"...I'm sorry," she murmured. "I know I apologized already but I'm sorry. I should've known things would end up like this but I wanted to date you anyway. I can't even tell you when this is all going to end so I can't ask you to wait for me either because it's not fair. You deserve a relationship that isn't so complicated... that doesn't involve me."

She flinched at the emotional punch to the gut she'd just given herself. She'd already known that dating would be near-impossible so long as she was Ladybug, but it was a completely different feeling to face Luka and say it to his face. She wasn't sure if she'd been his first crush, but the thought left a bitter taste in her mouth that it'd all gone so wrong and there was no hope of getting it back.

She took another breath to calm herself, slowly raising her hands away from his. "Anyway, that's all I wanted to say," she murmured, still not making eye contact with him. "Thanks for trying to show me a good time, Luka, but... maybe you should fall in love with someone else."

She turned away before her emotions could get the better of her, about to walk off when a hand suddenly grabbed her wrist and jerked her back. She squeaked in surprise, glancing behind her to see that Luka was on the edge of the instrument case, arm stretched out like he'd impulsively hurried to stop her. She opened her mouth to ask what he was doing, but he spoke first.

"Why?"

"W...why?" she echoed.

"Why should I fall for someone else?" he asked, his tone somewhere between hurt and serious.

"Ah." She tilted her head, confused and with no idea of what he was getting at. "Because of everything I said?"

"That you enjoyed our dates? That it wasn't us who cut the song short?" His other hand reached up, holding her hand as well while he looked at her tenderly. His voice grew quiet, like he couldn't believe what he was saying. "That you like me?"

Marinette blushed, but found it hard to look away from him this time. "I...I do like you. Um—only you, but—Luka, the dates..."

Luka slowly stood up, gently squeezing her hand in a show of support. "I didn't even think that I'd be taking up too much of your time, Marinette. I wanted to be together with you, but I didn't want it to be hard either." He offered her a lopsided smile, adding, "And I'm glad you told me, because I don't think you being busy means we can't be together."

"...What?" Marinette gaped at him in disbelief. "I thought you said that you wanted the truth, and—"

"You gave it to me," he reminded her. "You said you can't tell me and I believe you."

She waved her free hand wildly. "Y-yeah, and I'll have to run off and we'll never know when!"

"Then we don't have to date, or we don't have to date as much." He'd said it like it was the simplest thing in the world, and maybe it was. "Why should we be playing sad solos when we can play a happy duet instead?"

She went to retort, but he'd so swiftly shot down her arguments that she was left speechless. She hadn't even considered that - trying to compromise with him on their dates - because she thought she wouldn't be worth it for him, yet here he was, offering himself to her again now that everything had been laid out for him. It seemed too good to be true, but...

He was her Second Chance, and every moment she spent with him just reaffirmed why she'd adored being given that chance in the first place.

She made a small noise as she tried to hold back emotion, her hand shaking in his. "You want me that much?"

His smile grew wider and more genuine, clearly recognizing that she was about to accept him. "Yeah. Do you want me too?"

Afraid her voice might crack and ruin the moment, she nodded and turned fully towards him. She held out her other hand for him and he took it happily, both of them able to enjoy each other's company once more.

Once things had properly settled down, she held back a shy giggle and asked, "S-so, do we just... pick up where we left off? Or just—before everything started going wrong?"

He hummed, seeming to honestly think about it. "I guess so. What verse do you want to start from?"

She retraced all of the bad dates in her mind, like she were rewinding a movie. One moment in particular stuck out to her, and she tried not to grin too much as she suggested, "The cinema? After I gave you the necklace?"

She didn't have to clarify any further, his eyes lighting up in remembrance. He grinned and leaned down to be closer to her level, her getting up on her tiptoes to meet him halfway in a kiss, thus finishing what they'd started from what felt like forever ago. She could feel Luka's hands caressing hers, as if to reassure that everything was alright and he was happy.

She waited until the kiss broke apart, then looked at him to ask teasingly, "Better than setting up a whole date to do that?"

He pressed his forehead to hers, sighing happily. "Definitely."

She beamed at him, almost tempted to kiss him again before she remembered what time it was. She gasped, inadvertently surprising him with the sound, then recoiled and placed her hands firmly on his shoulders, sitting him back down on the instrument case.

"You need to sleep!" she told him, then corrected a second later, "But—not here! Not right here anyway! It needs to be in a bed! Your bed!"

He laughed at the abrupt shift in tone, but nodded obediently at her, resting his fingers along her wrists. "I will. You'll sleep too, right?"

She nodded back, her heart skipping a beat at his care for her. "Yeah, I promise."

Her hands lingered on him, as did his with her as she pulled away from him. As much as she would've liked to stay with him, it was late and she still had a lot to take care of.

Rushing across the gangplank, she waited until she was safely on the other side so she wouldn't risk tripping as she turned to face him, walking backward and waving excitedly. "Bye, Luka!"

He suppressed a chuckle at the happiness-induced loudness of her voice, then waved back at her. It was only when he got up to take his guitar inside that she finally turned around and started officially heading home.

—————

When the last of the Adrien photos had been shoved into her trash bin - even the ones on her corkboard - Marinette allowed herself to breathe a sigh of relief and collapse into her chair. It'd taken a little longer than she'd thought, but she was still satisfied with the change. The walk home and conversation with Luka had brought all of her thoughts together and made her feel optimistic about how the day had gone.

"Marinette?" Tikki looked up from the chocolate chip she'd been nibbling on, her being the only kwami awake at that hour. Voicing the inevitable, she asked, "What are you going to do about the cat miraculous?"

Marinette turned, acknowledging her, then reached into her purse to pull out the ring in question, turning it a few times in her hands. It was weird having it in her possession while she still had the ladybug earrings on, but it wouldn't stick around for long anyway, so she wasn't concerned.

Tikki continued, an urgency in her voice, "You're Ladybug, and you're not supposed to know anyone's identities, but you're also the guardian now, so you're supposed to give out miraculouses and know everyone's identities!"

Marinette, much to Tikki's apparent surprise, flashed her a smile and held the ring up confidently. "That's exactly why you're going to pick the next cat, Tikki."

Tikki blanked, dropping the chocolate chip in shock. "Wh—me?" Her voice squeaked. "Why me?"

Marinette would be lying if she said that she didn't find some amusement in Tikki's befuddlement. With a bit of effort, she pushed herself up from her seat, setting the ring down on the table and walking towards the sink at the other side of the room. "Because you've been with every ladybug who's ever existed, which means that you've known every ladybug and cat duo that's ever existed." Giving Tikki an expectant look, she added, "If anyone knows what kind of cat I'd need as a partner, it's you."

"But—" Tikki floundered, the thought clearly having never occurred to her. "It's the guardian who has to hand out miraculouses!"

"I won't know the new cat's identity this way," Marinette reminded her, idly tracing her fingertips along the sink's edge. "Sure, it'll be someone we both know, but if I didn't figure out that Adrien is Chat Noir until I tried, then I won't figure out this one either."

Her eyes scanned over the various drawers in her reach and she pulled open one in particular, a small box jerking forward from the momentum. It was the same box that held her ladybug earrings all those months ago, and now it would be the box for the new cat as well.

Holding the box to her chest and silently wishing luck upon it, Marinette returned to her table to see Tikki staring quietly at the ring in thought, apparently still processing what she'd been told. Marinette paid her no mind for the moment, setting the box down and searching various other drawers for a white cloth big enough for the box to be wrapped in. Then, once she'd successfully found one, she laid it out neatly on the table and opened the box to place the ring inside.

The moving of the ring snapped Tikki out of whatever trance she'd been in. She flew up, clinging to Marinette's hand and begging, "Wait! At least tell me what you'd want in a cat!"

Marinette supposed that was a win, since Tikki wasn't outright rejecting the idea and had little argument against it. She dropped the ring inside the box and smiled at the gentle 'click' it made when she closed it, then turned to address Tikki. The nervousness on display made a modicum of sense when considering that kwami were supposed to obey the guardian, so being told to do what they wanted was probably a little strange.

Marinette just took it in stride. She leaned against her chair as she considered her ideal cat, having been so used to Chat Noir that she needed a minute to imagine someone who really matched her.

"Thoughtful," she answered, nearly blurting the word out when it finally came to her. "Someone who thinks the way I do so I'm not doing everything myself. They can be selfless, but they have to have limits, and with good instincts so they won't throw themselves in front of me." Her expression growing fond at the idea of such a partner, she took the cloth and wrapped the box in it, sealing it with a strong knot as she added, "And... they have to be understanding, where I can cover for them and they can cover for me and we'll just—click."

She snapped her fingers for effect, watching as Tikki flew over to the wrapped-up box and tested it to ensure it was safe to carry. While she was tugging at the knot to confirm it was tight enough, Marinette stood and headed up the stairs to her bed, opening the way to her balcony so Tikki had a way out.

By the time Marinette peeked over the bed to check on Tikki, Tikki had already taken hold of the cloth and flew up to be eye level with her, the box being a noticeable yet manageable weight. Marinette moved to the side, allowing the straight-faced Tikki to go past her and go up to the balcony.

Thinking that Tikki had already gone, Marinette was about to close the trapdoor when she heard a soft, "Marinette?"

Her head turned to see Tikki, hovering above the little table with the box still held in her paws. She seemed conflicted, like she was struggling to find words, but eventually settled on, "You're a great guardian."

And with that, she left, Marinette blinking in surprise for a moment before a smile formed on her face. She closed the way to her balcony, then slipped back down the stairs to start getting ready for bed.

At the same time she'd be settling in to sleep that night, her tiny Miracle Box would be set down delicately in the Liberty, specifically on Luka Couffaine’s amp.

#((And some Lukanette obviously because I have no self control.))#MC's Writing #writing: story #category: salt #salt: chat noir #episode: Lies #other: ml spoilers #relationship: Luka Couffaine & Marinette Dupain Cheng

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