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#damn feelings
justanormalfangirlx2 · 8 months
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vent
this happened irl
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justchillaine · 2 years
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how to stick to loving fictional characters ?
...
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captainsaltypear · 2 months
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IS ANYONE ELSE GONNA TALK ABOUT THIS OR
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marzipanandminutiae · 2 years
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“you don’t like the proliferation of terms like Unalive outside of TikTok because you realize that you’re aging out of youth culture and it makes you uncomfortable!”
no I don’t like it because there’s something INCREDIBLY dystopian about being forced to soften terms for basic parts of the human experience like death and sex (and even more so terms for oppressed minorities- call me a “le-dollar sign-bian” and I will bite you) purely because advertisers and corporations demand it
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inkskinned · 8 months
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you're in the habit of denying yourself things.
if someone asked you directly, you would say that you love a little treat. you like iced coffee and getting the cookie. you drink juice out of a fancy cup sometimes, and often do use your candles until they gutter out helplessly.
but you hesitate about buying the 20 dollar hand mixer because, like. you could just use your arms. you weren't raised rich. you don't get to just spend the 20 dollars (remember when that could cover lunch?), at least - you don't spend that without agonizing over it first, trying to figure out the cost-benefits like you are defending yourself in front of a jury. yes, this rice cooker could seriously help you. but you do know how to make stovetop rice and it really isn't that hard. how many pies or brownies would you actually make, in order to make that hand mixer worthwhile?
what's wild is that if the money was for a friend, it would already be spent. you'd fork over 40 without blinking an eye, just to make them happy. the difference is that it's for you, so you need to justify it.
and it sneaks in. you ration yourself without meaning to - you don't finish the pint of ice cream, even though you want to. the next time you go to the store, you say ah, i really shouldn't, and then you walk away. you save little bits of your precious things - just in case. sometimes you even go so far as putting that one thing in your shopping cart. and then just leaving it there, because maybe-one-day, but not right now, there's other stuff going on.
you do self-care, of course. but you don't do it more than like, 3 days in a row. after that it just feels a little bit over-the-edge. like. you can't live in decadence, the economy is so bad right now, kid.
so you don't buy the rice cooker. you can-and-will spend the time over the stove. you can withstand the little sorrows. denial and discipline are practically synonyms. and you're not spoiled.
it's just - it's not always a rice cooker. sometimes it is a person or a job or a hug. sometimes it is asking for help. sometimes it is the summer and your college degree. sometimes it is looking down at scabbed knees and feeling a strange kind of falling, like you can't even recognize the girl you used to be. sometimes it is your handprint looking unsteady.
sometimes it is tuesday, and you didn't get fired, and you want to celebrate. but what is it you like, even? you search around your little heart and come up empty. you're so used to denying that all your desires draw a blank.
oh fuck. see, this is the perfect opportunity. if you had a mixer, you'd make a cake.
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beybuniki · 2 months
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best friend with social anxiety
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Me: “They’re making a new Garfield movie huh? Meh, I don’t know if that’s going to interest me in any particular way-“
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zmeess · 1 year
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reading books together all night long
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vi-visected · 1 year
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my therapist: how are you feeling in the wake of your (autism spectrum disorder) diagnosis?
me: well it makes sense doesn’t it? i was the one who requested testing. like on some level i kind of figured.
my therapist: yes, i’m personally glad we pursued it because it helps me better understand parts of your behavior and how to accommodate you. but how do you feel about it? you said before that you were in heavy denial about the possibility when you were younger.
me: well yeah, i had a preconceived idea of what autism was that i know now wasn’t true. but at the time it was distressing and i didn’t want to think about it too hard.
my therapist: how was it different then? what was your idea of autism then?
me: it was, you know, severe developmental delay. i never thought i had developed abnormally at all, so to try and match up the severity i associated with autism and the way i viewed myself, i just couldn’t.
my therapist: but you did.
me: sorry?
my therapist: you did develop abnormally. both socially and academically.
me: socially yes, but i had no problems with academics. i always especially excelled at reading comprehension, more so than anyone else in my grade. i started lagging in high school but i think that was a lot of burnout and depression and ptsd, probably. i was incredibly smart. hell, i spoke in full sentences earlier than most of my peers.
my therapist: violette, that’s still abnormal development.
me: …huh?
my therapist: developing abnormally fast is still developing abnormally.
me:
me: oh.
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carnivalcarrion · 7 months
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some misc Barn & Wally doodles from the past week or so <3 i heart them
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I keep forgetting how funny the whole "did you just smell me" scene is until I watch it again. Its dead fucking silent and Hannibal comes up behind Will, looks him up and down, and slowly and hesitantly leans in to smell him like he's a glass of fine wine. And then he looks away all awkward when he's caught. Like bro what did you expect to happen???
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justchillaine · 9 months
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Goin back to my (fictional) bois after a week of heartache be like
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podcastfaggot · 17 days
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the tma fandom really is just full of some of the kinkiest asexuals you’ll ever meet huh
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ryllen · 1 month
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and some extra unused stuff while they are in affectionate mood
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bruciemilf · 2 months
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if I had any kind of artistic prowess, I’d draw Clark with a mild ‘I’m about to wreck shop’ smile, grabbing at his hair, glasses halfway down his nose while helping Jon and Damian with their math homework.
“Pa, they want us to do it THIS way-“
“BUDDY. MATH IS M A T H.”
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dxndeli-n · 5 months
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Abandonment issues go brrr
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