#decided to do some writing tonight

[catty-words]

i rarely get quite so personal on here but. last tuesday my partner of a decade and i decided to take a break - not even in some big heartbreaking way, we’ve just been together the entirety of our adult lives and it felt like a good idea for both of us to explore if the relationship is still serving us - and i moved out of my house AND am technically single for the first time in a long-ass time and i feel silly making this confessional about fandom but what if i don’t post a chapter of bitty spark today? it’s written, but i am in the weirdest, most vacant headspace and i won’t be able to enjoy it if i post??

#also. one of the most recent comments i got on it was a list of things the reader wanted me to be doing. not exactly a list of demands #but it still kinda hit like one #anyway. maybe no chapter tonight i still haven’t decided. #but i have been trying to write the last four days and it’s been miserable and i want my headspace back #might have to write some truly terrible poetry to reclaim it #bitty spark ‘verse

[archangeldyke-all]

sorry for no requests tonight, i'll be back to 'em tomorrow!

#spent my writing time tonight working on the sex ed fic #it's so fun to write heheheh i'm very excited for u guys to read it. #there's like 1 or 2 chapters left depending on how i decide to space it out and hopefully it'll be on ao3 by the weekend! #anyways #love u guys! i've got some LOVELY requests i'm excited to get to tomorrow :) hope ur all doing well <333

[violetsareblue-selfships]

good morning!! <3

#woo #more of the same #i /am/ getting closer #i think i'm on the second to last section in terms of the quests #no i just checked - i'm on the third to last lol (the tell-tale heart one :3) #but anyway progress is still progress #then tonight... #would love to write or at least come up with a tag for raf :3 #but that all depends on how nice my brain is to me #otherwise i might do some of those 'about your selfship' templates i keep seeing going around ^^ #they sound fun #but anyways #i hope today/tonight's a good one #and that you enjoy the eclipse if you decide to watch it/can watch it #morning rambles

[bigothteddies]

something that just eats away at my fucking soul is when my politeness gets in the way with people. Like I’m sorry, but I’m going to treat like a fucking human being until you give me permission to act otherwise??? I’m going to be respectful until you communicate that you’re okay with me acting otherwise??? Like god you piss me off and make me want to beat you into submission until you swear you won’t talk to anyone else again, you make my blood boil and make me so jealous my stomach turns to think of anyone else even touching you. I want to hurt you and keep you and fuck you and ruin you and control you and a thousand other toxic fucked up things. But I’m not going to say that. I’m not going to hint at that. I’m going to give you fucking respect until you tell me it’s okay to feel and act like that.

#unimportant thoughts #I don’t care if you dont want me to be like that #but to be written off as ‘nice’ #when im SO the opposite of that #makes me want to scream and beat someone up #im not fucking nice #im just doing my job as a normal human being and respecting you. #im not. fucking nice. #dont you dare write me off as some shy boy too nervous and caring to do shit #i will beat you into a pulp and make you tell ne you love me to get me to stop #i will rip off your clothes and dress you how i please #i will decide if i get to use your holes tonight or not #but im not going to do anything without permission #because im not a fucking monster #and dont confuse my humanity #with normalcy. #because god will that ever piss me off even more

[skelavender]

fitp updates might have to move to saturdays due to the horrors (full time job)

#haven’t decided yet idk #i know todays chap needs some editing so it will likely be late tonight / early tomorrow unless i do it on my lunch break #sorryyyyyy #fitp bts #on writing #.txt

[harleyification]

Hey look, I finally got to write some Moon Son!!! I’ve been heavily inspired by Lollipencil to start seriously writing for this AU, and so I decided to start at the beginning…how I think it all began. However, heed the tags, because this starts really dark. This idea has been traveling around in my brain for several months now, a culmination of A. Letting Marc and the others become a fist of Khonshu early, B. Their mother being shitty and abusive like in the show, and C. The comics interpretation of Marc possibly getting DID due to almost getting killed multiple times in his life.

WARNINGS: Graphic Depictions of Violence (nothing too graphic but there is a lot of blood), attempted murder, attempted maternal filicide, hints of physical and mental abuse. Please be careful reading this, and enjoy.

It’s hard to breathe. His chest hurts, with every staggering breath making his collapsing lungs ache, each one sounding like a death rattle.

Because that’s exactly what it is – a death rattle.

Marc can’t remember how he got here tonight. The memories were blurry amongst the last few minutes, quickly fading away as blood loss settled in. Red pools dragged behind him in a trail as the teen desperately tried to crawl away from the monster behind him, trying to find help. But no one is around, it’s just the two of them, and she’s still looming over him like a predator that has caught their prey. Marc can see her shadow and the knife that she clutches in her hand.

Marc doesn’t look back around. The room is getting dizzy.. He needs to hurry, he– he doesn’t want to die, please– he’s only fifteen, and his life was shitty, and he hates his abusive mom and his neglectful dad who let it continue, but he never thought that she would ever go this far. He never fucking thought that she would ever take it this fucking far.

She’s saying something behind him, but the words hardly register. They sound shocked. There were repetitions of “...my god, my good lord, what have I done…”, but Marc doesn’t turn back around. He doesn’t care anymore. He’s so fucking scared, one hand clutching onto his wounds and the other grasping the wooden floor to slide himself away.

All of a sudden, the chattering from the monster came to an end. There was resolute silence for a mere second, the only sound being Marc’s labored and pained grunts. Then, the sound of shoes walking away, leaving him to die slowly and... alone.

But he doesn’t look back. He fucking can’t.

Not when the doors and the phone and help was so, so far away, and he’s losing himself rapidly.

“Help…” he calls out, but it sounds far away to him. One hand forward, pull his body with it. One hand forward…and pull…reach forward… and…

He’s slipping. He can feel it. It should be scary, but more than anything he is exhausted.

He comes to a rest at the foot of something hard. Gazing up tiredly, his blurry vision makes out the stone mask of some kind of bird-faced humanoid. It was small, miniature, meant to be a decoration for wherever they were. Funny enough, despite its uncanniness, Marc can’t look away. It was better to look at it than at his lonely surroundings, he kind of thinks…

He will close his eyes for a minute. Just for a minute…then he’ll…ask for help…

—

"Hmm… a little young to be a fist. A bit too young, maybe. But it has been centuries, and I require someone, anyone, to take up the role at last. What do you say, child? Would you like to live and get away from the ones who have hurt you most?

….

All I ask in return is that you shall fight in my name and do the bidding of the night. Protect travelers who walk underneath the stars, in every way that you must, no matter the deed. Whenever the shadows demand it, you must heed their calls. Protect the lost ones, as you were once before.

…

Good. Very well. This will be very interesting indeed. Now, sleep child. Your body must heal. I shall guide you to safety."

—

Wary eyes blink open to minimal light in a sea of darkness. He was dizzy, his eyes swimming momentarily as his hand reached up to rub his temples. The teen looks around, eyeing his surroundings with open confusion as everything registers around him.

He was in an alley. A dingy, fucked up one too, as it had trash everywhere and there were mysterious stains on the concrete not too far beside him. The sources of light were coming from street lamps that lit up the asphalt streets and illuminated the boy’s uncomfortable hidey-hole.

He gets up, grunting as his aching limbs protest. “What in the bloody hell…?” he mutters to himself as he cautiously steps out into the open, seeing no one in sight. The streets were empty, the city was silent, and there was no moon or stars to be seen in the smoggy sky.

And just as suddenly, the quiet was destroyed by the sound of distant gunshots. The teen looks towards their direction and makes a mental note to not fucking go anywhere near there anytime soon.

The boy steps further out into the light, and almost screams when he sees the sight of his own bloody hands and clothes. They were fucking caked in red, making the teen look down the front of his shirt to see where it was he was hurt.

But…there was nothing. He pulls up his sleeves, and his skin was still unharmed.

That just makes it worse though. He gulps, shoving his hands into his pockets as if it would hide the crime scene that he practically emits. If the blood isn’t his, and if he can’t remember where it came from…then that just makes things a hell of a lot harder to figure out.

Steven has woken up many times before in weird settings and situations, but waking up has never been like this before.

There was the sound of sirens now, police and ambulance alike. There was the gleam of a needle on the building’s corner that glowed in the streetlight, prompting Steven to walk even faster. There was even the distant resonant sound of hair-raising cackling, as if through a speaker.

“Sheesh. With this commotion, you’d think I’d somehow wound up in Gotham…” Steven grumbles as he hunches himself down lower, trying to be inconspicuous.

He doesn’t know where he’s going, or what’s going on, or what his plan is exactly, but…but there is always one thing Steve knows that he is good at and can rely on.

He can figure things out. He’ll be able to get through this and make his way back home, surviving on the streets if he has to. He’s sure of it.

#TW blood #TW attempted murder #TW implied abuse #If you don't like this for Moon Son canon u dont have to. Literally do whatever u want with Moon Son it is free real estate!! #Some Context: Marc already has DID but in this AU Khonshu's spirit and the Gift of Chorus make it to where Steve and Jake have their own #suits and souls! #Woah hey that's a good title for this AU. Suits and Souls.... #But anyways if you want the TLDR for this: Marc's mom reaches her edge and takes her anger out on Marc in a deadly way. Realizing what she #has done she leaves Marc to die. OR alternatively she kills herself in order to not face repercussions. Whichever you think works best #Steven finds himself with no memories out in the middle of some random city which he will find out eventually is Gotham. #Also this takes place either in the home or in a museum. I couldnt decide so I made it ambiguous JSADJASIODA #It's short too cause I really dont feel like writing 10k tonight sajdkljasdia #BUT HEY I FINALLY WROTE SOME MOON SON!! YEAAH #Moon Knight #Moon Son Propaganda #Batman #Batfamily

[tvrningout]

#i won't be here for a biiiig chunk of sunday but i'll have some time before work to maybe do some things #and i could possibly work on stuff tonight since i'm in a writing mood #tho ofc if my muses decide this isn't the weekend for spice there's the rest of the week bc i'll spice things up any day hehe #i just!! need somewhere to focus my energy if i'm gonna do something bc my brain isn't gonna let me decide rn #now excuse me i'm gonna get back to writing while this sits <3 #get ready to ramble | ooc

[lesbianlotties]

uh oh!! she (me) has end of the year anxiety!!!

#trying to decide if i should cope by literally getting no sleep tonight or literally sleeping until the big family dinner #maybe some middle ground like staring at the fall for twenty hours straight #you know the feeling? like trying to do everything you didn't do in a year in one night? going over your favorite stuff from the year?? or #doing you favorite stuff to do?? stuff you used to do in previous year?? something you've never done before?? #who am i kidding i can't do anything of that right now i'm back to staring at the wall #no i need sleep no i need to write no i need to read my favorite book nope sleep nope staring at the waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa #ll #sorry

[apathyfairy]

.

#tonight or tomorrow morning actually is the 4 year anniversary of my dog dying and like surprise surprise lol im still not over it like. #i honest to god dont think i ever will. i honestly dont know how people move on and get other pets and just. keep on living like i #understand it like for some people it's part of the healing process but i just could never do it. like i just cant even fathom #i dont know that's not the point. the point is im having such a hard time because everytime i do anything tonight i keep thinking #4 years ago i still had my dog or 4 years ago in 5 hours i didnt know id be going to the vet at 1am and going home without my dog at 5am #and i just keep reliving it no matter how hard i try to not. and on one hand i want it hurt like i want to remember it just to punish myself #i just i just cant move on like it's just. i went 24 years of my life without ever experiencing death and then 4 years ago today my dog dies #in the most tragic possible way ever and then 11 months later my other dog who i had for 17 years since i was 8 dies and yeah still #not over that one either because i never let myself process that or truly grieve her because i had to shut that up real tight #or i would have lost it for real. and i have the most fucked up miserable tragic dreams about her so many nights a week #because she was old and had been u know. like old dogs do they just decline and that was impossibly hard to watch but at least i kind of #knew it was coming u know but like with my other dog. there was just absolutely no warning it was so sudden and it just ripped me apart and #i honest to god will never be okay again and then 6 months after all that i find out my ex died and only because after 6 years i finally #Finally decide to have the guts to talk to him again and apologize and explain and try to be friends and then nope he's dead #then in between all those deaths a super close family friend died and my grandpa my dad's dad died and like it's just #i had never even experienced death before and then all of a sudden i was engulfed in it and i just dont know how to come back from it. #but tonight is just. painful. like i havent even said his name out loud since it happened. i cant talk about him at all just writing this i #want to cry like it just fucking hurts forever. and it should i guess. #and i feel so stupid because so many times i wonder if my cat even remembers them and i wonder if she misses them too and idk #that makes me feel stupid and emotional and im just a wreck but i should be.

[jedi-bird]

Wrote almost a thousand words this morning. Ate entirely too much salt at lunch (instant ramen my beloved, who never fails me). Currently finishing up the laundry from the week and while I should do the dishes, I'm going to be lazy and rest.

#birdy tries to be a good adult #I'm feeling a lot better than yesterday but still don't want to do a lot #and while i should try to write more I'm trying to decide which direction to take the next part in so I'm waiting #I've already restarted this chapter too many times to want to do it again #and while I'm still not satisfied with it at least it's getting written #might go pull some yarn out of the workroom later and try to force myself to start making things again #not sure what though #either a dragon or a blanket #and i might try writing again tonight if my partner has their game night

[smallblueandloud]

always funny rereading notes i left to myself several years ago expecting myself to get back to them within a reasonable timeframe. anyway these are all notes-to-future-self from the planning document of the FSK rewrite, both deleted ones and remaining ones. i think they're funny in succession (i did not end up rewatching anything)

#id in alt #sb and l rambles #sb and l is writing #fic: you're a candle in the window #damn i haven't used that tag in forever #agents of shield #ot3: you can't imagine your life without them #remembered tonight that i am really so fond of this fic and would love to get it done one day #and like! i do have SOME things planned! #as you can maybe tell from this post they are not the MOST attached to canon but also like. i'm so close to throwing canon out the window #like i'm already not writing s4 because i decided that the emotional development would be progressed enough to Literally Change the s4 plot #we can just like! pretend those effects also extend back into s3! #the emotional throughline is the important part here anyway.

[shikai-the-storyteller]

Emo about c!Quackity this evening lads

#i talk #dsmp talk #the joke here is that I'm always emo about c!Quackity #but tonight its specifically because I was thinking about that Karmaland Corpse Bride au someone made #so I rented the movie and just rewatched it for the first time in years and it made me cry a bit #I want to write something for c!Quackity I think it would be cathartic for my soul #I just need to find the right idea #I still have a few thousand words of a draft for one idea but I could never decide how I wanted to format that #sighs. #Im tired. I miss being able to write and draw. I hope I can do that again soon #it would be fun to write some Rubegetta stuff to I had fun writing that meta post #and I got some encouragement unexpectedly from some Spanish fans on twitter which was sweet #again though I just need that spark to start me going

[orcelito]

my fatal flaw . one of them. is that. i have a tendency. to trust my brain too much. but have too low of a work ethic. so im like “if i do well on the exams, then homework won’t be as important to complete”. and sometimes, this turns out okay because i do well on the exams. but if i do Not do well on the exams. it fucks me over so much

me sitting on an 84% for the first exam being like “This will surely let me pass the class” and looking at my homework assignment that draws from a prior homework assignment so Essentially i would have to do twice the work. due tomorrow night

and im just thinking to myself. “is it even worth it?”

#speculation nation #see the idea of getting back on track for the semester is to start doing assignments again #but my brain still does not want it #and im just looking at this shit like 'i have to be up at 8 am for pt tomorrow morning and then work like 6.5 hours' #it would mean no more free time tonight and no more free time tomorrow night #and so im like. 36 points. is that worth it? #ive been keeping up with reading quizzes and i did well with the exam. so if homework and projects suffer it's not the worst #my schooling career is basically the constant question of 'if you dont do your homework can you pass the class?' #if ur smart then oftentimes yes! #im good at taking exams. i also HATE putting my free time into shit #i do hate the idea of just a few hours of time deciding a large portion of the grades. sometimes the largest portions of the grades. #it's this kind of thing that got me a C in my calc class despite doing most of the homework. doing well on all the quizzes. #and getting a 100% on the first exam. which was fucking AMAZING btw im still so proud of that #but i did Balls on the 2nd exam and final so i got a C. i was sooo angry #did pass tho. i sure did fucking pass. #but yea idk my brain is just constantly a hell hole and my body isnt much better. and im constantly overworked #maybe if i wasnt working full time homework would be easier to finish lol #but yea when faced with the next 2 days being very little free time im just like. '36 points is Not worth it' #the slacker me continues. now i may attempt to write some of my gay fanfiction which owns MUCH more of my heart and dedication #my priorities might not be exactly right. but it's what makes me happy so whateverr

[sunshine-in-a-bottle]

How its going

#congrats besties and gamers your clown is a fucking dumbass who decided she could do many things #tbf I fucking. Got farther with the WC au tonight with Ban #but that is a Monster Fic. its going to be like 40 chapters long #I mean Im super fucking excited about it but goddamn #debating breaking into blanks inbox for help writing its thing because I am a Fool who bit off way more than he could chew #Ill probably wake up in a fervor and write staggedduo in the middle of the night for Aspens thats just how it goes with those two #I WANT. TO TALK ABOUT. RIVALSDUO MASS EFFECT SO BAD. SOMEONE PLAY MASS EFFECT SO I CAN TALK #MY OPINIONS ABOUT THEM ARE VERY CORRECT AND YOU SHOULD ALL LISTEN TO ME #.... dont ask about what the concubine fic is about #Philza and Dream being friends??? In this economy??? fuck you they need interactions and Im giving them interactions #SV Dream is just him living cottagecore like with a lot of hurt/comfort and some StagedTrio because I miss them #I had a vaguely smutty idea with Wilbur and MerDream and its not my fault and also Blame Tired. Tired Should Always Be Blamed #but its me so it was intended to be mostly silly and wholesome #the Sap and Dream thing would technically be considered almost done/already done Im just. Terrified to look at it. Its so ugly #It was born out of anger and vague fairy tale related bullshit #We're not gonna talk about that last one. I just do not have the energy to write that anymore #It was fun while it lasted though #yes this post is an excuse for me to yell about my writing that I havent posted yet YES you have seen through my elaborate disguise #now that I rambled bit Im actually excited about working on this stuff again #even if I dont have a lot of people to talk about my writing with its nice just typing in the tags. very lovely very freeing #you should all try this. why doesnt everyone try this #wait someone is still reading this??? What the hell. Send me a chicken emoji in my askbox or something idk

[wabblebees]

.

#met the hottest butch ive ever seen in my whole entire life tonight #nigh-on everyone in the room had fucking heart eyes SO BIG for her the WHOLE TIME. and then #when she said she ''really couldnt do a relationship right now'' #you could hear hearts break in that room fulla gayass bitches #ABSOLUTELY including mine in that count lmao. but also im delusional so even tho after tomorrow i know ill probably never see her again #i am sitting here in bed -- HOURS later -- SIGHING WISTFULLY like a moronnnnn #lmfao. goddamnit. #hopeless romantic central; emphasis on hopeless #she was so fucking funny oh my god. and the goddamn butchivalry was off the CHARTS #i couldnt decide whether to swoon or let my own butch tendencies make me start competing lmfaooo #she was a friend of a friend visiting from the next town over; and this mutual friend had been hyping up her arrival so much id started to #think it was bc she was trying to set us up or something. which legit started to make me kinda nervous before she got here #and now im going fucking insane because oh my GOD #OH MY GODDDDD. #literally just. losing my goddamn mind. i dont know this girl at ALL & ik i dont do casual eeeeeven a little bit & shes NOT looking for That #but... fuck. goddamn. gotDAMN she was so cool #i doubt she was looking at me much If At All lmao; we were all just chilling... im just. objectively Not Good at Being Chill #anyway im writing this here hours later so i dont text our mutual friend at 5am about how rad meeting her was like some kinda creep lmfao #bee speaks #my outfit was cute but i doubt she was lookin; esp since i came straight to the party after a performance so i was in... weird shape lmao #altho im VERY glad we got to meet Before shes supposed to come see the show tomorrow lmao. #like. now at the very least her first impression of me isnt me-as-kreon; asshole misogynistic tyrant dictator-in-chief that he is hdkdgk

[driftwooddestiel]

just took notes on the entirety of the ‘making of’ video for ‘tonight’ (the album) in a notebook 👍 i plan to do this with many more making of videos commentary and interviews, etc. because it is very fun and what can i say im very autistic about this band

#also itll help me remember information or at least be able to go back and relook at stuff that ive learnt from different videos etc #bc i have a resoly bad memory and even tho its usually pretty good when related to stuff im interested in i dont want to take chances #its currently at 3 pages of writing btw #one page is random facts compiled from memory with sources attached #the other two pages are notes on the tonight making of video #ih yeah also one day if i decide i feel like adding genius.com annotations to some of their songs i could use the notebook as easy referenc #and i probably will do that one day cos the current state of the genius.com song annotations on ff songs is #not great #hardly any of the facts have sources and the analysis is almost all just repeating whats being said in the lyrics or complete nonsense #(not wll of it tho theres also good annotations in there ofc)