#deep down I might not be that good

[daily-hanamura]

#p4 #persona 4 #p4g #persona 4 golden #hanamura yosuke #yosuke hanamura #“i should be the one thanking you though” god yosuke GOD he still sees so much of this as him seeking justice for saki huh #nearly one year in and he still feels like this was a responsibility of his. that it was his burden that he had put on to yu. #that initial moment when he asked yu for help in entering the tv world like he still saw it as yu following through with his word primarily #i feel like there's an implication here that he thought yu might/could abandon this task for something else. #rank 10 when yosuke says “somewhere deep down I didn't trust you... no it's more like... i was jealous of you” idk i think on some level #yosuke didn't trust yu. i think yosuke who is used to being let down and used to only being paid lip service and superficial relationships #he didn't believe that someone as competent and as beloved and as enviable as yu would pull through for someone like yosuke #which again i want to shake yosuke like a snowglobe BECAUSE BBYBOY PLS HAVE MORE FAITH IN YOURSELF #DO YOU STILL NOT SEE HOW MUCH YOU'VE CHANGED YU AS MUCH AS HE'S CHANGED YOU #DO YOU KNOW UNDERSTAND THAT WHEN YU WAS THANKING YOU IT WAS FOR THE SAME REASONS?? #THAT YOU STAYED UNFLINCHINGLY BY HIS SIDE THROUGH GOOD TIMES AND BAD?? #THAT YU ALSO HAD HIS BURDEN OF BEING A WILDCARD DESPITE BEING SOMEONE THAT STAYED CAREFULLY DETACHED SOCIALLY #BUT YOU. YOSUKE. YOU WERE THE ONE THAT CHANGED HIS MIND AND HELPED HIM AND MADE HIM BETTER AND I #YU DIDN'T KNOW WHAT LOYALTY AND DEEP MEANINGFUL RELATIONSHIPS LOOKED LIKE EITHER UNTIL YOU AAAA WHY CAN'T YOU SEE THAT #srry idk why that was in all caps i got very passionate for a moment #anyway. them. #he's good with his queue

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

this past week its just been a constant cycle of *normal normal normal* OH FUCK THE SITE UPDATE IS NEARLY UPON US *has to sit down and breathe*

#what will we see... what will we learn... #screaming sobbing throwing up #almost literally! im so hyped im a little nauseous! only a Bit! #i need to calm down! im being too abnormal about it!! #i cant even finish my plate of pickles rn because i Remembered #and now i cant do anything but sit here and vibrate from excitement #deep breaths.... deep breaths.... #absolutely unprompted #i mean feeling physically sick from excitement is not entirely atypical for me #it always makes me feel a lil unwell! whether that excitement is negative like having to drive a Distance #or positive like looking forward to an event! #im gonna feel a lil like throwing up! #its a good discomfort i swear #that being said. #if we get voice lines i might actually have to go for a walk around the block to cool off lmfao

[imminent-danger-came]

continue being a little mean to toh fans please it is really irritating how some act like its got the best writing of any modern cartoon

Daawwwww I don't have it in me. TOH fans love it for a reason, and there are legitimately good moments! It's just not the most complex or well-written show out there—which it doesn't need to be—but I also totally get your exhaustion. It gets tiring seeing people praise it so highly over and over again when it's just like...fine. It didn't do nothing but it also didn't do something, you know? It's main couple is cute and queer, but that's pretty much all there is to them. It has a fun cast of characters, but they all tend to fall into archetypes. Luz is a sweet main character, but she doesn't have any real flaws and kinda takes a back seat to Hunter and Eda (the white people lol). Her foil with Philip was interesting...but then they kinda backed off and went the "you and Belos are nothing alike" direction.

((I'm also going to answer this anon with another: ))

And It's not that an unsympathetic villian is bad, or that Belos would even be sympathetic with added backstory, it's just that...there were a lot of interesting things to explore with his character that were left hanging.

Like, while he's definitely not at all a good person, it's intriguing that he would bother to recreate his brother over and over again knowing that each time the grimwalker was going to betray him. It's intriguing that he was even willing to kill his brother to begin with (though Caleb was super underutilized in general). Like, you can give a villain depth without justifying or victimizing them (hi Finnegran from tdp, I'll also add Spider Queen & LBD here). So it just feels like a missed opportunity all across the board. It's still surprising to me that we got a confirmation on the Wittebane backstory through an unrelated background character, rather than Philip himself (who had literally possessed a main character, and mindscapes had already been well-established....the pieces were all there me thinks).

And obviously it's like, people can love something despite it's flaws, and they can cherish it for the good it has, but they still don't need to praise it as an ultimate form of media, you know? We don't need to pretend toh was this dark and complex story—it was just a story a lot of people liked and resonated with. Which I'm glad it's there for those people, and I'm glad there are options when it comes to queer pieces of media!

That said the show with the best writing of any modern cartoon is The Dragon Prince (streaming on Netflix).

#Monkie Kid while very good is still not that good. I'm sorry lmk. I give you 2nd place. In my heart <3 #Though we'll see. If s5 (or beyond) brings back some stuff from s1 the writing might just be that tight #(aka the skeleton key being given to MK in 1x08 & also the 1x01 seal) #Anyways I feel like I've been too much of a hater recently #but gahhh. toh just did not get that deep. it's like fake deep #Let me explain my thoughts: #Lilith cursed Eda. Spent years trying to force Eda into the coven system to undo her own mistake. #Only to then learn that Belos was never going to heal her sister. And does this impact Eda and Lilith's relationship in any way? Not really #Like yeah sure their relationship improves after Lilith leaves the Emperor's coven. #But I can't help but feel like that situation got boiled down to ''Lilith had a good reason for it so we forgive her :p'' and I'm like NO #WHERE'S THE DRAMA #THAT WAS KINDA SUPER FUCKED UP OF LILITH. A LIFE LONG CURSE THAT SHE GAVE HER SISTER. AND WE'RE GONNA LIKE #GLOSS OVER THAT???? #tis not story telling for me. At least not any more at this stage in my life. #asks #toh critical

[archduke-enver-gortash]

mmm essay about sally and kid gort in the tags (cw for child abuse, mentions of suicide, animal cruelty and a murder attempt. i always hope i don’t have to say this but just in case: i don’t excuse or condone any of her or gort’s behaviour at all.) this is literally not even touching upon everything i have to say because i hit the fucking tag limit lmao. NOBODY READ IT’S BAD BRAINSTORMING I JUST NEEDED TO GET IT OUT SOMEHOW

#thinkin too much about gortie side characters again. #sally this time and why she specifically talks about him the way she does #like dravo is obviously still shitty but to me he was. ‘just ‘neglectful #while sally actively hated and even felt terrorised by her own child #like. it’s not like i don’t understand her at all. #imagine you and your love don’t have much besides each other and your shop and you get pregnant and ready to raise a child #only for it to not be a child he didn’t and doesn’t cry ever and he learns everything so much sooner than most but then he never calls you #his parents and it’s not just a petty thing kids do sometimes you feel that he doesn’t see you as family and the worst part is that you #agree deep down #and as he gets older he doesn’t have any friends and actively rejects the notion of the entire concept #but then as time passes you hear about how he has entire groups of children following him and then several of them commit suicide #and that thing coming to sit with you and dravo at the dinner table says that he did what you did last week when the axe to chop wood broke #and you discarded it and got a new one #and he has these habits of ripping out flowers and making sure that they don’t regrow #and then you hear rumours about a friend’s daughter’s cat disappearing and think nothing of it #until you visit his tree house a month later and find a declawed cat and birds with clipped wings and crushed bugs that he keeps fondly #and then you see him with other children and they don’t know and his face is different and body language is entirely different #and were it not for the fact that you know better you would never see anything but a normal child #and you know that you are one who painstakingly brought this thing that should not be into the world and so you decide to end it all one da #and go to him as he’s asleep with the knife shaking in your hand #but he cries when you’re above him! screams at the top of his lungs! #so you beg for forgiveness even though you don’t deserve it through tears but as soon as the knife is put away you see the act drop and fee #his clever fingers having twisted your brain inside and out and you know that you can do nothing #and so the opportunity arises to at least remove him out of your life if not everyone’s lives and you take it immediately. #but you heard him talk. how he will close his fist around the world one day. and you know that it is not a matter of if but when. #like. imagine that. jesus dude. #like i hc her as someone that is messy and does not know a lot about life and she certainly wouldn’t have been a good mother but the love #or at least desire to love is there somewhere. and believing that having a child is really the only somewhat meaningful thing she can do #with her life. she’s not some hero or rich or anything of note. so there’s a lot obligation and not genuine desire for family here. #but she never really got the chance to be an actual mother in the first place so. who knows what that might have looked like

[vaguely-concerned]

cause of death: the way that even after shaking off zhao yunlan’s grip on his arm in this scene, shen wei still comes back to gently brush their hands together before he moves away

(and zhao yunlan’s fingers curl softly against his hand in answer too)

truly this man is just operating at peak yearning at all times the poor fucker

#I must repeat: THE scene of all time my good god #guardian #zhenhun c drama #weilan #shen wei #zhao yunlan #if I knew how to gif I would gif this. but as it stands please have my meticulous screencap documentation instead lol #also it will be forever hilarious to me that shen wei is more Shook by zhao yunlan being upset with him #than he is when he goes a whole episode thinking he accidentally killed that cat lady fhskfas he's just like 'oh my bad. fs in chat' #he seems mildly pleasantly surprised to find she didn't die after all. as one might be to find there are enough leftovers to eat for dinner #and that's all #and then whenever zhao yunlan is the least bit mad at him he has a small existential breakdown in real time #the power of bae I suppose #(show!shen wei is less overtly hashtag feral deep down but he DOES have thsi phlegmatic mellow savageness I find both deeply endearing #and very very funny #it does make him feel strange and a bit alien in a similar way but by different paths and it's delightful)

[perenlop]

Gengar strikes me as someone who knows he’s a piece of shit and is trying to embrace that. Emphasis on trying. Obviously there’s the fact that he called his group “Team Meanies” and bragged at people’s doorsteps that he was evil and gonna take over the world and stuff. He terrorizes Pokemon into joining his team and doesn’t even seem to respect his own teammates. The entire fugitive arc is him trying to scapegoat the hero for his crimes.

But two things stick out to me.

The first is that Gengar seems to think that being selfish and cruel is human nature.

In the dream eater sequence, Gengar talks about exposing hero and “showing what they’re like inside” purely on the grounds of them being human. I think that’s pretty self explanatory. He thinks that all humans are bad people. He’s speaking from experience, because if HE’S bad then surely all humans are, right?

The second is that Gengar… honestly comes across as self loathing to me, even if he tries to own how shitty he is. Just look at his dialogue during the crowd scene.

This dialogue combined with this expression come across as cracks of guilt to me. He knows what he did and he knows exactly what he’s doing now. And despite everything, I think he hates that. He hates what he did to Gardevoir. He knows it was horrible of him to abandon her after sacrificing herself for him. And he hates that. But he can’t admit it.

I think Gengar trying to take pride in his cruelty is deflection and denial. He couldn’t help what he did to Ninetales and Gardevoir, it was inevitable! He’s human, and all humans are selfish. He can’t change or control that. All he can do is double down over and over while trying (and failing) to escape the consequences. He can’t fathom the idea that a human can be a good person, so he’s not even gonna try to change.

And he hates hero because they are the antithesis to that statement. They want and try to do good wherever they can, and Gengar can’t believe that after learning that they’re human. He projects onto them, insisting that they have to be a bad person, because they’re human. Just like him. He can’t be good. They shouldn’t be good. Because if being good comes so easily to them, then what does that say about him?

And seeing Gardevoir in hero’s dreams talking about how much she cared for him, with sympathy leaking from hero’s heart, shatters that illusion he shrouded himself in.

#also we all make fun of his team name but even that strikes me as like… him being childish deep down #tbh ive never fully played through his story in the post game i just saw it on youtube years ago #so. my thoughts here might change #gengar is one of those characters that i honestly never cared much for growing up but i appreciate him more every time i replay the game #cause i see more and more angles of his character that i can work with. i dont think i ever gave him enough credit tbh djdjdjf #hes a well written character and while i definitely think that the other 3 villains are stronger that hes still pretty damn good #hes also the only other npc whos a former human which is insane to me tbh #echoed voice #pmd posting

[oatbugs]

idk how to live so im going to talk to myself out loud until i do

#listen. take a deep breath. i know your bpm is high but you need to think with me for a second. #remember that you are paper thin. all your facets are sheets of paper and what you gave her is just another one. #make a new one. you dont need it. you dont need her to see you. i know you think you need her but you will be okay. i know its hard. #you wish you could have shown her how you loved her. listen to yourself. you are made of paper. #she might be concrete or maybe wood or maybe gold. you need to start laying your roots elsewhere. shut that thought down #and blink and listen. the parts you keep thinking of arent lost. they still happened and they are yours to keep. #there is beauty in this loss. tell me about the beauty in this loss. its okay to think about it. you got to see it all and nothing more #and this is great because it would have been bad. you know it would be violent in a way you dont need. you know this to be true. #you are going to look at that empty space in her shape and youre going to fill it with everything that happened when you knew her. #the memories with her but then also the the way your friends talked you through it. the game with the clovers. #your first allergic reaction you almost died and you couldnt stop laughing and you were held so close to their hearts. #learning the names for all the floursecent gene tracking dyes that everyone else knows already. about the exam - listen again. #i know you think if you fail your life is over but you need to try your best. youre not going to get a good grade in a uni test for the fir #youre going to make up for it. youre going to make sure you make up for it. do you understand? i love you. you have to do this. #right now you need to sit up. breathe. i know your heart hurts. go to the living room. grab something to eat. i dont care if you feel full. #youre going to clean your mattress heater. youre going to study a bit longer and then youre going to sleep. youre going to tell your mother #im sorry and i might genuinely fail a test. shes going to tell you its okay. if you do badly in this course you can just become a neurosurg #just agree. dont argue right now. its okay. youre okay. you are paper thin. i know any puncture hurts. #breathe. think of your friends. think of their hands in yours. it isnt eternal.youve lived through worse. the empty sky is still beautiful. #the lack of her is still beautiful

[iknowwhereyousleepatnight]

:(

#cw animal injury #i turned on the lights and our dog is covered in blood like??? hello??? #since when were you doing that and why didn't you tell me??? *cue frantic searching for gauze* #there's a big cut where his ankle meets his leg (inside of the hind right leg) #i have no idea how that happened #our dogs play rough but have never drawn blood #and he was outside alone and he was acting normally and not whining or anything? like speak up man i need to know this shit #his name is bunny btw and he's a big dog. purebred great pyrenees(?) if the ppl we got him from are to be trusted #i don't know how he got hurt #its way too big/deep for a cat to have done it and even if they're really upset they just paw at his face #my only guess is that there's something sharp in the yard? but it's too dark to look #idfk but we found the gauze and stuff and he did Not like that process good thing there were 3 ppl awake to hold him down safely #he still didn't whine through all of that though like. pls speak up man. we gotta know if ur in pain so we can fix it #i'm hoping it doesn't get infected. we don't have money to go to the vet but he's my sister's dog and she might actually kill someone if #he isn't fine #she has a theory that he may have gotten cut on smth our brother threw out there and like. she may literally kill him if this #was his fault and bunny isn't fine #so far he seems fine there wasn't too much blood and there seems to just be the one cut #but i didn't hear him yelp or whine or anything #and he didn't seem to be limping but the lights were off #idk man but we have cleaned him up as best we can for now but it is the middle of the night so we'll see what we can do in the morning

[runefactorynonsense]

Cozytober - Day 26 - Catnap

#Cozytober #Margot's RF Art #rune factory #rf1 #rf #This sketch was actually done back on June 6th of this year. I was knee deep in my Seattle vacation planning/stress and never finished it-- #I think I'd just found Home Run Derby tickets finally?? Or not long after that. And I was still scared to death I was making a mistake. #Silly past Margot! It was the best day of your life! #So I remember I did this sketch as just general human pose practice after someone else did the 'tree nap' pose of their OCs. #And so I grabbed it for today's prompt because!! I still liked how the anatomy turned out! #Context my brain goes with; #if I subscribe to the 'Raguna on the run from the Empire' theory then I strongly lean toward the Lynette pairing. #Safe life in Kardia- doesn't feel like the right context most of the time. Not bad. Just. Not as interesting a story. #On the run- This feels like just... a smart choice. Group up once those Empire targeting efforts escalate. #Perhaps he has to deal with the painful compromise and necessity of her lethality because he might be more likely to survive #And he WANTS to survive #AKA- if you can escape. Escape. He's good at it. But if the situation comes down to it.... Lynette can make sure who walks out. #And to reverse the pov- maybe a bit of atonement on her part? All the blood is only on her hands. She'll keep it that way. Let her do that. #He shouldn't have to. It's all her fault anyway. #Also please laugh at me as it took me half an hour to remember the word COMPROMISE. I was so mad. #Rune Factory Raguna #RF Raguna #Rune Factory Lynette #RF Lynette #another ship tag to fill #Raguna x Lynette

[automatonknight]

i hope u kno i think ur tf2posting is awesome because i am too scared to play it (pvp....) but really love tf2 anyway

AWW THANK YOU SO MUCH I'M SO GLAD TO HEAR GENUINELY!!!!!!<333 i love sharing honestly it feels so special...not to get sappy again but this is my first video game experience like that, since tf2 is the first like. multiplayer shooter i've ever played and it's just. so nice when someone teaches me how to do silly stuff like the "intel funny" or when i have the honor of participating in a server-wide dance party. it's just so!!! well. nice and really cool honestly :]

#ask #like. total strangers i may not stumble upon again are making my day better just because i think we just. like being nice to eachother #deep down kind of #as i said that thrusting sniper may not know how hard that made me laugh and the dude who said 'good job' to me also might not know how #special i felt but. well i feel all of that and i'll remember it. do you get me #love forever ok? #and honestly! i know some fears are hard to overcome i was definitely shaking when i joined into my first match but people are really ok #most of the time! and if they aren't honestly just hit the bricks! if i'm not having fun or see an asshole i usually que for another game #2fort i feel like is also super forgiving since people are kind of expecting silly players? but even on idk payload maps nobody gave me any #trouble for being a 50 minutes of playtime noob pyro. and you get better the longer you play like genuinely! #like with the whole spy thing. you start to get a feel for when someone is acting suspicious #recently i've also been unlearning going with the rocket launchers against pyros but that also took like. 5 reflected rocket deaths to #really stick. ok i'm rambling now but it can be a wonderful game :3 #i know this all might sound silly but i started like. kind of genuinely playing games only last summer so discovering all of these new #things is just ahh!!! it's so cool!

[sunboki]

this is kinda personal but i love how much trust i still have in my ex, like we can talk about everything together and we’re still best friends it’s great

he texted me earlier n linked an article abt chan’s bbl rumors and we laughed our asses off for a full forty minutes afterwards this is where this post came from lol

#bc so many of my friends have such toxic breakups #but he’s so refreshing #we talk abt everything together and he texts me all the time saying things like #( how is skz doing? ) bc he knew i loved them even tho he found it kinda awkward #even though he was the fattest chan stan deep down 🤞🏻 #i just wish other people could have good exes like this :( #anyways .. might delete later #aug : speaks

[pawsitivevibe]

I don't know if this is just a thing in most online breed communities or what, but the English Cocker groups are obsessed with feeding raw and pushing raw and home-cooked and what not.

When I was really into the Silken Windhound groups when we thought we might get one, they were the same. Big raw pushers. I will say that I don't really see it in the many Mudi groups I'm in. There's a higher population of Europeans in those though, so I do wonder if the raw obsession is a really North American thing and that's why? Or it just varies by breed? Oh especially because different breeds draw different people? (ie ECS have a lot of older white women)

#I'm not anti raw feeding really. Well I'm anti feeding my dogs it lol #Also if your dog has been fed raw I don't really want it to lick me. I'm good without salmonella thanks. #I still have war flashbacks from the raw fed dog that vomited all over the surgery ward and down the hallway at the vet I used to work at #That was one of the most disgusting deep cleans I ever had to do 🤢 #That might have been the 2nd worst smell ever ... #The worst smell was when someone brought in their dog who'd died at home but they'd left it outside in a garbage bag over the weekend ... #That was so disgusting oh my god

[catkin-morgs-kookaburralover]

i remember once seeing an ad for scar reducing creams and ended up deciding no that's not reasonable to buy if it's literally self inflicted. but because of this now being in a visible place (can probably hide until summer, but after it's too warm to wear long sleeves... oh gosh. :< ) I feel like I probably should do research on how to minimise scarring at least for visible cuts for the sake of others.

and maybe invest in a nice light summer cardigan :) you know those pretty lacy ones, I bet I could pull that off, and I've wanted one for ages so this might be my motivation :)

....I should also do research on how to hide them before they've healed, because I've got a simulation next Tuesday. If necessary I talk to the person running the sim and get permission to be in long sleeves for that

oh gosh why did I forget. I'll have to be in short sleeves for placement. oh gosh oh gosh I am an idiot

#[editing to add that there is somewhat graphic description of self harm below. i'm no judge of how graphic or otherwise something is but i #kinda described it a bit ig] #I might invest in some good coverage makeup of some kind idk. if i can find something like that that will hide the scarring. but like. it's #stretching halfway along my forearm and it will all scar #tmi sorry #looks nasty already but at least it's stopped bleeding #shoutout to the knife sharpener i could Not use at the time so it wasn't as deep as it would've been #anyway #such is life #tw sh #puddleglum hours #personal #the first time i harmed was May last year. i only actually seriously started harming during february this year and all this time i have #worked SO HARD on making sure i DON'T harm in a visible place #and then! whaddaya know! it got too much! #honestly tho i'd nearly talked myself down it was rlly weird #bc it was like i just. blanked for a second and became aware of it having happened a second later it was weird #the muscles feel really weird now tho idk why #not damaged or i don't think so anyway and yknow. didn't need stitches or anything #don't know how deep they are

[welcometogrouchland]

Getting back into comics is fun. Minus the Getting Back Into Comics part of it all

#ramblings of a lunatic #fascinating opinions from everyone. truly every death threat over characterization is in proportion and within reason #sorry just. I've seen things #i think dc tumblr might be one of the only fandoms I've seen where it's equally as toxic as it's twitter counterpart #but on the other hand. funny and pretty drawings <3 #I'm generally taking a ''its not that deep unless i feel like it'' approach to comics #not everything needs to be high art and i can excuse work where i maybe don't agree with certain aspects or portrayals #as long as i can find some kind of value in it #which i think you genuinely can in most comics #i think maybe we should all just drink some water. y'know? #anyway i read stargirl: the lost children (was very good! i didn't get most of the golden age refs- #-and also i. didn't know i had to read the sprinbreak special but! besides that! i enjoyed it!- #-todd naucks art is great (i have yj98 stockholm syndrome for it <3) and i like courtney and emiko being friends!- #-also SECRET MENTION WOOOOO GRETA HAYES STANS STAY WINNING(???do we???) #uhhh what else #ooh i read truth & justice no.6 which was a fun story w/ Damian and the batfam! #characterization was off but in a ''we're playing things fast and loose for comedy's sake'' plus they did great work w/ damian #i definitely get why some ppl are sad he's losing some of his surly and more formal edge in his character voice #but i think I'm cool with it tho I'd like if it was maybe casually addressed in story as part of his character development #he's let his guard down. he talks like a shitty teen and not an 18th century warlord now. he's picked up some nightwingisms #he's not crushingly insecure and by consequence violent and vicious anymore #but like again I'd like it acknowledged slightly but that's just me. i at least appreciate all the affection his current writer- #-Joshua Williamson has for damian. like i read adam glass' teen titans run (bad. btw <3) you don't know how comforting this is to me #he called Damian his little babyman on a podcast and i nearly jumped out of my seat thinking ''HES JUST LIKE ME FOR REAL!!!'' #he clearly bases most of his work with damian off of tomasi's work with the character which is comforting i think #where was i going with this #anyway yeah. comics tumblr is WILD there is no way you guys are ever getting me to go there full time ever again #once I figure out how to draw dc characters (again... it's been so long) then it's OVER for you bitches

[aeide-thea]

the problem for me with both witcher s3 and wot s2—well, okay, one of a few problems, but the one i'm singling out at the moment—is that i've just reached a point with SFF where i've largely used up what little patience i ever possessed for the 'young trainee gets frustrated that they're not progressing faster and gets reckless' trope?

like it's not that it's not a plausible way for someone to behave, it totally is! but. i don't know. i need a, like, decade-long break where i just get stories starring middle-aged people who have, probably painfully, learned some damn patience and slow perseverance…

#tvblogging #also honestly #bookblogging #anyway i grudgingly did a google bc it's good to take my own medicine wrt researching at least a little before you hit post #so i might try some of the things that came up #but like. idk. really at some level i just want‚ idk‚ someone to option a tarma and kethry show or sth #Competent Cheerfully Jaded Mercs Have SFF Adventures #…is this my cue to revisit ancient misty lackey in 2023. possibly. god. #but like. i just want more coherent writing and less petulant teens #wot is better than witcher and also has moiraine but like. we're spending too much time with the babs. i want my adult qpr back :( #also obviously all of this is Not Unrelated 2 my personal situation where i've like. aged out of really relating to Youth #but remain pretty deeply alienated by most (cishet‚ reproductive‚ *productive* for that matter) visions of adulthood #so it's like. where are the narratives abt ppl who are out of sync with the expected narratives #but also bc i'm having such a bitch of a time with life i'm very hard to please bc crankiness comes much more easily than pleasure #anyway. unfortunately i got the gnothi seauton bit down but in itself that gets you precisely nowhere #just like. deep in the omphaloskeptic hole. emphasis on skeptic

[jorvikzelda]

This may be a good and normal thing but I have absolutely zero regrets about having purchased the laptop last night. Like all day yesterday and even as I was buying I was going oh god should I should I not but now I’m not even having second thoughts about the huge display lmao

#SO FUCKING GLAD that I actually did some extra research rather than just going meh the one I looked at before is probably better #I think it was a SIGN that I got paid a little early for the month’s work and then like the day after the laptop I bought went on sale #(Didn’t actually pay immediately so I didn’t USE any of that money but that is besides the point) #Only with the reservation of man… it’s big… and heavy… and REALLY huge and that’s bad… #I HAD deep down been going ‘man if only there was a bigger laptop with the same specs as the one I wanna buy’ #And then!!! This baby pops up!! With a big display and BETTER specs!!!!!!!! #Cannot begin to express my excitement at playing Real People Games like that hasn’t even been a POSSIBILITY #Stray is at the top of my list right next to ranch of rivershine #And also probably Elden Ring that shit looks NEAT #(Also yes there is a catch and a reason this one is cheaper even though it’s better! The one I was planning on getting had an OLED display #This one’s just a normal good old LCD display. But in all honesty that is ABSOLUTELY a sacrifice I’m willing to make lol) #z talks #not horse game #Also the fact it’s not currently in stock so I’ll be waiting almost 3 weeks for it also very much feels like a good thing #Like. I have a Date on which I can expect to Receive It. And that means I have a very set time frame for the stuff I want to do to prepare #(mainly organise my cloud storage to make sure everything’s where it should be) #(but that’s a bigger problem than it might sound like because I have a LOT of files)