Inspired by the prompt Love is just a four-letter word by @sal-si-puedes for @steddielovemonth day 27
the definition of love
wc: 944 | rated: t | tags: Established Relationship, Sappy Steddie, Dustin and Eddie friendship, Dustin and Steve friendship, Dustin is going through a bit of heartbreak
“This is so stupid! What even is love?”
It’s not a question Eddie thought he’d ever get asked by Dustin. But he gets it, knows how much it hurts to have your heart broken for the very first time. Especially as a teenager, when it feels like it’s literally the end of the world.
Eddie thinks about it, let’s the question sink in.
What is love?
Well, technically speaking, love is just a four-letter word. But it’s also so much more than that.
Love is a variety of expressions and emotions. Love is big gestures and little things that go unnoticed in the day to day life.
To Eddie, it’s the fear of losing Steve. It’s saying ‘Drive safe’ like a little prayer every day when Steve leaves for work in the mornings because Eddie couldn’t bear if anything ever happened to him.
Love is adoration, telling Steve ‘You look so hot in those jeans’ or ‘My pretty boy’ just to see him blush, just to let him know how beautiful he is.
Love is pride. To be rightfully self-appreciating of the things they’ve accomplished as a couple – overcoming insecurities, sticking together even through tough times, making plans for a future together.
Love is never wanting to be apart from Steve.
Love is a three-word sentence, a confession of the heart Eddie makes every night before they fall asleep in each other’s arms.
Sometimes it’s saying ‘I’m sorry’ after a fight. It’s saying ‘I cooked your favourite meal’ or ‘Let’s watch that movie you like’.
Love is saying ‘Thank you’ and ‘Pleaaase, baby’.
Other times it’s not saying anything at all, when Eddie just lets his lips pour all his feelings into a kiss or when he lets his fingers worship Steve’s body, caressing each scar, each blemish, every perfect imperfection that makes him unique.
It’s the flittering butterfly wings he feels in his stomach when Steve smiles at him and the prickling on his skin he feels whenever they touch.
Love is holding each other. Having your favourite person’s arms wrapped around you for comfort, when you’re cold, or just for the sake being close.
Sometimes, love isn’t gentle. It’s rough and wild. Sometimes it hurts, runs through your veins like a raging fire, smouldering in your soul.
It’s passion and longing.
Love is taking each other apart, becoming one in heated moments. It’s the urge to bite and suck and lick, to savour the taste of sweat drenched skin and spit slick holes.
It’s the rhythm of their bodies moving in sync, grinding, and gliding, and sinking in.
It’s falling together and landing on clouds.
Love is the delightful sound Steve makes when he laughs loudly at one of Eddie’s stupid jokes and the soft, whispered words they share in the dark of the night.
It’s a melody Eddie absently plays on his guitar while his mind is filled with thoughts about Steve.
Love is a four-letter word but sometimes it’s five – because it’s Liebe in German, and Amour in French, and to Eddie it’s Steve.
Love is everything, and if it’s true then it’s forever.
Love is what makes Eddie’s life complete.
“You’ll know once you find it,” Eddie finally says, placing a comforting arm on Dustin’s shoulders to pull him into a brotherly hug.
It might not be the most satisfying answer but it’s the best he can give. And he knows one day Dustin will understand, when he finds the person holding the other half to his heart in their chest.
Eddie never expected to find his other half in Steve of all people but now that he knows what it’s like to love him and to be loved by him, he never wants to be without again.
“You just gotta be patient,” he adds, can see Dustin rolling his eyes without seeing his face, huffing and sniffling into his shirt.
There’s a gentle knock and when he looks up, Eddie finds Steve’s worried face peeking through the half-open door.
‘Is everything okay?’ Steve mouths, pointing at Dustin who still hasn’t let go of Eddie.
Eddie smiles and nods at his boyfriend, forming a silent ‘I love you’ with his lips, just because.
Steve turns around and tries to make his way back into the hallway.
“I know you’re there, Steve. Just get your ass in here,” Dustin mumbles into Eddie’s embrace, waving a hand in the general direction of Steve.
He only looks up once he can feel Steve’s hand on his back.
“Suzie broke up with me.”
“I’m sorry, buddy. That sucks.”
Dustin wipes his eyes with his sleeve, shrugs his shoulders, and sighs defeated.
“Love is bullshit.”
Steve and Eddie share a look, soft and doting.
“Yeah it is,” Steve smiles, “but it’s also the best goddamn thing in the world.”
Eddie huffs out a laugh, takes Steve’s hand in his and kisses the back of it.
“Ugh, you guys are the worst. I knew I should’ve gone to Robin instead. At least she knows what it’s like to be hopeless.”
With that being said, Dustin makes his way out of the room, ready to wallow alone in his heartbreak.
But before he exists through the door, he turns around one more time, finds Steve and Eddie still holding hands, looking at each other in a way that makes him want to barf and melt at the same time.
Because no matter how much he hates to admit – whatever they have, theirs is the true definition of love.
Maybe, Dustin thinks, feels something like hope blooming in his chest despite the lingering sadness, one day, I’ll find something just as perfect and wonderful.
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