Me opening AO3 every morning like it’s the daily news
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will blade ever do a love confession ever ever
blade isn't one for traditional declarations of love.
he's barely aware of how deep his attachment to your runs. it's a simple formula in his fragmented mind — being around you silences The Horrors, hence his proclivity for seeking you out. the full gravitas remains unexplored as a sort of subconscious defense mechanism. if he examines your undefined relationship too closely, dwells on it too long, he risks exposing how integral you've become. it's picking at a loose thread that could unravel what little sense of self he has left.
blade's goal is a permanent death. love, tricky thing that it is, throws that whole ambition into disarray. in an ironic twist, this makes him 'hate' you for a time. how dare you make him care. how dare you overcomplicate what should've been so cut and dry. now he's forced to contend with these feelings that don't go away even if his chest cavity is torn asunder.
what was meant to be his haven is now the source of his worst torments.
the closest thing you'll get to a verbal confession is when, with a solemn air, he reveals:
"you're worth living for."
it's as heavy as a sinner's confession. self-loathing underpinnings and all. contempt, yearning, regret; it rolls together to form something unsightly but undeniably him. he wishes he met you sooner, that he could give you his best, not this mockery of the man he once was. to make matters worse, you don't let him go like you probably should. you pick the jagged pieces up and stick them back together, regardless of how they prick your skin.
he lets you, awaiting the day you realize he isn't worth shedding blood over. you won't, though. and is that not why he's shattered into so many pieces to begin with?
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PSA: bi!Buck is valid whether he likes Eddie or likes Tommy. He's valid if he likes both. He's valid if he dates women. Just because some of the fans don't like Tommy, doesn't mean we should scream about not wanting bi!Buck anymore. Tommy is a temporary addition to the show, but his contribution to Buck's character development would have an everlasting impact. If Tommy helps him realize it - or if he doesn't - his character will be significant to the story in some way!
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I just know that if felix saw this he would’ve crumbled to the floor drooling, wanting to sink his teeth in olivers ass
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This series is just proving that we want everyone to fuck everybody.
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this is how crimson rivers angst is born. apparently 🫡
@blurryayse @zeppazariel
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