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#deleting later because what if they read this ugh their sleep schedule is off the charts
born-to-lose · 3 years
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I'm too smitten and anxious to function ugh
#writing? idk her. i prefer indulging in fake scenarios and then worrying about the tiniest things#i know i said i wouldn't go into detail but i'm terrible at hiding this kind of stuff#and most of y'all probably know who i'm talking about#deleting later because what if they read this ugh their sleep schedule is off the charts#i even went back to writing love songs so you know this is bad cause i only do that when i start bottling everything up#but literally i haven't been able to focus since the weekend for reasons you may know about#i'm vagueposting so hard now i'm sorry#i'm just kinda happy i'm not too depressed anymore and i haven't felt like this since my asshole ex and i broke up#i'm giddy and all and get super excited when they show up in my notes#am i in too deep? probably#but also i'm too scared to get straight to the point because i've done this many times and it always failed#i don't think i've had such a huge crush on anyone in like a year#and idk how to handle this#i went on a trip down memory lane today and read old chats and my god i fell hard#i'm definitely misinterpreting a lot of things here but i can't help it#fuck fuck fuck#i'm going to cry bye#ok one more thing i know i shouldn't be too worried about someone not replying because they haven't really been active on tumblr today#but i kinda am?? like shit tumblr let me delete messages i think i said something wrong#aaaaa damn#congratulations you have just witnessed a whole ass mental breakdown#sorry you had to read all of this#my heartbreak playlist is on why do i do this to myself#mel talks
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jjuzoir · 3 years
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Random Kageyama Tobio HCS
Word Count: 1851
Warnings: just... me being in love with a m*n other than masumi 😔 also! these are my headcanons as in,,, what i personally i think he’d be like ‼️ also me projecting my ideal man into him (as if he wasn’t it already 😋)
A/N: i... i love tobio so much it’s literally unreal... i couldn’t wait for a request (i’m still working on the remaining 4 too lolol) so take me projecting my love for tobio >:(
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— Kageyama normally wears loose fitting clothes or athletic-style clothing. His favorite go to outfits tends to be a loose tee, some loose pants with an obnoxious Nike logo he swears are super cool but look like two garbage bags sewed together, and running shoes. Throw a hoodie in there for colder weather, even then he still manages to look good.
— He takes very good care of his hair, like freaky good care, because of Miwa. Once she enrolled in cosmetology school and she saw Kageyama use the same baby shampoo from when they were kids she freaked out (if she’d been any later he’d start using 3-in-1) and chewed his ear off about hair care. His hair is super shiny and there’s literally no freeze, he uses nice smelling shampoo and conditioner too. Ugh, I love him.
— He has a very sensitive nose but it gets clogged easily so he doesn’t notice much unless it miraculously unclogs itself and he’s complaining about everything.
— “Eh! Hinata, why’d you smell like a fucking axe bottle?!” “Why does no one say anything about Tsukishima smelling like strawberries?” “Yamaguchi smells like... milk.” “Hah?! Sugawara smells bad-?!”
— He says he’s a picky eater to appear cool but as long as you don’t say what’s in the food he’ll down it. He’ll say he doesn’t like carrots but if you give him a salad with carrots he might even say “it’s the best salad he’s ever had”.
— He’s a hot sleeper, and not in the “oh he’s sexy” type of way. I’m talking, he’ll sweat buckets if he sleeps with anything other than a flimsy white t-shirt and his underwear.
— Might be me projecting my love for bunny teeth but he has bunny teeth, his front teeth are a bit bigger than average (not to the point it’s super noticeable but it’s still something Miwa teased him about), his aunties probably squeezed his cheeks and called him “baby bunny” when he was younger.
— He doesn’t go to sleep later than 9PM, he thinks if he does it’ll ruin his schedule (which it will) and fuck up his body - he’s seen Miwa screw up hers after she pulled a bunch of all nighters in her third year in high school and has been afraid since.
— The type to forget people were coming over and come out of his room shirtless asking for his clean underwear.
— His sister forced him to let her cut and style his hair which led to many questionable hairstyles. Tsukishima is genuinely so grateful to Miwa, especially when she was first starting - he’s got some pictures of Tobio with the shortest most embarrassing bangs ever saved in his phone in a file for blackmail if the need for it ever presented itself.
— Likes pissing people off on purpose sometimes, during one of the training camps he probably walked into the bath with socks on and was made fun of but out of spite he just… never took them off. Said he’d done it on purpose and all too. Tanaka cried out of fear for like a hot minute when he saw him standing under the shower with Iron Man socks on.
— He’s so petty too, if you make fun of him for messing up he’ll remember until you embarrass yourself to make fun of you. And when I say he remembers, I mean it - he can’t for his life remember when to use make and do in english but he remembers when Hinata made fun of him for wearing different socks back on their first year and yes he will bring it up on their second year when he did the same thing what are you going to do about it?
— Probably got scouted for a modeling agency once and began running away because he thought they were trying to kidnap him.
— If he had Tiktok… he would’ve gone viral after posting a video of him practicing, he posted for a while for fun and to flex on people that he was hot but then he saw a comment saying they wanted to drink his milk under a video of him drinking milk and he deleted his account, he can’t buy from that brand for a while.
— He’s got a video of a gorilla walking in two legs saved on his phone for when he’s feeling down and watches it whenever he’s not going well. People think he’s texting his S/O but no, he’s just watching a gorilla walk like minecraft Steve.
— He can’t pose for pictures to save his life, his default pose is an NPC stance with his arms stiffly hanging down and his eyes wide in surprise, don’t ask him to smile or else he will look like a serial killer.
— He’s got a bit of baby fat on his cheeks that won’t disappear no matter what. It’s become a pre-game ritual to pinch his cheeks. He’s also got dimples you can really only see when he smiles naturally but he doesn’t know and he’d get shy if he knew and try covering his face so don’t tell him, that’s a fact he told me so himself.
— Cannot dance to save his life. He’s so long (?) his limb control is non-existent, it appears in game and vanishes when he steps out of the court. He really just bounces on his heels and moves his arms like a t-rex, don’t ask more of him.
— Buys his clothes one size bigger just in case and Miwa teases him saying he’ll need them when he gets old and fat.
— Gets asked out often but always rejects, then has the audacity to complain he’s never dated anyone like he hasn’t turned down half of the school's population.
— Can’t sing. He’s got a nice speaking voice but ask him to sing and he’s out of tone, out of sync, out of breath, and out of the room in 5 seconds.
— Sugawara joked about having him singing as his alarm clock and Kageyama actually believed him, probably sent him a new recording as a gift after he annoyed him during practice.
— Surprisingly funny when he wants to but most jokes fly over people’s heads since he seems so serious most of the time, it annoys him to no end. Yachi still struggles differentiating when he is and isn’t joking because his tone literally doesn’t change at all and she doesn’t want to offend him.
— When he was younger he liked to collect rocks, not even the pretty ones he’d pick the most average, raggedy rocks off the ground and clean them up and tuck them to bed because he saw Miwa play with her barbies like that. Still owns his first rock, he named it “Johnson” after Dwayne Johnson, aka the rock (he’s had to explain it so many times he’s exhausted).
— Accidentally drank expired milk once and didn’t notice until his stomach began hurting and he thought he became lactose intolerant and he was inconsolable for days until he realized it had expired like a month ago - he went on a milk shopping spree and the milk sales that week saw a 20% rise from the last few months.
— Tobio had bad handwriting until he was in Junior High because his teachers couldn’t understand him and had him practice calligraphy, his handwriting is now one of the prettiest ones in the team and he’s the official inker of the VBC posters (as designated by Goddess Yachi Hitoka herself).
— His biggest fear for a long time was getting eaten by piranhas because he saw it happen so often in cartoon shows he genuinely thought it was going to be a bigger deal than it turned out to be but for like a solid 6 years of his life he avoided suspicions puddles just in case.
— Kageyama has a habit of rolling and unrolling his sleeves when he’s deep in thought, it soon made way to a habit of checking his wrist watch (he absolutely has a wrist watch, you cannot change my mind on that) but not actually reading it.
— His nails are very pretty, like most setters, he takes very good care of them. They’re filed down to a perfect length and he puts oils and creams, his hands in general are so nice. He takes a lot of pride in them, you know his cuticles are pushed back and trimmed and he could absolutely be a hand model. Kags’ hands are calloused, he’s a volleyball player of course they are, but it’s not to the extent of Ushijima or Daichi’s hands.
— Talking about hands, it’s probably one of his favorite features on people. He loves holding hands with his S/O and tracing the wrinkles in their palm, being able to interlock fingers with them and feel the bumps in them.
— Mumbles to himself when in thought too! Very nonsensical if you’re not informed on what he’s thinking about, if he’s thinking about you he’ll mumble your name or something like “pretty eyes”.
— Has a very healthy diet, like extremely healthy and thought out. He won’t eat anything too sugary or that could throw off his body, but he does have cheat days (which are rare but exist). He also doesn’t drink much soda or alcohol (once he’s of age).
— Things like smoking are a big no, he takes so much care of his body he wouldn’t even touch a cigarette or be near a smoking area, lowkey paranoid of ingesting the smoke too.
— When he’s older I can see him having a dog and a cat, the dog would be a big dog; if they stood on two paws it’d be the same height as you, he’d name or something like Tobias and think he was super clever and funny, the cat would probably a small cat he’d name Milk (it probably would be a black cat too but he does not care).
— Probably tried baby formula because he heard it was a substitute for breast milk. No further comments on this.
— I feel like he doesn’t listen to music, but if he had to choose something he’d pick instrumental music - not orchestral music or anything like that - but more of a chill, no deep meaning just guitar and piano track. I could see him listening to Shego Sekito or Joe Hisashi on occasion, he might even listen to some 2000’s pop if he wants something to pump him up during training (he works out to Brittney Spears’ “Womanizer”).
— A cuddle-bug when he’s sleepy, he’ll throw himself across his S/O and not move at all, he just wants to stay there and not move ever again (or at least until he’s not feeling like passing out). He’ll like to wrap himself around them and cuddle their neck, he’ll attach himself to their arm like it’s a lifeline.
— In other words, Kageyama Tobio… b-boyfriend material.
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Eccentricity [Chapter 6: You Know You Got Me In The Palm Of Your Hand]
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Series Summary: Joe Mazzello is a nice guy with a weird family. A VERY weird family. They have a secret, and you have a choice to make. Potentially a better love story than Twilight.
Chapter Title Is A Lyric From: Mean It by Lauv.
Chapter Warnings: Language, references to sex and violence, slavery in American history.
Other Chapters (And All My Writing) Available: HERE
Tagging: @queen-turtle-boiii​​​​​ @bramblesforbreakfast​​​​​​ @writerxinthedark​​ @maggieroseevans​​​​​​ @culturefiendtrashqueen​​​​​​ @imnotvibingveryguccimrstark​​​​​​ @escabell​​​​​​ @im-an-adult-ish​​​​​​ @someforeigntragedy​​​​​​ @imtheinvisiblequeen​​​​​​​​​​ @deacyblues​​​​​​ ​ @tensecondvacation​​​​​​​ @brianssixpence​​​​​​ @seven-seas-of-ham-on-rhye​​ @some-major-ishues​​ @haileymorelikestupid​​ @loveandbeloved29​​
Please yell at me if I forget to tag you! 💜
What The Fuck, Washington Animals Are Weird
I woke up in a bedroom drenched in a rainbow of darkness, shades of grey vacillating from charcoal to the wings of a mourning dove; indolent dawn rain pattered against the window. There were no glaring veins of sunlight spilling in through gaps in the curtains, no promise of dry invigorating heat, no whistle of vicious parched wind. Toto, we’re not in Phoenix anymore.
“Ugh,” I complained to the empty room, unraveling from a tangle of blankets patterned with cacti and pure white clouds and rust-orange suns.
I clicked off my iPhone alarm—I’d beaten it by two minutes; my circadian rhythm was finally conceding that this whole Pacific Time thing was permanent—and read my nine new texts from Joe.
3:12 a.m.: Hey it’s an emergency what’s the plural of octopus
3:13 a.m.: Rami is insisting that it is octopuses
3:14 a.m.: But it’s octopi, right? Right?? I just announced in front of everyone that it’s octopi
3:15 a.m.: Scarlett is verbally abusing me
3:18 a.m.: Oh you are probably asleep
3:21 a.m.: Update, according to the internet Rami is right and now I have to assume a new identity and move to Antarctica
3:25 a.m.: We can discuss logistics of the Antarctica relocation tomorrow
3:26 a.m.: Hope you like penguins
3:30 a.m.: Okay goodnight!! Don’t let the mythical creatures bite!!
“That man,” I murmured to myself, smiling.
I typed out: It’s definitely octopuses, you clown. Then I deleted ‘clown’ and replaced it with its Italian equivalent: pagliaccio. Text sent.
Joe responded almost instantly. I had to ask Lucy what pagliaccio meant and now she’s verbally abusing me too. Send help. See you at lunch. xx
Wait, two Xs? What did Xs mean?? Kisses???
Did Joseph Francis Mazzello, sexy undead Italian man, just send me multiple text kisses?
“You’re gonna give me an aneurism, Chicago boy,” I muttered at my phone as I slid it into the pocket of my flannel pajama pants. And then I glanced out the bedroom window into a tussle of rain and thick, caliginous fog.
Just a few feet beyond the misted glass, its leathery talons hooked around a branch of Charlie’s decades-old red alder tree, was an owl. But not just any owl. A hulking, spotlessly white owl.
“Oh, hey, you,” I whispered, leaning closer, pressing my palms against the cold window. My hands left transparent imprints in the condensation. “Hey, buddy. Aren’t you supposed to be sleeping? I sure wish I was. Did something wake you up? Did your idiot vampire boyfriend disturb you with a series of ridiculous texts?”
The owl just contemplated me with unnervingly vast, slick, engrossed eyes. And there was something else, too: those eyes were blood red.
“So you’re an albino owl, huh big guy? Good for you. You know, usually albino animals don’t last all that long in the wild. Because they’re really easy for predators and prey to spot. Or they get skin cancer. So congratulations on living to become the voluptuous, tremendously creepy creature that you are today. Job well done.”
The owl stared back at me unflinchingly, blinked, then resumed staring. Rainwater gathered in swelling beads like blood drops on its ivory-colored beak and talons.
“Well,” I noted, turning away and grabbing my shower towel off the back of the desk chair. “You don’t get that in Arizona.”
Thirty minutes later, I was bounding down the stairs two at a time to meet Charlie in the kitchen. He was browsing through his daily newspaper at the table, drinking coffee and nibbling messily on burnt triangles of toast. Crumbs littered his moustache.
“You didn’t tell me that living here came with the added benefit of freaky albino animal friends.”
Charlie crinkled his forehead at me. “Huh?”
“How was bowling with the dads last night?”
“Oh, awesome!” he exclaimed, folding up his newspaper and slapping it down on the table. “We bowled against the team from Mora and it came right down to the wire, but we caught them. Dr. Lee got a strike on his very last turn. He always seems to do that...he’ll be bowling hit or miss all night and then when it really matters he manages to pull a strike out of nowhere. He’s a beast.”
“He’s a pretty remarkable guy,” I agreed, rummaging through the cabinets for Pop-Tarts.
“He mentioned that you and his son were really hitting it off,” Charlie said, grinning. “Not the ragey blond one. The spindly annoying one. What’s his name again? Josh? Jimmy?”
“Joe.” I conjured up my best poker face of lofty indifference. It crumbled like a sandcastle beneath reckless, rushing footsteps.
“Ohhhh, I saw that!” Charlie said, pointing, delighted. “Check out that smile. My gorgeous, brilliant progeny has a crush. I knew it. I knew you wouldn’t be single for long up here. Alright, I’m ready. Bring on the grandchildren.”
“Shut up,” I pleaded good-naturedly.
“Relax, I have great news. According to Gwil, that Joe kid is pretty wild about you too.”
“Oh, is that what you old guys do between bowling turns? Betray your children’s deepest confidences? Matchmake them over nachos and chili cheese dogs?” Still, my curiosity was piqued. “What else did Dr. Lee say about Joe?”
“I think the exact word he used was...” Charlie reminisced, sipping his coffee, curls of steam pouring over the rim of the mug. “Smitten.”
Supernatural Pictionary
I turned the notebook to Joe so he could see; everyone else momentarily covered their eyes or looked away. Then Lucy started the timer on her iPhone. Thirty seconds.
“Go!” Lucy announced.
“I think it’s a boat,” Rami said, hesitantly, haltingly, squinting at Joe with great concentration.
“Do you?” Joe teased.
“Yeah. But I’m also getting something about a fish.”
“Maybe I’m trying to make you think it’s a fish because it’s actually a boat,” Joe replied flippantly.
Rami muttered: “Or you want me to think it’s a boat because it’s actually a fish.”
“Interesting.”
“Now you’re mentally singing Never Gonna Give You Up just to fuck with me.”
Joe gasped, pressing a palm to his chest. “That doesn’t sound like something I would do!”
Scarlett snickered, dunking her chicken tender in honey mustard, slurping Coke through a straw clenched between crimson-painted lips. “That sounds exactly like something you would do.”
“Fifteen seconds,” Lucy warned.
“Fish or boat, boat or fish...” Rami chanted, peering fixedly at Joe.
“Make a decision,” I taunted, hugging the notebook to my chest.
“I’m going with boat,” Rami decided.
“Final answer?” Lucy asked, then stopped the timer when Rami nodded.
“Loser!” Joe cackled victoriously, leaping out of his chair, waving his L-shaped fingers in the air. Calawah University students at nearby tables glanced over with wide, startled eyes, their beloved chicken tenders briefly forgotten. “How’s it feel to not win every round of a game, huh?! Loser!”
I flipped my notebook so Rami could see the extremely unskilled pencil sketch I’d drawn there: a smiling fish. “My condolences.”
“Damn.” Rami pulled a ten-dollar bill out of his wallet and slid it across the table to Joe. Joe snatched it up, tucked it into the waistline of his jeans like a stripper collecting money in her G-string, and slung his arm around my shoulders.
“We are the champions. Bask in our glory.”
Scarlett turned on her iPhone flashlight and waved it in slow arcs over her head. “Youuuuu are the champions, my friendssssss...”
From my usual lunch table, Jessica gazed at my esteemed place among the Lees with palpable envy, resting her chin in her hands. I had worked out a schedule that seemed fairly obvious given my extensive experience as a child of divorce: lunch with Jessica et al. one day, lunch with the Lees the next. I took a bite of the Chipotle veggie bowl that Joe had insisted on ordering for me and tossed Jessica a sympathetic wave. Get Ben’s Snapchat for me! she mouthed back. I harbored serious doubts that Benjamin August Hardy, former professional assassin, born in 1893, had a Snapchat.
Joe’s words from last week rolled around in my head; I could see him all over again, nodding to the enormous painting hung in Gwil’s upstairs office, telling me about those startling, ethereal figures who had initiated Ben into life as a vampire. They call themselves the Draghi. They collect dues from covens, offer protection, keep order, protect our secrets. But they also demand loyalty. They force people they want into service. They might try to make it seem like you have a choice, but you don’t. They destroy anyone who tries to resist them. And they feed on humans.
“This is so awesome,” Lucy sighed, elated. “We could never play Pictionary before, drawing something is way too much of a mental process, Rami always figured it out right away...”
But now they had a built-in blindfold, someone who could draw without Rami getting a peek into their thoughts, a fighting chance at hiding the truth from him...for thirty seconds, at least.
“Okay Benny Boy, you’re up.” Joe darted over to Ben’s side of the table and massaged his tense, muscular shoulders as Ben grimaced. “You got this. I believe in you. Baby Swan is gonna pitch you a home run.”
“I’ll pass,” Ben said.
“You can’t!” Lucy cried. “Ben, please? Rami got Scarlett’s, and then he didn’t get Joe’s...and I know he’s going to see though me immediately. You’re our only chance to tie things up and maybe beat him!”
“Traitor,” Rami told Lucy affectionately.
“Uhh...” Ben hesitated, glimpsing longingly at the doors that led outside to the grove of bigleaf maple trees. He was fidgeting restlessly with his vape pen.
“Come on, Benny!” Joe begged. “I’ll owe you. I’ll do anything.”
Ben perked up a little bit. “You’ll do my Calc 2 homework for a month?”
Joe groaned theatrically, but nodded. He was wearing a grey U Chicago hoodie today. “Fine. Okay. But you’re gonna have to learn that shit eventually, I can’t take the MCAT for you.”
“Deal.” Ben bumped his knuckles against Joe’s.
“Batter up,” Joe heralded in his best mock-umpire voice, grinning at me expectantly, drumming the table with his palms. “Go Baby Swan, go! What will she choose? Will she continue with the nautical theme? Will she change it up, maybe switch to beloved Chicago landmarks? Baseball or food? Will she invent a variety of pizza even more despicable than pineapple?”
“Hm.” I flipped to a fresh notebook page, scratched my temple with the eraser end of the pencil, then quickly sketched a picture for Ben. “Okay, I’m ready.” I showed the drawing to Ben while everyone else covered their eyes.
Ben shook his head, scowling. “You’ll have to try again. I have no idea what that is.”
“Really?!” I checked the picture again. Okay, it definitely didn’t belong in the Louvre or anything, but it was lifelike enough to be decipherable. “You don’t recognize it? At all?”
“No,” Ben replied flatly.
From behind his shielded eyes, Rami scanned through the images in Ben’s mind. He dropped his hands onto the table. “SpongeBob?!”
“Who...?” Ben ventured.
Everyone else looked too. “Oh yeah, that’s definitely SpongeBob,” Joe said, then chuckled. “Aww, Baby Swan, you even remembered his little necktie!”
“It’s so cute!” Lucy trilled.
Ben just stared at the picture, blinking, completely lost, increasingly morose. And now there was a new guest at the table; or maybe not a new one, maybe just a quiet one, something that perched on the ledge of every conversation and field of vision just waiting to tap its claws against the wall and make its presence known: that interminable reminder of Ben’s unconventional past life, of how incomparable his vampiric upbringing was to those of the rest of the Lee kids.
“Benny Boy, you’ve never seen SpongeBob?” Joe inquired gently. “No problem. We’ll have a marathon tonight. I have the entire series on DVD. Also several Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy action figures.”
Scarlett snorted. “This is why you’ve been single since Hoover was president.”
“I wasn’t single the whole time,” Joe corrected.
“Oh, really?” Not that I’m interested, my voice suggested. I was a total liar. I was super interested. Thank the great deity that Rami and Ben couldn’t read me like a restaurant menu. Today’s specials are Being In Love With Someone Wildly Inappropriate for $15.99, and also Lamenting My Own Lack Of Sexual Experience for $11.99. Oh, and clam chowder.
“He had a couple of...what would you call them?” Scarlett combed her elegant fingers through her voluminous blonde hair. “What’s the modern vernacular? Fuck buddies? Booty calls? Netflix and chill partners?”
My stomach lurched; I nonchalantly buried my fork in a mountain of guacamole and left it there. I kept my lips turned up into a smile like a mask. Of course he’s loved other people. Duh. He’s hot and immortal. Get over it. But that didn’t calm my pounding heartbeat at all, didn’t soothe that sudden and irrational melancholy.
“Whoa whoa whoa, okay, you’re making it sound way worse than it was,” Joe protested, glancing at me nervously.
Scarlett continued: “It wasn’t serious, whatever it was. None of them would have cared about your action figure collection or obsession with a city you haven’t lived in for fifty years. It wasn’t your personality they wanted. Thank god.”
Oh this is bad, I thought helplessly. How am I ever going to be able to compete with the memory of countless gorgeous vampire girlfriends?
“Uh, ScarJo, you’re single too.” And Joe’s nickname for her was strangely apt; Scarlett could pass for Scarlett Johansson’s younger, blonder, much hotter sister. And Scarlett Johansson, in case you’re somehow unaware, is already pretty fucking hot.
Scarlett flashed a grin. “Entirely by choice.”
“And much to Mercy’s eternal and profound concern,” Lucy told me. “She stages an intervention at least twice a month. Did I overhear one last week, Scarlett?”
“Oh jesus, yeah. I was like, ‘Mom, what the hell do I need a husband for? I have my own money. I can fix household appliances. I have a vibrator. I’m good to go.’”
Joe rocked back in his chair, howling. “You did not tell Mom that!”
“I did. She was so distraught. She just kind of pinched her eyes shut and shuddered and then went out back to feed the alpacas.”
“Scarlett, babe,” Rami managed between gales of laughter. “A vibrator isn’t going to keep you company for all of eternity. It’s not a suitable substitute for a life partner.”
“You’re right. It’s even better. It’ll never abandon or disappoint me. Assuming I keep the batteries fresh, of course.”
“Oh my god,” Lucy giggled into her hands.
“She’s not wrong,” I said, shrugging, sipping my Diet Coke.  
And Joe peered over at me, surprised, intrigued, slowly raising his thin dark eyebrows. I winked back. Yeah, okay, I’ve never slept with someone. But that doesn’t mean I’ve never had an orgasm.
“Ah, loud thoughts! Loud thoughts! Joe, please!” Rami moaned, pressing his balled fists to his forehead.
Ben smirked. “There’s a color I’ve never seen from you before, Joe.”
“This family is the worst!” Joe exploded.
“I like that girl,” Scarlett decided, signaling to me with glossy maroon fingernails. “She can stay.”
Joe sighed, flustered, then shook it off as he turned to me. “You coming over tonight?”
“I can’t spend every night at your house petting alpacas, mob guy.”
“Yeah?” he asked, smiling, draping his arm around the back of my chair. “Why not?”
“Well, my tonight-specific reason is that I’m visiting a friend.”
“Cool. Your friends are my friends. Can I visit too?”
“You’re aware that you’re a legit stalker, right?” But actually, Archer was dying to meet Joe: the loud Lee, the approachable Lee, the Lee who I definitely liked more than a Tinder swipe could ever convey. This could work. “Offer to buy dinner and you can come.”
“I’m a walking Visa, baby.”
Ben stood, hauled on his backpack, gathered up his trash to throw away. “I need a smoke break before Chem. See you guys later.”
“Don’t forget!” Joe called after him. “SpongeBob marathon starts at 8! I’ll bring the Milk Duds!”
And when Ben disappeared through the doors, a solemn hush descended over the table.
“Poor guy,” Lucy said softly. The other Lees nodded.
And again, I recalled what Joe had told me in Gwil’s office, what he had said when I asked how Ben came to join the Lee family. He was assigned to us, to be the liaison to our coven. And Gwil saw something in him. Potential, suffering, unrealized decency, I don’t know. But Gwil worked on him for years, trying to convince Ben to leave the Draghi when his contract was up and come live with us. To give a peaceful life a try. And to be honest, Ben never seemed interested. But something must have resonated with him, because we opened the front door on October 15th, 2016 and he was sitting on the steps of our porch with a single suitcase, puffing on that fucking vape pen and watching the storm clouds roll in off the Pacific Ocean.
But why would they just let him leave? I had asked, tracing my fingertips over the uncanny and magnificent faces in that painting. Why would they let him live?
Because they know how valuable he is. And because they think they can get him back.
“I think he’s a good person,” I said, breaking the silence. “You know. Underneath the whole being raised to be a killing machine thing.”
“Yeah,” Rami replied, frowning thoughtfully. “Just try not to spend too much time alone with him.”
Car Jacks And Sneak Attacks
“Joe, this is Archer James Foxchild, my first-ever best friend.”
“It’s a pleasure to finally meet you!” Joe said, shaking Archer’s oil-stained hand. “I understand you are really good at making mud pies and poking dead animals with sticks.”
Archer chuckled. “It’s true. We found a shark tooth down at La Push one time and I convinced Baby Swan here that it was from a sea monster. She had nightmares for months. Charlie called my dad over it and I got my Game Boy taken away.”
“No!” Joe gasped in horror. “Were you a Pokémon guy?”
“For sure.”
“Ruby or Sapphire?”
“Emerald.”
Joe grinned. “This dude knows what’s up.”
“And to think, my grandpa tried to tell me that you guys were freaks,” Archer replied.
“Well,” Joe conceded. “Not all of us.”  
“Maybe you two should start dating,” I said. “Don’t mind me. I’ll just sit in my Honda and eat my Taco Bell cheese quesadillas and Cinnamon Twists and try not to interrupt all the sex.”
“Yes, you brought Taco Bell,” Archer sighed euphorically. “Give me five minutes, I just gotta finish rotating these tires real quick.” He jogged to the other end of the garage, knelt beside a Ford Mustang that was propped up on a jack, and starting twisting off lug nuts with a tire iron.
“You have a nice place here,” Joe observed, strolling around the small garage with his hands in the front pocket of his U Chicago hoodie, eyeing the fractures in the concrete floor and the spidering cracks in the windows. “You have any investors?”
“Are you kidding?!” Archer replied from the Mustang. “No, man, it’s just me. I rent for now, but at some point I’ll buy my own shop. Once I’ve saved up enough. A great big one with shiny new equipment and no mice squeaking behind the walls.”
“What’s your cash flow like?”
“I’m netting around three grand a month after taxes.”
“Not bad!” Joe noted admiringly.
“Yeah. It’s a hustle, but I love it.”
“Hey, I don’t know if you’d be interested—and absolutely no pressure if you’re not, really—but I do a lot of work with start-ups and I’d love to help you get into your own shop. By this Christmas, preferably. If we can work out a deal.”
“Really?!” Archer peeked incredulously over the hood of the Mustang.
“Absolutely.”
Archer beamed at me. “This guy is willing to drop serious cash to look good in front of you. You should probably marry him. No prenup though.”
I held my pinky out towards Joe, grinning. “No more sad prenups.”
He laughed and hooked my pinky with his. “Bankrupt me, bitch.”
I heard the metallic clang of a lug nut hitting the concrete floor and rolling under the Mustang. “Come back here, you bastard,” Archer muttered, then dropped to his stomach and crawled beneath the car.
“Hey, kid, be careful,” I fretted, crossing my arms across my chest and taking a step closer.
“Relax, Baby Swan, I am a professional, changing a tire for me is like feeding a fish for you, so just chill and keep fantasizing about those Cinnamon Twists—”
There was a squeal of metal as the car jack collapsed and the Mustang came crashing down. In a fraction of a second—faster than I could see him moving, faster than I could loose a scream—Joe had soared across the garage, yanked Archer out from beneath the falling Mustang, and dragged him to the center of the room.
“Oh fuck,” Archer wheezed, his dark eyes huge and fascinated and horrified. “Grandpa was right.”
I’d Do Anything For Love (But I Won’t Do That)
We rolled up to the Lee house in my 1999 Honda Accord just as I polished off the last of my Cinnamon Twists and Archer chewed, tentatively and dazedly, on a Cheesy Gordita Crunch. The sun was beginning to set in a clouded sky that perpetually threatened rain.
He asked Joe for the fifth time from the back seat: “But wait, seriously, no one is going to eat me, right? Because I’m too young to die. I haven’t taken enough vacations yet. I can’t die without seeing Hawaii. I want to swim with the sea turtles.”
“No, none of us have ever eaten people. Well, almost none of us. Maybe stay away from Ben.”
“I would like a little more exposition,” Archer replied, blanching.
“Hey, if you stay until 8, you guys can join us for the SpongeBob marathon!”
Gwil and Mercy were waiting on the front porch, thanks to Joe’s ‘hey I accidentally exposed myself as a paranormal being and now we have a new friend, plz don’t be mad okay love you see you soon!1!!’ text.
“Welcome, sweetheart!” Mercy fussed, enfolding Archer into her arms as soon as he stepped out of the Honda. “Would you like some hummingbird cake? I just baked it this morning. And maybe some sweet tea too. And some peanut butter cookies. And banana pudding.”
“Sure,” he responded, bewildered. This lady does not seem like a bloodsucking demon, that voice said. And he was absolutely right.
“I’ll fix you up a tray,” Mercy promised, and hurried into the house.
“We’re so very happy to have you, Mr. Foxchild.” Gwil shook Archer’s hand firmly. “We don’t get many visitors around here. I’m sure you understand why.”
“My grandpa always insisted that there was something off about you guys. Especially you, Dr. Lee. Said you shouldn’t still be around.”
“Yes, I imagine that would have been disconcerting for him. He must have remembered us from the 1940s...that’s the last time we settled down in Forks. It’s not often that someone recognizes us after so long, but it happens. It was just Mercy and me and Rami and Joe back then. And look how far we’ve come.” Gwil beamed warmly, then turned to Joe. “But really, son, you’re going to have to stop telling humans about us.”
“Hold up, I was not responsible for her!” Joe exclaimed, waving at me. “Take it up with Ben!”
The garage door rumbled open and Scarlett sauntered out, wiping her filthy hands with a rag. She halted abruptly, stood there in her high-waisted vintage jeans and black crop top and bare feet with maroon-colored toenails, tilted her head and pondered Archer with an innocent sort of curiosity that I hadn’t seen from her before.
“Wait,” Archer said, gaping. “Is that...is that an Aston Martin Vantage in there?!”
“You bet,” Scarlett replied. “You want to learn how to work on it?”
“Uh, hell to the yeah!” He trotted over and they vanished into the garage together.
“Huh,” Joe muttered, watching them. “She was nice to him. Very weird.” He whirled back to me. “Anyway, come on. I promised you an education in classic rock music. And I shall deliver.”
Joe’s bedroom was a chaotic jumble of economics textbooks and Chicago Cubs paraphernalia and U Chicago apparel and action figures and comic books and classic rock posters. There was a massive Italian flag tacked to the wall above his bed. But what caught my attention immediately was a life-sized cardboard cutout of Ben lurking in the corner by a bookshelf full of cassette tapes.
“How is there any possible logical explanation for that?” I asked, pointing.
“Oh, that! That was a joke. When Ben first showed up, he pretty much lived in his room and never came out. Gwil was worried. Mercy was heartbroken. So I made a cardboard cutout of him and would bring it to family activities and do this really deep and seductive Ben voice when I pretended to have conversations with him. It gave the whole situation some levity...and I think Ben secretly liked that we missed him enough to make an artificial version to fill the void.”
“So this bitchy, brooding, blood-craving Ben I met is actually a drastic improvement?”
“Oh, Baby Swan,” Joe confided, almost sadly. “You have no idea what he was like four years ago.”
“I’m glad he has you. All of you. That he has a chance to get better.”
“I think you might be good for him too. Seeing a human as a real person instead of a walking, talking Hi-C juice box. And you care about him, don’t you? Despite everything.”
“Of course. It’s not his fault they taught him to be a monster.”  
Joe just looked at me for a while, and then he cradled my face with one hand and grazed a thumb across my cheek “You’re never going to stop saying things that knock me into next week, are you?”
“Joe...” I hesitated, laying my hand over his. His skin was smooth and yielding yet strong, cool yet not unnaturally so. Refreshing. Safe. Fan-fucking-tastic. Oh noooooo. “Are we a thing?”
“Why? Do you want to be a thing?”
“Oh, uh, no, I was just wondering if we were.”
He stepped away, teasing me with a crooked smirk. “...So you don’t want to be a thing?”
“What would that entail?”
“Well...we’d be an official thing, you and me.” He shot finger guns at me, and then towards himself. “Which means you can’t be a thing with anyone else. And neither can I.”
“Ahhh, I see. So this thing is an exclusive thing.”
“Will you shut up and just admit that you’d totally be thrilled to be a thing with me?”
“Fine. Whatever. We’re a thing.”
“Nice.” He high-fived me.
“This is the most romantic moment of my life.”
“But wait, there’s more.” He went to the bookshelf, browsed through his cassette tape collection, found the one he wanted and popped it into a boombox that was probably older than I was. The frantic opening piano notes of I’d Do Anything For Love poured out.
“Meat Loaf,” I said in disbelief. “Really. This is the product of your superior taste in music. This is the culmination of over a century of musical experience. Meat Loaf.”
“The man is a genius!”
“This is all an elaborate joke about my vegetarianism, isn’t it?”
“No,” Joe mused. “But now that you mention it, I have yet another reason to force you to appreciate this song.” He took my hand in his, spun me around like a ballerina in a slow and careful circle, sang along—with extreme and dramatic enthusiasm—to the music.
“And I would do anything for love
I'd run right into hell and back
I would do anything for love
I'd never lie to you and that's a fact...”
“I don’t dance,” I cautioned him, laying a palm against his chest to catch my balance. That brisk, comforting scent of pine and snow and peppermint was everywhere. It feels like I can’t stand to be away from him. Like I’ll never get close enough. “I am terribly uncoordinated. I will step all over your feet. And I’m really not sure if I can trust you. You didn’t even know the plural form of octopus until like eighteen hours ago. You’re kind of a disaster. A, you know, uh, unexpectedly charming, unconventionally super cute, kind of bizarrely enchanting disaster.”
“Yeah,” Joe whispered, smiling, tilting up my chin, leaning in to kiss me. “I like you too.”
Cato
He came out of the oak trees like a ghost, pushing aside massive chandeliers of Spanish moss that blotted out the dusk sun, his expensive shoes sloshing in the marshy water that flooded the rice field. He was wearing a full suit, but no top hat; his hair was black and chin-length and wild around his face. And at first I thought he was a hallucination, a dream conjured by heat sickness or those first dreaded signs of malaria. He was unnervingly, uncommonly beautiful; beautiful like a hurricane, beautiful like lightning or an eclipse. But he was real. I straightened up as I watched him approach, my back aching in protest, a basket full of seedlings slung over my shoulder.
“Mr. Cato.”
His voice, clear and beckoning and twisted by an accent I’d never heard before, rang in my skull like church bells. He called me mister. This white man called me mister.
“Yes sir?” And I almost added: You want to be careful there, sir. The water moccasins like to hide among the tree roots, especially when the sun starts going down. But I had an inexplicable feeling that this man wasn’t afraid of things like snakes. Maybe the snakes should be afraid of him.
“Mr. Cato,” he said again, this time to himself, very quietly, tasting it.
I kept trying to look away, to disentangle my gaze from him like a hook out of a sturgeon’s mouth, because staring piercingly and astonished at a white man like that in the rice swamps of South Carolina in 1851 could get me beaten or the lash, could get my teeth pried right out of my jaw. But it didn’t seem to bother him. He grinned, hugely, all-knowingly, under prehistoric golden eyes like an alligator’s. He knew exactly what he was doing to me. And he was proud.
“Do you want to be free?” he asked, almost hissed, still grinning from the tree line.
What kind of question was that? Did a sandpiper want to fly? Did a coyote want dirt under its paws and flesh disappearing down its throat? But that wasn’t something you ever confessed aloud, not if you wanted your feet on the ground instead of swinging ten inches above it. But this man wasn’t a master, wasn’t an overseer. He wasn’t from the South. He didn’t carry a whip or a club to remind you of the rules of the world. He stood there tall and radiant in the shadows of the fading daylight like he was the one who wrote the rules to begin with; which meant that maybe he could change them. “Yes sir.”
“I can only take you,” the man warned. “No others. No family. No friends.”
“No trouble, sir,” I told him. “They sold my family. They hanged my friends.”
The man’s grin stretched wider under glinting eyes. His canine teeth were sharp, I realized: like a coyote’s, like a snake’s fangs. He held out his hand. “We are going to get along very well, you and I.”
I let the basket fall from my shoulder. I slogged through the mud and rows of wispy verdant rice plants to meet him in the shade of the oak trees. And there, for the first time in forever, a man with skin the color of bones looked me dead in the eye and shook my scarred hand.
“Welcome, Cato,” he whispered; and I was home.
He took my face in his cool palms, gingerly, reverently, like a lover. He touched his teeth to my throat. And every nerve ending in my body flooded with wildfire as he dragged me, screaming, into the depths of the forest.
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mollydollyjournals · 3 years
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I'm under 155 🎉 but also I slept later so it could be just a lower reading due to that. Idk. I'm going nocturnal again. It's so annoying that my body clock is so screwy. But if I try to get up earlier I just end up really dizzy until I eventually pass out and sleep anyway and it makes my sleep schedule even worse and ugh. So I'm just going to do my usual and be nocturnal for a while until I'm back to being awake during the day again.
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I actually weighed twice earlier, for whatever reason. The second time I weighed it showed 33.2% body fat and 29.9% subcutaneous fat. I deleted the second reading because I didn't want to have two on the same day and I wasn't really sure which was accurate so I just went for the higher one. But maybe I'm on the border? I don't know. I guess I'll see when I have more readings and can get a better overall idea of things.
I'm still not really sure what's up with the skeletal muscle reading. The blue is for a low reading, and it goes green in the middle and orange for high, but I'm sure high would be the better reading. Skeletal muscle is kind of just your regular muscle so having more of it would be good...? Idk. My reading is going up anyway. It's up 0.2% since the 16th. That's only 4 days and I haven't done any strength training so Im not expecting anything dramatic, but I'd rather it goes up than down.
I feel sick again today. Could still be alcohol related, as I drank within the past 2 days. Not yesterday though so I might feel better later, or if not then hopefully tomorrow. I'm also going to stop trying to get up during the day so I'll have had enough sleep. Today I slept badly because I didn't fall asleep until well into the morning, and then my alarms went off and woke me up. Idk. I'm not sure what to do today. There's a storm so I don't want to go for a walk even if I'm able. A light indoor workout would be better. So hopefully I won't feel so sick later.
I had my usual breakfast salad. I normally have 4 things for breakfast, including coffee and salad, and one of the things I ran out of. I had some in the fridge but they were out of date. So I missed that part. It's annoying because I'm pretty sure it's one of the things that helps me not binge and also helps digestion, even though it's only a small thing. I also like to have them in the house as potential snacks during the day because they're low cal etc. Irritating.
So I had my usual salad and the other normal stuff. I wasn't about to replace my missing thing with something else higher in calories. Later I think I'll make another miso soup. It was really good yesterday. And knowing it's also such a healthy low calorie option ugh I love it. This might be my ideal diet plan. It's low calorie, low fat, low carb, fairly high fiber, hydrating, and I actually like everything so it doesn't even feel like denying myself. The denying myself feel is only in between meals or in terms of physical hunger, since it's still not really a lot of food, but that's fine for me. Up to a point anyway. I said yesterday I was going to write out a plan or list for this sort of thing and make sure I have that one proper meal scheduled in. That's where I'll have any carbs or fats I want and it'll hopefully kick my metabolism a bit. The rest of the time I think I'll just have salad and miso soup.
Other than writing out plans and schedules...idk what to do. I need to wash my hair and I should try to do that whole self maintenance thing. I should maybe check my waist and hip measurements to see if they've changed at all. Take my other measurements and log them. I don't know. Maybe if I have another coffee later I'll have the energy to get up and do something. My house needs cleaning too so that could be my light workout
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writerunsolved · 5 years
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The Drunken Mistake - Ch. 5
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Category: F/M
Fandom: Real Person Fiction
Relationship: Tom Hiddleston/Reader
Genres: Fluff and Humor
Language: English
Chapters: 5/?
Summary:  You're a young up-and-coming singer based in London who has just released her first album.
After a wild night at the VMAs and some heavy partying and drinking at the afterparty, you write and publish a drunken tweet about a certain celebrity and one of their friends. You only realise what you've done the next day when a slew of texts and calls wakes you up to a dreadful but expected hangover. You immediately delete the tweet, but you're left to deal with the consequences. A public apology would probably be enough to make everything go away if you hadn't been invited to a movie premiere where said celebrity is most certainly going to be.
You decide that the best course of action will be to try and avoid them, but your plans almost never go the way you want them to.
Author’s Note: First of all, I want to thank you all for your patience. The holiday season has been quite busy and stressful, which is the reason why it took me longer than usual to update. Either way, I hope you enjoy this chapter!
Ch. 1 - Ch. 2 - Ch. 3 - Ch. 4
Chapter Five - Food For Anxiety
-
A couple of days later, you found yourself at the canteen again. You were having a short lunch break with Linda before recording for a BuzzFeed interview, Nina would be meeting the both of you there later as she was already otherwise occupied for lunch. It was finally the Friday of a really busy week, and you were already looking forward to the unusual free weekend you would be getting starting the next day.
You’d contacted your sister the day before, letting her know that you would be free that Saturday for lunch. It was rare for you not to have any commitments on a weekend, but not for her. Her nine-to-five job left most of her Saturdays and Sundays open, so it was usually up to you to carve out a couple of hours from your schedule to meet her and catch up on what was going on in your personal lives.
“It feels like I haven’t had a free weekend in months,” started Linda around a bite of her salad, “I can’t wait for this day to be over so I can go home and sleep for fifteen hours straight.”
“Yeah, me too,” you agreed, “I’ve been dying to watch this new movie that came out, but I’ve been getting home late almost every day.”
“What movie?” she asked, all the while decisively stabbing into a cherry tomato that burst all over her lettuce leaves. Sometimes watching Linda eat was like a nature documentary: she was driven in every aspect of life, and her eating habits weren’t any different. She used sharp and calculated movements and every bite was almost the exact same size as the one before.
“I can’t remember the exact title.” You were mesmerised watching her for a few seconds, so you didn’t immediately answer, “It’s along the lines of ‘Over My Body’ or something like that,” you shook your head trying to remember more accurately but failed, “It’s an Italian documentary, actually.”
She hummed in response and kept chewing on her lunch; you were about to dig back into your own plate when your phone, which had been sitting by your napkin, vibrated with a text alert.
Linda looked over in curiosity, you also glanced at the screen where Tom’s name and the first line of the text could be seen clearly. You looked to her to gauge her reaction and she was still staring at the phone, a sly smile on her lips. She finally looked up at you and said, “Sorry, didn’t mean to pry,” but you could tell she wasn’t chastised at all because her smile didn’t falter as she went back to her salad.
You put down your fork and picked up the device to open the text, which read, “Hi! I’ll be finishing the recording for my voice acting project later today and I know this is sudden, but I’m free tomorrow night and I’m not sure when again after that so I was thinking we could meet? It’s totally fine if you’re busy, but I thought I might ask.”
You quickly typed in “Hey! I’m actually free tomorrow, so I’m totally game… I have an interview in a bit, but let’s talk again later and settle on time and place?” and sent your answer.
“Oh wow, you must be crushing pretty bad,” Linda spoke again.
You put the phone screen-down on the table and picked up your fork, responding only with an inquisitive sound.
“Honey, you’re texting and smiling,” she explained, “That means trouble.”
You hadn’t even noticed yourself smiling, but now that she’d pointed it out it was undeniable. You tried to command your mouth to stop, morphing it into a weird half-grimace and quickly denied, “No, I’m not!” But she wasn’t looking at you anymore, and she didn’t need to to know that she was right.
She hummed knowingly, chewing carefully and slowly on another bite of salad. Then she lifted her eyes to you and resolutely said, “Yes, you were.” before looking back to her salad. Finally, she asked you, “How long have you been texting him?”
You used your fork to push the little that was left of your lunch around your plate with intent, unwilling to look into her eyes for fear of being too easily read, and attempted a casual answer, “A little more than a couple of weeks, I guess.”
Linda swallowed the last of her lunch and grabbed the water bottle in front of her, sitting back on her chair and idly playing with the cap without opening it. Unfazed by your vagueness and clearly aware of what you were trying to do, she replied, “So since you first met him at the premiere.”
Still desperately clinging to your coolness, you finally left your plate alone and looked up at her. Then you shrugged and nodded, “Yeah, I reckon that’s more or less it.”
She raised an incredulous eyebrow and finally unscrewed the cap off the bottle. Then, she took a sip, her fixed gaze into your eyes not faltering for even one second. When she was done, she closed the lid and put the bottle back on the table.
Her undivided attention and silence finally got to you and you gave up the façade. “Fine!” you huffed, throwing up your hands, “Yes, we’ve been texting since the day after the premiere, and I even met him in person once if you must know!” You rolled your eyes in fake exasperation and leaned back into your chair.
That elicited a small incredulous laugh from her and a “What? When?”
“Yeah, I met him by chance a couple of days ago after work,” you explained, “We bumped into each other and grabbed a coffee.”
She was gaping at you, excitement in her eyes. When you didn’t continue, she asked, “And then?”
“And then nothing,” you replied, “We only stayed for a bit, he got a call and had to go back to work.” You shrugged again and took a sip of the cappuccino you’d ordered with your lunch.
“Then,” she started, “what was that about just now?”
You hesitated. You weren’t sure you wanted to delve into details. You knew that ever since you’d met Tom at the premiere and you’d arranged to go to dinner together, everyone was expecting something romantic to develop, but you firmly believed that was not the type of interest Tom had for you and you weren’t sure of your own feelings either. Your past love life was anything but shiny or even reciprocated at times, and you didn’t want your hope to grow only to end up hurting all on your own over situations you’d been one-sidedly reading too much into. The feeling that you might end up surrounded by cats and living an eternal single life was neither new nor far-fetched to you.
You reached your fingertips over the edge of the table absentmindedly, mostly to have something to do with your hands while you decided on how much to disclose. Rather than look at Linda, you inspected your nails and avoided eye contact when you finally answered, “Just making good on that plan of having dinner.”
She hummed a small sound of agreement and at the same time speculation. She didn’t say more at first, so you looked at her, but she was looking down pensively. She seemed to be considering her words very carefully, and you could almost pinpoint the moment she decided to drop part of her answer because she lifted her shoulders just slightly and finally returned your gaze. “When’s that going to be?”
You were momentarily puzzled by the absence of any comment on your answer, and the fleeting wonder of what exactly you were projecting at that moment to make her decide against what she wanted to say crossed your mind, but you set it aside and answered instead “Uhm... tomorrow night, actually.”
“Good!” She declared, then continued, matter-of-fact, “I’ll be over at six o’clock.”
You frowned. “In… the morning?” you asked her, confused.
“Of course not,” she explained, “I’m coming over before your date to do your makeup.”
“What?!” You laughed, thinking she was joking, “Nice one, Linda. Besides, it’s not a date.”
“I’m not joking.” She rebutted quickly, “I am coming over and doing your makeup because it is a date.”
You spluttered and shook your head, completely at loss. You moved your mouth to speak several times but nothing came out as you weren’t sure what you wanted to say. Finally, you responded, “There is absolutely no need for that, come on.” You looked at her inquisitively, still waiting for the punchline. When it didn’t come you continued, standing your ground, “It’s just a friendly dinner,” you enunciated slowly as if explaining a very simple concept to a toddler, “and even if it wasn’t, I wouldn’t need a professional makeup artist for a single night out.” You took a deep breath and firmly concluded, “You are not doing my makeup.”
“Ugh, fine!” She rolled her eyes and huffed out an irritated breath, “You never let me have fun!” she whined.
You chuckled, she spoke again, “I am still coming over, though.” she announced pointing her index finger at you.
You fell back in your chair with a sigh, this time it was your turn to roll your eyes. “Why?”
“Because,” she elongated the word, “You’ll definitely be freaking out, and I wanna veto your outfit.”
You crossed your arms in fake disdain, “I guess I just can’t win, can I.” You rolled your eyes again for effect and finally announced, “I give up, you can come.” She just smirked.
-
The next morning you were woken up by two things, one pleasant, the other a bit less so.
While lunch with your sister Amelia had eventually gone swimmingly, she’d gotten to your house a bit earlier than you’d been expecting her and she had found you still half-asleep and wearing pyjamas. You’d ended up finishing quite late the night before and had hoped that your lunch date could mean a few more hours of shut-eye, but that hadn’t been the case.
She had turned out to be a blessing, though, because she’d helped you do some errands around the house while you cooked for the two of you and the extra time together hadn’t been unwelcome either. Your schedules rarely managed to align, so having the time to catch up was a pleasant respite from running around from the label to the various interview locations and events. You were grateful for the success that had been granted to you, but sometimes family was the pause you needed to recalibrate your anxiety.
The second thing that had been expecting you when you awakened had been a text from Tom. He had sent it to confirm your date that same night, and he’d suggested you meet at a fairly new Thai restaurant that had been recommended to him by a friend. When he’d told you the address, you’d been surprised to discover that the place was just a few minutes from your house so you had agreed on meeting there around 7:30 PM.
Even though you’d ended up spending several hours together, and she’d seen you text Tom back, you’d managed to avoid the dinner date conversation with your sister and Tom hadn’t come up even once.
It had actually surprised you that she hadn’t mentioned him, you were pretty sure she was going to pester you about meeting him at the premiere - especially after your tweet - but she hadn’t at all. She’d been extremely engrossed complaining about her job and how her boss was expecting her to put in extra hours for no pay and you’d barely managed to get two words in. You hadn’t minded, though, your time together had been enjoyable and felt too brief, and not having to contribute much to the conversation wasn’t exactly a huge problem. It just meant more time to just listen and relax for you.
Amelia left around five in the afternoon after a call from Ben with the promise of keeping in contact more often - as she always promised - and a hug. You took advantage of the short hour that was left before Linda would be coming over to shower and choose an outfit for the night. You looked up the restaurant, called Mama Thai, and decided on casual clothing. You wanted to choose what to wear before Linda could make a hostile takeover of that too, and it didn’t take you very long to settle on a pair of charcoal grey pegged trousers and a soft black turtleneck. Finally, seen as the weather in London had gotten chilly all at once, you would definitely be topping the clothes with your trusted tan wool coat.
With that out of the way, you were still left with a half-hour window of time before Linda would be coming over. You decided to spend it just chilling on the sofa, fresh pyjamas on - it was still too early to get dressed - and some low music in the background.
The short break of time allowed you enough quiet to start thinking - maybe overthinking - about the night to come, and a small orb of anxiety started to form behind your sternum. You wondered about how it would go, you and Tom didn’t know each other all that well despite the numerous texts you had shared so far, and you were afraid that talking with each other face to face would prove too much of a challenge. What if no words came out of your mouth? You imagined an awkward dinner of two people who have nothing in common and that all that could pass between the two of you would be an incessant silence broken only by the grating noise of chewing.
All things considered, that could turn out to be the most positive outcome out of the worst ones. You could always end up fighting over a disagreement of views and start throwing plates at each other, getting thrown out of the restaurant and ultimately ending up on a gossip magazine.
Or you could get food poisoning and throw up all over his shoes before the end of the night, or… or… or…
Or maybe you simply needed to calm down and stop making up disastrous movie scenarios. You could have many insecurities, but your politeness was not something you often called into question and you were sure that if you either made a fool of yourself or he turned out to be the worst possible person - of which you were highly doubtful - the night would merely end with a polite goodbye and no promise of a future encounter.
And just as you’d managed to subdue the part of your mind that liked giving you unnecessary worries, your brain immediately conjured conspiracies of you being the only one who enjoyed the night and developing delusions of it being reciprocated. Right then, you really wished you’d learned to take things one step at a time at some point in your life.
Just as your imagination started making up Netflix romcom worthy plots, the intercom sounded. Thankful for the respite, you let out a sigh of relief and got up to let Linda in.
In the time it took her to get to your floor with the elevator, you turned down the music to a background tune and picked up a couple of throw pillows that had fallen from the couch to the floor. Then, you went to the kitchen and switched on the electric kettle filled with water, already knowing that Linda would enjoy a cup of tea. You had an entire cupboard just for tea, both bagged and loose, and most of the reason for that was Linda. You certainly enjoyed the beverage yourself, but ever since Linda had started coming to your house as a friend and not just a colleague, your collection had steadily grown into the impressive assortment it now was.
Soon enough, Linda ringed the doorbell. You went to open and she greeted you with a brief hug and an enthusiastic “Hi!”
You kissed her cheek and directed her to the small kitchen off the entrance, she placed her bag on the kitchenette island and divested herself of her coat, folding it across her arm.
“How are you doing, Lin?” you asked her, extending a hand so she could hand you the coat to hang in the closet next to the kitchen.
“I am so rested!” her voice followed you along the corridor, “I slept for almost ten hours non-stop.” You could hear the sound of a cupboard opening and of porcelain mugs softly hitting the countertop. Sure enough, when you got back you found her pouring the now heated water from the kettle to the mugs. She’d already chosen a tea for you, as she often did. She slid one of the mugs toward you and handed you a teaspoon.
“Ugh, lucky!” you groaned in response, “Amelia got here so early and had me doing chores right away. That woman is unstoppable.” She hummed in response, gently blowing on her tea, and took a sip. She let out a contented moan.
You tried your tea, she’d chosen a mint mix and you couldn’t help but ask her, “Oh, nice. Why’d you choose this one?”
“Because mint is a relaxant,” she explained briefly, “and I already know you’ve been overthinking this date.”
You harrumphed in disdain and lied, “No, I haven’t!”
She gave you an incredulous look and turned around, setting the mug down behind her. “Honey, honestly,” she started, opening her hands broadly in a placating motion, “I know you well enough by now, and I also know that you’re lying.”
You didn’t answer, preferring to hide what you could of your face behind your cup of tea and burning your tongue as a result. Linda had turned around again and was scooping up the tea bag out of her mug and placing it in a small dish you hadn’t noticed she’d gotten out.
When she faced you again, mug back in hand, you asked her, “Did you meet Paul earlier today?”
“Yes,” she replied, “He brought me coffee and croissants this morning.” She had a dreamy look in her eyes.
You smiled and looked into your tea, letting it swirl around the mug slightly. “He’s too sweet,” you told her.
“Don’t worry,” she answered quickly, “After the date tonight, I’m sure it won’t take you long to also score a boyfriend who brings you breakfast in the morning.” She smirked and sent you a wink. She downed the last of her tea and set the mug down behind her again, then clapped her hands resolutely and asked in quick succession, “So, what time are you meeting? Where are you going? And what are you wearing?”
You also finished your tea and walked to the sink, lowering your mug into it. You turned to Linda and gestured for her mug, she handed it to you with a “Thanks,” and you left it next to yours, reaching for the small dish with the teabag next and started, “Well,” you turned towards Linda again and leaned back onto the edge of the sink, answering, “We’re meeting around half past seven, at a small Thai restaurant not too far from here, and the clothes I’ve chosen are laid on the bed in my room.”
“Aw,” she whined, “You’re no fun, I wanted to help you choose!”
“Yes, I know,” you laughed, “That’s why I already did that.”
She rolled her eyes and crossed her arms in fake offence. Then, too curious to keep up the façade she said, “Alright, then, let’s see them.” And walked ahead of you towards your bedroom.
She eyed the clothes on the bedspread with careful consideration and picked up the sweater, flipping it back and forth and putting it down gingerly. “Are you wearing your tan coat over this?” she finally asked.
“Yep, but I’m open to disagreement,” you answered.
“No, no. This is nice,” she deliberated. “We absolutely need to get you into makeup now,” she announced, “It’s almost six thirty and I don’t wanna rush.”
You rolled your eyes and didn’t move. “I thought we’d agreed on no makeup, Lin.” You looked at your hands for a second, then to Linda, and hesitantly asked her “And anyway, are you sure about this?” She seemed confused so you continued, “It’s just a casual meeting, I don’t want you to go overboard, and maybe it would be better to go with no makeup at all, you know.” You paused, “I mean, I don’t want him to think I have ulterior motives and I don’t want to be overdressed, or I guess over-prepared in this case because what if-”
“I’ll go easy,” she stopped you before you could start rambling, “Just a soft, no makeup, makeup look. I promise.”
You nodded, still not entirely convinced but resigned to your fate, and inquired, “Where do you want me?”
“Living room,” she answered with no hesitation, “it’s got the best light. I just need to grab my bag from the kitchen, I brought all I need.”
You both moved to the living room; while she continued to the kitchen, you pulled out a small foldable chair you kept in the coat closet for when Nadia and Linda came over to prepare you for events. You opened it in front of the low coffee table where you knew the light would reach you best, but not directly, and sat down. It was almost routine, Linda had done that same action so many times before that you’d memorised the position too.
She reached you and propped her open bag on the coffee table. She then picked out a pair of small bottles and a foldable pouch that you knew contained her makeup brushes. Finally, she turned towards you, observing you for just a second, and got started.
You relaxed back into the chair, enjoying the delicate touch of the brushes on your skin and Linda’s soft humming of a foreign rhythm.
Relaxed as you were, you didn’t notice the time passing at all, so when Linda declared, “Perfect!” you jumped slightly, getting dragged out of your daze. You opened your eyes, she was offering you a compact mirror. You thanked her and took it, opening it up to observe the result of her work.
She had kept the promise of a soft makeup and to an inexpert eye it just seemed like you had flawless skin and enviably full eyebrows, but you could spot every difference from your bare face and you were truly impressed. It was a far cry from the looks you usually displayed at events, but no less impressive.
You handed the mirror back to Linda and thanked her again, “This is wonderful, Linda. Thank you so much for coming over.”
“Don’t mention it,” she brushed it off with a small wave of her hand, but you continued.
“I really mean it,” you insisted, “You were right, I was freaking out, and having you here really helped. So thank you.”
“You’re very welcome,” she replied, “Now, you need to get ready and go out there and have an amazing night, okay?”
You nodded and stood up, walking back to your bedroom with Linda in tow. Undressing in front of her had stopped bothering you a long time ago, seen as how often it happened, so you didn’t ask her to leave and quickly divested yourself. When you went to take out a brassière from your bedside table, you noticed it was almost 7:10 and the anxiety that had seemed to dwindle with Linda’s arrival came rushing back.
You took a deep breath and put the feeling aside, determined to get to the restaurant on time. Walking there would only take around ten minutes, so you still had enough time, but you got dressed quickly and picked out a bag, filling it with your wallet, keys, and phone. You would take your coat on the way out, as it was still in the coat closet with Linda’s.
You turned to her, ready to leave. She gave you a once-over and said, “You look wonderful! But not like you’re trying, put together but casual.” And then she nodded solemnly.
You chuckled, “Thanks, Linda, that’s what I was going for,” you grabbed your purse, then asked her, “Ready to go?”
“Yep,” she answered, and followed you to the entrance, picking up her bag from the coffee table in the living room while you got out both your coats, handing her hers and shouldering yours.
As soon as you exited the apartment, you fished your keys out of your bag and closed the door. You took the elevator down together and finally said your goodbyes.
Linda hugged you briefly and softly told you, “Good luck. Please, don’t freak out too much.”
“I’ll try,” you replied. You separated and she smiled at you. You smiled back, then you both turned away from each other and walked off in different directions, just as a cold wind started blowing, slightly messing up your hair. You hugged your coat closed tighter around you and picked up your pace, trying to keep unfortunate thoughts out of your mind.
Chapter 6
@honeybournehippy @namelesslosers @unlikelytigerqueen @effielumiere @theoneanna 
@huntersvibe: Tumblr won’t let me tag you, the reason for this might be that your blog is hidden from searches. You can switch it off in your blog settings, if you do and want me to try again, let me know!
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meggiebrick · 6 years
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I was tagged by @swishandflickwit, yay! But this is hard to read because the questions won't bold. And now I have to go make lunch for my gremlins, so I can't tag anyone. So if you're reading this, consider yourself tagged, cause I want to know ALL OF YOU
1. Have you ever been in love? Yes :) I've been letting this one guy hang around for the past 15 years and we're married and stuff, and I still like him almost all of the time, so I THINK I'll keep letting him hang around. :)
2. Who is your favorite artist? My uncle Mike. He truly is a wonderful artist, but I think I like his work the most because he paints things and people and places I know and love.
3. What is your favorite music genre? That's impossible to choose! I truly like everything depending on my mood. Except for screaming death metal.
4. Have you ever had a penpal? You know, I think I did! In like 2nd grade or something.
5. Are you single or in a relationship? I'm extremely married.
6. What is your favorite word? Serendipity
7. What color are your eyes? Blue
8. Do you play any instruments? No but I SO wish I did. But I have spatial issues due to dyscalculia and I have pretty much zero rhythm.
9. What is your favorite color? Purple.
10. Do you have any nicknames? Nothing exciting. Megs, Meggie, etc.
11. what is your favorite flower? Lilacs
12. what qualities do you find attractive in a person? Ugh, I hate it sometimes but I'm a sucker for the quiet brooding type. It honestly makes my life difficult but it is what it is. I blame early exposure to Mr. Darcy.
13. Do you have any pets? A dog, a bearded dragon, and 4 guinea pigs.
14. Have you ever traveled outside of your home country? Just to Canada
15. What language(s) do you speak? Just English. American and British ;)
16. Who was your first crush? I think a boy named John in kindergarten
17. What is your favorite pastry? Anything gluten free :(
18. Do you wear glasses? Contacts
19. Do you prefer swimming in a pool or in the ocean? Lakes, but of those two I guess I'd pick the ocean. I hate pools.
20. What is your favorite social media app? Ooooh probably Twitter? But maybe that's because I don't have one right now and I miss it. I had to delete it because of a creeper and it was this whole THING and now I'm locked out for a week or so. Dumb.
21. What is your sexuality? Jason Beghe's voice
22. Bright, dark, or pastel colors? It really depends! I guess, gun to my head, I would pick bright?
23. Do you have any siblings? One older brother
24. What is your favorite scent? Lilac. But I love mint too, especially mixed with rosemary. Or, ooh, the smell of my husband in a white t-shirt just out of the laundry.
25. Where do you want to travel to? Everywhere. Anywhere!
26. What is your favorite film? So, so many. But if I have to pick, Manchester by the Sea. I don't know why.
27. Who do people say you look like? Most often Pauley Perrette.
28. Who is your best friend? She doesn't have Tumblr, but we've been BFF since we were eight. She lives a thousand miles away now and sometimes we still cry because we miss each other, even though it's been over five years since she moved.
29. What is your dream job? To be an author. That's always been the dream. Maybe someday! For the first time in about a decade, I feel like I can do it again.
30. Do you know how to drive? I honestly don't! So embarrassing, since where I live most people my age have been driving for twenty years. It's those pesky spatial issues again :/ I'm hoping with visual therapy to strengthen those skills I'll be able to someday.
31. Who is/was your favorite teacher? Two of my English teachers in high school. Oddly, they were both named James. One liked me a lot, and I liked him a lot. One really didn't like me at all, and it was mutual. However I respected them both a great deal, and the one who didn't like me once told me I was the most talented writer he'd ever had. It meant so, so much to me because I could tell he didn't even want to say it.
32. Are you a feminist? Who isn't?!
32. What is your zodiac sign? Taurus. And I'm SUCH a Taurus tbh.
33. Do you enjoy reading? I am so in love with it.
34. Do you have any hidden talents? I am strangely good at trivia. In person I come off as very flakey and bubbly and ditzy, so it's funny when random knowledge comes into play. It really surprises people. One of my friends calls it my "sneak attack, motherfuckers, I'm a genius" move. LOL! I'm not, though, I just remember large amounts of BS. It's not useful in any way.
35. Have you ever dyed your hair? Too many times to count.
36. what is your favorite thing in your bedroom? The silence! And all my pillows.
37. Can you whistle? Not like, a tune. But I can get someone's attention or call a dog.
38. What is your biggest fear? Burning to death. Or, of course, bad things happening to the people I love.
39. Do you make your bed every day? No. It's about 50/50.
40. Do you have any tattoos and/or piercings? Ears, but I haven't worn earrings in years. I want so many tattoos but I'm a big baby.
41. Have you ever been on a roller coaster? Yes, a surprising amount considering I don't like them much!
42. surfing or skateboarding? I can't do either but I'd love to be able to surf.
43. Are you a dog or a cat person? Dogs! Love em. Cats are okay too, but I don't like them as much.
44. what is your favorite animal? Giraffes, seahorses, dogs, guinea pigs...
45. Do you have a skincare routine? No but I should
46. What time do you typically go to bed at and what time do you wake up at? Ugh, I am TERRIBLE. I'm naturally a night owl, like it is TORTUROUS to me to be woken early. Ideally I'd go to sleep around 6 in the morning and wake up at 2 p.m. As is I usually go to sleep anywhere from 1 to 4 a.m. and wake up anywhere from 7 a.m. to 1 p.m. depending on everyone's schedule for the day. It's SO bad and I really need to get better, but it's so unnatural for me to sleep at night. My body actively fights it and always has. I'm trying to retrain myself to just go to sleep when it's still p.m. at night, but it's not going well.
47. what is your favorite memory? I have so many. Of course the important ones involving my husband and kids, but I love when my best friends and I are just sitting around and we'll say "remember that time..." and then a few minutes later we're laughing hysterically.
48. What is the best gift you’ve ever received? When my family and I were really struggling, I didn't want to talk about it much. But somehow a group of women I've never met (but have talked to for years on Facebook) realized what was going on and sent us $300. It paid some bills and the rest went on groceries but knowing that they cared... I'll never, ever forget that.
49. How tall are you? 5'7"
50. Do you have a garden? In the American sense, like a bed of flowers or vegetables, no. In the English sense, like a yard, yes. A big one.
51. Do you like bugs? Some! I HATE mosquitoes and wasps though.
52. What is your natural hair color? Dark (ish) brown.
53. What is your favorite food and drink? Any form of potatoes and... Hmm... Diet Coke or cranberry juice. Or really really cold water with crushed ice.
54. Do you want kids? no, how do you think I should tell the three I already have?! LOL. Yes. I've always wanted them, impossible though they are. I think I'd like two more, but we'll see.
55. What is/was your favorite class? English. I loved Native American studies in college, too.
56. what color shirt are you wearing? Green.
57. If you could time travel, what year would you go to and why? I don't know. I used to always want to go back to James Herriot era England but the war would have been so sad and hard. I think we romanticize it now, but it wouldn't have been good. Still, though, I think I'd like it. Or I'd relive the 90s again. We didn't know how good we had it.
58. What is your skin color? Peach, I guess. I'm pretty pale in the winter and tan up in the summer even though I try to remember sun block.
59. Hugs or kisses? Both
60. Have you ever drank alcohol? AbsoLUTELY
61. netflix or youtube? Ooh that's tough! Um....i can't choose!
62. Have you ever done drugs? Just pot
63. Ice cream or frozen yogurt? Ice cream. I wish I had some now.
64. Succulents or flowers? Flowers!
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thechampagnelovers · 3 years
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Wayhayy I am back! It took me a bit longer, I actually tried studying yesterday and today I was at the dentist and that sucked big time and I had some late lectures so I am back a bit later than intended. It‘s 8 p.m. here now and I am still in a lecture but I just can‘t concentrate so I thought I‘d take some time to answer. :) I usually don‘t sleep very well or very healthy and I especially don‘t have a pattern, whoops. I think when I last wrote it was around 11 p.m. which isn‘t crazy late to me but it could also be I might write you when it is around 4 a.m. here. I tell you, Insomnia sucks. 😅
Did you have time for yoga today? I stretched a bit and went for a walk and my back is happy about it for sure!
I still googled the crocs hahaha and I liked the blue ones with white and red too! But I think I will stick to one colour first, get back into the flow. 😂 I mean summers is still a long way to go, so I have plenty of time to pic out outfits that will rock. I agree on the shorts tho! Crocs and shorts are a match made in heaven!
Okay it really sucks that books are expensive? I mean this is probably a dumb question but is there a certain reason why? If it is good I will find a way to send my copy to you!! 💆🏾‍♀️
I hope you enjoy your book. 🥺 is it non-fiction?
Thank you for all the recs!! I am genuinely an idiot for not thinking about the fact that these are established authors that probably have their works translated when I typed out that ask agsjskl! Funnily enough when I was younger I did read Isabel Allende. I read the book series the city of the beasts! I think I read book one and had the others on cd or something like that. It was really good! I will get back to you on those when I am done with rwrb but I screenshotted everything. Same goes for the fic recs! I will definitely come back to report what I read and how I liked it!
Did you have time for the snippets or the album trailer? If yes, what do you think? I think I will fall in love with River Road especially after I heard it in the Album trailer. 🥺 Ahh I am excited for the album! But I didn‘t really hear an upbeat sound so I guess we will have to wait for the whole songs to come out to be sure. 👀
At this point I have to scroll between all the asks we send so I don‘t forget a point haha sorry if this all messy I am also a bit tired (I was up til 5 a.m.). If I do forget something you what me to still answer please tell meeee! Hope you had a good day. x
hi nony <3 i’m happy to see u again 
i’m so sorry to hear about your insomnia :( i totally get it, but rn it’s winter for you and you’re back in lockdown so don’t even bother to “fix” it becuase it’s not worth it lol, we’ve all been there too. just give yourself time, try to rest as much as you can and your body will slowly readjust, specially when winter is over. my sleeping schedules has always been all over the place but lately i’ve been waking up with sunlight bc it gives me a few hours where i can be completely alone and in peace i just m*asturbate but i appreciate it a lot when people don’t bother me lol
I just finished doing yoga when i saw this ask! i didn’t do a headstand today tho, but i’m noticing i’m slowly getting a little better at this routine i’m doing. it’s a little hard but i love it. I just wish i could remember to do the headstand! now my body cooled off so i can’t do it :/ i love to hear your back is happy <3 mine is too lol
the reason why are books so expensive is the ✨economic crisis✨ my dear friend. although the economy has more of less been constant, from 2015 to 2019 everything went down and just everything in general got so expensive lol and that’s on neoliberalism 😌 in reality, books are not that much expensive but for people who like reading and buy many books on a regular basis, it’s a lot of money, but i’ve been shopping a lot in second hand book stores and facebook marketplace is a heaven, a curse but also a heaven (i had to delete the facebook app at one point because i couldn’t stop buying books) so i guess it’s alright. and pleaseee !!! don’t worry love, you’re so nice <3
the book is fictional, although i’m reading it kinda slowly bc rn i’m hooked up on a writing rush (and the book is kinda ✨sexist✨ but i’m hoping it’s going to get somewhere, ugh remind me to never read anything by a white men again)
ohhh i haven’t read la ciudad de las bestias but it sounds so good! and i’ll love to hear your opinions soon <3
i just heard the album trailer and omg!!!! i’m claiming river road rn!!! it’s SO GOOD, i have a feeling it’s gonna be a fan favourite (and it’s a ziall song, i know it). tbh they all sound so good, really chill tho, not much upbeat so far but it’s okay because zayn does it sooooo good, he can sing anything tbh (also i love the fact that we both have the same fav songs fdjksfjkl you should drop your fav songs from ot5 and we can compare) 
don’t worry about answering everything! this love letters are already too long lmao. go get some sleep!!! gn love <3
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groundsnow · 3 years
Text
イツカ
I gotta act normally. Prof. Matsui specifically instructed me to keep watch on Aki without letting her suspect me.
"Remember, Horikawa, you need to get close to her as much as possible, but don't let her or anyone suspect your actions. The Cirql System is determined to keep this a secret from the general public. Only the concerned authorities are aware of our operations. You can think of yourself as Masuda's bodyguard, keeping watch 24/7. Do anything you deem appropriate to accomplish this task as long as you uphold the principles of Cirql."
Anything? So, basically, it's up to me to handle this case? That is, as long as no one discovers about the secret society... and Aki's true identity. I'll get creative then, I guess. I look at my wristwatch— it's 9:48 pm! Damn, I can't be late. It's going to be another violation. The dormitory's curfew is at 10 pm. I'll definitely make it before 10!
I run as quickly as I can. Recently, I noticed that my endurance has improved. The trainings must have really paid off! I'm about the enter the gate now. It's 9:53 pm. Well, that was fast. Whew!
I put in the key and turn the knob. I open the door and see that Aki is still awake, sitting in front of her desk and facing her laptop. She's probably studying. I enter the room and put my stuff on the desk.
"Yo, Aki" I greet her with a two-finger salute.
"Hello, Horikawa." She waves at me.
"Busy, huh. Studying again?" I ask.
"Yes, we're gonna have a quiz on Thursday. She says.
"You know, Aki, you don't have to speak so formally to me." I say. She looks so startled.
"O-okay, Sena." Am I actually intimidating her? She can't even say it loud enough.
"Right. From now on just call me by my first name. " I say cheerfully. She looks surprised then laughs.
"Okay." She looks embarrassed by what I just said. Maybe she's just really shy.
"By the way, Aki, I have a question." She looks at me intently, her eyes not blinking.
"Eh? What is it?" Her face looks surprised. She's too easy to read! If someone wanted to pull a prank on her, I'm sure she'd fall for it easily. But I won't do that, ever. Not to an innocent and gullible person like her. Sorry, Aki, but I have to do this. Please forgive me! I run my fingers through my hair, then look her in the eyes.
"Can you stop being timid? Seriously, it's stupid. Don't waste your potential by being a nerd who avoids people. You shut-in." It's mean, I know. But this is the fastest way to know if she has DID too. Silence fills the room, and she's still staring at me. She doesn't blink or move at all. I move closer and wave my hand in front of her.
"Hey idiot?" She slowly turns her back on me. I guess I have my answer now. I hear a loud, manic laughter, which startles me. She slowly turns to face me again, this time her eyes turn blue. Okay, now that's unexpected. Is this part of the gene mutation too?
"HAHAHAHAHAHA IDIOT? YOU MUST BE SO FULL OF YOURSELF. YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW WHO YOU'RE TALKING TO." Whoa dude that 180° change to a totally different personality. She's still laughing manically. She really has MGID, plus DID. I just confirmed my theory. The aggressive personality is triggered when she's faced with a potential threat. Her facial expression, voice, and overall aura are completely different. She's turned into someone else.
"Who are you then?" I respond, trying to find out how the other persona reacts.
"HA. YOU WANNA PLAY A GAME, HUH?" She smirks then grabs the closest thing she can reach then throws it at me. I quickly dodge it. She's finally gotten violent. She throws a punch at me, which I dodge again. She laughs while attacking me. I catch her fist and try to stop her. She's surprisingly strong despite looking so petite and weak.
"Tell me who you are." I ask her, now holding her fists to prevent her from punching me.
"NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS, IDIOT!" She twists her arms, causing me to lose grip of her. She attempts to kick my abdomen, but I quickly dodge. Is she actually trained in martial arts? I don't want to hurt her so I've taken a defensive stance all this time.
"What are you doing?" I ask again.
"YOU'RE ANNOYING!" Yikes. I never thought the other personality would be this violent. She continues to throw punches and kicks at me, all of which I either dodge or block with my arms. I grab her arms then pin her against the wall. Her sharp gaze pierces through me. I suddenly feel something hard on my stomach, forcing me to fall on the ground. Right. She just used the one-inch punch on me. It hurts. I can't help but cough. She's about to throw me a punch. Running out of options, I grab a needle pen from my pocket then stab her left thigh. She still gets to hit my left jaw though. A few seconds later, she loses consciousness. I catch her just before she hits the ground. Phew. That was tiring. If only I fought back, I wouldn't have been hit. I just chose not to injure her. I'm now carrying her to her bed, my arms supporting her back and the back of her knees. She's so light that I don't feel like I'm carrying a person. I'm glad the tranquilizers worked on her. She'll wake up soon.
I sit on my bed, still watching her. I'm now feeling the injuries I sustained earlier. My left jaw is lightly bruised, and my abdomen still hurts. I stand up to get some ice cubes from the refrigerator for cold compress. Now sitting on my bed, I can't help but look at her who is sleeping peacefully. I can't believe that I'm looking at a 16-year-old, because she honestly looks like a 12-year-old kid. Her face is too young-looking, and she looks so innocent, which is too different from the other persona earlier. I've proven that she indeed has DID apart from MGID, and how the violent persona is triggered, but I can't let Cirql know about it, or else I'm doomed. Prof. Matsui would surely scold me for being reckless.
I put down the cold compress bag on my desk, realizing that I haven't changed clothes yet. I quickly grab a t-shirt and a pajama so I could rest on my bed. I'm lying down, facing the ceiling. Ugh. Still can't sleep. I'm wondering why her violent persona was triggered when I told her to stop being timid. She was probably bullied in the past. I face sideways, now facing her. She sleeps in a fetal position, which makes her look cuter. She's almost like a kitten. I let out a sigh. Well, at least, I have some leads now in handling this case. I've uncovered some clues on her identity. I hope everything goes well.
I check the time — it's 4:36 am and I still haven't had a wink of sleep. Damn. I keep tossing and turning. I'm thinking about what happened earlier. I specifically thought of asking that question, because I somehow knew that she'll react to it strongly. We haven't talked a lot, but my intuition tells me that it'll cause internal conflicts for her, hence an ideal trigger. I suddenly feel guilty for doing that to her, still, it's the only way to know. I'll take responsibility for this, and won't let anyone know about the reckless move I made to confirm my theories.
Looks like I won't be able to sleep at all. It's 4:50 am and I have a 7 am class. I'm not even sleepy. I get up and gather my toiletries before going to the shower. If I keep lying on my bed, I might fall asleep eventually and miss my class.
It's now 6:00 am, and I've finished preparing. She's still sound asleep. I check her class schedule on her desk. She has an 8:30 am class. Should I wake her up now? It might be too early though. Aight, I'll just stay here until it's 6:45 am so she can sleep for 45 minutes more. It's like making up for what I did last night too.
Her phone rings, and for some reason, I get curious who sent her a message. Her screen's locked, but notifications and details are still visible.
Hiromi Horikawa
Hi Aki! :)
What the hell? Why is that bastard chatting her? Seriously, what is he up to? Does he know that she's a case?
I grab my phone from my pocket. I gotta text someone. I search the bastard on Telegram.
Annoying Bastard
Sena: Do you know Aki?
Hiromi: Yeah, we're blocmates. Why?
Sena: Stop talking to her.
Hiromi: Why should I listen to you?
Sena: Because I'm the sentinel assigned to her. Get away from her.
Hiromi: What? Since when did she become a case?
Sena: Haven't you heard from Prof. Matsui at all?
Hiromi: No. I don't understand what you're saying.
Sena: Idiot. You don't attend meetings, that's why. Talk to Prof. Matsui then.
Hiromi: You know that I've filed a request for inactivity. I need to focus on my studies.
Sena: Focus on your studies, and yet you've chosen to abandon the most important duty bestowed on us. Nice. Just talk to Prof. Matsui. And don't get near Aki again, or I'll personally report you to Cirql. I'll be destroying this convo now.
Hiromi is typing...
I tap the "delete conversation" button so that there's no trace for both us. I can't risk that bastard doing something stupid.
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tnaypi3 · 4 years
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Delhi & Jaipur
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View from our hotel balcony
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Got a few hours sleep but we are ready for your surprises, New Delhi!
We had quite an intro upon arrival at the airport the night before. As expected, we got flocked by so many cab drivers. We nicely told them we have a ride even though we didn’t. They can be pretty relentless and even if you’ve already refused them, they don’t leave you alone. We were buying time to figure out if we should get an Uber, as sometimes, that tends to get tricky when you’re at an airport. Or if we should take the airport shuttle, though that is surely going to be 5x the going rate. Or maybe we get lucky and find a driver we can negotiate with. 
After talking to the booth for airport shuttles/services and finding out their rate was 1500 Rs, Alex and I decided we go look for a driver that would agree with 850 Rs plus tip. We found one and in no time we were following him to his cab which was not really a cab. It was a small mini van, half of it in the back a storage area. A buddy of his then approached the passenger seat to join us on our ride. My imagination did not go wild or anything but I did not like how things are looking. I took a photo of his plate number (tip from the internet and I also usually do this when in an unfamiliar place). 
They saw this and got really upset, asking why I did that. I said I’m sending it to my parents as a safety measure and to our hotel in case we leave something or if we’ll need anything from you for future purposes. They were not having it and demanded I delete it. 
I said “Okay, no problem, ( I wanted to add ‘no need to be this agitated, JEEZE’) but we’re not riding with you.”
As we were unloading our luggages, the driver wouldn’t give it a rest, telling me how wrong I was, that I was a bad person, etc. (LOL.) He asked if I deleted it so I showed him my photo gallery and that it was already gone. I say sorry to him if I offended him or anything, and that I just wanted to be cautious, that everything is new to us here and we’re just trying to do the smart thing, and if he’s not okay with that, we’re not here to pressure him with what we want. He seemed to understand what I said and calmed down. We walked away still hearing them say we are not good people. 
Shortly after that, we found another booth, a private car service, paid under 1000 Rs and were good to go. I asked the person behind the desk as well as our driver before getting in the car if it’s okay to take a picture of the plate number and was allowed without any fuss. We were dropped off to our hotel in 30mins, at almost 2am. 
Not too bad ;-)
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What a beautiful, sunshiney, smoggy, loud and lively morning India!
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Our cute and quirky hotel that is conveniently situated in walking distance to the Old Delhi railway station which we’ll be taking on day2 going to Jaipur
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Lookin for breakfast
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Found one! And it was love at first bite for Alex!!!
I only had toast because I was still feeling a bit unsettled from eating way too much during our flights. We pre-ordered vegetarian/vegan meals. It was the best decision ever!
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Hmm. Cows and horses competing with humans, rickshaws, cabs and trucks on the streets.. Okay, I’m starting to get it. It really is a thing here!
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Hi little goat friends!
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The Red Fort
Red Fort, also called Lal Qalʿah, Mughal fort in Old Delhi, India was built by Shah Jahān in the mid-17th century and remains a major tourist attraction. The fort was designated a UNESCO World Heritage site in 2007.
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Every year on the Independence day of India, the Prime Minister hoists the Indian "tricolour flag" at the main gate of the fort and delivers a nationally broadcast speech from its embankment.
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Rang Mahal
This palace was used by consorts of emperors and their maids. Khas Mahal, the stunning personal palace of emperor, is situated near Rang Mahal. It allowed the emperor to pay a visit to his queens anytime he wants. Except the princesses and queens, nobody had the permission to visit Khas Mahal.
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With the end of Mughal Reign (1858), the British officials sanctioned to remove all the valuables from Red Fort and destroyed many buildings inside as well as  the gardens and reduced it to just a military structure.
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After having acquired the Red Fort, British went on a destroying spree. They continued to demolish several parts of the fort. Most of the valuables were sold. Nothing much remained in the massive and splendid fort that was once the residence of the mughal emperor.
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Cab ride views
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Akshardham Temple
Built of pink sandstone and marble, the mandir which is a place where Hindus go to worship gods in the form of various deities, is the spiritual center of the entire complex. The murtis (a general term for a cult image, an image, statue or idol of a deity or person in Indian culture) of Bhagwan Swaminarayan and his successors, reside in this intricately carved abode. Strengthening the faith of believers, blessing all aspirants and bringing peace to everyone, the Akshardham Mandir is a temple that welcomes all.  
Phones and cameras are not allowed so the images of this part of our day are all borrowed from the internet ;-) It was a surprisingly nice time without our devices for a good few hours. Though I’m ashamed to say, I almost threw a fit upon finding out about the house rules earlier. Alex joked there better be a super top-secret show or ritual or religious artifacts and Indian gems or treasures inside for us to go though all the security machines and pat downs. haha! 
There wasn’t! But we were engulfed anyway by the beauty of its architecture, carvings, paintings, watching pilgrims observe prayers and rituals which overall set a serenely devotional mood, almost making you feel like you’re watching a movie.
Okay. Definitely a way, way better experience without our phones!!
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Akshardham Temple is surrounded by Narayan Sarovar, which is a lake and carries water from 151 lakes in India. There are 108 faces of cows placed along the lakes which represent 108 Hindu deities. It has a 3,000-feet-long orbital path for Parikrama made up of red stones brought from Rajasthan. It also has a two storey building, with 1,152 pillars and 145 windows. This Parikrama is spread around the temple like a beautiful garland. 
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There is also an exquisite garden in the Akshardham temple complex in the shape of lotus and therefore is also, known as the Lotus Garden. When seen from above, it looks like a Lotus made up of large stones where quotes from Shakespeare, Martin Luther, Swami Vivekananda and other eminent figures are engraved. It’s a nice little have from the chaos of the city outside.
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Lodi Gardens
A historic park spread across more than 90 acres in the heart of New Delhi is the Lodi/Lodhi Gardens. The park just does not have trees, plants, flowers and green lawns, but also is home to some historical monuments and tombs which were built during the 15th and 16th centuries. 
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Spent the afternoon spying on so many species of exotic birds! Well, exotic for Alex and I. There were birds that resembled turkeys, storks/herons.. birds of all sizes, countless flocks of green parrots with the romantic Delhi sunset as a.backdrop... It was magical!
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Thankful for this patch of green to hide in and take a break from all the loud honking of vehicles and the blanket of smog/dust all throughout the city
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Caught a show at the Indian Habitat Cultural Center. Definitely a highlight because it was my first time to see anything like this - Kerala traditional folk dance with live music accompaniment! What a stunning show, and a good night cap to end our first day in Delhi. Sadly, halfway through, we couldn’t keep our eyes open anymore so we snuck out during the break to head home :-\
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Train to Jaipur - whew!
This is a story we’ll never forget! Our train was scheduled to leave 6:05am and yay, according to my vast(ish) research, it’s always on time. Supposedly a 4hr ride, so shortly after 10am we’ll be in Jaipur. Awesome! This made me so happy because this means we have the whole day to explore the city.
We woke up 5:20am and were stepping out of our hotel by 5:10. We walked to the train station and arrived roughly 10mins later. This is when it gets tricky. The station was already bustling with passengers, drivers, people selling tickets and whatnots. We couldn’t find any sign in English that would direct us where to fall in line or what to do first. For a moment, we were scampering  back and forth looking for a sign, someone that talks in English - anything! None. So we turned to our intuition and counted on our gut feeling to join the people falling in line. Which was getting longer by the second. It looked like it leads to an xray machine for the luggages. I asked the people in front of us and behind us if this is the line to Jaipur/is this the line for the train Ajmer Shatabdi Express but I got mixed answers. Needless to say, there’s an air of panic between Alex and I because we couldn’t afford to waste any time. While Alex is in line, I walked around to look for someone to ask and I find this guy who probably works in the station because he looked the part. Thankfully, he also speaks English. I asked him if we are in the right line and told him we’re going to Jaipur. He said it’s not the line we’re supposed to be at, and hastily ushered us to another direction. Alex and I, while following him, looked at each other, suspicion already starting to set in. While we’re brisk walking, the guy asks us if we already have tickets and I said yes, pulling out the prints from my bag. He encircled the departure time in our ticket saying that our train is cancelled but there’s another option. I stop in my tracks dumfounded.
Only because I know this guy is a scam and he is actually scamming us right now. UGH. I have read countless blogs and articles online regarding THIS  PARTICULAR SCENARIO. So I told him “No. It’s not cancelled but nice try.” and turned away from him to go back where we left off in the line. The man behind us was kind enough to let us.
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Getting inside the station, again, we couldn’t find any sign in the platform that would at least say the train’s name or the destination. I was starting to really get nervous about missing our train. Several people that we asked couldn’t understand what we were saying. Finally we decided we found our train and walked all the way to the front of the platform since we were assigned to car #2. After we’ve placed our luggage in the overhead storage and found our seat numbers, we plopped down and smiled at each other. PHEW. But for whatever reason, I get up to ask the person sitting behind us if this train is going to Jaipur. He and some others then tells us we’re on the wrong train. LOL. This train is not going to Jaipur!!! I wanted to cry and laugh and cry. We thank them and in less than a minute, we were back on the platform running around like headless chickens.
To cut it short, we did find our train 10mins or so before departure. I was starting to understand that even though we have done our homework and researched most of the things, this trip is going to be navigated through a push and pull of intuition, asking more than 3 persons for confirmation who are hopefully not out to scam foreigners, maybe a little help from our angels and fairies, good luck, a lot of patience, and a positively persistent mindset. Good morning India!!!!
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Another hell of a ride here. We get to Jaipur Railway Station and had 3 Uber drivers cancel on us. Not sure why it was so hard for us to find each other but it just never worked out. But we wanted to keep trying because it was so much easier since the payment is online. The other option which is getting a cab is too exhausting at times as it seems like you’re just constantly dealing with drivers who are trying to take advantage of you 
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Made it to our hotel! 
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We are super happy to have survived this morning (without punching anyone in the face, especially for me!!!)
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Rooftop pool
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And restaurant!
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Oh gosh, the food just keeps getting better. A very quick and satisfying mini feast before we head off to our 2pm appointment with our cab driver, Hassan who’s picking us up at our hotel. He saved us me from disintegrating of frustration at Jaipur railway station without ripping us off “too much” after all our Uber mishaps. 
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Albert Hall Museum
Named after Prince Albert of Wales, it is also the oldest museum of the state and functions as the state museum of Rajasthan.
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The magnificent building is visible from outside New Gate. The building is made up of Stone blocks prominent in British Architecture of that time. The main building is on a a plinth to support weight of the huge building.
When you’re reading descriptions wherein I’m using funny words, you may think I’m also borrowing these from the internet. And you are absolutely right! Plinth. Hahaha!
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This was also beginning to be a theme. On our first day in Delhi, Alex got a handful fans here and there asking for a selfie. LOL!
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Just inside the Building are courtyards with water fountains, floors paved with polished, symmetric marble.
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Back in the cab
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Monkeys! It has begun...... ;) 
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Entering the very underrated Monkey Temple/ Galta Ji
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Right away, you just get this mysterious, almost mystical feeling as you make your way into the cobblestone path that wraps around hills, eventually leading you to the temple. It could be that the unique and absolutely magnificent Rajasthan sunrise with hues of orange, pink and sepia is to blame for. Or maybe because suddenly, things simply seems to have slowed down significantly with no one trying to sell us anything or pushing tour packages down our throats.. and then there’s the blaring of horns that begin to slowly fade away the farther up we go...
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Alex and I were insanely overwhelmed with the amount of monkeys roaming around freely. For a moment I found my head throbbing from my heart beating so fast while trying to absorb everything that’s happening. Everything was happening all at once and I wanted to see it all, I didn’t want to miss anything!! Everything was straight out from a movie or a story book. Barely any tourists, the locals were as nonchalant as could be and there are stray monkeys, goats, cows and dogs meandering everywhere you go
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A heartwarming moment seeing this guy with his kid drive up to where most of the monkeys were hanging out to giving out bananas, so much bananas that it seemed like every monkey was able to get one :) What a sight! And a cacophony of squeals and yelps as a whole troop of them tumbles from a nearby tree, and rocks, scuttling across the path like a group of scrumping children!!
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My husband is a celebrity ;-)
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Hemmed inside a narrow gorge, squeezed between cliffs in a rocky valley, Galta Ji feels like a desolate place. We barely see any people, especially not other camera-wielding tourists on our ascend.
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Falling in love with Jaipur’s colors
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A slice of Jaipur city views
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My favorite smile under the Rajasthani sunset
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Looks like we just missed a music session with kids!
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The Sun temple / Surya Mandir
A small Hindu temple dedicated to the sun god that lies high above Jaipur and provides wonderful panoramic views over the city.
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We were offered a prayer in exchange for donations by the lady that was watching over the temple 
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Can you tell how satisfied we are of how everything is going so far?
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The buildings with walls cracked and peeling seem to tumble down into the valley set between two granite cliffs and descending in steps. Maybe that’s why I find it so evocative and alluring.
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We were at a turtle’s pace the for more than two hours and by then, we decided we can skip the rest of the trek to the Monkey Temple. We’ve had our fill of monkey-watching and neighborhood exploration and are ready for the next destination. We also didn’t want to make our driver wait any longer so we made our way down. The panoramic view of the city, now even more taken over by the changing colors of sunset.
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Our driver had a long spiel about an area that sells textiles, wooden crafts, trinkets, all made by hand and many more other thingamabobs such as incense, spices and whatnots.. Also, as a strong selling point, he kept emphasizing that these merchants help the very poor population by providing work for them, donating to charities that take care of street children, etc.
In the spirit of give and take, we let him take us there. So far, he’s been a jolly and helpful driver after all, playing the part of our tour guide here and there. A little pushy and overly energetic at times but it’s all good!
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Seeing how cotton sarongs, sari’s, tapestries, blankets, shawls achieve their unique burst of colors and prints. By hand! By layers of 4 and more print-stamping process!
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Felt like I was robbed. But make that happily robbed because I managed to find extremely pretty pieces and haggled good! Everyone is happy, including our driver who also got a commission for bringing us there. 
This is one of the things I absolutely love about traveling. More so in poorer places because we get to share our blessings in our own little way to the hardworking locals who hustle nonstop to take care of their families and sometimes, extended families.
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Back in the hotel! There’s never been a meal we didn’t look forward to on this trip. 
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Yes, we gobbled everything so fast. Faster than I could take out my camera and steal a snap.
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