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hope-you-brought-kneepads-bitch · 2 years

Text

Smashing Bottles

Fandoms: Heathers X Marvel

words: 3,856

warnings: drugs, sexual tension/innuendos, lesbians (jk) let me know if I miss anything

Summary: Heathers and Marvel characters at college, Heather is just trying to enjoy a stupid party but Tony Stark is trying to ruin it, she also meets new girl Veronica the marvel people are the same just at college because I say so and of course Heather is a demon because I still love demon Chandler, this is purely self indulgent but I enjoyed writing it and hope you do too.

A/N: will I ever stop writing ridiculous crossovers that nobody asked for? Never!

Demon Chandler moved across the suspiciously sticky floor and stood over the bodies lay passed out on the floor “I’ve been on this stupid plane of existence for years and yet college parties are still the most disgusting things I’ve ever been too” she whispered to no on in particular

She took a bottle of beer off one of the drunken messes on the couch and took a swig passing it the boy trailing behind her “you know I don’t drink much” JD declined and Heather just shrugged “still a boring bitch then” she finished of the bottle throwing it to the hardwood floor and laughed when she heard it smash

“Hey! What the hell?” Heather spun around to the voice and only saw red hair through the dim lights “what’s up with you red?”

“You can’t go around smashing bottles!” Heather laughed at the red heads angry tone “we’re at a frat party little girl broken glass is the last thing you need to worry about”. As she went to walk away Heather felt something or someone, try to get into her head, shaking her head she turned back around to the woman and stood close to her now seeing who she was talking too “ohh if it isn’t the young scarlet witch, did you have fun trying to read my mind? I’d stop before you find something dangerous…” Heather was cut off by a hand gripping her hair and dragging her back

“Touch my girlfriend again and I’ll make sure yo-“ JD swiftly pulled the girl off of Heather and to the ground baring his fangs and growling “you don’t want to finish that sentence!”

Quickly a small group had gathered the four and Heather moved away from the girl she knew as Wanda “alright everyone let’s just calm down” she looked down on the ground at the person JD was glaring at “well hey there Nat, sorry about my guard dog he’s a little fiery when someone attacks his friend” she looked around at the small circle and saw Tony, Bruce, carol, Maria and Steve “great, the little protection squad is here” she held out her hand for Nat who begrudgingly accepted and pushed her to Wanda “I’m not in the mood to play with any of you tonight and certainly not the guys so how about we call this a night?”

Tony suddenly got in Heather's face making the blonde chuckle "you're getting brave stark, blowing the coach to keep you on the team finally gave you a bit of false confidence?"

"Says the one sleeping with nearly every female teacher here" he retorted and his friends laughed while Heather just rolled her eyes "we're all adults Tony, we have fun, you should ask pepper, she loves the fun we have after our science lecture"

His fist connected with Heather's face forcing her head to the side and before he could move he was yanked back to the ground by JD standing on his chest with a knife pointing to his neck "give me a reason stark, give me a reason not to slash your throat right now!"

The group backed up shocked and Heather rightened her nose wiping the blood on her white shirt and looking at Tony on the floor "do you feel better now? Look I'm sorry about sleeping with Pepper okay? Just tell her to stop coming into my room at 2am, its difficult to resist a beautiful blonde throwing herself at me" she spat out some blood that landed on him and laughed "now! can everyone lower their testosterone levels and calm the fuck down, me and scarlet or wanda whatever she wants to be called just had a little misunderstanding" she looked at Nat with her arms around Wanda "ugh you two are gross"

"Well if you knew what love was maybe you'd feel different" Wanda grumbled but Heather just rolled her eyes "why do I need love when I can have a few girls in my bed at a time, maybe you and Romanoff want to join me some time" she winked and picked up JD by his neck bringing some of his attention back to her "come on JD let's go" he refused to move though keeping his eyes locked on Tony

"Let me have him..." JD's eyes flashed red as he tried to pull out of Heather's hold but the demon kept a tight hold of him "don't be a dick, let's go" she managed to pull him off of Tony and away from the group making their way outside.

"I should've slashed him, I hate the guys here! They need to be taught a lesson!" Heather watched as JD went through his little tantrum and ducked the garbage cans that headed her way.

Finally he calmed down and fell to the ground looking at the demon who had lit a joint and had smoked half of it in the time JD had his tantrum and was now calm "are you done?"

JD growled at Heather "oohhh big scary doggy is mad at me, do you want to go back to the house?"

JD nodded "you go back, I'm gonna go for a run, maybe kill a rabbit I don't know"

Heather chuckled "a rabbit?"

"I don't judge you for what you eat" he pushed himself off of the floor and pulled the rolled joint from her lips stealing it from her "now, I'll see you back at the house, don't get into anymore fights" he left without another word and Heather morned the loss of her only source of happiness in that moment.

"What's a pretty lady like you doing out here in the cold?" the voice jostled Heather from her quiet time and she whipped her head around to someone she'd never seen before "I don't know who the lady is you're talking about but this demon queen is having a moment to herself" she closed her eyes again and lent her head on the stone wall behind her.

She heard some movement and felt something being pushed into her mouth, she opened her eyes to a joint that the girl had put between her lips and she happily took a drag enjoying the slight fruity taste "well you've certainly got my attention" she pulled the roll from her mouth handing it back to the attractive brunette who accepted it back and spoke again "do you mind sharing your private moment?"

Heather nodded "well now that we've shared weed I think you should tell me your name" Heather pushed herself off the wall taking in the girl before her but before her eyes could travel further a cough brought Heather back up to her eye-line "if you're going to be pervert make it less obvious, I'm Veronica" the brunette gave Heather her hand to shake but Heather instead brought it up to her lips and kissed it "I'm Heather"

Veronica brought her hand back and nodded "trust me I know who you are very well"

Heather furrowed her eyebrows trying to remember if she had slept with her at one point and it must've shown clear on her face because Veronica's mouth turned up into a grin

"No we haven't slept together, I moved in with pepper and she won't shut up about you and your "exceptionally long tongue", Tony isn't impressed by the way"

Heather snorted "Tony has no idea how to please a woman, poor pepper comes to me tense and touchy of course I need to help her, I'm just being a good friend"

"wow, very inspirational miss Chandler-"

The door behind them suddenly burst open and a frantic looking pepper appeared "Heather!" she pulled out a napkin and started wiping at the blonde's bloody nose "pepper it's fine come on" Heather pulled away and held onto Pepper's hands and kissing her cheek trying to calm her down.

"Thank you for caring my love, I promise your boyfriend didn't hurt me" she winked making Pepper giggle "okay...do you need help getting back to your house?"

Heather smiled at Pepper's persistent attitude "I'm okay" she looked at Veronica who was finishing off the joint giving her a half smile "I think Veronica here can get me back safely"

Pepper turned to Veronica and scowled “I knew you wanted her!”

Veronica stepped back but held her ground “Oh stop it pepper, I’m not one to sleep with anyone who’s had more than both football teams”

Heather fake pouted and put her hand to her heart “you wound me Veronica, but fear not, I’ll have you one day”

“When hell freezes over Chan” veronica retorted and Heather just smirked “I can make that happen”

Veronica rolled her eyes not knowing Heather was being serious, she looked back at pepper who was still hanging onto Heather's arm for dear life and Heather herself looked down at the death grip Pepper had on her arm "Pepper my love, I'll see you later when you've sobered up okay?" Pepper gave a small nod "okay... call me later please" Heather smiled sweetly at the girl "of course" giving her a kiss on the head she pulled out of her grasp moving her to the door she came out off pushing her back in side and shutting the door letting out a sigh wiping herself down from the invisible germs

"She's crazy" Veronica started walking through the little alleyway away from the rowdy frat house followed quickly by the demon who had her eyes glued on her body, the way her dark blue dress came just above knees and how it hugged her body nicely "you really can't keep your eyes to yourself can you?" Veronica laughed to herself but Heather carried on looking "well if you won't let me touch I think I'm allowed to look"

Veronica turned her head and winked at the blonde "you may look all you want Heather, you're still not touching" Heather caught up in front of Veronica stopping her in her tracks "are you straight? Not that it matters, 3 of the professors here are "straight" and I still sleep with them"

"I'm not straight" Veronica said and Heather made sure to remember that

"Okay, so you're playing hard to get? It's fine I like the chase" she grinned while Veronica suddenly spun them both around so Heather was pressed against the brick wall and veronica's hands were on either side of her head "you've had women crawl at your feet and line up outside your door waiting to get even a sliver of your attention" she gave a small kiss on Heather's ear making the blonde suck in a small breath "but I'm the one woman you can't seduce and it's driving you crazy" she pulled away with a wide smile and continued walking leaving a confused Heather behind who stumbled to keep up with her

"That wasn't very fair Veronica!" she managed to keep her voice steady and continued "I get it, you're the new kid in college and you wanna be different and edgy, how about this" she wrapped her arm around Veronica's shoulder "we spend some time together, maybe I'll buy takeout and a bottle of wine then we fall into bed and end up in a mess of sweaty bodies and euphoria?"

Veronica put her own arm around Heather's shoulder "you have such a vivid imagination Chandler I almost do want to sleep with you" Heather smirked "I can make it real"

Veronica laughed as they reached Heather's house "I'm afraid you'll have to use your hands tonight or maybe Pepper is still available"

Heather gave a disgusted look "ugh she's so desperate it's almost embarrassing, you know how difficult it is to finish when all you hear in your ear is 'I love you Heather, please don't make me leave, I'll do whatever you want" Heather mocked the way Pepper spoke to her and Veronica burst out laughing “that’s such a good impression, the first night I was here she came back in tears, that's how I found out about you. I’ve seen her cry more in this week than I ever have in my 24 years of life”

“She needs to get a grip, anyone I’m done talking about pepper, would you like to come in?” they had arrived at Heather's house and Veronica let out a sigh crossing her arms “for a drink I promise” Heather opened the front door and offered for Veronica to walk through which she did “one drink of whiskey and a sandwich”

Heather clicked her tongue “hmm best I can do is the whiskey, we don't have much food"

Veronica furrowed her eyebrows in confusion "you don't have any food?"

"Don't feel bad Veronica, we have takeout food, plus I'm normally at someone else's place and they cook for me" she beamed and watched Veronica laugh and roll her eyes "I'm surprised this place is lived in" she walked into the house with Heather following closely behind "JD take your hand out of your pants we have company!" Veronica slapped the blonde's arm and whispered "don't be mean".

"Why are you such an asshole?!" JD came out of one of the rooms in the spacious house and his eyes landed on Veronica making him sigh heavily "really? You have a fight with Tony then bring his girlfriends roommate back? Aren't your body parts raw?"

Heather walked up to JD and slapped him on the back of the head "do you have to be gross?"

"Do you have to keep physically assaulting me?"

Heather laughed "I do if you keep being a dick"

Veronica clicked her fingers bringing their attention back to her "don't worry JD I'm not sleeping with Heather"

Heather pouted "you're still on that? Fine, we'll be best friends to lovers"

Veronica gave her a sarcastic thumbs up and headed for what she hopefully finds is the kitchen, finding the room she heard Heather and JD behind her "so Veronica, what's your major?" JD tried making conversation.

Veronica huffed quickly finding the whiskey and poured 3 glasses handing the other two to the pair and downing her own in one surprising Heather "that was hot"

JD slapped her on the arm "all she did was drink something"

"Yeah and she looked hot doing it" Heather argued and all Veronica did was giggle "for someone who sleeps with everyone you're down bad"

"only for you my sweet one" she winked and Veronica looked back to JD "to answer your question I'm in writing and English stuff like that I guess, it's only been a week I'll probably change it though, what about you?"

JD shook his head "I'm not studying, I just keep Heather out of trouble" Heather faked shock "you mean you didn't pass any exams to get you into a smart college???"

"Fuck off Heather if I wasn’t here they would’ve arrested you already” her finished his drink and gave the glass back to Veronica “sorry about her Veronica, why do you think you’ll change your major?”

Veronica shrugged “I don’t know I really like writing and stuff like that but I’ve thought about photography and art, i like painting when things get difficult and I need a distraction from…everything” she whispered the last word and Heather moved closer rubbing Veronica’s arm changing her demeanour “is this a parent thing? If your parents aren’t proud of you fuck them, they don’t control you okay?”

Veronica nodded and offered Heather a small smile “it’s not meant to be so dramatic but yeah my parents are writers and they want me to be a writer but I’d rather draw the illustrations on the books not write the stories in them you know?”

Heather listened to every word “absolutely, you know my parents were dicks as well” she took a drink of her whisky and heard JD groan “Heather don’t start”

She continued regardless “they didn’t like that I was gay which for the time period sure, I didn’t live up to their standard of being a ‘perfect woman for a man’ and then the sons of bitches thought they could burn me! Like who burns their own daughter? But I clearly lived” she gave a wink to JD who put his head in his hands

Veronica was very confused “they…they burnt you? Heather are you okay? Do we need to call someone?”

JD jumped in quickly “she didn’t mean they actually set her on fire all they did was give her burn marks with cigarettes and lighters, which is obviously bad like very bad but she’s clearly fine right?”

“JD you gotta calm down, just relax I’m messing with Veronica” she looked back at Veronica “but seriously my parents were assholes and now I’m here, but back to you, you do art, do photography, I’ll even be your muse, we can get some really nice boudoir pics” she winked and the mood lightened

“You really can’t be serious for 5 minutes can you?” JD mocked and makes his way back to his room waving Veronica away “nice to meet you Veronica but I’ve got a headache and Heather’s being too much all at once” Veronica said her goodbye to the boy leaving her and Heather alone once again.

“He’s such a drama queen now about that photography-“

“Heather I appreciate the offer but it’s not happening you know that”

Heather held her hands up in defeat “alright I give in, until tomorrow at least" she didn't push but did try one more thing "do you wanna stay here?”

Veronica shook her head “I should get back to pepper, need to get some sleep but I'm sure Pepper will need some consoling”

Heather agreed “she cries so loud, okay one minute” she picked her phone out of her jeans pocket handing it to Veronica “give me your number and text me when you get back to your dorm safe”

Veronica accepted her phone typing in her number “no sexting though”

Heather put on a sad face “awe but I’ve got such a way with words, I can make you so flustered”

“And I can’t? I bet I can make you flustered too” Veronica fired back

Heather was a little taken back and raised her eyebrow “soooo are we happening?”

Veronica lent foreword and gave her a kiss on the cheek “no but it’s fun to tease you”

Heather blushed, something she didn’t know she could do anymore, “are you another version of me?”

Veronica patted her on the cheek and went for the door "see you Heather"

"See you hot stuff" the door shut behind Veronica and Heather let out a breath "damn" she closed her eyes and smiled, 'what a great night, besides the punch from Tony'. She revealed in the few minutes of peace until a voice broke her from her thoughts.

"And shouting at me" Heather cracked a eye open and saw Wanda with her arms folded "Wanda, we talked about you reading my mind" she closed her eyes again and felt a hand grip her shoulder making her open her eyes again to the Russian in need of anger management lessons "Natasha please it's been a strange night, I don't need you to be more of an asshole tonight"

She moved to the front room followed by the pair and collapsed onto the couch "so ladies, you managed to escape your guard dogs? You haven't told them we're all friends and I'm the one supplying you guys with the "special performance enhancers" you need?" Heather had been giving the girls cocaine and other pills for months, no one asked questions and no one needed too, Heather knew they were just using her but she didn't mind, being thousands of years old she needed something to do and helping "superhero" college people gave her some excitement.

Wanda shrugged "clearly JD didn't get the message about us being friends" the red head played with the rings on her fingers with a mad expression on her face.

"come off it Wanda, you don't even like Tony" Heather continued "We were in a frat house Wanda, there's STDs, fluids and who knows what else, like I said glass is the least of anyones worries" she looked at Nat glaring down at her and smirked "maybe your Russian isn't giving you what you need, give me 10 minutes with her Nat and I'll get the knot out of her back"

Nat threw a dagger through Heather's shoulder making the demon smirk "do you feel better? You don't scare me Natalia" Nat groaned and pulled the dagger out of her shoulder and pulled Wanda into her kissing her cheek making the witch smile "so Heather who was the girl?"

Heather chuckled "it's funny how quick you change attitudes Wanda, but sure I'll entertain you, that was Veronica she didn't instantly want to sleep with me and I was intrigued”

Wanda flopped down next to the blonde with Nat close to her side “so you want her?”

Heather nodded “of course I want her she’s hot” Heather shifted so she was lay down on the couch keeping her head on Nat's lap "do you need something?" Nat sighed and Heather shrugged "if you play with my hair and call me a pretty girl I might purr for you" she cheesed at the redhead

Nat did as Heather asked and ran her fingers through Heather's hair pulling out the knots that had gathered "you're a demon with a god complex and who acts like a teenage boy who's just discovered naked women and has a high sex drive" Wanda exclaimed out of the blue making both Heather and Nat speechless

"Wow Wanda, I didn't need a full psychology analysis"

The trio sat in silence for a while until Heather's phone lit up but before she could get it from the side Wanda flew it over to herself taking a look at the screen "Veronica's back at her place, Pepper's still crying-"

Heather scoffed "of course she is, such a crybaby"

"and she's being yelled at because she thinks Veronica wants you" Wanda finished and Heather jumped up from Nat's lap nearly knocking her from the couch "she's yelling at her??" her eyes darkened and Wanda stepped back "Heather...you don't know it's angry yelling, maybe it's just a heated discussion about you"

"No fuck this I'm going to get Veronica" she quickly stormed through the room and tried opening the door before Wanda kept it shut with her powers "witchy I swear if you don't open this door I'll take you hell and force you to listen to a replay of Tony's monologues for all eternity"

"Heather just calm down, we'll go with you to see Veronica but you need to relax, does Veronica even know you're a demon?" Wanda was right, Veronica didn't know what Heather was and she was pretty are that'd scare anyone off before a first date.

"Fine" Heather loosened her grip on the door handle and took a deep breath releasing a sigh and turning around "lets go then" she growled and the girls quickly followed the angry demon.

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