#diagnose tone

[swinging-stars-from-satellites]

will you shut the fuck up? what if the shit doesn't hit the fan? what if we do make it? what if you don't die? can you have a little hope? just have a little hope

#stop dooming your own narrative and living under that shadow. ffs #this isn't actually vagueing at anyone here this is vagueing at my grandpa bc I've been mildly annoyed all week #that he's SO fatalistic about EVERYTHING. like yeah the world sucks. so what? stop being cynical about it #which is hilarious bc he's the SOFTEST guy ever. he just occasionally goes off on these deeply cynical rambles #in the softest friendliest tone of voice and I'm like. wow. can you maybe have a little hope please??? #anyway I'm gonna say this in the tags here bc I have a weird mental block about making a Real Post: #please pray for my grandpa bc his heart surgery went great but he's been diagnosed with a pretty bad form of cancer #so... yeah #prayers for him and our whole family and all of their relationships with God to grow instead of getting worse and etc etc etc #I'm at the OTHER grandparents' house rn and need prayer for OTHER things here but. yeh #Lu rambles #soz for the language I just needed to say this

[thebluestbluewords]

cinderellaverse?? In my 2024??

it’s more likely than you think!

(for context: the rotten ot4 are wildly codependent, Ben is possibly seducing them all via unreciprocated acts of kindness, and this takes place directly after the iconic Good Boy scene, only with some AU changes that aren’t ready to post yet).

(why am i posting this if no other context is finished yet??? Because I’m needy and crave validation. Next question, please).

+

“Ugh,” Mal agrees. She looks mostly asleep still, which is understandable. “Weird. Did you eat yet?” 

Carlos lifts the napkin-wrapped bundle in his hands. “I brought food. To share. If you want.” 

This, predictably, gets Mal up. They’re far enough away from the isle that Carlos can almost believe that their parents aren’t lurking behind every dark corner of the castle, but not so far that they’ll turn down fresh food, even at stupid early hours.

“Berries?” 

“Yeah. Brought berries for you. And muffins.” 

“Evie wants chocolate,” Mal says immediately, stretching out both hands for the napkin-wrapped bundle. “And weird that Ben made you meet someone new. I thought we’d already been subjected to every princess-type in the school by now.” 

“Not a person. He made me meet a— a dog.” 

Mal stops with the muffins in her hands still outstretched. “Oh,” she says carefully, which is nice of her. Their Auradon education must be kicking in, or some shit. “And you’re not halfway home?” 

“I was. But Ben sort of—put the dog away and tracked me down? He was cool about it. We went over afterwards to check out the stables, cause he thought maybe it was like, just animals I don’t like, and they’ve got cats and stuff there. And the dog was on a leash, and he’s actually super tiny and not murderous.” Carlos shrugs, telegraphing the motion as much as he can. Which isn’t much. He’s supposed to be working on the whole expressing emotions thing. Even though it’s so much easier to shut down entirely whenever he feels an emotion. “So yeah. Still alive, still here! And Ben’s being weird.” 

“Weird how?” 

“Just weird. He was being all nice and stuff. D’you think he’s been bribed by Fairy Godmother to get info on us?” 

“Might be,” Mal agrees, tearing into her muffin. She’s unwrapped the whole bundle, and laid them out in an order that’s got to make sense in her head. (it shouldn’t make sense. They can’t afford to be predictable. Predictable is how you get your lunch stolen, or poisoned, or eaten by pirates who think it’s funny to take a perfectly rotten sandwich and swap it out for seaweed slime). “You should eat though. You didn’t tell him anything, right?” 

Carlos pulls a scrap off the cinnamon sugar muffin. It’s the one Mal’s put in his assigned spot, which is directly across from her own, with Evie’s double chocolate on the left and Jay’s lemon poppyseed on the right. He’s not really hungry, but it’s still too much to turn down food, so he rolls it between his fingers until half of the sugar falls off into the napkin, and the rest of it is compressed into the smallest possible ball of muffin flesh. He can eat a little piece of it, and then Mal will stop asking, and he can eat for real later. Once he’s alone. 

He pops the ball of muffin into his mouth. “No. Not really.” 

Mal shoves another mouthful of muffin into her mouth. She picked the blueberry one, and it turns the whole mess of it vividly purple as she chews. “Cool. He’s probably just being a royal brat then, trying to get some new intel for the gossip mill. But hey, it’s cool that he showed you the stables. Maybe next time we need to get to town you can steal us a horse, yeah?” 

Carlos snorts. He’s seen a horse now, and there’s no way they can get away with stealing something that big and ornery. Cars might be bigger, but they don’t bite and they don’t poop and they don’t have teeth the size of his fingers and a desire to bite through anything that looks even remotely like a carrot. “Yeah, no. Horses are fucking giant.” 

“I wouldn’t know,” Mal says casually. She throws one of her loose berries up so she can catch it in her teeth. Sometimes, when it’s just the four of them, Mal forgets to act human and does things like this. Things where she snatches treats out of the air with her teeth, when her neck bends in ways that a human’s shouldn’t, like she’s forgotten that she only has seven bones in her neck and not seventeen like a standard dragon. “Nobody ever wakes me up at the crack of dawn to show me cool shit.” 

Carlos wants to laugh and make this whole thing normal, but he’s fucking exhausted and the cinnamon sugar from the muffin is sticky on his fingers. He’s been trying to pull it apart carefully so that his whole hands don’t get covered in the crumbly topping, but that’s been working about as well as their escape plan so far, which is to say not at fucking all. “Yeah, yeah. He also made us run laps first, don’t be jealous.” 

Mal snaps her teeth. “I’ll be whatever I want. He didn’t do anything else?“ 

“Nope.” 

“You sure?” 

“Yes, mom. He just wanted to talk a bunch about how we’re settling in. And how we’re doing emotionally.” 

#emotions are really hard when you’re…. from the isle #(I haven’t worked on this section of this fic in genuinely ages and I’m HAVING THOTS AGAIN) #mostly about how these two are soooo bad at communicating #anyway on a totally unrelated note!!! #(I say. Lying.) #I’m trying to come to terms with the fact that I am possibly. less than stellar at processing emotions. because of the way my brain is wire #which is to say #my husband (diagnosed autistic) #thinks I may also be on the spectrum #and i am choosing to make that a fictional character problem #so anyway specifically these two will be having an AWFUL time before I do some. toning down in the editing process. #this doesn’t get a real fic tag don’t look at me

[musicals-and-mushrooms]

guys how do you deal with the 'popular kids'? Like seriously even if they arent targeting me specifically everything they say feels like theyre making fun of me and theyre dragging me down and they shouldnt be able to do that if im being honest like i know my worth im a debate team captain with 3 medals of excellence(75% A grades across all subjects) college colours, have a lead role in a musical and lots of friends like i believe im a good person and i know im a person that can win in arguments im a really good actor but for some reason theyre able to turn me into a literal pushover (i got pushed over in sport yesterday on accident) and ill just be like yeah im fine im sorry because everything feels threatening like they could be just talking with me and i feel like theyre making fun of me i cannot read social situations to save my life WAIT THATS THE PROBLEM I KNOW MY FRIENDS SO I UNDERSTAND WHAT THEY ARE SAYING BUT I DONT REALLY KNOW THESE GUYS SO I ASSUME EVERYTHING IS A THREAT AND TBH IT MIGHT BE BUT OH THATS IT but yeah if someone has any advice please help because this isnt like the musicals?? Probably closest to bmc im in my jeremy era but also BACK TO PLAY REHEARSAL MY BRAIN IS LIKE BZZ MY HEART IS LIKE WOW BECAUSE IM ALMOST AT PLAY REHEARSAL AND ITS STARTING ITS STARTING ITS STARTING SOON!! TOMORROW AFTERNOON!!! so hopefully ill be able to be more christine and yeah thats my life advice would be appreciated👍

#my thoughts #adhd problems #actually autistic #i havent been properly diagnosed but i know that struggling with tone is a big thing and i need help so people who know ? #Know what i mean thats what i mean #Ive been coping by sending all my friends a message saying i found a really saucy photo of david tennant #Then sending them the photo of him in the tomato sauce costume #Life stuff #school life #high school #achool problems #be more chill #bmc #bmc fanart #christine canigula #robyn rambles

[fluffypotatey]

discovered yesterday that the reason my mom disliked my kindergarten teacher wasn’t because she was rude to me, but because the teacher told her that i may be autistic

sooooooooooooooo

the clues were there all along

#like the teacher didn’t SAY autistic #but she did say ‘slow’ which is the euphemism for autistic (and my mom implied when telling my sister that it was with a tone™️) #anyway #ya learn something new! #this actually explains so much #also fuck you for making that be the reason i wasn’t allowed in the gifted kids program #would that have fucked up my already fucked up mental state when it comes to academics like it did my siblngs? yes but that’s unimportant #I HAVE MY PRIDE DAMMIT #also my sister and i are fairly confident that our whole family mayhaps be on the spectrum #(definitely my mom) #(i am still 95% sure the adhd symptoms are from my dad but again i am diagnosed for neither) #(the only real self-diagnosis i can confidently account for is my depression!) #*coughs* anyway

[darcyolsson]

percy jackson is perfect rep because neurodivergent kids truly will find out they literally speak zebra and their only thought will be "look at me. i can't even speak lion. probably means theres something wrong with me again :("

#im doing a reread! the plan is to read both pjo and hoo but well see how far i get #ive been wanting to finish hoo for like. ten years but i never did bc i wanted to reread pjo first #twas the right call i dont remember ANYTHING from these books lol #really interesting to read this as a 21 year old instead of an 11 year old bc percys 12 year oldness is palapable in a way it wasnt before #not in a bad way but more that i realise now how well rr got into the brain of a 12 year old kid w adhd #because the tone is so different from books im used to reading these days #also ive been diagnosed with both dyslexia and adhd since first reading these lmfaooo so thats fun too #personal #pjo #chb

[spidermanifested]

youtube comments sections always have brand new types of ableist in them. like completely novel takes on the material. what is this

#ableism / #youve heard of getting really mad at people for their tone. now get ready for. diagnosing them with a personality disorder over it

[szappan]

i have the temperament of a very nervous and aged little dog. generally cheery and glad to go on walks and to see people but will soon perish from the sheer stress of alla that

#i took part in this summer course in finland right? i havent talked about it much but it also feels like i cant shut up about it #anyway so it was 3 weeks long i had 3 teachers and was evaluated on 3 criteria #being writing speaking and class participation #and by the last week ive had so much of constant interaction and stuff that i couldnt really even speak on monday #and tuesday was the last day when i was evaluated #and i was just generally away with the fairies by the end of the second week #and i got a 5 for both speaking and writing and only a 4 for socialising and my main teacher told me that it just seemed like i was living #in my own little world. AND HERES THE CATCH. she said. living in my own world THE WHOLE TIME #come on i was trying so hard. for like a week and a half. but i was!!! and i was going strong until those last two days #anyway diagnosed with weirdgirl syndrome at first glance. (in finland!) #ok so what was my point. oh yeah im so nervous but so so hopeful also #my post #(she told me that in finnish btw and i understood it which is soso cool i think) #(something else thats cool is how finnish people say kiitos. they kind of say kiiidoOOS raising their tone and all and with a d i like it)

[trauma-trove]

[Id: screencap from the Barbie movie where Barbie is dancing at a party and asks if anyone ever thinks about dying. The subtitle is edited to read, "Do you guys ever think you might be a system?" End id.]

I'm delusional again. Fucking sake.

#barbie death meme #'im delusional again' is even a bad way of putting it. I've been having these symptoms nonstop for 2 years. #its time to fucking address this. #your inner monologue comes in several VARYING opinions--each with unique tones of voice and attitude. #you have wildly different feelings and opinions on the same things throughout the day or day to day. #your brother is only ONE YEAR older than you and you grew up in the same household and he is a system. #im a diagnosed psychotic patient with insight and mindfulness. its not unreasonable that you grew up masking better than him out of #adaptive instinct. #you never had a concrete sense of identity. you were nothing but calculating in all areas as a teen. #you're not NORMAL. you're psychotic or autistic or plural or SOMETHING. and no one will ever figure that out if you dont tell someone #vent #self dx

[harleythealter]

Something I’ve noticed, is people connect autism to a stereotype that autistic people struggle with feelings.

It seems to be true for many autistic people, I wonder occasionally if I struggle less because of the way the trauma panned out in my life.

But what I realized I struggle with, is not people misunderstanding my feelings. Or my facial expressions. It’s people listening to mh tone of voice and not my words. And my tone is what I fuck up all the time-fuck up in comparison to the standard set by people who don’t even know what they want because you can never get it right with them.

For example. I say “wow that sucks” with an incredible amount of empath/sympathy(I forgot which one it was). But apparently my tone was off, so no matter how I felt on the inside, I was insulting this person I was being incredibly attentive to.

They listen to my tone and not my words.

There’s more evidence but I don’t want this to be some big vent. It’s just an observation. But an incredibly important one.

#harleythealter #autism struggles #self diagnosed autism #autism #they listen to my tone and not my words

[willows-woes]

mhm

#tone: ironic #tags for reach #mentally fucked #mentally ill #mental illness #dissociation #depersonalisation #derealisation #i feel so empty #by the way i'm not diagnosed with any dissociative disorders but admittedly i'm suspicious based off my symptoms #like i have no idea who i am ever and nothing feels real. every day is a repeat. #i do not exist. i am dead and disconnected. i am rot

[bella-but-not-hadid444]

idk wether this is an autism thing, or maybe its just me

but whenever i talk for extended periods of time, or im hyperverbal on a certain day, i feel quite guilty about talking, the guilt makes me want to never talk again, idek whyy i feel guilt after talking lots, i just do. 

but every time, wwithout fail, it makes me want to never talk again, the compel of being silent for the rest of my life is so strong.

like im supposed to be the quiet, reserved, socially awkward one, so when i chatter and talk with different people i feel bad about not fitting those adjectives all of the time :(

#btw i am fully verbal #but sometimes i dislike talking #and i wanted to share this weird feeling/experience that happens to me #i tried to word this is a way that did not undermine the struggles of non-speaking/semi-verbal (etc) people #pls tell me if ive written anything tone deaf/rude/incorrect as i am still fairly new to all the terminology and stuff #(i was diagnosed about 2 and 1/2 months ago i think!!) #thank you #:) #neurodivergent #autistic

[trlvsn]

ok im kinda butting in without even reading what you guys were talking about sjfntk sorry but you mentioned something about not understanding tone and tone is hard so I wanted to talk a bit ! I try to use indicators (like elaborating my intentions in brackets) so it's easier to people to clearly understand me :) but I also don't have words for some tones becausee idk maybe my vocabulary isn't good enough, currently I'm trying to think of an alternative to how I used to use /lh (aka. light hearted), it's kinda like when you're not completely serious but you're saying true things and also in a bit of a joking manner? Hard concept for me to explain lol

i feel like the word "friendly" would partially describe that tone. if not, "light-hearted" is still a good tone indicator for the message. i don't think tone needs to be described perfectly, as the indicators are often partially used as reassurance rather than a full description. sometimes i put /lh just for the person to know i'm not being agressive or attacking them: it's not me exactly conveying my tone, but eliminating some unpleasant possibilities.

anyways, on the topic of tone indicators: i do appreciate people using them for me. it's not exactly required, but ... yeah, if you want to avoid a misunderstanding and the possibility of me embarrassing myself, then put one of them bad boys at the end of an ask

#sigh. tone #the day i get diagnosed is the day it gets sm easier #raysidk

[carpathxanridge]

man doing all this research for my presentation about the history of misogyny in the field of psychology and like… it just hit me how completely institutionalized i would be if i were born not even a century ago. like conceivably even 75 years ago.

#i would be diagnosed with hysteria so fucking quick #i’d be so lobotomized #i say in a funny tone to deflect from the horror of that realization

[if-loki-was-a-fox]

Hhhhhh why does it always have to take me six hours to transition into doing anything it's so frustrating I just wanna write that fanfic NOW or take the shower NOW or get out of bed NOW I don't want to spend half the day hyping myself up for it >:|

#vent #<- but not a truama dumping vent or anything #just frustrated with... executive dysfunction? I think that's what this is #idk im not diagnosed I haven't talked to any professionals or ND folks all I know comes from the internet #(namely youtube and instagram shorts/reels) #just me rambling #like legitimately the not being able to shower unless I hype myself up for three and a half days thing is so frustrating #esp when combined with the brain fart of “welp! did my shower don't have to worry about that anymore:)” #*continues not to worry about it for half a week and suddenly needs a shower again* #only exaggerating a little. I do struggle to get even weekly showers done sometimes #like I manage to scrape by but it's not easy for me #fully hate being undiagnosed thank you very much #and since the tone of this is probably kinda heavy/angry: don't worry about me or anything I'm currently happy and doing alright in my life #just wanted to vent a bit bc this is one thing that does bother me still #and it does kinda lead into other issues when life gets busier #like nlt being able to keep up with homework #but I'm good for now! I'm doing well :) #anyways. yes. sorry 'bout the ranting and rambling #gonna go do something fun now bye!

[arsonistblue]

dont ever think u need to conceal your autism to make yourself loved or wanted etc. ive got a girl buddy who is straight autism and its an absolute blast

thank you, i hope you and your autistic girl buddy are having a great day!!

#tbh a lot of my masking is unintentional #it’s just kinda ingrained if that makes sense?? #it’s a lot of fake eye contact and practiced facial expressions and voice tones #bc i didn’t get diagnosed until i was 16 so i had just been masking constantly #i’m working on masking less/controlling when i mask though

[actually-factually-autistic]

so there are the more common sensory yucks neurospicy ppl have, like sock seams and wet food, but like

Does anyone else’s teeth itch when they touch dry paper towels?

Like my skin feels like it’s trying to crawl away and the feeling crawls up to my elbow until I touch a good sensory thing for long enough. 💀🤢😵‍💫

I’d love to hear about others’ sensory palettes or weird(affectionate) stims from anyone willing to share.

I’m here for all the sensory niches and weird stims

#actually autistic #sensory processing disorder #sensory processing issues #sensory processing sensitivity #autistic feels #late diagnosed autistic #late diagnosed adhd #i am an actual (professional) disaster #screaming into the void #looked into the abyss and blinked #blinky friends #stimming #pissing crying shitting /j /hyp #I don’t actually know how tags work #I like emojis because they’re like neurotypical tone indicators