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#didn't feel like marvel but i think that was a good thing
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Some off-the-cuff thoughts on overspiritualizing patterns in science
I remember watching a talk in middle school youth group about laminin, the "molecule that holds your whole body together" which was supposedly shaped like a cross. The suggestion, basically, was that the cross's image was integral to our molecular makeup and that this was part of God's design in a very Significant way. I was a burgeoning STEM girl, so I taped a diagram of a laminin up next to my bed for a while.
(As I would later find out, the whole laminin thing had/has some reach among Christians. There are T-shirts and everything)
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Fast forever to spring of my freshman year as a microbiology student. I take my first course in cell bio, and I learn that laminins are actually one of many families of ECM glycoproteins. They aren't really any more significant in "holding the body together" than collagens, elastins, or fibronectins. They're very important, yes, but ultimately just one type of adhesive protein among many. And! They also do a bunch of other stuff that's way cooler than just. Adhesive.
While some laminins do bear resemblance to a cross when diagramed, it's really only because they have three subchains. Some are t-shaped, but others are y-shaped, and those don't look anything like a cross. Also, when they're in situ rather than in a nice, neat diagram, they tend to be all floppy and then they look even less cross-like.
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And when I learned about this I was oddly relieved. It felt like I was right about something that I couldn't even put into words, and that somehow the field of what I could call glorious had grown wider.
Christians are called to see and marvel at the presence of God in creation. I love doing that! I see God left and right through my scientific studies. Yet I also know that the human brain is pattern-seeking and that we are prone to pareidolia. I honestly don't know that there's a substantive difference between seeing the cross in some laminins and seeing Jesus on a piece of toast. It's all just seeing patterns that arise from something else (in the case of laminins, being able to bind three different molecules at once) and attributing spiritual significance. God is sovereign and maybe in the grand scope of his vision for creation it means something, but in terms of seeing God's hand in science I just find it so... small?
You could spin so many four-chain or four-domain proteins or goodness knows how many other molecules into images of the cross if you pick the right diagram. You could take every pattern of three in nature (and there are many!) as an image of the Trinity. If you really, really wanted to, you could take every six in organic chemistry as a sign of the beast, which would be hilarious in its misguidedness. It just becomes so literalistic and dull so very fast.
Look! Wouldn't you rather talk about the fact that laminins begin to appear along the edge of a developing lung at just ten weeks of human embryonic development, suggesting that they play a role in alveolar morphogenesis? That they're present in the neural stem-cell niche, which makes them an attractive candidate for helping to treat degenerative neurological conditions? I want to go back to whoever gave that talk that I watched in youth group and shake him and say, "God did that, and you're still hung up on the fact that laminins have three subchains?"
#God is so so big and as a result the horizons of science are ENORMOUS#very often when Christians talk about science it's with a tone of '#see! look we found it! the God molecule! incontrovertible proof of the divine!'#and like. my brothers and sisters in Christ. God didn't create the world for us to prove our way to him#he created a world that shouts and cries his name but we have to know HIM first! not the other way around#you're not gonna find God in Laminins if you're fixated on it being this big significant Thing that Proves that GOD SIGNS HIS HANDIWORK!#you can absolutely meet him there if you take the time to marvel at the glory of a molecule this versatile#about which we can ask questions! and draw closer to our creator by understanding his creation better!#just. i feel such a grave responsibility and a glorious joy towards promoting scientific literacy among Christians#it's hard to describe but in a lot of ways it's the thing i want most to do with my life#also to be clear: not trying to vague-post about anyone#Kaylie's post about quarks did inspire this but only insomuch as it skirted right up against this subject#about which i clearly have a lot to say#the original post was gleeful and charming and I'm so glad that you're enjoying your physics book!#just. i think it's important not to fixate on the symbols at the expense of the actual wonders of creation#wow I am such a woman in stem#good grief#pontifications and creations#all truth is god's truth#endless forms most beautiful
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brielarsonist · 1 year
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I did some editing to one of my fics last night for the first time in a long time, and it felt so good to work on it again! I’ve been feeling so off and not like myself for so long, but hopefully I can keep taking little steps to get to where I want to be
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queers-gambit · 8 months
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Curiosity Killed The Cat
prompt: after rescuing you from kidnappers, you overhear your boyfriend-turned-savior complain about how clingy you've become.
pairing: Mafia!Bucky Barnes x female!reader
fandom masterlist: Marvel
word count: 5.1k+
note: author wants things out of her drafts! also don't take this fic too seriously, it's not much at all - just me writing for the fuck of it until i'm ready to focus on my bigger projects.
warnings: modern AU, Mafia AU, obvious cursing, small hurt and comfort, brief depiction of physical violence and self-destruction in the form of: loss of appetite, lack of sleep, other symptoms of depression. NOT edited! author is ashamed because she knows she can give you something better but oh well.
browse the Clingy Baby collection masterlist here
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Your feet planted, jarring you to a halt the moment you heard your name in a conversation you were not apart of.
You heard the hammering of your heart, echoing beats of your blood pumping with harrowing desperation. Hands turned cold and clammy, sweat breaking out on your brow and then freezing, feeling as if your throat had swollen to a new restriction and you were anchored in you in place.
Rooted.
But for now, all you could identify was the paralyzing anxiety that anchored you to your spot and made your heartbeat thunder in your ears. You stood outside the lounge, unable to comprehend relevant thought; still listening to low, docile tones continue their conversation, but you couldn't hear real words.
You were stunned. Panicked, confused, hurt - so very hurt. That seemed to register, too; you were really, really hurt.
This was perhaps why curiosity killed the cat.
You reprimanded yourself for listening in - transporting back to childhood during all the times your parents would scold you for eavesdropping. You knew it was wrong, you knew this was a private conversation meant to be shared between trusting confidants, but you couldn't help it - you heard your name and stopped. It was natural, right? To feel curious regarding a conversation seemingly about you that you, yourself, was not apart of?
Curiosity, indeed.
Blinking rapidly, you remembered the only other time you felt such mounting, pressurized fear, and while it might be dramatic, the only other time you could remember this level of anxiety was from about two months ago...
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"Yes, baby, I got the bacon."
"And the jalapeños?"
"Uh-huh, the biggest they had."
"Cream cheese?"
"Do you know who you're talking to?" You laughed into the phone. "I'm a professional housewife by now, you can relax. I got all you needed for your fancy little dinner experiment."
Bucky laughed down the phone, "Oh, please, like I didn't see you salivating when we watched the segment on Top Chef."
"Hush," you laughed, too. "I'm leaving the store now," you told him, pushing out of the heavy glass doors, "and should be home in, like, 10 minutes?"
"Lemme pick you up."
"I have legs to walk with, so, no thank you."
He sighed, "Well, I'll open the wine to let it breathe. Red's still good?"
"Let's do a white tonight, please."
"Good deal," he mused softly. "Hey, I was thinking earlier - "
"Hang on," you pleaded.
"What's wrong?"
"No, nothing. There's just a van slowing down, I don't want to get hit," you chuckled some, looking up and down the street before crossing. "Sorry, so, what were you thinking?"
"We haven't been to Paris in months."
You smirked, "I'm sure our plants in the apartment are dead by now."
Bucky laughed, "Oh, I am, too. But, look, how 'bout it, Peach? You, me, all the croissants we can consume this weekend. I'll take Monday and Tuesday off, we can leave tomorrow night."
"Oh, that sounds nice," you moaned. "Paris in the spring? Baby, that's so dreamy!"
"So, is that a yes?"
"It's a hell yes," you grinned. "Do you know the weather?"
"Supposed to be nice and sunny, not too warm or cold. Figured this would be ideal," he chuckled. "But does the weather matter if we're in bed the whole time?"
"No, we're not wasting our time!" You laughed. "We're gonna go do shit, okay? Stereotypical tourist-couple shit."
"I'll bring the camera."
"And I was hoping we could have dinner at that little place we love?"
"I wouldn't take you anywhere else," he mused.
"I think it's - FUCK!" Bucky froze when he heard the screeching of tires; a van coming up to a skidding halt, flurry of voices all yelling but he heard yours clearly. "No, no, no, hey, hey, what the hell's happening? Hey! What's this - hey, hey! Don't touch me! Ow, shit! No! Hey! Fuck's sake - oh, my God! Ow! Hey!"
"Baby!? Peach! Hey! The fuck's going on!?"
There was a thudding over the phone, and Bucky listened to more struggling - more fidgeting and fighting - and then the slamming of a car door. Still calling your name, Bucky heard a scrape over the line before a different voice answered your phone, "James Barnes. On behalf of HYDRA, you're overdue on your payment and we warned you there would be consequences. Deliver the full amount of 17 million - "
"It's 15," he growled.
"Two million more for the inconvenience of stalking your woman."
"If you even so much as touch her, I swear to God - "
"17 million at midnight, at the pier, or every minute you're late, she'll receive the brunt end of our frustration."
"Don't hurt her - "
"Midnight, Mr. Barnes, at the pier - you know where. Don't be late, she looks like she won't last long."
The line went dead after he heard your screech of pain, confusion, and fear. The moment the line cut, he dropped his phone and slowly lowered himself to sit on the kitchen floor, shock coloring his system. It wasn't that he didn't have the money, quite the opposite - but he and his men had a plan in motion to take out HYDRA, their org's competition, and this was totally against all they anticipated. After a minute to sit in his own worry, Bucky jumped to his feet, grabbed his phone, keys, wallet, and two handguns; holstering them both before shrugging his suit jacket on.
He made every phone call he could, gathering the men he trusted most to (one of) his warehouse(s).
For hours, you were strung up by your wrists in a joint-pulling position while the Brooklyn Mafia formulated a plan of attack. It was the most pain you've ever known, but then the abuse started and you were blinded by this new pain. You had bruises most places, cuts that wept blood; scars that would never heal, wounds that wouldn't ever close. You were delirious, miserable, confused, just dazed and confused; praying to a God who didn't listen.
"Oh, look at that," your captor mocked, holding a thick-bladed hunting knife in hand, "it's one minute til midnight, and I don't see your loverboy anywhere."
You sniffled, unable to respond.
He stared out the lone window, tisking and narrating, "Nope, I see not a soul - and with how protective he is over you, you'd think he'd want to ensure your safety. Not leave it to chance, huh?"
You whimpered as the clock struck midnight, your heart hammering in heavy-hung worry. You had tears in your eyes, heart nearly beating out of your chest, feeling incredibly nauseous. The desire to scream never lessened, just fearing what was to come; the men in the room making you fear for the state of your life, their knuckles cracking. You only begged, "Please. Don't."
The main captor laughed, "You can do better than that! C'mon, give me the satisfaction of tellin' ol' James you begged for mercy - but it wasn't enough to sway me. I'll lie, for sure, and say it happened but it will be so much sweeter if you actually do it."
"Please," you shook your head, avoiding eye contact. "Just don't do this, please."
"Oh, honey," he mocked, "it's not our fault he's late. Lads! Have at her, but leave her face for now - she's still real pretty."
You listened as he gave commands in Russian, understanding after the years at Bucky's side; whimpering when the first blow landed to your gut and knocked the wind out of you. The minutes drug by and you felt your resolve crumbling, heart still hammering to a never-before-felt speed that made it feel as if it were jumping out of your very body at every single pulse point. You struggled in your restraints, but it was futile by how tight you were bound; unable to protect yourself.
At 12:03 am, the doors blew open in a resounding blast; concrete crumbling and sprinkling the floor. You cried out as the smoke choked you, coughing through the haze; only barely able to make out certain figures to know Bucky had brought his best men. However, despite the sting to your eyes from the swirling dust and smoke, you saw a lone man stalk through the blasted wall, through the fray, and straight up to you.
"Bu-Bucky!" You choked in relief as he reached to untie your feet first. You dangled for only a moment as his metal prosthetic ripped off whatever held your wrists to the torture contraption. "Oh, my God. Oh, my God, Bucky, holy shit, baby, please, please, please," you rambled as he freed you and instantly caught you on his broad shoulders.
"I got you, Peach, I'm here, I've got you," he promised in your ear, hoisting your legs around his waist so they latched and then wrapping his arms around you securely. "Don't let go and don't look up, okay? Hear me, Peach?"
You nodded into his neck, only able to cry.
Bucky jolted and jerked slightly as he moved through the fight again, but not a minute later, you were stepping outside into the sobering, brisk spring air. This was the moment you understood how dangerous and fleeting life with Bucky could be, making a promise to yourself that if he says take the car, you'll take the fucking car.
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And now, here you were, outside the high-rise apartment's lounge (which was just a converted bedroom), listening to your boyfriend complain about you some 2 months after the whole fiasco. HYDRA had been all but wiped out, and in the weeks since, Bucky's men had gone on smaller missions to eradicate the HYDRA members they heard rumor of being local. Yet you didn't feel safe, yet.
You didn't feel safe if you weren't around Bucky.
Everything made you jump: the beep of the done-dryer, that spritz of the automatic fragrance mister in the bathroom, the "duh-dunnn" of a loaded-up Netflix. Keys jingling, car horns, the barking of the dog in the apartment a floor below you... Everything.
Being around Bucky was just like holding a safety blanket. He would always protect you, and for about a week after your rescue, he laid in bed and around the home with you; being lazy; time off work to simply hold you and assure you were safe. Safe in his arms. Safe in his embrace, his presence.
So now... To hear this... You were devastated.
You didn't mean to eavesdrop, it just sort of happened. It was still earlier in the morning, but Bucky hadn't been in bed beside you and based on the feel of the sheets, his body hadn't been there in a while. So, you made some coffee and then ventured around the home in search of your lover; coming upon the lounge and hearing voices from within.
You knew it was common for Steve Rogers and / or Sam Wilson to stay late or visit early, so, you weren't shocked by that, but did falter in announcing yourself when you heard Sam ask how you were doing since the kidnapping. He used your name specifically, making Bucky sigh, and for your curiosity to peak.
"She's different, man."
"How so?" Sam wondered.
"She doesn't like being without me now," he chuckled without humor. "I'm serious, she won't go to the gym until I do, waits to have meals together, won't leave the house if I'm out, and," he scoffed to himself, "you can forget going to the grocery store or anything - she's even stopped going to work - "
"You told her to stop working, like, two years ago when y'all first moved-in together," Sam deadpanned.
"I know," Bucky shrugged, "but it feels tenfold now that she's so reclusive."
"It's normal," Steve sighed gently.
"Yeah? Is it normal that I can't even go take a shit without promising her I'll be right back?" Bucky snapped in exasperation. "It's that bad, she's that fucking clingy, man. I go in the kitchen to make dinner, she's in there 30 seconds later to 'help' me. I take a shower, she finds a reason to linger in the bedroom, but that was better than before, when she wouldn't even shower by herself. It's just a lot, she's everywhere I look. I'm starting to find new reasons not to come home, man, she's always fucking here - and when I walk in the door, she's on me. I need to fucking breathe, but I can't tell her to stop, she'll get her feelings hurt and then I'm the bad guy."
"Man," Steve laughed, "you can't be the bad guy if you go to her in a calm and collected manner, but it's only been two months. She's still recovering."
"Exactly why if I say anything, no matter how calm and collected, I'm the bad guy. I get she's hurting and tryna recover, but Goddamn, does she have to be in every room I'm in? Do everything with me? How do I tell my traumatized girlfriend to back off? Let me breathe?"
Sam laughed, "You don't! You just said it - she's traumatized! Cut the girl some slack, she's got a lot to fuckin' deal with!"
"I'm not negating from that fact," Bucky argued, "I'm just trying to say, the way she's clinging onto me like she can't function without me is just grating at my nerves. I just need to breathe and recharge, but I can't tell her that - fuck's sake."
"Buck," Steve smirked, "you're worried Peach isn't gonna listen, but that's her literal superpower. Just communicate, she can't read your mind, but you need to remember how traumatic all of that was for her to experience - she's scarred from that kidnapping, man. So, sure, you need to recharge, but she needs the support."
"Is it wrong to ask for a day here and there to do that? To recharge?" Bucky asked quietly.
"If you communicate, it's perfectly reasonable to ask for," Sam assured softly. "And whatever you do, don't tell her you think she's clingy. Chicks hate that, that word is, just, like, taboo or something. Real heavy, negative connotations."
"But she is," Bucky growled quietly, "'s like she's afraid to let go 'cause I'll disappear or something."
"Oh, noooo," Sam mocked, "I'm Bucky and my girlfriend loves me too much and trusts me too much and actually feels safe and dependent on me too much - ohhh noooo!"
There was a thump, Sam's cried, "Ow!", and Bucky telling him to shut up. You slowly backed away from the door, trying to settle your breathing as you made your escape down the hall. When back in the kitchen, you whimpered and let the first tears fall... The first of many you shed in the hour it took you to prepare breakfast for everyone; doing your best to eat as you cooked so you didn't have to linger around the men. You took Bucky's words to heart, and maybe you were too sensitive, maybe you should venture outside again.
So, when the lads came out, you set the table without making eye contact with any of them. "Here," you directed, setting the pancakes down, "I made breakfast, come eat, it's still hot."
"Wow," Sam smiled brightly, "thanks, Peach!"
You hummed, still avoiding their eyes as you just set the abundance of food to the table. "You... Cooked without me?" Bucky asked you with skepticism.
"Mhm," you hummed, setting the coffee pot down to a hot pad, "and I'm going out shopping with Nat, so, eat up, lads, I'll do the dishes when I get home. Love you, boys, bye," you waved them off, snatching your keys and then moving to the door to stuff your feet into your sneakers.
"Woah, woah, woah," Bucky left the table, approaching you urgently, "hey, what do you mean? You're goin' out?"
"Yep, figured I've stayed in too long, might as well get out and remember life doesn't stop just 'cause I'm sad."
"Peach - "
"I'll see you when I get home, Buck, okay?" You mumbled, slinging your purse on your shoulder.
"Well, here, here, hey, wait, hang on," he pulled his wallet out, handing you over a wad of big bills. "Spend it all, okay? Have fun, call or text if you need me, yeah?"
"Sure."
Bucky leaned in to kiss you but you just opened the door, ready to leave. He frowned, watching you, barely managing to call a quick, "Love you!"
You didn't return the sentiment, feeling hallow and all too silly to return the affection. In your purse was your laptop, headphones, chargers, and whatever else, so, instead of meeting your friend, Natasha - being just a ruse to avoid Bucky - you started small and just went to the local café. You used to frequent it back in the day, but times were changed, and yet, they were all the happier to serve you the same as before. Getting cozy in the corner, you set up camp and ordered your favorite coffee basically every other hour - letting the day waste away as you caught up on work emails.
Might've wasted time on Instagram and Facebook and Pinterest. Got shopping done on Amazon. Browsed through Target's online selection. Checked out the sale items at Kate Spade. Perused Fenty Lingerie because you could.
Before you knew it, a message was coming in over your MacBook from Bucky, asking where you were - why had you turned your location off?
You packed up and with a to-go cup, made the short trek back home. When you got back, Bucky was pacing in the living room; staring at his phone and typing, then deleting, retyping, groaning, glancing up, typing again, then doing a double take. "Where've you been, Peach? Huh!?" Bucky demanded. "You're late!"
"Out with Nat," you eased.
He huffed through his nose, nodding slowly, "You have a nice time?"
"It was okay," you answered. "I'm gonna go to bed after I shower."
His brows furrowed, "I have a meeting tonight."
"I know."
"O...kay?" He let you go, wanting to ask why you didn't ask him to join like you had so often in the past few weeks.
And it didn't stop there, in fact, it got worse. When Bucky got home from his meeting, he was actually shocked to see you nestled in the bed; teetering on the edge of the shared space while snuggling a weighted body pillow.
When he tried to give you a snuggle, you stirred to life and pushed him back, muttering, "Too hot."
The following morning, he was relatively surprised to see you up and about before him; barely getting a word in before you were slipping out the door to go on a morning jog. He was confused by how all of a sudden, where you were once everywhere he looked, now, you were disappeared and distant and gone. You worked out alone, cooked alone - but always left him a plate, but long gone were the cute little sticky notes you left for him. You once haunted the apartment by never wanting to leave, and now, ghosted in and out of it on a daily basis.
You never bothered to go far from home. You liked hanging at the coffee shop and luckily, your job let you work from home most days, and the rare time you were due back in the office, it was only about a 20 minute walk. You got better at lying, couldn't even remember the last time you and Bucky had sex, and even now, the last time you had a meal together. You didn't text him about your day; where you once might've told him about an adorable dog you saw on the street, now, you only ever texted him if he asked a direct question.
Food lost appeal, your appetite vanished.
Sleep evaded you, plaguing you with nightmares when you did rest.
Interest dulled, passions were snuffed, and only fearful, confused anger remained. It showed in the way weight seemed to shift around your body, thinning; the lack of sleep creating dark rings and bags under your bloodshot eyes.
After two weeks of this, Bucky grew irritated and short with everyone around him. It reflected in his work, the way he spoke to everyone; even Steve and Sam getting the brunt end of his anger. Without you to assure him, Bucky was off his rocker; losing his cool; his patience stretched far too thin. So much so, the two mates approached an outside associate, Natasha Romanoff, after a particularly snappy meeting to plead for her to talk to Bucky.
"James," Nat greeted as she strode into his office without knocking.
"I know you're my oldest friend, but you don't have that privilege yet," he mused, never looking up.
"What?"
"Not knocking. What is it, Nat?"
"Just came to check on you, you know, like friends do."
"Hm," he chuckled without humor, "and what did Peach say to you?"
"About...?"
"Me."
"Nothing, I haven't gotten ahold of her for weeks."
Bucky paused, slowly lifting his head in confusion; brows furrowed and mouth set in a firm, straight line. "What?" He grit.
"Huh?" Nat wondered.
"She's been telling me that she's hanging out with you for the past two weeks," he revealed.
"Nope, not since the incident with HYDRA."
Bucky's (right) flesh hand crushed the pen in his grip, taking a long breath. "All right," he sighed, "so, why come today?"
"What's really going on, Buck?" She worried softly. "Is it really whatever's going on with Peach? You're this pissed off? What'd she even do?"
"She just..." He cut himself off with a long sigh. "It's nothing."
"Bucky," Nat gave a pointed look.
"She's just avoiding me," he muttered. "It's like she's barely home, almost like a ghost."
"Isn't that what you wanted?"
"Yes, and no," Bucky snipped, rolling his neck out. "I'm just worried about her now, she's never not communicated before."
"Something's bothering her," Nat shrugged. "She probably needs you right now, Buck."
"I can't do it all," he whispered. "I can't be who she wants and run this organization at the same time."
"She doesn't need that, she just needs you to be her partner," Natasha spoke softly. "She needs to feel loved and supported, and surely, she maybe felt weird about whatever you were projecting. Instead of taking it out on your men," she smirked, "why don't you just talk to her? 'Cause I hear you're bein' a more-than-usual asshole lately. You need to ease up or get laid, 'cause you're taking it out on good, loyal men, and that's entirely unfair."
"They can take it."
"Sure, but they shouldn't have to," Nat rolled her eyes. "Look, since you won't answer me, I'm assuming the sour mood is in regard to whatever relationship issues you have right now?"
"Sure," he tossed the pen away, opened a skinny drawer to his right and select an identical one.
"Bucky," she growled.
He sighed, "She's lying to me, Nat. Saying she's with you when she's not... Is this an affair? She's gone all the time now."
"No way," Nat laughed. "Baby girl doesn't have the energy to entertain anyone - let alone two men. You're just the exception."
"Why lie, then?"
"Maybe she didn't want you questioning her..."
"No shit."
"Well, did you get into a fight?"
"No."
"Any reason she doesn't want to be home?"
He shook his head with a sigh, "Not that I know of."
"You had to do something."
"Honest, I haven't. She was being all clingy, but then one day, a switch flipped."
Nat frowned, "You think... Your girlfriend is being clingy... Because she was kidnapped and beaten up... Because of your fucking job... And is probably scared...out of...her mind...? I get that correct?"
Bucky paused for a long moment, muttering, "Oh, my God."
"Yeah, you asshole. Think of it that way! She's afraid!" Natasha snapped. "And probably picked up on your energy, so, she made herself scarce."
"I didn't mean - "
"I don't care, go home, apologize to that sweet angel - she doesn't deserve this."
Bucky paused, "What is 'this' exactly?"
"James. Focus on the present - your woman. Go make this right. We all know you're this big, bad dude - but it's okay to be a little sensitive towards the woman who loves you without condition!"
Bucky relented, figuring the redheaded Russian mobster was right.
The entire drive home, Bucky considered the ways you had changed in the few, short weeks since he vented to Sam and Steve about your clinginess. You didn't take meals with him, didn't cook, work-out, or do anything you used to do together. Sex? Forget it. Dates? Nope. Cuddling? No, you're always 'too hot'. And when he thought about it, he remembers seeing the wads of cash he'd leave for you stuffed in his sock drawer - surely trying to make him think it was just another emergency fund he had hidden. You never spent his money, feeling humiliated by his choice of words.
Clingy...
You didn't text or call him when he was gone, you hadn't even so much as kissed him in what felt like ages... Well, more like you hadn't initiated any kisses...
His heart weighed in his chest as he realized he hadn't even so much as hugged you in days. You were rarely in the apartment together, and when you were, you were just silent and busy with chores. It was as if you operated on the exact opposite schedule as he did, went to new extents to avoid him, and his heart clenched in his chest.
When he got home, you were caught cooking in the kitchen - being obvious that you weren't expecting him. The door slammed and his baritone voice snapped, "Peach!"
You gulped, holding the sauce-covered wooden spoon to your chest. When he rounded around the corner, he found you and slowed down, sighing in relief. "What's wrong?" You worried in a timid tone.
He panted lightly, relaying, "Needed to find you."
"I'm here."
"I know," he relented, charging up to you and engulfing you in a tight, heavy hug. "I needed to talk to you, Peach," he whispered.
"What's wrong?"
"You. You're what's wrong."
"What the fuck does that - "
"No, no," he pulled back to stare down at you fondly, "I don't mean it like that, just that... You're struggling. I can see that. But you're not alone, I'm here with you, and I got a little caught up in my head when I realized someone was so very dependent on me - it fucking scared me. But then... Then you just shut yourself off and hid away from me, and oh, my God, it's so much worse, baby. Don't do that," he breathed, "okay? Don't ever shut me out - don't stop loving me, don't stop talking to me, don't give up on us. I can't read your mind, you can't read mine, it's not an excuse - but we understand better when we trust each other enough to communicate what's required. I'm so sorry I got caught up in myself, I didn't know what you needed - but I'm here now, I'm here - I'm not leaving you."
You collapsed into his chest, taking a shuddering breath.
"Don't ever stop talking to me, Peach," Bucky whispered, kissing the top of your head; keeping you close. "I'm so sorry, baby, if I - "
"If?" You snapped, pulling back to glare at him through your tears. "I heard you, Bucky. I heard you talking to Sam and Steve, and about how clingy I am."
"I was wrong," he insisted. "I was overwhelmed and tired and just stretched thin, the easiest thing to do is attack those closest to me, and that's you. It's not right, it's the worst I could do to you after all you've been through, and I'm so sorry. I was wrong, you're not the person to take this out on - and I'm so sorry, Peach."
You sighed, "I don't mean to be... I don't mean to cling - "
"Nah," he chuckled, caressing your cheek, "you cling as much as you want. Cling as tight as you want, baby, don't let me go. I'm sorry for what I said and the way it made you feel, it was wrong - so fucking wrong of me, and I see that. When you pulled away from me, I just... I couldn't think. It felt so wrong, and I knew it was my fault." He took your face in both palms, promising, "I'm so sorry, Peach."
You shrugged meekly, "It's okay."
"It's not."
"No, but apologizing is a step in the right direction."
He nodded, "What else can I do?"
"Nothing - "
"Peach."
You paused to think, smiling shyly, "Movie night?"
"Whatever my pretty girl wants," he nodded.
"Hmm... Get a bath with me?"
"All right... Sure, okay..."
"And face masks."
He sighed, "Okay."
"And mani-pedis."
"Baby."
"You said you were making it up to me, right?"
He smirked, "That's right... All right, yeah, sure, fine, we can..." He sighed again, "We can do all that, Peach, whatever you want."
"I just want you," you told him softly. "I didn't mean to be so clingy. I was just afraid... I felt afraid everyday, just so very unsure in this life. You're the only thing that makes sense to me, Buck, and when I heard you, I just... I guess I realized how dependent I'd been and wanted to give you space. Last thing I want is to smother you, to drive you away from me."
"Not ever gonna happen," he promised softly. "I just didn't handle it like I should've. I'm sorry, Peach, but I'm here now - for whatever you need. Want me to take a few days off, just be together? I'll arrange it. Want to get away for a bit? We can go."
"I just need you," you whispered. "Only you and I should be okay - I can be okay if I have you, but feeling like I lost you? Even a fraction? Buck... James, it was such a harrowing feeling, I wasn't sure what to do to move forward. So, I think I just panicked, shut down; thought if I could just get back to normal, you'd love me again..."
"I never stopped loving you," he swore, "I just had a bad lapse in my own judgement. Nothing against you, baby. Nothing."
You nodded again, letting him tuck you into his chest; perfectly snug under his chin as he coiled his arms around you. He let out a long sigh, his guilt swelling to new heights, but for that present moment, everything seemed okay.
Felt okay.
Appeared okay.
And you'd both do whatever it took to remain as okay as you possibly could.
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requesting rules and masterlist
Marvel masterlist
Clingy Baby collection masterlist
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keyotosprompts · 2 months
Text
we were somewhere else *ੈ𑁍༘⋆
established relationship dialogue prompts
⇴ "were you thinking about eating that?" "yes... why? wait. you were planning on eating it, weren't you." (and they still end up giving their partner a share of their food)
⇴ "really? we've been together for [x] years and you're still worried about that?"
⇴ "wait–why didn't we hear anything about this?" "you and person b were in your own little happy, coupley, rainbow-sunshine world!"
⇴ "okay, let's put the laptop away. we're going to bed."
⇴ "i feel awful. like literal death." "that's why i told you to always wear a jacket. now you've caught a cold. now let me take care of you, babe."
⇴ "no, i'm not doing that," and they do it anyway.
⇴ "your feet are freezing!" and they jolt when their partner's feet touches them.
⇴ "sometimes i don't know what i would've done if i haven't met you. it's like i need you, because if you're not here, it's like i can't even breathe."
⇴ "honestly, i think if you fell over right now, i'd laugh." "would you help me up?" "i suppose so."
⇴ "you've had me since day one. i know i like to say that you're entranced by me, but i've always been marveled by you."
⇴ "i miss you, will you come back to bed?"
⇴ "why are you trailing your fingers across my face?" "just wanted to admire you. you're really cute, did you know that?"
⇴ "out of everyone in my life, you're my person–the most important one. nothing tops you."
⇴ "did you use the last bit of my shampoo?" "technically, we both used it all–y'know, when we showered together–" (a pillow is thrown)
⇴ "this combined playlist is really mid, and i think i know who ruined it..." "do not slander chopin right now." "it's piano music mixed with rap!"
⇴ "i haven't told you this, but did you know that you inspire me?" "me? are you serious? what have i done to inspire you?" "everything you do for me. all the work you put into your work and your relationships. all those little things: every day, i want to be just like you."
⇴ "you remembered!!" "babe, that's the bare minimum."
⇴ "those could be our kids one day." "what...?" (person b malfunctions bc they've been thinking about kids w/ a for a while)
⇴ "i want a house by the beach. with big windows." "and a good kitchen." "oh of course. way better than ours."
⇴ "so it's going to be like this forever? you and me?" "who else?"
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mostlymarvelsstuff · 3 months
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Reader recives Buckys nudes accidentally
Authors note: The one MCU man I'd be with (Well, and Nomad Steve)
Word count: 710 Marvel Masterlist How They React To Masterlist
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   Bucky couldn't help but be a bit proud of himself. He'd just returned from a hanging out with Sam, and the man had helped him finally figure out how to take a selfie. So now, even though it had taken a while and some help, he was able to take a decent picture of himself that he actually liked. And having been successful with technology once tonight, he decides that he's going to push his luck at furthering this understanding and enjoyment of it, by attempting to figure out how to send it to you.
   You're always so kind to him, have been since day one really, and you're always excited when he takes steps towards getting caught up by learning new things. He's very appreciative of it, and you. It makes him feel good and like his accomplishments, no matter how small, do matter. 
  However, that earlier feeling of accomplishment he had quickly goes away when he reviews the outgoing message that had just sent. Now all he feels is dread and embarrassment, because he had sent you the entirely wrong picture. Instead of getting his smirking face, you’ll be getting an admittedly blurry picture of his boxer clad legs with his hardened dick poking out the fly as his flesh hand wraps around it.
   “That…that is not the one I sent. I didn't…oh fuck”
   What's he supposed to do here? What's he supposed to say? He certainly didn’t want you to feel disrespected by this mistake, he wasn’t some asshole that wanted to boost his ego by gaining attention over his dick. But he certainly felt like he would come off that way. Even if he explained himself, he feared you would think he wasn't being truthful. 
   His scowl deepens and he flexes his vibranium fingers out of nervousness as he contemplates the situation. Maybe Steve was right, maybe he should have just gotten a flip phone. Surely then he wouldn't be in this predicament. But no, he had to listen to Sam and Tony and get a ‘smart phone’. What was so damn smart about it if it couldn’t even send the right picture?
   Over in the gym, you had just finished your workout and were standing by your locker to gather your change of clothes so you could shower when your phone buzzed on the bench. You finish wiping off your forehead with the towel before picking up your phone to see what was up. You smile when you see the notification from Bucky, as it always warmed your heart to see the man getting to rediscover life and the new aspects of it, and unlock your screen to see what he’d sent.
   Your eyes nearly pop out of your head when you see the picture and you quickly exit your messages to glance around and make sure no one else is close enough to see what you'd been sent. Satisfied with everyone's distance you re open the picture, and despite its blurriness you can tell the man is very well endowed.  And though you really do like what you see, there is no doubt in your mind that you were not meant to receive this. Bucky never even caught on to your subtle flirting, so there was no way he’d be bold enough for this.
   This wasn’t meant for me, was it?
   He stares at the text for an unknown amount of time, it felt like a trap. If he said yes, but you hadn’t liked it or him, it would ruin your friendship. But if he said no, and you were interested in him, he’d be blowing his shot with you. 
   Bucky?
   He falls back against his mattress with a sigh, he might as well be truthful, This wasn’t what I meant to send, no. But I’d be lying if I said that I wasn’t thinking about you when I took it.
   Your face heats up and butterflies erupt in your belly, Well, I just happen to have some free time. Maybe you can elaborate on what other feelings you have when you think of me
   Only if you promise me that Sam never hears about how bad I screwed up or how mushy I can be
 You chuckle, I wouldn’t tell a soul
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megalony · 16 days
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Baby-Trapped
This is an Evan buckley imagine requested by anon, I really enjoyed writing this and couldn't wait to post it! So you all have two imagines in one day. Let me know what you think.
Taglist: @justagirlthatlovedtoread @musicistheway @avada-kedavra-bitch-187 @luula @missdreamofendless @bradleybeachbabe @woderfulkawaii  @amberpanda99 @daggersquadphantom @marvel-and-chicago-fan @angryknightstatesmantrash @minjix @lyjen @kmc1989 @itsmytimetoodream @noonenuts @hiireadstuff @ashie-babie @classyunknownlover @jayyeahthatsme @sp1ritssz @dumb-fawkin-bitch @oliverstarksbae @gimatida @heart-35 @supernaturalstilinski @stefansalvatoresgf @kyky9103 @wutheringhearts2275 @gay4hotmilfs @itshamleth @chaoticnosleepinfluencer @gs29 @wh0reforsmutstuff @mel-vaz @natashamea18 @chrisevansdaughter @alexandra8484 @deena-beena-weena @targaryenluvs @shelbygeek @kpoplover-19 @marvelmenarebeautiful @gillybear17
Evan Buckley Masterlist
Summary: (Y/n) distances herself from Evan when the people at her college believe he shouldn't be with someone younger and inexperienced like her. But things change when she falls pregnant.
Enjoy.
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"There's my girl, you okay?"
(Y/n) tilted her head back on the sofa at the sound of Evan's voice drifting softly through the apartment. She smiled softly when she watched him approach from the hallway.
Her eyes fell closed and she stayed still when Evan leaned over the back of the sofa and moved his hands to her shoulders. He gave a loving squeeze and pressed his lips against her temple. (Y/n) could feel each ragged breath he took and how his chest was heaving behind the sofa, against the back of her neck and head.
His lips curved into a smile against her temple and she felt his nose tickle her skin. He was sweating. Nothing new, he had just been out jogging like he usually did after a night shift.
"Hm, good shift?" She squeaked when Evan leaned over her and stole her lips for a searing, panting kiss. While Evan had been on the night shift, he said (Y/n) could stay here at his place, save her having to get the bus home and then come back up this way today for college.
"An easy shift, for a change. I got some sleep too, which is a shocker. Do you want a ride to class?" Evan wasn't used to getting an hours sleep in the bunker room at the station, but it had been such a lovely change to actually recouperate and sleep. He felt more alive for the small callouts they went on and it wasn't all hustle and bustle.
He felt lively enough when he parked up to head straight out on his run and get it over and done with. Now he would have the afternoon to either do some exercises or just relax and wait until (Y/n)'s class was over.
Their schedules hadn't aligned recently, Evan had picked up extra shifts at the station because they were down three people. And his shifts didn't match up with (Y/n)'s college classes. But they were making things work.
"You've just come home, I can walk, it's fine." (Y/n) uncurled her legs and slumped her feet back down to the floor, but she froze when Evan's arms suddenly caged around her. Both arms looped around her upper chest and his chest pressed into the back of the sofa so he could tuck his face into her neck.
When she felt his teeth graze her skin, her shoulders pulled up and she fought off a smile.
"No, I'll drop you off baby." What was the point in (Y/n) walking all that way if Evan could just drive her there himself?
(Y/n) nodded, but she could feel her smile trying to disappear. She didn't want the girls in her class to see Evan drop her off.
Two girls had already twigged that Evan was a firefighter, more specifically, one they had seen being interviewed multiple times on the TV. If he dropped her off, the rumours would get worse.
(Y/n) loved Evan. She loved him to the end of the Earth, he was funny, loving, caring and sweet and he made her feel like the only person worth loving in the world. But he was older than her. Evan had everything sorted, he had a steady job, a home, a car, friends his own age and all of his friends were already settled down and married and happy in their lives.
It never bothered (Y/n), until the girls in her class started talking about her. They seemed to think there was no point in Evan dating (Y/n). They acted as if he was with her out of pity or because he didn't know what he really wanted, and they thought (Y/n) was using him. If he took her to class, the girls would see and then everyone would just agree that (Y/n) was using Evan to her advantage.
"I'll grab a shower and get changed before we go. Care to join me?"
His lips trailed down (Y/n)'s neck until he was pressing wet, hollow kisses over her shoulder. And his hands slithered down her waist and scrunched up her shirt so his cold fingers could travel across her bare skin. His touch made her shiver and she tried to smile. It was tempting. It was more than tempting.
Getting a shower with Evan was always an exciting experience. (Y/n) could still feel the ache in her shoulders from last time where he picked her up and pinned her to the shower wall.
But if she turned up to class with wet, damp hair and smelling of Evan and sex it wouldn't go down well. Taking a shower with him would make her late, too. Time got lost when they were together and (Y/n) didn't want to be late. She only had a few months left of college and then she would have her degree. She could get a job and be done with the people in her class and feel more grown up and more suitable to be Evan's partner.
"No, I don't wanna be late."
"Baby…" He groaned into her shoulder while his fingertips slid into her jeans and wiggled past her underwear. He grinned like a catfish into her skin when she gasped and pushed back against him.
"Later. Go get ready."
She trailed her hand up to card her fingers through his damp curls, scratching her nails down his neck which made him bite down on her neck.
"Okay." Evan pulled away from her neck and moved his hands to her hips, but he could feel his smile fading when she didn't look at him.
She didn't usually turn his offers down. When she saw him after being separated by shifts and classes, (Y/n) usually attached herself to him. He didn't have to try to get her attention or fight for a kiss like this. Evan didn't like how (Y/n) was starting to distance from him. It was just the little things he was noticing and he was sure it was only because she was preoccupied with something.
He pressed his finger beneath her chin and turned her head so he could capture her in a quick kiss before he finally parted and headed upstairs to grab a change of clothes.
(Y/n) packed her notebooks and revision cards into her bag while she heard Evan hop in the shower.
She looped her bag on her shoulder and headed towards the kitchen. Her eyes cast towards the bathroom and she waited a second to make sure Evan wasn't about to walk out before she looked through her bag. Once she found the small square pill box, she popped one of the tiny orange pills into her hand and chugged it down.
She didn't want Evan seeing the box. He was a firefighter, he had medical knowledge and if he knew what she was taking, he would know what it was for. (Y/n) didn't want to tell him yet.
"Alright baby, are we ready?" Evan dragged his fingers through his hair, shaking loose the last few droplets of water before he looked down.
He fiddled with his belt, popping it through the tightest loop he could before he got his trainers on and looked towards the kitchen.
With his keys looped on his thumb, Evan held his other hand out towards (Y/n) and smiled when she entwined their hands and pulled his arm against her chest. She leaned her head on his shoulder and followed him out the apartment.
Evan spared a few glances at (Y/n) every now and then as he drove. He didn't like the distant, somewhat panicked look on her face. She had one hand tangled in her hair and her forehead resting against the window with her other arm around her waist and her knees pushed up.
He ran his hand along his jaw before he dared to reach out and place his hand on her thigh. When she didn't react nor push him away, Evan gave her thigh a squeeze and started gliding his fingertips up and down her inner thigh. He could tell his touch relaxed her somewhat, she stopped tensing her leg so tight and she shrunk down in the seat.
"What time do you finish, I'll come pick you up if you want."
"You don't have to, it's your day off babe-"
"Yeah, and I wanna spend some time with you. I wanna come get you, no one said I have to."
He wasn't asking because he felt obliged, he was asking because he wanted to pick her up. She was his girl and he would rather come get her than her having to walk or get the bus and if she ever wanted a lift, all she had to do was ask. Evan was never going to say no or be angry if she asked him.
"I finish at two." She murmured softly as she turned to face him. "Thank you."
(Y/n) sat forward in her seat and clicked her spine into place when Evan pulled up on the curb. She undid her belt and looped her bag over her shoulder before she turned to lean across towards him.
Her stomach jolted with adrenaline when Evan's hand cupped her jaw and his thumb pulled at her lower lip. His nose brushed hers and he stole a kiss, nipping at her lip so she couldn't pull away without a fight.
"I'll see you later, love you."
"Hm, good." He spoke quietly against her lips, stealing another two kisses until (Y/n) finally gave him a nudge in the chest so she could get out. "Love you too, see you later sexy."
Her lips curved into a grin that morphed with a gasp when she opened the door and felt his hand on her bum.
She gave the door a nudge, tightening her bag strap on her shoulder as she watched Evan drive away. As soon as Evan turned the corner, (Y/n)'s stomach gave an awful twist and she suddenly wanted to call out for him and make him turn around. She wanted to climb back into the jeep and go back home with him when a flock of familiar faces caught her eye.
Oh no.
It was the four girls from her class that (Y/n) tried her best not to hang around. The ones who were like little teenagers, always vying for attention from anyone, any boy, any teacher, any passing person. The girls who acted like gossip was the currency in this place and being nosey was their passtime.
"Hi (Y/n)."
"Hi," Her voice was quiet and meek as she pulled her bag closer and tried to power walk ahead. She wanted to get to class and get sat down before everyone else filtered in.
"Was that your fella?" When (Y/n) nodded, Carla smiled and moved to walk beside her. "He's a looker, how old is he? Looks like he's in his thirties."
(Y/n) cringed and tried to walk ahead, but it was no use. They were all going in the same direction, to the same class. She couldn't run ahead without them without causing a fuss or making them realise they unnerved her and she didn't want to be around them.
"He is, isn't he?" Sandra added in with glee when (Y/n) rolled her lips together and didn't respond.
"He's thirty-one." She kept her voice quiet and her eyes focused on the pavement as they headed towards the college building.
This was why (Y/n) hated being around people like them. They made such a fuss when it wasn't really anything to fuss about. Yes, Evan was older than (Y/n), but he was only nine years older than her. That wasn't such a big gap, (Y/n) knew people with twelve or even fifteen years between them. There was less than a decade separating her and Evan, and it wasn't like it was a bad thing.
(Y/n) wasn't a teenager still in school, she was almost finished with her college degree now and then she would be on the same path as Evan, finding a steady job like he had. And Evan didn't really act his age, nor did he actually look his age like Carla insinuated, she was only probing for information.
"Isn't he a firefighter?" Carla looked over her shoulder as if Evan was still sat there in his jeep. He would be halfway back home by now. He wasn't there for them to ogle at or play twenty questions with him like they were doing now with (Y/n).
They had seen him on the tv.
Evan had done a lot of interviews over the years, mainly just little ones to say the team had gotten a victim out alive or that everyone was okay and they had no casualties. But with all the stunts he had done on the job, he had been in the paper more than once.
"Well that's a way to further yourself."
Sandra's voice made (Y/n) stop in her tracks. She turned to the left and looked over at the blonde as if she had grown a second head. She was the one who kept talking whenever Evan dropped (Y/n) off. She was the one who said she couldn't fathom why someone like Evan was with a 'little girl like (Y/n)'.
"What?" What did she mean by that? What was she talking about?
"You can get to know a lot of people, being with him. I bet he's got a lot of connections. And that's good for your image, upcoming nurse latched onto a hot, older fireman."
"It's not-"
"I bet he's got his own place, right? That's why you always get a lift, you stay at his place?"
Her blood ran cold and Her knees started to shake as if they had turned to jelly. Why was she being like this? Why were the other girls agreeing with her? Why couldn't they just walk away knowing that (Y/n) was happy with Evan? This was nothing to do with them but they seemed to be poking their noses in because they wanted to stir up trouble.
"Because he's my partner." Her voice was low as her words seethed through gritted teeth. Evan was her partner, she had every right to stay over at his place when she wanted to see him and be with him. She practically lived there. Evan was always inviting her round and when he picked her up from class he automatically took her back to his place.
She only seemed to go home if Evan was on a long stint of shifts or if she wanted to get some more clothes and do some washing.
"I get it… you've latched onto a goldmine there."
A wave of sickness washed over (Y/n) and she pushed her feet to move faster before she collapsed down on her knees. She sped away from them and bolted down the corridor, not caring if anyone looked her way and wondered what on Earth she was doing.
It was none of their business about her and Evan. She was with him because she loved him. (Y/n) wasn't using Evan, she wasn't trying to be with him because she thought he would advance her career or introduce her to smart people. Or because he was older with his own money and his own place and a good job.
None of that was true, but it didn't matter because none of those girls were going to believe (Y/n). Not when they had it in their minds that Evan was a successful, handsome fireman who had no reason to be with (Y/n).
***
Sinking back on her heels, (Y/n) slumped her head back against the toilet wall and coiled both her arms around her waist. The back of her throat was aching and torn apart from how much she had just thrown up and the acidic taste in her mouth made her grimace.
She was going to make herself late for class if she stayed in here much longer. But on the other hand, (Y/n) couldn't go into class if she still felt like she had more to throw up. Being sick in class was the last thing she needed right now.
Her hands moved to the wall and she used it as leverage to stand up on shaking legs. She grabbed her bag from the hook on the wall and unlocked the door, stumbling out the cubicle over towards the sinks.
Leaning over, she took a few sips of water from the sink before she moved her bag and rummaged around for the familiar box of tablets.
(Y/n) barely took the tiny orange tablet before the toilet door opened and someone walked in.
"You look rough."
(Y/n) refrained from rolling her eyes and took another sip of water to wash the tablet down. Her eyes widened and a gasp rolled past her lips when Sandra suddenly grabbed the box from her hands.
What was she doing? Why was she taking (Y/n)'s tablets? How rude could she get to lean across and snatch them from her like she thought they were illicit drugs instead of prescribed medication.
"Oh, well done."
"Leave me alone." (Y/n) snatched the box back so tightly she began to crumple the cardboard in her grip. She tossed it back in her bag and closed her eyes, willing herself to remain calm and not shed any tears here in front of someone she was growing to despise.
She didn't want anyone finding out. She hadn't even talked to Evan yet. That was why she kept the folic acid hidden in her bag so Evan wouldn't see. If he saw them, he would form the same conclusion Sandra had right now.
(Y/n) was pregnant.
"I didn't believe the others, about your big fireman until we watched him pick you up the other day. Now I know why."
"You don't know anything-"
"I know he's not going to be able to leave you now. A little girl, having his baby. He'll have to stick by you. What a way to make sure that eligible fireman doesn't find someone better, more mature than you. Baby-trap him so he can't leave you."
She wouldn't answer. She wouldn't give Sandra the satisfaction. but she could feel tears welling up in her eyes when she realised the toilet door had opened again. Tina was stood there. At least it was someone (Y/n) knew and trusted. Tina was the only person (Y/n) would trust with this news, they were close friends but (Y/n) hadn't told anyone about this yet.
She hadn't worked out what she was going to do or found a way to tell Evan without him coming to the same conclusion as Sandra had.
Now she was going to go and tell everyone in their class and soon enough it would be all round the college that (Y/n) was pregnant. Everyone would be saying the same thing as Sandra because no one really knew (Y/n) or anything about her relationship with Evan and this was gossip, not fact.
"Sandra, back off with those jealous accusations." Tina folded her arms over her chest but she didn't get two steps into the toilets before (Y/n) ran past her.
She didn't care about class anymore. She didn't care about missing their next class.
There was no way (Y/n) was going to sit there while Sandra spread this news around everyone. She couldn't have them looking and staring at her and whispering behind her back. (Y/n) would rather go home and wallow in self-pity and think what she was going to do.
But she didn't know what she was going to do, or how Evan was going to react to something like this.
***
Evan lifted his gaze from his phone to look ahead of him. He slouched his hips back against the jeep and took a look around. When he messaged (Y/n) last night during his shift all he got was short replies. But he managed to get her to agree for him to pick her up after her class today.
She wasn't out yet. She was usually out on time, she didn't hang around for anyone, she liked to be straight out and back home as quickly as possible.
He shoved his phone back in his pocket when his eyes landed on Tina. Evan didn't know her very well, but he knew her to say hello to, and he knew she was (Y/n)'s closest friend.
"Hi."
"Hey Buck, you're not here for (Y/n), are you?" Her words made his shoulders slump and knots formed in his stomach.
"Why?"
"She missed class today, yesterday too."
That wasn't normal. (Y/n) was never one to miss class. A few months back she caught a chest infection, she could barely breathe or stay awake and she ran a fever. And Evan had to stop her from leaving the apartment to try and get to class on time. Even when she was ill she still tried her best to attend classes so it wasn't like her to not turn up.
And she told Evan she would be at class today. She told him she had gone yesterday and said he could pick her up. So either something had happened or she really wasn't feeling like herself and had decided to skip. Either way, Evan didn't like the thought or the outcome he was going to get.
"She's not been herself lately… has she said anything to you, I'm worried about her."
He didn't like the look he got in return. Tina bit down on her lip and looked down at her shoes before she sighed. Her foot began to tap against the pavement and she slumped her shoulders and dropped her weight onto one leg as her nails scratched along her arm.
She didn't want to have to tell Evan, but she knew if she didn't, (Y/n) wasn't likely to either. And he needed to know what was going on so he could help (Y/n) and try to sort this out with her.
"Some of the people on campus started asking her about you, they um… they started saying stuff, when they found out you're older, and what you do for a living." That was the nicest way Tina could think of wording it without upsetting or angering Evan. And she knew it was never her place to tell him that (Y/n) might be pregnant.
She had tried messaging and calling (Y/n) after class yesterday but she never answered. Considering what Tina had heard in the toilets, she wanted to know if (Y/n) was okay and if it was true, but she'd heard nothing from her.
"What kind of stuff?"
"That she's with you for status and money- stupid stuff that's not true, but it really upset her. I think you need to talk to her."
"Fuck." Evan dragged his hand through his hair and down over his jaw that clicked from side to side. "I know where she'll be."
When he worked double shifts, he told (Y/n) she could stay at his place even if he wasn't there. It was closer to the college and it was somewhere she could study in peace and be alone and then she would be there when he came home. He loved coming home to her.
He had a gut feeling that if (Y/n) was in a state and was this upset, she would go to his place. He prayed that she would be at his place because then he wouldn't have to ring her and go searching for her. He needed to talk to her and make sure she was alright because this didn't sound good, it sounded frightening.
"Ask her to call me, so I know she's alright, please?"
"Course I will."
It didn't take him long to drive down to the apartment and part of Evan wished he had gone home before going to the college. But grabbing a shower after shift and then having a coffee with Eddie and Hen had taken longer than he expected and he thought he was going to be late to pick (Y/n) up. He knew if he was late she would presume he was still at work and try to walk or get the bus home.
Once he got to the apartment, trepidation flooded his veins and he almost didn't want to open the door.
He cautiously headed inside and took a look around. Her shoes and bag were by the door, so were her keys which meant she was here. Thank God. That was one less thing for him to worry about; he knew where she was and that she was safe.
"Baby?"
He headed towards the stairs, about to walk into the living room but he stopped when he heard the tv on upstairs. (Y/n) didn't usually watch tv up in bed in the middle of the afternoon like this. He grabbed the bannister and used it to propell himself up the stairs two at a time.
It didn't take long for Evan to lock his eyes on (Y/n). She was curled up in the middle of the bed, her knees coiled up and her arms wrapped around a pillow that she was cradling to her chest like it was a teddy.
When he walked over, Evan could feel his heart trying to break free from his chest.
She was crying.
Staying silent, he quietly walked over to the bed and sank down on the side. He waited for (Y/n) to acknowledge that he was there before he leaned over her and slipped his hands beneath her arms so he could try and move her. (Y/n) stayed limp and let Evan lift her up so he could lay her over his lap instead and he gently moved the pillow so she could hug him instead.
He was relieved when (Y/n) shuffled round to properly hug him. She imbedded her face into his abdomen and coiled her arms around his waist, digging her fingers into his back.
Evan leaned down and pressed a kiss to the top of her head, curving both his arms around her with his hand soothingly rubbing up and down her back.
"Baby, talk to me. What's going on, hm?" He stayed doubled over with his lips meshed into her temple until his back started to ache. When he pulled back, he started to card his fingers through her hair, brushing tendrils away from her face that was still mostly smothered in his shirt.
"Just… just a low mood, I'm okay."
Why was she trying to hide this from him? They didn't have the kind of relationship where they felt they couldn't confide in each other. Evan told (Y/n) anything and everything that was on his mind, whether it was good or bad. He thought she felt the same.
"I talked to Tina today. She told me what those girls in your class were saying." He tried to keep his tone light to make sure (Y/n) knew he wasn't trying to start an argument or come across as rude. He was just trying to understand.
He opened his arms when (Y/n) started to move and waited for her to sit up so they could talk properly. But her shoulders were quaking and tears were now freely streaming down her face. Evan's breath caught in his throat when (Y/n) turned away from him and when she tried to swing her legs over the side of the bed, Evan reached out for her.
He hooked an arm around her waist and pulled her back so she couldn't try and leave. They needed to talk, avoiding this conversation wouldn't make it go away, it would only prolong the inevitable.
"No, no baby we need to talk about this. Is this why you've been nervous around me?"
He perched his chin on her shoulder and kept her back pressed into his chest while both arms secured around her waist so she was sitting on his lap. He felt her hands grip his wrists tightly and she tilted her head down so she was looking at her hands. At least with Evan behind her, (Y/n) didn't have to see his face fall when she tried to explain.
"They don't get why you're with me, but- but Sandra thinks I'm with you to use you… boost my image, or something like that." It felt silly to be getting upset over something so stupid, but (Y/n) couldn't help how she reacted or the way she felt.
Sandra's words had cut deep and if she thought like that and so did other people on campus, what were Evan's friends and colleagues going to say? What would his family think of her? Would they all think the same? Would they think she was using Evan? Was he going to end up thinking the same thing?
"They don't get it because this isn't their relationship. I love you, I love how I feel when I'm with you and how amazing and smart you are. Come on, baby, it doesn't matter what they say-"
"Evan I- I care what your friends will think, your team… if the girls think like that then-"
"Hey, they're not like that, I promise. Baby they won't think bad of you, they'll love you like I do. Does it bother you that I'm older? There's not even ten years between us… what's that face for?"
Evan kept his arms around (Y/n)'s middle but he let her shuffle round on his lap so she was facing him this time. He moved his hands to her legs and pulled on them until they were hooked around his torso and she was sat high on his hips with her abdomen pushing into his.
His hands wormed beneath her shirt and spread out on her back while (Y/n) hooked her arms around his neck.
They had never talked about the age difference being a problem for either of them. It didn't bother Evan, it was a number that barely made an impact on either of their lives. It wasn't as if Evan was middle-aged and (Y/n) was a teenager, they weren't at different points in their lives. And no one at the station was going to care.
They loved each other, they were happy together and more to the point, they were both good for each other. That's all the team at the station were going to see and care about and Evan knew they would be fine with (Y/n) and would welcome her with open arms.
"You know it doesn't, but I know what everyone's gonna say when they get to know me, Evan everyone will think I'm tying you down to me… that I- that I'm baby-trapping you. It's what Sandra said earlier."
She could barely breathe.
She'd done it. She'd taken the plunge and told him what was really bothering her and how their lives were now going to change.
(Y/n) could see it now. She could just see all of Evan's friends at the station telling him he was moving too fast with her. That she was a lovely girl, but she might be with him for the wrong reasons. They would think (Y/n) had planned this, that she was trying to leech off of Evan and keep him tied to her by having a baby with him. It was bad enough that everyone on campus was going to think like this, (Y/n) wouldn't have to see them for long before she graduated.
But she would have to see the people Evan worked with and see them stare at her and look her up and down with distaste. She would see them whisper about her.
Tears began to stream down (Y/n)'s face when Evan didn't say anything, he just stared at her with parted lips like he hadn't heard her or she had spoken in a foreign language. (Y/n) tightened her arms around his neck and leaned forward to hide her face in his neck. She breathed in his scent, trying to take deep breaths as Evan's chest rumbled.
"Baby I… I don't know what that means."
He felt the shiver that tore down her spine. Evan worked around older people, barring Ravi, Evan was one of the younger ones at the station. He didn't know a lot of the new terms floating around, it was normally Chris who told him what things meant.
Evan hadn't heard that one before and it made his stomach churn at how upset (Y/n) was getting about all of this.
"It's… it means I'm trapping you in a relationship with me, stopping you from leaving, by having a baby with you." (Y/n) hiccupped through her words, but she managed to say them all without too much hassle.
She leaned her head back enough to see Evan's reaction. She had to know if he was going to be angry or upset or if he might even believe she was baby-trapping him on purpose. (Y/n) couldn't think about anything or what they were going to do until she knew how Evan was going to feel about all of this.
"You're pregnant?"
"I'm so-"
Before (Y/n) could even fumble her way through an apology, a gasp tumbled past her lips when Evan pushed forward and pinned her down on her back on the bed.
He had one arm wormed beneath her waist and the other hand cupped the back of her neck as (Y/n) tried to catch her breath back. But she didn't have chance for a proper breath when Evan stole her lips in a kiss. He laid between her legs that hooked around his hips on instinct.
She could feel his abdomen pressing into hers, his chest meshed down against her own and his elbows jammed down into the bed so he didn't press all of his weight onto her and smother her. But the feeling of him laying on top of her like this was heaven; especially with the force and weight of his lips on hers.
(Y/n) tangled her fingers up in his hair and gave a sharp pull when she felt Evan's tongue slide past her lips with ease. His boney hips pushed into hers, pinning her so far down into the bed that she felt like there would be a mould of her body in the mattress when they eventually got up.
His teeth meshed against hers, his fingers tightened around the back of her neck and his hand pressed into her back, pulling her chest tighter into hers. (Y/n) could feel herself going lightheaded from lack of air and the weight of Evan pushing down on her. She dragged her tongue across his lower lip and finally pulled back for air, seeing black spots dance all around Evan when she tried to look up at him.
His baby blue eyes were a deeper, darker shade now that tears were glossing over his eyes. But it was the way his lips were twitched up into a dazed smile that made (Y/n)'s heart skip a beat.
"We're having a baby?"
"You're n-not mad at me?"
Evan laughed breathlessly and stole another kiss from her lips that felt like glue attaching to him and keeping him close. He moved his hand round from her neck to glide the pad of his finger beneath her eyes, swiping away a few stray tears. And he moved a few loose pieces of pair behind her ear so he could see her properly, fully.
"Sweetheart, this may surprise you but I had something to do with this too, it's not like you did this on your own or decided this was gonna happen. And why would I be mad? You know I love the bones of you… is this what you want?"
A sudden bolt of fear shot through to his heart at the thought that this wasn't what (Y/n) wanted.
But when he watched her lips curve into a smile and saw the tears begin to fall again, he sighed. She was nodding. This is what she wanted. He didn't quite know why she thought he would be angry with her. He loved her more than anything and she was his world. And Evan wanted kids, he wanted loads of them and he knew from the moment they got together that (Y/n) was the one for him.
"You, uh, do you wanna move in with me then, baby?" His grin made (Y/n)'s stomach jump.
This might not be the correct order to do things in, but they were doing this their way. And she practically lived here with Evan anyway, most of her things were here and she barely visited home. Moving in would just make things more official.
"Yes please- what are you doing?" (Y/n) tightened her arms around his neck and leaned up with him when he tilted back. She attached her lips to his jaw, watching him grin madly as he fumbled in his back pocket for his phone.
"Calling Maddie, I wanna introduce you so then I can start telling everyone I'm gonna be a dad."
Evan knew if he told Maddie about the news before he introduced her to (Y/n), she would scold him. He wanted to ask her round for tea, introduce them and try and see if he could hold back a few days, maybe a week. Once (Y/n) had had a scan, then he could go round shouting it from the rooftops and telling all his friends and family that it was finally happening.
He was going to have a baby with the girl of his dreams.
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hitomisuzuya · 3 days
Note
Can I have Scaramouche x reader, where it's Scaramouche's first time? Can either be while he's in the Fatui or as Wanderer 🫶🏻🫶🏻 thank you
Scaramouche x fem!reader. Smut. Riding. Creampie.
Fatui Scara for this one😌😳 Everyone, please enjoy your day and evening. My confidence is a bit shaky today, so bear with me. I think I got carried away though lol
Thoughts of you consumed Scaramouche every day and every night. It took him awhile to come to terms with the fact he was falling in love. He'd always thought love was a useless, filthy human emotion.
He didn't realize how much he needed it until he met you.
The intimate power you were starting to give to Scaramouche was intoxicating to him. Through a flurry of heavy, open mouthed kisses while he pinned you down on the bed underneath him, he asked if you wanted to fuck for the first time and you so readily agreed.
How delightful.
Your body was a blank canvas for him to mark up and explore. And that's exactly what his mouth and hands were. Exploring. Sussing out all the sensitive parts that would make you shiver and writhe if he focused on them.
Oh how Scaramouche had waited for this moment. To make you his in every way. Every filthy way he could imagine.
His hand traced the line of your throat, bringing goosebumps in their wake as they traveled down to her chest. His thumb skimmed over your nipple, marvelling at how velvety the nub felt as it hardened. The pads of his fingers closed around it, his teeth finding purchase on your neck.
Your body twitched, pressing up against his, your hips moving suddenly to grind against his cock. He smirked as he pulled a fold of skin between his teeth to suck on. He rolled and pinched your nipple, his ears keenly focused on the soft moans that were starting to meet his ears.
"So responsive," Scaramouche murmured in awe into your neck, pulling away and admiring the bruise he'd made so dominantly close to your throat. He prodded his tongue soothingly on your inflamed skin.
He licked a line down your throat, enjoying the way the body visibly tingled in his hands as he worked his way down to your chest. He slowly swirled his tongue around your nipple.
"Fucking hell, moan more for me," Scaramouche said softly, drool pooling down your breast as he took your nipple into his mouth to suck on.
You writhed on the bed underneath him. "Sc-Sca--" You wrapped your arms around him, pressing his mouth down onto your breast. The sensation of his mouth sucking on your sensitive nipple was making your head start to feel fuzzy.
Scaramouche's eyes snapped open. The audacity of you to sound so cute and needy for him. Had the burst of pleasure overwhelmed you so much that you were incapable of saying his name?
He needed more of that. His cock pulsed between his legs, and he suddenly came to a realization. That you are the only for him. And what almost sickened him was that he'd known it all along.
The way you relaxed so submissively under him as he put some of his weight on you to reach between your legs sent him reeling. Your body curled into his touches, your hips jerking up to grind against them as he parted your drooling folds.
"So wet," He marvelled, his fingers exploring on your pussy. How fast you were soaking against them made him harder. "Tell me how you want me," He plunged two fingers inside of you.
Scaramouche knew you wanted him, but he needed to hear it. Someone actually wanted him. And someone like you. Someone who he thought was way too good for Teyvat itself, the Fatui, and certainly way too fucking for the likes of him. He needed to devoir and swallow you whole. The world was a big, scary place full of things that would take you away from him.
But here the likes of him was, reducing you to a soaking mess while he pumped his fingers in and out of your cunt. Your walls squeezed around his fingers as they curled relentlessly into your sweet spot.
"Please, please. I want you, Scaramouche! I need you!" Your hands gripped his sheets tightly, your hips bucking in to his fingers. His other hand stroked and caressed your thigh, pleasure curling stronger in your core as he stretched your walls apart. You reached a shaky hand out to him.
"Good girl," Scaramouche purred, intertwining his fingers with yours. He hooked the fingers pumping in and out of your cunt into your sweet spot one more time before he pulled them out of you. He relished in the way your eyes lit up hearing his praise.
He gently tugged you up to your knees as he laid down on the bed. His hands found your hips as you crawled to straddle him. "You want to be on top, huh?" He chuckled, grinding up against you, teasing the head of his cock at your entrance. That was fine. He could still more than dominate you this way.
His hands squeezed your hips hearing the string of moan that tore for your pretty mouth as he lowered you down onto his cock. He bottomed out, groaning huskily as his cock pulsed between your tight, velvety walls. "Do you feel what you do to me?" His body shook as he started bouncing you on his cock.
He was fast getting lost in the feeling of your walls stretching and squeezing wet around his cock. He almost couldn't take it. "The way you are moaning. What a slut," He said huskily, thrusting up into you with more urgency as he guide your pace.
You could barely control the shameless noises sounding from you. You trembled in his hands as you rode him, clinging to him in a way that he needed. Your moans, your whimpers, the way your body responded to him and his cock sent him further reeling.
"Cum on my cock. Be the first," Scaramouche moaned, capturing your lips in a possessive kiss. He swallowed your sweet moans, curling your tongue into submission. "The only one," His teeth nipped at your lips as he pulled away.
A near scream of pleasure met with his ears as you creamed on his cock. He rubbed your clit, nursing you through your orgasm. He'd been holding himself back from cumming so he could feel you cum first. You deserved that and more for letting him be so greedy with you.
Scaramouche held your chin, his eyes eyes hazy with lust as he made you look at him. "I'm cumming inside, okay?" He purred. He would always remember the way you looked at him as you nodded, like he was the center of your whole world.
"Mhm," You turned your cheek into his hand as he caressed it. Scaramouche is the center of your world. He could feel you were throwing every ounce of passion you felt for him into the way you rode him, eager to feel him cum inside you.
"You are mine," Scaramouche couldn't help but growl, gripping your hips tighter as he thrust more roughly inside of you. "All mine," Your feeble whimpers of pleasure as you said yes, you are his made his cock pulse cum inside of you.
This wouldn't be the last time either.
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Lessons in Love.
Bucky didn't believe in love at first sight. Then he met you.
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Pairing - Bucky Barnes x female reader
Warnings - None
Word Count - 3615
Author's Note - hello gorgeous people, hope you're all doing well. writing this has made my heart so full, and I hope it makes you feel the same. requests are always open and more than encouraged!! currently working on a stunning jake seresin request that's just so lovely. i'm SO open to more jake requests, but also any marvel, top gun maverick, criminal minds, narcos and any others you have in mind!! just send them over, and I'll see what I can do. as always, so much love x
Masterlist. Requests.
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“No way. How is that even possible?”
You look at the bewildered man in front of you and can’t help but smile.
“It’ll play anything you want it to. Anything in the world. Just ask it!” you encourage, beaming grin still plastered on your face.
“Alexa,” he says tentatively, “play Marvin Gaye.”
The first notes of Trouble Man begin to sound through your apartment, and his eyes light up. He’s looking at you like you’ve discovered something completely revolutionary.
You laugh – a real, genuine, delighted sound that flows through Bucky like a beam of light, illuminates his bones, makes his heart beat that little bit faster.
Grabbing your notebook, you delicately place a check next to Number 26 – voice-controlled devices. Number 27 is air fryers. Number 28 is Bluetooth. Number 29 is kindles and e-readers. Number 30 is Doordash. You’ve already checked off Spotify, and ATMs, and Google, and online banking, amongst many others. A list of things to better integrate Bucky into the 21st Century. A list of things to make him feel less like a man out of time. A list of things that allow you to spend all the time with him that you can.
A warm hand on your left hip and a cold one on your right pull you back into reality.
“Dance with me.” he murmurs. “Let me teach you something, for once.”
Before you can process his words, he’s gliding across the kitchen with you in his arms. Trouble Man isn’t playing anymore, instead replaced with something slower, richer. Bucky hasn’t taken his eyes off you, not even for a second. He’s watching your every move, every expression, every twitch of your lips. Reading you like a book.
You bring your hands to rest around his neck, and he relaxes into you. He’s leading, swaying you gently, occasionally twirling you like a ballerina in a music box. Perfectly effortless. He’s good at this.
The sun is setting, casting a warm orange hue across the kitchen. The light is reflecting onto your hair, making you glow, giving you a halo. Angelic, he thinks. My guardian angel.
You close the space between your bodies, wrapping your arms around his middle. Resting your head on his chest, he prays you can’t hear how his heart is working overtime. You shut your eyes, and breathe him in. He smells faintly like the Bakery, like sugar and coffee and cinnamon. The place that started it all.
             ⋆    .  ✵  ⋆    .  ✵   ⋆    .  ✵   ⋆    .  ✵ 
When Bucky first moved into his apartment, he’d noticed the Bakery down the street immediately. The smell of cake and coffee drifted out of the lilac colored door, enticing him in. He resisted the urge, and told himself that he’d go inside tomorrow.
The next day, he stood outside of the red brick building, and read the menu on the noticeboard carefully. Then he reread it. And then read it again. Since when was coffee so complicated? And don’t even get him started on cake. He swore there was only a few types back in the forties. Now, there was at least fifty different kinds on this menu alone. He was overwhelmed. He thought he’d be able to walk into this Bakery, get some coffee, maybe something sweet, and leave content. Instead, he's stood on the sidewalk on the verge of a panic attack. Tomorrow, he thinks to himself. I’ll go in tomorrow.
Tomorrow never comes. Every day, he takes a walk, and purposely passes the building that he longs to go into. But somehow, he can never find the courage. He knows he’ll just look like an idiot if he walks in. He’ll look lost, and out of place, and everyone will laugh and mutter. Look, they’ll jeer, The Winter Soldier can’t even order a coffee.
And so, he spares himself the pain. Lets his feet carry him past, only slowing down slightly when he passes the lilac door. Every day for three months, he takes the same route. Willing himself to go in, to find the courage. It’s just coffee, he tells himself. Get a grip.
Until, one day, you decided to change his life, unknowingly. Or maybe knowingly. He’s still not sure.
He takes his usual path, and just as he gets to the lilac door – you’re there. Stood, waiting, soft smile on your face. Bucky panics, and wills his feet to move faster, to take him away from this inevitably awkward situation. You stop him before he can make a run for it.
“Hi.”
Oh. You’re talking to him. You’re staring into his soul with no judgment, or fear, or trepidation. You’re staring into his soul with gentleness. Kindness. Friendship. He’s terrified.
“Uh – hi.” He rubs the back of his neck. Nervous habit.
“So, uh, I hope this isn’t weird, or anything. But, I’ve been watching you walk past every day for like three months, and, well…” you trail off. Now you look nervous. “Actually, I haven’t really thought this far ahead. I just see you, and I wanted to… invite you in, I guess? Not that you need an invite, of course not, we’re open to everyone, but… you always look like you’re going to come in, and then you never do. And I’ve been telling myself for months that I should properly invite you in, but now I’m realising this is, uh, really weird. And I’m sorry.”
You still have that gentle smile on your face, but it’s more tentative now. A dusting of pink is making its way onto your cheeks, and Bucky thinks it might be his new favourite color.
It’s now that he really starts to take you in. Your hair is blowing slightly in the breeze, and the sleeves of your sweater are pulled down over your wrists, to try and keep the New York chill at bay. You have bright, inquisitive eyes – eyes that contain hope, love, laughter. You make him feel almost peaceful. No one makes him feel like that. Damn.
You’ve stepped closer to him now, to get out of the way of the customers making their way through the door. You smell like sugar, and coffee, and optimism. He wants to breathe you in, let you settle in his lungs. A comfortable warmth spreads through his chest.
He decides to take a gamble and bear his truth to you. He’s not sure why, but he trusts you. He doesn’t trust anyone, these days. But he trusts you.
“Can I be honest with you?”, he asks, looking at you expectantly. You’re almost expecting him to laugh in your face at the absurdity of it all. You nod anyway, signalling for him to continue.
“I’ve been trying to work up the courage to come in. But every time I try, I just, uh-” he stutters, and you can tell that his mind is screaming at him, sounding alarm bells, begging him to stop with all this sudden vulnerability.
“It’s overwhelming, right?” you ask, cutting him off. Saving him. Guardian angel.
You see the relief in his body at your question. His fists unclench, the tension leaves his shoulders. He smiles bashfully. Half grateful, half embarrassed. You get it.
“Yeah,” he chuckles. You giggle, and he’s convinced that the melodious sound will circle around in his mind forever, like the Earth orbiting the Sun.
You fiddle with the strings of your mint green apron, and look at him. You’re gazing at him so earnestly that he’s worried he might spontaneously combust.
“Are you busy tonight?” you ask suddenly, and he feels so dizzy he’s concerned momentarily that he’s going to pass out.
“Uh, no. I’m not,” he replies, managing to force the words out of his mouth.
“We close at 6, so meet me here at 7.”
You still have that sparkle in your eye. He couldn’t say no to you if he tried.
“Why?” he queries. He’d be lying if he said he wasn’t absolutely petrified at the turn the conversation has taken.
“I want to show you around. Maybe make you a coffee, introduce you to some of my favourite things. You won’t believe how good my raspberry and white chocolate cookies are. They’re best sellers for a reason,” you beam at him.
Beaming. He wonders how he’s lived his whole life without your light illuminating his universe. Anywhere he goes without you is going to feel so dark, he thinks. How did I ever live like this?
He manages to pull himself together to smile back at you. His first genuine grin in God knows how long. He’s forgotten what joy feels like, and he’s almost drunk on it now.
He agrees to your plan, and you turn on your heel, about to make your way back inside.
“Wait!” he yells, louder than intended. “What’s your name?”
Your lips turn up into a smirk, mischief seeping out of your pores.
“Come back at 7 and find out.” You wink at him, and he has to take a few deep breaths in order to stay conscious. With that, you leave him alone on the sidewalk, where he’s silently thanking the universe for dropping you in his lap. Finally, he thinks. The cosmic punishment is over.
He does come back at 7. In fact, he’s stood outside waiting at 6:45. He can see you mopping the floor, singing as you go. His supersoldier hearing allows him to listen to your voice, even from this far away. He’s never been more grateful for the thing he used to call a curse. He’d be cursed every damn day if it meant he got to listen to you like this.
At 6:58, you appear at the lilac door, beckoning him to follow you inside. He knows that stepping over that threshold is going to change him fundamentally. He can’t wait.
Upon entering, he’s hit with the smell of cinnamon, sugar, coffee, and you. A beautiful mix of all three. Without a second thought, he reaches out with his right hand, and gently brushes some flour from your cheekbone.
“Bucky,” he murmurs.
You can’t tear your eyes away from him. Lips slightly parted, chest heaving, it takes you a minute to register that he spoke.
“What?” you ask, dazed by the handsome stranger with the steel blue eyes.
“My name,” he speaks softly. “It’s Bucky.”
You smile knowingly, and take a deep breath. It’s overwhelming, meeting someone that you know is going to be in your life forever. You’re both feeling the same, neither of you sure just quite what to do.
You grab his left hand, sighing quietly in relief at the feeling the cool metal against your heated skin. Leading him gently, he lets you guide him through the front of the store, until you stop behind the counter. He’s convinced he’d let you lead him anywhere, as long as he gets to feel your skin, soft and warm, on his. Grounding. Comforting. Easy.
“What kind of milk do you like?” you ask, fingers still intertwined with his.
“There’s more than one kind of milk?”
Bucky looks so disorientated, that you want to kiss the confused expression off his face. You chuckle softly, and the sound bounces off the metal in the room, twinkling around him.
“We have cows’ milk, oat milk, almond milk and soy milk.” You take one look at him, and decide to change course. “Let’s start with something less complex, actually. Any allergies I should know about?”
He shakes his head, mischievous grin beginning to form on his handsome face. There he is, you think. He’s with me.
“I’m going to make you a latte. It’s milky, and not too strong or too sweet. I think you’ll like it.”
She thinks I’ll like it, he muses. And he trusts you - whether it be with his life, or just a cup of coffee.
You reluctantly let go of his hand, and begin to flit around, gathering everything you need. Bucky leans back against the counter and watches carefully. He watches the way you bite your lip when you measure out the milk. He watches the way the steam from the coffee machine blows your hair back from your face gently. He watches the way you’re trying to make everything perfect. He can’t remember the last time someone paid attention to him like this. His mind is telling him to sprint in the opposite direction, to excuse himself and never come back. He’s terrified. But he stays. I deserve this, he thinks. I deserve something good.
You pull him from his thoughts by handing him the mug of warm coffee. He takes it from you carefully, and, without breaking eye contact, takes a sip. He smiles, really smiles. That’s all the validation you needed.
“Let me show you where we bake everything,” you say quietly, as if you’re afraid to burst this bubble of warmth and trust you’ve created. You’re scared he’s going to bolt if you give him the chance. So, you don’t. You take his hand once more, and guide him through to the kitchen.
“Have you done much baking in your life, Bucky?”
No, he thinks. But I will. I’ll bake everyday for the rest of my life if it means you’ll love me. If you’ll make me coffee and smile at me like that.
Instead, he answers cautiously.
“Not really. I’d like to, though.” He adds that last part bashfully. You smile back at him earnestly.
“Well then you’re in the right place,” you wink. He has the overwhelming urge to drop to his knees. To pray at your altar. To worship you like an angel sent down just for him. He’s surprised he’s still stood on two feet.
Before he can even register what’s happening, you’re beginning to create a mixture for your infamous cookies. You direct him to stir, while you add meticulously measured ingredients into the bowl.
“Put those arms to good use,” you’d smirked, and a blush had risen up to his cheeks almost instantly.
You click the radio on, and a soft, jazzy melody begins to drift through the room. You’re humming quietly, gliding around the kitchen, and he decides that this is it for him. You’re it for him. He could watch you do this every day and die a happy man.
Cookies baking in the oven, you jump up to sit on one of the counters. Bucky moves to stand in between your legs, still being careful to keep his distance ever so slightly. He knows if he touches you, he won’t ever want to let go.
“This wasn’t as scary as I thought it was going to be,” he confesses.
“What, me?” you tease.
“No. Coffee. And cookies,” he chuckles.
“Are there lots of things that you haven’t done because you find them scary?” you ask genuinely. You want to know him. All of him. Fears, wants, quirks. All of it.
“Yeah, actually. The world is so different now. I don’t really know where to start. It’s all terrifying, honestly,” he laughs. You laugh with him, but you know there’s truth to his words. You want to wrap your arms around him. He may be 6 foot tall and made of solid muscle and vibranium, but you want to protect him.
“Why don’t we do it together?”
A pause. He’s confused again.
“Do what together?”
“All of it. The learning. I’ll help you. Everything is less scary if you do it with someone else.”
It’s now that he’s convinced he’s dreaming. You can’t be real. Why would you be here, offering him everything, after all that he’s done? He has to remind himself. I deserve this. I deserve something good.
You can sense his trepidation, so you keep talking.
“Why don’t we make a list? You write down the things you want to learn about. I’ll write down other things I think you should know. You’ll be an expert on the 21st Century before long, Buck.”
Buck. The nickname sounds like a gift coming from your lips.
“Okay. Yeah. Are you sure you don’t mind?”
The anxiety is coming off him in waves. He’s panicking. You grab a hold of both of his hands, and place one on each of your legs, just above your knees. He steps in closer, and takes a breath. You’re warm, and you’re soft, and you’re love personified. He’s okay.
“Of course I don’t mind. I’m excited!” you assure him. Then, quieter, “It means I get to spend more time with you.”
He aims a beaming, megawatt smile in your direction. He feels as if his nerve endings are alight. You’ve awoken something in him. He’d forgotten what it was like to feel like this. To feel alive.
You reach over and grab your notebook. In it, you simply write his name, followed by a love heart. Then, underneath, you begin to list everything you can think of that you want to teach him. You hand the list to him, and he adds his own requests. Between you, you manage to write 50 different lessons.
“Perfect. We’ll start with number one, and work our way down. Are you busy tomorrow evening?”
He chuckles at your eagerness, but secretly, he can’t wait. He knows he’ll be counting down the hours until he can see you again.
“Nope, I’m not. You are my only priority, sweetheart.”
The term of endearment seeps into your skin, settles in your ribcage. You’re convinced it’ll warm you up from the inside out. If he keeps calling you sweetheart in that Brooklyn drawl of his, you’ll never be cold again.
             ⋆    .  ✵  ⋆    .  ✵   ⋆    .  ✵   ⋆    .  ✵ 
You’re not sure if you’ve been swaying in your kitchen with Bucky to Marvin Gaye for 2 minutes or 2 hours. You’re comfortably settled into him, as if the space in his arms was made especially for you. Maybe it was.
Bucky’s voice breaks through the solitude.
“You know, I’ve created my own list,” he murmurs against the top of your hair, where he’s resting his head.
You pull back, still in his arms, to look at him carefully.
“Oh yeah?”
“Yeah. Read it, and tell me what you think.”
He untangles himself from you and crosses the room, to retrieve his leather-bound notebook. He returns, and places it carefully in your awaiting hands.
You flick open the cover to reveal the first page. You recognise his handwriting instantly. It’s spiralling, and imperfect, but so Bucky. At the top of the page, you spot the title – your name, with a love heart next to it. Exactly the same as you’d done for him when you’d originally created your list together.
Underneath your name, only one thing is written.
I love you.
You look up at him, to see him watching you, holding his breath. Neither of you know what to say. You know what you want to say. You want to tell him that you hope the list never ends, so you always have an excuse to spend time with him. You want to tell him that you watched him walk past the door of the Bakery every day for 3 months because you thought he was the most beautiful person you’d ever seen. You want to tell him that every time he looks at you, you feel as if you’re going to pass out. You want to tell him that you can recognise him anywhere, by touch or smell alone. Instead, you say,
“You do?”
That genuine, million dollar smile is back, etched on his face. He’s glowing, light radiating from his bones.
“Yes. I do. I think I’ve loved you ever since I saw you waiting for me on the doorstep of the Bakery that day.”
You think you might be floating. Levitating above ground, fuelled by love. You laugh.
“That’s the exact moment I fell in love with you.”
He laughs with you, then. You could get drunk off the sound.
“I didn’t think love at first sight was a real thing. I thought I was going crazy,” he confesses.
He’s convinced that the two of you have discovered something, invented it even. Because he doesn’t understand. If love feels like this, so all encompassing, so consuming – how does anyone live? Every moment of every day, Bucky thinks of you. How does anyone go to work? How does anyone ever feel sad, or angry, when love like this exists?
You drop the notebook and cross the room to him. He closes the gap, and throws his arms around you, spinning you in circles, laughing with joy. He sets you back on your feet, and tilts your chin up, so you’re looking into his steel blue eyes. You could drown in the ocean of his irises if he let you.
He leans down, and presses his lips to yours. He’s giving you all of the love, the joy, the laughter – everything good that he has ever felt, because of you – through his kiss. Your knees go weak, and he holds you up by your waist, his strong arms encircling your frame. He tastes like coffee, and sugar, and promises. You’ll never want to taste anything else.
Eventually, you break away for air. You gaze up at him, and he sees sunshine in your eyes. He’s not sure what he did to earn a love like this. You seem to sense his doubts creeping in, because you say, in the most assured voice he’s ever heard –
“No one has ever loved anyone as much as I love you.”
I deserve this, he thinks. I deserve something good.
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angelltheninth · 8 months
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Ok so hear me out. Teacher Gojo sees you (student) shopping for lingerie and then pick up some lacy black underwear and tell you that you would look good in it, then the next day you wear the lingerie, and after class he asks you to stay behind and you 🙏🙏🙏two fuck over his desk. 🙏
Again, if he was my teacher I wouldn't miss a class, he's too cool to miss
Pairing: Gojo Satoru x Fem!Reader
Tags: nsfw, smut, classroom sex, teacher-student relationship, forbidden relationship, secret relationship, age-gap, desk sex, lingerie, pictures
A/N: Teacher Zhongli, now teacher Gojo.
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Teacher!Gojo who doesn't think much of it when he sees you going into a lingerie store, he's shopped there for his exes, they have the sexiest thing in there. But he's curious, what do you like to wear? It's a curiosity he shouldn't about one of his students, yet it's there.
Teacher!Gojo who greets you when he sees what you've picked out. Very sexy, he didn't know you had it in you to wear something so revealing, and all that lace too, very lewd for a star student. You get some of the best grades in his class, so maybe he never thought you'd have time for sex all that much.
Teacher!Gojo who tells you how he thinks you'd look pretty in what you picked out. Anything in this store would probably look good on you. You have a good eye for pretty, sexy things, just like he does. Which is why you're always looking at each other isn't it? He noticed it. No shame in it, he's happy to be object of your fantasy. Or reality.
Teacher!Gojo who strokes his cock at the picture you sent of you wearing the lingerie you bought. He shouldn't, you're his student, but he's not that far from you in age is he? And it's not like he's being pushy or trying to make you fall in love by playing mind games. He's an honest guy, and he is honestly fallen deep in lust with you.
Teacher!Gojo who can't focus on teaching when he notices that you've come to class wearing that lingerie. What are trying to do? If he gets a boner in front of all of his students how would he explain it? He hurries through the lecture, trying to avoid looking at you as much as he can so he can keep himself focused.
Teacher!Gojo who stops you right before you walk out and tells you to lock the doors behind you. You won't have that smirk on your face for long. Do you know what a mess his underwater is in? Do you know how much cum went to waste when it should have been in one of your holes? Such a shame. Will you make up for it? No way did you wear that and you didn't want him to fuck you. Let him see it in person today.
Teacher!Gojo who marvels at how fucking sexy you look. Something so pretty should stay on you while he fucks you. He'll just move the fabric to the side and push his cock in. How are you so wet already? Oh hold on, all those trips to the bathroom and you spent them fingering yourself? How naughty. How worthy of a rough punishment.
Teacher!Gojo who lets you take off his blindfold so you can look at him properly while he fucks you on your desk. Not his, yours, because you'll be sitting here every day knowing that this is where your pussy got railed by your teacher. It's gonna drive you insane with lust the more he does it until just sitting down for class will make you a sopping wet mess.
Teacher!Gojo who is gentle with his kisses and his hands, mapping out your body, complimenting how well the bra suits you, how he can see your nipples through the material. His best student, and you have such a slutty body. Seems like you know a lot more then just studying for exams. Your cunt seems like it knows how to make a cock feel good, but has a cock ever made you feel good? Made you moan so loud you have to cover your mouth? No? What a damn shame. He'll do it then.
Teacher!Gojo who rubs the messy head of his cock over your clit which was just begging for attention after he fucked your cunt. He didn't forget and he's not a selfish lover, he'll make you come just as hard as he did. Perhaps next time you can go shopping together, and maybe you can come over to his place and give him a little show. He'll even grade you on your performance.
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silvery-orchid · 9 months
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BE A BETTER PET FOR ME.
synopsis: neuvillette found a perfect use for you after you left your homeland. (honestly this is so depraved and filthy and messed up i will just give you the warnings so you can decide if you wish to read it. neuvillete the man that you are!!)
pairing: dom!yan! neuvillette x fem!sub!reader; (mentions of dom!yan!dottore x reader) warnings: blowjobs, dubcon (barely), humping, dom/sub dynamics, breeding, pet play, hard kinks, masochist reader, facials, handjobs; mentions of: gang bangs, blackmail, hypnosis, bdsm, bondage, has plot kind of, probably more i can't think of right now.
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You've always had to answer to someone in your life. Someone higher than you because they gaze down on everyone and you should be grateful they spared you a glance and asked you anything. If they relied on you get something done - at the orphanage you grew up in or the elections you ran - you should have counted yourself lucky they needed you at all. Leaving Snezhnaya wasn't easy by any means but luck and bravery happened to be on your side that night. No, maybe it was an idea of grandeur on your part?
Regardless of the reason, in your life you learned not to ask too many questions and Fontaine was not hard for you to get used to. Being part of this justice system reminded you of something familiar but far more noble than sending children to their punishments. And, while it did resemble a show, you weren't surprised by that - the only thing that surprised you was your boss.
Neuvillette, the archetypal leader with enough calm and manipulative wit to stand elevated above everyone. People marvelled at him, some were jealous that you were the one to carry his paperwork back and forth and you only have Neuvillette to thank for being so ruthless and cold they never suspected anything else.
In public settings, he didn't allow you to even stand near him. During work hours, you were treated just like anyone else. But after everyone left; Neuvillette never let you run away.
At first, given his nature, you thought you were being too paranoid. You thought his intense gaze that made you drop your pens was just his way of saying you were not good enough. His tugs at your clothes were only reminders of how sloppy you were, surely. He only did that to make you more presentable because he couldn't stand the sight of you. That must have been it.
However, you quickly realized that he was simply a man who wanted to control everything. People had specific roles to fulfil in his eyes and you should have been even more paranoid about your own.
Doubts went away on the night his gloved hand slid up your skirt during a banquet he didn't deem important enough. He saw you standing in the hallway and told you to follow him. He was so calm and composed even when locking the door behind him and pressing you against it. He didn't flinch while you were confused, his fingers were already sliding up your thigh.
'Your dress tonight is far too tempting. Simply groping you to fix it won't be enough.' were the last words he said before sliding your panties to the side and covering your mouth with his hand.
Neuvillette did not have enough regard for you that would disobey his wishes and, while you just remember being hazy, you don't remember fighting his advances.
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And that is how it all began. Soon enough, your main job of sorting documents became secondary even if you still had to carry it out with perfection.
Your main job and joy transformed into being perfect enough for him to breed and break. You were lucky nobody was allowed to enter into his office without a direct invitation. If anyone did, they might have found you pressed against the walls or chained to his desk. Perhaps, they would have found you on a pile of important paperwork you brought with his cock buried deep inside while he manhandles you.
But he was so good at it. Sometimes you would stand on the sidelines during his speeches or trials and you would feel warm just from looking at him on that podium. He was always, always above you and a twisted need find it's way between your legs. You would never admit to anyone but him to where you disappeared to. You would never even tell him how, if he was on the radio, you would masturbate to his voice alone.
And fuck, did he have such a nice voice. Anytime it gave you a command, your spine would feel it. If he gave you praise and called you a 'perfect dumb toy', your body would get flushed. If he degraded you? You just felt the need to hear his insults over and over again. Neuvillette was a selfish man, but he loved to see and hear you break.
Right now, you were sitting down next to his chair. He was signing off the final papers you brought with one hand while his other absentmindedly played with your hair.
He would soon be finished. Your eyes carefully traced his movements in anticipation. Soon he would be done and you wouldn't have to keep rubbing your thighs together. Sometimes you would glance at this lap and see that he was already half hard. His libido was insatiable. And it felt so nice to know you were the only one he would breed and stain with his cum.
When he put the last stamp, you looked up at him. He didn't issue you a command and you didn't dare to do anything on your own.
'What? Are you looking at me and hoping for something?'
His voice was always cold unless he was moaning and panting against yohr body. Perhaps that is why you enjoyed everything he did if it made you feel wanted by a man like him?
'Are you so eager to moan out you love me while you cream all over my cock again?'
He hadn't even done anything and you were starting to get wet. Who would imagine such a proper man respected by all would ever say such a thing? Nobody. And that was the allure. Only you knew how much his depravity ran.
'Pet, move over in front of me.' A command. Finally. He could see your eyes light up as you dragged yourself over the floor to kneel down. Your thighs rubbed together and Neuvillette realized just how much he had spoilt you when your hand reached for his belt.
He glared at you and that was enough sign that you had done something wrong. To make it look like an accident, you placed it on his knee instead and rubbed small circles just so that he could feel the warmth of your skin.
Maybe he would punish you by tying you up again? Or he would deny your orgasms and cum on your stomach to prove you weren't good enough for him to actually fuck?
'Tell me pet, am I the best man you've ever been with?'
That was odd. Neuvillette never asked you questions of this nature. Usually they were only questions during passion like: 'You love being dragged on the floor don't you?' and 'Wouldn't you just look so good pregnant and stuffed with my seed?'. But this was new.
'The best man I've been with?' Maybe this was a new game of making you embarrassed? It certainly did the trick
'Y-Yes.' 'Prove it to me then. Before I replace you.'
Even from the darkness inside his office and your current position now you could see that light smirk he had while resting his head on his hand. He wanted to be especially cruel tonight but you never thought he would replace you so soon.
With a shaky hand and a racing mind you reached out for his belt. He allowed it this time but he wasn't amused. If he wanted to replace you, you'd just have to make him feel better than ever before.
Your thighs were so hot and warm you couldn't control yourself. You wanted nothing more than to put his cock in your mouth. No time to undress him or tug down your own clothes.
Neuvellitte let you just free his cock from the restraints and it was already hard by that look on your face. Warm skin, glassy eyes that didn't look anywhere else and complete obedience were in front of him. How could he not enjoy the face you didn't even realize your mouth was open before you pressed yourself forward to lick his tip.
He was such a pale man and yet his tip was the most beautiful shade of red to you. Your fingers wrapped around his girthy and veiny cock and your hips jerked slightly. You remembered how nice it felt when it was inside you - stretching you and hitting all the spots. You had to thank his generosity by circling the tip of it with your tongue. Your excitement was so immense that your mouth was filling with spit and since it was so late Neuvillette didn't care if it got all over his cock and dripped down to his pants.
You were so eager and adorable, looking blissful before he even did anything to you. He thought it would make him happy but instead he furrowed his brow.
'Not good enough.'
You barely had time to register what he said before he gripped your jaw and pulled your head up. The sudden shift had you groaning because you were still on your knees.
'You say i am the best man you've been with yet that look on your face didn't change.'
What was he talking about?
'It looks the same on the photos where you're sucking off that doctor. Tell me, did you take me for a fool?'
All the warmth in your body suddenly disappears. You feel cold, colder than ever. Maybe even cold like your homeland and the messed up laboratory Dottore forced you in. Neuvillette knew. He knew about your past and the fact you were a fugitive. Would he turn you in? Wait, was this his messed up trial to prove you didn't deserve this comfortable life?
You were shivering by this point and refusing to cry but you simply couldn't stop your eyes from getting teary when Neuvillette tossed an envelope and all the photos flew out.
It reminded you what you ran way from and what formed all these kinks Neuvillette triggered again.
There was a photo of you in a cow bikini drinking milk from a bowl on the floor with bruised hands. Then, there was one of you being tied to his table. Another one of you with a special device that hypnotised you. One where you were covered in cum all over your body. And the last one was the one Neuvillette spoke of; it was from when Dottore made you fuck him and some of his clothes. A perfect shot of you giving one of them a blowjob that he took.
But you ran away! You did everything you could! Was this a warning? How did Neuvillette get this envelope?
'I never thought you would dare lie in front of me. You should know better than that.'
His voice was cold but never like this. Never did you feel hatred from it but not it was different. Neuvillette hated you and you lost everything you had. Your hair was standing up, your hands were shaking and you could feel your heartbeat pounding away in your ears. Neuvillette was getting blurry and you were growing more desperate.
Then, when he saw you like that, completely afraid and dependent on him, Neuvillette's twisted desires grew. No where on those photos did you look so lost and desperate. He was probably the first man to make you feel that way and he couldn't deny how your brokenness made his cock throb. Then, he decided to be your saviour instead. Preventing crime and punishing it went hand and hand. He would throw you a bone to cling to, and would get a pet even more eager to please.
How desperately he wanted to see your ruin. To hear it and taste it on his tongue.
'Prove to me how desperate you are and I might take pity on you.'
Save you from himself? You aren't sure if it was the glimmer of hope or the messiness in your head at all those years in Dottore's hands that made you act but your blood started to flow and bloom again.
All you had to do was prove just how good and desperate you are. Nobody was better at that than you and nobody got more wet at the idea of it.
You placed your knees on the sides of Neuvillette's left leg. Those glassy eyes of yours and tear strained cheeks were a sight to behold when he saw you were looking up at him in marvel. Then, you rested your head on his knee and reached to jerk him off with your right hand. Your head was hazy and tired, but your hips were moving on their own. You were grinding down on his boot; you were fucking yourself crazy on it.
That night, you kept humping his foot until you reached the most intense and messy orgasm. You were so fucked out and desperate you probably didn't even know you were drooling and slobbering all over his pants while moaning how you were a good pet; how badly you wanted him to fuck you. Fuck, you didn't even realize your hand had stopped moving before he reached his high because you tired yourself out and fell asleep.
But Neuvillete didn't mind; he simply let you stay on his lap looking so serene before he gave his cock a few final strokes to paint your face white.
Maybe he should thank that man for sending him this envelope. Maybe even for training you to be such a perfect pet. But one thing was for sure, he definitely wouldn't let you go anytime soon.
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avert you eyes. i was hormonal
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I'm relistening to The Magnus Archives, and I made a list of Actual Canonical Details we as a fandom forget about
- sasha gets coffee from a specific coffee shop every morning
- Jon has an excellent sense of direction
- canonically in artifact storage there is: a wardrobe light cannot penetrate, a carved rock eye that interferes with the video cameras and therefore is kept in a black velvet bag, and a scalpel ride with disease no matter what they use to sterilize it, kept in a hermetically sealed plastic box
- during halloween week, they have to call in the archives as backup due to the influx of statements. jon canonically gets a good nights sleep after disproving these statements.
- Jon sincerely believes he is far too unlucky for statements to just be a hallucination
- Not-sasha asked not to be recorded multiple times
- when told he benifited from gertrude's death, jons only response was "...I didn't?"
- [daisy became police in ~2002, almost 15 years before the story starts...meaning she is canonically late thirties/early 40s
- even when compared with the paranormal, daisy considers car accidents worse
- mary keay made an eye pun "i know the institute and i haven't always seen eye to eye, as it were"
- jon noticed when ghost hunt uk stopped updating
- sasha is taller than not-sasha
- annabelle dresses like a vintage clothing store exploded on her, has bleach blonde hair and dark skin
- annabelle looked "like the type of person that talked to cleaners as if they were actual people"
- annabelle looms over the cleaner by almost a full foot, meaning she Tall
- "the moment i die will feel just the same as this one" is not just a georgie thing, it's an End thing in general, as proved in ep 70
- not-sasha tends to stay late
- martin worked at the institute in 2009
- micheal has curly sandy blonde hair
-micheal is tall
- melanie and jon are on the same wavelength, and when working together they both came to the same conclusions with the same evidence
- elias does not think daisy is smart
- georgie is observant, and pays attention to peoples behavior
- melanie thought jon killing someone with a pipe was "wildly out of character" for him
- georgie and jon have a mutual friend named Jess who thinks Hungarian food is "too Soviet"
- jon borrowed georgie's coat when he went to meet jude perry
- jon tells jude to kill him as an ultimatum every five minutes
- elias tells tim that when presented with horrors, he finds comfort in beaurocrocy
- jared hopworth is handsome with cheekbones and a jawline to die for
- georgie was canonically willing to cover for jon to the police with no context after an unpleasant breakup and after no contact for almost 5 years
- georgie grew up poor in liverpool, and had a scouse accent until she went to oxford
- basira is a huge nerd and will talk about what she's reading to anyone who will listen
- nikola makes an allusion to not having a face
- martin and melanie got along fantastically
- georgie told jon that he needs anchors
- "if something happened to you, or-or god forbid, The Admiral, I-"
- "Don't be a Stranger." georgie thinks she's funny
- michael had a childhood friend who was taken by something like michael (schizophrenic) and that's what drove him to the magnus institut-he never you over what he saw or didn't see
- Hannah is a black woman who works in the library, had a "Thing With The Milk In The Breakroom" in april 2016. Went on maternal leave to have a baby in June of 2017.
- elias enjoys scheduling
- martin zones out when he has to read a statement, and often takes little notice of his surroundings when doing so/about to do so
- martin was looking for a book called "marvelous spiritualism and the circus in tge 19th century" and a guy named tom said tim had it checked out
- danny and tim didn't talk much, but were still close
- Abigail Ellison-who tim calls abby- is a mutual friend of tim and danny's from "back home"
- tim shipped danny and abby
- out of the two of them, danny was more assertive and tim "had never been able to stand in the way of his confidence"
- tim has a big armchair, a printer, and a couch
- melanie has made everyone in the archives cry
- [basira loved wtg until it "took a weird turn in season 3" when they introduced something she thought was odd
- melanie, basira, and martin used to go out for drinks, and martin and basira were gossip buddies
- Melanie's dad had dementia relatively young, but he always remembered her. He called her "Little Moth", and her mothers life insurance helped pay for him to be put into Ivy Meadows Care Home-where he was killed by the Corruption at the hands of John Amherst before Julia and Trevor burnt it down.
- julia is in her early thirties and wears nondescript hard wearing denim
- jon thought that reading statements could be a classical addiction, but decided that even if it was he had no time to, as he put it, "experiment"
- Peter was surprised that elias killed people kimself-implying elias has people to do murders for him. what other murders did he commission
- martin and basira both noticed something wrong with melanie after the Elias Incidint when her work started to deteriorate-martin said she'd always been "quite conscientious"
- right after being told by basira that standing by with a cup of tea wasnt enough, when melanie entered the room Martin immediately offered her a cup of tea.
- Martin knocked over a stack of papers and defended himself by saying that they shouldn't have been there. the absolute madlad
- after micheal stabbed jon, jon told martin he stabbed himself with a bread knife; and martin then proceeded to A) believe him and B) not trust him with anything sharp after that
- Gerry didn't care abt what happened in the unknowing bc he's a book. jon asked if he was serious. Gerry responded that he was, in fact, dead serious.
- gerry teases jon by saying he doesn't know anything before rescinding that statement avd giving the vaguest hint possible. he's such a dickhead i love him
- gerard didn't trust gertrude-he wanted to, but she reminded him of his mother
- gerard called trevor and julia "the van helsings"
- gerry was jealous of lietner bc his mom paid so much attention to them
- mary haunted gerard for 5 years before gertrude destroyed her, and gerry cried with relief when gertrude gave him back the destroyed book
- before the unknowing, daisy was running around killing mannequins and other Strangers
- tim didn't think they would be able to stope the unknowing
- jon would rather have tim where he could see him-which is why he let tim come (guilt guilt guilt guilt GUILT GUILT GUIL GU
- basiras dad couldn't stand people who passively whined about their problems. he always said "If you don't like something, you accept it and you adapt, or you fight, and you change it. Whining doesn't help."
- Melanie was depressed before the unknowing
- jon rambles about his latest insights and melanie wants to punch him.
- martin: "it felt good, weaving my own little web." "Also, i get to burn some stuff, so that's cool"
- basira was the one to suggest that they not tell Melanie they were doing surgery
-Daisy made jon listen to the Archers. "I hate it. but it feels... good, to hate something that can't hurt me"
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two-white-butterflies · 9 months
Text
mastermind | d3
Description: Ms. L/N turns to Mrs. L/N. In which, you ponder where you've been - and where you are now.
Pairing: daniel ricciardo/singer!reader
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yournameupdates: There's a lot to unpack with Y/N's new album. The consensus is 7 of the songs written are about her ex-boyfriend: Tom Hiddleston, while Style (ft. Taylor Swift) is about Harry Styles? What could be the reason for the L/N-Hiddleston breakup?
likes by danielricciardo, balana291, and 92,129 others
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danielricciardo: More interested to hear about the record-breaking awards she's going to earn after this. - yournameupdates: She's definitely in for the records.
archianana29: I think it's because Hiddleston wants to seem like a bachelor?? Because of his new marvel film. - wannna82: she's not any better, she's profiting off his success. - - oceansdeap0: @wanna82 mind you, she came out of nowhere. - - - wannna82: @oceansdeap0 exacto! publicity stunt?
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yournamehiddleston: According to Y/N's newest single: All You Had To Do Was Stay. Tom Hiddleston was the first one who called things off - but after a few months of being alone, he wanted to get back with her. Hence her explaination. All he had to do was stay :(
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f1multistan: Daniel is everywhere these days - watchasay8: Who? - - f1multistan: the f1 racer
hesaysme129: 'YOU WERE ALL I WANTED' it's over I think.
yn1989era: I love how it's her first album and she already has 1000m fans 😭 - katyandyn: Teenage Dream and 1989 are no skip albums
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Daniel Ricciardo couldn't believe that he was invited to attend the Grammys. It wasn't like he did anything groundbreaking in the realm of the music industry - but thanks to his amazing management - he was finally there. Normally, he hated award shows because of the cameras that were shoved in his face.
But he couldn't find himself hating this award show.
His favorite singer, Y/N L/N, was going to be in the same table as him. He crossed his fingers - maybe even beside him?
"God, I'm so sorry for being late. There was a mile long traffic back there," you ran to embrace Beyonce, pressing a soft kiss to her cheek as you settled in your seat. Daniel began to realize that he was extremely lucky to be seating where he was.
"Daniel Ricciardo, right?" you smiled at him with those pensive E/C eyes - pulling him back into reality. "Yes, I'm a big fan." he shook your hand, feeling those soft palms press against his.
If this was a dream, he didn't want to wake up.
"Is it your first time in the Grammys?" you inquired, gently fiddling with the hems of your dress. "Yeah," he scratched the back of his head - oblivious to the cameras that were planted on the both of you. "It's nice to have someone to relate to," you chuckled as it was also your first time. "I heard that award shows could get pretty boring," you consulted in him.
Daniel felt so fucking special in that moment.
You were sitting beside Beyonce, but chose to speak to him. Fuck, does that mean that he was better than Beyonce? Nope, that's blasphemy - but still, it was flattering to think that you'd choose him.
"Tell me when you get bored, there's an ice-cream place just around the corner. We could grab a few bites." he offered - taking a leap of fate. "Sounds like a plan," you smiled and he could feel the crimson blush creep up his cheeks.
✧✧✧
This was something that he'd never forget. He couldn't wait to return to the paddocks and tell Sebastian that he had ice cream with THE Y/N L/N. "Is strawberry your favorite?" he asked, seeing you gobble down the large sized roll. "Yep, I put it in everything." you smiled.
It's been a month since you last tasted strawberry ice cream - you almost forgot how good it tasted. "I'm having a lot of fun, Dan." you complimented - seeing that the tip of his nose was coated with a chocolate syrup. "Darling, there's a little something -" you motioned.
He almost forgot how to move after hearing you call him that.
He flashed you his toothy grinned smile, before wiping the syrup off his nose. "So uhh, I'd like to get your number - so we can hang out another time." you asked, staring deep into his eyes.
Daniel realized that this was the chance of a lifetime. He almost reached for his phone to give you his number - but then he realized. He left his phone at home and he didn't memorize his number.
So instead of giving you his number - he came up with something that he'd regret until the day he died - or until the day he met you again. "No." he answered with confidence. "What?" your eyes narrowed, and he smiled again.
"I'll ask for your number the next time that I see you. To check if fate is really on our side." he explained and you could only smile back.
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yournameupdates: Y/N L/N and Richard Madden are confirmed to be dating! Congratulations, she's finally found her Prince Charming.
liked danielricciardo and 102,192 others
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theyn_ln: He's certainly a Prince Charming! LOL - yournameupdates: 🥺
hennalova9: THEY LOOK SO PERFECT TOGETHER I'M SO HAPPY THAT SHE MOVED ON 😭
heysistersoul23: THIS IS ENDGAME
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danielricciardo: You didn't hear it from me folks, but @theyn_ln is releasing a song tonight. 😉
liked by theyn_ln, maddenrichard and 1,291,192 others
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theyn_ln: Well, I rarely break promises.
maddenrichard: 🔥
formulalover91: DANIEL AND Y/N? THE BEST OF BOTH WORLDS
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theyn_ln: Message in a Bottle MV will be released MIDNIGHT EST. @danielricciardo I always believed in you.
liked by danielricciardo and 1,290,120 likes
comments
danielricciardo: meetup when?
maddenrichard: I'm very proud of you - theyn_ln: thank you mi amor ❤️
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yournameupdates: According to some insiders, Richard Madden proposed to Lilly James this March 4, 2017. But where does that leave Y/N? We demand an explaination. @maddenrichard
liked by 429,390
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theyn_ln: I honestly don't know what's happening right now. Please give me space luv ❤️ - yournameupdates: Yes ma'am
thisloveis1989: The way that she saw a future with him and he threw it away. 1 YEAR TOGETHER AND HE THREW IT AWAY?
thismyrealspace9: the album finna hit
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theyn_ln: You are not the exception. You will never learn your lesson.
💜 Foolish One and Better Man out MIDNIGHT EST.
liked by danielricciardo and 1,291,002 others
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danielricciardo: The songs will be beautiful, but I hope that you're OK. - theyn_ln: Getting there!
taylorynkatyuniverse: FOOLISH ONE HURTS! BETTER MAN HURTS EVEN MORE 😭
icedamericano4: I see the permanent damage you did to me. RICHARD MADDEN YOU ARE PUBLIC ENEMY #1.
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Daniel couldn't believe his fucking eyes. It was you.
"Y/N." his eyebrows softened, seeing the familiar posture. "Dan," you turned to look at him - inviting him with a warm embrace. "It's been 5 years since we've last seen each other," you buried your face in his shoulders, inhaling his scent of vanilla and chocolate.
"I thought I lost you for a second," he chuckled, completely forgetting about the drivers that were waiting for him back in the yacht. "Maybe this time you'll finally give me your number," you suggested and a nervous chuckle left his lips. "I'll be honest with you," he began.
"- I totally forgot my phone back at home the first time you asked me." he confessed, pulling his phone out of his pocket and offering it to you. "But I'm not letting you go this time." he smiled.
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(2021)
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theyn_ln: 7 years overdue, but here she is. My 2nd studio album 'folklore' will be out on September 23. Pre-order is available. You can also order @danielricciardo 's merch while you're at it hehe.
liked by carlossainz55, danielricciardo and 2,192,190 others
comments
danielricciardo: The album is 10000/10 - theyn_ln: glad to have ur opinion
carlossainz55: Are we invited to the listening party? - danielricciardo: Already happened buddy, the invitation must've gotten lost in the mail. 😭
maxverstappen1: 💜
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theyn_ln: Officially Mrs. L/N-Ricciardo. 💍
liked by danielricciardo and 3,129,102 likes
comments have been restricted.
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danielricciardo: Mr. L/N-Ricciardo is officially my job title.
liked by maxverstappen1 and 1,291,092 others
comments have been restricted.
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@lpab07 @ietss @shouq @fdl305 @iloveyou3000morgan
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rowan-post · 6 months
Text
RPC self-care
We all get worn down by life and often we turn to RP for rejuvenation. But more than once I've seen people on here that find themselves burnt out on the RP community itself. With nearly 20 years of role playing under my belt, I thought I'd share some of my favourite self-care tricks.
Block people. You don't have to explain yourself and 'weird vibes' is a legitimate reason. You deserve to feel safe and unbothered in your hobby space, and RP is based on consent. Just like with any recreational activity, you can withdraw your consent at any time and no is a complete sentence.
Turn off anon. This prevents anonymous harassment and gives you great insight into who to block or report if you get non-anonymous harassment.
Drop threads. I know RP etiquette suggests you need to tell your RP partner when and why, and sure, if they ask politely you can give it a go - just know that a pre-written variant of 'not feeling it' is good enough. In my humble opinion, I think dropping boring or vexing threads is everyone's prerogative and doesn't require explanation. Again, no is a complete sentence.
Talk it out. If you like the thread but things took a turn you didn't like, it's time to bring the RP into the workshop. Something like 'Hey I really like our RP so far but I'm losing my spark, can we talk about course correcting where the plot is going?'
Make clear rules and revise them frequently. I'd also advise against spending said rules excusing or explaining why you don't like or want a certain thing - I cannot stress enough how your preferences are not up for debate.
Get comfy chasing. A lot of RP is about inviting others to play over and over and over. Rejection is a part of it. See if you can't find some element of self-care in it - taking rejection well is a great skill to practice in such a low stake environment.
Notice and celebrate the good stuff, instead of digging holes about the bad. Tell your co-players how great they are. Marvel at all the hard work you put into your muses and graphics. Admire your own blog.
Stop. Take a break. Check in with yourself. Do you actually need to face something in IRL? Do you need to rest? A snickers? A walk? Don't bother with posts á la 'offline for the day' - leave your options open to reduce guilt or shame if you want to poke your head back in.
Happy writing. 🌿
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keqism · 10 days
Text
november
⊹ feat. wriothesley
⊹ premise. ' nothing worth fighting for was ever won without sacrifice ' — final fantasy┊for @seraphiism's 2024 writing event
⊹ cw. story quest spoilers, mentions of blood, wriothesley + reader have a daughter
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When Wriothesley was ten years old, he believed he was cursed. 
Cursed to a lifetime of misery spent huddled on the cold, bare floor of the orphanage he grew up with, the soft cries of the children around him depriving him of the quiet gift of sleep. He doesn't remember any of their faces anymore, but faint memories linger in his mind. 
There was a time when Mother and Father, as they insisted on being called, let him and another boy outside the orphanage. It had been a cold day, the water of Fontaine's fountains slightly freezing over. He had dipped his fingers through the water, marveling at the icy surface before the other boy called his name, pointing to a nearby shop.
The two of them had huddled together before the window of a bakery, little legs straining to support their weight as they stood on tiptoes to peer at the displayed goods. Wriothesley remembers there was a cake, decorated with red icing that matched his flushed cheeks and the threadbare scarf tucked around his shoulders.
Happy Birthday!, the cake read. He didn't have a birthday—Mother had never given him one—and it hadn't bothered him before. But at that moment, Wriothesley wished for that cake to be his, so desperately wished that he could swallow the entire thing and understand what it feels like to be cherished for a day.
But the cursed don't deserve such luxuries, and Wriothesley could only reluctantly tear himself away from that bakery, feet dragging against the ground on his way home.
He's embarrassed to admit it now, but that ordinary cake became the reason he scrubbed his hair a little harder and straightened his collar whenever the orphanage had visitors. Because some small part of him still believed that he deserved a real Mother and Father who would allow him to have that birthday cake all to himself. 
But a few years passed and instead of a bright red cake, there was blood staining his hands, crimson trickling onto the floorboards before pooling around the limp bodies of his foster parents. Maybe this is what I deserve, he thought to himself as the Gardes cuffed and dragged him out of the orphanage. Because there was no guilt—only a sense of hollowness that echoed in his chest at the sight of his parents' lifeless eyes.
It wasn't until he was alone in his prison cell that the tears fell, dripping onto the vision clutched in his trembling hands. A cryo vision—cold, like the water of the fountains had been on that memorable day.
Even after a few decades, Fontaine's winter winds are still as unforgiving as ever, but there's a warmth that fills Wriothesley's chest now. He has a title to his name, a place to call home, and a few friends he can trust.
And a family, he reminds himself as a small hand tugs on his coat sleeve. 
"Papa!" His daughter beams at him, the wind rustling her black and gray curls against her rosy cheeks. He gently tucks them behind her ear before hoisting her up in his arms. 
"Look," her excited chattering fills the silence, forming small puffs of white in the air, "we got you a present!" Following her frantic pointing brings his attention to you, leaving the very bakery that he once stood before all those years ago. 
Eyes widening, he gasps in mock surprise, lightly bouncing her in his arms. "Did you get me a cake?" he asks, a laugh dancing on his lips at his daughter's growing enthusiasm.
"Happy birthday, Wriothesley." You're at his side now, pressing your lips to his cheek before lifting the white box in your hand up to him. "For you," you smile, and Wriothesley thinks it's the prettiest sight he's ever seen.
And as he heads home, with his daughter in his arms and you tucked into his side, Wriothesley finally lets himself forgive the little boy who spent his childhood hating the life given to him.
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౨ৎ thank you for reading, reblogs & comments are always welcome !
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gooppoo · 1 year
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Neteyam fingering reader while she's pregnant? 🤭 (AGED UP)
oooo yum yum
how many fingers?
Requests Closed!!
mdni.
warnings: fingering ofc, aged up neteyam duh, making out, Neteyam doing his thangggg
His hand rested on your plump belly.
"Open up for me gorgeous." He cooed into your ear, lips caressing your softly rounded jaw. Since being with Neteyam's child, you've noticeably grown softer in areas you used to be rigid.
Your thighs were squishy, an adorable double-chin forming when you'd look down, even your cheeks were round and rosey. Above all - you were vibrant. Vibrant in the way your skin was dewy and an almost visible ring of gold followed you everywhere you went. Pregnancy treated you like a princess, and so did your marvelous husband - Neteyam.
Giggling at his tickling fingers crawling toward your center, he scooped your lips up in his to swallow all your laughter. He didn't hesitate to get lost in your lips for a few more minutes than he needed.
"Mmm come on mama, let me touch you." he purred between damp kisses.
Obediently, your legs separated enough for his hand to slither underneath your loincloth. Just to tease you (and toy with your new plush muscles) he pinched and caressed the steamy skin on your inner thigh. Through this, his kisses grew with a certain kind of soft lust that always lured you into begging for more. The careful, calculated swirl of his tongue against yours, even crossing your bottom lip as it retreated before sharing a wet embrace. Neteyam would hum and chuckle into your kisses, his tail lazily swaying behind him in lovesick fashion.
Not breaking away from his kisses, you reached for Neteyam's wrist to politely inform him the teasing wasn't necessary. That you were growing hot and slippery with the minimal contact you had. You guided him to your slick folds where he traced two fingers toward your clit. When he reached your growing nub, you hummed into his lips. He circled his fingers delicately, and your voice strummed.
"Let me see what I can get out of you." Neteyam murmured between intensifying kisses.
First he was slow, calculated. He let you ease into the feeling of being pleasurably stimulated and having a warm, honey-like goodness tickle beneath your bloated belly button. To egg you along, he'd spread your essence to your inner thighs and even to your lower stomach so you'd feel how desperate you were for him, and as a reminder to him how capable he was.
When your breath became quick to leave your chest you let your head rest back. Neteyam opted for the next best thing to attach his lips to: your neck and chest. Shamelessly, he'd groan into your neck before nipping or sucking at the skin, like you were covered in an addictive substance and he was a fiend. When he would regain a particularly sweet pattern on your clit you'd gasp softly, reaffirming his actions.
"Oh...the noises you make for me." Neteyam half-jokingly breathed against your skin, "What do you sound like when I do this-"
The tip of one of his slender digits teased your entrance before barely sliding into your sopping core. He was right to think this is where your moaning began. Pure, euphoric, provocative moaning. Another perk of your pregnancy-you avoided the added stress of biting back your bliss, you accepted the responses your body wanted to endure.
Neteyam smiled satisfied, "Just like that baby, you already know." There was a dangerous passion to his rumbling tone.
Sure to take his time, knowing the trick to adjusting to anything of this nature was slow and steady. Neteyam let his finger slide in and out of you, only prodding at the spot you both knew needed to be massaged for any real results. You relayed this not with words, but the rolling of your rounded hips.
"Ooo...take it easy beautiful. I hear you. I see you." Your mate reassured, using his free hand to settles your hips.
Now he realized that the build up had come to an end. This was the time to use his fingers and wrist muscles so he could watch the unfolding of your orgasm. Knowingly this required two digits to massage the textured sensitivity inside of you, he let another finger dive in and promptly work so you couldn't spend time being surprised by the new stretch.
Veins protruded along his forearm and trickled down to his wrist and hand that pistoned up-into you. Neteyam wasn't growing vigorous with his motions, but kept a steady pace that allowed him to focus on quality over quantity - keeping his thumb on your clit. This made your moans become a sensual mixture of sighing and groaning and whimpering. All of which excited Neteyam enough to have his hardening baby maker making itself known against your waist. Enough to have him licking along your collar bones and toward your sensitive, swollen boobs.
"Faster, please faster."
Neteyam complied wordlessly. One hand running laps across your thigh and under the garment dangling across your chest, the other nearing you toward your climax. You chanted for him to go faster and harder, please; but he replied worrisomely, "Don't want to disturb the baby, angel."
"Neteyam please!" Oh you were so damn close!
With a false, exhausted sigh, he obeyed, "I want to hear what I can do to you." His voice was mischievous.
How could he expect anything less than wonderful? Anything less than a perfect curve in your spine and a moan so arrogantly different from the others that anyone who listened knew you were cumming all over Neteyam's amazing fingers? He should've known you'd be coating his appendages down the the knuckle with a sugary, intoxicating wetness that was your cum for him to lick clean from himself and then you.
And once he was done doing his mandatory maintenance work, he spent time at your stomach, rubbing the roundness like a fruitful, hearty melon. Further up he had swept away a few luscious strands and granted kisses on either one of your full cheeks watching the high of your orgasm fade into admiration.
"Can I tell you a secret, my love?" Neteyam traced silly pattens against your stomach.
You hummed affirmatively, tucking a braid or two behind his ear, "Of course."
For a beat he let his words form in his mind, then chuckled lightly, "You taste like magic when you are pregnant."
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incognit0slut · 11 months
Text
Right Kind of Wrong (6)
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She never thought she would be involved in a murder investigation and encounter her one-night-stand again, the awkward guy who isn’t exactly that good in bed—Or is he? Offended by the sentiment, Spencer is determined to prove her wrong… But as he gets tangled with the beautiful stranger, he realizes there is more to her than what meets the eye.
Part summary: she is taken aback as the student becomes the master. wc: 4,3k
Series Warnings: 18+ explicit content (this part includes masturbation, forced orgasm, a little squirting, female and male oral), graphic details of murder
a/n: SMUT ALERT! If you like sexy stuff then you can just read this, but reading previous parts is better for context :)
Other parts: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14
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SPENCER HAD WITNESSED MANY THINGS THAT LEFT HIM IN A STATE OF WONDER. Certain books or poetry. Certain buildings, art, or places. Specific moments that left him in an overwhelming sense of awe. But no amount of experience could prepare him for the view right at this moment. It felt as if he wasn't worthy enough to marvel this splendor sight of a woman.
Was comparing her to a masterpiece of fine art too excessive? Although he couldn't help it, with the way she was sprawled along the couch with knees spread apart, she seemed to be all source of beauty and perfection. His eyes trailed across her glorious body; adorning every curve, every line, and every inch of her skin.
His body ached to touch her, to feel her hot skin underneath his fingertips, yet he wouldn’t dare himself to reach out. This was her moment, he realized. She was laid out in front of him on her own accord, wearing nothing but a coy smile and a certain spark in her eye. Who was he to interrupt a woman basking in her sensuality?
"So, is this some kind of a lesson?" He slowly asked after a moment, his tone provocative and full of meaning as he paused and licked his lips. "If you must know, I'm a very fast learner."
Her eyes were focused on his mouth, those plump lips now glistening slightly from where his tongue had just wet them. "A lesson, a show... you can think of it as anything you want." Then a taunting smile played on her lips. "I only need you to pay attention."
His gaze swept over her wet flesh, flushed and swollen, the slickness glistening from her core made every part of him swell. "You've had my full attention ever since I saw you that night. You're all I think about."
She felt herself crumbling at his confession. Her heart hammered against her chest, the charge behind his words spreading warmth throughout her body that had nothing to do with her arousal. "Don't say things like that, Dr. Reid."
"Why?"
Because I think I could fall for you.
She swallowed the thought away and focused her attention on this moment. Sex. That was what she should be thinking of, not the way her mind was going into a spiral of admiration that had nothing to do with physical attraction. Nothing else should matter when the man sitting a few feet away from her was looking at her as if she was his favorite meal.
"On second thought," she decided to say, her fingers slowly moving across her thigh. "Words are good."
When he didn't respond, she continued, her hand slipping between her legs. "Words can be an additional sense to stimulate the brain that goes beyond—" Her fingers softly pressed onto her clit. "—touch."
"That... is true," he softly agreed, his breathing more shallow as he watched her fingers moving in a circle motion. "The brain is the most receptive erogenous zones in the human body."
"Exactly. Now tell me what you're thinking."
There wasn't a moment of hesitation as he answered, "How beautiful you are."
She couldn't help the genuine smile forming in her mouth. "What else?”
She really was a sight. Chemicals suddenly flood his system, making his head pound and chest restrict, his blood entirely redirecting south. He gulped as she quickened the pace on her clit. "How I want to be the one touching you right now."
"Yeah?" She readjusted her position to spread her legs wider, wanting to give him a better look at her glistening flesh. "Tell me how you would touch me."
He could feel his body tightening with arousal. "With my hand."
She bit on her bottom lip, trying to hold her amused laughter. "I think that's already a given." Then she gently sped up the motion of her fingers, her voice coming out breathless as she whispered, "You can do better than that, Spencer."
There was an intense warmth that spread along his body. Hearing her call out his name as she pleasured herself gave him a certain control of the situation. It honestly felt exhilarating to be the reason of her arousal. He was the one she wanted. He was the one to have the privilege to behold her whimpering in desperation.
He then leaned forward, a new sense of power in his voice. "I want to run my hands all over you. I want to taste you." She hummed a response, eyes locking with his. "I want to see you writhing as I map your body with my tongue."
He noticed how receptive she became to his words, her body squirming as her fingers pressed onto her clit harder. He took it as an encouragement and kept on going.
"I want to put my head between your thighs. I want to be the one sucking on all that wetness." His tongue swiped along his bottom lip as his gaze traveled down the slickness dripping between her legs. "Look at how soaking wet you are, taking pleasure in my voice as you desperately play with yourself."
Y/n believed Spencer was a smart man. She also believed it when he said he was a fast learner, yet actually hearing his erotic suggestion while he watched her so earnestly drove her over the edge. Her other hand slid across her breast, pinching her aroused nipple as she continued the erratic movement of her fingers. Her eyelids dropped at the sensation traveling through her body.
"I want to make you feel good until you can't breathe," she heard him say, his voice growing more strained. "Until you can't see, until you can't think of anything else but the overwhelming pleasure I will give to you."
She whimpered out a desperate sigh. The snarl of pleasure that tore itself from his throat at her desperation was unlike anything he had ever experienced before. This glorious feeling of knowing she craved him, that she needed him as badly as he did was indescribable it gave him more power.
"I want to ruin you in the best way possible."
She inhaled sharply, time standing still for a moment. Her eyes then snapped open, landing on him splaying his hands over his knees. Her insides wrenched. Her chest was heaving as her fingers slowed down while she tried to register the refined yet filthy words coming out of his mouth. "Well, aren't you quite the poet."
She saw him shrug his shoulders with a bashful smile curling on his lips. "I read a lot."
A breathless laugh escaped her mouth. "Of course you do."
Then her eyes skimmed across his face, noticing the way his eyes glazed over her. His gaze was a slow pull, a gentle tug at the edge of her consciousness. It was evident in the way her body responded, her core alight with the fire he had been patiently building, throwing more fuel over it with each second that passed.
"You're so pretty," he gently spoke, raking his eyes along the span of her exposed body. Then he couldn't help himself as the next words slipped out of his mouth without much thought, "Put a finger inside yourself."
She tensed for a slight moment before she relaxed. "Giving me orders now?"
"I want to see how tight you are."
Her breath hitched at his words. There was a moment of silence as she slipped a finger into her entrance, her body quivering at the pressure. She moved it slowly, feeling the slickness of her walls clenching around her finger that she let out a moan.
"Add another finger. I know you can take it," he ordered, almost drooling at the sight in front of him. His gaze roamed her flesh, drinking in her naked body, the line of her neck, the peak of her breasts, the flare of her hips, the way she writhed with the pressure of her fingers, and her moan—god, the noises she made. It grew louder as he told her to go faster, her body quivering when he remarked that she was not fast enough.
"You can do better than that, Y/n."
She let out a loud gasp at the sound of her name, her back arching away from the couch, her eyes instantly locking with his. She felt so light-headed, so hot, so unbelievably wet. She started to come aware of everything. The feeling of her fingers digging into her soft flesh, continuously swirling against her heat, and the way his eyes soaked in her every movement. She could feel the weight of his stare and it was enough to throw her over the edge, her fingers moving at a quicker pace.
"Are you close?"
"Yes," she confirmed, her legs beginning to burn as she felt herself getting closer to the steady rhythm she had created with herself. Small whimpers slipped through her lips as she felt the familiar sensation tightening in the pit of her stomach, her mind already losing focus of her surroundings.
"Stop touching yourself."
His sudden voice pulled her back to reality, eyes narrowing in his direction. Somehow she managed to halt her movement as she watched him slowly rise from his seat, striding across the room with leisured yet determined steps. Then he positioned himself right in front of her, standing above her so that she had to tilt her head upward to see his face.
"I'm a man of my word." He slowly lowered himself, dropping down to his knees. A slow, sinful smile snuck its way along his lips as his hand grazed the satin span of her thigh. "I do want to ruin you."
She made a little noise, halfway between a sigh and a moan as a long finger brushed featherlight over her sex. Her fingers slowly slipped away as her eyes trained on him, watching the way he carefully slid a finger between her wetness, feeling his callused pad swipe along her slick folds. And when she thought she couldn't get more aroused than this, he proved her wrong by closing the distance, his mouth wrapped around her throbbing clit.
He grunted in delight as her slickness dampened his jaw.
"You taste so sweet," he murmured, and she felt the warm gust of his exhale into her heat. It made her walls flex just as his tongue dived inside her. She leaned back and writhed as he eagerly licked between her slit, wrapping his arms around her thighs, holding her in place as he devoured her hot flesh. She faintly looked down at him and found his eyes boring into hers, watching her intently as he wrapped his lips around her sweet spot and sucked every inch of her like a man starved.
She closed her eyes, her fingers tangling in his thick, untamed hair as she felt another wave of pleasure hit her. His tongue was pressed flat up against her, lapping at her eagerly before moving to twirl around her clit deliciously. She could feel her high approaching, thighs already trembling and he found that to be the perfect time to pull her in closer by the thighs, wrapping his arms securely around them to bring her core closer to his face.
Feeling her body shake, he wasted no time, tongue furiously licking against her and sliding the muscle in and out easily. His growl rumbled against her wetness as she spasmed, her face a mess of sweat and tears as he lapped up her folds, his tongue sliding into her and pressing on the walls. It didn't take long for her to moan out his name as the sensation struck her body, his hands firmly supported her convulsing body over his tongue to help ride out her high.
She pulled onto his hair with both of her hands, moving her hips against his face as he continued to groan and lick her through her climax. Utterly dazed and covered in a sheen of sweat with a pleasant tingling sensation traveling throughout her body, she watched as he slowly straightened himself, grabbing onto her arm and pulling her into a sitting position.
Then he didn't wait anymore longer as he buried his face in her chest, mouth circling onto her hard nipple. Shoulders tensing, she grabbed a handful of his hair. His tongue was lapping eagerly while his hands roamed her breasts greedily, trying to grab as much of her as he possibly could.
She was dizzy with feverish need, pulling him closer to her chest, getting herself drunk on the caresses against her skin. It wasn't until she felt fingers sliding into her pulsing, sensitive heat that she let out a desperate moan, louder than she intended to.
"Spencer," she whimpered, her body starting to shake again. "What are you doing?"
"Giving you pleasure," he murmured against her skin. Then he proceeded to prove his words by thrusting his fingers steadily into her while his thumb rubbed onto her clit. Her hips buckled while her hand fumbled everywhere in search of something to hold before gripping it along his wrist, a familiar yet stronger sensation pushing through her body for the second time.
This high was fast. It was consuming her so much that she could already feel the coil in her stomach, her mind going blank. She arched her back, instinctively shoving away a bit from him, but he moved closer, rocking his fingers in and out of her body at a more rapid pace, almost violently.
"That's it, I got you," he growled in a rich, rounded tone, slamming his fingers into her. "You can take it."
The pleasure suddenly exploded inside of her, sending her over the edge as she cried louder than before, the sensation sweeping her up into orgasmic bliss and leaving her panting heavily. The feeling was all-consuming, overwhelming in all the best ways. She let out a sob as he eased her through it, kissing her breasts while her thighs shook around his arm.
Her breathing slowed as she came back down to reality and she reached out her hand for him. There was a coy smile on his lips as he sat beside her, pulling her body into his arms as he gently hooked a hand under one of her legs, placing it on top of his thighs.
She might not be as smart as he was, but she could tell exactly what he had in mind.
"Spencer," she hissed, throwing him a pointed look. But her protest trembled as he gently kissed the corner of her lips, traveling along her jawline before he buried his head in the crook of her neck.
"I think you can give me another one."
A hiss of pleasure instantly flew out of her mouth as she felt him thrusting two fingers inside her swollen flesh. There was no mercy in his sudden movement this time, curling his digits inside her vigorously, the sensation had her legs shaking all over again. She could hear how drenched she was, the slick sound of him driving into her echoed around the room, followed by a harsh, loud sob ripping through her throat.
The heel of his palm pressed against her clit as he continued to curl his fingers inside her. Her thighs tightened around his hand, trying desperately to push him away from the overwhelming sensation. Her body was already shaking from the sheer number of times of pleasure, unsure that she could take much more.
"I-I can't—" She begged him, her fingers wrapping around his wrist, trying to pull his hand away but instead the vibrations began to ripple throughout her body. Her eyes rolled back as her mouth dropped open, no longer able to speak as a loud squeal left her lips, the sound distorted by the pleasure surging through her body. “P-Please. I can’t.”
"One more—just one last time."
She cried out and huffed breaths in her nose as his fingers curled and started to rock almost violently forward, swinging hard against a spot deep inside her. Her eyes went wide, feeling something entirely new, like nothing she had ever experienced before. "I-I can't, it's too much—fuck."
"That's it. Such a good girl." He growled, panting with exertion, using the strength of his whole arm to push in and out at a blistering speed. "You look so pretty like this."
"I-I'm going to make a mess—" A panic cry left her mouth, her whole body tensing. Her grip tightened around his forearm, reveling in the flex of his tendons as he rocked his fingers inside her violently.
"Then make a mess." He kissed the side of her neck. "Come on, make a mess for me."
He was forcing out filthy, squelching noises from her body and all she could do was lean into him, wordlessly panting needy noises. Then his thumb circled around her clit, pushing it up into her body so harshly she was gripping onto his arm for dear life. She couldn't take it anymore, her body shaking as the intensity rippled along her core.
And then it suddenly came to her—so intense, so violent, sweeping her away as she almost blacked out at the force of pleasure. She could hear his distinctive voice, triumphant, then turning into lavish praise as she screamed, focusing on a sudden pressure in her gut before a strong gush of liquid surged from her body. He watched her tremble and held her close to him as she screamed out his name, his fingers continuously circling her clit roughly.
Y/n had never felt a pleasure so intense until now. Her body was spasming, her legs were shaking, and her eyes were closed shut. She held onto him desperately and felt his heart beating under her palm as he kissed the side of her head, gently muttering praises as he helped her ride out the tide of pleasure convulsing in her blood. And when every drip of liquid escaped her body, she finally let out a sigh, her head falling against his shoulder.
The silence was calm after the wave, but his voice slowly filled her head with a hint of triumph. "So, did I do well?"
She was tired; utterly, delightfully tired. But she wasn't in the place to hear him gloat. Her eyes slightly trained on him, and hating the smug look on his face, she slowly turned her body towards him. She bit her bottom lip to stop herself from smiling as she pressed her lips on his cheek, softly, barely even touching it, before she trailed her lips down his jawline, stopping on the crook of his neck.
"I.." He breathed out, his voice sounding strangled as she felt his grip on her hip. "What are you doing?"
"Just reciprocating your words." She then opened her mouth, her tongue slightly tasting his skin. "I want to ruin you too."
Her parted lips were hot against his skin, his eyes fluttering close as she softly sucked on the spot below his ear. He let out a soft whimper, melting into her touch. What was it about neck kisses that made them feel so good? Was it the tingles that ran down his spine through to the soles of his feet with every kiss? Was it the feeling of intimacy clouding his thoughts?
Y/n wasn't even fully recovered from the pleasure still strumming in her system but she found herself reaching over, sinking onto her knees in front of him. His eyes went wide momentarily. Realization hit him as he understood what she wanted, what she wanted to do to him, his eyes studying the determined look on her face.
"A-Are you sure?" He asked carefully, sliding a hand into her hair. "Because if you change your mind, I'm more than fine."
She dragged her eyes up to his body, lingering for a few seconds on the vest he was still clad in and caressing the blush dipping along his neck before settling on his face. "I think it's only fair. Besides," she muttered, giving him a sly smile, looking into the passion brimming in his eyes. "I really want to suck you."
He grunted at her words, leaning onto the couch as he watched her. She wanted to bask in the warmth of his gaze, the utter devotion in his eyes as she settled between his thighs. She leaned closer, raking her nails over the contours of his legs, the material of his pants rippling under her fingers.
Biting her lip, she slid one hand over his bulge. He let out a sharp breath, desperately whispering her name as she unbuttoned the belt around his waist. Her movements were slow, lingering the anticipation in his tensed muscles. And after fumbling with his belt, he finally helped her, pulling himself out of the confinement of his pants.
She sighed in satisfaction. God, he was beautiful. He was thick and solid, warm and long with a slight curve. Veins dance along his length and she traced a finger up to the flared head, before dipping her head, her lips following. The droplet of wetness on the tip looked too nice to be ignored and her head completely emptied as she leaned in and licked it up.
He grunted weakly, out of amusement or desire, she didn't know—maybe both. Humming, she wrapped one hand around him and stroked him slowly. A pause settled between them before she finally took him fully in her mouth. He was all salt-tinged mixed with something undeniably him, his taste bursting on her tongue. She kept swallowing him down, her jaw stretching wide as she struggled to get every inch of him inside her, wrapping her hand around what was left.
"Y/n," he groaned between ragged breaths as her mouth wrapped around the girth of his thickness. He had his hand buried deep in her hair, holding it up in his grip when she tightened her hold on him, squeezing him gently. The added stimulation made his eyes roll back, a masculine sound of pleasure resounding in his throat. "You're unbelievable."
The compliment and the urgency in his voice made her wonder how much she was able to make him lose control. She swirled her tongue around him, swallowing him back down as she give him a rough, firm pump. She hollowed her cheeks and greedily inhaled him. His smooth, warm length slid across her tongue and he hit the back of her throat. The vibrations traveled down, shooting through his veins and he almost came apart right there.
"Shit," he rasped out, tugging on her hair as his hips jerked up, and she gagged, rearing back off with a cough, eyes watering. "You're taking me so well."
She couldn't stop the proud smile forming on her face. She was the one who made him lose control—the one who could awaken the dumbstruck look in his eyes. Her mouth enclosed around him again and she repeated the movement, trailing down his cock with her tongue, hands twisting back and forth, lips sliding back down until she had every inch of him in her mouth. He took her head in a tender hold and slammed her face down, his hips flexing to meet her.
The low wet sounds of her gagging meld with his gravelly broken moans were so erotic. She glanced up at him, brow-raising mischievously as she moved her head in a rapid motion. He panted another hoarse sigh out, his chest heaving as he inhaled a lung full of desperately needed air, hips jolting upward.
"I can't hold any longer," he whispered hoarsely.
He was on the edge of his release, she could feel him pulsing in her mouth. The mixture of intimacy and pleasure overwhelmed his body, and instead of pulling away, she only grew more aggressive in her attempt, sucking harder and tongue pressing firmer. Her efforts were rewarded by the hot ropes of liquid hitting her throat. His head was starting to spin, stars danced behind his eyes as he felt her swallow everything he had to give, save for the small dribble past her lips as she unraveled her mouth around his shaft.
She smiled up at him, enjoying the way he was leaning back after his bliss, and despite how heavy his body felt, he used a thumb to wipe away the line of liquid on her mouth. "I think we both are very much ruined."
She let him pull her up, settling himself on top of his thighs. His wide hands engulfed her face before he brought her down to him, capturing her lips in a soft, searing kiss. He kissed her with every ounce of power he had. Kissed her as he had daydreamed about so many times. He kissed her as he had never kissed anyone before, and it was messy and rough and probably looked horrific from a different point of view, but it felt right.
Then he pulled away, yet kept his hold on her. She carefully resigned herself, feeling completely in the moment with him, her eyes lost in his lingering gaze as she scanned over his features. His eyes appeared darker in this light of the room and angle, but she could still see the softness of them.
He suddenly reached out and brushed a loose strand of hair behind her ear. The unexpected action had her freeze above him. It awfully felt too intimate, but on the other hand, it felt... somewhat peaceful. Calming. Serene.
And at that moment, she suddenly became aware of their surroundings, of what had took place. The way she was naked and perched on his lap. The way he was mostly fully clothed. The way they were trying to catch their breath.
Then her knee grazed against the deadly weapon still attached to his hip and she jerked, becoming aware of who he was, who she was supposed to be. This unexpected turn of events was already a slight curve in the dynamic between an authority and somebody who was involved in a case.
An unsettling feeling suddenly weighed in her gut as she studied his face, pushing and pulling her consciousness as if she was stepping into a pit of regret… into something that was unforeseeable—into something that wasn't going to end well.
>> NEXT PART
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