#different food choices

[inkskinned]

im gonna start a fight; and, at the same time, i need you to take this in the most good-faith way possible, but:

videos that involve body-checking and intentionally (and uncritically) show a mealplan of an unhealthy number of calories are just a revamped version of pro-ana food diaries.

and yeah, i know there's arguments. i address some of them under the cut. but at the end of the day, we're just coming back to romanticizing mental illness; we've just found a better platform for it.

this is already something we've done. we knew it was wrong and tried to stop it. and tbh. it just wasn't enough.

there are people who argue "well, what if you have an eating disorder, you can't help it if you don't eat!" except that as someone with an ED; we are not infants. we know what we're doing. part of having an ED is that you are like, maybe too self-aware. even if we can't help our own food choices, we don't need to fucking romanticize the disorder - something we've been warning you about since 2013. there are hours of setup, filming, and editing that go into these videos. they do not happen to fall into place randomly. there is a reason they are pieced together to be beautiful, bright, inspiring.

there's this woman who pretty much only posts daily plans under a normal amount of calories, and everyone defends her saying but it's better than nothing! and i'm like. except she opens those with images of her showing off her body and provides no context in the video or caption that suggests that she believes what she's doing is unhealthy. she has hundreds of thousands of followers on a platform designed for young kids and teens. i refuse to believe that by accident her content just happens to be cheery advice on "healthy" versions of starving.

for any other symptom of mental illness, we would be incredibly enraged by this kind of placid acceptance of a "tips and tricks" fast-start guide. imagine if people posted pink & pretty videos saying "best places to cut yourself" as if it was a fucking storytime. we, as a society, are so fucking fatphobic that we would rather accept blatantly harmful displays of self harm than admit that we are obsessed with a hyper-thin body type.

i am not suggesting someone never talks about their disorder. i talk about mine. actually, it's a plot point in my book.

here's the difference: i recognize it's a fucking mental illness. i am very careful to never mention a specific weight, eating pattern, or calorie plan. i always make sure to position it as something that ruined my fucking life. i do not put cheery music in the background and hearts and sparkles over my worst moments. i do not film it in bright light. i do not start each passage with an image of a thin body followed by "here's how to look like her."

eating disorders should not be framed as aspirational. and the problem is that society worships the "after" image, so long as you don't get too sick. there is a reason so many people who quit being "influencers" will later admit - i wasn't eating well that whole time; an obsession with food was completely destroying my life.

we let any uncredited, uncertified person write the most backwards, fucked up shit about how to get the body you desire! because the underlying, secret belief is: well, at least they're thin! and the real thing that fucking gets me each time - they make fucking money off of it. their irresponsibility and societal harm literally pays off for them.

"why do you care so much." "don't like it don't look." "so what if people experiment with new ways of thinking of food?"

thank you for asking. we're about to get extremely personal. it's because when i was 18 i discovered "thinspiration"/"thinspo." and it absolutely influenced, shaped, and codified my pre-existing eating disorder. i went from having some troubling habits and traits to being incredibly unwell within what felt like a matter of days. there were actual pages designed to train me on how to have an ED correctly. it was all so suddenly easy. i was sick; and the nature of the illness meant - i wanted to be sicker.

it takes an average of 7 years for a person to fully recover. i know this personally - even now, 10 years from the worst of it, i still fucking struggle. i am so much happier now and i eat what i want and i literally don't think about food at all (19 year old me would shudder) and yet - i still fucking know the calories of plain toast with butter.

an eating disorder is one of the deadliest types of mental illness. over 1 in 4 people with an ED will attempt suicide.

and i'm sorry. i just do not see the exchange rate of "high rate of engagement" versus "the value of a human life."

#and there's something else in there about like .... #tbh once i got over something like 1k followers #i stopped being specific about my ED for a REASON. #yes on ur personal locked blog that u use like a diary go ahead etc #but we are OBVIOUSLY not talking about that. we're talking about the sheer NUMBER of people i could be talking about #in that one paragraph. that you and i probably were thinking about 2 different influencers #bc they get to say that they're just posting FITNESS and if it's FITNESS it's OKAY and im like #jesus christ lord almighty #every person in recovery from an ED: this is incredibly dangerous holy shit do you know how much this would have triggered me #each of these ppl: how dare you!!!!!!!!! i am only harming those who WANT to engage with my content!!!!! #their followers: leave them alone !!! they can't help that they make an hours-long choice to frame their disorder as if it was #fucking cottagecore !!!! #like girlie this person needs THERAPY #again! i didn't even have that large of a following before i IMMEDIATELY deleted any specific mention of calories food etc #bc i recognize responsibility and i didnt EVER want to even ACCIDENTALLY encourage this #and im not even GETTING PAID FOR THIS!!! #aND THEY ARE!!! #something something something they know this content makes them money #they don't give a SHIT about u babe

[veinsfullofstars]

Daroach: *slaps roof of DMK* This bad boy can fit so much salt in- *is soundly punted into the sun by DMK*

(ID: Kirby series fanart comic of Daroach and Dark Meta Knight having a snack break and being silly, based off of this incorrect quote. Transcript below the cut. END ID.)

I told myself this would just be a quick sketch. Y'know. Like a liar. Anyway, thank you for the inspo, @incorrect-star-allies! (I hope you don't mind that I took some liberties with the quote. ^^' I can never resist adding some extra characterization, haha.)

Started 03/14/24, finished 03/15/24.

---

Transcript:

Panel 1

*DMK sits on the ground in his cape and armor, his mask tilted up to the top of his head as he prepares to take a bite out of a foil-wrapped burrito, one eye opened to glance towards our left. Daroach - holding up a container of strawberries in his paws - enters from our left and plops down beside the knight (SFX: POF).*

Daroach: Hey, sunshine! Whatcha eatin'? (Looks tasty!)

Panel 2

*DMK tilts his mask down as he chews, the burrito now turned to show a single bite taken out of it. Daroach turns his head to look slightly over the knight's shoulder, leaning heavily on one paw and idly digging into the container of strawberries set between his feet with the other.*

DMK: Eh, you wouldn't like it. It's really salty.

Panel 3

*Daroach turns back to lift a strawberry towards his open mouth, smiling smugly with his eyes shut and brows high.*

Daroach: Heh, y'sure about that? After all, I like you, don't I?

*DMK turns to squint at the thief through the visor of his mask, red lines of irritation shooting off from him in little zigzags.*

#veins art #veins fanart #fanart #kirby series #kirby #daroach #dark meta knight #comic #incorrect quotes #can be read as platonic or romantic #I saw the quote and simply had no choice #a million other things I'm supposed to be working on and my brain said “bang this out in two days instead” and I said “yes dear” #featuring Dameta Squeent #(... when did I make it my mission to make every character do a Big Squint(TM) at least once?) #I probably could've given Daroach actual rat-like teeth... but sadly I am both a coward *and* a sucker for pointy chompers so here we are #How Many Times Can I Draw the Same Rat and Have Him Look Different Each Time: The Movie: The Musical: The Lunchbox #food tw #veinsfullofstars

[hayaku14]

kuroba toichi you need to stay dead or im going to fucking kill you myself

#you sick son of a bitch #if you truly love your son you wouldnt be alive #it's bad enough that you basically left the mantle for your teenage son to take up but you actually being alive???????? #you just out there living your life while your son is destroying his relationships chasing after something that you started???????? #his very motivation is your death and it's not even real??? the utter fucking betrayal??? #and maybe being kid has kade him a better magician and has helped him find out more about himself #but he shouldve been able to have a choice if he even wanted to be kid at all it shouldnt have been a responsibility pushed upon him #AND IF YOU ARE FUCKING ALIVE AND YOU'RE JUST WATCHING YOUR SON RUNNING AWAY FROM THE POLICE WITH PRIDE INSTEAD OF GUILT YHEN YOU CAN #GO FUCK YOURSELF #Honestly the worst #also that theory that maybe chikage is travelling the world because she KNOWS toichi is alive and she's with her elevates this fuckery into #a whole different level #anyway go read cuethesun's tomorrow and the next day #good fucking food and bad parent chikage and toichi enjoyers will be pleased ;> #lol #dc prattles #as much as i want happy everybody is alive kuroba family #i need touichi and chikage if she knows too to feel the repercussions of their horrible parenting and i need kaito to be able to let himself #feel the hurt and betrayal that he is justified to feel even if he is happy that his dad is alive #but i dont trust gosho to handle that nicely if anything i think hes gonna just handwave it and wont address it properly #anyway my point is i just need more hurt and angry kaito also if shinichi is there im happy #sorry i sneaked in a kaishin i cant stop the brainrot unfortunately theres no cure 🤚😔 #ALSO DONT GET ME STARTED WITH BAD PARENT KUDOS OOOOOHHHH

[amokslime]

I set out to draw sangchengqing but then I uhhh forgot about Jiang Cheng entirely

#is it not enough to simply draw your faves standing next to each other? i ask you #Nie Huaisang #Wen Qing #maybe in a different life they could have been [relationship of your choice] #idk i just work here #in gonna be honest. if we're entertaining a sangchengqing scenario i almost care more about these two's relationship than anything else #This is food for me only i think. but I'm eating so good! #mdzs #art tag

[tomwambsgans]

#tomgreg #im personally torn between st paul and rome #just bc its funny that theres a como lake in st paul #and Lake Como in italy is one of the most popular wedding venues #and was also namedropped by tom and be says 'but im worried about the fog' #so then like. for ppl to get the wedding memo and be like 'holy shit hes taking greg to como??“ #only for it to be a different como lake #just feels very good #but also a Classy Old New York wedding feels VERY tom #in any case it would prob depend on who all they even can invite #and i think tom would be pretty nervous about another big wedding #like he already got his Big Fancy Wedding with shiv but also the venue wasnt his choice #and look how that turned out #hed probably have this fear of declaring their love in front of too many people cursing it #ultimately i have to think its just family and closest friends there #and also theyd prob wanna avoid the roys just trashing it. especially roman #so they would not need/want a huge venue necessarily. food for thought #mine

[leafy-m]

I got Witch Hat Atelier Kitchen volume 3 a little early and guys.... GUYS!! THIS is what Kitchen in English should be like! 💥💝💖

If you like Orufrey, you have got to get volume 3!

#I don't know if the homophobic supervisor or whoever got moved to another project or what... BUT THANK YOU! 💝💝💝 #FINALLY! SOME GOOD FOOD! #I mean I am still side-eyeing the end of chapter 30 because Olruggio's line Should be about how they're finally living under the same roof. #BUT OH MY GOD what a difference everything else makes #They mention alcohol! They admit the loop chalices are usually for wine!! #The word choices for how delicious the food is is so great! #I'm gonna have to look up wtf the bananas are named after but aside from that!!! #Qifrey and Olruggio can actually say each others names and they're so friggin adorable!!! 😤💝 Mr I can go all day!! #I'm so happy ya'll I can't believe it 😭💝 #I feel so hopeful for volume 4 now #Also I'm half-way wondering if maybe they could revisit the translations for volumes 1 and 2 and maybe release an updated version maybe? #because I would absolutely buy those again if it were less censored and had better word choices. Just putting it out there! ❤ #Like maybe after volume 5 do a box-set with a little bonus item maybe and secretly slide-in the more accurate and better translated version #I'd buy it! I'd be first in line!! #Just sayin! #Witch Hat Atelier Kitchen #Witch Hat Kitchen #Orufrey #Witch Hat Atelier #Also there's some REALLY cute moments with the girls #(I say; as a total afterthought; sorry I'm so transparent lmao) #Jade talks WHA

[izzyspussy]

i think a lot of people have never been in a truly desperate situation but think they have, and this causes them to pass really harsh judgment on people who made bad choices when either irrational or having no good choices to pick instead, and i really wish people could get some fucking self-perception and work on their compassion skills and not fucking do that as much anymore

#jack facts #people be banging on about empathy this empathy that #and like sure maybe people have a measurable capacity for it but i can tell you what #that sure as fuck don't mean any fucking one of them ever bothers to make use of it when it matters lol #and i mean on the other hand it's hard to conceptualize how you would feel going through something you've never experienced before #i just wish people would be AWARE of the fact they don't know! #or like that there's a difference between ''i can't afford anything but instant ramen'' and ''i can't get any food or water'' #or a difference between being freaked out by spiders and having clinical arachnophobia #or a difference between ''my loved one is sick and i'm really worried about them'' and ''my loved one is dying in front of me'' #etc etc etc etc etc #anyway the longer i live the more i'm convinced that empathy is a garbage concept #and actually a more reliable way to act with true compassion is through at least some capacity for relative objectivity #the ability to say ''i don't know how that feels and i cannot understand it through comparison'' and to be able AND WILLING #to take people's self reports on their feelings thought processes or lackthereof in good faith and with sympathy #and also the ability to acknowledge that doing a bad thing for good reasons does not negate the bad thing being bad #but also should and does change what consequences are appropriate and/or most effective #and also like............... things people do in desperation or other irrational states do not represent Who They Are As A Person #or what it's like to hang out with them in a day to day situation #another thing i keep getting more and more aware of is like. if y'all can't even handle an irrational or impulsive choice that does harm #done by an otherwise ''good'' person under short term desperate situations #that they then do their best to reduce the harm of after the situation is over #i can not even imagine how absolutely unforgiving you must be of anyone who has delusions #and i mean real delusions and real psychosis not the hyperbolic babytalk version lol #like i don't think most of you even know what the fuck a delusion even is the way you act about things as simple & straightforward as like #fear. hunger. pain. #absolutely fucking exhausting

[caxycreations]

Just got out of a work meeting

Vent below the cut.

My face hurts

I'm not used to smiling so long

No it wasn't a genuine smile

It's the mask we call Business Caxy that smiles because a smile is friendly and friendly is good and good is business-appropriate.

It faltered once.

Just once this time.

When a Partner (one who works at the HIGHEST LEVEL OF EMPLOYMENT) in the company, who is so financially wealthy that she could quit today and never work again in her life, her husband could quit today and never work again in his life, and her son could NEVER GET A JOB and still be set for life (she admits these facts HERSELF)

said to all 40 of us in the meeting

"Money's just paper, it doesn't mean anything."

And now, as I sit here after the meeting, eating a beefy 5-layer burrito from TACO BELL that my roommate BOUGHT FOR ME because I don't have the money to spare for fast food if I want to make it through the month

I am reminded

The rich fucking suck.

"Money's just paper"- that paper buys medical treatment because healthcare is a scam. That paper buys food because we starve if we don't have it. That paper buys safety and shelter for us and our loved ones.

It's just paper, sure.

But it's pretty fucking important, and the fact it means so little to you means you don't deserve a goddamn cent of what you have, because I can list TEN PEOPLE I KNOW who, if I gave them $5 today, they would BEG me not to because "That's five dollars!! You don't need to spend so much on me, I'll be okay!" as they sit there with growling stomachs and aching bodies.

Meanwhile that woman sits in a $1,000 office chair at a $5,000 desk in a million dollar home and tells US that money is just paper.

I fucking hate the corporate elite. I swear to fuck when I get to the point I'm making as much as she is, not a goddamn cent beyond what I need is going to myself.

I'm taking care of my needs, my life goal of travelling, and if I know of someone in need I'm making damn sure they're sorted for as long as they need because I'll be fucking DAMNED if I ever turn into the kind of person that can sit comfortably on a multi-million dollar fortune while people around me suffer and I go into fucking ZOOM MEETINGS to tell those very people "Money's meaningless".

#vent #swearing #strong language #money #fuck the rich #if im ever rich ill burn cash on every little thing people need #fucking throw that shit away to whoever needs it cause i dont #i need food #clothes #shelter #and gas money #beyond that i dont need shit #wants are different #they dont matter #if my choice is to be rich and have all i want or just have my needs met and know the people around me have all they want #i will sacrifice every penny on gods green earth

[lucy-ghoul]

one thing that must be said about coriolanus and katniss is that they both share such a snarky inner voice that despite the seriousness of thg saga (especially mockingjay - the last chapters almost reduced me to tears, it was that heavy) it made me chuckle more than a few times

#coryo is such a petty bitch tho sjehdhdh #there are interesting similarities but also very stark differences! #1. they both have an obvious fixation on food and their growth was somewhat stunted by malnutrition #2. they both have a special memory token from one of their (dead) parents and are emotionally distant from the other #3. they're both survivors (katniss even describes snow in mockingjay as 'the consummate survivor') but coryo relies on his charm and cunning #(a lot of what he shows outwardly is a carefully trimmed performance) #while she's a born hunter and also quite smart but not a planner (actually i'd say katniss can be quite impulsive sometimes) #but she's also forced to perform (in completely different circumstances and a life or death situation) #and i think that's one of the reasons snow thinks everything that comes out of her mouth is a lie. he's projecting #the major difference so far is obviously that coryo is such a snob asshole lmao #but... unpopular opinion: he doesn't start as evil incarnate and i don't understand how people could come out of tboas with this take #that's the point! he gets corrupted by his own choice #but the boy he used to be (as much as he was a capitol born and bred elitist not exactly endorsed #with a huge capability for emotional depth and human warmth) would be horrified by a lot of the crimes he committed later in his life #so far he's just an annoying teenager. emotionally stunted and not very sincere but not an evil guy by any means #anyway both his and katniss' sarcasm are a++ #val rereads thg #val speaks #val rambles in the tags #txt

[champagnewishes]

ok i heard watcher has put up an update and i basically got the tldr from literally everyone. im so so glad they responded and took the feedback and criticism people have given!!! as much as i was complaining about the whole thing, i DO want to support them but it just wasn't feasible long-term (paying 5.99usd/mo for what seems to be just 4 videos).

now that it's been addressed, im more likely to subscribe on their website when/if im able JUST to support them cause honestly i could wait a month for the free yt release but i actually do want to support them and help them succeed!!!

#watcher entertainment #like i really just wanna support them #specially with andrew and adam now on board too #the initial video just wasnt it #like it really put me off #if u had the ability to support them anyway what makes this different?? u might ask #it's that i feel like i actually HAVE a choice to support them #whereas the initial decision felt like well transfer and pay us on the other website or bye forever #this recent decision feels like well if ur able to support us thanks! but if u cant see u in a month anyway!! #like does that make sense???? idk #idkkk i just want silly goofy videos of ghost and food #like it doesnt even have to be high tv quality with cinematography #give me shot on a iphone!!! give recycled digital cameras with shitty qualities!!! give me food that looks expensive but isnt actually!! #like specially in this economy!!! expensive food will never be preferred by the common mass!! id rather watch meals that i can afford

[littlecafe]

i’ve been obsessed with this game for a couple months now called livly island and it’s so funny because there’s literally nothing to do in it but ironically that’s what keeps me going on because i don’t feel pressured to have to do much!! it’s a decorating, dress up, basic pet gacha game and you mainly do your dailies and go water and harvest trees and take care of your pets

when you first join you get 10 free pulls in the “tutorial” phase but they make you pull it on the current newest banner only, so i noticed a new banner is coming into the game today so i screenshot both banners so you can choose which one you like more:

teapot image, the newest one right now it’s already in game so if you like it start now and you’ll get 10 free pulls on it

succulents and keyboard image, this will be added into the game later today (12pm japan time, roughly 7hrs away) so if you like this one more then wait until that time to download the game and you’ll get the 10 free pulls on that one instead

even though it’s a gacha game, one good thing is that it let’s you trade your duplicate items with other players (it uses gacha currency to trade but the cost is less than a single pull so it’s actually better!) the english player base isn’t as big as the japanese and chinese player base but the game has google translate built in so it’s not too hard to understand each other 

my id in game is pkxmf7h5 if you’d like to add me! you can also ask me anything if you need help, it’s a simple game but there are some quirks and it took a while for me to get used to their menus and submenu setup lol

#just helping you out so you can at least kind of have a choice for the 10 pulls!! #a little more about the tree thing since it's like a central part of the game #watering and harvest trees (you just tap the tree) have a chance of dropping food and gacha currency!! #the fruits you harvest from the trees are used to make different kinds of pets (called livlys) #you can water anyone's tree but you can only harvest from your friends trees so be sure to send out friend requests so you can get fruit #that means all livlys are creatable! even ones that come from expired gacha banners which is relieving #the game also makes it very easy to find people with the tree from the livly > potions menu #go in there and click whichever livly you like and click their fruit #that will pull up a page that gives a list of active people that currently have that tree on their island and u can try adding a few #i dont really get fomo anyways but this game is pretty good since the gacha banners stay for 6 months it also has pity #and trading exists and also u dont even need the tree for fruit so you wont feel bad if u dont pull it!! #i might talk more about this game later if i feel like it but u can just ask me if u need help #i literally go on for like 10min at a time i only stay longer if im decorating or dressing up hehe #simple game for simple brain #tea talks

[eyeshield21trash]

Currently on a fitness journey, and I was curious on what other people recommend for protein. I take a range of vitamins and supplements, but I need to include other options. Been working out every day since December, and have gained at least 6 pounds in muscle. But, would like to hear other advice.

#fitness #meggles problems lol #I can definitely tell a difference with the food choices I make #advice #It has been a good journey for me taking in account of my planet fitness membership

[ukulelegodparent]

It's always a wonderful experience to see recipes from another country that are also a cultural dish where you're from BC it has you feeling really anything on the spectrum from 'oh just like we do it here' to 'hm interesting take might try that' to 'excuse me you do WHAT now????' to 'Heathens! Heretics! How dare they! Tasteless folk!!!!' and of course there's also the occasional 'wait that is GENIUS! That sounds like it could make a dish I had to be FORCED to eat as a child edible or even enjoyable!!' and of course also 'why does your culture often have such good takes on food yet you guys also eat this shit that barely qualifies as dog food?'

#so for the first there are obviously many examples. eg pancakes #and by pancakes i mean like i as a german look at czech pancakes and go 'mhm same thing' #for the second one I actually can't think of anything rn but i have had that experience #fourth one was eg my czech friend when she ordered Kartoffelpuffer in Dortmund and they came with apple sauce #fifth one was me when I bemoaned my hatred of Kartoffelpuffer to said czech friend and she told me what they put into bramboráky #sixth one is aspik obvsly #oh I guess smažák is second. like yes! fry cheese other than camembert! that's a great idea!!! Love it! #also I'd like to point out that this is in stark difference to when it's different takes on cultural dishes from broadly within your own #culture #then if you do one single thing differently than i do you are wrong and should be punished for crimes against food #this especially goes for naming food. #But also in general. #third one was btw when i found out that some poles put raisins into cheesecake. I don't even have an opinion #that shit's just weird #but this is a great example for my point bc if that was people from a german speaking country it would be on. sight. #for crimes against food. bc there is one right way to make a cheesecake and that's with Mürbeteig and in general the way my mum makes it. #if you're german and you make your cheesecake with yeast dough please leave right the fuck now #and re-evaluate your life choices that have caused you to stoop so low. #mürbeteig is shortcrust pastry btw

[yourqueenb]

Girl I—

#choices dls #choices dirty little secrets #choices #choices stories you play #playchoices #I don’t think people leaving her bad reviews is defamation or scamming but whatever 😐 #also ‘Mari didn’t do it on purpose’ #ok but does that make a difference? #this is why I don’t be eating just anybody’s food smh #choices app #pixelberry studios #pixelberry

[pepprs]

ok hi. not to be stupid about this publicly once again but it’s 5:34 am [update it is now 5:53 am] and i have gotten absolutely HORRIBLE sleep tonight. first bc i was so stressed that i couldn’t fall asleep until 1:30am. then because my sister is sleeping in our room again (long story) which is good for her bc she’s making progress w her ocd but it means that she comes in with h the flashlight on after 2am and has to check the room and she leaves the bedroom door wide open which distorts the white noise from the sojnd machine which is right in front of my bed. and she’s like laughing at stuff on her phone too so all the subtleties of sound and light disrupt me and wake me up and throw me off. and also it’s freakishly hot so i woke up a couple times bc of that. and now im awake at 5:30ish after barely sleeping for 4 hours bc im stressed bc it’s Passover and my moms bday and im leaving work early today and tomorrow for the “””””Seder””””” (which again literally is not a seder it’s just dinner w my grandpa) and barely have time to get anything done at work and haven’t done anything for my mom and have to clean the house for my grandpa to come over and we literally don’t even have a dinner table yet likr idkw aht the fuck we’re going to do.. and also im fucking STARVING. because guess what!!!! we have to stop eating bread!!!! and i usually have 4 slices with avocado / guac on them before i go to sleep but there were only 4 slices left in the whole house so i had 2 so my brother will get to have the other 2 during the day. and my stomach is howling rn. and we have other things to eat like fruit and stuff but nothing that’s not going to throw me off.. like im not about to eat an orange at 5:30am it’s going to set my throat on fire with the acid this early in the morning. and we don’t have any snack foods in this house or like anything that can be made without having to prepare it for a while bc of our diet (lol). and we don’t have any flatbread or tortillas or whatever yet. so im going fucking crazy and feeling resentful abt passover again and wondering what the hell im going to do going into work and not being able to eat bagels for breakfast after not being able to eat my bedtime snack and being this hungry and stressed and miserable for a week on top of everything else. lol

#purrs #food #religion tw #(sorry lol) #delete later #ive had a lot of conversations in the last few days (some of them w other jewe) and everyone’s assuring me it’s fine if i keep eating bread #if it’s for health reasons and im not going to experience kareth for that. esp bc i already do things on the kareth list and also gay sex is #on there too and there’s a lot of stuff on there abt ppl being impure for having their periods too so.. just my two sent’s but i think thats #all ​fucking insane and a clear sign that those rules were not made by god and that they were made by prejudiced human beings. bc i believe #in spinozas god i think. and spinozas god would not punish humans for being humans. and would not want humans to suffer and suppress #themselves out of worship. though im not saying that you shouldn’t suffer or suppress yourself or whatever or find meaning in that if you #want to like im thinking abt Yom Kippur and stuff. but idk. im so conflicted. i stirred up this whole big crisis for myself about being #jewish and it’s very embarrassing and i don’t want to die or doom my future children or go to hell or whatever but apparently that’s already #gonna happen to me for like.. not observing shabbat and almost certainly cutting fruit during Shabbat so. whatever. but continuing to eat #bread during Passover feels like a totally different thing to me. but also i know actual jewish ppl who do not observe passover and i don’t #judge them for that or think they’re doomed to kareth. so idk. it’s all so fucked up. i want to be full and i want to go back to sleep and i #want to stop worrying about religion and constantly being afraid im invoking cosmic consequences for living my life and wanting to make #choices that feel good for me. bc it s already so fucking hard to make choices when im worried abt my moms judgment and trying to not hurt #my family ang more than i already do by existing and feeling my way. bringing god into it too is a whole other level of distress and misery

[astererer]

they ran into each other by chance and now she’s talking him into seeing a movie with her at the local indie cinema because her friend flaked on her and has a spare ticket

#oc aster #me arts #this is like before they’re a couple btw #aster bumps into ingo and sees him out of uniform for the first time and is like wow u look different!! #anyway do you have any plans over the next 2 and a half hours bc i have a spare movie ticket here and i’d rather it not go to waste #ingo internally is like am i being asked out on a date #the answer is technically no but also yes #he says yes bc he’s curious about what kind of movie aster would be into and they go watch the red shoes together #ingo has never heard of the red shoes before so is surprised to discover this movie aster is so enthusiastic about #is a 1940s film about ballet #he’s used to her being more on the unrefined side of things when facing her on the battle subway #so is like this movie?? you?? interesting choice #he gets it once the movie actually starts though #especially once the dance sequence begins #i think they’d have a lot to discuss after the film ends #bc it’s a food fucking movie and there’s a lot to talk about!!!! #love getting carried away in the tags lmao ugh