Roxanne Andromeda

changeling bard (glamour)

(she/her) Roxy is a flirtatious and secretive woman. She chooses to appear as a half-elf woman, hiding that she’s a changeling. She works as a lounge singer at various Boramar establishments.

moodboard and art by @simothys

Roxanne is played by @simothys

Hello all! This story was inspired by the prompt for FFF89. Unfortunately it went over the 1000 word limit, and I don’t really have parts I want to cut from it. I still wanted to share and post it however.

This story was written from the perspect of one of my DnD Characters, Lemma Grignard, a human blood hunter from the Dwindalian Empire. She’s currently galavanting across Ravenloft in a COS campaign so this excerpt is a slice of her life before she got involved in all that Strahd buisness.

Word count:1600
Warnings:Excessive cursing and depictions of blood. Talk of violent intent.

@flashfictionfridayofficial

“We could dip our blades in silver?”

Yup, there it is. We are crouched in an alleyway, half a bock from our very dangerous life-destroying quarry, and Eldritch can’t even remember the basic fucking properties of well-known demons.

“It’s a fucking Vampire, Eldritch, not a gods’ dammed werewolf.”

“Lemma, you don’t have to be such a bitch ALL the time.” Lazuli offers up some unsolicited advice as per usual.
“Ya, just some of the time would be fine.” On queue, Julus slides in with one of his witty, snide comments. I usually love them, when they aren’t directed at me.

I glance over to Herold for some emotional support. My silent giant always has my back. He returns my gaze with a stoic head nod. My queue to get on with my plan. A real plan, not an Eldritch plan. I compose myself.

“Alright, but my Bitch status doesn’t change the fact that silver is a stupid fucking idea, Lazuli. Where in the hells would we even get liquified silver?”

“Don’t you got some in your bag?”

“No Lazuli, I don’t. Contrary to popular belief alchemists don’t just carry liquid phases of all the elements on their person at any given time”

“That’s a real shame. I’d sure be helpful."Julus teases. I want to be pissed at him, I really do. Teasing me and poking fun at me right before the big hunt. But that smile he’s giving me just makes it impossible for me to be mad at him, and that pisses me off even more.

"Charging in blades-a-swinging isn’t gonna get us anywhere but dead fast, even if we did coat them in something useful. Which silver definitely is not.”

Eldritch pipes up at this point, because why wouldn’t he.

“Whatever Lemma, you always overthink things. Have I steered us wrong in a fight? My prowess with a blade has never let us down!”

He does a couple of over-the-top flourishes that Lazuli giggles at. Of course she would think this situation is funny. This very, serious, deadly situation. I shake my head in dismay. I’m just looking out for them. If I really were a bitch I’d let stupid Eldritch run-in with his muscle and silver dipped blade and get his dumbass killed.

“Look, guys. What we are working with is a Vampire spawn, thankfully not a full-fledged Vampire. They suffer from sunlight sensitivity, and have a weird mutation that allows them to climb along any porous surface. They are freaky fast and super strong. Normal weapon attacks are essentially pointless. One thing we do have to our advantage,”

My eyes dart around the group, of which only Herold and Julus seem to be listening intently. Eldritch is still brandishing his sword for a giggling Lazuli. I take a bolt from my quiver slide its tip along the top of my forearm. I feel a familiar twinge of pain, followed by warm blood, then the tingle of a multitude of tiny electrical pulses zapping along the crimson trail. I dig my fingers into the open wound and flick some blood in Eldritch’s direction. An arc of lightning pulses from the droplets suspended in the air and zaps Eldritch in the shoulder

“Is our hemocraft.”

It’s my turn to garner a giggle from Lazuli as Eldritch rubs his shoulder with a pout.

“You didn’t have to do that. I was paying attention.”

I feel my eyes roll without direct permission from my brain.

“Sure you were, anyway…” I make sure to smear some of the blood while the lightning still pulses from my body onto my trusty hand crossbow before continuing. Can’t waste a fresh wound. Making the lightning happen fucking hurts.

“We can probably take it down with all four of us if we take the time to imbue our weapons beforehand. I have a couple of curses that I can do as well that will limit its movement. I figure we can have Lazuli throw hexes from afar. I will tick it for damage over time with my crossbow. Eldritch can keep it busy by getting up in its face and controlling where it goes. If it tries to run, I curse it. Herold can hang back and hold the middle ground in case it breaks away from Eldritch and comes after one of us in the back. Julus, you have the mutagens we worked on together that harden the skin right?”

“Right here chief” He dangles the gnarly black vial at me with a cocky grin. I find myself smiling at him, I can’t help. He’s such an arrogant brat.

“Use that. Spawn attack with razor-sharp claws and, well obviously, super sharp teeth. You’re going to act as a backup to Eldritch. Pop in and take some hits for him while he hits the thing back HARD. Now, the only thing I didn’t have time to prepare for was the regeneration ability. It needs to be hit with radiant light to halt that effect. Lazuli’s rite imbues her daggers with radiant energy, but sending her to the front isn’t necessarily the wisest decision, no offense.”

“None taken.”

“So that’s going to increase the difficulty substantially. I tried to gather some water blessed by the Dawnfather for this but Father Matias has decided that he no longer wishes to speak to me. For some reason.”

Oh, look. Lazuli has an explanation. Great.

“Lemma, you can’t tell a religious man his god has no concern for his well-being and expect him to be polite about it.”

Obligatory eye roll again. I really need to work on that.

“The Dawnfather doesn’t care though! Not on the level he preaches. The Dawnfather doesn’t keep his cathedral safe. WE DO. I don’t appreciate his disdain for blood hunters when BLOOD HUNTERS are literally the only reason he’s still alive.”

Julus snickers.

“What, you got something to say Julus?”

“Lemma, he doesn’t necessarily hate all blood hunters. He just prays for our perceived lost souls in the eyes of his irreverent god. Now don’t scowl.”

He coos at me as I feel my face start to twist into that distasteful grimace I can’t control.

“Some of us, have people skills.”

From his bag bouncing off his hip, he produces four vials of a sparkling, crystalline liquid.

“Oh gods, he actually gave them to you. The holy water! How did you…when did… how did I not notice you get them?! We all share the same room?!”

He snickers at me again. I feel a begrudging smile begin to fight for real-estate on my face against the scowl.

“You sly son of a bitch.”

“Now listen here, fellas.” Julus proclaims as he stands and hands out the vials of holy water.“ This is our first big kid mission for our merry little band. No backup, no support. We’re on. Our. Own. We gotta show the Unchained what were are made of. Show them we have what it takes to be part of the team the delivers the final blow to the pompous, bloated jackass King Dwindle and his tyrannical lunatics in the Cerberus Assembly. We gotta show them we have the strength, courage, and intelligence to take down demons on our own. Then, and only then, will they trust us to fight with them and take down the demons that call themselves the leaders of the empire.”

I find myself stuck in a moment of awe. I’m always impressed by his ability to rally and inspire us. Impressed, and slightly jealous. He has all the powers of communication and empathy that I desperately lack. Maybe that’s why I admire him so. Or maybe it’s that cut jawline and that sly smile…

Lazuli’s lazy slow claps from her seated position pull me from my drifting thoughts.

“Bravo Julus. Brav. O.”

Julus does an exaggerated bow. He regains his composure and looks to everyone. “Everyone ready?”

“Let’s fucking do it!”

“Maybe don’t blow my fucking eardrums before a fight Eldritch.” Lazuli says cooly as she gets up and pulls out her daggers. Herold in all his heavy stoic silence manages to peel his hulking figure from the wall he’s been leaning against and readies his war hammer. They all begin to walk away leaving just me and Julus in the alleyway we were occupying.

“Umm..” I feel myself begin to say something witty, but the words get lost as I look at him. Fuck, why am I always so awkward when it’s just the two of us. I feel myself fidgeting in place.

“Hey calm down,” Misreading my fidgeting for being anxious about the fight, he puts a hand on my shoulder to comfort me. That’s probably the worse thing he could have done right now. I feel my cheeks flush as his hand makes contact with my body. My world is ending. Kill me now. I quickly throw my hood up over my head and glance at the ground before he can see my face.

“You have a great plan Lemma. You always do. You’re such a great tactician, and everyone in the group is grateful that you’re always looking out for them. Even if they don’t act like it. Now, let’s go kill us a vampire spawn.”

He gives me one more pat on the shoulder before he goes to move out. My body feels hot. My head is buzzing. My stomach is doing flips. Gods, it gets worse every time we are left alone. I hate this. My emotions running amok. Taking control over my logical brain. I need to get it to-fucking-gether.

“Let’s go kill us a vampire,” I mumble Julus’s words back to myself as I follow my friends out.

Painting your Arcane Trickster Rogue for your Icewind Dale campaign is in fact, self care because I think she’s neat 

The Not So Triumphant Return Of This Blog

AnFari

Anfari are a species of sentient lemur like creatures that evolved from a very strange land.

Anfari are about 4 to feet tall at most but many never stand that tall as they have a slight hunch, or squat low. They have an appearance of a Ringtail Lemurs, though they are not specifically beholden to that coloration, and can have fur swatches of many varied colors. They are ambidextrous with both their hands and feet, and are incredible tree climbers. They are Vegetarians and get much of their sustenance from fruits and berries found on the harsh ground.

They hail from a land that as an enviroment is very odd, and just as harsh. It can only be described as “polar savanna with occasional molten rock flows”. It is a place where the trees are scant and the nights can get cold, and winters have heavy blizzards that sweep unfettered across the Northern savanna plains. In the long grass predators lurk, stalking the herding mammals that travel across the land. The land itself is Jagged and pointed rocks jut awkwardly from the earth. Lastly, the land is inherently volcanic, and while many mountains separate savannahs from one another, many of the mountain ranges house at least one volcano. Otherwise ponds and small pits of lava are common, and sometimes magma will flow from the mountains, burning a path through the snow and reaching the savanna, causing grass fires.

Though the Anfari live in a truly inhospitable place, it was key to their evolution. While the occasional Grove of acacia tree, the focal point of Anfari success comes from the Mōk Du trees, a giant species of baobob tree also native to the land. Some reaching up to the clouds they can be seen from miles away. With fire resistant bark, they are a safe haven for the Anfari, and the only place they call home. They learned the secrets of fire from the pits of lava and discovered Agricultural ideas from the jackalberry trees and fruits grown from the Mōk Du trees. The trees grow unfathomably slow, and therefore aren’t grown for food, but sprouting trees do exist. Otherwise entire villages are housed on the branches, sides and tops of the Mōk Du trees, with newer trees growing as a sign of the predecessors leaving behind a legacy for the next generations.

Anfari Society is simple, though they learned the secrets of smithing from dwarfs and the common language from humans, they taught themselves magic, and only tend to stick towards one type of magic, Necromancy. To them, necromancy isn’t about raising the dead. To them, it is a way of giving last goodbyes and helping in times of need. The Anfari believe the soul of one can re enter their body if a skilled mage can lead them back into their body for a time. Necromancers are seen more as shepherd than mage, and make sure that once their called task is completed they are laid to rest peacefully, while some even ask to not be resurrected before leaving.

In battle they are very nimble, and tend to avoid direct conflict, aiming for either ranged combat or to fight on their terms. They use Sickles primarily as melee weapons, and sometimes are seen wearing metal breastplates but generally favor light armor.

Stats

Ability Score

+2 Dex, +1 wisdom or intelligence

Size

Medium

Movement

30 land, 30 climb

Arboreal

Advantage on all Acrobatics checks

Prehensile Tail

Anfari have a prehensile tail that can hold any small object, and may wield small weapons. This does not add any extra attacks beyond the normal amount of attacks a creature would have from wielding two weapons. The tail can be used to hang from surfaces, aid in climbing, and any other action that requires 1 arm.

Iolanthe deciding that Gunvor’s done enough wood carving for the time being.

Concepts concepts concepts..

Maps for my D&D game. Figured a few of you would appreciate them.

Commission of a merman out of water 

Tell me about the silliest, most obvious mistake you’ve made while playing DnD, because as we know, mistakes are part of the fun of the game!

Once, while playing my level one wizard, I thought it would be a brilliant plan to set a bar that had been invaded by some mercenaries on fire, while we were working for the city guard. The mercenaries had knocked his twin sister unconscious twice already, and there were still several of them around. The idea was, if there’s fire, the bad guys will run away, and we’ll be safe!

In actuality? The bar was on fire and everyone got mad, and my poor wizard got knocked unconscious before he could even try to fix the damage. It was…. Glorious, in its own way.

B A R D A E S T H E T I C 🎸✨

Orpheus Valentine

air genasi ranger (gloomstalker)

(he/they) Orpheus is a bastard. In the past two years, he has been working with the Boramar Clawfoots, violent enforcers. He enjoys going to the gym and various clubs in his free time.

moodboard by @simothys , art by @mloking

Orpheus is played by @mloking

Gross!

Craw! My rogue trader from my homebrew dnd sesh “Ashes of Sycamore” which is connected to a comic I will be posting hopefully soon!

He’s a big sweet thing who loves humans and offers objects the party asks for in exchange for favours later. He’s been very helpful so far and an absolute favourite at the table.

Second up is Sheoldred, the Whispering One herself! She was a really fun necromancy/enchantment bard build. I wish I could have captured her mounted combat prowess better, but overall I’m happy with her abilities and spell repertoire. A lot of the options were just too perfect.

Stats: STR 8, DEX 16, CON 10, INT 15, WIS 10, CHA 20

I was forced to dump Str to make her Dex and Int higher, but it was a hard decision. Sheoldred seems really well-rounded. We know she has very high Int and Cha, and she also excels at stealth and mounted combat using Str and Dex. With power like that, her actual Con and Wis can’t be bad, either.

Race: Yuan-ti Pureblood

It’s snakey, it’s Charisma-based, it has innate poison and enchantment. It works out perfectly. I would normally change around racial ASIs (as per TCE) like I did with Jin, but +2 Cha and +1 Int literally could not be more fitting. That’s exactly what she is. A cunning, charismatic, poisonous little naga-thing. The fact that the magic resistance is widely considered too strong honestly contributes to the vibe.

Background: Spy

Proficiencies (Jack of All Trades, expertise in all skills with prof.): Deception, Insight, Intimidation, Perception, Persuasion, Stealth, thieves’ tools, poisoner’s kit, disguise kit, forgery kit, flute, lute, voice, Abyssal, Common, Draconic, Infernal, Phyrexian, Thieves’ cant

Our girl is really out here with expertise in all her skills… it really drives home the point that Sheoldred’s brain is massive. She is, canonically, one of the most intelligent Phyrexians on the entire plane (even if I unfortunately couldn’t get her Int score to reflect that well enough). Dare I say she might even be smarter than Jin?

Class: College of Whispers Bard 17, Mastermind Rogue 3

Sheoldred is a bard through and through, sowing discord and mistrust through the power of words. The College of Whispers was practically made for her:

“At 3rd level, you learn to infuse innocent-seeming words with an insidious magic that can inspire terror.”

“At 14th level, you gain the ability to weave dark magic into your words and tap into a creature’s deepest fears… The target interprets the whispers as a description of its most mortifying secret. You gain no knowledge of this secret, but the target is convinced you know it.”

She has some roguish abilities, too, with her affinity for the shadows and cleverness in dealing with people. Giving her even more expertises, forgery and disguise proficiency, and Sneak Attack just feels right.

Spells Known: Major Necromancy/Enchantment focus. I love the fact that Magical Secrets gives access to spells of any class, because it means I could give her some nasty necromancy spells. I love Soul Cage and Finger of Death for her, especially.

Feats: Mounted Combatant, Telepathic

Like with Jin, the mind-fuckery inherent in telepathy powers is perfect for her. And Sheoldred is, of course, a mounted unit, fighting astride a spider horror or the equivalent. It makes her feel better about being so tiny compared to the other praetors