no one tells you that being gay and being a dm is just Pinterest boards, incoherent notes app rambles, and creating Timbullfool Timbullfrog, father of all gods and inventor of coconut seltzer drinks
One of my players plays a dragon born based off a certain type of lizard and apparently that species has particularly acidic pee because they just asked me if they could piss on opponents as a turn of attack. Imagine you’re fighting a guy and he just whips his dick out and pees on you and it fucking BURNS like hellfire. What the fuck kind of hellscape am I on where I’m asked by my player if they can do something like that.
Anyway, so naturally I said yes, we’ve assigned it two rolls, one d8 to see how good his piss aim is and one d8 for acid damage.
hey guys mona ( my special little boy ) got kicked out of wizard college for lying to the dean and also technically robbing the city of waterdeep should he become evil now y/n
I've started writing down some of the dumb shit said during my DnD sessions, cause I think we're fucking hilarious ofc
Just flaccid enough to be unsettling - DM
DM: Did anyone roll higher than a 12?
Group: *nervous laughter*
KAREN: *chokes on wine*
KAREN: It's okay, I'll wash it down with more wine
Taron: Is bitch naked??
DM: Bitch is just wearing skin
Actually you know what, I'm just gonna touch myself - Taron
Wizard, the disintegrating horse - DM
It was the most perfect bubble butt I've ever seen - DM
He's as camp as a row of pink tents, that man is GAY - Taron
When the enemy has magical resistances and you don’t have any magic weapon... The paralyzed warlock with a magic armor (armor of agathys) will do.
The Gnoll character belongs to Gryzal
Hilarious moment and a weird use of the rule of cool